#not to say shotgun weddings didn't happen

[bethanydelleman]

im curious about what you mean when you call "compromise" a likely ahistorical concept in that post about caroline bingley. have you posted about this before? it's one of those tropes that's almost like furniture in regency setting fic and literature - id never really considered that it wasn't accurate (at least broadly)

I wrote a whole article about it!

The biggest problem with the trope is that authors rarely consider the power dynamics of the compromise, which is roughly equivalent to a shotgun marriage today. One of the most sensible compromises I've seen is in Bridgerton, surprisingly, because a male relative of about equal status used an actual gun to try and make the compromiser marry his sister. If the female doesn't have a powerful or willing male relation, who holds the shotgun?

Another big problem which comes up a lot in fan fiction is lowering the bar of physical contact. In Bridgerton, Daphne and Simon are fully making out, in a lot of Chinese dramas they lock drunk/drugged up, opposite sex people in a room for an entire night and then let servants "discover" them in the morning. That's very compromising! Yet, you'll read some historical fiction/a lot of fan fiction of a woman doing something as innocent as tripping into a man's arms or being alone in a room with them fully clothed and people scream, "Compromise!" It's just silly. Jane Austen has men and women accidentally alone frequently and no one ever gets married from it.

"Compromise" is a modern term for a trope, I've yet to see it in a single contemporary novel from the 1800s, and while I am certain that shotgun marriages happened throughout history, I'm also pretty sure they didn't happen as often or as innocently as a lot of historical fiction suggests.

[kitscutie]

public eye (drew starkey x fem!reader)

pairing: drew starkey x reader

warnings: none, all cute shiz and some sexy moments. ;) shotgunning smoke, make out.

summary: all the times the public thought the two of you were dating, and the one time they knew.

a/n: sorry I've been on such a long break, life got a bit busy recently but i'm hoping to get back into writing - especially for drew! also sorry if the use of arse scares anyone - im british x

requests open!

word count: 1.8k

You and Drew has always been close. The cast were aware, the fans were aware. Ever since season one of Outer Banks came out, and both of your statuses grew, people began to dig. Your relationship friendship dated all the way back to your teenage years, doing multiple high school theatre shows together, and going on to attend the same University.

This also meant that there were a lot of photos and videos of the two of you being stupid kids, and while you had never explicitly said you were dating, even denying it to this day, there were early on suspicions.

A main one being the hundreds of photos together at family events, arms wrapped around each other, in some his jacket thrown over your shoulders as weddings went on into the night.

Though, the more incriminating stuff came much more recently, as now people knew who you were and so what was and wasn't posted was no longer in your control.

→ Sleeping Angels

The first video to cause rumours was posted onto Chase's story. It was short, only fifteen seconds or so, meaning no one was really concerned about what it might cause.

It was clearly from the set of OBX as the trailer surrounding you was littered with both cast and crew members, all shuffling around while you and drew were the complete contrast.

The pair of you were lying (quite comfortably) on a leather l-shaped sofa in the corner of the room. You could hear what you assumed to be Chase and Rudy giggling as they approached, laughing at how tightly Drew held you to him.

You were wrapped closely into his chest, arms lying softly on his wait while on of his held the back of your head, the other tucked under your t-shirt (which was actually your characters wardrobe and not your own) sitting on your back.

They couldn't see your face, but judging by Drew's closed eyes they could assume you were asleep.

Ever so gently the boys began to take gummy worms from their pockets. Each placing one in both of Drew's ears, and finally one was wedged into his mouth which woke him up.

At first, he was confused, looking down at you but upon seeing you still asleep his eyes looked up, squinting to avoid the lights. Unable to hide their humour at the situation anymore Chase and Rudy burst into laughter, Drew joining but much quieter due to his sleepy state as he threw the gummy worms back at the pair.

The removal of his hand on your back is what brought you back to the non-sleeping world. Hearing a mumbled 'fuck off' from Drew as he smiled at the two boys.

"What's happening?" You mumbled, utterly confused, hair sticking up in every direction and Drew quickly attempted to smooth it down maintaining your dignity as you were filmed.

"Nothing. Ignore these idiots ba-." The camera quickly shut off, leaving the viewers intrigued. What had Drew been about to say? Was it an accident? It was all unclear.

Of course with obsessed fans it didn't take long for rumours to fly, the main one being that the words coming out of his mouth were to be 'baby'. They were right. Thought you wouldn't tell them that, not yet at least.

→ Poguelandia

The next clip to blow up and cause hysteria was the two of you at the Outer Banks season three event 'Poguelandia'. You had arrived together and explored together, alongside Austin, your arm linked through the two boys'.

You talked to fans, played minigames and drank. Drank a lot. Which you blamed for your obliviousness when acting a bit too close to Drew for someone who wasn't dating him. To be fair, he also could've avoided it and yet neither of you did.

It happened as the cast and close friends stood atop the exclusive stage, all singing and dancing together as bands played - especially when 'Left hand free' came on.

You mostly behaved for the first twenty minutes, dancing with Madelyn, Madison and Carlacia but soon you wanted to spend some time with Drew, tending to get clingy when tipsy.

You began your walk over as the video begun, Madelyn attempting to grab your arm but it was a futile attempt as now, with him in your sights, you were determined.

The girls looked concerned before Austin- who was stood with Drew- leaned over and whispered something to them all, waving off their concern as they continued to dance and the camera now panned to you and the much taller boy.

You were talking, pressed against the edge of the silver fence which kept you from falling as the crowd kept growing around you.

As you got bumped by an unknown person Drew wrapped his arm around your waist, offering you a sip of his drink which you gladly took but soon regretted as you realised it was beer.

He chuckled with a smirk already knowing you didn't like it. Then he said something, but as the camera was miles away the viewers began to assume, and being reasonable, it did look awfully similar to 'sorry, sweetheart' before you received a gentle kiss to your forehead.

Soon after you joking turned away in annoyance, facing the stage and beginning to sway, your front pressed against the fence, back against Drew's stomach. He wrapped his hand around your waist, beginning to sway with you and you could tell the Filmer subtly freaked out as the camera jolted for a few seconds before it zoomed in further.

It showed Austin wide eyed as he searched the crowd for anyone watching. Not seeing anyone he shrugged taking a sip from his plastic cup before once again dancing with a smile.

Unfortunately, he had been wrong and once again your and Drew's relationship was being speculated.

→ Italy

The final clip of you and Drew which went viral without real confirmation of anything more than a close friendship was while he was filming in Italy.

After being spotted out and about alone for months, suddenly you appeared by his side wearing a pretty sundress, once again arm linked through his.

He wore a cap and you both wear sunglasses, looking like typical celebrities avoiding being spotted, though now it was known he had been here for months it was near impossible.

You were stood calmly in a corner attempting to navigate the way to a restaurant you were going to try when a small group of girls approached you both.

They explained they were big fans of Outer Banks and both of your characters in said show, asking very politely for a photograph in their adorable Italian accents.

They began screen recording in order to be able to capture the whole interaction, as fans often did and it was decided you would take the photo as you were in the middle, the girls on one side, drew on the other.

The viewers watched as you took the phone, hand briefly passing the camera showing a thick silver band ring, in it was a delicately carved cursive 'D'.

As soon as the girls watched the video back and saw it they posted the video to Tik Tok, it garnering as much attention as you imagined it would when showing something so potentially interesting.

What they didn't expect, however, was the further observations. The most major being the necklace that had been in almost every photo of Drews for the past few years, the charm which hung from the end now looked weirdly similar to your necklace, and the viewers couldn't help but wonder if it was a matching one of his own, with your initial carved instead of his.

It was.

→ The Conformation.

The final and real proof to all the fans who suspected you and Drew may be together was a video of the two of you at a cast night out in South Carolina at a club.

The two of you were stood outside of said club, clearly trying to cool down as both of you faces were red, Drew's shirt unbuttoned at the top, his chest rosy must like his cheeks.

He was leant against the wall of the club, legs wide as you stood between them, hands placed on his hips ever so slightly holding his shirt between your fingers.

Your dress which was black and almost fully covered in diamonds shimmered under the moonlight and you could see mouth something along the lines of 'you look beautiful' followed by you leaning forward, burying your smiling face into his neck.

His hand, which wasn't holding a lit cigarette came up to hold the back of your head, throwing his own back against the bricks in a laugh, clearly finding your bashfulness cute.

Soon enough the conversation turned from casual to flirty, body language changing in a way so blatant, you could tell from the other side of the screen.

Your hands moved from his waist to around his neck, hands linked behind his head as his spare hand held your waist, thumb soothing over the fabric covered skin every once in a while.

Realising his cigarette had been left unattended for a while, Drew brought it up to his lips, inhaling deeply. A wordless conversation ensued between the two of you as he brought you closer, mouths inches from each other as he exhaled into your mouth.

The smirk was evident on his lips as you blew the smoke from yours in turn, quickly pulling you in once again - this time your mouths connecting in a speedy rhythm.

