#not-so-late night ramblings with Kristen

[kittykatinabag]

After much thought that I'm too lazy to write out here, I've come to the conclusion that the crux of my problems stem from the observation that even when I ask for specific help with something that's bothering me, no one who has the power to help actually listens to my words and instead proceeds to voice their own theory/opinion on what I asked them (or sometimes a completely different topic).

It's just disappointing. I don't treat myself like that anymore, I don't think I treat others like that, why does it seem like everyone else is treating me like this?

[michygranger23]

Hello!! I bring to you the second part of the Spider-people to get to know them better!! Hopefully I'll continue the discduo one later today or until tomorrow. ALSO!! If you have any ideas for any of the outfits for the Spider-people I'm up to hear them!! I already have some ideas but I'm up to hear other's opinions. Anyways ONTO THE RAMBLE!!

(Part 2/2)

Spider-Nihachu "Spider-Aqua" (Earth 0311001)

Nihachu is a 21 year old woman who recently moved to New York (she used to live in Brooklyn) who shares an apartment with Minx (they're best friends from a long time and get along really well). She works at a bakery alongside Ranboo (who is a student). Tommy and Tubbo are regulars at the place to come eat some sweets and talk with the both of them (Ranboo and them are classmates)

Niki was bitten by a radioactive spider while swimming in a pool near an Alchemax building when she went to practice there. Minx never knew about the secret since Niki never wanted to put her in danger.

Her special power is that she's able to breathe underwater (the spider that bit her was a diving bell spider, the only spider that can live underwater), and she's also able to create bubbles of water that get to help her to capture villains (imagine them like if they were like bubbles, the exterior of the bubble would be water, and the interior is oxygen, so the people trapped don't drown-unless she makes the interior made of water as well-).

She lost Minx when she was fighting Mysterio (in her universe, Sam is Mysterio). He created an illusion where Minx and some rumble was falling down a building, she went straight to Minx, only to find out that Mysterio tricked her to pick the rumble, and Minx fell down the building.

Other villains she has: Tommy as Green Goblin, HBomb as Sandman, Punz as Electro, Jschlatt as Kingpin, Puffy as Black Cat, etc.

Spider-Technoblade "Blood-Arachne" (Earth 010699)

Technoblade is a 24 year old man that lives in New York with his family. Philza is his dad, Kristin is his mother, Tommy and Wilbur are his brothers. He works as a history teacher in a high-school (the same one Tommy goes to) and is also a fencing teacher in the weekends.

Techno was bitten by a radioactive spider when he went to an abandoned subway to supervise Tommy and Wilbur that wanted to explore the place, the subway was near an Alchemax building.

His special power is to detect his enemies by hearing the palpitations of their blood and their scent. He's able to smell the blood type of his enemies to recognize them, hear the beating of their heart to locate where they are, and determine how big or small their enemy is. In consequence of this power, he hears voices in his head that sometimes demand a bloodbath, he usually satisfies this by eating raw meat that still contains blood -or even some small animals- (his body needs to consume blood to survive and satisfy the voices, as if he was a vampire. The voices usually are pretty chill and annoying most of the time, but when it comes to blood, they become bloodthirsty voices). He also makes webs made by his own blood, it doesn't hurt him (that's why the name blood). He told his brothers about his secret when they caught him sneaking back to his room after a night of patrol while he was still in costume with his mask off.

He lost Kristin while fighting The Lizard (in his universe, Sapnap is the Lizard). Sapnap tried to infect the city with the lizard-gas, Kristen was in the mall the fighting was taking place on, and when Techno almost beated The Lizard, he made the mall explode, Techno was able to get Sapnap and him out of the explosion, and when he tried to caught his mom, it was too late.

Other villains he has: Quackity as Green Goblin, Tubbo as Doc Oc, Eret as Vulture, Fundy as Scorpion, etc.

AND THAT'S ALL THE SPIDER-PEOPLE!! Let me know your thoughts and opinions about this!! I'll work on the discduo one later today or tomorrow, so look out for that!! Let me know as well your ideas for the design of the Spider-people and discduo if you have any!!

[baddygab-bi]

I know that a lot of people headcanon Eddie as gay. Like 100% he only loves men gay. And like… I don’t know if it’s just cause I’m demi and bi, but I kinda don’t know how I feel about this headcanon. The show has shown Eddie being interested in physical relationships with women, both with Shannon when they started sleeping together again and later with Ana. With Ana it was clear they’d hooked up before because of what she said at the department store with getting his clothes off him and Eddie’s reaction that wasn’t a “no, stop, shut up!” it was a “not here!” At the date, yeah it was really weird that he brought homework, but at the end he did seem interested in making out or doing more. I actually think it’s pretty implied that he was late getting home “construction on sunset” because he was busy doing some adult things with Ana.

All that to say! Eddie can still be into guys, he can still be into Buck, without removing the fact that at some points in his life he was into women. Was he always getting into relationships for the best reasons? No, he definitely wasn’t, but I don’t think it would be sticking as close to canon and Eddie’s character to say that he was never into women at all. People can definitely change and sexualities are so fluid and constantly fluctuating… but based on what we’ve seen and what the writers intended, when Eddie was with his previous girlfriends/wife, he did enjoy being with them, maybe not nearly as much as he could someone else (yes, I mean a guy; yes, I mean potentially Buck), but it wasn’t zero. I think that if they wanted to have Eddie reveal his sexuality and it be that he’s gay, they could, but they’d have to talk about the idea of forced masculinity and internalised homophobia or family pressure, and then have him examine his relationships in retrospect. I think the show could do this, I think it could be amazing.

But as of right now with everything that they’ve done, I just don’t see Eddie being 100% gay, women repulsed, was only using Shannon and Ana as a plot to make Buck jealous- like a lot of fics have him do. What’s so bad about Eddie being bi? Like why couldn’t he have enjoyed being with women, but still not have been okay with the instant family and still feeling the pressures of being a man and having a wife?

Eddie has thought about Chris and what he wanted in every past relationship. If Kristen doesn’t get her way (she hates the idea that Buck or Eddie are queer) and Eddie was forcing himself to be with a woman to give Chris a mom, and that’s why he was with women… that’s great, there’s so much there to unpack and it would be incredible. But! He was still into them, even if it was only for a short while and realized it wasn’t what he wanted. Saying Eddie never liked girls at all ever when it was clear that he at least liked both Shannon and Ana for a little bit… feels a little off to me.

The writers have the power to make Eddie queer and honestly it would add so much to his story and be so fucking incredible. I’m fully on board with Buddie until the writers or showrunner *cough* Kristen *cough* somehow wreck that beyond belief, so I’m here for non-straight Eddie all the way. But changing canon things to fit the headcanon that he’s gay, versus using the way he forced himself into relationships that didn’t fit and never felt right even while enjoying his time (sexually and conversationally) with his past relationships and then realizing why it never felt right and then realize he’s also into guys and he’s more into guys instead, is still so valid.

Anyway I know I’m gonna get so much hate for this, but it’s just my rambling thoughts for this Sunday night.

[noxspost]

a violin dreams and nightmares

A Violin the color of black night with golden roses painted on. Oh, a violin how can such a simple tool make so many tears and days of melancholy. But Philza was back in the room where his brother would play for him and Lily the room was big since his mother loved to flaunt her wealth but the room was a ghost of what it once was, but the siren song continued to call so he ran after the sound and finally pushing back a curtain to reveal a young ghost maybe in his 20s and was holding a violin black a night with the pegs being skulls.

              The clothing was trousers, white formal with a black-grey vest with rose details. His hair was a milky brown hair with curls that bounce as he played the violin, he wore glasses the frames being thin, eyes now open staring blankly at the room, then at Philza. Tears pricked his eyes he had the strong urge to run to the man and hugged him for all of time, but his feet were frozen in place and the melody change to a powerful sad and tears flowed down the man face.

With that illusions of creatures from piglings to endermen and this cause so much pain as Philza remembers the stories that his brother would talk about women with pig or boar features in the nether that could tear through the strongest of man and men with wings that would hunt with hunters in the new world when it wasn’t turned into a country or own by the brits. He heard the music pick up in pace and emotions and then he stops the music echoing in the empty room and he turned to where Philza walked to sit to watched and listen better “what do you want?” he spoke in a soft firm tone “hello I Philza.” Phil shot back kindly as he got up to shake hand with the man

“I am William Riceshrie.” Both starred at each other, and William put down his violin and picks up Philza and spinning and crying with tears of joy. Phil’s wings puff out as he is also crying tears of relief “you have your wing little brother.” Was all he said with Philza not speaking but weeping in his late brother arms which were tinted black like frost bite had touch him.

The violin safe on the table as both brothers embrace each other once again “William I did I got my wings and kept your stories alive.” Philza said with tears rounding down his face like rivers and his wings were wrapped around the older brother “I can see you have so many feathers.”

 He just cried more as they felt the room break around them leaving a old burn down house ruins of what once stood the snow falling on the ground didn’t feel cold but was here “how did you get the wings?” William asked voice sounded like a worried father “I got them by messing with fate tapestries and wax and feathers.” William just held his brother’s face as he just looked at Philza’s wings and nodded not speaking “hey you got them I hope learn not mess with fate.” He nodded and both went back to just holding on to each other out of fear of losing one another “now what happened with you because I haven’t since you since you recover from the plague you had?” Philza began to ramble off about his life after he almost died to tuberculosis. He had 3 sons, married to lady death or Kristen, he named his first-born Wilbur soot after his late brother and how he had the curse of empathy and immortally. William looked so proud and happy “my little brother has a family.”

Philza smiled holding the earing of a crow skull “yeah I am the right-hand man of lady death the sister to black feather and Soleks.”  As he notices the signs that it was almost time to wake up “see you later brother….”

He woke up jolting up with a cold sweat as he lay in bed, he looked at his windows and sighed “why must memories haunt me so much?” he got up and went to the box holding the violin and grab a letter and removing the wax seal and putting into a jar that hold wax seal for reuse. Finally reading what was in the letter after so many years of fear and grief  

                                         Dear brother,

If you are reading this letter, I am surely dead. I have written some things down for you and lily. One I love you dearly and thanks for listening to our history. Philip, I wish you the best of luck and if you read this go to the cave with red vines and lava if you want to know where my stuff is that I want to save from mother’s hands.

                        I will miss you two greatly but with a heavy heart I will be in limbo and maybe more when suntail cut the silk for me. But Phillip you will get some of my things like my papers, earrings and rings and hat but also my violin since I trust you with it and my favorite pocket watch.

I am deep sorry I couldn’t see you take your first steps to the door after you got better if you got better and if you are dead Phil, I will wait at the gates till I can see you.

                                                  Sincerely, William  

The cold wet tears come back his skin around his eyes becoming wet and tight from the tears that fall on the paper knowing his brother is forever waiting for him maybe even with Lilly. He couldn’t let out all the screams of pain and sorrow out of fear of technoblade knowing.    

[childishfluff]

The Feeling Of Family- A MCYT Agere/CGLRE fic (Regressors!SBI+Tubbo and Ranboo, Carer!Philza)

There was a very specific feeling that came to Ranboo when he met up with his internet friends. A weirdly comforting feeling, a reassurance that he had finally found his people.

It came to him with every hug from Tubbo, every teasing ruffle of his hair from Techno, every inappropriate joke he shared with Tommy. It clouded his mind every time he regressed with them, too, he didn't quite know how to describe it. But if he had to put a name to this odd emotion, he'd call it 'the feeling of family'.

