#nothing specific really caused me to post this i just like thinking about this stuff haha

[fallenrain40]

labels are optional btw. i've seen some people complain about microlabels and how they are confusing, unnecessary, but the thing is. those labels are OPTIONAL. the people who use microlabels are using them because they feel that's what works best for them. you don't have to use any label you don't want, even if it's description technically matches you. that's why things like ace and aro are spectrums. you could use a microlabel, or if you feel it works better to just call yourself ace/aro, or simply aspec, there's options. and you don't even have to use any of them if you don't want. you can go unlabeled. it's all up to you what you want to use for yourself. nobody is forcing you to use a label you don't want. that's literally the opposite of what we want htgfsdsf

my point is, if microlabels don't work for you, then just don't use them. don't start trying to invalidate others who do use them. microlabels exist so you have more options.

[deepseawave]

obsessed w the tags on ur last reblog

Omgg, thank you haha, it was a quality post so I just had to appreciate it in full force 😂❤️

Can‘t believe someone would actually enjoy my yapping :,D

[defiant-firefly]

(I've had my chatty medicines so you get a post about this)

There is something distinctly and uniquely alienating and bizarre about hearing people say 'Easter Sunday is the most religious day of the year'. Like, when was this?? If it's so religious and so so so important, how come no one thought to tell me it was religious until like four or five years ago?

Yeah it's kinda funny but I'm also sat there every time like "what the fuck are you talking about". The assumption I was raised Christian and am Christian via culture is really funny though cause like. Bro I have no fucking clue what any of this stuff is about.

My parents never taught me the majority of this shit. Anyone else assumed I already knew about it. This Easter talk I've been hearing about a weird amount more than normal is all new to me and making me think of all this shit lmao

[erinwantstowrite]

Halloween AU!!!

hey so. i put SOOOOO much effort into this au and for what? at least it ended up looking cool? anyways Halloween is my favorite holiday and i just HAD to make something for them!

i had a LOT of ideas for what everyone would be, but i really wanted to stick to a certain theme cause it's based around Halloween. i knew i had to have a vampire, werewolf, and a witch. cause like... obviously. iconic Halloween stuff!! but i took some liberties with everyone else and i think they turned out pretty cool!!

Jason was originally a fox shifter (which i still love and might draw art for some day) but i went with a bear in the end. is that because i thought about tiny bear cub Jaybin and wanted to cry? yeah. yeah it is. i KNEW Steph was going to be my werewolf though i started doubting myself when i went to draw her. turned out to be my favorite drawing on here which makes sense cause she is my light my love my daughter my will to live and all that jazz

Tim was actually gonna be a harpy but thank god i didn't go for that in the end. Duke was the one that was a bitch and a half trying to figure out BUT!! comments on the post asking what y'all thought led me towards Psychic so THANK YOUUUU everybody that commented!! (specifically those who thought of ghost!! Duke and Tim ended up being a perfect duo in this au)

Babs was pretty easy to figure out what I wanted for her. I read somewhere that they are seen as protectors of forests/ are considered spiritual authority figures and also.... she looks cool as fuck. Did not expect how easy it was to find a ref for a deer in a wheelchair though? I can never find the right hand or face angle reference but that was super easy???

For Bruce there was literally no question he HAD to be human. it's literally so funny that everyone who knows Batman thinks he's a spooky vampire but he's human. his first son, however?????? THAT'S the vampire. I knew Dick had to be a vampire too. A little nod towards that one comic run but in my au nothing bad happens ever 🥰 Damian also being a bat shifter is very on purpose because how funny is it that he's a bat man. Literally not a single person in the League thinks that Bruce is telling the truth about being human. Bruce you are NOT beating the secretly a vampire allegations.

adding in Jay's hilarious joke it's so fucking funny:

Alfred is actually a demon. I CAN NOT remember who made this post so if someone can help me find it, it would be appreciated!! because this was inspired by them!!! but somewhere i saw someone talk about Alfred being a demon that Thomas and Martha made a deal with (i think it was for an au idea?) and I just HAD to put it here. Alfred looks so human and everyone expects it, but he's definitely not. I put the ??? because it's so fucking funny. see if you can spot the 1 hint i put on his drawing that something is amiss!!

Peter is from an alternate dimension still, but it is not a world of creatures like him, it's just the same as LoF canon except Peter grew some extra limbs and eyes. He finds that it's actually pretty easy to fit in with the Waynes. Hard to feel like a freak when a guy can turn into a fucking bear, or your dad is a vampire, and the teenagers in the family are trying to summon ghosts or make potions.

additional doodles for this au:

i am still debating whether i am going to draw something for this au or write a oneshot, but i DO want to do something with these for Halloween

[tuffdwightwest]

Doey x Player

First of all I don't really ship any of the x Poppy Angels ships. Cause frankly I'm asexual and I find I can't personally seperate myself enough from the player character yet. I wanted to make this cause I was seeing a lot of frankly cruel call out posts.

This is not pedophilia. Or disgusting.

The idea that Doey and the other toys don't age is a headcanon. To assume your headcanon is correct and then demonize others. Is put simply wrong. This isn't FNAF they aren't children souls. Their organs are literally taken out and placed into another body. The whole point is that they are 'living' toys.

You are fine to have that headcanon though. But you should not use it to attack others.

For Doey specifically I see people call out his mental breakdown at the end of the game. As evidence that he's 'still a child'. This however is not evidence. It is a mental breakdown from someone who has something almost similar to DID(obviously a more sci-fi version but the closest irl thing I can compare it too). In his breakdown he wasn't even making any sense. Repeating lines we've heard him say over the years. Crying out that he wants to go home.

These are all normal things that can happen in a mental breakdown. Actually learn about trauma triggers and read stuff about it. Doey regressing and just letting Kevin's anger take over is pretty normal for someone who just went through as much trauma as he did.

Besides this point though people say he talks like a child. And I really want to understand where. Throughout the story he seems very rational and reasonable. Even the brief moments that Kevin and what I assume Jack takes over.

Even Doey's last tape before the end of the game. He's scared there but seems like someone just trying to figure out what to do. Nothing about it made me think he's a child.

All this aside, I want to use this just for people to realize. The "they don't age" is a headcanon. They need to eat, sleep, etc. So why do you believe they don't age? This doubling down on this headcanon especially using his breakdown as evidence just seems ableist. Cause I've seen other people not even myself try to explain to others that using that evidence point is ableist.

I doubt this would change those in that echo Chambers mind. But for others that just never really thought about it. I hope this just makes you realize. Yeah either version is just a headcanon. And neither is Canon at the moment. What we do know for sure is that at least 10 years has passed since the hour of Joy. And Doey was made before that. Long enough to witness the guards making toys fight, to be through plenty of interviews, etc.

So by evidence of just time itself. He'd be like at the least 18-25(with the assumption Jack was 8 when he fell into the dough). And this is actually a low estimate cause it assumes that the hour of joy happens soon after he is created.

Stop calling people pedophiles over a headcanon and frankly pretty tame ship. Like ya'll scream about this one then turn around and praise the doctor one. When Doctor is clearly a sadistic childkilling monster. But you give that one a pass. Yet get upset at people when they want to date like the one person in the game that was genuinely kind and a protector.

Stop attacking other people over headcanons. You can debate them but pedophile should not be flung around at all.

Thank you for listening to my rant.

[olderthannetfic]

Hi OTNF and everyone,

I am finding that it's harder and harder and harder to get into anything - book, show, movie... most things seem, you know, to just not be doing it for me, be it fanfic or original stuff.

In part, I think, it's a general restlessness and that it's become harder to give anything enough time to get into the stories, the characters, the settings, the narrative voices... I guess you can call it attention deficit on my part, just a need for stories to deliver those sweet, sweet hits quickly, but they're not.

I'm not currently ficcing but I did for years (might again in the future, who knows), and it's made reading, specifically, harder. It's like I've become more aware of what goes on behind the scene, I guess? I feel like I can see the writer giving up on a sentence, skipping a scene because fuck this, trying hard to not repeat a word although it's the only one that fits, etc.

Or maybe it's just the *everything* around us in the world that is weighing on me too much? I could say it's adult life, but then again I have more free time than most (and boy do I need hours of doing nothing to survive the other hours), and no family/partner (all that would put even more pressure on me): what is wrong, to make everything so UGHHH?

I feel like I'm stuck in a rut with a brain moaning feed me, feeeed me, and whatever I try to give it, it spits everything out. (Yes, I've tried hobbies, and nothing sticks there either. I've never really found rewards or satisfaction there, so...)

