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megalony · 5 months ago

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No One But You

Here is another new Emperor Geta imagine, requested by the lovely @emberdreams I hope you like how it turned out.

Please let me know what you all think and keep the Geta requests coming I am on a roll with writing him at the moment.

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Summary: On the night of their wedding, (Y/n) opens up to Geta about some of her insecurities. He quashes every one and makes sure she knows how glad he is that she's his wife now.

Enjoy.

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Apprehension bubbled away inside (Y/n) the further they walked down the corridor. She could feel her palms beginning to sweat while she tried to tangle her fingers together in front of her to rid herself of the energy coursing through her veins.

This is what she had been imagining and dreaming of for the last month.

All the preparations, all the panic and the fuss and the organisation, it had all led up to today, but every daydream and every panicked thought (Y/n) had was about tonight, not earlier today.

Her wedding day.

(Y/n) couldn't believe how lucky she was. Not only had she found herself falling for one of the Emperors when she had visited the palace with her father, who happened to be a Senator. But she now found herself married to said Emperor. The highest authority in Rome. The most desired man in Rome, the man who could end a life with the tilt of his thumb. And now (Y/n) was married to him.

Another shiver tore down (Y/n)'s spine when she felt a warm hand pressing into her lower back. She could feel Geta standing so close to her side that his elbow was brushing her side and his fingers were gliding up and down her lower back between her hips. The smooth action caused his fingers to ruffle a few creases in her pale golden dress.

Cream was always a fashionable colour, but when (Y/n) had been told that she could choose what colour she wanted her wedding dress to be, she knew there was only one colour she could choose.

Golden.

Her new husband's favourite colour. The colour of his luscious hair, the colour he seemed to wear somewhere on his person without fail, every day. The colour that lit up Geta and made everyone think of the sun whenever they saw him. The sun, their source of light and life which related to both Emperors in so many ways.

"Here we are." The low, hushed tone of Geta's voice against the shell of her ear almost made (Y/n) swoon.

She looked up over her shoulder to see a slight smirk dancing across his face, but his expression was genuine, happy even. His make up had been applied heavily for the occasion today and it did not disappoint. His eyes were shrouded in darkness like black coals surrounding two pale brown eyes that looked the colour of mulled wine. And (Y/n) had never seen his lips look so blood red before. He truly was beautiful.

Despite the course of the day, the make up hadn't faded and neither had Geta's mood or energy. If anything, he seemed to have gained more life as the day went on.

Whereas (Y/n) felt like she had become more and more anxious with each passing moment.

She wanted to be a good wife, she didn't want to disappoint her husband.

(Y/n) tried to take note of where they were in the palace but she had long since lost her sense of direction and her bearings. She would need Geta to show her around tomorrow so she could be able to roam the halls without getting herself lost.

After all, this was her new home. Her new room, she had to find her way to and from this corridor.

Her head bowed down and her hands continued to fiddle in front of her while she let Geta step in front of her rather than standing behind her, silently directing her through the halls of the palace.

The festivities had ended, but the distant sound of footsteps and chatter could vaguely be heard. The music had ended, the guests were either retiring to their rooms or making their way back home and the servants were tidying up the banquet hall and clearing the last of the dishes and the drunken fellows from the room.

(Y/n) took the time to look around once Geta opened the chamber door and led her inside. It was both what she had expected and somewhat different to her imaginings.

The adjoining room which she figured served as Geta's private study was spacious. Two desks, a balcony, a purple and red rug lined the floor. Plants in the corners, long white veil drapes hung beside the windows behind a large sofa. The only thing (Y/n) couldn't find were any books anywhere. There were some papers on the desk, but they looked like official state business.

She allowed a smile to flutter across her lips when Geta reached out for her hand and beckoned her to follow him. He led her through into the adjoining room. The bedroom.

(Y/n) curled her free hand around Geta's bare arm and leaned into his side as she looked around the bedroom that was twice the size of her room from when she lived at home. She almost didn't notice the maid stood timidly in the corner until Geta turned towards her.

It was clear she had turned down the bed and set some fresh wine on the table.

"You may go." Geta ticked his wrist to the side to give the maid a signal to leave.

There was a slight look of bewilderment in her eyes but she was quick to nod, curtsey and scurry from the room. It was unusual for the Emperor to be so passive and mellow. All the servants were used to being dismissed by Geta raging at them. Sometimes all that was needed was one angered look from him and the maids went running. Other times he would shout at them to move, to leave him be and get out of the way.

Once, after a very bad argument with his brother when Caracalla had been in one of his moods, Geta had thrown a glass at one of the maids when he shouted at her to leave. He regretted it afterwards, and made sure that maid worked in the kitchens from now on so he didn't have to bump into her again.

Once the maid left and the doors were safely closed, Geta turned his head to look down at (Y/n). There was a hopeful look in his eyes as he stared down at her.

"Do you like it?" He was suddenly very anxious and he wasn't sure how he would respond if she said no. He wanted her to like the room, this was going to be her room, her home, from now on.

"It's lovely." (Y/n) leaned her cheek against Geta's arm while she looked around.

She could quite happily live in this room alone. The bed was bigger than any she had ever seen or slept in before. There was a lounge sofa at the foot of the bed and she knew that once the sun rose in the morning, this room would be flooded with light.

There were even flowers in a vase on the far table along with a pitcher of wine. All that was missing was a few books and maybe an ornament or two so it was truly homely.

(Y/n) was surprised by Geta's sudden affection when he leaned down and kissed her temple with his lips still curved into a bright smile.

She felt him murmur "Good," against her temple before he pulled back and her eyes followed him as he moved to the vanity in the far corner of the room. He began shedding the rings and cuffs from his hands and wrists and the golden leaf crown that was nestled so suitably into his hair.

Her eyes found themselves locked on him, surprised and intrigued as she watched him begin to remove each article of jewellery so slowly and carefully. And she noticed that each one had its own place on the vanity. Maybe that was just how Geta liked things, or perhaps it was a strategy to make sure no one tried to pilfer any of his jewels. (Y/n) would have to find out, she had to learn these things, these quirks and habits of her husband.

She continued to gaze across at him while she slowly stepped into the room and decided to perch down on the end of the bed.

The mattress was soft, it felt like sinking into a cloud and (Y/n) laid her hands down on her lap as she continued to watch Geta with growing anticipation and nerves.

All the wine was going to her head.

That thought made a small smile curve at (Y/n)'s lips as she quietly shook her head to herself. It wasn't as if she had drank enough to sink a ship. She had barely had three glasses of spiced wine all night, but that was enough to mingle in with the adrenaline surging through her system making her feel lightheaded.

She didn't want to be so nervous, she didn't want to feel so childish and silly, but she couldn't help it.

This was it. Tonight was going to change things. They would truly be husband and wife after tonight. Her mother had said this would make her a 'true woman' after sleeping with her husband. This was the start of her new life, and (Y/n) wanted so badly to please Geta. It was pressing on her mind so much that she was starting to panic again.

(Y/n)'s eyes followed Geta's movements as he stripped the red and golden robes from his shoulders and the belt from his waist. She hadn't seemed to notice that he had figured out she was watching him until their eyes met. Something mischevious glinted in those dark eyes and she could see his teeth beginning to nibble down on his lower lip while he watched her.

The way he stalked towards her made (Y/n) wonder if this was how the animals felt when the hunting parties went out. If those animals knew they were ensnared in a trap, about to be caught and claimed.

She moved her hands to grip the edge of the bed, steadying herself while she watched Geta walk slowly towards her. Her head angled back and her eyes followed him as he stood close enough that their knees were now touching and he stooped forward so he was leaning over her. His hand gently brushed beneath her chin and he tilted her head back a little more so their gazes were interlocked.

(Y/n) wasn't sure she could scramble one coherent thought together as she looked up at him. And when his other hand glided along her chin and round to the back of her neck, she didn't know what to do.

A small sound tumbled past her lips when she felt Geta's nimble fingers weaving into her neatly pinned hair.

He easily pulled a pin from the back of her hair and watched with a glowering grin as her hair fell from its previous style. Loose tendrils fluttered towards her shoulders and bounced around her cheeks and near her eyes. Geta had the sudden urge to run his fingers through her hair, to knot his fingers in her tendrils and pull and angle her head in his direction.

"Beautiful." He muttered with a grin to rival all others and when (Y/n) tried to bashfully duck her head, she felt his hand press into her chin to prevent her from looking away from him.

She was sure he murmured "Don't hide from me," but his voice was so tender and quiet that she couldn't be sure whether she heard him or simply imagined it. Either way, Geta's lips were suddenly on hers, overriding every other thought she had and turning her brain to mush.

She felt his hands slither down until he was gripping her waist with his thumbs gliding over her hips. (Y/n) felt like she was turning to jelly the longer he kissed her. She was almost going limp in his arms and it allowed Geta to shuffle her further up the bed until she was sat in the middle and he was knelt over her with his knees pressing down on either side of her thighs.

When his wine-stained lips finally let her come up for air, (Y/n) couldn't help but admire the way he sank back on his heels and stayed kneeling over her lap like this. It was a position she had never been in before, but one she was already in love with.

(Y/n) wasn't quite sure what to do with herself when Geta leaned forward and tucked his face into the crook of her neck. She decided on settling her hands on his broad shoulders while she fought back a shiver when his lips attached to the side of her neck. She couldn't help but scratch her nails against his shoulders when his teeth grazed against her skin but it seemed to encourage him further.

She stayed amicably still while Geta leaned further into her and hovered over her, looking like an angel cast in the gentle candlelight.

Her hands moved from his shoulders to daringly cup either side of his neck and her thumbs grazed along the sharp cut of his jaw when Geta lifted his head to kiss her again. It felt like he was stealing all the air from his lungs and (Y/n) would gladly give it all to him if that's what he desired.

She could feel herself going lightheaded while his tongue parted her lips and had her straining to stay sitting upright when he was leaning enough that she was close to falling on her back.

But her eyes opened with intrigue when she felt Geta's hands move. She watched, wide-eyed but somewhat calm and still while he began his administrations of pulling the short golden straps down her arms. The feeling of his fingertips gliding along her skin was soft and ticklish and she held her breath when Geta hooked his finger in the cleavage of her dress so he could further pull it down.

He liked the way her chest started to heave with faster, shallow breaths the more he continued to tug on her dress until he unhooked it from around her hips and discarded it somewhere on the floor. He liked how nervous she seemed and how she was clearly waiting for him to make each movement like she was too afraid to move on her own and do something first.

Although he was pleasantly surprised when (Y/n) seemed to become unstuck and her hands moved of their own accord. He paused with his hands settled on her bare hips and his lips attached to the edge of her mouth, barely touching and parted enough so that Geta could glance his eyes down and watch her slow movements.

He stayed pliant and curious while (Y/n)'s fingertips tickled his waist and she fished around for the hem of his shirt and pulled it up. Geta obliged, parting from her so she could tug the golden material over his head, following his lead by tossing it somewhere on the floor.

It seemed unfair how he had undressed (Y/n) but had stayed still somewhat clothed before her. She wanted to even the scales.

"Okay?"

Geta's question took her by surprise and (Y/n)'s wide eyes lifted to lock with his as she nodded. Lips slightly parted in that docile look that made her look like a Goddess sat before him.

(Y/n) allowed her eyes to drag along Geta's frame, allowing herself to take in his pale milky skin and search for any marks or scars. Anything on he great canvas that was his skin so she could commit each mark to memory. She wanted to be able to know Geta's body like a map of the world, something she could trace and get to know and navigate even with her eyes closed.

Her observations were cut off when Geta leaned forward and pecked her lips, gently at first. Then again and again until he was slowly nudging her down into the bed, devouring her lips like they were the air he needed to breathe. His tongue swiped over her lower lip and his right hand gave her flesh a tight squeeze as he continued to hover above her.

Her hands moved round to cup his face and her thumbs brushed across his freshly shaven face. He tensed up his chest and pushed down, effortlessly pinning her back against the mattress so she stayed beneath him. Right where he wanted her.

She felt like the bed was made of quick sand that was swallowing her whole. The more Geta leaned down into her, the more (Y/n) felt like she was about to disappear, but in the best possible way.

Geta attached his lips to her jaw while one hand slid down her waist to find purchase on her hip. But after a moment or two, he noticed the faraway look in her eyes like she was wandering some place else in her mind.

His lips peppered across her jaw, up the corner of her mouth and after a few soft pecks to her mouth, he hummed "Okay?" against her lips.

(Y/n) tried to nod, but she could see the look in Geta's eyes told her he didn't quite believe her.

Her hands moved to settle on his shoulders again and she lifted her head, chasing after his lips when he pulled back so he could look down on her properly. (Y/n) didn't want him to worry or think that something was wrong when it wasn't. It was simply (Y/n)'s mind running away without her, she couldn't help all her thoughts that were starting to override everything else.

She knew she needed to calm down and relax, that she needed to let every worry run out of her head so she could be in this moment with Geta. After all, this is what she had been worrying, thinking and dreaming about for weeks now.

She tried again to kiss him but Geta angled his head to one side and arched a brow in that mannerism that told her to tell him the truth. They had been married only hours and already he could tell when she wasn't telling him something.

"I'm just… nervous." (Y/n) did her best to hide the embarrassment from her voice and stop from ducking her head down so she wasn't avoiding his gaze. She guessed if she tried to look away he would simply lift her chin so she was looking at him again.

"Of me?" There was an air of concern in Geta's voice, but it didn't fade the smile on his lips.

A flutter of panic bubbled up in (Y/n)'s chest and ignited in her eyes, especially when Geta moved. She thought for a moment that he was about to climb off her and possibly move away, that she might have offended him without realising. But he was simply switching positions.

Instead of kneeling with each knee pressing into her thighs, Geta shifted until (Y/n) parted her thighs and he could kneel between them instead. His abdomen pressed down against hers and he propped up on his elbows so he didn't let his full weight crush down on her. He began to glide his fingertips along her shoulder and across the bare expanse of her chest which caused (Y/n) to shiver beneath him.

"No, no… I just, I want to be good enough for you. I want to be able to take care of you properly."

That was the best way that (Y/n) could word what was circling through her mind.

She was truly afraid she wouldn't be enough. It was a miracle that Geta had even been interested in her in the first place and that he seemed to truly care about her. All her life, (Y/n) had been brought up to know that any marriage she was presented with by her parents would be about advantages and prosperity, not love or someone she truly wanted to be with.

Falling for Geta had been one thing, but him falling for her too and asking her to marry him felt too good to be true. And (Y/n) wanted to be good enough for him. She wanted to be a good wife, she wanted to be enough for Geta in every sense of the word. It was her duty as a wife to please him, especially when it came to sex and having an heir.

But (Y/n) had never done this before and she couldn't help the gnawing worry in the back of her mind that she might not be good enough for Geta. That he would be bored with her or think she wasn't enticing or satisfying enough for him. After all, it was no secret that both Emperors had their fair share of women. They made that clear when they turned up to events and gatherings with their vast gathering of concubines and whores.

"You're worried you won't be enough?" Genuine confusion entwined in Geta's voice as his smile faded into a frown.

He couldn't gather where (Y/n) would get an idea like that. Had he done something to give her that impression? Did he make a remark that made her worry? Had someone else poisoned her ear against him? Why wouldn't she be good enough for him?

(Y/n) felt like ducking her head down to avoid that intensifying gaze, but she resisted the urge. Instead, she focused her gaze on the dark circles beneath his eyes that hadn't been washed off yet. And she rose her hand to glide her fingertips up the side of his neck, tracing each curve and muscle that pressed out against his skin.

"You've been with other lovers, Geta. I haven't." She couldn't look him in the eyes as she spoke, it made her feel so silly and somehow ashamed.

It wasn't the same for him as it was for her.

It was encouraged for men to be with women before marriage, but if a woman slept with a man before she was married then she was shamed. She was outcast. She was no longer virtuous. And (Y/n) was the daughter of a Senate, her virtue was something she was brought up to hold dear.

Clearly Geta had slept with other women, it was natural and he made no secret of it. But that meant he had more experience with sexual partners whereas (Y/n) didn't. She didn't want to do something wrong or somehow be boring for him and make him prefer the company of his concubines rather than her.

Her eyes widened and finally looked back up to his when Geta reached his hand up from tracing her chest to curl lightly around her wrist that was resting beside his face. He leaned into her touch and turned his head to press a delicate kiss against the inside of her wrist over her throbbing pulse.

"That doesn't mean a thing, dear wife. There might have been others before you, but there won't be anyone else but you now. You're the only one I want; it's you I was determined to marry."

Geta thought his words would have made her smile, but he hated how (Y/n) turned her head to the side so her cheek was pressed into the cushion and she was no longer looking up at him. The action caused a frown to pull deeper at his pale features and he leaned his weight on her a little more so he could reach up and turn her head back in his direction.

He wanted her to believe him because he was telling the truth, he wasn't lying to calm her or give her a false sense of security. She was the girl who caught his eye, she was the one who stole his heart from the very moment he saw her and she was the one who Geta made sure he married.

He spoke to her parents about an engagement as soon as he could, he made sure he didn't have to wait long to marry her because she was the one his heart wanted. He thought she would have figured that out by now.

"You don't believe me?" There was something almost frightful and powerful in his voice which made (Y/n)'s breathing hitch and her chest pushed up against his as she took a deep breath.

She wasn't trying to aggravate him or upset him, she was simply speaking her mind because he had asked.

"My mother prepared me; I know of the concubines and that my place will always be above them-"

(Y/n) had been well prepared.

After the initial shock and her parents brief floundering, her mother had sat her down to talk. She went through everything with (Y/n) from how prestigious this marriage was for their family to what it would mean for (Y/n) to become an Empress.

One of the things that came up was the subject of concubines. (Y/n) knew Geta and Caracalla had a handful of women like that. But she had been told that a wife always came first. A wife was higher than a concubine in the ladder of class and states.

Concubines were mistresses, some of them were treated like wives, they were there for whatever the Emperors wanted whether it was sex, company or someone to talk to. But once (Y/n) married Geta, she would become higher than those women.

Her mother told her that she couldn't expect the Emperor to give up his women. He had a right to have them around the palace if he wished, he would likely get bored and go to them in dark nights when he seeked pleasure. That was something (Y/n) had been told was normal. And when- her mother always said when, not if- (Y/n) became pregnant, there would be a point where Geta would have to abstain from her. It was to make sure the pregnancy wasn't compromised.

During that time, Geta would need someone to go to, someone to be with when he couldn't be with (Y/n).

It hurt, but she had no right to challenge it. She was just hoping that she would be enough for Geta and that he wouldn't go to those women unless (Y/n) was pregnant and couldn't be with him any longer. She didn't want to think of him wandering to those concubines instead of her. Choosing them over her.

"I told you, there is no one but you."

The look of confusion in her eyes seemed to make Geta smile which confused (Y/n) even more.

"I dismissed them after our engagement. The only women of that kind are the ones Caracalla keeps company with. If I must tell you every day that you're the only woman I want, then so be it."

(Y/n) couldn't quite bring herself to comprehend those words. Had he truly dismissed his concubines? Had he done that for her?

He didn't have to, he was the Emperor, he had every right to have those women around him if he so wished. No one could tell him otherwise or question him and none of the men on his council would bat an eyelid about him having those women around or him seeking their company.

After all, Caracalla took a lot of his women everywhere with him and Geta had taken a few to gatherings and parties when he wanted their company. It wasn't something any of them were ashamed of.

She could feel tears welling up in her eyes as his words finally seemed to sink in. Geta wanted her and clearly loved her enough to give himself to her and her alone. He was doing the same as she was. Giving themselves to each other, devoting to only one another. Even during the point in the future where they would have to abstain if (Y/n) got pregnant, Geta was going to devote himself to her and not go with another woman.

Every worry she previously had about tonight and their future had diminished in a matter of minutes.

She took Geta by surprise when she pushed up against his chest and cupped his face in her palms so she could reel him down into a searing kiss. The touch was so surprising that their teeth clashed together and (Y/n) felt Geta groaning against her lips as he slammed his palm down into the mattress before he fell down onto her and crushed her beneath him.

The touch was much appreciated as Geta's other hand squeezed her hip until his fingertips were leaving imprints and bruises in his wake and it felt like they were about to burst through her flesh and press against the bone. But (Y/n) didn't mind. If anything, she welcomed the touch.

She kissed him until the breathlessness made her head spin and she had to drop her head back down onto the pillow, tugging Geta with her until he was practically lying fully on top of her.

The smile that blessed his face was one that made (Y/n)'s stomach flip and she shuddered beneath him, tracing her thumb along the edge of his mouth.

"I'm rather touched you're so concerned with taking care of me, dear wife. That isn't something that happens too often."

There was a whimsical look in Geta's eyes as he spoke and thought about her concern. He was inwardly thrilled that (Y/n) clearly wanted to please him just as much as he wanted to please her and make her happy and take care of her. It wasn't usually like this. It was typically Geta taking care of others; dealing with Rome and her problems and victories. And he was the one who cared for Caracalla.

He watched over his twin, he calmed him when he was enraged and in his awful moods. He soothed him when he was panicked or frightened or when he was drained and didn't feel he could move at all. And when Caracalla was hyper Geta tried to steer him and guide him. He did all he could to protect his brother and it would be the same with (Y/n) too, he would protect and love her with his life.

But it made such a lovely change to have someone else caring for Geta, for a change.

"Now," His words hushed against her lips as a devilish grin spread across his features and he dove down to steal a kiss. "Let me take care of you."

