#not that i hoard my mail but a lot is important and needs to be stored

[pumpkinwastaken]

I want to ramble about my "Buying a new laptop so i can sit in the yard and play terraria?" journey so far. It's not going well lol, Laptops are so pricey!! Even refurbished i don't think the cost to performance ratio is worth both the investment for a machine that ill use when chilling in my yard and the fact that i do NOT LIKE having many things. Currently i think i might as well just swap borked parts and the battery on my old laptop and just use that one. Sure it's heavy and has no touchscreen but i got a drawing tablet and as long as i don't have to keep it wired to use it i can still use it plenty fine! Minimalism for me is only owning the essentials and things i REALLY want. And to purchase a new laptop i think it goes in conflict with my lifestyle at this moment.

[o0o0thorn0o0o]

Late, I know, but…! Only by two days, so I’ll still label/tag it:

Ichihime Week, Day 7: Mythical Lovers / Rainbow

I was planning on adding in magpies in the background this time, but I was getting lazy, and it’s already late, so maybe next time ^^;

(Also I was thinking of making a rainbow version, but it didn't come out as I would have liked? Idk. I still think it’s cute, though, so I put it under the cut)

Alrighty, listen: I really didn’t mean to wait this long to post. But, like, very shortly after Eid, my iPad’s storage filled up, like, to the point I couldn’t even access my mail (that’s how I found out, pfft). I was wondering why I’d ever need 256 GB 4 years ago… but still, it was $100 extra bucks. Sure, it was a grad gift, but 128 GB was expensive enough—still a lot of storage, too… Not enough, clearly!

Hoarding layers (and recoloring my own art, pfft) has really caught up to me… but also, it wouldn’t help too much if I didn’t either. After deleting what I could bear to part with, that took away around 5 GB, but merging layers in other works barely made a dent.

So I’ve spent these past few weeks wondering what to do, thinking about emailing my 2019 (imported from my 5s) and 2020 works to an email I also created 4 years ago for some reason I totally forgot about and never used so that I don’t end up taking any space in my actual one and then uploading them onto two (since I really don’t want my files corrupting) USBs via my laptop, trying to get those USBs from Target (but since I was adamant this time in getting 256 GB USBs—I don’t want to have to worry about storage for a longgggg time—there were none in stock), ordering them off of eBay instead since my dad insisted on their cheapness, waiting a week for them, then transferring them to that email and uploading them onto its Google drive if the files was too big…

But that was taking much too long and still left space on my iPad while I was doing it. I managed to complete the 2019 and 2020 pieces from my iPad, but it also only ended up being around 1 GB… So, like, I need to clear more years (breaks my heart, it does ;~; Sure, I still have access to them via that email and those USBs, but it’s not convenient anymore, and there are still pieces I plan on getting back to… ackkkkk).

Contemplating it some more and discussing it with a friend, much as I abhor subscription services, I finally decided to purchase a premium membership on Ibis for that 20 GB of cloud storage. I can afford the 30 bucks a year, and I like the app anyway—serves me good—and not having to watch an ad every 18 hours to access my go-to brushes would be nice, plus having access to the other stuff, but yeah: ✋🌈✨cloud storage✨🌈 🤚

Anyway, I’m pretty sure a good chunk of what’s taking up my space is actually the cache, as I’m already more than halfway through my drawings, and I’m not sure if I’ll reach that 75 GB of storage Ibis was apparently taking up with just my drawings. So I’ll probably need to download everything, then delete the app and redownload it ‘cause stupid IOS doesn’t let you easily clear it 🫠

Anyway, I really thought I’d be done by now, but am not—that said, I managed to clear out around 10 GB off of Ibis (not my iPad; I somehow managed to gain back 5?? Somewhere?? I’ve no clue; I don’t see it), which is wayyy more than enough to get one drawing done for IH week, so I paused the whole storage thing for now. I actually tried to get day one’s drawing done on the 6th, but I’m dealing with perspective that’s hurting my brain, so I decided to get day seven’s done instead, ‘cause I thought I’d be on time…

Me? On time? Man, who knew I was so funny… 😒

But yeah, day seven is done! I’ll definitely revisit that day one drawing in the future, but not anytime soon. As if I wasn’t backed up already, this whole storage mess has backlogged even further, and there are other dates coming up 😮‍💨 And, y’know, gotta finish the storage transfer, too… Ahhhhhhhhhh!

Anyway, on a more positive note, gradient maps are actually very neat to use—had a little too much fun, eheh. I won’t confess how much time I spent testing it out on this piece, but here be my favorite:

They’re so golden <3 ☺️

[submalevolentgrace]

i've been thinking a lot about gunpla lately, hell i am so gunplilled all i can think about is gunpla, but like it's good to have a hobby right? whenever i say that i just keep remembering "i think it's great you have a hobby" which is a line this guy says to his girlfriend about her getting involved in the women's lib movement aka 2nd wave feminism, it's from this like 60's british crime drama about a gay gangster, i think it might be based on a real guy and his autobiography? it's such a brutal belittling of her involvement that she sleeps with the female student he's having an affair with, and the main character is played by that guy, he's not the one that says the hobby line to his girlfriend btw that's a side character and the main character is gay as i said, he's played by that guy, you know, he's been in a bunch of stuff, he was the power hungry bad guy in shazam and also the power hoarding bad guy in john carpenter of mars, which i only know because i literally just watched it tonight with my girlfriend, because she got a new ereader recently right and it has access to all these public domain books for free, so she was reading princess of mars and i was like oh i have heard of that, did you know they made a bad movie from it, so we watched it and yeah it was pretty bad, bad acting bad cgi bad like structural editing, so my gf was then telling me all about how the movie butchered the book, which by the way she wasn't even super hot keen on, but she did point out that it has a cohesive theme about war and turning away from violence and how important it is that it's on mars, mars the god of war, theme of war etc, and the movie butchered it so bad and also it wasn't even called john carter of mars, just john carter, because the marketing team, apparently, decided nobody would see it if it had mars in the title because hollywood is just insanely dumb and it didn't matter because nobody saw it anyway, and apparently there were 2 sequels planned and got cancelled when it bombed and last year the director talked about those sequel plans, which i guess got it into search term lists or something because, and this is so fucked up about our modern culture and it makes my blood boil, if you lookup "john carter trailer" on youtube there's a fuckton of videos titled "john carter 2 teaser trailer" with the same thumbnail that are just, complete lies, there is no sequel or trailer, they just exist to literally bait your clicks and hopefully get ad revenue, because nothing matters anymore, you know i read a thing a while ago about someone struggling with centrelink's bullshit to get unemployment payments, and their job services people kept telling them they needed to be a productive member of society, but their last job had literally been doing mail merge setups for spam email for some shady startup that was almost certainly a scam, and they were just exhausted by like, the system punishing them for quitting that job when it was literally anti-productive, literally making society worse, and that's all those fake trailer videos are, that's all most of the internet is now, but we're still here, still struggling, so much struggling, i am always struggling,

did you know when i spoke to my gp like probably 7 years ago now about getting a referral for adhd assessment, she literally said to my face, this woman with a medical degree, "i don't know why you'd think you need that, you have no problem sitting still in the waiting room", and i was speechless, but i composed myself and begged her to write the referral anyway, and she did except it wasn't for adhd, it was for [redacted] that everyone told me i had but everyone was scared of even touching, and i knew any psych that saw that would rush right past even looking at adhd and nobody was helping with [redacted], so when i saw my copy of the referral cc'd in an email back to me i called her up and was like hey this isn't what i need, i need adhd referral, and she legit said "but dealing with [redacted] is much more important, it could cause you serious bodily damage and even cost you your life if we don't address it" which was the most real and honest thing a doctor had said, so ofc i was like yes fuck it might! that's what i've been saying! so are you finally going to start looking into treatment?? and she said "no, treatment is bad, you could become drug dependent" and i was like, limit my scripts then, do a monitored trial, come on. do something. there was this back and forth like, so you acknowledge it exists and need treatment? yes. and you acknowledge that without treatment it could harm or even kill me? yes. so what treatment is available? oh i can't give you treatment that's dangerous. and i just, couldn't even cope anymore. i stopped seeing that doctor at all, i didn't have a doctor to see. i called the psych i was referred to and they told me they wouldn't see me, taking on a patient with [redacted] would be too risky for their professional reputation. timelines are fuzzy to me, but i'm almost certain that in under a year from that going down i'd end up in hospital needing major surgery, except they didn't do the surgery i needed to repair the damage to my body, they overrode my right to consent and experimented on me instead doing a surgery they wanted to do and i still don't really know what their motivation were, beyond just speculating, ego and ableism, the lawyer told me, off the record, that they'd jist close ranks and use my past teenage trauma against me to defend their removal of my right to consent, as if that had anything to do with what they did….

anyway i'm really into gunpla lately, it's basically all i can think about. just ordered some new weapon packs. gonna have a four-armed assassin girl mech - yes 30 minute missions still counts as gunpla - with matching quad-wield pistols, i've gotten really into the idea of a four-armed gunslinger lately because of this game i've been playing, fun but runs like shit and crashes a lot, and it has a four armed pistol girl in it, and strangely enough there are aliens in john carter (of mars!) that are four armed too, but it's not because of that, it's because of star renegades, the green martians are just coincidence, but man, fuck those fake trailers for a nonexistant sequal of a bad movie, just a drain on society. did you know the guy that helps run the unemployed workers union had to do work for the dole at the ballarat cemetry and centrelink paid private investigators to drive by and make sure they were all doing their mandated unpaid work, is there a word for mandatory unpaid work under constant surveillence?, but he also still had job services appointments to go to which were scheduled during workhours and if he didn't attend he'd have his payments cancelled, but he wasn't allowed time off from his mandatory unpaid work to goto them or he'd be marked noncompliant with work for the dole and have his payments cancelled? homelessness is illegal. that's how you make a productive member of society. how much money do you think centrelink pays the private dicks that spy on the unemployed mandatory unpaid workers? more than unemployment benefits i'm guessing. i know i'm lucky not to be in that system anymore, to be in the disability system instead. lucky. out of the unemployment system because my disability cost me a hand. recently got told that i'm not on the ndis as an amputee, i'm on there for [redacted]. don't know how true that is. i don't even think i have [redacted], they never ran scans, they didn't do tests, it's supposed to be a diagnosis of exclusion, but they didn't bother to exclude anything else first. lucky. there's something deeply wrong with my body and i'll probably never find out what, because last time i tried, i ended up hospitalised under constant guard with no right to consent, no right to withdraw my consent for the experemental shit they did to me, the awful things they put me through to try and make their ego project work. totk got 2nd spot on a youtuber's goty list this week, that's nice. people are scared of [redacted], that's why i don't say it. can you believe people used to be scared of people with cancer, like it was contagious? i remember princess di hugging aids patients, barely. if i don't have a chaperone people in public pull their children away from me, as if my amputation is contagious. they don't even know about [redacted] and they're scared of me, unless i have a friend. i think my nub responds to barometric pressure changes kinda like arthritis, it hurts more when there are sudden shifts in weather. i don't actually know what it's like to have a hand crushed by a frigid hydraulic press, but my brain is assuring me that's what's been happening constantly for three days now. i've been thinking a lot about gunpla lately. i also got a rocket launcher for my beloved dilanza sol, and the kit also comes with a scale mobile worker, which i'm stoked about because ibo kits are hard to come by, and i really enjoyed ibo. it had some problems definitely worth dissecting, but also way more homoerotic tension and overt text than wfm did, even if all you want is yuri i still reckon kudellia and atra have more chemistry than suletta and miorine, fight me. i wonder if that'd get me death threats like my totk post did? also mikazuki is thematically linked forever in my head with-- no i don't want you consolenscences. the reason i refuse to post selfies is that my third worst nightmare is going in to he bakery or fish and chip shop one day and the respective old ladies that work there recognise my tattoos and go "submalevolentgrace???" and know all this

my top two worst nightmares btw are medical torture and child rape.

i've been thinking a lot about gunpla lately.

it's nice to have a hobby.

[bunnyamyrose]

sharing this from my blogger weblog:

advice for practicing minimalism /// reasonable minimalism and feeling empowered, not burdened

"“Why is this so hard” becomes “How can I make this easier?”" - Tonya Leigh.

