#not so lucky after all
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the thing about art is that it was always supposed to be about us, about the human-ness of us, the impossible and beautiful reality that we (for centuries) have stood still, transfixed by music. that we can close our eyes and cry about the same book passage; the events of which aren't real and never happened. theatre in shakespeare's time was as real as it is now; we all laugh at the same cue (pursued by bear), separated hundreds of years apart.
three years ago my housemates were jamming outdoors, just messing around with their instruments, mostly just making noise. our neighbors - shy, cautious, a little sheepish - sat down and started playing. i don't really know how it happened; i was somehow in charge of dancing, barefoot and laughing - but i looked up, and our yard was full of people. kids stacked on the shoulders of parents. old couples holding hands. someone had brought sidewalk chalk; our front walk became a riot of color. someone ran in with a flute and played the most astounding solo i've ever heard in my life, upright and wiggling, skipping as she did so. she only paused because the violin player was kicking his heels up and she was laughing too hard to continue.
two weeks ago my friend and i met in the basement of her apartment complex so she could work out a piece of choreography. we have a language barrier - i'm not as good at ASL as i'd like to be (i'm still learning!) so we communicate mostly through the notes app and this strange secret language of dancers - we have the same movement vocabulary. the two of us cracking jokes at each other, giggling. there were kids in the basement too, who had been playing soccer until we took up the far corner of the room. one by one they made their slow way over like feral cats - they laid down, belly-flat against the floor, just watching. my friend and i were not in tutus - we were in slouchy shirts and leggings and socks. nothing fancy. but when i asked the kids would you like to dance too? they were immediately on their feet and spinning. i love when people dance with abandon, the wild and leggy fervor of childhood. i think it is gorgeous.
their adults showed up eventually, and a few of them said hey, let's not bother the nice ladies. but they weren't bothering us, they were just having fun - so. a few of the adults started dancing awkwardly along, and then most of the adults. someone brought down a better sound system. someone opened a watermelon and started handing out slices. it was 8 PM on a tuesday and nothing about that day was particularly special; we might as well party.
one time i hosted a free "paint along party" and about 20 adults worked quietly while i taught them how to paint nessie. one time i taught community dance classes and so many people showed up we had to move the whole thing outside. we used chairs and coatracks to balance. one time i showed up to a random band playing in a random location, and the whole thing got packed so quickly we had to open every door and window in the place.
i don't think i can tell you how much people want to be making art and engaging with art. they want to, desperately. so many people would be stunning artists, but they are lied to and told from a very young age that art only matters if it is planned, purposeful, beautiful. that if you have an idea, you need to be able to express it perfectly. this is not true. you don't get only 1 chance to communicate. you can spend a lifetime trying to display exactly 1 thing you can never quite language. you can just express the "!!??!!!"-ing-ness of being alive; that is something none of us really have a full grasp on creating. and even when we can't make what we want - god, it feels fucking good to try. and even just enjoying other artists - art inherently rewards the act of participating.
i wasn't raised wealthy. whenever i make a post about art, someone inevitably says something along the lines of well some of us aren't that lucky. i am not lucky; i am dedicated. i have a chronic condition, my hands are constantly in pain. i am not neurotypical, nor was i raised safe. i worked 5-7 jobs while some of these memories happened. i chose art because it mattered to me more than anything on this fucking planet - i would work 80 hours a week just so i could afford to write in 3 of them.
and i am still telling you - if you are called to make art, you are called to the part of you that is human. you do not have to be good at it. you do not have to have enormous amounts of privilege. you can just... give yourself permission. you can just say i'm going to make something now and then - go out and make it. raquel it won't be good though that is okay, i don't make good things every time either. besides. who decides what good even is?
you weren't called to make something because you wanted it to be good, you were called to make something because it is a basic instinct. you were taught to judge its worth and over-value perfection. you are doing something impossible. a god's ability: from nothing springs creation.
a few months ago i found a piece of sidewalk chalk and started drawing. within an hour i had somehow collected a small classroom of young children. their adults often brought their own chalk. i looked up and about fifteen families had joined me from around the block. we drew scrangly unicorns and messed up flowers and one girl asked me to draw charizard. i am not good at drawing. i basically drew an orb with wings. you would have thought i drew her the mona lisa. she dragged her mother over and pointed and said look! look what she drew for me and, in the moment, i admit i flinched (sorry, i don't -). but the mother just grinned at me. he's beautiful. and then she sat down and started drawing.
someone took a picture of it. it was in the local newspaper. the summary underneath said joyful and spontaneous artwork from local artists springs up in public gallery. in the picture, a little girl covered in chalk dust has her head thrown back, delighted. laughing.
