#now her mental breakdown will be about ai

[aihoshiino]

chapter 165 thoughts

Aqua Hoshigan Status: It's Officially Hoshinover

Chapters Until The Story Ends Without The 143 Kiss Being Addressed Or Acknowledged: 1

damn i guess they really did just kill his ass

I'm gonna be so real with you gamers, I kind of don't have a lot to say about this one either lol. Which I acknowledge sounds completely wild given the Everything that happens in it, but most of my meat and potatoes analysis in these reviews comes from breaking down characterization and we're flying through everything at such breakneck pace that we're barely getting any characterization.

It continues to drive me bugfuck insane that Ai is completely absent from this finale despite the importance of 15 Year Lie. Its imagery is plastered all over but whenever we return to it, we just see Aqua. Not only that, but Gotanda is the one who insists on pushing the movie through for Aqua. 15YL as a story about Ai's true self and her tragedy is now officially taking a backseat to being about Aqua's tragic death and legacy. It was already bad enough that we spent so much time in the Movie Arc not actually focusing on Ai to the extent that, as everyone pointed out, based on what we saw on-page it was basically a Sad Kamiki Movie, but this really is just pissing right in the wound at this point lmao.

The funeral scene also serves as the final nail in the coffin for any Secretly Alive Aqua copes, which is kind of a relief. I still don't like how Aqua's death played out, but I think dragging it out for four chapters then going "sorry you thought i was /srs when i was just /jk" would have been infinitely more insulting. I don't like this ending, but I can respect that Akasaka seems to be sticking to his guns on it, even if we still do have like a whole chapter left for him to whip around and go "I WAS /JK ALL ALONG!!!!" but I don't see it happening.

Anyway, yeah! The funeral! Uh. Is it gonna sound weird if I say I felt kind of like… grossed out reading this the first time? Like, I really don't know how else to explain the visceral "why the fuck is the author making me read this" reaction I had to it. I think it's just because Kana is so fucking distraught here and the drama is just so hammy and so over the top that it feels kind of… ech. I dunno. I just really didn't vibe.

It doesn't help that this is part of a much broader pattern in the back half of OnK of Aka getting us right up close into the gory details of a character's complete mental breakdown and suffering and then spend zero time or focus on their recovery. This happened with Ruby all over the Movie Arc and this many times and with this little runway to the end of the series, it just starts to feel exploitative, like a way to cheaply pull at our heartstrings without doing the work to build everyone back up after tearing them down.

also pre-emptively dreading all the fuel this is going to add to the fires of People Who Are Weird And Misogynistic About Kana but she could die saving innocent children from a burning building and people would find reasons to be shitty about her lmao

we really are not seeing ruby's reaction to finding out her brother was dead huh lol

I will say the one thing I didn't Actively Dislike about this chapter was Ruby, though. I was honestly starting to get pretty skeeved out with how many people were gleefully predicting or actively wishing for her immediate suicide purely for ship motivated reasons and I was also worrying that the story was going to pretend that Ruby doesn't like. Have a life and support system outside of Aqua. Yes, she should absolutely be affected by his death but this period of her shutting down only to drag herself back onto her feet that we seem to be getting feels way more in line with pre-Movie Arc flanderization Ruby and I'll take that W where I can get it.

god. I haven't even talked about Kamiki's supposed serial killer cult. I just don't have the strength. Like… that's self-evidently stupid, right? I don't need to explain to you why that's ridiculous and unbelievable? You don't need me to tell you why it's fucking crazy that we're getting this information about the alleged overarching antagonist of the series not only in the second-to-last chapter of the entire series but after he was already dead, right? We can just move on? Ok good. jesus christ.

FINAL CHAPTER NEXT WEEK…

[kumzorg]

my older teto design redraw ^_^

[spotaus]

Thinking about Orchid and her connection to my take on Gender (because this was meant to be about her and the Crew but it just devolved into a character analysis kinda??? More trauma-dumping maybe???) This is very much an oc/personal rant so feel free to ignore it 🫡

So, Orchid started off as a character I didn't really think much of (hear me out this is going to be relevant) because I wanted to add a 'girl' character but didn't know what to *do* with her, y'know? She was always going to be the strongest one there, she had the odds stacked in her favor with her parents. She was always going to be the gloomy side-character to match Reset's energy. But I think she's gone through every stage of Generic Woman I could possibly find.

At first she was angry and abrasive (think Fell!Sans) where every other word was a curse and she was likely to throw the first punch then laugh as she kicks her enemy while they're down. This was when Reset was a cartoonishly self-centered villain whose goal was simply to prove others wrong. Then Orchid became a sort of sisterly figure. This was short-lived, but she was the one comforting people who Reset would torment, but would ultimately follow his orders, because at this point he was actually a danger and sadistic. And then there was the phase where the story mellowed out and she became the token Goth Girl who, yes she was strong, but was heavy on the 'whatever' energy. Then there was her Era of deep self-loathing and anxiety about her worth that held her back and made her a much more timid and meek character who would only lash out on occasion.

Now, Orchid is the best of those iterations I've written yet. She's calm, level-headed, and a natural leader. Her father raised those traits into her. But she's very reactive, and can be silly, and when she's comfortable it's likely that air of importance transforms into something more comfortable and familiar. She laughs loudly and grins wide, she likes loud video-games but loves to read in the quiet. She's extremely disciplined, and normally no one can get through her tough exterior besides her best friend, Reset. She does what she does for her own enjoyment, sure, but she's thought of every angle and makes her choice to help Reset and control the others with her whole chest. She still worries she won't live up to her invisible expectations, and that and her loyalty are her two driving forces.

I know that Orchid is important to me because she's the longest-running female oc I've had. I have a rough relationship with womanhood/girlhood and I know looking back that Orchid recieved every ounce of my distaste for being a woman that I could shovel into her. That never made her less of a character, she was actually always one of my favorites, and rarely was she a 'punching bag oc'. I just... projected onto her a lot. And she's a good sign of how I've learned who I am. I've decided that my own femininity is something I could live without. I'd rather not associate myself with it, and I'd like to leave it in my past, focusing on a future where I'm not tied down with any gender roles or expectations. That won't happen, but I've come to terms with it myself. Orchid though? I figured out through her that I don't have to hate women characters. My own distaste for my circumstances doesn't mean I have to push it onto my characters (on God I've never expressed anything rude to actual people, that'd be rude as hell and uncalled for, but I have a bad habit of disliking fictional women in media). So, Orchid is a well-roubded character finally. She has motivations abd goals and a *lot* more depth than I ever expected her to. She's happy with being a woman, she's content. She's not treated differently for it in unfair ways by those she cares about, so she doesn't mind it. She likes to wear pretty outfits and lets Reset add bows to her ribbons. She doesn't let being a woman hold her back in the slightest.

So, yeah. Orchid is one of my babies. If I ever leave this Fandom behind for good, she's one that's coming with (Ichor, Orchid, and Pretender all have human designs I can use elsewhere lol-) but in the meantime I'll just rotate her around in my brain for a while longer.

If I'm right, she's been with me for nearly 5-6 years and I went through a *lot* with her as an outlet. So, she's kinda just like an old stuffed animal. A lil ripped, matted fur, maybe a stain or two, but there's a story there and that makes it important beyond belief.

[justalittledumb]

What about yandere self-aware Lumine and Stelle who try to get you to play their respective games?

Hiya! I wasn't entirely sure if you wanted a scenario with both of them at once or seperate ones for both. I decided to do one where both of them want you to Play their game over the other ones, but if that's not what you wanted feel free to tell me.

⭐ Let's start off by saying in what way they are similiar to each other. Both of them became obsessed with you for a simple reason, you are real.

💫 It's hard to say what caused Lumine to become self-aware. Perhaps It was faulty programing, maybe a glitch on your side?

💫 Once she did became self aware tho... her first reaction was to cry... or at least try to. Her entire life, her world, her friends and even her brother were nothing but lines of code made to give people gambling addiction.

💫 But while in her depressed state she noticed something... a warm, soothing feeling suddenly embraced her. It was you, at the time she didn't know what exactly was happening, but she knew it was enjoyable and calming.

💫 Later she learned more about you, that you were a player that was having fun with her world. She started to memorise your schedule, waiting in anticipation for your next "visit" as she started to call call them.

💫 But one Day, you haven't showed up... and then the next and the next. Disstressed, Lumine checked your activity... and find out something horrifying... you were playing a diffrent game.

🌟 Stelle's "awakening" let's call it, was a lot like Lumine's. With one tiny diffrence, she got WAY more attached to you. (That is not to say that Lumine didn't get attached)

🌟 She Would practicaly have a mental breakdown whenever you stopped playing, it isn't a pretty sight...

🌟 So when one Day you haven't logged into the game... she wasted no time in checking your devices activity to see if you were "cheating" on her... after seeing you'v Been playing diffrent game, only one thing was able to get out of her mouth. "What the hell is Genshin Impact?"

⭐ Now, both of the Girls would have similiar way of making you favor their game above their competetor's, that is manipulating game mechanics in your favor, they would go about it in slightly diffrent ways.

💫 Lumine would be more subtle, Givng you better crit rates, making sure you only get Commision that she noticed you enjoyed and slightly increasing the amount of Primogems you were given.

🌟 Stelle on the other hand... oh boy. She wouldn't be subtle, like at all. All 10 pulls that you did would result in you getting multiple 5 star characters. The enemy AI seemed to sometimes just glitch, making the game a little too easy. And one Day you would wake up to your account having thousands star rail passes. It made you think your account was glitched or something.

⭐ Oh and believe me, if they managed to contact each other in some way, all the time they didn't spend with you, they would spend arguing about you. It's almost comical.

⭐ Overall tho the situation Wouldn't be too pleasant for either of the girls... At least you were getting free stuff in-game, and who doesn't like that?

Hiya! I Hope that you enjoyed this! I'm sorry if it wasn't the type of thing you were looking for :(.

Like always i'm open to criticism.

[stanheightsimp]

This sick strange darkness | Adam Stanheight x GN(afab)!Reader (NSFW)

Sitting on the balcony and watching the rain fall with Adam | 2545 words

(this is an AI-generated image, to illustrate what I had in mind)

I cannot sleep I cannot dream tonight I need somebody and always This sick strange darkness Comes creeping on so haunting every time - I Miss You, Blink 182

🪚 Content Warning : NSFW smut, vaginal sex, creampie, unprotected sex, spit kink

MINORS DNI

You're an urbexer living in Jersey City. Two months ago, a young man about your age, Adam Stanheight, disappeared. You were particularly affected, because he was your age. He could have been one of your friends, or even you. You'd often, if not every day, seen a sad-faced woman pasting missing person posters on the gray walls of Jersey. On several occasions, you went to her aid. She was Adam's mother. She often talked to you about him, about how, despite appearances, he was a good boy, passionate about photography, rock music and animals. Despite the fact that you helped this woman with all the determination you could muster, you were certain that Adam was gone for good. And that made you sad.

Despite the worrying climate of disappearances in town, this didn't stop you from doing your usual urbex. While exploring an abandoned house, "a great spot" according to your buddy who'd put you onto it, you found Adam. He was chained to a wall in a squalid bathroom, having not eaten for… days, weeks, perhaps? You still had one of his missing person posters in the back pocket of your jeans. Reassuring him as best you could (which wasn't easy), you called for help, and Adam was released.