***

The streaks of sunlight that blistered through the drapes cast a hazy orange glow around the room. It seemed to light up every corner and illuminate the room as if (Y/n) had woken up and found herself trapped in a painting with all its brightness and shimmering golden hues.

It took a few moments for her eyes to adjust and for her mind to catch up and work out where she was, for this wasn't her room.

Or rather, it was, but it was new. It was what had now become her room, like something out of a fantasy.

A grin spread across her lips at the mere thought and she tiredly lifted her head from the pillow to look around. She couldn't guess what time it was and she wasn't sure what time Geta usually rose, but she figured it would be early. Not today, though. Not for the next three days, in fact, as Geta had made sure there were no plans or meetings that would tear him away from his wife.

Twisting from her side onto her back, (Y/n) looked across at Geta. He was still sleeping.

He looked peaceful when he slept, like every worry had been washed away and he could finally relax. There were no tense muscles, no tightened jaw or clenched fists or angered shouts when no one listened to him or heeded his words and advice. He looked serene.

(Y/n) couldn't help herself. She had to turn to lay on her front and slowly inch closer to him. She knew he wouldn't mind.

Her chin gingerly settled on his shoulder and she delicately looped her arm over his exposed torso so she was nestled up into his side with her chest pressing on his side.

The room felt oddly warm, considering the windows were partially opened and the sheets were tangled near the bottom of the bed. Only one sheet remained over their entwined bodies and it was wrangled around their legs and draped very low over Geta's abdomen and across (Y/n)'s mid section. She was half covered, but it wasn't as if there was any indecency when no one would be walking in to interrupt them anytime soon.

She began tracing the pad of her finger across his pale skin, noticing the few tiny scars he had near his collar bone and the odd ones that littered his chest. He'd either run in with a few accidents as a child or had been on the wrong end of a sword during training. Perhaps it had been his father; (Y/n) knew his father had been less than kind to the twins when they were growing up. And to shield Caracalla, Geta had taken most of the torment they suffered.

She would make it her mission to note down every mole, every scar and freckle that painted his porcelain skin.

Her fingers continued to dance their path along his skin while she tilted her head down and pressed a few fluttering, soft kisses along his shoulder and up the side of his neck.

She thought he was still asleep until she realised his lips had quirked into a grin, despite his eyes remaining closed and the rest of his body staying frozen to trick her. So he could lay quietly and see what she was up to.

"Morning," (Y/n) murmured softly between hollow kisses along the side of his neck that made Geta visibly shiver and he finally broke out of his frozen state.

He slid his arm beneath her waist, hooked his hand over her hip and reeled her in closer while he flopped his head to the side and peeked his eyes open. His nose scrunched up when he smiled and he tiredly reached his other hand across until his fingers could run through her hair.

He had removed all the pins and flowers from her hair last night and now each strand was knotted and tangled up in a beautiful mess. Geta was sure his own hair didn't look much better, it would likely be stuck up in every direction by now after they had stayed up well into the early morning.

His fingers tangled in her hair and he slowly brushed a few loose tendrils behind her ear whilst gliding his knuckles along her soft cheek. His hand curved around to duck beneath her chin and he angled her head down so he didn't have to move as far to kiss her.

He was sure her kisses amounted to the same intoxication as opium. Too many kisses would make him drunk; and that was exactly the state Geta wanted to feel for the rest of his life.

"What are you thinking?" (Y/n) wasn't sure he heard her with how quiet her voice came out, but the hazy look in his eyes and the smile that pulled on his lips showed that he had.

"That I could get used to a view like this every morning."

His smile could rival even the most beautiful of sunsets and he finally pushed up so he could capture her lips with his for a deeper kiss that allowed him to snatch every ounce of air from her lungs.

This was how Geta wanted to wake up every morning from here on out, and this was exactly the future that was install for them both.

#imagine #emperor geta imagine #emperor geta x reader #geta imagine #geta x reader #gladiator imagine #gladiator 2 #gladiator ii #gladiator movie #emperor caracalla #joseph quinn x reader #joseph quinn imagine #joseph quinn

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bonesvoid · 5 months ago

Text

THE BIRTH OF THE CELESTIAL REALM — A VIKTOR X PLUS-SIZED!READER SMUT FIC

word count: 5k

contains the following: nsfw (duh), unbalanced power dynamics (viktor’s technically your superior, even though you’re jayce’s personal assistant), one-off mention of breast milk (relating to the painting viktor sees in the art museum), some brief fatphobia, praise, mild degradation (the use of the word ‘slut’), wardrobe malfunction, viktor pops a boner, somewhat public sex (you and viktor are in a bathroom), primal!viktor go brrrr (horny takes over and he fucks the shit out of you), make out session, clothes get ripped off, titty sucking, dom!viktor, sub!reader, reader is fem but you can ignore the pronouns if need be, blowjob, deepthroating, facefucking, facesitting, pussy eating champ!viktor, czech terms of endearment, viktor got that casanova in him, minor breath play?, too many uses of pussy/cunt/dick/cunt but you’ll never catch author using ‘manhood’ or ‘puss’ as replacements, doggy style, unprotected sex, breeding kink, creampie, and a surprise post-credit scene at the end ;3

summary: viktor was never a fan of art. however, he decides to give it a shot after failing to solve a series of seemingly impossible equations by visiting the grand museum of art in piltover… only for a glimpse of a particular painting among the piltovian renaissance art pieces to leave him frazzled and confusingly aroused. it doesn’t help that you, jayce’s personal assistant and newest member to the hextech team, are a perfect match to the beauty depicted.

a/n: strap the fuck it, lads laddies and lassos… we’re taking a trip to viktor pound town (please reblog or comment if you can, this is my magus opus)

The Grand Museum of Art, one of Piltover’s premiere museums, was stationed directly outside Jayce Talis and Viktor’s laboratory. One would think that Viktor had no interest in art, too engrossed in making scientific discoveries to entertain such often trivial subjects. Yet, unbeknownst to many, Viktor frequented that museum on days his mind was muddled with unsolvable equations and failed prototypes launches. What better remedy was there for stuck-in-the-mud science than immersing oneself in the wonders of art?

However, the first time the inventor visited the museum, he worried that he made a mistake. Modern paintings and sculptures littered the front half of the museum; in Viktor’s eyes, they were sorry excuses for art. What was so thought provoking about a banana taped to the ceiling?

“Not a fan of the modern pieces?” a nearby museum employee asked Viktor. The Zaunite tore his gaze from a painting on various black and blue rectangles to answer the employee, “I, eh.. I’m afraid that I’m not.”

“We have a lot better pieces towards the back of the museum,” the employee gestured towards the hallway behind them, “I recommend the section on the Piltovian Renaissance, let me show you,” with a silent nod, Viktor followed the employee towards the recommended section, the end tip of his crutch thumping softly against the museum’s marble floors.

Viktor scanned the various art pieces they passed by. Some were interesting with their use of medium or color while others left a sour impression with their lack of depth. It wasn’t long until they reached the far back portion of the museum, a golden plaque highlighting the words ‘Piltovian Renaissance’ in delicate script by the entrance to the next section. The employee gave Viktor a smile, “I hope you enjoy!” and skittered off to help another patron.

“Piltovian Renassiance,” the inventor mumbled while he adjusted his hold on his crutch. He vaguely encountered the term during his early academy days when he had to take a mandatory art class. Viktor didn’t remember much about it, other than how monotonous and uninterested the professor of that class was, “Let’s see what you have to offer.”

The section reflected the earlier days of the museum, the flooring and walls relics of the past with their aged appearances. A few other patrons perused about the floor, as Viktor strolled up to the first painting by the section’s entrance. The painting was broken into three vertical columns with the largest column showcasing a variety of green and blue hues, people and animals alike scattered about what Viktor could only assume to be Runeterra. His eyes darted to the column left of the largest, much more vibrant and simplistic in its design with only a few people and animals present. He then turned his attention to the rightmost column, the greens and blues replaced by dark colors and the imagery was nothing but suffering and damnation upon its subjects.

“A fan of Bosch, aren’t you?” the jubilant voice of an older woman greeted Viktor. A woman with greying hair and designer clothes waltzed up next to him, a small unfortunate-looking dog shaking in her open purse, “An excellent choice to admire, indeed! What might your view on it be, young man?”

“Eh,” the Zaunite was by no means an art critic nor did he consider himself to be an art enjoyer yet, “It’s, uhm… very vibrant,” he eyed the painting once more, “I like the use of symmetry.”

Despite his lackluster response, the female patron was delighted to hear his views, “As do I! I must say that Hieronymus Bosch’s The Garden of Runeterran Delights is one of his more prudish yet thought-provoking pieces. Many critics believe this piece to be a depiction of our choices in the afterlife, one vibrant and peaceful and the other dark and violent,” she let out a boisterous laugh and her poor dog yelped in response, “Reminds you of the division between Piltover and the Undercity, does it not?”

Viktor bit his bottom lip, “I suppose so,” That’s enough, go away now, you unsightly- “It’s an interesting piece,” Don’t rip her head off with your crutch.

“Indeed!” the woman chirped, “Well, you enjoy your time here, dear. Have a splendid day,” and walked off to go bother someone else. Viktor prayed to Janna for the freedom of that dog trapped in their owners�� clutches.

Viktor tried his best to keep an open but not science heavy mind towards the art, as he shuffled to and from various paintings and sculptures. The works presented in the Piltovian Renaissance collection were much more appealing to the eye than the sorry excuses for art the modern collection had to offer. After examining a sculpture of a Yordle—the inventor swore that the Yordle depicted looked identical to Professor Hemingdinger—shaking hands with a taller person, Viktor searched for a bench and sat down on the closest one, resting his weary body upon it. He laid his crutch next to him and rubbed his eyes, exhaustion evident with his under bags heavier than yesterday. The patrons in front of the bench dissipated a moment or two after Viktor took his seat and showcased a new art piece he hadn’t yet seen.

A painting, just like the many previous ones Viktor saw that day. Its background showcased a night sky full of gorgeous constellations and fluffy clouds. A pondering man sat behind a golden chariot carted by a pair of geese, his skin tan and the lower half of his body covered by blue fabric. Certainly more detailed than the other paintings, Viktor mused to himself, as he savored each component of the painting. He made contact with the subject of the piece and suddenly choked on his own spit, stifling back his coughs.

The subject of the painting featured a woman—a naked woman—adoring a long white veil and golden jewelry. Only her pussy—no, pussy was too crude for this masterpiece—her womanhood and one of her legs were covered by flowing red fabric. Viktor’s gaze locked in an oddity she saw around the woman’s breasts, her hand squeezing one and shooting— Oh my Gods, is THAT breast milk?

Sure enough, it was indeed breast milk, a stream of it being squeezed out from the woman’s breast. The chubby baby who sat upon her clothed thigh reached its hand out to the woman’s breast. His face growing redder by the minute, Viktor quickly glanced at the plaque behind the painting, The Birth of the Celestial Realm by Peter Paul Rubens, and made a swift retreat from the Piltovian Renaissance section of the museum.

Viktor’s mind was filled with nothing but scandalous thoughts, as he walked back to the lab. With each attempt to get back on track with a new equation or problem to solve, it always ended in Viktor visualizing the woman in that painting. By the time he returned to the lab, pink had overtaken the inventor’s usual pale face, enough so that—when Viktor returned to his workstation next to Jayce—his partner commented on it, “Hey Viktor, why are you so pink?”

“It’s cold outside.”

“It’s April.”

“I’m operating under worse bodily conditions than you, so zip it.”

“Okay, okay!”

Viktor let out a low ‘tsk’ and zoned back in on his work, as he examined the leftover blueprints for the next phase of Hextech works. A nose hair trimmer? Is Jayce— “Mr. Talis!” a voice akin to honeysuckles and lavender caught Viktor’s attention. Besides Jayce’s workstation, you, Jayce’s personal assistant, approached with a dossier in one hand and a steaming cup of coffee in the other.

Since Viktor and Jayce had engineered so many improvements and inventions for Piltover, the Council rewarded them with a budgetary increase and money set aside to hire an additional staff member so each inventor could have a personal assistant. Viktor wasn’t confident that the new assistant could get his schedule and needs as right as Sky did, so Jayce offered to take on whoever was hired.

You were a recent graduate from the Academy, five or so years junior to the likes of Viktor and Jayce, and hailed from one of the less-known Houses in Piltover, responsible for overseeing Piltover’s fishing sector. Your name would come up a few times in conversation whenever Jayce forced Viktor to attend a gala or ��charity event” held by the Council. You were praised for your intellect, strive for justice, and respect, but more off than not, the members of the upper Piltovian crust were more than willing to speak ill of your name.

Such a plump girl, don’t you think? I fear that she may never find a husband.

Oh, yes, I’m afraid that I must agree. Perhaps, we can convince her mother to lighten up on her portions.

Did you hear that she has to get her dressed altered by a beauty parlor in the Undercity?!

What, really? What a scandal!

Eventually, he would see the owner of that name—you, better dressed than the gossiping women who thought feathers were in fashion—come around and the nobles would plaster on fake smiles and hearty laughs until you moved to a different part of the ballroom.

The Piltovian Houses’ obsession with your appearance was maddening. Upon the few times he interacted with you prior to your arrival as Jayce’s assistant, he could see your strength, your determination, and your passion. The way you spoke about the Undercity was always respectful, correctly referring to it as Zaun and mentioning on occasion how you were convincing your father to partner with Zaun’s fishing businesses to advance equality and equity between the two cities. Compared to the snobbish Piltovians, Zaunites valued fatness; being fat meant you had food, it meant you were strong enough to stand your ground.

Although Viktor wasn’t too key on physical attitudes dominating how relationships were structured, he wasn’t afraid to admit that you were pretty. Your personality and your ambitions accentuated your beauty, but Viktor also found your face to be just as gorgeous. The way you smiled, the spark in your eyes, how your cheeks resembled fresh apples, highlighted the overall appeal of your face. Yet, given the wedge between you two’s stations and the professional boundaries in place, Viktor didn’t think of you more than a kind and pretty coworker of his, someone who would get coffee with or chat about subjects of fancy like physics. Nothing more, nothing less, he was your superior and that was it.

Unfortunately, all of that was thrown out the window today.

Viktor mimicked some tinkering on a miscellaneous project, his eyes fixated on whatever interaction was occurring between you and Jayce. You handed your superior the dossier and informed him of the new projects that the Council was interested in. Jayce flipped through the papers and shook his head, mumbling something about the stupidity of Councilor Salo’s suggestions.

“I also got your coffee, courtesy of Madam Lincove at the café!” you held out the cup of coffee for Jayce to take, “Thank you,” he reached for the cup, fingers barely grazing it, when it suddenly slipped from both of your hands, “Shit!” Jayce successfully caught the cup of coffee before it hit the floor, but not at the expense of casualties.

The sound of a splash, followed by a yelp of pain, echoed throughout the lab. Instead of the floor, most of the coffee landed on your red blouse, darkening the fabric in its wake. Viktor jumped to his feet, which was a bad idea because he nearly fell, when you ran out of the lab and dashed through the hallway. Without a word to Jayce, the inventor left the lab and onto the path you took.

Viktor heard a series of curses coming from the bathroom. There you are. He knocked on the door and called out to you, “Is everything alright?”

“Yes!” you yelled back, “Everything is- oh, fuck!” Without a second thought, Viktor twisted the door knob, you forgot to lock it, and the door swung open, “Are you okay?!” he shouted, his expression frazzled.

You stood frozen in front of the bathroom mirror, a bundle of paper towels in your hands. Lowering your hands, the problem was revealed.

The top buttons of your blouse popped off, exposing your bra and cleavage. A simple black bra held your breasts together. Viktor couldn’t help but stare, eyes as big as saucers, “Oh. I, eh-” he stammered, unable to break his gaze. Instinctively, you dropped the paper towels and covered your chest, “Pl- Please don’t stare!”

“I’m so sorry,” the inventor apologized. A million thoughts raced around his mine, as Viktor attempted to regain his composure. You turned your back to him and mumbled something about needing a sewing kit. Viktor’s attention landed on your ass, the curve and plumpness highlighted by your pencil skirt. His pulse quickened and his palms began to sweat. What am I, a teenage boy seeing a girl for the first time?! Viktor scolded himself.

“Viktor,” you faced the Zaunite once more, hands still concealing your large chest, “Viktor, why do you-” you swallowed a good amount of spit, your eyes fixated on Viktor’s… lower half? “Viktor, why do you have a hard on?”

“What?” Viktor peered down at his trousers. Sure enough, he pitched a tent, his boner on full display. Like you with your chest, he covered his hands to hide his erection, “Oh my Gods, I’m so fucking sorry,” How unprofessional, how lewd, how inappropriate, how—

The Birth of the Celestial Realm appeared in Viktor’s head at the worst possible moment. He thought of the woman in the painting; he thought of how mesmerizing her fat rolls and thighs, how full and large her breasts were, how she posed in such a delightful manner. Viktor stifled back a moan and his cheeks reddened, as his cock strained against his suddenly suffocating trousers.

“Viktor,” the way his name rolled off your tongue sent shivers down his artificial spine, “Why are you looking at me like that?” you inquired, your eyes resembling that of an innocent doe.

“Like- Like what?” Viktor asked, walking over to the sink and using it as a shield for his obvious arousal. You frowned, “Like you wanna devour me whole.”

Something primal clicked in Viktor’s mind at your comment. Slowly, he stepped to the side of the sink and walked towards you, setting his crutch against the bathroom wall. You tilted your head, “Viktor? Whatcha doing?” Gods, you were pure as snow.

Viktor suddenly gripped your sides and squeezed hard, a yelp of shock escaping your red painted lips, “Viktor!” you exclaimed, “What has gotten into you?!”

“I’m sorry,” he apologized again, his accent thick. You clenched your thighs together at the sound. Viktor’s accent never failed to make your heart skip a beat. In all honesty, you had a bit of a crush on the Zaunite. You admired his work ethic, determination, and resilience, as well as his sharp facial features and hands. Yet, he was your superior, it would be wrong to engage in such a—

Viktor smashed his lips against yours, nearly knocking his crooked teeth into your mouth. You moaned at how deep and lustful his kissing was, as you wrapped your arms around Viktor’s waist as a means to secure him. While the two of you kissed like horny teens ready for their first time, you stepped backwards and backwards until your back was pressed up against the wall.

For a moment, Viktor broke the kiss, “I can’t help myself,” he confessed. His hands moved from your chubby sides to your breasts. With astonishing strength, Viktor tore your blouse open, the remaining buttons flying off and hitting the floor. You gasped, “Oh my Gods,” you never knew that Viktor had such upper body strength.

Viktor pulled you off the wall and, in one swift motion, unhooked your bra. He tossed it on the floor and groped at your chest, his hands a bit too small to fully cover them. Viktor groaned, as he marveled at your chest, almost salivating at the sight. The Birth of the Celestial Realm flashed through his mind again and Viktor pressed his forehead against yours, “I need you,” he whispered, “I need you.”

“Viktor…” you whispered back, your breath tickling the Zaunite’s ear, “Make me yours.”

The honey amber in Viktor’s eyes darkened at your command. Grabbing his crutch, he dragged you off to the unoccupied bathroom and slammed the door shut. Viktor plopped his ass down on the toilet as a makeshift chair and gripped your breasts, “I’ll make you mine,” he jerked one breast towards his face and latched onto the nipple, sucking hard and without shame. You whimpered and moved closer, both breasts squashed against Viktor’s face, “Oh, sweet boy, you’re sucking me so good!” you cried out. Viktor’s mouth vibrated against your sensitive nipple in response, earning another moan from you.

Gods, your skin is so supple and tender, Viktor thought to himself, as his hand reached towards your other breast and clenched it. You panted and moaned shamelessly, as Viktor assaulted your chest with playful grasps and hickeys galore. Your mind was hazy with arousal and desperation. This was a true come dream, something you never pictured happening. The two of you crossed a line that you could never backtrack from.

“Viktor…!” you whined, pushing him off your breasts, “I want you, I wanna please you,” you got on your knees, your thick thighs pressed together, “Please, please let me pleasure you, please.”

“How can I say no to such an angel?” the scientist purred. He hopped off the toilet seat and laid down on the bathroom tiles, he would need to sanitize his clothes at a later time, “Suck my cock, slut,” Oh, that was bold.

You wasted no time in unbuttoning Viktor’s trousers and pulling down his boxers. Staring at Viktor’s pretty cock, you admired its appearance. Pale, slightly vein, a bit thick, and definitely long. Guess it’s true that the tall skinny guys have massive cocks. Your mouth watered at the sight and you leaned forward to give the mushroom tip a gentle kiss.

Viktor moaned under his breath and his dick twitched in satisfaction. You giggled, “You’re so cute,” before lowering your mouth onto his cock. Viktor grunted loudly, panting hard as you took more and more inches in your mouth. You looked divine, you looked ethereal, as you sucked him off. Spit spilled down your lips while your head bobbed with the motions of the blowjobs. You swore you went cross-eyed from the sensation of Viktor’s sweet dick in your mouth. The scent of his cologne, an intoxicating mix of vanilla and bourbon, was enough to water down your mind with pure filth.

While you continued to slurp and drink up the inventor’s essence, you adjusted your position and hitched your ass up, spreading your legs open. One of your hands teased your clothed cunt, rubbing your fingers against your panties. In your new position, you were able to take more of Viktor in your mouth, the tip of his cock hitting the back of your throat.

