#not take away something that can otherwise help others.
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girl4music · 21 hours ago
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Kind of afraid to add my take to this post in case I get told to “make my own post” because the OP will disagree but I’m gonna be brave and say it anyway.
Regarding OP’s example of understanding but not valuing hierarchies - it is not necessarily refusing to “do it”, or more specifically, adhere to the social construct of hierarchies. It’s just saying that you don’t value them and don’t believe in them or don’t agree with them.
I don’t agree with working more hours than I have to when it comes to one of my co-workers having to leave work early. But I still do it or adhere to the social construct of it because it helps my co-worker out.
But if it repeatedly happens and there’s less and less reason for it to do so - then I’m going to contest it.
So you can still “get something” even if you don’t like it.
Now, with the example of mathematics or board games. That’s different because you’ve agreed to the social construct of it in the first place. You wouldn’t not do it otherwise you’d be refusing to work out the equation or play the game. Following social rules depends on the context, sure. But you can’t match-for-match “I don’t get it” with every scenario of not “doing it”, because they still might get it, - they may even operate in it.
That still doesn’t mean they have to agree with or like it.
And if the take away is that autistic people “don’t do” something because “they don’t get it” - that’s ableist.
I’m fairly sure that won’t match up to mathematics/board games. They’d understand that they agreed to the social construct of “doing it” and even if they don’t like the outcome, it’s not because they “don’t get it”.
Also I’m not autistic but I don’t value hierarchies either.
I do understand what they are and how they operate and that’s very much the reason why I don’t value them.
Beliefs - I don’t believe in identity in any capacity.
Do I ignore the fact identities exist? No. It’s a social construct a majority of people follow, I can’t ignore it as long as it’s part of the collective consciousness because that comes across as me telling a person that they don’t exist - when I don’t mean to do that at all.
My belief is a very personal belief and I treat it as such.
Those kind of social constructs or social rules you have no choice but to “do” or adhere to because social navigation and social interaction cannot function.
I could believe the sky is “orange” rather than “blue” - that might be truth to me but it might not be for others.
I do not ever impose my belief on that other person.
So, you see, the social rules and social constructs don’t just vary by context but also collective consciousness.
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bullet-prooflove · 18 hours ago
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"I've been losing so much time" for Hangman please!! 🥺
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Tagging: @kmc1989 @dizzybee03 @shanimallina87 @calirindo @consisedictionaryofmistakes
Companion piece to:
Set Up To Fail - Jake reflects on how his past affects his future.
The Other Family - Jake didn't realise his father was still alive...
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Jake loses track of how long he spends sitting in front of his father’s house, his gaze fixed on him and his family. He watches as the man who sold him, sits at the dining table, helping the twins with their homework while a woman whose not his mom, tidies up around them.
It would be fascinating he thinks, if it didn’t feel so fucking surreal.
It’s the sound of the passenger door opening that jerks him out of his trance, that and the bark of greeting that erupts from Cujo as he jumps into the car ahead of you, jamming his cold nose against Jake’s cheek.
“Cujo, away!” You command, clicking your fingers and gesturing to the back seat. The German Shepard obeys, slipping through the gap, whining as he stands on the cushioning.
“You didn’t need to come here.” Jake says, his attention diverting back to the house, to his father ruffling one of the twin’s hair.
“Jake, you didn’t come home.” You say softly. “The Find My Friend’s app tells me you’ve been sitting outside this house for three hours. I came to make sure you hadn’t been murdered and buried in the basement.”
It’s a weak joke that would have made him laugh in any other circumstance but it falls flat because Jake, he doesn’t feel anything at the moment. There’s just this crushing numbness in his chest, eating up his insides.
“That man in there, he’s my father.” He tells you, his hands coming to rest on the steering wheel, his knuckles turning white as he grips it. “And he has another family, one with a wife and two sons who he helps with their homework.”
That weight of that statement, it’s not lost on you. You know his history, the horrible fucking shit he’s had to overcome to get where he is today. Those scars, he lives with them on a daily basis and the man who caused them, he’s completely unaffected.
“I can’t seem to leave.” He tells you, his voice breaking. “I keep telling myself I’m going to but I just can’t make myself turn on the engine. It’s like my brain won’t cooperate with my body…”
You understand in that moment that he’s dissociated completely. That the trauma of seeing his father again has trapped him in this strange sense of depersonalisation. It’s something that happens with PTSD, something you’d experienced yourself after a bullet almost claimed your life.
“Alright.” You say gently. “The first thing you’re going to do is let go of the wheel. Can you do that for me?”
It takes him a couple of seconds but he relinquishes his grasp on the steering wheel before you help him unbuckle his seatbelt.
“What now?” He asks, tilting his head towards you.
There’s such exhaustion in his features, such devastation. Seeing his father again has ravaged every single inch of Jake’s soul and he’s looking to you for guidance because this nightmare, it’s just too big to process right now.
“You get into the back seat with Cujo and I’ll drive the three of us home.” You say kindly and Jake nods his head despondently before he opens the car door and does as requested. You climb into the driver’s seat, adjusting the rearview mirror just in time to see Cujo place his head in Jake’s lap, his soulful dark eyes staring up at his favourite  person.
“It's alright.” He whispers to the dog, his palm lightly stroking over the German Shepard’s fur. “Everything’s going to be alright.”
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nineteenninety-six · 2 days ago
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Hi! I’m not sure if you write for the pesky blondes anymore but I loved all your word with them! Could you do one with daughter reader, who tries really hard at school or a sport (like comporting or winning lots of medals) to impress Tommy who is distant with her but end up giving up after a while because he doesn’t pay attention to it? And he only notices because Polly or another family member asks about and she goes “oh, I dropped it.” And they realize why and confront Tommy about it? It can end however you want otherwise, thank you!
AN: Hi, omg can you believe it's been almost 2 years since I last posted something and I have tried to write over the last couple years but I struggled. Anyway, hopefully this is good and you like it as it's been forever since I wrote and it's probably ooc since I haven't watched PB in forever either.
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Born years before the war to a mother that died shortly after, and her father sent away to the war when she was still a child, YN’s relationship with her father was almost non-existent. She was too young to have any memories of him before he left and when he returned, he wasn’t the same man, a shell of his former self.
She had been mostly raised by her Aunt Polly even after her father and uncles return from the war and her father had his moments of trying to be involved with her life but those moments never lasted long, usually inspired by some near death moment that reminded him of the preciousness of life before he pulled himself into some other sort of all encompassing drama that had him disappearing from her life for months on end.
YN was eager for her fathers acknowledgment, not even approval but the mere recognition of her existence and so she decided to try and prove herself to him, to show how smart and what a good daughter she was.
Things changed when Charlie was born and her father married Grace but once again that didn’t last once Grace died as her father disappeared once again and she was left at Arrow House with her baby brother and the house staff and so she focused on helping the staff with Charlie and studying hard at school, getting some of the highest grades in her year but even that did not capture the attention of her father and so she tried something else.
⋅───⊱༺ ♰ ༻⊰───⋅
“Horseback riding?” Her father glanced up at her from his seat behind his grand desk in his office.
“They offer it to year ten and I thought…” YN nodded, referencing the expensive elite private school that her father sends her to.
Her father pursed his lips and sighed, “You have more than one bloody horse out there…”
YN glanced out of her window to the vast paddocks and fields that surrounded Arrow House before turning her focus back to her father, “It’s not the same father. You rarely allow me to take Sweetcorn or Biscuit out for rides and you certainly don’t allow me to have a hand in their care but at school I’ll learn how to ride and compete with them along with taking care of them”
Her fathers gaze was heavy but she did not buckle under its weight.
”And what about your other classes? Tennis, ballet, swimming, golf…”
YN paused at the mention of the extra classes she was participating in, not even realizing her father knew but she guessed that since he was paying for everything he had to.
“Well, I’ve been managing with my classes so far, what’s one more” YN shrugged, shooting her father almost a sheepish smile
Tommy watched her for a few more moments before he sighed and signed her permission slip before holding it out for her, “If this is what you wish”
YN grabs the slip with a thankful smile, hoping that this is what will hopefully get her father to become more involved in her life.
”Thank you, father”
⋅───⊱༺ ♰ ༻⊰───⋅
YN scanned the crowds looking for her father, her eyes darting from left to right, eyes peeled wide open as if it would help her find the brooding brummie but to no avail, but she did see her younger brother, her aunt and her uncles all cheering from her in the stands not far her and while she smiled and waved back at them her heart sunk at the non-appearance of her father.
Here she was at a national competition, competing against the best in the country, yet her father was nowhere to be seen. A whole year of hard practice, six days a week along with juggling her other sports and school, to try and impress her father and he hadn’t even bothered to show his face.