A/N: get ready for a looooong ride. This was written over the course of two days, I really hope you guys like it! I haven't dropped a fic thats over 4000 words in a bit, I think. This is inspired loosely by Cypherr's (on ao3!!) fic 'four's a family', that's where I got the idea of Phil just being overwhelmed because there's so many babies to deal w/, so I'm crediting them! Though, this fic is much different then their's, but also please go read their fics they're great- anyways, I hope you enjoy! This fic is kinda (?) in Ranboo's pov (third person but like,,,you see his thoughts), but there's so much going on that it kinda feels like it's jumping around? Sorry for that, I'm used to writing w/a 2 littles max per caregiver ratio, so this was different. I've also never written Phil as a caregiver before besides his brief appearance over in my 'Mister Nook' series. okay I'm done rambling,,,enjoy the fic please!

--

There was a very specific feeling that came to him when he met up with his friends. A weirdly comforting feeling, a reassurance that he had finally found his people.

In an internet dad, a fellow faceless streamer who used a pig as his icon, a song writer, a bee-loving teenager, and another who was known for wearing red and white. He felt just a bit out of place in this dynamic, SBI were the ones that were close. SBI plus Tubbo wasn't an odd pairing either, and it almost seemed as if Ranboo was only there because Tubbo was.

But that doubt seemed to wash away with the welcoming energy that the car ride to Phil and Kristin's home was filled to the very brim with. Tommy and Wilbur arguing like brothers while Ranboo and Tubbo joked about. The half-joking stern look that Phil gave him through the rear view mirror when he made an inappropriate joke. The soft feeling that Techno teasingly ruffling his hair left in his chest.

This group felt like family.

Of course, he had a perfectly good set of parents back home, but this was different. In a good way, though. This home wasn't his, it was Phil's, but he was surprisingly comfortable here. He was comfortable with his close friends.

"Breakfast is ready!"

He jolted awake with a slight shock when he heard knocking and shouting outside of the door of the room he was staying in, the noise startling him from his sleep. He rubbed at his eyes and stretched his arms above his head as the sleepiness started fading from his mind, clocking the voice as Tommy's as he processed his surroundings. It was his second day at the Philza Minecraft's, the first being made up of mostly content creation.

They had all been shown to their respective guest rooms late last night after quite a few movies and a half-asleep conversation full of laughing and heartfelt emotions. Today was supposed to be a chill day, and the next they'd be exploring the area just around Phil and Kristen's home. It was Ranboo's second time in the UK, and just like last time, he wanted to explore and get a feel for the place he'd be temporarily living in.

He fished some clothes out of his suitcase, pulling them on and discarding his pajamas in a white laundry hamper he had been given for that exact purpose. Then, he sat on the bed, pulling out his phone and scrolling through it. He chuckled as he saw a picture of their entire group with a fan they had run into the day prior, just after he was picked up from the airport, remembering how many similar ones had been taken during his last meet up.

He thought back to the months he spent at Tubbo's house just a while ago, it was one of the funnest parts of his life if he was honest, and now he was right back in the UK for another long meet up. This one was supposed to be a month, at least. SBI and the Bee Duo all under one roof for an entire month! Twitter had freaked out completely when they heard of this arrangement.

During his last trip to the UK, he found out something interesting after revealing something about himself to Tubbo. He admitted to his habit of age regressing to his friend during a late night conversation, only to be met with a 'me too' and then being asked if he wanted to call some friends. This response had confused him, but he said agreed, figuring that there had to be some logic to this.

And after an hour long conversation with Techno, Tommy, Wilbur, and Phil, he learned about an ongoing secret dynamic between the group. Tommy, Tubbo, Phil, and Wilbur were all also regressors. This was a lot of information to process at around 6 am during an all-nighter, but he was glad to know he wasn't alone.

Almost immediately after finding out about his headspace, Phil insisted on taking care of him, messaging him more often and helping him regress over video calls. And over the process of a few weeks, Ranboo had been officially added to the group of littles Phil cared for regularly.

The man took the time to learn his headspace range, things that upset him, how to deal with him when he did misbehave (though the occasion was rare, especially compared to someone like Little Tommy), all in the name of making sure he was cared for. It was sweet, really, and sometimes the boy felt bad for all the man did for him.

He pushed these thoughts away as he heard his name called by his father figure from the kitchen. He groaned, exiting off of Twitter and making his way out of the room and down the hallway, through the living room and into the kitchen. "I'm coming, I'm coming," he mumbled, still tired. He took his seat between Tommy and Tubbo after entering the kitchen/dining area and was quite overwhelmed with the amount of greetings and 'good morning!'s' he got all at once.

"How'd you sleep, hun?" he smiled when he heard Kristin's voice, humming a bit, settling on responding to her instead of facing the rest of the ongoing chaos in the kitchen.

"Pretty good, I think. Still waking up, though," he admitted. He watched the woman bring a plate over to him, setting a stack of pancakes in front of him. "Thank you."

Before she got the chance to respond, Tommy was shouting all to loud for how early it was in the morning. He sounded whiny, too. "Why does he get his first? I was awake before him," he complained, earning a response from Wilbur as he entered the room, his obviously messy hair temporarily contained by a beanie.

"Maybe because he's not throwing a fit over everything like you are," He made his way over to the table as Phil shot the both of them a look. Ranboo minded his own business, digging into his food, he knew that he wasn't in trouble. The brown haired man sat next to Tommy, leaning back in his seat casually.

"Will, be nicer to your brother. And Tommy, be patient, or else both of you will be put in timeout the moment we finish eating." he threatened, half joking.

"What?" Tommy said, sounding shocked as his eyes went wide.

"I second that, none of us are little!" Tubbo finally spoke up after laughing at the situation the whole time.

"Tom-tom here is sure acting like a baby, though," Wilbur teased, sitting back up to ruffle the blond's hair, continuing even when the younger whined and attempted to shove his hand away. He only retracted it when Phil gave him another stern look.

"Stop teasing him and eat your food," he told him as Kristin brought over plates for Tommy and Wilbur. "Where's Techno?" Phil seemed like he wanted to continue talking to Wilbur, but was distracted when he noticed that someone was missing. Wilbur smirked, sticking his tongue out to Tommy, as if bragging about being let off the hook.

Even Ranboo could admit, even out of headspace, everyone seemed to fill their roles in the family dynamic well. Wilbur was the cocky middle brother who somehow simultaneously gets in the most trouble and gets away with everything, Techno is the oldest who's mostly calm but will join in on the antics when it seems fun, and Tommy's the youngest who will play the 'innocent' card at any chance he could get.

Ranboo and Tubbo's exact roles were a bit undecided, but they seemed to consist of a lot of watching the scene play out and somehow getting dragged into an argument they had nothing to do with. Phil acted as their dad, who kept peace between everyone and tried to keep things calm, while Kristen played the role of a sweet mother-type figure.

When they were little, it was a bit different, but the general feeling of family remained the same.

After a few chaotic minutes of gathering everyone up and calming everyone down, they were all sitting around the table and talking in a much more civil manner. Things got loud once again only a few minutes later when Tommy knocked over his cup of orange juice.

"Sorry!" he squeaked, "I didn't mean to!" he defended, looking up at Phil apologetically. He immediately seemed much younger, a light pout on his lips as he apologized for his clumsiness.

"It's alright, Toms." the man assured, flashing a soft smile to let the regressor know that he was alright, reaching for the paper towels across the table. In just a few moments it was like there was never a spill in the first place. "Can you get him a sippy cup, please?" he asked Kristin, who immediately set off to get the requested item.

"I told you he was a baby," Wilbur spoke up next, predictably earning protests from the clearly regressing boy next to him.

"I'm not a baby!" the younger cried, looking to his other  "Techno, tell him I'm not a baby!"

"I mean, only babies need sippy cups," the other man leaned a bit closer the table, his words causing the teenager's eyes to widen.

"Can't Kristin just refill dis one?" he questioned, holding up the cup he had knocked over and looking to Phil hopefully.

"Sorry, buddy, I just don't want you to make another mess." Phil sighed, shooting a disappointed look towards Wilbur and Techno. Ranboo sunk further into his seat, trying to avoid getting pulled into the conflict. He wasn't sure how the others could handle Phil's 'disappointed look' so easily, the boy was very much scared of it.

"I'm not gonna!" Tommy whined, practically glaring at the cup that was set in front of him a moment later. He huffed and crossed his arms, refusing to drink or eat anything.

"This is what happens when you make fun of him, he gets all insecure and stubborn," Tubbo groaned, rolling his eyes as if they had been through this process a million times over.

"Tubbo's right, apologize to him," the oldest man ordered. Wilbur and Techno looked at him as if this suggestion was completely outrageous, so he added, "Now."

"Okay, okay!" Wilbur gave in, sounding defensive, "I'm sorry, Toms. You're not a baby."

"Really?" he lowered his arms, finally uncrossing them.

"No, you're just clumsy and we're sorry for making fun of you for it," Techno sounded very reluctant, but he followed Phil's orders. After these apologies, the rest of breakfast went fairly smoothly. By the end of it, Tommy was very obviously fully regressed and making a useless attempt to hide it.

It was a fairly often occurrence that Tommy slipped just for fun, acting and being treated like a kid was something he just liked. He got to be the annoying little brother and watch cartoons while he did it, it was a win-win across the board.

But Phil and Kristin knew, that whenever one of them slipped over their voice chats, anyone else in the discord call would too. And now, they were all actually together under one roof, so he was sure he'd have five littles to deal with by noon at latest.

--

As predicted, all of the boys ended up in littlespace, slipping one after another like a line of dominoes getting knocked over. After some reassurance from Phil, Tommy allowed himself to slip, and he dragged his best friend into a game of pretend. And the two toddler minded teenagers decided they wanted to play with Techno and Ranboo as well, and Wilbur soon followed when Phil babied him a bit to much.

At first, it was quite loud, and there was a lot of conflict and disagreements between the boys. Eventually, after everyone but Ranboo had managed to get in some sort of trouble, Phil sat the boys down to watch cartoons. Tommy, Tubbo, and Wilbur were out like a light one episode in. Wilbur was in babyspace, he always needed extra sleep, and Tommy tired himself out by crying when he assumed Phil was upset with him.

Tubbo, however, was just tired. No excuse, that's just how he was sometimes.

Ranboo and Techno were older then the rest of them, and far more behaved, so they didn't get quite as much attention earlier in the day. Phil was quite busy comforting Wilbur and trying to keep Tommy and Tubbo in check, and it didn't help that Kristin had to leave the house. To make up for this, Phil wanted to do something special with them while the other three took their mid-day naps.

After a while of Ranboo and Techno watching cartoons, trying to stay quiet so that their friends could sleep peacefully, Phil spoke up.

"Boys, quietly follow me," he whispered, managing to get out from under from where Wilbur was laying cuddling up to him without waking the boy up. Techno and Ranboo glanced at each other, seemingly confused but intrigued. They scrambled to get up, following their caregiver into the kitchen.

"What are we doin', dada?" Techno questioned once they entered the other room. They had left the cartoons on, so Phil was fairly sure they wouldn't be able to hear what was going on in the kitchen.

"You guys are gonna be my little helpers for snack time, okay? I got some special treats and such for everyone and we need to put everything together before everyone gets up!" the man explained in a quiet but excited tone, speaking even quieter as if his next words were a secret, "And if you guys do a good job, I'll even give you an extra cookie."

Ranboo's face immediately lit up, and he bounced on his feet as he awaited more instructions. Phil specifically chose him and Techno out of all of them, they must be special. It was like a super secret mission, just for them!

