#not that any of you asked for my personal opinions

[sage-nebula]

In my personal opinion, all three of these have a high probability of backfiring. They assume that the person you're interacting with knows your intention, and/or is interacting in good faith, but on the chance that isn't true (and there is a good chance there isn't), all this will do is escalate the situation and make it worse.

To explain in detail:

"Are you okay?" — This comes across as incredibly passive-aggressive and patronizing if it's said in response to someone who is, by all appearances, in fine health. Particularly if the person you're speaking with is already in a hostile mood, they won't read this as concern, but rather as mockery, and it WILL further escalate the situation. Further, the HR representative has every opportunity here to put their own feelings into what you meant: did you have genuine reason to believe your coworker was in distress? Or were you passive-aggressively insinuating you believed they were deranged? Because the coworker believes the latter and that's why they reported you (after yelling even more in response to you passive-aggressively calling them crazy).

"Could you repeat that for me?" / "Can you explain what you mean?" — Playing dumb can work if, and only if, the coworker is genuinely not an asshole. However, some people are. And these people will see these questions and repeat / explain themselves in an even more condescending, insulting way: slowed down speech, over-enunciated sounds, little words. Now, you could get them with HR even harder for this, but you're taking a hit first.

So, what should you say instead? Here is your step-by-step guide.

Step 1: Acknowledge Their Issue — This is NOT the same as apologizing. If you genuinely did something wrong, by all means, but if you didn't, don't claim responsibility for something you didn't do! Here is a good stock response: "I understand where you're coming from, and see how that would be frustrating."

This acknowledges their feelings, which is an important step in deescalation. Even assholes often just want to be heard and validated. However, we are not done. IF the asshole doesn't deflate after having their feelings soothed, you'll need to move onto Step 2. (You can also lead right into Step 2 if this is all through email or Teams.)

Step 2: State Need for Professionalism — In this step you both stand up for yourself, and make it explicitly clear what your intentions are, in a way that cannot be misconstrued. Here is a stock phrase: "I feel that this conversation has become a bit heated. I ask that we remain polite and professional for the remainder of this discussion."

Using "I feel" language removes any chance that the coworker can say you accused them of anything. You aren't insinuating that they're crazy or anything like that, but rather just saying that your perception is that this conversation is heated. You are also asking for polite professionalism, which is an expectation of the workplace, but in such a way that it CANNOT be twisted into an accusation (but that YOU know is commentary on your coworker, and your coworker will understand as well, without being able to use it against you).

But we're still not done! If they continue to bluster and storm, Step 3 has got you.

Step 3: End the Convo, Involve Higher-Up — In this step you both disengage the rude coworker, and cover your ass (CYA). Here is a stock phrase: "Apologies, but I do not feel that continuing this conversation will be productive for either of us. I will see if we can resume this conversation with [manager / HR] present. Good day."

Saying that you don't feel the conversation is productive communicates the message that they are not communicating effectively, but once again in a way that cannot be twisted into an attack on their person. Furthermore, "productive" carries the connotation that YOU are interested in working with this person, which will look good to whichever higher-up you involve next.

Because at this point, you DO need to involve one. This is to CYA. Controlling the narrative is crucial in workplace disputes and that means being the first to report the situation. Pick whoever is most appropriate; if you and the coworker share a manager, you can go there. If not, HR would be the better bet. Even if you share a manager, you can still go to HR if you trust them more. It's up to you.

If this confrontation took place in person, walk away after saying this and go to either manager / HR to explain the situation. If the coworker tries to stop you, just repeat that you don't feel the conversation is productive and request that they move out of your way. Such a thing will attract attention, so it's important you seem as reasonable as possible while they make themselves look worse.

If this confrontation took place over email, immediately forward with an explanation of what they will be looking at. Here is a good template:

"Hi [Manager / HR name],

I wanted to bring to your attention a conversation [Coworker] and I just had, in case it has potential for further issues to arise. The conversation was initially about [situation], however, I feel that [Coworker]'s language was disrespectful and not conducive to a working relationship. I would appreciate it if you would review the situation and speak to [Coworker] on my behalf, since I do not wish for this incident to escalate further. Every email between [Coworker] and myself is included in the chain below.

Thank you,

[Your Name]"

This template accomplishes several things:

It alerts the manager / HR person to the fact that there is an issue.

Provides context as to why the issue happened.

Does not seem accusatory toward the coworker; accusations will work against you 9 times out of 10.

Places emphasis on wanting to maintain professionalism and productivity, which are things both managers and HR people also want.

Asks M / HR to take over the situation.

Provides the full conversation (i.e. the RECEIPTS) so they can see what went down.

By this point you might be thinking, "These sound like robot responses! Why do I need to include lines about professionalism and productivity? Why do I need to weasel around accusations?"

The reason to all of these is: this is how you both play and win the game. You're not in this to dunk on your rude coworker; you're in it to shut them down. And the way to do that is to be clear, specific, and get / keep management and HR on your side. That means getting to them first, and keeping yourself sounding reasonable in contrast to your asshole coworker. Stating intentions clearly means your words can't be used against you; using words like professionalism and productivity will make M / HR believe you really care about this workplace.

This is how you win. Trust me. (Source: Master's in communications management, mid-level managerial experience, and over a decade of experience deescalating and dealing with assholes in the workplace.)

Tips and ideas for how to respond when someone is being rude to you

For personal reasons I won't get into, I have a history of just freezing when some is rude / hostile / aggressive / condescending / patronizing / etc. It's obviously not something I'm happy about at all, most people who freeze or fawn aren't happy about it and would change it if they could.

One day I confided in my co-worker, a middle aged woman in her 50's, that this is something I struggle with. Considering how confident and assertive she always struck me as, I was shocked when she told me this is also something she's struggled with.

The advice she gave me is to just memorize and practice a few broad statements or reactions that you can pull out of your pocket so to speak when someone is being rude or disrespectful to you. It's not easy if you're someone who's been conditioned to freeze or fawn, but practice helps. Practice saying these things when you're alone. Put up a sticky note next to your bed or on your bathroom mirror with these phrases and practice them when you see them. Practice saying these with a partner or trusted friend, role-play scenarios where you might need to use these phrases.

Here's a few phrases that have worked for me. The nice thing about them is that they tend to shut down the situation rather than escalating, while still letting the aggressor know that you don't find their behavior acceptable.

"Are you okay?"

This works well in professional settings, because it's not like your work place's residential bully can run to HR about you asking if they're okay (but they might if you try to retaliate and give them a taste of their own medicine). However, it still effectively sends the message "I think there's something wrong with your behavior and don't accept it". It's also not likely the response they're expecting, so it'll likely throw them off and prevent further verbal aggression.

"Could you repeat that for me? I didn't catch what you said."

This one is most effective for people you believe to actually have a conscious and might regret what they said if they actually thought about it a little more. I find that often when I do this one, when people repeat the rude/snippy/patronizing/etc thing they either shamefully stumble over their words and show some remorse, or they change altogether what they say. In the off chance they don't regret what they said and end up repeating exactly what they said, this at least buys you some time to think of a better reaction since you're no longer caught off guard by a sudden rude and snippy remark.

"Can you explain what you mean by that?"

Similar logic to the last one. Often when people are being rude/snippy/patronizing/etc they're caught up in their own emotions in that moment and didn't think it through. This is a polite and civil way of putting their rude behavior in the spotlight and making them reconsider what they said. The other advantage to this one is that in case you did misread their intentions and they meant no harm by what they said or did, this gives them an opportunity to clarify that, instead of you just feeling bad over a statement or actions they actually had no ill intentions with.

If anyone has any further examples of reactions / responses / statements that have worked for them, I'd love to hear about them. I'm new to studying the art of how to civilly yet effectively shut down bad behavior from others, so I'm always open to hearing more suggestions.

