#now hiring boulder

[dragons-and-yellow-roses]

I had an interview on Monday and it went really well, the hiring manager said she really wanted me on the team and I should hear back by Tuesday. Didn't hear back by Tuesday, so on Wednesday I called them. They said the hiring manager was off for the next two days, call back on Friday after 1pm. I call at 2:15pm, the hiring manager has gone to the bank, call back in 10-15 minutes. If she's gone when I call back in about 30 minutes I'm just going to think she's avoiding me. Why is getting a job literal torture? This is a job at McDonald's btw.

Update: I have orientation on Monday!!

[puppetdeath]

applied to two new jobs pls pray for me 🙏

[sunderwight]

SV AU where Shen Yuan transmigrates into a dragon.

It's not so bad, at first. He's an extremely magical sort of dragon so he can easily take on a humanoid shape, and he has dominion over an entire mountain, with a magical gate that leads to his palace. Said palace has a fully stocked treasury, a library, garden, etc, with the only real downsides being that the place is kind of huge and very difficult for a neet with limited housekeeping or landscaping skills to keep up with. The original dragon had enslaved a bunch of fairy spirits to do it for him, but since Shen Yuan has moral objections to that, he'd let them all go and they'd run off before he could even think to offer to hire any of them as paid employees instead. Not that he can blame them for being in a hurry to get gone.

He does his best, and generally enjoys being a dragon lazing on his mountain, or wandering the beauty of his palace and investigating the books and scrolls kept there. He doesn't actually seem to need to eat or drink, so that's not really an issue, and nobody looks keen to bother him. But after a few months the dust starts to really pile up, and trying to figure out how to do his own laundry without modern equipment leads to several disasters, and even though he doesn't need to eat he's starting to think it would be quite nice to have a fancy sit-down dinner and enjoy it for its own sake anyway. He has an enchanted larder but his food prep skills aren't up to much.

So, Shen Yuan ventures away from his mountain. He keeps to his human disguise when he's not traveling, and at first tries to hire on some help from a nearby city. But when he explains that he lives on the mountain, he realizes the difficulty, because everyone in the area knows that only the dragon lives there. So they all think he's either a liar or a fraud, or some servant of a nefarious supernatural creature angling to trick and possibly devour them.

Shen Yuan tries approaching another town in his dragon form, to see if anyone will actually deal with him if he's being upfront and honest about the situation, but the townspeople just panic. He returns to his mountain to rethink his strategies, and in the meanwhile the alarmed locals hire a swordsman to go after him. The guy gives him a few very painful cuts before Shen Yuan mostly-accidentally sends him careening into a boulder. One broken arm later the swordsman is gently persuaded that the pay he was offered isn't worth the effort on this job, and leaves.

Discouraged, Shen Yuan decides he's gonna give this one last try. He picks the second closest city, flies up, and is like yes hello, yes I am indeed a dragon, no I'm not trying to burn down your walls, yes it would be excellent if you stopped shooting arrows at me, look they don't even get past the scales? It's kind of silly? Okay, yes, thank you very much. Good. Now, the thing is, I'm looking for some people. I want to take them back to my mountain with me, to my incredibly nice palace, and -- what was that? A princess? No no I don't want a princess, what would I even do with one? If anything I'm looking for the complete opposite of a princess!

Anyway, the locals take this to mean that the dragon is demanding a sacrifice in the form of a pretty boy of no particular pedigree, and Shen Yuan takes this to mean that he's finally made his case clear and they're going to dig up someone who is willing to overlook his being a dragon in exchange for free room and board and fair wages out of his massive treasury.

SY's a bit disheartened when the entire city could only apparently turn up one such person -- an underfed teenage boy who looks at Shen Yuan like, despite the situation, he is still expecting to be eaten at any moment. Poor thing! But at least having one servant means he can potentially get more, especially if it all goes well. The lad can tell others that working for a dragon isn't so bad! Well, provided that he doesn't give up in alarm at the state of the mountain palace.

For his part, Luo Binghe at first thinks he's definitely going to get eaten, and then that this dragon is weirdly nice about planning to eat him, and then that maybe the dragon has other (even less savory!) plans for him, until finally he sees the state of the dragon's laundry and the foot-thick layer of dust in the corners, and gets completely distracted. Mortal terror forgotten, those floors should not be that filthy, Lord Dragon respectfully that isn't how anyone should prepare rice either, but oh Binghe has never seen a kitchen so nice before in his life...!

Anyway, needless to say, it works out just fine.

[skyguys-princess]

𝐖𝐚𝐫 𝐨𝐟 𝐇𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐬

❛ ʀᴇᴄᴏɴ ❜

PAIRINGS: Vader x Rebel reader

SYNOPSIS: After a successful mission, things take an... interesting turn.

WARNINGS: Explosions, rebel activity, the Empire...

NOTES: In this AU the Mustafar duel happened but his legs weren't cut off. He still has burns around his legs and further down, not as intensively.

TIMELINE: next

「 Force 」

You stood upon the boulder, detonator in hand. Staring at the weapons manufactory, the stormtroopers filtering in and out. You felt yourself suffering from a crisis of conscience, and couldn’t for the life of you figure out why. These were people responsible for slaughtering innocent civilians, even the ones that followed the regime. They didn’t show mercy, not a sliver of it. So why were you here second guessing yourself about blowing this abomination to the ground? The mission report didn’t require you to evacuate the people inside. But you felt something tugging at your heart. Have they ever hesitated when it came to collateral damage? No…

But you weren’t them, and you didn’t want to be. You held your head up high, grabbing your datapad from your utility belt. Hacking into the Empire’s systems which was surprisingly not as difficult as you thought. ‘That’s what happens when you hire boneheads for IT.’ Shaking your head amused, despite seriousness of the current situation. You set off the evacuation, the alarms started blaring. Flashing red as the factory workers and stormtroopers alike started filling out of the building systematically. Sharing confused looks amongst each other as they made their way to the designated evacuation point. Grabbing your binoculars from your backpack you scanned the building in infrared. After making sure there were no heat signatures left inside. You pressed on the detonator, hearing the click before the building shook. Collapsing in on itself, catching light. Startling the Imperials as they took cover, shouting amongst themselves. Feeling the heat from the explosion reaching you even from your distance. You looked down at them, giving a salute. “For the rebellion,” you whispered. The words being carried in the wind, before turning on your heels. Heading back for your concealed ship. Allowing your footprints to be distorted by the wind, no trace of you left behind. At least you thought.

[ Meanwhile ]

Darth Vader is pulled from his meditation by a tug from the force. His piercing eyes snapping open, a gnawing feeling tearing through his gut. He stood up, his cape following suit. He stepped off the platform in his meditation chamber. Smoothing his hair back out of his face before grabbing his helmet that rested on its designated stand. The cold lenses staring back at him, a constant reminder of who he is now and the responsibilities that came with that. Sliding it over his head once more, hearing it click. Securing its place as the respirator flooded the inside with oxygen, he took a deep breath. Before exhaling, the sound resonating around the room. Giving an even more dramatic tone to his mere presence. He let his heavy arms fall back to his sides. The weight of his worries weighing down his toned shoulders. He took one last deep breath to centre himself, before exiting his mediation chamber. Heading for the war room, as soon as the door of his private chamber slid open. Vader was met face to face, well face to chest. With a lower level officer, sent to fetch him no doubt. To be notified about whatever had happened to cause such a disturbance in the force. The officer spoke up hesitantly, his voice trembling. “I- I’ve been sent to retrieve you, Ad- Admiral Tarkin wishes to see you in the war room.” Vader look down at the man, no older than his early twenties he estimated.

Not much younger than himself, not that he would know that. His mask was worn at all times in public, both the physical and the metaphoric one. So much so that who he was before he’d adorned it was a distant memory now, essentially another life. Without a word, Vader heads to the war room. Leaving the officer frozen in fear in his wake. The soft stomping resounded through the hallways, alerting everyone in earshot of his encroaching presence.

While Vader stalked down the halls of The Executor, his cape the colour of night. Billowing in his wake, the stormtroopers that were making their rounds quickly darted out of his way. The sounds of his respirator echoing through the halls, and ringing in his head. A ringing he’d grown used to, it’d become background noise. While there were many things he hated about the suit. In moments like this, he appreciated the anonymity. Though deep down, in a corner tucked in his mind. He knew that was only part of its purpose. The costraphobic layers, served as a reminded. A reminder of his duty to the Empire, to Sidious. And of the betrayal that led him here, the scars he’d gained in consequence had faded. But still clung to his skin, digging their way into his very soul. What was left of it at least, taunting him. Of what he’d done, who he’d hurt. Betrayed, the lives he’d taken, and those that followed-

“Lord Vader,” the voice of Admiral Tarkin greeted him. His gaze shifted, looking up from his position in the doorway. To the Admiral, his gaze flitting to the projection lit. Exposing the damage to the manufaction plant, the hologram rotating slowly. His body was on autopilot as he stepped closer, analysing the image in front of him. “As you can see, the weapons manufactory plant has been completely levelled. No personnel were lost, an evacuation alert went off prior to the explosion.”

“Who set off the evacuation?” He questioned shortly, his words eerily even.

“Unknown. The perpretrator was able to compromise our systems, initiating the evacuation before the building was destroyed.” Tarkin’s words became a blur to Vader, his mind racing. As he felt that feeling from before tugging at his gut. He continued to stare at the projection, ‘this was a suspected rebel attack. But the MO is different, why evacuate the building if it’s supposed to be a message against the Empire? Why go through the effort of evacuation?’ He thought, crossing his thick arms over his chest.

「 You 」

I watch the ramp to my ship lower, and I took a deep breath. Steadying myself as I walked up the ramp, heading for the control panel so I could get out of this shit show as soon as possible. Something was… different. I couldn’t quite put my finger on it, and that’s what’s worrying me.

I heard the whoosh as the ramp door closed. I start the engine, taking off slowly and steady. Keeping the noise down to a minimum, even though the factory was destroy I didn’t want to push it. After exiting the atmosphere I prepare to jump into hyperspace. I wrap my fingers around the lever, gripping it tightly-

I can’t see anything, blinking rapidly. Suddenly blinded by fluorescent lights, slowly the room comes into focus. Something rotating in front of me, when my eyes focused. It was a blueprint… to the manufacture plant I just blew up. Shivers climb up my spine as I hear a deep inhale, that sounded like a machine… or a man? “Hello little minx,” I jolt in surprise. The voice lingering in my mind.

“What the fuck…” I whisper. My eyes darting around, I’m back in my ship.

dividers: @vibeswithrenai + @chilumitos

taglist 🏷: @rabbitrabbit12321

(lmk if you want to be added or removed)

[hopefulromances]

Long Time Coming I Chapter Ten I Here We Go Again

Summary: Being hired as the first female assistant coach in the league was a challenge of it itself. Being a football protigy and University Football Legend was easy enough. Coaching Jamie Tartt was a challenge all on its own.

Word Count: 2.9k

Warning: None?? That I can think of?

A/N: Enjoy

Prologue One Two Three Four Five Six Seven Eight Nine

Have you ever smelt miles and miles of poop surrounding you? I hadn’t either until Ted’s big plan to get the guys spirits up. But now that smell was stuck in my nose. Even if it was just poopeh.

I stood on the pitch, one foot on the ball. It was the beginning of a new season. A new start. Which I was thankful for. The past few months since the end of the last season, and the excitement of the promotion, had been an emotional whirlwind and I was excited to finally have something to focus on. AFC Richmond had a chip on its shoulder the size of a boulder going into the season and all eyes were on us. Unfortunately, most of the odds were stacked against you even Paddington Bear had the odds against you.

But things were different this time around. Richmond was stronger, more put together than ever. This team was on the brink of being the greatest, all they needed was the right push. What that push was going to be, I couldn’t say.

I took a step back and punted the ball down the field watching it as it fell, down, down before bouncing once then into the goal.

By the time I made it back into the building, the halls were bustling with life. Various greyhounds coming into the locker room, various staff walking in and out of rooms, all the signs of an active football club. I made my way up to Rebecca’s office to meet Keely. Since she was becoming a big CEO and all, she wouldn’t be at the club as much.

She left Rebecca’s office with Ted and Higgins following closely behind.

            “(Y/N) (L/N)!” Ted greeted. “What are you doing here?”

            “She’s here to see me, of course!” Keely told him, coming over to loop her arm with mine.

Ted put his hand over his heart in feigned offense. “And here I was thinking she was here for me.”

            “Sorry, Ted,” I said, leaning against Keely. “I’ll be sure to set up our morning chat later.”

As Keely and I headed down the stairs, we chatted about the off season and Keely’s exciting new job. We reached the bottom of the stairs where we were met by Isaac leaving the locker room. He asked her for a shoe deal. Not a brand deal. Just shoes. I glanced over and saw Jamie walking down the hallway with Bumbercatch and Colin. We made eye contact for a moment before I tore my eyes away from him to look over at Colin.

            “Hey, Colin.” I approached him instead. “How’s it going?”

            “Hey, (Y/N).” He smiled at me. “Bumber and me were just talking about going to see some music this weekend, do you want to come?”

I glanced over at Jamie again who was now talking to Keely. “Oh, I wish. I actually have plans.”

            “Oh, too bad. But next time year?”

            “Definitely!”

Finally, Keely and I were done dealing with the hordes of footballers and we could finally chat. That was until Roy approached us. I knew enough about their situation to back off for a moment, give them a second to chat. I felt Jamie’s eyes burning a hole in the back of my head, but I refused to look. I couldn’t look. I didn’t trust myself to look. So, I just waited, staring at literally nothing.

Finally, Keely was done and walking down the hallway. I rushed after her, not acknowledging the boys behind me.

            “Keely! Wait!” I called rushing after her. “What was that? With Roy?”

            “Oh, that? We… we uh… broke up!” She said it like it was nothing. Like she hadn’t just dropped the biggest bombshell of my life.

I grabbed her arm and pulled her towards me. “What?”

            “We haven’t really told people, but yeah…” She shrugged then looked at her watch. “Look at that! I have to go.”