#writeblr#warm up#this is longer than i wanted i really considered removing that part about myself and what i went thru#but i think it really fucking bothers me that EVERY time i talk about being an artist#ppl assume i just like. had the skill and ability to drop everything and pay for grad school.#like sir i grew up poor. my house wasn't a safe space. i gave up a FREE RIDE TO LAW SCHOOL. for THIS. bc i chose it.#was it fucking hard? was i choosing the hard thing?? yes.#but we need to stop seeing artists as lazy layabouts that can ''afford'' to just ''sit around and create''#when MANY - if not MOST - of us are NOT like that. we have to work our fucking ASSES off. hard work. long and hard work#part of valuing artists is recognizing the amount we sacrifice to make our art. bc it doesn't just#like HAPPEN to us. also btw it rarely has anything to do with true talent.#speaking as someone with a chronic condition i hate when ppl are like u have it easy. like actively as i'm writing this my hands r#ACTIVELY hurting me. i haven't been posting bc my left hand was curled in a claw for the last week#this isn't fucking luck. after a certain point it's not even TALENT. it's dedication & sacrifice.#''u get to flounce around and do nothing with ur life'' is a narrative that is a direct result of capitalism#imagine if we said that about literally any other profession.#''oh so u give up 10 yrs of ur life to be a doctor? u sacrifice having a social life and u get SUPER in debt?#u need to work countless hours and it will often be thankless? well i wish i was that lucky''#we should be applying that logic to landlords ONLY#''oh ur mom and dad gave u the money to buy a house? and all u did was paint it white and rent it? huh.''
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The loser Forever Number Two Squad is trying out lottery. It goes about as well as you'd expect.
I don't know, I love those three. I feel like they'd have a good dynamic together. It's a shame there's, like, no fanfiction whatsoever about those three. (Yes this is a shameless request to all you writers out there.)
#WE CAUGHT UP#after that it's all new art!#they try but they can't#it's a curse#their only luck is that their lucky friends are so kind and caring#mello's drawings#twisted wonderland#twst#n2 squad#forevernumbertwosquad#forevernumbertwogang#jamil viper#leona kingscholar#vil schoenheit#kalim al asim#rook hunt#lottery#my art#art
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Quick scribble cos I couldnāt get blushing Emmy out of my head. Heās thinking about stuff.
#dragon age#dragon age the veilguard#DAtV#Emmrich volkarin#my art#just the thought of him becoming all giddy at the idea of romance again#esp at his age#being calm and collected and professional in day to day stuff but then just daydreaming about rook after hours#wondering where they find the attraction#how heās so lucky and if this is real#being so distracted that he canāt focus on finishing his books#oh heās smitten
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ātrans men donāt have any real safety concerns to worry aboutā i canāt wear a mask when i go into public bathrooms even though iām higher risk and bathrooms are some of the easiest places to get sick because i donāt reliably pass when my facial hair is covered and i canāt risk not passing when i use the menās room, but i also canāt just use the womenās room for safety anymore because i donāt reliably pass as either binary gender anymore. so my only options are to risk getting sick, take my chances with the consequences of not passing, or just never use the bathroom in public (which has its own health risks).
and today, it almost didnāt even matter that i was putting myself in danger to ensure that i passed because, thanks to a faulty lock and a man who didnāt think to knock, i came very close to having my half-naked body exposed to a bathroom full of cis men. if i hadnāt been holding my coat on my lap because there was nowhere in the stall to put it, every single guy waiting in the (very crowded) bathroom wouldāve seen that i didnāt have a dick. how well do you think that wouldāve gone for me? my moneyās on Not Well At All.