"So we're all gonna have fruit and vegetables before we get to the sweets," he continued on, going over the fridge and pulling out various fruits and vegetables, "Techno, could you wash the strawberries and blueberries for me?" he asked.

"Mhm!" he agreed, excited to be able to help. It seem weird that Phil's idea of "something special" was just putting them to work, it was more about the idea of making them feel special. They were more well behaved then everyone else, so they got extra time with Phil and a cookie.  

"What do I get to do?" Ranboo questioned. He watched as Technoblade took the containers with the fruit he was told to wash over to the sink.

"Are you big enough to pour drinks for everyone?" he questioned, pulling various new sippycups and bottles from a hidden spot in one of the cabinets. The two littles gasped, completely distracted from their tasks, "Yes, some of these are for you two." he chuckled at their excitement, coming over to Ranboo and holding out a simple but cute black and white sippy cup.

"I thought maybe you could put stickers on it," Phil explained. The boy nodded quickly, practically attacking him in a hug. "Okay, go on, get to work now." he said, motioning over to the counter where the rest of them sat.

As requested, they got to work. Techno helped wash the fruit and put then on their plates, while Ranboo filled the sippy cups and bottles with whatever drink each one of them liked best. His demise came when he tried to sneak soda into his sippy cup without asking, and he managed to spill it all over the counter.

"Uh oh! Spill on aisle Ranboo!" Phil joked, grabbing the paper towels and running over to help. Immediately, the boy panicked. He was the well behaved one, and Phil was gonna find out that he was trying to be sneaky! His guilt was obviously clear to the caregiver, because the next thing he said was, "Don't worry, accidents happen."

The gentle and reassuring tone he used only made him feel worse. It only took the man a moment to actually realize what the boy had been pouring into the cup. "Ranboooo," the caregiver held out his words, sounding disappointed, "You know that you could've asked for soda if you really wanted it, right? You've been so good all day, I would've given it to you."

"Really?" he asked, pouting when the man took the cup and dumped the liquid in the sink. He then ripped paper towels from the roll and wiped up the remainder of the drink from the counter.

"Yeah, I would've," Phil affirmed, "But trying to sneak around me isn't okay. You told me you were putting juice in here. That's lying, and I know for a fact that you're big enough to know that's not allowed. " he tsked, causing Ranboo to look down at his feet.

"M' sorry," he mumbled, ready to cry over such a small thing. He knew what he was doing was dumb, Phil rarely let them have sweets like that when they were small due to the fact that they got hyper.

"Don't cry, sweetheart, you're not in trouble," the man assured with a sigh, softening his tone immediately, rinsing the cup out as he spoke. Ranboo still felt bad, despite the gentle reassurance. He glanced up to see the man filling his cup with his favorite drink besides the over sugary soda: strawberry lemonade. "Here you go." he tightened the lid onto it and held it out for him.

"Sorry, dada," he apologized again, his eyes still glassy as he took it in his hands. Phil sighed a bit, opening his arms and pulling him close.

"You're okay, buddy, I promise you." he spoke gently, "Little boys make mistakes sometimes, it's alright." The man knew that while Ranboo might've been regressed to an older age, he was still quite sensitive, and he always felt overly bad whenever he got in trouble. Even if he had managed to get away with sneaking the soda, he would've owned up to what he did guiltily after just a few sips of the drink.

That's just how he was.

"M' all done!" Techno's voice interrupted them as he finished placing the snack-filled plates in their spot at the table, besides their respective sippy cups. Phil pulled away from the other regressor and ruffled his hair, smiling at him before addressing the other little.

"Good job, honey. You're such a good helper," he complimented, before looking back to Ranboo. "And so are you." he reminded. Ranboo giggled a bit, feeling happiness well up in his chest at the praise despite any childish guilt. The giggles only increased when his caregiver tapped the button of his nose, causing him to scrunch it up.

Once he was sure that Ranboo was alright, or at least doing a bit better, he gave them their next instructions. One good thing about Ranboo was that it was easy to sway his emotions to the more positive end if it was done before any tears came. "Take your seats and eat, I'm gonna wake up your brothers and have them pick up their toys from earlier, then they'll join you." he told them, before leaving the room.

Technoblade's eyes followed Phil as he exited the room, and he waited until he was sure he was out of earshot to say anything. "Psst, 'anboo," Techno leaned close to the table, grabbing the other boy's attention.

"Wha'?" he questioned, popping a grape in his mouth and tilting his head in curiousity.

"We should scare daddy when he comes back in! It'll be so cool," he suggested, "We can wait by the door and jump out!"

"Hmm...," Ranboo looked over to where the other pointed, considering his options, "We 'posed to be eatin'." he pointed out, shaking his head.

"We won' get in trouble, it's just playin' round," he tried to sound convincing. It seemed to work, because Ranboo reconsidered, before hesitantly nodding. He grabbed one more grape and his sippy cup before standing up, Techno leading him over to the entrance of the room. They were concealed behind the wall on either side of the doorway.

They listened Phil woke the others up and helped them put the toys away, excitement ramping up as they waited. To their shock, Tommy entered first, fully ready to greet him in his usual loud tone. Techno quickly put his finger to his lip, shaking his head to signal him to be quiet. Tommy's eyes widened as he realized what was happening, deciding to duck behind the with his older brother.

It was then that Phil entered, carrying Wilbur. The boys jumped out from their spots, exclaiming different variations of "boo!" and "AHH!", breaking out into giggles immediately after. Wilbur squeaked, the sound startling him a bit, but he didn't seem upset. "Well hello, little ones," Phil chuckled, "If I remember correctly, you boys are supposed to be at the table."

"Jus' wanted to scare you! We go eat now," Techno assured, taking Tommy's wrist in his hand and pulling him over to the table. Ranboo however, peeked behind Phil to see if Tubbo was coming.

"Where Tubs at?" he pulled on Phil's shirt before he could walk away, whining a bit.

"He had a bit of an accident," the man admitted, "He's a bit smaller now, but he'll be out soon, okay?"

"Okay..." he trailed off, looking out into the living room, completely set on standing there until his best friend was able to join him.

"How about you head over to the table, kiddo?" his caregiver questioned, earning a pout from the little. "Okay, okay, you can wait here for him!" he decided, figuring there was nothing wrong with it. With a forehead kiss, Phil left him at the doorway.

"Tubbo! We gots apple slices for you!" he rambled excitedly when his friend finally did arrive, running towards him and grabbing his hand. He started to pull him further into the kitchen, but the mentally younger of the two stumbled a bit, seemingly clumsier then he was earlier in the day.

Ranboo realized that he had a pacifier in his mouth now, and he saw Phil replacing his sippy cup with a bottle out of the corner of his eye. He had worked hard to put apple juice in that sippy cup, he thought, pouting a bit.

"M' sorry, didn' mean to make you almost fall! We can go slow," he decided, earning a thankful smile from the other regressor. "Are you gonna say anything?" he asked, walking beside him. As they approached the table, Phil replied for the boy.

"He's a bit younger, bud, he might not be up for talking," he explained, "You know what it's like to be so little that you feel like a baby. Can we all be understanding? He's only a bit older then Wilbur at the moment." "

Tubbo seemed quite embarrassed as he sunk into his seat, pulling his pacifier from his mouth to eat his food. There were sounds of agreement around the table. Ranboo was curious as to what exactly made Tubbo slip so much younger then he usually did, but he didn't voice this curiosity, settling on eating his food in favor of not embarrassing his friend anymore then he already was. .

"These are yucky!" Tommy claimed, pushing his plate with carrots and ranch away from him.

"You like carrots and ranch, what are you talking about?" Phil sounded tired and just a bit annoyed.

"Don' want em," he shook his head, whining just as he had that morning when Wilbur teased him.

"If you eat them you'll get a cookie," the caregiver bribed.

"What type of cookie?" the toddler minded boy squinted his eyes, as if considering this, as if it was a negotiation of sorts.

"Sugar cookie, chocolate chip, I think we have Oreos too...whatever you could want," this definitely caught the boys interest.

"Chocolate chip?" his eyes went wide with excitement, which was only intensified when Phil nodded. Immediately, he uncrossed his arms and pulled his plate back towards him. Phil seemed satisfied with this, ruffling his hair.

The boys were still waking up, so Phil asked them to talk about their elaborate games from earlier in the day to keep them occupied. So, as they ate their snacks, they giggled about imaginary wars and adventures and argued over who won their dramatic plastic sword duels. Eventually, the caregiver gave them their promised sweets before sending them back off to play.

"Ranboo, you left your sippy cup in the kitchen," Phil tapped the boy's shoulder and distracted him from his game of peek-a-boo with Tubbo. He quickly discovered that his friend seemed much to little to participate in any games he'd usually play, so he did what he always saw Phil do with Wilbur: play a simpler one.

It was obviously much more entertaining for the littler of the two, but Ranboo was happy to hear his friend's giggles and squeaks. "Oh! Thanks, dada!" the boy reached up to take his sippy cup from the caregiver as he was sitting on the floor and Phil was standing. Ranboo gasped when he took a drink, feeling bubbles on his tongue.

Immediately, Phil put a finger to his lips and gave him a warning look. This made the boy giggle a bit as he nodded, understanding the signal. "Thank you!" he repeated, smiling when his hair was ruffled softly. The moment didn't last long, Tommy called Phil over for something, and it was back to peek-a-boo with his best friend.

Ranboo didn't mind it, though, peek-a-boo was fun. Being with everyone was fun, even if it meant he got a bit less attention due to there being so much going on. It all evened out, he got to be a snack time helper! And he got an extra cookie! If you asked him, that was pretty awesome.

In the next few days, they'd all get back into making more collaborative content, as that was the point of this meet up, but for now, it was just time to play. To spend time together, to cuddle, and giggle, and make far to much noise in the name of fun. To just be a family.

That was the specific feeling that came to Ranboo with this meet up. The comforting feeling that bubbled in his chest whenever he got a forehead kiss or his hair ruffled by Phil, or when he played babyish games with his friends when they regressed younger then him.

This was the thing that clouded his mind whenever he regressed with this group specifically, or when they were in the car, joking about anything and everything as they got closer and closer to their destination. A feeling that consistently made his life better, the feeling that brought a smile to his face everyday...

The Feeling of Family.

--

A/N: I really hope you liked that adorable mess of 4500 words! I appreciate reblogs and likes, but no matter what, thanks for reading to the end! Did you like the chaotic feeling that five littles/so many people brought into my fic? I kinda had to switch up my normal formulas to make room for so many characters, there's a reason I literally put three character to sleep halfway through the fic hjsikajsa. Did I write Phil well? I tried to portray how a caregiver w/so many littles would act somewhat realistically? Kind of overwhelmed but managing. Also, did you like me portraying ranboo as 'the angle little' of the group? idk I felt like it fit his personality in the scenario. If you reply with/send an ask/reblog with feedback, you can answer those questions, leave a request for something (whether it be in the universe father into the month-long meetup timeline I set up or just another fic), state your general opinions on the fic, or just leave a strand of emojis if words are hard. No matter what, it means a lot! I hope you all have a great day!!!!

[allsevenmaidens]

Marching Band AU

@elsie-writes inspired me, so here's MORE (didn't want to double the length of their post):

-Penny is saxophone section leader, and Riz absolutely chose the sax and marching band because of her. That, and so he could learn gritty film noir songs

-Riz plays alto sax and is tiny enough his first year that he has to march with a harness and not a neckstrap (harnesses distribute the weight of the instrument across your shoulders and back, neckstraps have it all resting on your neck- really, a saxophone's weight when you march is mostly held up by your right arm, with the sax resting on your right thumb.)

