#now if i updated absolutely every week without fail that would take me a little over 2 years to post
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my shortest prose work on ao3 is 253 words. my longest will cap out around 450k if we're LUCKY. oh god 😭
#well if it caps out around 450k then it'll probably only take me another 2 years to finish writing it#and then we move on to THE NEXT PART OF THE SERIES#this crisis is mainly because i didn't get much sleep we'll be fine everything will be fine#that math isn't mathing though. hang on#40 chapters = 150k#450k = ~120 chapters#now if i updated absolutely every week without fail that would take me a little over 2 years to post#we're already nearing 10 months in but at the beginning i was posting every other week iirc#ok maybe the math is mathing#all i can do is just keep swimming#like i can make predictions but the important thing is. write it#we've already gotten this far we just need to do this again x times until the series is completed#dark lord wip
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could i request a oneshot where daryl is sick and y/n wants to help take care of him? just super fluffy stuff? thanks😙😙
Chicken Soup for the Soul
✧ Pairing : Daryl Dixon x Reader
✧ Era : Season 9
✧ Pronouns : she/her
✧ Genre : Fluff
✧ Word Count : 2.1k
AN ~ This request is so cute to me :,( I had so much fun writing it. Not much to update on today, but thank you to whoever suggested this! Hope you enjoy!
Alexandria had always been a place full of safety and comfort. With living behind the thick, tall walls and having some of your favorite people living only a few houses away, you absolutely loved the community you were a part of. The only downside now, was the cold months only getting colder.
Every time without fail during this time of year, it would get much colder than what everyone was used to all the time. Normally it would constantly be warm, almost scorching some days because of how harshly the sun baked your skin. But in the first few weeks of the new year, it felt like it was constantly freezing. Granted the temperature usually lingered in the thirties, it was far more frigid than what everyone around here was normally used to.
Which was why currently you were cuddled up on the couch, a fluffy blanket covering your lap and a book in your hands, reading in the dim light of your living room. You occasionally felt the warmth of the fire next to you creep up to provide even more heat whilst you passed the time, waiting for your husband to return home.
He currently was out on a run that had lasted a few days, though he promised he would be home sometime today at the latest. You were a bit weary of him going out in the first place, warning him that this weather was cold and unpleasant, not wanting him to be miserable out there. But he brushed everything off as the typical stubborn man would do, assuring you that he would be just fine and he could handle it. And though you knew he could, it still didn’t stop you from worrying the littlest bit while he was out.
But a sigh of relief passed through your chest as you began to hear the faintness of the familiar rumble of his motorcycle, signaling he had finally returned as he made his way down the streets. A smile spread across your face as you finished up the page you were on, before finding your bookmark and placing it in the spine, setting it off to the side just as you heard the engine of the bike shut off in your driveway. It felt like only a few seconds passed before you finally heard the front door opening, his heavy footsteps trailing inside.
“Hi honey.” you called softly as you swung your legs over the side of the couch, standing up to peer around the corner at him.
He grunted as he removed all the things from around his shoulders, looking up at you with a soft and tired smile, “Hey.” he spoke quietly, trudging over towards your frame to practically melt around you.
Your smile stretched even wider than before as you held him, rubbing his back soothingly as you heard him exhale deeply in relaxation. Just by feeling his tense and sore muscles around you, it was clear to sense how tired he really was, it was even written all over his face. The two of you stayed in each others arms for minutes in just peaceful silence, taking each other in after being apart for far too long.
But according to Daryl, even an hour was too long to be away from you. Meaning these past three days must've have been torture.
“How was the trip?” you asked softly, your voice being the one to break the silence that surrounded you.
He sniffled and cleared his throat as he nodded to confirm everything went fine, “Good.” he spoke, “Gotta couple crates of supplies.”
You hummed, “That’s good to hear…I’m glad you’re home.” you admitted quietly as you held onto him a little bit tighter.
His deep and vibrating laugh shook in his chest as he instantly seemed to agree, “Me too, baby girl.” he said before finishing his sentence with another sniffle.
You paused for a moment as you heard the small and distinct sound for a second time. Now that you really thought about it, he felt a lot warmer to you than usual as you continued to stay wrapped around him. It might’ve just been you reading too much into things, but something seemed a little off.
So you reluctantly pulled away from him then, seeing in his eyes now that he was utterly exhausted, “You okay?”
He nodded slow as you saw him swallow a bit thickly, “Yeah, just…just tired.” he confirmed.
But you weren’t convinced. Before he could process your next moves, you quickly raised the back of your hand up to his forehead to check his temperature. He sighed in defeat as your hand already made contact with his skin, your eyes widening upon feeling Satan's hellfire burning your hand at the simple touch.
That may have been a little dramatic, but he felt quite warm.
“Honey, you’re burning up.” you said softly as your hand moved down to cradle the side of his face, “Are you sick?”
He scoffed as he opened his mouth to deny it, but instead, he quickly turned his face away and into his elbow to sneeze loudly, the sound practically bouncing off the walls.
Your eyes rolled, “So that’s a yes.”
“I ain’t sick.” he defended roughly as he turned back to face you again, “Maybe yer hand’s just cold.” he tried.
“Uh huh.” you muttered, “Then how do you explain the sniffles and that dramatic ass sneeze?” you asked with a tilted head.
He was silent for a long moment as his gaze stayed on the ground, trying to come up with a good reason other than the obvious. “Allergies?”
You scoffed, “You’re sick.” you concluded as you reached out to tilt his chin up so he would look you in the eye again, “Why don’t you head upstairs and hop in the shower. I’ll get you some medicine and I’ll make-”
“Nah, no, I’ll be just fine. Just need some rest is all.” he interrupted.
You couldn’t help but tilt your head at him a little as you silently knew why he was always so persistent about this kind of thing. Daryl always felt like he had to tough it out his whole life, act as if nothing phased him in the slightest as he carried nearly the weight of the world on his shoulders. The truth was it made him feel weak, asking others for help, having someone else take care of him, he felt he almost didn’t deserve it.
But you on the other hand knew that he deserved everything and more. Sometimes it just took some reassurance to get him there.
“Sweetie, you are constantly taking care of me. Just let me take care of you.” you spoke sweetly and gently, your tone being enough for him to nearly cave right then and there.
Though he still looked unsure for a few more seconds, not wanting you to go through any trouble as he was capable of taking care of himself. He never wanted to bombard you with his needs as he was perfectly content with giving you everything you wanted, pretty much constantly waiting on you hand and foot. But still to this day for some reason, it felt odd to him receiving the same treatment though you had been doing it for years. You alone felt almost unreal sometimes to him. Like a dream.
But then you whispered one word, one single word that caused him to break.
“Please?”
It didn’t matter when or how the word was used, but you and Daryl both knew that if you used that word to coax him into something he was prepared to deny, he would always fall apart instead. You had a certain effect on him that he still couldn’t quite describe.
So with that, he sighed heavily as he felt himself sniffle again, “Alright.” he agreed.
You smiled softly and gently grabbed one of his hands to place a kiss on the back of it, “Good. Head on upstairs and I’ll meet you there in a few minutes.” you promised.
His face broke out into a lopsided grin when he looked down at you, feeling a bit hazy from the illness he seemed to catch, his knees feeling weaker the longer he stood upright. Yet he still couldn’t help but smile at how unbelievably lucky he had gotten with you.
“Yes ma’am.” he eventually spoke, breaking away from you to slowly head up the long and dreaded staircase, preparing to head for the shower as you suggested.
You on the other hand went straight towards the kitchen, picking through the medicine cupboard before finding the right pill bottle to take up with you. After setting it down on the counter, you grabbed a larger pot and placed it over the stovetop, before rummaging around through the kitchen for ingredients. You planned to make him some chicken soup, one of his favorites when the weather got colder. He could probably inhale three bowls if given the chance.
You cut up the fresh vegetables along with the chicken, adding it all into the pot filled with broth to cook before adding the many noodles as well. You seasoned everything thoroughly and made sure to keep stirring it so it would be perfect, knowing he was probably starving from not only coming back from the long run, but from the sickness he picked up along the way. But once everything was done you placed it all on a tray to take up to your shared bedroom, even adding some water and crackers off to the side.
Stepping up the stairs slowly and carefully, you didn’t hear the water running and only assumed he was done by now as you entered the space carefully. And there he was lying in bed, his eyes closed until he heard the faintness of your movements, peaking them open again and seeing the amount of things you had brought up. It was written all over his face that he thought you did too much, but upon smelling the soup you continued to carry, he said nothing as if he suddenly remembered how hungry he really was.
He licked his lips as he eyed the tray, “Whatcha got?” he asked.
You laughed a little to yourself as you placed it down on his bedside table, “Well, the tylenol is for your fever, and the chicken soup is…for your soul.” you said proudly as you handed him the pill bottle first to take.
He huffed out a laugh, “Smells good.” he complimented as he took the medicine you provided for him along with a swig of water to wash them down.
You sat yourself at the edge of the bed, “Did the shower help at all?” you asked as you raised your hand again towards his forehead, still feeling very hot just as last time.
“A little.” he shrugged, “Still kinda warm though.”
You nodded to yourself as you noticed he was shirtless, the blankets wrapped only around his legs as the rest of him was exposed to the colder air. But you then got another idea that would help, telling him to wait momentarily before you trailed off back to the bathroom. You grabbed a washcloth out of the closet tucked away in the corner before running the material under some cool water, bringing it back to gently place on his forehead.
He sighed at the feeling as his eyes temporarily closed again, only opening once more to look towards you and the things you brought, “Ya did too much.” he commented quietly.
You tilted your head at him, “No I didn’t.” you insisted, “In fact, I didn’t do nearly enough. I want to take care of you, I always do. Please just let me from time to time…okay?”
His tired eyes stared at you for a long moment, before he was slowly nodding his head in agreement, “Okay.”
A smile was brought to your face knowing that it was getting to be easier for him to accept the help, before it was replaced with a teasing smirk as you eyed the soup he had yet to touch. “You want me to feed you?” you joked.
He scoffed, “Nah. Then ya would be doin too much.” he said before leaning over and grabbing the bowl himself.
You laughed a little before nodding your head, “Well, is there anything else you need? Anything at all?”
He didn’t hesitate as he spoke his next words clearly, “Just you…can ya stay with me?” he asked as if he didn’t already know the answer.
But he did, he knew the answer quite well. Though a part of him just wanted that last bit of reassurance that you wouldn’t leave his side, wanting to hear you say it.
“Of course.” you promised sweetly, leaning over the smallest bit to place a kiss on top of his head, “I’m not going anywhere.”
~ Thanks for reading!
#daryl dixon#daryl dixon fanfiction#daryl dixon the walking dead#daryl dixon twd#daryl dixon x oc#daryl dixon x reader#daryl dixon imagine#daryl dixon x female reader#daryl dixon x you#norman reedus#norman reedus fanfiction#norman reedus x reader#the walking dead#the walking dead fanfiction#the walking dead daryl#the walking dead imagine#twd daryl dixon#twd daryl#twd fanfiction#twd
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Prompt #33 for N & C ler/lee please
A/N: hi anon! ty for the prompt :) hope you enjoy!
if you want to send me prompts to my inbox you can find the list here!
Prompt #33: "Oh? You want me to tickle you that badly?"
Missing You Making Me Laugh
Two weeks away from each other was enough.
Charlie had known Nick was going on holiday with his family well in advance. Nick had told him about his family's tradition of traveling to Menorca every year to get together with the rest of his extended family, and how one day he wanted to take Charlie with him. Even a few hours apart from one another at school was agonizing for the both of them in general, so two weeks in different countries was absolute hell.
Luckily, Nick had kept his promise of calling Charlie every night to talk to him, checking in on his mental health back home and updating him about his cousins' antics around the vacation house. He'd send him pictures of the dogs together, him and other relatives, and so on, but Charlie still felt lonely without the older boy next to him.
He wasn't afraid to let his boyfriend know how he felt when he'd call, and every time Nick would answer with, "I know, I miss you too. It's only a few more days and I'll be back." Then he'd give him that classic, charming Nick Nelson smile that always stole Charlie's heart.
It wasn't just Nick's company Charlie was missing. It was something else. Something that made Charlie blush whenever he thought about it, giddiness and nerves overtaking him on the inside.
Charlie was known by his friends to be extremely ticklish. He, Tao, Elle, and Isaac had had their fair share of tickle fights and ambushes, and for as long as he could remember, Charlie very nearly was always being ganged up on. He couldn't help it, of course. He'd always been a walking tickle spot since he was little, Tori taking advantage of it as her duty of being the older sibling. It was something he'd tried and obviously had failed at hiding from Nick once they began dating, more out of embarrassment than anything.
When Nick had figured out Charlie's ticklishness, he'd gushed about how adorable he found it and that it just added to one of the things he loved best about him.
Charlie had been extremely embarrassed at first, but slowly became comfortable with the fact that Nick wasn't weirded out by him. In fact, Nick tickled him at almost every chance he got, almost anywhere they were. It made Charlie feel overjoyed by the fact that someone wasn't afraid to be physically affectionate with him, even if it meant being at the receiving end of it all.
But now, Charlie almost felt starved by this absence. He didn't have Nick whispering teases into his ear as he held him close against his chest. He didn't have him chasing him around his house and cornering him before tickling him into hysterics. He missed Nick's goofy self whenever he got into his moods, and he wanted it more than anything. And he needed that now.
He was currently sitting at his desk in his bedroom, on one of his daily calls with his boyfriend. The sun was setting through the window, and Charlie knew he didn't have much time until he needed to get ready to head off to bed. He could hear Nick talking about his afternoon, helping to babysit the younger of his cousins, but he wasn't truly listening. His thoughts kept going to that one specific thing he had on his mind all day.
"Charlie?" On the screen, Nick's face was filled with concern, his head tilted slightly. "What's wrong? You look all flushed."
Charlie cleared his throat, "I-I'm fine." Then as an afterthought, "Sorry."
"No," Nick shook his head, his eyes narrowing. "No S-words from you, sir. I thought we banned that word for good."
Charlie bit his lip, his heart racing in his chest. "Oh yeah, I forgot. Sorry."
Nick wasn't oblivious. He could see the beginning of that cheeky smirk even through the screen of his phone.
"Charles Francis Spring," He said slowly, causing Charlie to shiver in his chair, "Are you purposely trying to rile me up right now?"
Charlie felt like his whole being was on fire from how hard he was blushing. Even through the phone screen he couldn't look Nick in the eye.
"Talk to me. What are you thinking in that pretty little head of yours?"
"I-I-" the younger swallowed, adrenaline pumping through his veins. He knew Nick had caught on to what he wanted. Of course he had. Nick could read Charlie like an open book. It felt like he was right there in his bedroom with him.
"Is there something you want from me?" Nick couldn't help his own smirk from appearing on his face, raising an eyebrow at his boyfriend teasingly.
"Stooop," Charlie whined, covering his face with his hands, a nervous giggle escaping his lips.
"I'm just asking a question!" Nick laughed, and Charlie shook his head, still hiding his face. After a moment of silence, Nick leaned in a little. "Charlieee..."
"Do I have to say it?" Charlie asked, finally peaking through his fingers at his boyfriend and trying not to combust.
"I'd love to hear it."
They kept their eyes locked with one another, both of them grinning like idiots. Finally, Charlie let out a long sigh, looking down at his hands.
"I- I want you to..." His voice was barely audible, and Nick chuckled as he trailed off. "What? I'm sorry, you want me to...?"
"You know what." Charlie said playfully exasperated, and Nick crossed his arms over his chest, remaining silent.
Charlie's leg was bouncing under his desk, and he let out another sigh, squirming in his seat. "Iwantyoutotickleme."
"Again?"
He rolled his eyes. "I want you to... tickle me."
"And it finally comes out." Nick leaned back again in his chair, looking at his boyfriend smugly.
"Shut up."
"Oh? You want me to tickle you that badly? You miss me teasing you and playing with you? You miss me making you laugh so hard you can barely breathe? You miss me making you all flustered to the point you can't speak in complete sentences?"
"Shut up!" Charlie squealed, closing his eyes as nervous giggles began pouring out of his mouth. He could almost feel the sensation of Nick poking at him playfully, and it was driving him nuts.
"Oh Char, just you wait until I get back. Because I miss it too. I've nearly gone insane without hearing your adorable laughter. I miss seeing you squirm underneath me. So as soon as I get home, you better be ready. We'll have to make sure my mum isn't home. She'll think I'm murdering you."
"Nicholas, I will hang up on you." Charlie threatened, though by the tone of his voice, Nick knew he wasn't serious. However, he decided to egg him on once more. "Go ahead. That'll just seal your fate even more."
"Ugh, stop!" Charlie grabbed his phone, both boys laughing at this point. "You're impossible!"
"Okay, okay." Nick raised his hands, finally relenting. "You're just too cute to not tease you."
Charlie scoffed, moving to his bed and falling onto his back, his phone raised above him. "You're a menace, you know that?"
"Oh, I know." Nick winked, and Charlie felt his heart flutter in his chest. "Anyways, I have to get going. My family's going to be eating dinner soon. I'll talk to you tomorrow."
"Okay." Charlie felt slightly disappointed. He always hated hanging up with Nick at the end of a call.
Nick must've sensed his change of moods, and his expression softened. "Only a few more days, mon amour." He whispered, and Charlie nodded.
"Only a few more days."
#heartstopper#heartstopper tickle#heartstopper tickle fic#netflix#lgbtq#charlie spring#nick nelson#ler!nick#lee!charlie#teasing#gay#bisexual
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Finding You (Semi Eita x Reader)
Hey All! So this is based off an old idea I had and that actually started my Tumblr. It’s deleted now, but for anyone who remembers that, this is kind of how it ended :)
I waved to some of my teammates, hugs all around while yellow and purple pom poms hung from my bag. For the first time in a little bit, it didn’t feel like one of the shiny smiles I’d alwyas used for dance. This one felt real. My time in America was great, and I’d be back in time for auditions for Laker Girls next year. but For now though?
It’s time to go home.
Immediately after waving to my teammates, I sent a text to my cousin. He was waiting for me in Japan already, having flown in from France a few weeks ago.
Me: Hey! I'm coming home soon :)
I pocketed my phone quickly, my lips tugging into a smile when I felt a buzz against my legs.
Walmart Wonka: Aww, Finally I get to see my favorite person! Me: Oh, I didn't know you finally met up with Ushi-Gushy? Walmart Wonka: That was low. Me: Love u <3
I slid my phone back into my pocket, an excited grin dancing on my lips as music thrummed through my head. Not a huge contrast to when I’d first made this trip, my backpack was filled with memorobellia causing me nostalgia from these four years away from home. Away from my friends, and family. Away from Semi. I hissed as my backpack shifted, the one sharp thing in there poking my back as my fingers were wrapped tight around the handle of a purple suitcase.
As I lifted my suitcase into the overhead compartments, my thoughts drifted right back to a certain grey-haired musician and my cheeks warmed. A dull ache thrummed through my chest. We’d talked over the past few years. A few texts, some errant phone calls every few months. But that pit that had lived in my stomach since I’d left felt like it was slowly finally starting to shrink. I checked my messages, knowing darn well that I wasn't going to have any messages until I landed in Japan. I kept checking anyway.
Only my friend Sophie really came to visit, and Satori was the most updated since he’d call and text me everyday when he woke up, ensuring that I’d remember to take care of myself. I wonder what’s changed. Has Semi changed? I huffed a little in annoyance at the butterflies that still fluttered in my stomach at the thought of not just seeing him,but just him. What if I've changed? If I have changed, will he like it? What if we don't have the same connection we had when I left? In the months before I’d left things were going terribly for me. I’d been evicted, and couldn’t find anywhere to sleep, prioritizing dance over everything else, and completely hyper focused on getting my dance skills intact for Laker Girls auditions.
When I’d ended up on the streets, Satori’d called Semi, and the instant I’d met him, we clicked. The two of us were two peas in a pod, able to talk to almost anything and everything all the way up until the night before I’d left.
When he almost kissed me.
i bit my lip, trying to distract myself from my thoughts until I heard familiar chords in my ears, Semi’s first song with his band floating through my skull.
”I picture you in the center of the sun. I took a pill, but it didn’t help me numb. I think of you, even when my eyes are shut, but I never really know just where to find you…”
"There's my favorite cousin!!" Satori shouted as soon as he saw me, earning multiple weird looks, and a jab to the stomach from me.
“Why are you like this?” I said as he pulled me in for a hug.
“because I missed my baby cousin!” Satori said, wiping fake tears when he pulled away. “Four years since we’ve seen each other in person.” He said, checking over me. “You look okay though. Not malnourished or anything.” I rolled my eyes.
“You absolute drama king.”
“i’m just looking out for my cousin! My little Snickers!” I sighed at the resurgence of that nickname. Every Halloween, without fail when we were little, I would steal everyone’s Snickers, and nothing else. Thus, I was dubbed Snickers by my entire family.
“i haven’t had a snickers in forever…” I sighed, as we walked out of the airport.
“I have some in the car. Well, I hid some in the car. Semi Semi keeps eating them and thinking about you.” I eyed my cousin, immediately averting them when he smirked over at me, his red eyes narrowing as he too looked away. “So… how’s that going?”
”what going?” I asked, instead looking across the parking lot instead of at my cousin.
“you and Semi Semi.” He said, smirking at me.
“oh. It’s not. We aren’t a thing.”
“WHAT? Then what was the point of psychoanalyzing him? We’re going to talk about this at our next therapy session!” He declared, and I gave him an odd glance.
“Therapy?”
“most of the time, Semi doesn’t need therapy, but he tells me he gets the random pangs in his chest since you left.” Satori explained, smirking at me.
i truly hate the hope that bubbles up in my chest at that. But trying to squish it is almost as useless as trying to squish a roach. At least the hope- however scary it is- is a pleasant feeling.
“maybe you should tel him about those pesky feelings of yours.” He mused. My eye twitched in response.
“Get out of my head!” I shouted, while he laughed.
“love you Cuz, you’re not slick. Honestly neither is he.” Satori said with a small shrug as he unlocked the car, and popped the trunk.
“what do you mean, niethr iz he?” I asked, heaving my suitcase into the trunk, and walking around to the drivers side, and remembering something.
“Different sides.” Satori said, as he unlocked the car. My cheeks warmed a little as I walked over to the passenger seat as my cousin tried to convince me that one of my friends, capital FRIENDS liked me the same way I liked him. “The boy wrote you a song!” Satori exclaimed, and I shook my head.
“Right. Except I don’t remember anything about him writing me a song.” I said as he started the car.
“It was with the band. So maybe around two years back?” I tried to go back in my head, and all I could remember was the one single that was in my head.
“no chance. I’ve listened to all his music, and I’ve never heard-“
“He didn’t tell you?” Satori asked, and I rubbed my forehead.
