#not that i KNOW what’s coming in the afterlife necessarily but i’ve thought on all scenarios and like i have an idea of what happens in all

[spencereid]

what does it say about me that i have the concept of death and the afterlife down pat but i can’t fucking figure out how the fuck i’m supposed to live beyond basic survival. what does that fucking say about me

[jozor-johai]

Is Bran becoming a god? Can we count his future as godhood, or is his storyline proving the absence of actual gods? What's the difference? I don't even know the answer, really. Thinking about it, but sort of a long post.

I’ve always thought that there aren't really "gods" in ASOIAF, but rather “natural” (magical) phenomena that work in this world, and people have observed it, not understood it fully, and since created ritualized methods and folk-history to preserve the knowledge of such phenomena, attempt to explain the unknown, and sometimes to attempt to recreate the not-fully-understood.

Much of IRL religions have plenty of basis in similar things: how do you explain the (at the time) unknowable? Why does the sun only stay out for so long, why does night come, why does winter come and then spring? And, in a doubled effect, said stories serve to preserve the observable—well, we might have made up the idea that the daughter of the goddess of the harvest is in a joint custody situation with her mom and her husband, but the important part is we’ve noticed that when it gets cold and dark, it will get warm and light again six months later, so we shouldn’t panic when winter comes.

And then, of course, there are stories that remain to explain much more complicated and rarer concepts—why was there such a particularly large flood that one time? Why did the sun go completely black in the middle of the day that one time? How did we learn how to use fire, why do we write poetry, why did this war happen 400 years ago? Why are we being ruled by this one inbred family instead of growing all of our grain for ourselves?

As with all things, GRRM turns this up to eleven—What if, when Set killed Osiris and Isis brought him back to life, that literally happened? What if when Jesus was publicly killed and then returned three days later, that literally happened? What if there was a flood that literally covered the world, or a night that literally lasted a generation? What if religions that promised an immortal afterlife could literally offer it? How would that change what religions look like—or would it change anything at all?

Bran’s chapters in ADWD basically confirm some of the idea that magic out there, and it’s real, but it’s being interpreted as a deity—the North believes in the “old gods,” this half-remembered polytheistic idea of there being gods watching over you from everywhere in nature, but especially the Weirwood trees with their faces. Well, between Bran in ADWD and the Varamyr prologue, we get shown that these so-called gods are basically explainable: there is a way in which people, or at least the Children of the Forest, “live” forever in the ravens, or the Weirwoods themselves, and there really is this shared consciousness that one could tap into in death, like Varamyr almost does.

The “old gods” then seem like this half-understood, mixed up memory of this exact idea: there really is a presence watching you through the Weirwood’s eyes, there really is a consciousness living in the memory of nature. But it’s not necessarily ordained by any greater being, it’s just something that happens, if you know how it works, or if you’re taught it.

But then, does this make the “old gods” not really gods, because they’re just CotF, or humans, or both, whose consciousness survives in the trees and the ravens?

Or should we be looking at it another way? Perhaps those are the gods, and that deistic status is achieved through that joining. Perhaps, from that perspective, Bran is on a path to actual apotheosis by learning how to tap into the memory of the trees.

After all, “power resides where men believe it resides.”That idea exposes a weakness in power, as a king may only be a king if he has followers, but it’s also the strength of the concept: the people’s belief in kings make kings real. Perhaps it is the same with gods—believing those to be “old gods” is enough to define them as gods.

[knifesxedge]

stuck in funpoison world rn and you are The funpoison guy to me so please.. any spare funpoison thoughts for the poor?? 🥺

WHEE i’m honored!! and YES i would love to talk about them ❤️❤️❤️

FIRST AND FOREMOST i’ve been rewatching the mandalorian so i’ve been thinking about the fab four mandos au again which means that i’ve been considering mando’a again which MEANS i’ve been thinking about funpoison + “Ni kar'tayl gar darasuum” (“i love you” in mando’a, literal translation “i will know you forever”). AUGH AUGH AUGH AUGH AUGH AUGH. they are SOOOOOOO.

in unrelated thoughts, stream of consciousness style. they love each other SO much like before they’ve started dating kobra likes to make fun of poison because they will straight up just Stare at ghoul with this really big goofy smile just SO “anything you say, baby” but he also makes fun of ghoul because he’s always making excuses to touch them, to brush hair behind their ears and clean up their makeup for them and squeeze their hand. once they’ve started dating they’re SO shy with being affectionate around each other just because it’s so new but poison really loves being held and ghoul makes them feel safe so it’s not uncommon to see them curled up together on the couch with their hands wound together. and ghoul will blush and grin and roll his eyes whenever jet or kobra walk by but just sweep poison’s hair out of their face and tuck them a little closer.

ghoul likes to say they’re soulmates not because their love story lacked any hardship or was fairytale perfect from the beginning but because it WASN’T. and even though it wasn’t perfect, because life isn’t perfect, they kept running into each other. their lives kept meeting and intertwining for better or for worse. and ultimately what came of that was them both gaining an understanding of each other that blossomed into friendship that then slowly turned into being in love with each other. because they’d seen of the worst of each other right from the start and still ultimately said “you’re the one that i want”. for ghoul it means that the witch set their feet on a path towards each other, for poison, who doesn’t believe in the witch and barely believes in the idea of a higher power at all, it feels like maybe they could believe in destiny if nothing else.

oooohhh my god. i do not use tiktok so forgive me if i’m getting the source wrong but the one adventure time clip that’s like “you were a wonderful experience”/“you were everything”. in terms of personal flaws, poison is not necessarily always 100% healthily attached to their loved ones and i honestly think that ghoul’s death ends up being a kind of world-shattering life-altering event for them because he WAS everything. it’s like sometimes they don’t even know how to breathe without him. between the two, ghoul would have been better equipped to deal with poison’s death than poison was for ghoul’s not because he didn’t love them completely or because it wouldn’t have meant as much to him but because ghoul has been dealing with death of his loved ones from a very young age. it’s part of why he became so spiritual, because he let that belief that he would see his loved ones again, that they were safe and protected in their afterlife, be a comfort. poison doesn’t have that, and has never dealt with the death of someone so close to them before in a meaningful way. so it kind of breaks something in them. they don’t handle it very well in any sense.

on a less serious note i think ghoul loves to take poison dancing because it’s one of the only times that they’ll let their mask come off in public. they love to dance, they’re not fantastic at it, and unlike other times where they’ll feign disinterest in a skill if they know they aren’t good at it to save face publicly, if ghoul asks them to dance they’ll do it and they will honestly not focus on anyone else except for him. ghoul likes seeing them when they’re sweaty and breathless and happy and not caring if their makeup is running or if they look silly or how their clothes cling to their body. so a lot of date nights end up being “hey, there’s a band performing at this bar tonight” or “want to go to this party in zone two?” or “the roller rink is having a disco night on friday, want to go?” in fact, i’ve mentioned it before but their first official date is a couples’ night at the zones’ premier roller rink, Mega Moon’s, which used to be a lesbian bar before the wars and now is a locale for all sorts of folks but mostly LGBTQ-oriented :]

another thing i’ve mentioned before but ghoul loves to cook and party is not so great at it. HOWEVER, party DOES like to bake, though that’s not as feasible always in the zones. on the rare chance they get the opportunity though, they’ll get ghoul to help them — their excuse always being that they could use the extra hands but the real reason being so they can hang out together (and steal sugary kisses). i think their favorite thing to make is cookies but brownies are a close favorite just because those are GHOUL’S favorite & he’s written down his grandmother’s brownie recipe which is a hot commodity in the diner.

OH AND I HAVE TOUCHED ON THIS BEFORE but i don’t think i ever properly mentioned that they’re sun and moon coded. TO ME. more specifically day and night coded. i try to push that personal agenda with my writing when i can. when the day met the night……….

i think that’s all i have for you tonight. feel free to put a quarter in another time and see what i have to say then 👍

[honourablejester]

I have seen you put together a number of character concepts involving Warforged (with Silence, your Grave Cleric, being a personal favorite), but I was curious what your thoughts are on Warforged as a whole and how to characterize them? What themes do they play with, who are they? Basically, if you had the opportunity to rewrite Warforged however you liked, what would they be like?

Oh, I do love Silence too. Definitely one of my favourite concepts I’ve done. I’m so glad you enjoyed her!

As for the warforged in general … I love them, but artificial life has always been one of my favourite themes in genre fiction. And one of the primary themes when it comes to artificial life is that it was built, it was no accident of biology, an artificial lifeform was consciously created by someone. And, most often, for a purpose. So if you were built/born for a specific purpose, how does that sit with you? How do you react to what you were intended, given life, to accomplish? You can get this with non-artificial lifeforms as well, people have children for very specific purposes all the time, but barring settings with genetic engineering or similar concepts, there’s still some luck of the draw in how such a child might turn out. But robots, warforged, are purpose built. Your body, your form, was crafted to spec. The evidence of your purpose is written onto your body. How do you react to that? And is there more for you outside of it?

So some questions to ask when building a warforged character: What were they designed for? How does that design show in their physical form? Are they aware of what they were built for? If so, how do they react to that knowledge? Did they obey their design and fill the role set out for them? For how long? Do they still? Or have they found a new purpose for themselves? If so, did they have to fight for it? How do they feel about their creator(s)? Do they know their creator? Were they mass produced or personally crafted? Do they have feelings about that distinction? Are things such as them common in the setting? How do they feel about that? Does the setting have a position re artificial life and souls/gods/the afterlife? Do they have beliefs about souls/gods/the afterlife, and how it might apply to them? Do they believe they are a person? Do those around them encourage or despise that belief?

Which, actually, is a point. Warforged as a D&D race were designed for the Eberron setting, and I don’t actually play that setting? Or I haven’t so far, anyway. So when I’m talking about warforged, I’m leaving out a lot of the setting-specific lore for them, like how old they are, the war they were built for, the Eberron-specific backstory of House Cannith and the Last War. Though most/all of these questions will still apply in Eberron, you just have some premade answers for some of them. But pulling warforged outside of Eberron, you are going to have to work with your group/DM to figure out how artificial lifeforms fit in and are viewed in the setting you’re playing.

If you mean how would I rewrite them within Eberron, I don’t necessarily have an answer, as I haven’t read too much into the setting. My general view on most settings/lore is to just tweak things if you have themes you want to explore on a character. For example, if you wanted to ignore that most Eberron warforged have a sexless form and therefore a more abstract concept of gender, in order to explore a warforged that was purpose built to appear as a certain sex, so long as everyone else you’re playing with is okay with that, I’d say go for it. Or if you wanted to explore a warforged that was much, much older than the 30-odd years since the Last War, then maybe House Cannith got their ideas from somewhere, an ancient cache of technology, and you are evidence of that and that puts you in a very, very dangerous position. Talk with your group/DM and find out what’s possible.

And mechanically, they’re fine. I like what they have. I do specifically enjoy Specialised Design, that they get one skill and one tool proficiency built in, because it plays back into that theme I enjoy of your body being built for a purpose. A warforged with proficiency in history and calligraphy tools was designed for a very different purpose than a warforged with proficiency in stealth and thieves tools. It’s such a nice little detail to throw in and built some character around. Were you built as an infiltrator droid (anyone seen The Zeta Project?), or as an elegant automata for a king to show off at court? I know a lot of people use that free skill and tool proficiency to tailor to their class, but I really enjoy stopping to think and use it to show what they were originally built for. Which may or may not match well with what they’re doing now. Maybe you have a dissonant skill/tool, because you fully rejected what you were designed for and sought your own path, but the original design can never be fully overwritten, and your hands still remember what they were made to do. It’s a nice little feature to build some character concepts around (and, yes, you can never go wrong with a free skill/tool).

So, um. Does any of that help? Heh.

[doyouevermakeasound]

Whumptober Day Four: "I see the danger, it is written their in your eyes."

TW: torture mention, interrogation, death

Being the one that people turned to for all of your afterlife needs got a little boring sometimes.  Necromancy was a dying art (No pun intended) and those who practiced, such as whumpee, got asked for consultations.  A lot of consultations.  You would be shocked at the amount of guilt people carry after a loved one dies.  Occasionally they would get something different, someone wanting the last word in an argument or wanting to know where something was stashed.  That led to some awkward encounters.  

Whumpee entered their office and flicked on the light.  Three people were there to meet them.  “You didn’t have to wait with the lights off.  You can spare the dramatics.”  Whumpee chuckled as they took off their jacket and hung it on the coat rack next to the door.

The person sitting in the chair set whumpee’s nerves on fire but that was par for the course with the clientele that walked in.  The person shrugged, “I like keeping an element of surprise.”

Whumpee walked to the other side of the desk, sizing up the two bodyguards that flanked the person in the chair.  “Fair enough, how can I help you?”

The person leaned forward, meeting whumpee’s eyes.  “I need your utmost discretion.  Nothing we speak about leaves this room.  Capisce?”

“I understand.  Confidentiality is one of the things that I pride myself on.  What can I help you with?”

The person in the chair held out a hand and the bodyguard to the right handed them a manila envelope.  “I would like to make this clear.  I will know if you talk about this.  Before I show you what’s in the envelope I need you to understand that I hold a lot of power in this town.”

Whumpee didn’t care for thinly veiled threats but it wasn’t the first time someone had waltzed into their office like this.  They always charged extra the more threats sent their way anyways.  “Yes, I can see that.  What do you need?”

They unclasped the envelope and pulled out a photo.  The body was a mess.  The person’s face was busted beyond repair, burns, cuts, and stab wounds laced the majority of the bodies skin.  Whumpee subconsciously held their breath but forced themselves to release it.  They met the stranger’s eyes.  “Interrogation gone wrong?”  They tried to maintain a jovial tone.