-Riz and Penny get super competitive over who has the worst tan lines. They never take off their neckstraps or gloves and they wear mid calf socks with shorts. Sklonda begs them both to reapply their sunscreen throughout the day.

-Ragh plays tuba!! And he makes walking around with a full tuba on his shoulder look easy.

-Adaine plays mello. Aelwyn is an orchestral french horn player, Adaine has been taking french horn lessons for years. Their parents heard it was the most difficult brass to play. Adaine bombed her youth orchestra audition, saw a notice for marching band, and figured it was better than nothing. First rehearsal, the band director signed her out a mellophone (french horn equivalent in marching band, looks like a big trumpet). She's never looked back, and she is thriving being able to pour her air into playing out loud and proud on an outdoor field. Adaine starts off with a horrible horn angle but eventually is one of the most solid members in the band. (That's how Adaine gets strong!)

-Gorgug has an out of the full-band physical warmup to tune the drums. Picture a tall teenager surrounded by a circle of drums of all shapes and sizes. He hits one a few times, looks thoughtfully, continues hitting it and turns some imperceptible screw, hits the drum at the same time as the drum next to it, shakes his head, adjusts the screw and continues on to the next drum. If anyone's instrument breaks, they take it straight to him.

-Gorgug helps tape the field. He's always there early because he and Zelda carpool and if he's there then he's helping the drum major team.

-Fabian has been known to show up with coffee for his whole section on mornings when they're loading the buses for parades especially early

-they only do trumpet duets in their shows, never solos, because whenever they tried Fig and Fabian got super competitive and showed off a ton in their solo auditions and then separately went to the band director to forfeit and begged them to give it to the other person because they've been working so hard and they really deserve it.

-Gorthalax drives the equipment trailer

-field show themes include "Dragon's Curse" and "Journey Through the Nightmare Forest"

-Ostentatia Wallace and Sam Nightingale are the heads of band council- they throw the best bonding events and resolutely turn down Fig and Kristen's requests for thongs as bandwear every. single. year. PLEASE stop submitting that, there are children present. (They pretend they mean toe thongs for the winterguard, but no one here was born yesterday.)

-they all sleep in a school gym for a week when the band is out of town every summer and Fabian and Ragh get tents banned for everyone

-Fig and Adaine and Kristen and Tracker hypothetically all have their own beds, but what they really have is a shared air mattress island where they all snuggle

-The chaperones are always weary when they figure out room assignment requests for band camp. People who want to room with a friend or two aren't usually a problem. Seven best friends usually are, especially when the eighth person on their rooming request is Tracker, and they've already made covert plans that she and Kristen are going to alternate whose room they stay in each night.

-guard meetings run late after every rehearsal and they're the last ones in the block before parades because Kristen gives long rambling pep-talks (?) reminders (?)

-Fig and Fabian are in crisis mode over how to get Torek, their trumpet first year who is way cooler than them and already super good at marching somehow, to respect them

-Zelda can go down the horn line (literally you put all of your instruments on the ground in a line, sorted by section) and list off who every single instrument belongs to

-Gorgug and Zelda sit together on the bus to performances and watch DCI shows and discuss score increases between competitions in great detail (part of the reason Zelda learned to spin was because she can't join drum corps on flute)

-Tracker and Ragh are bassline buddies and bonded because tubas and bari saxes play a lot of the same parts and march near each other in field shows

-Kristen's little brothers were the banner carriers for a while (usually non-band members, they walk at the front of the band in parades and carry a banner with the band's logo)

(Band is great and I don't talk about it enough! I did 5 years, and spent 2 as saxophone section leader. Or, as I liked to call it, "saxtion leader.")

[buckyspetpsychopath]

We’re perfect

David dobrik x reader

Vlog squad

A/N: this was requested, and I wrote this from my phone notes so I hope this is ok! 😊

Masterlist

I open the door to David’s house instantly hearing the laughter and chatter. I smile and walk in and over the the living room where everyone was sprawled out. Carly is the first to notice me there and smiles, getting up to hug me. I go around the room giving people hugs after not seeing them for a week. When I make it to David the first thing I notice is his pissed off expression. Everyone falls back into their own conversations as I sit myself down on davids lap like I usually do.

“What are you doing here?” He hisses and I’m a little taken back.

“Uhm I texted you. But you didn’t respond and I saw on Instagram that people were here and I haven’t seen you for a couple days so I thought I’d come over.” I mumble and he scoffs.

“When I didnt respond wasn’t that an indicator that I didn’t want you to come. You’re always here, I need some space” he whines pushing me off him onto the couch next to him. My eyes fill with tears but I look away from him.

“Fine, whatever have your space I don’t care” I hiss back at him quietly before standing up. I cough a little to choke back my tears. “Uhm. I just realised, Ive got somewhere I need to be and I’m gonna be late so I’ll see you guys later” I announce to everyone and a round of see you laters arise.

“Will we see you tonight?” Corinna asks and my eyebrows furrow in confusion.

“Tonight?” I trail off and everyone seems to look at each other oddly.

“The party? Here...” heath exclaims, assuming I’d know there was a party thrown by my boyfriend at his house. I clench my jaw and look towards David. He sinks deeper into the cushions and I scoff.

“Oh yeah. I forgot. Uhm, I’ll try and make it over” I say and everyone woohs. David makes no effort to say goodbye to me so I storm out the door and go home.

I spend the next few hours getting ready, making sure to look extra good. When it’s time to go I uber over to davids, not taking the chance of driving and being too drunk to drive home. The music is thumping as I step out of the Uber, thanking the driver. I walk up the path and open the door. The party was in full swing. A lot of people fill the house making it smell of sweat, alcohol and pizza but it’s nice. Everyone is chatting or dancing. I look around for David but can’t seem to find him when I feel a tap on my back. I turn around and my eyes widen. One of my best friends from back home is standing in front of me.

“Dylan!” I squeal and dive into his arms. He spins me around and I giggle. He sets me down again and I furrow my eyebrows. “Not that I’m not excited you’re here but why are you here?” I question and he smirks holding his hand up. I see a ring on his engagement finger and my jaw drops. Him and his boyfriend have been dating for around 5 years- high school sweethearts I guess.

“I’m engaged bitch” he grins and I jump up and down like a kid.

“Wait what? When? How? Who proposed to who? I better be a bridesmaid” I ramble and he holds my shoulders stopping me from talking. I had caught the attention of a couple of people and they look over curiously.

“I proposed to him and obviously he said yes. Of course you’re my best man- woman” he says and I grin flinging my arms around him.

“Where is Adam?” I ask before I feel arms wrap around my waist spinning my around. I squeal and laugh as they set me down. I turn and see Adam with three plastic cups in his hand.

“Hey, I was getting us drinks” he smiles and then sees liquid on the floor that used to be in the cups from when he spun me around. He shrugs and wraps his arm around me looking down at me. “Did he tell you?” He asks and I nod.

“Congratulations” I smile hugging him properly.

“We need to get a picture so I can post my congrats on Instagram” I laugh and they roll their eyes. We go off to find a nice place for a picture. I call Natalie over as she is closest to me and ask her to take a couple pictures, she agrees immediately.

We take one normal smiling photo before we take a couple goofy ones. We finally take one that we’re all happy with and thank natalie.

“Hey, who are those guys?” Mariah asks.

“Ohh. It’s not like that. They’re gay, they’ve just gotten engaged! They’re my friends back home. I don’t know who invited them here but here they are” I smile.

“Oh. I mean we knew you’d never cheat on David but it looked a bit suspicious until you explained” Liza exclaims and I laugh.

“No other than a real drunk night in high school involving a game of truth or dare when Dylan and I had to kiss- there’s nothing there, he’s completely gay and infatuated with Adam.” I grin.

“And you’re too infatuated with David to even comprehend the glares he’s sending you right now” Kristen giggles pointing behind me at David, who was in fact staring at me angrily. He rolls his eyes when we make eye contact and stumbles off with his camera.

I sigh and follow after him. He stands alone in a secluded part of the kitchen.

“Hey I was looking for you where have you been” I smile trying to lighten his mood.

“Sure, you didn’t seem to be looking for me. Had your hands all over those guys. I mean what the fuck. If you’re gonna cheat on me, don’t do it right under my fucking nose. Wait until your in private, slut” he spits and my eyes widen. He bumps my shoulder roughly as he passes me and makes me topple over, slicing my palm open.

“Wow David calm down bro” heath jumps between us.

“David, you need to go cool off” zane pushes him away as he stands looking at me angrily, unfazed by my bleeding hand. Natalie rushes over with a kitchen towel wrapping it around my hand. I look at David hurtfully.

“What the fuck? I didn’t do anything wrong. If you took any notice of me at all you’d know they’re my friends-who are gay and also engaged. You’ve been too busy ignoring me all night and for the past week at that. If you’re gonna break up with me just do it like a man. Now. Don’t be a pussy and drag it out” I yell at him. His eyes widen and he steps towards me, I flinch and move behind Scott. The most pain I’ve ever seen flashes behind davids eyes in that moment.

“Are you scared of me?” He mumbles. By now, the music had been turned off and everyone was watching our argument. I avoid eye contact with him as a tear slips out. My hand is throbbing and I look down at it, the blood has soaked throw the towel.

“Fuck, can someone please help me clean my hand” I sob. A couple people step foraward but David beats them to it.

“Let me do it” he states. Zane and Scott look at me for confirmation. “Oh come on. I’m not gonna hurt her.” He groans. “Just let me help you, please” he chokes out, looking directly at me now. I bite my lip and nod. We silently go into the bathroom as he seats me on the counter. He closes the door and reaches down under the sink to retrieve the first aid kit. He pulls out the supplies and silently starts cleaning the cut. I hiss but he continues.

“I’m sorry” he whispers.

“That’s your apology” I roll my eyes.

“I wasn’t finished.” He grits. “Im sorry for how I’ve been treating you, it was killing me ignoring you.” He states.

“Then why were you? And what’s with all the stuff tonight, you’d know I’d never cheat on you”

“I just... it’s gonna sound so stupid.” He sighs running a hand through his hair. He’d finished bandaging my hand now, it wasn’t deep enough to need stitches, so I put my hand on his cheek. He sighs leaning into my touch. “I was avoiding you, and being mean to you because I was falling for you -way too hard and way too quick.” He exclaims and I stay silent, nodding for him to continue. “I just... with Liza, it took me so long to fall in love. Not for any reason, we just took things slow. And she’s the only real girlfriend I’ve ever had. Then when I met you, I fell so so hard. I couldn’t stop thinking about you. And I got scared, things were moving too quick between us, I panicked” he shrugs.

“I think things are just fine. So what if we’re moving a little fast, we’re at the right pace for us” I smile softly.

“I know it’s only been 4 months but I’m in love with you” He whispers.

“I’m in love with you too” I whisper back after a moment of processing his words. He looks relieved as he places a deep kiss on my lips. “I’ve missed that” he grins moving into kiss me again. We pull away from each other with little grins that cannot seem to leave our faces. I hop off the counter and lace my non bandaged hand in his as we leave the bathroom. Our immediate friend group are sat in the living room- most likely trying to hear our conversation and hopefully failing. Everyone else had left.

“We sent them home” Todd speaks up when they see our confusion. We both nod and David pulls his hand away from mine, wrapping his arm around my shoulder and pulling me close to him. He leaves a kiss on my forehead as a small grin makes its way onto my face.

“Sooo you guys are ok?” Carly asks, speaking up for everyone. I look up at David and smile making him lean down and kiss my nose.

“Yeah were good” I confirm and everyone let’s out a sigh of relief.

