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keruimi · 5 months

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The Person behind My Passion

Pairing: Tsukishima Kei x Reader

Warning: Angst and Comfort

Note: I wrote this while I was watching an amv about him. Titled: [AMV] Tsukishima Kei - Pride. It inspired me to write this for a better imagination. I suggest you watch it. My first Haikyuu oneshot so enjoy!!!

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"I'm quitting"

Those were the words I let out in front of the volleyball team in my second year of high school.

For the reason...

Of not being happy at this place anymore.

"Tsukki! Are you crazy?!" I heard Yamaguchi the moment I stepped out of the gymnasium with my belongings as I didn't bother looking back anymore.

"Tsukki!" I kept hearing him calling for my name until I felt my ears block any sounds from my surroundings.

Until I finally felt the strange throb in my chest.

Right...

I don't love volleyball. Because it's one of the reasons for my trust issues. The reason why someone lied to me.

But right now... I'm asking why I gave it another chance.

A second chance to dedicate myself to it again.

Volleyball was my hobby before, until it became my passion the moment I proved myself worthy to be a player in the court.

All of it started, because of one lady that caught my interest.

"I want to see you in court. In the volleyball court"

That was her first request from me. The request that made her close to me.

The sport that helped me build my relationship with her.

The game that made me see the happiest moment of her life. The plays that made her my proudest fan.

I felt a tear slide from my cheek.

The game that made her love me deeper, but was never enough to make her stay at all.

Fuck...

I feel like I'm losing myself

~•°•~

"I don't believe that Tsukki would quit like that so easily!" I shouted in frustration towards my fellow members as I held back my tears.

I will make sure he stays.

After all, I believe he started to love volleyball again.

"Yamaguchi"

"Tsukki" I felt myself start as I properly stood up. "He's the type of person to love something the moment he starts to be happy with it"

"I don't dare believe he would leave wholeheartedly"

"Why are you leaving?! I thought you began to love it again?" I managed to catch up to him when he halted from his steps.

I grabbed his uniform and made him turn to look at me but I stopped when I saw how he gazed at me.

It feels so foreign to me.

"What's wrong Tsukki"

"Please tell me"

Silence settled around us as I fisted my hands when those seconds turned minutes.

"Tsukki!"

"I have no reason to stay"

"Because she was the reason I played"

"I will make sure to bring him back"

~•°•~

Why did we end up in this way?

A man who once stood beside her, can just silently linger his gaze on her.

I look away with that thought as I put my headphones on my ears to block the voices of the people around me.

I hate how my heart can't stop aching.

Where did it go wrong?

Where did I go wrong?

I hate when I feel like I am the one who lost everything.

When she was the first one to love me.

"How was it?" She asked me as I lent her my jacket before we started walking back home.

"It was fine" I told her as I heard her hum happily that moved my heart a little.

"I am so happy you got accepted. Rest assured, you would always see me in your games" she declared wholeheartedly as I nod, going along with her words.

Silence surrounds both of us when she notices I kept my mouth shut.

I just stopped walking when I didn't hear her next footsteps. I looked back and saw how she stayed still in her place while looking at the sky above us.

"I love you because you play volleyball..." She whispered before she lowered her head for our eyes to meet each other.

"But I didn't know seeing you play again would be one of the memories I choose to cherish." She chuckled before she went closer until she stopped in front of me.

"You really made me happier, Kei"

The woman who made my heart skip a bit, would be the same person to break me into pieces.

She started everything...

But she was also the same woman who left me with nothing...

I felt someone stood beside me that made me glance at them and saw her.

I didn't bother talking as I stood up to leave.

"I heard you quit"

Those were her first words that made me scoff.

"That's right" I told her as I fix my things as the class reaches its end.

"Why" I didn't fail to notice how her voice turned to whispers that made me scoff.

It is not obvious?

"Why did you leave?"

That I only played volleyball for her.

"Because I chose to"

"Kei" she called out when I answered her as I zipped my bag close.

"You made me hate it" I honestly admit to her as I saw how her eyes widened a little.

"I never wanted to play that sport again until you came into my life. A woman who reminded me how I loved volleyball back then" I looked back at her.

"I hate myself for giving it another chance" I continued as I properly faced her.

"Just because of one woman"

She stayed still facing me as I saw her contemplate whether to say the words she was thinking or stay silent.

"Tell me what you wanted to tell me" I sighed as I let my hands fall to the side.

"Does Kei hate me?"

I looked down on her who chose to not look at me as I felt my chest tightening.

"I hate you so badly"

Because I started to love you truly.

"You love volleyball" I started before I gazed on the window behind her to see how the sun started to set.

"But it was just a club for me" I muttered. "I have no reason to keep going for it"

"I'm sorry"

I heard her but I was so numb that her apology felt so empty.

It felt nothing...

I felt myself leave the room as I let my feet and took me to where it decided to guide me.

And I saw myself staring at the open gym doors of the volleyball court.

Great...

I felt myself getting suffocated when all of the feelings I felt in this gymnasium went back to me.

When can I have peace of mind?

Why is everything blurry in my mind?

These are the times I need to keep my cool.

But I felt my cold barrier broke when Nishinoya was the one who stood in front of me.

He silently stared at me before he sat on the bench near the gymnasium while I stayed still in my spot because I got caught.

I wonder what his next words will be...

"Right now, I'm going to blame your impulsive thoughts when you decide to quit the team" he stated with his arms crossed while I saw him look ahead the moment I turned to face him.

"You get the recognition you wanted. A great player you wanted to be. Why did you quit?" He looked up to me and I felt how serious he is on this entire ordeal I started.

"I can't play like how I used to be" I admitted as I leaned on the wall near me.

"I feel like I can't keep my focus back on the game"

That was the truth. Because volleyball reminded me of her.

Now we broke up, it feels like I will lose my entire focus. Since I dedicated the game to her.

"It will be too much for me"

I don't want to drag the whole team because of my heartbreak.

He kept silent that made me close my eyes to cherish the small sounds of balls hitting the floor and the squeaking of the player's shoes.

The sounds that I got accustomed to.

"Do you love volleyball?"

"I don't know" I answered without a second thought. "But.."

"I did love the moment that everyone cheered for me. It was those moments I thought I would never experience"

"Volleyball..."

Was everything for me, like she was to me.

"I love volleyball because I am good at it. And I found the friends I needed" I heard him that made me open my eyes to gaze at his back.

"If that one reason left, find another reason to stay" he stood up from his seat before looking back at me with a smile.