            “Keely! You can’t just-“

            “Gotta go, Barb’s waiting for me.”

            “Keely we’re gonna talk about this!”

            “Later!”

And she was off, leaving the club. I shook my head in disbelief. I turned around just intime to see Jamie leaving the boot room with Roy. We made eye contact. I started backing away slowly, and Jamie started walking towards me. Step by step I backed up until I hit a wall and Jamie was standing right in front of me.

            “(Y/N).”

            “Jamie.”

Then he was kissing me. I gasped in surprise but kissed him back for a moment before pushing him off of me.

            “Jamie, not here.”

He pouted at me as I pushed past him. “No one’s around, I checked.”

            “You did not check, you said my name then you were kissing me,” I pointed out peaking around the corner before turning back to face him.

            “I know, I know, just…” He leaned against the wall next to me. “How long do we have to keep it a secret?”

Deciding to stay private for a while was my idea. If it were up to him, he’d be on me all hours of the day and while that idea sounded really nice, I needed time to have him to myself. Just us.

            “Just until… the season gets started,” I decided on saying. “People aren’t nice to me in the press and I don’t want to give them another reason to hate me.” Jamie pouted, grumbling something about not caring what people say. I turned to face him, bringing my hands up to rub up over his shoulders. “Look, for now we’re theirs but when we get home, we’re ours. It’s better this way.”

Though I didn’t sound too convinced myself. It broke my heart to keep Jamie a secret, and I know it was hurting him as well. But my worst fear was going public and hearing all the reasons we shouldn’t be together. He deserved better than me, or I was the reasons we weren’t playing well. Whatever they could find to tear us apart.

            “Ours, I like the sound of that, love,” He crooned, smirking at me.

            “Yeah… ours,” I echoed him, matching his smile. I saw him start to lean down to kiss me but panic shot through me so instead, I stepped back and started down the hallway to the locker room. I heard him stumble behind me and let out a curse, but I continued forward.

The locker room was a mess. The boys were up in arms about the Roy and Keely break up, something to do with signing Zava, and Trent Crimm for some reason? Jamie wasn’t far behind me but I tried not to notice him as he came in and stood to the side.

            “Why would Zava write a book about Trent Crimm?” Zoreaux shouted in confusion. I walked into the room looking around at the chaos.

            “Hold on a second!” Ted silenced the room. “If y’all didn’t know about Zava, which may or may not happen…”

            “We’re getting Zava?” I muttered to Beard.

            “Possibly,” He replied.

            “And y’all didn’t know about Trent Crimm, which is happening…” Ted continued.

            “Trent Crimm is writing a book about us?” I asked again.

            “Definitely,” Beard confirmed.

            “Then what were you so worked up about?” Ted finally finished.

The boys looked at each other, none of them wanting to admit what the issue was. Finally, Sam stepped up.

            “Roy and Keely broke up.”

Beard yelped, making me jump. Then Ted fainted.

It seemed the whole league was up in arms trying to get Zava to join them. It was all the boys could talk about as well. Especially Dani. Dani had a weird thing going to be honest. Zava certainly was an amazing player. I’d seen him on the field. He reminded me of Jamie a few years ago. Except he was about 10 years older with a wife and children.

The other weird thing was Roy’s vendetta against Trent Crimm. He’d outright banned all the lads from talking to him about anything. It was weird and personal in a way I’d never seen Roy act before.

            “(Y/N) (L/N), first female coach in the league…” Trent started, coming up to me.

            “Nope.” I shut him down. Even if I wanted to talk to him, starting the conversation about my place as a woman in a male dominated field was not going to be the way to do it. I walked straight past him into the coaches office.

Roy was smiling at me as I did. “Nicely done, (L/N).”

            “I didn’t do it for you, dickhead,” I grumbled, though I was smiling while I said it. I was smiling more than I used to now. Things were going well! The club was promoted, I was with Jamie, and things were finally looking up. So, why on earth did I feel off.

            “Jamie! I’m home!” I called into the house as I walked in, juggling a bag of groceries on my hip.  There was silence in the house, though. Maybe, he wasn’t here. We hadn’t officially moved in yet, so it wasn’t like we were always together. But usually, after a long day of pretending we weren’t together, he liked to be with me. Then I heard the sound of the TV on. “Jamie?”

I walked into the house and placed my bag of groceries down on the counter. From the kitchen I could see into the living room where Jamie was watching a football game. He was leaning forward, completely engrossed in the events of the game. It was cute to watch him to enamored with the game he loved so much. I came around the back of the couch and placed my hands on Jamie’s shoulders, prompting him to lean back.

            “Hey, babe,” I greeted, kissing the top of his head. He hummed in response, his eyes still not leaving the screen.  “What game are you watching?” It took me a second to realize he was watching me. That it was my kit on the screen. An old imperial game where I was commanding the field. I stood back, letting my hands fall to my sides. “Jamie… what is this?’”

            “It’s you, ain’t it?” He pointed at the screen. “I love this part, watch” I watched as I did a backwards kick to a teammate, sending the ball back to the middle of the field before it was sent back to me on the outside. From there I sent the back flying in a beautiful arch into the goal. “Fuckin’ brilliant it is.”

I watched myself celebrate on the screen, my teammates swarming me and cheering my name. It made my smile remembering those times. But I tore myself away from it before I could get too sucked into the nostalgia of actually playing football.

            “I’m gonna make dinner,” I said, turning back into the kitchen.

Jamie hopped up off the couch and followed me. “Why’d you stop?”

            “Hm?”

            “Why’d you stop playing football?”

I started to unpack the groceries I got thinking on the question. Why had I stopped? I stopped because the second I was out of uni, no one cared about me anymore. I stopped because my mum told me that it was time to get serious, that football wasn’t a career for women. I stopped because everything in the world was against me when I graduated.

            “Uh, it just didn’t work out for me, I guess,” I replied, absentmindedly.

            “I find that hard to believe,” Jamie returned, coming over to help me put stuff into the refrigerator. “You were top of the league when you graduated. Surely you had offers.”

            “It just didn’t work out, alright, Jamie?” I said, shortly, ending the conversation. “Now can you grab me the butter out of the fridge.” Jamie pursed his lips at me, clearly knowing there was more to the story than what I was letting on. But he grabbed a stick of butter and tossed it over to me. “Besides, I like coaching now. I’m good at it.”

That made Jamie smile. “Right on that one, babe.”

I sighed, happy that I was able to get Jamie off the subject of my departure from the game. Of course, I wanted to play football when I got out of college. But there were some words that cut too deep to ignore.

Luckily, we had the upcoming Chelsea game to discuss. Richmond was the talk of the town. Well, right next to Zava, we were. Everyone was watching as we either sunk or swam in the Premiere league on our first attempt back.

The stadium was buzzing as Roy, and I entered the field. At first, the buzzing was geared towards Roy. The chant of ‘he’s here, he’s there, he’s every-fucking-where, Roy Kent” filled the air. I could tell he was trying not to let it get to him, but he was touched for sure. But that chant was soon overtaken with cants of ‘Zava’! I turned and saw the prick in the stands. It made sense, Zava was all but signed to Chelsea according to Higgins’s various rumors.

But then the game was off. I watched as the boys tried to get something going but after several failed attempts, including one off Dani’s face, we ended the first half 1-nil with Chelsea on the board. Chelsea was playing offensively. Waiting for our guys to pass so they could intercept and take back possession. All they needed to do was hold onto the ball as long as possible.

            “Hey, fellas. Listen up,” Ted began, starting our half time meeting. “We get one goal we’re right back in this thing, yeah? But right now, we are being so unoffensive, we might as well be a Hallmark Christmas movie, you know what I’m saying.”

No, no we did not. But he continued nonetheless.

            “I mean, Coach, how many shots on goal we have that half?”

            “Just one,” I answered.

            “And that one was pretty much a mistake. Am I correct, Dani?”

            “Yes, it bounced off my face. But my face almost scored!” He returned enthusiastically.

The boys chattered amongst themselves, trying to figure out exactly what they were doing wrong. I dared a glance over at Jamie. We’d mastered the art of eye conversations. We usually were able to communicate our thoughts without saying anything. Sneaking around will do that for you. He had a thought, I could tell. If he was on the same page as me, I wanted him to share. He nodded at me.

            “Just an idea,” Jamie offered starting to stand.

            “What you got?” Ted called on him.

            “Right, so every time they’re going past the halfway line, they’re just...”

Then Trent entered the room, and everyone fell silent. I wanted to rip my hair out of my skull. They were giving up valuable strategy time all because of some stupid grudge Roy had on Trent. I looked at Ted, begging him to do something. Luckily, he seemed to understand my plea.

First Ted went with Roy just a few feet away into the showers. Then Ted emerged and Roy barked for Trent. Whatever happened in that room I don’t want to know but when they came out again, Roy allowed us to discuss around Trent. Unfortunately, we didn’t have much time, so I urged Jamie to finish his thought.

            “Listen!” Jamie shouted out over the noise. “What I’m saying is, every time we go past halfway, they’re just blocking up the passing lanes, you get that? So just kept dribbling until they stop you.”

That’s my boy. He saw exactly what I had seen. The boys seemed to have more energy going into the second half and it showed when Sam scored a goal off Dani’s face. And that was it, we finished the game in a tie against Chelsea.

As unorthodox as it was, I was excited. Excited because I could feel the electricity of things working on the field. Of the boys understanding each other and communicating. This was the game I loved. For a moment, just a single moment, I wished it was me on the field.

As we exited the field, I caught Trent standing to the side as we filed into the locker room.

            “Trent,” I called over, to him.

            “Coach (L/N),” He noted, standing up straight as I walked over to him. “To what do I owe the honor.”

I snorted, shaking my head. “Look, if there’s one thing, I want you to understand about me is that I am not some female superstar here to save my gender in the league.” He cocked his head at me, removing his glasses to better look at me. “I’m here because I love football. Just like everyone else on this team.”

He nodded at me, understanding. “I hear you. I understand you were quite the player in university. What made you stop playing.”

Oh, so now everyone was wondering about my past huh. Well, this wasn’t about to become some melodrama about why I didn’t play football anymore. I was here to do one thing and one thing only, coach football.

            “Nope!” I popped the ‘p’ at the end and sent him a wink. And with that I turned around and headed back into the locker room.

            “Goodnight, Coach (L/N)!” I heard Trent countered as I walked away. This season was certainly turning out to be an interesting one. But then again, when wasn’t it always.

I was looking forward to the celebration that was in store in the locker room but what I was met with was the awe shocked group watching a video on their phones. A video of Zava deciding to come to Richmond.

Tag List: @heletsmelovehim @higherthanheroes @ajax-petropolus-wife @oxxolovemelikeyoudooxxo @optimisticsandwichgladiator @kno-way-home @sleepy-time @wigglegiggle @skewedcherries @respondingtoshowerthoughts-blog @snubug @rana030

[itsmarsss]

Oddly Exicited for your M&M x Reader thing for some time lol Have you posted it yet, if so where? Seems like a fun read from what you've said on your blog (Snippet maybe? Please?)

~🌸🧡

I haven’t finished it yet!! But I’m excited to have it out too!!

And yeahhh sure babes!! Here’s a lil snippet

You clear your throat. “Okay. So if you followed the schedule for today you…” you check the notes. “You took down an entire football team?”

“Yeah.”

“Collaterals?”

“Two cheerleaders. They pissed Millie off.” You take note of it.

“‘Kay. We got an urgent hire today while you guys were out, offered double our price and upfront, so we gotta squeeze her in for tomorrow.”

“We got a lot going on tomorrow?”

“Kinda. But I’ll go with you to help out.”

“That sounds good. We love it when you come with us!” He tells you, a distracting hand moving to your knee.

“Um. Yeah. So uh. I- fuck. I forgot what I was gonna say.”

“Oh? Are you okay?”

“Yeah I’m great. I just-“ you close your eyes, trying to focus. Now Moxxie’s mere presence around you seems enough to mess with you and, well, that simply sucks major ass.

“Are you alright?”

“Can you stop?”

“What?”

“Just… stop. I don’t know why you’re doing this but you’re married and you need to cut it out.”

“Oh. Am I making you uncomfortable? I’m really so sorry, y/n.” He immediately retracts his hand, eyeing you carefully.

“So you are doing something?”

“I-“

“I knew I wasn’t fucking crazy. But you- you’re fucking crazy. You know, I really thought you might be the only loyal guy in all fucking hell.”

“What are you- oh. Oh. You think I’m trying to cheat on Millie.”

“Sure seems like it.”

He laughs. “No. Satan, no. I would never!”

“Really?” You raise an eyebrow in distrust. Does he think you’re stupid? “What’s going on then?”

“You see, Millie and I, we… both of us… we took a… liking to you. And I mean, you noticed, didn’t you?”

“I- I-“

“You know, I told Millie I didn’t think you’d be into it at first. I was really worried we were gonna scare you off. ‘Cause you’re such a good friend, we’d hate to push you away over this. But then your reactions! We just couldn’t get enough of making you all flustered. It’s really cute, you know?”

You keep your stare trained on the pile of files in front of you, trying to process the whole situation. “I don’t think I understand.”

Moxxie smiles and places his hand on your shoulder before turning to the door. “Honey could you come in here?” He yells out to Millie, and your eyes shoot at the door, wide, as she walks into the room.

“Yes, baby? Everything okay?”

“Yeah, we’re okay. We’re just… talking.” You don’t miss the look he shoots her, somehow communicating the nature of your ‘talking’. “I thought you’d explain things better than me.”

Millie walks up to where Moxxie sits, placing her hands on his boulders from behind him. “Oh! How far are we on ‘things’?”

“She’s a little confused about what we’ve been doing.”

“Oh! Not far at all! There’s so many things we’d like to do you, hun.”

This is where it starts to get fun !! lol

[bestfictionaldinosaur]

Brackets Are Here! (Repost)

I made a pretty significant oversight in my last version of this post; I had to make a few more cuts to the lineup, but it should be good to go now! The final (hopefully for real this time) list can be found here!

If you submitted a candidate please verify that the image and name that I used are correct and suitable!!!! (Ctrl+F is your friend!)