“I thought we were gonna have to choose between you guys and I couldn’t do that” zane sighs dramatically making me giggle.

“We’re good” I repeat looking up at David again.

“We’re perfect” davids smiles pulling me close to him again. A warmth spreads through my chest and I feel like a little girl who’s crush just admitted that he likes her back- all giddy. Everyone starts filing out and then it’s just me, David and natalie. Natalie heads to her room and David and I head off to bed.

“What you’re not gonna edit anything?” I ask, which is seemingly all he does lately, he barely sleeps. He shakes his head.

“I don’t have to post until tomorrow, and I wanna spend some time with my girl tonight” he states, bringing my hand up to press a kiss to my bandage and I blush. The warmth rising in my chest again and butterflies rushing through my stomach when he calls me his girl.

“I love you” I whisper.

“Im never gonna get tired of hearing that, i love you too, let’s go to sleep” he laughs pulling me over to his bed to cuddle.

[fathertaurus]

Kitten (part 1) - ⛈️

JAJDOSJDJSJSNZJD I’m so excited. So, if you don’t know, I originally wrote a sugar daddy! David smut and then a stripper!reader smut. I kept coming up with new ways to keep both stories going, and decided to keep going with the sugar daddy one because that one got more of a response, BUT then an idea for a scene of angst (not in this part) came to me with the reader being his sugar baby and a stripper and I decided to combine the two stories. This is the beginning, it’s very slow, nothing really happens except meeting most of the VS. as always, this is trash but I hope you guys enjoy. also s/o to that one anon that said Kitten as her stripper name cause I fuCKING CHOKED!!

“Babygirl!” Zane calls through your apartment, you hear that door slam close and footsteps coming through towards you’re living room. You pop your head around the corner seeing that Heath is with him too.

“What’s up guys?” you ask. You had given them a key to your apartment for emergencies only, but they never really used it for that.

“Wanna go to a party with us tonight?” asks Heath.

“Ugh guys, I’ve worked all week and was technically supposed to work today-”

“But you aren’t and you’re not staying in! When was the last time you partied?” Zane interrupts.

“Yesterday, when I was working! My feet hurt and I’m tired guys, maybe next time.” you whine. Both boys shake their heads and look at each other and back to you.

“You’re going, that’s final.” says Heath. He turns to your bedroom and walks in Zane following after.

“Hey! What are you doing!?” you yell, shooting up from your spot to follow them through your door.

“Looking for something for you to wear!” Zane says. They go through your clothes deciding some pieces were too revealing or not revealing enough. Heath pulls out a sheer diamond studded top gasping.

“This! You’re wearing this honey!” he shouts.

“Oh my God that would go so good with those thigh high boots I bought last week! Oh and black jeans, I can wear a fur coat, or is that extra- wait I’m not going!” you ramble. They laugh at you and Zane throws a pair of dark black jeans at you.

“Yes you are. Now get ready, we have to be there in an hour.”

You spend the next hour doing your hair and makeup, making sure you looked good, your tiredness faded away and was replaced by excitedness. You didn’t get to go out often, only really partying at the club when you were working, and you were ready to have a night with your friends and meet new people. Zane opens the bathroom door as your finished putting in some diamond studs into your ear piercing.

“I gotta pee babe.” he says and goes to the toilet. “You look good, oh my! Were you being serious about the fur coat?”

You turn back to the mirror making sure you didn’t miss a hair or anything, “I don’t know, it’s my first time meeting your friends. I don’t want to overwhelm them or make them think I’m snobbish.”

“I think you should wear it. It’s apart of your personality, and honestly they’ll probably love it.” he says finishing up and flushing the toilet, he walks to the sink and washes his hands, “Plus, imagine the type of impression you’ll make? Dripping in diamonds and wear a fur coat? A queen.”

You giggle, “Yeah I guess. Black or white?”

“Heath! Black or white coat to go with miss thangs outfit?” Zane yells, grabbing your hand and dragging you out the bathroom.

“White, it’ll give you a sense of purity. And you can yell at someone for stepping on it and make it a bigger deal.” he says. You throw your head back laughing.

“If someone steps on my coat or my shoes I’m fighting, period.” you say still laughing. You go back to your room and grab a long white fur coat from your closet, then reach under your bed for your shoe box. You slide the boots up your thigh, zip the side, repeating the action to the other side, then slip on the coat. Looking on your full length mirror you think you look extra, a diamond studded sheer shirt, white fur coat, thigh highs, and diamond covered jewelry? It’s a little much, but that’s your personality. You go to your dresser sliding on a few rings and a heavy silver necklace with diamonds glittering everywhere and walk back to your living room where Zane and Heath wait.

“Damn bitch! You look like a real rich bitch!” Heath says, making you snort.

“Is the fur real?” he asks.

“God no, I would never.” you place your hand over your heart mocking offensive. He rolls his eyes at your dramatics.

“Okay, let’s go. We’re already running late!” Zane ushers us out of my apartment. We make our way to the garage and hop into Zane’s G-Wagon.

“You gotta let me drive GiGi one day, I kinda want one.” you say.

“Oh for sure, yeah.” he says.

“I thought you wanted a Tesla?” Heath questions.

“Yeah i still do but I want to test drive one first and I don’t know if they allow that at the dealership.”

“One if our friends has a Tesla, we could ask him to let you test it out.” he says.

“You know David isn’t going to let her drive his car, he doesn’t even let us.” Zane says laughing.

“That’s because we’re boys, she’s a pretty girl. He’ll probably let her do whatever she wants just for smiling.” he says while rolling down his window and blowing vape smoke out.

“I’d do a lot more than smile to test out his car.” you say. Zane lets out a loud laugh and Heath starts choking on smoke. You guys start talking about the club and how you’re getting more tips and they talk about vlogging and their friends.

“You should pick up a Vlog camera, y/n. People would probably be interested in the daily life of a LA stripper.” says Zane.

“Oh yeah”, you snort “waking up at 1pm, eating leftovers, showering and then getting all dolled up just to sweat it all off on a pole. Real interesting.”

“Then do beauty videos, show people how to do your dramatic ass looks. You’ll put Jeffree Star and James Charles to shame.” adds Heath.

“You just should put videos up, you have such an amazing personality and people would love you. Hell our fans love when you join coffee talk!” says Zane.

“Maybe, I just don’t know where I’d begin. And then if someone finds out what club I work at then what?”

“It’s not like they could get in, most of them would probably be under age.”

“Exactly, then I’d be considered a bad role model.”

Zane looks back to you through the rearview mirror “Are you ashamed of your job?”

“No, bu-”

“Then who gives a fuck? Do YouTube if you want, we both think you should. We’ll help you pick out equipment and set up and edit. It’ll be a bonding experience!” Heath says, turning in his seat to look back at you. You throw your head back and sigh.

“I’ll think about it.” they cheer from the front and start talking about the best cameras for you to use and you roll your eyes. Minutes later you’re pulling up to a mansion, Zane parks his car on the street lined up with cars. You hop out the backseat, closing the door and straighten out your clothes. You feel the vibrations of the music as you walk around the car standing in between the two.

“Okay, if for any reason you feel uncomfortable and want to go home, tell me and we’ll go home. Don’t take drinks from strangers, don’t go anywhere with someone you don’t know. If you feel like someone is getting a little to close just punch them, if you feel like something happened to your drink but you drank it already go to the nearest room and lock yourself in and text us. If you-”

“Jesus Zane! I’m 21, and work at a freaking strip club. I’ll be fine. Since when did you become daddy bear?” you laugh.

“Actually, we prefer brother bears but whatever.” says Heath. You guys start walking towards the house and he holds the door open for you. You’re immediately engulfed in the sound and smell of the party, beer cans and red cups littering the floor and smoke coming from all directions.

“Remember what I said!” Zane leans down and shouts in your ear, you nod your head. You feel Heath’s hand snake into yours and pull you along, reaching back you grab Zane’s and pull him too. Heath’s leading you out the back door to the backyard.

“Carly said they were back here, let’s go find them and introduce you to everyone.” he shouts over the music. You start to get nervous, Zane and Heath were your only real friends in LA, all others were fake or stopped hanging out with you once they found out that you strip, you were scared that their friends weren’t going to like you and that would be it.

“Heath! Zane!” a girl shouts, you look over and see a short girl with short red hair waving you guys over. You guys make you way, the boys hugging her when you reach her.

“Carly! How are you babe?” Zane asks, moving to stand on the side of you.

“I’m good, how about you guys?”

“We’re good. Oh! This is our friend that we’re always talking about, y/n” say Heath.

She smiles at you and opens her arms for a hug you step forward and are engulfed in her embrace. “It’s so good to finally meet you! We were beginning to think you didn’t exist.” she laughs.

“It’s nice to meet you too!” you say.

“Where’s everyone else?” asks Heath.

“Oh, some are sitting over here . Others are walking around filming bits . They can never just relax, always have to have a camera attached to their hand.” she says rolling her eyes. She starts walking back towards a few people sitting on some couches, a boy with blonde hair and a nose piercing and has his arm thrown over a girl with brown hair and a nose piercing. On the opposite couch there’s a boy with dark hair and a girl with blonde hair holding hands. There’s a few other people scattered about that you recognize.

“Alright! Introductions!” shouts Zane. He starts pointing at people and naming them. “Scotty Sire, and Kristen McAtee vlog squads only functioning couple.” he points blonde boy and his girlfriend, you wave and they wave back. “That’s Todd Smith and Corinna Kopf, our very own drama series.” he points to the opposite couch, the guy flips him off and the girl waves at you. “That over there is Erin Gilfoy, her and Carly are best friends. The guy standing next to her is Alex Ernst, you probably know him as the Doritos guy.”

“The one from the vine!?” you ask.

“The one and only.” you throw your head back laughing.

“You’re friends with Doritos guy and didn’t tell me, I would have came sooner.” the rest laugh along with you.

“I don’t know where everyone else is and I’m not chasing them down looking so this is your group for the night. I’m gonna go get a drink, stay here.” Zane says and drags Heath along with him. Kristen pats the open spot next to her.

“Sit here.” she says and moves over to give you more room. You sit and smile at her in thanks.

“So how do you know Zane and Heath?” Todd asks, leaning forward.

“Oh I’m used to live nextdoor to them, one night they were like, insanely drunk, and trying to open my apartment. I was terrified at first and didn’t want to open the door but when Heath started singing some country rap song I dragged them inside and let them sleep in my living room. Been friends ever since.” They all laugh at the story finding it hilarious.

“Yeah, that sounds like them.” he says.

“Are you a YouTuber?” asks Kristen.

“Nope, I’m a stripper.” you say casually. Scott laughs loudly while Todd chokes on his sip of beer.

“I knew you had to be a stripper, that fur coat is beautiful and extra.” says Corinna as she rubs his back trying to calm him down.

“It’s not real fur, is it?” asks Kristen.

“No, it’s not. And thanks, I was going for the extra vibe tonight, hence the whole outfit.” you gesture to your necklace and shirt.

“That’s good, where’d you get it?” asks Corinna.

“This one I believe I got in London from Jakke.”

“You’ve been to London?” Scott asks and you nod. “How was it?”

“Cold and rainy.” you say laughing “but really fun. I would love to go back.” For the next few minutes you sit talking about places you’ve been and where you want to go, you learn that they’re all YouTubers and that Scott makes music and is going on tour soon. Alex and Erin join in the conversation and Zane and Heath come back with bottles of beer and a handle of vodka.