1: you don't need to get rid of everything. minimalism is subjective. it is a philosophy, a principle, a practice. it is something that you practice over time. you can practice minimalism to whatever extent may be reasonable for you. you're the one who gets to decide what you resonate with as it relates to this subjective philosophy. I personally like both minimalism and maximalism. I like collecting things and decorating, and it needs to be very organized, -- things need places to be organized into, it helps to have things organized on the walls, with shelves/bookcases, toy hammocks, in drawers, on or in a desk/dresser/table, etc. also, as someone who deals with hoarding, it's important to me to be able to get rid of some things sometimes, which can feel empowering. minimalism should feel empowering, not like a burden. intend to feel empowered and practice minimalism in a way that is reasonable for you.

2: "little by little, bit by bit." you don't need to get rid of things all at once or all the time. it's a practice and a process. try to regularly de-clutter unnecessary junk so that it's not being hoarded and/or piling up. you don't have to feel like you need to go through the whole house and garage or whatever all at once or all in one day/week/month, etc. plan for long-term progress (that doesn't mean that you need to plan it all out, just intend to practice it long-term). minimalism isn't a one-size box that you need to rigidly fit your life into, plan for minimalism to fit into your life. you can take small steps and make some more progress over time. ask yourself how you can make things easier.

3: prevent. find ways to prevent unnecessary clutter. unsubscribe from spam (digital or snail mail, etc.), cancel shopping subscriptions that you don't need or want, really think about how much you want something before you buy it. re-use or re-purpose stuff. try one or a few things at once instead of a lot (renting less books from the library, buying less variations of things that you want to try until another time, etc.). save old paper or newspaper for the fireplace.

[aguineapigcouldntdothis]

ok this all started about 10 months ago when my 4 roommates and I moved in together. we got 3 keys from the post office for our shared mailbox. my roommate technically owned these keys yet she put them where everyone could use them so it was no issue. one day she stopped putting the keys in an accessible area where everyone could use them because someone was not putting them back. I cant confirm or deny this because I know I wasnt doing this. there is one roommate (now moved out) who would possibly do something like this. I dont agree with that if she did thats not super relevant to the story tho.

anyway many months get by of having to ask my roommate to borrow her keys every time I needed to get the mail. she had 3 keys, mind you, and wouldn't even put one out for all of us to use. the mail would pile up so much that there would be weeks and weeks worth of it shoved into our mailbox and packages sitting in the parcel lockers for just as long. she clearly wasn't even getting the mail herself on a regular basis. also it feels super demeaning to have to ask your roommate for the keys to your own mailbox.

I tried to stay calm and civil with her because even though I am not afraid to be confrontational I also don't like dealing with shit like this. what set me off was getting a notice for my blood test bill being almost late (paid it on time thank g-d) because the mail hadn't been brought in for weeks.

possibly important context is that towns in the southwest USA with decent amenities like doctors offices and whatnot are typically 45min-1hr apart by car. theres smaller villages in between and those usually don't have much more than a gas station and small store if even that. the closest blood testing office that all medical offices generally accept is about an hour away. if I didnt pay my bill in time I would likely no longer be allowed to get blood work done there and I may have to drive 2-3 hours instead of 1.

I ended up confronting her about this and I didn't yell but I sure as fuck wasn't calm and patient. I told her that either she needed to let me make copies of the mail keys or get the mail herself on a regular basis. there were 3 other people living there besides her and if she was gonna hoard the only 3 keys it was her responsibility to get the mail. she kept saying "its not my responsibility" and all that sort of bs.

anyway I decided to go to USPS on my own and asked if they made mail keys because afaik you only get 3. I figured that remained the same but I asked just in case something changed. eventually my roommate decided that we should both go to usps together so she could ask about the mail keys which I was silently pissed off abt bc I felt like she didn't trust me just to ask questions about keys. we still went though and she asked the questions when the very kind employee said they only provide 3 keys and she said "oh I didn't know that!"

I used to tell white lies a lot and its a habit I've done very well to grow out of. I said that that was completely new information even though it wasn't . I am not proud of this, yet I did it because if I said anything else I would have decked her. I didnt wanna bother the very nice employee. I had been to this post office days earlier and was told to my face that there were only 3 keys and they didn't make copies. she either forgot this over the course of a few days or was totally bullshitting this. whichever it was i wasn't happy.

anyway she eventually allowed me to take one of her keys and copy it. it took literally 15 minutes including the drive and now we have a few extra keys (a couple I keep on my keyring). there are plenty for everyone to have at least 2 and if we ever need more ill gladly make them. also I get the mail on a regular basis. im definitely not a saint however im sure as fuck not letting packages bake in the heat for weeks and weeks and everyone deserves regular access to their mail when they need it.

what rlly pisses me off in a way thats unrelated to this story is my roommate's superiority complex. she does act very nice on the outside and I dont believe that's fake I think she's really just outwardly very nice. which is amazing! (its still not the type of personality I vibe with and that's my problem, not hers. not her issue that get weirded out when people are too happy-go-lucky). what truly bothers me is her actions show she puts so little faith in the people around her and believes she is the only one who can do things right. although my other two roommates weren't perfect bc no one is (both moved out now) they were good, kind, smart, reasonable people who never deserved to be treated like they're lesser and I didnt deserve that either. we also didn't deserve dozens of envelopes in the mailbox at a time

am I pissed off that even though my roommate and I have mail keys im literally the only one who gets the mail? yeah kinda. I dont mind getting the mail its more about the fact that she could but never does.

also if u want more context pls ask bc there is a story behind all this. I dont like her very much shes perfectly nice I just can't stand her

[logicalbookthief]

Christmas Movies Ranked by How Anti-Capitalist They Are

It’s a Wonderful Life

Movies that make you want to pick a fight with the 1% and also weep with joy. Absolutely a classic and anti-capitalist at its very core. Will convince you we need to start oppressing landlords again.

“Just remember this, Mr. Potter, that this rabble you're talking about... they do most of the working and paying and living and dying in this community. Well, is it too much to have them work and pay and live and die in a couple of decent rooms and a bath? Anyway, my father didn't think so. People were human beings to him. But to you, a warped, frustrated old man, they're cattle.”

SAY THAT!!! George Bailey said fuck landlords, all my homies hate landlords, they have NO rights. Local man believes poor people are human, dedicates his life to helping them, and in his time of the need literally the whole town comes together to support him and his family. Class solidarity ftw!

“Remember no man is a failure who has friends.” Bitch I CRY EVERY GODDAMN TIME. 

10/10

Home Alone

Soundtrack goes hard, the wacky hijinks even harder. 

Loses points because the bandits had a prime opportunity to seize and redistribute some of the wealth from this ritzy Chicago neighborhood and instead they focus their energy on trying to kill an 8-year-old who outsmarts them at every turn.

2/10

Elf

A family favorite in our house. Touches on the overworking and mistreatment of employees through Greenway Press – Walter forced to choose between being with his family on Christmas Eve or losing his job, it’s implied Deb has a pet grooming business on the side to makes ends meet despite being a receptionist at a NY publishing company, etc.

Honestly most of the points come from Jonie’s underrated yet highly relatable storyline. She works in retail, exhausted and cynical towards the high-paced Christmas season which gives her little to no relief or reward, since she’s surviving on ramen noodles and using the employee showers because her water was cut off. Not expanded on enough to be considered a true Marxist piece but the effort is appreciated.

5/10

Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer

Although the meme is correct in that Rudolph’s red nose becomes desirable only once it proves to be useful, it does get points for exposing the harmful nature of forced conformity and those alienated by these capitalist ideals -- Rudolph, Hermie, the island of misfit toys -- are given a place to belong despite the perceived “flaws” that before made them undesirable.

Also the elves definitely have a free dental-plan now thanks to Hermie and are hopefully on their way to unionizing. Fucking superb you funky little misfit.

6/10

Klaus (2019)

Turns a member of the bourgeoisie into a man I’d trust to carry my mail. Respect for postal workers this movie contains was ahead of its time.

 No direct takedown of the establishment but a heartwarming message -- “A true selfless act always sparks another” bITCH I may be crying -- that emphasizes the importance of giving to others even when there is no selfish motivation to do so, which is inherently anti-capitalist.  

8/10

The Santa Clause

Scott Calvin starts as a toy executive who takes part in the commercialization of Christmas. He was probably a business major so automatically loses points.

The Santa dynasty itself seems to operate under the cutthroat rules of the business world where you must overthrow (or in this case, throw him off the roof) the former CEO in order to seize power. 

Elves have not unionized or seized the means of production by the end.

0/10

A Christmas Carol 

THE ORIGINAL. Charles Dickens was not even in the neighborhood of fucking around with this one. CREATED the anti-capitalist Christmas genre!!

Rich man treats his employees like shit and gets terrorized by three ghosts on Christmas Eve. Force him to redistribute his wealth by dragging him through a montage of his most epic fails -- oh, hey, remember when your fiancé left you? -- and make him listen as all his employees and relatives complain about his stingy ass. 

They end this slideshow by throwing this dude into his own grave. DIRECT ACTION. 

Like damn, the ghosts really said, “If you hoard your resources and ignore those in need when you could directly improve/save lives with no cost to yourself, you will die ALONE and you WILL pay for your crimes in hell.” Literally watching this movie is a catharsis for anyone who is or has been poor and working class. 

I’m including all versions of this movie but a special shout out to the Muppet version because it fucks the hardest. 

100/10

How the Grinch Stole Christmas (2000)

Listen I’m not even in realms of joking with this one. This movie is THE anti-capitalist film of the holiday season. 

WhoVille commercializing Christmas and a fixation on consumer culture to the point where anything and anyONE who cannot be commodified -- aka the GRINCH -- is alienated? The Whos rediscovering that people should be cherished over material items once it all is stolen and they must confront how empty the holiday has become??

Cindy Lou becoming disillusioned in Christmas -- at an age that coincides when many children (those who celebrate Christmas at least) lost belief in Santa and had to wrestle with what the holiday means with the magic gone and they’re more aware of the rampant consumerism that taints the season?? Her resolve to find a meaning that goes beyond material consumption because if a holiday founded on goodwill doesn’t extend that goodwill to everyone, even those society deems undesirable, then what’s the point???

The Grinch despising Christmas because he is unable to participate and isolated from the Whos and also the better qualities within himself? His alienation serving to demonize him further as it allows the public to narrow his valid criticisms of the holiday down to him being different and thus inherently predisposed to evil?? And hmm isn’t it interesting that a LOT of this demonization comes via Mayor Augustus “generously paid for by the tax-payers of Whoville” Maywho, Mr. 1% himself.

The upper vs working class divide evident in the light show competition between Martha May and Betty Lou Who?? The opening scene of the shopping frenzy that mirrors our own consumerist culture and overworking of retail/poster workers??? This entire monologue:

“That's what it's all about, isn't it? That's what it's always been about. Gifts, gifts... gifts, gifts, gifts, gifts, gifts! You wanna know what happens to your gifts? They all come to me. In your garbage. You see what I'm saying? In your garbage. I could hang myself with all the bad Christmas neckties I found at the dump. And the avarice... the avarice never ends! ‘I want golf clubs. I want diamonds. I want a pony so I can ride it twice, get bored and sell it to make glue.’" 

MARXIST KING. MENTION IT ALL.

1000/10

[annebelle93]

The Brother react on seeing MC cry for the first time - older brothers

After everything from S1, none of them expect to find you crying over human things. The sight of you throwing them out of their balance, they try the very best to cheer you up.

TW: a bit of Angst; family expectations and fights (I guess)

Lucifer

Redirecting your mail to the House of Lamentation had proven exponentially harder than Lucifer anticipated. Opening a portal on your front door undetectable to humans decidedly took much longer, as he refused to ask Barbatos to help him to do so. But at the end, he smiled to himself. Proud to be the first one to see your beaming face and hear the squeaky incomprehensible words you said as dashing upstairs to reach your phone, with an important looking envelope torn apart in your hands. Of course, he expected the acceptance letter to reach you, after all, he saw all the work you put together and the late nights at the library. Nonetheless he took great satisfaction from your achievement. Perhaps having a scholar in the house would inspire his brothers to become more diligent with their studies. Calmly, Lucifer set the tea cup on the table. He had given you enough time to tell the news to your human family, now it was his time to celebrate. He was thinking Ristorante 6 first, and then, who knows? He turned the knob after hearing the softest hum from your voice, still smiling to himself. But his smile dropped to a frown upon staring at your red eyes, accompanying the trail running freely down your cheeks. “I have to go” you reply to the phone, turning your back to the paralyzed demon on your door to rest your forehead on the bedside “Yes, I’ll call later. When I have time” hadn’t he been so heartbroken by the sight, Lucifer would definitely be impressed by your control over your voice, like you rehearsed so many times it would be impossible to tell you were crying unless they could see your reddened face. “I knocked” he announced while closing the door. “I didn’t hear” you took big breaths before turning back to him with a weak smile “but it’s ok” “MC, were that…?” “I didn’t get a full scholarship” you reply resting your head on his shoulder as he sat on the floor by your side, carefully placing the envelope on the bed “my family expected me to” you sigh. A sound so tired you suddenly sounded hundred of years older “it’s just that I’m starting to feel like it will never be enough for them, you know?” You tried to laugh, but it turned to a loud sob mid sound. “If your family fails to take pride in your accomplishments” he held your hands, pulling you closer and under his cape “perhaps I should step in and do it in their place?”