Feeling eyes on her, YN looked around and found her aunts scrutinising eyes on her and so not to arouse suspicion, YN swallowed the bitter taste in her mouth and sent her aunt a smile that she was sure that the older woman did not believe for a single moment, before turning around and heading to her stall where her trainer was waiting for her.
Two hours later and still no sign of her father, YN stood at the top of the podium with her trophy in one hand, bouquet in the other and a grin forced on her face after she won and she kept her eyes on her younger brother, on his bright smile and loud cheers and not on the space that should contain their absent father.
⋅───⊱༺ ♰ ༻⊰───⋅
Christmas Day at Arrow House was always a grand event with all of YN’s uncles, aunts and cousins travelling to Warwickshire on Christmas Eve to start their annual celebration and though YN was quite a bit older than her cousins, she enjoyed spending time with them anyway.
The whole family sat around the large table in the dining room, everybody talking over each other and YN was brought out of conversation with her aunt Ada by her aunt Polly asking a seemingly innocent question.
”YN, when is your next ballet recital? The last one was a joy to watch.”
YN took a nervous sip of her water before she answered, “Oh, I um stopped ballet.”
Polly look at her in surprise as Esme chimed in,
“Oh with all the extracurriculars you do I’m surprised you managed to keep up with everything at once”
“I dropped those too…I’ve dropped all my sports.” YN murmurs, “Figured it’s best to focus on school and my studies only”
All of the adults at the table had overheard what she had said and were in an uproar. It was well known how much YN loved her sports and competing, so to hear that she was suddenly quitting made no sense.
”Whaddya mean 'quitting'?!" Arthur asked, his voice carrying loudly.
”Well good exam results will take me to university, so I’ve decided to focus on that only” YN tried to explain.
”You’ve never had any problems with balancing it before, why now?” Polly asked.
YN’s eyes flicker up to her fathers face, no-one catching it other than her aunt Polly.
”Classes are getting harder”
That’s all YN had to say before she changed the conversation topic to something other than her.
⋅───⊱༺ ♰ ༻⊰───⋅
Polly made her way into Tommy’s late into the night that evening, knowing the man barely slept and would be up and in his office.
“Are you planning on talking to your daughter?” Polly asked as she settled in the seat opposite her nephew.
Tommy raised a curious eyebrow as he poured his aunt a glass of whiskey and passed it over to her, “About?”
“Quitting all of her sports…?”
”Yeah well you heard her, she wants to focus on school”
Polly huffs a disbelieving sigh, disappointed in Tommy,
”When was the last time you saw that girl struggling with her workload hmm? Not to mention the countless amount of times she’s helped out with Charlie on top of everything else she does”
Tommy paused at her words, realising that he hasn’t really paid YN any attention recently.
“When was the last time you even went to one of her shows, competitions or award shows hm?” Polly drilled him, “This girl of yours is amazing and you’re ignoring her Tommy”
“I’m not ignoring her!” Tommy became defensive, “She almost an adult, she can do what she wants”
”Don’t you see it?!” Polly’s patience wears thin as she snaps at her nephew, “You barely spent any time with her when she was a mere child and still now you don’t! You hardly know the girl while she’s stretching herself thin trying to prove herself and you don’t even pay her enough attention to realise!”
Tommy was left speechless at the rightful telling off he had received as after all, Polly was correct.
Tommy barely spent time with YN when she was younger and as the years went by he spent even less. Stilted conversations over dinner was their relationship and he had no one but himself to blame.
“I-I didn’t…” Tommy stumbled over his words as he tried to settle the thousands of thoughts that were racing through his mind, “I didn’t think to…”
Polly stood up and faced her nephew, “This is your last chance. After tonight, the door that she has kept open for many years will be closed and locked with the key thrown away. You have one chance Tommy, do not squander it.”
With that, Polly left Tommy’s office, hoping that her words spurred him into action.
Tommy didn’t wait long before he was speeding out of his office and darting upstairs to his daughters room hoping and praying that she was still awake and when he knocked on her door and she called him in, the slightest of weights was lifted off of his shoulders.
“It’s me,” He announced, poking his head past her door.
Surprise flashed over YN’s face as his appearance as she beckoned him in, sitting up straighter as she placed the book she was reading to the side.
“Is something wrong?”
“I wanted to speak about what happened at dinner” Tommy took a seat on the edge of YN’s bed, “About you dropping your extra classes”
“It’s nothing” YN tried to dismiss it. “Just thought I should focus on school more so I can get into a good university, that's all”
“YN, you’re the smartest person I know” For the first time in a long time, Tommy spoke to YN one to one, in hopes that this conversation will be the first step in repairing their relationship, “Not only that but you are the most talented and hardworking person I know.”
YN paused for a moment after he finished before she spoke up, “Yet you never attended an award ceremony or performance or competing…how am I meant to know how you feel? …I did all of this to get a sliver of your attention, always hoping that one, just one of the many things I laden myself with would finally be the thing that’ll make you pay attention to me and you can’t even be bothered to show when it matters”
“I know nothing I can say to fix what I have done but all I ask for is one more chance and most of all, don’t give up on the things you love, not for me, not for anyone. Ever.”
Tommy knew words would not mend the hurt he has caused his daughter over the years but he hoped that she would give him this one last chance to fix it through his actions and behaviour.
YN takes a deep breath and nods, “One last chance”
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fictionfixations · 21 hours ago
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what if bridon arc but i pay attention to the times (ep 1) (at least the ones that i can notice since some look like they have something but then i cant make it out so shrug)
im really bad at dates so bear with me here. dates will be added to time when i can see it on that frame but unless stated otherwise just assume theyre following each other in order
23:10 - they hide in the darkroom
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23:11 - he pauses before rushing to xiaoshi who is laying on the ground. xiaoshi takes his hand, apologies and tells him 'save them'
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00:04 - lu guang is upstairs getting the photo (HE SPENT AN HOUR WITH XIAOSHIS DEAD BODY IM-)
00:05 (09-13) - he goes back in time
17:32 - he ends up back in the past (assumedly. his watch is missing but its the time on the photo)
05:29 (04-12) (it then ticks to 05:30) - bruhs sitting on his bed thinking. his eyes are still gold
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05:31 - he puts his hands down
08:00 - xiaoshi is in his bed looking at his phone, at lu guang's contact (google translate tells me xiaoshi tells him that they should play basketball together tomorrow)
when he stops by at the time where he probably helps them paint the building his eyes are normal colored
13:30 (06-09) - xiaoshi is there to take pictures of the main coser (lu guang) of the anime club
12:30 probably..? (next day) - they arrive at the convention
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13:34 - they get the kung fu master package (the bag) and qiao ling leaves to get it
14:35 (06-10) - qiao ling exits the line after getting the collector's edition of kung fu master 7
DONT BE SHY SHOW ME THE TIME
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15:54 - lu guang gets the display book and opens it
15:55 - hes flipping through it
i cant read this. google translate says it says '13:30 start shooting' so i assume when they start taking pictures at the con
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'13:35 separate actions' when qiao ling left to get the game?
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'14:45 lost items' assumedly around when qiao ling and miaomiao switch bags (or maybe when she realized they had switched bags?)
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'15:55 found the photo' the photo in the display book of her?
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15:56 - lu guang says he knows how to find her through divination
15:57 - he tells them to close their eyes, xiaoshi protests but qiao ling says to give it a try
15:59 - hes about to look through the photo
16:00 - he looks (that is 16 right?)
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(looking through photo) 14:35 - qiao ling and miaomiao say goodbye and switch bags
22:52 - miaomiao flashback (how do i describe this)
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(past) signing event of RanXi Chronicles at 15:00 next saturday?
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16:59 (06-10 2019) - xiaoshi talks about adding his divination (if it was real) as a side gig to the studio
17:00 - lu guang says he has to leave, qiao ling tells them to hurry up. he turns back but xiaoshi grabs his wrist and brings him inside
(flashback) 14:50 - vivian getting zhou xun into investing (also same time when he gives her 100k seemingly? or he was thinking it)
7:20 (pm?) - they beg lu guang to do his magic thing (I think? the seconds hand keeps confusing me). lu guang tells them to get out as his condition
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next day at 7:20-ish pm - lu guang has their phones on call and puts one in xiaoshi's breast pocket
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8 pm - xiaoshi meets vivian who thinks he is zhou xun
21:46 - vivian seemingly texted the bad guy (idk name) that xiaoshi (who she thinks is zhou xun) took the bait (again im using google translate so idk)
??? - vivian says that lu guang could get hurt (as an example, if he wanted to run away if he joined them?)
