#now i kinda wanna write this.
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AU where instead of Desi, Jack manages to get Cage to come back to fill in for him
#cause at least Cage already knows Mac and his quirks#plus from a writing standpoint its a character we already know and subconsciously trust somewhat#plus-plus less chance for the forced romance bc of the pre established dynamic#ignoring the logistics of actor schedules and contracts and whatnot#now i kinda wanna write this.#maybe desi can still join the team just not as jacks replacement#just like a supplemental additional member to help out#but with Cage as Mac's main overwatch now#i think he would gel better with her#although of course nobody can be jack#macgyver 2016
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listen, lowkey, I feel like sevika would love interacting with a feisty!reader. like, I get why people headcanon her as preferring a partner who's more submissive or, like, lenient with her. but, I don't know, something tells me she'd relish in having a partner who gives her a hard time. someone who she can bicker and argue with back and forth, someone who doesn't just ride with her shit no matter what. she'd like having someone who actually challenges her, and questions her stances, opinions and strategies. someone who gets her to reflect on her actions and give them even more careful consideration than she already does on her own. someone who makes her think even harder.
and aside from a moral standpoint, she would just playfully love it too. something about you looking up at her with a glare whenever she messes around with you has her abdomen stirring with desire. she feels like a teenager again, vying after the attention of someone who is constantly tiring of her. but, she can't help it. she likes when you punch her arm after she makes a cheap shot at one of the guys she's gambling with at the last drop. when you scoff at something tough she says, and teasingly coo that she's just a big softie, dammit, she can't help but feel like one with the way your words are affecting her. when she jokingly wraps an arm around your shoulders, you shrug her off with an eye roll, and when she props her elbow on your head as though it's an armrest, you pretend to bite at her wrist, to which she laughs and wiggles the mechanical fingers, saying, "you sure you wanna do that?"
sometimes, she tries to flirt with you. she'll ask you to go on a walk with her, or sit with her in her corner of the bar when she does repairs on her arm. hey, who said romance is dead? there've been times where you smile, heave a sigh and drawl out, "well, since there's nothing else better to do," which usually incites her pulling out a chair for you and gruffly sitting on her own, getting to work. it's nice, really. you chatter away, she learns more about you, gets more intrigued, then you leave, and she feels just a bit more hollow. it's a vicious cycle. but, she can't resist going back to it, over and over again. especially when there are little moments where it feels like her feelings might be returned. like when she asks you to do one of the above, and you scoff and say, "why don't you ask one of the girls you saw at the brothel today?"
it surprises her the first time, to say the least. but, she grows to like it. a lot. the way you stiffen up next to her when another woman eyes her with desire, how you snap and glare at her when you hear from babette that sevika paid a visit the night before. it feels like you already have your claws sunk into her before she even got the chance to ask you out. and shit, does she really enjoy that. how possessive you are, how livid you get with her for showing attention to anyone who's not you.
she nearly likes it just as much when you direct that anger to someone else. an ex-friend you're steaming with rage over, a disrespectful enforcer, someone who gives sevika, or actually anyone else in the undercity, shit. the way your nostrils flare with the deep breaths you take, how sweat lines your brow, that motion when your eye twitches. she can't help but admire the intensity of what you feel, and how you have the courage to deliver it to someone who deserves it. whether they fuck with you, your people or the city. and on some occasions, with sevika.
#have sooo many more thoughts omfg but I shall refrain for now#s.writing#my first non-lee post omg :((( this is kinda bittersweet WAHHHH I STILL LOVE AND WANNA WRITE FOR LEE GUYS#sevika#sevika x reader#sevika x you#arcane#sevika arcane#arcane x reader#arcane x you
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IS IT CASUAL NOW?
pairing: vi x fem!reader word count: 14.6k summary: you and vi are both tired of complicated relationships so try the whole friends-with-benefits thing....and maybe forget the whole point of your arrangement in the first place. warning: lesbian situationships (there is so much angst and yearning), brief mention of (internalized) homophobia and struggles with addiction....but mostly cheesy domestic fluff and smut [oral (vi receiving), fingering (both receiving), thigh riding, slight bondage play, switch!vi has my heart] (18+) ! a/n: merry (belated oops) xmas girls and gays <33 i've probably spent way too much time on this but it's my BABY....kinda based on leighton and alicia's plotline in s1 of sex lives of college girls and ofc casual by chappell roan (there are many other chappell references throughout too hehe). also yes i made a mini playlist that consists of the songs that i think reflect this fic's sun, moon, and rising signs....pls enjoy and happy holidays !!!
♪: "angel baby" by troye sivan (sun); "pretty girl" by hayley kiyoko (moon); "casual" by chappell roan (rising)
“not even one week into the new academic year, violet rose atlas, captain of the varsity soccer team, has been suspended from gameplay due to recent unsportsman-like behavior, sentenced to 100 hours of community service, and banned from the local lesbian bar.”
mel removes her eyes from the screen to raise an eyebrow at you. you just shrug and take a sip of your coffee. you glance over at the clock on the wall.
11:09am.
“to top it all off, she’s late,” you declare, trying your best to hide the anticipation simmering in your stomach.
“what’s your deal, anyways? you totally flirt with her whenever she’s at the bar. not even we get that good of service,” gert points out. they’re searching through a stack of cd’s and cassette tapes for something to play.
“that was before.”
you walk over to sit next to gert, taking it upon yourself to choose the music. you settle on jagged little pill; alanis morrissette’s lush voice is a welcomed addition to your conversation.
“our funding is at risk,” you explain. “it’s like the dean assigned her to us because she knew it would end terribly and the board would have an excuse to finally cut us loose.”
“if they need an excuse, they’ll find one,” gert grumbles.
you shrug. “i just think violet is bad news, which is something i’d prefer we avoid..”
“the article does say that she punched maddie nolan in the face during an exhibition game against the piltover knights.”
“see? bad news. literally.”
“well, i think we lucked out,” sky gushes, though her focus remains on finishing her current project. she’s crocheting so fast that you only catch glimpses of her sparkly pink fingernails. you’re sure she’ll be done with this blanket before violet shows up. if she even bothers to show up. “the yellowjackets might’ve lost their captain, but we get to spend quality time with the hottest butch on campus.”
“whatever,” you sigh, though you don’t disagree with that description. you check the clock again — 11:11am — and settle against the worn couch. “since we have the time �� mel, why don’t you read our horoscopes? i’m itching to see what the universe has in store for us today.”
───── ⋆☆⋆ ──────
vi spent the better part of last night crying and getting wasted in her bathtub with cheap dye burning into her scalp.
she just couldn’t stand the memory of caitlyn kiramman’s perfectly manicured nails running through her formerly pink locks as they kissed, tugging on vi’s hair to bring her closer —
enough. fucking pull yourself together.
cait’s moved on, that much is clear, with someone more like her. someone whose last name is on buildings all around the university of piltover’s campus.
so far, no amount of bar fights or red cards or late nights in some random girl’s bed seem to mend the heart that caitlyn shattered to pieces, but vi doesn’t give up easy.
soon enough, she’ll be back on the field, leading the yellowjackets to victory at nationals; she’ll finish all her classes, graduate with honors and have a great plan for an even greater future; all while having amazing, mind-blowing sex that won’t lead to serious heartbreak.
relationships are overrated, anyways.
the first step in this plan: spending 100 hours with a bunch of angry, bra-burning lesbians.
maybe vi will fit right in.
so, vi walks into her community service assignment with a wicked migraine and hands that look like lady macbeth plotted to murder an oil spill, but with her usual confident swagger nonetheless, as conversation echoes down the hallway.
“according to your rising, there will be a much needed spark in your romantic life. my guess is a fire sign is gonna sweep you off your feet.”
another voice chimes in, a gentle rumble. “could that be your sweet jules?”
“i’ve never asked about her chart,” an achingly familiar voice replies. it brings back memories of dizzying lights and strong whiskey coursing through her blood, but something else, too. a sky full of stars and too-sweet alcohol on her tongue. “paula was a fire sign, though, and that blew up in my face.”
“paula was a walking red flag.”
“yeah, well, apparently red’s my favorite color.”
“maybe that was just the heartbreak you needed to bring passion back into your life. do you feel that with jules?”
“i don’t know — maybe? we haven’t had sex yet.”
“passion isn’t just about sex, you know —”
“gert, i love you, but i cannot handle a sex therapy session right now.”
someone else giggles, bright and bubbly. “hm, i wonder what sign our pink-haired hottie is.”
vi clears her throat to announce her arrival, leaning against the doorway.
everyone turns to look at her then, with varying degrees of shock, and vi feels like she’s just walked into an after midnight roommate vent session.
she isn’t sure what she expected the space to look like, but zaun university’s women’s centre is well-lived in, defined by a sort of organized chaos. each wall is covered in posters and collages, multicolored flags and fairy lights; there’s a shelf in the corner with assorted trinkets and books piled high, a table next to it with baskets of condoms, pads, and tampons and informational pamphlets, and a door in the opposite corner, slightly ajar. a vintage boombox placed on the coffee table plays 90s alt rock, circled by mismatched seating with patterned blankets and brightly colored pillows strewn about.
someone with dark lipstick and an eyebrow piercing is drawing on their converse; a dark brunette wearing glasses is draping a blanket over the arm of a couch; another person is scrolling on their laptop, a gold necklace glittering on their collarbones.
vi’s attention is stuck on you, though, the origin of the aforementioned familiar voice: the very hot bartender from sappho’s, where vi happened to be kicked out of not even 72 hours prior.
you’re wearing a vintage wonder woman t-shirt tucked into faded blue jeans with a carabiner clipped to a belt loop. the sleeves of your shirt are rolled up, displaying your array of tattoos — vi’s already decided that her favorites are joan of arc holding her sword, a pomegranate that’s been cracked open, and lyrics from bikini kill’s ‘rebel girl’ (which admittedly, vi had to look up when she first saw). it’s everything vi’s booze-soaked brain had apparently memorized after many nights of staring at you across the bar counter, licking up whatever honeyed flirtations you’d spill from your lips. vi always noticed your hands, too: the many rings you’ve stacked on your fingers, the lavender sprig sprouting from your middle finger and venus symbol etched onto your wrist, the nails that are always clipped short and painted black.
one of those nails is tapping anxiously on your coffee mug, which has a picture of hayley kiyoko as lesbian jesus.
“pink-haired hottie, reporting for duty. though, i might need a new nickname.” vi grins; you roll your eyes. “i’m an aries, by the way.”
“good to know.” the brunette winks not-so-subtly in your direction before walking towards vi and extending a hand, gold bangles clinking together at the motion. “i’m sky, she/her. we had electromagnetic theory together last spring. it’s lovely to officially meet you.”
vi makes a big show of leaning down and kissing sky’s hand.
“nice to meet you, too, sweetheart.”
“such a gentleman,” sky giggles and leads vi to the patchwork couch. she curls up like a cat, and vi follows suit — the couch is cloud soft, and vi tries not to sink into the cushions. “i’m our supplies and communications coordinator.” she turns away from vi to look around the room. “okay, that’s my intro. who’s next?”
the person with an eyebrow piercing nods at vi, a sort of effortless greeting. “gert, they/them.” they snap the sharpie shut after writing ‘the future is intersectional’ on the tip of their toe. “i curate and design our newsletter, the black rose. i’m also in a band —”
“the sirens of zaun. yeah, i recognize you. you’ve played a few gigs at sappho’s.”
vi looks at you pointedly, and you take this as your cue to disappear behind the door, which appears to lead into some sort of office.
gert seems pleased, though. “then you might also recognize our lead singer….”
the person with the gold necklace, who vi does, in fact, vaguely recognize but can’t quite name, closes their laptop and waves at vi. “i’m mel. pronouns: she/her. i mostly deal with the finances around here. and, from what i understand, you’re already well acquainted with our fearless leader —”
mel is cut off by the sound of her phone alarm.
“shit — it’s already 11:30. our set at campus radio starts soon.” mel gestures at gert. gert picks up the bright red guitar case behind them and secures it around their shoulder as mel packs up her leather satchel.
“damn, i gotta get to class, too. the space-time continuum waits for no one.” sky gets up and gathers her things, too, stuffing yarn into a fruit-printed tote bag. “it was nice meeting you though.” she pats vi’s head affectionately before throwing out a loud: “see ya later, boss!”
mel and gert offer similar farewells, and you shout goodbye from the other room before the three of them are out the door. vi expects you to reappear a few moments later; when you don’t, she ventures into the office.
it’s smaller, but just as decorated as the lounge space. there’s a desk that seems to be more storage than actual use, littered with piles of books and old copies of the black rose. you’re sitting on a fluffy rainbow carpet that looks like every member of sesame street stitched together, writing something in a sticker-covered notebook.
“so, violet —”
“vi’s fine,” she tells you. she decides to sit on the floor next to you rather than the zebra striped chaise lounge.
you nod, rip a page out of your notebook, and hand it to vi. there’s something a bit too intimate about knowing what your handwriting looks like before even knowing your name.
“this is a run down of everything you’ll need to know, but real quick: we do feminist film fridays and trivia tuesdays on alternating weeks; our radical reads book club meets once a month, along with our slam poetry group, and we have a bunch of other events in between — workshops, art builds, discussion groups, and so on. sky keeps everything in the centre stocked, and occasionally the rest of us will pitch in when organizing a charity drive. our newsletter publishes the third wednesday of every month — gert puts it together, but we print in pairs since it could be a lot of work for one person. we have team meetings once a week to share updates, make sure we’re all on the same page, stuff like that. any questions?”
“wow, okay. that’s a lot.”
you smile. “i’m sure you’ll be able to keep up, varsity.”
“so….where do i fit in?”