“He told me every time the band released a new song, or that one album.” And every time, I’ve listened to it on repeat.
But Satori doesn’t need to know that last part.
“oh, you’ve heard it then. You just don’t know it.” He said, smirking slightly as I blinked, just ridiculously confused. My eyes then wandered back to the streets of my hometown, and I smiled at views of familiarity.
I sighed, a small nostalgic smile on my face. Same bag and suitcase, some of the same stuff in it with small idiosyncrasies. This time though, it felt like a different me. i just wondered if it was a better me or not. "Semi's still in this building?" I asked, glancing at my nodding cousin, who swung his keys around his index finger a smug smirk on his lips.
Four years... I thought as I walked up the stairs, stomach flipping as I felt a full stair where that chip in the stair used to be.
Four years since I’ve seen this place… I thought as I passed the peeled paint in the stairwell, that still let the faded ugly wallpaper peek through.
Four years since I’ve been here, and yet… somehow, I don’t feel much different… My thoughts turned to only slightly irritating hums as I raised my fist to knock on the familiar wooden door. The anxiety kind of quelled as I spotted the same little sticky note that had somehow stuck to the door frame through all these years. I guess he never moved it.
And finally. That familar smile, the familiar scent of vanilla, the familar heart-stopping eyes of Semi Eita.
"Four years, huh?" His voice sounded the same too. I blinked, a slow smile crawling onto my face. I nodded, dropping my bag on the floor, and opening my arms, as he opened his, letting me back in, almost as if I'd never left.
"Hi Snickers” He whispered into my ear, as I snuggled into his chest, hearing and feeling our hearts skip a beat. “I missed you.”
"I missed you too." After years of talking on the phone, video calls, texts, letters, care packages, and finally I'm back, and I know for sure that, I found him.
Hello all! For my underrated boy, because I love him too <3
Have a great day, and make sure to drink some water!
--Niffler--
#semi eita x female reader#graphics by @saradika_graphics#semi eita x reader#semi eita#semi x reader#Semi x y/n#haikyuu fanfiction#haikyuu x reader#haikyuu semi
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starting o segredo na floresta now, im either gonna finish this in a week or its gonna take months good luck me
update - i love joui
joui, its a little cloudy out, roll for sanity. joe, you stubbed your toe, roll sanity. joui did you just frown???????? roll a sanity test with disadvantage. that was cool joui, you gain 1 sanity. just kidding somewhere in the netherlands a child tripped and scraped their knee, you lose 10 sanity.
i think im going to put my updates under the cut instead of spamming posts B) beware of spoil
UPDATE
if cellbit takes liz or thiago from me ill never forgive him
this bar has to be its own paranormal entity, thiago would have died if the gun had a bullet in it and cristopher nearly got knifed to death in their first fight loll
EP 2
npc thiago about to be the most useless mf ever i swear if he dies to a stray ant or something ill cry just put him in a box for safe keeping
what would i do without the mental image of joui dropkicking every monster he sees
liz why are you finger painting with the ooze monsters remains and why did it give you 1 hp ?????? NEVERMIND
EP 3
RACCOON bro has 8 health but he sure is happy
faz um teste de sanidade
when i said thiago was gonna die to an ant i didnt actually mean kill him with giant spiders
cristopher no please dont climb a tree these are spiders they can climb nah bro cristopher is dead af im gonna miss him. bro cellbit just kill him already bros dead 2 hp
damn
ep 4
at this rate luba doesnt even need to roll sanity we all know hes gonna fail anyways joui's having the worst two days of his life
jesus christ i just woke up i cant handle this shit cesar's punching a hole in my itty bitty heart bones
please stop talking about leticio's cacetinho
EP 5 how long is too long for a tumblr post btw
the starting soon screen replaced cris with arthur notlikethis
cellbit is far too happy about them going to this house i hate it i hate it
i would like for them to leave a casa now :))) they got gregório time to go :) DAMN JOUI JUST GOT STEAMROLLED BY THAT ZOMBIE ROLLED A 99 VS CELLS 1 jesus christ thiago LOL NO WAY GREGÓRIO IS DEAD AF bro was just taking a nap in the car and this is what he gets
that was horribly stressful its 3 am how am i supposed to sleep after that
to be fair, if i was rodolfo and liz didnt use the tazer, i would have just dragged gregório in front of arthur and killed him in right in front of his face soo...
ROLLED 100 LOOOOOOOOOOOOL a caverna
COOL GUY ALERT HOPE HE DOESNT KILL BRULIO HAHAhahaaa
EP 6 I HAVE GREAT ANXIETY THIS MESTRE GUY IS ABOUT TO KILL HALF THE SQUAD
luba i know youve been rolling absolute dog shit the last 5 episodes but this one really counts buddy brulio :(
most stressful hour of youtube ive ever sat through i cant believe they all lived
A PORTA FORTE
EP 7 im so glad they're going back to the house im so happy ive never wanted anything else this is great nothing could go wrong in this house nothing
7 episodes in and ive just now realised that he keeps talking about circles and spirals and those have significance with a certain element and now i want them to leave carpazinha go back home forget this ever happened
undressing with the homies in the haunted basement next to a dead old man
not thiago canonically talking to a bookshelf after complaining about joui's whispering to his shotgun
THIS GRAVE IS SO COMPLICATEDDDD I BET ITS FUCKING EMPTY THEYRE ARGUING ABOUT HOW TO "knock out" AN OLD LADY AND ITS PROBABLY JUST WORMS AT THE BOTTOM OF THE GRAVEEE
this whole graveyard scene has me in tears thiago staring at nothing while they try to get him to unmute, old guy on the phone, joui picking up the old lady i just laughed so hard i feel ill
the one time joui doesnt fail a roll he loses 6 SANITY?? 8 SANITY?????????????? SENHORA VOCE TA BEM????? YOU JUST CHOKED HER OUT JOUI WAIT SHES GONNA DIE??????????? SHES GOING TO DIE???????????? THE GASOLINE IN THE MOUTH??
grounded from the shotgun for 1 week
EP 8
Thiago's pants are still fucked up from last episode btw
about to have a tpk over alchohol poisoning
if cesar survives this campaign hes gonna put as many points possible into forgery
a caverna im goign fuckign crazy the god of tdeath pr spomething is in this cave theyre gonna walk inside trip on a pebble and get eaten by hundreds of tiny cave beetles
Victor is absolutely about to get his face eated by a spider and/or be swallowed by the cave
ok but santo berço looks kinda cool like i would live there
EP 9 he just (re?)released osnf merch but i refuse to be spoiled by absolutely anything ive done so well i will not be tainted by cesar's really cool green on black long sleeve
wait i love the gatekeeper its a shame this town is probably a hallucination and theyre all actually slowly dying in the middle of the forest GIANT COWS I LOVE THE GIANT COWS WITH REGULAR SIZED HEADS
????????????????????????????????FELPS??????????????????????
buttery butter
thiago this is why you should have quit smoking
?????FELPS?????????
EP 10 so if thiago hadnt used the lighter would felps still be alive, probably just would have died later B)
bro joui has got to buy new dice this is crazy
this is gonna be the average 2 star motel experience BRO JUST DABBED ON CESAR liz is about to get bodied by the hallway ghosts this is just like a regular motel HUH UHHHHHHH
no joui kill the hotel guy joui kill the hotel guy joui kill the hotel guy joui kill the hotel guy joui kill the hotel guy joui kill the hotel guy
mom i want to go home i dont want to stay in santo berço anymore jesus christ
EP 11 how am i supposed to just start the next episode after that i think the mental image of brulio beating arthurs skull in is burned into my brain space
sandwich sandwich
i love the giant cows so much i want one GIANT CHICKEN LAY GIANT EGG I LOVE THE GIANT CHICKEN intimidating the human sized pig
EP 12 still thinking about how cellbit thought new zealand was so close to europe, he was so sure of it that he was making me unsure of where i knew new zealand was
both times thiago was played by cellbit some horrific shit happened so with arthur being an npc this episode im prepared for the worst also this starting soon screen is fucking wicked
are you telling me joui's max sanity is now 12 bros been losing it for so long hes stuck like this joui is the "damn, you live like this?" meme
CELLBO ROLEPLAYED TOO HARD HIS HEADSET JOINED AS AN ENEMY AND BEAT HIS SETUP
"that sounds like a book title" bro let the intrusive thought win
baby nidere
no way the cow has been suffering this whole time ill cry
theyre about to rp their way into an angry medieval mob when they get found with the body of the dead gatekeeper B) does santo berço have dungeons, bc if they do thats where theyll be sleeping tonight nvm the gatekeeper has demons inside him sorry joui HUh no way they killed the gatekeeper dude wtf
EP 13 chat's a bit excited to go in the cave guys if anyone reads this what am i supposed to do once i finish this season. what do you mean i just have to go onto desconjuração. what do you mean i have to leave this story behind. please let me keep all the characters in this one.
THE CAVE MAP IS COOOOOOL THE LIGHT MOVES WITH THE MINER everyone struggling to flip their characters 5 mins into the cave made me laugh so hard i had to pause to breathe
I LOVE MOLES DUDE THEYRE SO COOL ok but i dont love this many moles BRO I LOVE MOTHS TOO THIS IS AWESOME wait no i hate bats THIS MOTH IS SUFFERINGGGGG
THE SUCC hes about to kill them all with the Succ out of spite thiago never mock one of cellbit's monsters again ARTHUR ZIUM
door door door door door door door door door door the gatekeeper is alive???
ih arthur nah dude let go of cesar :(((((((((((( gotta hand it to arthur hes survived two of these situations now get it, hand it to him, CAUSE HE LOST HIS FUCKING ARM WTF HIS ARM DETATCH LIKE A LEGO sorry i vote we still kill the gatekeeper just in case just to be safe
EP 14 did cellbit have a past traumatic experience with a vacuum is that why he created the Succ
agatha?????? bro agatha's life sucked big pp
every time cellbit says hes excited for something i grow more afraid
if they kill and eat the gatekeeper would he also taste delicious just wondering
i think i might know the reason why 12 sanity joui has a funky grey form but 55 sanity thiago doesnt, but maybe im crazy nevermind thiago had the funky grey within him this whole time wait does that mean hes gonna die if santo berço dies DAMN
joui just really wants to see thiago naked also hes just blatantly stealing arthur's knife he really is losing all his sanity that was possibly the most unconvincing "nada" ive ever heard
EP 15 before i start a new episode i always go to the vod on twitch and watch the memes first so i can go "hehe" for five minutes, and then go "oh no" for the next 4 hours
hypothetically, if joui managed to get the symbol on him before anyone noticed would he have just lost all 12 of his sanity and gone mad cuz that would have been crazy :,)
this is it cellbit is finally going to kill npc thiago joui is so very happy about his shotgun i thought maybe he was getting better but hes whispering to it again
alright whats up with cellbit and the outwards opening doors because i swear i have never seen a door that opens out instead of in, are all the doors like that in his home these doors are made to have creatures attack from inside ih i just checked like 3 times to make sure i was on the right episode lmaoooo
"pobre martha" DAAAAAAMN MARIANA ICE COLD
one buff woman vs all 3 equipe kelvin who will win (1 woman) crazy that equipe kelvin managed to accomplish what took our group 9 episodes to get to lool they even got the leticio cacetinho dlc, but they did skip the spider boss fight and the entire house level
THE BLACKSMITH IS MIGUEL AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
EP 16 the joui, liz, and arthur cosplay look like theyre going to a nice dinner meanwhile thiago, kenan, and cesar just look homeless
idk if thiago's making it out of this one :,) maybe we just take thiago's weapons its not like he can do much to help anyways kenan wants to skin him listen brother i dont think thats gonna work im at the 52 min mark and cellbit is acting sus af the blacksmith is about to appear and stomp them all or something
joui would roll a 99 and nearly knife cesar and liz is trying so hard not to metagame her way to the explosive backpack loving how trigger happy joui is right now go on guys give him more explosives what the worst that could happen
is kenan also a wellspring do they have to kill him cuz thats gonna be kind of awkward and on that note since thiago has the symbol on him does that make him a wellspring too ill cry i will cry
NOT JOUI APOLOGIZING FOR LYING ABOUT HIS SAMURAI ANCESTRY
damn that scene between joui, liz, and thiago was the best in the entire season
i would like to take this moment before they all get swallowed alive by some horrible sludge tentacle monster to proclaim my absolute hatred of Santo Berço. I know i said at the end of episode 8 that i thought it looked cool but im over it ive moved past that point in my life i hate Santo Berço
BIG GOOEY MEATBALL
"the people are happy here!" says the blacksmith as he currently has 5 people forcefully locked up for decades that have gone mad with probably no way of ever regaining their sanity i just realised miguel and the old blacksmith fucked and had a kid
final boss aboutta come crawling out of the meatball please stop trying to skin thiago the symbol isnt gonna come off
THAT WAS SICK AF THEYRE ALL DEAD AS HELL
???????????????????? "kenan you have one last sane move before i take your character and throw him off a cliff"
:(
post i made after i finished osnf (made like 3 days later because i was so so so so so so so so so so sad)
https://www.tumblr.com/safetyobstacles/739056899257942016/i-finished-osnf-after-almost-2-months-and-you-know?source=share
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dear darling star <3 how are you?
i hope im not bothering you with this message
it’s been a while now and tumblr just doesn’t feel the same without you </3
i hope you’re doing good (both physically and emotionally)
i’ve been out of order lately because my life has been super hectic, so here’s the rundown till now:
i passed the semester with equal parts a’s and b’s (ngl the b’a hurt a bit bc it’s the first time in like 6 years i’ve gotten a b in a class😪 but im just glad that i made it)
my uni friends and i went out drinking to celebrate the semester being over( there were a lot of college students and we felt old af). we got so drunk that it was so weird for me but it was so fun to let loose for the first time in a loooooong time.
we just finished booking everything we needed for lolla and im a bit more excited now.
i’ve also been watching kdramas now (?!?) and im kinda addicted
bittersweet news:
i’ve also been a lot more proactive in donating to help palestine (i still donated monthly b4 but i’ve tried chip in a bit more lately, considering what’s been happening in rafah)
for the not so good news:
two stray cats that we haven’t been able to spay yet gave birth so there’s that. i love kittens, they’re the cutest but i always get so stressed at socializing them and/or finding homes for them because people are irresponsible af with their pets here but i can’t keep taking cats in without my cats and my other financial responsibilities being affected </3 i’ve been kinda guilty for the trip too bc of the money we’ve spent
my dad found a premature newborn kitten and it sadly passed away too </3
and, finally, i’m taking my masters’ comprehensive tests in two weeks and im terrified of failing them (i’ll update when i get the results so 🤞🏻).
i hope you’re doing well, what have you been up to? i hope you’re taking good care of yourself💜
(adding some life pictures too, look at the babies, look at my mom’s big ass piece of pizza and of course, i hope you still drink your iced coffee consistently <3)
i wish you the absolute best, always <3
sending you love wherever your are, whenever you are✨
sincerely,
🐈⬛
My love!!!!!! The love of my actual life. I was just thinking of you because skz posted they would be doing that little kitten interview thing (they did it for us and us only ‼️‼️) I’m so excited we get to see Jisung with kittens 😌
you’re NEVERRRR a bother with your messages. They’re absolutely the best part of all my days and I’ve been thinking of you so often while on my little break from the internet. First I am SO glad to hear you finished with a’s and b’s????? You should be so proud of yourself my love!!!!!! And you went out to celebrate, I hope you had the most fun everrrrrr 🥹🫶
my sister and I just got our lolla wristbands in the mail and it’s all starting to feel so real. I’m excited but also nervous??? As fuck??????? And I still have 2 Ateez shows before then I’ve done absolutely nothing to prepare for 🥲 it’s crunch time when I get back home frfr
also pls send all the kdrama recs as soon as physically possible !!!!!!
I’m so glad to hear you’re able to donate and be of help 🫶 I’ve been continuing to donate to save the children and participating in active boycotts. Tuning into the news every day is just so fucking heartbreaking. I’m so proud of everyone on here doing what they can and donating ❤️🍉 I love you so much
Also FEEL YOU on the kitten thing…. kittens are so so so much work and they stress me out so bad. One of my neighbors at my parents’ house once left behind their cat who gave birth in our shed and we has to care for the last kitten who survived (super tiny little premature baby) and even though we rushed her to the vet and watched after her for a few days, she passed 💔 that was the moment that I remember being like….. kittens are just so much more fragile than people think and difficult to care for. You did the best that you could :( thank you for being there for them regardless.
Also how did the comprehensive test go? (If you already took it) I hope you did so so amazing my love!!!!!!!!
I love you endlessly and I’m thinking of you always. Momo and I are rooting for you (even though she’s with my dad rn) and we hope you’re taking good care of yourself. All my love to you, always always always 💓💞💫🫶 I’ll be back properly very soon and in the meanwhile I’m sending you all my love from the middle of nowhere ! I hope it reaches you
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Back in Action After So Long!
Why, yes, I had to include Bugs for the title of this post. Why not XD
Anyways, this update has been a long time coming!
School has been one reason I've had spurts of activity on this site, but then there's also the fun spurts where my mental health was like a rollercoaster. March in particular was a pretty bad month for me, even though I was creating a lot of content for Super Why and such, because I was bogged down with work and had little to no motivation for school. In April and May, however, I got my crap together, and pushed through to get my GPA back up, albeit not without a lot of coffee, and lots, and I mean LOTS of correction and guidance and prayer! Long story short, work got a little easier in April-May, I was able to create art I was actually proud of, got a confidence boost in my physical appearance, changed my outlook on how I see work and creativity, updated a fic on my list, and got back into an old fandom of mine, while working on other things back and forth. Now, school is still trying to kcik my tail, but I'm right there in the mud wrestling with it, because I feel that this is a dream of mine that I want to pursue, and darn it all if I'm going to fail in it. And before you come after me with pitchforks (I know who you are XD), yes, I have been making sure I take care of myself and get adequate rest, especially during the really tough weeks.
Rediscovering my love of writing, and being reminded (yet again) of the freedom to write what I want and not care what others think, has really helped with my creativity. Recently, I've been getting downloads of absolutely wild ideas, ranging from genderbending twists on romance to ideas that would fit in an anime rather than a kids' show. And I'm loving every minute of it! Learning to have fun with my writing again has been such a liberating experience, and learning to sit back and consume media/take breaks when needed has also been something that I needed to learn. You can expect bigger, better content from me moving forward!
And speaking of bigger, better content, I'm planning on moving some stories over to AO3 and making them exclusive to that website. Stories that are going to be AO3-exclusive include both BT Redux and For Love and Glory Relance, Attero Dominatus, Dimmed Stars, Eclipsed Horizons (my Hanna-Barbera/Honkai Impact story), and POSSIBLY the remaining Super Readers' Biggest Adventure Gaiden series. I've already started cross-posting some stories from both Wattpad and Fanfiction onto my AO3 account, so let's see how it goes from here!
To quote Rocky, I ain't hear no bell! I'm only down and out when God says it's time for me to bow out!
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THIS FUCKING CHAPTER!!!!!!!!! I think this was the chapter that made me rediscover Illicit Affairs because it's the first chapter I commented on 🤣 AND THANK THE LORD I DID bc it led me to u 🥰 LSO? You posted Chapter 1 on Feb 5th...and posted this on Feb 15th. YOU WERE LITERALLY CRAZY FOR THAT!!!! You were constantly updating like every two days 😭 IK you said you barely slept throughout this entire time, but the dedication is unreal. i followed you at some point and i was like holy fuck how does this girl write so fast
I remember feeling so shocked at the end because I wasn't expecting the ending, but also I fucking loved it because the introduction of Neteyam's betrothed made it even angstier. What can I say? I'm a sucker for the man and girl in love but man has a fiance out of duty trope sekfnjkrhgnfdkfnkd it justs so angsty and you never know how its going to play out. absolute genius move and it kept me on my toes until the next chapter.
“I am serious, Angel. You’ve been in my life for as long as I can remember. You have always been the only one to see me for more than just a freak, or a fuck-up, or a disappointment. You see me.”
My poor baby Lo'ak ): I love him so much and I'm so happy he gets his ending happy in The Archer and James' better not play any fucking games next movie. I ALREADY LOST NETEYAM I WILL NOT TAKE ANY ABUSE OR NEGETIVTY TOWARDS LOAK
“Oh… I see.” He was now turning his back to you, trying to leave without looking you in the eye. You were not going to let that happen.
He's definitely caught up on the fact that Atan has this new body and now is his chance to be with the only someone who would mate with him but hang in there Lo ): you will find your person soon'
We were in the backseat, drunk on something stronger than the drinks in the bar…
I rent a place on Cornelia Street, I say casually in the car…”
THIS IS ONE OF MY FAVORITE SCENES IN ILLICIT AFFAIRS LIKE ACTUALLY!!!
“I never did walk Cornelia Street again after that day, you know? I kept my promise.”
THIS QUOTE!!! one of your quotes that has stuck with me since i first saw it! its so vulnerable, but so simple. atan isn't bearing her chest with a long-worded speech, but she is bearing her chest with the comparison of cornelia street, and what it means, to their clearing. cornelia street is one of taylors saddest songs to me but also one of her strongest displays of love.
I was afraid I was going to miss you and no one would be able to let you through the door. It never occurred to me you wouldn’t show - not until the dawn of the next day. That’s when it hit.”
OOOF THATS GOT A KICK!!!! I think almost every girl can relate to this anxiety of waiting for the person they want/love show up for them. it literally makes us go insane! and the hurt and disappointment that comes after they fail to show up ): it's almost like...did that really happen? you question whether they actually did that to you and what it means as a whole. ESPECIALLY ON ATAN'S BIRTHDAY ): yeah i spent my 21st birthday on bad terms with my ex boyfriend and he didn't even wish my a happy birthday and i waited all morning and afternoon for him so say something so this hit a little close to home (my all too well moment LOL?)
“I never had any expectations. I was never delusional enough to think that you would ever choose me. But I did have dreams. And in the dreams, you told me you loved me too, and that whatever it was, we would always be able to work through it together.
NO BECAUSE THIS ENTIRE PARAGRAPH??? I LOVE IT SO MUCH. i don't even know what to say except i love it?? atan's hurt really show through this paragraph ): suffice to say this paragraph is one of my favorites that you've written (yes i have favorites and could easily pinpoint them)
“You heard me. I saw you. I saw you in the forest, his hands all over you, I saw you running your hand up and down his arm. I’ve known he has been sneaking in your tent for weeks. What are you doing with my baby brother in your tent late at night, Y/N?”