Mammon

How dare ya keep the great Mammon waiting? He stomped all over the corridor to your room, mumbling. It was finally his day alone with you and you dared be late? Unforgivable. Mammon had a whole day of activities planned and you couldn’t afford to lose a single second. Even if he was actually five minutes early. “Oy, Mc! What’re you waiting for?” He shouted busting the door open, only to be rendered speechless a moment later. Flustered, the demon looks around, resting a hand on his neck. A few feet’s away, lies your unlocked phone. A photo of a couple dressed in white smiling at the camera, glowing. “What is going on?” He asks, grabbing you phone and looking away, while you curl even more, hiding your face in your knees. “Nothing” you mumble tearfully, ignoring the shift in the mattress “Any of them an ex, or something?” Mammon begins to poke the brand new crack on your phone’s screen and you vigorously shake your head. “It’s foolish” timidly you peek at him, embarrassed to be seen “Ya my human” he mumbles “I tell what it’s foolish and what’s not” “They were supposed to be my best friends” you confide in a child-like tone “I introduced them and they didn’t even call me to their wedding” “S-so what if they didn’t call you?” Mammon jumps out of the bed, pulling your hand “Sure, is nice to have a lot of friends, but you don’t need to hoard thousands of them! You need only the best, and I’m the best of the best when it comes to best friends for ya!”

Levi

Sitting at Levi’s room doing absolutely nothing had became a very important part of your routine. His room, being so cold and silent, was the perfect place for you to build a blanket fort and recharge the batteries. And after that particular week full of demands, errands and tasks, you really did need a recharge. As usual, Levi didn’t pay you much attention, very focused on the latest update of this month’s favorite game, giving you enough space to wander aimlessly in the social medias of you D.D.D.. Long enough for you to decide to check the updates from the human world. He turns at you with a smile after beating the final boss to find a sniffing bundle of bedspread. “MC!” He shouts sprinting to the tub “is the room too cold? Are you having allergies?” Without removing the blanket from you head , you hand him the D.D.D. With a picture of a smiling human holding a painting. “What do you think of this?” “I don’t know” he scratches his head “it’s nice” “I knew it” Levi hears a contained gasp as you pull you arm inside the covers, hiding everything but your feet. “M-MC” his hands close around the edges of the tub to stop them from shaking “I’ll be out of your room in a minute” “No” hastily the demon jumps in, siting close to you but never touching “you are c-crying. The lord of the shadows would never let Henry leave while crying” “Thank you” you mumble pulling the covers closer to your body “but it’s nothing important” You both remain silent for a while, Levi picking the end of his nails, blushing by the second, and you hiding between knees. Eventually, you sigh. “We studied together. Kind of have the same tastes, do the same things” you grab the sheets over your head, covering your face in embarrassment “I don’t know, I feel like they do everything I do, but…” “Better?” You uncover just a bit of your face, enough to stare at him with big dewy eyes. “I guess some people are better than you at some things. But it doesn’t mean they are better than you. And you are not special because you can draw, or paint, or sing, or whatever” he shrugs and lean closer to you, allowing you to rest your head in his shoulder “you are special just because you are” “You should listen to yourself more, Levi” you smile faintly and hold his hand for a second before he stands up blushing “D-don’t g-go normie on me n-now!”

This ended up being VERY self indulgent after a few bad days I had, to the point I’ve being avoiding to post it not to expose myself. But I thought maybe someone else had a bad week and could use some demons bros being nice. I’ll post the younger brothers soon, I was afraid to put them all together and have a post too long.

And now the part 2 is here

[contreparry]

Omg please do "A chase on horseback" from the Scarlet Pimpernel prompts for our buddy Ted Templar? I NEED IT

The sequel to this Ted Templar post, and a more faithful interpretation of the prompt, I now present “Ted Templar, A Chase On Horseback” for @dadrunkwriting (and @biblioteknician)!

Ted Templar wasn’t much of a rider. Not a lot of places to ride to back home, and horses could be pretty damn intimidating when you got up close to them. Big ol’ hoofs. Big damn teeth. But they grew on you, little by little, and when Ted Templar came in to help streamline the messenger system because an old friend asked (“C’mon Ted, you know I wouldn’t trust my mail with anyone else, you’re not just the best in Kirkwall but the best in Thedas. Take this on as a favor for me?”), well, Ted didn’t like backing down from a challenge.

It was a damn big challenge. A sense of responsibility might have been the thing holding these messengers together, but it was one measly little thread, stretched so tight it might snap at any moment. Stressed messengers. Stressed horses. No communication whatsoever, and every single messenger had... well Ted wished he could meet their mothers because he had a feeling if he did he’d finally understand why Ysolde kept ten knives on her person at any given time and why Wilfred always hoarded hardtack. So much damn hardtack.

But it was getting better. He won a few battles. Lost a few as well, but progress was being made. The horses weren’t run ragged, so Dennet was happy, which meant he wasn’t shouting at messengers, which meant they weren’t as stressed. He managed to chat with some of the Inner Circle- Blackwall could be found at his carpentry bench and had some sage insight on the roads in Orlais and Ferelden, which was good, and there was the funny elvhen lady, Sera, who liked to pop in and cheer them all up with some grand stories and information from the inns and towns up and down the roads. Friends helping friends, she always said before disappearing. Funny girl, that one. Mysterious. Ted didn’t know what to make of her at all. But ah well, he thought as he took a long sip from his morning coffee (imported, but the cook said he wasn’t the only one who enjoyed the drink so he figured the small luxury was fine). He was ready to enjoy a slow day in the stables, where he’d go over the latest maps and reports and reorganize their routes to best ensure safety and punctuality-

“Coach! Coach, there’s a problem!” Samuel exclaimed as he raced into the stables, his broken (now heavily bandaged and splinted) leg barely slowing him down. “Loose horse!” He nearly hit his horns against the doorframe, even though he ducked to enter Ted’s small office at the end of the stables. Ted sighed and rose from his seat, downing his coffee in one great gulp. Sad. He was hoping to savor that, but he’d just have to enjoy his coffee tomorrow with extra gusto. Right now, duty called.

The horse was racing around the yard, frantically shaking its head like a snake, dark eyes wide and wild, golden coat gleaming under the afternoon sun. Her dark mane and tail fluttered in the wind like flags. The horse was saddled, and there was mud on her legs. Her flanks were wet with sweat as she cantered and whinnied and looked pretty damn stressed for a horse. Wilfrid and Lucia sat on the fence as Ysolde chased the horse around the yard, an apple in her long-fingered hand as she tried to tempt the horse to come to her.

“C’mon, Buttercup,” she pleaded with the horse. “I can’t chase you all afternoon, I have a message to take over the mountain, sweetie- Fucking Elgar’nan’s Balls, why must you be as smart as a halla and three times as willful?!” The horse snatched the apple and danced away, back towards the main gate and bridge as if she wanted to cajole them all into a game of chase.

“Go on, Ysolde! You can catch her!” Lucia cheered, her short legs kicking wildly as she leaned forward to shout her encouragement. “You’re her second favorite person, after all!” Seemingly encouraged by the power of positivity, Ysolde managed to snatch Buttercup’s reins and lead her into a gentle trot that turned into a cool-down walk. Yep, solid horsemanship right there. Ted might not be a rider, but he learned the basics, and you always warmed up and cooled down yourself and your partner before and after a run. But where did Buttercup’s rider go?

“Now what’s all this ruckus?” Ted asked, startling his three messengers. They looked around the stables, as if expecting the errant rider to magically pop into existence. Ted half-expected it to happen as well. Lots of strange things happened in Skyhold, and if Mr. Tethras weren’t so insistent that he had to come and fix up this message system...

“Oh Maker’s Bloody Ballsack,” Dennet breathed out, appearing like a ghost in a horror novel at Ted’s shoulder (Sure, Ted believed in ghosts, and he hoped that ghosts believed in him, but it didn’t mean he liked being surprised like that!). “Did Buttercup come in here alone?”

“Far as I know,” he replied. Dennet’s face paled considerably. Not a good sign, but they all dealt with the worst. But nothing could prepare him for what Dennet said next.

“Shit. Ted, that’s the Inquisitor’s horse. She took her out for a morning ride.”

Well that was bad news. He hadn’t met the Inquisitor, only saw her at a distance once, speaking with Mr. Tethras, all bundled up in furs with her dark hair neatly pinned up around her head like a crown. She seemed... well, remarkably well-adjusted, considering the chaos surrounding her. All that stress couldn’t be healthy.

“It’s about noon now,” Ted remarked. “Any idea where she was headed?”

“Only that she promised to stick close. Her Ladyship is a skilled rider. Something terrible must have happened,” Dennet muttered. 

“Samuel! Ysolde! Maps!” Ted hollered. “Lucia, get up to the Inner Circle, go find Jim so he can raise the alarm with the scouts. Wilfred, we’ll be riding out to start the search as soon as we find the search are-”

“FUCKING CREATORS!” Ysolde shouted as Buttercup slipped away and raced out of the ring, recklessly leaping over barrels and fences to  

“Change of plans, y’all keep up with that, I’ll go after the horse!” Ted ordered, and he hopped on the only other saddled horse in the ring- Ol’ Rusty. Ted wasn’t much of a rider, and Rusty wasn’t much of a racer anymore, but between the two of them they should manage to chase after a war mare. Right? Got to keep hope. Got to believe.

So they raced. Past the tavern, past the training grounds, past the chapel, past the watch tower, Buttercup galloping wildly, Ted and Rusty right behind her. He thought she might slow at the bridge, or maybe hesitate at the fork in the road, but Buttercup turned a sharp left and went down, down the narrow hiking trail towards the river, and that-

Was the horse leading them to the Inquisitor?

“Go on, girl. Heard of men leading horses, but horses leading men?” Ted muttered as he and Rusty closed the gap as Buttercup’s gait slowed. He bounced with every step as they went down the path, and when it widened up at the riverbank Ted sidled up to the mare and took the reins in hand.

“Well, show us where your rider is, girl. Ysolde said you’re as smart as a halla, and they’re some bright deer. Go on, show us what you’ve got,” Ted murmured. Buttercup tossed her head and trotted further down the bank, further away from the path and the fortress, but not completely out of sight. And there, in the brambles down the embankment...

“Inquisitor? Miss? You down there?” he called out. The brambles shook, leaves and spring flowers falling to the muddy earth.

“Unfortunately, yes,” a woman’s voice groaned.

“Can you climb out?” Ted asked as he dismounted, Ol’ Rusty content to chew on spring grass while Buttercup looked expectantly at him with her big dark eyes. Smart horse. Smart as a dog. He’d definitely let Dennet know that she deserved the good oats. Maybe some alfalfa.

“I’ve turned my ankle, but with help I can manage it,” the Inquisitor replied, which was awfully positive of her. “Thank you for coming for me, Messere...”

“Ted. Ted Templar. Just my name, not my profession. I run-”

“The messenger corps. I heard. You’ve done good work,” the Inquisitor remarked, and when a hand clad in a dark brown glove reached out through the brambles, Ted grasped it and dragged Inquisitor Trevelyan, leader of the Inquisition and the fearsome mage who closed the Rift, out of the muck and mud and brambles.

“That’s one way to end a horse chase, if you don’t mind me saying, Inquisitor ma’am,” Ted said as the Inquisitor, dressed in simple riding gear, dark hair full of leaves and twigs, face scratched up and a little tired, but smiling, emerged from the bushes.

“It certainly is. Horsemaster Dennet is going to kill me. I promised him I’d be careful,” the Inquisitor mused as she looked up at the fortress above them. Ted helped her limp her way over to Buttercup, then helped lift her up into the saddle.

“Best get to apologizing then, Miss Inquisitor. Ma’am,” Ted replied. “But Dennet’s a softie under all the bluster. You could make him some tea and bring him a scone and he’ll be right as rain. Me, though, much prefer a coffee and a biscuit- not the cookie type, love my sweets but I’m watching my health, you know...”