[xinganhao]

confession is not flashy 🩺 chan x reader.

or: you and dr. lee chan are basically just idiots in love. inspired by hospital playlist; title is from the song of the same name. happy chan day!

Attending Physician: Dr. Xu Minghao Patients: Dr. Lee Chan & You Observations:

Symptoms of mutual but unspoken affection persist.

Prolonged eye contact during case discussions, lasting an unnecessary yet telling 3-5 seconds.

Dr. Lee instinctively prepares coffee for you without being asked, despite denying any special treatment.

Notable verbal deflection whenever questioned about their relationship.

Displays of concern disguised as professional courtesy (e.g., Dr. Lee personally ensuring you eat, rest, and do not collapse mid-rounds).

Recommended course of action: One of them should just confess already, for the sake of department-wide sanity.

Resident Physician: Dr. Wen Junhui Patients: Dr. Lee Chan & You Observations:

Case of Chronic Emotional Avoidance detected.

You express concern for Dr. Lee’s well-being through passive-aggressive texts about eating habits.

Dr. Lee responds with deadpan humor, but follows every "I'm fine" with immediate compliance to your requests.

They speak in a shorthand no one else understands. Attempted to decipher once— resulted in a headache.

Dr. Lee shows clear signs of prioritizing your needs over his own, despite claiming you are “just a colleague” (False. You are the colleague).

Prognosis: Terminal pining. Unlikely to resolve without external intervention.

Chief Resident: Dr. Kwon Soonyoung Patients: Dr. Lee Chan & You Observations:

Patient zero (Dr. Lee) exhibits severe Protective Instincts toward you. Symptoms include unsolicited coffee deliveries, offering rides home, and giving up his only break to check on your patients.

You pretend not to notice, but also texts him first for help, second opinions, and snacks.

High likelihood of unconscious hand brushes.

Their "professional discussions" sound suspiciously like flirting in medical terminology.

Peer review suggests that every attending and resident has already placed bets on how long this will last.

Urgent recommendation: Immediate intervention required before the entire hospital loses its patience.

Final Diagnosis: Two highly competent doctors suffering from acute emotional repression, ongoing for years. Treatment options include forced confrontation or accidental confession under duress (i.e., a high-stakes surgery, excessive caffeine consumption, or a department-wide drinking session where Dr. Lee Chan can finally admit he has loved you from the moment he met you).

› scroll through all my work ദ്ദി ˉ͈̀꒳ˉ͈́ )✧ ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁 .ᐟ my masterlist | @xinganhao

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

Hi, I hope this is an okay question to ask. I am s l o w l y exploring and learning what kinds of kinks I like. I’m drawn to taboo kinks and I’m really curious about ageplay, but I’m worried that if I open the door to letting that be hot, I’m going to start seeing actual kids as hot. Obviously that doesn’t mean I would do anything about it, but I’m still not sure I want that in my head. Is there any truth in this fear? Could that happen?

well much in the same way that the majority of pup players aren't trying to hump real labradors on the street, D&D players generally aren't running around pulling swords on random shopkeepers, and my years doing Warriors Cats rp online never made me want to live in the woods pissing in the dirt and eating mice, I suspect that what you're attracted to is the safety of fantasy and play rather than the actual, literal thing. pretty big line between those two things, actually, and most people are pretty clear on the difference between stuff that's made up and harmless and stuff that's really really bad. I use this example often, but I assure you that my abiding love of Batman using his billions of dollars to dick around doing lawless bullshit has not softened my feelings on Elon Musk in the slightest.

I assume that, like most well-adjusted adults, you aren't attracted to children. what you're into is, presumably, adults acting in ways that are characterized as immature, carefree, cutesy, helpless, bratty, etc, and the dynamic of those playacting adults might have with others who take the role of their caregivers. that is... so, so, so far removed from being attracted to an actual human child. I don't know if you've ever actually, like, hung out with kids, but they're pretty different than adults. I mean obviously they're little humans who have their own opinions and ideas and personalities and have a right to autonomy and making their own decisions as much as is safely possible, but they are REALLY different from age appropriate, sexually compatible adults. someone doing ageplay is, like, a million miles from an actual kid.

it's kind of like how when Riverdale was on I'd see gifs of that insane redheaded lesbian and go "yeah, she's hot." like, sure, the character's a teenager, but that actress is an adult woman who's only two years younger than me and we all know that. the idea of fucking an actual teenager is vile. even if I were to see someone and have an initial aesthetic appreciation, the second they open their mouth and start saying 17 year old things the attraction is gone because I've realized that's a child.

(no offense to the teens in the room! you're great and I'm sure your 17 year old stuff is really important to you! but adults should not want to fuck you, is the point.)

so what I'm saying is: seems unlikely!

also, okay. let's assume the absolute worst case scenario happens and you experience a twinge of sexual interest towards a child. that's understandably alarming; that's not an urge most people want to harbor within themselves. that may require some dialing back from ageplay, or a chat with a kink-friendly mental health professional, or seeking out some community and advice from others in your kink scene who may have struggled with something similar. but please, give yourself some credit: you have some shred of impulse control within your body, yes? you're not going to make the leap from having a thought to being an active child predator in one fell swoop. the choice to harm a child, or to seek out pornographic material of child sexual abuse, are still choices that you would have to actually make. and it's making those choices to do harm that actually make child abusers a danger, not just having thoughts. having a thought all by itself doesn't hurt anyone; it's the way you act on it that has the potential to cause harm.

but again, I want to emphasize, sexual behavior is by and large a pretty easy wire not to get crossed with other things. please note the brave billions of people who manage to get through every day without groping their colleagues and random strangers because they understand it's not the appropriate time, place, or partner!

[justanothermemestrider]

40k Nsfw Alphabet - Ferrus Manus x F! Reader

Aaaaaand now, a return to regular programming.

I'm kicking off with a request I've gotten from a few people: the big metal caveman himself Ferrus Manus.

Apologies for spelling and grammar errors, as well as lore inaccuracies. Also I'm taking requests rn, so please let me know in the comments, reblogs, my dms or my asks.

Hope you guys enjoy!

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

In my opinion, Ferrus Manus is damned good at aftercare. He's not a master by any means (he's no Vulkan or Sangy lol), but he's got the competency and he's got the desire to make you feel comforted and cared for. That being said, he's still going to go about it like an Iron Hand: mechanically and efficiently.

When the act is complete and you two are lying in bed after, be prepared to be bombarded with questions: how are you feeling? Are you comfortable? Do you need a glass of water? Do you want him to hold you? If the answer to the latter is yes, how do you want to be held? Big spoon? Little spoon? Traditional embrace?

All of these things, Ferrus asks and executes for you with an earnest, almost grim seriousness that you find deeply amusing.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

He loves your hands because they are everything his are not: soft, gentle, warm and tender. He loves it when you cradle his cheeks, claw into his chest when you're riding him and cling to his back when he's on top.