If you find a mistake please let me know, and I will either explain or correct it. Additionally, you are welcome to suggest a replacement image of OFFICIAL art!

I will leave it open for a week or so for everyone to review, after which voting will begin and everything will be locked in! So verify that everything looks good with your candidates, reblog if you haven't yet, and get ready to vote!

Oh, and blacklist "saurnament promotion" if you don't want to see repeated reblogs from me!

Text version of bracket lineup under the cut (it's a lot!):

----------------

Ornithischian Bracket (Round 1)

Ulti [One Piece] Styraco [Dinosaucers]

Pepperoni [Teenage Mutant NInja Turtles] Tri-Tip [Skylanders]

Horrorsteed Iguanadon [Dinosaur Arcade] Sabersaurus [Yu-Gi-Oh!]

Bix [Dinotopia] Bastiodon [Pokemon]

Spike [Extreme Dinosaurs] Parry [Parry and Carney]

Heavy Tank [Final Fantasy] Territorial Hammerskull [Magic the Gathering]

Rampardos [Pokemon] Gwangi [Valley of Gwangi]

Corythosaurus [Paleo Pines] Iguanador [Flight Rising]

Parasaurmon [Digimon] Tricky the Triceratops [Donkey Kong]

Pachy Zord [Power Rangers] Gulp [Spyro the Dragon]

Zog [Teenage Mutant NInja Turtles] Scrut [Banjo-Kazooie]

Tricky [Star Fox] Slug [Transformers]

Scrit [Banjo-Kazooie] Tootsie the Triceratops [Duck Tales]

Boulder [Transformers] Hypsilophodon [The Dinosaur's Diary]

Tricero [Dinosaucers] Dimitri [The Legend of Zelda]

Aladar [Dinosaur (2000)] Parasaurzord [Power Rangers]

Green Torch [DC] Reese [Dinosaurs for Hire]

Craig [Dinosaur Office] Tortoceratops [Dragon Quest]

Trixie [Toy Story] Monochromon [Digimon]

Ducky [Land Before Time] Lambeo [Fossil Fighters]

Lady Margaret [Jurassic Park] Paris [Dinosaur King]

Woog [We're Back: A Dinosaur's Story] Aggron [Pokemon]

Nizbel [Chrono Trigger] Reptil [Marvel]

Armadon [Primal Rage] Chomp [Dinosaur King]

Styracavus [Flight Rising] Riff [Barney]

Triceratops [Dinotopia] Renzor [Super Mario]

Lucky [Paleo Pines] Guiledart [Transformers]

Bakhita [Jurassic Park] Ouranosaurus [Paleo Pines]

Gatling Gun Dino [Spyro the Dragon] BJ [Barney]

Old Buck [Deadsound's Dinosauria/Sauria] Trizaur [Bakugan]

Drip [Tyrannosaurus Drip] Eema [Dinosaur (2000)]

Patchi [Walking With Dinosaurs] Zalmoxes [Prehistoric Planet]

Trixie [Night at the Museum] Scrat [Banjo-Kazooie]

Theo the Triceratops [Prehistoric Park] Psittacosaurus [Paleo Pines]

Babycerasaurus [Yu-Gi-Oh!] Quackpot [Dinosaucers]

Armored Kincaller [Magic the Gathering] Ardun [Xenoblade]

King Dodongo [The Legend of Zelda] Scrotty [Banjo-Kazooie]

Maisuke [Doraemon] Jurrac Iguanon [Yu-Gi-Oh!]

Nasaur [Fossil Fighters] Triceratops Dinozord [Power Rangers]

Rodger Blair [Dino Squad] Dweeb [We're Back: A Dinosaur's Story]

Triceratops [Dinosaur Arcade] Rhenoplos [Monster Hunter]

Salada [Fossil Fighters] Kestodon [Monster Hunter]

"Triceratops" [Simba the King Lion] Baby Bop [Barney]

Wonderdon [DC] Cera [Land Before Time]

Pervatasaurus Leeri [The Onion] Treyzer [Bakugan]

Professor Steg [Fortunately, the Milk] Aptonoth [Monster Hunter]

Wuerhosaurus [Paleo Pines] Stego Cyber [Yu-Gi-Oh!]

Url [Dinosaur (2000)] Darkyloseid [DC]

Ankylo Hammer Zord [Power Rangers] Snowflake Stegosaurus [Dinosaur Arcade]

Umasou [You Are Umasou] Bellowing Aegisaur [Magic the Gathering]

Scelidosaurus [Paleo Pines] Ankylomon [Digimon]

Stegmutt [Darkwing Duck] Stego [Dinosaucers]

Dromosaur [Magic the Gathering] Stegosaurus [Fantasia]

Stego Spike Zord [Power Rangers] Hard Rock [Extreme Dinosaurs]

Anguirus [Toho/Monsterverse] Bargasaurus [Banjo-Kazooie]

Lowjaw Minmi [Flight Rising] Ankylo [Dinosaucers]

Chase [Transformers] Bumpy [Jurassic Park]

Saberback [Transformers] Tank [Dinosaur King]

Stegz [Extreme Dinosaurs] Spike [Land Before Time]

Lorenzo [Dinosaurs for Hire] Dorothy the Dinosaur [The Wiggles]

Apceros [Monster Hunter] Slobber Tooth [Skylanders]

Stogg [My Singing Monster] Stegomon [Digimon]

Snarl [Transformers] Dazzle [Dazzle the Dinosaur]

Erwin Caruso [Dino Squad] Black Stego [Yu-Gi-Oh!]

----------------

Saurischian Bracket (Round 1)

Jurrac Guiaba [Yu-Gi-Oh!] Stegosaurus [asdfmovie]

Jurrac Brachis [Yu-Gi-Oh!] Mechazaurus [Mega Man]

Borun-tosaurus [Kirby] Chomposaur [Earthbound]

Meganium [Pokemon] Denver [Denver, the Last Dinosaur]

Titanus [Power Rangers] Alpha [Dinosaur Planet]

Heatwave [Transformers] Molly [The Amazing World of Gumball]

Chomby [Neopets] Infected Argentinosaurus [Primal]

Kommo-o [Pokemon] Littlefoot [Land Before Time]

Magmasaur [Magic the Gathering] UltimateBrachiomon [Digimon]

Sauropod Brachion [Yu-Gi-Oh!] Diplodocus [Walking With Dinosaurs]

Larinoth [Monster Hunter] Beylene [Dinosaur (2000)]

Queen [One Piece] Todd [Dinosaur Office]

Bob [Dinosaur Bob] Arlo [The Good Dinosaur]

Dino [The Flintstones] Bronto Thunder [Dinosaucers]

Gertie the Dinosaur [Gertie the Dinosaur] Aurorus [Pokemon]

Dippy [Teenage Mutant NInja Turtles] Ultimate Humungousaur [Ben 10]

Yobby [Tumblr User @iguanamouth's Dream] Tropius [Pokemon]

Dippy [Banjo-Kazooie] Brachiosaur [Final Fantasy]

Humungousaur [Ben 10] Frigi [Fossil Fighters]

Supersaur [DC] The Dinosaur [Danny and the Dinosaur]

Millesaur [Xenoblade] Sludge [Transformers]

Firecracker [Jurassic Park] Slog [Transformers]

Dink [Dink the Little Dinosaur] Brachio [Dinosaucers]

Wetnosaur [Earthbound] Isisaurus [Prehistoric Planet]

Jurrac Gallim [Yu-Gi-Oh!] Scorn [Transformers]

Duna [Fossil Fighters] Jokerzard [DC]

Yoshi Kid [Super Mario] Zuum [Monster Rancher]

Jurrac Spinos [Yu-Gi-Oh!] Flashraptor [DC]

Fiona Flagstaff [Dino Squad] Etali, Primal Conqueror [Magic the Gathering]

Blue [Jurassic Park] Rudy [Ice Age]

Doug Jones [The Velocipastor] Avinychus [Dinosaur Simulator]

Souleating Oviraptor [Yu-Gi-Oh!] Anchovy [Teenage Mutant NInja Turtles]

Compsognathus [Paleo Pines] Mr. Conductor [Dinosaur Train]

Page One [One Piece] Cyber Gallimimus [Dinosaur Arcade]

Jurrac Stauriko [Yu-Gi-Oh!] Birdetta [Super Mario]

Indoraptor [Jurassic Park] Amped Raptor [Magic the Gathering]

Aquanyx [DC] Spino Zord [Power Rangers]

Yoshi [Super Mario] Ozzy and Strut [Land Before Time]

Voodoo Microraptor [Dinosaur Arcade] Raptor Red [Raptor Red]

Utahraptor [Quantz Comics] Spinosaurus [Jurassic Park]

Dr. Dinosaur [Atomic Robo] Gunfighter Dino [Spyro the Dragon]

Spinoraptor [Jurassic Park] Mutant Niptor [Neopets]

Dromiceiomimus [Quantz Comics] Tzitzi-Ya-Ku [Monster Hunter]

Chaos Therizinosaurus [Dinosaur Arcade] Diego Brando [JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure]

Sunrise Troodo [Flight Rising] Mononykus [Prehistoric Planet]

Old Lace [Marvel] Mr. Robustus [Reverse Jurassic Park]

Great Wroggi [Monster Hunter] Talon [Primal Rage]

Dinobot [Transformers] Smoking Utahraptor [Walking With Dinosaurs]

Spinomon [Digimon] White Tip [Dinosaur Planet]

The Raptor [Toronto Raptors] Kyraptor [Coromon]

Spino [Fossil Fighters] Jellysaur [Cookie Run]

The Big One / Clever Girl [Jurassic Park] Pantalaza [Magic the Gathering]

Skateboarding Coelophysis [Walking With Dinosaurs] Hook [Bakugan]

Helovolk [Nexomon] Riptor [Killer Instinct]

Tree Creeper [Primeval] Menou [Naruto]

Mr. Pilkington [The Critic] TNT Dino [Spyro the Dragon]

Great Izuchi [Monster Hunter] Night Feeder [Primal]

Jurrac Giganoto [Yu-Gi-Oh!] Alex [Tekken]

Chaos, Limbo, and Grim [Jurassic Park] Jurrac Herra [Yu-Gi-Oh!]

Emperor Hugo Khan [Dinotopia] Princess Dei [Dinosaucers]

Deinocheirus [Prehistoric Planet] Rhedosaurus [The Beast from 20,000 Fathoms]

Therizinosaurus [Paleo Pines] Burnsaurus [Princess Connect Re:Dive!]

Spiny [Dinosaur King] Seikret [Monster Hunter]

Pod [Dinosaur Planet] Black Veloci [Yu-Gi-Oh!]

----------------

T-Rex and Friends Bracket (Round 1)

Ultimate Tyranno [Yu-Gi-Oh!] Geno Breaker [Zoids]

Anjanath [Monster Hunter] Dino-Rang [Skylanders]

Ultimate Conductor Tyranno [Yu-Gi-Oh!] Lava Lizard [Spyro the Dragon]

Burn Dinorex [Mega Man] Giganta [DC]

Tyranno Infinity [Yu-Gi-Oh!] Toro [Jurassic Park]

Carney [Parry and Carney] SkullGreymon [Digimon]

Tyrannosaurus Dinozord [Power Rangers] Chote [Teenage Mutant NInja Turtles]

D-Rex [Kirby] Tyrantrum [Pokemon]

Dino [Monster Rancher] Devil Dinosaur [Marvel]

Traumador the Tyrannosaur [The Tyrannosaur Chronicles] Hank [Prehistoric Planet]

Indominus Rex [Jurassic Park] T-Rex [Google Dino Run]

Tyrannomon [Digimon] Rockstar [Inazuma Eleven]

Tyranniqueen [Persona] Heart [You Are Umasou]

T-Rox [My Singing Monster] Roberta/Rexy [Jurassic Park]

Buddy [Dinosaur Train] Doodle Beast Tyranno [Yu-Gi-Oh!]

Mechagodzilla [Toho/Monsterverse] Scorpius Rex [Jurassic Park]

Dino Agito [Beyblade] Atrocitaurus [DC]

Archie [Dinosaurs for Hire] T-Rex [Astrobot]

Bonehead [Dinosaucers] Fang [Primal]

Tyrano [Chrono Cross] Tyrranax [Magic the Gathering]

Greymon [Digimon] Jurrac Titano [Yu-Gi-Oh!]