And so they rode back to Skyhold, Ted Templar and the Inquisitor, and sure, she was a little quiet, but she wasn’t too bad as a traveling companion. She needed to read her maps, though. Maybe if they had a moment to spare he and the corps could mark out safe riding paths around Skyhold. Couldn’t have anyone else falling off their horse and twisting an ankle, after all, and after today Ted Templar was going to learn how to properly ride a horse.

[stevetonyweekly]

SteveTony Weekly - May 9

Happy Sunday!! Here’s what I’ve been reading this week. As always, leave your fic authors some love if you read and enjoy their stories! 

**Indicates my recent favs 

~*~ 

pretty little thing by areiton (MCU/2K) 

Steve isn’t little. He isn’t fragile and precious, a treasure to be hoarded. Maybe he never was, but now, now, now with his too big body and his broad shoulders and miles of muscles--

Now he sure as hell isn’t.

It was the Fourth of July by seratonation (Proposal AU / 12K) 

Based on The Proposal. Steve has been Tony’s assistant for 3 years when he finds out that Tony is actually not American and is going to be deported. Tony talks Steve into getting married but Steve insists on seeing his family first. Tony invites himself along to make sure his plan doesn't go awry, but unfortunately Steve’s family is actually pretty amazing.

Object: Matrimony by BladoftheNebula (A/B/O /38K)

Omega Tony Stark craves adventure and an escape from the life his parents have planned for him in New York. He places a listing in a marriage catalogue to seek a match with an alpha out West, and Sheriff Steve Rogers answers his advertisement. But finding a nice alpha doesn't mean it's all smooth sailing from there...

- A Mail Order Bride AU -

***Papa Don’t Preach (Series) by FestiveFerret & SirSapling (Ultimates/102k) 

"Whoever did this has a reason, and Stark needs to be with someone who can protect him. He won’t exactly be able to protect himself like this.” Fury looked at the baby consideringly. “No, it’s you, Steve. Besides, he likes you. Suck it up, soldier, you’re stuck with him.”

Treasured by HashtagLEH (Warlord AU/9K) 

No one in Manhattan spoke their language – or at least, no one fessed up to it – and so all of the negotiating was done with Natasha acting as translator. Steve didn’t think it mattered, because he had told the ones who would leave the ship earlier that day that he had no intention of accepting any treaty, that they would lay siege to this city before the week was out.

But then Natasha stilled beside him at something that Stane had said to them, and Steve focused in, more alert. Something was wrong, he could feel it, but he didn’t know what with everyone speaking what may as well be gibberish all around him.

“He offers an unmated, untouched Omega,” she told him, not taking her eyes from the bald man at the other end of the table.

An unmated – what? He wanted to trade an Omega? Did he not have any idea of an Omega’s value? Surely his resources would be better spent whisking the Omega away to safety before the city was set to waste.

Natasha was looking to him for direction, confirmation, he didn’t know. So he told her, his voice placid and even and giving nothing away. “Accept the negotiations. Don’t let on that I want that Omega the most."

***Take My Heart Clean Apart by Mistmountainking (MCU/13K) 

He’s tired, so tired of waiting, tired of touches with no meaning, tired of holding his breath when Steve’s in the room, tired of keeping this love to himself.

 “I can’t—I can’t, if you don’t mean it.”

***

Tony comes home exhausted after an SI event. Steve acts as welcoming committee. It's an old, careworn routine they've perfected over the years, but tonight ends up going in a very different direction.

And the world keeps spinning by Perpetual Motion (Comic/15k) 

He considers everything he knows. His keys don't work. Bucky's in his apartment. There's a gun to his head. He doesn't have his phone or his Avengers tag. "I died."

T is for Thong by Elspethdixon (Marvel616/2K) 

Naked might actually have been slightly less distracting. Tony was… almost wearing… a tiny, tight scrap of red fabric that most definitely didn't hide anything.

***Orbiter dictum by schmevil (MCU/7K) 

Steve is at the sink, washing the few dishes that pizza for two generates, when he realizes that Tony is in love with him.

Nothing important happened today by thedevilchicken (MCU/17K) 

Steve's stuck in a time loop. Sometimes he's not sure he wants to get out of it.

***Off grid by Letterblade (MCU/7K) 

Steve and Tony go camping, bears are the greatest threat facing America, and tick tweezers are the best invention of the decade.

Some form of electricity by FestiveFerret & SirSapling (AU/57K) 

Steve doesn’t know what he’d do without Tony, and thank god he has him, because after getting the phone call that Bucky’s alive, everything is a blur. But Tony gets him there, all the way to Germany. It isn’t until he’s watching his friend lie motionless in a hospital bed that it really hits him.

Bucky is coming home, and he’s coming home broken.

The stark-tangled man with a crappy plan by Serinah (A/B/O / 13K) 

*At first, it seemed to be an easy job: find the O, secure the O, and hand him over to his guardian and the fiance. Simple. Unfortunately, the omega wasn't onboard. At all.*

OR:

Steve has to return a runaway omega to his guardian Mr. Stane.

Stories we never tell by ashes0909 (A/B/O / 32K

One could argue, it was none of Steve’s business. The omega was obviously bonded to the alpha, even if the bond was one-way. That bite was all society needed to overlook the transgressions that Steve had witnessed on the sidewalk. But Steve wasn’t society, and waking up decades in the future, he’d been disappointed by what had changed and what had very much stayed the same.

As hoarded as gold by FestiveFerret (Soulmate AU/12K) 

Steve wakes up in a new world, in 2008, and joins the Avengers where he finally gets to meet the man whose name has been imprinted on his skin since birth. But Tony Stark is closed-off, distant, and disinterested. While Steve is trying to come to grips with finding out his soulmate doesn't want him, he can't help but notice the decline of Tony's health. Worried about his heart after the arc reactor, Steve steps up to help him, but when Tony confesses what's really wrong, it's not at all what Steve expected.

Patience by FestiveFerret & SirSapling (AU / 8K) 

Try as he might, Steve just couldn't seem to paint the arc reactor quite right. And it was driving him crazy.

***Love’s such an old-fashioned word by AnnieD (MCU/11K) 

Steve gets the very brilliant idea that he and Tony should date, but Tony needs some convincing.

I saw cap kissing santa claus by Mizzy (Marvel 616/7K)

When Tony dressed as Santa for Queen County Hospital's annual toy drive, he wasn't expecting Steve to recognize him...as Iron Man.

Disjointed by veryvincible (Horror /16k) 

His hands— cold, clammy, lightly trembling— reached for the glass of water on his nightstand. His grip was tight; he knew he would drop it if given the chance.

It was lukewarm against his lips, and wholly unsatisfying. His forearms shook slightly with the tension, the tremors in his hands causing a noticeable shift in the water. It had a syrup-y quality to it as it dipped back and forth in its glass, almost, though he hadn’t noticed the difference in texture as he drank. The longer he stared, the lower the viscosity, as if it noticed him perceiving it and willfully moved with less ease.

Christmas affair by Neverever (MCU/6K) 

Tony thinks that Steve will be proposing to him after many years of living together, except that Steve has a secret that could ruin it all.

Unknown caller (Do Not Engage) by gottalovev (Non-Powered/13k) 

Steve had one job: exchange a couple of texts with a guy who thought he had Natasha's number, and let him down gently. It ends up being a lot more complicated than that.

***Genesis by teaberryblue (Ultimates/35k) 

Reluctant to make the truth about their secret weapon known, the American Government tells the world that Captain America is a man named Steve Rogers. According to public record, he died, tragically, in 1945, and he became legend.

In 1998, the Avengers find a body trapped in ice.

She's alive.

Her name is Eve.

She has Captain America's shield.

[the-fandom-is-now-my-life]

This thing's existence is to be blamed on @anonymouscake you gave me too much inspiration to write this

After the exams were taken and returned to williams to grade them, all the eyes were in him

"That would be our class for today, we have a few minutes but start packing" William started stacking the exams. After not seeing any of the students start moving or packing he couldn't help but wonder if they truly remembered their bet "you can start packing, we will see again after holidays"

"Teacher! You promised" one of the students chimed in

" Yeah! You owe us a story. To think our teacher wouldn't honor his word" other student agreed

" You truly remembered, didn't you? I still have to grade this. So unless you want to be late to your next class I will see you after Christmas" nobody moved " well?"

" Your class is our last" those words made him stop

" No, you have modern literature with mister johnson" williams returned to stacking the exams " did you finish, mister Adams?"

" Professor johnson had an emergency last moment and couldn't find a replacement in time"

" You are awfully insistent" he sighed softly " if you wait for 5 minutes I can grade your exams"

Everyone stayed in place and William started grading, after a few minutes of silence William stood up

" The results of your exams are…" Williams didn't calculate that his bribery would make such a big effect "outstanding. If I knew a story was all I needed to make you study I would have started a long time ago "

Cheers resonated in the classroom. All their efforts didn't go to the trash.

" Average 96.5" he didn't truly want to tell so much about his love life, but a man doesn't back away from a fair bet" well, what story do you want to hear now?"

The room got filled by silence and now the true question arises, what story? Maybe their wedding, or their first kiss. But at the end they decided on their engagement.

" Our engagement? It officially started around 7 years after our meeting, I was 21"

" So you married at 21? Your marriage must be pretty old by now" said a voice in the back

" Mister stone, if I might know, how old do you think I am?" No one dared to breathe, less say anything " I am waiting mister stone"

" Your latmiearly thirwenties?"

" I am not going to bite" followed by a laugh " 24 years old. That is my age. Now where were we?"

" Who are you writing that letter to?" The now young girl of 19 wrapped her arms around his neck, snuggling against it

" Your father"

" Why? Do you want to have a business meeting with him"

" You could say so"

" If so I could have said him directly, my dad quite likes you. It will be faster"

" Still, it would sit bitter in my mouth to not do this as it is customary to"

" Is it really a serious meeting isn't it?"

" Nothing bad happened, don't worry about it" William patted her head, laughing softly.

" Stop treating me like a child! We only are 2 years apart!" The girl protested. Now sitting on a chair behind his desk

" Yet still you behave as a kid" William teased without stopping writing

"Hey!"

Before they could keep quarreling louis entered the room

" Here is the tea"

" Thank you louis!"

" Thanks brother. If I could ask you to do a little favor could you send this to the mail?"

"Yes, of course"

" I really appreciate it. Now, should we have tea?"

"Eeeh! Professor moriarty sent his engagement letter without telling his wife?!" A student cut William

" maybe they talked about this beforehand? And this was some kind of surprise? Maybe her father is strict about who will marry his daughter?" Another student theorized

" I think it is a good theory" another agreed

" If you wanted to hypothesize about my life you might as well not have asked"

" Sorry professor"

" For context, YN, My wife, was going to get married to another noble-" William tried to explain but was cut again

" So you were jealous! I didn't peg you as that kind of man"

" I-" William Inhaled before deciding to not say the total truth, in fact the noble had a record of all his wives dying weeks after marriage. But ignorance was bliss " yes, I was jealous" he indeed had a little attraction towards you, but brushed it off more often than not.

Mister YS gave him a meeting. The door seemed to be heavier than usual,as if it was tempting him to go away, but he already set his mind on it.

He steps into the room, the lights on even if the aura of the room was far to gloomy for it to match

" William, son, do you know what you sending this letter mean?" your father sat straight in his chair, as if he was really to catch his prey

" I am pretty sure I know what it means" leaving his case by his sit he sat down " I want to get engaged with YN"

Taking a huff of his cigarette your father continued " you are a bright young man I'm sure you catched on to general merryland wish to marry my daughter. What is your counter for that"

" The general merryland has had 10 wives in a period of 1 and a half years. All of their deaths of mysterious circumstances. I fear her marriage with the general may cause her assesination"

" Kid, as much as I might love my daughter the general won't take a 'I think you might kill my daughter' for an answer". He is an influential man, he can't risk to anger him"

" But he might take an "apologies, my daughter is already engaged, we were yet to announce it"

" The general is a man who is well known and has reasonable wealths and reputation, if you blamed him for murder it would make us lose face, and is well settled too. You on the other hand, just settled and started working as a professor of university, what can guarantee my daughter to live well with you? Give me ten reasons to let you get engaged"

" I knew you were going to say something like that, I bought my finances book with me,you may judge if it's enough or not" even if he was playing innocent he knew the wealth he managed to hoard was a bit too nice for his age " plus, wasn't the general going through a bankrupt? His family business hasn't been talked about a lot lately" planting the seeds of doubt is an important part of his plan, if not the most.