You struggled to keep up due to his height, stretching onto your tip toes even in the platform boots you had put on for this very reason. He realised this, laughing, eyes still closed and lips still next to yours as he decided to lean down further to meet you instead.

As the kiss grew more intense, tongues now making appearance and putting on a show for the whole street, his hands reached down (having long since threw the cigarette to the ground) holding your arse between his palms.

Sadly, your moment was put to an end as a relieved looking JD ran out of the clubs door, seeing the two of you.

He patted you on the back, a blush covering his cheeks - from the heat or the intrusion it was unclear - and said something to the two of you before leaving and giving you a moment to gather yourselves.

You both stood up fixing your postures and straightening each others clothes before you shared one final peck, soon after heading inside, hands entangled.

Soon after, the video was posted onto every single social media platform with the caption, Y/N L/N AND DREW STARKEY MAKE IT OFFICAL DURING STEAMY KISS OUTSIDE SOUTH CAROLINA CLUB.

If only they knew you had been dating for years and this was most definitely not the first 'steamy kiss' the two of you had shared.

[babydollslibrary]

PARIS — NICO HISCHIER

published: March 19th, 2023

summary: in which y/n is so in love with Nico, that she doesn’t care about any of the gossip her friends tell her about her exes.

specific lyrics: “your ex-friend's sister met someone at a club and he kissed her. turns out it was that guy you hooked up with ages ago; some wannabe z-lister. and all the outfits were terrible. 2003 unbearable. did you see the photos? no, i didn't, but thanks, though.” and “i’m so in love that i might stop breathing.” and “privacy sign on the door, and on my page, and on the whole world. romance is not dead if you keep it just yours.” and “i wanna brainwash you, into loving me forever. i wanna transport you, to somewhere the culture's clever. confess my truth, in swooping, sloping, cursive letters.”

GIF by mattymartin

“did you hear that John got engaged?”

i peek up from my spot on the floor, glancing over to Ella who sits in the armchair across the room. Tara and Naomi are sat together on the couch, wide eyes and excited smiles.

“no.” i shake my head, my lips flattening in a straight line as i continue flipping through the magazine in my hands.

“yeah, he got engaged last week. but the kicker?” Naomi speaks this time, pausing for dramatic effect. “Ella heard from Carrie, who heard from the fiancée’s sister, that the girl is two months pregnant. it’s a shotgun wedding.”

“and she’s forty-one compared to his twenty-eight!” Tara pipes up. i glance up again, offering a furrowed brow and an uninterested nod. why were they telling me these things?

“cool. i mean, we’re adults, age doesn’t really matter anymore.” i shrug, and now it’s their turn to look at me like i’m crazy. our exes are usually our favorite topic for gossip, but that was before i met Nico eight months ago. now it’s typically been gossip about their exes. “besides, maybe they are getting married because she’s pregnant, but they could end up being really in love.”

“but- this is juicy?” Naomi says, her face scrunched in confusion. Ella and Tara nod along with her, clearly confused by my disinterest. i shrug once more, my focus falling back down to the magazine that rests in my lap now.

“John just isn’t part of my life anymore. i don’t really care what happens with him. i wish him the best in his marriage and fatherhood, though.”

“the best?” Ella balks, jaw hung open in surprise. “the man who cheated on you with three other women? you wish him the best?”

“i’m over it. did it hurt at the time? yeah. but, i’m happy now. if he hadn’t cheated on me, i wouldn’t’ve found my way to Nico, so it worked out in my favor.” i confess my feelings, and the girls all share a look, raising their brows in suspicion.

“that’s actually really mature of you, y/n/n. i’m proud of you.” Tara tells me, the other two nodding in agreement.

“what can i say? Nico’s been good for me.” i laugh, and they all giggle before returning to their own magazines.

**

“does it ever bother you that we’re not public?” Nico’s voice breaks me out of my trance. my hands, which were previously rubbing cleanser on my cheeks in circles, freeze and i look at his reflection in the bathroom mirror. he stands in the doorway, frowning down at his phone, leaning against the frame.

“no, why?” i ask. “does it bother you?”

“well, no. it was my idea.” he sighs, slipping his phone on the counter and making his way over to me, entangling his arms around my waist as i continue washing my face. “but, i don’t know. i just saw Shara’s post with Darya and i wondered if maybe it upsets you. i know girls like to be posted and admired, and i feel bad that i don’t do that.”

i finish washing the cleanser off my face, patting dry with a towel, before i twist around in his arms. placing my hands on his bare chest, i give him a soft smile.

“Neeks, i don’t need to be posted in order to feel admired. you make me feel that way every day just from your simple actions. i mean, just yesterday, you went for a run and came back with a bouquet of flowers. last week, you surprised me with a movie night and homemade pizza, when you could’ve very well spent that night sleeping early considering you were leaving the next day for a quick roadie.”

“but-” i press a finger against his lips, signaling for him to be quiet.

“i don’t need to be posted because i like our privacy. besides, the important people know. our friends, our family, they’re the only people we care about knowing, the entire world doesn’t have to know in order for our relationship to be real. if anything, i think it’s kept the romance alive because we’re living in the moment. we’re not taking our phones out to get pictures of our special moments; it’s just us enjoying our time together. i love you, and i know you love me. i don’t need us to be public in order to feel loved by you, because you make sure i’m aware of it every day.”

“ich liebe dich von ganzem Herzen.” he slots his lips between mine, soft and sweet, tasting like his mint toothpaste. we part, and i smile up at him.

“i only caught that first part, but i love you too. so much.” i step out of his grasp to walk back into his bedroom, glancing behind me to see him following me. slipping into bed, he copies me, turning his bedside light off and slinging an arm around my waist, pulling me into him so that we press against each other. my eyes fall closed, and i’m on the verge of sleep when i hear him mumble.

“ich möchte dich eines Tages heiraten.”

**

i’m spread across the couch at Naomi’s house this time, Ella sitting with my feet in her lap, Tara in one armchair, and Naomi in another.

Ella paints my toenails as Naomi and Tara gossip back and forth and i lay with my eyes closed, just listening.

“y/n.” i pry open my eyes to look over at Tara, humming inquisitively. “did you hear?”

“hear what?” i ask.

“your ex-friend, Gianna? her sister, Izzy, met someone at a club and he kissed her.” she tells me. my brows form a ‘v’ as i nod in understanding.

“okay?”

“turns out it was that guy you hooked up with ages ago; some wannabe z-lister.” Naomi chimes in. “remember him?”

“umm, vaguely, i think. Jake something or other. right?” i peek down at Ella, who stopped doing my toes in order to listen more intently.

“mhm!” Naomi hums before huffing out a harsh laugh. “and all the outfits were terrible.”

“like, 2003 unbearable.” Tara laughs. “did you see the photos?”

“no, i didn't, but thanks, though.” i tell her, shaking my head.

“do you wanna see them?” Naomi asks, tapping on her phone a couple times before i offering it to me.

“no, thanks.” i scrunch up my nose, shrugging.

“oh. okay…”

“i do!” Ella exclaims, swapping the nail polish in her hand for Naomi’s phone. “oh god!”

“it’s horrible! right?” Tara laughs, but i just frown, sitting up on the couch. “he’s wearing a camo thermal shirt under a polo! like dude!”

“guys, that’s mean.” i scold.

“it’s not mean, it’s the truth. if you saw the pictures, you would understand.” Ella giggles, offering me the phone once more. i push it away, shaking my head.

“i don’t care about what happens between Jake or Izzy.” i tell them. Ella shrugs, handing the phone back to Naomi and going back to painting my nails.

“you seriously don’t care?” Tara asks and i shake my head.

“not really. i’m at a good point in my life, Nico makes me really happy. i don’t care what my exes or almost exes are up to.” i admit. “i don’t mind all the other gossiping we do, i love gossip, but i really don’t care for hearing about my exes. it doesn’t affect me in any way, so why do i need to know about it? if they’re happy, then good for them.”

“who are you and what have you done with y/n?” Ella jokes, making us all giggle.

“i really love Nico. he makes me happy, which in turn, makes me content with what happened in the past. i don’t need to hear about the bad karma that’s hitting my exes, because i just don’t care about them anymore.” a soft smile spreads across my face at the thought of my boyfriend.

“i love Nico for you. this relationship is so healthy and i can tell how good he is for you.” Naomi tells me, her voice gentle and happy, a grin on her lips.

**

i stare down at the piece of card stock in my hands, tracing my cursive with my eyes.

‘kick ass tonight, captain!

p.s. i wanna love you forever

lovingly yours, y/n’

smiling in content, i tuck the note into one of Nico’s skates in his duffle bag for him to find later. a tradition i’ve come to look forward to, it started about two months into our relationship, when i slipped a note into the tupperware holding his pregame snack. when he got home after their win that night, he told me he looked at it during both intermissions. that was the night we said ‘i love you’ for the first time. so now before every home game, i write him a note and stick it somewhere in his things, in order for him to find it before the game, to give him a boost of confidence.