Neteyam really is stupid LMFAOOO he didnt even use Atan so thats how you know he's mad
FIVE STAGES OF GRIEF STAGE II: ANGER
*SVU THEME SONG*
I don’t owe you anything. You fucking left, Neteyam! We’re nothing to each other.
GET HIS ASS ATAN!!!!
You felt a sick satisfaction at his demeanour. You made him like this, this angry, nose flared and panted breaths, you had this power over him. Just the thought of you with another man drove him to this point, and you loved it. He deserved it, deserves much worse.
I WOULD BE EATING THIS SHIT UP !!! well i am eating it up but if this was irl.....i would be jumping over the moon with glee
It wasn’t possible for you to finish the sentence, as his lips roughly slammed against yours, and you immediately, as if your body needed no input from your mind, raised your hands to the circle around his neck, pushing him closer to you.
YOU WERE SUCH A TEASE FOR THIS!!!!
The dizziness you felt was more than just a weak headache you could ride out, but a sign your human body was fighting to maintain the neurolink inside the pod. You didn’t have much time.
I'm literally giggling bc i love what's about to come..
The holy grail, injectable morphine. You hastily grabbed a syringe and a needle, measured out the amount needed, shook the syringe to remove any air bubbles, and directed it to your arm, where you injected it in your vein.
NO BC I WAS SHOCKED LIKE MORPHINE???? atan is at a point of desperation that is hard to come back from ): we're about to get dark atan omggggg
“You will tell her by the end of the week, or I will.”
clueless little me still thinking this is about neteyam confessing...i felt validated bc they didn't have a chance to talk so it was like yeah ofc he hasn't confessed they haven't talk but he will soon
There was a lot of pain in your life, but this family would always be your good karma, it seemed.
I love that Atan's bond extends and exists outside of Neteyam!! Like yeah the world doesn't revolve around men..
You knew you were bonded for life, shared a kinship and bond no one could break until one of you died, maybe even after. The feeling of belonging, as you watched 5 other ikran fly alongside yours and help you through your first of many adventures in the sky. You felt grateful and happy to have made it so far before the inevitable end.
ATAN DESERVES ALL THE HAPPINESS IN THE WORLD 😭
“You drive me crazy when you roll your eyes at me, you know? I would kill to be the reason your eyes roll in the back of your head at night.”
hjfnkjjfdbvkjnvjfk HE WAS ACTUALLY BOLD FOR SAYING THAT AND IM JUST REALIZING HIS COMMENT NOW
Oh, it seems much better now than what was described. I guess it’s true what they say, you really are that skilled.” She turned her attention to you and smiled.
“Thank you. I don’t think we’ve properly met.”
“You’re right, my bad! I’m Tiongli. Neteyam’s mate.”
*EVIL LAUGHTER* you really are something andra because THIS CAUGHT ME SOOO OFF GUARD I SWEAR!!! i just love this trope so much and i cant believe you included it. I FULLY THOUGHT THIS WOULD BE A SIMPLE HAPPY ENDING this is the first time where i was like oh the author is sadistic (hence why i commented). i wAS APPALLED I WAS SHOCKED I WAS MOVED i mean this is the chapter and reveal that cemented me as an illicit affairs stan. i was like yup okay now i have to see how this plays out and i have to follow the author because i need to finish this. IT JUST AMAZING!!!!!
OAKY i finished this at 1:30 AM oops. I AM SO EXCITED TO ANNOTATE THE REMAINING THREE CHAPTERS!!!! LIKE JUMPING OVER THE MOON BC THEY ARE MY FAVORITE!!!! im definitely going to dedicate some time next weekend so i can sit down and FULLY get into the last three chapters bc they will have a lot of annotations and it will get serious. i'll start earlier next time though hehehe anyway cant wait to hear back from you...also sorry babe i know i have annotated five chapters within week and you are busy so pls take your time responding if you need to <3 i thought i would have more notes on this chapter but i think i was just so excited for the end i didn't leave any notes on any of the rites of passage scenes but know i did love those too. OKAY GOODNIGHT!!!
Illicit Affairs | Chapter VII: Hoax
Pairing: Neteyam x Human/Avatar!Reader
Chapter I Chapter II Chapter III Chapter IV Chapter V Chapter VI Chapter VIII Chapter IX Chapter X
Synopsis: Tensions erupt when Neteyam confronts you about something he saw. His secret comes out at the worst time, leaving you both in pieces.
Warnings: (a little) smut (18+, Minors DNI), angst, mentions of blood mentions of death, injury, pills, pill addiction, opioid addiction, disease, cursing, some fluff + all the feels.
Word Count: 9,5k words (holy mother)
A/N: This is it, guys! Where tensions explode and secrets come come out, hearts are bound to be broken. I hope you enjoy this chapter, I put everything into it. I cried whilst writing it, I laughed whilst writing it, pretty sure I experienced the full spectrum of human emotions whilst doing this. Also, I have ignored my actual work to finish it, so if I fail my annual progression review, at least it would have been worth it. Let me know what you think, and as always, thank you for everyone who is reading is and asked to be tagged <;3
"My only one, my kingdom come undone My broken drum, you have beaten my heart Don't want no other shade of blue, but you No other sadness in the world would do"
“There are perks with being an Omatikaya, you know? You can make your bow out of the wood of the Home Tree… and you can choose a mate.”
Fuck.
“Lo’ak… be serious.”
“I am serious, Angel. You’ve been in my life for as long as I can remember. You have always been the only one to see me for more than just a freak, or a fuck-up, or a disappointment. You see me.”
The younger Sully boy gently cupped you face in his hand; he was caressing your cheek with his thumb. Using a little force, he willed your face upwards so you could look up at his face; you were surprised to see the intensity in his eyes.
You placed your hand on his arm, and you hoped by slowly massaging it, it would relax him enough to soften your following words.
“Lo’ak… I do see you. You are an incredible person. You have been there for me my whole life, and I will be forever grateful to you. You have been the only one who constantly chose the dark stuffy lab to the beauty of this world because the labs had me in it, you were closest to my mum and she loved you like you were her own. I think you are the most amazing guy there is and I think your mate will be the luckiest girl there is. But that’s not me, Lo’ak. You know that can’t be me.”
His hand dropped from your face and both of his hands took yours in them, squeezing them ardently.
“But it is you. It has to be you.”
“Kehe (no). Lo’ak, you are my best friend. I am your best friend. I love you so much, and I know you love me too, but the love we have for each other is not the kind of love one needs to be mated for life.”
You spoke softly, looking at him pleadingly, hoping that he would understand your words in the way that you intend them. You can see his gaze drop and form deflate, being replaced by a meek one, a shadow of his former self.
“Oh… I see.” He was now turning his back to you, trying to leave without looking you in the eye. You were not going to let that happen.
“I’m not letting you leave.” You say, keeping his hands tightened in yours. “We will talk about this, and you will recognise I am right.”
Neteyam was having trouble seeing as he was manoeuvring his way through the forest. He felt sick to his stomach and every heartbeat sent waves of hurt through his entire body, like shards of glass gutting him from inside out. How could his own brother do this? How could you do this? He has spent more than two months with you, every day, sending touches and glances your way that were begging to be seen, begging to be acknowledged. He secretly prayed that you would call him out on it, give him a reason to finally tell you that he’s loved you since he was 10 and yearned for your touch since the second his eyes fell on you again after a whole year apart. He wanted you to finally give him a reason to tell everyone to fuck off and let him finally live his life by his own rules, with you by his side.
Neteyam was shaking with tempestuous fury at the unfairness of it all. Lo’ak will always get everything just handed to him on a silver platter, won’t he? Freedom, to make his own choices, to live his life as he wished, carelessly and devoid of any forethought or responsibility. And now he got you, the woman of his dreams - and nightmares - and the future he used to fantasise would one day be his.
His legs were moving without any conscious input from his mind, and before long, he found himself on the way to the clearing you and him used to go to all the time. Your place, just for his and your eyes to see, just for his and your hearts to experience. As he was nearing, he heard soft sounds emerging from the spot, and he slowly, carefully approached with a bow at the ready and all his senses heightened.
“We were in the backseat, drunk on something stronger than the drinks in the bar…
I rent a place on Cornelia Street, I say casually in the car…”
Soft strumming and the most beautiful voice he has ever heard, a voice that he would recognise anywhere, for the rest of time, made him drop the bow he was gripping tightly. That song, Neteyam thought with a wince, and let himself remember.
“This piece of heaven is our Cornelia Street.”
“What’s Cornelia Street?”
“Well, it’s a place back on Earth where one of her houses used to be, but in this case, it’s a metaphor. Cornelia Street is to them what this clearing is to us.”
A month before your 17th birthday is the last day Neteyam saw you. He was coming to say goodbye. You didn’t know that, and, in your enthusiasm at seeing him after such a long time because of his training, or so he told you, you suggested coming here. Neteyam remembers everything about that day. He didn’t sleep that night, cried himself to sleep quietly in his family’s tent thinking of the possibility of not seeing you again, for a long time, perhaps forever. He had decided that his mum was right. Being around you was hurting you both, and maybe by leaving, both of you could heal and move on. He wouldn’t have to live with causing you more pain than you already had to deal with, and you wouldn’t have to go outside, something that you were only doing for him, it seemed. It was a win-win, he thought, and yet his heart was torn apart, coming apart at the seams of wounds that barely healed.
You were sitting on the ground, resting your back on a rock by the river bank, with the same guitar in your hands you have had since you were young. Neteyam thought he probably heard thousands of songs being played on that guitar, countless hours laying just like he was now, hearing you sing. He did not like humans, could not understand them, their world, their traditions, their beliefs, but watching you strum that guitar and singing about your love, a love neither of you could ever say out loud except in this way, he realised humans did some things right. Humanity did you right.
“We were a fresh page on the desk, filling in the blanks as we go
As if the street lights pointed in an arrowhead, leading us home”
Neteyam watched you intently, and was trying to assimilate the lyrics as best he could, knowing this was always your preferred method of communication, knowing that through these songs you are confessing your true, buried desires. You looked at him as you sang, giving him a big smile.
“And I hope I never lose you, hope it never ends
I'd never walk Cornelia Street again
That's the kind of heartbreak time could never mend
I'd never walk Cornelia Street again”
A year and a half later, inhabiting a new body, you were not smiling anymore as you were playing this, the strumming on the guitar slower and more sorrowful, and your voice sounded hoarse, like you had been crying. Neteyam couldn’t believe that you would come here, in his and your secret place and sing the song you silently confessed your feelings to, after what he saw. He felt his anger poison his body, as his heart picked up pace and made his heartbeat ring painfully in his ears, muffling the sound of your voice.
“I never did walk Cornelia Street again after that day, you know? I kept my promise.”
Neteyam freezes in place, a shocked expression marring his features. You heard him, even with your back to him, even while playing and with the soft hum of the river to dull your senses, you knew. Felt him, his presence that charged this clearing like the air before lighting strike. He, however, does not seem to hear the hint of sadness in your voice, nor the sniffling that accompanies it.
“It took me a while to figure out you weren’t going to come back. It did not dawn on me right away. I thought you were just training hard, as you had been for years at that point, I didn’t think anything of it. I only figured it out a month after I played you this song, when my birthday came and you didn’t show. I waited all day. Way past eclipse, way past the point everyone else was gone and sleeping peacefully, I waited. I didn’t sleep that night. I was afraid I was going to miss you and no one would be able to let you through the door. It never occurred to me you wouldn’t show - not until the dawn of the next day. That’s when it hit.”
“I remember singing you this song, I was terrified. I mean, we talked around it all of our lives, I sang you songs, and I read you poems, and you’d sleep in my bed and let me attach myself to you in a way no friend ever would. But this song, I thought, would be the one. The one that would make us finally have to talk through it. The night before, I had watched an episode of Gilmore Girls, right? And it’s that episode when Dean pitches up at Rory’s school after she drops him hints that she’s in love with him, and he gets mad for one reason or another and then she screams at him “I love you, you idiot!”. And he drops all the stuff he was holding and rushes to her and kisses her, like really kisses her. And I remember thinking, I’m going to sing you this song, and this will be my “I love you, you idiot” moment.”
Neteyam walked slowly towards your form that was still turned around from him, and felt two forces tugging at him, ripping him apart. On one hand, there was the rage, and jealousy, the monster that wanted to scream at you, to hurt you for breaking his heart without even acknowledging it. On the other, there was deep sadness and grief, for the new information that he is receiving, for knowing what this meant to you, what he did to you, how he left you the day that you confessed, how that only strengthened his resolve. He didn’t know which was going to win.
“I never had any expectations. I was never delusional enough to think that you would ever choose me. But I did have dreams. And in the dreams, you told me you loved me too, and that whatever it was, we would always be able to work through it together. That day after my birthday, I felt like something ripped apart in me that I’ve never recovered from. I’ve lost so much of myself throughout the years, every time something new came up. I’ve been in pieces, broken and shattered, my whole life, and yet somehow you managed to walk away with the biggest piece. Because I could never put you in a drawer at the bottom of my desk, like all my other pieces. You were never truly gone, you were just far enough that I could never reach you, but near enough that I could never heal. I mourned you, mourned the me that you took with you, every day for months. Losing you broke me, Neteyam. You broke me. I will never forgive you for that night.”
“Well I guess we’re both fucking disappointed with each other then.”
Neteyam saw you shoulders hunch even more than they were and your head bow towards the ground. You hand raised to your cheeks and wiped something off your face, before you finally stood up and and turned around, facing him. Neteyam’s breath caught in his throat at the new sight. Your eyes were puffy and red, and tears marked your cheeks, so pronounced it was as if they would stain your face forever.
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
He felt his own tears threatening to spill then, pricking at his eyes painfully, begging to be released. There was so much pain inside of him, pain you caused him, pain for the hurt he knew he caused you, pain that felt like it will never diminish.
“You’re sitting here, talking about that night and this song, in this place that once meant so much to us, after giving yourself to another man, to my fucking brother, and you want me to feel bad?”
He saw your face slowly register his words, as if you were mulling over every word carefully, turning it in your mind, and saw how your face went from sad to cold and unflinching and a shiver ran down his spine. You rose an eyebrow at him, an expression only he seemed to have the power to coax out of you.
“What did you just say?”
“You heard me. I saw you. I saw you in the forest, his hands all over you, I saw you running your hand up and down his arm. I’ve known he has been sneaking in your tent for weeks. What are you doing with my baby brother in your tent late at night, Y/N?”
FIVE STAGES OF GRIEF STAGE II: ANGER
“You honestly have some fucking nerve, Neteyam.”
“You do not get to come here, come to this place, or any place for that matter and demand an explanation from me. I don’t owe you anything. You fucking left, Neteyam! We’re nothing to each other. Whatever claim or right you might have had once to ask anything of me or from me is long gone.”
Neteyam stalked towards where you were standing, your words echoing in his mind. He was mad, mad at you for what you did, but also mad at himself. Because he knew you were right. He had no right to come here after abandoning you and the relationship you two had and be angry that you moved on. And yet he was.
He was so close to you now he could feel your breath fanning over his face as you looked up at him, panting with anger, lips slightly opened. He couldn’t help look at them, those lips he has dreamed about for years, the way they’d feel on him, their taste… your taste. It was driving him insane, being so close to you, knowing what he knew.
“Why? Why Lo’ak? You could have picked anyone else.”
You chuckled bitterly. “Really? So if I picked Akoa or Tärze, you wouldn’t be here right now, wouldn’t be mad and looking at me like somehow I betrayed you?”
“Or is it possible it doesn’t actually matter who it is, it’s not the fact that it’s Lo’ak… it’s the fact it’s not you.”
“You see, I think deep down you know it should have been you. I think deep down it kills you that you are not in my tent late at night. You’re not the one that gets to touch me.” he felt your hand place over his bare chest and run it down his abdomen until it reached his red loin cloth, which you slightly tugged at. He felt his cock twitch in response.
You don’t know what came over you. You came here to mourn, still reeling after your conversation with Lo’ak. You never expected to see him here, hear his presence while you sang the song that once signified hope and love, and now is just a bitter reminder of all you’ve lost. You definitely never expected him to question you over Lo’ak, or be so angry over something that would never happen anyway.
You were furious with him, furious that he never told you how he felt for you, and now he was clearly showing it to you by his displays of anger and jealousy. This was not how this was supposed to go.
You felt a sick satisfaction at his demeanour. You made him like this, this angry, nose flared and panted breaths, you had this power over him. Just the thought of you with another man drove him to this point, and you loved it. He deserved it, deserves much worse.
“You should leave, Neteyam.”
You started turning your back to him, but he took hold of your arm and kept you in place forcefully. His other hand went to your neck, and you felt him wrapping his hand around it and squeezing.
“No.”
You were shocked at his actions, and even more shocked at the immediate reaction your body had to him. You felt throbbing deep within you, and squeezed your thighs tightly together to accommodate for the feeling.
“I’m not leaving until you tell me. Did you fuck my brother, Atan (light)?”
He was still squeezing your throat, and you felt your pulse quickening when he moved and took a hold of you jaw, forcing you to look in his eyes. He looked mad, sad, desperate for an answer that would either mend or break him. You felt his intense stare in every cell in your body and felt yourself clench around nothing.
You wanted to lie, wanted to see him suffer at least some of the hurt he’s caused you. But you couldn’t, not with how he was looking at you, not with how he was holding you.
“Fuck you, Neteyam. I would never do that. Fuck you for thinking for a second that something like would ever even cross my mi-“
It wasn’t possible for you to finish the sentence, as his lips roughly slammed against yours, and you immediately, as if your body needed no input from your mind, raised your hands to the circle around his neck, pushing him closer to you.
You moaned into the kiss, and the sound removed any ounce of sanity or self-discipline from his being, and he opened his mouth to deepen the kiss and slide his tongue over your bottom lip, begging for permission.
He felt his hand drop back around your throat, squeezing, loving the feel of your quickened pulse, knowing he was responsible for it, for your swollen lips and dilated pupils, for the way you were squeezing your thighs together. You were his, to love, to touch, to do whatever he wanted to.
He was so hard now, his loincloth was constricting around him painfully, and he knew if he kept going, he was not going to able to stop himself until you were writhing underneath him, until he made you beg and scream his name over and over, all night long.
“Pathfinder, this is Devil Dog, come in, over.”
Fuck.
Your body ached at the loss of contact, as Neteyam removed his hand from around your throat and his lips from your own. He was panting, and tried to steady himself before he touched the little button on the radio on his neck, sighing deeply.
“I’m here, Devil Dog. What’s your post? Over.”
You turned your back to him, and took a few steps towards the river, trying to compose yourself. What the fuck did I just do? This was bad, for so many reasons, it was making you dizzy just counting them all. You couldn’t hear what Jake was saying to Neteyam, but it couldn’t have been good, it was very rare Jake would use the radio to communicate with his kids, you’ve only seen it once when there was a hunting accident that needed everyone’s attention.
“You need to get back to the village, now. We have a situation. If Y/N is with you, bring her back, too. Over and out.”
Shit, this can’t be good, Neteyam thought to himself. He looked over at you and saw you turned your back to him, hiding. You were good at that, pretending, denying, avoiding. Pushing your feelings aside was your favourite defence mechanism, had been ever since your mum died.
His eyes softened and he felt stupid for having doubted you, for spending so many weeks losing sleep over something that never even happened. Guilt also immediately pooled in his gut from the kiss, the confession, the implications of it, all of which things he would have to deal with sooner or later. The horror at the thought of the consequences of his actions made his skin crawl, but he didn’t have too much time to dwell on it, knowing his dad expected them to hurry.
“Hey… we have to get back, dad said to meet him in the village.”
You nodded weakly in his direction, and started making your way towards the village. Once again, he found himself having to clasp your arm by your wrist and turn you around so you could face him. You refused to look at him, so he cupped your face in his hand and raised you head gently so you could look at him. His thumb was ghosting over your lips, that were still swollen and when his eyes met yours, he saw a sadness so deep it made Pandora’s oceans feel like shallow pools.
“We need to talk, properly talk.”
You just nodded silently and removed his hand from your face, and the last thing he saw was your back, walking away.
You were deep in thought as you arrived in the village, and were pulled out of your musings when you saw a big commotion happening all around you. You have never seen the village like this.
There was a crowd of people by the big bonfire, so that’s where you and Neteyam figured to look first.
“…and no matter what comes next, we will stand and fight, together!” You heard big screams and ululating as Jake’s voice boomed throughout the village, above all the noise.
You saw Norm and Max, all the humans and avatars on the right of the Olo’yektan. On his left stood Mo’at, Neytiri and all their children, plus Spider. Lo’ak was screaming and beating his chest, whilst Kiri looked concerned, and Tuk was almost crying, with a tight grip on her mum’s hand. You made your way through the mass of people, reaching the foot of the large tree stump acting like a platform. Jake spotted you and helped you up, and you saw Neteyam following you from the corner of your eye.
Since the speech was done, people started dissipating, and Jake turned his attention to the pair of you.
“Last night, Neytiri and I spotted a star in the night sky that shone brighter than it ever had before.”
Panic rose in your chest at his words, words that you knew could only mean one thing. “The humans are returning.” you said, meekly.
Jake nodded in your direction with anger flashing across his face, before he composed himself.
“We knew this day was coming, but it is definitely different when it is finally happening than the image you had in your head.” you heard Norm pitch in from somewhere behind Jake.
“How long?” Neteyam asked.
“About a week?” Max said, and the man with such a kind and gentle face was scared, you realised sadly. Everyone was scared.
“Fuck.” Neteyam’s face was unreadable. The war he trained all his life for was finally on his doorstep.
“I need you to complete your Iknimaya before then. Tomorrow, you will go perform your first kill. You are more than ready. It’s time. When the humans come, I need you with me. With us.”
You couldn’t swallow the lump that has formed in your throat enough to speak, so you just nodded. You were not ready. The last time you were on an Ikran, you almost died. You felt the phantom pain on your left leg flare up, and you were terrified at the prospect of another flashback triggering as you were fighting for your life on top of the Hallelujah mountains, trying to make the bond.
The crowd eventually dispersed and everybody went back to their homes. There was a heaviness in the air, no smiles or singing tonight, no communal dinner where people animatedly exchange stories and anecdotes; you saw Na’vi hugging their loved ones, keeping them close at all times, as if letting go would mean letting go forever. The war was upon you, and with it, the possibility of loss and grief settled in the bones of every one of the villagers.
You felt sick to your stomach. A shiver ran through your entire body, and, at the weakness that enveloped your being suddenly, you knew the effects of all the pills you took to mitigate your symptoms have worn off. The dizziness you felt was more than just a weak headache you could ride out, but a sign your human body was fighting to maintain the neurolink inside the pod. You didn’t have much time.
“I’m gonna go to bed. See you all tomorrow.” You needed to be in your tent when you passed out, otherwise it would raise suspicion immediately and you couldn’t afford that.