“that depends on you, really,” you tap your glitter gel pen on your notebook, thinking. “like, i’m assuming you’re not well versed in feminist literature.”
vi puffs out her chest. “based on what assumptions? i’m not a dumb jock.”
“yeah, i know you’ve made the dean list ever since your freshman year.”
vi raises an eyebrow. “keeping tabs on me, wonder woman?” she teases.
you laugh. “don’t flatter yourself. sky’s the one who mentioned it to me. so, unless you mean your very large, unpaid tab at sappho’s...”
“the bar i was kicked out of, you mean.”
“well, yeah, because you —” you take a deep breath. “not the point. anyways, we don’t have a complete schedule for book club, so you can maybe take the lead on one of our meetings. do you have a favorite author?”
vi smiles at you sheepishly. “ah…..you got me there.”
“thought so,” you smirk and vi covers her blush. “if you’re curious, this bridge called my back is a good place to start. oh, and audre lorde is a classic and a personal favorite…..” you pause when you catch vi staring at you. she wants you to keep talking, to appreciate the way your eyes light up so enthusiastically, but you blink away, and a veil of professionalism falls back onto you. “sorry. anyways, we’re having trivia tomorrow — would you be able to help us out with that?
vi nods. “sure.”
“sweet.” you check your phone. “i’ve got a coffee date, so i should get going.”
“wait — you never told me your name, wonder woman.”
“well, it’s not diana prince,” you quip before finally introducing yourself.
“nice to finally put a name to the face.” vi winks at you, standing up. she extends a hand to guide you up. your hand is cold against her skin, your metal rings even colder.
“i’ll see you around, varsity.” before you’re out the door, you turn back around. “oh, and vi?”
“yeah?”
“don’t be late.”
───── ⋆☆⋆ ──────
you had stepped away for a quick smoke break — a habit you knew you had to kick — but you’re so fucking drained and it’s only wednesday.
you were up all night bickering with your girlfriend. it started with her admitting that she really doesn’t want to meet your friends, which transitioned into her asking you to not talk to anyone about her or your relationship, which prompted you to make a (maybe slightly insensitive) comment about how she’s welcome to stay in the closet but has no right to push you back in.
needless to say, you did not get any sleep.
you’re about to walk outside, and finally get a moment of peace, when your phone rings. it’s your sibling, and the fact that they’re calling instead of texting tells you that this conversation is about to be (A) exhausting, (B) infuriating, or (C) both.
the correct answer is C.
it’s the same story over and over again: your dad drinks too much, your mom is absent. it hadn’t been this bad when you were growing up, but you suppose you’d been around to ease the damage, or at least step in and take care of your sibling as needed.
“just — take a deep breath. you can come stay with me for the weekend, okay? it’ll be good for you to get away from the chaos for a bit….we’ll go apple picking if the weather’s nice, maybe start working on your halloween costume — whatever you wanna do.”
“you know, i’m not five anymore,” they mumble, stifling a small laugh along with some tears. “but…okay. that sounds nice.”
you smile to yourself, shoulder pressing against the door. “it’s a plan then. we’ll sort out the details later. and, don’t worry about mom and dad — i’ll take care of it. love you.”
you hang up and exhale as you finally push the door open, happy to finally get one moment to breathe.
except, just as you’re greeted by a crisp breeze on this beautiful late september evening, you’re also greeted by the sight of vi pressing someone against the brick wall, their legs wrapped around her waist as she kisses their neck.
something ignites in your abdomen, familiar after many nights of seeing vi at the bar, charming her way into another woman’s bed. except, it’s definitely not jealousy, this time.
(okay, maybe it is; but only a bit.)
they spring apart upon hearing the door slam closed. you recognize who vi’s with — maya, a sophomore who’s frequently attended women’s centre events since last year. she’s always been friendly with the team, but never this friendly.
“oh my gosh, i am so sorry!”
“you don’t have to apologize,” you tell her sincerely. her cheeks are flushed, and she’s busy smoothing down her skirt, clearly trying to distance herself from vi, who’s leaning against the wall nonchalantly. “i just need to talk to violet, so do you mind giving us a sec?”
you wait until maya disappears inside to cross your arms and glare at vi.
“so, it’s violet now, huh?” she teases, wiping red lipstick off her smirk.
“you were supposed to be helping facilitate this workshop,” you note.
“well, it is a queer sex ed workshop.” vi rolls her eyes. “i was giving maya a hands-on experience.”
you grit your teeth together. “and you just had to do that now? like you just had to go down on that third year during trivia last week?”
“well, see, i don’t have a ton of free time, and since i’m not allowed at the local lesbian bar….” she trails off, looking at you pointedly. “i’ve had to resort to multi-tasking.”
“multi-tasking.” you let an exhausted, bitter laugh slip from your lips. “you’ve showed up late to every single event in the past few weeks, and once you’re there, you’re either on your laptop, getting drunk, or hooking up with someone. tell me, violet, as captain of the yellowjackets — if someone on your team was acting like this, what would you do?”
vi narrows her eyes at you, like she can’t believe what you’re asking, and admits, “i’d call them out, tell them to do better.”
“right. and if they kept giving you empty promise after empty promise? you’d have to do something more drastic, even if you didn’t want to, yeah?”
no response.
shaking your head, you take out a cigarette. there’s only silence when you flick the lighter open and light it between your lips. you inhale deeply, letting the smoke enter your lungs, exhale slowly, and decide: “i’m gonna ask the dean to reassign you.”
“fine by me,” vi scoffs, but you swear that something close to disappointment flashes across her face. “clearly, this isn’t working out.”
“clearly.” you take another drag of your cigarette, and as vi walks back inside, you can’t help but try to get under her skin. you’ve had a bad week, between family drama and turbulence in your relationship with jules, and you’re just sick of people not giving a shit. “the year’s already started, so i doubt there’s something available. which means you’ll remain on academic probation until spring.”
and, okay — you do get some twisted satisfaction in how that makes vi stop in her tracks. you’re leaning against the wall, and she strides over to stand in front of you, her jaw and fists clenched.
“i’ll miss the whole tournament.”
you shrug, and blow smoke in her face. “i’ve given you plenty of chances.”
“but the team needs me —”
“you should have thought of that before you fucked up, varsity,” you snap. vi’s eyes widen; you’re usually more level-headed. “you’re cocky, irresponsible — ”
“i lost my scholarship,” vi blurts out, prompting you to pause, the cigarette millimeters from your lips.
you blink at her, blood still roaring in your ears.
“i…don’t know why that’s relevant.”
vi just sighs, so deeply that you feel it in your bones. you haven’t seen this side of her before — no flirtatious smile, no overconfident posture. instead, she slips to the ground, knees pressed to her chest. feeling a bit guilty for pushing her buttons, you slide down next to her. you offer her the cigarette, but she shakes her head.
“i…i’m going through a shitty breakup. i’ve been lashing out, and i lost my scholarship. i haven’t asked my parents for money, because the last thing i want is for them to worry about me. so, i started picking up these odd jobs to make ends meet, and the hours are a bit crazy so between school and practice and — fuck, there’s also shit going on with my sister that i won’t even get into now, but it’s a lot — and i also need to do this because i let my team down and i need to be there for them, whatever it takes, and i’m just so fucking —”
“exhausted, yeah.”
you can see more clearly now — the slump in her shoulders, the shadows underneath her eyes; you see her more clearly. you realize that you might have more in common with violet rose atlas than you initially thought.
“so the laptop —”
“finishing assignments.”
“the drinking?”
vi juts her chin out at your smouldering cigarette. “we all have our vices.”
“and the sex?”
her lips curl into a sheepish grin, and she shrugs. “we all need to relieve stress.”
you clear your throat, blinking away from her gaze and trying to ignore how you can feel warmth radiating from her body, so close to yours. “right.”
vi runs her hand through her tar-black hair. that should have been your first hint — nothing says lesbian breakup more than terribly dyed hair and questionable decisions.
“look, i know i can’t do everything, but i have to, and i’m still trying to figure out how.”
“well….as far as excuses go, it’s not the worst,” you admit. “thanks for telling me. i know that couldn’t have been easy.” you take a deep breath and get to your feet. “i stand by what i said earlier, though — this isn’t working out. you just can’t tell us that you’ll be helpful and not follow through. it means a lot, to a lot of people, that there’s a space like this on campus. mel, gert, sky— they all work so hard to make that happen, and that’s something i need to protect. i’m sorry.”
“wait.” vi grabs your wrist before you can leave. “i’m sorry. really, i am. i promise to do better.”
“you’ve made that promise before,” you point out. “why should i believe this time will be different?”
“because…you’re right. i’ve been too caught up in myself, in what i need, in what my team needs. i can see that you really care about your team, though, and i should have respected that. they’re — you’re — amazing, everything that you do to make people feel safe and heard and loved. i’m sorry for taking that for granted.”
wow. okay.
you did not expect that. you’re hoping that vi can’t feel your pulse quicken at her words, but you’re glad that she’s holding on to you, keeping you steady.
“yeah, well…flattery’s not gonna get you far.” you clear your throat. “but, you’re obviously going through a lot right now, and it can drive you crazy, feeling like you’re the one who —”
“has to keep everything together,” vi finishes, sliding to the ground once more. you follow. “seems like i’m cracking under pressure, this time. fucking everything up.”
“you’ve got a reckless streak.”
“must be the aries in me,” she laughs, softly. “apparently it’s my Ieast attractive quality. along with my stubbornness and selfishness.”
“well, i don’t think that’s the whole picture,” you assure her. vi looks at you incredulously. “i won’t lie and say that your actions aren’t….thoughtless sometimes. you’re more self-centred than selfish—”
“hey!”
“but you obviously feel some sense of responsibility, for your team, your family, for what you think is right. hell — the reason my boss asked me to kick you out is because you started a bar fight with that frat boy who was insisting he had the right dick to set lesbians straight.”
vi scoffs. “asshole.”
“i was about to throw him out, but you beat me to the punch. literally.” you nudge your shoulder against vi’s, and she chuckles. “and, yeah, you’re stubborn, which can be annoying, but it also means that you’d never give up, that you’re willing to keep trying despite the odds, so….”
“so….?”
vi’s looking at you with the widest, softest eyes. fuck, you never expected her to be this gentle, so much so that it you want to melt to her every need.
“i’m hoping third time’s the charm, varsity.”
vi smiles, the most sincere one she’s probably ever given you, and the scar on her lip stretches; for all your talk about responsibility, there’s a part of you who’d risk pushing your already tenuous relationship with your girlfriend to its breaking point just so you could kiss vi, guilt-free, just once. maybe you have a bit of a reckless streak, too.
“thanks, wonder woman. you won’t regret it.”
yeah. you kind of already do.
───── ⋆☆⋆ ──────
vi would never admit it, but one reason she fought to keep her community service assignment here is because she wanted to keep seeing you.
she likes getting under your skin, seeing those pretty eyes roll whenever she strides in late for a meeting, that kissable jaw clench any time you catch her tangled up with someone else.
it almost makes up for all those nights at sappho’s you’d spent flirting back and forth, some sort of unspoken agreement between you to never go further.
sometimes, it’s just nice to have a crush in your back pocket, to know that they’ll always be there to admire and admire you back while others come and go.
the more time you spend together, though, the more vi realizes that you’re not just a fictional character in her head, in a fantasy she pictures before bed — no, you’re tangible.
vi watches as you bring special tea for gert when their period cramps are particularly painful; she listens to you console mel after another fight with her mother and offer advice to sky when she was hoping to ask out her lab partner. vi notices how you prefer your coffee with a dash of cinnamon; and she learns that you had your first kiss with a girl in your freshman year journalism class, and that your first tattoo was done by the same person. a stick-and-poke star on your ankle.
she can hear your laugh, feel the cool metal of your rings brush against her skin accidentally when you’re squeezing past her in a crowded room, smell your perfume when you hug her goodbye. you have stories and quirks and expectations and opinions that vi subconsciously files away as she gets to know you better.
you’re not just a crush, anymore.
you’re a friend.
vi likes having you as a friend. really — she does!
you’re a friend who makes vi’s heart jump at the sight of your name on her phone. a friend who smirks when vi blushes after you tell her she has the prettiest cheekbones you’ve ever seen. a friend who mentions this vibrator that gave you one of the best orgasms you’ve ever had, so vi orders the same one and maybe still pictures you before bed, imagining that you’re using it at the same time. except someone else might be next to you.
yeah, vi’s pretty sure you’re dating someone, but that’s something she hasn’t gathered enough information on.
not that it matters. she wouldn’t be interested in anything serious, anyways, after the mindfuck that was her relationship with caitlyn, and the damage she’s still having to heal from.
though, if that hadn’t happened, vi would have never gotten into a fight with maddie nolan, the second striker for the piltover knights, who taunted her during an exhibition game about how caitlyn is so much happier now that she isn’t disgracing herself with a filthy zaunite. vi would have never been banned from the first half of the tournament and chewed out by coach sevika for fucking up the yellowjackets’ chance at nationals.
vi would have never been put on academic probation and assigned to 100 hours of community service, either.
she certainly wouldn’t have been here, now, in the women’s centre office close to midnight on a tuesday, folding the most recent issue of the black rose when you walk in.
“oh. hey, v.” you drop down on the zebra-striped couch, your tote bag falling to the ground. “i thought sky was gonna be here tonight.”
vi shakes her head, removing one earbud and letting it dangle from the cord. “she’s got this huge chem report due tomorrow, had to meet up with viktor to get it done.”
“right…” you sigh and lie back on the couch, staring up at the ceiling. a few moments pass, and there’s only your steady breathing. “what are you listening to?”
your eyes are closed when vi settles in next to you. it’s a relatively tight fit, but it doesn’t seem like either of you particularly care. vi gently places an earbud in your ear.
you snort, opening your eyes. “you could have just said the cranberries.”