“I have some questions that they still need to answer for me.”  

Whumpee tried to read the stranger and when they came up short they entered into their usual spiel.  “If you’ve got the body still and you didn’t move it, that makes my job easier.  If you’ve already disposed of it, blood or other artifacts can help.  If you’ve just got the photo, it’ll be difficult but not necessarily impossible only if I can go where the interrogation took place.  Depending on the ghost, they fight like hell to stay away from me but it should be doable.”  They handed the picture back to the stranger.  “I do have to say, if this person didn’t want to talk while they were alive, what makes you think that they’ll talk after they’ve died?”

“From what I’ve heard, sometimes a necromancer can be more persuasive than someone with tools while that person was alive.”

They shrugged, “That’s where the whole ‘the ghost sometimes fights like hell’ comes in.’ I can do what you need but I need to get some supplies first.  Do you have the body?”

The stranger nodded, “We haven’t even mopped up the blood.  You were the first stop when we got a little carried away.”

That was a little extreme for getting carried away, thought whumpee.  “Address?”

“I would prefer I leave one of my guards here with you to escort you to the place once you’re ready.”  They nodded towards the bodyguard on their left, “I don’t want you to be able to find the place again if you decide to cross me.  Of course, if you cross me, you can expect to look like that poor fool in the photograph.”

Whumpee put their hand up in defense.  This person definitely thought that they were the first to threaten them.  “You’re not the first person who requested that.  It’ll cost you extra but I will go along with your requirements.”

The stranger stood, “I just want to be clear that I’m not someone to double cross.”

“I see the danger, it’s written there in your eyes.”  The jovial tone slipped from whumpee’s voice.  

The stranger chuckled, “Good, then you know not to cross me.  How does fifty thousand sound?  You know, some extra for your… discretion.”

Whumpee extended a hand across the table.  “Done.”

[danganronpa-21]

Just Leave A Comment Fest July 2023 Results

Alas, such a beautiful comment fest has come to an end once more! My total this time was 22. It’s a little less than last time and I was hoping to shoot for 30, but at the risk of sounding like I’m going against the “no excuses just results” motto… between a job working with kids and a case of aggressive sniffles, I’m still pretty pleased with what I managed to do. I’ll just try and keep up the momentum for afterwards!

So, without further ado, here’s my Danganronpa results for Just Leave A Comment Fest! If you want the Fire Emblem ones, you can find them over here!

“A Misplaced Blame” by shinobutogaminumber1fan: This one is a one-shot centred around Byakuya and his sister, Shinobu. While their relationship is almost strictly professional to most, with Shinobu practically worshipping the ground her brother walks on, this fic shows a more human side to things. Byakuya is strict with her, but shows that he really does care, and I think that it’s a very well put together assessment of his character. His attempts to reconcile with Shinobu after mistreating her are awkward but earnest, and read very well because of that. I think anyone looking for a warmer characterization of Byakuya should definitely pick this one up, because it nails it.

“Boredom, Blood, and Belief” by Hipster71elmWeebTrash: A one-shot about Hajime and Izuru, confronting Izuru’s struggle to be comfortable with himself. He will never be able to live in boredom, too unsatisfied, but when he discovers the records left behind by Hajime Hinata… he cannot understand why it feels so… different, either. I’ve never been as big on Izuru as I have other characters, but I really liked this exploration. Getting to hear Hajime’s sincere thoughts towards what he’s trying to be, and in comparison, Izuru’s reflections on whether this choice was the right one… it’s all deeply thought provoking.

“Kyoko’s Choice” by May0Cat: Set in DR3 as Kyoko is making her choice to come back, this one has an afterlife approach of Sakura offering Kyoko a chance to go back, or to stay with her dead friends and family. Choosing Sakura to be Kyoko’s guide I feel was such a great idea, because the aura of calm she gives off truly makes it feel like she doesn’t mind no matter what Kyoko does. And of course, for Kyoko herself, you find that you really feel the warmth of her love here. She’s not necessarily any more expressive, but her words and her choices are what make it so easy to feel it. You know that though she loves both, she’s making a choice that will satisfy them all. The whole one-shot was incredibly well thought out, and quite enjoyable!

“Game Over” by snomberry: What would’ve happened if Chiaki had been apart of the Student Council Killing Game in DR3? The answer is, a very sad and messed up turn of events! However, if that’s your jam, then this story does it perfectly. Chiaki’s desperation to stop the fighting, even at the risk of being taken out herself, makes the story quite disturbing. It doesn’t go too heavy on the gore, but when it gets there, it isn’t shy either. It is every bit as painful as the original episode itself, with the added stab of Chiaki being lost there.

“Rushed Vessel” by Princess_Piggles: Have you ever wanted a Sondam one-shot where Gundham is trans and comes out to Sonia in the most Gundham-way possible? Well, this offer delivered on this! It’s a short and sweet story, complete with crisp characterization and very respectful portrayals of being trans masculine. I loved getting to see how Gundham brought up his identity, and how Sonia reacted so cheerfully and happily — to the point of being ready to help! This one is just chicken soup for the soul, and I am delightfully taking in spoonfuls.

“Kazukibou: For My Daughter, a Citrus Tachibana” by @capnii: A fankid long fic about Mei Asahina, once Mei Tachibana. The adoptive daughter of Aoi Asahina, Mei has had lots of time to come to terms with her father’s death. However, there are many facets to Mei’s history of adoption and loss, and she will come to find that not all of them are as straightforward as they might seem at a glance. I have the benefit of being a friend of the author, and I can tell you right now, this one is going to be good. Capnii is an expert at writing good high school stories with that classic DR flair, and from what we’ve discussed, this one is going to be a reflective and thoughtful story on Mei’s experience that I think will stand out to a lot of people.

“The Meaning of Love” by plutodeservesbetter: Chiaki/Mikan is one of those pairings that I think is just sugary sweet, and this fic confronts many of the things I love about it. Chiaki is so gentle with Mikan, and Mikan so determined to make Chiaki happy, and you can tell that each of them are giving all of their hearts to the relationship. You can so obviously see how much they care each other, and understand why they make such a lovely couple. It’s a very warm piece of fiction, and definitely something I would recommend to a Nanamiki fan!

“You’re so gorgeous (it actually hurts)” by daughter_of_aphrodite: For all of my Naegiri fans, boy, have I got a one-shot for you. This one features Kyoko taking care of a drunk Makoto, where he is able to share some of his feelings with her more openly. This one has characterizations that are quite genuine, with the affection between the couple (both sober and drunk) seeming so natural that you can’t help but be drawn into it. I love how the author didn’t shy away from Kyoko’s bluntness, but also endeavoured to make drunk Makoto the perfect blend of sweet but clever. They’re a new-to-Danganronpa author, so I would definitely recommend sending some love their way if you choose to read this one. The response they gave me made my heart so happy.

“Boredom.” by kinjo-drabbles (tsurugikinjo): A drabble, yet another centred around Izuru! This one is mostly about his relationship to his boredom and to Junko. Like any good drabble, each sentence is well chosen, and there are a good handful of them make an impact on the reader. My personal favourite was “he doesn’t understand how someone could willingly choose this”, because god, it hits you right where it hurts. It is just so poignant and plays all the right notes to get you feeling what the author wants you to feel.

“Tomorrow, We Have a Chance to Bloom” by KibaSniper: A post-DR3 UDG one-shot, this one has to be one of my favourite Danganronpa stories I’ve read, ever. After Monaca’s departure, her craft crashes in the forest and she is reunited with Komaru, still bored of hope and despair. Trying to escort her back to Future Foundation, Komaru tries to show her that the only reason she ever became anything bad was because she wasn’t loved as she deserved to be. The discussion of this, coupled with the messages about how grey forgiveness is in this circumstance, make this story impeccable. The note it leaves on is hopeful, and it really makes you care about the change that Monaca might be making. Even if she was awful to many, she too was just a little girl who wanted to be loved. Whether or not she deserves a second chance doesn’t matter, this story acknowledges that she will be getting one anyway — so what does she want to do with it?

[brushstrokesapocalyptic]

it’s time for the “overanalyzing one-off lines” show!

so the very first thing magnus says when he sees pit in chapter 2 of kid icarus: uprising is as follows:

“Well, I didn’t expect to see an angel here. Hope this doesn’t mean I’ve kicked the bucket.”

now, i’m not sure if you’re aware, but that’s a really weird thing for someone to say, and it’s even more weird that no one comments on it. pit and palutena go on talking about unrelated things, as if that’s a totally normal and expected thing for magnus to say.

now, if you’re like me, you probably also didn’t really react to this line the first few times you saw it. it’s the second chapter, kiu has a lot of slightly-odd lines which turn out to be foreshadowing. me, personally? my first thought was “oh, i guess angels are probably associated with escorting the dead to the afterlife,“ and then i moved on.

they’re not, though. that’s what reapers do. and there’s no way humans have these two races mixed up. just fucking look at them.

do they look anything alike to you??? no. they don’t. which raises the question of why, exactly, magnus said that.

now, we don’t know a lot about angels as a whole. pit (and by extension dark pit) is emphatically not the gold standard of angeldom. we can assume he looks fairly ordinary for an angel, seeing as no one has trouble identifying him as such. beyond that, though, a lot of what we know about angels comes from what pit isn’t. for starters, he can’t fly. and there’s something else, too, but i’ll get to that later.

before that, though, i’m gonna go through the various unsubstantiated comments made by people with a dubious level of authority on the subject. (incidentally, i sourced these screenshots from the wiki— much more convenient than trying to dig through youtube for every single random conversation.)

without any further ado! let’s get into it!

Angels as Messengers

Gaol: Aw, Palutena’s little messenger boy. And Magnus, it’s always a pleasure. (src)

in the specific context of overanalyzing magnus’s first line, this is an important sentence to pick out. magnus and gaol are both humans, both with presumably a fairly similar history as mercenaries up until gaol got stuffed in a suit of armor. but while magnus makes a weird comment about death, gaol calls pit a messenger.

and pit agrees with her!

Viridi: I wish I had an angel to do my bidding. It’s like having an intern.

Pit: I’m not an intern. I’m a messenger of the gods!

Viridi: Poor Pit. Don't you know that the definition of angel is "errand spirit"? (src)

this particular conversation is the most insight we get into angels as a whole, i think. viridi thinks of angels as like divine interns, there to do little tasks for gods, and palutena doesn’t exactly disagree with her. pit says they’re specifically messengers, which lines up with biblical mythology. i could see the traditional role of angels in the world of KI being exactly that, showing up to tell the humans what the gods have to say because the gods themselves are too busy being petty jerks to do it themselves.

The Angel’s Code of Conduct

Magnus: You go in fully dressed? Don't you at least want to change into a...swimming tunic or something?

Pit: Oh, no no no! The angel's code of conduct says that we must always be ready for duty.

Magnus: I guess you wouldn't be an angel if you didn't do things by the book. (src)

Pit: Hey! You know the angel's code of conduct! I need to be prepared at all times! (src)

another random little thing is the angel’s code of conduct. without a larger sample size, we can’t know if it’s a real thing or just an excuse to save on laundry, but apparently it’s against the rules to not be on call at all times. in pit’s case, the duty he has to be ready for is doing palutena’s dirty work, but it can easily mean just about anything— including, of course, being a messenger.

No Warrior

Chariot Master: But you are no warrior, angel. Tell me, why do you fight?

Pit: I fight for Lady Palutena. And I fight for the people under her protection!

Chariot Master: That's not reason enough for an angel. (src)

remember how i said there was something else weird about pit? the chariot master seems to think angels aren’t very prone to battle— or perhaps even that they’re actively opposed to it. this lines up well with the idea that they’re supposed to be messengers, peaceful go-betweens for gods and mortals. this does not line up well with pit, the adorable weapon of mass destruction.

and it also does absolutely nothing to explain the question driving the whole existence of this post.

you know what does kinda lean towards an explanation?

No Other Angels

Pit: Do all gods have their own angels, like you have me?

Palutena: No, I don't think that's necessarily the case. (src)

i said before that the Intern Pit conversation had the most illuminating information on angels. this is what i was actually referring to. on its own, it’s pretty innocuous, but it’s just as weird as the magnus line. shouldn’t pit know about other angels, seeing as he is one himself? but he doesn’t know if there are other angels.

the only angels we ever see are him and his clone. no one ever directly references the existence of other angels, they only make general statements about what angels as a whole are like— statements which clearly don’t apply to pit, meaning they’re not just extrapolating based on the one angel that definitely does exist.

the one time someone does comment on the hypothetical existence of other angels, palutena gives a vague answer to the tune of “no,” the topic is changed, and no one brings it up again.

let’s go over everything i’ve established about angels up to this point. they can fly, they’re peaceful messengers of the gods, and pit is the only one that seems to exist as of the start of KIU.

it should be pretty obvious at this point what answer i’m dancing around, if it wasn’t obvious from the start. pit is the only angel around because all the other ones are dead. the reason why magnus said what he did is that his thought process went something like this:

See an angel.

Think “Aren’t angels extinct? Is that a ghost? Am I a ghost? I sure hope not.“

Make a quip about that.

Move on with his life, because he isn’t dead and evidently neither is this guy.

i’m not gonna pretend i went into this post with the intent of any other conclusion to that mystery. anyone who’s bothered glancing over a plot summary for the original kid icarus can draw that conclusion. it’s certainly what i did, reinforced by fics by people who had the same thought!

the truth, however, is that this was all a trick to get you to read my analysis of the theoretical nature of angels as a race. now that you’re invested, i’m going to dramatically throw aside my cape and reveal my TRUE FORM: telling people that fandom consensus is wrong, and my ideas are cooler and better than everyone else’s and you should all throw roses at my feet and bow before your king.