“Hey, you can’t leave. We still need to talk.” Neteyam said, lightly tugging at your arm.
“Not today, Neteyam.” You removed your limb from his grasp and left without giving him a second look.
You were pulled out of the linkpod quite violently by your own body recoiling in agony. You felt a stupid ping of gratefulness at the fact that, although due to horrible news, at least no one was in the lab or adjacent hubs at the current moment. You struggled to get up, and found the walk back to your room excruciating, like no matter how much you walked, it was not anywhere in sight. When you arrived, you went straight to the bathroom and barely managed to make it to the toilet before throwing up, your body violently convulsing in on itself, trying to expel everything from your body. You haven’t had a proper meal in this body in months, so all your body was managing to get rid of was bile, bitter and acidic on your tongue.
When you were done, you pushed your body weakly towards the sink, and gargled the bad taste away with some water and mouth wash. You peered up at the mirror, and were alarmed by the face that met your gaze. You barely recognised yourself. Your face looked ghastly, the palest you have ever been, the hollows of your cheeks looking like pits of shadows and darkness.
Your under-eye bags gave away how little sleep you were actually functioning under, how little rest you actually got in the last few months. You looked truly sick, although you didn’t know how much of that was the virus and how much it was just you… ignoring your body like you ignored everything that you had to work through, everything that required healing and spiritual effort, and trading it for a easy-to-digest fantasy.
You made your way towards your bed limply and was comforted by the bottles of pills you saw on your bedside table, that will provide fleeting relief. You passed out on the bed soon after, happy that the suffering could be over for at least some hours.
You woke up a couple of hours before dawn, with a raging fever and chills running up and down your spine, and instead of struggling back to sleep, you got up slowly and put some clothes on, making your way towards the labs. Today was an important day, and you needed to be focused for it, you couldn’t afford the same thing as yesterday take place. In the medical ward, you scrambled in the drawers until you found what you were searching for. The holy grail, injectable morphine. You hastily grabbed a syringe and a needle, measured out the amount needed, shook the syringe to remove any air bubbles, and directed it to your arm, where you injected it in your vein. Placebo effect or not, you felt immediate relief, and you knew this would put you through the day.
Norm came to the linkpod to help with the neurolink, and he gave you a worried look as he watched you settle in.
“I think you should be taking a break from this.”
“Are you serious right now? The humans are literally circling the atmosphere as we speak, I can’t afford to take breaks now, you know this.”
“What I know is that you look about a week away from collapsing in my arms, and your Avatar won’t work without you, Ace. You’re always in the village, and you don’t sleep. You’re always running experiments when you are here. Look, I love your enthusiasm, and I love that you’ve finally getting outside and enjoying your life, but there’s also too much of a good thing.”
You were started to feel anger pick at your brain, much like the virus you were carrying with you everywhere you went.
“You made this for me. You made me this Avatar. You guilt tripped me into taking it. Now you’re unhappy I’m using the Avatar. Why don’t you make up your mind and let me know, Norm? In the meantime, I have to go.”
You lay in the on the pod and placed the metal frame on top of your body, and you couldn’t miss the tear that fell on Norm’s face as he closed the lid of the pod.
It was still before dawn when your consciousness woke up in the blue body you’ve come to love so much, and you couldn’t help feel immense guilt at the words you spat at Norm. He doesn’t deserve any of this; he has been a surrogate uncle for you ever since you were born. He made you an Avatar, he built you a guitar. He helped you go outside and live your life, he was always there for you if you needed to talk, or vent. He has always believed in you, in your capacity to help, to do good, to overcome your grief. You would have to apologise to him come nighttime.
You saw Jake make his way to you as you opened the flap to your tent. “Hi, kid.” Tensions were running high, you could tell, as Jake did not smile or make light conversation, as he always tended to do. He would always take the time to check in, to make sure you are doing well, which you appreciated massively. You loved having him and the rest of the family around. It felt like you belonged, for the first time in your life.
“So you, Neteyam, Akoa and Heesu will go and they will watch you perform your first kill. Early tomorrow, we will go take the Iknimaya, and then you will be able to join Neteyam on raids and scouting. How’s that sound?”
“Sounds good, boss.” You saw him crack a tiny smile at that, and felt better you could still make him smile, even in these circumstances.
Neteyam came out of the tent looking… so good it made your mouth fill with saliva. He was holding his bow tightly in his hands, and he was adorning new jewellery, you noted. A beautiful black necklace, filled with beads and impressive craftsmanship, his red and green cummerbund tightly wrapped around his ribcage, and his knife tucked on his hip, all came together to bring about Neteyam Te Sulli Tsyeyk’itan, the future leader of the Omaticaya. But what really drew your eye, was a bracelet. A green bracelet that he kept around his arm, whose every bead and stone was imprinted in your mind, for the rest of time. Why was he wearing that bracelet, why now? What was he trying to tell you?
Neteyam found his gaze drawn to the girl next to his dad, the only girl that existed, as far as he was concerned. He barely slept last night thinking of you, of that kiss, of your confession, of the song, and he knew he had to make it right sooner rather than later. The humans were coming, not one of them knew what their lives were going to look like in a few weeks, and there was so much to set straight, the thought made him nauseated again. He had to tell you. Your eyes found his and he saw many emotions passing through them, and was happy to see at least one of them was passion, and yearning. You looked at him like you wanted to do things Eywa would disapprove of, and he felt himself twitch in pain for what felt like the millionth time recently.
Neteyam led the pack away from the village and towards the forest where you would have to make your first kill. He had no doubt in his mind you would do well, he honestly doesn’t know why it has taken so long to do it to begin with. You’ve been ready for weeks. After stalking quietly through the forest for a couple of hours, you found a herd of Yerik. Neteyam closed his gap on you and placed a hand on your back, smiling to himself at the way you shuddered when he did.
“You’ve got this. We’ve been through this and you are ready. Remember, keep a knee on the ground for support. Good luck.”
You nodded without looking at him, eyes plastered on one of the animals peacefully grazing on a bush. He saw you, focused and determined, aiming the arrow with precision and power, and he knew then you were made for this. You were made to be here, as one of the people, you were meant to be Na’vi.
You made quick work of the kill, and immediately got up from your crouched stance and made your way to the now fatally injured Yerik. You removed your knife from where it was placed on your chest, and repeated the words he taught you weeks ago. “Oel ngati kameie, ma tsmukan, ulte ngaru seiyi irayo (I See you, Brother, and thank you). Ngari hu Eywa salew tirea, tokx 'ì'awn slu Na'viyä hapxì (Your spirit goes with Eywa, your body stays behind to become part of the People).”
Perfect, just like he knew you would do. You were nervous, he noted, but you also seemed happy to have finally done it, after all this time training. All four of you made your way back to the village, the two men accompanying you carrying the animal by its legs. Neteyam wanted to talk to you, wanted to get you alone so he can finally tell you all the things he had to say, that he needed to say, the secret that has plagued him for weeks and that drove a wedge between him and his baby brother. Unfortunately, it seems like the universe fated you to never be alone with him again. Right after you arrived at the village, Jake took all of you to gun practice and through strategy meetings about how to plan an attack once the Sky People decelerated. Those lasted the whole day, and before he knew it, you left to your tent again, leaving him to deal with his dad on his own.
“Neteyam. Stay, I want to talk to you.”
“Yes, Senpul (dad)?”
“Did you tell her yet?”
“Not yet. I’m trying to find some time, but it seems like we are never together alone anymore.”
Neteyam saw his dad sighing heavily and was scared for the hell he knew would rain down on him sooner or later.
“Neteyam, you have to tell her. You have asked us to keep your secret, and we have. We have all participated in this, and I am getting tired of lying for you. The kids don’t want to lie to her anymore, your mother doesn’t want for this to be a secret anymore. She deserves to know.”
“You will tell her by the end of the week, or I will.”
Your body convulsed as your mind woke up in your human form, and you tried to hide it as best as you could so whoever was helping you get disconnected wouldn’t notice. To your disappointment, it was Max.
“Hey, sweetheart. How was it today?”
“Good, made the first kill. Going up the Iknimaya tomorrow, which can’t say I am particularly excited about.”
“Oh, honey, you shouldn’t worry about it. It’s going to be completely different than that dreadful day. You are going to be able to control it, you will be connected to it. Plus Toruk has never been spotted this close to the banshee rookery, so there will be nothing making your Ikran nervous.”
“Yeah, guess you are right.” You said, not wanting to tell Max that rationalising it doesn’t achieve anything except making you feel stupid for being scared. “Where’s Norm?”
Max looked agitated for a second, but tried to compose himself enough to appear nonchalant about the subject. “Um, I think he’s in his room, he told me he wants to read this book he still hasn’t gotten around to, if you can believe that. He's been here for almost 19 years, you’d think there’s be nothing new to do here anymore.”
You hoped you weren’t as bad a liar as seemingly everyone you have come across recently, otherwise your illness is not as much of a secret as you’d hoped.
“He told you.”
“Yeah…”
“I was such a dick. I have to apologise. I’ll go find him.”
“Maybe give him some time? He looked really upset, and I think he just needs to lick his wounds by himself for a while.”
“I didn’t mean it, Max. I am just tired and stressed because of the Iknimaya and the humans returning, not that that’s any excuse.”
“I know, honey. He will be alright, just give it time. Time heals everything.”
You could only pray that was the case, for Norm….and for yourself.
You woke up the next morning groggy, feeling sick from your illness and sick from all the pills you ingested last night. If this was starting to be a problem, it was a problem you were gonna have to deal with later. Pandora’s box can hold a couple more issues for the time being. You made your way quietly to the medical ward and found the morphine vial you used yesterday. Withdrawing a few more millilitres, you injected yourself in the arm with it, instant relief flooding your system. You sighed happily and thought this was probably the closest you’ve ever gotten to feeling euphoric.
Your Avatar body looked ready to tackle the Iknimaya, in all new garbs and a new necklace that Kiri made for you recently, as well as Lo’ak’s visors. Tuk and Neytiri were braiding your hair fresh, so you were all ready to go by the end of the eclipse. Feeling how nervous you were, Neytiri put her hand on your heart, and looked into your eyes and she placed the last feather in your hair.
“It will be alright, ma 'ite. You have done better than any other Dream Walker ever has. Even better than the Toruk Makto. I know you are scared because of what happened in the past, but you have grown so much since then. You are such a special child, a gift from Eywa. There’s light in you no darkness can snuff out, and you were made to be one of us. Do not worry.”
You let out a small cry and hugged the woman that could have been your mother in these 9 years after you lost your own, who has loved you and protected you every chance she got, that wanted to take you in the village and raise you as one of the people, but who you pushed away out of fear, out of terror at the possibility of more loss, more pain. She never held a grudge, she never turned her back on you, even after shunning them from your life, she understood you and welcomed you back with open arms as soon as you felt ready to join them. She saw you. You will never be able to repay her kindness.
“We’ll be with you. Kiri and I will fly and bring Tuk on one of our Ikrans. Spider, Lo’ak, Neteyam and Jake will come on their Pa’li with you and make the climb. It will be good practice for them. We all want to celebrate with you. We can all join you on your first flight, so this way it will be less scary.”
You were fully crying in the crook of her neck now, unable to believe the luck you had to having been born somewhere where the Sullys existed at the same time. There was a lot of pain in your life, but this family would always be your good karma, it seemed.
The climb was the most excruciating thing you have ever had to do. Every muscle in your body was pushed to its limits, and you were beginning to wonder how you were supposed to fight a huge animal after all of this. You understand now this is why this was the ultimate test of becoming a hunter, and why there were not many hunters in the Omatikaya. The thought brought a gust of confidence to your mind - you were doing this. You. You’ve gotten so far, further than any scientist on Pandora ever has. You grew up in a lab with severe agoraphobia and unsolved trauma and you still made it here. You will do this, because you have to. Because you’ve come so far.
It was taking every ounce of discipline to not continuously stop and stare at the beauty of the Hallelujah mountains, that you have heard so much about, but never experienced for yourself, and you realised you needed to swallow often to compensate for the dryness you felt from your mouth being stuck agape in awe at the beauteous miracle.
You found yourself peering up at Neteyam frequently throughout the climb, and thoughts about yesterday made your already drugged-out mind even airier. There was so much to think about, so much to talk about, but you couldn’t handle it right now. You couldn’t handle the consequences of that kiss and the hurt that would inevitably emerge from your star-crossed fate. You were dying. Although you didn’t want to think about it, didn’t want to acknowledge the reality that your body was falling apart in front of you, it was happening. You probably had another couple of weeks before your heart gave out from all the strain the virus was putting on your whole body, just like it happened with all the other victims.
As if he could feel you, Neteyam turned around and gave you a nervous look. You wondered what he thought of everything, how he felt. Was he happy about the kiss? Did he regret it? In his defence, he has been wanting to talk to you for days and you avoided him, unable to deal with him at the moment. He will just have to be another trinket in the Pandora’s box until you finished the Iknimaya. Making it to a large suspended boulder before you, he stretched out a strong arm for you, and you took it, happy to have at least some physical contact between you. His touch has always calmed your nerves, from when you were children, and now, as adults, that still hasn’t changed.
He didn’t let go once you climbed next to him. Taking advantage of the fact you two were the last to climb, he took hold of your arm with one hand, and placed the other on your face, cupping it gently. His thumb found its way to your lips again, caressing them softly and you felt intoxicated from his touch. He brought his face close to yours and brought your foreheads together, breathing you in. You stood like this, staring at each other for a while, and it was like all the words you wanted to say to each other were spoken wordlessly. I love you. I see you. I’m sorry.
“Are you guys coming or what?” You heard Spider screaming from a higher up boulder, and you reluctantly let go. He squeezed your arm one more time, and then motioned for you to climb in front of him. You weren’t far off now, you realised, and felt your heart picking up pace in your ribcage.
Soon enough, you were there. You could hear thousands of banshees screaming and cooing, and you thought it was mirroring your internal dialogue quite well, loud and incoherent. Neteyam held a hand in front of your body as you made your way across a narrow ledge behind a waterfall, that connected the cave to the banshee nest.
“Ok, kid. This is it. Are you ready?” Jake began speaking and you were trying to focus on him instead of the panicked feeling rising in your chest.
As you were preparing to respond, you heard loud ululating from the sky, and immediately saw two beautiful banshees making their way to the mountain and settling in the cave you just left behind. You smiled at the view, excited that Neytiri, Kiri and Tuk could make it in time. They followed you to the nest and you brought your curled fingers to your forehead, greeting them warmly. I see you.
“Good luck, sister! I cannot wait to fly with you!” Tuk’s enthusiasm never failed to bring a wide smile to your face.
You looked around at all the people who have travelled so far to come and be with you on this day. Your family, for all intents and purposes. You felt tears coming, but pushed them away with a sigh, trying to toughen your resolve. You gave one last look to Lo’ak, who was watching you sadly, the pain from yesterday still fresh in both your minds. You loved him so much, and hoped he would be able to forgive you in time. You touched his gift, now resting on your forehead, and gave him a grateful smile and a wink. He cracked a small grin and you knew then that your relationship wasn’t totally in ruins.
“This is it, Atan. Now you must choose your Ikran. If it also chooses you, move quick, like I’ve showed you. You will have one chance. I will be behind you in case you need any help. Please don’t fall off a cliff, I don’t think my heart could take it again.”
You laughed a little at his attempt of diffusing a situation. It wasn’t his best attribute.
“Ok then, let’s dance.”
Neteyam watched as you made your way through the Ikrans, and how they all flew away in fear at your sight - beautiful banshees that made him miss his own and reminisce about his own Iknimaya. You looked ready - powerful and confident, like you have always belonged here, with them. You were swinging your yìmkxa (mouth binder) and approaching each Ikran forcefully, hissing at them to hopefully provoke the right one. Eventually, a big banshee, bigger than his and most others he’s seen around, turns around to face you and does not remove itself from your path in the same way all the others had. It is a beautiful animal, white and gold with purple and pink wings and green stripes on its head, it looked different than any other in the village. Fitting, he thought. This was it.
He heard a loud hiss coming from where you were stood. The Ikran hissed back wildly and charged towards you. His heart was getting ready to exit his body at its speed and power, and he was panting in fear and anticipation, ready to jump in at any moment’s notice, in case you needed it. He saw you remove yourself quickly, skilfully, out of the animal’s way and wrap the yìmkxa around its mouth. Good, first step done.
You then took a hold of your queue and jumped on the Ikran’s back, placing your thighs around its neck and squeezing with all of your might. The Ikran wrung its neck in an attempt to escape you, but you worked on this for months preparing for this day - you were not letting go. Neteyam saw the banshee make its way towards the edge of a cliff, and you wrapped the arm that wasn’t holding the queue around its neck for more support.
Neteyam felt like he was going to pass out from the stress, and saw the next moments happen in slow motion, just like almost 7 years ago when you fell mid flight: the ikran managing to drop off the cliff, his wailing scream and immediate desire to join you, the hands of his mother and father wrapping around him keeping him in place, his own ikran dropping from a cliff at the sound of his call, him removing his parents’ hands forcefully and running towards his banshee, scrapping his arm painfully on the rock and the stabbing throb that followed, the feeling of a fresh injury and blood spilling down his arm, and yet still, no other thoughts in his mind than the need to save you, to right his past wrongs.
He makes the bond quickly and before anyone could stop him, he’s in the air, flying around the rock and beneath it, trying to see where you could be. He was shocked to find you still on your ikran, holding for dear life while the animal was flying upside down, shaking itself furiously to get rid of you. He saw you drop the arm you were using to hold on to it, only managing to hold on by the strength in your thighs, and connected the queues with a loud yell.
“STOP!” He heard you scream. “TURN AROUND, NOW!”
He couldn’t believe his eyes. You made your Tsaheylu, upside down, mid-flight. He watched as the banshee turned around and made its way back to where his family was, and he still had no words he could say to explain or describe what he was feeling in that moment. It was beyond words. He felt his arm twitching painfully and he quickly looked at it and saw the deep scratch that was leaking blood and staining his loincloth where his arm was laying.
You did it. You actually did it. This little prick came at you with all her might and you still held on to her. You learnt a lesson or two from riding a banshee as a 13 year old defenceless human, and the most important lesson was: hold on for dear life. Good to see it came in handy. You also made it a point to thank Neteyam for making you hang upside down in trees to shoot down targets, you can see now it helped. You landed at the base of the rookery and watched as every one of your family members was smiling and yelling, cheering loudly for your accomplishment. They looked so happy, and you couldn’t help shed a small tear and the sight.
These were your people, for the remainder of this short life, and you were happy you got to do this before you went. Happy you got to see them together, for you. You looked around at Neteyam and couldn’t see him, but then heard a loud, excited yelp from behind you. He looked so happy and proud, your heart swelled at the sight. This man would be the death of you, you knew. You loved him so much, and you knew it was time, time to talk through it.
“First flight seals the bond.” he screams over the noise of the banshees and the waterfall. “Let’s go.”
The entire family called for their ikrans, and in less than a minute, you were airborne. You told your banshee to fly gently and straight, and held on tightly to her neck while you tried to adjust to all these new overwhelming emotions. The feeling of flying was incredible, so much more so than you remembered. Maybe because this time you were in control. The feeling of the Tsaheylu... Lo’ak was right, it was so much stronger than the Pa’li, the connection you had with this animal. You knew you were bonded for life, shared a kinship and bond no one could break until one of you died, maybe even after. The feeling of belonging, as you watched 5 other ikran fly alongside yours and help you through your first of many adventures in the sky. You felt grateful and happy to have made it so far before the inevitable end.
You made it at the village soon after eclipse, laughing and dancing while you walked back, hand in hand with Kiri who was rolling her eyes at you but joining in anyway. Tuk was holding your other hand, and you lifted her up and carried her all the way back while she played with your braids.
As you arrived to your tent, you saw the rest of the family go into their own, with the promise you’d join after dropping all of your stuff. Neteyam stayed behind, closing his distance to you and only stopping when he was so close to you his chin was touching your forehead. It was only then you saw his arm, dried blood spilt everywhere and marring his beautiful blue stripes. His loincloth was also red, you noted, and saw the gash that was the culprit, high on his arm, still red and bleeding, although not enough to justify this much blood. It must have been bleeding for a while.
“What the hell happened to you?!” You said with a panicked voice.
“It’s nothing, don’t worry about it.”
You raised and eyebrow at him and rolled you eyes, and pulled him to your tent by his uninjured arm.
“Sit. I will clean and stitch it and then we can go for dinner.”
He did as he was told, quietly sitting on the ground while you gathered supplies: some gauze, disinfectant, numbing cream, stitches and a needle driver, as well as some forceps and scissors. He squirmed at the sight, and you rolled your eyes again.
“You drive me crazy when you roll your eyes at me, you know? I would kill to be the reason your eyes roll in the back of your head at night.”
You blushed at his words, and sat next to him on the ground.
“You have to stop, Neteyam. We can’t do this again.”
You turned your focus on his wound, and began cleaning it slowly so as to not injure him further.
“I can’t stop, Atan. I can’t think of anything else. I have so much I want to say to you, so much I need to get off my chest.”
He sounded sad, desperate for you to hear him out, his eyes pleading and pained.
“How about we talk, after dinner? This time, you can be the one sneaking in my tent late at night.” you said sarcastically, not having forgotten his outburst from earlier and realising you were still angry at him for it.
“Yes, please.”
You sat in silence the rest of the time, as you worked with skilled, focused hands. You stitched his wound carefully, so as to not leave him with a scar. When you finished, you smiled up at him, and reached your hand to touch his face, moving a strand of beaded hair from it and pushing it behind his ear. He was so, so beautiful. He brought a hand to your chin and was pulling you closer, when someone entered the tent without making their presence known, making you both jolt back in shock. It was a girl. You’ve seen her before in the village, she was a healer in training. Beautiful and skilled, she was a good singer and a good craftswoman, making a lot of the clothes the Na’vi hunters wore.
“Oh, Great Mother, here you are! Your mother told me about your injury, and I had to come find you so I could help!” She kneeled down on the other side of Neteyam from where you were sitting and touched Neteyam’s chest, moving him around looking for the bleed, that was no longer there.
“Oh, it seems much better now than what was described. I guess it’s true what they say, you really are that skilled.” She turned her attention to you and smiled.
“Thank you. I don’t think we’ve properly met.”
“You’re right, my bad! I’m Tiongli. Neteyam’s mate.”
It was so quiet in the room now, you were sure they could both hear your heart break into a million pieces.
Tag list: @nuhteyam @eywas-heir @fanboyluvr @mashiromochi @puffb4ll @sassy-persona @simp4ff @mommyneytiri @k----a27s
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A Second Mask: Chapter 4
Did that just happen?