“i’m surprised you recognize them,” vi quips. “it’s not your usual angry girl music.”
“well, sometimes people surprise you. this is actually one of my favorite songs,” you explain. “it’s in one of my favorite movies, too.”
“you’ve got mail?”
you furrow your brows. “when harry met sally.”
vi shakes her head. “no, ‘dreams’ is definitely in you’ve got mail. but, i agree that when harry met sally is a better movie.”
“you’ve watched nora ephron movies and enjoyed them?”
“well, sometimes people surprise you,” vi teases. “i can appreciate a good love story as much as the next person.”
you let out a short, airy laugh. you tilt your head and you’re so close to vi that you’re practically exchanging the same breath. your eyes land on her lips for a millisecond, and vi starts to lean in before you sit up abruptly.
“i could use some alcohol.” you climb over vi and go to the desk, pull out a half empty bottle of fruit-flavored soju from a drawer. you grab two mugs — the hayley kiyoko one, and another with frida kahlo. you stop short of pouring, looking to vi. she nods.
soon enough, you’ve got your legs strewn along vi’s lap, sipping lychee infused alcohol.
“can i ask you something?”
“anything,” vi answers, squeezing your calf.
“why’d you and caitlyn break up?” the question hangs in the air for a second before you add: “if you don’t wanna talk about it though, i understand.”
shit. it’s definitely not vi’s favorite topic of conversation, but….
“i think she thought that i was one of the good ones, that regardless of the way i grew up or the blood that coursed through my veins, i would be her perfect little charity case. people would be like: future president kiramman definitely cares about the poor — just look at the broke angry lesbian she’s turned into her docile wife!”
you suck in a sharp breath. “fuck that.”
“yeah,” vi laughs sadly. “the worst part is that she wanted me to be vulnerable with her, so i was, because i thought the more i opened up, the more she’d love me, but, in the end….i was too messy. i was too much.”
vi hates the lump that starts to build in her throat, the tears that threaten to spill. she cannot cry in front of you —
you grab her hand. your skin is cool against hers, and it eases her quickening heartbeat.
“you’re not too much, v.” your voice soothes her like honey, trickling down her throat. “it sucks, though, when they ask you to rip your heart out of your chest and get mad at you for bleeding out in front of them.”
“shit, i never thought of it so…viscerally, but that’s exactly what it feels like.”
“well you’re not a creative writing major,” you quip. “i know it still hurts — trust me, i know — but your heart was never hers if she treated you that badly. you deserve more.”
is it the alcohol messing with her brain, or does it look like you want to kiss her?
fuck.
vi clears her throat. “why’re you asking?”
you pull your hand away, take a sip of your drink. “jules broke up with me a few days ago.”
you’re single now. good to know.
“what happened?”
“i caught her kissing someone at a bar. a boy.” you roll your eyes. “maybe she just wasn’t ready, which is fine, but when we had it out, she told me that what we had isn’t what romance is supposed to feel or look like, which sucked. especially after being so….vulnerable with her.”
“you offered her that bleeding heart of yours, didn’t you?”
you click your tongue, pouring some more soju into each mug. “course i did, v. and it didn’t mean anything in the end. because relationships suck.”
“i’ll drink to that.”
you cheers, keeping eye contact.
“and you know what?” you take a big, long gulp. “i know that relationships aren’t just about sex, but i’ve been having to get myself off for months now and sometimes, i just want someone else to —”
“take care of you?”
vi sips her drink, watching you mull over her words.
“not sure if i’d put it like that,” you decide. “i just miss that excitement. when another person wants to discover what makes you feel good, and wanting to learn how to make them feel good, too. i miss having that connection with someone.”
“i’m guessing you didn’t have that with jules, then.”
“ha! no. and paula…the girl i dated before….let’s just say, she didn’t give a shit whether i felt good, in any sense.” you shift in your seat; vi senses there’s a story there, but she doesn’t push. “how about future president kiramman — she take care of you?”
vi can’t help but laugh. “nah. i mostly took care of her. she sure liked it when i got down on my knees for her.”
you hum.
“lucky her.”
you wink at vi, and she chokes on her drink.
i would gladly do it for you, if that’s something you want.
“is that a genuine offer? because, if you’re joking —”
shit. did vi say that out loud?
vi’s heart is beating out of her chest, but she sits up straighter to regain some level of composure. she nods.
no use in turning back now.
“i’m serious, wonder woman.”
you stare at her. “i really can’t have another relationship that’s just gonna crash and burn.”
“that’s not what i’m offering. i care about our - our friendship. i care about you.”
you swallow. “i care about you, too.”
“right, and when our friends need help with something….”
“we help them,” you finish. “so, you’re really just talking about casual sex. right now, on this couch?”
“yes,” vi answers. maybe a bit too quickly. “if that’s what you want, too.”
“that’s what i want,” you reply. maybe a bit too quickly, too. “but none of this one sided bullshit: you do me, i do you.”
vi takes your mug, puts it next to hers on the floor, and repositions your bodies so that she’s hovering above you, hips set between yours.
“sounds perfect to me.”
you finally, finally kiss and it feels oddly…familiar. you taste like lychees and nicotine and cherries, burnt sweetness, and your skin is so fucking soft.
“wait.” you tug on vi’s hair and she has to bite back a moan at how fucked out you already look underneath her, all wide-eyed and desperate. “just so we’re 100% clear: just sex.”
vi nods once. “no strings attached.”
“it’ll be casual.”
“we’re not doing the whole relationship thing.”
“promise?”
vi sticks out her pinky, grinning at you sheepishly. you roll your eyes ever so slightly, but still wrap your pinky around hers.
“promise.”
so, you take care of each other. no strings attached.
because that’s what friends are for, right?
───── ⋆☆⋆ ──────
v ⚽
are u busy rn? got out of my lab early and im bored
wndr wmn ☆
yeah, im at work
v ⚽️
leave early. im BORED and HORNY
wndr wmn ☆
ofc you are
v ⚽️
pls u love it
u know #6 isn’t just my jersey number ;))
i’m implying that i will give u 6 consecutive orgasms
wndr wmn ☆
yeah i got that
v ⚽️
so….
wndr wmn ☆
….
leaving now
───── ⋆☆⋆ ──────
“you sure about this, v?”
vi hums, looking up at you through hooded eyes. “isn’t it every girl’s dream to get tied up by the lasso of truth, wonder woman?”
you’re straddling her, still wearing your red and gold bodysuit underneath blue shorts that you’ve decorated with silver stars. your makeshift lasso of truth — really, just some gold rope — sparkles, tying vi’s wrists together to the headboard.
the theme of the women’s centre halloween celebration is always the same — dress up at your favorite female icon — but you’d never seen someone look as good as vi does. she dressed as trinity from the matrix, all tight, black leather and vinyl, showcasing her defined muscles as the gods intended.
now, she’s left in a sleeveless cropped top and black boyshorts, with her pants and jacket thrown somewhere on your apartment floor.
you have a feeling she really liked your costume, too, because she practically begged you to take control tonight.
“if it gets too much, our safeword will be —”
“sappho.” the slight whine of impatience in her voice sends a jolt right to your core.
“perfect.”
you kiss her lips, her jaw, her neck, your lipstick leaving angry red marks. you lodge your bare thigh in between vi’s legs, biting your bottom lip when you feel her already warm and wet, when you hear her whimper as you apply more pressure to where she needs you most. you reach into your nightstand for your vibrator and switch it on, teasing vi’s nipples through her shirt.
vi moans, deep and loud. not even thirty seconds, and she’s already pulling at the restraints, the headboard creaking.
“are you gonna be a good girl for me, violet?” you coo, inching the vibrator lower and lower, feeling her shake underneath you. “because we’ve got all night, and you better not break my bed.”
───── ⋆☆⋆ ──────
“hey, so — i found these in between one of the couch cushions, thought maybe they might be yours.”
you can only spare a glance at the item mel is holding up — you’re grading freshman papers, focused on this one student’s thesis about gender fluidity in shakespeare’s twelfth night.
“oh, those are vi’s.”
“hm. and just how is it that you know what her underwear looks like?”
you stop writing mid-sentence and look up at mel who’s giving you a pointed look.
you and vi had been the ones to clean up after feminist film friday last week, and one thing led to another….
in your defense: vi had been wearing these low cut jeans that showed off her v-line, and you could tell she didn’t have her usual sports bra on because you could see the outlines of her nipple rings through her tight, white tank top. it took everything in you to wait until people cleared out during the credits of the watermelon woman to pin her down and have her whimpering for you.
“i just…guessed.”
“right.” mel rolls her eyes. “so, you and violet are….what? fucking? dating?”
you clear your throat and take a sip of lukewarm coffee.
“we’re keeping it casual,” is all you say.
“are you sure that’s a good idea?”
you just shrug.
“just — be careful,” mel, always the diplomatic one, eases. she walks towards you, sits on the edge of the desk, and hands you the pair of black briefs. “i know we all teased you about it before, but i don’t want to see you get hurt. i’ve seen you get your heart broken one too many times.”
“it’s fine, mel,” you assure her, grabbing the piece of fabric and shoving it at the bottom of your bag. you’re visiting their owner after this, anyways. “vi and i are just friends helping each other out.”
mel raises an eyebrow. “well, you and i have been friends for years and we’ve never gotten that close.”
“that’s different.”
“how so?”
“i appreciate your concern,” you say, avoiding the question. “but it’s fine. nice, actually.”
“it’s your life,” mel sighs. “maybe don’t fuck on our couches anymore, though.”
your cheeks heat up. you turn your attention back to the essay in front of you.
“noted.”
───── ⋆☆⋆ ──────
vi starts showing up at your place after soccer.
she’s allowed back on the field during games now, so she appears with a winning grin, a grass-stained uniform and fresh bruises on her knees. one time, she had the remnants of a bloody nose after a header gone wrong, and you could taste copper when she pressed her lips against yours before she hopped in the shower.
you keep her go-to body wash stocked — bergamot and cedarwood scented old spice — but she always walks out of the bathroom smelling like your mango-vanilla shower gel. sometimes even your coconut shampoo. she slips on one of your oversized graphic tees, drapes a light purple towel around her shoulders to avoid staining your shirt with her cheaply dyed black hair, fading back to pink with each wash. she walks over to the fridge in her soft gray sweatpants rolled at the ankles and cracks open one of the spiced-pear red bulls as you pull ingredients out for dinner. usually something quick and simple, since it’s always a long week and neither of you have capacity for anything more.
vi chops garlic and tells you about her game; you boil water for pasta and tell her about the latest drama between students in your literature class.
you pretend you have all the time in the world.
because you both know that vi’s got the strap packed in her gym bag, that soon one thing will lead to another and she’ll be fucking you with it until you’re both sweaty and spent and exhausted in the best way possible.
you’ve established this routine together, agreed upon several unspoken rules: no pillow talk once it’s over; no actually falling asleep in the other’s bed; no crossing that thin sapphic line between friendship and romance.
no breaking that promise.
───── ⋆☆⋆ ──────
wndr wmn
wanna come over? i’m watching bend it like beckham
v ⚽️
MY FAVORITE!!
i would love 2
but lucky fell asleep on me
we just finished devouring an xl pepperoni pizza
wndr wmn
remind me again why your one-eyed golden retriever likes pizza so much?
v ⚽️
come on it’s cute
[v ⚽️ sent an attachment]
wndr wmn
yeah, you’re cute
v ⚽️
<3
come over here instead?
wndr wmn
omw
───── ⋆☆⋆ ──────
vi whines, and you can’t help but roll your eyes.
“come on — hurry up.”
“you practically begged for this, v,” you chide.
“yeah, but you’re taking too long and your hands are fucking freezing.”
“it’s the irony deficiency, babe,” you quip. “now, are you gonna be a good girl and let me finish?”
“fine,” vi grumbles. she does stop squirming, though. you hum, pleased.
you certainly didn’t miss the way her breath hitches at the nickname. vi’s right hand, freshly polished, tightens on your thigh.
you’re not sure why she called you at 1:27am for your help with this, or why she couldn’t just do it herself, but you’re sitting on her lap, painting her nails the color of pomegranate juice, a color she had chosen from the options you brought.
sure, you were about to turn in for an early night, but the moment you heard her voice through the phone, you rushed over to her place wearing nothing but your pajamas — plaid boxer shorts and a spiderman shirt that vi wore last time she was at yours, and you haven’t washed since.
you stretch time out as much as you can, meticulous in every stroke, but painting her nails doesn’t take much longer. you start to move off her lap — it’s probably time for you to leave — but vi grabs your hips, a playful smirk on her lips.
oh, right. that’s the type of relationship — friendship — you and vi agreed upon.
shit. you’re pretty sure that you’re wearing your days of the week underwear. is it a turn-off that you’ve got on a saturday pair on a thursday?
it doesn’t really matter, anyways.
instead of initiating a kiss, vi takes the bottle of polish from you, swaps it for black, and gestures for your hand. you blink at her, until you realize what she’s asking.
“oh! you don’t have to —”
“you do me, i do you.” vi grins at you. “i thought that was our arrangement.”
you laugh, feeling warmth radiate from your chest.
it’s kind of….adorable, the furrow of her brow, the way she curses under her breath when a drop of nail polish falls onto your skin. she’s surprisingly gentle, too, one of her hands holding yours for support while the other paints.
while she focuses on getting the polish onto your nails in even layers, you busy yourself by counting vi’s freckles.
violet rose atlas has a constellation of freckles sparkling across her cheeks. you hope there’s enough time in the world for you to memorize every single one.