(or just, y’know, take it as the subjective analysis that it is. whatever floats your boat.)

Hot Takes

the original kid icarus does not actually tell you about angels going extinct. here’s the wiki article with the full text of the backstory, just for convenience, so you know what i’m on about for the rest of this post.

so, the part of the story that i think gets misinterpreted is this part about palutena’s army.

Medusa led a surprise attack on Palutena's army which could barely fend off the attack. Palutena's army suffered major losses and was heavily defeated in the final battle.

specifically, i think a lot of people interpret said army as having been made up at least partly of angels. sure, in the actual game it consists entirely of centurions, but you have to take old NES games with a grain of salt. i know i don’t buy for a second that pit was part of palutena’s guard before the original game (he was just too goddamn young), there’s nothing wrong with reinterpreting things.

recall everything i established about angels already, though. this is the hot official lore, from the game everyone knows and loves. angels are messengers, and if the chariot master is to be believed, never warriors. pit is an outlier. palutena’s army consists of centurions, not angels. if medusa wiped them out, it wasn’t because they were fighting for palutena.

(and honestly, i don’t think angels are necessarily associated with palutena exclusively. sure, she’s got the wing imagery, and she’s got the one known surviving angel working for her, at least up until pittoo is born. but angels are messengers of the gods, not messengers of palutena. again, pit is an outlier.)

which all brings us to the real question of this post.

what the FUCK happened to all the other angels? why is there only pit? why does magnus act surprised to see a messenger of the gods, and make a quip about being dead, if not because angels are otherwise extinct?! WHO KILLED THEM, AND WHY?!

thus concludes the “over analyzing one-off lines“ show. see you next, uh, maybe at some point if i feel like it!

(also another thought i had but couldn’t find room to fit it in properly: the gods don’t really act like angels are all extinct, but i feel like that can be explained through the sheer scale of a god’s lifespan. if we assume they were wiped out sometime around the original kid icarus (even if not as palutena’s army) then that’s a whole twenty-five years. that’s a long time for us humans, but for a god, that might as well be last tuesday. “yeah, i know what angels are like. sure wish i could have one. too bad palutena’s got a monopoly on the one single angel that medusa didn’t manage to wreck.”)

[flyingfish1]

was ‘healing & wholeness through death’ always Dabb’s intention

Content note: discussions of suicide attempts, including quotes from the show on that topic; and the concept of death as the solution to problems

*

Mary should have been the blaring warning siren and I didn’t listen.

Castiel: I'm looking for someone. Dumah: Mary Winchester? If that's why you're here, then you should leave now. Castiel: Why? There may be a way to bring her back. Dumah: Why would you want to do that? … She is at peace. You know, she died painlessly. Instantly. Completely. She's in Heaven, a special Heaven. Mary Winchester is complete. You and the Winchesters may not be. But she is. -14x18 (Robert Berens) -transcript from superwiki

“Completeness” in death. Mary, now dead and in Heaven, is “complete,” says the story. And, in this moment in s14, the Winchesters and Cas are apparently not “complete.”

Mary, who initially didn’t want to be alive:

Mary: I didn’t ask to come back here. Billie: No, you didn’t. And you hate it. The look in your eyes – I’ve seen it before. It’s a dead man’s look. Eyes that say no matter where you go, what you do, it feels like this world doesn’t fit anymore. Like you’re all alone. Dean: Well, she’s not alone. Billie: Tell me I’m wrong. [Mary doesn’t answer] I’m not here to hurt you. I’m here to offer you mercy. One way ticket upstairs. Away from all of this. [Mary hesitates] Mary: How would it work? Sam: Mom! Billie: Reapers don’t kill people. Rules. Mary: Well, then -- [She looks at Sam and Dean, then turns to look back at Billie] Then I guess you’re just gonna have to wait. -12x06 (Steve Yockey)

Mary, who struggled so hard with being pulled out of her heavenly paradise and given her life back. Mary, who struggled to get over the loss of her husband, and the loss of her previous life, and the loss of the two little children she had wanted to raise.

Mary, who held a gun to her own head more than once. Mary, who, at one point, sincerely begged Ketch to kill her:

MARY LEANS UP AGAINST MR. KETCH, GRABS HIS GUN AND BACKS AWAY. MR. KETCH: Mary MARY COCKS THE GUN AND PUTS BELOW HER CHIN. MR. KETCH: No. MR. KETCH GRABS FOR THE GUN AND MANAGES TO KNOCK IT AWAY AS IT GOES OFF. MR. KETCH: Ow! Ah! MARY: Then you do it! Kill me. All my life, all I ever had, other than my family, was my will. MARY BEGINS TO CRY. MARY: And it's going away. I'm – I'm putting people in danger. I'm putting my sons in danger. You have to – MARY DROPS TO HER KNEES. MARY: Please. For God's sake, kill me. MR. KETCH: Mary. MARY: Just do it! MR. KETCH: Mary, listen to me. It won't be long now. This will all be over. I promise. MARY: No. MR. KETCH: I promise. MARY: No. KETCH WALKS OUT OF THE ROOM AND LEAVES MARY IN DESPAIR. -12x21 (Buckleming) -transcript from superwiki

Mary later rejected death, although looking back at it now, in retrospect, she rejected it not quite so much on the basis of “living is good, actually,” but more on the basis that Heaven isn’t good enough (… not yet, as it turns out):

[Kevin tears open his shirt revealing a sigil carved into his chest.] … KEVIN: Michael says… that when I get to Heaven-- when he lets me into Heaven-- I'll get to see my mom again. MARY: I've been to Heaven, and what's there… it's just memories. Nothing's real. -13x20 (Glynn) -transcript from superwiki

(I was so happy for her when I first watched this, because I thought it was a sign that she would be turning the corner and getting the opportunity to heal in life, and on a long-term basis. But………….)

Mary then did find strength and purpose in her life and her job – hunting, helping Jack, helping the AU World hunters. She came back to Sam and Dean’s world and forged stronger relationships with them. She started a romantic relationship with AU Bobby, although it seems that she had her troubles with it:

MARY: Bobby's not open like your dad. SAM: Wait. Like my dad? MARY: Okay. At least he's not like your dad was when I knew him. SAM: Right. MARY: Bobby's got walls, big ones. I just don't know if I can do that if I even ever put myself out there again. -14X05 (Glynn)

Her one true love, ultimately, was John. And then, in 14x13, she was hit hard by the loss of John just after getting him back again:

SAM: Uh, the, uh… the lore is pretty clear. We destroy the pearl, and it unwinds all of this. Dad goes back… and so will everything else. MARY: And he won’t remember anything? [SAM shakes his head.] SAM: No. [MARY nods. She shakes her head, crying.] MARY: Sam, I can’t.

*

[JOHN and MARY take each other’s hand.] MARY: I hate this. JOHN: So do I. … My girl. [MARY smiles through tears.] JOHN: I miss you so damn much. MARY: Me too. -14x13 (Dabb and Glynn) -transcript from superwiki

Mary’s next episode, 14x17, is her death.

(In between, we have 14x14, with Cas’ speech to Jack about appreciating the time they have with their short-lived human loved ones, and carrying on when they are gone. At the time I suppose I thought it was foreshadowing for Mary, but in retrospect it’s broader than that, isn’t it.)

So, at the point of Mary’s death, she’s not actively suicidal anymore. But her losses have been recently emphasized, and so has her pain. Her husband is dead.

And then comes 14x18 and her “completeness.” We find out in 14x19 that she and John are sharing a Heaven. She is at peace, we hear, because she is with her husband in the afterlife.

All in all, in retrospect, this concept of “completeness in death” – of having death be your reward and your happy ending – pervaded the Dabb era from the start. We learned as early as 12x19 that Jack would build a “paradise,” and now we know what that paradise is: this remodeled Heaven in which Dean can, apparently, have what wanted but couldn’t have on earth and in life. Dean, who -- though he wasn’t actively suicidal in 15x20 -- has also struggled mightily with wanting to be dead, and who has been suicidal in the past.

It results in this concept that, as long as you’re not actively suicidal (anymore!), dying at the age of 41 (or approx. 32, in Mary’s case) is fine. This concept that it’s good, actually, because then you’ll be whole and at peace.

I find this deeply disturbing. I know that the ‘reunited in Heaven’ concept works for some (and I think I wouldn’t even necessarily have a problem with it if it were explicitly shown to be happening at the end of a long and happy life). But as presented in canon, involving the characters that it does, with their lives being cut short the way they are, I do find it deeply disturbing. Personally, I’m finding myself (emotionally speaking) backing away from the entire Dabb era with my hackles raised.

And I feel stupid for not seeing it. Or, truthfully, for seeing some of it and then convincing myself that it wasn’t there, that I was wrong, that TPTB couldn’t be leading the story in that direction. For, I guess, buying into what I read as the Carver-era ‘retirement’/‘living a long and happy life’ themes so hard that I didn’t let myself focus on anything else. For always being half-afraid that TPTB would re-fridge Mary, so that when they finally did it I just went, “Well, that’s that :(” without examining the themes around it closely enough.

For not taking all the warning bells seriously.

I want to make sure to say this clearly: It is absolutely possible to heal in life. Friends, and loved ones, and old relationships and new relationships, and love, and loyalty, and peace, all exist in life, able to be found and created. Healing exists in life. Contentment. New experiences and excitement and joy and beauty. Nobody’s too traumatized for that. Dean and Mary deserved that. Everybody does.

[sepublic]

Kraid!

KKKKKRRRRAAAAAIIIIIIDDDDD

I was trying to avoid as much of Metroid Dread as possible to be surprised... But then I learned KRAID is back, in glorious HD as part of a mainline game and...

Oh, he’s beautiful!

Seriously, I’ve always wanted to see more of Kraid! Dude was one of the OG Space Pirates alongside Mother Brain and Ridley, who are present throughout the series; And as someone who is apparently Ridley’s Brother-in-Arms, I’m just really curious on what he could be like?

I doubt we’ll get much if anything in terms of personality, but that’s how Metroid games work anyway! Hopefully we get more lore on Kraid, how is he still alive? Does he have regenerative abilities, is he just really incredibly durable? An X-parasite imitation? Fake Kraid has grown up and this is Sclayd? Did the Chozo clone him, maybe even somehow resurrect him from a dead body, or even the afterlife considering their borderline mystical abilities???

Either way, that’s clever of the designers to have Kraid be restrained, as a meta explanation as to why he doesn’t just charge forward- Thus allowing the developers to start off with a traditional take on the Kraid fight... But since he manages to break an arm free in the trailer, the fight might progress and get more deadly, as Kraid becomes more free.

His neck brace will probably be the last to go, to show a sort of natural transition from the traditional style of Kraid fights, to a more modernized take and I am all FOR it! Everyone’s wondering if Ridley will return, but Kraid alone would MORE than make up for his absence, especially since Ridley is already so prevalent while Kraid has only gotten bread crumbs and the Brinstar Depths stage in recent years!

This is like a dream come true... And obviously Kraid is set up to fight Samus, but it’d be kind of neat to see an arc where him and Samus recognize a mutual enemy in the Chozo, and work with each other over it? Probably not, but I feel this would be more plausible than Samus and Ridley working together; A fun thought exercise I’d always entertained, but there really isn’t that personal vitriol between Samus and Kraid.

...I mean, there COULD be if Kraid takes Ridley’s death personally, but who knows, he might hold off on revenge just long enough for a practical escape! Regardless, I utterly adore just how gnarly and twisted this guy looks, it reminds me of Ridley’s Smash Ultimate renders that really modernize his look, breathe a new and alien life to it while still being the same! And the added, slimy body horror, borderline insectoid, like Smash Ridley!

But yes, I appreciate Metroid Dread taking the opportunity to be new, instead of trying to cater to the mainstream audience as an official return to pull them back, especially since we already had Samus Returns do that, especially with Proteus Ridley being thrown in! And with how Proteus was by far the best Ridley fight in the series, I can’t WAIT to see how Mercury Steam gives a new action to a Kraid boss battle!

And it looks like there might be a passageway behind Kraid that he’s guarding... Kind of like his previous appearances, I love Kraid being a giant guard dog- His girth and weight alone makes him an impenetrable wall! Plus he gives immovable object vibes, VS Ridley as an Unstoppable Force.

Ridley moves fast and aggressively leads the charge, while Kraid is less mobile, can’t even fit through most passageways; But holds down the fort and line of defense, tanking damage and shrugging it off compared to someone who heals from it!

Seriously, this is great seeing this under appreciated Space Pirate represented! I’ve always been salty about Meta Kraid being left out of Metroid Prime... And Kraid’s got a distinct identity of his own as one of the biggest bosses in the entire series by a long shot!

His big, colossal, green and chunky frame, that brutishness to Kraid, the size and brawn- It’s a nice contrast and foil to Ridley’ who is memetically huge in general, but from a relative standpoint averagely-sized as a boss, and MUCH scrawnier than the Awakened Behemoth; But he makes up for it wit speed and agility, flight, etc.!

Plus the concept of taking on a full-on Kaiju of the series, Metroid’s Godzilla... I always felt like there was a wasted potential to Kraid and how he stood out as a counterpart to Ridley’ more of the lumbering mountain to scale compared to the acrobatic Cunning God of Death! His Kaiju size, the way the ground could easily tremble from each footstep like Jurassic Park...

If Ridley is a Xenomorph, make Kraid into Godzilla and Rexy and every giant monster whose sheer scale inspires a horror based in awe, one that is huge and grandiose and demands attention and seizes all of it, gloriously basking in full view, in contrast to the more stealthy and subtle Ridley!