Hello guys! It's me. I'm finally writing again. Sorry about the delay. I'm going to explain more at the end of the chapter, but I'm just going to keep the beginning short. So here is chapter 4:
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To say Adrien was concerned would be a huge understatement. He was downright disturbed. Its been weeks and still Marinette hadn't changed back to the happy, peppy, nice girl that he knew. AND SHE WOULDN'T EVEN TALK TO HIM ABOUT IT!
He tried to talk to her for a whole week after her original trasformation, but after the repeated firm rejections, he stopped altogether. He figured that maybe with some space, she might be able to work through whatever she was going through, but at this point, he's losing hope.
When he is feeling this distressed about something, he usually turns to his lady, but she has been acting weird too. Ever since she suggested they start sparring, she's started to show that she is going through kinda a rough time as well. She is the same ladybug when everyone is watching, but when it's just the two of them, she looks sad and tired. She has also started saying some concerning things while they are sparring. She has started talking about how she has started taking being Ladybug and the Guardian more seriously, and how she has less distractions now, which would be a good thing if she didn't say them so sadly.
The good thing is, the sparring has given him a chance to get out his aggression because of the whole Marinette-situation and his anger at his father in a safe environment. He didn't like the idea of hitting Ladybug at first (especially in the face) but with her not holding back on her hits, he felt more comfortable doing the same. It has helped them fight better too. He hopes that whatever Ladybug is going through in her civillian life will work itself out soon, but until then he will be there for her. He just needs to figure out how to be there for Marinette.
•••
Felix was making good progress with Marinette. After they first asked marinette about (insert fashion question of your choice here, I legit know nothing and I didn't have time to research anything for this chapter), she had started answering their questions on a daily basis. After a couple of days of that, she had started to rant to them about different things in the fashion world that were bothering her, exciting her, or confusing her that particular day. In response to that, they had started to respond to her rants with their own opinions on the subjects and even start their own rants.
It had gotten to the point where Felix would now consider them to be friends, though they know that Marinette would never call them as such, it was fine with them. They know she has trust issues, and they can understand why, so they are fine with being friends in everything but a name.
Felix was looking forward to their daily banter as they waited in their seat for Marinette to arrive. When she did, she was followed by a very pissed-looking Alya. Felix turned to look at her and noticed that she had what looked to be tears forming in her eyes. What they didn't notice was the little black butterfly that had entered through the window in the back of the room, and was making a beeline towards her.
•••
Marinette walked to school in yet another one of her newest fashion creations: a pair of oversized grey ripped jeans and a navy blue sweatshirt. She was actually really liking her new look, and the comfort that it offered was just an added plus.
She was actually feeling excited to talk to Felix about Gabriel Agreste's newest fashion flop. They were the only person that she had met that actually cared about fashion as much as her. It made her happy to talk to them. It kind of scared her how excited she was. Shouldn't she be distancing herself from everyone? she thought to herself. No. Felix isn't my friend, they aren't close to me, they are just someone I talk fashion with. Like a coworker, yeah. Totally. Felix is just a coworker. ("Liar" says the inner voice in her head)
She was shocked out of her thoughts when she was pulled to the side by someone as she entered the courtyard. Her mind immediately thought of an akuma, when the person spoke.
"Marinette! Girl," Oh it's just Alya. Wait Alya? "How long are you gonna keep up this cry for attention? Are you really THAT jealous of Lila? I know that Adrien likes her, but that doesn't give you the right to act like this! And you are hanging out with Felix, who accused her of sexually harrassing Adrien on their first day here-?" She looked absolutely furious at her, but Marinette had heard enough. She cut Alya off in the middle of her presumably long rant.
"ALYA!" Said girl jumped at both the inturruption and the tone of voice used, "First of all, this isn't a cry for attention, if anything its a cry for leaving me the fuck alone. Second of all, I'm not jealous of Lila. I'm not in love with Adrien anymore, and haven't been for a while. You knew that I was dating Luka right? Why would I care who Adrien likes? Lastly, I am allowed to hang out with whoever I choose, whether you like them or not. It's none of your fucking business Alya, and if you think that I'm just some jealous, attention-seeker why do you even care?" With that last question she stormed off to the classroom, leaving a speechless Alya behind her.
When marinette sat down in her seat, she just kept thinking about how Alya was just talking to her. How could she think that about her? They used to be best friends, and Alya wasn't even concerned about her not talking to her anymore, she was just concerned about her being "jealous of Lila". It made her so furious that she could feel tears trickling down her face. She sees the black butterfly out of the corner of her eye and without hesitation grabs it out of the air.
(Next part is taken from this post by @bigfatbreak)
"Go ahead and akumatize me- See what happens, Hawkmoth!" She screamed the words with a slight madness that the energy of the akuma was giving her, "Every leash has two ends! I just have to pull until I find where you're holding it!"
At this point, the entire class was frozen in place watching her and listening to her crazed-sounding voice threaten an actual terrorist. Marinette felt Hawkmoth's confusion and terror through the bond. What in the- She's sensing me through the Akuma?! The akuma then started to fly away, and when it couldn't it zapped her hand like it was made of lightning and fluttered through the same window it came from. Marinette felt like she had failed yet again and collapsed down on her desk, muttering, "Uuuuggghh. It escaped anyway... What a waste. I didn't realize that Hawkmoth was such a coward. He usually likes grandstand..."
She was startled when her hand was picked up by Felix's, "You likely scared him off by managing to locate him like that... A risky move, I should mention. I would ask that you not attempt that a second time. No one knows what his akuma is truly capable of. You'll want to keep off of this hand for a while, too."
"Oh, are those the doctor's orders? Why, Felix, it almost sounds like you care about meeee." Marinette was all too amused by Felix's concern for her. She also liked to tease them... AS COWORKERS DO.
"I have an investment in your presence. Now don't be cheeky and let's get you to the nurse's office," They said while holding her wrist and gently pulling her in that direction.
Marinette scoffed, "'An investment in my presence'??"
Felix chuckled while still semi-dragging her by the wrist towards the front of the room, being careful not to hurt her injury even worse, "What did I just say about being cheeky?"
On their way out of the door they passed a VERY distressed-looking Adrien. He seemed to be sharing the sentiment with the entire class of: Did that just happen?
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And thats chapter 4. It is VERY LATE! I know. I've been swamped with work, and when I went to write it, I had zero ideas on how to write this chapter. I never ended up getting those ideas. I just went where my writing took me, so if it doesn't really match the characters that's why. I will try to be better at updating regularly, but it probably won't happen. Sorry to everyone with a normal sleep schedule, but this is the time that I write things. Also I didn't have my outline with me while writing this chapter, so it might not have everything I planned to write in it.
I would like to thank you all for all of the support I've been getting on this fic. Despite all of the chapter delays, you guys have stuck with me through all of it, so thank each and every one of you. I love seeing so many people loving this au as much as I do. Without you guys this story wouldn't exist, and I would've stopped writing it after the first chapter.
As always, constructive criticism is always accepted. I love being able to improve my writing whenever possible.
Thank you for reading. Have a nice day/night/whenever you are reading this. See ya next time guys, gals, and non-binary pals.
Taglist
@queer-illusion @apasponsor @heckinggremlin @1-ahiro-1 @hewantedbeefintheparkinglot @sassakitty @lennauts @rianoel @dorkus-minimus @khneltea @welp-that-was-unexpected @mlnchlymrshmllw @lovelyautumnsunflower @chariphrasis @lovesbooks @komatsuna-yuki @polyvirnl @innocentlyguiltyfrenchfry @qhobias @ive-tumbled-down-a-rabbit-hole @hammalammadamdam @cloudydaysomewhere @alcoholic-barney @basenikon @xxbehindthemaskxx @corporeal-terrestrial @shadowymemoirs @moonlight-densetsuu
#a second mask#feralnette#feralnette au#felinette#miraculous ladybug#ml fanfic#adrien agreste#felix culpa#marinette dupain cheng#here it finally is#idk why some of the tags arent working
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Ok so what sbout remus/sirius being too sick to go to an away game so the other one has to go alone, and then tons of facetime conversations and "get well soon" videos from the team?
This is related to this fic about Remus and Finn bonding over terrible reporters--hope you enjoy! SW credit goes to @lumosinlove, and the Loops/ Talker bonding is for @lee-1012!
TW for illness
“You don’t look so good.” Remus frowned as he held the inside of his wrist against Sirius’ forehead. “And you definitely have a fever.”
“Non.” Sirius sat up on his elbows with a groan, then almost immediately flopped back down.
“Yes.” He leaned back on his heels and checked the clock—they had two hours before they had to be at the airport. “Baby, I don’t think you should—”
“ ‘m going.”
“It’s not a good—”
“Gotta go. Games.” Sirius cracked one glassy eye open. “Two weeks away. I’ll take the first couple days off.”
Remus sighed through his nose and brushed his sweaty hair out of his eyes. “You shouldn’t go on the plane if you’re sick. Not just for your sake, but for the rest of us. We don’t need everyone to come down with this.”
He received a halfhearted glare in response, but Sirius finally huffed and curled on his side to nuzzle against his thigh. “I’m gonna miss you.”
“I’ll miss you, too, baby,” Remus said quietly, bending to kiss his temple. They hadn’t been apart for that long since before he was a player, nearly a year prior. Hell, he had never played a game without Sirius, let alone two weeks’ worth. “Lily will check on you, okay?”
Sirius mumbled an incoherent response and cuddled closer when he began combing his fingers through his hair. The second alarm beeped, loud against the quiet of their bedroom; time to go, he thought ruefully. Sirius touched his knee as he started to stand. “Love you. Be safe.”
“Love you more.”
“Love you most.”
“Go back to sleep,” Remus said as his heart clenched. “I’ll let Coach know what happened, but you’ve got to rest and take care of yourself. Hydrate or die-drate, yeah?”
“Yeah. Love you.”
“Sleep,” he repeated, kissing his forehead once more before hauling himself out of bed and tucking the covers around Sirius’ shoulders. “I’ll be back before you know it.”
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The clouds were a soft, pastel pink around them as the sun rose—Sirius’ favorite. If his phone was correct, Lily would be there soon to let Hattie out and make sure Sirius wasn’t pushing himself too hard. The thought brought Remus a bit of relief, but not enough to quell his concern.
Talker poked his forearm, snapping him from his reverie. “What’s going on?”
“Just worrying.”
“About Cap?”
Remus waved a hand vaguely. “And Hattie, and Lily, and whether he’s got a cold or something worse. Feels weird being here without him.”
Talker hummed his agreement and offered one of his earbuds. “Want to listen to half of Bohemian Rhapsody with me? It’ll give you five minutes and 55 seconds of relative peace.”
“It’s too quiet,” James groaned just before he pressed ‘play’.
Across the aisle, Remus saw Kasey roll his eyes. “Your husband is sick, dude, not dead. He doesn’t talk to you on planes anyway.”
“It’s the principle of the thing, Bliz.”
“Oh my god,” Kasey muttered under his breath, securing his headphones tightly over his ears.
James let his head flop to the side with a baleful look. “Loops, you’re on my side, right?”
“I’ve got you, buddy,” he assured him. Talker stifled a laugh, and the opening chords began as more clouds rolled past. Remus let himself drift with them, taking deep breaths to soothe his worries; Sirius would be fine. He had the sniffles, or at worst the flu, and he would be join them for the second week in top form. There was nothing to worry about.
---------------------------------
“He’s got pneumonia,” Lily sighed.
“He what?”
“A mild case, but the doctor said it would take a week of antibiotics and rest before he’s close to a hundred percent. No hockey for about a month, too.”
Remus stared at the wall of his empty hotel room, lost for words. “Well, fuck.”
“Yeah.”
“Fuck.”
“Pretty m—absolutely not, go lay down.” There was a rustling noise and two grumbling voices. “Sorry about that.”
“Will you put me on speaker real quick?” Remus asked, pinching the bridge of his nose until he heard a faint click. “Sirius? You there?”
“Yes! I miss you, and I was just going to tell you that it’s really not that—”
“Please sit your ass down. Lily, if he tries to fuck around and find out exactly how nasty pneumonia is, you have full permission to sit on him. I miss you too, love,” he added after a short pause.
“He’s blowing you a kiss,” Lily informed him. “Oh, and he’s giving me the puppy eyes.”
“Resist if you can. Love you both. Give Hattie lots of cuddles from me.”
“We will,” she promised.
The second the call ended, Remus groaned aloud and thumped his head against the wall before padding down the hall. Just my fucking luck. The door swung open after the second knock; Arthur’s face fell. “How bad is it?”
“Mild pneumonia.”
“Fuck.”
“Yep. Doctor said he’d be out for a month.”
Arthur rubbed his eyes and nodded, motioning Remus back towards his own room. “Get some rest, then. I’ll let everyone know in the morning. Any idea how he got it?”
“Not a clue.”
“Thanks for the update, Loops. Sleep tight.”
“I will,” Remus lied as he headed back for a sleepless night between cold sheets.
----------------------------
Lily sent updates every few hours; most reported that Sirius was sleeping well and looking better with each passing day, but Remus couldn’t help but feel overwhelmingly guilty. If something happened while he was hundreds of miles away, he would never forgive himself. He had sworn in front of their closest friends and family to be there in sickness and in health—what kind of husband ditches their partner for one of a million roadies?
This one. He stabbed a piece of broccoli and shoved it in his mouth. And then he goes and makes an idiot of himself for the world to see.
The interview was supposed to be easy, but he couldn’t let it roll off anymore. Not when he couldn’t answer their questions even when he wanted to, not when he was states away from the love of his life while he was sick, not when he felt helpless and shoved aside in every current aspect of his life.
“So.” The chair next to him creaked as Talker planted his full weight in it and set his plate decisively on the table.
“What.”
“Oh, pissy Loops. Haven’t seen you in a while. Talked to Cap yet?”
“Yeah.” Another piece of broccoli fell victim to his frustration.
“How’s he sound?”
“Better.”
“Sweet.” Talker continued to munch away on his dinner. “Anyone ever told you that you have the general disposition of a wet cat when you’re upset?”
Remus tried and failed to keep down a smile. “I seem to recall you bringing it up on occasion, yes.”
His dark eyes softened and he bumped their elbows together. “He’ll be okay.”
“I know.”
“Really, Loops. Cap’s going to be just fine. Lily doesn’t sugar-coat this kind of stuff, and he’s a tough guy. Mild pneumonia doesn’t stand a chance. Besides, we’ve only got four days left and we need you to kick some ass out there.”
If Remus was a little more emotionally vulnerable, he would’ve burst into tears. Instead, he settled for leaning his temple against Talker’s with a quiet ‘thanks’ and allowed himself to be pulled into a side hug. Across the dining hall, Finn shot him a thumbs-up and a wink. “Love you, man.”
“Yeah, yeah, whatever,” Talker teased. “The internet is already coming to your aid, you know.”
“About…?”
“Not only have those asshole reporters become a new meme, you’ve also got a shit ton of people bringing up past mistreatment of athletes in the press room. You’re the face of a revolution, Loops.”
“I’ve been the face of too many revolutions for one person,” he groused, not even bothering to duck out of the way when Talker ruffled his hair.
“Well, one more won’t kill you.”
---------------------------------------
Remus’ heart raced as he stepped off the plane. The logical part of him knew that Sirius would be waiting outside the security gate, but everything else screamed to see him now, now, right now so he could be sure he was alright. At least he had sounded healthier on the phone the night before—Remus wasn’t sure what he would do otherwise.
“Deep breaths,” James reminded him as they walked toward the baggage claim. “I’m sure he’s—”
An excited shout broke through the thick crowds. Remus’ heart skipped a beat, and then he was running, racing through the people that parted for him as his vision tunneled. His carry-on hit the ground with a low thud that he hardly heard as Sirius lifted him straight off the ground and held him tight.
“I love you,” Remus said immediately, locking his ankles around Sirius’ lower back and squeezing his eyes shut. “Are you okay?”
In lieu of a response, Sirius pulled back and kissed him, cradling one side of his face in his warm, warm hand. Two weeks may as well have been an eternity. He broke away after a moment, searching his face for any signs of illness or pain. “I’m fine,” Sirius said softly, as if he could read his mind. “I promise. A little tired and sore, but there’s no lasting damage.”
“Don’t do that again,” Remus said into the side of his neck as he hugged him close. He smelled like home. “Not when I have to leave.”
Sirius’ arms were steady around his back. “I won’t.”
“I’m going to grill you on everything as soon as we get home.”
“I know.”
“But right now, I’m just going to hug you because I missed you and I worried myself into a hole, like, every night.”
He could feel Sirius’ smile against his shoulder. “I know.”
#remus lupin#sirius black#coops#thomas walker#talker#james potter#lily potter#sweater weather#lumosinlove#my fic#fanfic#sick fic
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for your happy prompts ask, perhaps kara is a documentary film maker who follows ceo lena around for a doc and ends up falling in love with her by learning a bunch of little things she finds out during filming? also p.s. i absolutely adore your writing even when it tugs at the heartstrings. thank you for writing what you do! it makes my day everytime i see an update or get an email
She wasn’t allowed to see Lena Luthor until she’d signed so many papers that, if stacked together, would be taller than she was. She wasn’t even allowed to touch her camera around Lena Luthor until the woman herself, CEO extraordinaire, had personally vetted Kara out.
“You know,” Kara said as casually as she could, finding herself nervously adjusting her glasses when Lena’s cold gaze fell on her, “I usually have a whole team with me when I do this.”
“And I agreed to this on the condition that only one nosy filmmaker follows me around, not a whole team.” Lena’s reply was like everything else Kara had learned about the CEO thus far: she was blunt, a little harsh, tone and eyes cold and emotionless. She gave nothing away, not in her walk, in her mannerisms, in the ridiculously healthy food she ate, in the way she spoke to her employees or board members. She was cool, detached, wickedly smart, and utterly composed. “And I must approve the final result,” she added, gesturing to the mountain of paperwork Kara signed.
(Kara sighed internally, a tiny part of her sure Lena was a robot.)
“But it’s everything, right?” Kara clarified. “A total look into your life, no holding back?”
“You may follow me around to your heart’s content,” Lena said, leaning back in her desk chair, studying Kara intently.
“May I ask, Ms. Luthor, what made you agree to this, when you’re usually so distrustful of the media?”
Lena gave Kara a smile that didn’t touch her eyes. “What made you ask to do this when you know I distrust the media?”
Lena hadn’t answered, so Kara knew she didn’t have to either, but she felt it was important to establish some kind of rapport with the woman she’d be following around for the next few weeks. “I’m of the opinion that things are rarely as simple as they seem from the outside, that’s all.”
“Well,” Lena said, looking pleasantly surprised and offering Kara a grin (a real one, one that touched her eyes and transformed her face), “perhaps that’s why I agreed to you doing this.”
x
“You’re one of Ms. Luthor’s closest friends, is that right?”
“Yes.”
“Since before your daughter was born?”
“Yup.”
“So would you say you know her quite well?”
“Sure.”
“Do you plan on answering any of my questions with more than one word?”
“Nope.”
“Okay. So, in one word I suppose, how would you describe Ms. Luthor to a stranger?”
“Flawless.”
x
The rules of her arrangement with Lena were rather simple. For the next several weeks, Lena consented to having Kara around from the moment she woke up to the moment she went to sleep. In return, Kara was not allowed in certain meetings at L-Corp, was not allowed to bring her camera with her at all when Lena went down to R&D, and if Lena asked for her to stop filming at any point, Kara was bound to immediately do so and erase any footage she may have inadvertently captured.
For the first two days of the arrangement, it was actually rather boring. Lena was awake before the crack of dawn, she didn’t acknowledge Kara’s presence as she made coffee and toast (though she did push a cup and a plate towards Kara), and then spent the next fifteen or so hours in her office, sifting through papers, answering phone calls and responding to emails, and forgetting meals. It wasn’t until the third day that Lena’s routine changed slightly.
She received a phone call at breakfast, and whoever it was caused a bright red blush to bloom on her cheeks. Kara zoomed in slightly on Lena’s face as she answered the call. “Now’s not really a good time, Sam,” she began, falling silent at whatever this Sam was saying on the other end. Lena’s eyes flitted over towards Kara, but to her surprise, she didn’t ask for Kara to shut off the camera. “That sounds terrible,” she said, sounding truly apologetic, something about her countenance changing. She seemed softer, more open, calmer than Kara had seen her yet. “And Ruby was so excited too.” Lena fell silent once more, nodding almost as if unaware of it. “I agree with her,” Lena suddenly laughed, still nodding, “it’s not fair at all. But there’s no way I’m not going to visit. Do you want me to bring anything?” Lena laughed again, and Kara wondered if her camera was capturing the change she was witnessing with her own eyes. “As if I could forget Ruby’s chocolate.” A pause. “Give her all my love.” Another pause, a tiny smile on Lena’s lips. “All right, I will. Bye.” As she hung up, she looked over at Kara, as if daring her to comment, everything about her shuttering at once.
“Who was that?” Kara asked, not really expecting an answer. To her surprise, however, Lena’s eyes flitted to the camera and she let out a soft, resigned sigh.
“That was my CFO, Sam Arias,” she answered, her tone a complete 180 from what she was using on the phone. She studied Kara for a moment and must have read something on her face, because her shoulders deflated and she motioned towards her phone. “Sam is my best friend. Her daughter, Ruby, is my goddaughter. We were supposed to go to the animal shelter today.” Lena smiled softly, almost as if unaware of it. “She’s finally convinced Sam she’s responsible enough for a pet. It’s actually—” Lena stopped suddenly, her eyes shifting to the camera once more, any warmth that had managed to leak out dissipating at once. “In any case, she’s sick. So we’ll have to reschedule.” She waved her hand towards the camera. “Can you turn that off, please?”
“Uh, yeah, of course,” Kara said quickly, making a show of turning the Camcorder off and setting it aside. “Is something wrong?”
Lena shook her head, leaning against her kitchen counter as she eyed Kara with something like curiosity. “You know, I’ve seen all of your other work,” she said after a moment, frowning at Kara like she was a puzzle she couldn’t figure out.
(Had she? Seen all of Kara’s work? A part of Kara was curious as to how, after all, most of her stuff was tucked away in a closet back in Midvale, waiting to be opened up and viewed during Christmas, when Alex would laugh at the films she’d made in high school about how the boys’ sports teams were unfairly given more attention than the girls’. The others were projects for her degree and one or two failed attempts to get a real production company to take the risk on her.
In fact, if not for Cat Grant’s decision as ‘The Queen of All Media’ to get involved in filmmaking, funding a project from a no-name creator, Kara wasn’t even sure she’d have the film she was making now.)
“Oh,” she said inarticulately, not quite sure how to word what she was really thinking. How rich did you have to be to be able to bribe anyone into giving you anything?
