#now. off to prepare for tomorrow
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hello hello, are there any tumblr blogs u wanna talk & interact with more?
answering this slightly late - sorry about that, anon!
this is an interesting question because i genuinely am. Terrible at interaction lmao. trying to get Better but i am. forgetful
but people such as @mutantmanifesto @disastrouscanasta and @kafka-ohdear are all people i see around A Lot that are very very lovely that i don't speak to all that much, but are all very talented and kind <3
#rie answers#linh and ewi get shoutouts of course but Do Not Count because not gonna lie. i talk to them more than i talk to like. my family#now. off to prepare for tomorrow#which is basically just chores and then begin to watch the terror again#or gen kill. or btvs.#working 24s is interesting because after i get 48 hours off so it's like. i forget how bad 24hr shifts are until i'm halfway through one#i'm in a rambling mood but love to all xx
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Hatchetfield @femslashfortnight Day 1: Make It Sapphic AU
#once again we are ignoring the fact that it is not technically still day 1 where I live#look i am only like 30 minutes off so it's fine.#it's still day 1 in 3/4 of the US so we're fine#anyways here's sapphic Holloween because we all deserve a little bit of that in our lives#Inspired by the incredibly talented Snarky-wallflower#if you are reading this you simply must go check her out#she's an amazing author and a rad person so there are no downsides in lookin her up#but yeah that's crazy i finished two drawings in one day whoa#like i said i've got events back to back to back to back right now#so i've got another drawing to work on for tomorrow#but i'm not doing every day for this one#i've got art fight to prepare for as well#and work stuff to work on#fun fact: the most abundant mineral in the earth's mantle is Olivine#which is this beautiful green color#and even though it is so common#i do not have it in my collection smh#gotta get me some of that#did you know that i love rocks and minerals#i think i will start doing more rock facts because i've got plenty of those#hatchetfield femslash fortnight#holloweane#holloduke#miss holloway#duke keane#butch!duke keane#hatchetfield#nightmare time#nightmare time 2#kim whalen
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💘
#this might be the most scribble thing I post here yet bahahahahahahahahahahaaha#I still like how the hands turned out even though I didn’t finish them😇#but it’s pretty messy and the hands might be the only part I like🥲#but since this blog is my art journey documentation here you are#I was pretty busy today so no good art but maybe tomorrow we’ll see#I am preparing things to FINALLY answer my asks🥹#& if you tagged me in anything I actually have been meaning to respond!!!!!!!! my notifications are the WORST and so confusing on here😵💫#and I’m technology grandma…#hope u all have had an amazing day !!!! 🫶#my brother in law has been fishing and catching SO MANY sargo#(sargo = sea bream for the animal crossing playing English speakers😙)#AND ITS LITERALLY SOOOOOOOOO DELICIOUS !!!!!#i cook it in the weirdest way possible#you just have to gut the fish and cut off its fins etc#then you put it in a wet salt bed and cover it up…cook it for 30 min…AND VOILA ITS DONE !!!!!#I don’t add any spices…NOTHING…and this fish literally has the taste and texture of crab covered in butter#LIKE…😳 it might be my favorite food/fav thing to cook these days bc it’s so easy and fresh caught fish is just delicious😫#well that was my grandma cooking show of the day👩🍳#now you know how to cook sargo a la sal 👩🍳#also going back to the drawing🥹 I just love these two so much…#I love thinking of sweet moments…most of my angst is confined to writinc😆#the chapter I’m writing right now is SO ANGST DEPRESSING (sorry Eloise)#it will get better…I promise…#hogwarts legacy#hogwarts legacy fanart#hogwarts legacy oc#hogwarts legacy mc#eloise babbit#sebastian sallow#sebastian sallow x mc
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what the fuck is wrong with my pulls
#im getting prepared to have a meteor land directly on my house tomorrow to balance this out#literally yesterday i was like “guys do i spend my 300 tokens on logos potential or mumu” then the literal next 10 pull#well ok that answers my question#both wis and logos are at p4 now btw#how have i not gotten a random off rate non lim 6* is what im wondering#this is gods apology for 240 pulls for 1 arturia#gacha game screenshot
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At least I got to see the flowers before I got kicked.