Favourite parts of his body are probably his shoulders and chest for the reasons mentioned up above.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

Ferrus doesn't like making a mess, and his favourite place to finish is deep inside you. But, if you were to ask him to finish somewhere else for your own pleasure or enjoyment, he'd happily oblige.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

This man is a bottom. A massive, submissive bottom. On similar vibes to Guilliman and Dorn, Ferrus finds being a strong, immovable rock of a Primarch very exhausting. So, behind closed doors, with the women who loves him most, he likes being able to let that persona go.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

Ferrus has no first hand experience, but after getting together with you, he made it his mission to get educated. He didn't want to disappoint you, and he was also (internally) anxious about making a fool of himself.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

Any position where you're on top. As mentioned earlier, this man is a bottom. He was you taking the lead.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

Deadly serious. All the time. Every time. The seriousness is cranked up to 120%

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

Ferrus is the 2nd hairest Primarch after Leman Russ. Not just downstairs, but his chest, back and everywhere else (except his arms, obviously). Unlike Russ, though, Ferrus keeps his hair very well groomed.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

It will take a bit of time, but eventually I see Ferrus becoming one of the more emotionally intimate primarchs. In the HH books, his entire arc is his relearning the importance of emotionality, the "strength to be gentle" so to speak. Being in a relationship with you would accelerate that arc, leading to him becoming a surprisingly romantic man. He's still stoic and stern, of course, that's his personality after all. But underneath that is an inherently compassionate heart that, eventually, becomes capable of great and deep love.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

The necrodermis covering his hands and arms makes masterbating super uncomfortable for poor Ferrus. If he's got urges, he needs either a toy or you in order to satiate them.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

The aforementioned submissiveness includes a little bit of bondage if Ferrus is feeling particularly stressed out or worn down.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

Your shared bedroom- it's a matter of efficiency and effectiveness. The bed is the most comfortable for you, everything you both need to pleasure each other is all there, and there's absolutely no chance of you being interrupted or walked in on.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

Any physical advances or teases on your part has Ferrus feeling hopelessly aroused. An embrace from behind, a hand on his knee that slowly traces up to his inner thigh. Anything like that gets this man flustered and hard almost instantly.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Anything that involves hurting (pretending or otherwise), degrading or overpowering you. Blood, violence and brutality are part of his job, he doesn't want to bring any of that into the bedroom.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

He far prefers to give and he's HELLA good at it. He's basically perfected the technique. The reason for this is because he knows he can't use his hands (or at least, he doesn't feel comfortable using them), because the risk of hurting you is way to high.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

Slow and sensual. Ferrus doesn't want to hurt you, doesn't want to risk being rough lest he grip you too hard with his metal hands or hurt you with his enormous size and weight. He prefers it when you set the pace; he will only go as fast or as rough as you are.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

While Ferrus prefers taking his time with you, he's not against quickies. And he's damned good at them, too. He is efficient, after all. Efficient and effective. Whether you've got two minutes with him or two hours, Ferrus is making you finish.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

Ferrus isn't much of a risk taker. He knows what works for him and what works for you and he doesn't really see the point is changing that. Very much a "if it ain't broke, don't fix it" kinda mindset.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

Typical Primarch stamina. All night, all day, as many rounds as you can physically endure.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

Ferrus is 100% into the idea of toys, both your use of them and his own. If you ask him, he'll even forge some for you ;)

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Ferrus isn't a tease at all. If he wants you, he's gonna tell you explicitly, in the most direct, clunky and verbose way possible.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

The first few times you sleep together, Ferrus is pretty modest with his noises; panting and grunting, primarily. But, as he grows more comfortable, he'll get loud. Quite loud.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

Part of the reason why, before the Istvaan 3, Ferrus had resolved to find a way to remove the necrodermis from his hands, is because he wants to be able to touch you properly. With his own skin, not alien metal. Good thing he made it back from Istvaan safe and sound and with his head intact, right?

Right?

Guys?

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

E N O R M O U S. Only Primarch whose bigger is Vulkan. Nothing more, your honour.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

Not that high. His own desire, Ferrus keeps on a fairly short leash. Both because of his personality, but also so he can focus entirely on his missions. However, if you need to be satisfied, he'll drop everything to give you what you need.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

Ferrus is never asleep before you. Ever. Not until he's absolutely certain you are comfortable, safe and have had all your needs tended to.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Taglist: @solspina @beckyninja @egrets-not-regrets @wolf-feathers12 @jaghatai-khock @lemon-russ @moodymisty @hatsubara-8chan @nereidof40k @yanagikou @fyxestroll @yurihasurunbara @justfreakynothingelse @mooniequeen

[communist-hatsunemiku]

this might be a strange take but as someone who was groomed and who had what i would call an "elitist" mindset towards it, zako really seemed like it was about that mentality. of knowing you were playing with fire but feeling like you were above it. and for that i was really attached to it for the 2 hours it was out. the more logical side of me KNOWS its more likely a play off mimukawa nice try but i would love to believe it was meant to cater to a different audience than loli-cons. what's your take on the fiction vs reality of it? do you think westerners are just overreacting

I think you're interpretation of the song is valid, and pretty interesting tbh! I had not thought about that at all, and it's a case for letting people interpret the song in their own way. Instead of kowtowing to the loudest, most offended people. I also think the fact the creators literally took down the song amid backlash is pretty strong evidence they didn't make a song "for lolicons". They obviously did not anticipate this reaction, Channel admitted to having reservations, and tried to make Yuuki somewhat older-looking in the video. Whether you think she does or not, is up for (good faith!) debate. I do think she does not look like the literal box art version of the character, but that's kind of beside the point.

there is no fiction vs. reality debate because there are no real human beings harmed in the making of this song. Like, full stop. The "well kaai yuuki has a child VA" shit doesnt hold water cuz that person is an adult now anyway, and there are plenty of other songs featuring her that go wayyyy beyond this one. Like it's just something people reached for out of convienence. Same for "it violates her TOS!" like no one gave a fuck about Kaai Yuuki's TOS before it became a convenient cudgel in this particular situation.

The thing is, no one can have conversations about stuff like this in good faith because you are immediately labeled some kind of monster for trying to have any kind of nuanced opinion. Any dissent from "this song/movie/book is irredeemably evil and your sick for defending it" is taken as proof that you are a pervert monster. It's such a clear example of people, willfully and gleefully, diving into reactionary thinking without a shred of thought.

When really, I do think having an actual conversation about lolicon causing you discomfort is totally normal, and it's a pretty reasonable response to this stuff! But people can't just say that, they have to burn the whole thing to the ground, in the name of "protecting kids" or whatever bullshit they come up with. I don't actually like a good portion of Miku art for the same reasons people didn't like Zako! There was art going around on twitter of Miku with a literal binkie in Her mouth like a baby, and that shit was kind of weird! But I just didn't engage with it, that's it. People whipped each other up about the "harms" of this song, when simply not liking or engaging with it at all would have been the normal thing to do.

Freak outs like this do not protect anybody from anything. My big hot take is that having a moral panic about literally anything has more potential for actual harm than whatever it is people are panicking over. You simply cannot make rational, thoughtful decisions that prioritize protecting people from abuse when you are in a panic, or listening to people who are in a panic. You just can't!! It's not how shit works!

I know I have other asks about this, but I'm kind of trying to answer here, definitively, and let the topic dissipate. I'm glad I got the video downloaded, and we'll see what they release to appease all the weirdos who freaked out about the song. People objected to both the video and the lyrics themselves, so I don't know how they're going to come out with a new version that isn't radically different than the original. We'll see.

[loafysainz]

His Mistress | CS 55

carlos sainz x fem!reader

warn: mdni, possessive, harsh carlos, cheating

please do not read it uf youre not into dark fic!

Carlos Sainz had it all. The last name, the wealth, the looks, the charm. His family owned one of the largest automotive empires in the world, and Carlos? He was their golden boy—successful in his own right, running his own business in the same industry. Everyone loved him. The media adored him, his parents were proud, and people saw him as this picture-perfect man—humble, respectful, and effortlessly charismatic.

And now, with the news of his engagement to Rebecca, an insanely gorgeous and world-renowned model, the public’s obsession with him only grew stronger. Power couple, they called them. A match made in heaven. Everyone was convinced Carlos had the perfect life.

Everyone, except one person.

Y/N.

Because unlike the rest of the world, Y/N knew who Carlos Sainz truly was.

And she knew, because she was the secret he kept locked away.