" One reason down. nine left."

"So you tried to get him to let you get engaged for three hours, I can see how he let you, if my future in-law tried that I would give in too" a few students agreed

" It was tedious and long, I will have to admit. But it was worth it" admitted William.

" Then, how did you break the news?"

" I originally wanted to do it with the two of us alone. But it wasn't possible…"

After getting her father's blessing, now the only thing left to do was to wait for YN to go come to the state and break the news privately.

" Brother? What are you doing?"

"Oh? Nothing louis, I'm just waiting for YN to arrive to have tea"

"Then I shall put the kettle on" Louis was about to leave but noticed the bouquet on the table" brother you bought her flowers?"

" Yes. You will understand soon enough"

" I am off to the kitchen"

The fragrance of the flowers William brought was quite strong, intoxicating if you must. If you asked albert he would say they smell disgustingly sweet

" William, I haven't seen you at lunch, where were you?"

" I was at a meeting, albert. It was of dire need to have it as soon as possible"

" Who did you have a meeting with?"

" YN father"

" Mister YS? Why was it? If I might know"

" You will know soon enough"

" Then, I'm off to check some papers, I will skip tea."

A few minutes went on for you to arrive, in that moment William had everything ready for it to go smoothly. Everyone was busy, albert with his paperwork and louis had already brought the water but still had some chores to do so he would let you two alone for a while

" Liam!" The girl came almost running to him and hugged his torso "You haven't invited me in a few weeks, were you mad at me"

" Not at all" he brushed some bangs that came out of their place " I had to sort a few things out"

" That makes me happy"

"Should we go and have tea"

" If you want to"

After some idle chatter and small chat he thought it was the right moment

" YN" he calls you while sitting up to kneel in front of you " I already got your father's blessing but the word that matters the most is yours, so what do you say, will you let me be your husband in a future" taking out the engagement ring

The sound of copper hitting the floor snapped you out of your bubble

"I-"

" Louis, I see you finished all the housework"

" I just wanted a minute for ourselves" the girl lamented before noticing albert holding a few papels behind louis " if three wasn't plenty. well, they were both going to know soon so I guess it doesn't matter that much" she stood up after taking the ring and putting it on the correspondent finger" I was going to give you this in your birthday, but I guess I could give this now" she said before handing a cigarette case with a few designs engraved. " Father told me to return early so I must get going. Let's talk again soon"

" So Teacher does mess up sometimes"

" I don't truly think it was his fault, how was he supposed to know they were there" argued a back row student

" You got what you wished for, now go to your houses it is late and your families must be waiting for you"

The whole classroom started to run towards the exit. While a chorus of " Merry Christmas teacher!" And " see you soon" flooded the room. even if he liked to teach sometimes it was exhausting.

[ka-za-ri]

Obey Me wants to do Too Much and in an attempt to please the fans, it’s failing them instead.

Based on the post @1abbie7​ made regarding the common complaints players seem to have with OM and its choices as a game. I just wanted to put my two (very long) cents in while looking at OM as if it is the gacha game it truly wishes it was.

MAJOR DISCLAIMER: this post is based on my experiences and is not a reflection of the community as a whole. These are observations and personal thoughts and should be taken with a grain of salt. Also, please feel free to discuss or correct me if I have any of the information wrong. For reference, I’ve reached 5-3 in OM!, 9-2 in AL, and 6-17 in AK.

Now that we have that out of the way… ON TO WHAT I WANT TO SAY. Buckle in folks, I’m rambly and I have a lot to say. Obey Me! Has a lot of potential, and it’s a shame that a lot of things Solmare does are not helping it grow in a way that it could.

So this post is MOSTLY going to be comparing Obey Me!’s (OM) gacha and gaming experience with Azur Lane (AL)  and Arknights (AK) since I feel like both those games have a very good f2p model and don’t really have any PvP/Ranking system that affects the main gameplay. I will have other examples from other games that I’ve played before as well.

Ignoring any issues with storytelling and plot holes, since I feel like there are people who are much more qualified to speak upon that than I am, I’m just going to look at the more game and gacha experience.

EVENT SPACING, GAMEPLAY, STAMINA REFRESHES:

OM! As far as I know, is marketed as an Otome game with gacha and … Rhythm??? Game??? Elements? (I’m not quite sure how to even describe the ‘battle’ stages tbh) to break up the story stages. With the battle stages being the main way you can farm for materials to power up your cards, the bottlenecks that are built into the game are surprisingly super frustrating.

OM! Does not have an auto battle option, but it does make up for it by allowing you to sweep the stage once you’ve received 3 stars. This does make resource farming much quicker, but this also means that your stamina will disappear faster than ice in a desert. Coupled with the fact that the battle stages don’t really have much interaction or strategy for a good portion of the beginning of the game, there’s no real replay value in trying for older stages unless they have the resource you want to farm.

I guess I can let this pass since interaction isn’t what’s really marketed, but it IS important to keep your audience logging in and eager to play. At Level 40-ish, my current stamina cap is around 70. WIth the average stamina cost of a regular stage being 5 AP, and the hard stages being 8. This means you’ve got 14 normal stages and less than 10 hard stages in a full bar of stamina. Assuming I log in twice a day to get the bonus AP, that’s really not a lot of stamina to work with and just enough to maybe get through my dailies. 

Having that little stamina makes farming resources exceptionally difficult especially for the high requirements needed once you get about half-way through a devil tree. Add that to dealing with farming event points almost constantly, with your limited stamina pool, you’re pretty much forced to purchase extra stamina to meet the requirements to finish said events to get the rewards. Assuming you spend all of your daily Devil Point reward on Stamina, that’s only 180 stamina a day which makes for a really tight run IF you’re aiming to get everything in an event. 

ADDITIONALLY, this is also the fact that events and new lessons don’t seem to be announced prior to them dropping. Almost every gacha  game I’ve played before will give you a few days notice before an event drops whether it be via Social media or through in-game mail. This is to mainly generate excitement and allows players some time to prepare, whether it be hoarding what stamina refreshes they have or saving premium currency for gachas to hopefully get the chase card/unit that they’re looking for. Not being able to prepare makes it difficult to stay engaged considering you CONSTANTLY have to have resources/stamina to partake in all the events and you can’t plan accordingly.

AK announcing the current event two days prior to it starting in game and on twitter:

AL’s announcement on the 12th, almost a week prior to it starting. Maintenance was on the 17th when the game reset.. (In game notices update regularly and I don’t have a screenshot of what it would look like since maintenance has already passed.)

OM! basically giving people on twitter about 24 hours notice of a new event dropping followed by announcing that the new lessons are available on the day it drops:

I understand that OM! Devs may want to keep the new cards a surprise to players. If stats and skills played a more prominent role in the game, maybe there would be a better way to tease these events to build up hype. As of right now though, it feels like a surprise slap in the face to force players to purchase currency in order to maintain that stamina requirement. IF Solmare is adamant about having back-to-back events, at least provide players with a roadmap or a calendar so they can pick and choose what’s important to them.

Just… Don’t let it become like the FEH calendar…

Please, do not let it become like this.

In my opinion, it feels like OM! Has a bit of an identity crisis. It sorely wants to bank on the money making powers of a gacha game while also clinging to the claim that they’re an otome game revolving around the plot. It’s hard to really promote the plot when it’s locked behind a power requirement that a majority of players will not be able to reach.

With how difficult it is at the end game, players are most likely going to look for transcripts or screenshots of new lessons instead of playing the main storyline in order to save what little they have for the constant limited events. Either give the players time to recoup resources to prepare for your events so they can pull for all your new cards or lower the difficulty cap to give players the story you’re emphasizing so much. 

Tl;dr: back-to-back events will burn out players and not announcing them prior does not allow players to prepare resources, forcing them to drop money on the game. The amount of stamina it takes to complete an event AND level your cards does not make it f2p friendly.

GACHA RATES AND PITY SYSTEM:

Call me spoiled, but I feel like OM! ‘S banner rates are too low. Consider the following image for the current banner pool:

That’s a combined 1% to get your UR and that’s still not going to be guaranteed to get what you want. Consider the following rates from other games:

Azur Lane:

(Ultra Rare was a new rarity that was added with this new banner. Before that the highest rarity you could pull is a Super Rare)

Arknights: 

Fire Emblem Heroes: 

Final Fantasy Brave Exvius: War of the Visions

For a game that’s always introducing new cards, you’d think that OM! Would maybe consider raising those rates so people won’t be so heartbroken when they don’t have enough currency for a 10 pull. (Especially if they have been spending what Devil Points they have on stamina to complete event stages) Yes, a majority of banners have bigger pools and  the chance for a specific 6*/UR/SSR is ultimately lower; but considering in OM!, you have stories and characterization locked behind devilgrams connected to these cards, the rates are pitifully low. At least in the other games listed, the units/cards/operators/ships aren’t tied to stories. 

I will say, the pity system isn’t absolutely abysmal. Keep in mind though, this is based on the assumption that you’ve saved up for 100 pulls. Considering how difficult it is to save that much currency while being f2p 100 pulls per banner is a tall order and impossible without the help of goldie or somethin. The frequency of new cards along with the difficulty obtaining gacha currency creates an extremely predatory model of currency purchase. With no guarantee of when event banners will be rerun, you’re pretty SOL if you make it half way through this pity system and you’re sitting on shards you can’t use. 

Players will get tired of this model mega fast. Especially with these kinds of rates. Assuming that your luck is the worst on earth, you need 2,700 Devil Points to reach the pity breaker. That’s more than two packs worth of Devil Points. So we’re looking at over $160.00 USD to get a guaranteed UR. Seeing as new banners come what feels like every two weeks or so, you’re looking at over $300.00 USD a month JUST for the gacha. If OM! Was purely a gacha game without such a heavy emphasis on the characters and the stories/scenarios they unlock, I might be able to overlook it. However, since the cards themselves unlock cheats for events and outfits and devilgram scenarios, that’s a steep price to pay, so I kinda just have to say… Yikes.

Tl;Dr: For a game that has so much content tied to limited cards and events, gacha rates for OM! Feel too low. Pity system is average as long as you have the currency to complete all 100 pulls. The reason to purchase premium currency is predatory and likely will not be sustainable in the long run. 

MONTHLY PACKS AND PREMIUM CURRENCY

So, we can agree that if you don’t have some cash on hand, it’s not going to be a real fun time to play OM! So, where do you spend your money? Let’s take a look at what they offer in terms of premium currency and how far that will get you. It’s also almost 3AM here and I’m losing my patience and filter, so excuse me if I sound more angry here than in the rest of the post.

So, here’s the basic Devil Point Shop for reference: 

If we equate Devil Points to stamina, you’re looking at about 100 stamina per dollar you spend. But let’s be real, Solmare makes their money off of gacha and them pretty pngs ‘cause y’all want those spicy devilgrams and sweet outfits for your secretary.

To even get a 10 pull, you’re looking at $22.00 USD worth of premium currency. (Why they didn’t make the $19.99 pack a full 10 pull is BEYOND me tbh.) Now most gacha players that I know who are willing to go all in on a specific banner will want to spend a pack, which means they’ll go for the most expensive option as it is the most bang for your buck. That’s an $80.00 pack for approximately 4 10 pulls and some change. Let’s compare that to the price of some Originite Prime from AK: 

It takes approximately 33 OP for one 10 pull in AK. 1 OP = 180 Orundum (currency used for gacha) Keeping this in mind,  if you don’t count the first time purchase bonus, at first glance, it’s overall more expensive to purchase this currency SOLELY for gacha purposes.

Here are the packs offered for AL: 

If you’re using gems to purchase the cubes needed for the gacha, it takes about 600 gems for 1 10 pull. One pack will net you about 8 10 pulls. Out of all the models we’ve looked at, this is honestly the most value for your dollar specifically for gacha purposes.

Take into consideration what the premium currency is used for. As stated above, 1 DP = 10 stamina. 1 OP = 1 Full stamina refresh in AK, so that’s a pretty equivalent exchange rate. (I won’t go into the AL stamina and gacha system since it differs too much from OM! To really make a good comparison.)

But, what else can DP do? A quick glance under the “Items” tab in the shop, you’ll see that it can also purchase Keys to read your devilgram stories (integral to your gaming experience), Demon Vouchers for summoning, Glow Sticks to help you in battle (Integral to gameplay), and consumables for your Surprise Guests to raise intimacy (arguably connected to gameplay). Compare this to what you can purchase with your OP outside of summoning currency in AK: Furniture (cosmetic) and Skins (Cosmetic). That’s it. 