Lena nodded carefully, her face a perfect mask. If not for the way her eyes followed Kara’s every movement, Kara would’ve even thought that Lena was bored. “You’re very fond of certain themes. Hope. Love. Endless optimism in the best of humanity.” She said it like it was a bad thing. And it was suddenly Kara’s turn to lean forward on the opposite end of the counter, feeling her head tilt to the side questioningly.
“Is that what you got from my films?” she asked, genuinely curious.
Lena seemed wary of the question, standing up straight and crossing her arms over her chest defensively. “Isn’t that what you intended?”
“You know,” Kara said slowly, “I don’t actually believe in all that creator’s intent nonsense. I think we search for parts of ourselves when we consume art. So if that’s what you got from my films, that says more about you than it does about me.”
If anything, this seemed to offend Lena. “So you’d deny having any sort of intent with your work? What about making something with meaning?”
Kara laughed, shaking her head. “That’s not what I mean, and besides, who says art has to mean anything?”
“Of course art means something,” Lena argued, narrowing her eyes at Kara. “What’s the point of doing it if it doesn’t mean anything?”
Kara shrugged easily, giving Lena a small smile. “I disagree. I think art says something. But meaning is up to the people who consume it.” She picked up her camera and pointed it at Lena without turning it on. “Doesn’t matter what I intended to say with my films, you got meaning from it. So I’d say there was a point in making it, don’t you think?”
Lena eyed her for a moment, apparently not liking that Kara wasn’t giving her an answer, wasn’t telling her what she was trying to say with her work. But then, after several long seconds, she relented, letting out a chuckle and shaking her head. “Well, fine,” she said, her smile touching her eyes. “As long as you don’t try to say anything silly like hope, love, or endless optimism in the best of humanity with this film.”
“I’m afraid I can’t change who you are, Ms. Luthor,” Kara said softly, turning her camera on and effectively cutting off any response Lena may have had.
(And when she looks at the footage weeks later, she’ll freeze that frame, breath catching at the look on Lena’s face: the softness of her eyes, the curve of her lips, and the pleasantly confused crinkle between her brows.)
x
“Do you spend a lot of time with your godmother?”
“Oh yeah, loads! She’s great.”
“What sort of things do you do with her?”
“I mean, normal stuff? She takes me to get ice cream all the time. The other day, she rented that new horror movie that came out and watched it with me when I stayed over. My mom went nuts when she found out.”
“So you like her?”
“No, of course not. I love Lena. She’s my aunt, you know? She’s family.”
“And if you had the chance, what would you want the world to know about her?”
“That she cares, so much. And that she’s funny and super smart and helps me with homework and after my mom she’s the very best person I know.”
x
The visit to Luthor Children’s Hospital was, as far as Kara was aware, unplanned and in fact gave Jess a great deal of anxiety. For her part, Kara was mostly frustrated and annoyed, wondering if this film was worth it at all. Because Lena Luthor seemed to be asking Kara to turn off the camera more and more, especially when her day deviated at all and she was forced to leave her office.
(Walks in the park, lunches with her goddaughter, a touching moment with the child of one of her employees...all locked away somewhere in Kara’s memory, but destined to remain there instead of on film, where it should be.)
She huffed a little bit as she leaned against the wall, watching Lena walk quickly towards the group of nurses and doctors. She didn’t say anything when Jess joined her, a contemplative look on her face. “She always does this,” Jess told Kara after a long silence, rolling her eyes fondly. “She’ll cancel meetings last minute because she heard one of the kids in the hemoc ward has finished treatment or that they’re out of toys to give to the new patients.”
“Why isn’t there any press if she does this often?” Kara asked, turning to Jess but watching Lena out of the corner of her eye. She was talking to one of the doctors now, looking comically out of place with her designer clothes while surrounded by colorful artwork by kids that littered the walls of the Children’s Hospital.
Jess fixed Kara with an unimpressed look. “You’ve met her, right?” she asked rhetorically. “She goes out of her way to hide these visits. She says that she has to keep it under wraps because she wants to keep it about the kids and not her. But I think the truth is she’s just worried people would mistreat the kids and their families for allowing a ‘Luthor’ within ten feet of them.”
“Oh,” Kara said dumbly, a little stunned by the new information, and feeling guilty for her thoughts earlier. “That’s...awful.”
“I’m not telling you this for nothing, you know,” Jess continued, frowning at Kara. “She’s been avoiding lots of her usual charitable work since you’ve been around. The whole point of this was to get everyone else to see the real Lena Luthor, but she’s ruining it by being humble and noble.”
(Kara wanted to groan, roll her eyes, or better yet go over to Lena herself and shake her until she understood what Kara’s job was.
How was she supposed to make a documentary about Lena Luthor if Lena Luthor was so determined to hide herself away from the world?)
“What would you have me do?” she asked, not voicing her frustration, though it seeped into her tone anyway. “We have a deal, and she doesn’t want me to film these things.”
Jess shook her head, looking terribly unimpressed by the answer. “Don’t you have artistic integrity? Would you allow anyone else to boss you around and tell you what you could and couldn’t film?”
Kara looked over at Lena, who was now smiling at a young boy who had ambled up to her with his mother and infusion pump stand in tow. She watched as Lena actually dropped to her knees to talk to the boy, nodding vigorously at whatever he was saying. After a long moment, she turned back to Jess and shook her head. “No,” she said finally. “I guess I wouldn’t.”
And after Jess had given her another significant look before walking off, Kara raised her camera and began to film.
x
“Mr. Spheer, you’re an ex of Lena Luthor’s, right?”
“Ah, I see this documentary is quite personal. Are you sure that Lena is okay with this sort of thing going into her movie?”
“Well, it’s my movie. But she’s free to ask me to take things out.”
“Fascinating. Yes, I am Lena’s ex. I was quite brokenhearted when she broke it off to move to National City.”
“Oh, she broke it off?”
“So curious, Ms. Danvers. Perhaps you’re interested in something beyond a mere film?”
“W-what? No, that’s—please be serious, Mr. Spheer—”
“It’s Jack to you, my dear. What else do you need to know about Lena? Her favorite flowers are plumerias, her favorite food is—”
“—oh that’s really not necessary. If we could just focus on who Lena is as a person. A friend. A former girlfriend?”
“Hmm, yes. Well, just imagine your perfect woman, Ms. Danvers.”
“Oh, um, I—”
“—exactly, you see Lena. That’s an universal experience, I’m afraid. Lena is simply...too good for this world.”
“So you’d say the treatment she gets by the public is unfair?”
“It’s unfair how much people attack pineapple on pizza, Ms. Danvers. The way they speak of Lena without knowing her? That’s a pure travesty.”
x
They were about ten days into filming when Kara saw Lena relax for the first time.
She was using the word ‘relax’ rather loosely, of course. Lena didn’t do what Kara did after a long week—put on a pair of sweatpants, order loads of junk food, and watch so much Netflix that it eventually felt the need to ask her if she was still watching. In fact, Lena’s idea of relaxing was more work. Just, fun work.
She was dressed in jeans and a blue shirt, knees pulled up to her chest as she sat at her desk, mumbling under her breath as she did whatever she was doing. (She hadn’t bothered to explain to Kara, had just sighed and acquiesced to the presence of the camera in her home office.) Perched precariously at the tip of her nose were a thick black pair of glasses, her hair falling to her shoulders in gentle waves.
She looked different. Softer, somehow. Gone was all the trappings of a badass CEO, and all that was left was a clever (and beautiful) young woman, working on the things she loved in her spare time.
Kara zoomed in slightly, focusing on Lena’s face, on the furrow between her brows, her lips twisted in concentration. There was something there, something different, and Kara just wanted to—
“Is that camera heavy?” Lena asked, looking up suddenly, a curious expression on her face. She was good at that, the polite looks, gently asking for more information. Tiny eyebrow raises, nearly imperceptible softening of her eyes, lips quirked the slightest bit, all intended to disarm her quarry, making them drop their guard long enough that they give everything held close to their chest away.
“Not really,” Kara answered, grinning at Lena. This made the other woman blink in surprise, clearly not the response she was looking for, that expression on her face shifting suddenly, becoming more calculating. “I work out,” Kara went on to explain, shrugging easily, careful not to jostle the camera. “Besides, it’s not that heavy, I think about five pounds.”
“What kind of camera do you use?”
“Oh, it’s a Panasonic AG-HVX—” she cut herself off. “It’s not that interesting.” Kara adjusted her glasses and made sure Lena’s face was still in focus. Somehow, this made Lena’s tiny smile reappear. She stood up and circled her desk, and Kara was forced to back away to maintain focus.
“You love filming, don’t you?” Lena asked, and Kara blinked, not quite sure where she was going with this.
“Ms. Luthor, as I’m sure you’re aware, this film is about you.”
If she thought this would in any way cow Lena, she was wrong. Lena just grinned, looking like she’d somehow won something.
“Do you know what I don’t understand?” she said with faux casualness, crossing her arms and tapping a finger against her elbow. “Why would you, someone Cat Grant speaks so highly of, be willing to agree to this assignment? Something most people wouldn’t touch with a ten foot pole.”
Kara frowned, not thinking as she responded. “It wasn’t assigned, Ms. Luthor. I pitched the idea. I wanted to do this.” Lena’s words sank in a moment later. “Wait. Cat Grant spoke highly of me?”
“Why?” Lena asked, no longer smiling.
Kara blinked at the change in tone. “Why what?” she asked, genuinely confused. This was, apparently, the wrong answer, because Lena chose that moment to begin pacing in front of her desk, looking more than a little bothered.
“I don’t get it,” she said as she paced. “I tried to figure it out, looked into you, into your work. I thought maybe you were doing this to build fame, but I’ve seen your work and even without a movie about the last Luthor, I have no doubt you’ll be very popular—”
“Oh, that’s nice of you, thank y—”
“—then I thought maybe you have a vendetta against my family and just want me to look bad,” Lena continued, barreling over Kara’s words and ignoring her entirely, “but the only connection between you and my family is your cousin, Clark Kent, and he’s the journalist who broke the story on my brother, so if anything I should dislike you—”
“That’s not exactly...Clark and I aren’t—”
“—so I really need you to explain it to me. Why did you want to make this film?” She paused her brisk pacing as she asked the question, meeting Kara’s eyes with a fierce look, one Kara was infinitely glad she was capturing on film. Because this, this glint in Lena’s eyes, was why Kara wanted to do this.
“Do you remember the speech you gave when you came to National City?” Kara asked, and judging from the way Lena’s eyebrows rose in response, she was rather thrown by the question. “Because I do. I watched it maybe a few dozen times. All those horrible questions, all the absolute certainty that you were like your brother, and you kept your head up and you promised to prove them all wrong, to make up for what he did.” Kara sighed, shutting off the camera and setting it aside gently. “I’ve never seen anything quite like it. I was...interested. I wanted to see more.”
“And?”
“And what?”
“Did I meet your expectations? Disappoint you? What?”
Kara smiled, unable to help it. “Does my opinion on you really matter?”
“Do you always answer a question with another question?” Lena shot back, eyes narrowing.
Kara’s smile just widened and she began to gather her things, preparing to leave for the night. Impressively, Lena didn’t question her further, just watched her then followed her to the door, looking rather cross. Pausing briefly to adjust her glasses and the strap of her bag, Kara turned suddenly and met Lena’s eyes. “You exceeded them. My expectations, that is,” Kara added when Lena offered only a quizzical look in response.
For a moment, Lena didn’t react, then that same look from her office—the softness of her eyes, the curve of her lips, and the pleasantly confused crinkle between her brows—overtook her expression, and she let out a laugh.
“Well, good then.”
x
“You went to boarding school with Ms. Luthor?”
“I don’t think that’s public knowledge, how do you know that?”
“Um, Ms. Arias told me about you. She mentioned your relationship with Ms. Luthor is unique.”
“Well, Sam would know, wouldn’t she?”
“Ms. Rojas, if you don’t want to speak to me, you don’t have to.”
“It’s fine. Look, Lena and I have been estranged for a while now. I...I did something to break her trust.”
“So would you say that Ms. Luthor is difficult to get along with?”
“No, I’d say that Lena values things like honesty and trust, and—you know that Austen novel? With the man who says that once you lose his good opinion, it’s gone forever?”
“Pride and Prejudice?”
“Exactly. Lena is like that.”
“Ms. Luthor is like Mr. Darcy?”
“No, she’s classic. No matter what’s going on, she’ll endure.”
“So...you were the one difficult to get along with?”
“Have you ever thought about taking your work to a whole new level, Kara? How do you feel about virtual reality?”
“Oh, um, I don’t have particular thoughts? But I’d love to know yours about Ms. Luthor. For the film.”
“She won’t believe this, or that I’m saying it coercion free, but Lena is...a visionary. More than that, she’s just a decent person. Which is more than most of us can say, don’t you think?”
x
After their conversation, Lena opened up dramatically.
(Well, dramatically was a stretch, but considering how closed off she’d been before, the difference was rather drastic.)
Kara filmed Lena’s visit to an animal shelter, capturing the way her fingers gently ran over the fur of the dog that immediately trotted over to her, placing its head in her lap. Lena had then explained that she went to shelters often, just to volunteer, as she was unable to adopt for fear of not having time to give the dog the attention it deserved.
Later that week, Lena let Kara stay later than usual, putting on some music as she got to cooking, going as far as to teach Kara the basics of the dish, laughing when Kara admitted that her skill in the kitchen was limited to making sandwiches. At one point she grabbed the camera and set it aside, dragging Kara into the kitchen, giving instructions and lessons as she swayed her hips to the music.
(It was silly, it was lighthearted, it was fun, and Kara couldn’t help it.
She forgot she was there to make a film.)
And as the days and weeks dragged on, when Lena showed off her skills at the piano—apologetically explaining she hadn’t had time to really play in months—or when she told Kara about her very ‘nerdy’ stamp collection or even when Lena seemed to ignore there was a camera between them and she began to talk about her day and her hopes for the weekend, Kara forgot that it was a job. She forgot that she was supposed to be making something, paying attention to more than Lena’s smile or the way her eyes lit up whenever she mentioned work she was particularly passionate about.
Somewhere along the way, Kara cared more about the opportunity to spend time with Lena than she did the film itself.
More worryingly, that realization didn’t even bother her.
x
“Why filmmaking?” Lena asked one morning, pushing coffee and toast towards Kara with a tiny smile. The camera was still in its bag, untouched since Kara had arrived nearly an hour earlier. “Why not journalism like your cousin?”
“My cousin and I,” Kara began awkwardly, adjusting her glasses, “well, our relationship is a little strained, I guess.” She didn’t need the slight tilt of Lena’s head to know that Lena wanted her to keep going, to explain further. She let out a soft chuckle and rubbed her forehead with the tips of her fingers. “Um, so my parents died when I was twelve. And Clark sort of...left me? I went to live with the Danvers instead, and they bought me a camera for my birthday.” Kara grinned at the very memory, still able to feel its weight in her hand, the eyepiece against her eye. “It was one of those old camcorders, do you remember? The ones with the tapes? I drove them nuts, filming literally everything. I don’t think they ever saw my face for the first few months I was with them, it was constantly behind the camera.” She didn’t explain why she wanted to document every moment with her new family, but judging from the way Lena’s eyes softened, she understood anyway. “From there it became serious. I started making films. School projects, etc. Now I’m here.”
“Why documentaries? Why not something like...oh, I don’t know, action movies?” Lena prodded, looking curious, looking interested, looking like the answer mattered.
Kara just shrugged, suddenly not able to look Lena in the eye. “I guess there’s a part of me that wanted to take after Clark.”
x
“How long have you been working for Ms. Luthor?”
“Um, this December will make seven years.”
“As her assistant, you have remarkable access to her. What’s she like?”
“Driven, ambitious, works way too hard. I don’t think she’s ever taken a holiday or even a break...but um, maybe don’t say that in the film.”
“Artistic integrity, remember? She works hard, that’s clear. But what about personally? Her relationship with you and the other employees? What kind of boss is she?”
“She cares a lot. A few years ago, before Lex Luthor, well. You know. Before all that, LuthorCorp was facing serious losses. Mr. Luthor wanted to just get rid of entire departments, but Ms. Luthor said the research was vital, and more than that, the researchers were important. She convinced her brother to keep them on—she won’t admit it, but it was more than being persuasive. She paid for it out of her own pocket.”
“So you’d say she’s charitable?”
“No, she’s passionate. And she fights for the things she believes in. Ms. Luthor likes to say that charity implies pity, and she doesn’t do anything out of pity. She just does what’s right by people.”
“Some would disagree, they’d argue that LuthorCorp, and by extension its new iteration, L-Corp, don’t care about people, but about profits. Do you think that’s a fair assessment of the company you’ve devoted seven years to?”
“Look. I get it, people are suspicious of L-Corp because it used to be LuthorCorp. But it’s not just a name change. When Lena took over, she gutted her company. There’s not a single program left from Mr. Luthor’s time as CEO. L-Corp is all Ms. Luthor.”
“So if L-Corp is Ms. Luthor, who is Ms. Luthor?”
“She’s a woman who’s been hurt all her life, Kara Danvers, and whose only goal is to keep as many people as she can from hurting too. Sometimes I just wish she realized she doesn’t deserve to be hurt anymore either.”
“Oh.”
“Also, I don’t care about your artistic integrity, that last bit does not go in the film.”
x
One afternoon, when Kara was dangerously close to dozing off on the couch in Lena’s office—camera turned off and set aside, not really needing more footage of Lena working at her desk—Lena suddenly jumped to her feet, an excited gleam in her eyes.
“They’ve done it,” she said, the smile forming on her lips so wide that Kara found herself smiling back.
“Done what?” Kara asked, fairly sure this would lead to Lena’s refrain of ‘that’s company business and I’m afraid you’re not privy to that information’ but instead, Lena looked at her appraisingly, then rolled her eyes.
“If I allow you to bring your camera in R&D, do you swear not to film my ongoing projects?”
“You’re going to let me film in R&D?” Kara said excitedly, jumping to her feet and grabbing her camera.
“Kara, do you swear?”
“Yes, yes, of course, Ms. Luthor. I absolutely swear.”
And the next thing Kara knew, she was filming in the one place she’d been told was off-limits, capturing the lab and Lena talking to her researchers animatedly about the advancement they’d made in gene therapy, not entirely surprised when Lena shoved the scientists towards Kara and urged them to brag about their achievement—while also warning them to be as vague as possible—and then sank into the background, clearly thrilled to have her scientists as the center of attention.
And later, when Lena decided to actually take a lunch hour as a ‘reward’ for the great strides L-Corp had made, she took Kara along, bought three different appetizers, and smiled her wide smile before she said, “It’s Lena, by the way. Just Lena.”
Mouth still bulging with the three potstickers she’d practically inhaled, Kara couldn’t manage much more than a nod, but later—when she was alone—she tried saying the name aloud, and it sent a shiver down her spine.
x
“Mrs. Luthor—”
“It’s doctor, actually.”
“Oh, I’m sorry. Dr. Luthor. You adopted Ms. Luthor when she was four, is that correct?”
“I’m afraid I don’t have time for this nonsense. I consented to this interview only to say one thing: Lena was always the more clever of my children, but she’s foolish and soft, and this silly film is yet another example of that.”
“You agreed to meet with me to just say...that. Okay. That’s um. Fine.”
x
As the weeks dragged on, Kara had little reason to continue filming. Her deadline with Cat Grant was fast approaching, and she had more than enough footage. All that really remained was editing, of putting the final pieces together. But she found herself filming anyway.
Every day, she’d make her way to Lena’s apartment, making flimsy excuses about how certain footage was no good, or had been corrupted, and that she needed retakes of Lena doing ordinary things (like reading the paper, cooking dinner, or talking about her day). She knew that Lena could tell her excuses were just that, but mercifully, Lena didn’t seem to want to call her out on it, merely gave soft reminders not to stay up so late every night to edit (the ‘you could just as easily stop wasting your time here and be editing during normal hours’ going unsaid).
(Jess had rolled her eyes when Kara came by L-Corp and Lena mentioned offhandedly that Kara somehow hadn’t gotten a shot of Lena entering her building in all the time she’d shadowed the CEO, and wasn’t that odd?)
But what Kara knew, what made her stretch out these moments as long as she possibly could, was that once the final product popped into existence, once she showed Lena and got her okay to send off to Cat Grant, that was it.
No more Lena.
And that terrified her.
(So she gathered more footage, fruitlessly hoping that the final product would never be ready, dragging her feet at every step.
She edited, studying Lena’s every expression, tried to pinpoint the exact moment she’d started to fall for the not-so-detached CEO extraordinaire, and wished it didn’t all have to come to an end.)
x
Two days after Kara had sent Lena the finished film, she got a curt email from the CEO herself with only three words: come see me.
Jess gave no indication about how her boss was feeling when Kara arrived, merely stared evenly at Kara and gestured with her head for her to just go on in. When Kara tried to ask her, Jess shook her head, pointed at the door to Lena’s office, and made a shooing gesture.
“It’s odd to see you without a camera,” Lena said when Kara sat down across from her, trying to keep her hands from fidgeting.
“It’s odd to be in here without a camera.” Kara took a deep breath. “Did you watch it?” she blurted, unable to keep it in. “What did you think?”
“You’re really fond of certain themes,” Lena said, then she raised her eyebrow. “You also filmed quite a bit when I had asked you not to.”
“Artistic integrity?” Kara tried, and Lena...laughed.
“I don’t know if I agree with the way you portrayed me,” she said slowly as her amusement faded. “You took a lot of liberties.”
“I was very faithful to the subject of the film, Lena.”
“What do you think you were trying to say?” Lena asked, waving off Kara’s comment.
“What meaning did you get from it?”
Lena studied her for a moment, as if she was trying to read Kara’s mind. “I’m not some selfless genius, Kara.”
“Is that what you think the film is saying?” Kara asked her, not rising to the obvious bait. “Like I said, Lena. I was very faithful to the subject of the film.” For a long moment, Lena didn’t respond, and Kara felt the worry she’d managed to push away since sending the film to Lena creep back in. “Does this mean you don’t approve of the film?”
“Hmm?” Lena said, distracted. “No, I’ve already sent it along to Cat Grant, giving my okay. Even though you broke our agreement, I can’t deny the final result was very favorable to me.”
“I wouldn’t have made something that wasn’t completely true,” Kara said, somewhat hotly, most of her irritation bleeding away with the knowledge that Cat Grant was in possession of the final product, that the rest was up to her.
Lena smiled, eyes soft, and she nodded her head almost incredulously. “No, you wouldn’t. I know that.” She cleared her throat, seeming a bit nervous. “But I was thinking. I’ve been missing our talks about your work, and I know you don’t like talking about what you’ve made, but perhaps you’d make an exception for me. Would you be willing to give me a private showing of your film? Give me all the insider secrets? I know your subject quite well, it would be a fun exercise.”