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whatever this time is - vivian pretends to hurt him and has him fake his death
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the guys enter the room
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revealed vivian betrayed the bad guys, and xiaoshi n lu guang run away
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11:30 - zhou xun sees the news of vivian being a suspect (his text to her is about meeting again since he missed it yesterday)
7:20 am (probably, its bright outside) - xiaoshi tells him that he worries about lu guang disappearing. lu guang tells him he can stay in the photo studio. they do the clap that means theyre partners for life
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that.. should be it?
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gracemain919 · 1 day ago
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how do the leaders handle an overstimulated y/n like if the reader is autistic
Thanks for the ask:), also Friendly reminder that a few of my OCs are jerks.
(The Fungus universe)
Tw: Yandere, neglect,
The Liar:
Oh, please. He will ignore your clear signs of distress since he prefers to not deal with them, and if you vocalize your issues he will make you someone else's problem. Maybe on a good day, he may give your needs a bit more attention, but that is once on a full moon.
Poison:
Makes sense, the lab is full of smells and irritable sounds that sometimes drive her own workers mad, so she won't question your needs. Instead, she will quickly find a solution which is usually handing you your favorite drink(straight from the faucet that is her throat), and taking a walk outside the lab with you by her side. In hopes of calming down your nerves.
The Cannibal:
He can’t tell or care much about your discomfort. You gotta set the record straight and he might take some responsibility. You sometimes don't recognize the things he does as ‘helpful’ but he thinks he is helping. Sending his guards out of your sight when you feel overwhelmed or letting you draw on his flesh. You may try and push him in the right direction with your necessities, but there is a high chance he might misunderstand your orders.
Doppelganger:
He could see, the way your gaze turns away from his acts. The way you hug yourself in ache when he practices. God, the showbiz is all about sparks and music, and you can't handle that? At first, he won't give it much mind in hopes you will toughen up, but your ignorance can only be tolerated for so long…
In an act of great need, he may change his acts… With great anger and stubbornness, but it will be done. Just for your sweet eyes to look upon him once more. He will dull down his performances to your liking. If that pleases you…
Yet again, he may backtrack all the progress in seconds if he feels like it, so it depends on his mood.
Illusionist:
Did they do something wrong? ;-;
They will almost instantly notice, millions of eyes on you can't miss a thing. Yet… should they leave?
They think their the problem to your pain, and no matter how much you tell them otherwise they will always leave you alone during those periods of overstimulation.
Or, stay in one piece, extra butterflies hidden away from your view since they think their large numbers may be overwhelming you too.
Eye In the Sky:
He sees it, in the corner of his vision, the way you fiddle with your hands or appear in obvious agitation with the other leaders.
Unlike the other leaders, he had done research on actual knowledgeable solutions for this sort of thing. Even getting you some noise-cancelling headphones if sound is the thing ticking you off. However, don't expect him to waste a single second more of his time actually helping you in person. Someone else will have to take that role since he’s busy.
The Priest:
Oh, dear… Poor thing. Your distance from the resident's card game was noticeable. The Priest himself watches over the cafeteria before quickly and discreetly pulling you aside.
He is more than willing to help you with anything and this is no exception. He may help by letting you stay in your room or his office, or quiet down the cacophony some residents may be causing. Anything… anything. He is more than willing to help.
(This is not very well proof read)
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genderqueerdykes · 2 days ago
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i know this isn't exactly what you usually talk about but i need to ask somewhere and you seem really safe and kind about stuff.
I'm struggling to work out if i 'count' as physically disabled - because like most of my problems (fatigue, joint pains, weakness) are Not That Bad™️ and most of them would probably get a lot better if not go away completely if i did things like eat better and sleep properly and exercise more but between the aforementioned fatigue and pain and the autism and the having a 9-5 job and so on it makes it practically impossible to do those things anyway. Like yeah my weak ass legs would probably be better if i did exercise but i dont have the time or the energy.
But then also Something Is Up like i had back pain at age 5 - that's not normal. Nobody ever diagnosed it as anything i just went to a chiro a few times and got some stretches i rarely did because a) i was a kid and b) the stretches either didnt do anything at all, or were literally impossible. Like there were a few that were completely trivial and i could do to the maximum extension of healthy joints unless i was otherwise injured, and others where i physically couldn't reach the starting position - not even always because of pain but just because my joints physically didnt move that far. (I try to do the ones i can still at least sometimes but i've forgotten the ones that were physically impossible) So like there has to be Something up - a 5 year old does not get back pain for lifestyle reasons.
Idk. this is getting ramble-y i think but i just don't know what i feel and I'm so shit scared of doctors (for no good reason, they're just very stressful environments) that i haven't ever brought any of it up as an adult and so there hasn't been any attempt to do anything about it anyway but also i'll probably just get told to stretch and exercise anyway and as discussed that isn't always an option.
I read a fair bit of physical disability stuff and i sometimes reblog or engage with it a little bit if it's like 'oof ouch my back' or whatever that i relate to really obviously, but idk if I'm allowed to be in those spaces more obviously or what i should do about any of it either.
(ow. my hands hurt from holding my phone to type all that. that's getting worse too. not sure what's up with that...)
hello there!
generally i'd say that if you're experiencing joint pain, especially right as you begin standing on your feet and weakness, there's a very good chance there's an underlying issue. that's enough to say that you're physically disabled, as it's impacting your ability to work, stand on your feet, and so on. it's up to an individual to decide whether or not they feel disabled by their aches, pains and so on
definitely try to avoid chiropractors moving forward- most of what they do is nebulously helpful at best and damaging at worst. if you are able to do so, seeing a rheumatologist, orthopedist, physical therapist or kinesiologist. you may be able to speak to a pain management specialist in your area if that's necessary. you can get referrals to these types of specialists and appointments through your doctor.
best of luck in figuring out what's going on. i would say it sounds like that's disabling for you. i hope you're able to get some help for that so you can have an easier time. take care for now, stay safe
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engagemythrusters · 1 year ago
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evidently controversial take: i don't mind if people get botox. yes, even if it's to alter their face to fit some beauty standard. why? cause if botox is easy to get, that means that I, a disabled person whose quality of life could be drastically improved by botox, won't have to jump through the hoops i jump through on a regular basis to get help i need.
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blindedguilt · 8 months ago
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//Was thinking about posting this on my alt, but since I figure I've spoken about this frequently enough on this blog and it's THE dedicated Leonard Space™️... //I'm throwing up and crying thinking about how leonard had never gotten to experience romantic or sexual attraction (or will ever GET to experience those things, unrequited or not) without complete dread and self-blame and guilt and how that must have been growing up with the hope and expectations of "Being in love must be so nice, I hope I'll be able feel that one day" and not ONLY having that hope gradually dwindle as he grew into the "expected marriageable age" watching those around him go on with their lives and attain those things in a way that seems so natural but is so foreign to him and the absolute sadness of the point the notion of "attraction" and "falling in love" turned to complete and abject horror and disgust when he realises that this is what his mind has decided is "Normal" for him, and all possibilities and aspirations he may have had of a child, teen, young adult, etc. up to that point of even the bare minimum is now a complete impossibility. //how it fully sets in he'll never experience love. never find his own family or someone to be interested in and care about in such a way or even feel attraction without that weight attached.... like idc, actual relationships are one thing but if ANYTHING you should at least be able to know the joy of falling in love if even for a SECOND without any strings (Disgust, guilt, self-hate, etc.) attached!!!! guys!!!!!!! //HE'S WAY TOO KIND AND GENTLE AND HANDSOME AND CARING AND HUMBLE AND A GENTLEMAN AND HANDSOME AND HIS VOICE IS WAY TOO SEXY FOR THIS SHIT, HE DOESN'T DESERVE THIS!!!!! LET HIM LOVE!!!!!!! HE'S SHOWN TO HAVE SO MUCH TO GIVE IN SO MANY DIFFERENT WAYS (Parental, familial, just being an empathetic person towards his "enemies" in general) AND YET HE DIES HAVING NEVER KNOWN IT...... WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO HIM........... ouuugughhh.........