They’re both reptilian Space Pirates who debuted with the franchise, serve Mother Brain alongside one another as the two guardians to Tourian. And just like Ridley taking one of the recurring boss themes from Super Metroid and adopting it as HIS theme, Kraid seems to have done the same by Zero Mission!

Plus, Brinstar Depths, AKA Kraid’s Lair, is SUCH a metal soundtrack! It doesn’t necessarily apply to Kraid himself, but I feel like there’s an enigmatic personality hinted with the eerie, melodic tune of this theme... So as someone who’s tried to write him, mostly in my head;

What kind of person is Kraid? What archetypes and roles would he fit? As a more casual type of arch-nemesis, compared to the personal intensity of Ridley? A dumb brute, or smart in his own way? What personality and vibes would make Kraid’s Lair fit as a theme for him?

At the very least, I wonder if we’ll get Space Pirate lore, maybe even origins as to Kraid and Ridley’s species? They’re both huge dragons who took over Zebes... Could there be a connection between Ridley’s species and the Chozo? Will we get a bit of sympathy for Kraid, seeing him captured like an animal by the Chozo, perhaps to test experiments upon and clone?

Will Dread encapsulate the realization of just how much of a bigger scope villain the True Chozo are, experimenting on Kraid the way the Galactic Federation did with Ridley’s clone, another parallel between them? Will we explore the dark past of the Chozo, and a potential tragic look into Kraid’s species- So Samus has a better understanding of how her people have been terrible in many ways, even if that doesn’t at all justify Kraid the person’s actions?

Just... Imagine a storyline where Samus realizes that Kraid was made by the Chozo, or his species was, or they were genetically augmented or massacred, or something like that. Just a twisted moment of realization that explains but doesn’t justify. Which could lead to Samus and Kraid teaming up for a prison breakout at a pivotal moment, Kraid’s girth would make him a helpful ally.

Perhaps Samus could weaponize Kraid in the background to take the brunt of the True Chozo’s attacks, while she takes on the leader? Could he help with environmental terrain, blind to the background as a colossal feature of the environment, a kaiju briefly on your side?

Could we get a Kraid fight where he attacks from the background, instead of to the right? Will he ultimately die helping Samus- More for his own gain and revenge, but still? Maybe even leading to a reluctant salute from Samus as she recognizes them both as people captured, as experimented upon by the Chozo? Apologies for all of the fanon conjecture, my mind is racing...!

I think there’s SO much potential with Kraid and seeing him full, unadulterated HD glory... It’s glorious. It’s magnificent! This is a dream come true, and I hope Kraid finally starts to get the recognition he deserves! Even if he’s just A boss fight, I’m already sated and content here- And I can only imagine the new wave of fan content that will spawn for Kraid, as he’s recognized a defining moment of Dread!

Plus, I’d love to see people characterize and give lore to Kraid... All in all I am LIVING and in triumph here!!! I know I keep using this meme but

Literally this alone, just these shots... Are ALL I really want and need, in the end! Bless you Mercury Steam for this food, for breathing new life into this franchise while renovating what really needs it! I don’t even care if Kraid’s return is never really explained, I’m incredibly happy here!

This new design... It just FITS and works as a new, evergreen design for Kraid honestly! Compared to Ridley who is a lot more varied and arguably inconsistent, even with his Smash render... THIS is the new and definitive Kraid for me, now! I am having the time of my LIFE here!

Ridley the Cunning God has cheated death... is Kraid the Behemoth has reawakened!

(With the idea of Prime Kraid being reused for Metroid Prime 4... I’m wondering if we’ll begin to see an all new Kraid renaissance? 👀 More frequent content as Nintendo starts giving him and more appearances and attention, including in other media and advertising, alongside Ridley???)

[milgrammer]

[ENG] Molech Voice Drama

Es: [footsteps]

Shido: Hm?

Es: Sorry to have kept you waiting. [footsteps] Prisoner number 5, Shido. 

Shido: No need to. Thank you for all your hard work, Es.

Es: Now then, Shido. Let’s begin the interrogation.

Shido: Very well. Please go ahead.

Es: [hesitates] Ok. Let’s see... Milgram exists to reveal the sins of you, prisoners, and to hand down the appropriate judgement. So, for that reason, talk to me for a bit. 

Shido: Understood. Please take good care of me from now on.

Es: [pauses] Even if this is referred to as an interrogation, at this moment in time, I don’t plan on using violence. In addition to that, any falsehood or silence from you will be acknowledged.

Shido: I see. I might refrain from voicing anything I don’t want to say, but I have no intention of lying to you.

Es: Shido, how’s life in Milgram? Do you have any complaints about its environment? Or have any issues arisen from the other prisoners, etc?

Shido: No particular inadequacies really come to mind. And, my fellow prisoners haven't particularly caused any issues either. Es, I wonder if this is the fruit of all the governing you do? It’s remarkable.

Es: Not really. [hesitates] Hold on a second, Shido. 

Shido: Yes? What is it?

Es: This is… I know it’s me who’s getting things mixed up here, but…  In comparison to all the interrogations thus far, this one has been progressing far too smoothly; it feels somewhat unsettling. 

Shido: I’m not sure what to say to that... 

Es: Hm. [footsteps] Shido, do you seriously not have any reservations about Milgram? 

Shido: Well, let’s see. I mean, without a doubt, it’s clearly a strange place. Its architectural style and the written script it uses are things I’ve never seen before either. If you were to say I was having a dream or a vision, then that would make more sense to me. 

Es: Hm.

Shido: But, all things considered, I’m still very much conscious. My pulse rate is within its normal range. And, I can’t find any symptoms to suggest that I’m hallucinating either. So, I don't exactly find that idea to be very convincing.

Es: Oh?

Shido: Other than that... If this is the afterlife, then this place must be hell. But, if I set that idea aside, then… This is just real life. I, myself, am in normal condition; it’s where I am which is unusual. I may not know the reason behind this place or how it works, but even if I tried to escape from the reality of it, nothing would really change, right?

Es: You sure are composed, aren’t you? 

Shido: That’s just my personality. I just simply don’t think bad of it—this place, I mean. 

Es: You mean, Milgram?

Shido: Yeah, this place will put me to death. 

Es: What?

Shido: I might not get a golden opportunity like this again, so I’ll get straight to the point. Es… You decide how the prisoners will be dealt with, right? 

Es: Yeah. That’s right.

Shido: The death penalty is what I’m hoping for. Thank you in advance. 

Es: I won’t have that. The lot of you can’t decide what your own treatment will be. Only I as the prison guard have the authority to do so.

Shido: Exactly. You as the prison guard have the right to do such a thing, Es, so that’s why I’m asking you for this favour. 

Es: [scratches head, sighs] In regards to your sin, what I’ve gathered so far is that you both regret and have already reflected on your actions. On top of that, you’re also seeking to receive the maximum penalty we have to offer. So, let’s use that information. The idea that I’ll be taking your behaviour into consideration is nothing more than a mere presumption.

Shido: [hesitates]

Es: And, of course, I haven’t thrown away the possibility that you’re only doing this to get on my good side either.

Shido: Hm. I honestly have no idea what you and Milgram are setting out to achieve. You mentioned something about extracting songs and videos from our hearts, and then using them to judge our sins, didn’t you?

Es: Yeah. And, what of it?

Shido: There’s no need for you to go through such a cumbersome process. If you want to hand down the correct punishment for me, then all you have to do is put an end to my life and it'll be over in a blink of an eye.

Es: You’re being annoyingly persistent, Shido! Know your place here. 

Shido: Please listen to me, Es. I’ve killed people. Lots of them as well. It was for such a selfish reason too. I’m a fine specimen of what a genuine murderer ought to be. [footsteps] There’s no reason for you to forgive me. And, I don’t have the desire to be forgiven either.

Es: I really don’t...get you.

Shido: If you don’t put me to death, then neither the people I’ve killed nor their families will be at peace. Don’t you think so too?    

Es: As if that’s my business. I haven’t necessarily sided with your victims and I’m not a family member of theirs either.

Shido: [sighs]

Es: [sighs] Anyway, the only thing I’ll be deciding on is whether or not I forgive you. I don’t even know the details of what punishment will follow after that. 

Shido: Is that so? Es, I suppose you were left in the dark about many things as well just like the rest of us. 

Es: Knowing what happens to the lot of you afterwards might prevent me from making a straightforward decision about whether I should forgive you or not. So, it’s to avoid that from happening. Were you aware of that? 

Shido: Hm… But, this place does smell of the dead though. I’m sure that some sort of death will lie at the end of Milgram.

Es: Smell of the dead? 

Shido: Yes. I can somewhat recognise it from experience… A place which is filled with the smell of the dead, that is. 

Es: Is...that so? Well, either way, Milgram is a three-trial system. It lets me take my time to decide on whether or not I should forgive you. Even if you wish for the opposite, if I decide that you should be forgiven, then it’ll do just that without any hesitation. 

Shido: A three-trial system, right? It’ll take far too long, don’t you think? I’d rather this all be over as soon as possible.

Es: Like I care about what’s convenient for you. Don’t complain about the rules.

Shido: So, if it’s a three-trial system… Then, for example, if you absolutely can’t find it within yourself to forgive me and I don’t lodge an appeal in response, will my treatment be decided on the spot?

Es: That’s the three-trial system according to Japanese law. Milgram’s one is different from that. For the time being, you really should throw away what would be considered common sense there. I mean, if we’re gonna bring up Japan… Due to the abolition of the Prison law, this sort of prison shouldn’t even exist in the first place. (1)

Shido: Wow… 

Es: What is it? You’re going all wide-eyed. 

Shido: Ah, well… I was just thinking about how despite being a child, you’ve really done your research on this.

Es: Hey. [footsteps] You trying to make fun of me, is that it? 

Shido: What? Oh, no. I wasn’t trying to do anything like that.

Es: You were. Something’s been on my mind ever since the very beginning… “Es, this. Es, that.” It’s the belittling way you refer to me…  I’m the prison guard, you know that?

Shido: Oh, I’m completely aware of that. But, you’re still a child in actuality. Coming from me, who’s almost twice the age as you are, I just… 

Es: What is it?

Shido: For a child like you to be entrusted with this sort of role… My heart goes out to you. 

Es: Excuse me?

Shido: I don’t know what circumstances you face while guarding this prison nor the reason as to why you’re doing it, but I’m sure that it must take a toll on you emotionally as well. So, please do your best. [pats head]

Es: [is shook] I see. Oh, I see now. So, that’s how it is. So, that’s how it’s gonna be. [deep breaths]

Shido: Hm? Es?

Es: Don’t you dare… pat my head like that! [kicks]

Shido: [grunts] Please hold on for a second.

Es: Phew, I feel so much better now.

Shido: S-suddenly kicking my shin like that…wasn’t very nice of you.

Es: Shut up! Out of all the prisoners thus far, you’re the one I can’t stand the most. Going all pessimistic like that, running your mouth as if you knew everything, acting as if you’re oh-so mature, and never budging from that composed expression of yours—the nerve of you! On top of that, you even went so far as to pat my head. Do you think I’m your child? Do you?! Don’t fuck with me!

Shido: Didn’t you say that you wouldn’t use violence?

Es: It’s on a case-by-case basis.

Shido: What a thing to say.

Es: Hey, Shido. What the hell do you mean by "I want to die"? Don’t you dare try to insult me with that. Plead for your life with every fibre of your being! Our instinctive desire to stay alive is the very reason why punishments for our sins exist. To Milgram and to me, your very existence is sacrilegious! 

Shido: Es… 

Es: If your shin gets kicked, you’ll feel pain, won’t you? And if it hurts, you’ll cry out, won’t you? You’ll tear up, won’t you? 

Shido: Yeah… 

Es: Well, take that! Even if you boast about wanting to die, the pain you just felt is the exact same thing as your body screaming that it doesn’t want to. 

Shido: [pauses]

Es: While you’re still alive, you should be grabbing life with both hands! Don’t act as if you’re already dead. An adult like that has no right to treat me like a child. It makes my skin crawl. End of discussion!

Shido: I see… If I feel pain, then it’s proof that I want to live?

Es: Hmph!

Shido: [sighs] Well, with that being said, here’s my counterargument to it. It was the nociceptors in my shin which felt that pain. So, it's nothing more than a reaction caused by pain signals being transmitted to my spinal cord and then to my brain. That phenomenon is called nociceptive pain. 

Es: What?

Shido: What I’m saying is… Even if I do want to die, pain is something which will still involuntarily occur. And therefore, you, Es, were making a mistake in your claim.

Es: That's so immature of you. 

Shido: [laughs] It’s payback for kicking my shin like that. But, you know, I think it was an amazing mistake to have made. It was so radiant...to the point where it made me want to turn away. Just as I thought, you truly are a child…but that makes me incredibly happy.

Es: Shido… [mechanical noises] It’s time, huh.

Shido: So, this is what will be “extracting songs”? It sure is intriguing. I wonder what mine will be like. 

Es: Composed no matter what, aren’t you? Is there anything left you'd like to say? 

Shido: Oh, yeah. I don’t know about what the other prisoners may think about Milgram itself, but…  I fully agree with it.

Es: Sure seems that way.

Shido: I’m a fine specimen of what a murderer ought to be. I don’t mind when you hand down your judgement, but if it's possible… Instead of being told by the law that I won’t be forgiven, I wanted a child like you, Es, to tell me that.

Es: What?

Shido: I feel sorry that you had to be given this role. And, I truly apologise for being so insistent about sentencing me to death as well…  But, you’re perfect. You’ll give me the ending I’m most suited for. 

Es: [hesitates] Y-you… What’re you saying? A special request like that is so...