Kara’s heart slammed to a stop, the jump-started at the sight of Lena’s amused eyes, that tiny curve of her lips. “A private showing, huh?” Kara mumbled, feeling a little dazed. “I still won’t tell you what I was trying to say.”
“That’s completely fair.”
“But I suppose I could give you some insight on my thoughts.”
“Only if you wanted.”
“It may have to be more than one session,” Kara said, trying and failing to stop the spread of her smile. “There’s a lot of footage you know.”
“So it’s a date?” Lena asked, and Kara couldn’t help her eager nod.
“It’s definitely a date.”
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hi hi ! first off, just a tip if you'd like more requests/asks in general you should prob turn on anon since this is like the only time i've sent a non-anon ask. but anyways, i'm assuming requests are open and i'd like to ask if you would write either just ranboo fluff in general or something like the tommy confession headcanons but w ranboo :D what you've posted so far is great <3
Thank you so much for letting me know! I thought I had anon turned on already, but it’s 100% turned on now! Regarding your request I got a little carried away and wrote both some general fluff and some confession headcanons for Ranboo so this post is a little long... Hope you enjoy! :D
(It’s important to note that these headcanons are a combination of ones pertaining to his Minecraft character in the dsmp and him outside of the dsmp roleplay!)
General Ranboo Fluff
- Dreamsmp Ranboo -
The first time Ranboo cries in front of you is when you confess to him and he is so happy and relieved that you reciprocate his feelings. He even smiles through the pain of his tears as you panic to cover the skin beneath his eyes, so your hands catch his tears to stop the pain.
Ranboo likes to ask if you need any resources from time to time and once you finally give in and answer, he spends the rest of his day trying to collect as much of it as he can. This has led to a few incidents in which you came back to your shared indent in the snowy mountain to find a chest stacked full with polished stone and countless ores. You’ve scolded him but the way he responds with big puppy dog eyes wishing to “just be helpful.” Sets the butterflies caged in your chest free every damn time.
Ranboo in addition to asking you for want you want he is also very observant in noticing what you need. Any tools close to breaking? Brilliant, he’s already got three more of the same tools ready for you to grab when you need it. He also names them using the anvil to some silly super cheesy pet names.
One of his favourite things to do with you is stargaze. You both travel to the top of your snowy mountain and clear out a space free of snow to lie down and simply hold each other. Ranboo has started asking Techno (on the nights you are away) to point out the stars and tell him their corresponding stories. He happily relays all of this information to you in exaggerated detail, looking at you in awe as your expressions change with the twinkling lights above.
Ranboo almost always carries a little umbrella around with him in case it begins to rain. Most of his friends notice and all start to buy him some. He now has a full collection that line his wall just next to the door. It’s those small things that allows him to remember who his real friends are.
Ranboo LOVES having his hair played with. He will fall asleep within minutes of you beginning to tousle his hair as he rests his head in your lap. He may make soft enderman noises, but you don’t dare tell him. Content on keeping that little secret to yourself.
Ranboo has to be kinda careful around snow considering that if it melts it will hurt him. Meaning he has to sit out on any snowball fights that occur. And they occur more frequently than you would think. It usually starts with Phil throwing a rogue snowball at Techno when Phil notices him slumping his shoulders. Which means it doesn’t take long until it’s a full-blown war. You usually find yourself smack bang in the middle of it and have to dive down to avoid getting pummelled in the crossfire. Ranboo will call you over to hide behind Techno’s house. As the onslaught continues between the two. you giggle and commentate over the fierce battle together.
- Outside of Dreamsmp Ranboo -
Ranboo enjoys watching you whenever you are focused on something. He’s incredibly observant and finds himself mimicking the small little nuances he sees you exhibit. He gets incredibly flustered whenever you notice that he’s picked up on them, but he doesn’t bother to deny it.
Ranboo finds himself staring at you a lot. He doesn’t mean to but he can’t help it. You catch him frequently, “Watching me real closely, hm?” He tries to stutter out an answer to defend himself, but you just smile and tell him it’s okay.
Ranboo finds a lot of comfort in doing ‘domestic’ activities with you. However, one of his personal favourites is when the two of you go out to get groceries together. His mum will give him a small list and he’ll try his best to dawdle around the store whilst swinging your intertwined hands to make the visit as long as possible. It makes him think of a future in which the two of you get to do this every single week and that alone warms his heart.
Ranboo always has to be near you, he doesn’t have to be physically touching you but he prefers to just be stupidly close to you. It always makes you laugh when he sits just close enough to you that you don’t touch, so now he has to do it forever.
Your laugh is one of his favourite sounds. To the point that if you giggle or laugh at something, he will just keep doing it over and over again for as long as you keep laughing at it. Which eventually leads to the both of you red-faced and gasping for air.
Ranboo is a terrible cook. But he tries so hard to follow recipes and they always flop. He also for some reason, cannot attempt cooking without making an utter mess of himself. Whether it’s spilling flour all over himself, getting egg yolk splatter somehow in his hair or just spilling copious amounts of milk on the floor so that he slips. This boy is a walking, talking kitchen DISASTER. So now he can only cook with you supervising him. Which turns out, wasn’t as much of a punishment as it should have been. As your tutelage seems to have slightly improved his cooking skills. However, now you also get flour spilt all over you as well.
Ranboo Confession Headcanons
- Realising he likes you -
Ranboo denies he has feelings for you at first. Believing that you’re just a good friend whose company he really enjoys. But the more he focuses on your friendship the quicker he realises he would prefer if you were more to him than that.
This thought alone sends him into a little bit of a spiral for a few days. Grappling with the thought of rejection and the guilt he would feel if he ever hurt you.
He spends most of the time grappling with his feelings he continues to try and act as normal as possible around you. You finding out would be his worst nightmare.
Ranboo realises he has absolutely no history in the dating department and desperately needs some guidance. He may ask Phil on a whim who would try his best to give the poor panicked boy some words of wisdom. Ranboo takes the advice to heart immediately, promising Phil he will update him on how his feelings for you turn out.
Ranboo finds himself writing about you in one of his many journals. He finds putting words on the page seems to help clear his mind. He tries to script his confession a few times. Desperately floundering to find the right words, but he always seems to fall short. He usually ends up scribbling all over those pages until you can barely tell someone had even written on them. Hoping to somehow erase the thoughts in the process.
He even tries drawing you a few times when he finds himself with enough spare time. He doesn’t think they’re any good though. Sure, the sketches look like you, but they don’t make him feel the way you do. When he looks at the page his chest doesn’t tighten because of your beauty, but instead because of the way you’ve made him feel. Which he comes to the sad conclusion is something he simply cannot capture in his words or his drawings. He has to show it through his actions. Not exactly his strong suit. But he’s determined to do right by you. So, he devises a plan.
- Confessing to you -
This boy plans the whole day down to a t, he has multiple back-up plans just in case his first one falls short.
Ranboo invites you over for lunch. Arriving at his place you notice how clean it is. He spent the last few days cleaning it top to bottom.
You spend a few minutes in the house chatting. You notice Ranboo is on edge almost immediately. Shoulders a pinch too tight, his smiles a little too wide and none of them reach his eyes.
You ask what you’re going to be having for lunch and he reveals a wicker basket from his kitchen. “A picnic!” Your heart warms, “I would’ve brought something if you’d told me beforehand.” He smiles at that, “Exactly. I even cooked without you, you should be proud.”
He shuffles on his feet a little, wishing to be praised, “We’ll see how the food tastes first, maybe then I’ll tell you how proud I am.” You tease, moving to elbow him lightly. You notice the way his face flushes as you move into his space. His mother appears from upstairs, “Are you two leaving? I could drive you, y’know!” “No thanks mom!!” He is quick to grab your hand and practically drag you out of the house and away from his all knowing mom.
The bus ride is on the longer side and you find yourself feeling brave enough to scoot a little closer to Ranboo. “Hey, is it okay if I?” You gesture between your head and his shoulder, the cute, shocked expression he sends you causes you to grin. “Uh s-sure!”
You softly press your head against his shoulder, “Thanks, pretty comfy shoulder you got here should’ve asked you to share it sooner.” You tease, nuzzling his shoulder lightly just for a reaction. And you get one alright, his skin goes such a lovely shade of red all the way up to the tips of his ears. You giggle softly, trying your best to hold it in and failing miserably.
You even manage to fall asleep despite your own heartbeat quickening at Ranboo’s closeness. You are tapped awake by him, “Hmm?” You rub one of your eyes knowingly appearing adorable and the way he looks at you makes it all worth it. “It’s our stop soon, we gotta get up.”
You nod and lazily stand and he follows suit. Only for the bus to brake abruptly, promptly shoving you into his chest. He wraps his arms around you quickly to steady you whilst you desperately cling to the wicker basket, “You okay?” You both mumble to each other before laughing it off and nodding. “Oh crap.” Ranboo grabs your free hand and you both scramble to get to the front of the bus to hop off. Sparks fly up your arm at the extended contact, even as you jump off the bus.
Ranboo happily leads you to a spot he had picked out earlier in the month. A soft patch of grass below a large willow tree that now sways softly in the warm breeze. You set up your carefully packaged feast with haste now that your stomachs are grumbling.
Ranboo forcefully tries to make himself relax knowing you’ve probably noticed his tense state by now. But you choose not to push him on it, taking an educated guess on why he’s so stressed.
You are quick to compliment his cooking skills when he divvies out a freshly baked quiche. Even though you know his mom for sure did most of the work. It’s the thought that counts. You hope that may snap him out of the stupor he seems to be in. However, no such luck.
“Hey Ranboo, do you want to talk about something?” Ranboo goes into full panic mode. He did not have a plan for you asking something like this. He thought you weren’t confrontational!! You watch as his expression changes rapidly. You look away, “You don’t have to tell me, it’s okay. I just thought you might want to-“
He takes one of your hands in his. Why is he doing this??? This isn’t part of the plan at all! “I…” His throat goes dry. All those hours obsessing over what he was going to say to you are sent out the window when he finally meets your eyes.
“I think I like you.” He hasn’t realised he’s even said it until its waaaaaay too late. Your eyes widen, you didn’t think he’d actually admit it to you. You squeeze his hand as you watch his eyes seem to lose focus, “I like you too.” He is silent for several long moments until he starts blinking rapidly, “Huh!?” The look of utter surprise on his face causes you to burst out laughing.
“Wait, wait, wait you’re serious?” He grabs your arm as a grin slowly starts to creep onto his face. “Sure am.” And as you meet his gaze you realise that his grin actually reached his eyes, for the first time in a long while.
“So, you gonna kiss me now or what?” You tease as his face shines a dark red. “W-well I, uh-“ His stuttering only allows for you to sneak closer and press a firm kiss to his cheek. Somehow, he grows even redder and you sigh pleasantly. “My heart definitely made the right choice with you Ranboo.”
Meanwhile Ranboo is too busy freaking out over the fact that you weren’t even meant to find out he liked you until you were stargazing together later tonight. His plans are utterly ruined! But as you squeeze his hand again to bring his thoughts back into the present, he wonders that perhaps spontaneity isn’t such a bad thing sometimes.
~My ask box is always open if you’ve got any requests or just want to vent about the dreamsmp lore!~
#mcyt#ranboo#x reader#ranboo x reader#fluff headcanons#mcyt x reader#confession headcanons#mcyt imagines#mcyt headcanons
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slipping into little space ; preferences
warnings — fluff?? mentions of nudity. hints a t sexy times
characters — andy barber, steve rogers, bucky barnes, lance tucker, syverson, august walker
a/n — THIS IS A DDLG FIC,, was inspired by this ask! to the anon who requested for it i hope you like it and tell me what you think!
their love language | with their little | when you’re insecure
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Though the Thanksgiving dinner she was preparing was only for her and Andy, Y/N couldn’t help but stress and fret over almost every single thing; she wanted their first celebration of the said holiday to be perfect. Hence why she has been cooped up in the kitchen for almost the whole day, even though the dinner was still tomorrow. She baked a cheesecake and it was now cooling up in the fridge, the vegetable she decided to cut today so come tomorrow all she had to do was cook them, and now as she was marinating the turkey she found herself getting whiny and irritable. Andy entered their home quietly and observed his girl for a little while; her constant texts provided him updates about how hard she was working to perfect their meal tomorrow. And by the looks of it she had been working too much that her entire system was already begging for a break. “You okay in there, baby?” Hearing his voice caused Y/N to look up at him, her eyes glossy and her mouth curled up in a semi-convincing smile. Hanging his jacket by the coat hanger, he also dropped his briefcase by the door and sat on the couch.
“Come on over here, baby,” He called for her and patted his lap. Y/N opened her mouth and was about to say no, but a stern look from Andy had her not continuing with that plan and instead she just removed her apron, leaving it on the counter, and plopping herself down on his lap. With her chest pressed against his, the lawyer then rubbed her back comfortingly, “I know you had a busy day; haven’t you, baby?” Hearing her mumble yes against his clothes, the man could only chuckle as he further coaxed her, “You can rest now, baby. You can stop being a big girl now; you can be my little missy again.” As if his words flipped a switch, she did find herself ridding of any remaining thoughts about their dinner and instead complied with his request — which was more like a demand. Peering up at him, her eyes were now wide but weren’t glossy, “Hi dada, I missed you.” Pleased with how his girl decided to let loose, Andy planted a deep kiss on her lips and after doing so he peppered kisses all over her face, “I missed you too, little missy. Now how ‘bout we both go take a bubble bath?”
One of August’s hobbies involved him fixing up his bike or adding whatever gadget he felt would look good on his bike. And since he was given a few weeks off, he took the time to get his hands oily and tinkle with his bike — but really the only reason why he was busying himself with the said vehicle was because his lovely girlfriend was busy with her own workload. Wiping his sweat with the shirt he had earlier discarded, August glanced at the clock and saw how it was already nearing the time they usually ate supper. Once entering the inside of their home, he headed straight for the office and was surprised to hear muffled cries coming from the room. Years of doing field work had allowed him to slip in easily without Y/N hearing him; he then listened closely to see if she had been talking to someone that made her cry, but after failing to hear her or someone else make a sound besides her sniffles, it was then that the CIA agent decided to intervene, “What’s wrong, Y/N?”
Her shoulders rose up and down in shock from her boyfriend’s sudden presence — by now she should have been used to his stealthily ways, but her crying lowered down her guard. She weakly pointed to her desk where pens, highlighters, papers, folders, and her laptop were scattered, “Work just got to me; it’s silly.” August, however, didn’t think of it that way and instead was worried his girl might have been overworking herself. Walking towards her, he grabbed both her hands so she could stand, “You’ve been such a good girl huh? Doing her work and working hard,” Part of Y/N was glowing from the praise and reveling in it; while the other part of her was going to complain to him how she still had more work to do. But just as she was going to do so, August lifted her chin so he could look at her, “How bout we eat dinner, hm? What would you like, little one? Some dino nuggies?” At the mention of her favorite food, she nodded her head up and down as she squealed, “Yes, daddy, I want some dino nuggies for supper!” Smiling he wrapped an arm around her shoulders, leading her away from her cause of stress and into the kitchen, “Alright then, some dino nuggies for my little one only because she’s been such a good girl; perhaps a sippy cup as well and some ice cream sandwiches for desert.”
Bucky remembered how he needed some more hair ties for his long hair; Sam somehow thought it was a bright idea to involve his hair ties for one of his pranks wars with Scott. As he and Y/N were on the hair product aisle, he ordered her to stay put by the cart as he quickly grabbed what he was looking for. Though she wasn’t permitted to walk around, her eyes did the wandering and once she had set her sight on a My Little Pony shampoo. She was able to hold herself back from physically cooing at it; Bucky placed some of the hair tie packets on the cart and noticed how his girlfriend’s eyes were trained onto something. “You want that, sweetheart?” Shocked with how casually he offered it to her, she found herself nodding with excitement. Chuckling, the super soldier grabbed a few bottles into their cart and told her how they should get going to pay and go home already.
As they both had paid already for their grocery items and were now driving to their home. “Thank you for buying me that shampoo.” Bucky nodded as he began driving, placing a hand on her thigh, “You can let loose now, sweetie. We’re going home now,” And with that Y/N found herself playing with his hand, a telltale that she was beginning to let herself become little again. “I love you, tătic, I can’t wait for our bath time later.” As they were stopped by a relight, Bucky reached over and planted a kiss on her forehead, “Me too, sweetie; but don’t forget about our playtime alright?”
When Y/N found out that Steve volunteered to be the overall head for the Avengers’ Thanksgiving outreach program, she decided to help along and shoulder half of the responsibilities that had been put on the hero’s shoulder. Which led them to the current situation they were in — they both were sorting out the food that had been cooked by the other team members and agents. “Okay, turkey, veggies, pasta,” Y/N listed out as she put the food in the bag and laid out in front of Steve so that he could place a greeting card on the basket before wrapping it up. “This makes it the 100th basket we did,” Steve took note as he was preparing the next card.
The next few minutes were filled with hums from the two as a song played on the background while continuing on with their duties. Perhaps it was how repetitive the task got or tired Y/N was in overlooking the whole program, she was too far absent in her mind that she dropped some of the potatoes and made quite a mess. Looking over to Steve, she quickly apologized, “I’m sorry, Steve! I didn’t mean to drop it, I just got tired and was distracted.” Quickly putting down the cards he was holding, he made his way to over where she was and hugged her tight, “I know it was an accident, doll,” He felt his sweater dampen slightly with her tears, he didn’t want her to stop her crying but instead just let her cry out her frustrations. “I might have pushed you to work too much, doll.” She lifted her head up from where it rested on his chest and looked up at him, “You didn’t sir; I just wanted to help you.” Wiping the remainder of her tears, he was quick to counter, “And you were a big help, doll. But it’s time we both took a quick nap before continuing our work, okay? You’ve been such a good doll for me.”
Following Sy’s retirement from the army, he and Y/N decided to accomplish step one of their settling down plan and go buy a house. The move from their apartment to the detached bungalow they purchased had been a big one; but one they absolutely loved and looked forward to. Their new home had been filled with boxes — some were the things they brought from their old residence, while the others were newly purchased furnitures and appliances. “Hey Y/N are our clothes upstairs or in here?” Sy wondered after he walked through the first floor and didn’t catch a glimpse of the bag that contained their clothes. “Shit, hold on I’ll check,” She mumbled to herself and looked at the small notebook she had which contained the information about their move. Upon realizing that the mentioned bag would arrive tomorrow afternoon due to a mix up with the moving company, she could only groan out loud, “God, I’m such an idiot!”
Sy heard her from where she was currently sitting on the floor and pulling her hair out from the pantry, “What’s going on, baby girl?” There was an intention as to why the former Captain had dropped that pet name on her; he was already sensing how the whole move had overwhelmed Y/N and that she was reaching her limit of handling it. It was his way of allowing her to destress and engage in her comfort zone. “I’m sorry Captain, there was a mix up and the bag that had our clothes will be brought here tomorrow. The bags that are in the room are the linens for the bed,” She sobbed out and feared that he’d punish her for stupidity. But that wasn’t what was on the veteran’s mind as he crouched down in his knees and held his girl tight, “It’s okay baby girl, today was real stressful for the both of us,” Feeling her nod against him, he tried his best to reassure her that the day’s gone and it was time to rest, “Don’t worry about the clothes okay? At least they’ll be arriving tomorrow.” Kissing the top of her head, Y/N then asked softly, “What do we do now then?” Lifting her chin with a finger he smirked at her, “Well we can go put some linen and blankets in the bed; then we get to cuddle and sleep naked. How’s that sound, baby?”
When Lance brought up that he wanted to give little tokens of appreciation to his gymnasts for Thanksgiving, Y/N brought up that there were a lot of cute items that his students would love. They both were spending their afternoon on the couch; Lance was watching old performance videos of the gymnasts he was training as well as those of the competitors they were up against. While his girlfriend laid her head on his shoulder, scrolling through Etsy and bookmarking some gifts that stood out to her. There were also a few items that she saved that were things she liked — a stuffie, blanket, sippy cups or some pajamas. As she let out a whine about how cute the items were, the gymnastics coach paused the video he was watching and looked to his side, “What’s that all about?”
Pushing her phone to his sight, Y/N pouted, “I was looking at some gift ideas for your students but somehow I ended up looking at these little space items.” The man beside her chuckled as he took the phone and looked at some of the products she saved, “My angel wants some gifts too, huh?” Bashfully nodding her head, Y/N whispered, “Yes, papa, I do want some.” Swiping through some of the ideas she found he then declared, “And gifts you shall receive, since you’ve been a great help to me all the time, angel.” Y/N then shot up from where she was sitting and litter kisses on Lance’s face, repeatedly thanking him for generosity.
#quietmyfearswith#andy barber x reader#daddy!andy barber x little!reader#august walker x reader#daddy!august walker x little!reader#bucky barnes x reader#daddy!bucky barnes x little!reader#steve rogers x reader#daddy!steve rogers x reader#captain syverson x reader#daddy!syverson x little!reader#syverson x reader#lance tucker x reader#daddy!lance tucker x little!reader#henry cavill x reader#chris evans x reader#sebastian stan x reader#daddy!chris evans x little!reader#daddy!henry cavill x little!reader#daddy!sebastian stan x little!reader
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Suga, We’re Going Down
part 15
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Hello, my darlings! Here’s an update for you! I’m off to work on the next part of WTCAD! and just a reminder that @chimchimsauce released her new book this week. Don’t forget to check it out, you can find the link in on her page. love you all!--- chaotic puff
If anyone at Jin hit Entertainment had been asked if Min Yoongi was a family man, they would have said no. Min Yoongi was a terror, a quiet one but a terror none-the-less. He was focused, driven, extremely talented, and a famous grouch. A family man was not a description anyone would have associated with him, and yet Kim Seokjin was looking at a nervous manager who was bringing forward some odd requests that the famous rapper had made. The requests included the acquisition of an apartment building and to bring him listings for modernized hanok houses in Seoul. To make this odd business even more strange, Yoongi had asked that they look into primary schools as well. Jin could understand why the poor man was confused and concerned. It was very unlike Yoongi, which was why the young CEO was on his way to talk to the artist
The problem was to talk to the artist, he had to interrupt dance practice for the new mv, and something about interrupting Yoongi while he was holding a sword was extremely unappealing, but it had to be done. Someone had to ask about the odd requests. Jin was sure that there was some sort of perfectly reasonable explanation, and then they could all move on with their lives.
“Hey, Yoongi!” Jin called walking into the practice room, only to be met with a dark glare from the man who was quite literally holding a sword.
“What?” he growled incredibly displeased by the interruption.