#||ooc||#||relevant||#{/having feelings about leonard again someone kiss him or beat him up with a lead pipe rlly quickly how do we process this.....}#{/there's just something about leonards SPECIFIC iteration of the 'beyond help' and 'guy who doesn't deserve this gets the worst of it'}#{/tropes that REALLY hurts in how he deserves it the LEAST and is so UTTERLY beyond hope ur like 'idek how i can make this better'}#{/the more i think about it the more insane 1.3 is to me in the idea that in its own completely fucked up degenerate way}#{/leonard may have been the only one of that group to have a POSITIVE bend to his character and how he carries himself}#{/where arioch; caim; furiae; etc. are either made more negative or are the same but with different context}#{/and the reason for that is is that is takes away the strongest thing that makes leonard so compelling and GUT-WRENCHING as a character:}#{/that caring demeanour is still TECHNICALLY there on the surface; but beneath that this leonard just let himself go COMPLETELY}#{/by becoming what would be the absolute NIGHTMARE of DOD1 Leonard and tossing the morals connected with his guilt out the window}#{/he's 'fixed' himself mentally; and no longer is completely miserable and wracked with guilt (perhaps grief!! but thats another thing)}#{/BECAUSE HE'S CONVINCED HIMSELF HE HAS NOTHING TO BE GUILTY ABOUT ANYMORE}#{/i guess to sum it up nicely}#{/the only way for leonard; who's tried his best to love and care for SO many people; to be happy with himself}#{/is to hurt other people. specifically the most vulnerable he fought more than anything to protect}#{/otherwise; his only solution to be happy with himself - or at least; no longer suffering - is to DIE}#{/just..... oooooogh........ *curls up into a little ball and explodes*}#{/i miss him.... i wanna write him again..... i want to put him into a situation he can feel at peace and Normal....}
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tardis--dreams · 5 months ago
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Gotta talk to the department boss tomorrow because i asked for opportunities to increase my work hours. I regret it already but i can't back out now so this is gonna be fun (:
#I'll probably say I'd be happy to stay in my current contract until next february and then I'd be happy to do something more challenging/#work more hours#because i generally would love to work more but with my current health insurance it's not allowed and if i switch#to a different position i will no longer be able to help the others the way i am currently doing and that would be unfair#considering i only started 6 months ago and i don't want to work more if it means the Others also have to work more#maybe I'll just quit/fake my death and never show up there again instead (:#i really don't want to have this conversation ahhhh#it's so embarrassing#but i guess it's an opportunity to talk about a potential future full time position for me there#because i really need some sort of plan for what happens after i'm excluded from student health insurance next year#not because I'll have finished my degree but because I'll be too old 🤡#and if i don't have a job it's gonna be too expensive to live lol#I'll also have to pay for rent myself then so the current income won't suffice ahahah#also my coworker said something about 'salary expectations' and i cannot stress enough how much i do not want to have to talk about that#because hey. i get minimum wage rn. if i was still working at the university I'd get 2 Euros more per hour#if i worked in a supermarket I'd probably get even more (which is fair considering the horrors people working there are facing)#but as i currently don't even have a masters degree and probably can't work as an editor right away#and his company is dirt poor (as it seems. it likes to pretend otherwise but the salary is shit even for experienced employees)#an actually appropriate salary expectation won't be appreciated lol#also i just read that trainees aren't entitled to minimum wage??? apparently? so I'd probably get Less money??#i would probably really just quit and take the next best job i can get at university until i finish my degree#and then enter my career in customer service and kill myself before i turn 35 because it's just not worth the pain#jesus christ why did i bring it up#digging my own grave here#void screams#work stuff
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trianglegoddess · 2 months ago
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I'm Still Standing
The League felt like they had a strong sense of Phantom’s power. After all, they wouldn’t have asked him to join the team, otherwise. He’s strong, he can fly, and due to his supernatural nature, he’s amazing on recon and stealth missions. He’s also incredibly reliable, and smarter than most people give him credit for. He’s a natural hero, a more snarky Captain Marvel, some news outlets have been saying. Always saving people with just the right words to say, with a humble smile on his face. 
Phantom, with all of his power, seemed untouchable in every definition of the word. 
And then they got invaded by Darkseid. 
It wasn’t the first time Darkseid had invaded Earth, but it was the first time bringing armies so large, the first time he’s attacked all over the world to spread the League thin. It is single handedly the worst alien invasion Earth has ever had. 
Batman, bleeding out on the sidewalk, Wonder Woman knocked unconscious and restrained by a nearly egregious amount of henchmen, Superman, weak from the kryptonite Darkseid had shot him with. Thankfully it had missed all the important bits, but with that bullet inside of him, Superman was also down for the count, as well as dozens of other League members. 
If it hadn’t been for Phantom, they would have lost. 
Phantom, who’s never been seen without a smile on his face until now. Phantom, who’s never had so much as a scratch on him, until now. Phantom, who has only ever been known to be kind and compassionate, even to his villains, until now. 
Usually there’s this sort of warm, comforting feeling that radiates from Phantom. It feels like a nice breeze on a warm summer’s day, a nice cup of hot cocoa, your favorite song. It’s a feeling of safety, as if everything will be alright just because he’s there. 
Here, though, something else, something much stronger, is radiating from him. It practically rolls off of him in huge waves, making those conscious around him more aggravated, more on edge.
Phantom pulls himself off of the ground. His suit is torn, and his green blood splattered on himself and the ground. He spits a glob of it out, along with a tooth. 
“Still, you stand,” Darkseid says, as if tired. “Do you not tire in the face of your own demise?”
“As long as I’m still standing, you won’t ever win,” Phantom says. His voice is low and threatening, reverberating eerily off of the broken infrastructure that surrounds them. It sends a chill down everybody’s spines, though if Darkseid is affected, he doesn’t show it. 
“Your comrades have fallen, your militaries have failed, and you have no other help arriving. Pray tell how one singular human will be able to take me down!” 
Phantom doesn’t answer right away. Instead, he walks forward so that his friends are behind him, and braces himself. Darkseid, unable to contain his own hubris, lets Phantom come closer. 
Phantom takes in a deep breath, as if he’s about to speak.  
Instead he wails. 
Any remaining glass shatters, raining down upon them as green sound waves push back the offending forces. 
And it’s loud, of course. The ears of Darkseid’s minions are bleeding, and many of them are either dying because it’s too much for them to bear, or they’re killing themselves to give themselves some modicum of relief. But it’s also more than that, more than noise. 
It’s mourning. 
The first feeling that overwhelms everyone is anger. Phantom’s anger at Darkseid, at the destruction, at the fact that he just can’t catch a fucking break and it’s not fair. The second, is the sadness. It weighs down upon their shoulders, suffocating them like smog. It invades every part of their being-their lungs, their joints, their very hearts-and it presses and presses and presses until there’s very nearly nothing left. 
Phantom still pushes on. He is nothing if not persistent, driven to fight, driven to protect his people, his team, his friends, his family. No mortal being could ever hope to have a lung capacity like this, but Phantom is no normal mortal, and Darkseid is finally starting to come to terms with that. 
The last wave of overwhelming emotion is more of an idea than it is an actual feeling. It’s not a threat, per se, but a promise. A promise to do everything in his power to destroy Darkseid and his forces permanently and with prejudice. A promise that no matter how hard Darkseid fights, he will not win. 
A promise that, if knocked down, Phantom will stand back up, and he will not lose. 
Eventually, after what feels like eternity, the wail dies down. There isn’t a single member of Darkseid’s army that’s still on their feet or in the air. Phantom collapses down to one knee, and bright, white rings flicker around his person for just a moment, before he wills them away and stands back up. 
It’s less walking towards Darkseid, and more stalking. They are not on equal footing. Phantom is the predator in every sense of the word, his anger and grief still radiating off of his body in ways that Darkseid is unable to comprehend. 
“Do you yield?” Phantom asks. His eyes are blazing green, burning into Darkseid’s very soul. It is a sort of animalistic, primal instinct deep within him that tells him, run, run as fast as you can. Darkseid’s hubris, however, remains unmatched. 
Even as he stares Death in the eye. 
“I do not,” Darkseid says. He tries to get to his feet, but his body won’t listen, still weighed down by the effects of Phantom’s wail. 
“Then as Phantom, King of the Dead, I hereby condemn you for the rest of your afterlife.”
“Don’t count your eggs yet, boy,” Darkseid spits. “I’m still alive.”
“No,” Phantom says, in a tone adjacent to someone who’s giving their condolences, “You’re not.”
Phantom gestures beside them, and Darkseid spares a glance and sees…Himself. 
His corpse is splayed on the ground, blood spurting out of his ears, nose, and eyes. He stares lifelessly up at the sky. The blood is still leaking down the sides of his face. 
“You’re dead now, Darkseid, and therefore under my jurisdiction. Due to your extensive list of crimes you will not receive a hearing, just your eternal damnation for the sins you’ve committed.”
Phantom waves his hand, and green chains and manacles appear on Darkseid’s wrists and ankles before he’s dusted out of existence, sent to his eternal punishment in another dimension. 
As soon as he’s gone, Phantom collapses to his knees. 