Decades ago as a kid, I was a voracious reader, although studying literature took the pleasure of it away from me. It took time and discovering fanfic that brought me back to reading, but at the time the internet was starting to be a thing, too, and it can't have helped the attention thing. AFAIK I'm not ADHD but then again, I couldn't get a proper diagnosis (the therapists I saw were either dismissive or just about The Talking, which was pointless for me).

I just wonder how it all disappeared, you know? Sometimes I find something that catches my attention for a while - a book (but I read quite quickly when motivated), a fandom... but it's been a while now, and it's just so frustrating! When is it going to come back? Will it ever? *gulp*

I know that books were escapism when I was a child, and then fandom was escapism, but at the moment I find myself grabbing at air and my empty hands are mocking me. Give me my escapism baaaaack!

So, uh. Anyone here with me?

--

Yes.

I felt like that during part of lockdown. Anhedonia is common in those kinds of circumstances.

Getting your mojo back is certainly possible, but you may need to go see a professional about depression and have some chemical assistance (yes, even if you don't feel sad per se), or you may need to change your lifestyle to one that doesn't have the thing causing you to need eleventy billion hours of downtime.

Aside from serious interventions like that, you can consider a social media detox. Remove every source of doomscrolling and time wasting of that type. When the attention span is zero and nothing brings joy, the tiny and useless hits from finishing a game of solitaire or seeing one more instagram post become very attractive. This is a trap. It will suck what little energy and joy you have and make your muscles flabby for the work of getting into an in-depth book/hobby/experience.

I know the feeling of being able to see how the sausage is made, but... well... first, being in a better mental state will make that matter less, and second, reading prose that is more competent will make that less of an issue. A lot of mainstream tradpub genre fiction is not, in my opinion, very well written these days. Obviously, people are still enjoying it, and that's fine, but if you're noticing writers fumbling around, it might be time to check out some literary fiction or some other category known more for prose quality than anything else.

It's also important to have some structure and some things to look forward to. Even if you feel tired, overwhelmed, and busy, sometimes, the answer is to do more... But it must be things that are distinct and significant and that get you off of the couch, like going to one museum every weekend.

I saw some advice once about this kind of thing that phrased it as "One big adventure; one small adventure."

Every week, you should have those two things to look forward to that matter. Check out a new coffee shop. That could be the small one. Go to an event: a gallery opening, a concert, whatever.

Physical exercise and doing some things that aren't as verbal and conscious thought-involving is important too. Painting is a better hobby for zoning out than writing is. Taking long walks in nature is good for most people.

--

The kind of intense, obsessive love I had for reading as a child and that I sometimes have for fandom requires a lot of attention and some time. It's escapist, but that masks how much work it actually was. It didn't feel like work only because we were in training.

If you've filled your brain and your day up with a thousand petty annoyances or minor and useless attempts to feel something, you won't have the capacity for those deeper things.

Because you are already at a point that's equivalent to a bad sprained ankle, trying to get back to running right now won't work. You have to stay off of the ankle for a bit, then build your strength and stamina back up.

[sir-myst-cake]

First post on here and it's a rant!! If you want more cool takes you should totally follow me as I'll be posting here more often and have totally cool art to share‼️‼️

I'm not completely sure how to tag this? I'm talking about the ships in a positive light so I think it's okay, and besides, I want lots of peeps to see it, I'm aware I probably won't change many people's minds at all, but it's okay lol, I just want Anti's to see they genuinely have a nothing burger and need to leave people alone.

This is a mostly TikTok only problem regarding Beast x Ancient's (thank god) but I've seen my fair share elsewhere like on here. So lemme counter every argument I've seen so far cause you got a lot of time on your hands to be telling people to off themselves over Cookie ships 😭 put that hate into people who actually deserve it.

BILLFORD COMPARISON

Regarding ShadowVanilla specifically, people have compared the ship a lot from both sides, but what really got me is what I've seen here:

"Shadow Milk Cookie is way worse than Bill! He drove Pure Vanilla to insanity! He tortured him!"- This is in regards to how people bring up the fact Anti's are fine with one thing but not the other when it's basically the same thing they're against. Psychological, physical, mental, and emotional torture. I'll be honest I haven't watched Gravity Falls whatsoever, but my friend has, and from what she says, yeah Bill is the definition of a cruel and unusual punishment. He's done some crazy things, absolutely heinous, might even be a little worse than Shadow Milk or on the same level, either way though-

You can't like one thing and then not the other, it's different flavors of the same thing, it's hypocritical. Either you hate them both or you hate neither.

"Those are 2 different fandoms!"- Doesn't matter, it's the same thing, just different media, it's not different whatsoever aside from the universe, there's much torture involved on both ends.

ABUSER X VICTIM

This one I've seen A LOT and I'm just ??

"If you ship Beast x Ancient's you support Abuser x victim btw"- That's a STRETCH. You are reaching FAR. Nobody is romanticizing the abuse, nobody is normalizing it, it's stuff that happened in canon and we acknowledge it but nobody is doing any of that other stuff. I'm not condoning anyone in real life to do that shit lol. It's called exploring, they have an interesting dynamic, romantic or platonic, two sides of the same coin. You can say the same thing about horror movies, they put a lot of disturbing stuff in there. Do the movie producers CONDONE any of that stuff? Obviously not. Goes for Devsisters too, they don't condone body mutilation yet they still made Burning Spice rip off Cheese's wings.

But even so, for the people who DO like it for the angst, I won't say fiction doesn't affect reality because it does in many cases, but this isn't one of them. Not every relationship is going to be peachy and perfect, just like in real life. I can give an example on this one too actually.

GoldenLily, they aren't condoning what Lily (technically) did to Golden Cheese's kingdom, but they like it for all the potential, complicated feelings and emotions that come along with it.

Also, that's basically the same thing with Beasts x Ancients, just turn it around to enemies to lovers.

"This isn't Villain x hero, this is abuser x victim"- Are you saying MOST of media is abuser x victim then? This is in fact a typical hero x Villain trope, it's nothing new. Respectfully, you guys freak out when a Villain does villain stuff, I'd be surprised if there was a villain who DIDN'T cause any trauma for the opposing party. But according to this logic, media is just dead, no more fanfiction, no more what ifs, no more content since it's all apparently problematic and not canon. Even if somebody switches stuff up in an AU, and makes things completely fluffy, that's apparently still not enough.

"oh you had to make an AU to ship them because you know it's toxic"- No, it's just playing around with scenarios. Learn to separate fanon from canon. This specifically goes for the redeemed AU's I see of the Beasts, people still complain, they act as if people can't change. One of the biggest examples I have of that is FlutterCord, Discord did plenty of messed up things, but in the end, he still managed to change. You'll still get burned at the stake for it though.

"You must be an abuser yourself to condone this!!"- Extremely disrespectful and a WILDDD take. Need I say more??

"I ship Beast x Beast rather than Beast x Ancient's"- According to your logic, the Beasts are abusers right? And if we followed the same story, they are not mentally well whatsoever. You'd rather ship 2 dangerously mentally unstable characters together who'd just make each other worse? Destroy each other? Fuck each other up beyond belief? It doesn't make sense does it, nor is it fair for y'all to praise these ships but hate on the others. You like watching the cookies crumble huh 😭

CANON

"The ship isn't canon!"- We know that, everyone should know that. With what I said earlier, please learn to separate fanon from canon. That's what a fandom is, we do non-canon stuff, it's very fun, you should try it.

"It's a Proship/Dark ship!"- Going the canon route, Beasts are Eons old, Ancients are thousands of years old. Big gap yes, but nonetheless all of them are old as fuck. Older than bloodlines. Treating the Ancients as if they aren't grown adults. You're intentionally trying to make it weird. Stop calling ships you don't like proships please.

Also a little off topic but please don't listen to everyone you interact with on TikTok?? I remember one time I was scrolling through a comment section and saw somebody say "Doesn't Mystic Flour Cookie hate Burning Spice Cookie?" On a MysticSpice vid, looked in the replies, somebody asked for proof/where it was implied, and they didn't answer 💀 just blatantly spreading misinformation. Sources around you are way more reliable than people who don't back up their claims.

CONCLUSION

Even despite all this, you still have the right to feel how you wanna feel. Just please stop harassing people for simple stuff like this, in all honesty, I feel like it's more about seeing one of your favorite characters shipped with somebody who hurt them in canon that makes peeps upset. Which I can totally understand because I used to be exactly like that, I LIVEEEE for Dark Cacao Cookie, when Mystic Flour's update came out, I wanted her dead. Quite literally blocked someone because I couldn't stand seeing their MysticCao art. Hated what she did to my baby boy fr.