“Let’s get fucking drunk!” they screamed. The next hour and a half is full of conversation and drinking, some people leaving to dance and others coming back after getting footage for their videos. You meet Durte Dom and BigNik,Dom already trying t o make a move on you but you quickly shut him down. You were now sitting down in between Zane and Heath as Zane talks, waving his hands about wildly telling a story. Your head is resting on Heath’s shoulder, and you’re falling asleep when a boy with all black, even a black baseball cap, on and a camera in his hand walks up.

“Heath, can you come film a bit with me really quick?” he asks.

“Uh I don’t know, I think y/n is sleeping on me.” you sit up and shake your head.

“Go ahead I’ll just fall asleep on Zane.” you say.

“Actually, you wanna come film it with us? I need a girl for it.” he asks. You look up at him taking him in, he’s cute, in a dorky way.

“Are you going to pay me?” you ask and Heath chuckles.

The boy looks you up and down and scoffs “I don’t think you need me to pay you, sweetheart.”

“I might not need it, but I want it.” you stare at him and he stares at you, quirking up an eyebrow at the very obvious double meaning. You don’t know where this random burst of confidence came from. Heath clears his throat interrupting the weird staring contest.

“Let’s go so we can get you home baby girl. I think you’ve had a little too much to drink tonight.” Heath reaches for you hand and pulls you up dragging you to the front the house. It takes a few minutes for you guys to understand what to do and then a few takes to get it right. By the time you’re done Zane is walking out calling for you guys to hurry up so you can go.

You turn back to the boy. “Well I hope you got the footage you need.”

“I did, thanks. My name’s David by the way.” he looks down messing with something on the camera.

“My friends call me y/n, but the special ones call me Kitten.” you say, suddenly confident again. His head shoots up and opens his mouth and closes it again thinking of something to say, but you’re already walking away.

“See you around, David.” you call over your shoulder. You get into Zane’s car, him and Heath already inside.

“What did you say to the poor boy?” asks Zane.

“My name. And my other name.” you say looking out the window at the boy still standing dumbfounded. They both start laughing loudly and the car pulls off as you join them.

[gotham-city-tales-blog]

Edward Nygma Imagine: "For Now"

Requests: (1) Could you do an imagine about Edward Nygma being too shy to talk to you so he sends anonymous letters and one day you catch him dropping them off? (2) Hello, is it cool if you write a fic where the reader is just hired to work in the records annex and one day she's doing work while dancing and singing to herself and Ed catches her and just watches her in the doorway!!  (3) Okay so I’ve literally never requested anything before but could I please request a season 1 Ed x Reader? Maybe something like the reader is a flirt and thinks Ed’s cute and he doesn’t really know how to react? (4) Could you make an Edward Nygma imagine where the reader catches him in the act of disposing of the body of Tom or Kristen? [by anon & anon & anon]

Summary: an unrequited love story is resolved when you help Ed cover up one of his earliest murders.

One night while you were working late with Lee, she ran to get coffee. Alone in the office, you turned on your radio and let your hair down for a bit. You were an assistant to Lee an tonight was inventory night. The both of you would be pulling an all-nighter to document every scalpel and pill, re-file cases as cold and so on. 

With a night full of administrative duties, you were both fading fast. So you forked over the cash and Lee went on the coffee run. 

Pushing at the window which had been painted shut a long time ago, it opened outward just enough for you to look below at the city streets. The radio hummed in the background, the offices of the precinct silent for the night. As you looked down and out the window, you saw taxis driving by, honking their horns relentlessly. People were shouting from far away and the lights were still bright against the late night sky. 

Walking across the room, you pulled a cigarette from the pocket of your jacket. Swaying your head to the music, you hummed along to the melody as you lit your bog and turned up the music. 

Embracing your few moments of freedom, you swayed and hummed to the music as you subconsciously dragged on your cigarette, listening to the notes of the music dripping like honey over the distant city noises. 

Edward stood and watched you all those nights ago. He watched your lips exhale the smoke and your lips purse, he focused on how your hair fell over your shoulders and back again as you move your body to the beats. Your long skirt swayed effortlessly between your legs and around your graceful feet. 

From that night on, he was captivated by you-everything about you. 

Every three or four days a letter awaited you at your desk outside the coroner’s office. It had been happening for about three weeks but you hadn’t told anyone-well, except Lee. She saw them every morning, she always got to work early.

They weren’t long, just a simple quote or a picture of a famous painting. It was always something of simple intrigue that made your day. Small notes tucked away in mini envelopes. Occasionally a heart adorned them, sometimes a dove an then sometimes nothing.

You still didn’t know who was sending them but that didn’t mean you wouldn’t keep looking.

You had suspected either Gordon or Nygma but eventually concluded it was neither. 

You were friendly and men tended to take that the wrong way. Always making the assumption you were a flirt, many of the men in blue had made advances. But you weren’t flirting. You were just being nice, making conversation. Gordon was the only officer you assumed capable of such a subtle and sweet act, but after much deliberation you decided you were incorrect.

Gordon was too smart to mistake your kindness, besides, you were close with Lee. Jim could be obtuse, but never on purpose. He wasn’t a deliberate fire starter.

You had hoped maybe Edward was behind it but eventually decided against it. 

When you started at the GCPD, you had instantly clicked with Ed. Seeing as you both worked closely on cases, a lot of time was spent in each other’s vicinity. You bantered back and forth, exchanging jokes and riddles. You loved spending time with him but he never made any kind of move or reference to the notes you were receiving anonymously. 

So, despite your hopes, you moved on with your little investigation and remained by Ed’s side as a loyal friend.

What you didn’t know was that every single day Edward was falling deeper and deeper in love with you.

He saw how all of the men looked at you. They admired you and could woo you, they could literally sweep you off your feet-him, not so much. He saw how you spoke with them, paying them attention and laughing at their jokes. Your smile was so relaxing and appeared with such ease.

The relationship between you both was effortless and he wouldn’t do anything to risk you. You’d complained about men and their unwanted advances before-he didn’t want to become another creep on that list. 

Everyday he worked with you he wanted to tell you how he felt, he wanted to scream it from the roof tops. But he felt he couldn’t compare. So he grinned and bared it, expressing his compassions anonymously and remaining by your side as a loyal companion. 

That loyalty was eventually tested.

After working late one night and locking up after Lee, you stumbled upon Edward Nygma, drenched in blood, pushing a body into his trunk.

You parked across the street from the precinct in order to avoid any awkward run-ins with flirty policemen. Crossing an alley you of course recognized Ed, but only by his appearance.

Already nervous, upon seeing you he became manic.

He didn't approach you instead try to convince you not to run, but never once inching closer to you.

You knew Ed. You trusted him. So you waited.

When you didn't argue he stammered on in your silence explaining how this was a dirty officer. He found him stalking women, five including you.

He had hurt one of them and Ed confronted him but all he did was try and hurt Edward.

So Edward killed him.

No, not the most rational thing. But this was Ed.

So you helped him in a haze.

“I-Is your place safe?” Your words were coming out quick, you weren’t even processing what you were saying. “We can go back to my place but people could see us-and oh God the blood, what if-”

“We can go to my apartment.” He gently silenced your rambling with his suggestion. “No one will see us, I’ll make sure.” His words were confident, his tone soft. He was scared for you. He couldn’t tell what you were thinking, of him, of yourself, your job or the law. He was in the dark as you silently rode back to his abode next to him. 

As he drove, you remained silent, processing everything you had just witnessed and taken a part in. As you stared out the windshield, the lights passing in gleams, a small note on the dashboard stood out to you. 

Tucked between the dashboard and the air vent, a small white envelope was crumpled slightly, caught on a jagged comer of the beat up car frame. A minuscule read heart adorned the sealed note and you leaned forward to pull it out of its hiding spot.

Edward watched you carefully, only peeking at the road. He couldn’t see what you were looking at but he could tell that it had you captivated. He swallowed hard and his eyes shot forward as you sat back in your seat with the letter in hand. 

“Were they... from you?” Your voice was quiet as your stomach flipped and a small smile ghosted over your features. 

“Y-Y-Yes.” He stammered quietly, knowing there was no point in denying it from here. His gloved hands fiddled with the steering wheel as he kept his gaze forward.

“These have made the mornings very exciting for the passed few weeks.” You giggled as you thumbed the note between your fingers. 

"Y-You're not bothered by them?" His surprise wasn't masked. "O-Or that they're from me?"

"No, of course not." Your voice was low but it was steady.

Ed slowly came to a stop, pulling his car to the side of the road. Slowly turning to you, he cautiously took your hand in his own.

" I am so sorry for getting you involved in this. I understand if you want to turn me in. All I ask is that you give me enough time to get away." His voice was strained and quiet but his words were sure. He did not look you in the eyes but rather at the hand of yours he was still holding carefully.

"Just promise me your life was in danger." You said as you held his hand tighter.

"It was." And he looked you in the eye.

And that was the truth-about tonight at least.

"Then just take me home and stay with me tonight, don't leave me alone." You whispered.

"Okay. Well be safe at my place." He smiled as he uncertainly pressed a kiss to your cheek.

"You missed!" You proclaimed as you swiftly took him by the neck and kissed him softly.

[accountingfortaste]

Favorite Films of 2017

by Clay Keller

I’m finding it difficult to write something coherent about Olivier Assayas’ Personal Shopper, partially because the more I watch it, the more I’m convinced that I’m not meant to try; that its power lies in its complete lack of interest in being “coherent.” Just as a life, especially one thrown into grief-stricken chaos, only has the coherence that we arbitrarily apply to it, Personal Shopper is a series of strange and beguiling instances, full of un-explained oddities, horrors, and loose-ends. Instances that capture, better than any movie I’ve seen, that ephemeral feeling of existential entrapment; of being not stuck in place, but captive somehow. It’s a maddening, inexplicable, feeling, and that a film could dramatize it so well is deeply impressive.  

Speaking of captivity, Kristen Stewart delivers a performance in Personal Shopper that is so unvarnished, so unencumbered, that one has a difficult time conceiving that it was delivered at all, and not just simply lived. Each time I revisit this film I find it more difficult to turn away. It’s only a matter of time before Americans accept what the French celebrated a few years back: the fact that Kristen Stewart is fucking terrific. 

Anyway, I don’t know. Maybe everything I wrote above is rambling pablum. A bunch of nonsense my mind concocted by way of trying to intellectualize (or excuse) an instinctual love of a weirdo movie in which Kristen Stewart has a dramatic imessage conversation for twenty minutes and gets attacked by a Victorian ghost, which is just audacious and great. Is Personal Shopper a brilliant work by a genius and his genius muse? Is Personal Shopper bullshit? 

Or is it just me?

HONORABLE MENTION

(In Alphabetical Order)

Baby Driver (Edgar Wright)

The Big Sick (Michael Showalter)

Get Out (Jordan Peele)

A Ghost Story (David Lowery)

Lady Bird (Greta Gerwig)

Lady Macbeth (William Oldroyd)

Molly’s Game (Aaron Sorkin)

Thor: Ragnarok (Taika Waititi)

Three Billboards outside Ebbing, Missouri (Martin McDonagh)

Win It All (Joe Swanberg)

Anticipated 2017 Films Not Yet Seen: The Post (Update: I loved it!), Phantom Thread (Update: Favorite PTA since TWBB), The Florida Project, mother!, Good Time

MOST ANTICIPATED IN 2018

Annihilation (Alex Garland)

- Behind the camera: our premier sci-fi screenwriter. In front of the camera: Portman, Thompson, and Isaac. In the audience: me. 

The Happytime Murders (Brian Henson)

- The director of two of the best Muppet movies making his first feature in 20 years is definitely something to be excited about. 