You felt a pair of bony hands grip at your hair before you were pulled off Viktor’s cock, “Oh, are we-” you tried to ask if he needed a break, only to have your lips slammed back down on his dick. Viktor fucked your face without remorse, a crescendo of moans and groans filling the bathroom while you fought the instinct to gag. Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck me, fuck me, fuck me! your mind chanted like a prayer.

Viktor let out one last grunt and climaxed, shooting a thick rope of cum down your throat. Once finished, he pulled you off his cock and you coughed, some cum leaking out of your mouth. Momma didn’t raise no spitter, you happily took whatever cum the inventor had to offer. Viktor’s hands cupped your face, thumbs caressing your apple-y cheeks, “Oh, kokoušek, you did amazing.”

“Thanks!” your voice was raspy, your throat properly fucked, “Anything for you, Viktor,” the Zaunite graced you with a smile and your body shivered with excitement. He has a great smile. “Lay down,” he instructed you. Like the obedient bitch you were, you did as commanded, switching positions with Viktor and resting your back on the floor, “It’s time that I return the favor,” he mewled, lifting up your skirt and hooking his fingers around the waistband of your tights. Viktor tugged down and removed your tights, taking a moment to admire your strong thighs and the stretch marks he could on your lower stomach, “Simply divine,” he cooed before taking off your skirt, leaving you almost completely naked, minus your lacy cherry panties.

“Oh!” you reached your hands down in an effort to cover yourself up, a force of habit, only to have your hands pinned to the floor, Viktor’s body hovering above you, “No.”

The power from the simple ‘no’ went straight to your cunt, staining your panties with wetness, “Don’t hide from me,” he purred, hot breath tickling your face, “You’re sexy,” he kissed your forehead.

“You’re talented,” he kissed your nose.

“You’re beautiful,” a kiss on your cheek.

“You’re intelligent,” a kiss on the other cheek.

“You’re brilliant,” a kiss to your lips, the longest out of all the kisses, as he lingered. You ran your fingers through his dark waves, combing any knots out and twirling a few strands. Viktor let out a laugh, vibrating against your lips, and pulled himself away, “You’re radiant,” he murmured, “A work of art.”

“As are you,” you gave the scientist a peck on the nose, “Like one of those sculptures from the Piltovian Renaissance.”

Viktor nearly choked on his own saliva, much to your concern, “Are you okay?” you asked with a frown. He nodded, “Yes, yes. It was just surprising to hear so, given that I visited that section in the Grand Museum of Art earlier today.”

“Oh, what a coincidence,” you offered Viktor an innocent, oblivious smile. Gods, you were going to be the death of him, but Viktor much preferred to die at your hands than at his illness, “Oh, drahoušku, indulge me for a moment,” to which you replied, “Anything for you.”

“Sit on my face.”

“I beg your pardon?”

“Sit on my face, so I can eat you out.”

“Won’t I suffocate you if I do?”

“Out of all the ways I could die, I rather go out while devouring your warm, wet cunt.”

You blinked rapidly, his words somewhat crude but made your pussy flutter, “Okay then,” you sat back up and Viktor laid back down, planting your thighs between his face like ear muffs, “Are you sure-” you had no time to ask for confirmation when Viktor roughly slammed your cunt against his whole face, hooked nose bumping into your swollen clit while he lapped at your juices like a starved man. You tried so desperately to hold back your moans and cries of pleasure, but succumbed to the frenzy of it all when Viktor dug his nails into your plush thighs as a sign to sing like the siren you were.

“Oh, Vik- Viktor, fuck!” you exclaimed, as the Zaunite greedily ate you out, “Feels so good, so good!” Viktor shifted from your folds to your clit, giving it a harsh suck to test the waters. After hearing your unadulterated whines of ecstasy, Viktor latched on hard to your clit and suckled on it, your juices coating his chin. You thrust your hips, as you rode Viktor’s face without a care in the world. As for Viktor, being suffocated by your cunt was simply marvelous, his eyes rolling in the back of his head from the depleting oxygen. With each thrust, you gained more and more pleasure from the motion and the sucking and the—

You let out a sudden mewl, the knot in your tummy breaking and unleashing an intense orgasm. Your climax drenched Viktor’s whole face in pussy juice, as your clit pulsated inside his mouth. Viktor pulled off from your cunt and moved you towards his neck, content with having your thighs between his ears, “You taste like ambrosia,” Viktor panted, chin and mouth shining with your slick. Who knew that he had a way with words?

“So glad,” you rubbed your eyes and blinked a few times in an effort to recenter your surroundings, “So, so, so nice,” you began collecting your messy clothes when Viktor placed a hand on your ass, “We’re not done yet.”

“We’re not?” you asked with curiosity. Viktor touched his forehead to yours before giving you a peck on the lips, “Not until I feel you inside me.”

You quaked at his answer, so matter-of-fact and domineering. Viktor gave your ass a solid slap, smiling at how it jiggled upon contact, “On your hands and knees, ass up.”

“What about your leg?” you questioned him. Viktor waved you off with some reassurance, “You’re worth it, I’ll just take extra pain medicine later,” he discarded his remaining clothes, joining you in full nude glory. You positioned yourself the way he requested, hands and knees on the cold bathroom floor. Viktor groped at your ass and placed hot kisses from your neck all the way to the dimples near your butt, “Addictive,” he muttered, “You’re driving me mad.”

“Have your way with me,” you cooed to the Zaunite, “I’m all yours.”

It took everything in Viktor’s power not to shove his fat cock right into your pussy, “I’ll go in slow and just give me the okay when to move,” you gave him a thumbs up in reply. Something smooth—the tip of Viktor’s dick—touched your entrance and your toes curled in anticipation. Slowly, Viktor inserted himself inside you and, as gently as he could, slid the entirety of his length in one inch at a time. You groaned at the sensation, you never felt so full before, “Fuck… okay, I’m ready.”

Viktor gripped your sides, as he moved in and out of your cunt at a careful pace. His tip lightly kissed your cervix with each soft thrust, your body submitting itself to the handsome man behind you. Yet, you wanted more and you were patient, “Viktor, please! Faster and deeper, I wanna be fucked!” you whined, “I wanna be claimed by you!”

Adrenaline spiked inside of Viktor, as he pulled all the way out of you before mercilessly slamming his entire length back inside. You yelped like a wounded puppy, but any pain morphed into intense pleasure, as Viktor pounded your pussy like a madman. He huffed and puffed while his pelvis smacked against your ass, his mind clouded with an urge so deeply instilled in every human being.

The need to breed.

“Fuck!” he grunted, his grasp on your sides tightening, “I can’t believe I’m fucking my beautiful junior. I bet you never thought this moment would happen, huh?” his cock abused your cervix with each thrust, “I didn’t think so either, but fuck, you unlocked something in me that I didn’t know existed,” your superior lowered one hand from your hip and onto one of your breasts.

“I want you, I need you, I need to fill up your pretty cunt with my seed-” The sound of skin slapping against skin echoed off the bathroom walls.

“I have to make that tummy of yours all round and taut-” Your head bobbed to the rhythm of Viktor’s thrusts.

“You want that, don’t you? To have my kid, right? Oh, I think you would be an amazing mother-” each smack from Viktor into your cunt forced a moan out of you.

“Can I cum inside you? Please?” Viktor sounded so needy and pathetic, hungry to satisfy his urges, “Gods, please say yes, I need it, please!” he begged.

“You can!” you sobbed, tears of rapture rolling down your fat cheeks, “Knock me up, sir! I need it, too!”

With one last guttural moan, Viktor emptied his load inside you, coating it in hot sticky seed. You clenched down on his cock and milked every last drop out, much to Viktor’s delight. Soon, he finished up inside of you and pulled out, some of the white creamy liquid pouring out of your fucked out pussy. Viktor shoved his fingers inside and you let out a wanton gasp, “I can’t allow any to leak out,” he rasped. You tilted your hips up to prevent any more cum from spilling out, relishing in the feeling of a cum-filled pussy.

Once satisfied, Viktor removed his fingers from your cunt and wiped any cum on his thigh. You collapsed down on the bathroom floor and flipped yourself onto your back, utterly shattered from such intense sex. Viktor joined you on the floor and latched his spindly body onto yours, partaking in your soft warmth. You returned the Zaunite display of affection to Viktor, touching your forehead briefly against his, “That was… just… wow,” there were no words in the English language that could properly describe how incredible you felt.

Viktor snuggled closer into you, “Wow, indeed,” he sighed aloud, “We must do this again in the future.”

“Oh, yeah?” you couldn’t help but grin, “Not a one-time thing, huh?”

“Not after I got a slice of the heavens from you.”

・・・・☆・・・・☆ ・・・・

Outside the bathroom, a familiar muscular man stood guard, shooting passerbys a sheepish look whenever their eyes perked up at the sound of the moans and such from inside the bathroom. Jayce held a spare sweater in his hands, he had run to assist you after Viktor. It was the gentleman’s thing to do, he did spill coffee on you and ruin your blouse.

Instead, the sweater acted as a makeshift barrier to hide his boner, too large to be concealed by hands alone, as Jayce unfortunately overheard the entire exchange between you and Viktor.

Guess me and V do have the same type, maybe I’ll get a chance in the future.

#hexb0nes writes #arcane #league of legends #arcane viktor #arcane jayce #arcane viktor x reader #arcane jayce x reader #arcane viktor smut #arcane viktor x reader smut

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russellsppttemplates · 1 year ago

Text

All the milestones (Lando Norris)

Fraser came earthside earlier than you expected

Note: english is not my first language. Believe it or not, I'm also a preemie (genetically and health wise, I am a catch, I know). Jokes aside as this is a serious topic, I was born at thirty three weeks because of some complications and it all turned out well, but I am aware of what it entailed from people telling me and it isn't something I've seen around here! Knowing that the diversity I write brings comfort to read and to ask this warms my heart up so much 🫶 I'm also basing this off of my mum's experience!

Thank you so much to everyone who likes and reblogs, your feedback is appreciated 🤍 and I'm taking requests so if you have any ideas or concepts you want to share, feel free to do so as I'll try to get to them the best I can!

my masterlist

Tw: mentions c-section and themes related to hospital stays and procedures, prematurity, pre-eclampsia

Tag list: @myloverjk-blog

"I'm really sorry I can't go with you, darling", Lando apoligised as he set the plate with lunch in front of you, "it's okay, it's just an ultrasound", you responded, "we're just going to check if everything is alright with you, right, little one?", you tapped your babybump softly. At thirty weeks pregnant, you were starting to feel the tiredness and aches like you had felt in your previous pregnancy, only now you had a toddler to look after as well, so you had been taking it easy. Fortunately, you were able to juggle work and family life in a way that allowed you to make the minimum compromise to both spheres of your life.

"Drink your water, baby", Lando reminded you, tapping the jug, "I'm going to pick up my dad from the airport and then we'll both get Tilly. Are you feeling like going out for dinner or should I get take out and we eat here?", he questioned, taking a bite of his food.

"I'd prefer to stay in", you stated, "are you feeling like anything special?", he asked back.

"Right now I can't think of anything", you offered, not really looking forward to eating the delicious food in front of you if you were really being honest. Still, you manage to eat the most of it.

"Have a good meeting, Lan, I love you", you said as you put your coat on, grabbing your bag with all your documents.

"Be safe, okay, baby?", he checked, kissing the top of your head and then kissing your baby bump, "and you too, buddy, keep yourself and mummy safe and sound, don't give her too much trouble", he said, helping you out of the door before you went on your separate ways, "I love you, gorgeous mummy!", he winked before he got inside his car.

Once you arrived at the hospital and checked yourself in, your midwife Amelia greeted you in the examination room, "how have you been feeling, Y/N?", she asked as she slipped the bad on your arm to get your blood pressure numbers, sending the urine sample to the lab.

"I've been feeling a little tired, especially compared to last time, which I can only put down to having Tilly, and she's a very calm child", you giggled, remaining quiet as the machine got your numbers.

"These look quite high, did you run up here?", she asked, "no, I got here earlier than I expected actually, I've been sitting on the waiting room for a bit", you scrunched your face.

"We'll just wait for your results and then we'll see if it's something we have to wordy about", she tranquilized, "let's see you baby boy, shall we?", she smiled as you lifted your shirt, letting her apply the cream and move the wand around.

"There's your son, Y/N", she smiled, "He's a bit quiet, but the heartbeat sounds good", she smiled, taking a few more pictures so you could bring them home for Lando and Matilda to see.

A knock on the door alerted you both as Amelia was taking your measurements, "I have the results for Y/N Y/L/N-Norris", your OB checked, seeing you in the room, "Hi, Y/N, I thought I'd only see you later", she said as she walked in. She pulled on a stool and sat on it, "your results are indicating that you might be in pre-eclampsia", she said as she showed the tablet's screen to Amelia, her stern expression confirming your suspicions on how serious the situation was, "your body is having trouble keeping up with everything, hence your high blood pressure and your urine results suggest your kidneys are working overtime as well", Dr. Martin said as you straightened up, hands coming to wrap around your baby bump protectively, "your baby is fine, so that's not a big worry, but we do think it would be best if we delivered him tonight", she advised.

"But he's too small", you argued.

"You're at thirty weeks, which isn't ideal, but the survival rate is very very high for babies born at this time, and we also have a team that is specialised in preemie care, so he will be in the best hands", she comforted, "we need to give you corticosteroids to make sure the baby's lungs are ready for when he comes earthside, we'll get you admitted and monitor you and the baby to make sure he's not struggling either. In a few days, depending on how this goes, we'll do a c-section. I know it's not ideal, but this is the best way to make sure you and baby boy stay safe".

Sighing, you nodded, "okay, whatever is best for both of us", you asserted, "I just need to call Lando - my father in-law is coming to stay for a bit and they're getting Matilda from school", you thought out loud.

"Absolutely, dear, everything is going to be just fine", Amelia conforted while Dr. Martin set you up to go to a room.

Lando helped Matilda up to her car seat, strapping her in as she spoke to his father, "and did you have a good day, princess?", Adam asked, "yes, we coloured lots and we saw a couple of butterflies when we were having our snack!", she smiled as Lando drove home.

The car system alerted them of a call from you, "hey, beautiful, I'm in the car with my father and Tilly - say hi to mummy, babygirl!", he encouraged, "Hi, mummy!", she cheered, "Hey Y/N", Adam greeted too.

"Hey, guys! Lando, can you give the phone to your dad, please?", you asked, "sure, love", he said as he disconnected the phone from the car, nodding his father to take the phone in the console.

"Hey, Y/N, is everything alright?", Adam asked over the phone, "Hey, Adam, I hope you travelled well! I'm not sure if Lando told you, but I had an appointment today, and it turns out I have to be admitted", you began, "I don't want to worry him, much less when he's driving, so as soon as you get home, can you tell him to call me back again, please? Baby Fraser might join us sooner than we expected", you mumbled, nerves obvious in your voice as Adam stayed with a neutral face.

"Absolutely, Y/N, I'll let him know", he said before hanging up.

"What was it? Is everything alright?", Lando asked, knowing there would be a reason as to why you didn't want to have everyone listening to the conversation.

Checking the rearview mirror to see Matilda playing with one of her books, Adam clarified Lando, "she is going to stay at the hospital for a little longer than she expected for some check ups, she didn't want Matilda to hear about it", he said. It wasn't too much of a lie, and he certainly didn't want to scare anyone and since Lando would be calling you anyway, it could wait for a bit, "she asked you to call her when you got home. Don't worry, I'll keep Matilda entertained", he smiled.

Once they arrived, Adam left his things in the guest bedroom and met Matilda in the kuchen, "grandpa will make you some snacks. What do you want, darling?", he asked as he urged Lando to go and make a call to you.

"Hi, baby", Lando said as you picked up, "dad said you wanted me to call you, is everything alright?", he asked as he stepped inside the bedroom, hanging his coat in the closet.

"Hi, my love", you sighed and sending Lando into alert, "when they did my check up, Amelia took my blood pressure and it was really high, and my urine sample didn't look great either. It turns out I'm in pre-eclampsia and they want to keep me for observation, and it's likely Fraser will join us in the next few days", you added, "I need you here -, and things for me", you let out.

"Are you okay? I'll start packing right away", he said as he put his phone on speaker, looking for pyjamas and toiletries.

"My blood pressure is high - so far there's no distress for the baby, and they want to keep him in for as long as they can", you explained, "I, I am fine staying here on my own, that's okay, but I really need you here for a bit", you asked, "of course, my love. I'm going to pack these up quick and I'll be there. I love you", he said before you said it back, putting his phone in his pocket and zipping the bag.

"Daddy, where are you going?", Matilda asked as she saw the bag, "princess, mummy is going to stay in the hospital for a bit so the doctors can make sure her and baby are okay, and daddy is going to take a few things for her", he announced, crouching down so he was at her level.

"Is mummy sick?", she pouted, "she's a little tired, so they're going to make sure she rests up as much as she can", he slipped out, "I'm going to be there for a little bit to giver her her pyjamas so she's comfy, and then I'll be right back, okay? Can you stay here with grandpa?", he asked.

"Okay, daddy", she said before walking away, "but wait!", she called from the hall.

"I'll get dinner started and tuck her in if it gets too late - she didn't want me to tell you until you were home", he apoligised, "I know, I know, thanks for being here, it was bloody good timing", Lando mused.

Matilda came back with one of her stuffed toys, a McLaren bear she loved, "this is for mummy, so she doesn't sleep alone", she smiled sweetly. Maybe her innocence was positive because it meant she was dealing with the situation quite well.

"I'll give it to mummy, baby girl, I bet she'll love it", he smiled, kissing her cheek and leaving to the garage so he could drive to the hospital.

When he arrived, Amelia walked up with him as she told you all there was to know, knocking on your room door before they stepped inside.

"Darling", he said, setting the bag down and sitting next to you on the bed, kissing your forehead protectively, "how are you?", he asked.

"Fine, although I don't think it has really sunk in", you mumbled, playing with his fingers, "how is Tilly?", you wondered.

"She gave you Mr. Brown", he said as he fished out the bear from the bag, "she said she wanted you to have it so you wouldn't be alone in here", he smiled.

After spending as much time as he could with you, he bid you goodbye and went home, finding his father washing up the dishes as Matilda got her pyjamas on for the night, "I have a tupperware for you in the fridge if you want something to eat".

"Thanks, I've got it from here though - c'mon, little miss, we're going to sleep!", Lando hoisted her up, holding her on his hip as they walked upstairs to the bedroom, "can I sleep in your bed, daddy?", Matilda spoke in a small voice, "I don't want you to be alone either", she admitted.

Smiling at her sweetness, he nodded, "of course you can, love. Mummy sent her goodnight wishes for you, and maybe we can visit her tomorrow, how does that sound?", he smiled, "yes, please, daddy!".

"I made these for you, mummy, so your room is nice and colourful!", Matilda smiled as Lando let you in for a cuddle, your little girl getting help from her grandfather at ripping the tape so she could display her drawings she brought you almost daily, only missing days where Landk hadn't been able to bring her to the hospital because of their schedules.

"That's beautiful, darling, thank you so much", you gushed before turning to Lando, "has she cried again?", you whispered. You had been in the hospital for five days now, and two nights ago Matilda started with what was a tantrum at first and then evolved to crying about the fact that you weren't home. Lando was able to talk it out with her, welcoming her and allowing her to talk about how she was feeling and how it was beyond the fact that her tights were itching her.

"No, yesterday she told me she couldn't wait for you to come home, and that you were taking longer than she liked", he snickered, "always little miss rushing when it comes to you", he kissed the side of your head. Even though she was a daddy's girl through and through, she never made you feel left out.

"Y/N", Dr. Martin called after she stepped inside the room, "Oh, Matilda, you're so grown up already! Time flies by", she said as she waved at your little girl while Adam pulled her to sit on his lap, whispering "That's mummy's doctor, she is going to check up on her so you have to keep quiet, okay?" into her ear.

"I was checking your results, and I think between tonight and tomorrow, we might have to deliver your baby boy", she stated, everyone in the room straightening up as Matilda tried to read the adults' faces.

"His lungs look really good in the ultrasound we did this morning - as you know those were our biggest concerns, so we'll come up to monitor you, okay?", she rubbed your shoulder comfortingly before excusing herself.

"Well, I think it's best if we get going, then", Adam said as he got up, coming up to kiss the top of your head and squeeze your hand in his.

"Mummy, I know you're going to do very well", she said, earning small giggles around the room, "when can I come and meet the baby?", she stepped up to give you a kiss.

"We will have to see how it all goes, princess, but when you can, you'll be the first to come, okay?", you smiled, brushing the curls out of her eyes and kissing her head.

"I'll drop these guys home, get the baby bag and then I'll be back", Lando said, kissing your lips and your baby bump, "you stay in there for just a little longer, okay buddy?".

By the time Lando got back to the hospital, you had already been given a few medications to prep you for the c-section, "Kelly and Max advised that I shopped for some smaller clothes, so I have those in there", he tapped the baby bag, "and how are you feeling?", he cupped your cheek.

"My blood pressure is really high, so they're thinking about putting me under, like, full body anesthesia", you bit your lip. Getting surgery was already a big thing, but being completely under was another.

"Oh, okay", Lando gulped, "they won't let me be in there then", he realised, "that's not how we wanted this to happen, but it's going to be okay, gorgeous. You're the strongest woman I know, you're going to be just fine", he smiled, "and our baby boy will come out screaming and he will be the strongest little one ever", he said, trying to convince you and himself of his words. He was scared too, but it wouldn't do you both any good to dwell on it too much.