"After all... You began to love volleyball too"

I let him walk past me as the blank color of my mind finally started to fill with thoughts.

His words made me realize. I found the things I love because of volleyball.

I look at my hands that I used to receive the spike of players.

I somehow need to learn how to play with a heavy heart.

It's been three weeks since I finally decided to approach Takeda-sensei to give back the form he returned to me the moment I declared on leaving.

That moment, it felt like everything went back to their own places.

I was glad that the team welcomed me back without side remarks. The things I would usually do if someone is in my shoes.

But that time, I learned to put my happiness in volleyball.

I went back to my usual routine after getting the hang of the break up.

Everything is going as it should be, until I saw her in the library.

She was laying her head in a table as her close eyes captured my attention.

Somewhere deep within me, I wish everything would go back to the way it was before.

Everything...including our relationship.

I remove my eyes from her as I decide to walk to another aisle until I hear her tiredly call for my name that made me halt from my steps.

I looked back and thought she was just sleep talking but I changed my mind when I saw her sit properly while rubbing her eyes.

"You're finally here"

Her words made my mind blank as I looked at her with no emotions.

Do we still need to talk?

"Can we please talk?"

I felt my heart start to feel heavy again as I frown in annoyance because of these feelings.

I still can't get over her.

"Let me get this straight. I don't want you calling for me anymore. You and I are nothing but strangers"

"I'm sorry" she cut me off that made me prevent myself from frowning harder.

"I know. You already told me that"

"Fear took over me" she muttered as she slowly blinked her tears away. "Because you became someone so great, I feel like I'm not deserving of you"

"I felt like you would get tired of me. I thought I could get used to your dismissive character. But it scared me" she didn't give me a chance to cut her off so I finally chose to stay silent.

"I thought I could careless what you think of me, but I didn't know I cared about your words so deeply" she wiped her tears before looking back at me.

"I was afraid I will become no one the moment you reach something bigger. Our future turned blurry the moment your status to the public changes."

"You change to someone better while I am still the same" she sobbed out.

"Until it felt like I don't belong in your world anymore"

~•°•~

"I hate this"

I suddenly started as I heard Yamaguchi let out a small sigh in confusion as I scoffed.

My mind was jumbled again. Just because I met her.

The world keeps testing my patience.

"She apologized to me. She told me the reasons I decided to not seek anymore" I told him as I decided to be the one to stop walking so I can talk to him properly.

"Right now, is it acceptable to just leave or give another chance that will surely break me"

I saw him lift a small smile to me before shaking his head.

"Y/n..." He called out for his name before sitting down on the sidewalk that was in front of me.

"She was the type of person to be happy at small things. But small things can also hurt her easily"

He looked up to me with a small smile.

"Everyone is deserving of a second chance, Tsukki. It was a chance where you could correct all the wrong things." He stated as he sigh before looking at the moon above us.

"Don't deprive her of it. Since you also didn't give her the assurance she needed." He stated truthfully before standing up to face me.

"You should see the slight changes. Especially when you love a woman whose love language is words of affirmation" he chuckled before patting my shoulder.

"Another chance for both of you"

"For a peaceful life"

Those were the times I was thankful that I have Yamaguchi in my life.

Now, the woman who once broke me, was the one who I also decided to embrace.

The moment feels so right.

That I decided to just forget our past and focus on the new relationship we both have.

The person who proves to me that second chance is not always bad.

Sometimes, it is also given to us to correct the mistakes we both had.

Because of her...

Second chances feel so right...

#haikyuu #haikyuu oneshot #haikyu x reader #haikyū!!#haikyuu tsukishima #haikyuu tsukki #tsukishima kei #tsukishima x reader #hq tsukishima #hq #hq x reader #hq x y/n #haikyuu comfort #haikyuu angst #haikyuu anime #kei x reader #tsukishima kei x reader #Spotify

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2hoothoots · 26 days

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Revisiting P2 since the docu epilogue dropped and your AMV (<3) popped up as a sign for me to ask something that hopefully you haven't already spoken about years ago: What did you think of the in-game psych explanation for Maligula, that she's the primitive savage part of the mind? P2 is a weird mix of sketchy Freud/Jung concepts that Tim likes meshed with modern psych, and Maligula's deal seems like something they probably wrote a lot of different versions of but never quite solved elegantly

yeah, i think you totally hit the nail on the head - it's always felt like one of the parts of the story that they couldn't quite give enough polish to before they had to finalize it and move on with development. like - i went to go get my artbook to see if it had any insight into the writing process, and did you know that Nona and Maligula being the same person was apparently added way later in development? that's wild! i didn't know that until literally right now! i may or may not have skipped straight to my favourite characters when my artbook arrived and then put it on my shelf without reading the whole thing

ANYWAY, retrospectively i think it being a twist that was added later actually makes a lot of sense in the context of everything you mentioned. the Maligula problem, to me, is the fact that they're trying to juggle a bunch of different things that she has to be in the story. there's Maligula, the ruthless big bad, and Nona, the beloved grandma, and if you suddenly have to also make them both the same person... well, it ends up being kind of a thorny writing problem to make that work, haha.

here's some art i made so this isn't just a wall of text, rest of the answer under the cut

i think one thing they could have done when they needed to rehabilitate a mass-murderer into a lovable old lady was pull back on either end of the spectrum. make your villain softer and more sympathetic, or give grandma a mean streak like she's one bad day away from a tragedy at the crochet club. and to give the story credit, i'm really glad they didn't. Nona is relentlessly sweet and endearing - and that's great! she needs to be in order to make the audience care about her, otherwise the emotional beats are never going to land. likewise, Maligula is a great villain, she's vicious and ruthless and at the culmination of her arc we see she simply does not give a shit about murdering hundreds of people. i love that for her, honestly, you go girl

but then, like - how do you connect the dots? how do you frame grandma having a violently murderous streak in a way that doesn't make the ending of "but she's over it now" feel kinda weird and hollow? and how do you do that while also being sympathetic to the game's themes around mental health? Maligula's informed by the traumatic things that happened to Lucrecia during the war, but she can't just be a manifestation of trauma, because the moral of the story being that trauma makes you a mass-murderer (until you beat up your trauma and shove it in a giant pit) would feel... really tonally dissonant!

so i think you're totally right that the sprinkling of pop-psych concepts we get ends up feeling a little bit like an awkward band-aid. Maligula's story is about how the horrors of war can shape you into a terrible person, who does terrible things - ...but there's also, like, special circumstances, so it doesn't feel weird that she goes back to being Raz's sweet grandma afterwards. special psychic circumstances! she's not just any war criminal, she's the fight or flight response gone out of control!