YOU CAN'T BLAME ME FOR NOT LOGGING OUT, I WAS MID-CUTSCENE YOSHI P
#Mooncat ramblings#Endwalker spoilers#I was looking at the clock as maint enrage ticked down#profusely sweating#But at least I'll be able to rewatch the cutscene tomorrow#I would think at least#Now off I go to post a thing I prepared#before I watch youtube
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Freed from the chains of academic misery just to immediately be thrown into the dungeon of a Full time position
#lord help me#i mean I've been working overtime a lot so it's better to have some more hours I'll actually get paid for#but goood i already feel drained#(starting next week/month (tomorrow's a holiday so at least i get a 3 day weekend before that))#((although i will probably have to do some work over the weekend because i need to prepare some stuff for the new hires#who i have to train#and also we have our print deadline next monday (so i mean. the monday after next week? idk)#and our medical advisor IS ON VACATION until November 14th#HELLO??? i don't wanna complain about her taking her well deserved time off but like. a little heads up would have been nice#now i have to find another suitable person to do the certification of that one article#and we have less than a week?#god i hate next week#i swear we Just did this#and heaven help me find some interesting urology news or the newsletter will crash and burn#sorry#got carried away#void screams#work stuff
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> You are encased in the cement that is those you love who love you.
> It protects you. Makes you beautiful. It will immortalize you.
> Your legs are restless.
> You're going to have to move, sooner or later.
> The sun will blind you, at first. The wind will feel like razors against your skin for a time.
> Do you think it'll be worth it?
> Who would choose to become human, over art?
> There will be times where your once graceful shoulders will hunch in pain. Your formerly serene face crumpled in ugly anger.
> You will be so scared to turn around and see the wreckage. Chunks of cement and dust are all that will be left of the statue you used to be.
> Aren't you scared?
#whoah personal#poetry#i guess but also oh god this sucks#idk. im just thinking about who i want to be#and how that'll mean taking a sledgehammer to the person i used to be#and I'm scared that whatever is left after that destruction won't be worth it#that I'll be so much smaller and more twisted than I was before#and I'm also scared that the people who lean on me as i am now will topple and break if i change#what if i look too different underneath. what if it hurts them. what if they leave#destroying a person who based thenself off of the love others gave them is gonna mean rejecting the love i took#all for what? to become something else? to change in ways I can't prepare for yet?#or what if the people who love me are hurt in the aftermath?#i love them too. it's just im always scared that love isn't enough on its own#i cant just be someone who loves them. i need to be someone they love too. someone they need#god who even am i#i dont know who i would choose to be if i ran away tomorrow#thats why i wrote this. i want to run away and start it all from scratch#but im scared to run away. i know itll hurt. would it be good or bad?#this poem is inaccurate because it paints their love as smothering. its not. i smother myself and i dont know why#but its warm and nice and safe#this is also sort of about being trans but thats like. not even half of what this crisis is about#its not enough to just be a daughter. you cant just be a daughter or an older sister or a friend your whole life.#that cant be all of who and what you are. you have to be you above all else and thats fucking terrifying#idk. anyways iput sparkly license plate covers on my work vans 2 months ago and if my bosses find out I'll get yelled at#so i'm going to go take those off now. bye
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Stressed and loathe to talk to people about it