“darling, have you seen my keys?” Nico’s voice carries in from the living room, and i swipe his keys off the counter before padding to the entryway of the living room to find him digging in between the couch cushions.

“right here, love.” i smile, watching his head snap up and his sight lock on the car keys dangling from my fingers. he lets out a sigh of relief, making his way over to me.

“what would i do without you?” the question is rhetorical, but i can’t help but jokingly answer.

“walk.” i shrug. chuckling, he nabs the keys out of my hand whilst simultaneously planting a gentle kiss to my forehead.

“will you be here when i get back?” he asks, raising a hand to gingerly cup my jaw. i nuzzle deeper into his touch, nodding.

“of course.” i tell him before joking again- “i don’t have ESPN+, so i have to use yours on your tv to watch the game.”

he chuckles again, leaning down to press a quick but sweet kiss to my lips before bidding me goodbye. i wish him a good luck, watching as he leaves for his game.

**

“where’d it go?” i wonder aloud, scouring the bathroom countertop for my chapstick. Nico always puts it back after he borrows it, knowing it’s part of my nightly routine, but he must’ve forgotten today.

leaving the bathroom, i go back to his bedroom, scanning the top of his dresser for the lip product but coming up empty handed. i let out a deep sigh, moving on to his nightstand. not spotting it on the top, i open the drawer. but my brows furrow when i get the drawer ajar, only to find it empty other than a stack of cardstock. pulling one out, i flip it over in my hands, my eyes softening when i read the words swooped across the paper.

i pull out the stack, shuffling through them. my eyes prick with tears at the realization. my notes. i never knew what he did with them after the games, but i guess i assumed he just threw them away. but i was wrong, because they’re all here. all accounted for, dating back to the very first one. kept safe in his bedside drawer. tears slide down my cheeks, my heart pounding in my chest at the sweet gesture.

i place them all back in the drawer, swiping at my face to dry it, and giving up on my chapstick.

laid in bed, a book is gripped in my hands as i await Nico’s return after his big win. i perk up at the sound of the front door opening and shutting, placing my bookmark in and closing my book as Nico opens the bedroom door.

“hi, superstar!” i cheer, dropping my book onto the nightstand. a bashful grin spreads across his face as he drops his bag on the floor by the end of the bed. i shuffle on the bed, sitting up on my knees, facing the edge of the mattress. “two goals and an assist, and first star of the night. i’m so proud of you!”

“thank you, love.” he steps in front of me, wrapping his arms around my waist, pulling me flush against him, chest to chest. “did you see what i did after them?”

heat rises to my face as i think back to what he did after both goals. the gesture that he told me long ago meant he was dedicating those goals to me; a quick tap to his lips.

“i did. thank you, baby.” wrapping my arms around his neck, i crane my own, settling a gentle kiss onto his lips. parting, he lays his forehead on mine.

“i want to love you forever.” he tells me, making me giggle.

“using my own words on me?” i question, switching to bury my head in his neck. his hand rubs up and down my back as we hug in silence for a moment.

“i think that may have been my favorite note so far.” he admits, whispering in my ear.

“yeah?” i pull back to look at his big brown eyes, my favorite color for the past eight months. he hums an agreement.

“i’m so in love with you. sometimes, it feels like i might stop breathing.”

“you are the best thing that’s ever happened in my life.” i confess. “i love you. so much.”

“is it too early to ask you to marry me?” he questions. a joke, i assume, and i let out an airy laugh.

“maybe a little bit.” i tell him. “but how about we compromise?”

“and just how do we compromise?” he asks.

“how would you feel about me moving in with you?” a wide grins spread across his face at my words, happily nodding.

“i would love that.”

-

[maaikeatthefullmoon]

Once upon a time, there was a Good Omens fanfiction reader, who swore they didn't like AUs.

They read all the discussions about the 'classics', the 'must reads' and shrugged.

"But it's not canon", they muttered to themself. "They're not human. How on Earth can anyone write these stories about them when they're not actually bloody human? It’s not right."

And then, dear reader, they were persuaded to read just one AU. They were still an angel and a demon, just in a slightly different universe. And then...then they tried a human AU. And then...then they were hooked. Obsessed, one might say.

That reader, dear reader, was me. Of course. Obviously. Well, duh. And I would like to share the obsession in the form of some recommendations.

I have the wonderful @shadesofecclescakes to thank for MANY of these absolute beauties, she is absolutely the QUEEN of recommendations (and medicinal gifs).

So, now, in no particular order, some Highly Recommended AUs:

Or Be Nice by charlottemadison Rated E - A is a bookseller, C is a drummer, they are BOTH petty bitches. They're newly neighbours. C has a CAT and I'm there for it, he also has migraines and I hard relate. It's bitchy and the pranks were DIVINE. It was also deliciously spicy. The loveliness is that the author really captured the flawed nature of humans but also how it can be overcome. Same author as What We Make of It (what was Shotgun Wedding - an absolute GO AU CLASSIC and one of the best things I've ever read)

Not a Mounted Dildo but a Fuck Machine by NaroMoreau & summerofspock Rated E - So very, very E. This one was just filthy. So wonderfully filthy. The authors would like to tell you there was no plot to their porn, but there really was. A meets a girl online, because A is straight. He really is. Honest. But then, oops, lockdown happens. But, it's a good thing, really. For his best homeboy C is there, to help this poor virgin 'learn the ropes' for when lockdown is over and he goes on his first date...with the girl he's so very much into...coz, no homo, yo...;)

The Whole Damned World Seemed Upside Down by WyvernQuill Rated M - An AU in the way that it's still angel/demon but after Crowley makes a wish for things to be 'different', the universe obliges...and he's dumped into a reality which is very, very different to what he knew. He learns some truths and there's a whole lot of drama. Beautifully written with a wonderful plot and great drama. Excellently described and would make for great TV. (Oh, and Death in the new reality is really squeamish - it's brilliant.)

Telling Tall Tales by Siobhans_World Rated E - A sweet pretend relationship fic, where A pretends to be Maggie's boyfriend to help her pass as straight for her family. But he then meets her cousin, C, who he then inevitably (ineffably?) falls for. Miscommunication, angst, fluff, gay panic, it's got everything.

Flawless by @mrghostrat & @chernozemm Rated E - I've decided only to include one fic by each author and boyyy was it hard for ghostrat! But Flawless was, well, flawless. For such a relatively short story, it kept us guessing until the end. The characters were all beautifully written - the flaws (ha.) were DEEP and CRACKED but so fucking perfectly sculpted and presented. It was incredibly real and believable. Extremely maturely written and satisfying. AND THE ART!!!

How To Pull An Angel: A Bunnings DIY Guide by NascentSurrender Rated M - When I first saw the title, I thought it was going to be a silly, irreverent, comedy romp. But it was actually a funny, well written story that will stick in my mind always. Firstly, C watches Bluey - which is now CANON for me. Secondly, having lived in Aus as a child, I've got a soft spot for the country anyway, and I've barely ever seen it come up, so this was lovely. There were some wonderfully humorous bits, but also tender and beautiful moments that I adored.

Montreal Confidential by Maggie_Honeybite Rated E - I learned about Montreal (and Canada & their baked goods), classical music and mafia stuff in this fic. A is a widower. C plays the cello. His cello's name is Bentley. This is one of the only age-gap, mild D/s fics I've actually gotten into. There's fluff AND drama. CW for non-con (not A/C)

Under the Summer Stars by @pannotbread Rated E - an amazing astrophysics/astroecology/astrobiology fic that has pining, slow burn and Only One Telescope (yes, really, and it's everything you'd imagine). It's got beautifully written (erotic) imagery and So Much Science that's been written accessibly but still with amazing detail. It's poetry. It's hot. It's gorgeous. CW for internalised homophobia and self hatred. *Not completed yet*

Oddity by @tsyvia48 Rated E - A museum fic! About David Bowie! A is in charge of collections, C is an actor hired by (highly incompetent) Gabriel to guest curate a new Bowie exhibit. Miscommunication ensues for delicious tension. There's bitchiness, there's a bit of light angst, there's a lotta love. *Not Completed Yet* Poetry Carved In Flesh by @fellandcrow Rated E - I'm obsessed by tattoos. Hence, I am obsessed by this story. I'm planning a(n enormous) GO tattoo once GO3 is out, and this fic has actually helped me with my ideas. London-based A stalks lovingly follows Edinburgh-based tattoo artist C online. They build up a rapport. Well, C likes A. A is SMITTEN with C. C encourages A to get tattoos. Which he does. C designs a tattoo especially for A, the fic has currently left off at the point where C is in London and going to tattoo A. *Not Completed Yet*

There Is A Light & It Never Goes Out by @phoen1xr0se Rated M - A escapes from a disappointing, chaotic life to a remote island for five months to do research on puffins. There he meets lighthouse keeper C. Who also ran away, 20 odd years ago. There is a chaotic, found family on the island, but it is small, and it is lovely. This fic is written with love and passion and the imagery is so beautiful. The author has actually gone to do Actual. Physical. Research. on puffins. So how is THAT for dedication? Cannot wait until it resumes. *Not Completed Yet*

Ok, because I am Bad At Tumblr, I've not tagged the majority of authors, if you are on here - please let me know if you're here and I'll edit!