which - i dunno, i think that line in particular always stood out to me, because that's not really what the fight or flight (or freeze or fawn) response is, right? it's a temporary boost of adrenaline to the system to rev you up for getting out of a dangerous situation. an overactive fight or flight response is called chronic stress and anxiety. i know the games are pop-psych and not actual science, but it always stood out to me as a little awkward.

if it were me in the writer's seat - with the benefit of all the time in the world to workshop it, and no looming deadlines, and the hindsight of having a full completed game in front of me to think about - i might have tried to frame it around connection. i think you could swing the lens to instead focus on how violence, stress, trauma etc., make it harder to understand and empathise with the people around you. the tragedy of Lucrecia's story is that she came home to try and help her countrymen, the people she cared so dearly about. but the more time passed, the less she cared, the less she was able to see them as people. after Marona's death, the Maligula that remains is one who's unable to even care about killing her own sister. the alternative is too raw, too painful - instead, she sheds her last vestiges of remorse, and throws herself into the easy relief of violence. (we see this again, when Nona "awakens" as Maligula - when confronted with the baggage of her past, she chooses to wash it all away with force, unable and unwilling to care about the people she used to call friends.)

and i think shifting the focus like that ties it in thematically, too. a big theme (of both games, but especially the sequel) is how important connection is, how being able to understand and reach out to and rely on other people is a lifeline during hard times. PN2 touches on how there aren't really "good people" and "bad people" - everyone has the capacity to do wonderful or terrible things, and i think Raz's line to Maligula about how "everybody's got something like you" works. Lucrecia was never a monster, no matter how everyone tried to pretend she was. she was just a person, the same as everyone else - and just like everyone else, she could be pushed to extremes under the right circumstances. it just feels kind of odd when the implicit context is "everybody's got a mass-murderer hidden in the primal recesses of their brain", hahaha.

but like, again, that's the privilege of hindsight, right? i've definitely also been on the other side of the creative process, stuck with something i suddenly need to make work in a story and having to come up with a solution that feels like a band-aid. sometimes you just gotta call it good enough, and move on. and i think the game is overall much stronger for having Nona and Maligula be the same person - it plays into the wider themes, it sets up some great emotional beats, and i think it's overall well-executed, even if there are one or two hiccups in the writing.

anyway, great ask! thank you for the invitation to ramble, this is something that stuck out to me on my first playthrough of the game and it was fun to sit down and get my thoughts in order

#psychonauts #psychonauts 2 #one more thing: i also think that the in-game explanation falls a little into 'hidden dark side' cliches #sometimes i see people talking about characters unleashing their 'inner maligula'. and i feel like that's kind of a misreading of the story #like imo maligula is a side of lucy that was drawn out over time. she wasn't some hidden darkness waiting to strike #she formed like scar tissue as lucy was forced to do more and more horrible things for the sake of her country #until it finally became too much to bear #but on the other hand - the game /does/ kinda frame her as 'hidden primal anger and violence that everybody has lurking within'#so! i dunno! maybe /i'm/ the one not understanding the themes lol #but it definitely feels a little clumsy in places #also: i do shamelessly love the games' approach to pop psychology #love the combination of modern understandings of trauma and therapy with #'what if freud was right and people could shoot beams out of their brains about it'#oh! and happy birthday to psychonauts 2. i've been away all week so hadn't even noticed #ask

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seaofolives · 1 month

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so this is a really random poll (and my first one on this blog!) but it figures now that I've come up with a "good name" I'd be interested to try:

the abstract of the poll/challenge/idea:

1. I'm calling it "torokatober" from トロカト/torokato. no need to apply strict top/bottom dynamics, of course.

2. I do this challenge every year where I write drabbles every day of october for a particular character/ship. this time, 3x4 is my subject of choice

3. anyone who wants to join won't have to be limited by drabbles! that's just me. others can do whatever they want like longer or shorter fics, art, cosplay, model kits, gif sets, amvs, playlists, etc etc etc

4. if the poll gets good traction and interest, I can open a prompt suggestion form just so I won't have to come up with all the prompts myself 😂 but if the poll doesn't get any traction/we don't get enough prompts to fit 31 days, I can just fill it up on my own, dw XD

6. probably gonna use the hashtags #torokatober2024 and #トロカト１０月２０２４年 for collecting works. so even if no one's interested, I'll post the prompts and my own works there 😂

5. this is going to be strictly diy—no mod accounts, no ao3/sqwa collections, zero promotions or pressure, no strict rules, whatsoever. if you answered you'd love to participate but suddenly can't, there's no guilt or penalty. any kind of pairing that involves these two are welcome, any rating or restrictions welcome, etc

7. poll is up for a week! someone also remind me to submit this thing to the central gw accounts bc I'm queueing up this post and don't always check tumblr 😂

8. last random ask! do these two have an "official" emoji pair??? like 🎭🎻? 🤡🎻? 🪈🎻?? 🤸🤺 or 🎪🏜️ or just 3️⃣4️⃣???? or am I just being too much of a feller-kids lmao but I like shippy emojis ok (or should I do another poll)

#g wing #3x4 #gundam wing #3x4x3 #trowa barton #quatre raberba winner #quatre winner #torokato #トロカト #uhhhh what else

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starleska · 1 year

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hi! im a really big fan of your fanfics (especially the wally ones) and i’m really curious to know what are songs that you associate with him?? please don’t be afraid to share!!! i really like talking and gushing over wally darling with a fellow wally simp lol

hey there anon!! 💖 aww my goodness you are so lovely, thank you!! it brings my heart so much joy that you like my writing...i can't believe the surge of wonderful feedback fired my way over this past week 🙈🙈 what a fun question!! there's a few songs i associate with Wally right now, and i'm sure more will pop up as we learn more about him;;; some are less overt, and more to do with Wally x Reader vibes - or, my terrible musical taste/hallucinating scenarios while listening to the same twenty songs 😂 fun simp challenge!! have a listen to a few of these with your eyes shut, thinking about Wally. you're guaranteed to have a good time 😉

Songs I Associate with Wally Darling:

Touch-Tone Telephone by Lemon Demon. no one could've seen this one coming 😂 no, as soon as i discovered Welcome Home i knew i'd finally found the right character to edit this song with. the conspiracy theory, cryptic vibes, slight desperation and of course retro-phone theming all work so well for Wally! 🥰

Out of My Mind by CG5. total coincidence that this banger dropped just as i learned about Welcome Home, and there's something cathartic and hypnotic about that repetitive chorus that fits with a lot of theories about Wally's struggles with Home...i had this one on repeat while writing The Nightmare Picnic 👀

