my shy girlfriend
summary - you don’t believe you’re good enough when Harry first approaches you
college!au
warnings: self deprecation, lots of fluff, anxiety, (requested by nov)
word count: 2k
In retrospect, it probably wasn’t a brilliant idea to go to a raging house party with anxiety and yet here you were.
Stuck between a girl on your course that you were barely friends with and her boyfriend. She had roped you into coming to the event by selling it as a ‘little get together’ - which even that nearly made you have a panic attack. This was not a little get together, however, this was a bustling house party with loud music and even louder guests.
A nervous breakdown was on its way.
“What do you want to drink Y/N?” Vivienne, the girl on your course, shouted at you from less than a metre away.
It made you jump, her voice, along with someone knocking into you too. This whole place just wasn’t your scene and it was taking everything inside of you to not let the tears run free.
Your timid eyes ran across the room, looking for the nearest exit. You couldn’t even recognise a door entrance there were that many people in here. Sweaty bodies clung to each other and the smell of the room was worse than a boys changing room at school.
Vivienne must’ve given up on trying to get you a drink because you heard her scoff and walk off before you could even turn to look at her.
“Oh...” You said quietly to yourself, your hands playing with each other in front of your body. It was a nervous habit of yours when you found yourself in uncomfortable situations.
Another look around the room and you noticed a guy looking your way. He looked different to the others guys in the room - more mellow; softer. He looked like he belonged in this environment, but could also look good in a library or café too.
And he was pretty.
He had soft brown hair, with one or two bouncing curls. Big, green, eyes that were looking directly your way. His baby blue sweater gave away his softer side and it made you blush thinking about.
He smiled. A charming smile at that. It lifted some of the anxiety off your chest immediately. So, you smiled back - only being polite of course.
You were unsure of what to do next. It was a room full of sweaty, drunk, strangers and yet there was this electric pull between you and this guy. Your heart wanted to pull you forwards toward him until you were toe-to-toe, but your body made no effort to follow suit.
It was a twinkle in his eye that made your body lean forward, ever so slightly, with the intention of moving closer.
“Excuse me.” A girl pushed past you, bumping you out of the way and into someone else.
“Oh, i’m so sorry.” You said quickly.
Now that you’d lost eye contact with that guy you were instantly reminded of where you were. The room seemed smaller than before and you felt lonelier than ever. Gulping down the stone feeling in your throat helped shy away the forthcoming tears.
You had to get out of here.
As you politely asked a guy - more like a brick wall - to move out of the way, you snuck a quick glance back in that guys direction and realised he was chatting to the girls that had rudely budged passed you.
One look at the girl talking to the dreamy guy and it made you feel foolish for ever thinking he was even looking your way. He was clearly smiling at them girls, who’d been behind you. Your heart sunk for ever thinking that you’d be worth a second glance at from a guy like that. It would be a miracle if someone that pretty and charming could ever give you a smile that golden.
The girl with him was beautiful too. Hair you only wished you could have. A figure that you’d never achieve no matter how hard you tried. She looked poster model worthy and even though not a single person was looking at you, you suddenly felt self conscious.
You just wanted out.
Squeezing through the hot and sticky bodies was both gross and difficult, but once you were out of the front door you could finally breathe.
Letting out a shaky breathe, you rubbed your hands up and down your arms to try and warm yourself up and headed towards the bus stop. You’d have to try and figure out which bus to get, since you’d never used them before. Vivienne’s boyfriend had given you a lift, but you presumed that you’d never see her again after tonight. You may be shy, but you also knew when to not let a person walk all over you.
Sitting down at the bus stop you were alone.
You checked the bus timetable on your phone and tried to cross reference the time with the bus schedule. It was difficult to understand and your shaky hands made your phone to difficult to see anyways.
“C’mon Y/N.” You whispered under your breathe, trying to figure it out. Eyes watering made it even more difficult to see.
If you caught the 86 and then made the transfer to the 75…
“The buses don’t run at this time of night.”
You turned around to see baby blue sweater guy. You sniffled and tried to work out what to say next, only he did for you.
“Where abouts do you live?” He asked, his voice so silky like honey, “Don’t worry, I’m not a creep. I live at Melbourne. I go to the St. Andreas college. I’m Harry.”
He was rambling. It made you calmer the fact that he was rambling.
“Y/N.”
“Nice to meet you, Y/N.” Harry smiled a half smile, his eyes sparkling like they did before only this time they were just for your viewing pleasure. “I, uh.. I saw you at the house party.” He pointed back to the house.
“You did?” Your eyebrows furrowed with confusion.
“Yeah, um, i’m pretty sure I smiled at you and you smiled at me, like, at least I think that was you?” Harry scratched his neck awkwardly like this conversation was not going the way he’d intended.
“O-oh. I thought you were looking at your girlfriend, sorry.” You blushed, confused.
“My girlfriend?”
“The one that um..”
“The one that pushed past you?” He asked and you nodded embarrassed. “Oh, yeah no. Definitely not my girlfriend.”
“Oh sorry. I didn’t mean to—”
“No really it’s fine—”
“I jus thought she—.”
“No.”
You nodded your head awkwardly as the conversation closed, before dropping your gaze to the floor and pretended like it was so very interesting.
Harry twisted his head from side to side to scope the surroundings, not seeing anyone and only hearing the muffled sounds of thumping music from the house.
“So…” He awkwardly said.
“I’m going to…” You pointed in the direction behind you, curtly smiling at him before you started to walk.
You had google maps up on your phone and sighed when you saw it was a 30 minute walk home, but there was no other way of getting home now. One foot in front of the other was how it was going to be.
It was a surprise when you felt Harry by your side within seconds again.
You looked up at him with a confused smile.
“I just have this weird feeling that i’ll regret everything in my life if I don’t walk you home tonight.”
And your heart smiled.
“Are you superstitious?” You asked, looking down at your legs which you realised were walking in sync. It was as if you’d walked together for years.
“I don’t think so?” Harry laughed quietly, looking down at your legs too and noticing the same thing as you did. “I just think I would’ve regretted not making an excuse to get to talk to you.”
“Talk to me?” You turned your head to view that he was already looking over your profile, smiling ever-so-slightly more now that he could see your entire face.
“Yes you.” He chuckled.
“Why me? I-is this some part of an elaborate plan to embarrass—”
Your heart started to race and goosebumps started to rise at the thought that this was just a joke. Harry stopped you before you could spiral.
“Hey, no, no. Y/N, hey, look at me please?” He asked softly asked and it would’ve been rude to turn him down. “This isn’t a joke. Or a plan. Or an evil scheme. This is just me, walking you home and talking to you because I might, well, um… Because I like you and want to get to know more of you.”
You looked deeper into his eyes to try and assess his genuineness, before coming to a conclusion.
“I go to St Andreas college too, but I dorm in Devonshire.”
“That’s at least, uh, 35 minutes away from here by foot.” Harry looked at his watch, before turning to smile at you. “Perfect to get to know about you and your favourite colour.”
You smiled back.
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