He’s not sure how long he’s there, sitting in the blood of those he’s killed, before Wonder Woman comes over. She’s covered in gashes and bruises and blood that isn’t hers, but she still stands tall and proud. A battle won is a reason for celebration, after all. 
He glances behind her, sees Superman taking Batman into his arms and flying off. 
Diana doesn’t ask him questions about how he’s feeling. A victory is a victory, sure, but not without its price. 
Instead, she holds out her hand. Danny grasps it, and allows her to help him to his feet. 
“As long as you can stand, you can win,” Diana says. “I think I’ll have to use that for my next big speech.”
“By all means,” Phantom tells her. “Just be sure to credit me.”
“Deal.”
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shotmrmiller · 4 months ago
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ghost getting himself a cute, soft girl he doesn't talk about much but is clearly obsessed with and price just thinks it's nice he's finally settled down, approves of the home he's made for himself, definitely approves of the one he's taken for himself.
soap asks kyle if he's seen you and he says, "yep. lovely bird he's got tucked away in her little dollhouse. makes great food, too." soap swears there's a subtle shift in his tone when he says "lovely", a hint of something deeper that flickers in his eyes for just a moment. soap simply sucks on his teeth, letting it slide. (although he knows that kyle's always been one to appreciate the good things in life.)
interest gnaws at him, a persistent itch he can't scratch. price likes you just fine, as does kyle. well what about him? he decides to bite the bullet and goes to simon with a knot between his brows, the corners of his lips tugged downwards. they've shared clothes, bullets, beds. if the other two got to meet you, why can't he?
"ya can come over for dinner on tonight. she'd 'ave my neck if she didn't formally meet ya anyway."
soap then asks, out of genuine curiosity more than anything else, if simon would have kept you in the dark from him hadn't he brought you up himself.
"ya meet 'er when i want ya to, boy, and not a moment before." the tone he takes is unmistakeable. his words are a command, not a suggestion, and soap instantly knows to not push further.
soap nods. "ah'll be there."
"course ya will. she'd be terribly disappointed otherwise."
yeah, he'd hate to have that.
soap sits in the living room, the soft glow of the lamp casting a warm light over the cozy place. with a full stomach and an unfastened belt, nursing a glass of kentucky. he can't remember the last time he ate that well or that much.
maybe it's the alcohol that loosens his tongue, or the fact that he wishes he also had a sweet little thing to keep at his side just like simon's doing with you now, but the thoughts he's been mulling over all evening since he first saw you tumble out of his mouth.
"while ah can attest to yer taste in sweethearts, can't say much about your alcohol. bourbon, LT?" he says, chest warm.
simon's arm tightens around your hips, fingers splayed possessively over your thigh. he shrugs, completely unbothered by the backhanded compliment. "can't be perfect in everythin', can we, sergeant?"
soap's cheeks burn furiously hot when you come to his defense with a smack of your palm onto simon's chest. "be nice to johnny. he's got a face that make up for some of his other flaws."
the teasing lilt in your voice unashamedly gets his southern blood pumping. he can't help it if certain things stir when someone as pretty as you look at him like that. soap swirls the amber liquid gently in the glass while keeping his limpid eyes on you, not even trying to hide the fact that his gaze hasn't wavered since your cheeky little comment.
you then whisper something in simon's ear, your cupped hand not even half the size of his head and soap has to rearrange himself from the outside when your teeth catch your bottom lip. simon looks up at you then, eyes heavy and half lidded, and a smirk plays at the corners of his mouth.
"'m not sure, love. you'll just 'ave to ask 'im yourself. go on."
you open that sweet mouth of yours, but simon cuts you off with a decisive wave of his hand. "no. you know how to ask for things."
your reaction to that is visceral, and you're on your knees faster than his alcohol-muddled brain can comprehend. don't look down 'er shirt, don't look down 'er shirt, don't-
"johnny, will you touch my pussy?"
he splutters at your question, completely taken aback, but it seems you're not done just yet.
"hands to yourself, sergeant. tha' not all."
you pout at simon, one that earns you a look that promises consequence, but do as he says.
"will you touch my pussy, johnny? pretty please?"
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selvepnea · 1 year ago
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Feeling. Weird...
#Sel talks#How to know when you're striking the right balance? How much trust you should you give to other people to know what that balance should be?#Especially if you can't recognize it yourself?#At what point am I sacrificing too much of my happiness for my safety or comfort?#He can try as much as he wants but it will still hurt me in the end#How full of himself can he be to say he doesn't know why we're pushing him away; recognize that there's something queer going on#And he's still talking about girls having dicks#Did it hurt when I told her I was holding on to the relationship for her sake? Because she seems to think it's a good idea?#Does she recognize that saying she had it worse/ I could have it worse doesn't help?#Why is she trying so hard to keep us as a family? I never asked that of her. She knows why we're distancing from our dad. Why?#Because she had it worse but is still in contact with her own dad? Why does she think that translates at all?#I have moral dilemma of taking money from my dad when 1) I don't like him and would rather not return the favor 2) our previous spat made i#Seem like he thought I was staying for the money 3) he keeps offering to pay for things#I want to say I can't recognize anything around me; but I know a part of that is sleapee and the other is not having the energy to go out#And be around people#But it's all too much; knowing people would rather me dead than to live happily; feeling like I'm powerless to stop the suffering of others#And I know a part of that is not being able to find people like me; lacking a community or otherwise friend group#Just. Feeling lost in my day to day. Not being able to really connect with anyone. And the one person I pay to drag that stuff out of me ma#not be the person I need#Feeling. Alone; disconnected; powerless; adrift; complacent; unable to grow; ect#Maybe I should get out tomorrow
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giamee · 8 months ago
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𝐄𝐀𝐓 𝐈𝐓 '𝐓𝐈𝐋 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐓𝐄𝐄𝐓𝐇 𝐑𝐎𝐓!
╭─────────────────────── ( 🍭 )
he just can't get enough of your pussy !
› 〉 📂 .ೃ | 🚨🚨🚨SMUT !! (f!reader receiving oral & fingering), uhhh pussydrunk hsr men who are MUNCHES <3, i think this is the first time writing smut on this blog so hereee we gooo, uhh clit slapping (only once thanks blade), overstim, nothin toooo crazy, ever so slight dom!reader for sampo (that man needs to get topped so bad) + you call him a pervert idk, squirting (shoutout luocha 😙)
╰─➤ 💌 ₍₁₎ I HAVENT WRITTEN SMUT IN AGESSSS SO PLS BE NICE AND TO MY MUTUALS SORRY THT THIS SHOWS UP ON YOUR DASHBOARD LETS STILL BE FRIENDS PLS 😭
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ᯓ ᡣ𐭩 JING YUAN.
this is a dangerous game when he's involved
as a general, jing yuan is very accustomed to being in charge, of taking charge and ensuring that things happen
and as a man who cares more about the hours outside of his work than during, who can blame him for wanting to commemorate each time that he comes home to you?
he's always been very giving as a lover, that much is true. and as a man with a tendency to be more on the... spontaneous side, you were no stranger to a quickie in a slightly less than convenient location. he just couldn't bear to leave you uncared for, after all.
so really, you should have expected that he would quite literally stoop to this level. one minute he was walking through the front door, you calling out a greeting to him from the sink as you washed some dishes.
and the next minute, he was on his knees behind you, your skirt flipped up over your hips and panties tugged to the side as he began to eat you out with some type of renewed fervour.
it had you slapping one hand over your mouth, the other white-knuckled as you hold on for dear life to the kitchen counter. your legs were very quickly turning to jelly due to his ministrations, the feeling of his tongue fucking into you rendering you unable to form sentences.
and even worse than the sensation was the sound of it- every lick and slurp reverbating through the empty room, every squelch of your pussy making you go a shade darker as jing yuan moaned, the bastard, and delved even further into your pussy. your hips pushed against him, his hands snaking their way around your thighs to keep you pinned in place while he ate you out like his life depended on it.
you bit back a squeal as you felt his tongue flick against your clit before running back through your folds, circling the hole before fucking back into you.
"fuck, i love this pussy so much," he moaned out, pressing a kiss to your inner thigh as he came up for air momentarily. "love comin' home to you every day- you taste so good, so good f'me-"
any attempts at muffling your noises were extinguished as you let out a sob, tears welling up from the pleasure, making you fold over so that your torso rested against the counter. your legs were spread wide by now, giving jing yuan all the access that he needed.
he relinquished one of your thighs in favour of using his fingers to pump into you, curling them just right against that spongy spot that had you shaking like a leaf, feeling the pressure build inside you much quicker than you anticipated.