Shido: [laughs] Well, I wonder. I'm just trying to get you to punish me as of now. 

Es: [hesitates] 

Shido: I look forward to you handing down the correct judgment.

Es: You’re making a false presumption there. It’s the fact that it’s my judgment which makes it correct! That’s what Milgram is.

Shido: Then, I look forward to what you deem to be ‘correct’.

Es: Hmph. Say whatever you want.

Shido: Please make sure you don’t forgive me. Okay, Es?

Es: [scoffs] Don’t make me say it over and over again! I don’t give a shit about what you’re hoping for. Prisoner number 5, Shido. Come now. Sing your sins!

「監獄」 [kangoku] were essentially comprised of 「刑務所」 (for those people serving a sentence) and 「拘置所」 (for suspects, those who were awaiting a sentence or those on death row).  They operated under 「監獄法」 (the Prison Law). However, due to abolition of the Prison Law in 2007, those facilities are no longer called 「監獄」, but are now referred to as 「刑事施設」.

[pandoraborn]

Characters: Captain Puffy, Tommyinnit Word count: 1510 words Content: death, ghost!Tommy, mentions of abuse, closure, peace

---

As she wanders the ruins of L’Manburg, Puffy stops at every landmark. Even now, there’s wood smoldering, as if unwilling to put out the flames of destruction Dream had caused. She knows now it was Dream, she can understand more what he’d done behind the scenes when no one else was paying attention.

She’s not sure why she’s here or what she’s looking for. There’s nothing here but a few broken chests with cracked and splintered remains of what Tommy used to own. Puffy could try to salvage anything that’s left, but that would also go against the whole purpose of turning this place into a monument.

She leans against the large tower not too far away. This must be the one Tommy jumped off of before running to Techno’s. It’s easy enough to guess that’s what happened, what with Tubbo rushing back in tears to announce Tommy’s death, before sweeping everything under the rug. God, she can’t imagine how he’s feeling now.

Tears spring to her eyes as he pulls away from the tower. It’s pointless to dwell on everything negative here, it’s pointless to even be here. Puffy knows she’s only here to assuage her own guilt over letting Tommy remain in exile, even though she’d tried her best to help him cope.

“I wouldn’t feel too guilty if I were you.”

Puffy almost wants to chalk that up to a hallucination. She wants to pinch herself and tell herself this is a dream, but when she turns toward the water, the ghostly form of Tommy is sitting there, letting his bare feet dangle.

He looks like he did before exile: a healthy teenager with no wear and tear. He’s sitting, with one leg drawn up to his chest and resting his arms on that knee. In his hands is some of Wilbur’s blue, and Tommy’s got a grin on his face.

Most notable is the lack of grey pigment in his skin. He’s very clearly a ghost, but he doesn’t actually look like one.

“Tommy?” Puffy feels like the air had been knocked out of her. “You’re... you’re here?”

“Yeah, isn’t it weird?” He laughs as he tosses blue at her feet. His eyes are shining a bright blue, brighter than they had been in life. “One minute I’m screaming for Sam to let me out, and the next minute I’m sat here, contemplating everything. I’ve come to the conclusion that it sucks.”

Puffy remains silent as she bends down at the knee, gently grabbing at the blue. Trembling fingers grasp at it as she straightens back up, staring at the small object. The silence drags on for too long, so she opts to sit down next to him.

“Tommy-”

“You know, I never understood why Ghostbur kept throwing blue at everyone,” Tommy interrupts. “I thought it was just something he did, y’know? He was weird like that, but I was just so happy to have him around that I accepted it as one of his many annoying quirks. But now I think I understand more. It’s easy to let things go if you don’t have to think about them. I can just take this shit, fill it with my own shit and trauma and whatever, toss it out and move on. It’s like it’s physically gone.”

“You remember?” Puffy watches him through her peripheral vision. He’s manifesting more...whatever it is, watching as it turns to blue. He hands her another one. “Wilbur didn’t remember.”

“I wanted to remember. I wouldn’t be as awesome if I was some fake happy version of myself, would I?”

She has to admit that he’s right.

“Look, I see it all over your face Puffy. I just wanted to tell you to stop feeling guilty, alright? You didn’t do it. You couldn’t have prevented it.”

Tears fill her vision. “It was my job to protect you. You were a child, Tommy. I should have done more for you.”

“I wouldn’t have let you in, you know. You or Sam or anyone who wanted to help. I was responsible for me, I didn’t want anyone’s pity.” He tosses a blue into the water. Puffy watches it slip below the surface. “It’s why Sam Nook was created. If Sam had tried to help directly I would have pushed him away. You don’t have to feel so guilty.”

“But we do, Tommy. We do feel guilty, we do feel responsible. You might feel like it was just you against the world, but we did care.”

“I know. I’m glad you cared; that was more than enough for me. Sometimes that’s all I want from anyone, is just to know.” He offers her a more gentle grin. It’s so Tommy, but it’s also something far wiser than he should have to be. As if he knows what’s waiting for him on the other side.

“Are you going to be around, like Ghostbur?”

“Nah. I’m not giving that green bastard a chance to toy with me. You know he’s going to, so I’m going to take my L and move on with Wilbur. He’s waiting for me, you know.”

Fresh tears spring to her eyes. The idea that Tommy doesn’t want to stick around feels hollow, but she can understand his logic there, too. “So we’ll never see you again?”

“Puffy.” Tommy sighs as he presses a hand to her shoulder. He uses her as stability while getting to his feet. “Sometimes people don’t come back after death, y’know. Schlatt and Wilbur did, but sometimes they just don’t. I don’t have any unfinished business. Mine was bringing Wilbur back, but since I’m not around anymore, there’s really no point to it, is there?”

“Yeah, but your friends-”

“-don’t need me as much as they think they do.” There’s another one of his bright smiles. “This isn’t a sad ending, Pussy. What was it you were saying yesterday? This is a new age, isn’t it? You and Sam, you two are going to lead them somewhere new. Build a statue in my honor, alright? Make it the coolest statue ever. Bigger than anyone else, so the world will know how big of a man I am.”

Puffy laughs. Not just at his words, but his purposeful use of the name ‘Pussy’. Even now, he’s resorting to being obnoxious and crude, and she knows she’s going to miss it. “Tommy, you were the best of all of us.”

“Nah.” He snorts and shakes his head. “Do me one last favor, will you?”

“If it’s to beat up Dream, I’ll gladly take that on.”

“Okay, well two favors then.” Tommy’s eyes twinkle with amusement. “Give some blue to Tubbo, will you?” He offers her a few pieces, which she takes carefully, treating them like something extremely fragile, which they are.

“Any message you want me to pass to him?”

“Yeah: ‘it’ll be okay’.”

“That’s it?” Puffy lifts an eyebrow. “No ‘I love you’, no ‘you’ll carry on my legacy’, anything like that?”

“Puffy, Tubbo doesn’t need messages like that. He’s not that deep.” Tommy rolls his eyes. “No, just that it’ll be okay. He’ll be okay without me, he’ll be okay being Tubbo. He’s got Snowchester and shit, he’ll be okay.”

Puffy nods. “I’ll give him the blue and the message then, Tommy. Are you off?”

“Yeah. I can already hear Wilbur screaming at me and calling me a child. I’ve got to go punch his stupid face in, because I’m a big man and I can take him, even dead.”

Puffy laughs at that. Even with tears streaming down her cheeks, she feels a new sort of joy. “Tommy, can I hug you goodbye?”

No words are exchanged here, Tommy silently complies. He feels warm, so she wraps her arms firmly around him, holding him close. The hug is doing wonders; it’s like every inch of sadness is being pulled out of her, like he’s trying his best to help. When he finally pulls away, Puffy still feels light.

“It’ll be okay, Puffy,” Tommy says. He drops more blue at her feet. “Don’t let shit get you down too much, alright? You’re Captain Puffy, and you know better than anyone what needs to be done. But also don’t hesitate to ask for help when you need it.”

With that, he’s gone. Disappeared into some beyond, or afterlife, or wherever he’s going. Puffy doesn’t necessarily know where that might be, but knowing he’s with Wilbur in the end has her feeling better.

Bending down, she picks up the last of the blue. She wonders if when they all die, they’ll end up with blue, but that’s a fleeting thought as she puts it all in her backpack.

He’s right, it is a new age. She’s not going to let him down by wallowing in misery, not when she has a whole server to clean up. Marching toward the portal, Puffy wears a smile on her face. She’s got a new pep in her step, and she’s not going to let anyone take that away from her.

Not this time.

[kimmibers]

@pancakewaffles-blog1 Thank you for you prompt of ‘ Angels and Demons’ I hope you enjoy reading this. Sorry it’s taken me a few days. 

Kim xx

His Angel

“So...It's a full moon tonight..”

“It is?-”

“Come on Sasuke, tell your best friend-”

“You call yourself that, not me-”

“Ha! You can't fool me we've been best friends since imps, and anyway don't change the subject. Where does the Prince of darkness go every full moon?”

“That's just a mystery for the Prince of Darkness to know, and you, my little imp friend to never find out.” Sasuke smirked walking away.

With the sun finally set Sasuke, the devils least favourite son, sneaked across the border of his fathers realm. It was easy, it shouldn't have been but after years of eluding the guards it had become second nature.

The human world is their mutual territory, where angels and demons can inflict their abilities and create havoc, in the case of Sasuke's kind, and whatever angels created. In his opinion their influence could seem endearing but he found it meddlesome. Why couldn't they just leave the humans alone? What did it matter what happened to they puny, insignificant little lives?

In the human realm the sun had set hours ago, the forest, their secret spot, bathed in natural light of the moon.

Being a mid autumns night every now and again a cloud would cover their natural light basking them in darkness. These were the moments Sasuke enjoyed the most, the unspoken minutes when darkness could take away all their inhibitions and allowed them to take actions you wouldn't have done in light.

“Sasuke-Kun.” He smiled, the first since the last full moon.

“Hinata.” He answered simply.  

“Were you spotted?” He couldn't help the small chuckle of arrogance escape at her innocent question.

“Am I ever?”

“Good.” She sighed in relief.

They sat then, side by side on the log conveniently placed by a storm a few years back. Actually, in all honesty the storm had been Sasuke on one particular rampage. She lent her head against his shoulder and they sat in silence, looking to the moon.

“Our fathers -”

“Please, not this again.” Sasuke rolled his eyes. “We've been going back and forth over this for years now.”

“I know, but, do you think they would ever accept-”

“A demon and angel? No, I don't.” He lifted her chin for her now sad eyes to meet his,”Hinata, I don't mean my honesty to hurt you. But our parents are both set In their ways, for eons now. They just can't and won't understand our friendship.”

“I know your right, but I want them to see the good in you, like I do.”

“You're such an...an angel.” He chuckled, “I'm a demon, dark spawn, what light could you possibly see in me?”

“You joke, but I get the feeling your serious.” Hinata's eyes widened at the realisation. Sasuke stayed quiet and lent back. “Your mother.”

Sasuke turned away from Hinata, her words stinging him like a swarm of wasps. Although he knew she had never, and would never mean to cause him pain.

“I-I'm not allowed to talk about her.” Sasuke stammered uncharacteristically.

“Your father?”

“Hmm.” He agreed.

“Perhaps,” Hinatas voice gently guiding his eyes back to her. “I could tell you about her.”

“She a tooth fairy now?” He gave a small chuckle, trying to desperately hide the emotions building within.

“A guardian angel.”

“Seems fitting.” He smirked.

As predicted, a cloud enveloped the moon, their only sauce of light, and now in darkness he could ask a question without witnessing her reaction.

“Does she remember me?” His voice sounding to his own ear like the small child he had been when she had lost her life to save his own.

His mothers actions on that fateful day had changed Sasuke's life and not necessarily for the better. With his father in a state of despair and depression from the grief of loosing the love of his entire existence, he had become a empty vessel. His heart darkened with bereavement, turning him to the swiftly to an evil path and eventually becoming the devil and ruler of the daemon realm. In the years thereafter his fathers hate had turned from the world, to it's soul occupier: Sasuke.

“She begged to become the guardian of the boy she now in her care. I think, she reminds her of you.”

“Me?” Sasuke frowned.

“He's much younger of course being 13-”

“You forgot charming-”

“Oh how brainless of me,” She chuckled, “Yes, he has a certain charm I suppose.” She admitted. “His life could be radiant with light, if he would only make the right choices.”

With the cloud dissipating, the moon once again caked them in its beams of light. They remained quiet then, in a comfortable silence, both simply enjoying the others company without the need fill the space with inconsequential blabbering.

Sasuke's mind wondered to their 1st encounter. A mission; To bring balance to the human realm at the time engrossed in war. Such a mission was unheard of, an angel and demon required to work together. Between them they had had to make decisions, some harder than others. Compromised, when plans had gone astray. A life saved and another to be greeted by their fellows in the afterlife. In that, most troublesome and complex of time their friendship had formed, trust earned; something rarely given by himself.

“Hinata?”

“Hmm?” She replied. He glanced towards her, judging her reaction. Her eyes were closed and face pointing towards the moon, if they were in the sun anyone would think she was savouring the suns warmth.

“Do you think-” He stopped himself, and took pause of his thoughts.

“What is is Sasuke-Kun?” She turned her body, facing him, their knees almost touching. He scrutinized the sky, waiting obediently for the next inevitable cloud to conceal the moon once more.

“Do you think” He began again, “You can fall in love without a heart?”

Even in the darkness he could feel her gaze seeking his own. The space between them becoming so intense and electric could of fuelled an entire city.

In her own way Hinata didn't answer his question with words. Instead, he felt one of her fingers tentatively touching his own in the gap between them on their log.