I should probably add in the following, I suppose. I'm writing an AU.

Free by, well, me. Imposterssyndrome (yes I know it's Imposter Syndrome, but that one already existed) Rated E - A runs a bookshop, C has an unfortunate past as a runaway ex-addict. They meet in an acute mental health ward after both having had a mental health crisis. Eventually A invites C to move in, and they navigate sharing a space, and their lives together. The story starts heavy, and is an emotional roller coaster, but there are moments of fluff and smut mixed in. There is a happy ending, I promise. It's a passion project, heavily researched and has a LOT of lived experience in it. I've gotten to know some amazing people through it who have messaged me and shared their experiences and I'm so glad I wrote it. *Not Completed Yet*

Last thing to say - once I finish Free, I will be teaming up with @shadesofecclescakes to write another human AU which is VERY much in her wheelhouse and I CANNOT FUCKING WAIT. I just know you're all going to LOVE it. The only thing that will make it even better is ART, so we're still on the hunt for someone.

**Last-last thing to say. I’ve missed off a few Biggies. There are some super popular AUs, mostly written around 2019. Most people will have read them. I’ve tried to focus on the perhaps lesser-known & WIP ones. Although I know many people don’t read WIPs, hopefully you’ll (book)mark them for future!**

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

Okay, I think the situation between Mama Spade and Lilia is absolutely hilarious! I can't but think of Silver and Deuce hearing rumors beforehand that Lilia is going to like to propose to her sometime at Family Day and then spying from out from bushes or trees if that is true and once it happens, it turns out that Lilia just was giving Mama Spade a Ring Pop because he is proposing they go out on a date not necessarily proposing marriage like the rumors claim. Maybe Lilia could also tease them a little or something because he thinks it's funny they assumed that he was actually going to ask Mama Spade to marry him, the silly boys😂

(Hope this request makes sense and I'm excited to see what you will come up with 🥺)

[Referencing this interaction! (Please be warned that it may be OOC; we hadn't formally met Deuce's mom at the time of writing that initial interaction.)]

Family means Nobody is Left Behind or Forgotten.

"I heard Deuce's mom and Silver's dad have something going on."

"I saw them flirting under the apple tree."

"He's going to propose to her before the day's over."

It was that flurry of rumors that the resulting worry that had led Deuce here: in the bushes, where the leaves and branches shielded him from sight. What he hadn't expected was to crash into another body, to be staring into a pair of aurora-colored irises in the dim space between the shrubs.

On instinct, Deuce opened his mouth--but Silver quickly clamped a hand over it, signaling with his other hand to keep quiet. The first year nodded obediently. A silent agreement was made; this was a mission they were in on together.

They peered out from their hiding spot and into the courtyard.

"You haven't had a chance to grab lunch?" Lilia Silver's dad was saying, brows raised in surprise. He addressed a woman with a navy bob, blonde stripes running through it.

She stuck out like a sore thumb among the other adult women in attendance. Instead of a dress or a pantsuit, she was in jeans and boots, a utility belt looped around her waist. Her jacket and cap were emblazoned with White Rabbit Deliveries' logo. A black spade earring shone on her ear, and her makeup was simple: nude lipstick and a faint golden shimmer on her lids.

"No, it's just been so busy today!" Dylla confessed. "I'm not used to sitting in so many meetings. It's usually me, the truck, and the open road. I got so caught up with everything else that eating must've slipped my mind."

"My, that's no good--no good at all. You need nourishment to keep your energy up," he said with the shake of his head. "I believe you're in luck though. I happen to have something to lift your spirits!"

"Really now? You managed to find time to prepare a surprise for me?" Dylla laughed. "Are you magic?"

"I can be, if you'd like." The reply was teasing, said in a tone that suggested something more.

"Haha, what is that supposed to mean?"

Deuce tensed.

Silver's dad was reaching into the pocket of his slacks. His hand, closing around an object he couldn't yet make out.

A ring? Deuce's stomach lurched. B-But...

His mom's promise hit him hard and fast.

“H-Hey now! I may have been a little swept off my feet by him, but I’m not marrying the guy!! No shotgun weddings here!! Wh-Who even marries a stranger they met in a day?!”

Mom... Did you lie to me back then to protect my feelings?

He began to shake all over, filled with an emotion that didn't quite have a label. No, it was all of his emotions at once flooding him. Silver frowned, laying a sympathetic hand on his underclassman's shoulder to soothe him.

"Dylla--May I call you that?"

"Yeah, of course. It'd be weird to keep having you call me 'Mrs. Spade' after all this time we spent together."

"Then I have an important question for you, Dylla. A question so important it may just change the trajectory of your life forever."

"What is it?" She leaned into him, lowering her voice to a whisper. Her eyes shone like pools of starlight. "You're being so mysterious."

He lifted his hand from his pocket, fingers still closed around whatever was in his palm. Deuce caught a glimpse of a sparkle between the index and thumb. His heart stood still.

"Dylla Spade. Will you do me the honor of--"

Deuce couldn't help himself. He tore away from Silver, launching out of the bushes with a roar, his arms flailing wildly.

"ST~OOOOOOP...!!"

The adults startled. Deuce stood before them, panting heavily, teary eyed, some leaves and a few sticks caught in his hair. He doubled over, clutching his knees.

"P-Please, Mr. Silver's Dad...!! If you want my mom's hand in marriage... YOU'LL HAVE TO GET THROUGH ME FIRST, SO PUT'M UP!!" Deuce raised both hands, clenched into threatening fists. In spite of his tears, he attempted to look fierce. "C'mon, let's GO!"

"D-Deuce?! Hold on, sweetie--what's this about?!" Dylla demanded.

An awkward cough sounded from behind him.

"I apologize for the intrusion, father... and Mrs. Spade," Silver muttered. "I tried to stop him, but..."

His father looked at Deuce, then at his own son.

Then he burst out into peals of laughter.

"Kufufufu! I see, I see. So this is what you were up to while we hit it off. Sneaking around and spying on the adults, are we? Naughty boys," he tutted. "What strange ideas you came up with and allowed yourselves to be taken in by."

Deuce blinked. "S-So... You're NOT proposing to my mom?"

"Proposing!!" Dylla smacked her son on the arm. "You're not serious, Deuce!!"

"B-But it really did look like he was going to..."

"Did I?" Silver's dad chuckled, opening his hand. Nestled square in his palm was a comedically large candy gemstone set on a plastic band. "I was merely going to offer this snack I had been saving to enjoy for myself later."

“… O-Oh.” Deuce turned as red as his dorm leader when he was livid. Embarrassment blazed in every one of his blood cells. “I hadn’t thought of that.”

Silver sighed, relieved. “Thank goodness…”

“S-So sorry about that!!” Deuce hurriedly bent into an apologetic bow. “Please forget you saw anything!!”

“It’s alright. No harm, no foul!” Silver’s dad glanced at Dylla, his mouth curling. “Though of course, I was also intending to invite the lady on a no-strings-attached lunch outing if she was interested~”

Dylla’s eyes widened. “You really are a charmer.”

He winked back. “Oh, I know. Should I take that as an emphatic yes then?”

“Yes, yes, a thousand times yes,” she said, roughly running a hand through his hair. It was left a mess, but he only laughed and popped the candy ring upon her naked finger.

Huh… I’ve never seen mom smile like that, even when she was with dad.

“… Hey, Silver-senpai?”

“Hmm?”

“Do you think your dad and my mom are…?” He couldn’t complete the sentence. Didn’t have the courage to. “… Never mind.”

I don’t need to know right now. All that matters is that they’re happy as they are.

[monkey-network]

Good Stuff: Bluey's The Sign

Bluey is still great and I don't need to go into why again. What's most important is that even in such short time of knowing this cartoon, you can see the growth of it all. Joe and the crew share how the world of the Heeler family gets to learn, adapt, and grow without rapidly warping the status quo. You go through and see how everyone is able to work through rough and weird times with sincere maturity. Season 3's Finale is where this all comes to a head and it's as beautiful as I expected, MORESO.

Brandi got to be happy would've been enough for me

The Sign deals with the idea of hard ideas. Those hard ideas that aren't inherently about change, but issues that when faced with initially, it feels like a bad ending. A bad ending which can't be easily fixed and you don't know where to go from there, and it hurts. It hurts when hard ideas swoop in, ruins your mood, festers your mind, and leaves you aimless. Bluey shows that it happens, this is the rare time where a ton of crap hits the fan in one day and it's not something Chili or Bandit or any adult can fix right away. I've never experienced this, but I felt the pain Bluey, Bingo, Frisky, and Chili went through where they're bargaining, burying, and avoiding confronting a potential reality they didn't want. This is where the real hero of the special comes in...