"fuck- fuck- i can't, 's so good-" you were babbling now, trying in vain to break free or push his head away, the pleasure bordering on too much. it was comically easy how ineffective your attempts to hinder him were,
"you can." his voice was some soothing reprieve, and the warmth of his hands squeezing against your hips helped to ground you as he otherwise brought you to the edge.
your thighs were trembling, barely supporting your weight and you could feel your release fast approaching, though something was holding you back.
"cum f'me." jing yuan's rasped voice is what finally coaxed you to let go, to let that string snap with a final cry as you collapsed fully against the countertop.
always diligent, jing yuan continued to eat you out, making sure not to miss a drop as you spasmed against him, hips finally stilling after you ride out your high.
"bastard." your voice is muffled, head resting on your forearms as your regain your strength. jing yuan merely chuckles, placing a kiss with his wet lips to your inner thigh again, one last jolt of pleasure running through you before he stands, fixing your clothes for you.
"but you love it."
you give him a halfhearted kick in the shin.
ᯓ ᡣ𐭩 SAMPO.
he's the type of man who's best in small doses
the amount of times you get annoyed while he's on another tangent or trying to scam you sell you a product is..... a bit more than infrequent
but there's ways around that
"sampo, do you ever shut up?"
ironically enough, you asking him that made him do just that, pausing for a second to lick his lips as his smile widened, cheshire-like, as you watched the cogs turn in his head.
"no, but for a small standalone price-"
if youuu put a buck in my cup i will shut the fuck up (sorry)
"sampo."
the man cackles, slinging an arm around your shoulders, pulling you in to his side.
"sorry, doll, but a man has to make a living somehow."
you turn to glare at him now. you really weren't in the mood.
"either shut up or i'll make you."
you watch as his smile drops for just a second, his pupils dilating ever so slightly at the underlying hint of what's to come. and bless his heart, the man decided to push his luck.
approximately five minutes later, you were grinding on his face. the only noises that he really made now were occasional grunts and moans as you rocked back and forth, and you decided that you liked him much better when he wasn't talking.
the man with a silver tongue had his uses, after all.
he was so eager to please, too- from what you could tell with the way he was eating you out. if it weren't for the overwhelming pleasure you were feeling, you would be convinced that he was enjoying it more than you. his moans reverberated around your clit as his tongue flicked over and sucked it, leaving you keeling over and your thighs quaking against the sides of his head.
every moan you let out had him eating you out with a renewed fervour, almost desperate for you to reach your high. you let your hand snake into his hair, getting a full handful before yanking on it, hard. sampo whines from the sensation, and you almost miss the muffled plea for you to do it "again".
his fingertips are digging into your thighs almost painfully, keeping you seated firmly against him (not that you were going to move, anyway).
your eyes land on the tent in his boxers, and an idea pops into your head as you snake your hand past his abdomen to pull his waistband down, letting his cock spring free. it looked painfully hard, the tip already leaking pearls of precum, and you spat in your hand before starting to jerk him off, ever so slowly.
he whined again at the pressure, his hips thrusting up to meet your hand, desperate for any sort of friction.
"you're getting off to this, you pervert?" you laughed as he shook his head desperately, still plunging his tongue deep inside you even as his hips bucked wildly. he was already so close, it almost made you laugh.
you yourself were beginning to feel the coil deep within you start to tighten, a telltale sign that your own orgasm was approaching.
"so if i were to just... stop, you wouldn't mind?" to emphasise your point, you loosened your grip on him, grinning to yourself as he whined pathetically.
"hm... that's what i thought."
ᯓ ᡣ𐭩 BLADE.
blade's mean when he eats you out
he's one of those who eats it for his own pleasure, and whether it's until you orgasm once or multiple times, he's not stopping until he's satisfied, overstimulation be damned
"you still alive there?" the man between your thighs snickers at your fucked-out state, not even able to form a sentence to answer him.
how many times had he made you cum by now? six? seven? you'd lost count long ago, and you don't think it mattered much to blade. sometime after the second one, it began to dawn on you that his goal wasn't to simply make you cum then call it a day.
"c'mon, eyes on me." you squeal at the sensation of his hand slapping down against your clit, the raw flesh stinging for a few moments before his hand smooths it over, soothing the skin.
"you can handle one more, right?" you lift your head weakly to meet his ravenous eyes, somehow even hungrier than when he had first started peeling your clothes off. the look in his eyes made a shiver run down your skin, and you gave him a sheepish nod.
"attagirl."
blade's one to keep you on your toes, never knowing just what to expect from him. he ducks his head down, leveling it with your still pulsing hole, and you gasp as you hear, then feel him spit on it.
there's a blunt intrusion as he sinks two of his fingers into you, knuckles deep, crooking them just right to hit that spot inside you. your leg twitches as an automatic response, making the man snicker again.
"you're so sensitive," he coos, and you hide your embarrassed face with your arm. "i bet if i just..." your body seizes up as you cum, again, more sudden than you ever expected as blade presses harder against you. a strangled moan flies out of your mouth, writhing at the pressure.
he's nice enough to let you ride out your high, pathetically grinding your clit against his palm, whimpering at the tenfold sensitivity and the little aftershocks wracking your body.
and when you're finally breathing normally again, you hear his voice break you out of your stupor.
"one more?"
ᯓ ᡣ𐭩 GEPARD.
what he lacks in experience is made up for doubly in enthusiasm
because let's be real, this man is too busy with the silvermane guards to have enough time to be dating and fucking around
but for you? he'd make the time. and he'd learn how to get you off while he's at it, too
"so if you just, slide your fingers in, slowly." gepard follows your instructions dutifully, and even then you still winced at the feeling of his large fingers stretching you out, the slightest of burns already kicking in.
"like this?" he looks up at you, all puppy dog eyes, so eager to learn. his face was too innocent for what he was doing.
"mhmm." you smile down at him, his face rested against one of your thighs as his gaze returns to your cunt, glued to the way it stretches around his digits. he feels you pulse against him and he shudders, trying to hold back for your sake. he was here to learn what you liked, after all.
"and then you kind of... curl them a bit? and move them too." his ministrations are soft to begin with, and even there's still an unmistakeable squelch each time he pumps his fingers into you, the lewdness of it all making him turn pink.
"does that feel good?"
"y-yeah, so good, baby."
he's so close to your pussy, you can feel each time he breathes, his little pants hitting your clit, making you even wetter. the anticipation of it all had you practically squirming where you lay propped up on your elbows, watching him.
his eyes are still transfixed on you, mouth hanging open at the way your hips rolled ever so slightly, meeting each of his shallow thrusts.
"you see that bit above? if you lick it, it'll feel really good f'me." gepard nods, all too eagerly leaning forward, licking a thick stripe from your hole to the clit with his tongue, before starting to flick his tongue against it gingerly.
"yeah, fuck, you're good at this." he hums against you, starting to move his tongue with a little more fervour, his hand still pumping into you. he always had been a fast learner.
he settles into a rhythm, one that has you steadily building the pressure in your core, soft moans escaping your lips.
"just like that, fuuuck," you pant out, letting your head roll back and your eyes closed as you focused on the feeling. it's then when gepard decides to wrap his lips around your clit, sucking ever so deliciously to make your toes curl.
you let out a particularly loud moan at the sensation, one that your ever so perceptive boyfriend latches onto, increasing the pressure in a way that has your eyes rolling to the back of your head.
"geppie m'gonna cum- don't stop-" he obeys your every word, slurping at your cunt with a hunger that sends you over the edge. you convulse, hips raising off of the mattress to buck against his face, his fingers curling around your quaking thighs.
"use my face, darling," he murmurs into you, so eager to please. the way the ridge of his nose bumps against your clit helps you ride out your high, grinding against his mouth a few more times before you finally flop back down against, the bed, limbs turning to jelly.
"no fucking way that was your first time eating someone out." gepard merely grins, wiping some of your juices off of his face before crawling up the bed to meet you.
"'m sure it was, now give me a kiss."
ᯓ ᡣ𐭩 LUOCHA.
your life will be CHANGED after this man eats u out for the first time i just know it
like.. he's got skills. he's a certified munch i know this in my SOULLLLL
"just relax, honey, let me take care of you." his velveteen voice is what has you finally lying back, letting the tension in your body leave you as his nimble fingers hook into the waistband of your panties, sliding them off of your legs ever so tantalisingly.
he groans at the string of slick that stays connected to them- no surprises there as you had been sat on his lap kissing him for the past half an hour- and you covered your face in embarrassment.
"don't go shy on me now, hm?" you peek between your fingers, catching the glint of his emerald eyes, the way his smile widens when he makes eye contact with you from his place between your legs.