───── ⋆☆⋆ ──────
v ⚽️
do u need more nicotine gum?
im at cvs rn
wndr wmn
yeah that’d be great!!
v ⚽️
ok
i’ll get u the cinnamon one
that’s the one u like right?
wndr wmn
yep!!!
v ⚽️
okay cool
im also gonna get u some of those iron supplements
wndr wmn
my hero 🙏🏽
thank you sm
v ⚽️
ofc
───── ⋆☆⋆ ──────
“that red head was trying to get your number.”
“are you jealous, v?”
vi scoffs, sipping her cherry coke. “of course not. i’m just observant.”
you’d convinced your manager to let vi back into sappho’s. it’s nice, really, to see her back here again.
nice, but different.
gone are the days of staring at her from across the room, where she would be charming someone else, and only flirting with you when she came over to get another whiskey for herself and vodka something for her date. instead, she jokes around with mel, sky, and gert if they’re around, and sometimes brings her teammates in as well to play a game of pool. she usually has one drink, and then switches to something non-alcoholic. sometimes, vi doesn’t even come in for a drink; she just stops by to say hi before a team dinner or a study session.
(it’s fine — never once have you gotten an overpriced coffee from the cafe she started working at mid-october, and you probably stop by once a week between errands. that’s your excuse, anyways.)
so. things are different, but nice.
you lean across the sticky counter. “you want me to get down on my knees for you right now to prove which girl here i’d like to go home with?”
“baby….” vi shifts on the bar stool. it’s hard to tell under the dim multicolored lights, but you’re pretty sure she’s blushing, too.
“i think we both know you’d draw a bit too much attention to yourself. especially when i use my tongue to —”
“my car’s outside.”
you smirk. “my break’s in 15.”
you used to spend your breaks in the alley outside sappho’s burning through a cigarette. now you find yourself knee-deep in the passenger seat, eating vi out like she’s the last thing you’ll ever taste.
“f-fuck,” vi groans.
“feels good, yeah?” you tease her clit with her tongue, sliding two fingers into her easily. you work fast, determined to let her finish before you run out of time.
“so fucking good. i’m gonna —”
she clenches around your fingers; you lap her up eagerly, let her writhe against your face until she’s had enough.
you sit back on your knees once her hips still, wiping your mouth with the back of your hand. you crane your neck to check the time on the dashboard, when you notice something in the footwell.
“vi! i thought i lost this.”
vi grins at you sheepishly, chest still heaving as you hold up the complete works of audre lorde, a tattered book with a well-worn spine and dog-eared pages.
“sorry. i meant to put it back on your nightstand once i was finished.”
you open to where she’s placed a makeshift bookmark — the ticket from an underground sirens of zaun show you’d both gone to. you’ve had this copy since freshman year, the scribble of your handwriting in the margins of practically on every page.
“it’s okay,” you tell her. “you like it so far?”
“yeah.” she grabs the book from you gently, thumbing through the pages. you wonder if vi registers the curves of her own smile, tender and bashful. “honestly, i’m not usually a fan of poetry, but it’s really cool how lorde writes about desire between women in such a tangible way, you know? i really liked this one verse in ‘recreation:’ ‘touching you, i catch midnight as moon fires set in my throat.’ it’s just so - so beautiful, the idea of something so domestic and mundane being almost magical, because that’s what it’s really like when —”
you don’t even realize that you’re staring until vi looks up at you and freezes.
“sorry,” she clears her throat, closing the book and setting it aside. “did i say something wrong?”
you assure vi that she did nothing wrong.
you exit her car, the taste of her lingering on your tongue, the feeling of her keeping your body warm on this cold november night.
───── ⋆☆⋆ ──────
wndr wmn
hey
are you in town during break?
v⚽️
having dinner at my dads’ on friday but otherwise im here
why? u gonna miss me??
wndr wmn
lol
im having ppl over for friendsgiving on sunday
if you wanna join
v ⚽️
hell yeah
can i bring anything?
wndr wmn
just your pretty face
i’ll take care of the rest
turkey, cranberry, sauce, stuffing, sweet potatoes, pumpkin pie…
etc. etc.
v ⚽️
damn!!!!
full course meal
wndr wmn
yep
im basically wife material
v⚽️
pls we’re so over gender norms
but yeah
you are
───── ⋆☆⋆ ──────
vi has never been the type to wait by the phone for a girl to text, or to show up at her place after not hearing from her in a while, worried that she might have done something wrong.
yet here she is, standing outside your door.
it’s cool, though. completely platonic behavior.
she knocks.
there’s no answer.
she knocks again.
nothing.
vi waits another second, leaning her shoulder against the door.
“it’s me, wonder woman,” she tries.
hope flutters in her chest as she hears you shuffle, unchain the lock. vi stumbles as you throw the door open, but she recovers quickly to find you: smudged black eyeliner enhancing the shadows underneath your eyes, hair in disarray, clothes disheveled.
“i’m not really in the mood for sex.”
vi can’t help but laugh, even though your comment feels like a punch to the face.
“wow. figured you would think more of me by now than just some horny teenage boy.”
“look, vi —”
vi?
since when do you call her that?
“i’m sorry i missed the meeting today. i texted mel —”
damn, so your phone does work.
you’ve just been ignoring her calls and texts.
“but i’m just… it’s not a good time, okay? i’ll see you around.”
ah.
the classic generic excuse and non-committal statement combo.
you start to close the door on her before she even has a chance to get a word in.
the hits just keep coming.
thankfully, vi’s always been a good fighter.
“wait.” vi places her palm firmly on the door before you can fully shut her out. “i’m just here to check on you.”
your face remains unchanged.
“okay, well, you’ve checked on me.”
“yeah, i’ve checked on you. you look like shit.”
you glare at her. “well i’m sorry i didn’t have the time to get all prettied up for you. i know that you like me better that way.”
“that’s not what i —” vi inhales sharply. she’s a fighter, but she doesn’t want to fight you. “mel dropped the news — about admin officially cutting our funding. i knew how that would affect you, so….” vi lifts the bag of takeout. “i brought some thai food for us to share. a pomegranate, too, because i know you like seasonal fruit. it’s been a while and honestly, i just….i just wanted to spend time with you.”
you exhale, your eyes softening.
there.
a hesitant smile, an invitation to come inside.
there are clothes all over your floor and dishes piled high in the sink. your desk is littered with empty boxes of cereal and cans of an energy drink that normally you’d never touch. the blanket that sky had crocheted for you — lavender and pink checkered — is unfolded on your couch, your laptop half-closed on the coffee table in front next to two stacks of printed essays — ones marked with purple pen, the others untouched. in contrast, your bed is still perfectly made.
you take the blanket and wrap it around your shoulders, sitting at the kitchen table and curling into yourself. vi busies herself in cracking open the pomegranate, putting the seeds into the last clean bowl in your cupboard. the palms of her arm wraps are now stained a reddish-purple, but she doesn’t care.
vi manages to find two pairs of clean chopsticks for the thai food, and the two of you eat in silence.
“so….” vi starts, watching you stab a piece of chicken before popping it into your mouth. “you wanna talk about it, or….?”
“what’s there to talk about?”
“well, for starters, maybe tell me what’s been getting you into full hibernation mode? we haven’t seen each other in, like, a week.”
“six days,” you correct, chewing a mouthful of noodles. “last tuesday, we played pool during my closing shift at sappho’s. i lost. you made me down two shots of tequila because you’re a menace and you know i hate it.”
“yeah, but i drove you home and tucked you into bed with water and advil for later, so i’m also a gentleman. so, just tell me what’s been going on. we’ll figure it out, yeah?”
“it’s fine,” you grumble.
“clearly, it’s not. just tell me what you need.”
“what i need is to not be distracted,” you huff, avoiding eye contact. “i certainly don’t need you —”
“taking care of you, i know.” vi grabs your hand from across the table. she feels you stiffen on instinct, and then ease into the heat of her skin. “trust me, i wouldn’t be here if i didn’t want to be. so — humor me.”
vi squeezes your hand, hoping to reassure you.
you sigh. “i’ve just — i’ve been spiralling trying to figure out how the centre can keep going with, like, half our required budget, trying to see if we can get some external donors and i still need to finalize the venue and equipment rentals for our last open mic….and….and my sibling called again to tell me that things haven’t been great at home, so i want to go down there this weekend to sort everything out, but my car hasn’t been starting….plus i’m behind on grading, and i told my supervisor i’d have a complete draft ready by thursday and i’m not even halfway done, and that’s the same day we’re having that art build for the climate rally on friday, and i’ve been having the worst cramps since this afternoon, and all i wanna do is pass out and sink into my duvet, but i need to keep going —”
vi squeezes your hand again, this time more firmly. “you need to slow down.”
“i can’t.” you huff. “i have to keep everything from falling apart, and if i don’t….”
vi shifts to the chair next to yours, still holding your hand.
“but you can’t do it all if you’re too exhausted to take care of yourself. from the looks of it, you’ve been living off of frosted flakes, red bull, and zero sleep.”
you shrug. “if that’s what it takes.”
“if that’s what it takes, then maybe it’s not worth it.”
“don’t say that,” you tell her. “it’s all worth it. i just wish it wasn’t so…heavy.”
vi nods, because she really, truly understands. she gives you the advice she can see you giving her in another context.
“you ever think that maybe it wouldn’t feel as heavy if you…i don’t know…weren’t too stubborn to ask for help.”
“there are things that are my responsibility, violet,” you tell her, slipping your hand away. you reach for the bowl of pomegranate seeds, meticulously picking up one at a time with your chopsticks and crushing it in between your molars. “i can’t just pass those off to someone else.”
“fine. but what about other things? like the women’s centre stuff — we’re a team, right? so we’ll figure it out together, divide the labor so you’re not doing everything. and, maybe ask your supervisor for an extension, too? and, well, i don’t really need my car this weekend, so you’re welcome to borrow it.”
you pause, narrowing your eyes at her.
“you said…. ‘we.’”
“well, yeah. i’m part of the team, aren’t i?”
“but you’ll be finished with your hours in a week. there’s no reason for you to stay.”
“of course there is,” vi whispers, studying your face as it morphs from suspicious to something else, something gentler.
her heart is pounding as she waits for you to say something, so vi starts to dig into the pomegranate seeds, the juice surprisingly more sweet than sour. some dribbles out from the corner of her lips, and you reach over to wipe it away with your thumb.
“i’d love for you to stay,” you hum, smiling, and vi feels her chest glow with a brightness it seems only you can bring out. “turns out you give pretty good advice.”
“so…you’ll consider it.”
you shrug again. “maybe. i am very tempted to take you up on the car thing.”
“all yours, if you want it.”
“are you sure?”
“it’s fine, wonder woman. i’ll just carpool to practice — it’s better for the environment, anyways. can’t show up to the climate rally as a hypocrite, can i?” she jokes, and you roll your eyes playfully. “and, i’ll try to fix your car while you’re away.”
“wow. you are a gentleman.”
“gentleman? baby, i’m husband material.”
you actually laugh.
“i thought we were over gender norms,” you quip. “but yeah. you are.”
vi’s cheeks heat up at your statement. you most definitely notice her blushing because you break out into a toothy grin
“i missed you, v,” you admit. “any other words of wisdom?”
despite your tender smile, you look exhausted. vi just wants to hold you through it all, tell you it’s gonna be okay. instead, she settles for placing a gentle hand on your cheek, running her thumb over the deep shadow underneath your eye.
“get some rest, pretty girl.”
a few hours later, you wake up alone.
you have a vague memory of warm arms wrapped around you, a heart beating steadier than yours. your sheets smell like old spice, your apartment smells like fresh laundry. you get out of bed and notice that there are no more dishes in your sink, no more cans or containers on any surface. all the clothes you’d been meaning to wash are now carefully folded on your couch.
there’s a bright pink sticky note on your nightstand next to the keys to vi’s car.
you talk in your sleep. something about stargazing? maybe we can go when you get back.
drive safe. text me if you need anything.
xxx
- v
───── ⋆☆⋆ ──────
zaun yellowjackets vs. piltover knights.
two minutes left in overtime.
one goal standing in the way of their trophy. one goal to end piltover’s monopoly over the title of national champions.
caitlyn probably told her knights to be extra aggressive — win by any means necessary — so it’s been a long game of dirty plays and intentional fouls.
vi always puts her heart into every single game, but this time —
this time, it’s personal.
zaun’s defense works to regain possession and prevent piltover’s attack. ashe manages to intercept a pass between two knights, and is quick in dribbling the ball until mid-field. she sends it over to vi with a swift kick. vi’s quick on her feet, catching piltover’s defense by surprise, sprinting closer and closer to the goal. she makes it to the penalty box.
this could be the winning point.
vi has it, too. she’s so fucking close, about to fake out the goalie and kick into that hard-to-defend sweet spot — until a sharp, pointy elbow collides with her ribs so abruptly, it knocks the wind out of her lungs. she stumbles forward over the ball, knees skidding onto the grass. whoever it is also steps on vi’s cleat for good measure.
“fuck!” she looks up to see who it is.
of course. it’s maddie fucking nolan, who doesn’t spare so much as a glance as the ref doles out a red card. she nods at caitlyn as she walks off the field, no doubt following her captain’s orders.
her teammates help vi to her feet, and the ref makes sure everyone is in position for the penalty kick.
this could be the winning point. vi just has to ignore caitlyn’s icy stare from a few feet away, and the heart threatening to beat out of her chest.
vi takes a deep breath.
she looks to the stands. among the crowd of screaming fans, zaunites and pilties alike, is vi’s family. they’re cheering.
you’re there too, sitting next to them.
everyone is staring at vi, waiting for the whistle, waiting for her to make the shot, but the only person she stares back at is you.
you’ve got this, v, you had whispered to her the night before. she couldn’t sleep, so she called you. vi wishes she was back there, now — tangled in flannel sheets, lucky snoring at the foot of the bed, gazing up at the glow-in-the-dark stars stuck to her ceiling until she finally fell asleep in your arms.
but, vi’s on the field.
and this is the winning point.
the whistle blows.
she makes the shot.