Broken Jaw [Dinosaur Revolution] Matilda the T-Rex [Prehistoric Park]

Taurox [Deadsound's Dinosauria/Sauria] Chomper [Land Before Time]

Little Das [Dinosaur Planet] Afsan [The Quintaglio Ascension]

Ace [Dinosaur King] Reptar [Rugrats]

MetalGreymon (Virus) [Digimon] Rex [We're Back: A Dinosaur's Story]

Magnificent Digalus [Xenoblade] RustTyrannomon [Digimon]

Trypticon [Transformers] Megavore [Dinosaur Simulator]

T-Rex in F-14 [Calvin and Hobbes] Rex [Toy Story]

Rosie [Neopets] Colossal Dreadmaw [Magic the Gathering]

Igno [Fossil Fighters] Tyrannosaur [Final Fantasy]

Mr. Patch [Banjo-Kazooie] Freezy Rex [Kirby]

Chopper [Skylanders] T-Rex [Tomb Raider]

T-Rex [Doraemon] Carnozord [Power Rangers]

Grimlock [Transformers] Diablo [Primal Rage]

Tyregg [Nexomon] Vastatosaurus rex [King Kong]

Tina Rex [The Amazing World of Gumball] Black Tyrrano [Chrono Trigger]

Goodsie [Dinosaurchestra] Ferocisaurus [Dragonball]

Speckles [Speckles the Tarbosaurus] Rolf Maxwell [Dino Squad]

Allo [Dinosaucers] FrostBaron Tyrannosaurus [Dinosaur Arcade]

Gorosaurus [Toho/Monsterverse] Iris [Overlord]

Rankar Dragon [Xenogears] Agumon [Digimon]

El Dinosaurio Anacleto [31 Minutos] Godzilla [Toho/Monsterverse]

Skeleton Rex [Castlevania] T-Bone [Extreme Dinosaurs]

Cyclops [Dino Crisis] Deviljho [Monster Hunter]

Bat Walker [DC] Guilmon [Digimon]

Vampire T-Rex [With Animation You Can!] Speega [Teenage Mutant NInja Turtles]

T-Rex [Super Mario] Barney [Barney]

Rexy [Night at the Museum] General Scales [Star Fox]

X Drake [One Piece] Sharptooth [Land Before Time]

Torakor [Neopets] Baby [Dinosaurs]

Carnotaurs [Dinosaur (2000)] Momma Dino [Ice Age]

T-Rex [Quantz Comics] Trox [Bakugan]

Albino Terror [Dinosaur Simulator] Gergoth [Castlevania]

Galem Darkhand [Neopets] Odo [Live A Live]

Tyrannomon X [Digimon] T-Rex [Fantasia]

Bio Rex [F-Zero] Gon [Gon]

Tiny [Meet the Robinsons] T-Rex [Xiaolin Showdown]

Theodore Rex [Theodore Rex] Baby T [Crash Bandicoot]

Hauzer [Red Earth] Stumpy [Dinosaur Revolution]

Kaosseffexx Ultimasauria [Ben 10] Cosmic Allosaurus [Dinosaur Arcade]

Terry [Dinosaur King] Taurox's Carnotaurus [Deadsound's Dinosauria/Sauria]

Quincy (Dream) [Foxtrot] Quantasaurus Rex [Power Rangers]

Mecha Drago [Earthbound] Tinkerbelle [Dinosaur Revolution]

[thiswasinevitableid]

Cactus Gorge (Sternclay)

For the yeehawgust "chaps n spurs" prompt poll, the tied winner was "cactus blossom." This fill is NSWF and does reference violence.

Cactus Blossom Gorge is said to be the prettiest place west of the Rockies. In the spring, the cacti bloom in waves of pink and orange, leaving the air almost candied in its sweetness and the vistas like a watercolor. 

Barclay’s never had a reason to be in the canyon until now; it’s a day's ride from town, is steep and treacherous to descend, and is rumored to be home to a race of monsters. So, the fact that the blossoms can be boiled into syrups that make desserts taste amazing (and sell out faster than his flapjacks) has always taken second place to staying alive.

He wouldn’t be here now if it weren’t for the fucking kidnapping. 

He’d been hired out as a day cook for a party of wealthy tourists from back east. He didn’t take those jobs often, but with summer on the horizon, visitors to Kepler Desert will get scarcer, so he took the generous fee and left Moira to run the kitchen. 

It should have been easy; pack a picnic and drinks, show off cooking on the campfire at dusk, then call it a day. But the group hired a guide they met at the station, rather than asking in town. 

Turns out the guide was a member of the Copperhead Gang, looking for a fat mouse to lead straight into a trap. 

So now he’s stuck here, five days later, arms tied except for when the bandits demand he cook something. They’ve left his legs undone, because his first escape attempt was also his last; he can afford the broken nose. If they get his fingers, like they promised they would, he’ll be fucked when he gets back home. 

If he gets back home. 

He’s laying on his side, in the shade of a boulder, wondering if anyone is looking for him. Mama, Aubrey, all his friends, they must be worried sick, must know what happened. The gang left the bodies there for the coyotes, after all. 

But what if the sheriff and his men assumed Barclay’s body had just been dragged off? Told everyone it was a shame, that they’d catch the varmits eventually (as they’ve been saying for the last four months, in spite of there now being bounty hunters prowling the desert, looking to catch what they clearly can’t).

Dirt crunches behind him. Before he can sit up, a kick catches his upper back. 

“Up. Buddy shot some quails.”

Barclay spends the sunset plucking the birds, cooking them over the fire. Sprinkles a seasoning blend over them; he intended to make these assholes eat the blandest food alive, but after they threatened to cut out his tongue since it was clear he wasn’t using it to taste, he’s been using his special mixture on sad stews and shot birds.

The leader, Bobby, snarls that he better not overcook it. Or he’ll end up like the last cook. 

Barclay tries not to think about the last cook. The guy must have had friends and family, must have sat by the fire with these same copperheads circling him, hoping someone would save him. 

(“Copperheads” he can hear his friend Duck’s voice in his head, “we ain’t even got those out here.”)

The meal is good enough to keep him alive, though he gets ash kicked on his shirt and nearly in his eyes for trying to snag a stray piece of skin. 

Then he’s tied up by the boulder once again, eyes stinging, stomach rumbling, and hope fading. 

It’s when empty plates are being scraped that one of the men says, “Where’d Mike go?”

“Powder room.” Bobby chuckles, still pleased with his idea to call the privacy granted by some stones twenty paces from camp. 

“No I know, but he’s not back. Ain’t been since the start of dinner.”

“Then eat his share and shut up.”

“I’m worried-”

“Then you go check on him.”

A set of footsteps disappears into the darkness. 

“Boss!” Buddy’s call is cut off, like someone knocked him out. 

“What in the hell-” Another of the men, the one closest to Barclay, stands. Barclay rolls over in time to see him disappear the moment he steps out of the shrinking ring of firelight. 

Guns are drawn now and Barclay curls further against the rock as bullets ricochet off stones and get stuck in cacti. A rock hit’s one of the remaining three men in the head, and when they all turn to shoot at the thrower, Barclay watches a huge, lithe figure dart past the fire, a tail kicking up sand to douse the flames. 

The darkness only makes the gang fire more panicked shots. One man turns to flee, only to scream a moment later, and then there’s a horrible, clicking sound as the remaining henchman is dragged from view by clawed hands. 

“Come out and fight me, fucker!” Bobby screams. 

The monster is back, leaping from the surrounding boulders directly onto the outlaw. There’s a struggle, a moment of panicked, sobbing screaming, and then nothing as the creature sinks its teeth into Bobby’s neck. 

Barclay is shaking, hands over his mouth, praying to anything that might listen that the thing hasn’t seen him. 

The narrow head raises, then snaps his direction. Eyes, glowing eerily, faintly blue, lock onto him, and the beast stands. 

Barclay closes his eyes. But the creature doesn’t move. 

Or he thinks it doesn’t. When he opens them, it’s nearly to him on silent, clawed feet. 

At this point he’s hiding his face in his arms, trying to do something, anything, rather than shake and whimper like a whipped dog. 

“It’s okay.” The monster’s tone is cool but not unkind, and Barclay does not feel any less like a hound when it says, “it’s okay. I won’t hurt you.”

He freezes as it grips his arms, but a moment later the ropes drop away. 

“Can you stand?”

He nods, lets the creature lift him until he has no choice but to take his weight or risk his feet leaving the dirt. Then the hands retreat, falling by dark-furred thighs. Barclay wills himself to look up; the monster is a head taller than him, face close to that of a wolf yet narrower, with a small mane of fur. It’s arms and legs are long, it’s tail like one of the lizards Duck is always trying to get to eat the ants who attack his garden. Short spines sit along it’s back from below it’s shoulders to it’s tailbone. 

It takes Barclay a moment to register that the spines are poking through a men's shirt. No, not poking, it looks like it’s been tailored to let them through. 

He looks down again; since when do monsters wear pants?

“Since I was able to get some made to fit. But I’m guessing you didn’t mean to say that out loud.”

“S-sorry.” He looks away, “I, I don’t, I can’t…” he hugs himself, “what’s going on?”

“The short version is I don’t believe in letting murderers escape justice. The longer version is I’m a bounty hunter, they’re my quarry, and your friends back in Kepler will be so glad to see you.”

“How did-”

“You’re Barclay Cobb, right?” 

“Yeah. Yeah I am.” He feels like he’s speaking from far away. Like he’s about to wake up and discover he’s still tied by the boulder. He shivers; it gets so cold in the canyons at night, it isn’t fair. 

“I’m Joseph.” The monster extends his hand and Barclay shakes it, “Let’s get you somewhere more comfortable for the night, Mr. Cobb.” 

“You can call me Barclay. Basically everyone does.”

A smile, charming in spite of the sharp teeth, “I can manage that.”

He follows his rescuer out of the camp, doing his best to pick his way over small rocks and patches of plants without any moonlight for help. After his third, near-miss with a cactus, Joseph pauses. 

“Do you want to take my hand? Night vision has its perks.”

Barclay takes the offered hand, holding tighter than he really means to as Joseph winds them through the canyon and up onto a ledge the size of a homestead. Barclay can make out the shape of an abandoned Pony Express depot; they’d tried to place one here once upon a time, only to half complete it before the express stopped running. 

Joseph holds the door, allowing Barclay to pass inside. He stands awkwardly in the dark as there’s a rustling of a drawer, a thwick of a match, and a lantern springing to life. 

The inside of the building is shockingly tidy; there’s a small bookshelf, a bed that’s been made as neatly as if they were in a hotel, and small wardrobe that looks like it’s been fucking dusted. 

He glances down at himself and growls in frustrated disgust; his clothes are a mess of dust, sweat, spit, and blood both his own and not. 

“Let’s see, order of operations…” Joseph is moving through clearly familiar motions, lighting lamps and opening doors, checking cabinets and running his claws though the fur atop his head. 

“Please tell me there’s somewhere I can rinse off? Or change?”

“There’s a spring in the hillside. I have a towel somewhere, and I should be able to find you something of mine to wear.”

Barclay looks toward the back door where Joseph gestured. He can’t go out there. What if the gang isn’t all dead, what if one of them comes looking, what if Joseph isn’t the only one of his kind out here and the others aren’t nearly as friendly-

“Or” Joseph is studying his face, taking in his huddled posture, “I could fetch a few buckets of water and bring them in.”

“Please?”

“Make yourself comfortable.” Joseph picks up two wooden buckets and slips through the door. Barclay hears that same clicking, not as menacing, and the words, “here Nessa, brought you some blossoms.”

Barclay is still trying to figure out why someone like Joseph needs to ride a horse when his host returns, buckets sloshing slightly as Barclay holds the door for him. 

“Here we go.” Joseph pulls over a stool, then sorts through the wardrobe, pulling out a washcloth and a bar of ivory soap and presenting them to Barclay, “there’s not much privacy so I, um” his spines ripple a moment, “I promise I’ll keep my eyes elsewhere.”

“Don’t mind if you peek, not like I haven’t been naked around guys before. But if you want a show, I might charge you.” 

Fuck, where did that come from? 

“Sorry, I, that was weird.” 

Joseph lays a hand on his forearm, “You don’t need to apologize. You’ve been out here for close to a week, scared out of your mind and being mistreated. People say all kinds of things when they’re stressed. Or coming out of it.”

The hand retreats, the claws brushing his skin making him want to sigh and melt, to beg Joseph to trace them over him again. 

The water is cold, Barclay’s skin going goosebumped after only a few minutes of scrubbing himself, but just being able to get clean makes him want to cry with relief. 

When he’s done, he hangs the cloth on the little washline strung up on one of the windows, and picks up the towel Joseph left for him. He turns as he finishes tying it around his waist, and catches Joseph looking quickly back down at the newspaper he’s reading at the little table. 

“I found a shirt that should work” Joseph stands, handing him the white fabric, “but none of my pants will fit you. The ones I wear, you’ll be swimming in, and the ones I have for a human body won’t fit someone as big as you.” His eyes stay politely on Barclay’s face, but the spines ripple again, “this should at least let you make a very comfy skirt.”

“Thanks.” Barclay takes the clothes, pulls on the shirt and wraps the soft blanket around his waist in place of the towel as Joseph pours them water and sets out a handkerchief with some hard tack and cured, even harder sausage. 

He sips his water, finds it floral and bright, “Cactus blossoms?”

“It’s what I grew up putting in water jugs. If you don’t like it I can-”

“No, no I like it. Just surprised me. Kind of a delicacy up in town.” He takes another sip, “does that mean you, like, live down here?”

“Only sometimes; it’s often a better base camp if I’m hunting than town is. And since this stretch of canyon technically is my family territory, it does feel like home.” 

Something about the way he says ‘technically” suggests a sore spot, and so Barclay flicks his gaze to the folded newspaper, looking for a new topic. 

“You were solving the chess problem?”

A smile, “Yes! This was a quick one, at least for me. Do you want to give it a try?”

“Maybe after dinner. I try to solve those when it’s slow at the Lodge. I like the little mystery they’ve been running in the town paper lately, too.”

“Yes.” Joseph nods emphatically, “those are so tricky, I love the challenge.”

“Y’know they’re actually by the McElroy’s youngest? Kid’s got quite a mind for puzzles.” He snickers, “they’ve been coming to Lodge long enough I remember when his brother went through a phase where he’d only eat beans.”

“At the restaurant or…”

“Nope, period, poor Mrs. McElroy kept coming to me for recipes…”

They eat up the remainder of their dry, but pleasant, dinner discussing some of Barclay’s stranger customer requests, and Joseph’s memory of a fellow bounty hunter who seemed to survive on Parsons Cashews alone. 

Joseph insists Barclay take the bed for the evening, so he settles himself on top of the quilt with the chess puzzle as Joseph snuffs out all but the nearest lamp and goes to check on Nessa one final time. 

Barclay holds his breath the entire time his host is outside, afraid he’ll hear a thud and then a human face will peer through the door. 

Joseph returns unscathed, tipping the last of the water into Barclay’s cup before setting himself in a chair with a book of ghost stories. The wind in the canyon is picking up, carrying blossoms past the windows as it rattles them. 

Once he solves the puzzle, Barclay flips to a new page, reading the mystery for the day and solving it a bit faster than he’d hoped. Then he reads the news, then the want ads, then advertisements. 

He’s considering starting the paper all over again when Joseph yawns, “I think we ought to turn in for the night. We have a long ride back to town tomorrow.”

“Yeah. Good point.” Barclay sets the paper away and crawls beneath the blankets. Joseph murmurs a goodnight and Barclay responds with the same. 

Then he lays there. Wide awake. His brain plays the same song of “what if” over and over again; what if Joseph didn’t get them all? What if one escaped and brought back friends? What if Bobby was just playing dead and is waiting for them to sleep so he can sneak in and gut Barclay like a trout?