No one else knew about the luxurious house tucked away in the hills, far from the noise of the city. No one else had ever seen the woman who lived inside. A woman so stunning, so unreal in her beauty, that Carlos had never been able to let go. He met her years ago when she worked as his personal assistant, and from the moment their eyes met, he knew. There was something about her—something addictive, something he wanted to keep to himself.

So he did.

Y/N hadn’t stepped out of this house in years. Not because she couldn’t, but because Carlos wouldn’t let her. No one else got to see her. No one else got to have her.

She was his.

—

Carlos stormed into the house that night, his jaw tight, his patience worn thin.

He had just come from a family meeting—one where his parents and Rebecca’s team had gone over details for his wedding. His future. As if he even gave a shit about any of it. He hated the idea of marriage. Hated feeling trapped.

And now? He needed an escape.

Needed her.

The moment he saw Y/N standing there, he crossed the room in three long strides, grabbing her wrist and pulling her into him. She barely had time to breathe before his lips crashed onto hers, his hands gripping her like he needed to remind himself that she was real. That she was still here, still his.

And she let him. Because what else could she do?

The room was silent after. Only the sound of their heavy breaths remained, mingling in the space between them. Carlos was still lying beside her, his arm draped lazily over her bare waist when his phone buzzed on the nightstand.

Rebecca.

He exhaled sharply, grabbing the phone and unlocking it.

She had sent a series of messages, asking for his opinion on which wedding gown to wear.

Carlos barely glanced at the options before passing the phone to Y/N. “Reply to her,” he muttered.

Y/N hesitated, staring at the screen.

“Now.” His voice was sharp, leaving no room for argument.

Her fingers trembled slightly as she typed out a response, picking a gown at random.

Moments later, Rebecca called.

Carlos didn’t even hesitate before answering, his voice soft, sweet, nothing like the man who had just pinned Y/N down minutes ago.

“Hi, cariño,” Rebecca’s voice chirped through the speaker. “I’m so happy you picked this gown. It’s my favorite too.”

Carlos forced a small chuckle, eyes flicking to Y/N. She was staring at the ceiling, trying not to react.

After a few more seconds of Rebecca’s excited chatter, the call ended.

The second the screen went dark, the temperature in the room shifted. Carlos turned his head, his gaze dark, sharp, cutting straight through Y/N like a blade.

“What gown did you pick?” His voice was eerily calm.

Y/N swallowed, then slowly showed him the picture.

Silence.

Then, “Why did you pick that one?”

She hesitated, then spoke, her voice barely above a whisper. “It’s… beautiful.”

Carlos let out a dry laugh. A humorless, mocking sound.

His fingers tilted her chin up, forcing her to meet his gaze. “Did you pick it because you like it?” His voice was lower now, almost a whisper. “Did you think about yourself in it?”

Her breath hitched.

“Did you think,” Carlos continued, his grip tightening, “that one day you could wear a dress like this?”

Y/N’s lips parted, but no words came out.

A smirk tugged at the corner of his lips, though there was no warmth behind it. He leaned in, voice dripping in something cold, something final.

“Never.”

His thumb brushed over her bottom lip, almost gently. Almost.

“You don’t get to dream about that, cariño. You don’t get to think about a life where you wear a dress like that.” His voice was sharp now, biting. “You belong here. With me. And only me.”

A single tear slipped down Y/N’s cheek.

Carlos watched it fall, his expression unreadable.

And then he kissed her again—slow, deep, claiming.

As if sealing a promise.

As if reminding her—

That no matter what, no matter who the world thought he was, no matter how perfect he seemed—

She would always be his best-kept secret.

[hyuny-bunny]

seasons // series

part vii

summary: Minho is determined to be the one to win your heart.

warnings: sweat (?), panic attack symptoms (hyperventilating)

part vi • masterlist

"Hey, look at me," Jisung says as he grabs your face. You were beginning to hyperventilate after seeing the look on Minho's face.

"Jisung I-"

"Stop, just breathe, okay, close your eyes," He held your face as you focused on every breath count.

Why did the idea of these two crossing paths make you so anxious and uncomfortable? Minho had been around your ex's before, even going as far as trying to befriend them for your sake. So, why was this any different? After your heart rate began to level, Jisung pulled you into a hug rubbing your back soothingly as he called someone. It was only a few moments after, you picked up you head to see the puppy faced boy who was the 2nd person closest to you.

Seungmin took the seat on your on the side of you before ruffling your hair.

"What's wrong?" He asked sympathetically. Even his voice was enough to ground you in something.

You gave him the run down of saturday morning's argument with Minho, then going out and meeting Hyunjin, going home with Hyunjin, to now sitting outside the dance studio where the two have crossed paths.

Seungmin doesn't shame you or even scold you but he does lightly bump his fist to your head making you let out a strained laugh.

"Why are you so worried about this? Is Hyunjin a bad guy?"

"No... he's actually a really sweet guy, even for an alpha.."

"Okay, and how is this situation any different then when you were dating someone else?"

You stop for a moment thinking with pursed lips.

"I guess it's... not? I just... you didn't see the look on Minho's face, he looked like I had just murdered his cat."

"That's a bit extreme," Seungmin says with a chuckle as he fixes a strand of hair from your face. "Either way, who you sleep with or don't sleep, whether he knows or doesn't, is your choice and only you for you to judge. If you say he's a good guy, then trust yourself."

He was right. Why should you be so afraid of what Minho thought? As much as you valued his opinion as a friend, it was just as much you're right to sleep with whoever and whenever as you were single, not tied down to anyone. You lay your head on Seungmins shoulder for a moment.

"I should've told you everything yesterday but I knew you were busy with-"

"I am never too busy for you, okay? Call, text, send Jisung to my door with a message from you- actually don't do that I don't want him at my place," Seungmin says as his face scrunches in disgust at Jisung who sits next to you about to protest.

The two banter back and forth for a moment making you laugh, feeling lighter about everything. They keep you company until the others emerge from their dance class.

-

Jeongin yapped Hyunjin's ear off in those 10 minutes they had for a break as Felix shielded his face in hands. He could feel Minhos eyes throwing daggers at Hyunjin's head.

Hyunjin had learned in those 10 minutes that Minho and you had been friends since childhood, with Minho having had a crush on you long before you presented as an omega and him as an alpha. He couldn't help but wonder why the two of you didn't ever get together. As far as he could tell, the two of you seemed a likely match. While he did know Minho well enough to pass judgement, it was clear the Alpha had an affinity for taking care of the people around him, even if it was as simple as helping someone get a dance move down correctly or making sure no one was too worn down.

Even the bite in the way he joked was so similar to you, it was playful and harmless but could be taken very different if aimed at the right person. There was no denying how good looking he was either. From his build and stature despite not being very tall, there was an energy about him that asserted that dominance intentional or not.

Hyunjin had decided it was best to not let Minho on any further information about the nature of your relationship. If Minho wanted to know anything then he would have to ask you.

The class continued on for another hour, if Minho went back to his cool and collect facade for the remainder of class. Felix watched every movement for Minho waiting for the moment he snapped but he never did. Once the class was over, students trickled out slowly until it was just Jeongin, Hyunjin, Minho and Felix.

As much as it hurt Minho to do this, he couldn't deny the talent that Hyunjin had. The two exchanged numbers so they could work on a possible separate choreography to film. Hyunjin kept his cool so long as Minho did. As the four of them began to make their way to the door, Minho's stomach turned at the idea of facing you.

When he saw you sitting on that bench beside Jisung and Seungmin, it seemed to all melt away. You held out an electrolyte bottle to Minho who gleefully took it. Hyunjin trotted behind him with a smile on his face.

"I'd hug you but I'm soaked in sweat," Hyunjin said as he stood in front of you.