E-Book (Olivier Assayas)

- Assayas has been so contemplative lately that we’ve forgotten that he’s also a total goddamn genre-mixing weirdo (see: Demonlover, Boarding Gate). Now he’s making a “full-blown comedy” with Juliette Binoche, one of his oldest collaborators, and I am here for it. 

Underwater (William Eubank)

- My favorite subgenre + my favorite Kristen Stewart = a movie I will probably love regardless of objective quality. 

You Were Never Really Here (Lynne Ramsey)

- If this trailer doesn’t ignite all of your senses, you are dead to the magic of cinema: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yMqsd7Umxy8

FAVORITE CLASSICS FIRST SEEN IN 2017

How on earth did I not see Do the Right Thing until I was nearly 30? It’s almost unfathomable how colorful, funny, and heartbreaking Spike Lee’s 3rd film is. It has myriad memorable scenes and characters. It creates a sense of place in a way that is almost unparalleled in film history. It’s entertaining as hell. It also has a pulsating heart of essential humanity and righteous anger that vibrates at such an honest frequency as to make you feel literally connected to the screen as the narrative unfolds. Do the Right Thing shook me, and is one of those “as good or better than its out-sized reputation” films, alongside The Godfather and Casablanca. 

FAVORITE TELEVISION

Me, at the beginning of 2017: “I’ve never seen Twin Peaks, mostly because I’m worried I’ll hate it, I’m not really a David Lynch fan.” Me, in August of 2017: “HAVE YOU NOTICED THAT THE ZIG-ZAG FLOORS IN THE BLACK LODGE ARE THE SAME AS THE ZIG-ZAG FLOORS IN THE LOBBY OF ERASERHEAD’S APARTMENT BUILDING?! AND THERE’S A PHOTO OF A MUSHROOM CLOUD ON THE WALL?! IS IT ALL CONNECTED?!” 

If I could retroactively make one of my 2017 resolutions be “do a total 180 on David Lynch and get super into Twin Peaks” then I would have accomplished something in this God-foresaken shit-ass year. I don’t know if it was age, or context, or what, but this year found my eyes suddenly opened to the genius of well-known genius David Lynch. I went from avoiding Twin Peaks for years to devouring and loving both of the original seasons. From “Mulholland Drive is weird and boring” to “Mulholland Drive is weird and a stone-cold modern masterpiece.” My former podcast co-host Darren Franich maintains that one needs to learn how to watch David Lynch, by watching David Lynch, and I couldn’t agree more. Watch just one of the elliptical missives that Lynch has released into our miasma and you will be left befuddled and possibly angry. Watch five and you’ll unlock the mysteries of the universe. 

Hyperbole? Perhaps. Then again, did you see episode 8 of Twin Peaks: The Return? 

It would have been so easy for Lynch and Frost to thrill Twin Peaks fans with The Return. After all, these are people (myself now included) who get goosebumps every time Kyle MacLachlan is so much as in the same room as a cup of coffee. Put a cherry pie on front of him and they (again, me now included) need to change their shorts. Instead, and, in retrospect, predictably, Lynch and Frost decided to use the eighteen hours Showtime gave them to thrill their audience in a different way: by creating an audio/visual experience the likes none of them had ever seen. Was it frustrating to wait nearly the entire season for our beloved Agent Cooper to return (if he does at all)? Yes. Were there storylines and characters that seemed meandering and pointless? Yes. Who the fuck is Freddie and why does he have a green glove hand? Yes. But none of that matters, because, for an entire summer, I rushed home on Sunday nights, needing to immerse myself in the wild juxtapositions of image and sound and performance that Lynch plucked out of the cosmos and so graciously delivered to us mere mortals, as soon as I possibly could.  

When Cooper finally did come back, well, Lynch nailed that moment too (goosebumps! shorts-changing!), of course, because he’s just as good at giving you what you want as he is at giving you what you need. And nostalgia goosebumps are lovely and all, but it’s a testament to the success of Twin Peaks: The Return that the nostalgia goosebumps are not what I’ll remember. What I’ll remember is when Cooper (?) asks what year it is, Laura Palmer (?) screams, and the lights go out in Twin Peaks (?), and my skin basically tore apart at the seams.  

[kittykatinabag]

Ah the anxiety is back today. How do I know?

I'm convinced that the way I'm planning to eat leftovers is somehow incorrect™ and will upset the universe which will turn on me and curse me with some sort of bad luck curse.

[screamtail]

Multiples of 10

10: If you could star in a biopic about any famous person ever, who would it be?

jenny lewis

20: If you could reboot or remake any movie, what would it be and who would you cast?

LESBIAN LORD OF THE RINGS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

rooney mara as frodo

tatiana maslany as sam

clea duvall as aragorn

kristen stewart as legolas

maria doyle kennedy as gimli

maggie smith as gandalf

keri russell as boromir

carly chaikin as faramir

sunita mani as eowyn

evelyne brochu as galadriel

cate blanchett as sauron

stephanie beatriz as arwen

yvette nicole brown as theoden

margo martindale as denethor

maisie williams and sophie turner as merry and pippin

ansel elgort as gollum

nathan fielder as saruman (a modern woman can present herself however she likes)

taylor swift as the witch-king of angmar

okay i know i’m missing a few important characters but this is still a good start

30: Have you ever bought an item of clothing because it reminded you of something a fictional character would wear?

oh absolutely lmao. but more just that I enjoy some characters’ styles so I like to adopt things here and there.

40: Are you better with numbers or words?

numbers probably. I’m really good at math (as long as it’s not mental math). I think I’m decent with words too though, at least in writing. I’m not as eloquent speaking out loud because I can ramble and I always forget what I’m saying in the middle of my sentences.

50: Who is your favorite late night talk show host?

I haven’t watched late night shows in years but growing up it was Conan

[guide-to-galaxy]

Yay! I decided I had watched enough to warrant a mid-month post! Or I just made myself watch some titles I hadn’t before. It’s really hard when there’s a million things to watch and you… start Teen Wolf again. No, this is not about me. That person rewatching Teen Wolf is definitely my cousin, BD. I, on the other hand, am starting some titles and forgetting about it (Kipo and the Wonderbeasts, Tales of Earthsea, there’s too many others to count).

Someone force me to go through my Continue Watching please 😭 Let’s get on with this!

Movies

Rewatches

#gallery-0-13 { margin: auto; } #gallery-0-13 .gallery-item { float: left; margin-top: 10px; text-align: center; width: 33%; } #gallery-0-13 img { border: 2px solid #cfcfcf; } #gallery-0-13 .gallery-caption { margin-left: 0; } /* see gallery_shortcode() in wp-includes/media.php */

The Matrix Reloaded

The Matrix Revolutions

Spider-Man

The Covenant

The Ring

Annabelle Comes Home

The Matrix Reloaded 5 💊👨‍💻

I thought that I wrote tons of things about this movie in my notes (even though I’ve watched the movie a dozen of times – that amount is actually way way more but uhhh Maths); but I only wrote: ‘we love it’.

So, thanks for that, past DB. Anyway, good thing I’ve watched this movie enough times to write a review haha.

I love seeing Zion every time. It’s vibrant, the people are vibrant. The speech Morpheus gives is *chef’s kiss. I love the dialogue in this trilogy, just beautiful. Like it may SEEM normal (dialogue at first) but No!!! It’s complicated!!

The Matrix Revolutions 5 💊👨‍💻

A perfect way of ending the trilogy. It’s excellent and just ties everything up so well?

Hugo Weaving is just everything in this. He’s so good at playing a villain. I just love how he speaks – because it’s basically just whispering but it demands your attention at the same time??

Also, I know that there’s a Matrix 4 happening!!! There’s not a lot of news about it, but I am very excited for whatever happens.

Spider-Man 5 🕷️

Listen, I grew up with these movies, so why shouldn’t I rate it 5 stars?

Also, like, this movie IS good!Look past all the critics who deem it really bad for whatever reason they have.

I need to watch the other two movies and then MAYBE I should finally get to watching Endgame…

The Covenant 5 👪

I’m not saying I’m great or anything but I was watching this and then I saw my sister watching it later so haha.

Caleb is Warren Peace (from Sky High). He’s so different here and also with short hair! Which is weird to see since I can only see him with long hair. And the love interest is Olivia Lennox (She’s the Man). And baby face Nate (Gossip Girl) and Sebastian Stan no wonder I love this movie so much.

It is a really good movie, though. Full of intrigue, supernatural elements and a good story.

The Ring 4 📺

Also need to watch the originals. Will prob do that soon. If you’ve watched both the originals and the remakes, which ones are scarier in your opinion?

This movie freaked me out as a kid enough that for like TWO WEEKS I would imagine the girl climbing through our tv. Did that stop me from watching tv? Nope.

Annabelle Comes Home 4 🏠

I’ve watched this before but my sister hasn’t (as we’re doing the conjuring universe watch), so it was time to watch it.

Also the one girl has the same name as me – Daniela – which isn’t a secret as I say my name on my about lol, I just prefer to use DB/everyone (including my parents) call me DB). Anyway, they kept putting emphasis on the DAN whereas we put emphasis on the D – but whatever, at least I’m ‘in’ the movie and they didn’t choose a Daniella. But then again my mom’s watching CSI: Las Vegas and the one character’s also DB so every now and then I look up because I think she’s calling me 😄

The Daniela in the movie kept making dumb decisions. I mean, honestly kid, you’re letting down the Daniela name for us all.

All in all, yes scary. Loved that it had McKenna Grace as I always like seeing her. But not as great as the second Annabelle, though. Still good. And a creepy room with like tons of haunted artifacts, no thank you.

Must-Watches

#gallery-0-14 { margin: auto; } #gallery-0-14 .gallery-item { float: left; margin-top: 10px; text-align: center; width: 33%; } #gallery-0-14 img { border: 2px solid #cfcfcf; } #gallery-0-14 .gallery-caption { margin-left: 0; } /* see gallery_shortcode() in wp-includes/media.php */

Charlie’s Angels

Charlie’s Angels: Full Throttle

What Dreams May Come

Charlie’s Angels (2000) 5 🕵️‍♀️

I really need to watch the new one. You can moan about Kristen Stewart all you want, I won’t listen.

It’s still good – like there’s probably some parts that aren’t great, and the Thin Man is still as creepy as I first saw him as a kid.

Also, Lucy Liu was paid only $1 million while Drew Barrymore ($9 million, though she was the producer and most likely received that money too. Cameron Diaz was paid $12 million!!

Charlie’s Angels: Full Throttle 4 🕵️‍♀️

I mean did we really need a sequel? Not really. But we got one, so oh well. I mean, the plot’s all over the place, but still fun!

What Dreams May Come True 5 💤

You can’t go wrong with  Robin Williams tbh. And this is a movie I didn’t even know he was in.

It’s so beautiful?? Like the music and the the scenery and the story, if you don’t mind a really dark storyline and events.

This is the soul mate au I search for hours on ao3 for.

The Rest

#gallery-0-15 { margin: auto; } #gallery-0-15 .gallery-item { float: left; margin-top: 10px; text-align: center; width: 50%; } #gallery-0-15 img { border: 2px solid #cfcfcf; } #gallery-0-15 .gallery-caption { margin-left: 0; } /* see gallery_shortcode() in wp-includes/media.php */

Bloodshot

Sinister Circle

Friday the 13th

Feminists: Where Thinking?

Bloodshot 3 🩸

My mom after I sort of explained the plot to her: “Oh like Robocop?” Which I haven’t watched yet, so I don’t know how that is.