But then It started growing on me, over time, I just realized it was never that serious.

Even so, notice how I still didn't go out of my way to harass said person about it because I specifically didn't like it? It really is that easy. Block and go about your day.

I also suspect this because of stuff like this 💀

Love that person who replied, but it's not that hard y'all. We all can in fact, get along.

ANYWAYSSSS thanks to those who took the time read, I love you my pookies hope you have a good day or night💕💕

[cosmerelists]

How Kaladin Would Flirt With Other Cosmere Characters

As requested by @cam-ulu29 :)

Hot off the back of my post about other characters flirting with Kaladin, cam-ulu29 asked if I could also write about Kaladin being the big flirt with other characters. So let's just say that Kaladin had the ability & the desire to flirt...how might he do so?

1. Lyn

Kaladin: I'm glad that there are women Windrunners now. Lyn: Man, me too! Kaladin: And specifically I am glad that you. A woman. And a Windrunner. Are here. Lyn: Awww, thanks! Kaladin (visibly sweating): Yes you. As a woman. Who is a Windrunner. And is here. Lyn: Are you...are you having a stroke right now?

2. Renarin

Kaladin: Hey, Renarin...back when you first joined Bridge 4, did you have a crush on me? Renarin: ! Renarin: W-Was it obvious? Kaladin: N-No, not really! Syl told me. Later. That she thought you did. Renarin: Oh... Kaladin: ... Kaladin: Any chance you still do?

3. Leswhi

Kaladin: Hey, uh, Leshwi? I was wondering if you would be free for an honorable duel, maybe Tuesday night? Leshwi: Certainly. I will assemble the shanay-im. Kaladin: Oh, well, I was actually thinking of an honorable duel with just you and me, you know? Syl: And me! Kaladin: And also Syl. Leswhi: ... Leshwi: Tuesday you said? It's a date.

4. Rlain

Kaladin: Ugh, all these women keep coming to the clinic to flirt with me. Kaladin: I can't get any work done! Kaladin: I bet if they knew I was in a relationship already, they'd stop. Kaladin: Hey Rlain...do you want to hold hands? Rlain: ...Are you asking me to pretend to be your boyfriend? Kaladin: Pretend?

5. Laral

Kaladin: Crazy how we're both single now. Laral: ... Laral: You mean because you got dumped and my husband DIED? Kaladin: Uh... Laral: ... Kaladin: So...not the right moment to see if you want to get a drink and catch up? Laral: NOPE

6. Adolin

Kaladin: I think horses are mean and scary. Adolin: That's just 'cause you haven't been around them enough! I swear! They're cool and friendly! Kaladin (continuing as if Adolin said nothing): But I would accept being around horses. Lots of mean horses. Kaladin: If it meant. Kaladin: Being around you. Adolin: ...? Kaladin: ... Adolin: ... Adolin: Oh! Adolin: Nice.

7. Shallan

Kaladin: [sighing dramatically] Shallan: What's wrong? Kaladin: I want to flirt with someone, but she's much wittier than I am, so I don't know how to even start. Shallan: Oooh, that's exciting! Can I give you advice? Kaladin: I would LOVE advice. Shallan: Well, it depends on whether you can match her wit, or whether you think she's entirely too witty for that. Kaladin: I think I could. Sometimes. Probably not while also flirting, though. Shallan: Sure, sure. Well, you can always just enjoy her wit and let her enjoy how smart she is. Kaladin: Yeah? You think making her feel smart is a good tactic? Shallan: Well, it certainly can't hurt! Kaladin: [significant look] Shallan: ... Shallan: Oh! Shallan: Nice.

8. Moash:

Kaladin: You know...I bet I could swallow a WAY bigger sphere than you could... Moash: MY BED IS UPSTAIRS LET'S GO RIGHT NOW

9. Szeth

Kaladin: You know...I've been thinking that maybe this trip is a chance to find what I really need. Szeth: I feel the same way. Kaladin: You...you do? Szeth: I do. Nightblood: (Me too!) Kaladin: Well, good...because I think what I really need is... Kaladin: You... Szeth (simultaneously): Vengeance. Nightblood (simultaneously): The eradication of evil! Kaladin: ... Kaladin: I don't know what I expected.

10. Jasnah

Kaladin (talking to someone else): I mean...being partnered is fine, I guess, but the sex stuff I don't really get. Jasnah: ... [...] Kaladin (to someone else): Darkeyed Radiants is good and all but, I mean, we still have slavery. Anyone who really cared about social change would do somehing about that! Jasnah: ... [...] Kaladin: (to someone else): I like Wit, but storms can he be annoying sometimes. Small doses, you know? Jasnah: ... [...] Kaladin (talking to someone else): So then I convinced the ardents that locking up the insane in dark rooms was NOT a good thing--they're gonna change the treatment! Jasnah: ... Jasnah: Has Stormblessed always been so attractive?

[rekino2114]

Anniversary date with osaragi

Pairing:osaragi x male reader

A/n:My first post back, and I thought it was only fitting for it to be my favorite girl from the new Fandom I'm writing for

Cw:there is some description of violence but nothing outside of Sakamoto days stuff

"Careful, a red light"

"Oh thanks"

Osaragi stopped the car in time and tapped her fingers on the steering wheel impatiently

"Are you alright? You seem a bit worried"

She turned to look at you, her usual beautiful emotionless face staring at you with a look you learned meant that she was surprised at your words

"Not at all, I'm just excited for today"

"I get it, it's really a huge milestone isn't it?"

"Mh"

As soon as the light turned green osaragi started driving again, going at exactly the speed limit, enough to reach your destination as soon as possible but not enough to get a speed ticket, dealing with cops and any annoyances in general was the last thing you wanted to do on this special day

"You're......the first boy I ever got to that level with"

"The same goes for me, I never had a partner before you......in both ways"

"Yeah"

"I'd say we do work together pretty well, though. Not many couples get to celebrate this, 100 is a great number"

"Shishiba told me most don't get to 30"

"It's mostly because one of the members gets too confident in their solo abilities and let the other one die.....before dying themselves"

"Ah I see"

"We're different though, I'd never let anything happen to you"

"Me too, if anyone ever hurt you......"

You saw her raise her head to the sky, almost as if to imagine the scene, before shaking her head and focusing on the road again

"I'd cut the arms of the person who hurt you and use them to strangle them, then I'll cut off the legs and use them to kick them in the stomach so that they spit out most of the blood in their body.....then I think I'll kill them"

"Awww that's so romantic, but wouldn't they die when you cut of their arms?"

"Oh........I didn't think about that"

"If someone hurt you then....ah it's no use, I can't think of something so creative on the spot but I'll make sure it's brutal, just for you"

".............so romantic"

"Right? We really understand each other"

You turned to look outside of the window when you saw that the car had arrived at the place you were supposed to be

"Oh we arrived"

Osaragi hummed in acknowledged and started looking for a parking spot nearby, finding it almost instantly

"Looks like it's our lucky day"

You got outside of the car and to osaragi's side and opened the door for her

"You're such a gentleman"

"It's nothing, anything for you~"

After locking the car you and your girlfriend started walking hand in hand on the street

"Where are we going?"

"I told you it's a surprise, and it should be riiiight here"

You pointed to a fancy looking building that had delicious cakes and every other type of pastries displayed on the shop windows

"Ah this is......."

"One of tokyo's top bakeries, they opened recently but everyone's talking about how good it is"

".....it looks super expensive, you didn't have to"

"Please, you know how good assassin pay is, plus I had to do something special for such a special day, it's not every day you get to celebrate 100 double kills with your girlfriend"

"......yeah...You're right"

You beamed brightly at osaragi who in turn faced you with the ghost of a smile on her face, which for her meant that she was over the moon

"Getting rid of the scum of the heart with the person you love most in this world is such a wonderful feeling, I had to go all out for today"

".....I couldn't have said it better myself, I love killing with you......I love you"

"I love you too, ragi"

You kissed her cheek, causing her to blush a bit, before she retaliated by leaving her black lipstick mark (that she specifically chose for this occasion) on your own cheek.

A bell above you rang as you entered the bakery, the guy behind the counter yelped when he saw your faces

"Hello, I made a reservation for here, table of two for l/n"

"A-ah of course here"

He pointed at a big table near a window

"Thanks, me and my girlfriend here are celebrating a very special day"

"O-oh that's nice, really nice yeah"

You tilted your head a bit as you saw the guy was sweating heavily and shaking

"Are you alright?"