#me#text#im moving TOMORROW and one of my parents is being a matyr about it because i need help from someone she has beef with#up to and including asking if she needs to be out of the house while hes here and pretending she just found out he has issues with her#while also saying he cant have issues with her because he didnt tell her??#im not prepared i have no food for the new place and no soap either or silverware but i can solve that#and at work im behind on my training. which isn't totally my fault but i wanna be done#also lowkey think my friend now coworker is subtly bragging about being caught up?#not sure if its me or not tho#im behind because i struggle to ask people to sign me off and people struggle to sign me off because they dont know everything#or theyre busply#plus i had at least a week where i wasnt training at all#but today i need one signature one sheet and one body fluid count and ill only be behind on one thing and not two#also also next week i go on shift hence the deadline#i can get caught up on diffs in between work but body fluids are another issue
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//vent
God please. Please just go easy on me. Too much. It’s all just too much. Please
#first my shower stopped working#then I tried again and it worked but then lost pressure and I had to wash quickly#then turns out our card is with my aunt#then my cat is acting way off and I’m like 70% sure it’s a low but my mom insisted it was a high bc he was refusing to eat anything#so we gave him a couple units of insulin#and now I just have to? wait? to see if he gets better or if we’ve fucking killed him????#im going to the beach tomorrow with friends and I’m already stressing about not being fully prepared for that yet#and then all of this#I don’t want my cat to die. at least not like this#vent#vent in tags
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love my leather boots sooo much.. polishing them at weekends is my favourite chore by far I always look forward to getting to do it :-)
#just re-lacing them rn so theyre ready for work tomorrow theyre so shinyyy muah#when my next payday comes around im gonna get a second pair so im not putting as much strain on the leather by wearing them everyday#but i think im gonna go for a different colour to my standard black.... ik solovair do similar ones in burgundy or bottle green hmm#well i have a month to think abt it before i decide!#red is my go to accent colour but green would probably fit better with my work wardrobe... and i do wear work clothes 5/7 days a week#anyway.... i need to meditate and then sleep. i usually settle down for bed 9:30 but im a little wired cuz new med change#so ive been putting it off until i feel actually tired so i wont stress abt not being able to fall asleep and then make it worse#i will probably feel pretty tired at work tomorrow but thats okay i dont have anything taxing scheduled#feeling so much better now this weekend is behind me. ik next weekend will likely be difficult again but im more prepared for it#i need to book myself this trip as well before train tix get too expensive so i have smth to look forward to next month....#just debating whether i actually want to invite other ppl or not. itd be rly nice for everyone to come but with recent events i feel-#a little delicate abt social stuff and i dont want to stress myself out and get insecure bc its meant to be a treat for me#like if i invite other ppl itll become their trip and suddenly im in the backseat third wheeling them all#and ill wish i had uninvited myself so they would enjoy it more etc but the POINT is its smth i wanna do!!!! for me!!!#we'll see how this week goes. i dont rly feel ready rn to unmute their server yet tho bc ill just make myself upset abt next weekend#letting sleeping dogs lie for now... ill come back around eventually it always takes some time to recover from mood swings that intense#okay now goodnight! xoxoxoxooxo#.diaries
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revelation: it's actually much easier to study if you haven't worked for 6 hours prior to that
#and what's more important: its much easier to FORCE myself to study#studying itself isnt hard#forcing myself to do it is#and when my brain havent melted from being at the office and doing tasks its surprisingly easy to persuade to study#ive already done the translation and am gonna now prepare for a tomorrow speech in class#and sent off a test task for a job yesterday#still a lot to do but much less than i had just yesterday morning#arnold's diary
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Also, I gotta say, because I did draft the results post in advance obviously, I DO fully understand how Sam's ad bits end up so absurd, like, the moment you commit to a bit you really just have to keep escalating, jesus christ.