Adam spent several days in hospital, before he was able to return home. But as soon as he stepped out of his shithole of an apartment, he felt very, very bad. Partly because it was the apartment in which he'd been captured. And secondly, because after spending several weeks alone, in complete darkness, he had a very, very hard time with solitude.

You were the first person he thought to call. Because you found him. Because you'd seen him at his worst, clinging to your leg, begging you not to leave him behind, as you were just about to leave for the front door to greet the paramedics.

You ended up sleeping at his place more often than you slept at yours, even finding his old sofa a pleasant place to sleep.

That evening, it was a stormy night. You couldn't get to sleep, listening to the sound of rain beating against the window and thunder rumbling in the distance. You didn't hear Adam's little footsteps approaching. He was curled up in his blanket, staring blankly at an invisible spot on the grimy living-room wall.

Hey, you you said. You okay?

He lowered his eyes and shook his head, before coming to sit on the sofa beside you.

Easy, Adam, breathe, you said, feeling the explosion near.

You'd learned to recognize the warning signs of Adam's mental breakdown. So you pulled him against you.

Another nightmare, eh? you guessed.

He gave you no response other than a slight nod, and a whispered sorry as he buried his face in your shoulder. You proceeded to rub the back of his hand with the palm of your hand, repeating comforting words in a low voice:

You're here with me, Adam, you're not in that squalid bathroom anymore. You're all right now. I won't let anyone hurt you, I'm here, Adam.

Outside, the storm was raging. Adam hiccupped, before starting to sob softly against your shoulder.

Adam, breathe, you whispered in his ear. Remember what we said. It's all right, Adam. Everything's all right.

He nodded weakly. Suddenly, an idea crossed your mind.

How about a smoke on the balcony? We'd be out of the rain and we could watch the rain fall. What do you say?

He raised his head and sniffed.

Yeah, I could use a cigarette.

You got up at the same time, Adam still wrapped in his blanket, he grabbed the pack of cigarettes from his coffee table, and you went out onto his balcony. The cold was biting, and you shivered.

As you both sat on the balcony, backs against the wall, Adam spread the flaps of his blanket so that you were both wrapped up in it, like a cocoon. His body was warm, you couldn't help but notice.

It feels good, he confided. You know, to be outside. It'd be better if it was somewhere else than in a place that's crap.

He pulled a cigarette from his pack, and proceeded to light it. And that's when, for the first time, you saw Adam. Of course you'd looked at him many times before, but now it pierced you. He was beautiful, painfully beautiful. Under the light of the moon, the flashes of lightning and the artificial illumination of the street lamps, the angular shape of his face was highlighted. So were his long, slender fingers encircling his cigarette.

He then handed you the pack of cigarettes, offering you one, which you declined:

I don't fancy a whole cigarette. Maybe I could have a few puffs on yours?

Yeah, no worries, he replied.

As he brought his cigarette close to your lips, allowing you to take a few puffs, he asked:

You know what's strange?

You brought your face close to his hand, took a drag on his cigarette, tilted your head back as you exhaled the smoke skyward.

Tell me, Adam?

Knowing that I could have died and no one would have cared. Not a single person in the world.

Your parents cared! you corrected him. Your mother put out missing person poster every day! And then… I cared.

That's what I don't get! he exclaimed. Why did you even care? Do you know how many people disappear every day? People who probably had a better life than me and a better chance of being found. People who deserved to be found!

His depreciation of himself, so sudden, so angry, brought tears to your eyes.

Because your mother told me about you! You're not the boy with the best life, but you're someone like me. Someone who does his best. Someone who's trying to keep his head above water in this rotten world. Someone who's imperfect, but who's human, sincere! you cried, your voice breaking.

Your gaze slid over him, and you whispered:

You're wonderful, Adam.

He flinched slightly when you raised your voice, and his gaze locked with yours, glistening with tears. A deathly silence now reverberated, interrupted only by the rain pounding on the roof and the thunder. His breathing seemed to freeze in his chest. So you did the only thing that made sense to you at the time. You took the cigarette that hung between his lips, half-open in surprise, placed it in the ashtray and then put your lips to his.

The first thing that popped into your mind as your lips finally met was the taste. They tasted of tobacco and mint toothpaste. Adam tastes warm. He tastes alive. His lips parted, allowing full access to his mouth, and your tongues intertwined. Who knew his tongue was so soft?

You deepened the kiss, coming straddling him, growling with pleasure as the kiss continued, Adam placing his hands on your cheeks. His teeth nibbled lightly on your bottom lip.

Adam… we… we should go inside, you said, your tone unequivocal about what's going to happen once you're inside.

Inside… he repeated. Yeah, good idea.

His lips were still touching yours, even if it had amounted to a gentle caress, his breath all against your skin. His hands slid down to your hips, and Adam let out a muffled growl before beginning to nibble your earlobe. Almost instinctively, your pelvis pressed against Adam's, and your hands went under his shirt, caressing his slim torso.

In one motion, you both stood up and walked back into the apartment, still kissing. Adam tackled you to the wall, devouring your lips with an avidity you didn't suspect, his whole body pressed against yours.

Fuck, Adam, I want you…

Yeah, I want you too, YN, he replied, breathing heavily, all against your lips.

With erratic movements and fingers trembling with desire, you started to unbutton Adam's pants, before giving up and attacking his t-shirt instead. Adam, raising his arms, let himself be undressed. You dropped his T-shirt to the floor, then ran your hands over his torso. He was really skinny; his captivity had left scars he hadn't yet healed. On his right shoulder, the bullet hole was still visible. He slid your pants down your hips, and his hand came to rest against your crotch, through your underwear. He smiled, his middle finger brushing against your already moist intimacy.

So wet for me, he said with a sneer, nibbling your lower lip.

Shut up, Stanheight, you replied, the end of your sentence choking in your throat as, through the fabric, you felt his finger sink viciously into your folds.

Hm? he said lightly, his lips sliding against your neck. You say?

Still groping, you made your way through the apartment to Adam's bedroom. You dropped onto the bed, Adam removing his jeans and rushing over to you with a hungry glint in his eye to remove your tshirt. Then, delicately, he grabbed your hand, slipping it between his legs. Through his underwear, your fingers wrapped around his cock and he let out the most glorious moan you've ever heard.

Take off my underwear, Adam, make me fucking naked, you moaned.

He made no bones about taking it off you, then taking off his own, sitting on the bed for a moment to see the mess you'd both become. Both completely undressed, both excited, both sweating and trembling with anticipation.

I want to do things to you, he says, his breathing shaking with excitement.

You pulled him against you again, naked body against naked body, eager to taste every inch of his skin. You kissed him full on the lips, savoring the taste of mint and tobacco, something new and yet so familiar. When you broke the kiss, a thin trickle of saliva connected your lips.

I want you to do things to me, I want you to ravage me, you said breathlessly, your mouth sliding down his neck to leave hickeys, as your fingers titillated his nipples.

Adam hiccupped with desire, his breath catching in his chest. His hand slid down your back, bringing your bodies together. He let his lips roam to your chest, kissing, biting and suckling your nipples with almost sloppy impatience. It was almost too overwhelming, almost too good.

You're incredible, you gasped.

He grabbed your hair, gently tipping your head back, and proceeded to devour your neck with ever so much ardor, while with his other hand, his fingers moved in and out of you

Adam… fuck me, you said, eager to have something other than his fingers inside you. You want it as much as I do, and I know it.

You proceeded to suck on his right nipple, tasting the salty, moist flavor of his skin. Adam let out another moan, more desperate than ever, and, moving his hips against yours, began to thrust delicately inside you. His forehead was pressed against yours, your panting breaths almost synchronizing. When he was fully inside you, everything seemed to stop. You stood still, as if suddenly aware of some kind of sacredness in the act. And also, let's be honest, that if you started to get wild already, you'd both cum very quickly.

Your hand grazed Adam's cheek and you got lost in his eyes. He gently began to initiate a movement, slow, ample. His fingers clutched at his sheets, nervously.

Your bodies were like two pieces of a puzzle. Don't think about the puzzle now, you are mumbling to yourself. Think only of Adam. You drew his face against yours, kissing him, and giving him tacit agreement to pick up the pace, which he did, kissing you almost desperately at the same time. Your nails dug into his back, probably leaving a few marks.

It's so, so huge, you whispered in his ear. You fill me up so good, baby.

In response, he grabbed your legs, and pushed them against your shoulders, sinking deeper into you. Your cry of surprise and pleasure echoed throughout the room. You opened your mouth, eager for sensation, but above all, eager for him.

Spit in my mouth, Adam.

Surprise flashed across his eyes for a moment, then, still pounding you mercilessly, he leaned forward, dripping a fine trickle of saliva into your mouth. Adam's taste invaded all your taste buds. He abruptly let go of your legs to place one of his hands on your cheek, kissing you passionately. A kiss filled with an almost indecent desire. Like, he'd just spit in your mouth in such a dirty way, and now he was taking you wildly.

Adam, I… you started, trying to hold back the climax that threatened to come. I love you! I love you!

Oh my God, I love you so much… he replied in a hoarse voice.

He kissed you almost brutally, almost as if he couldn't control himself anymore, as the rhythm of his hips increased at an indecent rate.

Then… orgasm reaps you. Just after he tells you he loves you, you cum, screaming his name so loudly that, if they didn't already, the neighbors must know his name by now.

Come inside me, you managed to articulate. Come inside me, I want to feel you.

I'm not wearing any... he began, hesitantly.

I don't give a shit about condoms, you replied, almost desperately, wrapping your legs around his pelvis. Come on, I want to see my beautiful boy cum in my little pussy.

Oh fuck… he murmured, burying his face in your neck.

You felt him spread inside you, and his hip movements continued for a while longer, before he came to rest, lying on top of you, his face still against your neck, his breathing short and choppy.

It was… he started.

Yeah. It was. you replied, stroking his hair.

He withdrew gently, and you felt all the cum he'd injected flowing out of you.

Oops! he said, chuckling lightly. Don't move, I'll get you something to wipe with.

He disappeared into the corridor for a moment and returned with a damp washcloth, which he ran gently over your crotch before caressing your cheek, looking at you with a look that expressed nothing but pure love.

I suppose now that we're… you begin, before interrupting yourself.

Maybe, after all, what you'd just done didn't have the same meaning for you as it did for Adam? Maybe it was just comfort sex in his eyes. He looked at you, tilting his head slightly to one side. Then the reasons for your hesitation became clear to him, and he gently kissed your forehead, before coming to nestle beside you:

Yes, we're together, and yes, you can sleep here. I promise you that by tomorrow, I won't regret anything I've done or said tonight, he said in a gentle voice.

You purred and snuggled up to him.

Outside, the rain had stopped. And deep down you knew it: this was the first night of a long series of nights at Adam's side.