"Y-yeah, totally alright. N-nothing's wrong"

You just shrugged and guided osaragi to your table

'T-those are two of the targets, if we can take them out I'll get so much money'

"Sorry, can we get some menus?"

"O-oh yeah"

"So what do you wanna get?"

"Hm.........I'll start with a dark chocolate mousse slice what about you?"

"Just one? You don't need to worry about the money, I'm paying"

"It's alright, I'll take one to start and then the others later.....I want to eat with you"

"That's sweet, ok I'll take the same then"

You waited for your food to arrive while talking about whatever crossed your mind. When the cakes arrived, you immediately grabbed your fork and took a bite

"Oh this is so good, the chocolate is a bit bitter though"

You turned to see that osaragi had already eaten half of her slice as she nodded to agree

"Hehe, you're so adorable when you eat"

You continued to eat your cake but at a certain point got surprised by another spoon approaching your mouth, you raised your head and saw that your girlfriend was holding out her own spoon full of a spoonful of cake

"Try this it's really good"

"......but we're eating the same flavor"

".......oh yeah"

She lowered her head dejectedly and took her spoon away but you grabbed her hand gently and stopped her while chuckling

"Just say you want to feed me"

She blushed again but proceeded to feed you with her spoon

"You're right, it does taste really good, probably because you fed it to me"

"It's nothing"

"You try it and see if I'm right"

You grabbed your own spoon and started feeding her too, she blushed but gladly accepted

"Oh......it actually does taste better"

"See? Love makes everything taste better"

You smiled at her and continued eating while the cashier guy looked at your table completely dumbfounded

'H-how? Those slices had enough poison in them to kill 5 grown men, and they're just feeding it to each other like it's nothing!?'

"Can we get seconds?"

"HUH!?"

[Timeskip]

"Ah, I'm done, I don't think I can eat any more slices"

You sighed and leaned back in your chair, then opened your eyes to see that osaragi was nodding with her mouth stuffed full of chocolate

"You don't need to finish everything just because I'm full, get more stuff if you're still hungry"

"No it's fine, I'll eat later if I need to, eating with you feels better than doing it alone"

"You're such a sweetheart, alright then, sorry can we get the bill?"

When the waiter arrived with your check he put it on the table and quickly tried to get away

"Wait something's wrong with this"

He squealed and turned back towards you, you handed him the paper as he put his hand on the table to grab it

"I don't see any- AHHHHH!"

Before he could even process it he saw that a fork pierced his hand, making a blood spread all over the table

"You don't work for JAA do you? If you did, then you would have recognized us and not tried to kill us.......or at least used a stronger poison"

In response he pulled out a gun with his other hand and aimed it at you, seeing this you just sighed

"You could have just lied and we would have turned a blind eye to it, I really don't feel like working on a day like this"

"......we have to do this already?"

"I know *sighs* and it was supposed to be our day off"

You saw osaragi lower her gaze in melancholy and made a mental note to make this more brutal than planned, you hated seeing her sad

"You know the rules, all assassins who don't work the association must be eliminated. Let's just get to this, I don't wanna waste more time on our 100 kill anniversary, it was supposed to be a special day and you just had to try and kill us"

You got up from the table as osaragi did the same, the enemy even with how scared he was still tried to shoot but you quickly kneed him in the stomach, causing him to fly away

"But I guess it's not all bad, we can aim for 200 now, do you wanna get this kill or me?"

You turned towards osaragi and saw that she still had her head down, and was visibly shaking and playing with her fingers

"What's wrong?"

".............."

"You didn't bring your buzzsaw?"

".......sorry, I really thought it was gonna be a normal date"

"It's totally fine, I didn't bring my weapon either, thankfully this idiot gave us weapons"

You grabbed a knife and fork that you were using to eat and held them up to her

"Which one do you want?"

"You paid so you get picks on the weapon, I'll also let you kill him"

"Thanks, sounds great"

You threw the fork to her and grabbed the knife, both of you approaching the guy on the ground

"You're not the smartest guy around, are you? Trying to kill two order members with such poor planning and technique"

You grabbed him by his hair and made him look at you, you smirked seeing his terrified expression

"Who do you work for? No way a rando like you would know what we look like, so who gave you the order to kill us? I would say I'll make your death painless if you tell us but that ship sailed the moment you interrupted our date and made my love sad"

While you continued your interrogation, osaragi stood nearby, gradually blushing and shaking

'........he's so attractive like this'

"So what do you have to say? If you don't like talking that's alright, I'll just cut your tongue so you can never talk again~"

"A-ah n-no alright I'll talk"

"Good choice"

"Although.......i-i don't know anything, I was given pictures of some people and was told to kill them if they walked here"

"What people?"

"Probably the other order members, they seriously expected this guy to take anyone of us down?"

"Stupid choice"

"Right"

"H-hey i-"

"Did I tell you you could talk?"

"................"

"Anyway, do you know anything about the guy who told you to kill us?"

"He's my boss, but he said someone else told him to"

"Really? So you're nothing but a grunt, makes sense"

"I-i-"

"By the way, when I came here to make a reservation i spoke to a really sweet lady behind the counter, she even said they had a discount for romantic dates for couples"

".....a-ah"

You stopped smiling as you looked him dead in the eyes

"Did you kill her just so you could take her place?"

"......i-i...ah!"

He stopped moving and talking as you cleanly slit his throat, not letting a drop of blood stain your suit

"That's good, I thought I was gonna kill a random badly paid grunt, good thing he was an asshole after all"

Osaragi nodded as you stood up from the body and adjusted your hair

"I can't stand people who pull innocent civilians in assassin business. That woman got killed for nothing, it pisses me off"

"Me too........but on the bright side"

Osaragi's lips formed into the same ghost of a smile from before

"Killing those types of people with my love is what I love most in the world"

"You put it so well. Now we should probably focus on finding that guy's boss, I doubt he'd leave that idiot alo-"

You got interrupted when you saw a fork get in front of your face, immediately later a bullet appeared in between the fork's cracks. Your eyes widened to see osaragi had protected you from another man who had tried to shot you

"Found him"

".....I owe you one"

"You already paid for the cakes, a cuddle session later will be enough"

"Sure thing, I'll let you handle him too"

"Thank you, please stand back, I don't want his blood getting on the suit I brought you"

"Of course, I made sure of that before too"

Your girlfriend turned towards the person who tried to shoot you, he tried to pull the trigger again but before he could do nothing osaragi appeared behind him at blinding speed holding the fork to his neck and almost breaking his arms

".......you tried to hurt y/n didn't you?"

"....what the fuck are you-"

"I guess you didn't actually hurt him, so I'll spare your arms and legs.......you were right y/n coming up with brutal deaths on the spot is hard"

"L-let me go!"

"I guess this will do"

She stuck the fork in one of his eyes causing him to scream before holding his mouth with her hand and kneeing him, he fell down as she put her foot above him and stabbed his heart with her high heels

"Did you like that?"

"It was fantastic~"

"Thanks"

Osaragi got off of him and dusted off her dress

"OK I think we're done now......do you think I could ask Shishiba to consider this overtime? We did work on our day off"

"........And had to interrupt our date"

You saw her look down again and held her hand

"The day's not over yet, we can still have fun, how about I make good on that cuddle session I owe you, we can have snacks and watch a movie too"

She raised her head to look at you and smiled slightly hearing your words

".....yes.....I'd like that"

"Great, it's decided then, we'll end off our 100....or I guess 102 now kills anniversary with a movie night"

You kissed osaragi's cheek and smiled brightly at her

"I love you so much ragi I'm glad I'm able to celebrate this"

"Me too.......and I'm surre it won't be the last celebration like this"

[tillyaoi]

Why I think Till is alive

complitation of stuff i noticed + stuff i saw on twitter that did make sense

#1. It just doesn't make sense. From the main four, we've seen ivan and sua and mizi's perspective on most things, mostly Ivan. but till?? NONE. the only thing we get from him is mizi flashbacks. I know mizi's the main MAIN character but till surviving until round 7 is pretty main character energy too. so it just doesn't make sense why they'd kill him off just like that. also. round 6. yeah, his best friend died for him so if he really is dead then ivan just died for nothing.

#2. In the all-in (till ver) album cover, he's the only one shown with another color in his art. and knowing vivimeng this IS a very important piece. cause all of the anniversary album covers have consistent patterns, all of them are just one color. except Till. not even HYUNA the og rebel has it. — and the 2nd color is red. which usually means or shows 'rebelling' in all of alien stage. Also. The red tape is covering where he got shot, which is also where his branding is. this could be a sign that he's getting revived or is just severely injured and is not ACTUALLY dead.