What I’m trying to say here is that Solmare has made DP the currency for so many things that affect the game itself. This subtly pressures the players to purchase DP in order to maintain the same quality of life that they might have experienced at the beginning of their gaming experience when the level ups came fast and when the rewards were plentiful for completing all the beginners quests.

“But wait!” you say. There’s ways to earn DP passively through dailies! You’re right! You’re given 18 DP per day for completing your dailies. That equates to 1 10 pull per 2 weeks if you’re diligent in keeping up with all your quests and log in daily. Comparatively, AK will give you 2,800 orundum per week for completing all your quests and the weekly annihilation runs, so just short of 1 full 10 pull in the game. However, AK gives you the specific currency used exclusively for gacha. This leaves your OP relatively free to be used for stamina refreshes, or you can hoard them for when new skins come out, or you can use a few to supplement your missing orundum for a banner pull.

Without knowing what could be coming up next in terms of events and banners, OM! Makes it very difficult for you to hold onto your DP due to the sheer stamina sink that events can be. Unless you’re really good at optimizing your resources, you’re likely going to be spending DP on things outside of gacha, making it difficult to save those 20 pulls in a month.

Tl:dr: DP is used for too many things that aid in gameplay which leaves less for gacha, forcing players to make a choice between moving forward in harder story stages or unlocking card specific stories.

Alright, but let’s say you don’t have enough for packs, but you still want to support a game. You don’t wanna whale ‘cause you got bills to pay, but maybe you’ve got enough to be a minnow or a very sad and small dolphin. For this, most people turn to those delicious monthly packs. Usually, the monthly packs or subscriptions are really a good bang for your buck. Usually, the bonuses that these packs provide will add up to a value that is much more than your initial investment in them. So, let’s look at what OM!, AK and AL offer, shall we? 

Let’s break down what the VIP gives you since there’s quite a bit and it’s presented in a less condensed format. So, at first glance, I have to ask… “VIP login bonus?” What does that even mean? When you look at the details the description is as follows:

I’m sorry, what? This vagueness will not help sell this pack to me. Most monthly packs will give you premium currency right away that is equivalent to the amount that you paid. You can see that both AK and AL list this and also let you know exactly what else you get for the next 30 days. There’s no vagueness in what these packs provide. 

Next thing to look at:

I’m sorry. What? I don’t understand why a max AP increase is the choice for a VIP perk here. This is banking on the fact that you’re going to be playing at max efficiency and will be under max stamina in order to take advantage of the refill timer giving you the extra AP. Why OM! Doesn’t just give you the stamina in your mail is beyond my comprehension. This is just saying “yeah, you could have more stamina if you’re playing this game and making sure you’re below your cap. I … no. Just why.

NEXT PERK: 

No. This is useless for higher level players. Perks should benefit all players, not just your new players that you’ve tricked into spending money ‘cause this pack is only $9.99 a month. I’m so angry at this I don’t want to look at this anymore. NEXT.

This is a fine perk. Paying for easier passive resources is fine. I don’t have anything to say.. Next.

Oh thank fuck. An actual good perk. Passively getting the harder to get resources which cuts down on your already limited farming? Hell yeah.  Also fine in my book. NEXT. 

“Spend money to spend more money! Because we know this monthly deal ain’t shit!” is all I’m getting out of this.

Finally, I need to talk about this: 

So… you’re telling me that for $10.00, I’m going to get $6.00 worth of DP and I won’t get the full value unless I STAY subscribed? If I cancel and then resubscribe, will that go back to 60 DP when I subscribe later? Why would you do this other than to give your players less than what they deserve? These packs are supposed to be designed to give you the value of your purchase and some extras as incentive to keep playing and coming back to pay. This just… as a first impression leaves a bitter taste in my mouth.

Also, let’s talk about the fact that you’re BILLED MONTHLY? Listen, I get that they’re trying to be ‘convenient’ so you can set this up and forget about it and reap the benefits, right? It’s about the same cost as a Netflix subscription, no big deal. But listen, that means they’re also banking on you to forget you even have this subscription if you’re a casual player and you’re going to continue to give them money Stop that Solmare. Bad.

I’m too tired to look at sales. Just as a quick glance. the discounts and deal are meh at best.

Tl:dr: Monthly pack is underwhelming and likely not worth it. Automatically being billed monthly is the worst thing I’ve seen all week and this was written in 2020. 

SOME SUGGESTIONS? IT’S NOT ALL BAD, I PROMISE.

So, how can Solmare improve? OM! Is honestly one of the most stylish otome games I’ve seen and has a lot of potential to continue growing its player base if the devs directed their energies in the right direction. Right now, OM! Suffers due to the fact that it’s trying to do too much in too little time. For a game that’s less than a year old, it’s pushed out enough content in the last three months to last six. Dialing back the gacha and collecting elements to focus on the story and a slower pace would really help, if you ask me. 

OM! Really needs to slow its roll. Events are losing their impact from being rolled out at such a quick pace on top of current pop quizzes, new lessons and banners. Every week I feel like I’m watching the more hardcore players yell at having too much to do when everything is layered on top of one another. This is not inherently a bad thing. Having a lot to do keeps the player base engaged and excited for your game.

The problem arises when you’re not giving your players any time to recover from events and just throw things at them all the time. Finding a good balance between events and downtime is difficult and it likely won’t happen overnight, but it would be nice to see them maybe give a week or two to really let the impact of events sink in and let players really find time to nurture or use the new cards/rewards they just got.

First step in the right direction would be giving more notice prior to events and lessons. Just something more than 24 hours before, or the day of. Not providing a notice makes it feel like these things are being rushed. 

If Solmare is adamant about keeping the pace it’s set up, then give us a roadmap or event calendar of when new lessons or pop quizzes are coming. They can keep the details of the lessons and quizzes limited until closer to the actual dates, but at least this will let players prioritize where they want to put their resources.

Gacha rates for URs being raised to 2% would likely make a reasonable difference. When so much story and cosmetic content is tied to a UR or SSR cards along with their frequency, it serves to likely benefit them to make it more accessible to players. Locking so much behind luck and a paywall makes it more obvious that they only care about the money that they can get from the diehard collectors in the game.

Make skins obtainable by DP. Stop locking them behind event cards. Allow players to have easier access to cosmetic features. It’s a less predatory model than what they’ve got right now. Granted, Lonely Devil has sort of helped this issue considering they’ve grouped event reruns all in one place to play at your leisure, and if I remember some of the event cards have skins tied to them. Still, just… idk sell the skin on its own. It makes more sense than to pray that you roll that UR with the one 10 pull you have. 

Make resources easier to obtain passively. I’m sure I sound like a broken record, but limited resources make this game difficult to enjoy. You’re barely through doing one thing to level up a card and you’re met with a giant wall of requirements for the next step. AL has commissions and the dorm, AK has the base. OM! Has Jobs, which gets you grimm and some items if you’re lucky, but it definitely needs expansion considering the power checkpoints late game.

Hell, just making some of those DP purchasable items actually farmable might help.

Get a publisher to work with you. I know Solmare has been around the block and this isn’t the first otome game they’ve made, but I definitely think working with a publisher who’s familiar with the ins and outs of a proper gacha helping them will benefit them. Having a publisher will help ensure that there’s adequate funding for the game to be as good as it can be. Not only that, you’re looking at a better social media presence which the player base can interact with and get more attached to.

 Literally, having a publisher could solve so many pacing and announcement issues since they would be in charge of when events come out and likely has a better eye on how players react. This way, Solmare can concentrate on making the content as quality as they can and not inundate people with a new lesson or event as soon as it’s done.

Tl:dr: Solmare, please get a proper publisher so they can help with quality control and balancing your game. Please. I’m begging you. You have so much going for you please don’t let this game die before it turns a year old.

Ok. it’s 4 AM and I spent most of the day writing this post. If you’ve made it this far, congrats and I’m sorry for being so rambly. I’m so sorry if none of this made any sense in the end.  I’m sure there are points that I’ve missed out on like stage replayability and a more engaging battle mode, and the lack of any sort of meta which makes the lower rarity cards you pull feel completely useless…  but uh… I can’t think anymore and I haven’t had time to farm in my horny ship girl game. Feel free to let me know your thoughts or discuss! 

Thanks for your time and I hope y’all have a good day. Happy romancing some demon boys!

[lemonbalmgirl]

LemonBalmGirl’s 2020 Witchy Wishlist (USA)

This year has generally sucked, but hopefully Witchy Wishlists can help it go out with a more positive bang?

My name’s Mary & I live in Portland, Oregon, USA. I haven’t posted much this year, because again, things haven’t been super great. But I love participating in Witchy Wishlists. ♥

If you need my mailing address or anything else, feel free to either message me on Tumblr or email me at lemonbalmgirl @ gmail dot com.

1. Amazon sucks, but unfortunately they’re still one of the easiest ways to send gifts to others. So here’s my Amazon wishlist.

2. Supporting small businesses & artists is good, so here’s my Etsy wishlist, also.

3. Speaking of small businesses, go check out Portland Button Work’s Witch Shop! Portland Button Works is owned by my dear friend, @upthewitchypunx​ & like a lot of small businesses, she’s had a rough year.

4. Maybe get me a gift certificate from Portland Button Works? Please enable my book-hoarding ways, because hey, whatever brings you joy in this hellscape of a year, right? Bonus, this also fulfills the above wish! Huzzah! :D

5. I would really like to try out an oracle deck, specifically the Vessel Oracle Deck and/or the Inquire Within Deck. (Yes, these are also on my Etsy list.)

6. Recommend some music to me! What’s your favorite band? Your favorite album? How come? What soundtrack stirs your soul? What’s your favorite 80′s song to dance terribly to?

7. Go check out @torque-witch​‘s awesome Etsy shop, Death’s Head Divination! Torque carries great witchy thrifting finds, gorgeous stones, and provides a variety of tarot readings.

8. You should also go visit @tainbo​‘s shop, Awaksupe Gage. They make & carry a variety of items, like some really great crow shirts & gorgeous hand-beaded jewelry.

9. Donate to your local food bank or pantry. The number of people replying on food bans & pantries is extra high due to the pandemic & unemployment. If you can donate some food, please check with your local organization to see what they need the most. And if you can donate money, many organizations have deals with local stores & food production companies and can get several dollars worth of product for each dollar of actual money they spend.

10. It may seem cliche, but please keep hanging in there and continue masking & social distancing. It’s hard, and it feels like things are just getting harder, but safety is still vitally important. Please do your part to keep yourself and those you love safe from this stupid virus. ♥

Thank you!

(The gifs are from “the Hogfather”, which is set in Terry Pratchett’s Discworld universe. I’m a big fan of Discworld’s winter holiday, Hogswatch. ♥)

[persimmononroll]

Jodie slinks into wherever she goes when she’s not Here and then meanders into the old wizard’s kitchen. She’s not sure if he’s actually a wizard but if an old vampire who commits crimes against nature for fun says he is, who is she to argue?

He’s measuring the walls again. One of the little cats, one that’s dangerously close to being educated, holds down the end of the measuring tape while Neht scribbles measurements into a notebook, not paying any attention to her arrival whatsoever because she’s uncommonly quiet and he’s wearing headphones and probably listening to ABBA. When the days start getting shorter and night falls earlier, sometimes the walls start shrinking little by little unless he takes care to adjust his perceptions. She thinks he probably wouldn’t have this issue if he just installed some electric lights instead of relying on old-fashioned methods because candlelight makes the room seem smaller, but while he’ll concede to the usefulness of fridges and computers, his willingness to try out new technology only extends so far. It’s not like she can’t see in the dark, so the dimness at night doesn’t bother her, but she thinks Neht makes things more complicated than they need to be.

Vampires, you see, are stupid.

Jodie’s very good and helpful, so she pours all of the groceries into a pile on the middle of the table for him to deal with and then plays with an empty bag for awhile until she remembers that she’s a grown person and grown persons probably don’t play with bags. Neht doesn’t notice her. He pats the little cat’s head and starts work on the next wall. It’s not that she’s jealous of the cats because they’re only dumb little creatures who don’t know anything at all, not even how to read, but she likes it when things are about her and doesn’t like it when things aren’t about her. He takes measurements for a bit. She gets tired of standing by the table so she perches on the counter that she’s not supposed to sit on because counters are for food and not for people. The little cat nudges against his hand. Jodie decides that the logical course of action is to knock a tin cup off the counter as hard as she can.