[a-really-big-cat]

After reading 123, I'm surprised (or maybe not) that people miss the point of the chapter. It's pretty much revealing what was Aqua doing from 105 till now: his mission to make everyone hate him so no one miss him when he's gone. When Ruby hated him, he was fine with it. When he met Akane in 106, it wasn't because he was unconsciously asking for help, but instead provoking her to hate him. When he laughed in 117, it wasn't because he manipulated Kana (he still hasn't) but instead because he thought everything was going too easy and had it in the bag, but now in 122-123 he finally had the moment of truth of manipulating Ruby, but he couldn't. He had to go against his own plan and reveal the truth because Ruby was getting too involved in the revenge plan without his control (something similar to Akane that led to the break up). Crow loli said it was a bad move because it made him notice that he didn't manage to drop his naivety at all. But then there's also Ruby. With this chapter we have confirmation that Ruby is maybe the most mentally unstable character of the main cast: she was a happy girl trying to carry on Ai's legacy while also wanting to meet Goro. Once she found out Goro was dead, she went on a mental breakdown and her whole personality changed. When Aqua revealed Ai's secret, her personality once again did a switch and wiped all the good memories she had about Aqua. When she saw her mother happy with a new family, her personality flipped once again making her hate everyone, and when Aqua revealed that he was Goro, her personality once again flipped, now being happy with him and memoryholing everything that happened till that moment. This is the second part of the bad move that Crow loli said: Ruby is too mentally unstable and uncontrollable, her current state will lead to the complete opposite that Aqua wants for both the movie and her future. But of course, shitposting about incest is more engaging.

Wow ok this random commenter seems to be on point with the literary analysis

[brf-rumortrackinganon]

A Roundup of the Kate Conspiracy Theories from Twitter

So you don't have to go down the rabbit hole. Some of them are dark; I'll put those at the end below the cut so anyone who wants to scroll away can scroll away.

(My favorites in bold)

She had a BBL (Brazilian Butt Lift).

She's Banksy.

Botched cosmetic procedure, needed urgent fixing.

William cheated with Rose again and she left him, taking the kids with her.

Hysterectomy + tummy tuck = botched.

Bad haircut/dye job.

Kept a pregnancy secret, delivered by c-section.

Diana's revenge

William lost his temper and beat her so badly that they're keeping her hidden till the bruises/broken bones are healed.

William kicked her out because he doesn't want her to be Queen.

Divorce of the Wales Part Two because William cheated

Bottom surgery

Kate grew a conscience so they had to kill her and are now replacing her brain with AI.

Shelly Miscavige'd

She abandoned and fled to a tropical beach.

She quit the royal family and is touring Britain in a converted transit van, selling dreamcatchers made from her own hair on Etsy to make ends meet.

Kate donated a kidney to Charles in return for becoming Queen soon.

Boob job

She went through a cosmic wormhole and left the Milky Way Galaxy.

Female 007

She's the one with cancer, Charles is faking it so everyone leaves her alone.

Took the kids and moved to Scotland

Growing out bad bangs

Meghan's karmic revenge

They're building a robot clone of her so she doesn't have to work anymore.

Trying to reach the end of YouTube shorts

Coma from botched surgery

The press knows but are under a gag order/injunction and can't report

She was never in the hospital.

William threw something at her, it hit her in the face, needs corrective surgery

Complications from pregnancy and on bed rest

Cholecystectomy/gall bladder surgery

Spontaneously combusted

Tragic accident a la Diana, better cover-up this time.

Charles actually died, it's just an actor walking around until the Waleses are ready to take the throne officially.

Botched BBL using her own stomach fat.

Rehab for alcoholism

Being reprogrammed to accept mistresses

She's playing Celebrity Big Brother

IVF transfer and first trimester HG recovery

Banished/handled by Camilla

Facelift

Bad botox/filler, waiting for it to dissolve

Put out to pasture by the royal family because she's finished having children.

Abducted by aliens

William didn't want to start his reign married to someone he hated, so he left her and is forcing a divorce.

She ran away to Italy

Argument over where George would go to school, William made it physical, she tried to leave

She's in the Princess Protection Program

At Chili's chugging margaritas

Binged too much at Christmas, now trying to lose weight

She wandered off during the Glasgow Willy Wonka Experience and is stuck to the ceiling after drinking the fizzy lifting drink and they can't get her down.

Smuggled to America

Mental breakdown from William's cheating

Inpatient treatment for eating disorder

Complicated miscarriage

CPTSD breakdown (complex post-traumatic stress)

All the people that Twitter suggested we need to call to investigate Kate's whereabouts:

Sherlock Holmes (Benedict Cumberbatch edition)

Scully and Mulder (X Files)

Captain Olivia Benson (L&O:SVU)

Charlie from It's Always Sunny

Nanny Jo Frost

Steve and Blue (Blue's Clues)

Sergent Catherine Cawood (Happy Valley)

Rustin Chole (Matthew McConaughey from True Detective)

Harriet the Spy

Luther (Idris Elba edition)

Trevor Rainbolt

Jaz Singh (British Traitors edition)

One final reminder: The really dark theories about Kate are below the cut here.

William went into a drunk alcoholic rage and killed her.

Staph infection/sepsis from the trampoline injury that caused paralysis/amputation

Family annihilation by William

Severely injured in shooting accident at Sandringham shortly after Christmas when an ambulance was rushed to hospital from the royal estate.

Suicide attempt and mental health treatment

William beat her into a coma

[choppedcowboydinosaur]

A few weeks ago I delved into this rabbit hole of watching videos about the In Praise of Shadows hit piece on Wendigoon. Now mind you I don't watch either of these people's content but here's what I noticed during this whole drama.

For In Praise of Shadows I noticed the following (Note for the rest of this post I will refer to In praise of shadows as IPOS because it's easier for me to type.):

He wants ideological purity for horror movies. He doesn't think any conservatives should be allowed in horror. He thinks horror is inherently leftist. Which is odd since you could make the argument 80's slasher films have a conservative bent to them. Were all debauchery is punished by the slasher villain and only the final girl survives by being pure. Also, he accuses Late Night with the Devil of being a conservative movie because some of the transition cards use AI. That is odd to me since if you are going to call that movie conservative it should be by analyzing its themes rather than accusing it of AI. It just makes him seem like a very fragile person.

Most of his accusations are just guilt by association and lying about the youtubers he's complaining about. He accuses a bunch of people I've never heard of being gun crazed guntubers. None of these youtubers are guntubers. He also shits on Mutahara and Shoeonhead for no legitimate reason. I stopped watching Shoeonhead a while ago and distrust her somewhat but even I thought that accusation of her being conservative was completely disingenuous.

He accuses Internet Historian of being a neo-nazi because his birthday being 4/20 which is apparently Hitler's birthday. This stood out to me since you'd think for someone as terminally online as him, he would know what the 4/20 meme is.

He often associates guns with right wing despite there are leftists who use guns. Again, it's a very twitter mentality he has.

He bitches about Wendigoon being supposedly rich. I don't know how true this is, but I am starting to doubt IPOS claims of poverty given his pretentious manners. That and all he cares about is making video essays.

Also, he is whiny about not making enough youtube money and having to walk in a parking lot to a horror convention in North Carolina. To be fair he might have been saying this on behalf of handicap people, but they have handicap stalls for a reason. Also, if you aren't making enough youtube money there's this thing called getting a job. Especially, a part time one which allows for a more flexible schedule for him to make videos. Again, this man is very whiny.

He sounds like a pretentious version of Morakiu. He speaks in a monotone voice with no inflection in his voice. At least Morakiu was funny.

He has twitter brainrot. I say twitter brainrot because specifically he thinks all of Appalachia is white racists. Say what you will about this site many here would have called him out on that. For the record Appalachians are not inherently racist.

He associates aloha shirts with the boogalooo boys/alt-right. He said this while wearing an aloha shirt himself. Now that might be him being ironic but his stupidity cancels it out. Now while the boogaloo boys love their aloha shirts it is not explicitly a right-wing thing. I am a local from Hawaii and many of us here wear aloha shirts regularly so it's not some alt-right thing. I hate how people have now associated something innocent with that. Aloha shirts existed long before the alt-right ever came into existence.

He has this schizo moment where he thinks Wendigoon was trying to harass him by following him on twitter. When it turns out Wendigoon followed him because he liked his Slenderman video.

Pretty much the whole internet pushed his shit in after he spouted all that nonsense. He is a living case of a terminally online leftist with twitter brainrot. On one hand this man was clearly going through a mental breakdown, is delusional and should touch grass/seek therapy. On the other hand, he is a spiteful miscreant who likes to tarnish other people so my sympathy for him is very limited. It's good everyone rejected his ass because I feel like if he did this shit in 2017, he might have gotten away with it given how crazy everyone was driven with the TDS.

Now onto Wendigoon. Despite all this slander Wendigoon forgives IPOS. To me this shows he is legitimate in his kindness and beliefs. Since he was forgiving to someone who did not give him any courtesy at all. Which is doubly ironic since IPOS hates when people slander him, but he is fine with slandering other people. It's like I'm looking at two people diverging form a forked road. One chose the path to hurt people because he was hurt. The other chose the path to help people because he was hurt and doesn't want anyone to suffer. He's honestly far more merciful than I would have been in that situation. The thing was bizarre overall. Hopefully, after seeing IPOS madness people will calm down and not try to cancel each other. Unlikely but hopefully that reckoning will come and people go back to normal.

[yuseirra]

This is so weird!!?? This is so weird?? Fatal keeps giving me this imagery, the melody of the song itself too. I may be repeating the same idea over and over but I'm so convinced on this, hear me out, That song is literally portraying the mind of a person being driven into insanity, with it's.. ominous and confusing aura all over it, it doesn't seem natural, what Kamiki's went through. I really feel like something's driven him into insanity. I'm not really in denial or anything, but I just find it so confusing and hard to understand because what he is now is WAY FAR PAST how his usual breakdown would have been. It just makes sense if this is the case because he IS the guy Ai's wanted to save. and the songs don't feel... it's really only him that's brought him to be this way, this is a person who gets easily influenced. This is so bizarre. Does anyone feel this way when you listen to those songs? Mephisto's core emotion is longing and sorrow but the lyrics start turning a bit weird in the end with a strange conclusion that the speaker wants to become the one they long (this can be just an expression of determination depending on the context but if you look at what Kamiki's done??? I think he LITERALLY wanted to become like her by increasing his weight of life whatever the heck that is) and Fatal, well, that song has a vibe of desperation and something really, really omnious. I'd say that this reminds me of that one panel from 140 when his eyes started becoming black with this weird.. flow pouring all over it, it's a song of corruption, he's totally become corrupted. Why are the songs like this??

If the timeline goes Mephisto -> Fatal in that order, it would perfectly portray how this guy's mind shattered apart. He's been growing crazier, well, he couldn't stop once he started heading into that direction but again!!! Let me say this again, a person like him cannot become twisted in this direction on a natural level. He showed no aggression towards others as a child. IF HE DID THAT, I WOULDN'T BE CONCERNED OVER ANY OF THESE THINGS. I WOULDN'T NEED TO TRY AND MAKE SENSE OF THIS GUY BC I WOULD HAVE UNDERSTOOD.

This is just something I intuitively feel, but—

If the emotions are this overwhelming and filled with despair, Kamiki would have followed Ai a long time ago. That’s just how their personality originally was, right?