#3. In his flashback when he "died", he was with mizi. of course he would remember mizi at his final moments, she was the last person he saw and he loved her. and in that flashback, the two of them were hiding from aliens. but he had many moments with mizi as shown in the alien stage friday official arts. he could've remembered other ones but why THAT specifically? BECAUSE! it could symbolize them hiding the fact that till is alive from the aliens.

#4. AFTER that scene, it shows till dying on mizi's lap. it zooms out and we can see that till's leg is still up even if his arm already lost consious. (there was also xylophone music symbolizing till's heart beat, it stopped when his arm dropped) So if he was already dead and lost consious, his leg would also fall over cause it DOES take effort and strength to do that.so basically what im saying is he's still alive. maybe they had a plan and he faked his death.

"but their microphones can monitor their heartbeat." yeah. which leads me to no 5. #5. @pixelifiedcation's post talking about how till's microphone fell off when he was on mizi's lap, which was the end of the round so they wouldn't know if till really was alive. giving them the chance to fake his death

#6 now this the thing i noticed immediately while watching the premiere. if you rewatch all of the rounds and skip to the end, you'll see the screen where they show who the winner of the round is and who the loser is, the loser's light always fades out first before they show who the winner is fighting with next. ALL rounds except 7. they showed luka being the winner BEFORE till's light faded out. and it faded out SLOWER and even glitched, the other rounds just straight up faded out. This shows us that the aliens probably didn't know if till was alive or not since his earpiece wasn't connected.

#7 this ones just my opinion but tills death was kinda anti climatic like dont get me wrong i loved this round but its like they just brushed over his death and then showed us luka's reaction to seeing hyuna.

anyways, till is alive

[atiny-for-life]

A general rant about shipping and all that stuff...

I was asked by @thirstkanaphan for my take on this post so I've gathered my thoughts and realized I actually have a lot to say about the topic, broadly speaking and beyond the scope of what was mentioned there.

Before I begin, I'll preface this by saying I think about all of this extremely differently than what's talked about in the post. I personally also don't feel comfortable applying fictional shipping dynamics onto real people, but I also don't view it as harmful as long as it maintains restricted to fandom spaces and doesn't get pushed out to the ones it's about, so I hope we can all be cool about this!

Also, I'm 29 now and I've seen the way shipping culture has impacted real people's friendships and such, so I'll abstain from interpreting into any of their dynamics - I'll just go based on what I see and what they've said.

#1 - The Current Drama (apparently. I was previously unaware of this.)

Regarding the whole WooSanSang shipper-drama, all I can think is... this is just history repeating itself. We had the same stuff going on in the BTS fandom when certain Taekook shippers started piling onto Jimin for no reason. And what did that accomplish? Nothing. Precisely. It just made everyone, especially Tae and Jungkook, uncomfortable.

Back then, Tae even specifically called those shippers out and yet they still wouldn't stop:

So please, guys, let's not follow in those footsteps. Be better than this!

#2 - The Main Topic: Ateez vs Fanservice and Group Chemistry™

I definitely won't sit here and claim Ateez don't do fanservice - they do a lot for the fans directly (certainly more than I think they should feel obligated to) and they're obviously aware fans scream louder when any of them get close to each other, so they most likely know the most popular "ships", but I personally think comparing any of this to the Thai BL industry is taking things too far. Way too far, even.

But I'll explain myself:

I remembered them directly addressing this type of thing before so I dug around a bit and found the discussion I was thinking of in this 2020 video:

From that, we can already gather that group dynamics and chemistry have always been fluent in their heads and it's not about couples - duos, trios, the 99 line, Tropical Boys - it's all on the same level for them, all of it contributes to the Group Chemistry™.

Hongjoong here is still hilarious to me though:

On top of that, I genuinely don't think the company cares much about any of this. They just let them do whatever as long as they don't go causing controversies. That's also why they let the guys loose without media training. (The Jumping Ban™ was always a joke btw - it was never real.)

You gotta keep in mind KQ was originally a management agency - they were never following the same grain as BigHit. They also never had Ateez on a dating ban. I really don't think ships were on their mind much at all for a long time, probably right up until WooSan shippers felt the need to act up and start micro-analyzing and interpreting a million things into every small exchange which must have been impossible to ignore.

I do think that sudden shitstorm made all eight of them more aware of the many eyes that have been newly aimed at them and it's made them more careful and reserved in regards to certain things like having arguments on camera and such - they used to include moments like those in Logbooks sometimes.

But regardless, as someone who's been on top of Ateez's content since 2021, I honestly can't say I ever sensed a strain in any of their dynamics. They all very clearly adore each other a lot and, as time passed, they all collectively got closer and closer, but as they've matured, new dynamics also emerged (Topaz, for example, got really close really quickly, but also JongSang have gotten wilder, SanSang obviously got closer, and Wooyoung's lil crush on Yunho was addressed openly - and often jokingly). But that's just what happens when you're around the same 7 people day in and day out for years.

We see the same thing in groups like NCT Dream who all grew up together and have been together for ages. They constantly shift who they're obsessed with, but the overall family dynamic never wavers. I think that's just human nature - you switch up your favorite person to hang out with which keeps things interesting.

What I think is generally noteworthy though is that multiple duos can be doing the exact same thing, but only the most popular ships will be talked about and it'll be seen as A Moment™. This happens all the time.

But if you zoom out and actually keep track of all of them, it's clear to see they're all constantly all over each other - both with words and actions. I mean, all of these are from the same recent Logbook alone:

These guys just really, really love each other a lot and they're super comfortable in each other's space. They also all talk about each other all the time, whether the others are around or not. And whenever they have a solo schedule it's all "the members this", "the members that" - it's super sweet.

But more importantly, as they've gained popularity, they've also gotten more and more opportunities to build their careers, both as a group and individually. And this is exactly why I think this is no way comparable to the Thai BL industry which is wholly centred around couple-dynamics.

Ateez have been and always will be primarily about music, dancing, occasionally modelling, and whatever other passions they have. Since the beginning, they performed in zombie make-up, with masks on, etc. - they want to be known for their performances, their achievements and that's what they promote.

Whenever they do do fanservice, it's very obvious, honestly. For example, the duo fancalls recently where they were acting out what the fans wanted (the SeongJoong hug, Wooyoung sucking at Yeosang's cheek). Or when they play games where they have to get really up close and personal, they'll often exaggerate it and make teasing comments. Or when Wooyoung rubbed up against everyone while dancing to "Sexy Back" (San and Seonghwa's faces here are so friggin' funny lmao). But even when they do this type of stuff, they clearly still have fun with it themselves.

#3 - So what do I think of SanSang?

I think San just adores Yesoang a lot and he feels very protective of him. San's always been a protector even before he bulked up and, now that Wooyoung's really grown into himself and gained a lot of confidence, San may have instinctively moved to Yeosang who, honestly? Needs a protector more than anyone else in this group.

Wooyoung's already protected him for a long time and we've heard the stories of how that went - Yeosang getting fooled by a prank call, accepting strangers' invitations to pet their dogs, often needing instructions explained twice because he zones out a lot. He's not incapable - far from it (I mean, he chose to leave BigHit for his own good, thinking Wooyoung wouldn't follow, he's LOCKED IN whenever he performs, etc.) - but it is good he has people around who'll stick by him and watch over him.

#4 - San hiding his anger?

I also think San being different on- and off-camera isn't all too surprising. From the beginning, he's always acted the most while filmed (pitching up his voice, acting cutesy) because he was worried about coming across as scary or intimidating , and now he's likely concerned about being misunderstood or causing negative press if he allows himself to slip and let his anger show.

Mind you, I think his anger is likely primarily directed at saesangs, reporters, perhaps certain interview questions or other shit going on in the Kpop industry or just the world at large (politics, social injustices, etc.). We know he has a huge heart and he cares deeply and feels very protective, so seeing the state of the world right now will likely make him no less angry than it does the rest of us. But since he's a public figure, he has to sit on it a lot more.

#5 - 8 Makes 1 Team!

Now regarding what I think whenever the members flirt with each other, bicker, hug, kiss, etc. - I think they just do it because it's fun! They enjoy the fans getting so loud and hyped up while they're on stage, but they clearly also love seeing each other's reactions, pushing each other's boundaries, exploring how far they can go before the other one puts a stop to it. I mean, they've always been equally affectionate off camera too.