#it took me a solid hour to stop shaking after#like yeah maybe the guy who opened the door wouldāve have done anything but what about all the other guys?#i feel like the chances that None of those guys wouldāve had a problem with trans people is pretty low#iām so fucking lucky it didnāt happen but even coming that close was Terrifying#starting to use the menās room consistently isā¦a time#but when i do it right i get less weird looks than in the womenās room so itās not like thereās a better option#transandrophobia#transandromisia#transmisandry#virilmisia#virilphobia#anti transmasculinity#transmascphobia#trans men#transmascs
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Marc Revelado Documentary clip and English transcript
#motogp#rosquez#marc marquez#valentino rossi#vr46#mm93#my amazing friend translated it for me!!!!#she said marc was stuttering so bad esp at the beginning so after a few sentences she gave up trying to add that to the transcript..#just know he was so nervous#i wonder why!!!!#keeps screaming at this for the rest of the day i owe her my life my everything#LIKE.. THE INTERVIEWER ASKING IF THEY'D HAVE DINNER#TALK AGAIN#OR LAUGH OH MY GOD AUGHHHHHH PLEASEEEE WE ALL WANT U GUYS SO BAD PLEASE#PLEASE KISS AND MAKE UP#this is so fuckin sad just marc being nervous and somber saying he was lucky and then not so lucky... and it's not up to him#his sad smile#i gotta go cry
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Crowned Prince Shouto who is so very much in love with you, even if it did take a while to come around after the arranged marriage occurred.
Crowned Prince Shouto whose brow creases and eyes twitch every time people in high court mock how plain you are under hushed breaths.
Crowned Prince Shouto who gets absolutely sloshed at a royal banquet to try and drown his anger when he hears a rumor going around that his marriage is unconsummated due to finding you so repulsive before storming off to find you.
Royal Advisor Izuku who rushes off to try and follow, only to hear a shriek coming from your room. When scrambling to investigate if you're okay he finds his master on his knees absolutely devouring your cunt while your receiving chamber door remains open a crack.
#and I mean the man would go at it till your crying out his name#cause he doesn't give two fucks about what it means to his decorum or repuatation#he's gotta prove a point to his people that he's lucky to have you every single day and night!#and Izuku understands the power play going on here#knows shouto ain't dumb and purposefully left that door open and purposefully took you in your receiving chamber instead of your bedroom#where there would be more privacy#the only thing now is#does Izuku stay and watch? or does he scamper away and try and forget how your face looked contorted in pleasure?#all he knows is he won't be able to meet you eye for a long while#and all I know is that those rumors stop after that night for SURE#i'm being bold on the dash today#thought has been running rampant in my mind for HOURS#so here we are#š®.the peddler mumbles#shouto todoroki#shouto x reader#bnha shouto#shouto smut
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Dc x Dp Prompt #3
Immortal Ghost King Au:
Daniel Fenton was crowned as High King Phantom of the Infinite Realms on his 16th birthday. He knew many were opposed to him being crowned at such a young age (he was too), but the Realms had gone too long without a ruler and it was getting restless.
The Realms were sentient to some extent. It can not run itself as it has no form but it chooses a host, a King if you will, to fulfill its wishes. It may have lived on an entire millennia without a ruler, but it was only out of sheer luck and the contributions of countless gods that it had survived. The Infinite Realms needed a King and Danny Phantom was the only contender.
So the people were ignored and their boy king was crowned. However Phantom was young and naive, a child as both a human and a ghost. Even worse, he knew nothing about being a king. But the little godling would learn and learn he did.
Most kings were taught before they were coronated, but Danny had no such privilege. His coronation came and left with the wind. His private lessons overshadowed any thoughts he had left of mortal schooling. And Danny gave up on living a normal human life.
That last part was perhaps the easiest for Danny. Amity Park was already considered too liminal for them to have any āsentienceā. The GIW had all but declared war on the Realms with their continuous violent actions upon his people and the land itself.
It wasnāt difficult for Amity to give up their ārightsā and āhumanityā either. They said good riddance to the world that never helped them, to the heroes that ignored their cries for help. And they bowed to Phantom, declaring him their King, just as he declared them citizens of the Infinite Realms.