I really don’t think they could have continued living or enduring it—

But it seems like something kept them from dying back then.

Aqua went through something similar, didn’t he? Is this truly a natural outcome of their thoughts and feelings?

Aqua was also overwhelmed with such despair that he couldn’t go on living, but then suddenly, he concluded that his father was the culprit. The reasoning was weak… and that conclusion turned out to be far from the truth, but it led him to live for the sake of revenge.

Why do I get the sense that something similar happened to Kamiki?

The guilt and despair Kamiki must have felt were likely even deeper than Aqua’s. Given his original personality, there’s no way he could have endured that… He’s always been a genuinely gentle person. He’s mentally strong enough to hold on for the sake of one person, but if he loses that person, he completely collapses. That person was the foundation keeping his mind together. Ai was the last piece in his Jenga tower, and when she was taken away, he just… crumbled.

Even so, normally, this person would never harm anyone…

He keeps singing about how he can’t go on living, and yet, he’s still here, right? He says he can’t escape from the stage, doesn’t he? What exactly happened to him?

I really think something influenced him. It’s too strange. What is the black star, exactly? Whenever it appears, all the characters start acting strangely. Could it be some kind of deity or malevolent spirit?

It’s impossible to explain otherwise!!! There's GOT to be something up with that thing!!!

I can vividly imagine the feelings this person must have experienced, even if it may only be a glimpse: they’re the kind of emotions that you just can’t live with; it's too overbearing and painful I don’t understand how he managed to survive until now, with that kind of personality. If he were a tougher person, he might have forced himself to keep going even when life felt unbearable, but he didn’t have any reason to live, and the logic he held onto wasn’t all that stable, either. (And for him to hold onto it, he had to degrade to the point of hurting others??) It’s like he was persuaded to believe in something, just like Aqua, holding onto a fragile belief… It feels like someone planted the idea when he was vulnerable.

Shouldn’t we dig deeper into this? There’s something really off about it;; If he’d been strange from the start, I wouldn’t even bring this up, but this person was genuinely a good person. How did he manage to stay alive?

I have a hunch, but could it be right?; If the story ends without addressing this, I feel like it won’t make sense. Usually, people don’t end up like this;;

I hope they unravel the hints hidden in the songs.

Oh, they really need to, because I'm SO STUNNED.. from a psychological standpoint. I need to see the process, because he's too different. And even while being that way, the way he usually acts is still pretty...seemingly benevolent and kind, it's like a shell of who he originally was is coexisting with what's crawled inside and taken over his entire heart. It's intriguing and honestly, really sad to look at because he could have still been that person if Ai was there with him. The guy Ai loved is still there, but it's like... that only exists either within the outer layers as a frail skin, or lies only as a fragment as a part of his soul now. The rest, I feel like it's been painted on.

What happened to this guy?? Many terrible things. Yeah, people WOULD break. They would become insane, I can see that too. But in order for a personality to shift this entirely, to this extent?? This guy was on the extremely kind side and he just flipped just as bad to seem like a demon of some sort and I-;; It's DRAMATIC.

I think this falls into the realm of brainwashing or possession. Will I be wrong??? but this is like.. the only way for Ai's wish to make sense and become a reality...By all means, this guy needs to see a psychiatrist or get some exorcism. Pour saltwater. Perform Misogi on him. Something should be done because he's NOT himself. Well Aqua's dunked him into the waters-

but the song!!!!! it sounds like it means something!!! help, I need them to explain this to me because if this doesn't mean anything, I don't get it. I don't get what else this is supposed to be.

[xxshift4teamcapxx]

A challenge for billy the kid writters

Hey y’all. Ngl been in kind of a ruff patch in my life. Currently homeless and off my meds, but I’m slowly working on it. So hopefully everything will come around soon for the sake of my mental well-being. But anywho, enough about me. Here’s a fic idea that’s been ringing around in my head for a bit.

Reader is wanted and rides around with Jessie and his gang. She killed her abusive husband in a fit of rage without knowing he was a part of the ring. So now she’s on the run with her newborn and has a bit of a tuff outer shell to keep them safe for their survival. She has a habit of keeping her emotions bottled up until she explodes. Making herself look all calm and unbothered around the guys. Jessie introduces Billy to her and at first he’s kind of put off by how easily triggered she can get around certain types of men. Then one day it looks like she’s a hair trigger away from cracking and he can just feel all of the pent up anger and sadness radiating off of her. He talks to her and he kinda has to like give her permission to just let it all out. And she does and it’s just painful to witness. Screaming, punching shit, just a full on breakdown. But he finally sees her and she knows he does and a beautiful relationship blooms between them. He gives her that soft, tender love that feels uncomfortable to her at first but then she gets used to it. She can finally relax and not be in defense mode all the time. And can pay more attention to her baby and be all motherly with her baby like she always wanted too.

I’m not very good at writing without it sounding like an ai wrote it so if you can PLEEEEAASSSEEEE!!!! I’d like the reader to be black or at least WOC friendly and make it angsty as hell with mushy fluff at the end. Give reader her female rage moment y’all. I’m hoping someone actually writes this for real. I swear I’ll repost till my fingers fall off. Sending love to all of you guys.

~Jaz🦚

[misseviehyde]

BAD-BARGAIN

This is a tribute story to one of my favourite artists and online friends. Ashley Hacksaw whose OC Vivian is a sexy slime Goddess. Please check out her work at @hacsaw8 on Twitter. Vivian is her character and I have posted this with her permission.

Billy cowered and whimpered as he listened to his bully Josh tearing up and down the corridor outside the computer room looking for him.

"You can't hide for long nerd, my mates have the exits blocked. I'm gonna tear your fucking head off when I find you. Come out!"

Hiding behind a row of computers, his palms sweaty and his heart pounding, the computer nerd had no intention of complying. Billy was small and weak, Josh powerful and strong. The muscled quarterback was the biggest bully at school and had put people who crossed him into hospital, so perhaps hacking into his social media accounts and sending nudes of Josh's huge cock to every girl at school (including the female teachers) to get him into trouble hadn't been such a good idea.

No one had known it was him of course, but Billy hadn't been able to resist the temptation to brag about what he'd done and now the whole school knew after someone had blabbed. It didn't matter really who had got him in the shit, as soon as he told one person it was inevitable the secret would get out.

And now he was dead.

There was no way out of the computer room and this section of the school. The exits were blocked and Josh would find him soon. What was he going to do?

Hahahahahah!

An amused female voice, sexy and confident with a mischievous and slightly malicious catch to it was laughing near his head. He nearly jumped out of his skin until he realised it was coming from one of the computer monitors.

"What the hell?" he gasped as he lifted his head a little to look at the screen.

A strange... creature... was looking out of the screen with a toothy white grin, breaking the fourth wall and regarding him with big hypnotic eyes. She was clearly female... VERY DEFINITELY female, with curves in all the right places and huge round breasts. Her body was entirely black and her skin looked strangely latexy, as if it could stretch and flow at will. Magnificent red hair cascaded down from her head, flickering and flowing like it was alive like the flames of a fire. Pointed ears swept back from a beautiful perfect face, with full firm lips and the cheekbones of a Goddess. She tapped her face thoughtfully with long sensuous nails... or were they claws?

Hello Billy. I'm Vivian.

Billy backed away, terrified beyond his wits. Was this some prank? An AI accidentally left loaded on the computer, or just some youtube video left open? But no... it.... SHE... had spoken to him. It seemed like her voice was being projected directly into his head. Like she was rooting through his mind.

Oh dear Billy. You're really in the shit aren't you? I like to flow and surf through the web looking for fun and I was drawn by the drama of this situation. You're a weak, pathetic little boy about to be destroyed by a strong powerful Alpha. I really don't see any hope for you and I thought it would be fun to watch. I can really cum hard to something like this.

"This... this isn't real. I'm having a fucking mental breakdown," whimpered Billy - his troubles with Josh forgotten. "What the fuck are you?"

Ohhhh, I'm lots of things. A void creature from another dimension, an all powerful slime Goddess, a sex obsessed little slutty bitch - I'm so fucking much that reality struggles to contain my power. I have to spend most of my time existing here, though I like to pop into reality from time to time. This situation is kinda intriguing. How about I pop through now and say hi.

Billy's head felt fuzzy and he thought he was going to faint as the screen began to bulge. Then with a pop, a sexy head with a crown of dark flames and long red hair pushed through. Moaning and grunting, using her clawed hands to drag herself forward - Vivian pulled herself out of the screen with a hot wet gloop. Her body slid out till with a plop she landed on the floor in front of Billy. She smelled delicious and being near her, Billy felt a strange dusky pheromone rising from her body that made him unbearably horny. Her body... her skin... her hair. He wanted to reach out and touch her, to feel that body.... to know what it was like.

Vivian was tiny, she stood at full head height with her lips at his crotch. For some reason that made his dick twitch hard and the thought of what she could do from that position made him groan with lust. He noticed now for the first time that her hair was so long and thick it was like a tail. It swished behind her like a cat. He wondered how it would feel to grab onto it, to use it to pound her harder. What the fuck was wrong with him?

Her hypnotic eyes held his gaze and she tossed her amazing hair sexily with another wicked grin.

"Like what you see? Unfortunately for you, my scent drives losers like you wild. You're already falling under my control. You see... I can't manifest long in real life without a host. I need someone inside me... I need someone to BECOME me. So I wanna make you a bargain. Get inside me Billy. Become me and I'll protect you from that nasty bully."

As if summoned by her words, Billy heard Josh laugh in triumph from outside. "There's only one place you can be loser, I'm on my way to the computer room."

Jumping up onto the computer bench Vivian spread her legs wide and giggled. Between her wicked thighs Billy could now see a tight slit, a hot wet pussy that was already dripping with lust.

"Fuck your way inside me Billy... get your dick inside my slot and let me flow all over you. Thrust and fuck your way into Goddess until YOU ARE me."

Vivian's obscene scent was blotting out all thought. Her body seemed to ooze power and the thought of mounting her, pushing into her, becoming her was getting too hot to resist. As Vivian he would be unstoppable and safe from the pathetic bully. By allowing her to possess him, Billy would never be weak again.

"Yesssssss," he hissed eagerly as Vivian grinned happily.

"Oh I love it when guys get horny to become me. Hurry up and get inside, I wanna feel you inside me."

Dropping his pants, his cock hard Billy advanced. Vivian eagerly slid forward to meet his cock, moaning as he pushed into her for the first time. "Yessss that's it baby, TAKE ME!"

"Oh my GOD!" screamed Billy. He was a virgin and had never fucked a pussy, so not only was Vivian his first but he had never felt anything so good. Her legs wrapped round his waist, dragging him in even deeper as her hungry pussy seemed to suck and pump him in with every thrust.

"Give yourself to me Billy," hissed Vivan. "Become my boy-host."

"Ohhh my God, I want to become you so badly, take me!" groaned Billy as Vivian's grin nearly split her face and with a laugh she began to melt and ooze all over Billy. Vivian turned to sticky black goo, Billy melting inside and it closing up around him as he jerked and pumped with desperate thrusts.