For example, Wooyoung biting Yeosang shortly after meeting him, WooSan being seen with their arms around each other while walking down the street years ago, all the 99 liners going to Seonghwa's bed for cuddles when they were still all sharing a dorm as eight (Seonghwa mentioned it in a live once when Yunho came to lay down with him).

They always pile onto each other, whether they know they're being filmed or not. It's likely what happens when you've been through hell together and we know their path to success was tough and included lots of abuse at the hands of Mnet, people who called themselves fans but aren't, award shows, and more. Not to mention the shit Jongho's been through with his former label and Mingi needing a mental health break and time to reconsider whether he even wanted to continue on this path or not.

Them having been this open with their words and physical affection from early on (thanks, Wooyoung <3) is clearly also what has gotten Jongho to be so much bolder now compared to when they first debuted. He even thanked them for it in 2019:

Ultimately, I don't know if any of them are truly dating or have ever dated. Just as I don't know if any of them have had or currently have romantic crushes on each other. All I know is what they show us and what they say and anything beyond that is for them to know and them to know only. I'm just happy to see them happy and thriving.

In conclusion:

I don't want to shame anyone for how they interpret and interact with the content Ateez puts out. If you like to ship, ship away within fandom spaces. All is good as long as personal boundaries are respected and everyone remains conscious of where they post and who might see it.

Please also keep in mind that everything I said here is simply how I see it, but if you'd like to chat about differences in opinion and such, please do feel free reach out - my ask box and messages are always open! <3

[genderqueerdykes]

just saw that "you are loved" cuttlefish post on my dash again (idk if you know the one) but it goes through so many identities and just. does not include trans men. pan people, bi people, lesbians, trans women, intersex people, nonbinary people too i think, but not trans men. like maybe I'm taking it the wrong way, maybe I should celebrate that all of these types of people are being celebrated, i especially loved seeing intersex people included, but? the deliberate exclusion just hurts I guess. it would've been so easy to say trans people or just include trans men too.

another thing that makes me feel like I'm just being overly sensitive about it is that I do tend to lean into the nonbinary label sometimes, but it feels very "the only good enby is a femme-lite enby" and I'm. audibly sighing I used to like seeing that post on my dash

i haven't seen the post you're referring to, but i have definitely noticed this with queer positivity posts in general

like people think it's somehow progressive to aggressively leave trans men out of every conversation, ever. like, people have gone too far with profiling people based off their genders to the point where they trick themselves into thinking that trans men are now Cishet Male Oppressors and find excuses and reasons to target, bully, and emotionally abuse us. people literally just think we are undeserving of love and kindness because us disclosing that we're a man suddenly somehow is hurting that person

people are NOWHERE near as aggressive about this with cis gay men. people are not sitting here trying to weed cis gay men out of every space and post as possible. it sends me reeling to realize that people accept cis men more than trans men, even though they love to say how much they hate "all" men. is it really "all" men, or is it just trans men? because it feels very pointed toward a specific group of men that nobody loves to name, but everyone loves to hate.

i know that people who aren't trans men usually can't see the pain this causes us. but so many people just don't care. they assume that we have no feelings because they stereotype men to be emotional brick walls. they think it's okay to leave us out and abuse us because somehow, trans manhood has hurt them. like these people behave like a bus full of trans men showed up at their front door and kicked them to death.

like people really are so threatened by the idea that a "woman" can become a man. why is this an issue?

and good lord that is the ugliest take on nonbinaryhood i've ever seen. "femme-lite". wow. people really just do see nonbinary people as women, huh? nonbinary people aren't cis women jesus fucking christ. masc and butch nonbinary people are still nonbinary and there's nothing wrong with that. jesus christ people are SO scared of diversity. people are SO scared of something they can't relate to.

feminine people and women are not inherently safe to be around. i have been sexually and physically assaulted by multiple women. i have been groped by women. i have had cis women tell me that i'm "basically a woman" because i have a vagina and i'm a trans man. i've had women emotionally and mentally abuse me. women and femmes have stolen things from me. women and femmes are not inherently safe to be around. women and femmes can hurt you.

i'm sorry you're encountering this kind of stuff. people are more proud to talk about who they hate than who they love/like and it's just ugly. they don't care that it's affecting people. but if someone does something to even slightly inconvenience them, like, idk, being a trans man, then suddenly the world grinds to a halt. it's entitled behavior. it's people who want to be in control of the queer community and try to control our narratives.

there are some people who are legitimately a part of the queer community for the wrong reasons. the amount of people who are converting to rad feminism and thinking that the queer community needs to be a Cis Girls Only Club is staggering. people are trying to remove everyone but cis women who are pathologically afraid of an entire gender that hasn't hurt them. this isn't the terf club. stop trying to make this into the terf club.

i hope you're able to feel a bit better soon. people are so fucking shitty and it's time it stops. there's no reason to profile people. that's not what we do here. it's not right to leave people out of our spaces who rightfully belong. ignoring the existence of trans men won't make us go away. we're here and you need to listen to us and care about us because we are your siblings and we have not inherently wronged you by virtue of existing.

[formulakracing]

✧˖° a day in the life ✧˖°

pairing: female!driver x toto wolff

summary: as the season progresses, you decide to share some of your favorite snapshots to your instagram. however, as you post more and more photos, the fans are beginning to really starting to wonder who that mystery man may be.

a/n: these posts are set between chapters vii, viii, and ix of alkaline! they aren’t really super time specific. they’re just around the time golden girl was in brackley, her travels through england, and of course, the races!

liked by williamsracing, alex_albon, lilymhe, and 800,004 others!

goldengirl: a day in the life :p

view 2,082 comments

lilymhe: oh my gosh!!! it’s me!!! ilysm!! 🥹

goldengirl: ofc!!! my bestie <3 ily more!!

goldengirlforever: these are so cute! 🤍

kikiayy: mother is mothering with the photo dumps lately

f1fanboy: i can feel her aura through the screen

alex_albon: who’s that cutie in the second photo? i need her number ASAP‼️

goldengirl: sorry but she doesn’t date nerds 🤓

alex_albon: if you keep bullying me, i’m going to go straight to james! i am not NOT messing around‼️👹😤

williamsracing: what’s 4 + 4? cause you ATE that! 💅🏻

f1fangirly: PLS WILLIAMS WHAT IS THIS!!?

goldengirlforever: i’m literally crying rn 😭 wtf

goldengirlstan: they really slayed with that comment though

view more replies

lewishamilton: why does it look like you’re in twilight in the first pic lol

mercedesgirly0420: ARIANA WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?

hastalavistababy: WHAT ON—

justaninchident: this is the weirdest crossover episode ever

view more replies

landonorris: can u send me the editing app u use you ur pics

goldengirl: idk can you use proper grammar first?

landonorris: can YOU send me the editing app that YOU use for YOUR photos? please and thank you mommy 🥺

landonorrisfan8383: MOMMY⁉️ 😳 HELLO⁉️

f1ismylife: WAIT WHAT IF LANDO IS THE MYSTERY MAN SHE HAS BEEN POSTING—

mclarengirly: OH MY GOD YOU COULD BE RIGHT!

goldengirl: ahahaha no. that’s not my man. it’s just an inside joke. nothing more, i promise :p

view more replies

liked by lilymhe, mercedesamgf1, lewishamilton, and 736,283 others

goldengirl: recent travels ˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚

view 4,763 comments

lilymhe: you’re so cute i’m gonna throw up

goldengirl: i WISH a certain someone would flirt with me the way you do 😫

alex_albon: i’m still waiting on meeting the day you bring this mystery man to the paddock. 🤨

goldengirl: i will one day!

mercedesamgf1: hey! that looks familiar! 😎

goldengirl: thank you for showing me around! i had a great time! :)

hastalavistababy: THIS IS GETTING WEIRD.

goldengirlforever: PLEASE DON’T TELL US YOU’RE SIGNING WITH MERCEDES NEXT SEASON.

view more replies

lewishamilton: why didn’t you tell me you were in brackley? 🧐

goldengirl: because it was for business and not hanging out 🙄🤚🏻

mercedesfan737: BUSINESS?

ilovef1: this is getting insane. where is drive to survive when you need them? 😩 i hope they’re covering this for the upcoming season

formulaonefan4life: wdym business? this is fishy af.

view more replies

goldengirl: guys…. i literally had a meeting with some sponsors in london & then i decided to take a trip to brackley to see the mercedes hq & campus. just because i drive for williams doesn’t mean that i can’t just go look at the place 😭

totosgirl73738: it’s just a bit sketch because toto was in brackley the same time you were.

justaninchident: @totosgirl73728 girl… that man owns 33% of the company.. i think he works there.

totoswife1988: she’s just not making herself look good rn with all the affair rumors going around. that’s all. going out of her way to brackley to just “see” the mercedes is weird.

justaninchident: speculating about someone’s personal life is weird. 🥱

view more replies

landonorris: was the mercedes campus cool at least? sorry ppl are being nosy af

goldengirl: yeah! i got to meet a ton of their staff & saw a lot of behind the scenes stuff! come with me next time. we can try fish and chips!

landonorris: omg!! the boys and golden girl take a field trip!! we can visit george and eat beans on toast!

view more replies

alexandrasaintmleux: where can i fill out the application to be you? is there like a tutorial or something i can follow?

goldengirl: brb i’ll post one to tik tok right now! 🤭

[pippin-katz]

Alright, I have mostly restrained myself, but I cannot stay quiet any longer. There is a question that has been eating at me...