“You've turned my world on it's axis,” He confessed in the pitch-black forest, “What had once seemed right, now seems wrong.” His hand took hold of her small one in his own and their fingers interlocked. “You starve and near exhaust me with your willingness to put others before yourself. Everything I've done, I've done for you. I'd move the stars for no-one; but you.” He heard her gasp, it's noise reverberating off the trees. “Don't you think we've done enough for humans? Our fathers? Perhaps it's time we be selfish, together.”

“I-I would like that.” Her voice sounding course with emotion.

“I would be human for you.”

“Sasuke.” She sighed. Of course she knew what those words meant. She knew his view on humans, and therefore understood the depth of them.

Then moon un-obscured by clouds once again, the secret placed doused in light. Therefore giving Sasuke the advantage of catching Hinata's quick glimpses from his eyes to his mouth. This own vision mirrored hers.

Slowly, they both closed the gap, both leaning towards the other. Sasuke angled his head to one side, to get a better angle. With his lips just a hairs width from hers he looked to her gaze once more, giving her the opportunity to pull away. She didn't. Hinata's eyes closed and at long last he felt her smooth and supple lips tenderly press his own. His own eyes closed and an involuntary groan escaped at the euphoria of such a sensation. He could feel her hands wrap around his shoulders pulling him all the more closer, his own wrapping around the curve of her waist.

He broke the kiss only to move his head to the other side, testing if a different angle achieved the same result. With each millisecond they had both come to the same conclusion, their lips touching would not be enough. Each opened their mouths, tongues grazed.

He may think humans insignificant and irrelevant but even he'd admit the act of kissing could very well redeem their every discretion.

[child-of-hurin]

So I’m thinking of a Narn AU where Húrin isn’t set on Thangorodrim and remains a prisoner in the fortress. His children are still cursed and he is still regularly shown images of them but it doesn’t take up all his time as it does in canon. I bring this up because I was curious what you think about how much of the bad things that befall Túrin and Niënor were explicitly planned before. Because I’ve always thought that the compelled incest part was at least in some way planned before and was very specifically about Húrin watching the ruining of his bloodline (which goes back to my other cursed HCs) in addition to the suffering it would bring his children.

Anyways no pressure to answer or anything I was just curious if this was something you had thought about

-@outofangband

(Disclaimer: I haven’t read much of the HoME besides what pertains the Narn, meaning I haven’t read any extended material on Melkor and so on.)

Honestly this is a very interesting question that I have posed myself before. It brings to mind this passage:

[Transcript:

Report of the Dragon-helm in the land west of Sirion came swiftly to the ear of Morgoth, and he laughed, for now  (1) Túrin was revealed to him again, who had long been lost in the shadows and under the veils of Melian. (2) Yet he began to fear that Túrin would grow to such a power that the curse that he had laid upon him would become void, and he would escape the doom that had been designed for him, or else that he might retreat to Doriath and be lost to his sight again. (3) Now therefore he had a mind to seize Túrin and afflict him even as his father, to torment him and enslave him.]

My conclusions here are:

(1) Melkor’s ‘eye’, which Húrin had been forced to access as well, couldn’t penetrate Doriath under Melian’s power. Makes me think the whole time Túrin was growing up, Melkor had Húrin watch Morwen and Nienor’s growing misery in Dor-Lómin instead?

(2) Everyone has talked about this a hundred times because it is so incredible. So the doom was defeatable? So, cosmically speaking, there was some validation in Túrin’s methods of seeking war and power? Much to think about

(3) This bit is the only passage I can recall where instead of vague threats, the text gives us a concrete plan of Melkor’s for this family. When he sets Glaurung forth, we have absolutely no idea whether his actions were meticulously planned by Melkor, a mastermind, or just strokes of Glaurung’s own evil creative genius as derivated from Melkor’s will or whatever.

So. My opinion is that it isn’t a plan. First and foremost because I hate the anime villain type who was secretly controlling all the variables of the game, but also because I genuinely don’t get this aesthetic from Melkor/Tolkien. Melkor’s power is godlike; it doesn’t come from logic control over the material world, but from a more intimate relationship with what makes the material world itself. 

Thinking of two events: one, when Melkor releases Húrin. Melkor has changed and posioned Húrin’s spirit, but Húrin isn’t aware of that. Húrin still hates Melkor, but, as we see in the Wanderings, he is still an agent of Melkor (to use a term @promin-blog​ used in [that interesting meta post you reblogged recently]). Compare that to Niënor, to whom something very similar happens: Glaurung poisons her spirit and then sets her free.

In my understanding, in neither of those two situations did Melkor or Glaurung know exactly what was going to be the outcome; they just knew it was going to be bad for their captives, and thus, good for them. Melkor is a being of chaos against the benign order of the world, so he fundamentally gains from an increase in the chaos, or a corruption in the order of the world. So when he explains the curse to Húrin, he says:

‘You say it,’ said Morgoth. ‘I am the Elder King: Melkor, first and mightiest of all the Valar, who was before the world, and made it. The shadow of my purpose lies upon Arda, and all that is in it bends slowly and surely to my will. But upon all whom you love my thought shall weigh as a cloud of Doom, and it shall bring them down into darkness and despair. Wherever they go, evil shall arise. Whenever they speak, their words shall bring ill counsel. Whatsoever they do shall turn against them. They shall die without hope, cursing both life and death.’

I take that at face value in terms of, this is literally how it works. He didn’t know exactly that Húrin would kill Mîm, bring the Nauglamír to Thingol, then fight with his once-beloved Haladin kin and cause their destruction, just like I don’t think Glaurung knew Niënor would find Túrin, fall in love with him and have his child. BUT they knew releasing these poisoned agents would benefit their cause one way or another. (I do think Melkor presumed correctly that Húrin might try to find Gondolin though! Hence the spies). So I guess I don’t agree with you that the incest was pre-planned, although I do think the ruining of Húrin’s bloodline was definitely a huge point that, in Melkor’s mind, was probably inevitable. If Túrin had, say, had a baby with Finduilas, Melkor would have gotten a hold of that baby too, at some point... I think when he says he is the master of the Fates of Arda, he means that his will has too powerful a hold over Arda to be broken, and not, necessarily, that he controls every detail of it.

That makes me think of that passage you mentioned recently in your blog:

“But ever the Noldor feared most the treachery of their own kin who had been thralls in Angband; for Morgoth used some of them for his evil purposes, and feigning to give them liberty sent them abroad; but their wills were chained to his and they strayed only to come back to him again” (”Of the Ruin of Beleriand”, p188, The Silmarillion)

It makes me wonder how many of these elves were, like Maeglin, aware of their own collaboration, and how many might have hated Melkor their whole lives while still being agents of his will 😬

It’s a super depressing thing, this possiblity that the Narn puts forth, of an otherwise free person being permanently and inescapably ruined for as long as you hold your material existance in this realm. It is the ultimate corruption of free will, because it means no matter which choices you make, they will always come to evil. You’re helpless: intent doesn’t matter, hard work doesn’t matter. I think it’s fitting with Melkor being a god, after all! That’s why it’s relevant that out of the five members of this family, only one is directly murdered by Melkor’s actions. The others take their own lives, although more indirectly in the case of Morwen - the only one who “was not conquered”. The rest of them, Túrin, Nienor, and Húrin, end up choosing death as an escape, and I think it is in a way because they ultimately understand that Melkor is playing on a godlike level that they, as mortals, cannot reach.

WHICH BRINGS ME TO ANOTHER DEPRESSING THING. We, as readers, have the benefit of knowing that Mandos exists and Eru exists and the Ainulindale happened. We have also read about Beren’s spirit lingering in Mandos waiting for Lúthien. So we ASSUME there is an afterlife for the second-born. We know Tolkien envisioned that, spiritual man that he was. But in the narrative, mortals themselves don’t have any reassurance of that! 

So this exchange here becomes even more chilling:

So? 

Did he lie?

[kurisus]

Chapter 88-2 thoughts

I’m writing this at 6 AM because I CAN’T SLEEP WOO. As mentioned in my snaps, I first read this chapter while in a work call so I’m rereading it now to be able to focus a bit better. Buckle up, this will be long. Spoilers as always.

So Yukine was not necessarily snuggling with the wolves. He was asking them to eat him. I think in all the other bad stuff happening this chapter this detail got overlooked slightly but it’s bad!!!!

Who was the shadow we saw approaching him when he was with the wolves?? Was it trash dad after all? I think it has to be.

really don’t appreciate the Suzuha mention in THE YEAR OF OUR LORD TWO THOUSAND AND TWENTY

Yukine was such a caring brother it makes my heart hurt. Yukine in general makes my heart hurt. How did it end up happening that his mom just left him behind??

so if Fujisaki is telling the truth, we now know the context of Yukine’s death. And somehow, I think this is the most unpleasant revelation to come out of this chapter. Big statement, I know, but it explains...a lot.

Yukine was writing letters to his sister in secret for probably years, and as soon as his dad found out...well, we know the rest. I remember speculating (and a few others did too) why Yukine was barefoot and not struggling in that panel a couple chapters back that showed his final moments. So if he was already beaten enough to warrant hospitalization, that would explain why he wasn’t reacting the way he should have been.

At this point, if trash dad WAS telling the truth, I’d be fine if they didn’t show the actual scene of his death and just left it at that. Which means...we now know everything about Yukine’s time when he was alive. And of course there’s a lot we can say to fill out the gaps, but we have all the most important details. Finding out exactly how he died was the last piece in the puzzle. Aside from his full first name, that is.

Yukine yelling at trash dad to shut up and him continuing on anyway :) we really needed to know his final thoughts were “why?” :) I hate it here :)

I really hate even talking about this, this shit is FUCKED

okay so as far as trash dad is aware, Yukine’s body was still in the fridge. Meaning he had no idea that Yato went to dig it up all those months ago. Meaning Nora never breathed a word about it to him. I don’t really know how to express my feelings on this but thank you Nora. we owe you one. I have a feeling trash dad’s intent was not to give him a proper burial (since he’s all about false shows of kindness), though as to what it was, I cannot say.

I think at this point it’s pretty clear that Yato is the one who gave him a proper burial. When the panel of the empty refrigerator dropped a few months back, the fact that the body was missing struck me as just odd, and I thought maybe Yukine’s dad dug it back up for some sort of weird ritual, but judging by what we know now, that doesn’t seem likely. As soon as people started saying Yato buried him I was smacking my face like “of COURSE that’s what happened duh”

so trash dad is confirmed to drop his body in a very similar way to Hiyori, and we also confirmed that the version of him in the black robe is his spirit form. Nora mentioned his “body” a while back but now we finally got to see it. Is he a half ayakashi?? Is this just something he can do because he’s possessing Fujisaki’s body??? gah Adachitoka I want ANSWERS

Hagusa’s vessel name is just a double whammy. It’s like a horrible inversion of the fact that Yato named Kazuma Kazune. “Kazune” has the double meaning of referring to their time limit as well as being the “Kazu” Yato was already familiar with. With Hagusa, that name refers to a type of grain that looks like rice...in other words, something that appears valuable but is worthless. And now we see the vessel name is Yuuki? Adachitoka galaxy brained to punch me in the face.

SO THE REASON YUKINE DOESN’T HAVE A CELL PHONE IS BECAUSE HE DIED BEFORE THEY WERE INVENTED???? I always thought it was because he didn’t need one since Yato, Hiyori, Kazuma, and Kofuku were really the only people he needed to communicate with. but he seemed really excited to use trash dad’s. I’m in pain.

I’m thinking back to when Hiyori almost asked Yukine how he died way back in the beginning of the manga and trash dad now telling Yukine “Hiyori never wanted to know? I bet she did, since humans always want to pry into other people’s business” you shut your mouth

Speaking of Hiyori all we got of her this chapter was her looking pissed off. When she arrives to the fight I just want her to fuck shit up. She may not have her half ayakashi form but she can still snap trash dad’s neck in half.

Perhaps the reason Yukine didn’t find any news articles about himself was because “Haru” was just a nickname. I find it hard to believe that there was nothing about him going missing, especially since his dad made a fuss with putting up missing person flyers everywhere. There’s no way the police wouldn’t have gotten involved, right?

Either way it doesn’t really matter--his dad never got charged with anything even if he was a suspect, and no one else cared enough to look either.

this is so many levels of fucked

“So even now my father is still killing me” this line. THIS LINE. THIS FUCKING LINE. It’s such a succinct and excellent summary of Yukine as a character--as much as we love our son, the fact remains that he is dead. And he is dead because of his father’s abuse and society’s neglect. So no matter however much he grows and changes in the afterlife, it cannot change that his life was cut short far too soon, and everything good that happens to him is overshadowed by the fact that it’s indirectly because of his nasty father. And he got away with it. I can’t.

Before this chapter came out I speculated we’d want to strangle Yukine’s dad even more than we already did. and I was right. but holy shit this line was a kick in the gut while I’m still recovering from “that boy loved people”

Yukine loved people too....he loved people and they turned their backs on him BUT HE NEVER GAVE UP ON LOVING!!! IT JUST TOOK A DIFFERENT SHAPE. FUCK.

So Father knows someone visited the fridge. I wonder if he’s figured out that it was Hiyori yet. I just want her to snap him like a twig. it’s what he deserves.

Father also doesn’t care about Yukine, like, at all (we been knew), to the point he couldn’t even realize the only blond character in this fucking manga now has black hair. MAN. that just says a lot about him, huh.

Are we going to find out whether one of his parents was foreign?? He and Yuka are both noticeably light-haired and it hasn’t been addressed aside from Yukine’s hair color changing.