The window shakes again and he winces. 

“Everything okay?” Joseph’s eyes glow up at him from the floor. 

“Are you sure they’re all dead?”

Joseph sits up, “No. Because I didn’t kill them.”

“What?” 

“I paralyzed them. My bite can do that, and I have enough practice to know how hard and long a bite I need to give in order to keep them out and immobile until I can round them tomorrow and take them into town. I…prefer to at least let there be a trial before someone dies. If you hadn’t been here I might have just tossed them all into the cart I have waiting and started for town, but you needed rest. And care. Besides” his smile is a little bitter, and a little ashamed, “I also don’t feel too bad if someone who murders people in cold blood loses a toe to a coyote because my bite has them too paralyzed to run.”

Barclay nods, trying to take all that in at once. 

Joseph leans forward, resting a hand on his knee, “I’m good at what I do, Barclay. But even if somehow, someone slipped out of it and came here, I wouldn’t let them hurt you.”

“Thank you.” He takes Joseph’s hand, clinging to it, “fuck, I’m sorry, I know we need to sleep but I can’t, it’s awful, I keep jumping at every sound and when I close my eyes I see them leering over me or, or I see, see what they did, what I only survived because they’d seen me at the campfire.” He holds tighter, “I’m so tired. I could barely sleep because of how scared I was, or because they thought it was fucking funny to kick me awake.”

A low, rapid click, as Joseph’s tail twitches. Then he clears his throat, rubbing his thumb over Barclay’s knuckles, “Is there some way to help you relax.”

He starts to shake his head, then meets Joseph’s eyes, “What happens if you give someone a little bite?”

The spines straighten a moment, then relax, “It depends on how little. If it’s very small, it will produce a sense of relaxation and mild euphoria. You’ll still be lucid, but it might be easier to sleep if your body isn’t holding all that tension.” 

“Please bite me.” 

“You’re sure? I can try to think of something else, I don’t want it to backfire and leave you feeling helpless or like I’m hurting you-”

“Please” He says again, rolling onto his side, “I…I trust you.”

Joseph studies his face a moment, then lifts Barclay’s left hand. Carefully, he brings the tip of the thumb to his mouth, parting his lips. A hint of pressure, then a sting, and before Barclay even finishes gasping his monster is setting his hand gingerly back down on the mattress. 

“How long does…does..” he blinks, suddenly finding his legs and neck heavy, but not unpleasantly so.

Joseph chuckles, “It happens incredibly quickly. In humans it’s almost instantaneous, but even for my kind, a bite only takes thirty seconds at most to kick in.”

“You bite each other? Like when you’re fighting?” The image of Joseph attacking Bobby comes back to him, but this time his mind lingers on how graceful Joseph was, how swiftly and smoothly he rescued him. 

“Sometimes, but we love a debate more than a fistfight for settling arguments. Even if the debates take longer and can result in more bad blood in the end. But we do more biting with, um, with mates. Lovers. These mouths aren’t exactly as easy to kiss with as a human one is, so love biting takes its place.” The spines are rippling again, and Joseph is looking away from him. 

Barclay reaches down, pulling Joseph’s hand up to his mouth. Then he turns it, palm up, and bites down on the soft, short fur and the skin beneath. 

Joseph yips, surprised, but doesn’t pull away until Barclay lets him go. 

“It’s not nice to tease, big guy.” He murmurs, tracing a line along the edge of Barclay’s beard. 

“Not teasing. Was trying to kiss you. Besides, you just called me big guy.”

“It slipped out.” Joseph’s posture suggests he’s blushing, “Barclay, you’re incredibly handsome, and I’d fuck you in a heartbeat if I knew that’s what you wanted. But I don’t want you to do anything with me you might regret. Like sleeping with someone whose appearance scares the hell out of you.”

“I mean, it did.” Barclay tries to scoot closer but can’t without risking falling out of bed, “but it doesn’t now. Now I know you’re Joseph and not just something waiting in the dark to tear my throat out. And you’re, uh, It’s” he drags a hand over his face, “I almost never find guys who are bigger than me and it’s so fucking hot and it makes me feel so safe. Felt that way before you bit me, too.”

“In that case…” Joseph pulls the blanket off him, “you can bite me as many times as you like.”

Barclay undoes the knot on his makeshift skirt as quickly as his fingers allow, letting it fall open under Joseph’s appreciative gaze. A different noise bubbles from the monster’s throat, more a purr than a click, and he bends forward, tongue longer than humans lapping at Barclay’s cock as he cradles it in one palm. 

“Ohhhhfuck, fuck, Joseph it, that feels incredible.” He’s heard of people paying to have wax dripped on them during sex, and maybe that’s because it feels like this; warm without being painful, smooth as it covers his skin and leaves him tingling. 

“Better test it a few more times to be sure.” Joseph swirls his tongue over the head, licks lovingly up and down his shaft from every side. The claws of his free hand run with a comforting prickle along Barclay’s thigh and card through the hair on his stomach and chest with obvious pleasure. 

He’s weightless, he’s in heaven, he’s getting the best head of his life. 

And he’s not getting hard. 

“Fuck” he groans, frustrated. 

Joseph sits up, though his hand continues stroking and teasing Barclay’s cock, “What’s wrong?”

“I can’t, I think I’m too exhausted, or stressed or something, I can’t get it up, I’m sorry.”

“My sweet Barclay. That’s nothing to apologize for.” Joseph leans down, nuzzling his cheek, “All you have to do right now is let me take care of you, however feels good. Besides” the tongue drags up his throat, “who said anything about us needing your cock?”

“Fuck, yes” Barclay tries to spread his legs, but they feel as if they’re too heavy, or as if he’s too far away from them somehow.

“Oh, big guy, has it been too long?” He says it with genuine sympathy as he rolls Barclay onto his front.

“Uh huh, fuck, people get one look at my dick and they, they think I wanna be in charge, wanna be on top, fuck” he gasps, clutching for the pillows as Joseph’s tongue runs from his neck down to his ass. 

“Well, they can have their narrow ideas while you and I have a great time.” Joseph nuzzles the top of his head this time with a happy sigh, “now, be a good boy and hold still for me.”

“You’re not gonna prep me?” Fear reemerges, threatening to spread through his system in a wave. 

“It’s a little different with my, well, set-up,” 

Barclay glances back; Joseph’s cock is thinner than a humans but a good seven or eight inches long, absolutely dripping with something golden and sticky,  with short, knobbly spines scattered across it. 

“They won’t hurt. Here, feel.” He rubs the shaft along Barclays ass with a hungry growl as the spines bend, soft and flexible. 

“Okay.” Barclay takes a deep breath, spreading his knees wider, “okay.”

The tip of the cock presses into him with ease, whatever’s slicking its way seeming to open him as it does. Joseph wraps an arm around his middle, sets the other hand on top of Barclay’s own, “I’ve got you big guy.”

Joseph works his hips in short, deliberate thrusts, his cocking sliding deeper and deeper until he’s flush against Barclay’s ass and Barclay is nearly clawing the sheets from how good it feels. The spines rub against him, finding sensitive spots he’s not even sure he knew existed before now as Joseph’s breathing picks up. 

“You feel so good, big guy. I think I might just stay here all night. If you can’t sleep, I could just keep fucking you until you’re too tire to keep your eyes open.”

“Fuck, yeah” He moans, trying to push back to meet the thrusts but finding his limbs to relaxed to do anything but keep him how Joseph has arranged him. 

“Mmmm” Joseph laughs into his neck, then trills and clicks when Barclay turns to nip at his forearm, “maybe that’s my real reward for this bounty. Not the money, but the chance to demand that because I saved your life, I get to find you every night and fuck you until you’re dripping and so relaxed that all you can do lay there and let me be good to you.”

“Yes, fuck, yes, Josephohfuck” His toes curl as Joseph picks up the pace, his cock finally responding to being ground against the bed. 

“That’s it big guy, let go for me. You’re mine, I’ve got you, I’ll never let anyone hurt you ever again, I take care of you, I will, ohfuck, shit” he pulses into Barclay, working his hips frantically as Barclay rocks against the quilt, desperate to cum. Eventually Joseph gets his breath back, little clicks and purrs leaving him as he whispers, “I love feeling watching you fuck my cum back into that perfect ass.”

Barclay cums with a weak cry against the sheets, Joseph rubbing his sides and doing his best to kiss his shoulders as he shakes and twitches through it. 

There’s a mess on the quilt the instant he pulls out, but neither of them minds. Instead, Joseph curls around him, promising him he’s safe, telling him how wonderfully he did, and Barclay falls asleep petting soft, black fur. 

—---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Barclay steps into the morning light to find Joseph hitching Nessa to a wagon full of bleary-eyed, terrified outlaws who, upon seeing Barclay, begin begging him not to let the monster get them. 

“It’s funny, what heat and liquor can do a man.” Joseph produces a silver ring and slips it over his finger. Suddenly there’s no monster to be seen, just a tall, black-haired man with blue eyes and the most charming smile Barclay’s ever seen. 

“Agreed. Makes people see things that aren’t there.” Barclay steps beside Joseph, ignoring the ongoing shouts from the wagon to press a kiss to his cheek. 

Joseph passes him the reins to one of the outlaw’s horses, “We should hit Kepler before sunset. I need to take these men to the jail and collect my bounty.”

“Any idea what you’re gonna spend it on?” Barclay climbs into the saddle and Joseph does the same. 

The bounty hunter sets a black hat onto his head as blossoms begin dancing in the breeze, “How about taking you to dinner?”

[contentloadingandstuff]

Sara and Yelan X Fatui reader, Reader keeps their involvement with the Fatui a secret. Yelan/Sara end up stumbling upon a fatui operation one day and see Reader helping lead it, Yelan/Sara gets found and surrounded. Reader has to decide to either let their SO die, or betray the Fatui, they decide to Betray the Fatui. (Perhaps reader taking a nasty blow for their SO, losing a limb or just a really bad wound because of it)

Love and Betrayal - Kujou Sara & Yelan x Fatui!Reader

Genre: Angst with comfort

Characters: Kujou Sara & Yelan

Pairing: GN!Reader

A/N: Hello, anon! This took some time, but I hope you'll like it :)

TW: Disability, some general violance and blood. Yelan's part is more lighthearted than Sara's.

Kujou Sara

You landed on the street at the age of three.

Inazuma's problems were many and varied, but the most severe of them was banditry. Any change in the outside world caused ripples in the islands' society, leaving many jobless and desperate to make a living. Those individuals often joined The Treasure Hoarders, or rejected their penniless masters and pursued the path of the ronin. Those 'free spirits' took any and all jobs they could get, not unwilling to steal, rob, threaten or... murder.

The intercommission relationships were never pleasant, but conflicts between families were generally rare. And when they happened, things usually got very nasty very quickly. Your family experienced this first-hand when you found out a member of the Kujou clan was taking bribes from a group of ronin to cover their misdeeds. Having more money than sense, he hired those same rogues to make your clan... less interested in his deals. And they honored their contract.

You managed to survive the slaughter, saved by a friend of your family. They couldn't give you a new home, as they feared retaliation. You understood that only later, but it was soul crushing back then. You had to live off of stealing and begging for a few months, sleeping in any corner that provided any cover from the cold, oceanic winds.

In your lowest point, there was a single party who stretched out their hand. The Fatui. They took you in as an orphan, gave you clothing, food, and a roof over your head. Not one of your caretakers abused you, in fact they provided a sense of belonging matching that your parents offered. Even though you slowly understood that your fate was sealed, you didn't mind. It was far better than starving on the cobbled paths.

When you reached the age of sixteen, an interesting twist of fate brought a new hope into your life. The same friend that saved you thirteen years ago handed a heavy bag of Mora to one of the orphanage's head caretakers, and you got a chance. If you accepted to become a Skirmisher, you could re-enter civilian society as a free person. Well, as free as your work would allow.

This was no offer to refuse.

Over the next two years you went through hell. Among the standard body alterations, hard living conditions, grueling training and harsh drill sergeants only the strongest prevailed. You were lucky to be one of those.

You returned to Inazuma, and slammed against a huge wall of disappointment.

There were no adrenaline-filled battles the brochures described. It turned out that the most exciting thing your team did was beat up a few ronin every now and then. It was a let down, sure, but you soon grew more and more appreciative of your job. For such Mora, standing around some big shot for twelve hours a day was a steal. The boredom was overwhelming most of the time, but your comrades made it more bearable. Despite their job, they were decent and honorable people at heart.

Your civilian life was dull, until that fateful day.

The day when you first saw her.

You were taking a stroll outside Inazuma city, when a soft voice caught your attention. You approached the source carefully, as to not disturb the beautiful singing. Hidden behind a boulder, you observed the singer. Sara was sitting by a spring, carefully waxing her wings and humming a folk song you've heard ages ago. The sight was too much for you, and your legs carried you towards the Tengu.

Sara was surprised, bashful even. You caught her off-guard in a moment of great vulnerability, and she was quite ready to turn you into a pin cushion. After explaining that you had no ill intent, Sara begrudgingly allowed you to join her. It was awkward at first, but you got the conversation flowing with some effort. The Tengu didn't talk much, but she soon eased into a casual discussion about the recent events in Inazuma.

After you parted, you accepted that she wouldn't want to see you again. Still, you frequented the same route you met her on, some part of you wishing to find her there once more.

And you found her there again.

Once, twice, thrice.

Your hangouts became a regular occurance. Sara never pushed you away, no matter how angry she was. Your gentle, friendly voice was able to calm even the greatest of her inner tempests. She enjoyed your company any time, and Sara soon started seeking you out during her breaks or free time. Her view of you changed one day, when you brought her freshly made Onigiri on the start of her day.

She understood that the warm, fuzzy feeling inside her chest whenever she saw you meant you were something more.

She told you so, on a cold, but tranquil evening. Being more than in love with her by that point, you told her you felt the same.

You shared your first kiss, long and passionate, next to the stream you first met at.

Kujou Sara started being more and more insistent on you moving in with her. She wanted to be closer to you, spend every free minute of her day with you by her side. You understood that, but there was a problem.