Haven't said before, but Calypso is a masterful teacher

The parable of the farmer works as an incredible seedling thought for Bluey when she reveals her moving. It's not a story I ever heard, but known the message all too well. The message of not just accepting bad things that happen to you, but know that it'll never be the end of the world because of them. Don't think of it as deep, but a natural motif to grow with. This is where a debacle regarding the episode churns with me. It can seem like a cop-out that every character gets what they wanted by the end, as I said before the cartoon can be more idealistic than what our real life allows. Then again, the true beauty of Bluey I believe has always been if it's possible, the family will find a way and do it responsibly.

If happiness can be achieved, they'll know how to get it

Beyond all this, the special is great. They waste no minute here in art and storytelling, and as said before, it's like Smash Bros Ultimate where everything is here. There are great callbacks to episodes you probably wouldn't have thought about, on top of getting to see the whole Heeler family on Chili and Bandit's sides like that blew my mind. Plus I love seeing weddings, dude, like I wish I was there with them. The feels are tsunami-ous like it's unfair to say this is the all-time best episode of the show, but darn if it wouldn't be earned.

When else will I see the epicness of riding shotgun?

But to conclude, it's been said that after this the Ludo crew will take a indefinite hiatus from Bluey the series, especially when they have a new project underway. And honestly? I'm more than satisfied. The show could've ended here and I would've been somewhat at peace with them giving us this beautiful episode. I of course didn't get into this series since its beginning, but I came around the right time to enjoy it myself, to see others recognize its greatness, and to finally make it here. It's great to know this was only another chapter in the book, and I'll see to be around when it gets to come back. As for The Sign? What else is there to say?

It was Beautiful. Cheers to the crew for everything.

[rue-dixon]

Bro-in-law Dandan propaganda

Dandan playing both sides for his sister and Chilchuck.

Chilwife venting about Chilchuck to her brother. "He just never listens! He's so stubborn I'm tired of him!" while Dandan's just nodding and agreeing like "mhm yeah he just doesn't understand what you're doing through when he's gone at all."

Turn around now to Chilchuck, venting to his brother in law aka his closest childhood friend about the same argument. "She just doesn't even try understand how hard it is for me too." And Dandan is once again nodding his head agreeing, "of course not, she doesn't understand just how hard those jobs actually are."

Uncle Dandan, but the girls call him Uncle Dan/Danny. Who's also closest with Puckpatti. Meijack's a daddy's girl, Flertom a mamas girls, and Puckpatti's an uncles girl.

Chilwife bugging Dandan about not being married yet. And tires to get Chilchuck to agree with her and talk to him about it too. But Chilchuck is just like "let the kid do what he wants, he'll find someone eventually."

When he first saw his sister and Meijack after she just gave birth (him being a child) he said Meijack looked like a "wrinkly potato".

Dandan became a dungeon adventurer because of Chilchuck, who tired really really hard to talk him out of it. But Dandan said he didn't plan on going very deep and wanted to stick with treasure hunters instead of hardcore explorers so Chilchuck laid off finally.

"Chilchuck's like the older brother I never had!"

"I'd say Dandan is the little brother I never had, but I have two of them and they're both little shits just like him."

Dandan would always ask how his sisters and nieces were doing when him and Chilchuck would be working at the guild together. But always obviously had more interest in Puckpatti.

"How's my sister?

"She's fine"

"... and Puck?"

"She's fine too, as well as my OTHER girls."

"Right right.. I was just gonna ask about them next!"

Chilchuck and Dandan worked together to form the guild. Dandan taking care of things when Chilchuck was away or on very long jobs.

Chilchuck and Dandan poked at each other a lot as children. But became good friends as adults. Especially when Dandan was old enough to start drinking, Chilchuck was happy to have a new dedicated drinking buddy. They even stayed close after his wife left him, "she left me, not him." Little does Chilchuck know, she actually told her brother she was leaving and why she left. But he never told Chilchuck because she asked him not to.

Dandan making fun of his sister's situation, especially when he was younger. Even if he actually didn't care about them having shotgun wedding, he just thought it was funny.

"This wouldn't have happened if you just kept your legs closed."

"Only I get to call my sister a whore because it's funny. Anyone else who tries dies."

Uncle Dandan telling the girls crazy stories about their parents when they were younger. Stories that the two of them never wanted their kids to know.

Dandan: what's that?

Chilchuck: huh? Oh those are the brothels for adventurers.

Dandan: oh... you never used it did you?

Chilchuck: what? No! Why would you think I'd cheat on my wife?!

Dandan: just making sure...

Since Chilchuck wants to hide his family from work. He has to tell Dandan not to tell anyone that they're in laws. That they're just friends and that's it. And he'd prefer if he didn't bring up his sister or nieces in conversations. Dandan thought he was weird and got a little suspicious. But Chilchuck explained his reasoning and Dandan agreed, it didn't affect him much anyways.

Dandan: so, what are you and my sister fighting about now?

Chilchuck: what? Where did you get that idea from??

Dandan: you've been sleeping in the union quarters for three days straight. So what's she mad at you for this time?

Chilchuck: ...

He's a built in babysitter even if he kinda hates it. But he loves his nieces so it's ok.

When they were estranged he fully believed they'd get back together and wasn't worried about them getting an official divorce at all. And just waved it off every time he was asked about it.

"You kidding? They couldn't keep their hands off each other when we were kids. Practically inseparable. I'm sure they'll talk, realize how much they miss each other, have makeup sex and then go on like none of this ever happened."

Anyways why'd they make him so cute in the anime tf

[athenasdaydreams]

okay i should be studying for my bio final but i couldnt stop thinking of jj maybank asking kook!reader's parents for permission to marry you (still on s2 of outerbanks idk what happened after that....)

jj, at 23 years old, thinks its so archaic to ask your parents for permission to marry you. hes been thinking about it for months now. he would much rather pick you up and go over to a courthouse and get it done with. not a flashy type of guy. but, growing up rich, you had mentioned so many times about a dream wedding and who was he to deny his girl's wishes. youd mentioned it so many times, even going as far as sending him your wedding pinterest board after being inspired by sarah and john b's shotgun wedding (or rather in an effort to make sure jj didn't expect you guys to have a shotgun wedding).

sarah cameron wanted to be as much of a pogue as possible, while you were reluctant to give up your kook lifestyle of dior lipgloss and chanel handbags. that was exactly why after taking up a second job at the wreck, a loan from the bank, a third job cleaning some kook's boat, and another loan from the guy at the fishing store (he didnt know it yet but jj was sure he'd pay him back), jj stood outside your family's mansion with a gold band tucked in his back pocket, and some pictures of some houses he was looking at, ready on his phone. he felt like he'd been standing out there for hours. 'now or never, maybank,' he mumbled as he wiped his hands on his old faded blue jeans which had been paired with pope's white button up, knocking on the door.

the woman who opened up the door looked exactly like you, just about 40 years older. 'evening mrs l/n, i'm jj maybank, your granddaughter's boyfriend.'

after giving him a scrutinising once over, she said 'she's not here,' and attempted to close the door. jj made sure to tell her that he wanted to talk to your parents about something important, and she somewhat reluctantly let him in.

your mother was sitting on the couch, reading the latest edition of vogue (something he could picture you doing a few years in the future) while your father had presumably just gotten back from work, enjoying some expensive looking drink while talking to his wife about his day.

'mr and mrs l/n?'

both of them whipped their heads around and looked towards jj.

'jonathan?'

he was regretting ever telling you his full name, more so regretting letting you introduce him to your parents like that, during that one horrible dinner that ended with you and your mom crying and your dad and jj almost killing each other. as time passed, they stopped hating him so much, but some resentment remained.

'uh, jj is fine. listen, i gotta talk to you guys about something'

'you didn't get her pregnant did you?!' your father stood up, trying to intimidate him. what for, he didn't know.

'NO no i didn't! i promise!!' he said as he stood in front of them, reaching into his back pocket. 'I came here to ask for your permission to marry your daughter.' your mom looked like she was about to have a stroke and your dad was about to protest.

'listen, before you guys say anything, i want you to know that your daughter was the best thing to ever happen to me. i love her more than anything in the world and i would sacrifice everything, including my own life for her. i know you guys think i don't have the means to support her or give her the life she deserves and i agree. i'll never be able to give her the life she truly deserves but that doesn't mean i'll try. i've taken up 2 more jobs to buy her this ring and save up for a house- its really nice by the way, i have some photos-and i would take up all the jobs in the world just to give her the life she wants. so please, please let me marry your daughter,' jj said in what felt like one breath.

your father was shocked and your emotional mother was on the verge of tears.

"jj?"

at the sound of your voice, jj turned around to be met with your confused face. "i didn't know we had plans today... and why're you dressed like that?"

he turned to your father, who gave him the slightest nod, signalling him to approach you.

"i had a whole thing planned to do this, with dinner and candles 'n shit, but i feel like if i dont do this now im going to explode."

"jj, what do you mean? you're scaring me." you looked at him with concern, the poor boy looked like he was about to pass out.

he got onto one knee and held out the ring he had bought for you.