Knocking on the door, one of the lovely interns and Amelia came to get you, "are we all ready? I'm afraid you already know this, Lando, but you won't, be able to be with us in the OR", she apoligised, "I'll wait right here, if that's okay", your husband suggested, kissing you one last time before they wheeled you off, "I love you, Y/N", he muttered against your lips.

While he waited, he looked at the drawings in the room with precise attention, finding one where Matilda drew the four of you, her brother in your arms and Lando holding her hand, names scribbled under each person in Adam's writing.

Less than an hour later, Amelia stepped into the room, Lando getting up from his spot on the chair immediately, "everything went well, they were weaning Y/N off of the anesthesia, she's going to the PACU until she wakes up and then back here", she smiled, "your little boy is in the neonatal unit, do you want to come and meet him?", she asked, Lando letting out a sigh of relief at her words, "I'll let you know when Y/N comes back to the room", she ensured, having been in the job long enough to know the dilemma of wanting to be in two places at the same time.

"Yes, let's go", he said as he straightened up his sweater, "can I hug you?", he allowed himself to feel emotional, Amelia's open arms offering him a little comfort, "they're both alright, Lando, you have such a beautiful family", she cooed.

Walking with him to the neonatal care unit, she helped him into one of the gowns as they greeted the other parents inside along with all of the staff, "this is your little boy", she said, offering him a sanitizer for his hands, "he can't eat on his own just yet, so that single tube on his nose is feeding him, the other one is giving him oxygen, and those stickers are to make sure his heart is doing okay - little milestones and little victories", she explained as Lando took him in.

Surely, he was much smaller than Matilda, but he could already spot some similarities, "Can I touch him?", he asked, weary of disturbing the perfectly architected environment inside the incubator, "yes, of course! Just be mindful of the wires and tubes", she encouraged, opening the little doors so Lando could touch your son.

"Hey, buddy", he spoke as he touched his tiny fingers, "you're already such a fighter, breathing so well without ventilation", he cooed. He looked up all the complications and when he didn't see a mechanical ventilator, he couldn't help but feel proud of the baby, "he is, we did all the tests and for now supplemental oxygen seems to be enough", Dr. Martin said softly, not wanting to spook them as she showed up, "everything went well with Y/N, she should make a full recovery once it heals", she rubbed his back.

"Thank you", he said, keeping the tears at bay as he looked back at Fraser, "you're so tiny they had to roll up your diaper, hm little love?", he spoke, "there are so many people who love you and they have so much of it to give you".

A little while later, Amelia told him they were taking you up to your room, so Lando said goodbye to Fraser, "I'm going to see mummy, Fraser, and I'm going to tell her how much of a higher you are, I love you", he cooed one last time, rubbing his arm before taking his hands away, closing the little doors and folding the gown for later.

Walking into the corridor to your room, Lando could spot you in the other end, smiling as you spotted him too, "nearly beat you in this race", you smiled at him as he gestured for them to wheel you into the room, "everything went as expected, Dr. Martin will be up shortly to speak to you two", one of the interns said.

"How are you feeling, gorgeous?", he said, brushing your hair away from your eyes and behind your ears, "I'm fine, the meds are helping with the pain, I'm sure", you giggled, "they gave me a good dose".

"That's nice, at least", he said, "I've texted everyone to let them know you were okay and everything went well", he added.

"Have you seen him yet?", you asked, "yes, I have", Lando beamed, "He's very tiny and he looks a little bit like Tilly already. And he's such a fighter, too! He only had those little pin-like tubes to help him breathe, they didn't need any incisions or anything. I would've taken a picture but I couldn't take my hands away from him", he admitted.

"Hopefully soon I can see him", you gulped, knowing it would off the books for a bit since you had abdominal surgery.

"All in due course, baby. I'm so happy you're both fine", he kissed your forehead.

"I just want to hold my baby!", you hiccuped, wiping the tears falling on your cheeks while Amelia conforted you, "just one more day, Y/N, maybe two at maximum to make sure you're healing well, too", she smiled apologetically.

A knock on the door alerted you as Lando and Matilda walked inside, making you wipe your cheeks quickly, "mummy!", she cheered softly, approaching you and climbing on the bed softly since she knew you were healing, "have you been crying, mummy?", she said, hugging your arm and resting her head there.

"Mummy is upset because I can't go and see Fraser today", you explained as Lando kissed the top of your head.

Amelia excused herself as you caught up with everything back home, "grandpa asked me to give you kisses", Matilda recalled as she kissed your cheeks, "his plane has landed alresdy", Lando added, "That's nice of him, thank you darling".

"We can go and meet Fraser, Tilly", Lando said as the window they allowed visitors in was coming to the half-time mark, "I'm going to give him loads of kisses from you mummy, don't worry about it!", your daughter said sweetly as she climbed off the bed, "I'm going to try and FaceTime, okay?", Lando confirmed, handing you your phone before they left for the neonatal unit.

"Matilda, darling, you have to put this on, okay?", one of the nurses gave her a mask, "she's in nursery and she might have caught some bug that isn't showing symptoms yet and it could be harmful for the babies", he checked with Lando as your husband nodded.

"It's like a costume, Tilly!", Lando tried to make it fun for her, adjusting the gown and then the mask around her face, "you can't go around touching things, okay princess?", he stated as she nodded, ready to meet her little brother.

Lando got himself gowned and led them to Fraser's incubator, "that is Fraser, baby", he cooed, typing on his phone inside the clear bag and FaceTiming you like he promised so you too could see the moment they met for the first time.

"He's so tiny", she gasped, standing on the stepping stool so she could see him properly, "I can't kiss him, can I?", she asked and Lando shook his head, watching you smile on the screen, "I'm going to blow him the kisses I have from mummy then", she said, her hand making the movements from her covered mouth to her brother, "I love you, Fraser, and mummy loves you too, she can't be getting because her tummy still hurts a little", she told him.

"This just makes you want to have another right away, doesn't it?", Lando croaked out as he wiped a tear from his eye, your wide eyes looking at him, "not anywhere in the near future - my body knows that much!", you giggled at the soft sight, "but it is incredibly cute, yes", you smiled as tears fell on your cheeks too.

"Look, mummy! He moved his hand, he's saying hello to you", Matilda smiled, "He's saying he wants to see you, too!".

You were finally able to stand up and sit in a wheelchair, so your other goal for the day was going to see your son.

Amelia was the first to say she would take you, helping you sit and getting you there, "That's your little boy right there", she pointed as you were filled with giddiness and excitement.

Wheeling you to face plastic bassinet, your hand went straight inside, "he doesn't need oxygen anymore?", you asked his doctor, noticing the single tube you recognised as a feeding tube, "no, not anymore", he said, "we ran some tests this morning and he's doing just fine on his own, strong set of lungs he has! He woke two of the other babies up yesterday", he smiled.

Chuckling, you touched his arm softly, his hands opening and closing, "do you want to hold him?", he asked, catching you by surprise. Until now, no one ever held him as to make sure the treatments being done were working as best as they could.

"Can I?", you asked, eyes hopeful, "me and the rest of the team think he's finally strong enough to move out of here actually", he added, "not enough to go home just yet, but he can be in your room. This way you can have him close to you and of anything happens or you need help, the staff in your floor know what to do. He just needs to be able to feed without a pump, so either breastfeeding or bottle feeding", he stated.

"Wow, okay, I wasn't expecting this, I was so happy that I got to see him", you teared up, bringing your arms to position so the doctor could place your baby in your arms, mindful of the feeding tube that was still in him, "hey, my love", you cooed, touching his cheeks, "I'm your mummy. I know you were rushed out of my tummy, and it was scary for both of us, but it's looking up now", you cried, Amelia wiping your cheeks as she smiled too.

"Do you mind if we take his tube out now? Might be a little better for this little guy to be in his mummy's chest", the doctor suggested, getting the supplies he needed and setting them in the tray.

"It's okay, little guy", he said as he pulled it out, baby Fraser crying at the discomfort you could only imagine as you rubbed his back, "it's okay, my love, mummy's here to make it better", you shushed him, kissing his head multiple times.

"There, all done!", the doctor said, "if you want, you can feed him here or in your room, where you feel best", he wondered, "could we go to the room, please? I have my supplies there, too", you asked.

You had been pumping milk out since it came in, and you were finally able to feed him straight from your nipple, "okay, little one, you can't get lazy on us now that mummy has you in her room", Amelia encouraged, tapping his cheek slightly as he began suckling on your nipple, "there we go!", she cheered, "I told you it would get better, didn't I?", she winked at you.

When Lando and Matilda came for their daily visit, they didn't expect to see you walking around the room, your back facing the door, "you're up, mummy, that's good!", your daughter said as you turned around, showing her brother on your chest, "oh", she gasped.

"He passed all his tests, and he's getting chubby too", you cooed, squishing his thigh softly as Lando took the sight in, Matilda holding onto you as you patted her head and held your son. Your family was complete.

"That's daddy, Fraser", you cooed, pointing at Lando as your baby boy looked around to the two new people in the room.

"Can I have a cuddle?", Lando whispered before you transferred Fraser to his arms, your little boy curling up against him just like he had been curled up to you.

"Does this mean you get to go home?", Matilda asked, hugging you properly as you sat down on the bed with her, "not for a few days still, they just need to make sure Fraser is alright", you informed, "then we can go home and the four of us are going to have loads of fun", you smiled.

"Tilly, can you help me here, please?", Lando called as her footsteps approached your bedroom, "can you get me that bedding from the drawer, please?", Lando asked as he held the mattres up, not wanting to miss the exact placement of the sheet, "thank you, baby, you're such a clever girl", he complimented, folding the corner in and letting the mattress fall back into place.

"When mummy comes home tonight, is Fraser coming with her?", she wondered, touching the next to me bassinet you kept in your room for the baby to sleep in the first few months, "yes, he is, he's finally good and big enough to come home, no more hospital visits", Lando sighed. The last couple of weeks were hard. Juggling things on his own made him even more appreciative of you and the efforts you made to make sure everything was smoothly running in the house, as well of your friends and family who suported your family in every way they could.

"That's going to be nice, the hospital smells funny", she scrunched up her nose, "and it's going to be like before but with baby Fraser?", she wondered.

"At first mummy will need our help in many things - she still has some recovery to do, but then it will be back to normal, yes", Lando offered, "and we'll have Fraser to go with us in our adventures".

"I can't wait to show him my soft blankets and my toys", she beamed, helping Lando with the bed and then getting ready to pick you up from the hospital.

"Thank you again for all of your work and dedication, we truly can't say it enough for all you've done for our family", Lando said to the team as they discharged you from the hospital, waving at Fraser in his carrier as he looked around.

By the time the four of you were back home, you ate dinner on the sofa, Matilda cuddled up to your side while Fraser slept in your chest, Lando holding the four of you in his embrace as much a she could, "we're finally all together", you smiled, "the Norris family is all together in one place we it should be", he said, kissing your lips softly, hand coming to rest on top of yours in Fraser's back as Matilda smiled up at you, "this is the best day ever", she murmured.

Post partum blurb

#lando norris imagine #lando norris x reader #lando norris fluff #lando norris fanfic #lando norris x you #dad!lando x reader #f1 fluff #f1 imagine #f1 fanfic #f1 x reader

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edgeray · 10 months ago

Note

Ray! 🍅 anon here, I said I wasn't going to request but there's one idea I've been really, REALLY itching at.

So you know how you reblogged "cold nights" by beiibeii? Yeah about that... I think I cooked an angst idea of this on a related tangent? (If you choose to write this, ofc)

How about Mother!Reader who is faced with the same scenario of Arle neglecting them to the point that she loses hope in their relationship? Think of the angst when the children constantly remind their Father of important dates but she's away or somehow missing most of them because of work. To the point reader just implies for them to stop trying and accepts the fact that they married Arlecchino but is now simply the Knave's wife? Like even the children can see them losing hope which is why they sometimes lowkey plead with their Father to actually pay more attention to Mother. Mother marrying Father means that Mother is strong but behind their strong facade you can see their sadness! You can feel their loneliness! And their sense of isolation and sorrowful acceptance of their new reality. And Arle does not pick up on the subtle signs until it's Too Late. Like. Reader in the coffin Late.

And as the Knave's wife Reader does need to undertake missions like in "I am Fine in Your Arms" but because reader has lost so much hope in living a wife outside of being the Knave's wife, reader does not make an effort to return alive. The angst of the burial, maybe the children blaming their Father etc. The really young ones aside, I don't think they would be actively angry with their Father, just very, VERY, disappointed. HotH would lose its warmth for a while before Lyney, Lynette and Freminet try their best to build it back (but of course, it never becomes as warm as it used to be)

Whether or not you choose to give this one a happy ending is up to you, but on my end the only happy ending that I cooked up for them is that Arle wakes up in the next Samsara with all these memories of losing Reader and prevents the relationship from going South in the first place. (Bonus points if Reader also has the memories and compares it to how they were treated by Arle previously, makes a comparison, and goes "How I wish this were my Arle" without knowing that it actually IS their Arle, just acknowledging she fucked up BIG time and is now making heavy amends for it. and Arle Knows because of that look that Reader gives her, sorrow and joy in a complex blend.)

...I think by now you can tell that I'm an angst writer too HAHSHHSHA Nobody leaves my fics without getting a knife and I promise it's just for the plot (like we always say).

I've still been keeping up with your writings (Beauty and The Beast actually fits, holy-) (Someone send Siren!Arle a whole farmhouse of ham for her consumption please) and yes I agree that you've been pumping out bangers after bangers. (I mean. Given that, you probably can afford to be a little indulgent? If writing this much quality about your muse doesn't give you the OK to put your hands all over them, abs and all, what does?)

As always, prioritise your sanity and schedule first, stay well rested and hydrated!

Lost Warmth

(Arlecchino x GN! Reader)

A/N - Link to my momma's (@beiibeiii) piece right here. If I see you read this before reading the masterpiece I just linked, know that I am a very disappointed axolotl. 😔 Anyways, you might be able to tell just how long this has been sitting in my inbox… haha… my bad guys. T^T. Thank you for giving me the opportunity to write more angst. :3 And thank you for the additional comments 🍅 anon. I do have quite a soft spot for siren! arle, seeing that she was my first request (and requested from my momma :3). Wanted this to be a little longer, but I do have to wake up earlier tomorrow, so this is what you get T^T. Hopefully it's still good. Content warnings / info - angst, character death (duh), reader is referred to as ‘Mother’ but is otherwise GN!, 1.4k words

Cold is a feeling you've long gotten used to. Cold is your husband's dismissal of your existence, with every interaction ending with her blunt words and back towards you, leaving you with a crumbling heart. Cold are the long nights as you anxiously wait for Arlecchino's appearance for a candlelit dinner you spent half the day preparing, only for her never to return until you fell to exhaustion on the couch, a flower bouquet that remains unreceived in your hands. Cold is the creeping loneliness in the late hours of the night, when you've finally grown tired of anticipating someone that will never come, and returned to bed alone. Cold is the way you shiver underneath the thickest of blankets, no one's body warmth to sink into, no one's softly whispered words into your ear to drift you to sleep. Cold is when instead of your husband, only dim stars, a bottle of liquor, and the tears that stream your face join you in bed.

When was the last time you had felt warmth?

You recall when the Knave first started courting you, how gentlemanly she was for such a rumored cruel Harbinger. You were first just a caretaker of the House of the Hearth, this small orphanage which you quickly found to be home for you. You couldn't help but adore the endearing children, watching as you slowly became a staple in this family. Despite your best efforts of hiding it, Arlecchino noticed when you snuck in the occasional pastry or cake from the town's most lavious bakery for the children, out of your own paycheck as well. It was then, your husband admitted, when she first fell for you. It had taken her months of encouragement from her ‘pestering’ children before she asked you out, and it was impossible to not fall for her charm.

How could you not? Not when she held you like you were her world. Not when she viewed you higher than the Tsaritsa herself. Not when her touch was heavenly, her words silky and sweet. When she proposed to you, your heart leapt with levity, and you thought your life was perfect now. A warm house, fitted with warm parents, that was what you had had, you had never felt so content.

Then came the long nights. Nights when she trudged home later than usual, where she fell asleep without a word but sunk into your arms still. Then she started forgetting, forgetting about the dates and birthdays, and anniversaries more and more. At first, you chalked it up to her demanding Harbinger duties, but as time grew and the excuses started to run out, the perfect life you knew was crumbling.

You became aware of this two years after your marriage when you had been preparing dinner for the two of you once she arrived home, slow cooking a steak since the early hours of the morning. Just as you exited the kitchen, you heard some children surrounding your husband before she left for another Harbinger meeting, telling her that you had a surprise for her once she came home and how excited you were for her to enjoy a new recipe you created. Your heart swelled with hope and appreciation for your children, especially when Arlecchino promised she would return in time.

You should have known better.

You ate your tear-ridden steak alone and went to bed, leaving the steak out for her for whenever she returned home. Just like how you fell asleep, you woke up without your husband's presence, and when you arrived at the kitchen, the meat and the note besides the plate were untouched.

You tried to eat the cold steak for lunch as well. You threw it away at the first bite. That day, you gathered your children, pleading them not to ‘pester’ Father with more reminders, as she was very busy. All that you gained back from the children was pitied expressions, and the agony in your chest worsened. Your children could pity you, but your husband couldn't? Even with your husband's coldness, you still carried out your Mother role, if only for the children. You cannot deny that the children's antics helped you forget the ever-present void inside you, caused by Arlecchino.

You never learned the reason for Arlecchino's behavior, why she had grown so cold towards you. Now, you suppose, you would never know.

Red fills your hazy vision as you lay on the ground, your entire body aching and fatigued, desperate gasps for air while your heart pounds in your eardrums. Your side was sliced, and the crimson liquid quickly poured out of the wound while you tried to stop the bleeding, but to no avail.

This is your end, you think to yourself as you weakly turn on your side, every nerve in your body protesting against the movement. Your bloodied hand comes into view, your engagement and wedding ring gleaming slightly underneath the blood. The rings bring your thoughts to Arlecchino–oh, how you imagine the common disappointment in her otherwise apathetic expression, disappointment at your mission's failure. Your eyes bubbled and blurred with tears, vivid memories of your wedding flashing through your mind. The wedding ring is beautiful, still polished with that bold scarlet, the same color of her eyes, the same eyes you could never stop drowning in.

Would she even know your absence? Would she ever acknowledge you, treat you properly like her partner even if you did return? You doubt it. Did you want to return a cold bed, to a husband that does not love you, to a house no longer warm?

It's warm.

Your body feels like fire courses through your veins as you feel inexplicably hot, yet it's a welcomed heat. It's the first time you've felt this, but it feels familiar, comforting, like a hearth, and you want nothing more than to surrender to it. It soothes your heartbeat and calms your breath, easing your body as if you were to sink into the most plush of beds, swallowed by the thickest of blankets. The warmth coils around you, wrapping you like a cozy embrace, evoking you to sleep. Your eyes flutter shutter, a faint smile plastered on your lips.

It feels just like Peruere's arms.

—

Arlecchino receives a letter addressed to her on the third day you've been sent on a mission. The contents make her drop the paper, and she rushes outside, without an additional word, leaving the House.

The children do not see her until she returns late into the night, a body wrapped in cloth in her arms. Arlecchino raised her children to be smart, to be attentive, to be logical. Whose body it is, they realize with little difficulty.

The children weep that night. Arlecchino does not. How can she, when her source of emotions is gone?

The burial takes place soon afterwards. As your body is placed into the ground, Arlecchino can feel the weight of her children's stare on her back. The charged tension between her and the children is palpable without words. She cannot discern which of the two reactions cut deeper. The seething fury underneath the oppressive grief for the young ones, having to lose another parent, or the crushing dismay inhabited by the older ones, specifically the twins and Freminet.

Their thoughts are clear, even when none of them speak out loud.

How could you fail Mother?

The House of the Hearth no longer suits the orphanage's name, not with your missing presence. There is no warmth, no matter how much the trio tries to fuel a lost flame. Even with Arlecchin's pyro vision, it is futile.

Arlecchino stands before your gravestone, a bouquet of your favorite flowers in her hand, and she rests it beside the other bouquets by your grave. Six bouquets in total, for each day after your burial.

“For all the flowers, I should have given you, my love,” she whispers as she addresses you, glancing up to the heavens. The last two words make her feel like a fraud, undeserving of calling you hers, when she had clearly never shown so.

Arlecchino, the Knave, the Fatui Harbinger, does not plead, does not beg, does not kneel. However, her knees drop to her dirt, and she grovels. “Please… wait for me one more time, my dear. Once I meet you again, I promise I'll never leave you alone, I'll never let you out of my arms again.”

There is no reply.

Arlecchino feels cold.

#arlecchino x reader #arlecchino x you #arlecchino #genshin impact x reader #genshin impact x you #genshin x reader #genshin x you #genshin impact fanfics #genshin impact fics #genshin fanfics #genshin fics #edgeray.writes #edgeray.requests #edgeray.🍅anon

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lemotmo · 2 months ago

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Oh this interesting

Q. Do you have any idea why Deadline would have deleted only that line but not address the removal in any way?

A. I have a ton of asks about the Deadline writeup so I am going to answer as much as I can here to hopefully cover as many of the asks as I can. For context, and much to the disappointment of a certain group of people, Deadline is not equal to TVGuide, TVLine or Entertainment Weekly. They don't write opinion pieces. They don't have writers on staff who are assigned to watch a show and cover that show. That's not what they do. They are basically the AP News of Entertainment news, if that makes sense. They don't have a particular slant or side they gear their coverage towards. In other words they don't have Buddies or other fandom people on staff. Sorry to the 'mob' (for what it's worth though less than 200 people is not a mob) who wrote angry, threatening emails demanding its correction. Not a soul at Deadline read a single word of those emails, just like no one at ABC is reading those emails, but I digress. They report entertainment news. That's it. Trade news that is relevant information.