His cock began to erupt, sperm blasting out everywhere as Vivian absorbed him inside her body, her hair coiling around his head and rooting into his scalp. He felt her claws spring from his fingers, her breasts greedily suck onto his chest. Her face closed over his and he gave her his soul, becoming a willing passenger in his own body as Vivian took full control.

Vivian giggled, her red hair moving as if it had a mind of it's own. She was bigger now - temporarily human sized now she was on a host, and her breasts were even bigger. With Billy inside her, she no longer needed to concentrate on holding her form and now all her powers were at her disposal.

"WHAT THE FUCK!?!"

Vivian raised an eyebrow and laughed as she saw that Josh had finally found her. He had stormed halfway into the room expecting to see Billy, but now as his eyes drank in the monstrous, yet alluring creature in front of him - it was clear he didn't know what to do.

"Hello baby," laughed the slime Goddess. Raising her arms, she levitated slightly into the air and floated across the room towards Joshua... his mouth dropping open as he beheld her true power.

"Wh... what the hell are you?" he gasped in confusion.

"Call me Vivian. That little nerd you want to destroy is inside me, so unfortunately you can't touch him anymore. What he doesn't realise though is that I LOVE a mean bully Alpha. I want you to fuck me Josh. His tiny dick barely satisfied me, but I know you have more to give me."

Josh groaned, Vivian's proximity making him horny and unable to resist. This creature was like no woman he had ever known before, yet somehow she was the sexiest and most wicked creature he had ever beheld. She was making him horny in ways a mortal woman never had.

"My pussy is tighter... my body better than any bitch you've ever fucked baby. I can make you cum so hard you'll be pumping cum into me until your balls run dry. And best of all - all that cum will be going into Billy as well. Just think of him - deep inside me, absorbed but still conscious of every feeling. Helpless to stop you breeding me with your Alpha bully cum until he is addicted to the taste."

Sinking to her knees, her hair whipping out and dragging down Josh's pants, Vivian opened her mouth and slid her thick wet lips around his cock.

Glug, glug, glug.

Joshua moaned as Vivian's sucking mouth slurped and worked up and down his throbbing cock. She didn't appear to need to breathe, so the suction was constant and perfect. Her claws played with his balls, tickling them as her perfect goo like body sent shivers of pleasure into him.

Josh gasped - he'd never had a blowjob this intense, this perfect before. It was like being sucked off by a greedy hoover desperate for cum. It was too much, and with a heaving groan he began to cum.

Vivian moaned happily, gulping down thick loads of hot white cum. Deep inside her, Billy groaned as it flowed into him - his own bullies semen flowing into his stomach.

"Mmmmmh more," she gasped pulling her head off his cock and laying back. Her hair whipped out and dragged Josh in and he groaned as his massive cock slid effortlessly inside her pussy. He had only just cum, but the feelings were so intense and so good that in moments he was horny again.

"Yessss fuck me Joshua," groaned Vivian. "You're such a fucking stud, so much better than Billy. Pump more cum inside me. Pump it in my pussy, my ass - cream me so he's drowning in your semen."

Joshua was only too happy to obey. He groaned as he erupted again, and Vivian screamed in happiness as cum blasted deep inside her and within her perfect body Billy was pumped full of more and more.

"I can't believe I ever considered using Billy as my host," laughed Vivian as Joshua remained buried in her pussy - her legs wrapped round his waist. "It's time to upgrade. Become me Joshua. You know you want this body. Take me from Billy."

Joshua wanted it. He wanted Vivian's body, her power for himself. "Yes bitch, give me your fucking body. Make me into you!"

"Yes Joshua, take it - I'm yours!" screamed Vivian and he began to pound and thrust into her. Each sucking pump of his huge cock now caused Vivian's body to flow and melt, sucking backwards and over his skin.

"NOOOOOO!" screamed Billy as Vivian was ripped off him by his bully. Joshua laughed triumphantly as Vivian flowed all over him - her oozing black slime eagerly attaching to his superior body.

Standing up, the last of Vivian merging with her new host - the slime Queen looked down at her body with glee. Joshua's huge cock still jutted from her crotch. His muscled body meant that she was now over six feet in height and muscled and toned.

She looked down at Billy whimpering below her. He had cum oozing out of his mouth, his ass - it was all over his face and in his hair.

"Look at how pathetic you are Billy," she giggled. "Did I forget to warn you - I'm really bad at sticking to bargains. I just take what I want when I want it. Merged with Joshua, now I'm even more powerful and he LOVES being me."

Grabbing Billy's hair she dragged him up. "Thanks to your little stint inside me, you're now addicted to Joshua's cum. But don't worry, I can give you plenty more."

Moaning and grinning with her wicked toothy smile, Vivan gasped as she slid her huge cock into Billy's eager mouth and he began to suck.

"Good boy, you're my personal cumslut from now on."

Vivian felt herself relax nicely as Billy sucked her off. She was going to enjoy manifesting in this town. She'd spend a few weeks here corrupting and fucking everyone she pleased - then perhaps she'd leave and dive back into the net.

Afterall - there was always another loser looking to make a bad bargain with her.

THE END

[ceoofhelaegon]

Imagine Helaegon making out on the valyrian lego🥵

Vizzy T might be having a lot of mental breakdown from seven hells while watching his kids making out on top his lego lol

OMG, me and @ai-megurine talked about that a few weeks back…

They go to the chambers and have sex there before breaking the Lego set, Helaena is wearing the crown, she always does now.

Aegon just loves to see her riding him, especially with the Conqueror’s Crown.

Sorry, this took a life of its own, Nonnie.

[lonesplashy]

Ok I see ppl on Tumblr talking Abt how much they liked the final episodes but honestly I was severely underwhelmed by the fionna and cake ending. If you don't want to see me just list out everything I like and dislike and why according to my arbitrary personal preferences scroll now.

The second half of the fight with scabby was meh and repetitive. At least the gumlee was cute. Fionna is still the bestest even if her final fight kinda sucked. I love her dearly and I hope she is living her best life.

The lack of Ooo Marceline in the end was literally so disappointing too I wish we could've seen her again at SOME point.

And just in general the ending felt really rushed, I feel like if they had some more episodes to work with it would've been a lot smoother.

Simons pov was just so severely underwhelming, it just felt like filler to me.

I literally didn't care if it was going to be happy or sad ending for Simon as long as it made me feel things like the last couple of episodes did but it just felt totally flat. It didn't really feel like an ending at all. I wouldn't even mind the breakup angle they took under normal circumstances if it wasn't for the fact he like. Literally spent 12 years basically being in a constant mental breakdown, and a thousand years before that subconsciously searching for her, and her literally driving herself to insanity and becoming golb to keep him safe, but wow suddenly everything's chill cuz he played a video game. Ok. Simon just realized that whoops he didn't always take Betty's feelings into account and they parted ways.

And I will repeat: I DO NOT MIND THE BREAK UP ANGLE. IT MAKES SENSE OBJECTIVELY. HOWEVER. IT FEELS LIKE THERE WAS LIKE. TWO MINUTES OF THOUGHT PUT INTO IT. DEFINITELY NOT SUPER HEARTSTRINGS PULLING TO ME. DO NOT GET IN MY COMMENTS BEING WELL ACTKULLY THIS IS JUST ME COMPLAINING ABOUT CARTOONS.

I liked the golbetty in the bus and the golbetty statue. I could bs something about them going their separate ways on a journey the other can't go on and insert trigun quote here about how the ticket to the future is always blank but I just really like golbetty. She's great shes monsterous she's perfect.

Just in general Simon and Betty felt off to me during the final episodes, I can't really put my finger on it but they just felt weird. I'm sure Betty's been doing a lot of thinking in the void and all but it still fell to the left of them I think. The whole time I was watching I was just like. Hm.

Edit: got it. Betty has always been wanting to keep Simon thinking about her. Always. With AI Betty head she flat out said "I knew it would drive you crazy but at least you'd always be thinking about me" and it's like a core thing she does stuff for the Dramatics. While you can argue she's been doing a lot of thinking in the void and matured because of it she's also been a goddess of CHAOS. If anything she's gonna go more loony rather than more mature.

Not to sound like a doomed crazy yuri enthusiast but there are literally no normal or healthy actions you can take after literally becoming a god for someone.

Maybe I'm just too committed to the bit but I'm a solid believer that if you start a weird fucked up path you gotta end on a weird fucked up note. Although the severe disappointment of nothing happening is probably the most fucked up thing they could do to me.

Ik it's supposed to be some sometimes life doesn't give you a tidy ending stuff but also this is fiction I get enough fuck yous like this from reality and ignored job applications I want my fuck yous from fiction to be not sadly vague. Or at least better written.

At least Simon's in therapy. About time.

And the little emoticons he's using in his phone. :)

Do feel free to put your own opinions in on whether you liked or disliked the ending just play nice 🤙

[asimplearchivist]

𝑪𝑯. 𝑽 — 𝑪𝑶𝑼𝑳𝑫 𝑩𝑨𝑹𝑬𝑳𝒀 𝑬𝑨𝑻.

𝐂𝐇. 𝐕 𝐨𝐟 𝐓𝐇𝐎𝐔𝐆𝐇𝐓 𝐈 𝐃𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐌𝐄𝐃 𝐇𝐄𝐑.

[𝓪𝓼𝓲𝓶𝓹𝓵𝓮𝓪𝓻𝓬𝓱𝓲𝓿𝓲𝓼𝓽'𝓼 𝓶𝓪𝓼𝓽𝓮𝓻𝓵𝓲𝓼𝓽] [ 𝐒𝐏𝐈𝐃𝐄𝐑𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐒𝐄 𝐌𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓 ] AO3 | SPOTIFY | PINTEREST summary 🕷️ ⤏ miguel is forced to have a heart-to-heart. pairing 🕷️ miguel o’hara/spider!reader word count 🕷️ 4.5k a/n 🕷️ [gif credit] ⤏ sorry this chapter is a day late, i started back to college today and i managed to finish this by avoiding a mental breakdown bc who doesn't love getting overwhelmed by the workload right off the bat? maybe this one being a little longer will smooth things over. ⤏ this chapter was supposed to be in reader’s pov with a totally different scenario in mind, but I’ll probably use that idea for another chap instead bc I ran out time getting ready for this week and already had some of this written beforehand. I’ll probably require a little more patience with updates going into this semester, but I’m going to try to keep them weekly unless the workload proves too much for my mushy little brain to handle! ⤏ and to anyone else starting back up to school, good luck and remember to take care of yourselves! you’re all beautiful and I love you for taking the time to read my silly little fics. :) ⤏ this one does get a little heavy, y’all—please mind the content warnings listed on this fic’s masterpost, linked below. wounds have to be cleaned before they can heal. 🕷️ MASTERPOST 🕷️ 🕷️ PREVIOUS CHAPTER ⤎ 🕷️ ⤏ NEXT CHAPTER 🕷️

You were different. You looked different.

Despite your near-identical physical and facial features and expressions, the nervous flutter of your hands you always hastily stuffed into your pockets to hide them from sight, the faded denim bomber jacket with embroidered patches hand-sewn along the shoulders and threading at the cuffs that you refused to remove even though HQ stayed a steady seventy degrees and required no such outerwear (and over your thermally regulated UMF suit, no less)—among the countless other details he had compared and filed away into the back of his mind to avoid thinking about them all for too long—you weren’t his esposa.