He was moving Y/N into her new apartment today, and Yoongi wanted to be there to help her get settled. She had insisted on doing all of the packing herself, and he knew she was back from classes already and probably hard at work packing up her small apartment. He trusted Jackson with her. He knew he would help her pack up, but that didn’t change the fact that he wanted to be the one to help her. He wanted to finish practice and get out of there as quickly as possible. If he couldn’t help her pack up the old apartment, he could still help her settle into the new one. And flowers, he was going to bring her flowers. She would enjoy that. But Jin wasn’t helping any of these plans come together any faster with his interruptions.
“Can I talk to you for a sec?”
“No.” Yoongi grunted, brushing back his hair as he glared at his hyung.
“It’ll just take a minute.” Jin continued on cheerily even though Yoongi was giving him a look that would have sent anyone else cowering. Yoongi sighed, setting the sword aside and going to get a drink of water as he waited for Jin to get to the point. “So one of the managers came to me saying you’d been making some odd requests.”
“Yeah?”
“Just wanted to make sure that everything was okay. It’s not like you to buy an apartment building, and you’re looking for a house, schools? What’s going on, Yoongi?”
“She has a kid.” Yoongi grunted, flopping down onto the floor for a break while Jin stared at him as though he’d suddenly grown a second head.
“Who has a what now?”
“Y/N, she has a kid.” he repeated. “Toddler. Cute little bugger.”
“She has… a child?” Jin repeated pinching the bridge of his nose in frustration as he tried to take in the new information. “Did you know about the kid?”
“Found out on Saturday.” the other man shrugged, seeming remarkably unbothered especially considering the magnitude of what he’d just said.
“And you’re buying a whole apartment building and a house because?”
“Kid’s dad is harassing her.”
“Okay?” Jin didn’t want to push too hard, but getting information out of the rapper could be like pulling teeth.
“She needs a safe place to go, her and the kid.”
“So you bought an apartment building?” Yoongi nodded. “Then what’s the house for?”
“House is for her and the kid.”
“You said the apartment was for them.”
“House is for all of us. Eventually.”
Jin was dumbstruck as the implication of those words hit him with full force. Min Yoongi, the surliest son of a bitch he knew, had a family. He’d taken a sugar baby, and suddenly he had a whole family. He’d accepted another man’s child to the point he was planning a future around the kid and his mom.
“That’s…”
“It’s not hers.” Yoongi grunted seeing the older man’s head about to burst. “Not biologically. It’s her nephew, but he’s hers now.”
That made a little more sense to Jin. “And the birth dad is harassing them?”
“Showed up at the park by her house without notice. Really freaked her out.”
“She didn’t tell you about the kid?” Jin asked, sliding down next to Yoongi. He needed to sit if he was going to have this conversation.
“She took the job to take care of him. Her family’s not in a good way.” Yoongi explained, taking another drink of water. “She was trying to protect the kid.”
“And you’re okay with this?”
Yoongi shrugged, thinking fondly on his angel and their kid. “She’s a good mom, and he’s a good kid.”
Jin nodded along, still trying to wrap his mind around this. “And the kid actually likes you?”
Yoongi scoffed, but a small smile tugged at his lips. As soon as the kid had decided that he was fine, the kid had been absolutely fascinated by him. It was painfully clear to both him and Y/N that the kid didn’t have a lot of men in his life. That was fine though. He had Yoongi now.
“Why wouldn’t he like me?”
“Cause you’re a grump?” Jin suggested, playfully bumping the other man’s shoulder. “Got a picture.”
Yoongi looked at him in surprise, but he grabbed his phone pulling up a picture of Y/N and Eun Jae he had snapped on Sunday afternoon when the pair had fallen asleep on the couch for an afternoon nap after Eun Jae had run them both ragged around the penthouse playing princesses and dragons all afternoon. Eun Jae had been the brave night protecting the princess, and Yoongi had been made to be the dragon trying to steal Y/N away from her protector. Eventually the little guy had worn himself out, and the family had settled on the couch for a snack and an afternoon cartoon, before both mother and son had drifted off. Yoongi hadn’t been able to resist snapping a picture of his small family.
“He’s a cute kid.” Jin smiled, handing the phone back to him. It was odd to see Yoongi with a family, but even if the indicators were subtle, Yoongi seemed happy.
“Yeah.” Yoongi agreed. “He looks like his mom.”
“So the house and looking at schools and everything, it’s all for them?” Yoongi nodded. “Alright then.” Jin clapped, nodding resolutely. “That clears things up. When do they move into the apartment? And when do the guys and I get to meet the little guy?”
“Y/N moves into the new apartment today. Eun Jae is going to be with her grandmother till Friday, and you idiots don’t get to meet him.”
“What!” Jin squawked , highly offended. “Why not? We’d be awesome uncles!”
Yoongi growled under his breath. “She’s skittish about the kid, and I won’t have you idiots freaking her out.”
“Freak her out! How could I freak her out? I’m world wide handsome, you know? And I’m great with kids!”
“Not the point, Jin.”
“I wouldn’t freak her out!”
“She has every right to be skittish, and I get more time with my kid before you idiots start crowding in.” He huffed, bopping the other man over the head with the empty water bottle.
“Alright, alright.” The CEO surrendered. “Congrats, man. You seem happy.”
“I am.”
“Why don’t you take the rest of the day off. Go help your girl get set up in that fancy building you bought for her.”
Yoongi nodded gratefully as the older man got up from the floor complaining about old bones. He was more than ready to get out of JinHit and go see his angel. He had all sorts of surprises ready for her at the new place, some he could show her and some he couldn’t.
He had the apartment furnished for her, getting some better quality appliances and furnishings for her. His family could only have the best after all. He’d even had the kitchen stocked in preparation for the move. He’d gotten a bunch of new toys and things for the kid too.
Those were all things that he was excited to show her, but he knew better than to tell her that he owned the building, or that he had her entire security team living in the building as well. He knew what she’d say about that. She’d argue that it was too much, that it was unneeded, but he didn’t want to take any chances with her safety or Eun Jae’s. He even had a guard keeping an eye on the kid while he was at the grandmother’s. She’d certainly have something to say about that, but she didn’t need to worry over that. Their safety was his concern now, and he’d do whatever it took to protect his angel and their kid.
With Jin letting him leave early, Yoongi was more than ready to go see his angel. He needed a shower first, but then he was free to go help her settle in. A quick text from Jackson had told him that she was already at the new building. A text from one of the bodyguards he’d hired to look after her had told him that Kim Taehyung had also been trying to keep an eye on her- trying and failing. Yoongi wasn’t about to let him get close to his family, especially not when his relationship with his kid was still so fragile. He hadn’t even known there was a kid in the equation till a few days ago, and he didn’t need the sperm donor showing up and confusing Eun Jae on who his father was. For now, the little boy was safe with his grandmother, who Yoongi had been reliably told was a battle axe of a woman who wouldn’t be letting any strangers or anyone from the Kim family anywhere near that little boy.
Yoongi got to the apartment to find Y/N preoccupied stringing up a set of bumble bee lights around the living room. He’d ordered a ton of stuff for the apartment, all things that he thought would be warm and comforting for her and the kid. It was colorful and bright, and ten times better than her old apartment. It had enough space for Eun Jae to play and for Y/N to do her schoolwork all while being within the safety of a building that Yoongi owned and staffed. The front desk had been given Taehyung’s photo with strict instructions not to allow him into the building. He wasn’t getting near either of them so long as Yoongi had anything to say about it.
“Miss, you should really let me.” Jackson fretted hovering around Y/N as she put the lights up, making sure she didn’t fall.
“I’m fine, Jackson.” she rolled her eyes. “I am perfectly capable of putting up some lights.”
“You could fall!” Guessing from the harried voice of his employee, Yoongi could guess that this wasn’t the first time that Y/N had refused to let him help today.
“I let you put up the paintings!”
“The paintings were already here when you got here!”
“Eh.” she shrugged. “Someone who wasn’t me put them up.”
“Babe,” Yoongi called, startling both of them and accidentally causing her to lose her balance on the sofa as she spun around, but Jackson was quick to catch her and equally quick to set her down again and excuse himself.
“I wasn’t expecting you.” she muttered, shuffling from foot to foot.
“Wanted to help you move in.” he smiled, stepping forward to place a quick, soft kiss to her forehead. “How do you like the place?”
“It’s too much. We really didn’t need something this…”
“You did.” he cut her off, holding out the bouquet of hydrangeas.
“They’re lovely.” she smiled, a little tiredly, but it had been a busy day for her. “Let me get these in some water. I assume that’s what the vases are for?” He smirked following after her as she moved around the apartment. “You didn’t have to furnish it. You’ve already done so much for us, more than what we agreed upon.”
“I wanted to,” he shrugged. “Besides, we need to renegotiate the terms of the contract anyway.”
She turned to him with wide eyes, clearly nervous by the thought of renegotiations. “Nothing bad. Eun Jae puts a new light on things. I want to make sure that you and he have everything you need, give you both some more security.” he assured her.
“You’ve already…”
“It’s not up for discussion, angel.” her mouth clicked shut immediately as she nodded. “Don’t look so grim, babe.” he laughed, tipping her chin up. “It’s just a few little things to take Eun Jae into account.”
“He likes you.” she sighed, letting her sling an arm over her shoulder and steer her back towards the sofa and the half hung string of lights. “There’s not a lot of people that run around with him like that.”
A swell of pride rose up in his chest at that. “I like him. He’s a good kid.”
“It’s nothing major right? The changes to the contract?”
“No.” he pressed a kiss to her messy hair. “Nothing major.” It was just a few things to ensure their future, nothing she needed to worry about right now.
“Thank you again, for everything.” she sighed, sinking into the sofa and curling slightly into his side.
He hummed, tugging her in a little closer. It was cute how she thought that this was big. It was nothing in the grand scheme of things. This was just the beginning for them, and this little apartment was no place for them to raise a growing family.
“Anything for you.”
part 16
#bts#bts fic#bts fanfic#yandere kpop#yandere bts#bts suga#bts yoongi#min yoongi#suga#yandere suga#suga x reader#suga we're going down#yandere yoongi#rapper yoongi#yoongi x reader#dark romance#yandere#soft yandere#agust d
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Summary: Hanks job keeps him away at your biggest time of need when you’re in labour
Warnings: Child Birth
Word Count: 1366
Requested: No
A/N: I'm releasing new character soon, so watch out for them. But in the meantime, my requests are still open for the old ones and the new ones when they are released.
Masterlist
You knew Hank’s job was important, but not imperative enough that he had to miss the birth of his child. But that was the situation you seemed to be in currently.
Having known your due date was close, Hank had been determined about staying at home with you, wanting to make sure you were ok at all times and that he would be able to take you to the hospital when it was time. But you had insisted that he should go to work, considering you weren’t due for another two weeks, and knowing Hank would have been messaging his team throughout the days getting updates on their cases anyways. Nevertheless, he had taken your advice and continued working, promising that next week he would be off, no matter what you said to him. Still being overly cautious as he attended, he had recruited your best friend to take over the role of babysitter, to make sure nothing would go wrong with you or the baby. And so as he reluctantly left each morning, he felt a little happy you wouldn’t be alone, despite trying to get out of leaving before each shift. However, none of that had mattered later in the day.
Being on bed rest for the remainder of the pregnancy, meant light duty on everything in the house, cooking, cleaning, even going from upstairs to down. Your husband had been like the police officer he was, firmly enforcing the rules at all times, and always lightly telling you off when you pushed those boundaries. Today was no exception, wanting to feel as if you were doing something and not just being lazy, so you decided a small bit of spring cleaning wouldn’t hurt anyone. But as you reached up to place a mug on one of the high shelves, you felt the wetness between your legs, a clear indication that the baby was definitely coming quicker than assumed. Shouting your best friend from the other room, she entered the room nonchalantly, thinking nothing of it, only panicking when she saw the scene before her. Chaperoning you to the car, she drove you to the hospital, giving you encouragement every step of the way, as your breathing got heavier and pain worsened.
Arriving at the hospital you were ushered into a room, quickly being examined, before being told it would be a bit of a wait before the baby would arrive. As the doctors assessed you, you had asked YBF/N to call Hank informing him of what was happening. The doctor had encouraged you to walk around the maternity ward to help the process along, and as you strolled, your friend had reluctantly told you she hadn’t been able to get ahold of him but would try again later as well. But the labour progressed quicker than you thought, as you were already fully diluted only two hours after arriving.
By that point you were seething in pain, the contractions barely minutes apart, raising your voice at your best friend, you demanded to know where your husband was, needing him at that moment. She called him again and again, each time with no luck. And so after five failed attempts, she called the district demanding to know where he was and how long it would take him to get there. Finally getting through to someone who could help her, she shouted down the phone to the poor person on the receiving end.
“I don’t care if that information is for employees only, HIS WIFE IS IN LABOUR! NO, YOU LISTEN TO ME!!"
"WELL TELL HIM HE NEEDS TO BE HERE NOW, HIS CHILD IS ABOUT TO BE BORN!"
"I SWEAR TO GOD LADY IF YOU DON’T GET HIM HERE BEFORE SHE GIVES BIRTH I WILL RAIN HELL ON YOU! Hello?” Turning to you, she informed you that he was stuck in a hostage situation and could not be contacted at that moment in time. Swearing back at her, you were fuming, why couldn’t he just have someone contact him and organise a replacement!? But that anger quickly turned into extreme pain as the doctors informed you it was time to push.
The pain was unbearable, instantly making you regret your decision to have a natural birth, wishing you had some pain relief right now. You pushed and pushed every time you were instructed to, each one causing you to get more exhausted by the minute. Screaming through the pain, you turned to your friend, telling her to get Hank now, not wanting to do this without him beside you.
“WHERE IS HE?” You sobbed, both the pain and absence of your husband, getting to your head.
But after forty- five minutes of pushing, the cries of your baby pierced the room, signalling you that you could finally relax a bit, your best friend beside you, smiling like a madman. The doctor congratulated you, handing you your baby after informing you it was a healthy baby girl. Cradling her in your arms, she cooed, bringing tears to your eyes, instantly erasing the hardship of pregnancy and labour you had experienced. The only thing missing was the father of your child.
Half an hour later, your baby had been cleaned up and handed back to you, as you allowed your friend to hold her, introducing herself as their godmother. Suddenly the door flung opened, spooking both you and your baby at the sudden noise, the intrusion being that of your missing husband. He stopped in his tracks, staring at you and your new baby girl, eye softening at the fact you were both alive and healthy. Taking that as a cue to leave your best friend went, leaving you and Hank to wallow in bliss. Walking slowly towards the bed, he reached out to stroke your cheek, apologising profusely for his absence.
“Sweetheart, I’m so sorry I wasn’t here, they didn’t tell me what was happening, but if they had I would have been here instantly, I’m so so sorry.”
“It doesn’t matter now that you're here.” You assured him, just glad that he was there now with you and your daughter. Nuzzling into him you smiled, wanting to finally introduce him to his second child.
“I think they’re someone you need to meet.” Looking down he stared at his child, in pure bliss about the fact he had become a dad again, gently placing a hand on his babies head, running a thumb over his scalp.
“She looks just like you,” he whispered in absolute awe, tears pricking his eyes, as the mini version of you opened her eyes to stare at her father.
“Do you want to hold her?” Nodding his head, you handed over the baby, watching as he held her gently, scared he would hurt this helpless being. He slowly rocked the baby, talking to them about how special she was and how he would do anything to protect her. Looking back up towards your smiling figure, he returned the same expression, telling you how proud he was of you for doing this, especially by yourself, promising that the next child you had he would be there no matter what.
“Hank, I’ve thought of a name for her.”
“Whatever you want sweetheart,” he assured, knowing that you were entitled to this after a hard enough labour process.
“I think we should call her Camille.” You had been contemplating about the name ever since you had been told it was a girl, thinking that this would be a nice gesture to honour his late wife, not wanting him to lose that part of himself. Tears fell from his eyes in utter shock, not thinking you would want to talk about his late wife let alone name your child after her.
“Really are you sure?” Nodding back in response, you knew this was something you wanted, as a tribute to someone who had been so special to him and given so much to your husband for such a long time. Someone who had made him happy for you before you came around, and who you were sure was watching down on you two as you bathed in the perfection that was Camille Elizabeth Voight.
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Sly like a... ? Part 5
[Master list] [Sly Master List] Beta: n/a (at the moment) Rating: All Pairing: Hybrid!BTS x FailedHybrid!Reader Genre: Hybrid au, fluff, action, adventure, angst, drama, slice of life. Some marked chapters will contain mature/smut scenes, BUT they will not have plot in those scenes and are 100% skippable without losing your place in the story. Words: 1.3k
Summary: Human’s strive to be better, faster and stronger looking to animal DNA. Thus Hybrids are born. As the rise for designer and Pedigree Hybrids increase, so do the failed attempts. There is one species scientists are unsuccessful in creating, but, folklore says they have been here all along, hiding and blending in with the humans for many millennia. How clever they are.
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Between the passive-aggressive comments from Namjoon and Yoongi, the absolutely adorable moments from Jungkook, and Hoseok, and Seokjin's loud nature you didn't have a moment to yourself. Pair that with trying to make Taehyung feel comfortable and Jimin wanting your attention. You were running ragged.
Well, when you looked around they all were wanting your attention, each hybrid was a little possessive over you as their owner. Even Yoongi who constantly claimed he didn't want to be a part of any government program or any home in general, would occasionally growl or hiss in the corner whenever Jimin or Taehyung got too close.
You thought perhaps he was the most protective of you as he was severely touch starved and secretly loved the idea of being loved and wanted by someone. He spent his days and nights cold and alone on the streets and having somewhere warm and dry with someone who cared for his wellbeing was filling a missing piece in his life. It must scare him seeing the opportunity there but not allowing himself to fully let you into his heart as he held it so close as it was left frail and weak from his previous hurt.
When the groceries arrived the poor delivery man had to deal with seven very protective Hybrids who hovered making sure that you were constantly safe at that moment. Having a stranger in the house was not exactly fun for them.
"Yoongi?" You looked over the table from the game of cards Taehyung, Jungkook and Jimin had roped you into with their big innocent eyes and swishing tails. You saw Yoongi's ear twitch and his body tensing slightly as he opened his eyes lazily to meet you. You grinned at him watching his tail swish once before it stilled.
"What do you need?" He sat up stretching and walking over to the table and looking over your shoulder at your cards and humming.
"I wondered if you wanted to pick something for dinner, there is a folder in the draw I filled with recipes I know how to cook, but if you want something else I can try to make it for you and also there is another folder of fast food menu's if you want something else?" You said turning your head he was very close his head almost on your shoulder but he restrained himself from the final move to touch you intentionally.
Perhaps he was scared of getting too close and eventually being abandoned once more. Yoongi was looking in the draws and frowning, "I can't find any folders"
Placing your cards down with a warning to the boys, you strode into the kitchen you saw him crouched by the draw searching and you smiled searching for the folder and found it.
"These two purple folders," You handed them over making sure your hands brush trying to encourage subtle touches and his tail swished a few times. Knowing the kitchen counter was obstructing the view of you both from the others you took the chance to show him a bit of much-deserved affection, unable to stop yourself you placed your hand on his soft hair and tousled it with a bright smile.
His cheeks went pink as he ducked his head, his tail was swishing back and forth rapidly and he took a deep breath and stood up placing the folders on the counter. He cleared his throat fixing his expression, not wanting to appear too pleased by the reaction.
Thinking it was best not to overwhelm him you returned back to your card game while he chose something for dinner. Upon returning you saw your cards askew from how you left them and some cheeky grins on the other boys’ faces.
"You sneaky rotten boys, what did I say about cheating!" you laughed shocked, and messed up their hair, the two feline hybrids whining and swatting your hands away to fix their hair back into place. Taehyung was overjoyed his tail rapidly swatting back and forth and leaning in wanting more.
You were scratching his scalp gently and he laid his head down on the table happily his eyes closed in content. Yoongi approached with the book hesitating behind you, not wanting to interrupt and you assumed feeling nervous to ask for something as simple as dinner. He was the type who didn't want to be a burden or feel reliant on you, but you turned.
"Did you find something for our dinner Yoongi?" You encouraged and his cheeks flushed, he held out the folder opened on the page and he shuffled not saying a word not wanting to bring himself to say the words.
"I wasn’t really sure, I picked one at random," suspecting he really wanted the dish but didn't want to seem too keen if you said no. You nodded wanting to give him anything he asked for, you were very good at reading Hybrids having grown up with Jimin and others just like him.
You placed your hand on his pulling the book down and pointing at the dish, "What meat would you like in it, and should we do noodles or rice?"
"I like it with Noodles but if we make it with rice, I can make a lot of fun little side dishes which I like too, what do you like?"
"I am not sure?” he mumbled nervously at the thought of being given an ultimatum
“Good idea, I will start now and we can have all of the above, there are so many of us, it would be nice to have lots of everything,” You looked up at him an idea struck, you were supposed to teach these boys to be independent, “do you maybe want to help me make it?”
“Uh I have never made anything, but I can try, or if it’s too much we don’t need to eat?” Taehyung whined at his words and you laughed.
“You don’t have to Yoongi, I thought you might like to learn for fun, so if every I am not home or if I might get sick or something, you will be able to eat good food” Clarifying that you were in no way trying to condition him into becoming your personal chef.
“I can help,” he nodded, you were still unsure if he was agreeing so as to not get in trouble but you would take it hoping to make the experience fun. “Okay, let’s get all the ingredients out it says, and put it on the counter right here”
“Do you need help with anything?” You smiled, placing your hand on his wave to gently nudge him aside to grab the bottle of sesame oil.
“I can’t find the garlic?” Yoongi was ashamed he had failed already.
“Oh, I bought a jar of minced Garlic to save time, so that’s all the ingredients found” Leading him from the walk-in pantry you lead him to the middle of the kitchen and took an apron, it was black and you slipped it over his head and walked around tying it up. “We can’t have your clothes getting dir-”
It was then you noticed how old and tattered his clothes were, the collar was stretched and the back of his jeans was ripped and stained from where he stood on the legs. Taking a small breath.
“Could everyone make a list of things they want or need in their rooms, in the bathroom or clothing and shoe wise? We can all go shopping tomorrow” Walking Yoongi to the sink you washed your hands together and smiled over at him playfully flicking water at him, he gave a tiny smile and wiped his face on his sleeve.
The two of you got cooking, as you taught him Seokjin sat at the breakfast bar on one of the tall stools and watched intently. It was honestly cute to see them all interested in everyday things, things that Hybrids weren’t exactly expected or taught how to do.
Something as simple as feeding themselves. It was sad how many Hybrids were punished with no food or left to starve so it was nice to teach them how to cook for themselves and put some of that power into their hands.
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