"hi, pretty."
"hi."
"we can go as slow as you want, okay? tell me what you're comfortable with." luocha's thumbs rub gentle circles into your thighs, coaxing you to open them and let him settle more comfortably.
"do you want me to touch you?" you nod, watching as luocha's smirks almost imperceptibly.
"use your words, darling." you whine, kicking at him lightly.
"quit teasing me."
"do you want my fingers or my tongue?"
"luocha!" he chuckles, pressing a kiss to the inside of your knee.
"i'm sorry, love, you're just so cute when you're flustered." he presses another kiss to your thigh now, lips inching upwards ever so slowly, holding himself back as he waits for your go-ahead.
"could you... eat me out?" your face feels so warm just from asking the question, but the nerves are quelled as luocha smiles brightly, shifting his weight on his hips to lower himself down closer to you.
"gladly."
there's a few seconds of anticipation, of his breath hitting your core before another entirely new sensation- something wet and muscled sliding against you as luocha licks a flat stripe through your slit. his tongue sharpens, flicking against your clit as he pulls away after his experimental first taste.
you're already feeling something inside you coil in anticipation, and it tightens even more at the blissed out expression on luocha's face.
"you taste divine, my love."
and then he's delving in for more. your usually so composed boyfriend lying flat on his stomach, buried facefirst in your pussy and eating it like a man starved.
the slurping and squelching noises are obscene, echoing off of the walls and filling up the room along with your wails and moans. your head was in the clouds right now, too fucked out to even scream his name. and he hadn't even put his tongue in yet.
as if reading your mind, luocha finally shifts his attention to your hole, his tongue circling it, teasing it open, before he plunges in along with his fingers, the size of them and his fingertips grazing against your g spot bringing you to the verge of tears.
everything just felt so good, and he was going to make you cum hard and fast.
the regular pressure of an impeding orgasm kept building up, more than it regularly would, until it became an entirely new sensation altogether.
"w-wait, baby, i'm gonna pee or something-"
luocha pauses, pupils blown wide with lust as he meets your gaze.
"you're not, honey, just trust me, alright?"
and because it's him, because you'd do just about anything for him right now if it meant continuing to feel this good, you lie back down, feeling him bring you back to that point again.
his fingers are drilling into you at an almost inhuman pace, the sound enough to make you cum, let alone the sensation. his soft lips suction around your clit, warm tongue flicking against your bundle of nerves repeatedly, making you squeal and throw your head back.
"'m gonna-" luocha nods encouragingly, his nose bumping against your clit in a way that has your vision go white as you writhe in ecstasy. there's an odd feeling, of something shooting out of you, and you look down to see a spray of clear liquid. luocha's fingers rub against your pusy frantically, making you writhe again, prolonging your orgasm as he milks you for every last drop.
you finally come back down to earth, vaguely feeling a warm wet cloth wipe away at you, at the mess you had made.
and luocha's gazing at you with nothing but adoration, a pussydrunk smile on his lips.
"aren't you glad you trusted me, love?"
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𝜗𝜚 honkai star rail masterlist
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saudadeko · 1 year ago
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ADHD tips from a girlie who was diagnosed in her late twenties and has had little to no support since and is being so brave about it:
1) Make it easy, make it accessible, and make it appealing. If anything this is the most important thing, all tips going forward are based around this concept.
2) That thing you think would help you but you haven’t bought/done it yet because you’re technically surviving without it? Buy it, you need it. It doesn’t matter if people around you might think it’s wasteful or that you’re lazy, you’re not, just do it, trust me.
3) Expanding on tip #2, if you’re like me and eggs are your main source of protein because they’re quick and easy and feeding yourself is a near insurmountable task- buy yourself an electric egg cooker, make a bunch of hard boiled eggs and keep them in your fridge for quick and easy protein to add to any meal (handful of crackers, a hard boiled egg and a banana? 5 star meal right there. Or mash them up with some mayo for egg salad sandwiches). Other easy proteins include: potstickers (put them in instant ramen), edamame (they have microwaveable snack packs), chickpeas (put in salads!), beans (can of beans microwaved with shredded cheese and some tortilla chips), peanut butter (with crackers, apple and cheese, adult lunchable style), and tofu (cut into cubes, throw them into a ziplock with some seasoning and potato starch, shake that shit up and bake it until crispy).
4) Spend a little extra (if you are able) on daily use items that excite you, it will make you more likely to remember/want to do said daily task. For example: the only reason I remember to use sunscreen is because I bought some fancy japanese sunscreen that smells like roses so I get excited to use it, same for laundry detergent and body wash! there’s a gajillion different body wash scents out there, switch it up!
5) If there’s a task you continuously struggle with take a moment to think about which part of the task is making it difficult, it could be something even as small as “I don’t put my dirty clothes in the hamper because my hamper has a lid on it and lifting the lid is one step too many-”, sounds a little stupid huh? But trust your gut, it’s not stupid if it works. See tip #2 and BUY A HAMPER WITHOUT A LID.
6) If you are having trouble starting a task, break the task down further, sometimes the way I start a task is just by going “Ok step 1) stand up-“ and so forth. Don’t worry about the task as a whole just take it one step at a time.
7) If you’re halfway through a task and have to stop, leave it out. All this, “Put things away when you’re done with them.” is bullshit. you will be much more likely to finish the task if restarting it is easier because you left it out plus it’s a visual reminder. You can also create faux deadlines like “I gotta finish this project before my friend comes over on tuesday because after I finish it I can clean off the dinner table.” etc.
8) It’s okay to outsource tasks and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise, humans are designed to ask for, and to require help (what do babies do when they’re first born?? cry for help!!) ask for help and receive help without shame, if it makes your life better, you are WINNING.
9) If you have one big overwhelming task that you think you need to get done before anything else, but you feel motivated to do other tasks, do those other tasks first, it’s okay. Otherwise in all likelihood (at least in my case) you’ll put everything off until the last minute and then have to do said overwhelming task and those other tasks won’t get done at all. Doing those smaller tasks also lowers the mental load and you can use them as a motivation launch pad to tackle bigger things.
10) If you notice you tend to not put something away/forget to do something, perhaps consider moving and storing the item closer to where it ultimately ends up or where you are more likely to see it. For example, my makeup, pills, and mail are all stored on my desk because that’s where I tend to do my makeup, take my pills and deal with my mail. I used to store my pills in my bathroom medicine cabinet but all too often I would forget because they weren’t in my line of sight. Now that they’re on my desk, I have multiple chances per day to pass by them, go “oh I gotta take those.” and take them.
11) Open storage, open storage, OPEN STORAGE.
12) Motivation can look like all kinds of things. sometimes the only reason I get out of bed is because I remember I have a fun snack and I get to go eat it if I get up. It’s okay to lean into those simple “animal-brain” type motivators, you’ll eat because then you can use that fun new kitchen gadget you got a daiso? Neat. you’ll shower because then you can paint your nails that fun new color you got? Fantastic. You’ll go to the dmv and do that annoying thing because you’ll take yourself out for boba after? Superb. Lean-IN to those small motivators, they aren’t stupid or childish, they are VITAL.
13) Don’t buy into the cult of “if it’s worth doing, do it properly” it’s guaranteed to set you up for failure. If it’s worth doing, do it in whatever capacity you are able to. I put sunscreen on once a day because that’s fucking better than not doing it at all and I sure as all hell will fail at reapplying it multiple times a day. If it’s worth doing, do it half-assed babieeee.
Go forth and prosper!!! xoxo ✌️🩵
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sukunasteeth · 9 months ago
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Marks
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Sukuna doesn't understand the hold you have on him.
He's never particularly been a people person. In fact, people annoyed him. This has held true ever since he was a child with his twin brother, Yuji. That is, until Yuji brought you home one fateful day in middle school, claiming to have met a new friend. 
You, with your sweet little smile, and your boundlessly generous heart. You with your giggle that chimes through his darkened soul like a golden bell. With the innocent rosy lips that he'd dreamed of having his first kiss with until high school, when it finally came to fruition. You had been irrevocably his ever since then, and it had been almost seven years.
So why does it still feel like you're the one with all the power here?
Why does it feel like you could create a monster out of him if you truly wanted to? Why does it feel like he's constantly at your beck and call? Why are you the one person on this green earth that reduces him to the feeling of an emotion as pathetic as helplessness?
"'Kuna...hurts..."
He'll admit, he takes it out on you.