"Oh it's fine don't worry about it! So, uh, I'm guessing I don't have to introduce you two to each other?" You ask looking between Minho and Hyunjin.

"We're pretty well acquainted now," Minho says a bit stiff but Hyunjin just laughs. You attempt to change the topic.

"How come you didn't tell me you were a dance major?" You asked nervously looking between Minho and him.

"You never asked," Hyunjin shrugs as he drinks his water, "I'm not a dance major though."

Minho, Felix and Jeongin cock their head in confusion. He laughs at their reactions before speaking again, "I'm an illustratrative art major, painting is more my forte but dancing is my outlet."

Felix chimes in, "Was that tattoo your design then?"

"What tattoo?" You ask confused but Hyunjin just lets out a soft laugh as he nods to answer Felix's question.

Hyunjin puts his bag down to peel his shirt up revealing the rose tattoo the starts between his shoulder blades and trails down further beneath the fabric in vines and thorns. Unconsciously you reach out to touch it which makes Hyunjin shiver and takes everything in Minho to not rip your hand away.

"I didn't see this before," You murmur in awe of the space it takes up on his back.

"Kinda hard to with when you were preoccupied with other things," Hyunjin says with a wolfish grin as he pulls his shirt back on as he watches the flush creep onto your cheeks and watching you awkwardly laugh.

Minho clears his throat grabbing your wrist abruptly, "We should get going, have somewhere to be in a few but we'll see you guys on wednesday."

"Minho, we don't have anything-"

"Yes, we do, remember." He says through clenched teeth before continuing to drag you away from the group.

"Still on for Friday?" Hyunjin's calls out as he watches the Alphas drag you away.

"Yes!" You shout from over your shoulder as Minho throws his arm around your shoulder to keep you from looking back.

Hyunjin watches feeling satisfied by successfully getting under Minho's skin. He bids his goodbye to the others but before he does Felix runs up to him asking to exchange numbers, you know, incase co-captain things come up. Hyunjin is more than happy to exchange numbers with the pretty blonde omega as he bids goodbye for the last time.

-

"This is the urgent business you were talking about?" You ask sarcastically as you sit in the quiet boba shop booth with Minho across from you.

It was your normal hangout spot but it was also ritual for the two of you to come here every 1st day back of the new semester. It was a cat themed boba shop and it was truthfully one of Minho's favorite places to be, especially with you.

"Yes, they close at 8pm, I didn't want us to miss our chance... how were your classes today?" He asks looking up at you attempting to change the topic from his insistent ways of getting you as far away from Hyunjin as possible.

"Good, my professors are pretty nice. I'm writing my first novel this semester too."

"Will you read it to me when you're ready?" He asks.

"Of course, who else will I read it to?" He internally responds with a scowl at the thoughts of you reading it to Hyunjin.

The two of sit in a comfortable silence listening to the sounds of the people chattering around you.

"What are you doing with Hyunjin on Friday?" Minho is the first to speak up. Likely plotting how to disrupt those plans.

"Not too sure yet... How did you like him?" diverting the question back to Minho.

"Seems nice." He says shortly, unable to meet your gaze. He wouldn't admit that despite his flirty advances towards you, he liked him enough to consider him someone worth getting to know. You hum in acknowledgment. "The lunch you made me was good, thank you."

"You're welcome, nothing compares to your cooking but I try," You say as you stretch up in your seat feeling the exhaustion of the day wearing on you. Minho takes the signal and grabs both your belongings ready to head out.

The warm feeling that spread through your chest as you can't help feeling thankful how easy Minho picks up on your body language, almost better than you can. The drive to your apartment is quiet as the two of you talk about the coming day of other classes tomorrow.

"Oh that reminds me, Saturday night, are you free?" You perk up in your seat.

"I should be, something you want to do?"

"I promised Seungmin that we'd go to his nerdy film marathon, please come with me?" You ask jutting out your bottom lip, while giving him your best puppy eyes.

"Mmmmm what's in it for me?" Minho would say yes regardless but he wanted to see what you would say.

"I'll make your favorite cookies but... i'll make them into little cats." You say with a straight face.

"Deal." He mimics your face until he sees that smile on your face making his heart do a flip.

"Perfect, I'll see you tomorrow," You say quickly climb out of his car before he got a chance to say anything else.

He watches as walk off into your building waving back at him, meeting Hyunjin was like setting a fire under him. He was more determined than ever to get you to see him as someone who could be there for, love you, to be your mate. He would stop at nothing now to be the one that puts that smile on your face.

[plunderbunny]

Always feels so weird to be saying this because he's the dumb League of Legends spaghetti and meatballs guy, but videogamedunkey had some of the best comments about I've ever heard this in his "Game Critics" video, in which he says the the power of a critic comes from the consistency of their voice, not in you personally agreeing with everything that they say. Understanding the critic's thought process, their likes and dislikes, what they value and what annoys them, whether any of it is even rational or not, is what gives their review utilitarian value in terms of "the critic has X opinion about this thing, does that make me think I would like it dislike it?"

Beyond the most basic "does their opinion make me think I'd like this thing or not" level, the other really important thing about a critic is to challenge the audience's way of thinking about a work and get them to open their mind, broaden their horizons, stretch their brain a bit and think in new ways and from new perspectives. A review should never just be "this is good" or "this is bad", it should include actual ANALYSIS. And whether or not someone likes something isn't analysis, it's one END RESULT OF analysis.

Why is comparing a game to a completely different game a bad thing? Why is engaging with the game in a different way than the developers intended a bad thing? Why is playing and reviewing a game for which you're not the target audience a bad thing? Those all just sound to me like new, novel, challenging perspectives from which to evaluate and think about a game.

And if you don't agree with the reviewer, if they don't like what you do like or vice versa... Why is that a bad thing? You can think they're wrong! Sometimes disagreeing with someone who has a different perspective can be the most enlightening and intellectually stimulating kind of conversation about a media object! My favorite pieces of media analysis of all time, the various works of Elizabeth Sandifer, especially Tardis Eruditorum and Last War in Albion, are FULL of ideas and perspectives and tastes that I disagree with, but they are all FASCINATING to read about and discuss and consider. Just because she is a fan of the Matt Smith era of Doctor Who, which I hate, doesn't mean that her thoughts and opinions on it are pointless or uninteresting.

Like art itself, art criticism shouldn't exist just to validate your preconceptions, or comfort you and give you ask the simplest, most obvious pleasures possible. It should challenge you, make you think, confront you... That's what makes it interesting, and what makes it valuable! Too many people have the notion that art should always be slavishly trying to satisfy a pre-existing audience with known appetites and easily-scratched itches. Too much art ends up complacent on account of catering to those audiences.

More game critics should be like the first picture in this post, actually challenging conventional thought (whether or not they like the game) and thinking critically and from a wide range of perspectives, potentially from ones outside the target audience. The video game community needs another "this game really makes you feel like Spider-Man" reviewer (to steal another great dunkey quote) like it needs a hole in its head, or the equivalent, yet another competitive hero shooter or souls-like or comfy farm sim.

Criticism doesn't exist to validate your personal tastes.

Art doesn't exist to satisfy your personal appetites.

game reviewers are weird

[dellamortethelesser]

The Wigmaker Job

Notes and Thoughts - Part 1

pt1 | pt2 | pt3

This quickly grew out of hand so this is only covering the first scene lol. This is my attempt to organize my thoughts nearly line-by-line as I go through and analyze the relationship between Lucanis and Illario. These are my personal opinions and I'm open to discussion about any points I present here.

From the first time we are introduced to Illario from Lucanis's perspective, it is… almost derogatory? (dressed how an Antivan would think a Vint would dress). i thought you trusted him to handle this job at a party?