Whose fucking idea was it to have Henry (Nicholas) constantly grabbing Alex's (Taylor's) hair?!

Note: I'm adding this in after finishing writing this because this was supposed to be a relatively short post, and then it spiraled out of control, so if you want to listen to me gradually lose my sanity over this question, feel free to keep reading, cause it is admittedly funny lmfao

Another Note: This is me being overly sarcastic and hyper cause it’s funny for me to think about that situation. This is supposed to be a funny post. I said that at the end, but I’m adding it here too.

Listen, remember what they said about the intimate scenes: they were planned down to every detail. Remember what Nicholas said about having conversations with Taylor, Matthew, and Robbie about boundaries, what was okay, and not okay. Remember that they have A LINE IN THE FILM ABOUT HENRY GRABBING HIS HAIR (iconic).

Do you see it? Do you see where this is going?

The hair pulling/grabbing is not random. It doesn't happen in just the New Year's kiss to set up a funny line later.

It happens all the time.

Even in soft moments, Henry has a hand in his hair.

The hair grabbing gets its own shot in their love-making scene.

Consistent small actions (twisting a ring, biting nails, drumming with fingers, etc.) are character habits. They're things that they do all the time, subconsciously or for a decisive reason, usually if you know that action causes a specific response that you want for any reason.

There's a coworker that drives you crazy, so you purposefully hum really loudly whenever they're in the room to piss them off. Your friend has a sensitivity to the color red, so on days you know you're going to see them, you avoid wearing it. Your partner has muscle cramps, so you massage their shoulders whenever you're standing behind them.

These habits usually start as conscious decisions, then gradually become subconscious, hence the term "habit". You've been doing something for so long or for frequently enough that you do it while on "autopilot".

I think it's pretty obvious why this action happens. It's because A: Henry likes feeling of his hair, and/or B: Alex likes when someone touches his hair. Note: This could be in any context, not just sexual; running fingers through it, washing it, styling it, etc.

Either you figured out what I am going to say, and you're wondering why I'm blabbering on so much, or you're just confused about where I'm going with this at all, so here's where it all clicks together.

When you have a character, habits are something you give them to give them more personality, more insight into their mentality through subtle things they do. It's something the director/writer/actor chooses to give to the character.

BUT - nothing in the intimacy scenes happen without being discussed and agreed upon.

This isn't like Nicholas fidgeting with the signet ring to show Henry's nerves. This isn't like Taylor frequently making little hand gestures (peace signs, finger guns, tapping the side of his glass, etc.) because Alex has undiagnosed ADHD and that's one way to physically imply it.

They can do those things without being told or given "permission" because it's their portrayal of the character, it doesn't effect anyone else, and small details like that are typically up to the actors, unless the director is incredibly strict.

BUT - AGAIN WITH FEELING - NOTHING IN THE INTIMACY SCENES HAPPEN WITHOUT BEING DISCUSSED AND AGREED UPON.

That means that someone, one of the four of them, brought up grabbing his hair as a suggestion, and further more, Taylor (and Nick, but obviously Taylor's consent is more important in this specific case) was fine with it.

Think about it. Think about them sitting around a table discussing the kinds of stuff that Matthew and Robbie would want to see, and what Nick and Taylor would be okay with. Think about the fact that one of them was sitting there, and looked at the other three, and said: "What if Henry grabs Alex's hair a lot?"

And then the four of them had to sit there, and talk, in depth, about what that would mean.

*inhale*

Who... the fuck... said it?

WHO SAID IT?!

Did Matthew and Robbie present it as part of the initial planning?? Or did one of them look Taylor and Nick in the eye and say it?? Did Nick throw it out there as something he thought Henry would do?? Was it Taylor??? Since it's his hair???

Cause it's not just like, running Nick running his fingers through it, combing it during some tender moment, like when Alex talks about his father being an immigrant.

HE FUCKING GRABS IT.

What the fuck were these conversations like?! I cannot think of a single way to have that conversation where someone wouldn't have to say something that would make me make me go UHHH-

What? So - Matthew's like "how do you guys feel about touching each other's hair?" -and they're like "what, you mean like running our fingers through it?" -and he's like "nah yanking it while you're making out"

Like... what do you say to that?! - "oh which one of us would do it to the other?" -and what, did Taylor fucking volunteer?? Just like - "he can pull my hair, it's chill" - WTF?!

Or did he suggest it in the first place, like they were discussing things that would that could be part of Alex and Henry's dynamic and he's just like - "he could pull my hair?" -and the other three just stared at him for a second, because wtf that's a intensely intimate action to suggest?!

Hair touching in general is really intimate, in like, every context, at least I think to most people, and definitely to me. Most people wouldn't just let someone, even someone they were friends with, start playing with their hair or touching their head. I wouldn't even let my best friend randomly touch my head; I would instinctually try to bite their hand off (not a joke). Maybe I'm a slight bit more touch-repulsed than most, but I feel like it's safe to say that the majority of people don't want their hair and head being touched, grabbed, or played with unless they say so.

And again, they do it CONSISTENTLY. It's not a one and done scene. It is an actual dynamic between Alex and Henry they chose to establish.

SO I ASK AGAIN: WHOSE IDEA WAS IT?!

I'm looking at you four, Matthew, Robbie, Taylor, and Nicholas. I know it was one of you cheeky bastards that suggested it. One of you brought it up, and the rest of you were like "sure".

I will be forever haunted by this mystery, as I doubt I will ever get an answer.

Note: Please don't take this super seriously. I'm not trying to imply anything; I'm literally just joking around cause the concept of having that conversation boggles my mind lol

Thanks for reading!! If you enjoyed this essay & would like to support me, you can give me a tip on my Ko-Fi! ☺️

[olderthannetfic]

So, you mentioned low standards of research in podcasts. I don't listen to podcasts or watch a lot of videos about fandom analysis, but I have seen error corrections happening in the wild for what I have listened to, so I can only imagine how annoying it is when you know your shit.

Do you have any resources that come to mind as things everyone who likes fandom should be comfortable with, or specific essays on uniquely important fandoms (such as Sherlock Holmes or Star Trek) that everyone should read? Obviously the OTW resources are up there; what else?

Aside from resources, do you think there are any skills that are especially vital for getting to the bottom of fandom trends? Interview skills are probably pretty high up there.

Any pitfalls you see a lot of young fans falling into?

(I do a lot of fandom history research. It is the thing that gives me joy in fandom; other people like shipping or AUs, I like my little mini-anthropology sandbox and watching how ideas spread. I'm not necessarily good at it, but it's fun!)

--

Well... it's the usual things.

For example, a lot of fans claim to love fandom stats, but the ones that get passed around come from like three people. The people doing those stats, including me, don't usually have a statistics background, which doesn't automatically make them bad, but it really seems like people are just trusting anything with a pie chart.

We've recently seen people discover that those year-end AO3 ship stats have a seriously weird methodology. They don't show the thing their fans are actually trying to find out. People were pissed. But most of the time, they don't even bother asking what the methodology is or trying to do anything themselves.

There's far too much sitting back and waiting for some BNF to spoon feed one publicly-available information.

--

The big failings aren't usually the math itself but, of course, not knowing what question to ask, so it pertains to history research, not just stats.

You'll see a lot of stuff on shipping that looks at AO3 because AO3 shipping numbers are easy to pull... But AO3 shipping numbers don't just happen to be easy to pull: that is both an effect and a cause that is directly related to AO3's content. Someone interested in meta shouldn't be asking "What do AO3's numbers show?" as their first question. They should be asking "Why is this metadata available or not available and what does that mean on a sociological level?"