The hair color change was the only spoiler I saw before the chapter came out and it’s been haunting me ever since. I thought initially Yukine dyed his hair while trash dad was out, but now I wonder if the dark hair is his vessel form? Fujisaki summoned him before leaving, so I don’t know. He does look like his bird ayakashi form with having clawed hands as well.

I remember seeing speculation that trash dad generally tells the truth. well as of this chapter we know he’s a fucking liar. Hiyori left that flower, and I think it will end up being important in the long run when Yukine realizes that she’s the only human who truly cares about him.

Whether trash dad has been telling the truth about other things remains to be seen. We still don’t know how he got out of Yomi, if that’s really what happened to make him immortal. But this lie about the flower seems to be a white lie. He could have just said he didn’t know. If he so readily lied about this, who’s to say he hasn’t been lying about other things too, you know?

Yukine destroying the fridge would normally make me be like good for her.jpeg but since the context is him with trash dad I actually hate it

Since Yukine is now so eager to meet his dad I can’t shake the feeling that he’s dead. It would be the perfect gut-punch for him to demand why his father killed him, only to find out that he’s dead (and maybe even that YATO did it...which would only add more fuel to the fire....fuck) and never get to resolve his turmoil.

I’ve been on the fence about whether Yukine’s dad is still alive but based on this chapter I’m putting my bets on “he’s dead and Yato killed him back in the early manga because that would cause the most suffering at present and that generally seems to be the route Adachitoka takes.”

Like, yeah, if Yato did it it was to protect Yukine, but that doesn’t matter when he’s already so pissed off at Yato.

Yato only fired on trash dad because he didn’t know that it was Yukine with him. And Yukine is again thinking that Yato is trying to hurt him. This chapter is also a horrible inversion of...was it 83-2? where Yato tried to kill trash dad and Yukine stopped him? Except now this time it’s not because Yukine wants answers, it’s because he’s pissed at Yato and loyal to trash dad.

Yato was also a fool for thinking sniping trash dad from afar would work, especially when it didn’t even work the first time.

So now the thing I’ve been working up to talking about throughout these many, many words: Hagusa’s vessel form is...himself. He is the weapon. This is such a wonderful (and terrible) narrative choice I’m delighted by where it will take us physically and metaphorically, but obviously it hurts. A lot.

Yuuki being himself the weapon that trash dad fights Yato with for what may be their final showdown is such a fitting culmination to his character arc in this section of the story. (when trash dad said he would turn him into a weapon I DIDN’T REALIZE IT WAS LITERAL)

This is also a good choice art-wise because it means even more pain with seeing Yukine physically fighting Yato rather than Yato and trash dad fighting with swords or something.

So Yato met with Yuka before (it was a flashback, as many people pointed out to me after I goofed last month lmao) but whether that was earlier today or further in the past remains to be seen. I hope he told her to get out because it seems like trash dad is heading into her house while Yato and Yukine face off.

well. “face off” is maybe an exaggeration. Yato will not be able to fight Yukine at all and I’m anticipating he gets the shit kicked out of him, again, while he tries to make him see reason. bro. I hate this. I really, really hate this. This final fight is going all the ways I knew it would, but hoped it wouldn’t.

Hiyori and Nora come help please

July can’t come soon enough

I’m pretty sure this is my longest thoughts post ever. so much happened and I have so many feelings about all of it.

[imnotoverlyobsessive]

Dun dun dun! I started writing it like the day after I finished the last one and I’m already working on the next one. That’s how excited I am here. As always, a huge thank you to @edward-or-ford for being my beta!

Looks Like Someone Picked a Whole Bushel of Oopsie Daisies

Chapter Six: The Reveal

Can you feel it now? I’ve weighed it all out. Here and now, my world turns inside out. - Cartel, Only You

There are instances in our lives when we see or hear something so utterly shocking that our brains short-circuit and stop working entirely beyond the basic functions required to keep our bodies alive. Some things simply cause the brain to react in a 404-thought-process-not-found sort of way. That’s just how it is with some things, and it can’t really be avoided.

When confronted with something our brains cannot handle, we have a tendency to think, say, and do, unusual things. Someone might laugh at the shock of seeing a corpse, but that isn’t because they actually find the situation amusing. They are simply so horrified that their brain doesn’t know how to react, and so the person laughs as a coping mechanism.

In that strange, incredible, unimaginable moment, Mabel recalled holding her grandfather’s hand as he murmured nonsensical things on his deathbed. He kept saying that he was going on a trip, but he wasn’t packed or ready, that he couldn’t leave yet. Mabel was only eleven at the time and didn’t really grasp the significance, but she eventually came to understand that her grandfather, though not really there mentally, recognized he was dying and that his brain was trying to help him cope with the impossible.

Mabel was not dying, however, although she thought that perhaps she was already dead (she felt rather weightless, and the scenario she found herself in seemed entirely out of the question for her, so what explanation could there be other than there being an afterlife she didn’t even necessarily believe in? Did people who were in love with their siblings even get a happily ever after(life)? Mabel didn’t know, and she didn’t have the presence of mind to overthink it), so when Dipper pulled his sleeve back over his wrist and pulled it against his stomach, looking away with adorably flushed cheeks, it occurred to Mabel that he probably shouldn’t have been moving in slow motion, but he was. It was like she was falling, and she was in that split second right before you hit the ground where everything moves so slowly it almost seems like time is frozen completely.

She’d been right. He’d been planning on showing her his soulmark. And she was… no, no. That’s not possible. It had never occurred to Mabel that Dipper could be her soulmate and she had therefore never done any research, but how could it be possible that she and Dipper shared a soulmark? She’d never heard of such a thing. As far as she knew, the general consensus on incest was… unfavorable, to put it mildly. Sure, technically speaking, all soulmate couples were legal provided both parties were of age, but she’d simply never considered the possibility that incestuous soulmates would have ever even come up.

The only logical conclusion was, of course, that she had misinterpreted what she saw, and that while Dipper did have a soulmark (and the skin surrounding it wasn’t red and irritated the way it usually was with newly formed soulmarks), it most certainly was not a match with hers, although it was similar enough to be mistaken for hers upon first glance.

No. Of course it wouldn’t have matched Mabel’s soulmark. She was the freak, after all. Dipper was normal, and he had a normal soulmark just like everyone else, and he probably knew who his soulmate was, and he was gonna start dating her and move in with her in one of the government-funded Young Adult Soulmate apartments, and they’d get married right out of high school or maybe even right away, and they’d have their first kid of many right after college, and Mabel would be left trying her hardest to be kind to the soulmate-turned-wife-turned-mother-of-Dipper’s-children and the lucky bitch would get to touch Dipper in a way that Mabel never would and he’d look at her in a way he’d never look at Mabel and Mabel would babysit their children while Dipper and his wife/soulmate (who was decidedly not Mabel) went on dates and came home all lovey-dovey and they’d have sex like all the time because soulmates always had sex all the time and oh god if his soulmate was seventeen already then Dipper would’ve… he already would’ve… oh god oh god oh god no she didn’t wanna picture that, anything but that, no-

There was the sound of a quiet, gasping breath of someone who was very clearly crying, but it wasn’t until Dipper’s head whipped around to look at Mabel with wide, shocked eyes that she realized her cheeks were wet and the sound had come from her own throat.

Dipper blinked at her, surprised, and all Mabel could think of was if the makeup was waterproof or not, thanking of how furious Candy would be if she knew Mabel had ruined her friend’s Sephora eyeliner and mascara by crying, before remembering that yes, it was indeed waterproof, much her relief.

“Uh…” Dipper’s voice was awkward and squeaky and ugh stop being so fucking adorable you fucking asshole. “Why… why are you crying?”

Mabel took another watery breath. “Don’t worry about it, I’m fine.”

Dipper stared at her dubiously. “No, I don’t think you are, so please tell me why you’re upset.”

Mabel whimpered and shook her head, wisps of hair flying around her face as she did so.

He ran a hand over his face (which bore a remarkable resemblance to a tomato that had been genetically engineered to make it as red as possible) and tugged on the hair hanging over his forehead.

“Look, I know… I know that I’m not what you wanted, or what you pictured in a soulmate,” Mabel’s eyes shot up from her hands in her lap to his face. What? “But, I mean, would, y’know… would being with me really be the worst thing in the world?” His voice was quiet, almost a whisper, but Mabel couldn’t speak at all. “I mean, I was pretty surprised, too, when I found out, but I was also really, really happy, because there’s no one I’d rather have as my soulmate than you, and I get that the whole twincest thing is pretty gross to most people so it’s fair if you feel that way, too, of course, but even so, I… I…”

He trailed off, taking a deep breath before speaking again, his voice stronger and surer. “I’ve been in love with you for so long, I feel like it’s just been building up for years and after we hit seventeen I couldn’t keep holding it in, and I had to tell you. I’m sorry, I just couldn’t keep it from you anymore. I tried, I tried so hard, but I couldn’t and I’m sorry. Mabel, I…” he looked at her, something intense and crazed and alive swirling in his eyes, and his voice returned to a whisper again. “Fucking hell, Mabes, I burn for you so goddamn badly that sometimes I think it’s going to kill me.” There was a severity to his voice despite the whisper. “I’ll give you the fucking world, I swear, I’ll give you anything you want. So I’m gonna ask again: would being with me really be the worst thing in the world?”

The tears hadn’t stopped. They hadn’t even slowed. He opened his mouth to speak again (it seemed that once Dipper started with the whole revelations thing, he couldn’t really stop), but Mabel cut him off.

“How long?”

He blinked, surprised that she’d finally said something. “Huh?”

“How long have you known?”

“Uhhh…” he trailed off, looking away awkwardly.

“I’ve had my mark for as long as I can remember, Dipper,” she said in a low, dangerous voice. “You must’ve had yours for just as long. How long have you known?”

He buried a hand in his hair, blushing to his roots again. “Remember that time when we were Skyping and mom left you alone for a minute and you showed me your soulmark? Yeah....”

“Are you fucking kidding me? That was… that was three years ago!” Mabel’s voice was still quiet, but then she exploded. “Do you… do you have any idea, any fucking clue, the slightest goddamn inkling, how much agony I’ve been in? Do you have any idea at all?”

Astonished by his sister’s rage, Dipper shrunk back. “Uhh… no?”

Mabel was fuming. How dare he keep something so important from her? “You… you… you bastard! I have been in love with you for years! Years of guilt and pain and… and misery just because I loved somebody I felt like I shouldn’t, but whoops, guess it turns out it wasn’t even my fucking fault, was it, it’s just that my absolute dickhead of a brother or a soulmate or whatever the fuck you are now, he just decided not to tell me, or he forgot, or some other bullshit!” Her voice was shaking, and she was cursing way more than she normally did. Dipper, for his part, looked properly guilt-stricken. “Anything else, asshat? Anything else you’d like to share with the class?” She demanded, crossing her arms over her chest.

She was still crying, but they were angry -furious, really- tears. His face was frozen in shock, however. “You… you’re in love with me?”

Mabel blushed too, and forced herself to stay angry despite the adorably dopey, astonished, thrilled expression on his face. “So what? That’s not the point here,” she snapped.

“You’re in love with me,” he repeated, still in shock. “Really? Are you sure?”

“What kind of question is that? Of course I’m sure, but again: that’s not the point here!”

He didn’t even seem to hear her, he just kept staring at her, an elated expression on his face. “You’re in love with me,” he said again, his dopey smile growing.

“Yes, I’m in love with you, get over it, Dipper!” She actually raised her voice at that point. He certainly wasn’t absorbing her words any other way. Taking a deep breath, she continued. “Now then, is there anything else I need to know?”

He blinked, recognition returning to his eyes as if he’d been snapped back into reality. “Well, I guess there are some things you should probably know…”

“Well? She snapped after a few seconds.

“Well, uh… apparently, siblings being soulmates isn’t that uncommon, and usually siblings who are soulmates are actually twins, so it’s not like we’re super unusual or anything.”

“Great to know I’m not a freak of nature. Thanks so much for telling me as soon as I started feeling that way,” she said sarcastically.

“Err… sorry,” he mumbled. “There’s also, well… I mean… I’ve done a lot of research on why soulmates are who they are, so…”

“Uh huh. Go ahead, then,” she said with a wave of her hand, having done minimal research herself.

“Well, you see, it’s determined by…” he murmured the last part so quietly she couldn’t hear him.

“What’s that?”

He told a deep breath before attempting to speak again. “It’s determined by emotional compatibility as well as capability for physical attraction, and physical compatibility, which obviously means, um…” she raised her eyebrows at him. “Which obviously means… y’know. Sexual compatibility.” He coughed uncomfortably. “It’s also determined by who can help the other person have the healthiest kids possible. Even kids that are born from incestuous soulmates are usually healthier than unrelated non-soulmates.”

Sex. Sex with Dipper. Dipper on top of her, underneath her, inside her. Images from dreams and fantasies flashed in Mabel’s mind, but she pushed them away as firmly as she could. She was still pissed at the dickbag, after all.

Oh, but children with Dipper. Their children. Together. Fucking hell, she’d never truly let herself consider that long enough to want it, but once she thought about it, she wanted it so badly she thought she might start crying again.

No! Shoving those thoughts from her mind, too, Mabel scowled at him.

“Anything else?”

He sighed. “Well… our parents have known our whole lives.”

“What?”

He nodded. “Why d’you think they kept us apart, or fed us that allergy bullshit? We’re not allergic to each other, they just didn’t want us touching ‘cause we’re soulmates.”

“And I assume you’ve known that for years, too?”

He nodded again.

“Fucking hell,” she muttered, staring out the window briefly. She needed to escape. She needed to escape him or she’d throttle him. Undoing her seatbelt with shaking hands as more tears threatened to fall, Mabel unlocked the car door and threw it open.