───── ⋆☆⋆ ──────
“i told you i wasn’t a jinx!” powder sticks her tongue out at mylo.
she’s all sweat and dirt and adrenaline, but, fuck, if vi isn’t so, incredibly happy and proud of her team, of everything they’ve been through, everything they’ve accomplished.
it almost doesn’t feel real.
just like it doesn’t feel real, seeing you talk animatedly with her sister’s boyfriend, laughing along with her siblings, smiling as you watch her dads hug and praise her.
when it’s your turn to do the same, you practically leap into vi’s arms, gushing about how amazing she was, how proud you are of her.
“this looks good on you,” vi hums, as you pull away from another hug. her fingers play with the bottom of the jersey, and she bites the inside of her cheek to ground herself in the moment. you, with her family. you, in her jersey. “thinking of joining the yellowjackets?”
“i think i’ll leave the soccer to you,” you tell her. “you were amazing out there. guess i should be calling you wonder woman from now on, huh?”
“wonder woman! that’s where i remember you from!” vander suddenly exclaims, stepping closer to the pair of you. silco turns around, too. “you once tried to get into the last drop with a fake id, didn’t you? under the name diana prince?”
“shit,” you laugh nervously, eyes flickering between vander and the ground as if you’re once again a teenager caught in the act. “i….probably did.”
“i kicked you out, told you to go home to themyscira.”
“yeah…i….i remember that.” you nod slowly, furrowing your brows. “except, i didn’t want to go home that night, so i lingered outside,” you continue. you turn to vi, and your face softens. “which was when you —”
“brought two glasses of cherry coke and rum,” vi finishes; she sees flashes of that night as you gaze into her eyes. “we climbed onto the roof and —”
that was her first kiss. vi never even realized until now, but —
you were her first kiss.
“i can’t believe i forgot that.”
“weird, how memory works,” you agree, tilting your head curiously, looking at vi with a newfound interest, like a ghost from your past.
“well, isn’t this a story we’ll be sharing on your wedding day!” vander chuckles, ruffling vi’s hair.
“don’t pressure them, darling,” silco chides, but the smirk growing on his face gives him away. he’s loving this drama. “they’re barely 23 — i doubt they’ve discussed marriage.”
“oh, we’re not —”
“yeah, we’re just —”
“friends,” you say at the same time, careful to avoid eye contact.
vi feels like she might burst into flames at the knowing look vander and silco share.
“well, violet, would your friend like to join us for a celebratory dinner?” silco asks.
so that’s how you’re sitting between powder and claggor, listening to them talk your ear off about the young innovator’s competition. vi’s sitting across from you, next to ekko, who occasionally pipes in.
you’re here, sharing the tradition of a post-game meal with vi’s family at the local pizza parlour.
caitlyn never even wanted to meet vi’s family.
a few pizzas are ordered for the table, and you eat and laugh and sip your soda along with everyone else. you make a flower out of your paper napkin and hand it to isha, who’s on the other side of powder, and she gives you a toothy grin in return. you answer all the standard questions about your job and major and plans for the future.
“after graduation, i’m probably gonna take a break, get some work experience,” you explain. “maybe save up some money for law school a few years down the road.”
“you wanna be a lawyer, huh? you sure you wanna be friends with a felon, then?” powder asks, blowing bubbles into her soda through her straw.
vi coughs, choking on a mushroom.
���powder!”
“what! she never told you?”
you shake your head, glancing over at vi who suddenly finds it hard to look you in the eye. your foot has been pressed against hers underneath the table all night; you pull it away now. she takes a big gulp of water; vi looks over at vander and silco for help, but they seem to be caught up in their own conversation.
“oh, damn! ” mylo adds, leaning over. “it’s a great story!”
“guys, maybe don’t —”
“but it’s a great story!” mylo insists. “shows what a badass you are!”
“she didn’t do anything serious, like murder or anything,” powder clarifies. “it was really just her pissing off some enforcers —”
“rightfully so,” ekko adds.
claggor nods. “we were just kids. they were harassing us for some bullshit, disruption of property or whatever, so vi steps in and things get heated —”
“it takes three of enforcers to get her handcuffed, but she manages to get a few nasty hits in before they send her off to stillwater —”
“she spends three days there —”
“i thought it was two —”
“no, it was three —”
“needless to say, this isn’t the first time vi has been sentenced to community service, but it seems she’s really enjoying it this time, thanks to you,” powder finishes, winking at you.
“well that’s….quite the story,” you finally say, voice steady.
“oh! let’s tell her about the time she stole from some enforcers that were hoarding food —”
as powder continues the story, and you listen intently, it’s hard to read your expression.
are you ashamed of being friends with her? disgusted by her family, her past? regretful that you ever let her touch you, let her into your life?
vi’s stomach turns when your eyes collide; she’s been down this road before, and vi’s scared that she knows exactly what you’re thinking.
she pushes her chair back and disappears to the bathroom before she has to watch you walk away.
───── ⋆☆⋆ ──────
there’s a knock on the door.
“someone’s in here,” vi says. she grips the edge of the counter so hard, her knuckles turn white.
deep breaths.
this isn’t the same as before.
this isn’t caitlyn, who threw vi out like a piece of trash when something better came along.
then again, you never knew this much about vi’s past. you’re well within your right to —
there’s another knock.
“v? it’s me….i have to get going, but i wanted to check on you before i leave.”
“okay,” vi clips. she looks up at herself in the mirror; she had splashed her face with cold water to calm herself down. a drop falls from her chin. “bye.”
“are you sure you’re okay?”
“i’m fine. see you around.”
you sigh, and vi hears you settle against the doorframe.
“violet, let me in,” you press. “please?”
“i’m fine. you can leave.”
“okay, well, i’m not leaving until i see that gorgeous face of yours one more time,” you whisper. “i got all dolled up just for you, and all i wanna do is give you a proper goodbye….”
well, when you put it like that….
vi grabs some paper towel to dry her face and fixes her hair before opening the door for you. you smile knowingly, enter and lock the door behind you.
you lean against the door as vi leans against the counter, the marble digging into her lower back.
“okay, i’ll start because, frankly, i don’t have time to waste,” you state after a few moments of silence. “nothing i’ve learned about you tonight has changed how i see you. it’s just confirmed some things.”
“right. like how impulsive and violent and reckless i’ve always been,” she lists glumly, unable to look you in the eye.
“maybe you are all those things,” you pause. “but, i don’t fucking care. i mean, i do, because it’s part of you and i like who you are. i like you.”
your words do wonders to ease the tension throughout vi’s body, and she feels like she can actually take a breath.
vi’s eyes lock onto yours.
“you do?”
“i like who you are, every part of it,” you tell her. “well, i don’t like that you’ve had to fight your way through an unbelievably fucked up system ever since you were a kid, but the bottom line is that you’re the strongest, most compassionate person i know.”
vi blinks at you.
“funny, i was just thinking the same thing about you the other day.”
neither of you say anything for a minute or so, letting the sentiment linger in the small space between you. once more, you’re the one to break the ice.
“well, you know what they say about great minds….” you step closer to vi. you take her chin between your thumb and your index finger. "can you guess what i’m thinking now?"
vi shakes her head, throat suddenly very dry.
“i’m thinking that i’ve wanted to kiss you all night.”
“what’s stopped you?”
you grin. “i didn’t want to make a fuss in front of your family, but now that we’re alone….”
vi doesn't say anything, but instead closes the gap between your lips.
you kiss her, harsh and messy, tongue and teeth, swallowing her moans as your fingers snake down the waistband of her pants. you pull vi’s bottom lip with your teeth before moving to her neck, nipping along the outline of her tattoo. you bite down harder on her skin, right at her pulse point.
"what’s that you said earlier —” a low groan tumbles from vi’s lips when you start to suck just above her collarbones. another when your tongue soothes over the sting. “about a proper goodbye…?” she tugs your hair so that you’re looking right at her.
it’s quite the sight — your lips swollen, chest heaving, eyes curious and lustful.
“anything you want,” you whisper, all breathless.
vi hums. she slips a hand underneath the frayed hem of your denim skirt, and you gasp as her nails scrape against your inner thigh.
she likes that you’re here. here for her.
"get on your knees for me, sweetheart.”
she pulls down her pants along with her briefs, as you kneel before her without hesitation.
you drape one of her legs over your shoulder, giving your tongue better access to her cunt. vi grips your hair tighter, bringing you in closer, and you moan, sending vibrations up her body.
"fuck," vi hisses. you add a finger, while your tongue works her clit.
you bring her to the edge, stay with her even as her thighs clench around your skull. she expects you to get back on your feet right away, but you stay, adding another finger and sucking her clit. she moans your name.
you pull away slightly. "one more, pretty girl," you promise. your chin glistens with vi’s release; you lick your lips as you gaze up at her through thick eyelashes. "can you do that for me?" she nods furiously, and you get back to work.
after letting her ride your tongue and fingers through another orgasm, you kiss her ankle before releasing her leg. vi pulls you up to your feet, sucks the taste of herself off your tongue.
you pull away slightly, heart racing against vi’s chest.
vi swipes her thumb over the smudged lipstick below your lip. she studies you, admires you, like you’re a fucking work of art that belongs in a gallery, like you didn’t just fucked her through two consecutive orgasms in the bathroom at a pizza parlour while wham's "last christmas" plays through shitty speakers.
"take these off." vi tugs at your tights. you do as instructed, slipping off your underwear as well. she pulls you towards her, and lodges a leg in between yours. your bare cunt brushes against her thigh, back and forth as she guides your hips. "i can't believe you got all dressed up…. wearing my jersey, and this pretty little skirt even though it’s so cold outside. all for me?"
vi flexes her thigh muscles, pushing you down faster and harder. you whimper.
"all – all for you.”
vi feels her pussy clench, with the desperation in your voice, the stickiness of your heat against her skin, the smell of the two of you intertwining. your orgasm crashes into you, and vi holds you through it.
you kiss her ever so sweetly before removing yourself from her grasp, smoothing down your skirt and looking around for your underwear.
"where are my...."
you look over as vi tucks your fuschia thong into the inner pocket of her jacket.
"i'm guessing you'll buy me replacements for christmas."
vi flashes you a shit eating grin before putting on her own underwear. she then pulls up her pants, not wiping your release from her thigh. she likes the idea of walking around with you seeped into her skin.
when vi looks over at you, you’re as fully dressed as you can be and busy checking something on your phone. she only sees a flash of your lock screen, but it’s her. a photo of her and lucky playing at the park; there’s snow, so it had to have been a few days ago.
that doesn’t mean anything, right? people use photos of their friends for their wallpaper all the time.
“i really have to go,” you sigh. you pull a tube of lipstick from your pocket and step closer to the mirror. “hey — do you think we could switch shirts? not sure i should wear this to my next dinner.”
vi nods and you remove her jersey, revealing a matching fuschia bralette. she wonders what’s got you all coordinated — who else you’ve clearly dressed up for.
“so, you’ve got a hot date?” vi tries to act casual as she takes off her jacket, pulls off her shirt, and waits for you to answer. you take your time, fixing yourself in the mirror.
“something like that,” you finally say with a shy smile.
later, when isha’s asleep on powder’s lap in the backseat, vi thinks about how your date might have gone, if you’re taking them home to the same bed vi has fucked you in throughout these past few months.
where do you get off, fucking vi in the bathroom during dinner while her parents are at the table, only to leave for another date, wearing vi’s shirt, too?
“hey, can i ask you something?” ekko asks from beside her, cutting off the angry monologue in her head.
vi reaches over to turn down the music.
“sure, little man. what’s up?”
“what’s the deal between you and wonder woman?”
vi clears her throat, gripping the steering wheel. “what makes you think there’s a deal?”
“oh, please, we all noticed that hickey on your neck after she visited you in the bathroom.”
the car crawls to a stop as the light turns red, and vi adjusts the collar of her shirt.
“we’re just friends.”
“well, powder and i were just friends for ages,” ekko points out.
vi doesn’t notice that the light’s turned green until someone behind her honks. she steps on the gas, but the idiot behind her still cuts in front of her.
“asshole,” she grumbles, throwing them a middle finger for good measure. vi glances to her right at ekko, who’s scribbling something in his sketchbook despite only the streetlamps outside providing light. “so, what made you….realize that you wanted something more?”
ekko closes his book, smiling to himself.
“honestly? it was kinda a million little things, but what it really comes down to is that she’s the only person i could spend every second of my life with, and i’d still want more time. and, in my experience….it’s better to tell someone how you feel sooner rather than later.”
“or, some people prefer to wait a few weeks,” powder mumbles, stirring awake. “nice try, mister, but no interfering. i’m not losing 20 bucks.”
“wait — you’ve bet on my love life?”
ekko smirks. “so it is love.”
vi shrugs, pretends that she doesn’t immediately picture you in your kitchen, making her banana pancakes at 2am when she hears the word love.
“it doesn’t matter.”
because, it really doesn’t matter.
you’re out with someone else right now.
it’s over before it really had a chance to begin.
───── ⋆☆⋆ ──────
cupcake
Hey, Vi
Just wanted to say good game today
You played brilliantly
Violet
k
cupcake
No need for the attitude
I was just trying to be nice
Violet
my apologies!!!
thank you SO much for recognizing my talent captain kiramman
i feel like i’m actually worth something now!!!
cupcake
Bitterness isn’t a good colour on you, darling
Violet
im NOT your darling
cupcake
I’m aware
I saw you earlier with that girl
Are you together?