“Goodness, dear. We mustn’t do that, please,” he says with a sigh as he removes his headphones. The cat stares at her with wide, unblinking eyes and she stares right back because it’s really important to let these little dummies know their place in the household. “Oh no, please don’t sit on that, it’s terribly unhygienic. I thought you were gathering information in the Midwest, weren’t you?”

She doesn’t need to say that she’s not going to get down because both of them know exactly what she’s going to do. She has to be bribed first. Neht makes token protests but there’s nothing on Earth that’s going to stop her from doing exactly what she wants when she wants.

“Yep! I made a notebook! I’m bored though, so I thought I would get you groceries because I’m a really nice and a good person and you forget to eat. No blood though. I didn’t want the grocer think I was a vampire or anything. You guys are gross and stink,” she says, gesturing to the mess on the table. “Praise me.”

Neht stands up and makes his way over. He looks the same as ever but he’s been a bit slower these days, probably because he’s filled with gunk.

“What’s all this, hm? Let’s see: octopus balls, anchovies, milk, here’s a can of sardines, pie crust, there’s a can of crab-meat, my goodness, is that an entire eel? And nothing I eat. I suspect ulterior motives.”

Jodie shrugs.

“I got you a bottle of simple syrup. You eat that, don’t you? I’m really nice and good getting you simple syrup, so you should make me seafood pie. With sausage, just for me! Pie for me. Pie, please.”

“Mm, I can’t possibly imagine that flavor profile. If I must, I suppose,” he says because he has chronic problems telling her no because she’s perfect and a baby. Of course he can’t imagine it; he can’t even taste it.

“...The last I heard, you didn’t have a job. How, pray tell, did you pay for this?”

“I stole money!” she says proudly because she’s very smart and resourceful.

“Jodie, no.”

“I mean, it was your money. I’m allowed.”

She’s not, actually, but he doesn’t really make much of a mess when she takes it because it’s not like he uses it for much of anything and he is responsible for her existence. The electricity and gas in the cottage are technically stolen. He grows much of the fruit he eats and doesn’t spend much on clothing, not when he has such a hoard. He buys cat food, pie material, craft supplies, and blood. Sometimes he buys books.

"We’re going to have a discussion about that, you little rat, even though I scarcely think you’ll listen. Now, did you hear anything interesting?”

“Sure, loads of things. I mean, it’s boring but you care about it. Say, have there always been so many vaporvolphs in Maroa? I sniffed so many of them. They stink like burned sugar, bleh. Actually, I sniffed a lot of new sniffs on people. More aliens touching down, right?”

“Please don’t be unkind to the volphs, Jodie, or else they’ll gobble you up and they won’t be sorry for it one bit. And please do get off my counter, you menace. You’re going to pick that cup up or I won’t make you anything at all,” Neht says, shooing her away because he hates her and doesn't want her to be happy.

She grumbles but does get off the counter because she is hungry and doesn’t want to eat what’s simmering on the stove. It’s not that she won’t eat blood because she is a consummate carnivore but he’s doing that thing where he simmers fruit with blood and plants are gross most of the time.

“You’re no fun,” she says, sticking out her tongue. He sticks his out right back. “Oh, your wife, the one with the garden, asked me to give you your mail. I put it in my backpack.”

”Thank you,” he says. “You’re an utter little demon but I appreciate it. If you’re bored, I did receive word of something very interesting going on in the west.”

The pie’s good, even if Neht doesn’t appreciate a good bit of fish the same way she does. She gobbles down piece after piece because she’s always been a greedy piglet and falls asleep in front of the fire like in old times. In the morning, she slips into Nowhere again and sneaks off to California for awhile until she gets bored again.

[irwinkitten]

alpha’s and omega | poly!kayshton

notes: i really am not sorry for this one at all. @sexgodashton​ has her wonderful A/B/O!sos going on and she got an ask about what the poly!kayshton dynamic would be. Combined with what she replied to the anon with vs what i sent her in a text because both of us are absolute trash for this ship, with her permission, i took the idea and literally two hours and 3k later this exists. enjoy. again, don’t like it? don’t read it. warnings: smut word count: 3k lets all accept that i’m never gonna be able to write something small for this ship.

donate to my ko-fi here

- 

The first meeting is always the most important. It’s the one that they denied each other because they both presented as Alphas. 

When they found that spark, it was undeniable. 

At first they’d hidden, inside of the backlash they would receive. Fans had thought nothing of Kaykay spending time with Ashton, the belief that two Alphas mating being impossible.

They’d slipped up one night, both of their ruts possessive and dominating, the carnal instinct to mark one another overwhelming everything else. 

 At that point, they were in love and didn’t care. They had each other despite how rare it was. It was their little bubble. 

And then the floodgates opened when they’d announced their mating to the world, fans and friends alike scathing in their comments and harsh words. 

“Another alpha? Could she be any more selfish?” 

“Did it have to be her? Anyone else would be better.”

“Isn’t there supposed to be a submission to one of them? How would that work? They can’t be together.”

When Ashton had returned home to find his beautiful, bold and stubborn mate curled up in tears, he felt his hatred towards the world for their judgement. With each tear he wiped off her face, he felt his anger at their words. With every sob that he soothes with gentle tones, he wanted to fight back. 

But Kaykay wouldn’t let him. She knew how fighting back could damage much more than their reputations. It would hurt his career. 

“We’ve done enough damage as it is. Don’t make this worse, please.” Her pleading tone and big eyes had him caving in seconds. He could never deny her. 

“We’ll get through it.” 

But having to hide from their friends, despite their obvious marks, they were unhappy. They loved each other, no one could deny that. But there was no joy anymore since her tears. 

Days out turned into secret getaways, weeks off turned into becoming reclusive so they didn’t face the backlash of any media. 

There were small mercies of understanding with his band and their families. At least, their immediate families. They knew the urge to claim, to mark was overpowering. And they had a safe space from the harsh words and dirty looks. 

But it was exhausting. 

—

It’d been an easy day for you, trying to get things finished up so you were able to get through your heat in semi peace. You tracked the days between almost religiously and despite cutting it close this time, you’d not managed to take the time off work beforehand. 

It left you scrambling to get what you needed so you wouldn’t have to face any unmated Alphas in the middle of your heat. The last thing you wanted was one of them taking full advantage of you that wasn’t in control. 

So when you ran into someone, their steady hands gripping you so you didn’t hit the floor, your body reacted and you inwardly sighed. 

Yet another Alpha. 

But lifting your gaze, lips ready to apologise, your voice was stolen at the sight of the dark haired vixen in front of you, your eyes unable to leave her face, studying every bit of it as if she were about to disappear. 

Her hands never left your arms and you couldn’t find it within yourself to push her off, partially wondering if you’d finally met your mate. 

Then you spotted the mark on her neck and your heart sank. But you continued to drink her in. You knew that if she had someone good, she wouldn’t reject that mark for you. 

“Sweetheart, what drove you to run full speed at the paps before disappearing?” A breathless male came into your view and your mind clicked into place what your heart was screaming at you. 

Not mate. But mates. Both of them. 

His own gaze held yours and you fought the urge to back down, to bare your neck to them both. 

“That answer your question, love?” She breathed in return and the side of you that was begging you to submit to them both wanted to melt at her voice. 

“But—how?” The words finally left your lips before a wave of questions started to get closer. The vixen holding you grimaced before turning to the dark haired male, his own features marred with a frown. 

“Here isn’t the right place. Not with vultures. Reckon we could make it to the riverside?” She asked him and he glanced behind him, almost calculating before his eyes returned to you. 

“Do you have a car nearby, sweetheart? I’d rather you not have to be faced with those vultures so soon after meeting you.” And you flashed them both a cheeky grin. 

“It’s around the corner. C’mon.” You took the hand of the dark haired vixen and she followed you willingly, your mate following quickly behind. Your car was small and nifty, but it did the job. 

You didn’t expect the soft moan from the beauty beside you as you pulled away in the car, keeping as far from the hoard that appeared around the corner as you could. 

“So despite helping my mates’ getaway, I would quite like to actually know your names.” To other Alpha’s the comment would’ve been borderline rude. But their eyes lit up at your attitude. 

“Kaykay.” Came from your vixen. 

“Ashton.” Followed on from your dark haired third. 

You couldn’t help think that they suited their names well as you gave them yours. 

“Where am I heading? Because as much as instinct is telling me to hurry the fuck up, I don’t want to crash and I don’t want to get marked in my car.” A groan erupted from Ashton. 

“God you’re gonna kill us both.” He whispered before pulling in a dark breath, his fingers gripping the seat in front. Kaykay’s hands were gripping her thighs tightly. 

“Still doesn’t answer my question.” You fired back and a growl escaped, earning your first act of submission. 

“We can head back to ours. No unmated alphas and we might actually be able to talk before anything else.” He muttered, earning a snort from you and a sigh from Kaykay. 

He was careful with his directions, and you kept your hands clamped on the wheel to stop yourself from leaning back to touch him or leaning over to touch her. 

It was driving you wild. 

When you reached their home, for a moment, instinct settled in deference to the awe that swept through your body at their home. It was beautiful.

But despite the beauty that made you want to explore the home and gardens that surrounded it, your impatient mate had taken a firm hold of your hand, her eyes flickering to Ashton before you, and pulling you towards the house, making you laugh. 

“Impatient much.” You teased her, but there was a side that was creeping up and you were almost certain that if one of them marked you in that moment, it would trigger your heat that was already so close to the surface. 

“You’ll understand why. Now c’mon.” The petulant whine made you grin as you followed dutifully behind her, your senses suddenly overwhelmed with the scent that was them. 

Ashton was immediately behind you, his hands and body steadying you as you stumbled back, your eyes closed as a soft moan escaped your lips. 

“Soon, little mate. But we need to explain, help you understand.” His words were promising, helping you ground yourself before they guided you into the living room. 

It was open and spacious, the couches large enough that it would comfortably fit ten people with space to spare. A sliver of entry rushed through you before instinct squelched it down viciously. 

Kaykay was firm about having you in her lap, her hands around your waist as her nose buried itself into your neck. You tried not to react to it, but with her so close to the spot, you were fighting a losing battle until Ashton settled next to her, draping your legs over his lap. 

They way you were sat would’ve been comical if it wasn’t for the fact that both of these Alpha’s wore serious expressions. 

“We mated about eight months ago. At first we couldn’t  understand it. Two Alpha’s being mated is almost unheard of.” Ashton started off. You nodded in understanding at his words. 

“We both fell into our ruts at the same time.” Kaykay’s voice was quiet and you understood the implications of her words. 

“You couldn’t fight instinct.” It wasn’t a question, but she nodded her head at the statement. 

“It caused a lot of problems for the both of us. Especially with Ashton’s career. With us being so public, it’s dangerously easy for fans and the media alike to pry where they’re not wanted or needed.” Her words were scathing and your hand reached up to rest on her cheek. 

“It’s no one's business but yours, well, ours now, I guess.” You watched her eyes light up at your words, Ashton’s own features lifting up into an easier smile. He carried on. 

“We’ve been wondering if we were missing something. We’re mated, in love. Living life. But neither of us have been happy. It’s been such a battle to deal with the same people that insult us behind our backs.” You frowned. 

“Regardless of how it started, you’re both mine.” The snapped words of possessiveness was not something you’d expected, but the thought of them hurting drove a splint into your heart, making your chest ache for them. 

Your words had a profound effect on Kaykay, a moan falling from her lips as she pressed them where you knew her mark was going to be. 

“Please. I can’t take this anymore.” Her plea was something you hadn’t expected and you could feel the heat pool in your belly, your arousal flooding the room. 

“Please.” You finally whimpered, giving into the demand that had been driving your body and mind insane.

Her nose brushed the spot that had you tilting your head to the opposite side. Her lips mouthed the area, almost as if she were some sort of lioness, mailing her food before you felt her teeth sink into your skin and your body just sang. 

“Fuck.” You whimpered and you could feel the clawing desire run rampant through your body, earning a wide eyed look from Ashton. 

“Mine. Ours.” Kaykay murmured against your skin before her nose identified the change in scent.

“I was close to my heat as it was.” You whimpered out, the almost agonising feeling rushing through you. Kaykay was quick to have you straddling her, your hips rocking into her to try and find any form of relief. 

And then Ashton presses in behind you. 

“I need you to stand up little mate. You’ll get our knots I promise but the clothes need to come off.” His voice was husky and demanding enough that the need to obey overwhelmed your desire enough to follow his order. 

Their hands were all over you as they pulled off the clothing, uncaring of the living room. You couldn’t even find yourself to care that it was in their living room. You were needy and desperate. And willing. 