An Unhealthy Obsession by The Blake Robinson Synthetic Orchestra. this one's for all the yandere!Wally fans out there - i think every person who's a fan of terrifying, obsessive characters loves this song 😉 this is the one had on repeat while writing those yandere!Wally headcanons - i actually included it to listen to whilst reading in the original post, but i ran out of space!! 🙈

INSANE by Black Gryphon & Baasik. i know, strike me down for including a song made specifically for another Tumblr Sexyman on this list!!! but come on - the static, the showmanship, the overt friendliness masking a smiling, curious sadism...don't pretend like you don't enjoy this take on Wally, i've seen the fanart 😂

LA Devotee by Panic! at the Disco. this one's jam-packed with fun occult imagery and all about fame and obsession, so it feels perfect for our children's puppet show ARG!! something about it just hits right with how the fandom perceives the darker side of Wally 😳 i'm listening to this a lot at the moment as i've got a Metalocalypse MEP part to this song in the works, but my thoughts can't help wandering to Mr. Darling;;

Super Psycho Love by Simon Curtis. lord help me, you can tell i was in the AMV-making community in the late 2000s/early 2010s 😂 this song's a staple for attentive, manipulative, obsessive characters...even if we end up being totally wrong, and Wally is a Darling in more than name, we'll always have fun with our unhealthily possessive fantasies 🥰

Teenage Dream by Katy Perry. hey, i'm a basic bitch - i love listening to sugary-sweet, fluffworthy AMV music whilst writing my x Readers 🙈💖 a lot of the folks who request Wally often bear a little bit of their souls when asking - revealing insecurities about themselves, and wanting to be reassured he'd love them anyway. this is such a pretty, nostalgic song, and i think it captures the softness with which many of us would like to be treated by him ✨

Crush by Mandy Moore. similar to the last entry, yet leaning even more into that bubblegum romance vibe...i'm simply weak for blushy crush scenarios 🥴💖 i like this one a lot for x Readers, especially an embarrassed Reader absolutely overcome with how precious they find Wally 💖

Stray Italian Greyhound by Vienna Teng. one of my favourite songs of all time, and the perfect choice if you want your heart to ache 💔 i think this is a wonderful choice when thinking about a hurt Reader...someone who has fully given up on love, only to be confronted with Wally's relentless sunshine personality and falling head over heels 🥺 this song speaks to why i think many of us are infatuated with Wally...his charm coming from that childlike outlook, his tendency to love everything and everyone. lots of us could benefit from that kind of unconditional love, i think;;

#wally darling x reader #wally darling x you #wally darling #welcome home #welcome home arg #starleskasks

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ninja-knox-ur-sox-off · 1 year

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[causally re-opens askbox] ASKBOX BACK OPEN BOOOOIIIS

Quick FYI: this time I'll be deleting more asks that I don't have the time/mental energy to answer. More on that under the cut o7

Types of asks that will be probably be deleted immediately:

walls of text

discourse posts

hc's/ideas i don't like

"can you read/look at my art/writing/hc's/edits-" (again, nothing personal, I'm just not up to giving feedback for other peoples content rn)

requests (not doing requests)

"when will this update/can you update fic/au?" (Blanket statement: i don't know/whenever or if i feel like it.)

ship stuff (taking a break)

salt (trying to move away from that, salty content ain't good for me)

suggestive stuff (ain't my vibe)

asks that are okay: small silly hc's, questions/comments about my content/fics/au's/amvs, good vibes, occasional check-ins and how-you-doing's (try not to do every day tho, it stresses me out to have to answer daily)

If your ask never gets answered or I delete it, please don't take it personally, I'm going through life stuff right now, so I can't answer everything or I'll burn out really fast. I'm gonna have to be picky with what I actually answer o7 I might doodle here and there if I feel it, but definitely won't be doing so for every ask. I appreciate you taking the time to read have a good one <3

#knox rambles #asks #answering asks #one of these days I'll make a FAQ and reorganize my blog but that day is not todayG;LSAKDJF #its been eighty-four years-#i did miss the choas i think so i'm excited :D !!

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tilskkarishma · 17 days

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• WELCOME •

Welcome to my corner of the internet! I'm glad you're here. 🎶

I’m a passionate musician and creator of AMVs, which you can check out on my YouTube channel. Music fuels my creativity, and I love sharing that with all of you!

I make normal music but also write music especially for Bungou Stray Dogs. I also have spotify and soundcloud:

open.spotify.com/intl-de/artist/6TT9oqSm28YyFivqfj5Nf2

https://soundcloud.com/tilsk-karishma

This is one of my AMVs, but I also did one for Fyodor, Sigma, Nikolai, Tachihara, Chuuya (also skk), Hirotsu, Mori, Fukuzawa, Kunikida, etc.

youtube

In addition to my musical adventures, I also enjoy writing (mostly in German but I have a few fanfics in english on wattpad) and have dabbled in drawing a bit during my younger years.

This is my wattpad:

I have one fanfic even here:

For those who love role play, I have a Mori Ougai (from Bungo Stray Dogs) role play blog as well as an orphanage role play blog (beast!Mori).

If you're into that, I’d love to connect! ♥

I know it’s a bit unrealistic since I seem to be the sole supporter of this ship, but if you're interested in playing Hirotsu alongside my Mori, or if you’d like to have Hirotsu for your own Mori, please feel free to reach out! T.T

For people who annoy me because they believe still the worst of Mori → read this first:

P.S.: I also said from the very beginning that it is obvious that Tanizaki and Naomi are not really siblings. I got hate for it and now it is canon...

Other things about me:

I ♥ LaCroix although I am Tremere.

My Tremere-character (Holiciana) I use in P&P:

I am a witch and Luciferian.

I love Yu-Gi-Oh! and these were the first characters I simped for in my life:

Currently, I'm simping for these two:

This space is all about fun and creativity, so everyone is welcome to join in. However, I want to make it clear that I do not tolerate hate in any form!

Let's keep this community friendly and supportive! 🌈💖

Thanks for stopping by, and I can't wait to connect with all of you! ♥

(Just a note: I find it quite strange when individuals first follow me and then send hateful messages about me being an adult. If you're afraid of me simply because I am not a kid, I kindly ask that you just leave me be. And yes, this has unfortunately happened to me before!)