Also for what it's worth the information they were given would not have come from the show or even Tim, it would have come directly from an approved media release directly from ABC. The media relations department would have sent them a release directly and the release would contain the information they were okay with being reported regarding the show's renewal. Most of the time those memos would say something along the lines of 'approved for immediate release' meaning the journalist was free to write about everything the release covered. Occasionally those same releases will have a second section that will say something along the lines of 'hold for release until (fill in the blank date)'. That indicates the information in that section of the memo is not approved for release at that time but needs to be held for a write-up planned for a later date. So in this case either the memo ABC sent Deadline was missing the 'hold for release' direction, or the journalist missed the request (which is not likely because this is Deadline and that's not something they're likely to overlook). Or quite simply the article dropped sooner than it was supposed to. We will most likely never know which of these is the real reason, I'm personally leaning towards the article dropped earlier than it was supposed to, but it doesn't really matter. The other question I'm getting a lot is why the line would have been removed without Deadline or the journalist adding a 'correction' or 'this article has been amended to correct an error'. Deadline is not going to do that if what they wrote was factually correct but released earlier than it was supposed to be. Releasing the information earlier than it was supposed to be is not the same thing as calling the information incorrect or misleading. The journalist is not required to say he misspoke if he didn't actually misspeak. There is no factual error within the article. The information was just released earlier than ABC wanted. That's why there's no note or correction amendment to the article. It's that simple. No conspiracy theories. No caving to lunatics. ABC just wasn't ready for that particular angle to be confirmed yet. Hope that helps!

Thank you Nonny!

Just leaving this here, because I have gotten a lot of asks about this. Thank you for clearing this up Ali.

Heads up! For anyone who is giving me the shifty eyes for reposting Ali's updates instead of reblogging. Read this.

Remember, no hate in comments, reblogs or inboxes. Let's keep it civil and respectful. Thank you.

If you are interested in more of Ali’s posts, you can find all of her posts so far under the tag: anonymous blog I love.

#anonymous blog I love #nonnies galore #buddie #eddie diaz #evan buckley #Deadline 911 article

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hmhas-00 · 4 months ago

Text

Ch. 16

Hit Me Hard & Soft

A/N- It gets pretty angsty this chapter & the next few chapters! I hope the girlies can work this one outttt…🤞🏻 Please like and reblog, it means so much to me! <3 ALSO I’ll be posting twice a week again starting next week. Tuesdays and Thursdays!😌

Remy’s POV

I looked at the time on my dashboard, anxiously tapping my foot against the weather mat in my car. It was 4:15pm and they were still not here. I don’t know what the hell the crack I was smoking earlier was laced with when I thought there was even a slight chance of me getting to San Jose by car on time. I searched for the fastest, cheapest flight out of LAX I could find, and booked it.

If I could get out of here and to the airport by 5:30pm, I’d make it on my flight on time and get to the concert by 8pm the absolute latest.

I got out of my car, headed straight to the women’s restroom, when I saw Joe and three other slightly younger men sitting at a table. They were loud, drinking out of fancy cocktail glasses, and barely even noticed me walk by. I made my way over to the table, probably looking confused and a little bit pissed off.

“I didn’t see you guys come in?” I stood by their table. The four of them turned to look, fixing their eyes on certain attributes, before Joe got up to pull my chair out so I could sit. His hand grazed my lower back, his touch invading my personal space, as I sat in the chair.

“Well, we were at the bar at first, getting a couple drinks.” Joe sat back down after me, reintroducing me to the corporate bodies next to me. His hand rested on my shoulder as I mentally took myself out of my own body to get through dinner.

“Would you like to order anything? We have sushi coming out any minute. You want a drink? It’s on the company card tonight.” One of the men, Victor, offered.

“I’m okay, Victor, thank you.”

“Please, call me Vic.” He insisted.

I nodded, smiling politely, wanting to get on with the reason I was here.

I began to bring up my ideas, explaining what Rachel and I wanted to do, and even opened up the opportunity for Joe to tell them how much he likes my writing. I felt like I was just there to be stared at, like a museum display that no one bothered to read the inscription on.

I watched as they looked me up and down while I spoke, taking their time to notice the square neckline held up by my ribbon shoulder straps. I tugged at the hem of my red dress, feeling exposed and in the wrong company. I very quickly noticed they weren’t really interested in what I had to say.

They would interrupt to compare what I was saying to something that didn’t really relate, as well as direct questions toward Joe, that should’ve been for me.

I found myself fighting to get a word in, as the room would fill with laughter due to their inability to be serious.

“Seriously. How many time a day do you need to make copies for this guy, huh?” The one named Connor joked.

I fake laughed, asking myself if this was even worth it at all. Maybe this is how they network. Maybe this is how I get in with the important people, I lied to myself. I had to play the game.

“So, Michael.” I put a hand on his arm, leaning in and noticing a wedding ring on his finger. “What’s good to drink here?”

I noticed his demeanor a little flustered, flipping through the drink menu for me. Side eyeing, I caught a glimpse of Connor looking at my legs. I gracefully cross them, showing off a little more skin.

Michael waved a waiter over, ordering me a Cosmopolitan. I hated cosmos. I smiled at him with my eyes. I sipped it anyway, making sure to be delicate and proper, unlike them.

“Are you sure you want to be writing these things, instead of posing for them?” Vic said.

“Oh Vic, it’s my dream to be a columnist.” I nodded, flipping my hair behind my shoulder. “Maybe I could show you some of my outlines?” I reached into my purse, pulling out my phone.

“You can just email those to us, sweetheart.” Vic shrugged me off.

Upon seeing my phone, I saw I had 4 missed calls from Billie. My stomach dropped, seeing it was 5 o’clock already, making me more anxious by the second.

“Excuse me a minute.” I stood up, sashaying towards the restrooms. I dial Billie, staring at myself in the mirror.

“Helloo.” She answered.

“Hey, sorry I didn’t answer sooner. What’s up?”

“I was checking on you. About what time are you getting here?”

“8pm the latest.”

“But, that’s right when I go on stage.”

“I’ll be there, don’t worry! We’ll do Guess together. Or Bad Guy. Whatever you want.” I adjust my strapless bra and breasts.

“Okay. I’ll see you there, then!” I could hear them sound checking instruments in the background.

“Of course. See you soon.” I hung up.

I walked out, knowing I had to beat traffic to make my flight on time. I sit back down as they feast on sushi. I grab a few pieces, careful not to get any soy sauce on my dress. They continued to talk through me and about me, without even really acknowledging me.

Anytime I contributed to the conversation, I swear they looked at me with pity in their eyes, like I was this ditsy, precious, little thing. It made me hate myself. I wish I was another man they could respect and admire.

“Gentlemen, you’ll have to carry on without me. But I thank you for your time. I had a great time with you.” I began to stand up.

“Oh, please, stay a bit longer!” Michael begged, waving the waiter over to get me another drink.

“Really, I need to get going. But please, enjoy yourselves.” I smiled, rage building inside me.

“Before you leave.” Connor stood up, with a glass of red wine in his hand. “You don’t spend an hour with a young lady like this and not give what she wants.”

I looked over at Joe as he stood too, “Rachel’s office is yours. She’s going to be working remotely from her apartment and we wanted you to have it.”

“The- the office?” I squinted, confused as to what he meant.

“Yes, for now, let’s not get ahead of ourselves.” He laughed, the rest of the men joining him.

I laughed in disbelief. “That‘s not what I wanted-“

“I look forward to those ideas of yours in my inbox tomorrow morning.” Connor leaned in to say goodbye. He hugged me, laying a clammy hand on my lower back.

Michael waited his turn before planting an uninvited peck on my cheek, and Vic gave me a goodbye hug, pressing his chest into mine a little too tight.

I nodded, my head throbbing and spinning from how ridiculous I felt being passed around like an appetizer.

I sped to the airport, making maneuvers I’ve never made before.

I made it 20 minutes before boarding began, going through security with nothing but my small, leather clutch. It didn’t even matter to me that my outfit was getting strange reactions from people passing by.

As if tonight couldn’t get worse, the pilot announced a delay due to an issue with the tarmac. You have to be kidding me. I text Billie I’ll be a little late, but would be there in time for Guess.

The next 2 hours go by and the plane finally lands in San Jose. I shoot out of my seat, not minding the people reaching for their overhead carry ons. All I care about is calling an uber to take me to the arena.

By the time my uber driver pulled up, it was 8:45pm. He did a double take, unlocking his car and greeting me.

“Hello, are you-“

“Remy, yes. I’m going to the SAP Center.”

He looked at me thru the rear view mirror and began to drive, noting my rush. “Is this a special event?”

“Kinda.” I tapped my foot, constantly checking the time. The acid in my stomach created a whirlpool of anxiety.

Eventually, we made it to the venue. I made sure to tip the driver, running as fast as possible, ignoring my aching feet in these heels.

I showed my backstage privileges to security at the door, hoping they wouldn’t hold me up much longer. By almost 9pm, I was finally backstage, where Maggie and Patrick greeted me and offered me food.

“I’m so late, did she already do Guess?”

She nodded. “You just missed it.” She looked like she knew Billie would be upset, like Billie already knew I wouldn’t be on time.

It felt awful, watching Billie do the barricade walk without me, smiling at her fans, taking the time to hold their hands up close. I watched the rest of the concert alone backstage on a screen, while Maggie worked her Support & Feed stand outside.

Once it was over, I stood up, fixing my dress and putting my heels back on.

Billie walked in a few minutes later holding her water bottle and a sweat rag. She looked at me, her head tilted, her brows furrowed, and her mouth slightly parted.

I braced for impact, hoping she wouldn’t be upset.

“What are you wearing?” She put her things down, taking off her rings.

I looked down at my bright red dress, “I had a work event, I didn’t even bother to change-“

“Yeah right. You wore that for work?” She stood, watching me trip over my words.

“It was at a restaurant- it doesn’t matter, I’m here now.” I anxiously laughed, hoping she’d stop focusing on that.

“Is that why you were late? You were eating with that girl? What was her name- Sydney?”

“Stevie, and no, if you must know, it was dinner at Nobu with Joe and a bunch of the executives from Variety.” I crossed my arms.

“Wait, wait, wait. What? Dinner? How’d you have dinner and drive up here, 5 hours away.” Her voice raspy as she tried to catch her breath. She needed her inhaler, I could tell.

“I didn’t. I flew on a plane.” I furrowed my brows. She was so upset, I felt like anything I said would automatically annoy her.

“You flew here? You mean this was your last stop of the night.” She scoffed. “What a waste of fossil fuels.”

“Billie, I’m so sorry, I thought it would work out better than this, and then my flight got delayed- Believe me, I tried my best to get here on time. It’s not my fault!”

“Nothing ever is, is it?” She sat on the couch. “You said you’d be here and you chose whatever the hell you were doing over keeping your promise.” Her voice was low and exhausted.

“Hey! It was for work! I couldn’t miss it! Joe promised it would get me closer to my own column! All three of the execs were there to listen to my ideas.” It stung knowing it wasn’t even worth it. But I didn’t want to add fuel to the fire

“Oh so that’s why you dressed like that! That’s why you’ve been dressing like that. Showing off, thinking it’ll get you in with the elites? Who told you that? Rachel?” She shook her head.

“What are you talking about?” I squinted my eyes.

“You send me pictures in your new work clothes, looking like the secretary every married piece of shit hides from his wife… you don’t even look like yourself anymore. And you’re fine with that. You’re fine with flaking on your friends, and giving yourself up, just to write some bullshit on a magazine no one even reads! You don’t even read it!”

“I- what the fuck do you mean!” I uncrossed my arms, feeling that sting. “I showed up! I’m here, and I tried my best! I’m sorry that I have to make just a few compromises so I can advance in my career!”

“Once you get this promotion you’ll have to make a few more compromises.” She held her fingers up, making air quotations. “And one day, you’re gonna realize you spent your whole life compromising, and never showed up for your friends or for yourself!” At this point, she was shouting. Every word resonated with me, but I didn’t want to face it.

“This is about you not understanding how much this means to me. You don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“No, I hate what those people have turned you into. Look at your inability to tell people no! Rachel takes advantage of you. She makes you do her work and she gets all the credit, and you let her! And Joe tells you where to be, and what to do whenever he wants! You haven’t taken a day off in so long! Even on weekends he makes you do shit for him! And you’re not even clocked in! You get paid salary, you’re screwing your self over! What- you think they’re giving you overtime? They know you’ll fucking do anything so they made you their bitch! And don’t even get me started on you wearing this shit just so they’ll look your direction!”

“Oh, fucking please! Look who’s talking! As if you even worked a day in your life! You have the perfect voice, the perfect face, you wear whatever the fuck you want, and everyone just fucking throws their money at you! You could show up and scream into the microphone, and still sell out arenas. Everyone says yes to you, whatever you want, whenever you want it, and if there’s ever an issue, you can pay for it to get solved. I have a family to take care of, I have bills to pay! I don’t get to travel the world and be admired! I have to bust my ass to barely make it to the end of the month!”

She stood up, shaking her head, “Oh hell fucking nah! You’re really going to go there? You know the hard work and dedication I’ve-“

“You’d never understand all the hard work and dedication that went into the position I have today-“

She cut me off, “WHAT POSITION? You mean the assistant to the assistant manager bro?”

“No! Thanks to them tonight, I have my own office now! And they asked me to email them my outlines for a new column! You swear I don’t know what the fuck I’m doing!”

“OHHH WOW! My bad! She has her own office now! She’s bad as fuck!” She waved me off.

“Yeah, sorry for assuming you’d give a fuck.”

“You lied to me saying you’d be a little late, knowing you were 5 hours away, because you double booked yourself, even though you pinky promised ME you’d show up! You took a flight to make up for your lie and contributed to global warming!! And meanwhile the ICE CAPS ARE MELTING! You know what next time- don’t even show up!” She ranted, throwing her hands in the air, pacing now.

“What about all of the stupid fucking things you’ve bought that you said you’d never buy if you had this kind of money? What about all the cars! Those burn fossil fuels too, genius!”

“I barely even drive them!”

“Exactly!! Stupid!”

“What does that even have to do with any of this?”

Flustered, I found anything to cling onto. “You’re judging me and you don’t even know what the hell you’re talking about! I can’t just drop a band and get whatever I want! I need theis job!”

“You can get any other job you want!”

“No! That’s you!” My speech rapidly increasing in pitch. “Look, Billie, I was trying to be supportive and show up for you, while also worrying about my career. When you couldn’t show up for me because of something happening in yours, I was never an asshole to you!” I pointed at her, watching her expression change.

“When I pinky promise to show up, I show up!” She got closer, staring in my eyes, her voice sharp and aggressive.

“I DID show up!” I looked at her, pronouncing every word forcefully.

“You know what I mean! I wouldn’t be 5 hours away and have to rush over! I would just- BE THERE!” Her voice broke, becoming creaky and guttural.

“Billie. I am trying my fucking best here.” I felt like I was being shot in the heart.

“No! You know how exhausting it is to rely on you, and trust you’ll be there, and every single time I end up disappointed! At some point, it’s not just you thinking about your career, it’s you not thinking about me.” She took a deep breath after finishing out her sentence, wheezing a bit, thanks to her asthma. She grabs her inhaler out of her pocket, taking a hit. I watched her stabilize her breathing. I tried to think of anything to respond with, but I didn’t even know where to start.

Billie continued, “You KNOW he’s using you. You KNOW those pigs aren’t the least bit interested in what’s on your mind. Joe didn’t even care about you until you started walking around the office in a mini skirt!”

“You just can’t fucking believe that one day I could be SOMEONE other than just Billie Eilish’s friend!”

“No? What I can’t believe, is that you’d really let some piece of shit treat you like that in front of people, and not even allow you to grow unless you suck his metaphorical dick. That’s abuse of power and you know it! And you of all people should know I know a thing or two about that!”

“You of all people should know how hard it is to accept it in the first place!” I shut her up.

She glared at me, her eyes glossing and her jaw clenching, like she wanted to cry. She scanned my body, ending her stare at my red, strapped heels.

“Just leave. Don’t worry about squeezing me into your schedule anymore.” She grabbed her things, throwing them in her duffle bag.

#Spotify #billie eilish #billie eilish fic #billie eilish fanfic #billie eilish fanfiction #billie eilish wlw #billie eilish lgbtq #billie eillish #billie eilish ftl #billie eilish f2l #friends to lovers #bestfriends to lovers #billie eilish x oc #billie eilish hit me hard and soft #hit me hard and soft

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witch1nghour · 12 days ago

Text

𝜗𝜚 ⠀𝗕𝗬 𝗧𝗛𝗘 𝗣𝗥𝗜𝗖𝗞𝗜𝗡𝗚 𝗢𝗙 𝗠𝗬 𝗧𝗛𝗨𝗠𝗕 ﹔ various sentence starters ( platonic/romantic/antagonistic/etc ) from TWILIGHT: SHOOTING DRAFT ( february 11, 2008 ) . please , like or reblog if you plan on using . don’t claim as your own . content warning : tw . part one.

I'd never given much thought to how I'd die.

dying in the place of someone I love seems like a good way to go.

I can't bring myself to regret the decision that brought me here to die.

have a good life.

it won't work again, baby.

your hair's longer.

he hasn't shut up about it since you told him you were coming.

yeah ... I think I remember.

are they always like this?

it's getting worse with old age.

too bad. would've been nice to know at least one person.

I'm kind of a suffer in silence type.

are you alright? I warned them not to make me play.

it's only a flesh wound.

that's why they kicked me out.

it's first grade all over again, and you're the shiny new toy.

they kinda keep to themselves.

I'm not even sure that's legal.

they're not actually related.

he's totally gorgeous, obviously.

but apparently, no one here is good enough for him.

don't waste your time.

I'll just endure it.

are people talking about them again?

ice doesn't help the uncoordinated.

be careful.

give it up for the rain.

I didn't have a chance to introduce myself last week.

you've been gone.

enjoying the rain?

seriously? you're asking me about the weather?

no. I don't like the cold. or the wet. or the gray. or parkas. or turtle necks.

I'm just trying to figure you out.

you're very hard to read.

did anyone see what happened?

I'm so sorry, I tried to stop.

it sure as hell is not okay.

we nearly lost you.

it was amazing he got to me so fast.

as long as you're safe.

can I talk to you for a moment?

how did you get over to me so quickly?

I know what I saw.

and what, exactly, was that.

you stopped the van. you pushed it away.

no one will believe that.

I wasn't planning to tell anyone.

I just want to know the truth.

can't you just thank me and get over it?

you're not going to let it go, are you?

I hope you enjoy disapointment.

why did you even bother?

look! you're moving. you're ALIVE!

actually, I'm glad you're not dead cause - well, that would suck.

you want to go? to prom. with me?

how did you know about that?

you didn't answer my question.

you haven't answered any of mine. you won't even say hello.

it helps if you actually watch where you put your feet.

I know I've been rude, but it's for the best.

it would be better if we weren't friends.

too bad you didn't figure that out earlier.

you think I regret saving you?

she always did know how to worry.

should I know what that means?

la push, baby. you in?

I don't just surf the internet.

you stood up once. on a foam board.

I'll go if you stop saying that.

your mood swings are giving me whiplash.

if you were smart, you'd avoid me.

so let's say, for argument's sake, that I'm not smart. would you talk to me? tell me the truth?

I'd rather hear your theories.

what if I'm not the hero? what if I'm the bad guy.

you're not bad. you can be a jerk, but it's like this... mask. to keep people away.

#twilight rp #rp meme #roleplay meme #ask prompt #sentence starters #ask meme #rp prompts

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hermitslibrary · 1 month ago

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unexpected epithet of artemis: artemis apachomene

ἀπαγχομένη

─── ⋆⋅ ☾⋅⋆ ───

trigger warning for discussions of death by suicide, hanging, and strangulation.

the strangled goddess / she who hangs herself

the description of the origin of this epithet comes from pausinias: (definition) (source)

"some children, the number of whom is not recorded, while playing about the sanctuary [of artemis] found a rope, and tying it round the neck of the image said that artemis was being strangled. the caphyans, detecting what the children had done, stoned them to death. when they had done this, a malady befell their women, whose babies were stillborn, until the pythian priestess bade them bury the children, and sacrifice to them every year as sacrifice is made to heroes, because they had been wrongly put to death. the caphyans still obey this oracle, and call the goddess at condyleae, as they say the oracle also bade them, the strangled lady [apachomene] from that day to this."

i've been pondering the meaning of this myth and epithet. it seems to point to her as a protector of children and their innocence, to understand the importance of play in their lives and to not stifle it in the name of tradition and order. i appreciate this interpretation from sarah iles johnson, in chapter six of restless dead:

“... the children died because, in the perception of the inhabitants, they had been blaspheming artemis. that the children’s behavior was, on the contrary, proper — that is, correct behavior within the local cult of artemis — is indicated by the fact that the oracle not only told the inhabitants to make amends to the ghosts of the children but also told them to worship artemis as apanchomene.”

however, what sarah iles johnston hypothesizes earlier in the same chapter adds a layer of detail:

“i would suggest that this story began as two separate myths, which later became entangled with one another... [as for] the original form of the second story... i would hypothesize that it involved a girl whose tragic suicide, like those of erigone and aspalis, led to widespread disasters, and thereafter to the institution of a cult, in which she was worshipped as 'she who hangs herself.'"

despite a potential sympathy on the part of artemis for the girls, i can't seem to find ways to connect artemis to hanging. helen king, who wrote the chapter "bound to bleed: artemis and greek women", has this to say:

"artemis, who herself has never given birth, can give or withhold a successful labor; here she chooses to prevent birth because the kaphyan women will not call her 'strangled'. why should artemis be 'strangled'? strangulation, for the greeks, meant shedding no blood... normal' greek sacrifices shed blood and so ensured communication between men and gods. as a form of human death, strangulation or hanging evoked horror... but as a means of suicide it can be again related to shedding no blood. to avoid the bloodshed of rape or unwanted defloration a bloodless suicide is appropriate. the chorus in aeschylus's suppliants threaten to hang themselves rather than sleeping with men who they hate... strangulation can therefore be culturally opposed to unwanted sex..."

on one layer, artemis can be seen as a protector of those who have been raped. she granted immortality to women who escaped rape - such as aspalis and britomartis. this epithet could be a nod to her care for rape victims.

edit: appreciate the reblog that pointed out that mythology also has several examples of artemis being unkind to rape victims (callisto being the first that comes to mind). there seems to be a distinction in her sympathies between those who escaped it and those who suffered it. as a rape victim worshipping artemis, i kind of just want to ignore that element as a function of patriarchy and not as one that coincides with the goddess' intentions. however, i do think it would be unfair to just sidestep this element as we are discussing her mythology.