Like now, when you're lying naked beneath him (his favorite spot to have you in) and begging him to take it easy on you. He's got you covered in sweat, exerting you to your ultimate limit. He loved to see you train until failure, after all. Adored the way your legs quivered when he relentlessly made you keep riding him, despite your exhaustion. Cooed at the way you begged him to be gentle, even though he knows you prefer it rough. You were quick to submit when he had you behind closed doors, despite how independent you appeared outside of them. Sukuna knew you better. Knew how much you loved following his direction. Receiving his praise.
You were lucky you were such a good girl.
Sukuna was torturing you now already, and you hadn't even disobeyed him. He can't imagine what he would do if you were unruly. Actually, he can. And the thought has him salivating even more as he sucks relentlessly at the nape of your neck. You're covered in marks from his teeth or the raw scrape of his tongue. Your throat has been tormented by his worship to the extent that he's even broken skin in the spots where he can feel your pulse beneath his lips.
Even Sukuna has to admit that you didn't deserve this abuse. You hadn't done a thing out of line, besides selfishly tearing the heart out of his chest for good. It was yours now.
The thought makes him growl against you.
God, you weren't even trying.
Your victory over him was so effortless.
It pissed him off.
He doesn't realize that he's bitten you particularly hard until you're suddenly recoiling away, burrowing yourself into his pillows with a small yelp. Your hand has sprung up to press your palm over Sukuna's mouth in some weak attempt at getting him to stop. Your other hand holds your throat as you purse your lips at him, which have also seen a good amount of Sukuna's biting that day.
You looked good in his teeth marks, what can he say?
"Are you mad or something?" You're blinking up at him like a confused little deer. Sukuna can't help that it makes him hungry. You were a perfect prey to him and he would be chasing you to the end of this lifetime. He could tell solely in the way that your stupid little nickname for him makes his heartstrings snap.
He takes a frustrated breath through his nose over your hand, nipping at your fingers over his mouth like a muzzled dog. Before you can pull them away, he's grasping your wrist tightly, his unforgiving grip a warning in itself. Easily, he pins it to the side of your head, rendering you halfway useless.
"Don't interrupt." He murmurs, his gaze burning into yours.
A helpless sob escapes you, but otherwise you stop trying to squirm away from him. You allow the onslaught to continue without a peep, bracing yourself each and every time a new hickey is being bruised into your skin. He doesn't offer you any words in terms of praise, but his grip on your wrist eventually loosens a bit. He never fully lets you go, though.
While he appreciates your cooperation, you eventually go almost too quiet and Sukuna thinks for a moment that maybe he's pushed you too far. He pulls away from your neck to look at you, finding your pink little face screwed up in an intense mixture of pleasure and agony. He feels a content smile spread across his face but it's cut short when his eyes hone in on your lips, which you're currently biting hard enough to draw blood from.
His free hand reaches up and grasps your chin, pressing his thumb below your bottom lip and forcing you to relinquish it. You blink slowly, your logical brain having exhausted itself up until this point. You easily let him pry your teeth apart, panting in his grasp. 
"Mouth. Open." He commands.
You squirm in your overwhelming frustration, whining. "It hurts, 'Kuna!"
Sukuna hums in a mock sympathy, watching you suffer with a satisfied grin. You would have these marks for weeks. There were so many now, some more intense than others, and he wasn't even close to being done with you.
"You're being cruel." You accuse, watching your own hardship twinkle back at you in the reflection of his eyes. Your pout is purple and bruised from your attempts to keep quiet. Sukuna leans in closer and presses the sweetest kiss to your lips, as soft as the brush of a feather.
What was cruel was the fact that you had broken down everything Sukuna had ever known about himself. His strength was putty at your feet. His hatred for the world was a joke in your presence. His pride, a mere memory at the touch of your fingertips against his soul.
"You think this is cruel?" He whispers, mocking you. His voice is the taunt of a devilish trickster. "I think I've been going too easy on you. Allow me to rectify that."
There really is no curse more cruel than love.
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slushycoookie · 3 months ago
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Kinktober Day 1 ~ Wardrobe Malfunction
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Logan Howlett x Fem! Reader
Summary: Your bikini top suddenly falls off at the beach and Logan sees you. Minors DNI!
A/N: Happy first day of Kinktober! I'm very excited, I hope you all enjoy!
*✧・゚: Next
Kinktober '24 Masterlist
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You never thought something like this would happen to you.
Your bikini top, the one whose string you triple-knotted to make sure it stayed on, came off.
The horror on your face was apparent when a breeze connected to your chest and the fabric attached to your skin disappeared. What’s even worse was that your top fell off right in front of Logan, a man you were crushing on so hard it was ridiculous.
You two were in the water, basking in the sun. It turned to a playful fight, droplets clinging to you as Logan kept attacking you with water. The fight led to him grabbing you and tossing you over his shoulder. When you came up for air, that’s when it happened.
You know he saw you. Your breasts in his line of sight, soaked in that seawater. His eyes were almost out of their sockets with how long he stared at you. You quickly covered yourself up with your arms, seeing your top floating in the water before grabbing it, rushing to get out.
“Where are ya going?” Logan shouted from behind you.
You didn’t answer but heard his rushing footsteps. The rest of the team gawked at the two of you when you ran across the beach—feet dusted with sand, going to the nearest cabana. You felt flustered, face burning up. Now, you’ve made everything awkward. Your relationship with Logan, built on respect and genuine care, was gone. All because your top decided to be complicated.
Logan called your name outside and your muscles tensed.
“You okay?”
No, he just saw your breasts on full display. You were far from okay.
“I’m fine. Go back to the others.”
So you can forget that it ever happened.
“Well, don’t ya need help putting that back on?”
You froze, remembering that your top had four strings. Ororo helped you tie the one across your back the first time.
“Okay, just be quick.”
Your back was still towards him, not wanting to look him in the eye. You tried not to focus on his large, slightly wrinkled hands when he helped you with your top—carefully tying the string against your back. As you handed him the strings to go around your neck, your fingertips brushed along his.
“I’m sorry.” You started apologizing: “I thought the top was tied on tight.”
“It’s alright. Not the first pair I’ve seen before.” You roll your eyes, embarrassment quickly fading away as you remember his conquests. “But they’re the best ones I’ve seen so far.”
You forced out a laugh, “Don’t make me kick you out.”
“I’m serious.” When you turn around, his lowered eyes search your face for any hint to show you were uncomfortable. You weren’t. “I wish I could’ve seen them under different circumstances but fuck, I’m glad I did.”
“What’s the different circumstances?”
Logan glances towards the entrance before going back to you. “In my bed. After I take you out on a few dates.”
“Oh.” You blink at the subtle confession. “Didn’t think you’d last after one date.”
His mouth twitches in amusement, “With someone like you, I can.”
Maybe you were glad that your top did what it did, otherwise you would’ve spent another day pining for Logan. Now, it was clear he also had the hots for you, an idea appeared in your head.
“Wanna see them again?”
Logan let out a low breath and a curt nod. You reach behind you, untying the knot he made. Logan grabbed your top, stuffing it in his pockets, eyes never leaving your exposed chest.
“Fuck me. Look at you…”
His eyes search your breasts. How they sat so prettily, almost shining due to minuscule drops of water on your skin. The way Logan stared at you made your stomach twist. He stepped closer, raising his hand with an urge to touch, not before asking for permission.
You barely got the ‘yes’ out when he’s on you. Logan cupped your breast, groaning at how perfectly you fit in his palm. You grip his shoulder when he leans down and capture your lips in a kiss.
It’s hot and heavy as your tongues slide amongst each other. Logan’s still playing with your breast, flicking the nipple with his thumb. He swallows whatever noises come out of you, not wanting to alert the rest of the team. Your hand digs into his messy hair when he parts to kiss your neck. You warn him not to mark you because you don’t want to be bombarded with questions when you two return home.
Logan listens, only placing kisses on you, trailing down to your chest. The source that started everything. You tug on his hair when he captures a breast in his mouth. While doing so, his arm goes under your bottom to pick you up. The action makes you gasp, your legs wrapping around his waist.
You hold Logan’s face close to you as he’s sucking on your nipple, determined to replace the seawater with his saliva. He lets out another groan when switching to your other breast, wanting to do this to you all day. Your moans let him know you didn’t want him to stop.
“Hey? You two okay in there?”
Scott called, and you tugged on Logan’s hair to get him to stop. “Yeah! We’re fine. We’re about to come out!”
“Okay...”
After hearing Scott walk away from the cabana, Logan growls against your breasts.
“Fucking boy scout.”
You snort, kissing the top of his head, “We can continue when we get back.”
Logan grunts, licking at the valley of your breasts before helping you get down. He ties up your top again and walks you out.
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If anyone wants to be tagged for the other days, let me know! Please make sure you have your age in your bio, intro post, any place that I can see.
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