"it's a job" / "a party at a job" / "any excuse to primp" ← This back and forth feels natural between siblings (or those who have a sibling relationship) but with wider context feels… a little icky

Already, Illario is disparaging himself in relation to Lucanis ("Only 'the Great Lucanis Dellamorte' could refuse a summons from the First Talon") and even he says he's only here because Lucanis asked him to be. why bring him if you ostensibly don't trust him to handle the job? Lucanis's inner pov is different from how he speaks to and acts with Illario.

of course Illario is generally thick-skinned until it comes to Caterina. so are you. she's abused you both and treats Illario undoubtedly worse because he's not the favorite.

re: Caterina's abuse as listed. no food or water. beat them with her cane until their backs were scarred for 'letting their guard down' or 'fumbling footwork'. Lucanis says she "beat into him his commitment to his contracts" (re: veilguard banter where he didn't kill that 14 year old. lying? or proof of further favoritism?)

"For years, he'd hated her…" and then goes on to say that he'd learned that her cruelty was her way of ensuring their survival. Notably this isn't forgiveness but an acknowledgment of what she'd done and how it benefited them as assassins, which I would argue that it did. Child abuse is bad but I think she did prepare them both for the world they were being raised into as assassins.

"Beneath the bitterness in Illario's tone was something rotten." ← KEY LINE TO ME. Why point out how rotten it is unless he… already suspected Illario's resentment? Jealousy? He can identify the bitterness bc Caterina won't step aside, but also. ROTTEN.

"your time will come" / "will it?" ← Lucanis watching Illario watch him in the mirror. Really interesting moment because this is where Illario reminds him that Lucanis is the favorite. Lucanis goes on to say that he KNOWS this and has HEARD the rumors and still tries to assure Illario that his time would come.

"So, if she named you heir to House Dellamorte, you'd refuse?" ← really interesting thing to note here is that Illario is asking about being named as HEIR. Lucanis doesn't answer, they're interrupted, but "heir" doesn't hold the same weight as 'first talon".

they're not arguing who gets the role, they're arguing over who is even in line for it? so you mean to tell me that Caterina has been stringing them along like this… the whole time? Just name a fucking heir for fucks sake. the older one at least! if this was set up from childhood there would be way less room for jealousy and competition, or it would at least be clear WHO would be in line.. that being said I do believe she either did this on purpose. There's just no other excuse. Caterina what if you died the next day. they'd still have to fucking fight it out! (or maybe Lucanis would finally feel brave enough to absolve himself).

maybe that's it though? it's a test right? this whole fucking thing…. man.

"Illario's pretty-boy mask slipped as a coldness flooded his features." ← would have loved to see more of this in Veilguard. Regardless of whether you think Illario's writing is consistent between the books and the game, you're kidding yourself if you tell me he wasn't written operatically obvious in Veilguard. here there is more of a level of calculation and concealment? unless you want me to believe that his behavior was obvious to everyone except Lucanis… not discounting that reading of their relationship, just disagreeing with it personally.

Skipping ahead in to the fight scene, we see that Lucanis is living up to his name as the Mage-Killer as he pretty handily dispatches their assailant. Illario takes on more of the charmer role, tying up the mage—but then Lucanis immediately kills him. Why even let Illario do all of that work if you're just going to kill him?!

He even comments on it. "If I'd known you were just going to kill him, I wouldn't've put so much effort into the knots." ← Lucanis tells him after this to check his pockets and finds a note that does, admittedly, reveal the Venatori allegiance. That being said�� you still could've killed him and got the same note. Unless it was just because he was a mage? But he was already dazed at that point. Why waste the time?! It's so maddening. This is the first of many instances where Lucanis sort of… bulldozes over Illario.

As Lucanis is removing the blade—"Careful, remember the tanner job? You ruined my best shirt." Kind of prissy behavior (Illario takes two steps back away from the blood), but when his cousin protests, Lucanis just… smirks and continues to extract the blade. If I'm reading this generously it could be simple sibling-esque banter, but Lucanis is not the sort to be readily endearing himself to Illario at any point.

Illario remarks that the Venatori's fanaticism re: nationalism and theology regarding the Black City isn't "worth it" (so he doesn't like the Venatori much either, mark that down?).

Lucanis says that it's because Illario isn't "a true believer—except when it comes to coin". My first thought is to think of Zara Renata's corpse conversation in Veilguard when she remarks that what Illario wanted, he wanted more than power, family, coin, etc etc.

So Lucanis's perception is that Illario is the sort of man who'd do anything for money (as the House of Crows is KNOWN TO DO, YOU KILL PEOPLE. FOR MONEY), and it matches up with his opinions previously established in regards to Illario's dress, motivations, mannerisms, etc. That Illario is… kind of a pretty-boy charmer who is only worried about coin and good clothes.

Hm. All bodes well on the Cain & Abel front.

RE: the true believer statement. Worth pointing out that the House of Crows was first established by Andrastian monks in the hills outside of Treviso; they assassinated a duke. Would love to have learned more as to whether there was more religious influences in the guild at any point.

Quotes are either paraphrased or taken directly from The Wigmaker Job, written by Courtney Woods.

[transformers-spike]

I just wanted to ask what you thought TFP Ratchet, Wheeljack, Dreadwing, and Bulkhead were position wise in your mind. Like are they a top, a bottom, or a switch?

To me Dreadwing and Wheeljack are both tops. I fee like they both would really be into doming their partners. Wheeljack is kinky as hell so I can see him being into super freaky shit.

And I can see Dreadwing being a much stricter dom.

I see Ratchet and Bulkhead as switches personally.

Oh man, other than my typical "It depends on the situation" answer, let me think this through. Alright, so fyi I'm going to explain if they're a sub/dom, like being on top/being ridden, and if they enjoy getting their valves filled more than spiking (aka the Top/Bottom bit) Ratchet does enjoy being in control, but he's often pretty exhausted and starving, so it would be nice if you could take the reins without injuring yourself. He has some dom tendencies but is pretty mixed all things considered. He's happy being ridden or pegged in some way - but he's also just as eager to be on top and, if his partner allows it, use their dick/dildo as the world's smallest interface toy Bulkhead is a huge sub in my opinion. He prefers being ridden purely because it means he's less likely to accidentally injure his partner (dude chillll - you're doing fine). He's a lot more likely to let his human do as they please, he can adapt to just about anything. You can penetrate him too, he just doesn't feel as much unless you focus on his anterior node. His valve can take a good pounding, although sadly no human is capable of doing that

Wheeljack is rougher by comparison, a lot more willing to bruise his human in the heat of the moment. He's not afraid to push them to their limits, and he's just as eager to be used up. He's definitely the type to suggest you shove your entire arm in his valve. He doesn't care if he's on top or being ridden, he's going to find a way to be a bastard someway. He's an absolute brat even when he's in the dominant role, someone put him in his place Dreadwing (as I typically interpret him) adapts to his partner's behavior. He's typically more reserved but still capable of assuming a more dominant/strict role as we've seen in the show (channeling his inner squadron commander lol). If his partner's a brat and they like being manhandled, he's happy to do it (although carefully - he would hate to leave a mark). Otherwise, any position works for him - and he enjoys having his valve played with, which is way too sensitive for its own good

[acexsmhking]

TICCI TOBY WITH A THING FOR KNUCKLE RUBBING LORD I BEG THAT IS THE REQUEST

𝐀𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐬𝐥𝐲

(𝗮𝗱𝘃.) 𝗜𝗻 𝗮 𝗹𝗼𝘃𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗼𝗿 𝗿𝗼𝗺𝗮𝗻𝘁𝗶𝗰 𝘄𝗮𝘆

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ Toby relationship knacks

note: i actually just got done with a full sobbing breakdown so this ask genuinely made me giggle i love you😭😂

Warning(s): GN!Reader, fluff nothing else<3 kinda..