#intro post #amv #youtube #Youtube

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olderthannetfic · 1 year

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Hi! So I have a rambling explanation that’s going to lead into a genuine question about making a website somewhat like a03 or finding alternatives to a site I will mention (it’s not a03 don’t worry)

I am a non/disney editor, crossover artist, amv maker and deep faker and any other term for “make videos of characters in canon or au type scenarios to music”. I’m also a fanficcer. And I remember when being wary of Anne Rice and Archie Comics and DC was a thing. A teacher, to cover his ass for an assignment of mine, taught me how to write an apology letter to a company on the offhand my hand written basically Batman fanfiction, made it’s way online or was heard about. I was in the tail end right before A03 but I am extremely grateful that the site exists. Okay. So now I need to talk about the Owl House. In season three episode special one, Luz Noceda makes an amv coming out to her mom.

Editor friends in a private discord were both happy and worried. Luz is one of us….but also Disney knows about us, to some level. Nothings happened I’ve just been stewing and I’m just worried something might hit the fan for the community given many of us use Disney media (hard not to when 80% of things put out is by them) So I’m asking how one would make a platform like A03 but for video media. Or if there’s things you know like that. YouTube is getting more and more difficult for anyone nowadays too.

Again, nothings really happened yet, I just can’t get it out of my head

Video is worlds harder than text, but you know that.

There are a couple of approaches here: First, more is more. The more sites you have your stuff on, the smaller the chance that Disney can nuke all of them. Second, if you're not just using youtube and getting good at playing the algorithm, you need some way for people to find you or to keep track of all your alternate hosting.

Vidders of the oldschool sort have taken to using AO3. It doesn't have native hosting, of course, but it provides a stable URL and useful fandom-based tagging without algorithm bullshit. It's also a decent way to get vids out there if you only have download links and no streaming (though, of course, that means fewer views). You can embed a bunch of different copies of the same thing in the same work.

I don't know of a ton of fannish attempts at video hosting that are open to everyone. The only person I can think of who's heavily working on that is the guy behind Vidders.net who has a few different projects going.

For other hosting options, I'd see what AO3 currently has whitelisted for embedding. Two obvious ones are Critical Commons and Archive.org.

Broadly, yes, fanvids and AMVs have been subject to even more disastrous mass deletions than fanfic has, and far fewer of them have been saved by other fans because video files are huge.

Oldschool AMVs in the strict sense (i.e. Japanese anime and not Disney) are catalogued and sometimes hosted on animemusicvideos.org. Oldschool Media Fandom has some vidding archivists, and really old stuff was released on tape and then disc, and people still have their copies of those. But online-only fannish video stuff from the 00s and 10s has massive gaps in the historical record already.

Disney is quiescent now, but they haven't always been, and neither have other rights holders. Worse, a bunch of hosts vidders liked just up and deleted their entire sites, wiping out eras of videos and commentary.

Your stuff is in less danger than it would have been 10 years ago, as far as anyone can tell, but video is always in massive danger of disappearing.

If you actually succeed at video!AO3, more power to you! I'm just skeptical that you'll be up to the technical and financial challenge if you don't already know more than you currently do, you know?

Hosting video has, among other problems, the issue that people trading actual abuse materials will upload their videos to your service. Hosts often play whackamole with illegal and traumatizing content. I've known people whose jobs exposed them to this shit, and they were... not okay.

I guess you could make things slightly easier on yourself if you restricted video to cartoons only, but then you'd have the same issues amvs.org does where people who start as one kind of editor start working with other footage and keep trying to upload the wrong thing.

It's often not really viable to host unless you make everyone pay and/or you're authorizing a few dozen accounts of people you've vetted, not running a service just anyone can sign up for. Hosting a hundred videos for friends that you have reviewed and know to be fanvids/amvs is a lot easier than hosting enough stuff that you can't personally review it all.

If you or anyone else is interested in trying to start a site, I'd go check out the various writings by Denise (who runs Dreamwidth). She has some twitter threads and posts on enforcement and running a platform. I remember she talked about the tech people use to detect CSAM from known law enforcement databases.

I don't want to be a downer here, but there are serious legal implications to being the actual host as opposed to just running a discord or something on someone else's platform and reporting some fucker if they try to post illegal shit.

If I were you, I'd get my buddies together, embed all our works on AO3, and then maybe make a collection or tagging standards so we could find each other's stuff.

For hosting, I'd add the Internet Archive, Vimeo, Dropbox, Google Drive, etc. to Youtube and do a periodic audit of AO3 works to make sure links were still working.

AO3 already has a lot of tags that have been made filterable, like Fanvids, AMV, Video Format: Streaming, etc.

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eshithepetty · 2 years

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hiii hiii ^_^ hiii what is your favourite mp100 amv? :D

HI HIII!!! Sorry for the late answer!! But ough... you've activated my trap card.

Honestly... and I mean truly honestly, I can't pick one. So I know that's not what this ask specifically asked, but, have just a whole list anyways sjhdgfsjdf

As per my last post, these are specifically less well known amvs, as I think pretty much everyone in this fandom knows of like, ???, 99%, Stressed Out and Kindness, for example. For these ones, I'm pretty sure none of them reach 1000 likes/notes (some don't reach even 100) (at the time of writing this, at least), but I assure you, that's not an indication of quality!! SO yeh. A pile of AMVs be upon ye (15 specifically for now).

Firstly, from Youtube:

DARK ARTS by pyrotechnicstars

youtube

Centers on: mp100 in general

This one's not as character centric as the rest of the amvs you'll see on this list, but i just Really love this one for how fluid and fun the editing is, and how the song just fits mp100's vibe very well imo ^^

maybe if i by kiwa

youtube

Centers on: Reigen

Such good cuts and scene selection :) really love when people choose a more introspective vibe with Reigen amvs. also it hit me with a surprise serirei reference that made me laugh, so hdhdhcf

All the Rowboats by hyrude

youtube

Centers on: Mob & Ritsu

The atmosphere in this one…. ough. I really appreciate when people choose to delve into the darker tones of this show, and this one really nails that !!