He welcomed his liminals with open arms, vowing to protect them from any harm that would come their way, just as he would with any of his other citizens. He gave them a home in the Realms, an island- no a haunt of their own should they wish to truly reject the land of the living, and they accepted. Not many wanted to try their luck against the human government.
But with a God, no, their King on their side, they knew their safety and happiness was all but assured. After all, it was Phantom who protected them even as they turned their own backs at him. It was Phantom who fought against foes that could have erased him from existence.
And of course it was Phantom who would now receive any and all support he could ever want and need should he declare war against the humans of Earth. No, there was no need for people of the Infinite Realms to worry. High King Phantom was a God after all. It was only ever his right to exact divine punishment onto those who opposed and threatened his will. It was not their fault if the humans actively went against his will. No, the humans had no one but themselves to blame for whatever came for them.
#dc x dp#dp x dc#dc x dp prompt#dp x dc prompt#the infinite realms is home to more than just ghosts#like demons and other things too#it uses the king as its host to ensure its peopleās survival and in turn makes the king a god#pariah dark went against the realms will#so he was sealed away and not killed because you can not kill an already dead god#the people of the realms were skeptical of having such a young king#but Dannyās a quick learner and turned out to be really good#amity park vs GIW wouldnāt be the first war heās led#Danny gave himself a god complex bc people respect him more that way#itās a mask he only uses outside of the realms#heās acts normally when heās with citizens of the realms#can a god even have a god complex??#amity park moved to the infinite realms after the GIW tried killing them all#JL and JLD are struggling trying to find a way to negotiate a peace agreement#but amity park feels abandoned and spiteful so they refuse#lucky for the JL that itās Phantom whoās in charge#or maybe thatās the reason theyāre not so lucky#amity found out Danny was a god and ran with it#this might be a good way to like make this into an arranged marriage au with a person of your choice#make Danny as old or as young as you want#Danny will do what he needs to make sure his people are safe and happy
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comparison of my beloved 2008 pumpkin kitty (right) vs the vault pumpkin kitty (left) i received pre-stuffed. I find it super interesting the design changes that were made, she has a shorter tail and an overall smaller body, and bigger eyes. her fur is not as soft but pretty close!
also, they REALLY overstuffed her so sheās kind ofā¦bulgey in her face right now haha. Iām gonna restuff her super floppy with silky polyfil like I did for my 2008 Pumpkin Cat (literally her name) and i do think that will fix her face ^_^ overall i think they did a decent job! the fur color is a perfect match! (the orange is much gentler and pastel and almost pinker irl)
#i was lucky to get my original pumpkin kitty of ebay for $20 in 2016#sheās so beloved to me. my favorite build a bear of all time for sure <3#i think restuffing the new one will help a lot#iāll post pics of what sheās like after i do that!#sorry the photo looks wack it is IMPOSSIBLE to capture the orange#my plush
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day 169
this is it, the dynamic
#day 169#year 5#aradia megido#kanaya maryam#homestuck#arakan#based largely on their first pesterlog#kanaya is so. FUCKING condescending to her and its funny#actually edit: i added the link to the page just read it#kanaya being a lil shit is my favorite for her actually#and aradia being like 0h n0t this shit again#like its just so!!!!!!#funny but also like KIND OF GENUINELY MEAN FOR NO REASON fjdhjdhd#its LITERALLY just kanaya dropping into aradias dms to be like#Hey Bestie Just A Reminder That You Should Feel A Little Bit Guilty About Everything That Happens From Here On Out#Even Though It Is Basically Inevitable#Lucky For You Though I Am Going To Be Very Gracious And Clean Up After Whatever Dumb Shit You Are About To Pull With This Game#like GIRL WHAT IS UR DAMAGE FKDHSKHDGD im obsessed#i mean obviously she has some fucked up feelings internally about participating in a game that ends the world#i wonder if she feels guilty herself for letting aradia and sollux pull half the code from her set of frog ruins#like. maybe shes so guilt trippy about it because she wants to convince herself that all the blame can be put on aradia#and that if she voices her disapproval OF aradias actions then shes like. on record as being Right About The Situation#but ALSO if she is sooo magnanimous and forgiving about it then maybe nobody has to be punished for all of it (not even herself)#idk IDK. i just think its fascinating as a kanaya character moment especially as one of her earliest conversations
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Mihawk and the Red Haired Pirates
-Look I don't know what to tell you, Mihawk's epithet is literally Hawkeyes meaning he is world-renowned for his eyesight meaning that he'd probably make a good sharpshooter. And maybe Yasopp decides to test this theory with a little friendly competition. And after giving Mihawk a quick intro into how guns work, maybe Yasopp had to pull out every trick there is in the book to narrowly avoid losing to said Hawkeyes, who as it turns out is indeed very good at hitting targets and who had literally just learned how to cock a gun not even 30 minutes ago. But who's to say what actually happened, the day of November 25th at 2:35pm? Certainly not Yasopp, the record clearly shows he is undefeated.