Ashton pressed up behind you and his hand wrapped around, fingers sliding into you with ease, making you whimper in return. 

“Alpha please.” Your whine has his fingers beginning to work you, slowly adding in a third finger which had you panting for more. 

You watched as Kaykay knelt up on the sofa, coaxing Ashton to step you forward, despite your jelly legs. You could see her own arousal slowly building, the thought of her knot in you pushing you closer to the first edge that you were barely hanging onto with Ashton’s fingers working you so well. 

And then her fingers joined and you let out a keen whine. 

“Cum little omega. Show us how good we make you feel.” Ashton’s demand caused your body to obey, a strangled noise escaping as your legs trembled through your orgasm, coating both of their hands in your cum. 

Kaykay used her fingers to slide and collect your juices, her fingers wrapping around her own arousal that had your mouth watering, her fingers building herself up as you watched in awe of her. 

“Isn’t it so pretty, little omega? All for you. To knot you and breed you like a bitch in heat.” His words snapped something inside of you and you pushed Kaykay’s shoulders so that she was sat back on the sofa once more. 

You sank down onto her knot slowly, your mind clouding over as you felt Ashton’s tip stretching you, and you whined as he slowly moved. 

The stretch made you wince, you’re breathing heavy as Kaykay held you tightly. 

“It’s okay little mate. Say something if it’s too much.” But your voice couldn’t say anything. The stretch was uncomfortable with both of them, but god the feeling of both of them was driving you to insanity. 

“Move. Please.” You finally gasped out. Kaykay moved first and your eyes rolled back, head resting on Ashton’s shoulder. 

The desire came clawing back, and you rocked your hips slightly, indicating you were fine. It took some timing, but they found a pace that worked for all three of you. 

Your mind was growing hazy as they worked you, a second orgasm washing over you with no warning, your walls tightening around them and earning a growl from both of them. 

“Gonna get both our knots little omega. Both of us are breeding you. Is that what you want? To be filled with us?” Ashton’s words worked wonders as the rhythm changed again and you could tell they were both close. Kaykay came first, the knot expanding as Ashton followed seconds later, the feeling of both of them buried in you sending you through your final orgasm as Ashton’s teeth marks you on the opposite side to Kaykay’s. 

It takes some deft manoeuvring on Ashton’s part to get the three of you comfortably lay on the couch, pressing together as your mind tried to wrap itself around the new bond you had with them. 

“Sleep for now little omega. We’ll try and get stuff done in between keeping you satisfied.” Ashton hummed, his fingers gently tracing his mark. 

Your body relaxed into their touch, satisfied in that moment that you were full of both of them and they’d claimed you so soon. 

— 

When your heat had passed, you felt different. It was like you’d managed to integrate yourself so easily into their daily routine.

But now that your heat was finished and you’d marked them both in return, unwilling to even let one person judge your bond with them, it felt right. 

When you’d marked them both, it had been various times. You’d marked Kaykay first in return, cornering her in shower when she tried to tease you. She hadn’t minded, the result meaning that she was knotted firmly in you and you’d practically become her limpet. Ashton had laughed himself hoarse at the two of you settled on the bed, still damp from the shower. But he understood. 

You’d gotten Ashton the following day, sat on the counter just talking whilst he cooked. When the food was plated up, he’d stepped between your legs to rest against you, just needing the excuse to touch you whilst the bond was still fresh. 

But your heat had surged forward and the need combined with instinct had driven you to pull him closer and mark him. He hadn’t expected it and Kaykay still grins every time your fingers danced across your mark on him. 

You were certainly not what they expected in their lives but you were everything they needed. 

When the first rumours started to pop up, so did the nasty comments. Comments that seemed to slide off your shoulders because you knew that these comments were likely from the same people who’d brought them sadness. 

It wasn’t something you tolerated and they’d witnessed you berate a journalist in the middle of the street when they’d tried to harass them for an interview. 

That was when people started noticing the second marks on their necks. 

Their families had already been introduced to you, the sharp wit and sass to match falling sideways when you met their immediate families. Kaykay has teased you, asking where her brass pup had gone and you’d gotten so flustered by the term of endearment that you’d spilt your drink down you. 

Ashton had gotten a kick out of that. 

But for both of them, they’d been worried about your reaction to the press, to the intrusion. But by the time you’d moved in with them, barely a month after mating, it didn’t bother you. 

It was when Ashton found himself laughing more as you fooled around on the floor with Kaykay, that it truly struck him that you were their missing piece those first eight months. 

The both of them smiled more, and he was never as tense. Touring was still difficult, but it didn’t feel like a weight on his chest that was demanding him back home. 

His arms opened to catch you as you launched at him, grinning at your pout. 

“I really thought I’d catch you off guard then.” Your grumble made him grin as his lips pressed against yours gently. 

“I think I can confidently say that when it comes to you two, that is never gonna happen again.” And at the combined laughter from the two of you, peace settled in his body. 

-

if you wanna be in a specific poly!kayshton taglist, just hmu

@sexgodashton​, @loveroflrh​, @converse-luke​, @wokeupinjapanisabop​, @cashtonasfuck​, @iovehemmings​, @sc0ttish-wildfl0wer​, @tobefalling​, @cal-puddies​, @itjustkindahappenedreally​, @hemmingsmendess​

[evasivaardilosa]

I am 25 almost 26 yet I still catch myself having some of the same thoughts I did during my teen angst phase, and some stuff still hurts

Sometimes I just feel like I don’t exist. Not literally, but in the sense that, I just spend so much time isolated and I have so few people I interact with often (irl, there were literally days in which I wouldn’t see anyone at all), that... you know in movies, when someone goes back in time and prevents someone from being born or from being at a certain place at a certain time, and when they go back to the present everything is very different? I feel like if someone did that to me nothing would change.

And also I have this persistent idea that no one really knows who I am, that they only know a distorted version of me. I used to feel I was a liar until I learned about autism and masking and that hiding how I feel and what I think is a way to try and protect myself and not a evil scheme to deceive people. But it doesn’t change that I have all these feelings and thoughts I never shared with anyone. Even the things I try to share, it’s so common that people misunderstanding them and I don’t know what I am doing wrong or if it’s the people I try to share them with that just aren’t meant to understand. So even if I “exist”, the one people care about and such isn’t actually me

I know these thoughts are not true, I do therapy and I learned a lot from it. These thoughts are not true, but even thought I know it they can still come back and sometimes they hit me. Like today.

And I think about how I spend all day at home (bc of 🦠 and of who I am as a person), being mediocre at video games, randomly liking and rt-ing and reblogging and hoarding pictures in various social media, making dumb and meaningless additions to chat conversations, working poorly on a project that at the moment seems doomed to fail, and even if it doesn’t fail, it is still of interest for maybe four people in the world- every time someone asks me about it and asks what does it does, expecting it will be something like the apps they know... ah, this one does a very specific thing that maybe someone someday will need done in order to do something I can’t even imagine - I feel like a waste of space because nothing that I do changes someone’s day, or life, or the world.

But there’s one thing, one thing that I consider the most important of the things I do (well, I do it when I’m able) which is writing. People, real people read what I write. I’m very average when it comes to quality, I guess, and I don’t always post consistently. I am no big name author, I don’t think I ever was, even in times I had some popularity. But people read it, and sometimes they like it, which I know from kudos and comments, and there isn’t a day I don’t receive my ao3 kudos mail.

Like, every day there’s someone somewhere who is reading something I wrote!

These people, who read my things, I know some of them. From chats, tumblr, their own fics. But most of them are strangers. Most of them are probably not native speakers of my first language, maybe don’t even speak it at all. Many of them never heard of my hometown. I will probably never meet most of these people in my life. Maybe I won’t even set foot near their hometowns. But I exist for them, I existed for them in the minutes they took to read my story - something that I wrote, in which I put bits of me and my experiences, something that wouldn’t exist if I didn’t exist- and I made they feel something. Maybe my story cheered them up on a bad day. Or maybe they were angry they wasted their time on something so bad. I made them feel something using the product of the only way I know to be 100% honest.

Because I am honest in writing. I don’t project all of me in all characters, but when I write sadness, I write it how I know, how I experience it. When I write love, I write it how I fantasize it. I write things I wish happened to me, and things that happened, and tropes I like, things I like to read about. So even a fic, even a story I wrote for someone else’s ideas (requests, prompts, etc), all of it has a lot of me.

And I can show it to people and some people read it, they feel something, and I know it lasts a short moment, until they open their next read, but it doesn’t matter. Because it’s a moment in which I existed for someone I don’t even know, and I gave them a feeling, and I showed them a bit of the real me.

Maybe someday they will remember the story again, will mention it to someone or quote it or recommend it (is this a dream? no but really I have had my work rec-ed by some amazing talented individuals at some points and it’s an amazing feeling). And I will keep existing. Maybe my old works in accounts I won’t touch again, being still there, maybe they still get visits. Maybe I still exist there.

And that’s all so amazing. Writing is a coping mechanism of sorts for me, and it is a hobby, and I do it for fun too and I do requests, have done rp, and it’s also gives me my daily kudos mail reminding me that I do exist

[lianabrooks]

The Ongoing Ita Bag Saga

It's story time!

Back in the Before Times when people could do things like attend cons I became enamored with enamel pins at Emerald City Con (Seattle) and just as quickly found I could lose them easily. After losing one of my favorite pins at DragonCon in 2019 I decided drastic measures must be taken.

I needed a way to save my pins!

In January 2020 I found the perfect, most beautiful, most wonderful cloud-shaped ita bag on a Kickstarter and I backed it in a heartbeat.

And then COVID hit... factories closed. The production kept getting pushed back and as people got vaccinated and cons are slowly reopening in 2021 I found myself still bereft of a bag.

It was time for drastic measures! Or at least going to Etsy and resigning myself to a less-pretty bag. Not an ugly one. Not a ridiculously expensive one. Not one that was still in production. Not one shipping from overseas (because the mail has been absolutely awful ... this is a local problem not anyone else's, but I needed the bag this year).

At the end of March I finally found one seller with two bags left from there earlier kickstarter and I ordered my bag 1-April.

... it never shipped.

Well, according to the seller it shipped, but must have been stolen.

According to the postal service and the shipping label it was never dropped off at the post office ever.

So I suppose it could have been stolen if the seller was using a courier service to get things to the post office. Or if they scheduled pick-up from their house. Anything is possible.

But it didn't change the fact that it was mid-April and I was still ita bag-less.

I emailed the seller who explained their theory and who said they'd send another.

I've been tracking it all week and it finally - FINALLY - got here.

... minus the insert which was supposed to come with it. I don't know if the seller forgot, or if they sold out, or if they shipped the insert separate, or what happened. But I really don't have time to wait.

Next weekend is ATOMACON. It's a (very) small local convention in South Carolina where we were able to practice social distancing even before the plague because South Carolina is not a hotspot of geekdom (or anything, honestly, the economy here is dire... but that's a post for another day). I'm fully vaxxed (yeah for being high-risk?). The other attendees I've spoken with are vaxxed. We'll be wearing masks. And I want to bring my pins.

Because pins are fun and shiny and I need a bag to carry my dice in (for the D&D game I'm playing Saturday night).

So!

I went to the garage where I have a ridiculous number of cardboard boxes. 1) Because we move a lot and this gives me box-hoarding tendencies. 2) I haven't visited the cardboard recycling center in awhile.

But that's okay! Because I found a piece of cardboard the same size as my bag and cut out an insert. An ugly, cardboard insert. That just wasn't going to do.

I was going to use some holographic duct (duck) tape but my youngest child insisted the bag was hers and so she got to pick what the insert looked like.

And, look, I fully understand I should put my foot down, set boundaries, and do the Proper Parent thing where I show my kid whose boss but - honestly - arguing with my child is not worth all that. It would make the whole experience unfun. Plus, as important as boundaries are, there's something to be said for letting a kid do crafts with you.

We are a family big on sharing everything. We pool our resources. We work together. We share most the bags.

Heck, my older girls borrow my shoes and everyone but my spouse has borrowed my wellies (rainboots) at one time or another.

So I figured I'd let kiddo help me with deciding what to do.

I admit, I was very tempted by the idea of an acrylic pour. Mostly because I just really like acrylic pours and I thought it might look good (although that paint is notoriously hard to get good cells with and I really don't love it like I wanted to).

But I worried the pour would take too much time to dry and be - ultimately - too thick for the pins. So we picked the purple spray paint I had on hand from another project, and then watered down some silver and painted over.

It's still drying, but the final effect should look like a moon with silvery clouds.

Once it's dry I can pick out pins to take with me for the con!