If I Was by ObsessiveBookworm

(@grocerystorephobic on tumblr)

youtube

Centers on: Reigen & Mob

Another introspective Reigen one! Specifically one focusing on his relationship with Shigeo. This one's really sweet,,, feels almost nostalgic in a way, really neat <3

Children's Work by ObsessiveBookworm

youtube

Centers on: Mob & Ritsu

SUCH A NEAT EXPLORATION OF THE KAGEYAMA BROTHERS…. the song fits them sooo well, its just. Augh.. Goes insane,,,,

Try To Change by Thamires

youtube

Centers on: Mob

Such a good choice of song.. I think this was one of the first mob amvs that I found and liked? Somber with a tinge of sweet at the end,,, :')

Former Lives by ObsessiveBookworm

youtube

Centers on: Mogami arc

Ooughggh;;,,, as i said, I really appreciate exploration of the darker sides to mp100, and this one is just. Augh. So well done, so gritty, so captivating despite being over a whole 6 minutes long. And I also admire it for the sheer challenge of making it, due to the length and how cut down this arc in the anime was, and how op made the best of it.. Love this one a lot…. <3

D o g T e e t h by flyweeabooty

youtube

Centers on: Mob

This one just,,, hurts…. so viscerally,,, I don't have many words for this one, just. Damn :(

With All Your Power by ObsessiveBookworm

youtube

Centers on: Season 1

The reason i'm labeling it as just season 1 is that…!! Its just!!! Such a great amv for that part of the story, with all the wackiness, the large cast of characters, the different parts going on and occasional tension and explosion of emotions…. its just sooo fun, i adore it !!!

The Whole World And Mob by ObsessiveBookworm

youtube

Centers on: Dimple & Mob

A RARE DIMPLE AMV!! And one focusing on their s1 dynamic as well! Honestly just such a silly and good time, this one genuinely makes me smile :)

....WAIT. AUGH. THERE'S A 10 VIDEO LIMIT???

...welp. Lemme take a moment then to put the other 5 in a reblog then, sorry for that jshgfjs. A brief intermission!! Watch these shrimp 'till then

#mob psycho 100 #mp100 #amv #reigen arataka #kageyama shigeo #kageyama ritsu #dimple mp100 #ekubo mp100 #ask #snorfin-here #also. yeas i am aware that 1/3 of the amvs on this list are by one person....#not my fault obsessivebookworm's such an amazing amv maker smh /lh #id in alt text #video #my own post #oh and @ grocerystoryphobic - hope the links and the tagging are ok btw!!

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thesherrinfordfacility · 1 year

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(1/5?)

so. the fall. both in general and crowley's specifically. i speculated about this quite a bit when i watched season 1 already and since, by and large, these speculations are still the basis for my thoughts now, that's also how i'll be structuring this. i'm going to go through the opinions/theories i formed based solely on the data available for season 1 first and then address new information from season 2 and how that's affected my conclusions.

a quick preface! i'm working off the assumption that go's god basically doesn't get involved in anything ever and the fall was consequently not her doing. nor do i think the metatron's heard anything more from her than anyone else has nor that he had even back then.

so the most frequent allegories of heaven i see are cult and abusive family and while i don't think that's wrong, my instinctive reaction was and still is dictatorship/surveillance state. heaven is literally the ultimate form of the divine right of kings. the metatron and the archangels cannot be removed from power because they were instated by god and their orders must be followed unfailingly because they are merely carrying out god's will. so angels starting to question god/the plan is threatening. immensely so, because the logical next leap is questioning the authority of the voice of the god and of the archangels. and sure enough that's exactly what happens! there's an uprising which turns into a war and the losing side are permanently exiled and branded as unforgivable traitors, pure evil, and any hint of something that could become dissent is cracked down on harder than ever because the archangels/the metatron can't risk anything like this emerging again. after all god isn't talking to them either and their power is very much not as divinely-ordained and unshakable as they would like.

now if there's one thing that season 2 did that was confirm my impression of heaven the dictatorship. the way gabriel is dealt with is deeply unsettling and looking at how isolated muriel is kept i'd wager there are no risks being taken that any angels could start sharing ideas again. before i thought there was an off-chance that the archangels assumed the fall was god's plan and that's why they did it but now i'm convinced it was purely political. (obviously they'd still think god intended it but i'm certain that was not the motive, that the motive was solely about staying in power. unsure what the metatron's view on god is. thoughts?) what's new from season 2 is the power dynamics at the top of the hierarchy. instead of the metatron and the archangels being a unified force on approximately equal footing, the metatron's more nefarious and more powerful than i assumed and is clearly the sole person at the very top, pulling all the strings and asserting himself as lone unassailable ruler and the archangels are infighting. gabriel's abusing his power michael's trying to usurp him and uriel's barely tolerating either of them. but while that makes for some interesting dynamics to play with i don't see how that changes anything about the fall.

wow 🦭 anon!!! firstly, please accept my humble apologies for the late-late answer to this!!! i got into a hyperfocus with an amv and then needed to make soooo many notes on what you've said so that i had a coherent response!!! 💃<- apology dance✨

anyway!!! by god im so excited to answer this; plot speculation is my favourite kind of analysis!!!

further asks and response under the cut!!!

okay so im basically just going to write up a train of thought without much coherency, incorporating both s1 and s2, so please do pop back if ive ignored something, or am missing something!!!

i completely agree with your assessment of god's involvement in the fall; following job, where i recently parsed out some thoughts on the conflicting interpretations of god's will where job, his family, and their suffering was concerned, im firmly of the opinion that god in GO is omniscient, but strictly amoral. whilst she might pull strings threaded through the universe (e.g. the knocking over of the candle in the bookshop fire is, to me, an example of this), she created and abides by free will. in her angels, in the fallen, and in humanity. I've gone over incarnations of this train of thought in #god is dead theory, if anyone fancies some extra reading.

but essentially, i can kinda see god's involvement in the fall being very similar to that of pontius pilate (depending on which account you read, to be fair) in the crucifixion of jesus, and leaving the fate of the angels that were 'rebelling' up to the 'people' - i'll come back to this. but i feel this could be a very fitting allegory insomuch of jesus being the scapegoat for humanity's sins, and dying for them to be absolved. the reconceptualisation of this in the context of the fallen is chilling, but apt (especially if anyone subscribes to some variant of the scapegoat theory - that being crowley, aziraphale, lucifer, or any combination of them. more in. #omelas/scapegoat theory tag).

bottom line for me on speculating about the fall, for me at the moment, is that god created angels. she created them to have free will, and free thought. this birthed angels starting to speak up about things they think could be different. some just wanted to make the stars live longer, some perhaps thought humanity were given too much importance, or god had too much power, altogether. i don't think god necessarily had an issue with any of this, because this was all according to how she wanted her creations to exist. but if she were to interfere in anything as an omniscient being, it would corrupt that very tenet - would influence free will, and render it obsolete.