"from the moment I first saw you, I knew you were something special. you were unlike anyone else I’ve ever met. And now, standing here in front of you…I’m pretty damn sure that i wouldn't wanna spend my life with anyone but you."

your vision started blurring from the tears in your eyes.

"will you marry me?"

[aziraphales-library]

Hi, just wondering if you have any fics were Crowley and Aziraphale text frequently? AU's are fine 😊

Thank you!!

We have some texting fics here and you may enjoy fics on our #social media tag, which will include fics with online messaging. Here are more fics with texting...

Short Message Service by squiddz (E)

He got halfway down the page before the phone flashed with a notification again. Another message from Crowley. It took all of three seconds for Aziraphale to fold and pick up the phone. Crowley: so Crowley: what are you wearing Aziraphale: What kind of question is that? You know exactly what I'm wearing. --- In which Crowley gives Aziraphale a mobile phone, and then tries his level best to sext with him.

just friends (he's too important) by Narwhalhavingsomuchfun (T)

Biology student Anthony Crowley can't afford to fail his gen ed history class at Tadfield University. But luckily he's found a someone willing to tutor him in history. 3 guesses as to who that may be *** Crowley POV Strangers to friends to best friends to lovers texting fic

Play The Game by ffonippop (M)

Aziraphale was a university student on his last grueling year of pursuing a joint-honors Bachelors degree in Biology and Theology. His favorite day of the week was Sunday, because on Sunday, he could forget about the lab and leave behind the library to gather with his friends and play a competitive game of trivia— Quiz Bowl. He liked Quiz Bowl because it was a brain game, it was engaging, and it promoted teamwork. But most of all, he liked Quiz Bowl because he was the best at it. Until Crowley, the arrogant bastard with a swagger in his saunter, started showing up.

Dim the Lights and Sing You Songs by Polaris (E)

A few months prior to leaving the Dowling household, Crowley had downloaded Grindr for the sole purpose of catfishing randy morons. He was not expecting a paragraph that began with: ‘hello. I hope you don’t think this is too forward, but I couldn’t help but notice you have the most lovely nipples.’ Crowley keeps trying to meet his Grindr fuckbuddy. Aziraphale keeps showing up at all his meeting spots. This is terrible.

Readings From the Books of Ashtoreth by Quefish (E)

Vicar Aziraphale Bookman has a comfortable life. He lives in and serves the small village community of Tadfield. He enjoys contributing to local businesses, taking walks, and of course reading. His 'guilty pleasure', which gives him no guilt and all pleasure, is a series of novels by one AJ Ashtoreth. But what happens when he reaches out with an innocent bit of fanmail?

What We Make of It (Shotgun Wedding) by charlottemadison (E)

The important thing, Crowley tells himself -- the most important thing -- is Adam, his brilliant, creative, empathetic nephew. Being fourteen's hard enough; the kid didn't ask to deal with the weight of the world on top of it. And if taking care of Adam means Crowley has to tough it out at a job he can’t stand, so be it. And if Crowley's job means that Adam’s charming English teacher is NOT a romantic possibility, well, that's just how things go. But the occasional drink with Aziraphale proves hard to resist. They frequent the same pub, so who can object to them saying hello? Briefly sharing a table? Perhaps a little conversation? The painful knowledge that it can’t be anything more -- not without somebody getting fired or sued or both -- well, that can't be helped. Until Crowley stumbles onto a terribly reckless idea...

- Mod D

[bblhad-s]

18 January 2025...

I developed early... C-cups before I had my first period. But I was... Tubby, till I was a senior in highschool. How I didn't get pregnant that year is still a mystery to me. Unless I can just chalk up more miscarriages to that year. I'm almost embarrassingly easy to get off. Have almost always been that way.

Got married at 21, while I was in the Navy. We planned our children so that they wouldn't impact my ability to deploy. I had more miscarriages while we were trying than live births. Finally the doctors told me that getting pregnant again could kill me, and I got a partial historectomy.

After I got out of the Navy, Hubby and I use to go to bars and try to pick up a person for a threesome. It didn't always happen, but it was never dull. Sometimes a married guy would ask me back to his place, to keep him company. I'd say yeah and tell him I had to text my girlfriends so they wouldn't worry. I'd actually be texting hubby.

Fucking someone else's man is actually kinda fun. Call me a homewrecker all you want... He came onto me. It's not my guilt, my husband said I can fuck whoever I want to.

In 2013, I realized that I needed some psychological help, and after being on a wait list for what seemed like forever, I finally got to see a shrink.

Her shotgun approach to medication was brutal and effective. Most of my immediate problems went away, but with a side effect... I couldn't cum.

I still enjoyed sex with hubby. It was great. I got turned on, exited, wet... Just couldn't finish.

Got my meds fixed, and that's when Hubby decided he was a locked cocked, creampie eating cuckold.

How he told me... The kids were at his parents house for the weekend, and he's waiting on our bed in just a cock cage telling me his friend is on his way over to fuck me raw.

That became my bed, and he no longer had a say in what I wear or my sex life.

I started going to bars and bringing guys back home to fuck on my bed while Hubby was sleeping on the couch.

That first dude and I kept fucking for a few years. Then he got this girlfriend. He wanted us to meet. She looked 16 (mid 20s). Her name is Sara.

Long story short... She dumped him. Months later, she told me that I was her girlfriend now. Okay. My next birthday after that she got me a strapless strap-on. A fat piece goes in my pussy, and a long piece goes in whoever I'm going to fuck.

Over the last few years we've shared some bar trash. She's picked up two guys for us (one each), she's let be fuck her "boyfriend"(Tom) a lot. I've let her fuck Hubby a few times.

Hubby has been exploring himself, in the space I've provided. He used my vibrators and dildos to (orgasm, cum, squirt?) in his cage.

He's tried Sara's boyfriend and likes sex with guys.

My son's girlfriend kept sneaking into my house, the last time she almost got shot for it. We had a chat... So now apparently I'm her guardian. She's over the age of consent, my son isn't... They met in their math class. So she really did need help. She lives with Sara now, and still goes to the same school. I call her Chippy.

Met a guy in December 2024 that took me on a real date, and then treated me like a married fuck doll, We'll call him Sam. What Sam didn't tell me is that he's married. We all know that now. We'll call his wife Ssam.

Hubby doesn't want me to talk to Sam anymore, but... He doesn't have a say in my sex life anymore.

My birthday was last week. I'm 48 now. I didn't get the sex I wanted (because of the weather). So I made do.

I made Hubby be a Sissy bitch for the night. Called her Wifey. Asked if anyone had any good names for her.

Our wedding anniversary was this week. We had a lovely evening together. Dinner, a walk around places. He even got road head on the way home. He tried to be a forceful fuck... Oh no baby... That's not you. We can make love.

What I'm into... Cuckolding, Cuckqueaning, worshipping me, long term male chastity, short term female chastity, pegging, I'm starting to get into feminization.

[crownmemes]

Questioning Sentences, Vol. 27

(Questioning sentences from various sources to ask all kinds of muses. Adjust phrasing where needed)

"Still alone, are we?"

"What would possess you to do something so foolish?"

"Is he really your father? He's scary."

"How would someone like her know someone like you?"

"Are you trying to embarrass me?"

"I see you're not wearing handcuffs. I take it you were able to talk yourself out of trouble?"

"You just had to keep digging. You couldn't let it go, could you?"

"Did you know that 15% of married couples met at a wedding?"

"Are you growing a beard? I've always had rather a soft spot for bearded men."

"This man has eluded authorities for years. How did you find him so fast?"

"Why would I want to spy on him for you?"

"Don't get many visitors here, do you?"

"Do you really stay awake all night?"

"Did you even consider me when you thought of sacrificing yourself?"

"My decision disappoints you?"

"Are you nervous?"

"How did you know that?"

"Notice how I didn't need to lower myself to your level?"

"How about a cup of tea for the shock?"

"Do you know what I'd like? Really like?"

"Who told you where to find me?"

"Have you seen what a 12 gauge shotgun can do to a human body?"

"Have you not yet realised that there's no way out?"

"Is making me lose my concentration part of your strategy?"

"I take it you have no comment at this stage?"

"Did you confuse reacting with feeling?"

"Are you in danger of becoming a good man?"

"What if the ending isn't really the ending after all?"

"Did you ransack a greenhouse?"

"Why did you come over in the middle of the night?"

"Have you ever told your father what you just told me?"

"Is this what you wanted? Is it?"

"How are you really in the grand scheme of things?"

"What? Is there some rule against having fun?"

"Did you know you can buy cyanide on the dark web?"

"Why should I be worried about my conscience?"

"I haven't cried yet. Isn't that weird?"

"You're quite certain that we've never met before?"

"How can you stand being here?"

"Is this some kind of interrogation?"

"Have dinner with me? Just the two of us?"

"Why didn't you say anything about this before?"

"What am I supposed to call you?"

"You really are creepy, you know that?"