No cause Anon you’re so right, like idk about anyone else but I LOVE knuckle rubs just in general and Toby 100% rubs your knuckles. All of them!!

Especially that little knuckle bone on your wrist tho I guess that’s a wrist bone.. what the difference..

But omg Toby LOVES hands; he loves holding your hand, kissing your fingers, your palms, EVERYTHING!

Toby is a very very touchy grabby feely person like 98.99% of the time. Of course he has his moments where that depression or anxiety hits all of us and he just,.. cannot handle any human interaction

But trust! He is holding your hands, thumb rubbing your knuckles, occasionally bringing your hand up to kiss.

And Toby is actually very open about PDA. Toby doesn’t really care about other people’s opinions or feelings if it isn’t you.. Tim.. Brian.. and Kate. So. Like. Ya know.

He keeps it more PG around them but 100% expect that if Toby ever does wiggle his way into town with you to go shopping he will slap your ass no care

So yeah no one is like shocked by just HOW often he kisses your knuckles. And it’s a lot

Toby pretty much is always with you, sure he heads off for house chores and maintenance and food but other that Toby is with you the whole 24HRS.

So he just… holds your hand. It’s really great actually. Toby doesn’t sweat, and he’s pretty chill not necessarily cold. So like it’s weirdly comfortable and satisfying to hold his hand

Sometimes he’ll hold your hand in his mouth if he’s doing something but still wants some body part of yours

We love the little cutie patootie

Toby 100% is the kinda guy that holds your hand when you guys have sex. I mean it, he loves it. He craves it. It’s just so.. close and intimate like those sappy old adult movies

*sobs*

Not to mention if YOU kiss his knuckles? Yeah he feels his heart tingle; back flipping, doing the tango. Toby is a very big emotion feeler. He feels rather intensely a majority of the time

Like he will break down crying holding your face telling you how much he loves you…

Me with my dog

But he is just a sucker for love. Don’t get me wrong, yes Toby has his moments, and his flaws, and lingering issues. But at the end of the day it genuinely is.. exhausting. And Toby isn’t just some emotionally stupid person he’s stupidly smart if anything lol

Especially canonically

And sometimes after eating a family of five, with your weird demon friend and masked adoptive mom you just wanna go home to your beloved and hold hands

Nothing wrong with that..

Omg going on dates Toby 100% holds your hand across the table. I don’t make the rules

(Ok sure your dates are always at home or the picnic table he built for you but it still counts)

He also LOVEEES how your hands feel, especially that soft skin one your knuckles. He had very very worked hands and just lovessss the differences in textures it itches something in his brain

Ride him, hold his hands as you bounce he will get you pregnant. Sucks if your a guy or mtf he don’t give a fuck. m!preg bitch take that

All in all. While Toby is 99.98% of the time a chaotic bundle of cannibalism, weird morals, demon possession and neurodivergence when he’s with you his only the neurodivergent and chaos LMAO

someone draw Toby kissing some hands<3

: ̗̀➛ Thank you again for this ask I have actually been so stupidly stressed today and this made me feel better. I promise Deer anon and other anon I am working on your requests too!! Just well tumblr decided not to save half the progress LMAO deer anon yours should come out tomorrow! — Ace

[undeadslayerr]

I think I get what you mean. I guess since I don't really experience transphobia in the way that people would attack me on the street for looking gnc or trans, I'd rather assume transphobia is less pervasive. This example you gave makes me really understand the whole point better.

those who stay silent are complicit in transphobia, even if they gender us correctly and are generally polite to us.

I guess since most people just don't have much of an opinion about trans issues at all, I'd assume they aren't transphobic. You're right that it may be the opposite.

Society itself is definitely transphobic, and is for sure constructed in a misogynistic and transphobic way. And because of it, I agree that a lot of people are definitely made to be transphobic. But I'm of the opinion that if detached from that influence, most people wouldn't really mind anyone trans. I guess that doesn't make them not transphobic per se.

I'm gonna go on a more personal tangent now to explain my perspective a bit more. You don't have to read it if you dgaf lol, it really doesn't matter much.

For example, I had a doctor appointment very recently. I outed myself as trans to the doctor. Basically the situation was:

I was there under my deadname to make everything medical easier. During the medical exam she noticed excessive body hair and asked if I'm under a doctor's care regarding any hormone imbalances, since it looks like I could have excessive testosterone. I sheepishly explained that it's intended, because I'm trans and taking testosterone.

She wasn't grossed out or rude or anything. She asked for my chosen name and referred to me by it. She switched my pronouns when she was speaking halfway through the visit. She congratulated me, said I look masculine and HRT is clearly working, and said she's happy people today can be who they wanna be.

At first she had trouble referring to me by the correct pronouns, but she corrected herself very quickly. I bet she must have some transphobic worldviews. Maybe she was, at some point, transphobic to someone else. But I don't think any of that is malicious. I think she doesn't want to be transphobic. Maybe even as much as me, who's actually a part of the trans community. I think she's uneducated and clueless about the stuff that just doesn't affect her as much.

And I think, because of that, I'd rather just not assume transphobia. I think I'll still approach people with the mindset of "not transphobic until proven otherwise", just for my own peace of mind I guess. I feel like people who are not transphobic can be educated, while transphobes don't even hear you out.

I think you're right though, in the way that transphobia is much more varied and prevalent than just physical violence in the streets. And a lot of people, including myself, can still hold transphobic worldviews they were taught, and just overall be transphobic, even if unintended. I think the problem I have with this, is how unclear it really all is in practice. Sexism, racism, transphobia and homophobia often intersect, not mentioning the fact that some people are just bigots for sport. At what point does being uneducated stop and being malicious start?

Overall it's a complex issue and I appreciate the explanation!! I know, despite the fact that I'm trans, I don't really know everything about trans issues, so I see a lot of value in dialogues like this. :))

why do people assume celebrities are not transphobic by default? we live in a deeply transphobic world. many of the "basic facts about the world" we are taught as children are fully transphobic lies. i don't get why, when people like a celebrity, they write a little fictional biography in their head about how they're probably not transphobic (despite the fact that, mathematically, most people totally transphobic, especially people of class celebrities belong to). like why? why just assume that people in this deeply transphobic world are progressive trans allies by default without any kind of evidence?

[utilitycaster]

Forgive me if you've already been asked something on this topic, but I was curious about your opinions re: Laudna's epilogue. Specifically, about how her lifeforce and aging is now tied to Imogen's in a 'marriage' ceremony even though they've only been dating for a few weeks in-game. It felt like an extension of the flaws baked into her entire arc that Laudna bound her soul to yet another magical woman, and in a way that would discourage any conflict between her and said mage. Laudna's epilogue with Imogen being considered a 'happy ending' really hinges on the idea that those two each other's perfect matches

So this is an interesting approach! I have to admit: I don't find the choice to age to be particularly bad, nor discouraging of conflict. I think it just means that she'll live around as long as Imogen will, as a human woman. I think if they were to break up, or if Imogen were to meet an untimely end, it just means Laudna would still live to a typical human lifespan.