Violet
idk
are you still with maddie?
cupcake
Actually, we broke up
I was hoping you and I could chat
Violet
what’s in it for me?
cupcake
The chance to reconnect with an old friend
───── ⋆☆⋆ ──────
you can excuse vi no longer attending the weekly team meeting. she finished her 100 hours around thanksgiving, so technically she didn’t need to be there anymore.
maybe you could excuse her ignoring your calls, or leaving your texts on read. it’s finals season, and she did mention picking up a few extra shifts to save up for christmas presents.
but you simply can’t excuse vi walking into sappho’s with caitlyn fucking kiramman, ordering drinks from you like you’re absolute strangers.
“what the fuck, vi?” you seethe.
vi glances at her date. caitlyn’s waiting for her back at a table, the glow of her phone screen illuminating her pretty face.
“what, should i have ordered something else? not every girl likes cherry coke and rum.”
you glare at her from across the counter, but start preparing their drinks nonetheless.
“why are you with her?” you throw some ice in a glass, the cubes clinking aggressively against the crystal. “are you back together?”
vi has the audacity to roll her eyes at you. “why’d you care?”
you catch yourself before saying something you’ll regret, something about liking her more than you definitely should considering the agreement the two of you had made.
clearly, vi doesn’t feel the same way; it’s not worth spilling your guts to her at your place of work.
“because we’re friends.”
“yeah, right,” vi scoffs. “you’re jealous, which you have no right to be because you’re seeing someone, too.”
you accidentally pour a double shot of vodka. you don’t really care, and mix the drink anyways.
“what the fuck are you talking about?”
“i’m talking about the date you went on the night of my championship game.”
“what date?” you slam the glasses in front of vi, so hard that you’re lucky they didn’t break.
“oh, don’t play dumb.” vi spits your name like it’s poison. “this whole thing started because you said you didn’t want a relationship, when really you just didn’t want a relationship with me. you used me until someone better came along. you lied to me.”
her eyes are glazed over, her voice shaking ever so slightly. you’re not sure if you’re more hurt or angry by what she’s saying, but it cuts deep; you continue as though you aren’t bleeding out in front of her.
“i don’t want a relationship with anyone and certainly not with you —”
“excuse me! are we able to order something?” someone with bright green hair and a septum piercing waves their hand in front of your face.
“yeah, just give us a second —”
“look, you and your girlfriend can fight on your own time.”
“she’s not my girlfriend!” you and vi snap simultaneously.
you glare at each other.
vi grabs the glasses from the counter, and walks away.
───── ⋆☆⋆ ──────
it took many brainstorming sessions, many boring conversations with potential donors, and many, many tears, but you managed to secure enough funding to keep the women’s centre going for the foreseeable future.
it was a team effort, of course, so you just want everyone to enjoy this open mic night, the last event of the semester — even though you are weighed down by the absence of a certain someone.
the gallery space on campus that you rented out is both cozy and electric, decorated with fairy lights on the walls, with pillows and blankets on the floor for people to sit and watch performances. there’s a table with drinks and snacks, a corner for people to make art if they’re inspired.
you’re rearranging the food, watching gert perform an original song when mel slides in next to you, wearing a gorgeous white dress with gold accents.
“do you mind running to the office? we’re out of paint.”
“really? people don’t usually use the paint.”
“well, it seems to be quite popular tonight.”
“it’s fine. we still have lots of other stuff. they can just collage or something.”
mel shakes her head. “i really think you should go get more paint.”
“maybe ask sky? i should stay here —”
“you could use a break, too,” mel cuts you off, placing a hand on your shoulder. “you’ve been nonstop all day; the rest of us can hold down the fort for a little while.”
you concede, mostly because she’s right and you don’t have the energy to argue.
when you get to the office, you’re surprised to find the lights on. even more surprised that someone’s already there, sitting on the zebra-striped couch.
“vi?”
she jumps slightly when you say her name.
“mel texted me,” she rushes out like she’s been caught red-handed. “said she needed help with something she’d been planning.”
you frown, until you realize why mel must have sent you here, specifically.
you haven’t seen vi since that night at sappho’s; you’d been quite a mess after your shift, ranting to mel on the phone about how she’d been right and you should have been more careful, how you don’t know what you did that ruined whatever you and vi had, and you really don’t know what you can do to fix it.
you’re both too stubborn to reach out to the other, so it seems like mel decided to take matters into her own hands.
“yeah, i doubt she’s coming,” you tell vi.
“okay,” vi says, but she doesn’t move. “i, uh, i was hoping i’d run into you, though.”
“yeah?” you raise an eyebrow at vi, crossing your arms. “needed another vodka martini for your piltover princess.”
“she’s not — we’re not together.”
“oh,” you exhale. the animosity you were holding towards her evaporates, but doesn’t completely disappear. you watch her, watching you stand by the doorway.
there are so many things you want to tell her, but you don’t even know where to start. you know that you’ve hurt her. she hurt you, too.
but, also:
you miss the cloudy blue-gray of her eyes, the scar on her upper lip.
you miss her.
“do you wanna come sit?”
after being so far away from vi, for what feels like forever, you don’t hesitate to take her up on the offer. your knees brush together as you settle next to her on the couch, a jolt of electricity passing through your body at the contact.
“so, i admit that —”
“vi, you were right —”
both of you stop your sentences short, chuckling nervously. you each urge the other to continue, and only get caught in a similar mess:
“i fucked up,” vi blurts out.
“i lied to you,” you confess at the same time.
an awkward, unfamiliar silence hangs above you; you’re not sure what to do next.
vi takes the leap. she tells you that mel explained everything: that you had to attend a dinner with alumni and potential donors on the same night of her championship game, but you kept it from vi since it was already a big moment for her; that you haven’t been on a real date with anyone else since september. vi apologizes for jumping to conclusions and falling back into caitlyn’s arms, shutting you out when she should have just talked to you.
you’re the girl who was her first kiss, she says. the girl who lingered in a vague memory, appeared in the fiction of her daydreams, and then suddenly became too real.
“i like you. i really fucking like you. and if it has to be as a friend, that’s fine because i don’t want to lose you.” vi takes a shattered breath, blinking back tears. she fiddles with the ring on her index finger, anxiously bouncing her knee. you place your hand there to steady her, and she exhales. “i guess i’m just not sure….when you said you liked me that night at the restaurant….is that what you lied about?”
vi’s practically doe-eyed, waiting for you to respond.
you shake your head.
“i lied when i said that i didn’t want a relationship with you,” you admit, and the hint of a smile dances across her lips. “i had this major crush on you, you know? every time you came into sappho’s….i couldn’t help it. and then you showed up here and we became friends, and then we started….well, you know the rest.”
“duh. i was there,” vi jokes, easing into her usual, playful self.
“i can’t do the whole casual thing,” you continue, rubbing circles into her knee with your thumb. “i know we made a promise, but i just can’t, not with you. it’s like…in every other relationship i’ve been in, i was trying to run out the clock. with you, though, with us, i feel like there’s never enough time —”
vi grabs your neck and crashes her mouth onto yours before you can finish your sentence.
you’ve kissed each other many times, in many different places, in many different ways, but never like this: like you’re both willing to break one promise if it means forging a new one.
“will you be my girlfriend, violet rose atlas?” you whisper as you pull away, lips brushing against hers.
you start to count the freckles on her cheeks as she beams at you, pulls you into her lap.
“i thought you’d never ask.”
#arcane#vi x reader#vi arcane#vi smut#vi#vi fluff#vi angst#vi league of legends#vi fanfic#lesbian#wlw#wlw fanfic#wlw smut#vi arcane smut#vi arcane x reader#arcane smut#arcane x reader#when i tell you this is all i've been thinking about these past few weeks....#like i want to live in this fic fr#im still not sure about the pacing but#just wanted to post it bc i feel like it's reached that point where i should send it out into the world anyways#i hope y'all like it im kinda nervous#i wanna post a holiday-themed fic soon bc 'tis the season so im gonna work on that now...and hopefully have it done b4 the end of the year#also i read somewhere that 2024 is considered the year of the lesbian so let's go lesbians <33#saf writes
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18+! | cw gun play.
johnny’s got a thing for pointing the barrel of his gun against your head while you’re down on your knees, sucking his cock. well, honestly, it started off when he saw the way you reacted to his gun — all wide eyed and flustered — not to mention how wet you had gotten when he had first done it. he had laughed at you, more so in endearment rather than mocking. you were his little freak after all.
it had soon accelerated into him shoving his most favorite pistol into your cunt, staring in awe at the way you coated his gun all wet. fuck, it was the hottest thing ever, watching your hips buck forward while he thrusted his gun in and out of your pussy as if it were some dildo.
“fuck- ye really like it, bonnie? like being fucked by my gun? filthy.” he grunted, trying to ignore the way his cock was straining against his pants, begging to be freed. he’d sure as hell cum in his pants at this rate.
and if you were to point his gun at him while riding his cock? good lord, he'd cum right on the spot, shameless about it too. (perhaps he had learned this little kink of his from his lieutenant, who knows?)
#and if simon REALLY was his gun play kink awakening THEN WHAT#i kinda wanna write that now#johnny bringing simon over so he could share you oh my.#soap x reader#john mactavish x reader#john soap mactavish x reader#cod x reader#john soap mactavish#mikawrites.★
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"I'm going to ask Tommy to marry me." Buck says out of the blue one random evening, sitting in Eddie's living room, spread out in the armchair, sipping a beer, eyes on the TV, where Eddie and Christopher are playing a video game. His tone is even and firm, not even a hint of hesitation, it's not a huge revelation, or even a decision he's made just now. He's been thinking about it for weeks, maybe months. He doesn't know why he says it now, it just slips out - maybe he just needed to talk to his best friend about it.
"Really?" he hears a hint of surprise in Eddie's voice, but when he looks at his best friend, he's still focused on trying to beat his son at the game. He's smiling, sparing a glance at Buck. "That's great, Buck."
"Yeah?" he breathes out, feeling even more settled now. He wasn't nervous, exactly, but still felt kind of like he did when he came out to Eddie. Like he just wanted his best friend to approve, to support him - and he had no doubt he would.
"Of course," Eddie answers easily. "You guys are perfect together, and you love each other, and if you're sure you want to spend the rest of your life with Tommy, yeah, go for it. I'm happy for you," he adds, finally looking at Buck, a soft, genuine smile on his face. Christopher uses this moment to win the game, and Eddie groans at his triumphant yell. "Aw, not fair, Buck distracted me." Both Buck and Chis laugh, while Eddie pouts for a moment, before a smile breaks through anyway.
"Well, I won." Chris shrugs with a grin. "And I think it'd be so cool if you and Tommy get married," he adds, moving his attention to Buck.
"Yeah?" Buck repeats, his smile even wider now. Having two of his favorite people not only really love his partner - Buck's pretty sure Tommy's the first one to spend so much time with all of them together, and it feeling so right - but also approve of Buck wanting to tie him into their family forever.
"Duh, Tommy's the coolest." Chris rolls his eyes. "Better lock him down while you can," he jokes, and Buck gasps in surprise. He's such a teenager.
"Wow, rude. He's not going anywhere." he shakes his head with a laugh. That much he's sure of, for the first time in his life he's not scared of getting left, of his partner getting bored or fed up. He knows Tommy's gonna be right at his side no matter what.
"Not if you put a ring on it." Eddie joins his son's teasing. Laughing, Buck reaches over to the table to pick up a chip from a bowl and throw it at Eddie, who dodges it as it lands somewhere on the couch. "Hey!"
"But seriously, you don't think it's too soon?" Buck asks after a moment, a little bit of nerves seeping into his tone. He's more than sure about wanting to marry Tommy. He's just a little scared that he's gonna freak him out. They have talked about this, about their future, what they want out of this relationship, out of life, but they never really discussed any timelines, and Buck might be a little in his head about this. Hence why he needed to talk to someone about it, probably.
"Buck, you've been together for over a year. Some people get married after less." Eddie raises an eyebrow. "When you know, you know." He shrugs, and Buck releases a breath. Because he does know. He has known for a long time now.
"So you think he'll say yes?" Buck asks, but he knows the answer before Eddie has a chance to roll his eyes with fond exasperation. Tommy loves him. He loves Tommy so much his heart wants to burst out of his chest and live in Tommy's. Tommy is his forever, he's sure of it, and he knows that when he asks, and it's going to be very soon, he'll get a positive answer.
"He'll say yes." Eddie says with a small shake of his head and a wide smile. "Now, two important questions from me: who's gonna be your best man, and do you need help planning and picking out a ring?"
#bucktommy fic#wikiangela writes#platonic buddie#wanted to try writing something short for once#and this one has been on my mind for WEEKS#I need to write some more supportive bestie eddie#(I kinda wanna turn it into a longer fic now ughhh)#bucktommy#bucktommy drabble#kinley#tevan#dailykinley#evan buckley#tommy kinard#eddie diaz#christopher diaz#platonic buck and eddie
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AGH FASHION DESIGNER SUGURU AND MODEL SATORU W A NEW INTERN DESIGNER UNDER THEIR WING 😞😞☹️ - 🌺
WAHHHH I LOVE THIS 🥺🥺🥺 the pining and flirting and slowburn of it all… model!satoru and his favorite designer suguru geto, both of them undeniably skilled and born with an eye for fashion….. well-known and adored……..
designer!suguru who gets tasked with showing you the ropes, who’s always so patient and kind despite your inexperience. diligent with his teaching but also so laidback, so easy to talk to… he looks intimidating, but he’s so polite that you can’t help but swoon a little. and he admires your enthusiasm so much…… grows fond of you soooo quickly bc you’re just such a breath of fresh air compared to the divas he’s forced to work with all the time. he thinks you’ve got real potential and he wants to nurture it.
and ofc you end up running into model!satoru eventually…. bc he’s always hanging around suguru whenever he gets the chance. and he’s maybe a little jealous that you’re hogging so much of his personal designer’s attention, but… he also thinks you’re so cute . T_T like a little puppy following suguru around… so excited to be apart of what you’ve dreamed of for so many years……… he looks into your eyes and sees the same sparkle he had before he made it big, and it makes his heart race.
yeah . i’m just thinking abt the peaceful coffee breaks with suguru….. how he’d insist on paying for your drink, ”since he’s your senior” (he wants to be your favorite </3)…… and how he’d just be so protective over his little intern. don’t get me started on the close proximity with satoru when you’re taking his measurements, the glance and smile he sends your way during an impromptu shoot… the way he always calls for you with a sweet coo of ”how’s my favorite intern doing today?”