so if god were to excuse herself, with very little - if anything - to say, it would stand to reason that her voice, the metatron, would take the metaphorical stage. now, i can see metatron's rationale going in two different directions (so far, and might be both or neither):

machiavellian (or dark triad) approach, in that he covets god's power and voice absolute for himself, to rule over heaven and its angels and wilfully disguise his own wants and desires as the word of god. and rebellious angels would threaten to upend his own authority in this regard

some kind of take on the divine command theory; specifically in ethics that morality is dictated by the command of god... ie. that something is good specifically because god commands it. DCT and voluntarism in general can be considered very flawed, (or so any ethics theory rooting in religion), for obvious reasons, but i could see this being what metatron genuinely believes. the absence of god renders him only with the great plan, and if the fall - because it's borne of free will - goes outside the scope of the plan, what other choice does he have but to eradicate evil from eden?

i find the second the most compelling of the two, but they're not mutually exclusive - metatron can still emulate machiavellian psychology and still think he's genuinely following the command of god, in good (?) conscience, in order to preserve a perfect heaven, without perhaps realising that his own free will could inform him otherwise. it would also, imo, bring back the conflict between the great and ineffable plans nicely - what is laid out by god, and what is entirely unknowable because it's literally dictated by every individual set apart from god?

moving onto heaven specifically... ive collected a lot of thoughts over the last 48h or so. first, mainly, that i agree with you in how to view heaven analogically; maybe it's because my experience in life has been very different to lots of others in the fandom, but my take on heaven is principally that of a police state, and what we're looking at is the institution itself. imo, there's a lot of shared characteristics between heaven and most kind of policing agencies, right down to the things that inherently open them up to corruption and resistance.

i hadn't thought to look at heaven in the view of divine right of kings, but this is very interesting. in at least one sense, yep - could view the metatron as being the defacto heavenly sovereign, and decreeing with power absolute. and given the reference to 1650 in s2 (and im personally hoping this might be a flashback in s3), this could potentially be a very powerful mirror (ie. charles I and cromwell during the english civil wars). for some reason however, this dynamic doesn't ring completely true for me - not quite sure why yet, but i'll probably come back to it.

the manner in which gabriel, and potentially muriel, have been dealt with in heaven is also unsettling. but i think personally for me, regardless of the political structure of heaven, what unnerves me is that it is potentially a facsimile of falling, but not in the way the narrative has so far posed it. hell are short-staffed - irrespective of why, we know this is an issue. but heaven seems to have a consistency in their numbers, inferred by the same problem never being mentioned in relation to angels. and then consider that gabriel at the very least is a powerful archangel; whyever would heaven allow gabriel to fall into hell, and work for them? no, it is safer to wipe his memory, and reduce him to what we can surmise is a very, very low rank of angel occupation/choir. is this the new falling? is this what happened to the fallen? i think there's something there.

now the thing is, thinking more on the fall has made me confront something. as much as their actions as thus shown to the audience so far are deplorable, the archangels are eminently empathetic in the context of the fall, and how they act afterwards. if we look at them considering that, what we consider to be, free will is in fact radical thought, is dangerous, and that acting on that will bring heaven down... well, it's actually somewhat understandable how they regard aziraphale.

let's take gabriel and how he speaks to crowley-as-aziraphale in s1: this is, to gabriel, an angel that has upset the great plan. literally stopped it in its tracks. is, to his mind, working directly against the word and will of god. a radical, gone native, and turned to rebellion. wouldn't gabriel be frightened out of his little head? of course he would! presumably he had to go through the fall too, watch as (we could hypothesise) his brothers (gn) fell to hell, and have to turn against them as traitors and dissidents. so, to watch as aziraphale presumably treads the same path must be terrifying, because of what it could precipitate. beelzebub in s1 even said it at aziraphale-as-crowley's execution, "it'll cause a riot!". and that's in hell - now imagine heaven.

we know that archangels are capable of change. we saw in job them have - if not a camaraderie - a cordial (albeit still quite condescending) relationship with aziraphale. this appears to deteriorate the longer that aziraphale is on earth, and his path diverges away from theirs. but we also see gabriel, fully as gabriel, fall in love with beelzebub. they are capable of it - and capable of free will.

all of this to say that i don't think it's conclusive at this time to implicate the archangels in what, as the hypothesis above indicates, is entirely metatron's doing. bear in mind that despite the recent trial, uriel and michael don't even recognise metatron. this could be memory wipe, or could be that despite how it's physically shown to us metatron in heaven as a floating head and metatron in human form are not recognisable... that being said, a) aziraphale doesn't recognise him either, despite seeing his head in s1, and b) metatron says, "you don't know me?!", which could either be a test, or as genuine incredulity that they don't remember the mf metatron. the whole thing, as LWA has pointed out on a couple of occasions now, reeks of the nuremberg defense ('just following orders'), and whilst it's unjustifiable, it's certainly understandable.

in any case, i think it has the potential to inform very heavily on the current inter-archangel dynamic in heaven - who trusts whom? who next will challenge god? who is hungry for power, and to bring down heaven? when you specifically consider uriel's disdain of michael assuming the post of supreme archangel, it could be jealousy or just out of pettiness, but michael doing so must suggest a degree of instability and concern too. it might not necessarily change anything about the fall retrospectively, but it does inform on how they punish angels, that step out of line, in a post-fall era.

re: the specifics of crowley's fall (and me bearing in mind the length of this answer!), i agree on pretty much every point you raised, each conclusion - ive covered similar thoughts in various tags: #AWCW spec, #the fall/the great war spec, and #scapegoat/omelas theory. one thing on whether AWCW fought in the great war; i agree, i don't think he fought. but i definitely think he was present. being fanciful, i think he might have hid, or someone 👀 attempted to help him hide, and get him out of heaven without bloodshed, or without violence ("sauntered vaguely downwards"). i don't think it succeeded, and i think potentially both were brought as traitors before heaven... and here is where i cycle back to the scapegoat/omelas theory.

and in any case - im not convinced that either of them, or indeed anyone(?) fully remembers the fall. it would make sense, from metatron's perspective, to wipe all seeds of rebellious thought (without accounting for the fact that they're born of free will, which cannot be erased) from all involved parties in heaven with a targeted memory wipe. as for the fallen - i think that's literally part of their having fallen; they can't remember specifics about their time as angels, or at least the specifics of why they fell. this would potentially be explanatory for crowley's tendency as an unreliable narrator as concerns his fall in particular. the one thing i do trust in particular as to his potential part in the fall is AWCW's line: "if i were in charge..." - take into account what ive said above, plus this kind of thinking being a very innocent but parallel to what we can assume lucifer's personal beef was, i think the origins of crowley's fall - and what his questions threatened - is relatively clear.