#tbh has the same vibe as getting into character for dnd. like by the end of it I'm like#'who am I what kind of person am I why can't I shoot fire out of my hands what's happening'#like walking out of a theater but like you were also IN THE MOVIE#it's like the fucking. stun effect when haste wears off. WILD#anyway now that that's done lol I do actually have to write some notes and get prepped for feywild intrigue game tomorrow :3#which is gonna be fucking wild. I have a Lot of fear.#HE WAS WATCHING CALAMITY THIS WEEK 'IN PREPARATION FOR THIS SESSION' I AM DEEPLY AFRAID#HOWEVER Amana did go to the Coramar-Seelie school of wizardry and SOMEHOW MIGHT HAVE THE MOST HP OF HER PARTY? WHAT.#so she might be fine. she is also fully immortal. power of the fungus babeyyyy
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oh christ i just realized im actually going on a 9 day roadtrip and ending up on the opposite side of the country. starting tomorrow (21st). hello ...
#ive been preparing for it for days but its kindof hitting now once the clock changed to 12 am. its not an imaginary future its Tomorrow#also i have no idea how online im gonna be since im driving for hours and hours every day + actually im going w someone to pennsylvania 1st#and we're hiking/camping a lot#SO........................#if i disappear off the face of the earth u know why But i mean. we will see. phone addiction strong#omg the queue function . should i.
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.
#I have spent. 8 almost 9 hours resetting my laptop. I chose the option to keep all my files but uninstall apps. and it has been restarting#and installing for almost 9 hours. yeah I get that the process will be long. but ffs#I have been bored the past few hours so I watched the smile movie bc I got reminded of it yesterday#it was pretty bad. the couple gorey scenes towards the end were nice but some of the acting and writing was just terrible#I was also hoping the movie would’ve taken a different turn. I think it would’ve made it more.. idk. I can’t think of the right term.-#-it just would’ve made it better I think.#I’ve also eaten a lot today. more than I usually do. more than I have in months and years and im upset about that. im already bloated.#I hope I don’t work tomorrow. I have to call in in the morning to check. and I don’t mind working but rn I just kind of want to spend the#day relaxing#I’ve spent almost 9 hours on this resetting part. and 4 extra hours trying to simply repair it in restarts#I also need to clean up my room. a lot of it. and clean my pets cage. it’s ant season now and im really stressed about that#the smell of sharpie returns and I am just. overwhelmed. I have 3 days to prepare for my special week long activity and im not happy about-#-that.#I also had some feelings earlier that im stressed over too.#im being vague about that bc i just don’t want to go off about that to everyone#im tired and overwhelmed i just want my laptop to finish resetting so i can stop fretting about this. i want to sleep#im tired. of so much#to delete later
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Caught up with a few drafts? Check. Treated myself to some ramen for dinner after this intense week of finals? Check. I'm debating if to play now HSR to catch up with the Penacony arc or do something else next and / or do my best to tackle one last draft. Decisions...
#it feels good to have more leisure time now#and be able to choose what to do#tomorrow will be the same#as I plan to take tomorrow off too#given that I have the privilege to prepare the last final#one day before#and then the grades#we'll... see if I messed up or not djfhjg#until then it's time to relax#after an entire week of preparing those exams
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Love having to help hold everyone else’s lives together but the second I’m struggling and need help then I’m too needy and being a problem
#god just once I want what I put into a person given back in return#I schedule and plan everything I make meals for everyone and drive people around#my whole life it’d always be my job to clean my brothers room and even now I’m the one that keeps others shit clean instead of themselves#and I really wouldn’t mind if any of it was returned#or at the very least don’t make me feel like shit#or like I give people rides but don’t get gas money and I make meals but no help paying for the groceries to make the food#and I can’t afford to sustain myself much less someone else#and I’m so tired#I work all the fuckin time#just once I want to get off and relax and not have to go and take care of a whole ass adult who’ll throw a fit if I dare say I’m hungry#or get mad at me when I run out of energy when I’m going non stop#ghost rambles#hh I’ll have some time to myself tomorrow morning before my blood tests at least#before I have to go home after and prepare for a taco night with friends#gonna go wander target I still have a gift card and maybe get a new piercing#I am excited for tacos and games with my friends I’m just so tired and tomorrow morning is my only break for the next week#I have so many appointments coming up and I picked up extra shifts
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