😔😔😔 yeahhhhhh. they make me feel ill.
#thank you 🌺 anon my beloved….. i am kissing your beautiful brain#😭😭😭😭 now i kinda wanna write this oh no#my anons keep making my wip list longer this isn’t fair T—T#(i love you all very much)#NO BUT THIS IS SO BIGBRAINED IT’S INSANE#fashion designer!sugu the loml…. model!satoru just feels so natural too#i think they’re both very mature!!!!!!!#there are some aus where i think satoru would lean towards his more bratty hs self#but here i feel like he’s similar to the way he is in canon :3 just. silly and goofy and passionate abt what he does#AND very fond of youth. of people with lofty goals and dreams and starlight in their eyes#(<- has gotten carried away)#YOU GET IT THOUGH i know you’ll see the vision 🌺 anon 🫂🫂🫂 we’re holding hands#i need them both#need suguru to buy me expensive coffee while satoru feeds me pieces of a pastry#for some reason i keep thinking of coffee breaks i might. just be hungry 😭😭😭#ask tag ✩#🌺 anon !! ✩#geto x reader#gojo x reader#stsg x reader#satosugu x reader#gojo satoru x reader#geto suguru x reader
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Little Harry drawing James and regulus holding hands with a heart above them
oh this is too cute 😭
pre-dating or early stages jegulus spending time together with harry, and james has been telling harry that regulus is just his friend because he doesn’t want to confuse the poor kid before he and regulus have properly defined their relationship
but, although harry is young, he is absolutely not clueless. he sees the way his dad and regulus look at each other. so the next time he sits down with his crayons and some paper, he draws james and regulus holding hands, surrounded by little hearts, and gifts it to his dad the next time regulus visits
james and regulus are both flustered and blushing, and little harry just looks so proud of himself. that picture hangs on their wall for years to come, long after james and regulus get married and regulus officially becomes harry’s second dad
#i kinda wanna write a microfic based on this now#maybe set in the bgtm universe#(yes i do still desperately want to revive bgtm)#marauders#jegulus#starchaser#jegulus raising harry#james potter#regulus black
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Bruce is actually really attractive, and I have enough reasoning to make a list
He's:
Tall (. Tall enough to hit his head on the vault doorframe)
Long-legged
Has a straight nose bridge
Has high cheekbones (more noticeable in 2nd pic below)
Has a strong jawline
Sharp eyes, but they aren't small (plus eyebags if you're into that)
Overall, he has strong, attractive facial features
Has broad, refined shoulders. You can tell he works out (or he did, when he was alive)
Even has a thick, muscly neck
He has MUSCLE. Is SCULPTED. NOICE. VERY NOICE. (nice arms. Nice shoulders. Nice neck. Nice legs. Nice butt-)
(There are actually panels where you can see some of his muscles. Other than those already shown here, he's got bricky thighs-
-and in the panels where we first get his name dropped, he's got those shoulder blades too-)
The one time we see him smile, and he actually has a scary one
Has small, kinda sharp pupils, and his eyes remind me of a cat. We only ever saw him tense or defensive, so his resting/listening face is really cute
Other than the physical appearance stuff, he also:
Takes shit without batting an eye (patience, knowing it's just how Kudo is, etc)
Kudo being all "Cut the crap Bruce and give it to me straight", after Bruce tests his blood and is rightfully Concerned because they just faced AFO
Put up with Kudo's experimenting and testing over Yoichi's transferable Factor
Did ya'll see the look on Kudo's face when he realized he had Yoichi's Factor/will? Kudo was going to start in nonsense and Bruce just dealt with that.
Also something I noticed when looking back at the images here; Bruce has bandages on his arms in the void. But not when he faced AFO in the sewers.
Were he and Kudo cutting their arms open in their experimenting over Yoichi's theory? Is this why Kudo has two gauntlets instead of his one? Why we never see his bare arms in the void? That he always keeps his arms down so there's no slip?
Is smart enough to run blood tests, plus has enough common sense to pick Shinomori as his successor
He picked a guy who avoids society, has an Ability to detect danger so he can always stay away from AFO, is also a coward so he's never going to go throw himself into danger, even without knowing instinctively he stands no chance, etc.
Meanwhile, Kudo chose Bruce, who he played Hot Potato Yoichi with; but he did also trust Bruce, and put the only pure combative Ability in OFA through Bruce.
These two made their choices based on what they valued and saw the Factor needed.
Is logical, analytical, and calm.
He tried advising Midoriya on their Abilities in One For All, especially his own.
Midoriya then tried ignoring him about using Fa Jin for the first time, but found he was right, thinking: "Dammit!! I had [Lady Nagant] right where I wanted her, but... ugh! The Third was right. My parallel Quirk processes are all screwed up!" (ch. 314).
Plus, when Midoriya fixed his processing mistakes, Bruce was analyzing the way he reached his new conclusion. Pure facts, no bias, very calm, just saying it as it was.
We never see him panic. When he's caught by surprise in the sewers by AFO, Kudo, and Yoichi's little bubble event, he immediately reacts. He doesn't falter, he just knows he has to do something right now.
Was more willing to listen than Kudo to Yoichi's beckon, and probably was just following Kudo's rejection of Midoriya
While we don't see Kudo's face, we see Bruce's eyes when Yoichi calls on his heroes. Bruce was more open and receptive, or at least more impacted.
Bruce was also the one to start talking, while Kudo just kept quiet.
He actually communicates a lot
When Yoichi called them to support Midoriya, Bruce started talking to paint a picture of why they thought the way they did, so Yoichi understood where they were coming from.
(Though he seems to beat about the bush sometimes, since Kudo spoke up to be direct on how they couldn't just put their trust in some starry-eyed teenager. Plus, when Kudo tells him to just tell him what's wrong [double Factors])
When Midoriya first used Fa Jin against Nagant, Bruce came out just to tell him he knew what he was trying, but that Midoriya wasn't ready; and Midoriya found he was right. Midoriya just didn't want to listen to him then.
He asks Kudo for clarification after finding Kudo had two Factors in him after the sewer incident ("Just to be sure, All For One didn't touch you, right?") Kudo knew him well enough to go "stop beating around the bush and tell me", so Bruce was probably gonna start with questions, theories, and trying to understand everything in general, before saying "yeah you have two Factors. Don't know why".
Is strong-willed and loyal.
He followed Kudo, even to death, carrying on the cause he started until it ended with him.
Plus, when talking about how AFO needs a strong will to override OFA's own, we first see Bruce, Kudo, and Yoichi.
AFO couldn't steal OFA because the will was too strong for him, and that was back during Banjo's time. Since Shinomori never actually tried opposing AFO and just hid, we can assume the first Three (Yoichi, Kudo, Bruce) already had an accumulation of strong willpower that made OFA un-stealable. Those three are a strong enough foundation, and the main wills, that the other users just become bonuses.
Kudo, also saying that Midoriya needs allies with the same will and drive as him... hey Kudo, you're talking about yourself and your old allies, aren't you? That's why you look at Yoichi and Bruce when you say this.
Not only is Bruce attractive, but he's got good character. THE END.
#yes this is a bruce appreciation post#am i biased? yes. am i right that he has these features? also yes.#hes actually a very attractive person. hes got all the right features for it#plus hes smart (some medical knowledge) is really loyal strong-willed and patient#he puts up with kudo SO much#from being bossed around to taking home yoichis brother to whatever the heck kudo made him do to figure out OFA's transfer properties.....#i didnt think much of bruce originally#then i started doing resistance fic stuff and now hes a fave#hes a little blorbo#that i throw in terrible situations for my own entertainment#used his scary smile for comedy purposes#like when he made a kid cry once. or when a meta child was afraid of him so they bit him#has patience to deal with kudo and co. but also. has enough bite to snark them. is how i like writing him#oh? background character? well lemme just *picks him up* EXPAND ON THAT-#fic stuff: he tries making a good impression on a girl and kudo is ruining it immediately#he doesnt know what to do because the two always banter#kudo: fuck you#oc: fuck me yourself you coward#he sees through a rose-lens that kudo is trying to rip off his face#appeciation kinda turned analysis in general#bruce#kudo#yoichi shigaraki#bnha#mha#spoilers#boku no hero academia#my hero academia#NOT YOICHIS BROTHER. i meant Yoichi / AFO's brother in a prev tag up there but theres too much tags i dont wanna rewrite to fix that#(image limit and tag limit)
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HI, SO.. PERIOD HORNIES STRIKE AGAIN..
This little snippet was absolutely, definitely not inspired by anything irl 👀 Ahem, nope.
.▪︎°•..☆.•
"Uh uh.. not yet, draga."
You let out an arousingly needy whimper. The Lady's voice soft and warm - smooth like whiskey - with such a subtle tone to it that somebody else might have missed the absolute demand behind it. Though, the fact that it cracked ever so slightly when she got to your pet name, only proved that she was just as worked up as you were. But you also knew that Alcina's reserve could far out last yours if she wanted it to.
Another thrust into your aching core and you whimpered again, this time digging your nails into the sheets. The Countess had been edging you for what seemed like hours. A constant ebb and flow of pleasure that had your body absolutely trembling with need.
"P-please."
"Mh.. and deny yourself the honor of coming with your Mistress?"
Alcina smirked as she drove herself into you again, roughly.
"Ah-!" You cried, before letting out a soft sob half whimper. "I'll.. but I can c-come again for you, my lady."
The Countess chuckled at your plea before leaning down, her large frame casting you in a dark shadow.
"You could..." Her breath warm across your ear, a slight hiss to the next words that she gave you. ".. but I told you to wait."
You cursed under your breath and nodded. "Y-yes, Mistress."
"Mh.. that's better."
The large woman hummed in satisfaction before rising to her full height, a flash of crimson and two golden spheres staring down at you. A deliciously wet sound as the length of her cock slowly slid out of you, stretching you around the width of her before it stopped just short, reaching the tip.
"Now..." Her tone almost as dark as the curl across her lips as she readied your hips for impact, the head of her cock throbbing inside your entrance. "Shall we see just how many times I can get you to come for me... my needy little slut."
.▪︎°•..☆.•
OKAY, THAT IS ALL. THANK YOU FOR COMING TO MY THIRST TALK ♡
#theo writes#resident evil village#lady alcina dimitrescu#alcina dimitrescu#lady dimitrescu x reader#now i kinda wanna elaborate on this 👀#maybe 👀👀👀#gods this period thirst is brutal rn 😂#ahem#yeah#short but sweet#👀👀👀#re8 fanfiction
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Last Line Challenge
Rules: in a new post, show the last line you wrote/drew and tag as many people as there were words (or however many you want to tag).
Hi @trees-can-draw!!! Thank you for the tag :] <3 I've been getting back into the Monty centered fic i started writing ages and ages ago dfhkjgfhjf (which is actually why i'm up at , 5am ,, ahem anyways)
"The repairs had gone well, and even with the social nightmare they'd agreed to looming on the horizon, Lark felt a sturdy sort of comfortable feeling deep in their gut that had settled in like a home cooked meal."
I do not know as many people as there are words for this fkjgfhkgf so instead i will shrimply tag @shirajellyfish, @victarin, and @lavenoon (very no pressure tags, feel free to ignore <3)
#tag game#not super sure how to tag this actually#fnaf au like real people do#like real people do#<- the name of the fic :3#i feel like ive been working on this fic for 50000 billion million years#its like 3/4ths done. and the rest is all plotted out. i just have to . Write It. and stop re-writing things#kinda wanna gut the entire plot and re-write everything dgfkkdsj but then i actually look at the thing with my eyeballs#and turns out its not as bad as it feels in my brain#anyhoo i am. going to bed now kfdjgkjdfdg good night
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any bonten headcanons? i just think seeing em all interact is fun
Oh definitely!!! Here are the ones I came up with!
Kakucho is the glue that holds this team together, whenever he takes a day off things become more chaotic.
Pretty much no one listens to Koko's presentations, Koko has a grudge against all of them because of this.
Mikey will sometimes just disappear, like they'll search everywhere for him but won't be able to find him. He always comes back though, the others suspect he has a hiding place somewhere.
Sanzu threatens to use his katana on the Haitani brother's after they tease him about something often.
Takeomi smokes more then he did before, he often says "I'm too old for this" too.
Ran takes a lunch break everyday and refuses to be flexible with it, even if it's an emergency. *Ran calmly sipping coffee while everyone's fighting behind him*
Kakucho was the first to get his tattoo then everyone else just kinda copied him (Mikey's orders)
Mochi isn't caught up on any of the bonten drama, he has no idea what the Haitani's are talking about when they try to fill him in on the gossip.
There's a hole in the wall in one of their buildings where someone obviously punched it but no one has admitted to doing it so it's a mystery.
They're so used to bad assassination attempts that they don't even phase them anymore.