I half watched most of it because I was battling with a post and the new block editor – I really wanna try to get to know it. And I had to go through html and everything – I’m really glad that I know basic html lemme tell you – it is VITAL that you learn at least some while you run a blog. 

Anyway, I just saw Vin Diesel and he becomes a superhero or something? or at least a super-powered person. I mean, I could’ve paid more attention to the plot, but there wasn’t a lot to interest me. So this falls into more the under-3-but-not-a-2 stars.

He punches a wall/pillar, I can’t remember… like I know it’s probably to ‘show’ his strength or whatever, but really?

Sinister Circle 3

It was OK. Like I liked it, the mom and the kid and a bit of the plot but,,, yeah that’s it.

It had some good jump scares, though.

Friday the 13th remake 2 🏕️

Maybe I should’ve started with the original, because this was… not at all good. But it had Jared Padalecki in it! And that’s basically why this is 2 stars and not 1.

A ton of scenes are shot in the dark and I know that’s half for danger and half because it’s set at night, but like?? How am I meant to see anything?

Feminists: What Where They Thinking? 3

It was good. It wasn’t so largely focused on intersectional feminism, more so the start of feminism, which is still good and all, but I would’ve liked some more diversity.

Series

The Unlisted

The Unlisted 4 🏫

It wasn’t the absolute best series I’ve ever watched, but it wasn’t half bad either!

Yes, the kids aren’t the greatest actors but they’re good. It gets a bit better story wise and sort of character wise too. But then again it’s OK to watch subpar TV!

Also I thought their accents sounded South African until I realized like no, lol, that’s just Australian. Usually I’m good with picking up on the differences.

So their eyes glow like electric blue and the one character doesn’t and like no one sees it? Just because he wears glasses doesn’t mean you can’t see it!

Also the gran just feeds everyone and we stan. I saw tons of samosas and now I want some 😭😭

Yes, yes, I know I ramble a whole bunch a lot. Maybe I wouldn’t have to talk to myself a ton if I had some comments. So, tell me what you’ve been watching lately!

What I Watched This Month (Mid-Month) August Yay! I decided I had watched enough to warrant a mid-month post! Or I just made myself watch some titles I hadn't before.

[ofconsequence]

It’s been a long while, Tumblr.

Been missing RPing a lot -- the good parts of it, I mean. I miss hearing new music and building characters and making aesthetics and icons and gifs and the writing and being excited about creative stuff. I miss researching or looking for pictures of locations and stuff too.

I’m in a good place for the most part right now. Like, I still have no friends, but it’s easier for me to be healthy when I’m not looking for validation from people I like who aren’t like... familial-y obligated-ish to like me? I don’t know if that makes sense. I know it’s my problem, me looking for validation, and it doesn’t mean other people are bad people or anything. I just haven’t figured out how to healthily keep friends yet and for now just being with my mom and actually getting along with my brother have been doing good things for my health.

Honestly, I originally logged on because I saw a picture of Lily James on my pinterest feed and Riley just said last night that Kristen Bell was “such a freakin’ cutie-pie” and she used to say “young Donna from Mamma Mia -- she cuuuute.” and I like how he says girls are hot are cute and it made me think of dumb little tumblr posts people make about their families. 

.. This is rambly and not full of sense because I haven’t eaten a proper meal since yesterday morning and my brain is NOT working today -- blanked out on so many things I was trying to remember already, haha. 

But anyways. 

Yeah. It’s just been nice how nice my brother’s been lately. Gives me hope that we’ll be friends as adults.  We watched Frozen yesterday to see if he still remembered all the words -- he did.

[thrashermaxey]

Ramblings: Updates on Andersen, McAvoy; Jokiharju Returns; Kase – January 10

  Frederik Andersen was back in net for the Leafs in practice on Wednesday, but don’t anticipate him to make the start on Thursday. It looks like his target for return will be Saturday night. At the least, those in weekly fantasy leagues will really only miss out on one start from him. Everyone else should be getting ready to activate him off the IR on Friday.

*

The Toronto Maple Leafs have new power play units:

  Different look on the power play units at #Leafs practice: PP1: Marleau, Matthews, Nylander, Johnsson and Gardiner. PK1: Hyman, Brown, Hainsey and Zaitsev PP1a: Kapanen, Tavares, Marner, Kadri and Rielly. PK1a: Gauthier, Lindholm, Marincin and Holl.

— Kristen Shilton (@kristen_shilton) January 9, 2019

  I’ve often railed against teams spreading their talent across two power play units and this is no exception. I get they want to try something new given the power play has gone cold, but it’s only really been a couple weeks that the power play has struggled. Maybe something small, say, replacing Nazem Kadri with William Nylander, rather than blowing the whole thing up would be the first plan of attack. We’ll see how long this actually lasts.  

*

Zach Aston-Reese has been put on the injured reserve. He has been on the fourth line a bit of late but had often found himself in Pittsburgh’s top-6 over his career.

*

Alec Martinez was skating in Kings practice on Wednesday. He hasn’t played in a month with an upper-body injury. When healthy and getting minutes, he can be a good peripheral guy. Whether he gets those minutes – he’s getting about two fewer minutes per game this year than last – will decide his fantasy relevance.  

*

Look for Charlie McAvoy to possibly be back this weekend for the Bruins.

*

Don’t forget to reserve your copy of the 2019 Dobber Hockey Midseason Fantasy Guide! Rest of season projections, tips, call-ups, and a whole bunch more to get you through the stretch run of your fantasy campaign. Check out the Dobber Shop today.

*

Matt Duchene didn’t make the trip to California with the Senators in anticipation of the birth of his first child. It appears he’ll miss the entire trip. All the best to the Duchene family with their new addition!

*

The Blackhawks welcomed Henri Jokiharju back to the lineup as he returned from the World Juniors. We’ll see if he can get the minutes, especially at even strength, that he was getting early in the season.

*

Rickard Rakell was back in the Ducks lineup for the first time in over a month. He was on the top line, naturally, with Ryan Getzlaf and Daniel Sprong.

*

Something interesting I saw on Tuesday night: down three goals with under five minutes left, the Flyers went to four forwards and one defenceman. It didn’t last long as when they had extended offensive zone control, Philly pulled their goalie for a 6v5. But you can see four forwards in the picture below, and Shayne Gostisbehere was the lone defenceman back on the left point. It’s one way to get added offensive threat late in the game when needing a goal without having to actually pull the goalie. They did score not too long after this. I wonder if more teams follow suit? It certainly seems like a good idea. 

*

I wanted to share a few hockey articles I’ve enjoyed recently (aside from the ones here at Dobber).

First, this article from Justin Bourne on the legacy of playing mini-sticks. I’m sure there are hundreds (thousands?) of you reading this right now who were instantly transported back to being in elementary school, maybe being at a friend’s house or on the road for a hockey tournament, who can remember playing hours upon hours of mini-sticks as kids. I remember my childhood home having a perfect open square space under the counter where the garbage can was, and that provided a perfect ‘net’ for my brother and I. I can also remember a road tournament when I was maybe 9 or 10 years old and a few of my teammates and I were going from floor to floor, hall to hall to get away from hotel staff so we could keep playing mini-sticks. I don’t think our parents were too happy about that. What are some of your favourite mini-sticks stories? Hit the comments.

Second, Part 1 and Part 2 from Shayna Goldman at Hockey Graphs about the actual take-home pay of NHL players, considering relevant taxes, escrow, and other variables. Another article that isn’t fantasy relevant but is good information to have when those barroom arguments about player salaries comes up.

Finally, about a week ago, Travis Yost at TSN discussed the depth scoring from the Washington Capitals. Namely, about how Evgeny Kuznetsov and Lars Eller can get the puck to teammates in dangerous shooting areas consistently. We’ve seen it often in the past: top-heavy teams can win a round or two in the playoffs but that’s about it. I’ve said Eller is one of the most important cogs on this team because if he can get a depth line going offensively, it gives the Caps three scoring lines, something not many teams can boast. There are maybe three or four other teams in the East who can boast the same. Lars Eller playing like he can means the difference between the Caps being a one-and-done team like the Penguins squads of 5-ish years ago, or the Caps making another Stanley Cup run (where Eller was so important last year). We shall see.

 *

Since the start of the 2016-17 season, Ondrej Kase has managed 1.95 points per 60 minutes at five-on-five. For reference, teammate Rickard Rakell is just above him at 1.99. League-wide in that span, Kase is tied with Matt Duchene for points/60, and is just behind names like Vladimir Tarasenko (1.98) and Sean Couturier (1.97). Also league-wide, among 268 forwards with at least 1700 minutes in that span, Kase is 15th in goals/60 minutes. The reason for his not being higher in points/60 is obviously, then, because of low assist rates. That’ll happen when you play on a low-scoring team and spend just 271 minutes out of over 1700 with either Rakell or Jakob Silfverberg, the team’s only two consistent scorers (apologies to Corey Perry). It’ll also happen when you have just 150 minutes of 5v4 ice time in those 144 games, or about a minute per game. When you don’t play with other goal scorers very often, and don’t get much power play time, you’re unlikely to rack up assists.

The question, then, is if everything breaks right for Kase, what is his upside?

We’re kind of seeing that already this year with 19 points in 25 games heading into Wednesday night’s action, but he has more goals than assists and just four power-play points. I used to get mad about Randy Carlyle not playing Kase on the same PP unit as Ryan Getzlaf, but maybe he has a point: since the start of the 2016 season, with Kase and Getzlaf on the ice for a 5v4 power play, the team is landing about 45.8 shots on goal per 60 minutes. Anaheim’s most-common unit this season (which doesn’t include Kase) is landing over 53 shots per 60 minutes. Being able to generate roughly 16 percent more shots on goal is very significant. I’m not here to debate power play structure but in the opportunities given, Kase hasn’t been a big factor on the power play. He could be better suited for the second unit.

Now, in saying all this, maybe a new coach figures out how to make it work in the not-too-distant future. All I’m saying for now is that I wouldn’t expect Kase to spend much time on the top power play unit, especially with Rickard Rakell back in the lineup, and definitely when Corey Perry eventually returns.

As for Kase’s upside, under the assumption he’s not seeing prime PP minutes anytime soon, I would look to Jason Zucker’s 2017-18 season. He finished the campaign with 33 goals and 31 assists, with just 16 of those points coming on the PP. He was playing a little bit more per game than Kase is right now by about a minute, but I think it’s an apt comparison. A very talented scoring winger (though Kase is good defensively as well) who can land a lot of shots on goal, leading to 25, 30 goals or more.  

*

Just as a small aside, while going through Kase’s stats for the season, I noticed something: Vladimir Tarasenko is top-10 in the league in shot attempts/60 minutes at five-on-five. His shooting percentage? An even five percent. His lowest mark in any season was 7.7% in his rookie 2013 campaign (the lockout season), and he hasn’t been below 10.4 percent since. Were you to double his shooting percentage at 5v5 this year to 10 percent, which would still be the second-lowest of his career, he’d be on pace for 35 goals in an 82-game season. According to our Dobber tools, Tarasenko already has 93 shots on goal within 30 feet of the net. Last year, that number was 148. So he’s on pace for about 40 more shots on goal from within 30 feet of the net and his shooting percentage has cratered. I don’t know what to say about the Blues anymore, but I find it hard to believe that Tarasenko is just falling off now at this age. I seem to say it often, but buy a second-half rebound from Tarasenko. He should be cheap enough to acquire in trades now.  

from All About Sports https://dobberhockey.com/hockey-rambling/ramblings-updates-on-andersen-mcavoy-jokiharju-returns-kase-january-10/

[kittykatinabag]

さあ、帰ろうか。