You never told her.

Yet, you fulfilled her wish. It was not hard to hide your gun and outfit, seeing as she provided you not only a room of your own, but also valued your privacy. Your rifle rested under your bed, carefully wrapped in bed sheets, and the uniform was tucked on the back of your wardrobe. You checked its exact position whenever you returned, and by the way it remained untouched it seemed she was still oblivious.

You promised yourself you'd tell her someday. You'd tell her when you would be ready.

Yet fate had a different plan for you two.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

You hiss as a large, gloved hand unwraps the bandages covering your left hand. 

"Hurts that bad?"

 "Well, it isn't pleasant" you respond, pulling up your sleeve. 

Sunlight falls on the scorched, pale skin. Red stains are littered across your forearm, delivering stinging pain to your body. An antiseptic fluid is poured on them, causing you to flinch and clench your hand. 

"Easy there, Y/N" The Hydrogunner says, withdrawing the bottle. "I'm almost done".

The Fatui places a tissue on the wound, and rubs it up and down slowly. After drying it, a new bandage is placed on your arm. 

"You should really ease up on using your Delusion. I don't want to see you falling apart before we can earn the big bucks". Your commander, a hulking man named Pietro, pats you on the back. 

"Pfeh. I can last those three days no problem" you respond. 

"Something to help with the pain, hm?", the medic of your team, nicknamed Lean, offers you his hip flask. 

You grab it, and, after taking a swing, hand it to Pietro.

"Storm the front!" 

You turn your head, only to see an Electro-infused arrow flying your way.

Is that Sa-

Before your mind can fully process this question, the projectile crashes against a Geo shield. 

"Nice try", your geochanter shouts from behind you. 

You get up, and pull your mask down on your face before summoning your weapon. In front of you stands Sara, wings fully revealed and another arrow ready. Next to her are a few Shogunate soldiers wielding spears. 

"Ha! That all you got?"Pietro taunts, hammer in hand. 

"Apprehend them!", Sara orders, and her men move in to execute. 

The other Pyroslinger fired his weapon before you managed to load yours. Pietro was already rushing at the enemy, Delusion crackling with lightning. With a sideways swipe, he sends three infantrymen flying back. Sara jumps up, wings striking the air to give herself a boost, and fires another missile. It pierces through the shield this time, and lands right next to you. You go down on one knee, and lift your gun to your eye. 

It's either you or her right now. 

You fire, and your Delusion ignites the round. It pierces the air, and pierces Sara's largest left wing with ease. The pain causes her to flinch, sending her arrow sideways. It still lands, striking the Geochanter in his shoulder. As his wounded body falls back, your hands load another bullet into your weapon with practiced ease. You aim, and fire again. You miss, the round whizzing through the air right past her stomach. You reach into your pouch, but before you can load again, a Hydro blast strikes Sara right in the chest. She is knocked off balance, and plummets to the ground. Sara, along with her bow, lands on the sand with a dull thud. 

Your heart is still pounding with adrenaline as you rise up, rifle still pointed at the Tengu. It's awkwardly quiet around. You search the surrounding are with your sight, spotting many purple-clad bodies on the beach. 

It's over? 

Your muscles relax at last. You turn your head back. Your colleagues are standing a few meters from the lying Sara in a semi circle. Alfi is still clutching his shoulder, arrow now broken off. Your eyes land on Pietro's hammer, and that's what stops your heart rate from lowering. 

"You really thought you could beat us with these newbies? You're an idiot, little birdie."

Pietro's tone was harsh. You knew what that meant. 

You had to think. You had to think fast. It was clear your coworkers would kill Sara, given a few more seconds. You called off your weapon. 

Convincing them wouldn't be possible, since she shot Alfi and attacked you. 

Snatching her away isn't an option. Explaining yourself out of that would be impossible, and if you ran, they would shoot you. 

You had to… kill them, then. But your rifle wouldn't do it at all. Too slow to kill all four before they would smoke you. 

Your hands dive into your pockets, and soon find two ignition grenades. Your commander is saying something, but you aren't listening. 

You take a deep breath, and start counting. 

One. You pull the safety off of the explosives. Judging by their relaxed stances, your comrades didn't notice the hiss. 

Two. You run forward, and drop the grenades beneath their feet. Your keep running. 

Three. You charge at Sara, who's still too surprised by your actions to move a muscle. You tackle her to the ground, shielding her body with your own. 

Four. 

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The door slides open, revealing the familiar, red crow mask. Supporting yourself with your right arm, you move into a sitting position. 

She approaches the hospital bed, bowl of miso broth in her hands. Your eyes follow her movements. She places the food on your nightstand, and sits down on the edge of the cot. 

"Good morning. How are you feeling?" she asks. 

"Hello to you too, Sara. I'm… eh. I'm alright" you answer, grabbing the spoon she brought with herself.

You two sit in silence as you eat the soup. Sara looks at your scorched back, and frowns. It's the second week of your recovery from the explosion. The fire caused much damage to your back and left side of the body. Even though Sara ran as fast as she could, it was too late to save your left arm. Now, a small cape covered the stump whenever you left the house. Sara was with you every day, providing you meals and changing your bandages daily. 

"Y/N."

"Hm?"

"I'm… sorry I charged you back then. I got carried away. "

You turn to her, a mocking smile on your lips. 

"Pinch me, because I think I'm dreaming. You decided to tell me that just now... Could you say that again, my love? I'm not sure if I heard that right..." you tease.

Sara pouts, crosses her arms and turns away. You can't hold back a laugh at her childish behavior. You put down the spoon, and raise your hand to her cheek. 

"It's alright, it's alright. I'm sorry as well. I should have told you earlier." 

She turns back to you. Her golden eyes look into yours with gentle, unsure affection. You stay like that for a moment, before you drop your arm and look down. Silence falls again.

"Sara… thank you for letting me bury them."

"Don’t mention it." 

Your hand feels around for hers, She catches it in her gentle grip.

Yelan

Poverty is one hell of a motivation.

For a normal person, like you were once, the thought of not having enough Mora to purchase bread or rice is as unreal as a second Kaenri’ah. The gods have their own plan, and lead fate uncaring of mortal needs or desires however. Despite your greatest efforts, the image of eating bark soup started becoming terrifyingly real with each passing day.

When the mining company you were a guard in bankrupted, you needed new work. The job market at the time was not really in need of military personnel, as the Milelith were more than enough to handle the occasional bunch of Treasure Hoarders or Hilichurls. After the Traveler’s adventure in Liyue, however, there was one party who needed new soldiers. 

The Fatui.

It turned out that the company didn’t go broke, but was shut down for involvement with them. Thanks to their excellent intelligence, they didn’t have to ask any questions at the interview. You came into the room to see a contract ready to sign, a Pyro Delusion right next to it. After seeing the wage, you did not think twice about signing it. 

And so began your new life, a life of full coffers and blood on your hands. 

There weren’t any Snezhnayans eager to enlist after the whole sea god fiasco, so field Pyro Agents were in demand. It was dangerous work, especially in Liyue where the counterintelligence office was going strong. With your quick thinking and experience in the field, you managed to outlive most of your coworkers and advance in the ranks, soon gaining the title of Inspector. 

You gambled and slept by day, and slit throats at night. 

On one of your visits to the casino to get rid of that annoying surplus of Mora in your safe, you met a certain blue-haired woman. The dice she presented were exquisite, so much so that the fact they were weighted flew over your fellow players’ heads. She didn’t manage to fool your trained hand, though. You flirted with her, and asked her to go have a cigarette outside. When you got there, you remarked about her cheating. She only shrugged. It’s not like the stakes were high, she said. Most people who come here don’t need the money anyways. She stated that she didn’t need it either - it just weighed her pockets down so pleasantly. You laughed at her honesty, and audacity. 

She found your keen eye and quick wit alluring as well, so you started dating. You hung out during the day, as the two of you worked mostly during the dark hours. The fact that Yelan was an agent wasn’t a secret, especially to Fatui. But your involvement was well hidden by you. Yelan employed a ‘don’t ask, don’t tell’ policy that made it easier. Any of her attempts to follow you were quickly foiled, as your ears and eyes were now more than trained to catch anything suspicious. At some point, she gave up on spying on you. You didn’t tell or report anything about Yelan to your superiors. It’s not like you meet during work hours, right? Plus, things like what’s her favorite tea type or time of the year weren’t very valuable. 

You still aren’t sure if you overestimated her abilities, or underestimated those of your subordinates. 

—----------------------------------------------------------------------------

You lean against the wall as two Skirmishers enter the room, dragging a person behind them. 

It’s clearly a tall woman in civilian clothing. She has a plain bag over her head, and a gag in her mouth as well, judging by the noises she makes. 

“Here.” You point at a lone chair in the middle of the room. 

The soldiers force her into a sitting position, and not without difficulty. She struggles hard against your underlings, but their iron grip doesn’t let out. They tie her hands behind the headrest.

“Remove the bag. Let’s see what we have here.”

They oblige. When the cover is lifted, your heart drops.

You can see the spark of anger and resistance in her pupils for a brief moment. She looks around the room, and when her eyes land on your unmasked face, they soften. She stops her struggling, as surprised by this as you are.

“Yhnmh?” she mumbles, eyes wide. 

You stare at each other for a while in complete silence. Her face is scratched and bruised. The confusion in her gaze turned into sadness and… fear.

You’re dragged back to reality when one of the guards holds up a Hydro vision in his outstretched arm. You take it up, any leftover doubt about her identity disappearing. You clutch the gemstone in your hand. 

“Appreciated. Leave me with the prisoner for now. Wait outside.”

You wait a few seconds after they close the door, making sure that nobody will hear your conversation. You look back to Yelan, and pull up an old chair from the corner of the room. 

“Got yourself into quite the predicament, haven’t you, my dear?”

Yelan looks down at the gag quickly, and returns her gaze to you. You shake your head.

“Listen, I’m not going to remove the gag. For now, at least. I want to make sure you hear all of what I’m going to say here. Okay?”

She nods. You spill the beans. You tell her why you joined, who you are in the Fatui and assure her that you weren’t spying on her at any point. She nods along, now more at ease. 

After you’re done, you sigh. A moment of silence. 

“You know what they’ll do to you now, don’t you?”

Yelan looks down, averting her gaze. 

“An interrogation will take place. Either you tell them what they need to know and you’ll be killed, or they’ll… we will torture you to death.”

She looks downcast, and you immediately regret teasing her this way.

“Come on, Yelan! I’m kidding. I’ll get you out of here. But… we have to wait for a good moment to do so. There will be a change of shifts in about an hour. Until then, I’ll have to act out my role.”

You remove the gag, and Yelan spits out some dirt and sand. 

“Listen. They will torture you for a bit, but don’t worry - I’ll tell them to go easy on you. We don’t want to raise suspicions, right?”

She nods. “Right. I can take it.”

“That’s my Yelan. Put on a show for them. Make them really work for it, alright?”

“Mhm.”

You smile, and she returns the expression. You get up and walk closer to her, leaning down and grabbing her tied hand in yours. You place a kiss on her lips. 

“I’ll be back, I promise. Stay strong for me. I love you.”

You make for the door, her Vision still in hand. You leave the room, and all eyes are immediately on you. Turning your attention to the two guards, you speak.

“Begin your work. I need her name, rank, number and names of her superiors. But go easy on her, for now at least.”

They nod, and you walk up to your desk. After the door to the cell closes, you reach for a book on your shelf. Interrogation techniques, provided by command. 

The following hour is hard for the both of you. The screams and moans from the torture chamber make you cringe. The sounds of your girlfriend in pain paint grim images in your mind as you go through the book, checking all the tortures considered ‘light’. In your mind, you go over every possibility. You must have checked your medkit a good twenty times during this hour, making sure all the medical supplies you might need will be there. 

Finally, the hour passes. Six of the seven guards in the room make for the door, leaving only a single Pyroslinger, cleaning his weapon in silence. The two guards by the door go down the mountain side, leaving only one to guard the entrance to your hideout while the replacement gets here. You wait a few minutes, and go outside. 

The Vanguard by the door looks quite sleepy. Good for you. You pull out a cigarette, and offer the box to him. He takes one, and, using your Delusion, you light them.

“How did you catch her?” you inquire, pretending to be curious. That’s a story she can tell you herself.

You don’t really pay attention to what he is saying. Your cigarette is long put out on the ground as you prepare a garotte. Before he can finish, you jump up and tighten the weapon around his throat. He kneels down as warm, bright red blood pours down his neck. You wait until he stops gurgling, and kick his limp body down the mountain. As it plummets down, you enter the hideout again.

You march towards the cell, from which screams and moans still ring out. You grit your teeth. As you pass by the Pyroslinger, you leave a Pyro clone next to him. After you hear the chair fall over, you pull out a pair of flintlocks. 

You kick the door open. One of the guards turns around, but you greet him with a shot right in the ribs. The other falls down as well, his head painting the floor a deep crimson. You drop the spent weapons to the ground.

You quickly turn your attention towards Yelan. Her hands are now tied to the armrests, blood-red spots marking where her fingernails once were. Not a single one of them is still on. She keeps one of her eyes closed to prevent blood from her split eyebrow from getting into it. Half-dried blood traces come from her mouth. You gently open her mouth, revealing about five teeth missing in the back. You move to untie her. 

“Y-you’re back…”

“I promised, didn’t I? They messed you up a little. Can you walk?” you hand her her Vision back. She raises up shakily. 

“Yeah, I think so.”

“Good. Let’s go then.”

As you go through the door, time slows down. You see the wounded Pyroslinger on the floor, sitting up against the wall. His forearm is keeping his bowels from pouring out on the floor, and in conjunction with his other arm, it holds up his weapon. Pointed right at you. 

Before you can dash away, he pulls the trigger. 

The bullet rips through your stomach and you fly back. Yelan screams your name, before sending a few Hydro lines at the dying soldier, slicing his throat open. You press down your hands on the wound as she drags you to a wall. After sitting you up, she examines the wound. 

“The… liver. He shot me in the liver…” you force out through gritted teeth. Yelan takes off her shirt and rolls it into a makeshift bandage. 