"How about we just go home and pretend this day never happened?"

"You really have no decency, do you?"

"Are you going to die soon?"

[lunarriviera]

another thrilling spirealm update

henlo my friends yes it's that time once again where i tell you what is happening on the bizarrely named drama "the spirealm," i am at episode 25 having shotgunned it all weekend and i have thoughts, opinions, and a gabillion screencaps of ruan nanzhu looking stricken, i finally had to stop taking them because he has the exact same face of devastated yearning in all of them and i was filling up my cloud drive. spoilers ahoy! [parts one and two are here if you even care]

as just mentioned, ruan nanzhu spends his time looking either 1) icily indifferent (when people who aren't qiushi are talking to him and/or dying in front of him, to his vast annoyance) or 2) torn asunder by pangs of desire (whenever he's staring at qiushi, who's babbling obliviously about science or clues or absolutely nothing of any importance whatsoever). here is a representative screencap but he has this look on his face pretty much continually, like he's just been hit by a car. a car of love.

it makes me put my head in my hands and scream quietly, i haven't seen a BL actor who understood the assignment this well since zhang xincheng or maybe even z1l. (who all clearly not only read the novel but underlined it, highlighted it, and stuck in colored post-it notes.) when not busy with adoration, he swans around being magnificent in a frockcoat like he's edward rochester, while lin qiushi trails behind him wearing a fit he got out of the goodwill box in his college dorm.

in spite of being besties with a literal fashion icon, at no point does it ever seem to occur to lingling "hm maybe i should dress a bit more formally for my imminent demise inside the doors"—no, instead he proudly wears his ratty sweatshirt with holes in it. which i sort of think might belong to huang junjie. idk maybe qiushi trusts it, and feels safe in it, hey look at that i made it sad.

massive power couple energy. also notice how their outfits are exact black-and-white negatives of each other, the harper's bazaar wedding photoshoot would have been so goddamn lit.

taking a brief moment for a shoutout to this guy. chen fei i don't even know what your fate will be but i already know you deserved better. not only do you patch everyone up with your veterinary knowledge, but i have seen your unrequited love. it did not go unobserved. you would have been a great partner, you're unimpressed by everything and drink your soy milk with chilling apathy. i'm real sorry the theatre gay didn't love you back. you're too similar i guess.

back to lin qiushi who has the worst case of main character energy since harry freaking potter. somehow the game is about him??? he has trauma??? none of this was in the novel and i'm just pretending it's not happening until it becomes impossible to ignore. in the meantime he continues to sympathize with door ghosts because he's just that nice of a guy. (EXCEPTION: nanzhu literally murdered two competitors bc they threatened his darling, and lin qiushi helped him cover it up. i was appalled for like 5 minutes then i shrugged. it's a cutthroat game, the doors change people. also it's like captain mal used to say: if someone tries to kill you, you kill 'em right back.) i have big Theories about what is fixing to happen but for now i will end by relating that lin qiushi has gone into a door alone, because he wants to butch up and be a better partner for ruan nanzhu. and that would be a great idea and super helpful except that nanzhu IMMEDIATELY WENT OUT OF HIS MIND WITH BLIND TERROR. outwardly of course he gives no signs of this (other than hiring someone to protect his fragile boyfriend, which, if lingling figures this out, ruan nanzhu will be sleeping on the sofa forever).

here he is pushing food around his plate miserably at lingling's funeral pre-solo-door party. everyone is having such a fun time.

and here he is standing in front of the door waiting like a dumb wounded animal. i have a feeling if lin qiushi doesn't emerge at 15 minutes on the dot, nanzhu will simply expire on the spot, like a wolf separated from its mate. maybe that's the end of the spirealm JUST KIDDING, we still haven't gotten to the part where they're on either side of a different door wailing at each other. i really need lin qiushi to stop being such a cheery equanimous little frat boy and START SUFFERING, can we get some mutual pining up in this bitch. (also i need his hair to change in the traditional BL post-wedding hairstyle alteration because i can't remember at this point if huang junjie even HAS a forehead under that vast curtain of bangs)

to sum up, we've had a) sexy handfeeding of lychees b) tender cat fur removal from face and c) stalking your pretty boyfriend aggressively against the wall so you can…offer him a packet of disinfectant. in the novel of course nanzhu bites him and yes xia zhiguang absolutely knows that's what he's supposed to be doing here, we love to see it.

oh and also d) "i'll protect you. i'll protect you forever."

SOON: THE THRILLING CONCLUSION. IT'LL BE SO FUCKING SAD. PS unrelated to any of this but the OST SLAPS and i sing along every time now, that opening song is an unskippable cut scene of a banger

PS gonna be sad when [redacted] dies, he's a real card. and that other person dies too. and that third person. shit it's about to get messy

[girlyteengirl18]

let me introduce my oc

drum roll pleaseeeee 🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁

give it up for soulanna kwandia pines!!!!

things about my oc

Soulanna was born in 1949, her birthday is on March 17, she is 63 years old, she has been married to stanley for 40ish years, her maiden name is Johnson , she is a cosmetologist she does hair and nails and other things, she has the most popular salon in the town of gravity Falls, in fact her salon was a gift for her and stanleys 30th anniversary. (she did in-fact cry, he knew she would love it and the fact that he was getting tired of the towns people coming to his(brothers) home so he got her something in town, she does work at the shack sometimes as Mrs. Mystery.

backstory timeeee

soulanna was born in detroit, MI but moved to Las Vegas when she was 13 with her mother corrina sonja johnson, an African-American woman from Chicago, Illinois and her father, kurtis Lamar johnson an African-American man from detroit,MI. her mother was a outstanding teacher and her father was a maifa man and a great gambler (hence why they moved to vegas) she also has three siblings one older sister one younger brother and another younger sister so she is the middle child. anyway her fav colors are green, and pastel pink, she is heavily inspired fashion wise by artist like Cleo soul, Britney Spears , the spice girls , donna summer and more. two songs to describe her would be 

meeting stanley time😛

Soulanna met Stanley when she was 23 at a party and after some dates they started dating, she never really knew his living situation but she knew of his past as he came undone one night in her apartment after a few months they had been dating (he says that’s when he knew she turned him “into a sap”) about a year into the relationship, she got pregnant, they became homeless and living in a car on the run all in 2 months. they decided to have a shotgun wedding before leaving Las Vegas, they chose to leave the baby (a girl) in front of a children’s home with a locket to remember them by.

Anyway- once the stuff with ford happened and they get settled she decided that she didn't want to just work in the shack with stan (which they had a argument about bc he’s protective of her and doesn’t know the town well enough to want her to work or go anywhere else) but he realizes that he was in the wrong (and she had to cuss his ass out), they did get their baby back (because they couldn’t bare the fact they had to give her up) when she was 7 years old her name is ma’niayh alora pines and in present time (2012) she is in her late 30s/early 40s? and lives in a town over

the end!!

a/n so this is my oc guys i need to make her a real backstory but that’s what i get so far but she is just me fr but bye my loves ❤️

[opinionsbyaf]

ABORTION; THE NEGATIVE EFFECTS! As I sit here on my lanai relaxing waiting for the storm to arrive I slip into my inner self and go into deep thought, thinking about life and where it has taken me, things I have done, things I wished I'd done, and things I wished I had done differently. What comes to mind strangely enough is the now hot-button political subject of abortion! What a strange subject to just pop into my head in deep thought! Or is it? As my mind dives deeper I see the direction to where it's going. I always say that I have absolutely no regrets in life, cause everything happens for a reason, and we are meant to learn lessons from everything that happens to us, good or bad! As I think about it, I do have a regret, actually two! I was party to two abortions, and my regret is not with the decision to get one, even though the final decision was the woman's, the decisions were sound both would have had difficult lives, to say the least! My regret is the stupidity that ultimately led up to having to make such a heart-wrenching decision, one that I think of every day!! And that's the God's truth!! This was many years ago, and it still bothers me to this day!! I would have had two more sons!!!