Miguel had to get that through his head right now. He’d already made that mistake once.

As Jess had predicted, you fit seamlessly into the Spider Society. You got along with all of the main task squad, including Peter B. (as much as that fact irked Miguel to no end), and even the most stoic of the Spider-People with whom you interacted in passing.

You were such a fucking ray of sunshine, friendly to a fault, never failing to have them all smiling by the end of your conversations, no matter how short. You had won nearly the entire collective over with your baked goods—it became routine within a week for you to bring in whatever you failed to sell by the end of the day, and within fifteen minutes the supply was always depleted on a first-come, first-serve basis. Multiple scuffles had already broken out over the delicacies, and Miguel had exasperatedly requested that LYLA put up a waitlist tablet in the cafeteria that they could queue themselves and you could update to avoid future conflicts.

He was finally able to apologize to the AI. After Peter B. had taken you on the tour, she’d emerged in a flicker looking slightly less displeased now that he’d smoothed over his mistake. Once he admitted that he shouldn’t have kept anything from Jess and or snapped at either of them, regardless of the circumstances, she’d perked right back up to normal and had resumed her chirpy, irreverent demeanor. (Much to his chagrin.)

It was good, because LYLA could hold a grudge unlike anyone whom Miguel had ever met. (Maybe that was his fault, to an extent.)

Despite the somewhat rocky start to your recruitment and the argument you and he had shared, you made it a point to visit Miguel when you did make your deliveries no matter what. You tried to start small-talk the first few times, but either he was too invested in his analyses—zoned in to the point that even his hyperactive senses blocked out any other stimuli—or he couldn’t muster the emotional fortitude to formulate proper responses from hearing your voice again after particularly bad nights, so most of the time you entered silently, left him your humble offerings (always his favorites), and departed without a word. He stayed on a strict diet to maintain his mass and bulk, and consuming that much sugar that regularly would inevitably ruin him, but…it always smelled so good, tasted even better, and he would be halfway done eating them when he would realize that his resolve had cracked. (Again.)

Miguel was uncertain of your motivations. He hadn’t exactly reciprocated any of your amicability—had barely spoken ten words to you throughout the entire week after you and Jess had backed him up with the Goblin. You’d gone out on a couple of trial runs with Peter B. and Jess since then to get you more accustomed to multiversal travel, and you had transported a couple of rather disoriented lesser villains-of-the-week to their home dimensions without any trouble. Your reflexes, strategizing, adaptability, and burgeoning leadership had condensed hours of wrangling into less than one each time you set out. Your reports were immaculate, and Peter B. and Jess showered you in endless praises once you would return home.

Miguel had watched, so of course he knew how efficiently you worked—but he hadn’t wanted to admit that he’d been observing, and thus let them talk without comment. He had to admit that it was good that he’d bitten the bullet and had recruited you. He could already tell that you would exponentially improve their success rate. You were an excellent Spider-Woman, and your additional work off-world hadn’t impacted that on your own in the slightest.

If only he could get over himself long enough to treat you like everyone else.

The others had already noticed his withdrawal. He wasn’t exactly extroverted by nature, and he certainly wasn’t a man of many words, but Jess had already tried twice to get him to open up about what was bothering him. Peter B. had yet to strike, and Miguel looked forward to avoiding him and that previously promised conversation for as long as possible…which meant that he reclused himself into the lab as much as he could physically stand it.

Which, of course, didn’t last.

“Miguel?”

The man let out a heavy sigh, tipping his head back and to the side to glare at the apparition glowing near his shoulder. “I thought I told you to let me know when he came close.”

“You did,” LYLA remarked idly, inspecting her incorporeal nails as she cycled through multiple shades, “and I did—you just ignored it, boss man.”

Miguel scowled and scrolled through the screens around him, spotting that very notification blinking at him urgently. He swiped crabbily to dismiss it into the ether, gritting his teeth as Peter effortlessly latched onto the edge of the platform and hoisted himself up onto it.

“I thought MJ had an appointment today,” Miguel groused, focusing resolutely on a diagram projecting the potential increase of interspatial warps.

“She did. Three hours ago.” Peter nudged him in the arm. “Did you really lose track of that much time?”

Miguel’s eyes cut over to the clock he had shrunk and put to the side—as well as the timer that was supposed to chime every hour for him to walk around, stretch, and rest his eyes for ten minutes. He’d snoozed it so many times that it had, evidently, given up altogether—or LYLA had disengaged it to keep from annoying him further. He scoffed softly at the time. “I’ve been busy.”

“I’ll say. Your new little protege sure has turned the entire collective upside down.”

“Just say what you want to say and be done with it, Peter. I’m not in the mood.”

A beat of silence. Out of the corner of Miguel’s eye, the older man’s expression had tightened. “It seems like you already know what I’m going to say.”

“Then why are we even having this conversation?”

“Because I’m worried about you. You know. Like friends ought to be.”

Miguel resisted the urge to roll his eyes. “You see me as a liability.”

“I am worried,” Peter reiterated flatly, “that you’re going to get yourself hurt again.”

“Believe me, Peter, I’ve learned my lesson.” Miguel turned about lazily on his heel to face him and bracing his hands on his hips. “You don’t have to spend your precious time worrying about me.”

“I’m going to, regardless.” Peter didn’t have an ounce of insincerity on his face, even as Miguel sneered down at him with half-lidded eyes. “Look. Recruiting her was a good thing. She’s excellent at what she does, and she’ll probably end up on the main squad soon enough with how reliable and level-headed she is. She’s already been tinkering in the robotics lab in some of her free time and blowing the minds of the Spiders that work there. She’s got a lot of potential.” He folded his arms over his chest—for once lacking that damnable bathrobe. “She’s a lot like you, actually, with how independent she is trying to take responsibility for everyone and everything around her. I can already see the martyr and/or hero complex working, or whatever it is about you that you can’t seem to accept help until you absolutely need it.”

Miguel narrowed his eyes at him.

“Don’t give me that look.” Peter pointed his index finger and jabbed him in the sternum. “I’m not stupid, Miguel. Don’t try to lie to me and tell me that you recruited her entirely out of the goodness of your heart.”

“I agreed with Jess that she would fit the bill.”

“She’s also a duplicate of your dead wife.”

Miguel’s upper lip curled back in a silent snarl, baring his fangs. “Careful, Peter.”

Heedless to the danger he tread into, as always, Peter carried on without flinching once. “Put those away—I’m not trying to antagonize you. I just want to know what’s going on in your head so I can help.”

“I didn’t want to,” Miguel pointed out, doggedly avoiding that idea, “and I got scolded for arguing against it, so maybe you ought to go talk to Jess if you have qualms with her eye for recruitment.”

“It’s one thing that you took on another Spider,” Peter digressed, “but…Miguel. It’s only been two months. Are you sure you’re okay dealing with…all this? I know you’re still struggling, and that’s to be expected—what you went through is…beyond anything I could ever handle. Losing May has been hard enough, but losing an entire—”

“Don’t.” Miguel took a lumbering step forward, shoulders tightening. “Don’t you even think about it.”

“What, like you’ve been doing?” Peter shot back, patience thinning. The furrow between his brows deepened. “You may bury it so you don’t have to deal with the baggage, but I remember the aftermath. I remember having to put you back together, to keep you from going straight off the brink. You fell apart, Miguel—and that’s okay! Hell, I would’ve been more surprised if you hadn’t! But pardon my skepticism that you’re suddenly okay enough to be interacting with another version of your wife so soon!”

Miguel’s head throbbed with how tightly he ground his teeth to keep from shouting. “Do you honestly think,” he growled, “that I don’t think about it every second of every day?” He took another step forward, hedging Peter closer to the edge of the platform. “Do you really think that it doesn’t keep me up at all hours? That I’ve gotten a full night’s sleep since then? Do you really think I’m that cold?”

“No. I didn’t say that.” Peter’s eyes flashed. “But what you’re doing isn’t healthy, Miguel. Working yourself to death to avoid allowing yourself to heal isn’t going to get you anywhere but an early grave. And I’m just afraid that she’s going to exacerbate the problem—LYLA told me you’ve been in here for nearly twelve hours! You need to get out—go hit the gym or eat or—or—I don’t know, something! But if her being around is going to cause you to regress, I don’t know that I can condone it—regardless of whether Jess pushed for it or not.” His expression softened slightly, and he reached up to clasp Miguel’s shoulder. “I just don’t like seeing you suffer like this, and I know that you’re not going to ease up on yourself without outside intervention. You’re the one holding all of this together, sure, but you don’t have to be the only one. It won’t kill you to let us in.”

Miguel cast a scathing glare towards the AI, who merely shrugged noncommittally. He managed to retain enough will not to shrug off the grounding touch, even if it made his skin prickle with nerves. “This is my burden to bear,” he responded lowly. “And there’s too much at stake for me to falter now.”

Peter regarded him forlornly for a long moment, eyes scanning his resolute face, before releasing a defeated sigh and throwing his hands up before they landed against the fronts of his thighs with a resounding clap that echoed through the lab. “…All right. Sure. Just…let yourself break, then.” He turned to step to the edge of the platform. “But either way, I’ll still be here to help you get back up, Miguel. I, for one—and Jess, too—aren’t going anywhere just because you keep pushing us away. We’re staying right here because we know you need it, even if you don’t think you do. We’re not going to leave, no matter what.” He cast a glance at him over his shoulder. “I just hope that you can say the same about her, if you’re going to put yourself through all this for her sake.”

Peter leapt nimbly down, and Miguel counted his breaths until the doors swished shut. Only then did he let his resolve crack—and the monitor to his right paid a dear price for it.

“I think you really should listen to him,” LYLA said softly. “He’s only trying to look out for you.”

“I’ve had about enough of you,” Miguel muttered darkly, pinching the bridge of his nose and tucking his chin against his chest.

“Don’t make me lock up the computer. Your health is more important than all this. I’ll let you know if anything turns out abnormal.” She flitted to stare directly up into his eyes, imitating his hunch. “Eating something will help your headache go away, you know.”

He glared balefully down at her. “You’re not my fucking mother.”

“No, but apparently I have to act like her.” She made a shooing motion. “Vamos.* All this will still be waiting for you when you get back.”

“I… fine. Fine.” Miguel engaged the command to lower the platform, setting a timer on his watch for half an hour. LYLA ticked it up to a whole one with a snap of her fingers, ignoring his scowl. “LYLA.”

“Just part of my protocol, boss. Taking care of you is one of my top priorities.” She raised a brow at him. “You should know that by now.”

He…couldn’t refute that. It was a branch of code as deeply embedded into her programming as anything else. His wife had made sure of it.

“…Miguel?”

He stiffened.

LYLA blinked away, leaving him alone on the steadily descending platform. He looked down and spotted you emerging from the shadows, face pinched as you met his gaze.

“Yeah,” he responded tightly. “What is it?”

You held a paper sack in your hand, but the edges of the top were shredded slightly from fretful fingers. “I brought you a snack.”

He closed his eyes with a sigh, girding himself and stepping off the ledge as it finally rested to confront you directly. He accepted the bag. “Thanks.”

You were watching him carefully, eyes lingering a little too long for comfort.