“Just hold on, Y/N. I’ll get you out.” She wraps the bullet hole in the material, already stained red from the contact. You shake your head.

“No point. I’ll die, Yelan.” Blood pours through the material, getting in between Yelan’s shaking fingers. It’s hard for you to speak, as the pain is growing with each second. 

“No, no, you’ll be fine. Come on, you can’t leave. Not like that, please.”

An idea pops into your fading mind. 

“Vision. Use… your Vision. Heal me.”

“But I don’t know how!” She protests, small teardrops in the corners of her eyes. You grow paler with each second. 

“Try…” 

—----------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Tsk. You won again.”

Yelan chuckles, swiping the bag of Mora off the table. 

“Luck isn’t on your side today, my flower? Too bad!”

You roll your eyes. Even though the injury still hurts, your girl has been pestering you all the time. She managed to heal you at the last moment, and that gave her quite the scare. Ningguang told you that she’d never seen her so scared. The gambler obviously denied that, but you knew the truth.

“Hey. Take it easy. Drinks on me?” She must have noticed your downcast look. 

“Heh. Who am I to refuse this beautiful woman’s offer?”

She looks down, an over exaggerated expression of surprise on her face. 

“Well, looks like you can’t go with me… What a shame…” She hides her prize in her pocket. 

“Oh, just you wait Yelan. A week or two and I’m going to get back at you for this!”

You both chuckle. 

Thanks for reading!

[spade-riddles]

champagneproblesm asked:

Kinda tells a story when you pick the outro or last verse from each song backwards :

The only thing that's left is the manuscript. One last souvenir from my trip to your shores. Now and then i re read the manuscript. But the story isn't mine anymore

But now we'll curtail your curiosity in sweetness

She's been many places with men of many faces. First, they're off to the races. She's laughing drawin' aces. But, none of it is changin'. That the chariot is waitin'. Hearts are hers for the breakin. There's an escape in escaping OR she fell through the Ice then came black Alive.

But the woman who sits by the window has turned out the light

When the truth Comes out it's quiet. It's so quiet .

(I'm so afraid I sealed my fate no sign of soulmates. I'm just a paperweight in shades of greige) Spending my last coin so someone will tell it'll be ok

What if your eyes looked up and met mine one more time.

I pushed each boulder up that hill.

This place made me feel worthless

Your words were just still ringing in my head.

I'm hearing voices like a mad man

Leaving me bereft and reeling, my beloved ghost and me sitting in a tree D-Y-I-N-G

Can we watch our phantoms like watching wild horses, cooler in theory but not if you force it to be, it just didn't happen.

The devil that you know looks now more like an angel. I'm the life you chose and all this terrible danger OR she IS here to destroy you

Pick your poison, babe I'm poison either way

Now I want to sell my house and set fire to all my clothes and hire a priest to come and exorcise my demons. Even if I die screaming and I hope you hear it.

Only when your girlish glow flickers just so do they let you know i's hell on earth to be heavenly. Them's the breaksThey don't come gently

They said there was no chance, trying to be the greatest in the league.

You hung me on your wall, stabbed me with your push pins. In public, showed me off then sank in stoned oblivion cause once your queen had come you treat her like an also-ran. You didn't measure up in any measure of a man

Cause i'm miserable. And no one even knows. Try and Come for my job

Your arsons match your somber eyes. And i'll still see it till the day i die. (You're the loss of my life.)

Your good lord didn't need to lift a finger.

I am what i am cause you trained me. So who's afraid of little old me?

Am i allowed to cry ?

Go on fuck me up

I did my Time.

All the wine moms are still holding out but it's over.

You'll find someone.

Waving at the ship, fuck it if i can't have him

Left all these broken parts, told me i'm better of but i'm not

Who else decodes you ? or / i chose this cyclone with you

it won't start up 'til I touch, touch, touch you

it won't start up 'til I touch, touch, touch you (fortnight)

Then midnights

I can't find a pulse my Heart won't start anymore

have they come to take me away?

You should find another guiding light

Give me back my girlhood, it was mine first

It's been two thousand one hundred and 90 days of our love blackout. The system's breaking down.

I'd pay if you'd just know me. Seemed like the right thing at the time.

Levitate above all the messes made sit quiet by my side in the shade. And not the kind that's thrown, I mean The kind under where a tree has grown

it's all over, it's not meant to be. So I'll say words I don't believe

There's no morning glory, it was war, it wasn't fair. And we will never go back.

Had to do it this way 'Cause we were born to be the pawn In every lover's game

You say "what a mind" this happens all the Time

It's coming back around.

Break up, break free, break through, break down. You would break your back to make me break a smile

I think it's time to teach some lessons i made you my world. have you heard? I can reclaim the land.

I'm on my vigilante shit again.

But you were on somethin', It was one drink after another, Fuckin' politics and gender roles, And you're not sure and I don't know. Got swept away in the gray. I just may like to have a conversation

So I peered through a window, A deep portal, time travel, All the love we unravel. And the life I gave away

I'll run away

to hide that would be so dishonest. And it's fine to fake it 'til you make it. 'Til you do, 'til it's true

Pierced through the Heart but Never killed.

I feel you no matter what. The rubies that i gave up.

I find it dizzing they're bringing m'y History. But you weren't Even listening.

[appro880]

Our Democracy is Disappearing, Right Before Our Eyes...

The U.S. Supreme Court Ruled Last Week That, Donald Trump, Has Immunity From Prosecution for Official Acts, While in Office, Illegal or Otherwise…

The Vote Came Down with 6 Conservative Justices, 3 of Them, Trump Appointed, (Affirming). And 3 Dissenting (Opposing) Justices, (Liberal).

What This Effectively Means is That a President is Now Immune From Criminal Prosecution for Official Acts Committed While President. A President Can Order the Murder or Detention of Political Opponents, Can Arbitrarily, Eliminate Dozens of Government Agencies, Fire Thousands of Government Employees Who Are Not Loyal to His Administrative Policies and Agendas… Use the Military to Stop Opposing Protesters, Deport Thousands of Immigrants… Arrest Opposing Journalists and the Like… And This is What They Are Admitting to…Why Is This Beginning so Sound More and More Like a Dictatorship?

Moreover, The Former President Will Have No Other Civil or Criminal Trials Will Take Place, Prior to the November Election. The Court Has, Effectively Thrown a Huge Boulder in the Road to Bringing, Donald Trump, to Justice, with Regard to His Numerous Offenses.

The Ruling is Akin to, Forcing a Home Buyer or Car Purchaser to Sign a Contract, Without First Walking Through the Property or Test Driving the Vehicle. Furthermore, the Seller Takes No Legal Responsibility for Any Malfunction or Flaws in the Said Properties.

Who in Their Right Mind Would Willingly Participate in Such a Transaction? Yet, This is What We as the Citizenry Has Been Asked, No Told to Do.

Now the Lower Court Has to Hold a Series of Hearings to Determine Whether, Trump’s, Alleged Crimes Were Manifested Through Official Acts or Personal Acts. If Deemed, the Former; They Must Be Stripped From the Indictments.

Trump Has Already Told Us What He Plans to Do Once He is in Office... He Can Run for President, Be Elected President and Then Pardon Himself and All the January 6th, Rioters...

If Barack Obama, Had Committed 1/10th of Crimes of This One Man Crime Spree; What Do You Think Would Have Happened to Him? If You or Me Were a Convicted Felon, Do You Think a Corporation Would Hire Us or Allow Us On Their Board of Directors?

This Election is Truly About the Preservation of Our Democracy…

Start Paying Attention Folks! This is Only the Beginning...

The Long Held Tenet That: “No One is Above the Law”, is a Joke!!! Donald Trump and The SCOTUS Has Just Proved It

The Revolutionary War Was Fought, in Fact this Nation Was Supposedly, Created with the Intention of  Avoiding  the Possibility of Allowing a Tyrannical Leader (i.e., dictator, king, emperor) to Assume Power. We As a Nation, Have Long Held Our Democracy as a Shining Example For the Rest of the World to Follow, Yet We Are Now on the Brink of Having Our Own Now Crumble Before Our Very Eyes…

Ironically, The Alt Right and the Right Wing Evangelicals Are Using, Trump, to Further Their Agendas, While Trump is Using Them to Stay Out of Jail. The Rest of the Trumptards are Just Along for the Ride… And Ultimately, America, Itself Will Be Caught in the Crossfire…

It Is Up to You, and You, and You to Right These Wrongs, Before We Reach the Point of No Return…

You Must Vote on November 5th; Our Very Democracy and Way of Life Depends On It…

The Justice System, May Be a Joke, But "Project 2025" is No Joke! Look It Up!

[tortoiseguy]

So I've made a post about how the Hunter's Guild from Monster Hunter should be the series's antagonist that got a bit of traction. So I figured I'd write up a rundown of how this could look in a story for the mainline series.

So the setup is this:

In the past couple of years, the population of Monoblos have been slowly decreasing due to a mixture of poaching and over hunting due to their cultural significance as a right of passage for new hunters. They were rare before but not to the degree that entire generations of desert dwelling people have never seen one in the flesh. The Guild has thus far not addressed this rapid decline, and have made no plans to attempt at conserving them either. And every time someone comes forward with a proposal for a conservation effort it's declined with the excuse of limited resources, or lack of evidence, and even sometimes with no reasoning at all.

You the player, a new and upcoming hunter, are hired as an escort alongside a few other hunters to guide the cart of a passionate researcher couple to a nearby desert town. These two are researching the increasing decline of Monoblos and are gathering evidence to build a case for the guild to begin a conservation effort. They had heard of sightings of a large flying Wyvern with a crimson horn a few towns over and began their truck there.

On the way there, there's a boulder blocking the road. Upon going up to inspect it alongside one of the other hunters present you both note distinct scratch marks and massive horn shaped holes pierced into it. Immediately the researchers jump up and go to inspect themselves and then dart off in a direction to find more tracks. After following the for a bit you discover a small but healthy herd of Monoblos all living in this secluded and out of the way grassland. Immediately the researchers send for the guild to get funding for a conservation effort and, with no real argument against, it's accepted reluctantly. The funding is limited and very restrictive, but it's something! The Guild agrees to fund the conservation effort under the condition that there be a guild official present to supervise the operation and that if there's any violations of Guild guidelines, or accidents involving major property damage that it would be shut down.

And the the game would go one like a normal monster hunter game! You'd help around the village, hunt a few monsters to secure areas or get materials for tools all alongside the Hunter's and researchers you came here with. Every mission is this big victory and everyone's super excited at new discoveries. The guild official is being a real stick in the mud the whole game as is this one rich merchant in town who isn't super jazzed about these dirty hunters muddying up their vacation and closing one or two of their trade routes for their silly conservation effort.

But it's going really well! The groups learning all sorts of stuff and getting closer with one another and building this sort of found family thing. You learn at some point the herd is actually comprised pretty much entirely of females taking care of their young and begin searching for a nearby male to maybe keep track of. And you find one! A white Monoblos male! Heck! The guild official is even getting on board and being won over by all this infectious optimism!

And then something goes wrong. While on a quest to capture and get scent trackers onto the male Monoblos, it escapes the trap before you can use the tranq bombs and one of the hunters is gravely injured and you see it run into a few carts while fleeing away. Obviously the Guild official finds out and now there's this moment where you don't know what's going to happen. Throughout the entire story they're grumpy demeanor and pessimism had been slowly chipped away at to the point that they've become friends with the team and villagers. They've even grown attached to the Monoblos and is fully bought into saving them from extinction.

Will they tell the guild? Shut down the whole operation?

A day passes and nothing happens. Everyone's overjoyed! We can continue the conservation! You go out to run a quick errand and when you return there are guild knights everywhere. Funding is being pulled left and right, everything you've worked for is being confiscated or destroyed and their calling for this aggressive white monoblos' head. Everyone on the team is discharged and told to go back to the nearest guild city. You find out that the guild representative wasn't the one who actually told them and that they were actually fired. The culprit who informed the Guild was instead the grumpy rich merchant because the carts destroyed were theirs. They were still running their trade in secret and illegally.

The games sort of final quest would be an off the books repel quest where you, with the help of the now ex Guild worker, go behind the Guild's back to redirect the Monoblos away from the village before they have a chance to kill it.

The game could end a few ways. Like the guild learning of the merchant's illegal trading and arresting them and the conservation effort receiving the funding they need. Or it could end with the White Monoblos reuniting with the back and relocating away from civilization. Etc etc.

This is what I mean when I say they should antagonize the guild. I'm not asking for a grandiose story about the guild's corruption that paints us as the bad guys or paints hunting as this immoral thing that's solved by the end of the game. I just want small scale stories that play with the themes of environmentalism and colonialism that Monster Hunter has baked into its very core. I want character driven narratives that are about people and how they can achieve amazing things through cooperation.

And this is just one of them! They could do stories involving the tribe of Anjanath worshippers and mirror real life colonialism. They could do one where two central characters have completely different ideals about hunting and how that fractures their relationship. There are so many possibilities for multiple different games! You could even have recurring characters with arcs that span across multiple entries! Do it Capcom! Please!