But this is an interesting point that I think I touched on briefly when interacting with that weirdo last night, which is that it really feels in the end that Laudna never has her own life. Hell, Liliana manages to more satisfyingly say "huh, I've spent my entire life from probably my early 20s to my 50s either effectively on the run and alone, I fell into the hands of a very powerful wizard who treated me as a vessel, I never really unlearned my brainwashing from that, and now that it's over I think I need to go out in the world and figure out who I am as a person because my entire adulthood was lost to that" and Laudna never does. Even the ritual to make her live a typical lifespan feels very much a having your cake and eating it too - it's always been interesting that Laudna made these sort of intermittently expressed overtures towards liking her weird gross undead state and that mechanically Marisha leaned into it beyond the rules of Hollow One but then she does not get the unwilling immortality because of yet another quite literal Deus Ex Machina. It feels like just one more case of this party getting to have it both ways, for free, without ever having to choose, and the dumbest people alive shrieking at me that what I find to be a desperate saccharine dying dream of an ending is happy and that because it is "happy" any criticism must be a personal failure (and then some other rando will weakly bust through like an incontinent kool-aid man to fart out how unfortunate it is people are so uncivil and unkind and attacking people's intelligence and morals this campaign, meaning, of course, me for existing while holding an opinion and not breaking down in tears and capitulating to everyone who comes on my posts, but not the people who come on my post and call me stupid and unfeeling, because they agree with those people, because campaign 3 appeals, as I've said many times, to the posers who can dish it out and not take it, and not to like, intelligent adults.)

I don't find this ending happy because it's so divorced from reality it feels like weightless nothing, in the end; that's my feeling on all the lack of consequences, actually - as one of my mutuals said, easy come, easy go. Laudna never has a story; she never lets herself out of her own cages to have a story. The only framing people can even come up with to make it happy is "she had TRAUMA and now she has an ENDING where she's left alone" and even then it's like. Personally my feeling on anyone who treats their trauma as the reason they are interesting should be made to retrace the steps of the Franklin Expedition, which will make them interesting and/or at least temporarily remove them from my vicinity. If being left alone to do nothing is happy, why aren't you guys giving me a happy ending.

I meant to be a bit more reserved in this answer, and I have a similar ask to get to as well but I think what I'm trying to express and slowly losing my mind over is that the people who like Campaign 3 and loudly defend it are increasingly quite literally not of an intellectual caliber or level of interpersonal empathy to even join in the discussion with those of us who found it lacking. It's like explaining quantum physics to toddlers. We find ourselves having to define words as basic as "conflict" and "consequence," and repeatedly, with eroding patience, explain "sometimes, I think it is interesting when bad things happen to pretend people, and it is boring when good things happen to pretend people, because they are pretend, and sometimes different people have different feelings, and that is okay! but you need to let people have different feelings. Someone saying they don't like the blue truck doesn't mean you can't like the blue truck! But you can't make them like the blue truck."

[vylantrophi]

if anyone saw me post this and edit it 5 times just now NO U DIDNT!!! human redraws of dumb tmnt screenshots <3

donnie doesnt look like the same frickin person idk if thats testament to his expressiveness or my inconsistency ALDBSNNFCKDIGJEGHR leo and mikey look funny tho :3

i wanted to start drawing the prologue pages to my actual AU series but my mental health suddenly plummeted x'( i'll just take it easy and doodle other stuff until i have more energy for the real deal, i'm excited though

also reminder my asks r open, in case yall wanna ask anything about my au and the hamatos !! would also love some opinions on them because i feel like im crazy for liking my au donnie so much T__T im not insecure about my genderfluid au casey at ALL but for some reason theres something in my brain constantly telling me "hey people r gonna find ur genderfluid donnie weird lmao" which i KNOW isn't true- still though any opinions on my human hamato siblings thru asks or somethin would be SOOO rad i'd love to respond!!! thank you

[red-phantom-0]

ᵢₘ ₙₒₜ ₚₐᵢD ₑₙₒᵤGₕ Fₒᵣ ₜₕᵢₛ. 𖦹ᯅ𖦹

saiki reader x batfam shenigans

꩜ .ᐟ I start my morning like any regular person - waking up to the sound of the ceiling falling apart - wait a minute. WHAT ? I quickly teleported off my bed into the hallway, and I immediately saw my Jason fall from the ceiling , crash landing into MY bed .

Mind you , this is MY bed that's covered in filty debris now . Jason coolly shrugs off the debris and looks at me, shocked, " Morning ( reader) nice bed you got." I scowl , " Of all places you could of inconvenience me you picked here ?"

Jason opened his mouth but closed it as soon as Tim came running into my room , screaming his head off . " Omgbruceisgpnnakillusifhefindsoutwetriedenteringintoanotheralterrealityagain" he says in panic as he frantically tries pullout of whatever left of my bed . " Ayo, calm down. I'm sure (reader) can fix this," Jason assures him.

I shot him a glare , " Why do I have to fix your mess ?" . " Because you our super amazing lovely incredible loving sibling " Tim pleads. I gave him a glare too and lord behold walks in Dick with Damian in tow . " Is everyone alright -" Dick asks as he asses the situation.

" It appears Jason's fat ass fell through the ceiling about time he manages to fall through the floor boards," Damain says with a snare . Jason throws a debri at the child who screams and hides behind Dick. " Okay, seriously, why does everyone like to disrupt my peaceful mornings ?" I complain.

" Because we love you," Jason says confidently . " I don't." Damian retrots , " No one asked for your opinion, " Tim sasses . " Okay - everyone stop fighting let's all fix this mess before Bruce gets back " Dick says in attempt to bring order . " Great , I'll be in the kitchen " I say as I go to teleport away.

" Oh no you don't this is a team effort (reader) " Jason complains as he tackles me to the floor. " What is going on here " came Bruce's voice as he appears behind Dick and Damian's form in the figure.

" Daddd" Dick nervously chuckles out . " Father it is all Drake and Todd's fault -" Damian says with a smirk . " I am going to sell that damn child -" Tim complains while glaring at Damian . " Heyyy Bruceeeeee nice uhhh weather we got righttt ?" Jason attempts to distract away from the mess in the room.

Bruce stands there and watches us with an exhausted look. " All if you are grounded " he says firmly before walking away . " WAIT I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING " protested all of us in unison . " You are all grounded and that's final " Bruce says with finality before he disappears behind the corner.

Everyone sighs in frustration. " I'm not paid enough for this," I mumbled out as I teleported myself to the kitchen to hopefully at least enjoy a coffee jelly . > ⤙ < .

[velvetvexations]

*constantly talking about how stupid and selfish "TRFs" are* *contantly implying you understand gender better than most other trans women* *contantly harassing and insulting random people making posts* oh my god thank you for all the love! this is such a kind and accepting space 🤢

I mean yeah I am constantly excessively kind and patient when people aren't just saying "fuck trans men, those stupid bitchcunt vulva-havers for thinking they don't have it easy." This is extremely consistant in all my interactions. The few times when I was snappy at someone who didn't earn it I've directly apologized without prompting.

Recently someone who really badly wanted to be my friend and kept offering to hang out on Discord because she thought I was "lonely" got really dramatically upset because I blocked her after she defended misgendering trans men, describing this as me being a "single issue voter" because we disagreed about "one thing" and honestly that was hilarious. Truly wild behavior.

Like if you aren't going out of your way to be absurdly cruel to other people, yes, this blog is a place of love, and polite, reasonable engagement. If you've not had that experience, consider asking yourself why. And again, if any TRF, even one of the mega-popular ones I've ground my teeth over, wanted to say they were sorry for the rhetoric they've encouraged and personally thrown at others, I would support them. I would throw my weight entirely behind the effort to give them full amnesty for the many, many horrible things they've done and said.

Gotta say though, I'm not sure what's wrong with the accusation I think I understand gender better than some other trans women. Presumably if you put me and whoever you favorite TRF is in a room together, you would say one of us understands gender better than the other, right? I think I have a far more reality-based view than someone who thinks every Pastor Billy Bob who hates queers secretly agrees with us being women, and I'm pretty sure that's actually the majority opinion among trans women because I have a fairly high opinion of trans women as a demographic and it would be insulting towards them to even suspect otherwise.