“Uhhh, what’re you doing?” Dipper questioned as she stood up, heels digging into the cold, wet grass.

“I can’t be around you right now,” she told him flatly before shutting the door behind her and walking off.

To her horror, she heard the driver’s side door open behind her, sneakers touch the ground, and the close of the car door.

“Mabel!” He called out, and she could tell he was jogging over to her. Dammit. Just as she was about to get to the edge of the clearing and escape into the woods, too. “Mabel, wait,” he’d reached her side. Just fan-fucking-tastic.

“Leave me alone,” she snapped, refusing to look at him.

“I’m sorry, but I can’t do that,” he told her, stepping in front of her to block her path.

“For one thing, you took off your coat earlier and you didn’t put it back on and it’s way too cold for you to be walking around in jeans and a shirt, no matter how…” he shuddered, his eyes raking over her. “No matter how incredibly attractive you may look.”

Squashing down her joy at the compliment, she kept eyes on her feet. “I don’t care. Leave me alone.” Tears caught on her eyelashes as she blinked. She felt so conflicted. She was so angry with him, but she wanted nothing more than to nestle herself into his arms. She wanted to scream at him, but she also wanted to whisper her adoration in his ear. She wanted to punch him, but she also wanted to kiss him. She was thrilled beyond all measure at the prospect of being his soulmate, but she was also terrified beyond belief. She’d never been so conflicted in her life.

“Mabel,” he said her name quietly, like a prayer. Like a curse. Like she was the answer to every question that had ever been asked in the history of the world. “I’m sorry. I should’ve told you. I was scared of what our parents would do, but more than anything, I was so, so petrified you wouldn’t want me.”

“Idiot,” she muttered, tears still flowing freely as she kicked at the grass. “We’re soulmates. I have no choice but to want you.”

She heard the smile in his voice. “Yeah, I guess that’s true, huh? We want each other no matter what.”

“Well you don’t have to sound so happy about it,” she snapped.

“I can’t help it. I love you, and I’m just… I’m so fucking happy you love me back.”

“Idiot,” she said again.

“Yup, that’s me. I’m an idiot,” he agreed, still very clearly grinning like he’d won the goddamn lottery. Raising her gaze to his to glare viciously at him, she found herself startled by how overwhelmingly gorgeous he was, and- no, no, still mad, remember?

Noticing she’d been crying again, she supposed, he took a step towards her, hand outstretched. “Mabel, I really am sorry. I never, ever wanted to hurt you.”

She backed up faster than a Smart Car trying to get away from an eighteen wheeler. “N-no!” She stuttered out. “Don’t touch me!”

If he got any closer, she didn’t think she’d have been able to stop herself from whacking him.

He stopped, hurt clear in his eyes, and lowered his hand. “It’d make you feel better if I held you,” he told her softly.

“I don’t care,” she snapped again.

“I do, though. You’re angry and hurt and I caused it. Please let me fix it.”

“I can’t promise I won’t hit you if you come near me,” she warned.

“That’s okay. Hit me if it’ll help,” he took another step, this one slow, as if she were a wounded animal he’d found in the wild and was afraid he’d scare away.

All of a sudden, the fear that had been pushed out of her mind in place of her anger came rushing back. He’d never touched her before, and she was petrified.

He stepped closer to her, and time seemed to slow down again. When he finally reached her and wrapped his arms around her, pulling her flush against him, she felt as if the universe would collapse in on itself.

She couldn’t hold her sobs in, so she didn’t, and she couldn’t really seem to keep her fists from pounding against his chest, either. He was so warm, and he was being so goddamn sweet, and in that moment she hated him with every fiber of her being.

He wasn’t even fighting back. He was just letting her hit him. Not that it was particularly hard, of course; it probably didn’t hurt him in the slightest. She looked up at his stupid, idiotic face to tell off his stupid, idiotic ass again, just for good measure, and when she did, he reached up and brushed away her tears with his thumb.

It was the first time his skin had touched hers in as far back as either of them could recall.

And then, suddenly, she remembered something about soulmates who hadn’t, y’know… consummated things yet: skin-to-skin contact flipped what was essentially an aphrodisiac switch that had a tendency to make both parties lose a fair amount of self-control.

It was probably an evolutionary mechanism meant to encourage reproduction as quickly as possible. In all actuality, though, it was just a pain in the ass.

Mabel subconsciously pressed her body against Dipper’s. The arm that was still around her held her tighter, his hand traveling into her hair.

“When’d you get so tall?” She wondered as she looked up at him. Her burning anger had given way to a different kind of burning altogether.

He shrugged. “Kinda happened… gradually, I guess?”

“Hm,” she acknowledged, playing with the fabric of his coat and staring at her fingers.

“Mabel?” His voice was soft, and she looked back up at him questioningly. “Can I… can I kiss you?”

Images flashed through her mind with lightning speed again. “Yes,” she whispered.

With a slowness that was downright agonizing, Dipper placed his hand on Mabel’s cheek (to hold himself steady as much as her, but don’t tell either of them that), leaned down, and gently, ever so gently, pressed his lips to hers.

[ofmythsandmadness]

MY THOUGHTS ON TUA SEASON TWO: PART TWO (spoilers)

So...I finished season two.

I’m putting ALL my thoughts under the tab so please, don’t click unless you’ve seen it all, and/or you just....like don’t care about spoilers? But please if you’ve not watched it, watch it first ‘cause it deserves all the hype and attention.

You can read part one to this here.

FIVE HARGREEVES…

I deadass thought he was gonna die.

I thought throughout the entire show that he was going to die, and ESPECIALLY at the end, I thought that was it. I guess I’m glad though that he didn’t die of course. But I was convinced, and glad he didn’t and that there was no shock-value death of a major character. 

(though like maybe one of them should have gotten hit by a bullet in one of those final scenes?? I mean….there were bullets EVERYWHERE. By SO many guns. How did they miss every time????)

Aiden Gallagher did a terrific job with the character. I don’t agree with the things he personally has done but I am convinced on his acting abilities, I mean JEEZ. He sold the act and alongside Diego/David Casteneda, was really one of the best actors on the show. I am thoroughly impressed. I didn’t really like him much in Season One, but he’s sold the role to me now and I’m very impressed.

That being said... I kinda hated Five. That’s it. I liked him in general but some parts, I was so pissed off and just didn’t like. He was an asshole and I know he IS an asshole but it was beyond just being a grumpy old pisspot. And I don’t know really how to feel, because I know being 45 years alone and lost and then becoming the world’s best assassin or whatever will fuck your head up, so it makes sense. I just think there were points where he lost most of his humanity, and then he’d flip-flop back to a more caring being. I sort of just wished there was a clear definition to all of his thoughts and emotions on it all.

But at the same time his character makes sense so I don’t know how to feel??? Maybe I’m just pissed on how he treated Diego and shit. But I’m very very glad he’s not dead!! 

ALLISON HARGREEVES…

Okay, I thought she was REALLY dead in that scene. You know the one I’m talking about.

Holy shit.

I was so scared. And also it was so sudden (and a little cool admittedly how Lila just threw it back at her like that - HOW DO I WORD thAT NON-SEXUALLY) and I was so fucking worried they’d kill her off, because I find sometimes her character comes off a little disposable. Not because I want her gone, more that the show finds her an afterthought and pushes her with someone or ‘silences’ her.

But overall I loved her storyline. I didn’t know if I’d like her just being married, it felt again like an afterthought and she was being pushed to be with someone, but the civil rights movement plot was really well done, in my eyes. I loved too the agony of having such impressive powers, but scared of the effects of doing so and also not wanting to be the person she was before. I felt for her and I was so impressed with her separating herself from her past, trying to push away from being the one who had it all and trying to be her own self. I think that this season did that really well, with all the characters and finding themselves, and I just...I want her to be happy, and successful and I want to see her find a way to use her powers without causing pain to herself or others.

And not be with Luther. Please, anyone who can do a thing about it reading this, do not make her and Luther a thing.

(also - emmy raver lampman is in general so goddamn talented and beautiful and i wish her the best. i just heard her rendition of satisfied and me oh my, that gal deserves so much more love, i hope this show catapults her career even more forward)

VANYA HARGREEVES…

Literally invented cottagecore.

Also, I love her.

I was so impressed with the way they handled her queer storyline. I was so worried about it, admittedly because television shows have a history of handing out stereotypical plotlines and not caring about the depth of them but dear FUCKING heavens, I loved this one. I cried like a baby, and yet I was left almost happy, at the end? Not happy, because they’re apart and Sissy’s stuck in a world that she can’t be herself in, but there was a beautiful bittersweetness that I adored about it. And it was realistic, and they didn’t just follow a trope and leave it there to wither up and die.

Vanya was adorable in this season and while I normally hate the amnesiac storyline, I think it’s an easy way out, I liked it here! Because yeah it was I guess an ‘easy way out’, but it worked and it made Vanya be able to be here and actually start over. I didn’t want to see her so burdened with who she had been and who she was forced to be, I wanted to see her smile and dance and love her siblings and she could and I couldn’t be happier. I mean, when she was just saying how she loved her family and her family was amazing...obviously it’s funny cause the family’s so messed up, but she meant it and I just want so much good for her.

I just love how they naturally developed the idea of the Hargreeves genuinely liking each other. This season really brought them together but unlike the first, it wasn’t necessarily because they had to, but because they wanted to. And I think Vanya did that for them. 

Basically...I don’t know how to put it all into words without making this a 70-page thesis essay. But I love her and want the best for her.

(side note - I really also was impressed with Harlan. I was scared that somehow they were going to do something stupid with him, but he was adorable and I loved him. his character made me tear up a little, too. as someone who has close family with severe autism, it’s rare to see a show that doesn’t make an upsetting and non-accurate portrayal out of someone on the spectrum. but he was so precious and smart and good and Sissy loved him and dammit, I would die for that little family)

I’m ALSO curious if Vanya’s gonna visit Sissy ever? I mean I thought she would have at the end but obviously the cliffhanger didn’t leave room for that...idk know though because I think with multiverse theories and whatnot, she wouldn’t even know her but...eh.

KLAUS HARGREEVES…

I don’t actually have much to say on him, which is shocking because in Season One, I could have written a whole book on his character. But that doesn’t mean I didn’t love him! He’s still one of my favourites, and I wish I could just take away his pain because that boy deserves at least a kernel of good in his life. But truly, there’s just not much I know to say about him??

The scene in the restaurant with Dave and his uncle though hurt. What hurt more though was his nonchalant nature about it, because he’s been through that so many times and he almost expected it, which hurt. It’s expected and I knew he couldn’t just waltz up to Dave and confess his love and they’d be dandy, but as a queer person, it was a punch to the heart just watching him go through that.

I just want him to be happy someday, and bond with his siblings because there’s a deep sadness that lurks with Klaus, and maybe it’s from the actor too but there’s a melancholy that I relate to, which I hate because that melancholy is a heavy burden to carry. A worthlessness, and a deep depression that he’s seemed to have fallen into that’s a bitch to climb out of and I’m scared that he won’t be able to. He covers it up in funny gestures and vices but it’s still destroying him. Even the cult - he lacks any real love and he finds it in meaningless places, never remembering their names or anything about them and coming off as an asshole when really, he’s just looking for someone who truly cares about him, who he is on the inside and listens to him without yknow, becoming brainwashed and treating him like a god.

I’m interested to see where the show takes his character.

BEN HARGREEVES…

This show really said fuck my feelings on this one, huh???

EPISODE NINE MADE ME SO NUMB AND SAD AND JUST - FUCK.

I cried so hard when he got to save the day. He finally could do more than just follow Klaus around, and he finally got to be more than their dead brother. For so long, Ben was just an idea, a memory and I can only imagine the pain of having to deal with that. They touch on it in the show but it’s so much deeper than just being alone with only Klaus to talk to - I mean Ben was literally nothing, to any of the others, aside from being their dead brother. And when he finally got to save them, and save Vanya and fucking HUG HER AS HE PASSES ON TO THE AFTERLIFE….when I tell you I sobbed....

And his hug with Diego, how HAPPY they both were….the way that they both just….:’((

And that scene with young Klaus and Ben....Netflix when I said I wanted more Ben content I don’t know if I meant THIS.

At the same time...it was beautiful and bittersweet because he was happy, almost, moving on to his next life. He was able to do what he needed to and move on and that was beautiful. And, he got to say goodbye to at least some of his siblings, and so I can’t truly be sad about his passing. Even though it made me sob like a newborn babe.

But also...what the fuck was that ending?

And by that I mean, who the fuck signed off on that stupid lil’ haircut??? HUH???? WHY DID HE LOOK LIKE HE WAS WEARING FUCKING FAKE BANG-CLIPONS AOIHWGOIHWOIWHOIGWH

IN CONCLUSION. Fuck Reginald Hargreeves and also just FUCK.

In conclusion, I really loved this season. It ended happier than I expected and that makes me happy, so much more happy then I thought I would have been. TUA has been one of my favourite shows, and I’ve over the past while waiting for S2, developed several strong loves for these characters. More than I’ve ever cared about others. And for the most part, they were given the justice I hoped they would be.

Overall, I am happy. And I hope we get season three, almost entirely just so I can figure out if Ben Hargreeves is wearing fake-bang clip ons or not. And also...like for everything else.

Also, what the fuck is a Sparrow Academy? Whomst??? And where’s miss Lila?? And are they technically related and if so HUH?? And also...no rights to Mr Reginald.

This is such a messy summary, lmao.

But let me know what you think! I’m going to rewatch it soon, probably tonight and I’m so excited to fall even more in love with it. (and them)