"artemis does not bleed, but she does shed the blood of others, both as a huntress and as protector of the process by which a parthenos [virgin] becomes a gynē [woman]... those in the peri partheniōn [hippocratic writings] are on the contrary 'ready for marriage', ready to bleed and thus to enter the gradual transition which will make them gynaikes (women). the gynē is the opposite pole to the parthenos; she should bleed, in menstruation, defloration and childbirth, as part of her role of reproducing society... but she should not shed blood... pausinias's story reflects artemis as both the goddess who sheds no blood and the goddess who makes others bleed." (helen king, "bound to bleed: artemis and greek women")

in another layer, artemis' function is to control the flow of blood for those who have uteruses, and that's what makes 'the strangled one' - as a reference to blood - a fitting epithet for artemis.

there's a lot of layers to this epithet that i'll be sitting with for a bit. i expected to look into this for a few minutes, and i've been searching this for hours now. i'm fascinated with the layers of meaning, the interpretations, the regional differences.

for another perspective and more information, here's a post about the epithet.

─── ⋆⋅ ☾⋅⋆ ───

#artemis #hellenic polytheism #hellenic polytheist #hellenic worship #helpol #hermits-notes #hermits-thoughts #tw strangulation #tw suic1de #tw rap3

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bonesxbows · 1 year ago

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Surgery of a Hope (Astarion x Reader)

My Masterlist

Someone dared to try to lay a hand on you and Astarion finds out. He leaves Gale to comfort you while he goes and "takes care" of it. Or alternatively, Astarion is trying to show you he loves you in one of the only ways he knows how; by killing.

(WARNINGS) - mentions of sexual assault/assault (depending on how you look at it), but does not go into a lot of detail - crying/breakdown - trauma responses

If you have any triggers relating to assault or past assault please be careful reading this. I have not personally experienced what is written here but it is loosely based on trauma of my own and the goal was to write something to act as a comfort for myself and whoever else needs to read something like this. But please tread carefully, I didn't write this with the intent of triggering anyone.

Otherwise, I hope you enjoy and I hope reading this can help someone else like writing it helped me :) Comments and reblogs are much appreciated!

Banners by @strangergraphics

You sat on the ground inside your tent, nestled in the corner of the fabric, your knees pulled up to your chest. You were slowly rocking back and forth, replaying the traumatic events of the day in your head. Your body was present, but your mind was lost in its own little world, your eyes glassed over. You didn't notice Astarion barge into your tent, a bubble of excitement coming with him.

“Darling! I've been waiting all day to have a moment with you all to myself. I-” His sentence and his body stopped dead in their tracks when his eyes finally found you, a sad little ball of limbs shoved into the corner. His voice startled you out of your daze. He walked closer towards you and reached out a hand, but you jumped in response to him approaching and shuffled yourself deeper into the corner, as far away from him as you possibly could get. He frowned. He recognized your fear, he remembered acting like you were doing now once before and that worried him.

“Astarion, wait. I…wait. Please, don't come any closer.” You spilled out your words quickly. Your eyes were glued to his outstretched hand, wide like a gnoll staring down a wall of fire, and tears started to pool underneath them.

“What’s wrong my love?” He hated when you cried. He was getting better at learning how to comfort you but he still got nervous about making it worse. His frown deepened but he respected your request and instead knelt down where he was, keeping his distance from you.

“I…um…” you stumbled over your words, your mouth becoming dry and thick, like someone had shoved cotton down your throat. You tried to blink away the tears but they were now two hot waterfalls running down your face.

“It’s alright, you can tell me. What happened?” You looked like a scared animal and it reminded him too much of how he used to feel. He was concerned, but he was also angry. He had a feeling he already knew what had happened to you and the thought of him being right made him burn with rage inside. You took a shaky breath and did your best to speak coherently.

“Someone…um, someone tried to touch me earlier when we were in town. I…I tried to stop them, tried to fight them off. Some things were said and…and…” Your story ended there as the sobs racked your body aggressively. You buried your head in your arms, wrapping your hands around your shoulder to try to comfort yourself as you rocked back and forth, crying and screaming and sobbing loudly. Astarion swore he could feel his undead heart shatter. He could do nothing but sit there and watch as you poured out your emotions. He knew from experience that if he tried to comfort you it would only make the situation worse, but he felt helpless just sitting there and doing nothing. So he reached over and yanked your blanket off of your cot, folding it up haphazardly and placing it between the two of you, nudging your foot with the fabric, doing his best not to touch you.

You poked your head up slightly, eyeing him. You saw the blanket, your blanket, and how Astarion sat back on his heels, a comforting smile on his face. You unfurled a hand from your cocoon of limbs and reached forward slowly, grabbing the blanket tentatively, as if even the soft material would snap back at you as well. But it didn't, so you pulled it into your lap on top of your knees and buried your head into the comfort of it, sniffing the familiar scent of Astarion’s cologne that had rubbed off on it from his constant nights spent in your tent with you. You used a corner of it to wipe away your tears and tried to focus on steadying your breathing. You mouthed a ‘thank you’ to Astarion and he nodded his head.

“Do you think you can manage to remember who it was, my love? Can you tell me what they looked like?” he asked you softly. He wanted to reach out and grab your hand in his, but he stayed still for now. He would not touch you until you were ready and asked him to, no matter how much he wanted to. You began to shake your head furiously.

“No. Astarion, no. It was nothing, really. You don't need to do anything. It was my fault anywa-” He cut you off before you could finish your sentence.

“Do not even finish that statement darling. None of this is your fault. None of it. Do you understand? Now, what did they look like?” his face was like stone, serious and deadly. It didn't scare you, not anymore at least, but you knew trying to argue with him at this point was futile. You were so confused and upset you did not know what the right thing to do was so you trusted Astarion and told him everything you could remember. You watched as he took off his jacket and moved closer to you. But he stopped just before he got too close.

“Is it alright if I touch you my sweet?” He asked before he did anything and you nodded, although slowly. He leaned forward to drape his jacket over your shoulders and pull it up over your neck. Your fingers fumbled at first but you grabbed it and pulled it as close to your skin as you could, relishing in the warmth and comfort radiating off of the velvet fabric.

“Stay here, alright? I’ll tell Gale to accompany you here inside of your tent so you don't have to be alone. I promise I’ll be back before morning.” He leaned forward again to kiss you gently on your forehead and you didn't jerk away this time. He smiled warmly at you but his ruby eyes shone with anger and malice. He began to stand up and head for the entry flap of your tent.

“Wait! Where are you going?” You jumped from surprise and began to reach for him but stopped abruptly when his jacket began to fall off of your shoulders and instead quickly grabbed it again and pulled it back up around you. You were afraid to be alone, even with Gale. You only felt safe around Astarion. Your sense of security was so shattered you were hesitant to trust anyone except him. He turned back around before he left.

“Promise me you'll stay here with Gale.” no, you wanted to go with him, wherever he was going. You wanted his warmth and to be in his arms with him by your side protecting you, no one else.

“But I-” he cut you off again. He was not looking for any arguments tonight.

“Promise me, my love.” there was no arguing with the look in his eyes and there was no changing his mind about whatever he had set his mind on doing. “I promise.” you choked out, trying not to cry again at the thought of him leaving you right now.

“Good. I’ll be back as soon as I can alright? Then I’ll stay with you for as long as you need.” You watched him leave, trying to blink away the tears that threatened to flow. You gripped his jacket even tighter and breathed in the smell of his cologne again, it was an even stronger scent on his jacket than on your blanket. A few moments after Astarion left Gale walked in, smiling sympathetically. He somehow juggled a bowl, two mugs, and a stack of books in his hands without dropping anything.

“How are you feeling?” he asked. You didn't give an answer and watched as he sat where Astarion once was just a minute ago and placed all of the things in his hands in front of him, between the two of you.

“We don't have to talk if you'd rather not. But I thought you might like a distraction while Astarion is away. My time is yours.” You looked at him and he looked sincere, but you were still a little wary. But this was Gale, someone who had stuck by your side from the very beginning and had been nothing but respectful and helpful ever since. You gazed over what he had brought with him, there was what appeared to be stew in the bowl and the two mugs were filled with tea and still steaming. The books were ones you recognized, titles you had once borrowed from him and had told him you had enjoyed immensely. Books that you knew, that were familiar, and there was comfort in familiarity. He knew this. Gale was your best friend, he was the second person to know just about everything about you. You were grateful that his memory was impeccable and that he had remembered all of your favorite things, especially at a time like now.

“What kind of soup is that?” you asked. The tears had subsided, for now. He was glad you were up to talking, it was going to be a long night for him if he had to sit here in silence the whole time.

“Vegetable and sausage. And that’s peppermint tea, with sugar, just how you like it. I've also brought your favorite books, but I can fetch something else if reading isn't up to your liking currently.” He stole a pillow from the pile off of your bed and propped himself up against the side of your tent, still an agreeable distance away from you. Astarion must have given him the details of your jumpiness and sensitivity to touch right now. You couldn't help but smile just a little.

“The books are alright for now, Gale. Thank you.” You reached forward for one of the mugs and chose one of the books from the stack as you did so.

“Of course. Let me know if you need anything else, alright? Im not going anywhere until Astarion gets back.” you nodded and took a sip from the mug, the tea warming your scratchy throat on the way down. You opened the book to the first page and Gale did the same with his own book.

Eventually the warm tea, familiar story, and comfort of Astarion’s scent lulled you into a sleep. Your body was exhausted from the day’s events and the extensive crying you had done earlier. Gale had stayed with you the entire night, within arms reach just in case you needed him, even when the rough ground began to irritate his old human body. He had even lit the candles in your tent after the sun had set just so you would not be in complete darkness if you woke up in the middle of the night.

You were never a heavy sleeper, but now you were even more anxious in your sleep after what had happened. A dull thud had woken you up and you heard the sound of water splashing. Your eyes fluttered open quickly but your heart calmed down when you saw the back of a familiar white shirt and white curls in the candlelight. Astarion had returned at some point, before morning just like he had promised, but his back was turned to you and he was knelt in front of your washing bucket.

“Astarion? Is that you?” you asked groggily. Your voice was thick with sleep but you were wide awake, grateful that he was back already.

“Go back to sleep darling, it’s alright.” he spoke sweetly to you like always, but he stayed with his back to you, working something onto the wash board inside the tub.

“Where have you been?” you sat up, blinking away the remaining sleep in your eyes and trying to focus on what he was doing. A part of you already had a guess of where he had been for the last few hours but you asked anyway, not wanting to believe what you knew was already true.

“No where you need to worry your pretty little head about, everything’s alright.” he told you, but you were too curious now to go back to sleep. Astarion hated chores, yet here he was scrubbing laundry in the middle of the night. You stood up quietly and padded over to him, still holding onto his jacket around your shoulders. You leaned over his shoulder and observed. He was holding on to a different white shirt than the one on his back currently, scrubbing furiously as the soapy water turned pink. Now that you were closer you also noticed the way the candlelight shined against black spots in his hair, a stark difference against his bleach white curls. You frowned slightly, accepting your previous conclusion as the truth now.

“Is that blood?” you asked. You already knew the answer but you wanted to hear it from him.

“No.” he tried to deny the obvious, though he already knew you wouldn't believe the white lie.

“Astarion.” you said sternly, gently warning him to tell you the truth this time.

“Alright maybe it is. But the bastard deserved it.” he stopped scrubbing and so you sat down on the ground behind him. He turned to look at you, abandoning the shirt in the dirty water.

“What did you do?” your voice was calm. You didn't mind he had taken matters into his own hands, in fact you were secretly grateful.

“I taught him a much needed lesson my love. He won’t be hurting anyone ever again.” his lips turned up into his signature killer smile. He was proud of himself for the kill, as per usual. You wanted to thank him, say something, anything, to convey how relieved you felt, but the words got caught in your throat. His smile faltered a little when he noticed the pool of tears forming in your eyes, but he knew you were okay from the small smile that was stuck on your face.

He dunked his hands back into the water to wash the rest of the blood off and then dried them on his pants before outstretching a hand to you, silently asking for yours. You obliged, placing your hand in his. He brought it up to his face and placed a gentle kiss on your knuckle. You couldn't help the small laugh that bubbled up from his gesture, the smile on your face growing despite the tears that started to flood your face. You were safe. Even after all that had happened, you were safe with Astarion.

#my writings #astarion x reader #baldurs gate astarion #astarion #bg3 astarion #astarion x tav #bg3 #bg3 fanfiction

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infoglitch · 11 months ago

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I think the reason I connect to Jaune of all characters is because I can relate to the feeling of inadequacy. Ofcourse the character isn't perfect and I get why people just don't like him but I can't agree. Ofcourse that's just a shitty opinion and of course obviously my opinions are garbage. Any way my glazing aside-

Ok I know normally this is a really small (even compared to the shitposts) Rwby shipping post buuut-

A chat

Setting: jaune is currently helping Weiss move into her temporary apartment.

Jaune: hey Weiss?

Weiss turned to look at jaune as she hummed. She held a box in her hands before setting it down a stack of boxes.

Weiss: hmm?

Jaune: if you were sent back in time and put in our beacon, would you still.. you know dislike me during that time?

Weiss: well depends, would it just be me or would all of us be sent back?

Jaune: just you.

Weiss: hmm.. well id certainly still be annoyed with you. But I wouldnt be.. as harsh as my younger self. I would tell you to stop flirting and just try being friendly with me and then see how that goes.

Jaune: huh.. alright then. anything else outside of me?

Weiss: well this ones obvious, tell pyrrha to ask you out. Atleast then I wouldn't be annoyed. And apologize to Blake profusely for a lot of the things I said.. and ofcourse make sure to check in on ruby.

The room went quiet as jaune simply nodded.

Jaune: so-

Weiss: jaune, since you did ask that I think It's only fair that I ask you a question.

Jaune: huh, that seems fair. Fire away.

Weiss turned around fully to face him.

Weiss: if you went back in time.. what would you do?

Jaune: let's see, I would try harder in my classes, I'd have enough with Cardin's bullshit a lot earlier.. and I'd be honest with my team and you guys.. outside of that I'd stop flirting with you.. I got a lot of things I wish I could fix.

Weiss: but obviously.. what's happened, has happened.

Jaune: no going back.

Weiss: speaking of no going back, since we've finished up for today I say we go visit Ruby.

Jaune: alright then, you sure I should come with? It's.. been awhile since me and her actually talked.

Weiss: I think it do you both good.

Jaune just simply nodded as he amd Weiss soon walked out the front door but not before-

Jaune: hey Weiss.. thanks for putting up with me

Weiss: your welcome.. and your not that annoying anymore. Besides, outside of that, your a good friend.

END

When I check to see the reblogs I better see "WE ARE SO BACK" (kidding obviously I'm not that good at writing fics)

..you mothafuckers-

#rwby #jaune arc #rwby shitpost #jaune x weiss #white knight #whiteknight #rwby whiteknight #rwby white knight #weiss schnee #jaune arc x weiss schnee #weiss x jaune #TOO MANY FUCKING TAGS.

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whatthetumblfck · 2 years ago

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I Was Born Ready

Summary: You're kidnapped on a mission gone wrong and it only gets worse. You eventually escape, but will Bucky and the team see you the same way?

Word Count: 6517

Warnings: swearing, some injuries, angst, whump

Content: Bucky x reader, Y/N, Avengers, whump, kidnapping. All of my fics are self-indulgent.

Please don't claim my work as your own, but feel free to reblog.

You wiped the sweat from your brow. As far as you could tell, it had been 5, maybe 6, days since you were taken. You knew what HYDRA were doing. They were trying to break you. You adjusted your legs and shifted your weight in the dark, cramped space. For the last several hours, you had been locked in some sort of box, just big enough to crouch or sit with crossed legs. It was hot as hell and you’d been sweating profusely, wondering how much longer you would last before passing out from dehydration or dying from heat stroke. But you tried not to worry about it. They will come for you soon. He will come for you. You just need to hang on a little while longer.

A few more hours had passed, and the heat was suffocating. What little strength you had left was dwindling. You rested your head against the wall of the enclosure and closed your eyes, fighting the nauseating dizziness that threatened to overcome you. The rattling of chains caught your attention. It seemed like the sound was getting closer. It was then you realized you had drifted- asleep? Unconscious? You weren’t sure, but you fought like hell to focus your attention on what was happening right outside your tiny prison. Suddenly, there was a sharp creak of metal and cool light flooded the box. You squinted your eyes, desperate to see what was going on.

“Get up!” a harsh voice demanded.

Your body shook as you tried to stand, but it was no use. You were too weak and dehydrated.

“GET UP!” they shouted angrily, as if that would provide the strength needed to undo the last several hours of torture.

Instead, your body gave up completely and you slumped inside the box. The next thing you registered was the sensation of a cool breeze on your face and the tops of your feet scraping along concrete as they dragged you by your arms back to your cell.

ONE WEEK EARLIER

“The fuck you mean it’s abandoned?” you whispered.

“I mean, I’m not picking up any heat signatures inside the building,” Sam clarified, adjusting Redwing’s controls just to be sure.

Bucky lowered his chin, smiling to himself. He knew you were always looking forward to a fight.

“All right, until we clear it, we’re going to proceed with caution,” Steve began, “Y/N and Bucky, you’re going to enter the south side of the building. Sam and I will cover the north entrance. Position Redwing on the east to detect movement from the access road. Once it’s clear, we set the charges and evacuate.”

You stole a sideways glance at Bucky and tried to hide your excited smile. You loved working with Bucky; you consider him to be your best friend. You felt like there might even be more there too. But you never pushed him. If being friends was all he wanted, then you would be happy with that. Bucky was mostly quiet and reserved, but sometimes he would open up to you, tell you about his life before the war. Sometimes, but very rarely, he would reveal the horrors HYDRA inflicted upon him. You couldn’t respond; only listen in sickened contempt. Your hatred for them became personal because of what they put him through, but you also began to piece together how they operate, their torture methods, and their twisted thought processes. You filed away this information little by little, to use against them and one day, take them down. It became your personal mission, why you were so eager to take on HYDRA related missions, and so disappointed when they turned out to be flops.

Your thoughts were interrupted by an elbow gently nudging your arm. “You ready?” Bucky said as your eyes met his.

“I was born ready,” you replied, smugly.

Bucky smiled at your enthusiasm, but it didn’t reach his eyes. He was tired of fighting, but he’d be lying if he said he didn’t want to watch HYDRA burn to the ground. Having you fight beside him, though, was a double-edged sword. He enjoyed your company more than he let on, but he also worried for your safety. He always asked Steve to pair you two together as much as possible on missions (so he could keep an eye on you), and he always received a knowing look in return. You were one of the best fighters Bucky had ever seen, but you could also be impulsive. Most of the time, you managed to compensate for this flaw and come out on top in the fight, but there have been quite a few close calls. Too close for Bucky’s comfort, even if you insisted you had everything under control.

“After you then,” Bucky said, gesturing to the south entrance.

“Such a gentleman,” you flirted, even though your tone was a bit condescending. You didn’t miss the fact that Bucky liked to keep an eye on you. It was obvious, the way he stuck by your side for every mission. It was sweet, but completely unnecessary.

Entering the building was uneventful. As you looked around, you took note of all the dust and debris, the result of what must have been years of no use. Maybe Sam was right, it must be abandoned. What a waste of time. You continued your sweep, clearing each derelict room.

“Second and third floors are clear,” Sam’s voice sounded in your comm.

“Well, aren’t you an over-achiever?” you responded mockingly.

“Y/N, Buck. What’s your status?” Steve asked, attempting to maintain professionalism on the mission. Captain Steve didn’t know how to have fun. Killjoy.

“First floor is clear, heading to the basement now,” Bucky reported, shooting you a ‘behave yourself’ look. You stuck your tongue out at him and ran for the stairwell.

“Y/N, wait!”

“Come on! There’s nothing here. Let’s clear this moldy-ass basement so we can blow it up and get home. I’m starving!” you announced.

Bucky caught up with you and roughly grabbed your elbow to pull you back.

“We need to be careful. This is HYDRA we’re dealing with. You need to take this seriously.”