--

Thing two is the eternal I Have Apparently Never Heard of Anime problem. A fuckton of people theorizing about fandom trends seem to know fucking nothing about whole massive sectors of fandom or treat them as afterthoughts. This is okay if you're writing a history of Media Fandom. It is criminally stupid if you're trying to talk about what makes a piece of media have fic when another doesn't, what kinds of websites make fandoms take off, etc. Those kinds of broad questions need a broad understanding of what's out there.

It's not anime-specific, and I'm not asking for a high degree of knowledge.

I have routinely had people tell me that best friend ships and mystery/crime as a genre aren't popular, and that's why AO3 has this or that pattern... Meanwhile, buddy cops are the bedrock of oldschool slash fandom and make up basically all of the longest-running Western m/m fandoms that aren't Star Trek. CSI slop tends to have legions of future canon het shippers, and they make plenty of fanworks. It's just that some of this is more visible on FFN or older places, not AO3.

I'm always seeing things like someone speculating about how this and that anime fandom thing or bit of mid-00s FFN community drama led to this other thing on AO3, not realizing that AO3 came out of LJ Western fandom slash culture. To them, FFN is so central that it must be the main reference point, not the bajillion and one archives AO3 founders ran or Usenet or mailing lists or LJ.

I once saw someone asking on twitter about where a prominent Ranma fic might have been posted in the mid-90s. People claiming "My professor is an authority!" came out of the woodwork in droves to blither about K/S zines and then LJ. Not only was this entirely wrong, but the right answer was blindingly obvious if you knew enough to interpret the google results. I can only assume that the person tweeting had never heard of Usenet and didn't recognize the acronym for the big anime fanfic group that literally everything like this was first posted to.

I'm talking people insisting that fandom only goes for white characters when it's very obvious that fandom goes for majority leads who are not othered. All the bawwing in the world about "People assume anime characters are white" won't get rid of The Untamed or Kpop thirsters or whatever.

I'm talking sweeping pronouncements about gender and fanfic writers where the person hasn't even heard of FIMFiction or SpaceBattles or Dark Lord Potter cheesefests.

I've been in fandom for a long time, but I wasn't in all these parts, and I wasn't around for 80s zines. You don't need deep knowledge until you pick a research topic. But it's shocking how little shallow, broad knowledge a lot of people have when they're writing their Theory Of All Of Fandom History.

--

People are stupid as shit about survivorship bias, and fandom history is no exception. They're also dumb in the opposite direction, assuming that the thing they like now has always existed in this exact form.

For example, someone got mad at Fanlore for supposedly not documenting the history of f/f zines. Others have searched and searched for the zines of their old show they got into last year and are bewildered to not find any. The reality is that Fanlore editors are attempting to document every Media Fandom zine and have combed through old adzines looking for any mention of anything. Because of the methods of distribution—because it was expensive—small fandoms often had no zines at all.

Femslash fandom doesn't seem to have gotten enough critical mass to do much until Xena. The internet has really democratized things, but even the early internet was still somewhat in that old mindset where only certain popular things have a fandom. I think Yuletide itself, which started in 2003, really helped spread the idea of rare-but-existing fandoms being a thing. FFN and perhaps some other multifandom archives like Media Miner played a huge role.

Nowadays, we think of fic as just how you respond to media, any media, even if there are only two fics for that one car commercial, but that isn't how people saw things in every era—or at least it's not how fandom infrastructure worked. A lot of the time, the big hosting spots were single-fandom archives, often with restrictive content rules. Finding somewhere to post a m/m/f OT3 fic used to be hard. Never mind early zines when photocopiers didn't even exist yet and you had to sell out your print run of 500 to make a go of it.

All good research starts with a lot of preliminary investigation to figure out what you're even trying to look for.

Actually bothering to look for fans talking about their own history or casually chatting with your interview subjects before the formal interview will put a person miles ahead of many of the cringeworthy fandom ~papers~ I've seen.

The biggest mistake people make is going "Okay, these numbers aren't perfect, but some numbers are better than no numbers".

Bullshit.

As soon as there's a pie chart of the false numbers, everyone's brain turns off and they never look at the chart subtitle, never mind the research notes.

Bad numbers are often worse than no numbers.

Look at the logic behind the methodology first. Look at the social context. Basic understanding of human nature and familiarizing oneself with the shape and hangout locations of a community will get you most of the way there before you sit down for a specific interview or try to collect any specific numbers.

--

None of this is a fandom thing. Research is research. It's just that most people think "research" means watching a tiktok that the algorithm likes and were never taught how to evaluate a source for reliability.

Evaluating sources is a skill. I had explicit lessons on it in school. Lots of people don't, and that sucks.

Honestly, watching the more thoughtful debunking content on non-fandom topics, like Miniminuteman's stuff on pseudo-archaeology or Dan Olson's... everything, is a good window into critical thinking, and that's most of what's missing from bad fandom history.

--

But more than any of that, more is more. Not the crap stats, but the narrower, more personal accounts, the interviews. The more fans who investigate their little corner that isn't the same old AO3 site-wide "Why is there so much m/m?" ship stats or the same canned "Everything comes from K/S" history, the better.

What I object to is not amateur efforts but efforts that pull from the same small pool of data or that just reblog a tiny handful of supposed authorities.

--

If people are going to read just one thing... hmm... go try to look up a history of rec.arts.anime.creative, not because I think it's the most important fandom history out there but because it's at the nexus of things a lot of current fandom history work miss.

[reflections-in-a-critical-eye]

This will be more of a personal post sprinkled with some thoughts on AYS?!, so for those interested strictly in shipping content, you can skip this.

I couldn't help myself yesterday to wait until my work schedule was done. So I watched the first two episodes during lunch break and work, while using the keyboard from time to time to not appear offline.

And then a second time in the evening, without as many interruptions. I even texted my sister to remind her that the episodes have been released (she has JK's songs on her playlists and that's where it stops). My tone was very casual, as if I just remembered it was already up. As if I haven't actually been thinking and obsessing about that show for a year now. But that's because I can't let this online, fandom "life" seep through my other, "real" one. I've always struggled with my feelings of shame over being part of such spaces. Which is why I avoided them completely. Up until four years ago. I'm still dealing with it. I don't want to tell people that I have an interest in a kpop ship and that it's been ongoing for a few years now. It feels to foreign to the image I allow others to have of me and this kpop stuff is childish to say the least. I've fallen victim to the talking points I've argued against intellectually. But life doesn't work that way. My rational brain doesn't get along with my feelings.

So I keep my thoughts about shipping, fandoms, jikook here. And I share them with friends and people that have a connection to it. It's why I have a blog. So I can post a photo of jikook holding hands at the beginning of their journey and at least 10 people will understand it cause they like the same thing. I'm not a loser on my own here so the thought feels comforting.

I didn't have specific expectations about AYS?!, but I felt happy watching it. It was different, but a good different. Having the opporrtunity to witness them from morning till evening without any interruptions painted an interesting picture and it's the first time to see some parts of their dynamic.

They bicker, they flirt, they get lovingly annoyed, they get bored, they get silent, they get touchy. It feels more real than any 2-min clip from a Memories DVD could possibly show us. I don't want picture perfect jikook because it doesn't exist. Being in stan spaces, all I see everyday is worship, a mentality that is then transfered to the people surrounding the idol. But I don't want JK to worship Jimin 24/7 or vice versa. That's not a real relationship of any kind. I want to see them treat each other like they're just people. Which is what they did. Too bad that some have interpreted that as negative when in fact all we got were clear signs of actual closeness. And nothing beats it like Jungkook's attitude towards Jimin being sick. Shippers/supporters have clips and endless arguments on hand to explain the closeness between jikook, but honestly? That first evening in the cabin when JM was in the bathroom and subsequently the next morning should be the sole argument from now on. It can't be more obvious if it hit us in the head.

It's not about needing confirmation at every step of them being a couple. At least I don't need that. In the long run, it wouldn't even matter if they're not. What's noticeable is that they appear to be one and that doesn't come out of thin air.

Is my mood volatile these days? Yes. Actually these past few months. Do I need this show as one of those feel good series? Definitely, because there's nothing else out there to catch my attention in terms of tv content. I don't want to pick apart and poke holes and question every single line to make myself feel miserable. Everything else is too bad and I am too lame so I rely on this show for a short, temporary thing that improves my mood. I don't care about other things, doubts or worries. I really really just want to enjoy jikook doing whatever they want. I don't have high standards.