This brings me to the purpose of my writing today! As I sit here in thought it comes to me that if the abortion laws that are presently on the books today, even after the defeat of Row v Wade more than half of my immediate family would not existed!! First, my brother Jimmy most definitely would have been aborted! That means that my nephew Jimmy and his daughter Amber would not exist! His brother Philip and his newborn daughter would not exist, and neither would their sister Gina and her two kids! That would have been seven more people lost from one abortion! Let that sink in for a moment!! You may be saying how do you know that your brother would have been aborted? Simple, if you think about the era the 50s, my brother was born in 1950 to a woman out of wedlock!! Do you think an unmarried woman, in the fifties would have had the baby given the choice, especially a twenty-four-year-old? Then there's me six years later! My mother hooks up with this tall handsome sailor on leave oh no, she's pregnant again! Only this time she threatened him! Marry her or she'll tell her brothers! My uncles at the time were men you didn't want to mess with and my father knew this, so the shotgun wedding ensues. If the laws were on the books in 1956 there would have been no wedding, there would have been no abuse, there would have been no resentment that my father had for me, and there would have been no beatings on my mother or us! I would have been aborted! That means my son Vinny would not exist neither would my two grandchildren. Only God knows how the lives of the rest of my stepchildren would have differed. The lives of the other people's lives that I've touched throughout the years. The woman that I saved her life from a mugger/rapist when I was thirteen would most certainly have been killed! One life affects so many, it's like a waterfall effect! Also, if I were aborted, there would have been no shotgun wedding! That means there would not have been the birth of my sister three years later!! She would have been an innocent casualty in this whole abortion mess as well as her children and grandchildren! That means, my sister would never have been conceived, nor would her three children and so far her two grandchildren! So, from two abortions we have lost an additional sixteen people so far, what does that translate to in the future? How much would that number grow? Out of the people lost, what did humanity lose, what inventions, what great politicians, what great doctors, what great anything?? The possibilities are endless!!! In my opinion, abortion has its place! It should be a medical and moral decision ONLY! If the mother is in danger of her life if the baby will be stillborn, incest, or rape! Reasons such as these, NOT as a contraceptive!! In today's world with all the technology and contraceptives available unwanted pregnancy issues should be in the past!!! If abortion was legal in the fifties I would not be here to annoy you with my stories and opinions, wouldn't that have been great!!!??? Just food for thought people! Now take a look into YOUR family see who you think would have been aborted and how it would have affected your life or your family's life, and leave me a comment! Thanks for reading!!

Anthony Fioranelli

[fuckyeahgoodomensfanfic]

Good Omens Fic Rec: What We Make of It (Shotgun Wedding)

The important thing, Crowley tells himself -- the most important thing -- is Adam, his brilliant, creative, empathetic nephew. Being fourteen's hard enough; the kid didn't ask to deal with the weight of the world on top of it. And if taking care of Adam means Crowley has to tough it out at a job he can’t stand, so be it. And if Crowley's job means that Adam’s charming English teacher is NOT a romantic possibility, well, that's just how things go. But the occasional drink with Aziraphale proves hard to resist. They frequent the same pub, so who can object to them saying hello? Briefly sharing a table? Perhaps a little conversation? The painful knowledge that it can’t be anything more -- not without somebody getting fired or sued or both -- well, that can't be helped. Until Crowley stumbles onto a terribly reckless idea...

Length: 213,340 words

AO3 Rating: Explicit / Spice Level 🔥🔥

Best for: Safe in Public, Human AU, Slow Burn, Pick-Me-Up

Triggers: None

Read it here, fic by charlottemadison

*Minor Spoilers* I was so certain that I had already posted about this one! When I saw I hadn't, well, that just warranted a reread didn't it! This is a very famous fic, so I wouldn't be surprised if you've already read this. But if you haven't, or maybe didn't know if it was worth committing to the length, I'm here to tell you its very much worth your time.

Not only is this an excellent parent story, it's also a fake marriage story! Crowley is a single parent to his nephew Adam who strikes up a friendship with Adam's English teacher Mr. Fell. The problem? The company Crowley works for has a strict rule against dating anyone in the School Industry. You know, it's a tiny bit dramatic, but also one of the cleverer ideas to justify writing a forbidden relationship. Does this happen in real life? I don't know, but the way this is written I fully believe it could! Either way, there's a loophole they can exploit so they can be together, and all it takes is a quick, "I do."

Ugh their relationship is so wonderful here. It's very mature and healthy, the kind of relationships we want to read about because they are just so safe. They're able to talk through their issues and feelings and know they're always going to be supported. The love they have is so heartwarming it’s sickening. A lot is told through letters and text messages, which I personally loved. These are different characters from canon, they've both been changed by their human lives and surroundings, but this story just understands who they are deep down. They're not shallow characterizations.

Who this story really gets right is Adam. I full on believe this is the best handling of Adam in any fanfic I've read for Good Omens. A majority of the plot revolves around him being narcoleptic and epileptic. It has tons of amazing things to say about health care, being chronically ill, and being a parent to a child with health issues. But outside of that it understands who Adam is. Someone who is brilliant, creative, a leader, manipulative, arrogant. And how those traits can be both positive and negative for him. He wants to change the world, but has some learning to do along the way. I loved him, and I love how much Crowley loves being a dad. He even remarks on it, that people don't expect men to love being parents. It's nice to read a story of such a devoted guardian.

A really excellent story, it deserves it's popularity! I would say this is largely safe for public. There are a couple explicit scenes tucked in but they are skippable and a small section of a large story. Which by the way, will fly by! This story does NOT feel like 200K words. If you haven't gotten around to this one, I highly suggest you do!

Read it here, fic by charlottemadison

[bagel-muncher]

You're THE SOUKAN guy, tell me every single soukan HC you have IMMEDIANTLY (this is a threat btw :3)

I literally started typing this all up before I went to bed last night and I woke up to see this... get out of my head bestie. I am honored to be thought of as the Soukan guy lmao.

Some Soukan hc's because my brain is wrong

First off, I see Yu as bi and Kanji as pan.

Yu fell first. He has no clue when it happened, but at some point, Kanji just went from one of his best friends to someone he couldn't really do without. Still, Yu doesn't confess. If any of y'all have played the New Days fangame, I think of it like that dream Velvet Room thing with Kanji, where Yu worries that being in a relationship with Kanji would just make his life harder. He knows that if he does feel the same he'd just grin and bear it, but he doesn't want Kanji to have to deal with more rumors and assumptions about him than he already does.

Kanji is the one who confesses. It's the classic "one fell first, the other fell harder". Yu had time to come to terms with his feelings and let them be, Kanji realized he was head over heels for Yu and almost explodes trying not to let it slip every time they hung out. Surprise surprise, he doesn't last long and tries to make some big romantic gesture, only for it to fail miserably. Luckily, Yu found it adorable and they started dating.

Yu expresses his love through physical touch. He prefers being quiet to talking, so it's the easiest way to make sure the people he cares about know he loves them. He does his best not to be too obnoxious about it in public for Kanji's sake, but he's constantly holding his hand, leaning onto him, or otherwise invading his space. When they are alone though, he's super cuddly. Kanji can't do much of anything if it doesn't allow letting his boyfriend hold him while he does it.

Kanji is all about acts of service and gift-giving. Words are hard and he struggles to be as unabashedly affectionate as Yu. So instead, he makes use of his skills in sewing and cooking to constantly make him gifts or treat him to meals. Even if some part of him is still embarrassed about his hobbies, he feels a lot better about it since he's doing it for someone he loves who wholeheartedly supports him.

Comfortable silence is the name of the game with them. Yu prefers not to speak, Kanji never knows what to say without feeling like he'll make a fool of himself. Still, he always felt like he had to fill the void Yu made with his silence until Yu eventually was able to convince him he didn't have to.

THE cat dads of all time. Yu showed Kanji the neighborhood strays one day and now they have them all named and Kanji comes by to help feed them from time to time. Kanji mentions getting a cat or two when they eventually get their own place, and Yu teases him for already fantasizing about them living together. (He has already imagined a full wedding and everything his ass should NOT be talking)

Dojima had very mixed opinions on them dating at first. There was the whole thing about Yu dating a guy in the first place, which while making Dojima a bit confused at first, he got past pretty quickly. The bigger problem was that it was Kanji. Dojima knew he really wasn't a bad guy, but he was stubborn and had trouble being comfortable with a guy with his reputation dating his nephew. Nanako really likes Kanji though, and with how often Kanji shows up with Yu and helps out while he's there, Dojima does grow to accept it. There's still a level of "Dad who makes sure his daughter's bf knows he owns a shotgun" energy, but he lets them be as long as they're responsible.

On the other hand, Kanji's mother was over the moon when she learned they got together. Yu's a great guy, and she's overjoyed that not only has her son started to make some great friends, but he even managed to snag himself a boyfriend.

I think Nanako would absolutely love to learn they're dating. Even if she still thinks Kanji looks scary, he's very sweet to her and makes Yu happy, so she adores him. He's basically already her brother-in-law in her mind.

Yu and Nanako have a frankly ridiculous amount of plushies that Kanji made for them. Nanako is of course overjoyed by the gifts, but Yu is starting to run out of space on his shelf.

Since Dojima is usually out late, Yu invites Kanji over often to have dinner with him and Nanako. It's part date, part making the work easier on himself. It's the exact sort of domestic fluff one would expect, the three of them having a great time cooking and eating dinner before watching TV together (Yu using Kanji as a pillow the entire time, ofc) before Nanako eventually has to be put to bed. Yu constantly jokes about them living just like this when they grow up and if they decide to start a family, and Kanji's red even as he denies how much he'd like that. These nights usually end up with Kanji staying too late to be out and having to stay over or straight-up falling asleep on the couch. Yu always has to deal with a lecture from Dojima the next morning, but getting to cuddle Kanji all night makes it more than worth it.

Honestly, I could write waaaaay more but I feel this is enough for now and I probably should focus that energy on actually writing lol.