The Haitani brother's insist on taking Kakucho out for dinner a lot (they baby him a bit)
Pretty much all of them have either taiyaki or dorayaki on hand to give to Mikey (it's considered a good idea to carry it in case he's in a bad mood)
One time during a fight, Sanzu accidentally grabbed a taiyaki from his pocket instead of his gun so he just threw the taiyaki at the guy.
Rindou enjoys interrogations a lot since if he gets to do them then he uses his joint locking technique to break their bones one at a time.
Koko has the nicest office
Ran secretly likes it when the police and media publish photos of them (he normally makes sure he looks perfect for this reason)
Sanzu and Kakucho have a rivalry going on (the Haitani brother's love to gossip about it)
The building has accidentally been set on fire at least 5 times
#why do i kinda wanna write about the hole in the wall one now and them trying to figure it out#tokyo revengers#tokrev#tokyo rev#bonten#tokyo revengers spoilers
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Lego Ninjago movie AU where Garm (and everyone else I guess) knows that Lloyd is the Green Ninja and Garm is attacking Ninjago specifically to get Lloyd’s attention. He’s blowing up buildings trying to like stimulate Lloyd’s Oni instincts or whatever. “Come to the dark side Luh-Loyd we have sharks.” It’s a tempting offer. He gets sad if Lloyd doesn’t show up for their scheduled fighting
#lego ninjago#ninjago#lloyd garmadon#ninjago garmadon#lego ninjago movie#crack#this is a joke btw no angst here no siree#Oni movie Lloyd WHEN#oni lloyd#garmadon attacks Ninjago Lloyd attacks Garmadon they both go home happy#Lloyd sneaks into his dads house to pet sharks#picture this concept as like a Tom and Jerry heist#a home alone heist#pure crack#I kinda wanna write it now fuck#garmadon sometimes kidnaps Lloyd and gives him presentations on the benefits of the dark side and embracing evil#“No taxes Luh-Loyd!’’#Koko lets it happen bc having a teenage Oni is exhausting and Garmadon’s volcano is Oni proof
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Another doodle that people like in the discord server :D I hope to see more wings in season 3!
#good omens#fanart#I made this while listening to deftones#and now i kinda wanna write an angsty wing fic#might redraw this properly one day
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Au where a drunk newly 19 year old Eddie shacks up with a girl, not long before he gets together with Shannon. 9 months later a baby shows up on his doorstep.
(I'm sorry in advance)
Not knowing what to do but not wanting to just abandon a baby, Eddie and Shannon take him in. Everything continues as is in canon (to an extent) but now with the extra layer of chris not actually being biologically Shannon's (so her story is even more heartbreaking (I love her, this is not Shannon bashing at all))
Eddie joins the 118 and meets the firefam, all is well. He can't help but think that Buck guy looks vaguely familiar but then again blond white jocks are pretty indistinguishable.
One day, a few years later, their all talking about their childhoods while on a q-word shift. Buck says something along the lines of "when I was little girl" without thinking about it.
Everyone's a little surprised but very accepting obviously.
Later after the shift, when they're alone, Buck needs to find out more on how Eddie feels about him being trans so tells him he can ask him anything. Eddie asks about like when and how he knew and stuff like that. It starts getting a bit emotional cuz of the Buckley parents and whatnot.
So to lighten the mood Buck makes a joke about being a really hot woman and he knew the world couldn't handle it so he had to transition for the sake of humanity. Eddie makes a snarky comment about how that's impossible (and quietly thinks that no way Buck could be hotter as a woman than he is as a man).
Buck takes offense (jokingly) and decides he needs to prove himself. He shows a photo to Eddie when he was 18, not long before he was able to start socially and medically transitioning (he couldn't before because of his parents). He's also not usually this nonchalant about himself pre-transition but it's Eddie and he trusts him.
Eddie's about to make another joke but as he takes a closer look at the photo, he almost drops Buck's phone. Because no fucking way.
Buck thinks Eddie's reaction is to how hot he was and makes a comment about how he knew Eddie would be drooling over him (he tries not to hurt himself too much with that thought, it was just meant to be a joke after all)
But then he realises that Eddie isn't laughing anymore and he's like having a full blown panic attack and shit what just happened.
Meanwhile Eddie's mind is slowly imploding because what the hell is he meant to do with the knowledge that not only has he already slept with Buck, did so when Buck was in a body he was massively uncomfortable with (which makes Eddie feel extremely guilty), but that there's an extremely high likelihood that he's the father of Buck's son.
Not that he isn't completely shocked by this cuz like come on despite all the years of trying and failing to not wonder who Chris's bio mom was, this scenerio certainly never crossed his mind. And yet somehow he can't say he's that surprised, the amount of time people have thought Buck was Chris's dad instead of Eddie becuase of how similar they look. It actually makes perfect sense.
And maybe he'd be more freaked out if Buck wasn't as close to Christopher as he is because seriously he's thought of that man as a second father to his son for the last however many years already, it's actually kind of a comfort to found out he literally is.
It's that though that finally calms Eddie down enough to allow him to breathe normally again.
Buck is looking at him with that look (you know the one) and Eddie kinda melts on the spot.
Now he just needs to figure out how to break the news to Buck without freaking him out so much that he'll leave again.
Cuz that's another thing, Buck didn't want that kid, except Eddie knows Buck and he knows how much he craves a family so why the fuck did he abandon Chris on his doorstep all those years ago (seriosuly is there any adult in his son's life that hasnt left him at least once, god that poor kid). Also how does Buck not know, if he knew enough to know which house to drop the kid off at, how doesn't he recognise him, he hasn't changed that much. Or maybe he does know but hasn't said anything because he doesnt want that. There are so many questions and Eddie doenst know what to do, he kinda wants to break down again but he feels too drained to even do that.
They don't end up talking about it that night, they just sit with each other until it gets late enough that Buck realises he should get going so he's not a zombie at work tomorrow. Eddie let's him leave.
Buck doesn't really get what happened that night, everything was going fine until he showed Eddie that old photo of him. He couldnt help but think that sure maybe Eddie was fine with him being trans as like a passive thing that happened to him, but when Buck forced him to see the changes he'd gone through it got too much? Eddie's pretty repressed and grew up catholic of course this was gonna be difficult for him to accept when he was probably told people like Buck where freaks of nature or somehting (obviously not all Catholics believed that but he's spiraling here)
After many many hours of self-hatred, a long long talk with Maddie (which included a lot of cuddling with his favourite niece), and a metophorical slap round the head from Chim, Hen and Bobby. Buck confronts Eddie about it.
Eddie feels like a peice of shit for making Buck think his reaction was due to transphobia, and he felt even worse when Buck tried making excuses for him.
Eddie realises he has to come clean.
Buck freaks out as expected. However it's not for any of the reasons that Eddie thought it would be.
Turns out when Buck realised he was pregnant he returned home. He hadn't been gone for long and he really didn't want to have to go back already but he couldn't do this by himself and he wasn't about to ask the random dude he'd hooked up with at a party to raise a child with him. His parents were shocked and reprimanded his behaviour but helped him through his pregnancy nevertheless. Buck suspects it was because they that this meant he would finally change his mind about being trans, but if course it didn't, leading to so many fights and leaving a very hormonal Buck in tears everytime.
Buck doesn't remeber giving birth, he doesn't even remember the drive to the hospital. All he remembers is waking up, his parents sitting by his side, Maddie nowhere to be seen (she was never told, iconic that they both ended up keeping pretty big secrets from each other involving a child). His dad looked stoic but somber, and his mom had two perfect tear tracks running down her face, her makeup left unaffected.
Immediately Buck knew something was wrong, it didn't take a genius to figure out what that something was. His parents told him the baby hadn't even taken a first breath.
Buck looked up at Eddie after finishing the tale of the worst day of his life. Eddie was red faced and crying, Buck had never told anyone else that story before, not even his therapist, he knew he looked much worse.
Eddie takes Buck's hands in his own, forcing Buck to meet his gaze, and says with as much love as humanely possible "he's alive". Buck let's out another sob, and God he sounds so wrecked. Eddie repeats himself, "he is alive, Chris is alive, our son is alive"
Before Buck can respond the phone rings, it's the hospital, Chris was in some kind of accident and he's being taken into surgery, they don't know if he's gonna make it yet.
Buck is delirious, he almost wants to laugh because he's just found out that his child that's he's thought was dead for the past 13 years is actually not only alive but the son of the literal love of his life (whos very much straight and does not reciprocate by the way), now might actually be dead. The whiplash is enough to kill a man.
Eddie has gone pale, he looks like he's about to throw up, Buck cant help but think ditto (okay he's still a bit delirious)
They race to the hospital, neither of them should be driving but they're not about to waste time waiting for an uber.
When they got to the hospital, one of the parents of another kid in Chris's class is there. She tells them she was driving them back to hers for the kids' sleepover when a drunk driver smashed into the side of the car, the side Chris happened to be on.
Hospitals are shit. Waiting rooms in hospitals are even more shit. Waiting in a waiting room in a hospital while your son is having potentially life saving surgery and no reassurance that he's going to make it is soul destroyingly shit.
Buck's mind is stuck in a loop of "his first breath was stolen from you, now his last breath mightve been too"
After what felt like a lifetime of misery, a doctor finally approaches them.
Eddie is grasping Buck's hand so tightly he thinks he might break it (hey at least he's already in a hospital his brain provides)
The harmonious sighs of relief that punch out of the two men when the doctor tells them the good news could surely be heard the next state away.
For the second time that day Eddie turns to Buck, with tears staining his face and a wobbly smile and says "he's alive"
#i still have so much more i want to put#but this was never meant to be anything more than a passing thought#it was supposed to be crack guys#i didnt mean for the angst to pile up#this isnt even a fic#but now i kinda wanna write it properly on ao3#or someone else needs to#911 abc#911 show#911 fanfic#911 crack#buddie#buddie angst#buddie fanfic#eddie diaz#evan buck buckley#evan buckley#trans evan buckley#chris diaz#christopher diaz
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several sentence sunday
so this is another fic I started on my vacation (I started three, and had one idea I haven't started yet lol - and one is already posted) - also, the two weeks here might change bc I'm struggling with the timeline (which doesn't matter but also it does lol) but I'll figure it out haha
(I'm still writing all my other wips btw, and gonna get to all the asks, but the writing beans have been gone lately, and I've been too exhausted lol - and my brain is so all over the place with my wips, idk what I wanna get to more)
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Evan knows he’s in love with Tommy about two weeks into their relationship.
(...)
They still barely know each other, but Evan knows. He can’t explain why, can’t explain how, he just knows. Tommy Kinard is it for him.
The moment he realizes it with utmost clarity is nothing special, really. He just spent the night at Tommy’s – not the first one, but it’s still new enough to fill him with nervous, giddy excitement, butterflies swirling in his stomach, which he hasn’t felt in years before Tommy. Everything about Tommy makes him feel like this. Tommy’s eye-crinkling, nose-scrunching adorable smile; Tommy’s eyes, always so fond when he looks at him; Tommy’s lips that taste so amazing Buck never wants to stop kissing him; Tommy’s big, big hands that feels so good in Buck’s, those strong arms and broad shoulders… – just everything about Tommy. At first Buck thought it’s the newness of this, of Tommy, of knowing about his bisexuality. But he’s also gotten so comfortable with Tommy in such a short time, and it doesn't even really feel new anymore, he knows it must be just him, must be Tommy making him feel like a giddy teen with a crush. Except the way this feels… Buck’s a grown man with tons of experience, and he knows how infatuation feels, how a simple crush and attraction feels, how real love feels. And he knows, deep down in his core, in his soul, in his heart, that this is real, that this is definitely more than a crush. This is what love feels like.
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no pressure tags (lmk if you wanna be added or removed):
@dr-shortsighted-owl @eddiebabygirldiaz @watchyourbuck @ladydorian05 @diazpatcher @monsterrae1 @rainbow-nerdss @pirrusstuff @bucks-daddy-issues @rogerzsteven @honestlydarkprincess @jesuisici33 @steadfastsaturnsrings @diazheartsbuckley @giddyupbuck @thewolvesof1998 @underwaterninja13 @your-catfish-friend @kinard-buckley @evansboyfriend @beyourownanchor6 @weewootruck @kirkaut @jewishbuckley @loveyouanyway @daffi-990 @lonelychicago @reformedplayerbibuck @spotsandsocks @bucked-it-up @theotherbuckley @drcloyd @bidisasterevankinard @tizniz @hippolotamus @diazsdimples @girlwonder-writes @perfectlysunny02 @dadbodbuck
#bucktommy wip#several sentence sunday#seven sentence sunday#wikiangela writes#this fic doesn't have a tag yet bc I have no idea what it is lol#I also started a different version of this that talks about different times buck's been truly in love and i still wanna write that#might connect that with this one or make it separate idk (it has like three sentences for now tho)#there's quite a few paragraphs in place of (...) but I wanted to share the very first sentence too idk#I also started a tommy&eddie friendship fic that I kinda wanna share... maybe for tuesday haha#911 fic#my writing#fic snippet#my wips#bucktommy#buck x tommy#kinley#tevan#911 abc#tommy kinard#evan buckley#idk the two weeks is just for now but i want it to be *early* bc iykyk 💁♀️
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back on my leo brainrot can yall imagine a rottmnt episode where the boys are traveled into leo’s mind for whatever reason
like that one episode in the 2012 series (journey into mikey’s mind i think ??)
oh the fluff & angst potential of that is killing me
#like they all see memories and dreams that leo had#while also seeing the pain and suffering he faced by krang#while also ALSO seeing how much he truly cares for his brothers#and how much he truly hides behind a smile#fuck i might have to write this now#like i had a thought where maybe the bros meet a younger mindscape leo?? kinda like baby mikey in that tmnt2012 episode#rottmnt#tmnt#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#rise leo#rottmnt leo#leonardo hamato#fics i wanna write
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