He frowned. “What’s wrong?”

You swallowed, troubled—the internal debate behind your carefully neutral expression was obvious in the way that you chewed the inside of your lip.

Miguel couldn’t say that he was fully kind when he prompted, very firmly, “I’ve already had one fucking heart-to-heart today. What’s one more?”

“You didn’t tell me I was your wife,” you said softly.

That statement took all the puff out of him in one fell swoop. Miguel’s shoulders sank and he looked off to the side. “How long were you listening?”

“Long enough.” You wrapped your arms around yourself. “Why didn’t you say anything?”

“I didn’t think it pertinent to the job,” he mumbled.

“So you planned to avoid me instead. To spare yourself the migraine.” You shook your head. “You didn’t have to bring me on if you didn’t want to, regardless of what Jess said. I didn’t necessarily want to join, you know.”

“You’re good at this,” he protested. “We need you here.”

“I don’t want you to torture yourself for the sake of efficiency. Between the two of us, I’m more expendable.”

His brows furrowed. “You’re not—”

“I’m a danger to your wellbeing, if nothing else.”

“Don’t…” He sighed tersely. “Don’t let what Peter said get to you. He’s a worrywart who sticks his nose in others’ business where he doesn’t belong.”

“It’s only been two months?”

He squeezed his eyes shut. “I don’t want to talk about it.”

“We need to, if it’s going to be this big of an issue. If that’s the reason you can hardly stand to be around me or to look me in the eye…seeing as you’re the main piece to this outfit, obviously the solution is to remove me from the equation altogether.”

“No,” he gritted out. “It’s—”

“Don’t tell me it’s not a problem.”

“It isn’t one!” he retorted.

“For Peter to decide an intervention was necessary? Yeah, I’d sure fucking say it is.”

Miguel let out a low growl, watching your expression slowly cracking at the edges—lines formed in the corners of your mouth as you pursed your lips, a deep wrinkle between your brows—but you still kept that damnable monotone. The same you’d used when you’d initially rejected his invitation to the society.

Indifference as self-defense. Didn’t he know that well?

“Look,” he ground out, “regardless of my…personal background, I mean it when I say that it isn’t something you need to worry about. All my shit doesn’t have anything to do with this.”

Your eyes narrowed slightly. “Obviously that’s not the case.”

He had almost—almost—forgotten how impossibly stubborn you could be, and how badly it pissed him off when you were.

“It’s none of your business,” he retorted.

Your eyes flashed with indignation. “I would have liked to have known at the start—it would have explained the way you act around me and I wouldn’t have had to wonder what the hell I did wrong—but you probably didn’t because you figured it would’ve impacted my decision. And it would have, because I sure as hell didn’t want to put any stress between you and the others. If you knew me at all, you’d know that I hate getting involved in drama.”

“I do know you,” he responded, “and the reason I didn’t tell you is so you wouldn’t have to get involved. Even still, I don’t owe you an explanation—you’re not my wife.”

“No,” you spat, “but a version of me was! Don’t you think that earns me some basic civility? You convince me to take this job against your own wishes and then ignore me for a week? Do you even realize how shitty that is?”

Miguel stepped closer, looming over you, as the hot flush of anger began to creep out of his belly up his neck. “I have enough on my plate,” he muttered, “without you adding to the pot.”

“I wouldn’t even be here if you hadn’t decided to bring me—if you’re going to be all wishy-washy about it, just let me go home and forget about the whole mess!”

Miguel clamped his jaw shut and closed his eyes tightly. “I…can’t do that.”

“And why the hell not?” You were matching his temper now, stoking it like kindling. “If it’s so bad for me to be here because I’m a duplicate of your dead wife, then why can’t you have the decency to act like my dead husband and communicate with me?”

He snapped. “Just because you were born with a mole behind your ear and burned your wrist baking lava cakes for your cousin’s wedding and got a crooked fucking cesarean scar because they let a goddamn student nurse stitch you up in post-op, you aren’t my fucking wife!”

The oppressive hush that directly followed the tapering echo of Miguel’s reverberating roar felt heavy enough to crush the air from his lungs. He dared not look away from your crestfallen expression for fear of letting slip the strict control over his that he metaphorically gripped with whitened, grinding knuckles. Even LYLA uttered not a sound, though it was of no consequence—Miguel could hear nothing but the infuriatingly rapid thrum of your heart as intimately as the mirrored pounding of his own just beneath his third and fourth ribs.

“…She lived?” you whispered hoarsely, to your credit never having flinched once at his enraged outburst. You didn’t even blink, staring at him with rounded, watering eyes and parted lips that only occasionally trembled.

The question was enough to off-center him, and he schooled his snarl into a slightly more composed scowl. “What?”

“She survived?” you croaked, your voice on the razor’s edge of breaking. “She actually made it?”

Dooming follow-ups indeed. Miguel vehemently wanted to refuse to answer them. Never did he want to rehash such a tender wound, especially given…every-fucking-thing about the present situation. It was hard enough having new members of the collective seeking solace in his losses in order to share the burden of their grief, but having such a conversation with (a version of) you…

“...Yeah.” He swallowed roughly. “The labor started two weeks early, and she was flipped over wrong. They had to remove her. She was in the NICU for three days, but…she turned out okay.” For a while, anyway—long before I ever got there.

You nodded, eyes falling to the floor as you worked your bottom lip between your teeth. Your restraint was admirable, but he could see the way you were trembling.

“That’s…that’s good.” You shook your head in a singular, abortive motion. “I…I guess something happened to her after, though. Right?”

Miguel, too, looked away. “Years later. Yeah.”

You nodded once. “…I’m sorry.”

He wanted to stay angry—it was so much easier to be angry than to be upset—but he couldn’t maintain it. Not with how heartbroken you looked. “It wasn’t your fault,” he responded flatly. “Either of you.”

“...What was her name?” you asked softly.

Miguel gritted his teeth. “Gabriella.”

You glanced up at him, the faintest suggestion of a smile tugging at the corners of your eyes. “After your brother?”

His throat clamped shut. He could only nod.

“I’ll bet she was beautiful.” You cleared your throat. “I hope she took after you, anyway.”

“She was. And…she did.”

Your expression shifted into something a little less readable. “I know this hasn’t been easy for you,” you started quietly. “I’m sorry if my being here has made it harder on you. I never meant to hurt you, or—”

“...Stop apologizing.”

“—to be a burden. I thought maybe I’d be able to finally get some closure being close to you, at least, even if you aren’t him, and—”

“Stop.”

“—I feel like I’ve just made it worse for you, and that was never my intention—”

“Stop it!” he pleaded, voice cracking. Your jaw clicked shut, looking stricken. “Please, fresa. Just drop it.”

You blinked. A tear slipped down your cheek. You opened your mouth.

“Don’t apologize,” he gritted out tightly.

“I…okay.” You swallowed, inwardly debating. You eventually caved at his defeated, if expectant, silence. “Did…did you call her that, too?”

Miguel squeezed his eyes shut, half-turning away from you. “...No. I called her Shortcake.” Gabriella’s mother had been Dulcita—but that was what his alternate self had used for her, so he’d adopted that instead to maintain his guise.

“...Oh.” You didn’t seem certain how to respond to that.

Miguel dragged a palm down his dampened face. “Look. It is…difficult. I can’t lie to you even if I wanted to. But you are rapidly proving to be integral to this team, and I’m not going to allow this to interfere with our combat compatibility in the field. But if it makes you uncomfortable, or if it bothers you, then it’s best if you’d just…go.”

“...Do you want me to leave?”

He glared at you. “What does that matter?”

“A hell of a lot.” Your gaze was resolute, unwavering. “I’ll only leave if you ask me to.”

Miguel regarded you for a long time. Finally, he let out a heavy, shaky exhale. “...No. I don’t want you to leave.”

“Okay. Then I’ll stay. And we’ll…work through this. Whatever this is.” You gestured between yourself and him. “For what it’s worth, while it hasn’t been easy by any stretch of the imagination…I still miss him, but it’s a relief when I’m around you, even if it only distracts me for a little while. It still hurts, but…it’s not as bad as it used to be.”

“I…agree.” Miguel opted to sit, sinking onto the edge of the platform and burying his face in his hands to avoid your eyes.

“...I miscarried.”

He peeked between his fingers without moving an inch.

You were fiddling with the fingertip of your suit, absently chewing on the inside of your cheek, gazing at the ground. “I didn’t know until after I’d lost her. Sneaking into a quarantined explosion site and getting bit by a radioactive spider didn’t agree with a baby, evidently.”

Miguel snapped eyes shut against their sudden, burning sting.

“It was too early to know anything. About two months. I…tortured myself about it for years. Felt like it was my punishment for not being there when…maybe if I had been, then Mig—you—he wouldn’t have…y’know.” You drew a shaky breath, your voice pitching with the strain of telltale tears. “She was the only piece of…of him that I had left,” you croaked hoarsely. “And I lost her, too.”

“It’s not your fault,” he murmured, shaking his head morosely.

“...I’m sure telling you the same thing wouldn’t make you feel any better, either.”

You weren’t wrong. “It’s been…longer than two months.”

He felt the weight of your stare on him—but it was sympathetic, not critical.

“I lost my wife three years ago.” He dug his fingertips into his eyes. “But I…did something two months ago that I regret. I learned something about canon events that I didn’t realize before. It…cost me a lot of lives. Countless lives.” He swallowed roughly, daring to look back at you through his dewy lashes. “My selfishness caused irreparable harm. An entire universe collapsed. I don’t want to make the same mistake—or lose you—again.”

Gone was any trace of ire from you. You only regarded him with those soft, sad eyes.

“I don’t want your pity,” he continued, preemptively, “I know I fucked up. I’m not making any excuses for what I did, just…trying to make reparations where I can. Not that there’s much of anything I can ever do to fix that.”

“I don’t pity you, Miguel,” you said softly. “But I am sorry that you’ve been hurt so badly.”

He ground his teeth, tucking his chin sharply against his chest. “It’s a sacrifice to do what I do. What we do. Even if we don’t want to do it. Even when we don’t want the bad that goes with the good.”

You stepped closer to stand between his feet. Your comparatively small, warm hand rested on his shoulder, a light but unwavering touch that anchored him more than he would readily admit. He resisted the urge to lean into it, but just barely. “That line of thinking doesn’t make it any easier, Miguel.”

He nodded silently. It really didn’t, but it was the doctrine he’d preach until he gave his last breath if it meant that another Spider-Person would find consolation in his words.

A long moment crawled by, and Miguel’s resolve was weakening by the second.

Finally, you withdrew your hand, eased back half a step, and turned. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

He let you go. Your unspoken declaration lifted more weight from his shoulders than he realized he’d been carrying: you would stay, even though he’d already managed to hurt you.

He was already indebted to you beyond what he could repay.

[not-so-mundane-after-all]

*crawls out of a swamp, hands you a paper that says "11, 16, 66, and 77 but you choose the fic" then gets dragged back in by vines*

*slaps herself on the forehead with the paper* the only ask I got out of this and I fucking forgot about it

11. Link your three favorite fics right now

But like my fics or the fics I'm reading? I'll go with the second option and rec some good stuff bc it's too hard to pick from my own stuff

First, two Prospect works from my prospie besties, both AUs, both brilliant!