i know you've brought up other things too, 🦭 anon, but i wonder if this is something we can explore in further depth in another post? i feel this essay is enough to be getting on with for now, and would love to know your thoughts!!! again, really sorry for the delay, but hope this makes up for it!!!✨💕

note to self - topics left to look at! AWCW rank, and gabriel's first order archangel line, and his line as jim re: "all the morning stars..."

update: fuck it 🦭 anon, i was turning these topics over in my brain like a rotisserie chicken for most of the evening, so let's dig in anyway!!!✨

okay look, i'll admit (and as is clearly evident in my old posts), i was an advocate of the crowley is lucifer theory. obviously neil debunked this, no worries, glad to have nipped that in the bud. but i am still fairly convinced that crowley is going to own a lucifer-ish narrative as concerns his fall. if we go by hell hierarchy in GO and correlate this against influential material (scripture, and yes okay Milton), we can be fairly certain that lucifer led on the fall, fell first and became satan, beelzebub was a key part (to warrant being prince of hell), and that crowley got himself caught up with them at some point before falling himself. this is a part of crowley's recount of his fall that i do believe, but i think he massively downplays his part.

i think AWCW comes across a group of angels that do not rebuke him for having questions, and even talk to him about them, encouraging him. i think he feels safe with them, and becomes pals with them, and they end up sweeping him along in more 'dangerous', 'rebellious' thought... and right up until the moment they get caught/lucifer starts speaking out, i don't think AWCW realises the shit he's gotten himself into (or maybe he does, but it's easier to sink down rather than swim up). in any case, he's surely going to be implicated in instigated rebellion among the angels, and be punished accordingly.

now im not entirely sure on the specifics of a potential scapegoat allegory would come in here, but i do think it does (and history will potentially repeat itself in s3, given the promo images). i think perhaps lucifer and the gang start to panic, panic at the concept of falling (regardless of who is dolling out the sentence, god or metatron), and they pin the blame on AWCW. he started asking questions first, he caused all of this. i think that's potentially why metatron has such beef, and specifically refers to crowley "always asking damn-fool questions", plus throws him the Dirty Look - all of this mess, and everyone believes crowley started it, even if he didn't pull the trigger. obviously lucifer and all the fallen get similarly punished, so crowley doesn't carry the full weight of the fall, but that would potentially be a big chunk of his character core that once realised could make a lot of things about him suddenly make sense.

(as an aside, i do perhaps think that aziraphale is also implicated in here somewhere - ive explored it in the #scapegoat theory tag more - but do also equally wonder if crowley is posed as the scapegoat for the fall, and aziraphale will be posed as the scapegoat for the last judgement? interesting mirroring to hypothesise).

in terms of crowley's rank... sigh. i get the narrative and character potential of it, but... i don't think he was a Very Important Angel, however that might look. at the very least, i hope not. i got a few reasons for this, first of them being that i think it could be quite cliché, to the point of being a bit reductive. he is very obviously, in a rather on-the-nose fashion, painted as being an archangel in s2; for this reason alone, i get the feeling that this will in fact not be the case. (and im not an expert on pratchett, far from it, but my understanding is that a lot of his themes work with the concept of being "ordinary" which... this theory would arguably shoot out of the park).

we know that crowley is at least in the throne or dominion choir. the way that muriel says these ranks 'or above' suggests that they are on the same rank, not throne-above-dominion as strict christian angelology suggests. neil and terry turned this structure on its head anyway with the specific archangel structure, but i think it's far that the basic blueprint of GO!angelology follows the same outline. which suggests that crowley can only have been these ranks, or a cherub, seraph, or archangel.

i dont think he was a high archangel on the same plane as michael and uriel, let alone gabriel. i did suggest (in #AWCW spec, i think) that he might have been a lesser archangel like sandalphon or saraqael, and this still rings true for me if you cross-reference heaven hierarchy against hell hierarchy (there's obviously a lot to contradict this copy-and-paste, but im just talking in the vague sense). the other thought i have, is that i don't necessarily think that crowley's power is borne out of having been an archangel; i think it's literally borne out of having an imagination, as was intimated in s1, and i don't necessarily trust his "how did you know i didn't do it?" line to shax; we know that shax is not the sharpest of demons in this respect. as for the miracle he and aziraphale performed - i don't think the reason why it was so powerful has anything to do with either of them, and all to do with jim (#25 lazarii theory).

moving onto "first order archangel", im still not quite sure what to make of it, but... i dont think it was intimating anything beyond reasserting gabriel's rank as the top archangel. the supreme archangel position seems to be just that - a position, a role - but one that elevates already existing power (and i think that's what's indicated by the purple eyes, personally - having, to a degree, some of the power of literal god), and thus raising you to the tier (?) of first order. fundamentally, without the SA position and therefore without the FO rank, i dont think gabriel is actually any different to michael or uriel; they're all archangels, and it's just a question of promotion. in which case, i personally think gabriel was just being sarcastic and childish, and simply reinstating "hey, im the top dog here, im the only one at my level, so what i say goes'. it feels like a very gabriel thing to do and say, imo.

i'll be honest; im coming up empty on the elevator scene, but if we're talking about missing furniture - the scene before is crowley walking out of muriel's 'office' with muriel and saraqael, and then bang we're in the elevator with them all as well as michael and uriel. there's a whole, obviously interesting, conversation missing there, and i dont think that's inconsequential... potentially.

okay last bit and then i'll definitely be done!!!✨ "morning stars" - so i obviously can't say all of the above and then based on this be like 'okay yeah there were multiple lucifer-type characters' because, honestly, i think that might be a bit far-fetched. there are a lot of astronomical, mythological, and biblic references to 'morning star', and 'light/dawn-bringer' but none that, at the moment, seem to fit for me. so instead, i return to jim.

as i say in my #25 lazarii theory posts, i think when we look at jim, we're somehow looking at the shell of gabriel, but also a fragment of god. not sure how she got in there, but to me the whole fly/huge miracle/jim makes that ring true for me. so, when referencing the morning stars, i think god (who let's face it, appears to be talking at that point in ep2) is literally talking about the beginning, where on the first day, god created 'day', and specifically 'morning' and 'evening', and in wider context the heavens and the earth (genesis 1:5, KJV) - so morning stars... might just be morning stars?✨

#not proof read - pretend you do not Perceive The Errors #good omens #ask #heaven theory #metatron spec #AWCW spec #pre-fall aziraphale spec #memory wipe theory #s2 meta #s3 narrative spec #scapegoat theory #the fall/the great war spec #god is dead theory #fuck it All The Tags

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