You ripped your arm from his grasp, offended he would be so rough with you. “This isn’t HYDRA. This isn’t anything. There’s literally nothing here.”

Bucky schooled his expression. He didn’t want to be angry with you, but your recklessness could put everyone in danger. He let out a frustrated sigh, putting his hands on your shoulders and lowering his head to look into your eyes.

“Will you please be more careful? For me?”

You were momentarily stunned by the soft cadence of his voice. But quickly regathered your thoughts.

“Bucky, I am being careful. You need to lighten up.” You shrugged out of his grasp and turned back to the stairwell.

What is with everyone today? The super-soldiers are being super-serious. Even Sam seems like a stick in the mud, definitely not his usual, talkative self. Did you do something to offend them? You thought about the events of the last few days and couldn’t think of anything out of the ordinary. Definitely nothing that would explain what everyone’s problem is.

You glanced over your shoulder to see Bucky a few paces behind you as you descended the last of the stairs and reached the basement.

“Well, I didn’t think it was possible, but this looks even more abandoned than the first floor,” you said giving Bucky a pointed look.

“Just keep your eyes open for anything suspicious.” Bucky gently brushed past you to take the lead, advancing down the corridor. He had an uneasy feeling he just couldn’t shake.

“Suspicious?” you remarked sarcastically. “This whole mission is suspicious. What are we fighting here? The cobwebs? The ridiculous amount of dust?” You pushed past Bucky to take the lead again, but when you glanced back, you realized he had stopped. He was looking at you with wide eyes; his expression, one you didn’t recognize.

“What? What is it?” you asked, concern growing in the pit of your stomach.

“You’re right. Nothing about this is right. There’s too much dust. Our source indicated there was activity here less than a year ago. It shouldn’t look like this.”

You looked around nervously. “Maybe the source was wrong.”

“Not likely…”

Unexpected static in the comms made you jump. You could hear Steve’s voice, but it kept breaking up and you couldn’t understand what he was saying until you made something out very clearly that made your blood run cold.

Pull back……’s a trap…--t out…ABORT!

Your eyes locked with Bucky’s. You froze. He was standing about 10 feet from you when you both registered a rapid clicking noise, like a sped-up clock.

“RUN!!” You heard him yell just before the explosion.

The wall behind you erupted, sending you several yards through the air until you collided with the ground. You could feel the heat and unbearable pressure on your back as you lay prone in the ruins. Dust swirled around you. After several moments of trying to remember how to breathe again and process what the hell had just happened, you remembered that Bucky was with you. You glanced over in his direction, but all you could see was a literal wall of rubble, fire, and smoke. You struggled to focus your eyes, blinking rapidly to clear the tears that were forming. Damn, that hurt.

Distantly, you could hear someone calling your name.

“Buck--,” your voice was cut off by a coughing fit as the dust invaded your lungs. “Bucky…” you tried again.

“Y/N?” he sounded closer. You could hear movement, crumbling concrete. “Are you hurt?”

It was at this point, you realized you should probably take a moment to figure out the damage.

“Y/N??” his voice sounded more concerned, more urgent. You weren’t sure how long you had taken to respond.

“Uhh…I….I think I’m okay……I can’t move. I think…ahh…there’s something on my back,” you choked out.

“You’re gonna be okay. We’re coming to get you. Just..hang on, okay? Hang on.”

Hearing this made you relax. Getting blown up was exhausting. You were certain you were going to hear about this later. About how you should have listened to Bucky, been more careful, taken the mission more seriously. You closed your eyes, trying to reserve your strength. You would need it to climb out of this burning hole in the ground.

After a few minutes, you felt the pressure on your back lessen. That was fast. You opened your eyes and tried to focus on Bucky’s face, but then you heard his voice from behind the burning wall of concrete. Confused, you concentrated your attention on the blurry figure standing before you. HYDRA. You gathered all your strength, trying to fight, but you couldn’t get a single hit in before a blow to your face rendered you unconscious.

Bucky heard footsteps and scraping rocks on the other side of the barrier. He had finally managed to make a dent in the rubble just large enough to see through. To see you being dragged away by HYDRA.

“NOOOO!” Bucky frantically slammed his metal fist into the rubble, trying to break through, but it was no use. He couldn’t get to you in time. He watched as you disappeared into the dust and smoke.

You were freezing. Another week had passed, maybe two. You weren’t sure. It was the same thing. Over and over. Freezing to the point you couldn’t move or think. Then they would throw you in the box again until you passed out from the heat. You didn’t even know what they wanted. They didn’t ask you anything, barely said three words to you. Wouldn’t answer any of your questions. How the hell did they expect to get information out of you if they didn’t fucking ask you anything? Idiots. You’d be glad to give them as much false information as you could muster.

You were frustrated. Frustrated with this pointless torture and frustrated that no one had broken you out of this shithole yet. What was taking so long?

The next day was new. This time a man in a lab coat came into your cell. Based on the history of everything you have come to know about HYDRA, the lab coat is not a good sign. He peered down at you where you sat against the cold, concrete wall.

“She’s ready,” he practically drooled with excitement. Disgusting.

Two oversized goons entered your cell and brought you to your feet as another ganglier looking goon wheeled in a stretcher. Your stomach dropped. Not good. This is not good. You tried not to let anxiety and fear get the best of you. You’ve endured the heat, the cold, the physical pain and the repulsive goop they fed you, but this was new, and you had no idea what they had planned.

“No. No no no. What are you doing?” You kicked and fought weakly as they strapped you down. You were unable to move.

Lab coat leaned in close to your face. You could smell the wicked stench rolling out of his mouth.

He simply answered, “Phase two.”

……..

“What do you want? You’ve been torturing me for weeks and haven’t asked me a damn thing! Do you even know how this works? No? Must have missed that day in torture 101.”

The lab coat stopped what he was doing and turned to face you. Amusement and almost pity plastered on his face.

“My dear. I haven’t been torturing you. I’ve been preparing you.”

…………

The first injection must have been a sedative and, for that, you were thankful. Your vision became blurry and all your muscles relaxed at once. You could’ve almost fallen asleep. Until the second injection. At first, it was cold, like ice running through your veins. Starting in your arm and flowing through your chest before settling in the rest of your limbs. It was enough to make you shiver and shake uncontrollably. With the last injection came the unbearable heat. It spread through you like wildfire, burning through the sedative and blistering your nerves. It coursed through your body, the agonizing flames filling your skull, threatening to split it open. It was too much. Unbearable. You thrashed your arms and legs beneath the restraints, screaming until you went hoarse. Nothing you did relieved the pain, the burning. You were left alone in your misery, knowing nothing but the searing pain in your head, threatening to end your life. You hoped it would.

Then, it stopped. You thought maybe death had finally taken you and you felt sadness, for Bucky. For the team. But you were back in your cell. This couldn’t be death. Death isn’t this cruel.

You rolled on your side and slowly sat upright, fighting off the dizziness. You felt horrible, like you should be dead, but at least the pain had subsided. You experimentally staggered to the door of your cell and peered through the slot. It was eerily silent. Still, you waited to see if anyone approached. They almost always did when you awoke to send you for another round of torture…or wait. What did he say? They were preparing you..for what? The injections, ice and fire, the pain, all came flooding back to you. What did they do? Your breaths came faster. You had to get out of there. Fear and panic were in control now. You pushed and pulled at the door feverishly, and to your surprise, the door opened. Worried this was another trap, you stepped back, but no one came. What the fuck?

You left your cell and made your way down the hallway, searching for the exit or at the very least, a weapon. The building was completely cleaned out. They left you there, their experiment. Did they think you were dead? Or just a failure? You didn’t feel any different. Those HYDRA morons must have been bigger fucking idiots than you gave them credit for. Still, you weren’t going to stick around. When you finally made it out of the building, you realized you actually recognized the area. You weren’t that far from the compound. It made you sick to think you were only 10 or so miles from home this whole time, and still, they couldn’t find you. HYDRA could have practically walked up and rang the front doorbell, and the team would have had no idea.

It was cold outside and you were dressed only in a thin gown. You walked for hours, determined to make it home. You had no way of contacting anyone. You were surrounded by a few trees and fields of nothing. The final yards leading up to the compound were grueling. You were exhausted. Your feet bled and your legs shook with the effort.

It was early evening, you guessed, when you painfully stumbled into the common room, where Steve, Bucky and Sam all sat, attention focused on various maps and blueprints laid out before them. Steve saw you first, eyes staring and mouth hanging open. It would have been humorous had you not just been through hell and back. Bucky stopped mid-sentence when he noticed Steve’s expression and turned his head to see what Steve was staring at.

“Y/N??” Bucky couldn’t believe it. His eyes ran over your battered form, watching your whole body shake with fatigue.

You didn’t know what to say. You tried to choke back the tears that were now streaming down your face.

But this was all you could handle. You were suddenly dizzy, the room had started to spin and you dropped to your knees as Bucky ran towards you.

“Oh God! Call Dr. Cho!” Bucky ordered, but Sam was already on it.

You collapsed into Bucky’s arms and saw Steve running toward you. Bucky’s alarmed face was the last thing you saw before your eyes involuntarily closed.

When you awoke the next day, you were alone in the med bay. You sat up and rubbed your eyes, trying to force out the lingering headache. You swung your legs over the side of the bed and were about to remove your IV when Bucky walked into your room.

“Hey, you’re awake,” he said as he approached you cautiously. “How are you feeling?”

“Um..really..hungover,” you cracked a smile trying to break the tension. “How long was I out?”

Bucky looked at his watch before responding, “About 23 hours.”

“Oh shit. New record.”

Bucky looked nervous. “We looked everywhere..”

“Not everywhere,” you retorted, sounding more bitter than you intended.

“I didn’t think I was going to see you again.”

“Well…that makes two of us.” Your eyes stayed trained on the floor. You couldn’t bring yourself to look at him. You spent weeks dreaming about seeing him again, and now you couldn’t even look at him. Why? Were you that angry that they couldn’t find you? They were obviously looking.

Bucky sensed that maybe this wasn’t the best time to broach the subject, so he changed it.

“So..uh…they want to do a debriefing on what happened as soon as you’re feeling well enough.”

You faltered. You didn’t want to talk about it, relive it. Especially so soon. But you’d rather get it over with so you can move on with your life. Put the whole ordeal behind you.

You looked down at the IV in your arm before ripping it out, the blood beginning to trickle down to your palm.

“Doll—what are you doing?” Bucky lunged toward you, grabbing gauze off the bedside table to apply pressure to the site.

You grabbed the gauze and took over applying pressure.

“I’m about to change my clothes,” you began glancing around the room before finding some in a bag below the bed, “so unless you want to see me naked, you can turn around.”

Bucky paused, mouth opening slightly before regaining his composure and turning to face away from you. You caught him off guard, which is honestly, something you’ve never seen happen.

You were a little disappointed. Maybe you’d been reading him wrong, and he doesn’t see you that way. Or maybe he’s just being a gentleman. This isn’t exactly the best time to explore your feelings for one another. Still, it stung.

………………………..

You sat at the table, nervously glancing at all the faces in the room. Fury, Tony, Steve, and Sam all had their eyes on you. Everyone except Bucky. He stood in the corner, holding his gaze to the floor. He looked more nervous than you felt. Weird.

They asked their usual questions, and you answered as best you could. But you didn’t feel comfortable enough to go into extensive detail. You trusted these men with your life, but it was starting to feel less like a debriefing and more like an interrogation.

“…and you’re sure that’s all you remember?” Fury asked again.

You looked around the room again, each set of eyes seeming frustrated. Expecting more information than what you’ve provided for the last 2 hours. This was exhausting. A familiar headache was building behind your eyes, and you were beyond done with this.

When you didn’t answer right away, Tony asked another question. “They just let you walk away?” You could hear the blatant skepticism.

“I don’t know what you want me to say.” Tears were starting to fill your eyes. Damnit! This is not how you thought this would go, but you were feeling pressured, overwhelmed. “They tortured me! For weeks! The same damn thing. Over and over and over again! And I don’t know---maybe they thought I was DEAD!” You choked on a sob; tears streaming down your face now.

“Okay! That’s enough!” Bucky interjected, seemingly ending the questioning.

You quickly stood from your seat and rushed out of the room.

They all exchanged glances and Bucky lingered there silently for a moment before following you.

When he reached your room in the compound, he knocked, but you didn’t answer.

“Doll. It’s me. Can I come in?”

Again, you didn’t answer. He could hear your quiet cries. He tried the handle, but you had locked the door.

“Can you unlock the door, please?”

“Go away, Bucky,” you said, softly. You didn’t need to yell. You knew he could hear you.

“Come on. I just want to make sure you’re okay.” With that, he could hear you moving towards the door.

You angrily flung the door open, surprising Bucky and forcing him to take a step back. Your hair was disheveled, eyes red and still wet with tears.

“Do I look fucking okay to you!?!?” Bucky looked into your eyes, not knowing what to say.

“HYDRA imprisoned me, practically in our own fucking backyard and still no one came for me!”

“Y/N, I swear to you, we never stopped looking—”

“And as soon as I fight my way back here, you all grill me for information, like it was my fucking idea to get captured?”

“Doll, no one thinks this was—”

“I waited for—aagh—” the pain in your head suddenly flared. You squeezed your eyes shut and pinched the skin between them. Your discomfort was evident.

“Hey, hey. What is it? What’s wrong?” Bucky’s worried eyes searched your face for answers.

You tried to recover, to push the pain aside.

“I waited for you—AAGH” the pain peaked. The same blistering heat threatening to end you, keeled you over.

With your shaking hands on your knees, you could feel Bucky move to your side. His arms wrapped around your waist to support you.

“Doll, what’s going on? Answer me. Please!”

But you couldn’t answer him. You were back on that stretcher. A prisoner, again. All you knew was the burning pain. Maybe this time, it would spare you the torment and claim your life.

“SOMEBODY HELP! I NEED HELP!” Bucky’s voice sounded far away.

The fire swirled in your skull and bile burned the back of your throat. You lurched forward, fell to your knees, and vomited on the floor. Everything was suddenly black, then nothing.

You awoke once more, alone, in the med bay. Well, not completely alone. You could hear talking, whispers. Just outside your door.

There’s something she’s not telling me. But I’m not going to try to force answers out of her. She’ll come to me when she’s ready. I’m just going to be her friend. That’s what she really needs right now.

Just a friend? You felt the blanket of disappointment weigh on you again. You were pulled from your thoughts when Bucky opened the door.

You kept your eyes on him as he carefully entered the room.

“Who were you talking to?”

“Huh?”

“Who were you talking to just now?” You tried not to sound like you were accusing him, but you didn’t like being talked about behind your back.

“I wasn’t talking to anyone,” Bucky shook his head, seeming to be genuinely confused.

Great. Now Bucky was lying to you. Some friend he’s trying to be. Even with him literally by your side, you were suddenly feeling very alone. No one trusted you. They think you’re hiding something. Truth be told, you are hiding something. You never told them about the injections, how the torture was actually “preparations”. You even left out the creepy lab guy coat because you were afraid. Afraid if they found out what really happened, that you were an experiment, they wouldn’t look at you the same way. You were afraid you would lose their hard-earned respect, your place on the team. You couldn’t risk it.

“So what happened?” he asked.

“What do you mean?”

“The pain? Passing out?” Bucky pressed, becoming serious. This felt like an interrogation again.

“Oh…it was just a headache,” you offered. Were you honestly expecting them not to ask?

“That’s bullshit. What happened to you? What did they do?” He seemed desperate and angry and you were becoming more and more guarded.

“I thought you weren’t going to force answers out of me.” You threw his words back in his face.

“What?”

“Nothing”

“What did you say just now?”

You were out of patience and just wanted to be alone. “Nothing. Please leave.”

Bucky stared at you, disbelieving, before turning his back on you and walking out the door.

A single tear slipped down your cheek. What the hell happened? Everything was fine. You were on a mission, business as usual, and then you were captured and tortured. You miraculously make it back home and suddenly, everyone is against you? You didn’t do anything wrong. Why is everyone acting like you’re at fault? Your thoughts are becoming louder in your head, circling frantically and building tension. You clench your teeth, trying to hold in a scream, but you can feel an energy building inside you. You pull your knees to your chest, struggling to contain it. Your clenched fists pound at your temples. You don’t know what’s happening; you feel out of control, about to spill over. Explode.

Suddenly, you lose control, letting out an ear-piercing scream, releasing a force you had never felt before. All at once, glass bottles and cabinets shatter, the reinforced windows in your room crack. Furniture is thrown chaotically. Everything is broken, in a frightening disarray, and you’re left sitting in the ruins of what once felt like a safe place.

You tried to catch your breath, eyes darting around the room, attempting to make sense of what just happened.

Oh, God. Oh, God. What did HYDRA do to you? What have you done? You needed to get out of there. Now. You jump to your feet, grab your clothes, and run. You shove past S.H.I.E.L.D. employees in the hallways, their thoughts intruding and overlapping with your own. It took you a moment to realize what it was, what you were doing: unintentionally hearing their thoughts. You have to get away, get out. It’s too loud. You’re still running when you hear more familiar voices, but these aren’t in your head.

You can hear Bucky, Steve and Sam talking about what they found at the base where you were kept. Empty syringes. Medical equipment. Partially encrypted files describing some kind of experiment. They know—how could they not? Have they known this whole time?

“I don’t know what they did to her. She won’t tell me, but…she’s different.” Bucky spoke quietly.

Different? Is that how he saw you now? Is that why he’d been acting so strangely since you got back?

“Look man,” Sam reasoned, “she’s been through a lot. It would be weird if she wasn’t acting differently.”

“Still, if they did do whatever this experiment is on her, we don’t know what the outcome is…If she’s still herself, or even on our side,” Steve added.

Your heart dropped. You already felt like they didn’t trust you, which was bad enough, but now they’re against you? You waited for Bucky to defend you. He knows you better than anyone, but his silence spoke volumes. You thought Bucky, of all people, would understand what you’d been through. That you would never turn on them. You really were all alone in this. You felt the fear and uncertainty pouring out of the room.

Then, an unfamiliar voice on the intercom startled you.

Code Gray- Med Room 4. Code Gray- Med Room 4.

Shit. That was your room. Then the alarm started blaring and you ran. When did you become the enemy? How did this happen? You’re not part of HYDRA. You’re the victim. You managed to get out of the compound without anyone else seeing you. But you had no idea where to go from there.

Bucky, Steve, and Sam rushed to your med room. They stood there in disbelief, taking in the scene. It looks like a bomb went off.

“What the hell happened?” Sam asked.

“We’re not sure, sir. We, uh, heard a scream and when we got here, the room was empty,” a nurse answered.

“Where is she?” Bucky asked, growing impatient.

“We don’t know, I’m sorry,” the nurse responded before quicky leaving the room.

Steve and Sam exchanged looks. Bucky ran his fingers through his hair.

“Buck….”

“No.”

“We need to consider all the facts, here.”

“No, Steve! She wouldn’t do this. She’s not HYDRA.”

“Dude, she was missing for weeks and then just waltzed through the front door? That doesn’t seem odd to you?” Sam added.

“She didn’t waltz, Sam. She could barely walk, then she collapsed,” Bucky defended.

“So you think they just let her go? When the hell has HYDRA ever just let anybody go?”

“I don’t know.”

“Her story isn’t adding up, Buck.”

“They did something to her, she’s different. I just don’t know why she’d hiding it.”

“What do you mean? What aren’t you telling us?” Steve questioned.

“I think….whatever they did to her, worked. I thought it was a coincidence, at first, but then…this,” he motioned around the room. “I think she could hear what I was thinking earlier, and I think this is part of whatever she’s going through. I think she’s enhanced.”

They all looked around the room, letting Bucky’s theory sink it.

Steve broke the silence. “We need to find her before she hurts someone.”

You were walking against the cold wind and found yourself back at the shithole. You weren’t sure what you were doing there. Looking for answers, maybe? Waiting for them to find you? Like they were supposed to do. Before the injections, before they turned on you, before you lost control. What did they think of you now? You’re certain they must think you’re HYDRA. Fear and despair surged through you, and you started to lose control again. Objects that surrounded you started to rattle and lift into the air, crashing into walls.

You saw movement from the corner of your eye, emotions flaring even further. They had found you. Tears streamed down your cheeks, wetting the front of your sweatshirt. You had already lost everything. They may as well take you now and put you in whatever floating prison they have. They marked you as guilty the moment you walked back into the compound.

“Y/N? Sweetheart, can you hear me?” Bucky approached you slowly, motioning to Steve and Sam to hang back.

You slowly turned to face him. Finally seeing his face broke you, and you started to cry harder. The cot beside you rattled along with desks and shelves, lifting off the floor, quaking violently, erratically. Bucky held up his hands, gesturing to you that he meant you no harm. And you wanted nothing more than to believe him, to melt into his arms.

As your emotions ran wild with fear and anguish, the chaos around you swelled. You shook your head trying to empty it of the intrusive whispers. You were ready to surrender. You just wanted all this to be over, but when you looked past Bucky to see Steve and Sam in their full Avenger gear, a realization hit you. They were here to fight you. Bucky noticed the change in your demeanor. You felt the energy inside you intensifying again. The building began to tremble.

“Y/N. Y/N! Look at me! You’re going to be okay. We’re here to take you home.” Bucky tried to reason.

“No. NO! You’re here to hurt me. You don’t trust me, think I’m HYDRA!”

“That’s not true. We’re your friends. We want to help you,” Bucky insisted.

“Help me? That’s why you brought Captain America and Falcon with you?!”