-Once a year Ben and Mihawk go on a little trip just the two of them. They act like it's just so they can shit-talk Shanks but actually, they just go fishing somewhere in the middle of the ocean and drink horribly overpriced and fancy alcohol. Look Benn loves his crew, and would die for them but also if he doesn't get at least a week to himself once every year he'd kill them all himself. He deserves nice things and a little peace and fucking quiet and not being constantly inundated with the whims of a man child and Mihawk's the closest he's ever gonna get to a friend with taste, and he travels alone with a bunch of fancy wine. Sue the man. Mihawk who would rather nap is fine to let someone else sail his overgrown raft against the annoyingly ever-changing grandline for a week or two.
-Wouldn't it be cute if Mihawk learned a lot of his fancier cooking techniques from Roux? Like he knew how to cook to survive but watching Roux is how he learned to like properly dice vegetables and that eating fish prepared the same way three times a day is not infact a life he would like to lead. This was of course less cute to Lucky Roux who in the beginning had no clue what was happening and only felt the weight of Mihawk's otherworldly stare on the back of his neck as he handled knives. (he defiantly for at least a little bit, thought Mihawk had a knife fetish. which, he's not entirely wrong)
-To Building Snake (who I just learned is the RHP's navigator) Mihawk might as well be a modern-day miracle. In his eyes, Mihawk's sailing is proof that god exists, because only divine intervention can explain how this man ever gets anywhere never mind on time or early even. Building Snake is pretty sure he owns neither a map nor a log pose and he has never actually seen the sails of Mihawk's pretend ship unfurled or in use. Actually, he has never seen Mihawk do anything but sit menacingly on the throne in the middle of the boat, which why? If you think about it for even a second longer that 2 minutes how Mihawk "sails" anywhere breaks every law of physics and somehow even the concept of geography. Building Snake would like to dissect him and study him under a microscope but knows the boss would disapprove.
#Shanks of course loves watching Mihawk interact with his crew it's essentially hoping your family doesn't scare away your boyfriend#the downside is that he thinks that the crew might like mihawk more than him. which rude#I don't know I've just been think a lot about what Mihawk's interactions with the rhps would be like#and so I decided to just compile some of y favorite thoughs#because no building snake is valid how does Mihawk sail anywhere without the use of you know sails#Also I do like the idea that Mihawk's extravagence is a very deliberate effort to give himself fancy things he couldn't have as a child#They all try to petition him to join their crew after the warlords disband which is the deciding reason why Mihawk accepts crocodile's offe#Cause he ālikesā them sure but living with them would probably kill him#hawkeye mihawk#one piece#throwing thoughts to the void#dracule mihawk#op#mishanks#shanks#red haired shanks#benn beckman#akagami no shanks#yasopp#red hair pirates#red haired pirates#lucky roux#akataka#one piece funny#one piece headcanons#red hair shanks
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Commission for @jaxinkh
Ooooo lookin fiIIINE Jason Todd! Ahhh This new year has been going better than I'd ever hoped it could!~ Ahh You waited so long Jaxinkh, Thank you for being so patient- I'm most definitely putting a disclaimer on my next commission page that the times they may take may vary wildly thanks to my health o(*ļæ£ā½ļæ£*)ć
#Batman#Wayne Family Adventures#Jason Todd#Commission#Okkennymay#jaxinkh#Painted commission#JUST ONE MORE CLIENT AND I'LL HAVE FINALLY REACHED YOU MARCUS! WOOOOOOOO#after so so so many months#goodness I've been so lucky to have the most patient friends and clients in the world ;w; You guys are the best#thank you for not getting angry at me for things taking so long-It's something I fear greatly#But time and time again i'm met with kindness and understanding it's finally dawning on me that I don't have to be so afraid all the time
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last call for the silver artbook!! we are currently at 78 orders, only 22 away from a final patch addition š both stores close at 11:59pm EST, reach out for any q's!