[violetlunette]

Father of the Bride_Part 3

A Princess Bride AU

Part 1 / Part 2

Ao3 Version

Silver was kidnapped. That much was obvious. Less obvious was the reason why, at least at first. During his captivity, Silver was able to piece together that the two were hired to kidnap and frame the Sunset Savanna, far across the oceans, hoping that Malleus would start a war to save him. Silver was taken on a boat and sailed out to sea. Most of his time was spent locked up in the cargo hold. He was tossed down there after his first escape attempt, then bound after his fourth attempt, which nearly resulted in him being eaten by giant shrieking eels. When they docked on land, Silver was dragged and carried by animated puppet dolls, who had been his wardens the whole trip. Silver learned they were on loan from a powerful caster whom Fellow and Gidel—the fox and cat, respectively—worked for. “Well, I must say, I’m sad that I won’t be able to look at your pretty face anymore,” Honest Fellow hummed, tapping Silver’s cheek as the latter was dragged across the beach. “However, I am glad I won’t have to deal with your trouble making anymore.” “Mmff!” Silver’s response was muffled by the wad shoved in his mouth and the cloth over his lips. With a huff, Silver pulled his head away and glared at the conman, who grinned before walking away. “Now, where is Strom? He better not be late!” he called, spinning his black cane like a baton. As the other left, Silver turned his attention

to his bindings. He tugged at his arms, tightly secured behind his back, hoping his struggles had loosened them. “Nghmph…” Nope. Still tight and hindering his circulation. His legs? Silver attempted to pull them apart, then groaned. “Grmph.” ‘No luck. Darn it. I shouldn’t have given up on my physical training.’ Had he known self-defense, at the very least, Silver wouldn’t be in this mess. The teen glanced around and saw Gidel standing close to him, bouncing his hammer against a palm. He had a smirk on his lips that warned Silver not to try anything unless he wanted another bump to his head—which he had three of. Silver glowered at him. Little brat. “There you are!” At the bellow, Silver turned his head as much as he could. The lights of the lanterns the puppets held didn’t carry far, so at first, it was hard to see anything, though Silver heard the crunch of beach sand beneath the heavy thomps of footsteps. After a moment, a man stepped into the ring of light. “Ah, my dear Strom!” Fellow greeted. “It’s wonderful to see you.” Strom was a large man in every sense. It would be fair to say he resembled a boulder in the way he eclipsed the others. He was obviously a traveler who was in the sun quite often if his coarse, ruddy skin was any indication. That being said, he seemed to possess a comb, at least as his thick mane of hair was stylishly combed back and his beard was well-kept. “I’m sure it is,” the other said offhandedly. Strom's brown gaze immediately fell on Silver, looking him over like he was an object. The look made Silver tense. “So, this is the pretty bride?” Strom reached and gripped Silver’s face in a large hand, squishing his cheeks as the hand turned him to get a better look. His eyes were half-closed in approval. “Well, ain’t he a pretty doll?” he added with a grin that revealed all his teeth. Silver pulled away with a thick “Hmph!” through his nose, but this just seemed to amuse the other, who let out a burst of laughter. “My! That’s a fierce look on such a pretty face,” he said with a wink. "Shame, we have to--” His words stopped mid-sentence. His jolly face shifted into a deep scowl, his gaze sharp. He reached over and grabbed a surprised Fellow by the collar. “You weren’t supposed to be followed!” he growled, shaking the others. Fellow—with Gidel’s help—pulled away. “Please, that’s inconceivable!” he exclaimed, trying to straighten himself out. “No one can track our ship! We have thousands of spells to prevent that!” The large man sneered, curling his thick pink lips. “Oh? Then what’s that?” He pointed into the distance out to sea. Everyone turned.

--

Part 4

[rothjuje]

I don’t know what happened, but we’re becoming farm people. I just spent 20 minutes comparing different kids of manure.

Yesterday I saw that my favorite farm stand had opened for the season and I squealed and Justin was like why don’t I build you a fenced in garden and you just grow your own? A bit later I was talking about quail for their tiny adorable speckled eggs and getting a rabbit just to use its droppings in the garden and Justin asked “why are you talking about quail and a rabbit? Our next animals are goats.”

So that’s what we’re doing, living out our farm fantasy hahaha. Justin discovered that goats eat poison oak and that people pay big money to rent them out to eat excess vegetation and Justin is sold. I’m not ready for goats, seems like a big responsibility, but apparently sometime soon. And apparently their droppings are more beneficial than rabbit droppings, but so are chickens if you compost them right.

Why am I this way? What happened to me? Instagram? I had chickens in Texas and I loved my girls, but I wasn’t this level of obsessed with them. But now I see all these different breeds and characteristics and egg colors and I have become a chicken hoarder. I had to stop going to my favorite tractor supply because I became friends with the manager and he kept getting me to take his store’s injured birds home. So far we have rehomed 4 aggressive roosters (but kept our sweetheart silkie roo) and have 18 total. Three starlight eggers, three buff orpingtons, three mystic marans, two Easter eggers, two silkies, two booted bantams, a leghorn, a rhode island red, and a silver-laced sebright. We’ll get medium green eggs, light green eggs, maybe some blue if we’re lucky. And lighter brown, medium brown, and dark dark brown from the marans. And smaller cream colored ones from the bantam ladies. And the leghorn will lay the standard white you’re used to from the store, fun fact I hatched fertilized eggs from the store once and leghorns are what hatched!

I saw some reel that said that chickens are the gateway farm animal and ding ding ding. Once you have chickens you start looking up guard animals and then you want a goose. Then you go to a feed store and see that they have turkens (naked neck chickens that are social/sweet and are so ugly they’re cute), turkeys, ducks, and quails. I mean ducks are stinky and messy but I’ll take the rest please, thank you.

My grandma was an animal hoarder, is this genetic? She had an actual aviary and llamas and cats. We had animals growing up but I remember begging forever for a Guinea pig, it’s not like we had a farm. But at one point I was breeding Guinea pigs and fish. And incubating chicken eggs. So maybe it is in my genetics. A 10 year old asking for fish breeding supplies is not on my radar, what kid does that? Maybe this side of me has lied dormant under some depression fog. I don’t know.

Justin being on board is dangerous though. He didn’t even say anything when he came home from his work trip to 6 new chickens living in his office. He wasn’t as pleased about my “pointless” fish though, but I am loving my little aquarium. It’s next to my aerogarden and it’s such a happy little corner.

Anyway.

We need to push back the retaining wall in the backyard. Well *need* might be a little strong. But the wood panels are rotted out and need to be replaced. Right now it’s 2.5 high and the field of poison oak beyond is starting to travel down and I am so severely allergic my arms are constantly covered is weeping wounds. We’re going to push it back til it’s at 4 ft and then build the chicken run, originally it was supposed to be 10 by 8, but now I’m thinking it needs to be 12 by 8 minimum.

We’ve been chipping away at excavating ourselves but with between the kids, the boulders, and my rash reaction it’s just not worth it, we need someone with a machine so we hired someone to come excavate it next week. With the space, our backyard will eventually be dining area w pergola, chicken run/coop, fenced in garden area, swing set and jungle gym for the kids, goat shed/area, then Justin’s big shed that he hopes to break ground on this summer. When we’re done with that we’re going to build steps up to access our side yard, clear and level the clearing, and then put pavers or bricks down for a fire pit area.

I am absolutely obsessed with our property. I want to utilize as much of it as we can, and I never want to take for granted that we are lucky to have land and live somewhere breathtakingly beautiful. Life isn’t perfect by any means, but I still feel like I’m living the dream.

[domesticatedanimal]

FFXIVWrite2024

Prompt 5: Stamp

Mild violence

The Contract

The small party of adventurers knelt behind a jagged outcropping of coral-speckled rock. All four of them panted quietly, trying to catch their breath without letting the ragged gasps be too audible. Sif leaned out to peer down the tunnel ahead of them, counting out the pirates in her mind. The hilt of her sword dug into the blisters on her palms, and the weapon felt heavier than usual in her grip. She tugged absently at the leather strips of her hauberk with her other hand.

“How are we doing?”

“Bad,” replied the archer. He was a lanky Duskwight they’d met in town - unknown to the party but seemingly talented. Unfortunately, that early assessment had proven inaccurate. He was now little more than a liability, his bow cracked and his right arm torn to ribbons by one of the captain’s attack dogs. He now clutched a dagger in his off hand, which he had borrowed from their arcanist who had no use for it.

“Anyone else?”

Sif looked between the others - Decora Coramora, their accomplished arcanist, and a second new recruit, a Hyur thaumaturge hired from the guild. Both looked apprehensive, but Sif hoped she could count on them to continue. This contract would pay well. Perhaps enough to pull them all up out of the streets.

“The way forward is going to be shorter than the way back,” Decora offered with a shrug. Her tiny fingers flicked through the heavy tome in her hands, tracing words and symbols as they illuminated on the page. “I can stop this one’s bleeding long enough to survive, I think.”

The archer’s eyes widened. “You think? What do you mean you think?”

Sif turned her gaze back to the pirates in the tunnel ahead. They were still, but any movement forward would put the party directly in their line of sight. What are they waiting for? Sif wondered. They must have heard that fight.

She nodded toward Decora. “Do it, but be subtle. No light, if possible.” Decora chuckled under her breath.

“No light, she says. If only it worked that way.”

A green flash immediately caught the pirates’ attention, and Sif sighed as they shouted and rushed toward the party.

“Here we go, gang!”

Sif flung herself onto her feet and around the boulder in one movement, but prior exertion had left her unbalanced. She stumbled for a moment, her greatsword catching on the ground. Shit.

The pirates were on her in a second, ironed fists connecting with her stomach. She ducked as a second punch slipped past her face. With a roar, she leapt up, driving her shoulder into one of the attackers. It connected. Sif winced as teeth sunk into her shoulder but the pain was brief, and the pirate rocked backward before collapsing to the ground. With one threat temporarily removed, she resumed her assault on the other, lifting the sword and swinging it through the air. The blade’s edge found purchase in the pirate’s side, cutting through silk shirt and flesh alike.

Sif heard a cry from behind her as the first pirate lunged to attack. She couldn’t turn in time. Then, the air crackled and the tunnel burst into bright light as flames erupted from the pirate’s torso. She didn’t know the thaumaturge could cast that quickly. She lifted her sword to the burning pirate, and gave him mercy. The tunnel fell silent once more.

“Next time,” the thaumaturge whispered, in that quiet rasp they all seemed to share, “a bit of warning would be nice.”

---

Sif stepped out of the guild office, marked contract in hand. She admired the official stamp of the Admiral for a moment. Her first finished job for a proper city-state. Slipping between the bustling crowds of the Aftcastle, she made it back to their table, and dropped a heavy leather purse between her three companions. As she sat, Decora was already untying the pouch, pulling out handfuls of gil to count out amongst them. The pay wouldn’t be buying any of them homes, but a few nights in an inn, with a soft bed and warm blankets, would be a welcome reward.

[thedumbguywithaheart43]

A spark of hope story 1

Chapter 17 next day

1. It was early morning as Sparks walk down the stairs of the castle. He hadn't slept much. But apon seeing twilight Allready down stairs with a much better look was enough to sooth him.

2. He took a seat across the table from her. But now that he was closer he could see that the smile was fake. And there were bags under her eyes.

3"good morning Sparks we need to talk."the words caused him to take a deep gulp as she spoke."the assassin awoke an was interrogated over night. He doesn't know who sent him. He was hired anonymously."

4. Sparks slowly nodded and felt anger enter his heart. " So now what? " twilight sighed as sparks asked her this. " Its complicated for now ill be remaining here in ponyville an I am not to be left alone. Some of the girls are infact moving into the castle so at least thats taken care of."

5. Twilight then rubed a hoof against her forehead. " The bigger question is you. What are you?" Sparks huffed not really wanting to awnser the question. Still he had to. "A long time ago I had an...incident it changed me"

6. He held up a hoof witch sparked with small bits of electricity. " Since then ive been able to generate lighting an summon wild weather. The kind that Pegasi can't control." Twilight looked at her face now filled with curiosity.

7. "Beyond that I cant tell you much more. Only that it took years for me to get a handle over my a abilities most of witch I spent near the dragonlands." Twilight nodded in understanding. At least a few questions were awnsered.

8. Not much else was said between the two beyound a few questions about breakfast. Of witch sparks made simple toast for them both. After witch he headed back to the everfree to meet spike who had allready started his stretches.

9." Heya sparky." Spike smiled widely at his freind. "Hello spike are you ready for you next lesson?" Spike ran right up to him an stood tall.

10. Sparks couldn't help but smile. "Today we'll be discussing your fire." Spike raised an eyebrow. Confused he inquired about what sparks met. "My fire? Pretty sure we covered this ya know powered by gems."

11. Sparks rolled his eyes an chuckled." Yes thats true but your fire is very unique. Infact your one of very few dragons ive seen with magical fire." Spike thought about this for a moment.

12. He wasnt wrong spikes ability to send mail through his flames is fairly rare allthough he didn't know by how much. Sparks noticed spike in thought.

13. "Kiddo there are only two dragons currently able to use that ability. You an the current dragon lord." Spike eyes widened unsure of how to respond. Sparks smiled an patted him on his shoulder. "You seemed surprised. Magic is considered a lost art for dragon kind only the scepter the dragon lords carries the knowledge of old. Luckily for you i guess your egg must've been exposed to a large bit of magic."

14. Spike nodded slowly. " yeah twilight hatched me in her exam witch lead her to become Celestias student." Sparks raised an eyebrow surprised. He had figured spike was found as a hatchling but he didn't expect him to been hatched by a pony. "Huh well ok now you know...ah right uh also for someone your size your fire output is pretty strong but in a fight you gotta make it last."

15. Spike nodded again now getting excited for his new training. "Today you'll be practicing on controlling your own flame." Sparks pointed to a large stone. "I want you to melt that rock."

16 spike looked at the boulder it was fairly big an he wasn't exactly sure he could do as sparks said. Still he knew sparks knew his stuff an he did as he asked breathing out a steady flame for about 10 seconds before needing to breathe.

17. The rock was unfazed with only some scotch marks. "Hmm impressive most dragons your age would've stopped at 6 seconds. Good job." Spike smiled happily at sparks. " now focus breathe in through your noise let the air hold for a few seconds then breathe out slowly. "

18. Sparks then demonstrated as he breathe out a little bit of lightning form around him. Spike was in awe. He had noticed during there time together that the weather would change depending on his mood. Spike had assumed he had some sort of magic but he didn't wish to pry.

19. Spike then started to try what sparks had taught him. He as he did blame exited from his snout. Sparks watch with approve. ' hes doing well. Perhaps you should teach for a living' it was the mare again.

20.He closed his eyes attempting to block the thoughts from his mind. ' not this time we need to talk rammer. Tonight ' He sighed quietly. "Thats enough for today spike I need to deal with something. " spike looked to his freind suprised. "Oh ok uh we gonna head back?."

21.Sparks nodded as he started to walk with spike in tow. Tonight was going to be interesting.