You were angry now. If they wanted to take you, it would have to be by force. That’s what they wanted. You looked back over at Bucky and noticed the light reflecting off the tears that gathered in his eyes. You felt like you were about to detonate.

“Sweetheart, please,” Bucky pleaded with you; His hand stretched out towards you, beckoning you to take it.

The building shook even more violently with the release of your emotions. Once again, objects cracked and shattered all around you, but this time, the entire building threatened to come down on top of all of you.

“I can’t. I can’t control it….” You looked to Bucky, desperate for all this to end.

As dust and debris rained from the ceiling, you heard the order.

TAKE HER! NOW!

You whipped your head to the side, catching sight of Redwing; you hadn’t noticed it there before, but it was too late. Two darts struck your neck, delivering a powerful sedative. You swayed on your feet for only a moment before going down hard. All the objects flying around the room, uncontrollably, crashed to the ground at once. The building stood still once again. Whatever they hit you with was strong. You couldn’t move, but yet, you weren’t completely unconscious. You could faintly hear distorted commotion around you and your eyes felt heavy.

“Jesus Christ, Steve!” Bucky kneeled at your side to brush your hair from your face, wiping your tears in the process.

“I’m sorry, Buck. We had to. You heard her. She couldn’t control it.”

Bucky gently picked you up and held you close to his chest. You could tell he was walking, but your vision was starting to blur even more. Then you felt his breath on your ear as he whispered that you would be okay. You were safe now. They were going to fix this. You closed your eyes and allowed yourself to sink into the darkness.

THREE WEEKS LATER

“I don’t want to be a prisoner anymore, Bucky.”

“You’re not a prisoner.”

“Well, I can’t leave. That is the definition of prisoner, right?”

“Bruce thinks he’s close to a cure. He just needs a little more time.”

“You’ve been saying that for 3 weeks.”

Bucky offered you a half-hearted smile, but it was tainted with regret.

You were beginning to doubt their ability to fix you. Where would they even begin? You were just the result of another fucked-up half-assed HYDRA experiment. They couldn’t cure you any more than they could cure Bucky or Steve of being super-soldiers. You know it. They know it. You just wish they’d stop blowing smoke up your ass.

Just then, Bruce appeared behind the reinforced glass doors, pressing his palm to the scanner to gain access to your room.

He approached your bed with the same half-hearted smile Bucky imparted.

“Hello, Y/N. How are you feeling today?” Bruce began, like he always did when starting his examinations.

“Fine. Normal. How’s the cure coming along?”

He hesitated for a moment, ignoring your question before continuing with his own.

“Any more headaches?”

“No. Not really.”

“Good, good. That’s good.” More hesitation.

“Just spit it out, Bruce.”

“Well, uh..” he fiddled with his clipboard, pretending to review his findings. “We did some genetic profiling and it looks like the experiment has altered your DNA in ways we’ve never seen before. Your brain scans are phenomenal.”

“That’s not exactly comforting….” You knew where this was going, even though you didn’t completely understand the science of it all.

“What does that mean?” Bucky leaned forward in his seat, prompting Dr. Banner to elaborate.

“Well, I’m afraid it means we can’t cure you.”

Bucky leaned back in his chair; the atmosphere in the room deflated. He didn’t even look at you. You knew this was coming but hearing it out loud and seeing Bucky’s dejected reaction only solidified your fears. There is no hope.

Dr. Banner continued, “The good news is that you seem to be adapting and stabilizing well.”

“Yeah, yeah…” You didn’t want to hear anything else. You weren’t even listening. All you can think about is how you’re no longer an Avenger and how Bucky won’t even look at you now. You lost him; your best friend, maybe more. Where do you go from here?

“I just have a few more questions for you,” Dr. Banner began again, “Are you still able to hear the thoughts of others?”

“Yes. But I can mostly block it out. It’s gotten easier.”

Dr. Banner smiled. “And there haven’t been any more incidents….” He held up his pen. “Can you move this towards you, please?”

You looked up from your lap and focused on the pen, gently floating it above the bed until it reached your grasp.

“Amazing…”

You wished Dr. Banner would be a little less enthusiastic. Your life, as you know it, is over and you’re not in the mood for this.

“Okay. I’m releasing you from my care.”

“Wait. What? When?” You stared at him in awe. Is he joking?

“Right now.” He gathered his notes and left the room, door unlocked.

You felt Bucky grasp your hand. His smile was bright as he waited for your thoughts to catch up.

“Come on. We have a mission,” he coaxed.

“I-I don’t understand,” you hesitated. “I didn’t think you wanted---I didn’t think anyone trusted me.”

“Sweetheart, we do trust you…and I’ll always want you. No matter what.” He squeezed your hand a little tighter. “We found the shitbags that took you…you ready to kick some ass?”

Your eyes lit up with excitement and determination. “I was born ready.”

#whump #avengers #bucky barnes #reader whump #bucky x y/n #female reader #reader insert #avenger reader #steve rogers #sam wilson #captain america #winter soldier #marvel mcu #bucky barnes x reader #kidnapping tw #experimentation #falcon

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astrojulia · 2 years ago

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How can I use astrology to find an ideal career for me?

Astrology and Career: Discover Your Cosmic Sea to Success

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career [ kuh-reer ] noun an occupation or profession, especially one requiring special training, followed as one's lifework: a person's progress or general course of action through life or through a phase of life, as in some profession or undertaking

We have several details to talk about how astrology can help us find our ideal profession and we use what we have in our power to strengthen ourselves and self-knowledge.

Planets

Career as we saw earlier is not just work and your job, it encompasses many things in your life as it is something that takes many years, so all planets show something related to your career.

Sun: The radiant center of our being, revealing our mission, identity, and values. It guides us towards the areas where we seek recognition and how we can contribute to society.

Moon: Reflecting our emotional desires and commitments, the Moon unveils our preferences for a comfortable and nurturing work environment.

Mercury: The realm of analytical skills and communication, Mercury highlights areas where our rational thinking aids and supports us, making tasks easier and efficient.

Venus: Governing our ability to forge relationships and be adored, Venus unveils our potential to sell products or ideas, how others perceive us, and how we can add value.

Mars: The driving force behind our desires and motivations, Mars indicates where we can find energy, passion, and determination to propel us forward.

Ascendant: The extra personal talent, exclusive to each individual, offers a distinct insight into your inherent abilities and potential.

Elements and Modalities

It can be used for each planet (it won't be so detailed, if you want me to talk about each one, like or reblog to show that you are interested in the subject...), but it is used to see the dominant modality and element in the natal chart.

Earth: Seeking security and practicality, Earth signs are adept at managing and structuring tasks, valuing their products and presenting their true worth.

Water: Emotionally driven, Water signs thrive in environments that foster connection and love, often leading to careers where care and bonding are vital.

Air: Driven by intellectual pursuits and interaction with people, Air signs flourish in professions that require intelligence and daily engagement of their diverse skills.

Fire: The passion and drive of Fire signs lead them towards pioneering roles and highly recognized positions, necessitating dynamic and energetic environments.

Cardinal: Initiators and independent spirits, Cardinal signs embrace challenges and take the lead in manifesting their intentions.

Fixed: Penchant for control and security, Fixed signs passionately pursue their interests and maintain unwavering dedication.

Mutable: Embracing change and creativity, Mutable signs excel in professions that allow flexibility and unconventional approaches.

Now... I know that you want career paths you can work on, but I first showed you how you can understand what are your needs and strengths before giving professions because I think it's more important for you to know your needs than to think "wow, look, my natal chart tells me to be a doctor, I think I'll drop everything to do medicine"

How to know if you do well in this career??

1º Way: Identify the ruling planets of the earth houses: 2nd (work and money), 6th (job and routine), and 10th (career) house. Then, determine which house the ruling planet of this house is in. Next, refer to the list below and check if there's a career you like associated with that house. For example, my 2nd ruling planet is in Taurus, and my Venus is in the 5th. Therefore, I'll explore professions related to LEO/FIFTH HOUSE.

2º Way: Identify the career sign you are most interested in. Find the ruling planet of that sign and see if it corresponds to the 2nd,6th or 10th in your birth chart. For instance, I'm interested in reading tarot cards, so I'll check the position of my Pluto (ruler of the 8th). As it's in my 10th, tarot card reading could be a good career choice for me.

3º Way: Identify the planets that fall in your 2nd, 6th and 10th houses and see directly the professions it represents, knowing that in terms of CAREER, the 10th house is more important. So if I have no planets in the 2nd, Venus in the 6th and none in the 10th, I see the carrers that are represented by Venus.

Signs/Houses

ARIES / FIRST HOUSE- athletics, entrepreneurship, leadership, military, police, firefighter, lifeguards, surgeries, creating something, competitive careers …

TAURUS/ SECOND HOUSE - Plastic arts, dressing rooms, painting, things related to food, finance, massage therapy and well-being, services that involve giving a pleasant experience to others, aesthetics.

GEMINI / THIRD HOUSE - writing, journalism, communication, teaching, advertising, libraries, representatives, assistance, performance, things related to organization, information management, research …

CANCER / FOURTH HOUSE - medicine, nursing, veterinary, work that involves taking care of the home and decoration, so also architecture, work that involves taking care of things, restoration, photography, painting, music, art, crafts, accommodation, doula, public offices , trade in household items, babysitting and professions that involve taking care of children, providing services to people in situations of vulnerability, first sector...

LEO/ FIFTH HOUSE- Leader, work related to the government, work related to money and luxury items, work related to leisure and hospitality, entrepreneurship, social networks, presenters of all media, blogs, theater, dance, music, arts in general , directors of artistic projects, cinema, events, fashion, design …

VIRGO / SIXTH HOUSE - Personal organizer (it is the most virgo job in the world), assistance to someone virtual or in person, secretary, work related to organization and analysis, work related to health such as nursing, medicine, pharmacy, work related to mathematics and to money like accounting, librarian, writing, therapy, informatics …

LIBRA / SEVENTH HOUSE - Advocacy, justice, diplomacy, arts, aesthetics, fashion, architecture focused on decoration and beauty, sales, high quality and refined products, design, work related to people …

SCORPIO / EIGHT HOUSE - psychiatry, medicine, psychology, police, military, research, astrology, works related to people who died as gravediggers and doctors who do autopsy, spirituality and the occult, coach, investments, administration, politics, research in any field. ..

SAGITTARIUS / NINTH HOUSE - Politics, justice, diplomacy, tourism, religion, teaching a higher education course, teaching wisdom, philosophers, careers related to foreign countries, foreign trade, sports, careers involving recreational activities, careers with more playful areas such as theater, dance and circus, astrology.

CAPRICORN / TENTH HOUSE - Management and entrepreneurship, CEO, engineering and areas that use mathematics, construction, land-related jobs and projects for places or businesses, management, jobs that involve preparing something like a director developing a play or a project , producers. . .

AQUARIUS / ELEVENTH HOUSE - Science, astrology, everything related to technology, information technology, social media, TV and radio, politics, social projects, social sciences, social causes and social assistance (very social this sign), projects humanitarian and altruistic, demonstration and mobilization of people, jobs that aim to revolutionize and change society and the way people live their lives …

PISCES/ TWELVE HOUSE - Psychology, music, theater, crafts, spirituality, therapy, holistic therapy, careers that involve helping others and social causes, work related to hospitals, nursing and caring for others, jobs that help people who have some kind of neurological imbalance or older people or who are on the margins of society in some way.

Planets

Sun: The Sun empowers individuals to take on leadership roles and excel in careers related to the government, money, luxury items, leisure, and hospitality industries. The Sun's radiant energy blesses entrepreneurs, social network influencers, media presenters, bloggers, artists in various forms (theater, dance, music, and arts), directors of artistic projects, cinema, events, and professionals in fashion and design.

Moon: The nurturing influence of Moon shines upon careers in medicine, nursing, veterinary, nutrition, and professions involving home care, decoration, and architecture. Lua's caring nature extends to jobs that involve restoration, photography, painting, music, art, crafts, hosting, doula work, public office, commerce of household goods, nannies, and roles providing services to vulnerable individuals, especially in the first sector, as well as culinary arts and cooking.

Mercury: The intellectual prowess of Mercury guides individuals towards careers in information technology, writing, journalism, communication, teaching, advertising, libraries, and as representatives. Mercury's sharp mind is well-suited for roles as personal organizers, virtual or face-to-face assistants, secretaries, and professionals in the pharmacy sector. Additionally, Mercury's association with mathematics and money makes it relevant in accounting, librarianship, writing, and computing.

Venus: The artistic and harmonious energy of Venus blesses individuals in careers related to plastic arts, fitting rooms, painting, and the culinary arts. Venus finds fulfillment in professions associated with food, finance, massage therapy, well-being, aesthetics, law, justice, diplomacy, fashion, and architecture focused on decoration and beauty. Venus also thrives in sales, dealing with high-quality products, design, and people-related work.

Mars: The bold and assertive influence of Mars directs individuals towards careers in athletics, entrepreneurship, leadership, military, police, firefighting, lifeguarding, surgery, and any field that requires competitive spirit and a drive to create something remarkable. Mars also finds expression in careers related to medicine.

Jupiter: Jupiter's expansive and benevolent energy inspires careers in politics, justice, diplomacy, tourism, religion, higher education, teaching wisdom, and philosophy. Jupiter's connection to foreign trade and astrology adds depth to careers related to these fields.

Saturn: The disciplined and structured influence of Saturn leads individuals towards careers in administration, entrepreneurship, CEO positions, engineering, and areas that involve mathematics. Saturn's expertise in construction and project management makes it valuable in various roles, including those of directors and producers.

Uranus: The innovative and revolutionary spirit of Uranus shines upon careers in science, technology, social media, politics, NGOs, social projects, and humanitarian efforts. Uranus is also influential in social sciences, social causes, and careers that involve social assistance, aiming to transform and uplift society.

Neptune: Neptune's compassionate and spiritual essence guides individuals towards careers in psychology, music, theater, crafts, spirituality, therapy, and holistic therapy. Neptune finds fulfillment in professions that involve helping others and social causes, particularly in healthcare settings. Jobs linked to hospitals, nursing, and care for others resonate with Neptune's healing energy.

Pluto: The transformative and powerful influence of Pluto leads individuals towards careers in psychiatry, medicine, psychology, investigation, astrology, spirituality, occultism, coaching, investment, administration, politics, and scientific research. Pluto's connection to matters of life and death makes it relevant in fields such as gravedigging and forensic medicine, while its association with transformation and marketing adds depth to careers in the marketing industry.

Julia's Special Note

I enjoy helping people, so let me share a unique insight that you won't find anywhere else. Jupiter and Saturn play significant roles in determining our value in both personal and societal contexts. Jupiter represents the value that society places on us, while Saturn signifies the value we place on ourselves in relation to society. In short, these two planets can reveal insights into your salary and financial gains in your profession. The key aspect here is their conjunction. For many years, Jupiter and Saturn have been meeting in earth signs, indicating a strong emphasis on material values, productivity, and tangible outcomes. This means that society has highly valued material success, productivity, and practical skills. However, over the next 200 years, they will conjoin in air signs, signaling a shift in societal values. The focus will move towards knowledge, expertise, teaching abilities, effective communication, and the dissemination of information. In this new era, what garners a good salary today may no longer hold the same value in 200 years. Thus, it won't matter so much what profession you have, but rather, the greatest differentiating factor for achieving good financial gains will be how much you know and specialize in your chosen field, rather than just how much you produce.

(CC) AstroJulia Some Rights Reserved

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russellsppttemplates · 1 year ago

Text

It's like we won't even be there (Lewis Hamilton)

Mercedes has three power couples

Note: english is not my first language. After a long time, I'm finally posting this request.

my masterlist

Tw: mentions gender inequality, misogynistic ideals

Tag list: @myloverjk-blog

"Everyone on social media has an inkling that you're bringing someone to the race. Is it your belle, Mr. Hamilton?", you teased your boyfriend as he got ready for bed.

You had arrived in Abu Dhabi a few hours earlier, caught a cab to the hotel where your boyfriend had been resting before media day.

"Is that so?", he wondered, "I haven't told anyone outside the team. And even them, I told them you would be joining as my guest, only a few people actually know about us", he assured.

"I don't mind it, we'll have to be public at some time. Three years dating outside of the public eye, plus another year of what the kids call soft launching, whatever happens this weekend, happens", you tranquilized him.

This had been an ongoing conversation for you for as long as you've dated. His lifestyle came with many implications, particularly not always being home and public eye. You also spent a lot of time focused on your job, building the company now associated to your name to the people in the finance business, so the latter question was the biggest one. While you were successful, it hardly impacted your life when it came to the public eye or social media. You had your accounts, sure, but they were private and they never got in the way of your job.

"I just don't want people to lash out on you", he replied, sitting next to you on the bed, his fingers tracing shapes in your hand, "I've seen how brutal they can be, I've felt how brutal they can be, and I don't want that for you. They'll gossip because that's how things work, but I don't want them breaking the respect line.", Lewis stated.

"Lew, I understand and appreciate your concern, but I'll be fine. I have you, our families, our friends, I'm going to be just fine. I don't know how they'll react, so I'll work with whatever happens", you smiled, snuggling into him as he caressed your face.

"Good morning, Y/N! How have you been? I haven't seen you in so long!", Carmen said as she hugged you once you arrived in the hospitality, Lewis kissing your cheek briefly before he headed for his meeting.

"Hello, gorgeous girl! I've been good, and you?", you greeted her with a kiss on each cheek after saying goodbye to Lewis.

"Same old, busy but managed to come and support G this weekend. You, however, seem to finally let it out", she smirked, walking with you to the coffee station and serving yourselves, sitting in the balcony as you overlooked the track.

"There's no point in keeping it a secret, I guess. We did it for a while, and this past year we both realised that we want to be able to go out and not be worried someone will see us and whatever consequences it could bring. We're adults who hope other adults will behave like such", you smiled.

"A hard thing to do sometimes, for them at least", you heard a female voice coming closer to you, "I don't believe we've met before, but Toto said you were hanging out here", the blonde woman said.

Suzie Wolff had been someone you looked up to since you were little, so this was a proper fangirl moment, "sit, sit! This is Y/N!", Carmen introduced after giving her a brief introduction.

"I keep missing you whenever you join us for the races!", she said, "the pandemic didn't help, and lately I've been so busy with the F1 Academy that I've hardly been to races myself", she reasoned, beginning the start of a conversation that was only interrupted for lunchtime.

"Press usually have a field day with powerful women related to this sport. You should be able to get away with it because you don't work for racing, but they love going on and on about how we got to where we are because of who we date", Suzie shook her head.

"Absolutely, because George is very interested in Family Offices and he got me my job", Carmen rolled her eyes, "you try and give that guy math stuff and you see how it turns out! Besides, not many people actually knew who he was, they're not very into motorsport, only a couple of them!", she teased.

"Agreed! The only way I was able to have my own company was because I name dropped Lewis, who I didn't know at the time. He doesn't know his numbers all that well. It's so easy for them to point fingers, but it's really just because they hate to see a powerful woman get the job done", you offered, seeing your partners arrive to the table along Laura.

"Social media is going crazy about you, Y/N!", Laura, one of the team's social media managers said while you had lunch, "there's people who spent the whole morning trying to find out who you were and they were faling to find your accounts. Apparently, they were looking in model agencies and such until someone pointed out you studied at the same university as them, and it's pointed them in the right direction I'd say?", she shrugged her shoulders, showing you her phone as she scrolled through media, "they're still trying to find out more, but they only have a few articles from your company and a picture of you when you graduated that is on the university's Wall of Fame!", she made you giggle, fondly looking at the wall of pictures you saw everyday on your way to lectures.

"Are you on the Wall of Fame and didn't tell us, Y/N?", Carmen exclaimed at the new information, "it's barely anything, I'm still there probably because someone forgot to remove the picture", you blushed, suddenly feeling like the table's attention was on you.

"Why would they take out the picture of the most beautiful woman with the most achievements?", Lewis charmed, holding your hand in his as he smiled.

"Are you guys ready for the race? If all goes well, we can get back to the points!", Suzie cheered as she handed you and Carmen your bottles of water.

"Lew has been beating himself up a lot lately, hopefully everything works in their favour", you held your hands together after setting the water bottle on the counter.

It was very touch and go, but the boys ended up with good results given the position they started in.

"Congrats, my love!", you said in Lewis' ear as he squeezed your torso over the barrier, delighting the sight of everyone who was watching and seeing the happy couple, "couldn't have done it without you, gorgeous girl", he yelled back, stealing a kiss before running to the mechanics.

"I'm just going to check where Suzie is and then we can go for dinner, guys", Toto stated, squeezing George's and Lewis' shoulders before checking is phone to see if his wife had seen the text he sent about said dinner.

"The F1 Academy paddock is closed, you can see it from here that nobody is there", George pointed out as his boss frowned.

"I would help you, but I have to go and look for Carmen, too", George scratched his cheek as they walked along the corridor, seeing Lewis open his driver's room door and slumping his shoulders slightly, "Y/N is not here either".

"Where have the Mercedes missus gone...?", Toto muttered.

It didn't take then long to hear the mix of your three giggles coming from the lounging area, the three of you sat in the smaller sofas around a coffee table, hot drinks in your hands as you discussed something avidly but in a relaxing way still.

"Are the three of you willing to have dinner with the three of us? We'll still let you speak between yourselves, okay? It's like we won't even be there!", Toto joked.

#lewis hamilton imagine #lewis hamilton x reader #lewis hamilton fanfic #lewis hamilton fluff #f1 x reader #f1 imagine #f1 fanfic

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