At Your Service by @skoulsons - modern AU where 15 year old Cee starts working at a restaurant and their best employee, Ezra, takes her under his wing (and not only during work hours). Lots of angst and lots of love - and you get to see how restaurants work! How cool is that!

without you, without them by @channelrat - this AU is more in-world and poses a question: what if Ezra knew Cee's mom? What if they were best friends? It's so exciting to follow Cee as she uncovers her family's history and learns more about her mom

The third one is a Hunger Games fic that I've been following for quite some time and I can't wait for another chapter

Long Way Out by lollercakes - a story following the ups and downs (and mental breakdowns) of the relationship between Katniss and Haymitch. It's heavy, it's brutal at times, deals with depression, PTSD, alcoholism, suicidal thoughts and rage (to name a few) but ultimately it's a story about how two broken people can keep each other from falling apart because they are both too damn stubborn to let each other go.

16. How many fic ideas are you nurturing right now? Share one of them?

Realistically? Two. There's more saved in my docs but I'm not being pulled to start them or finish what is started already. One I can share, the one I'll probably be working on next, is a little extra scene for The Bad Batch series finale, where everyone gets a moment to breathe and take care of each other as they fly away from their final battle.

66. How do you deal with writing pressure (ie. pressure to update, negative comments, deadlines, etc.)?

Pressure to update? Deadlines? It's easy to deal with when you're convinced no one is reading your shit lol but seriously, I try to take it easy now. I used to work like a machine (still do sometimes), but not because I knew someone was waiting, but because there were so many ideas in my head that I just wanted to be done with the current one so I can start the next. I didn't want to lose any of them. These days I try to tell myself "there is no deadline". Fics don't have deadlines. You release them when you feel like they're ready, you work on them when you have time and energy to do so.

And as readers, we should know and respect that. I'm also a reader who's waiting for updates on her beloved fics - written both by strangers and by friends. But no matter how much I want to read what happens next, I won't pressure them to update. When they're ready and the story is ready, then I'll get to read it.

As for negative comments? I rarely get them, the ones I did were from fandom trolls that were pressed about stupid bullshit, or it was straight up AI generated comment. What I do? Read, delete, never think of it again.

77. Do you have a favorite scene you’ve written from [Fanfic Name] story/chapter?

These two bits from The Art of Letting Go

Because it's so angsty!!! We see Hunter and Omega argue in the show but never to this extent! It never turns into a fight! I cried writing those. But it felt so good!

Thank you for the ask! Sorry you had to wait so long.

[splonk-fox]

The Amazing Digital Circus Theory: Kinger is an AI

With a community as big as The Amazing Digital Circus' has become, it should come as no surprise that it has quickly been subject to fan theories and speculation. And while I mostly want to keep the kind of stuff I post on here away from fanon and more towards analytical stuff that we can observe in pieces of media that I enjoy, I have myself a theory that, depending on how this show ends, could either be completely wrong, or completely right. But hey, that's the beauty of fan theories is it not? So let us not waste anymore time and get straight into this!

To first set the stage of what this theory is built off of. In the recently released second episode of the show, Caine (after hearlessly blowing Gummigoo to smithereens) talks of how he doesn't want to accidentally mix up AI with real people, as if he did that. Who knows what would happen?

Many people point to this scene and bring up how strange Caine's delivery of this particular line was, combined with the closeup, something which we only see when Caine is being serious about something, has lead to many people believing that perhaps what he was talking about as a hypothetical might have happened before. This single statement alone has launched an array of fan-theories that one of the main cast is actually an AI as opposed to a real person, but if this is true, then who is it?

When it comes to people's fan speculations as to who the AI person could be, a lot have suspected that maybe Jax is the AI. With people even making fanart of said fan theory. Now on the surface, I could see this idea being viable.

It would explain why Jax seems so casual about the circus, and it could also explain how he is able to utilize cartoon physics with seemingly managing to manifest keys out of thin air and stealing them from others such as Ragatha despite there being no point where he could've possible done this.

Jax also does mention being hungry at the end of the pilot despite Kinger pointing out how this isn't really possible. So considering all of that Jax does seem like a pretty viable candidate, and I am not here to discredit that idea. However I do believe there are a few holes in it.

Mainly that, if he were an AI, how did this slip under Ragatha and Kinger's radar? We know that the two of them were in the circus before anyone else, so it would be odd for them to not realize that he was actually an AI the whole time. Now of course, this is pretty surface level evidence against the theory, but it's just enough evidence for me to say that I don't personally believe this to be true.

But if the AI isn't Jax, then who is it? Enter, the main subject of this theory.

Kinger.

If there has to be one person who turns out to be an AI this whole time, then I believe Kinger is the most likely, and I am going to go over why I believe this to be true. So sit back, relax, cause we're about to get real speculative with this one.

Behavior

It's no secret that Kinger acts weird, even for the series. He has a short attention span, is going on about game shows and insect collections. In general, he is just weird. And while Jax has said that this is simply because he has spent the longest in the circus, how true really is this statement?

First off, I would like to mention that Jax says that Kinger has "supposedly" been at the circus the longest, as if this isn't a well-known fact, but rather an assumed observation, this also means that him being crazy because of how long he has spent here might not be entirely reliable.

But even if Kinger really has been here the longest, that still wouldn't explain his odd mannerisms, considering that Ragatha, the person who has been here the second longest, is nowhere near as off her knocker as Kinger is. While it'd be a stretch to say she's entirely mentally sane, if her being on the verge of a breakdown when explaining abstraction is any indication.

I still feel that it is generally a fair statement to make that Ragatha is a lot more mentally stable than Kinger is. But why is this important? Well I came to realize something recently about Kinger's behavior that might just point us toward his true identity.

You see, while it's true that, compared to the other humans who have been trapped in the circus, Kinger acts the most strange, there is actually a character who reflects his odd mannerisms a lot more closely, and that character is...

Caine!

Like Kinger, Caine displays a lot of weird and out there behaviors. From screaming a lot, to doing or saying things that don't really seem to make a whole lot of sense. Caine is all about his random and wacky behavior, something that is also shared with Kinger.

Now, considering that Kinger, the supposed "real person" acts a lot like Caine, the digital AI who's whole thing is being incredibly goofy, random, and eccentric, isn't it a bit odd that Kinger acts so closely to a character who is (as far as we know) no way an actual human being?

On a side note: If Kinger is an AI as opposed to a real person, it would explain why he refers to himself as a royal despite that only being his avatar. Since if he was literally made this way, then obviously he would actually see himself as royalty.

Knowledge of the Circus

And this is where we get to my next point. Kinger is very knowledgeable of how the circus operates. This is best shown to us when Jax mentions being hungry where Kinger is quick to correct him, pointing out how no one actually needs to eat in the circus and as such food only gives off the virtual sensation of eating. This shows us that Kinger understands how the circus works.

Now on its own, this wouldn't mean much. You could easily attribute this to Kinger being the one who's been trapped in the circus the longest, and you would be fair to make the assessment, but let's focus on that for a bit. Kinger has supposedly been at the circus the longest... that would mean that, unlike characters such as Jax, who's true identity as an AI would be harder to slip under the radar, Kinger could actually achieve this since no one who hasn't abstracted has seen him enter the circus.

Beyond that though, Kinger being an AI would explain how he can know all these things about how the circus operates, cause he was programmed with said knowledge. People have also theorized that Kinger's talk of "insect collections" are actually referring to bug fixes, which if he as an advanced AI, then he would be able to spot things such as glitches, it's in his code!

But here is where I get into the real meat of this theory. Where I truly believe that if Kinger truly is an AI, could explain a lot about this show's history. And it all comes down to one character.

Queenie.

Queenie, despite being a character who's only seen briefly in the pilot episode as one of the crossed out doors, has quickly been a source of fan speculation.

What is her deal? Why does she appear to be so similar to Kinger? For starters, despite the incredibly limited knowledge we have of this character, we do know a few things.

For one, she's clearly no longer a member of the circus, likely becoming a victim of abstraction like Kaufmo and the other crossed out doors.

She also is, despite her similar appearance and name, not related to Kinger, she was not his sister in any way.

Now the latter of these two things have lead many to believe that perhaps Queenie was Kinger's lover, and while I wouldn't dismiss this idea outright, I still feel it doesn't explain why Queenie has such a similar appearance to Kinger.

Now granted, we don't know much about how avatars are picked out for the human prisoners in the circus. But we do know that they don't seem to be picked out by Caine as he shows surprise at Pomni's entrance.

The closest thing that we can guess as to how it works so far, is that the avatars are somehow based off of the characters' real world counterparts. Though it's also possible that it could be completely random.

Either way, to have two prisoners inhabit incredibly similar bodies and have similar names is such a weird and specific coincidence that there is little to know way this happened randomly. But then how did it happen? How did two human subjects end up with similar bodies?

Simple answer is, they didn't.

I believe that Queenie was actually a real human subject. She was a real person who got trapped within the circus, and that Kinger was some form of AI created by Caine.

Why did he make him? Who knows? Maybe Queenie was having a hard time and Caine wanted to make her feel better? Whatever reason there is for why he decided to do this, the point is, Kinger now exists.

Yet when the time came to wave goodbye to Kinger, Caine made a massive mistake, he mistook Queenie as being the AI he made, and snapped her out of existence, leaving Kinger behind.

This could explain a lot actually. First off, it would explain how Caine could even have a mixup like this in the first place. By having two subjects, one human, and one AI, and having them both look nearly identical, it is believable that someone as gullible as Caine would end up making the mistake of mixing up who is who and accidentally killing the wrong person.

At some point down the line, Caine realized this, he realized how much he screwed up. That he just killed a real person. And so, to make sure that this never happens again, he doesn't allow for any more AIs to live within the circus.

As for Kinger? Well he's still around. Perhaps Caine decided to just... pretend that he was a real person, sweep everything under the rug, we know how he likes to keep his secrets, why wouldn't he do the same here? Perhaps he felt some guilt from the incident and decided to let Kinger live and serve as Queenie's "replacement", whatever the reason is for keeping Kinger around despite him being an AI, I believe that this theory could explain a lot.

It would explain why Kinger acts so weird when compared to everyone else, why he knows so much about the circus, why he seems to have adapted to his role of "royalty" despite that supposedly being just an avatar, and why he's the person who has been here the longest. Because he may have very well been there since almost the very beginning.

One a smaller note, if Kinger was an AI, that would also give us a decent estimate to how long the circus has been around. We know that his canon age is 48, which would mean that at a minimum, The Amazing Digital Circus, as a program, has existed for almost five decades, perhaps even more than that assuming there were members such as Queenie who existed even before Kinger did.

Now do I necessarily believe this theory to be 100% true? No, not really. We are far too early in the show's runtime for us to truly make any sort of definitive conclusions about any of the main cast just yet. With all that being said, I do believe this provides some interesting food for thought that could possibly explain a few things about Kinger, as well as some of the circus' previous members such as Queenie.

To any of you patient enough to read through this whole thing, thank you for taking time out of your day to read this essay. I hope I didn't come off as sounding too rediculous, and I hope you all have a good day!