#cannot possibly thank everyone enough for all the support. im so serious im blown away. like from my perspective?#i come from a background in zines. i am one single creator who made this so i only have one audience. silver isnt a major character#i dont have a pre-existing store and it's a solo item idk im just HONORED im so touched i feel light. so excited for fulfillment#i get to do QUALITY CONTROL AGAIN!!!! <3 <3 <3 MY BELOVED!!!! im working w another manu to add to my lil list!!!#aughhh if i get to do the patches??? i LOVE that manu theyre soso sweet. weeping and wailing. we shall seeeee#twst#twisted wonderland#twst silver#oh also i hope everyone is okay after the hurricane!!! i'm in atlanta and we got EXTREMELY lucky when it dodged us for the most part
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this is not a comprehensive list
#in order from left to right (with explanations):#k on#(self explanatory. definition of moe.)#a place further than the universe#(theyre at least a little insane for going all the way to antarctica for funsies)#bocchi the rock#(good mix of insane and sweet. most of the insane parts come from bocchi herself)#nichijou#(literally so much happened all the time)#and asobi asobase#(they did do arson)#i haven't seen azumanga daioh or yuru camp and i never finished lucky star#but based on what i know abt the first two id put it... azumanga between bocchi and nichijou. and yuru camp with or after k on#and from what i remember abt lucky star its also just after k on#a bit quirkier but nothing ever really happens in it. as far as i watched. which is why i stopped watching LOL#but thats all assumptions and second hand knowledge so i figured i shouldnt actually include them unless i was SURE#i also thought abt putting asteroid in love in here too but that one is a bit more niche so i left it out#i also excluded any idol shows bc that feels like a different category. and would make this too long#sorry zombieland saga and love live....#i also excluded straight up yuri. this is more abt Hanging Out than romance. but some is allowed as long as its not the focal point#like kita in btr. shes very yuri but the show isnt about that#you could probably also put is the order a rabbit on here but idr much from that. i think i watched like 3 episodes umm 100 years ago#i also thought abt putting the highschool girls segments from daily lives of highschool boys here. but they arent in most of the show#tho theyd probably go between nichijou and asobi asobase. or maybe on par w nichijou#that one girl did almost kill the other two with a rock as im sure youve all seen
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watching the sunrise in paradise
@ahollowgrave
#watching the sun rise with your hyur girlfriend on your lap#we should all be so lucky ā”#ffxiv screenshots#gposers#ffxiv gpose#lia amelune#odette hollows#lia x odette#wanted to pose something soft and sweet#(then odette climbed her dragoon mommy mountain after)#also you only get one angle cuz someone's face melted
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early hours of the AM and i am lying awake thinking about how, when anakin left tatooine, there was no-one left who didnāt love him based on either what he represented to them or what he might become - be it symbol of hope, chosen one, superweapon - apart from obi-wan, the only guy in a hundred mile radius who had heard it all before from his weird masterās weird prophetic ramblings and didnāt give a shit about any of thatā¦ā¦.. and just loved anakin for the snot-nosed little brat he was
#anakin got so lucky with that 1#thinking about how obi-wan always figured he was just choice 2 after the guy who was Supposed to train anakin died#but actually they were sooooooo fated because HE was the one person who was innately so pissed off with all the prophecy shit#that he just saw the kid. he just saw anakin and grew to love him for what he was#if it had been palpatine vs anyone else on coruscant anakin would have fallen 2weeks into his jedi training#anakin#obiwan
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He's so babygirl,
Cuz this type of scenes happen to high school girls in anime and he's out here owning it.
#gosh dave is so fucking lucky#ungrateful ass i wouldn't let him go back to japan#hes so fucking cute too??#he just smiles shyly after that scene?????#id jump him on spot#my hero academia#boku no hero academia#toshinori yagi#all might
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