#not related to anything that happened in particular i was just reminded of how i feel about this kinda stuff

[aboutcustardcreams]

Wake up call

pt. 1

a/n: I'm not going to follow the series episode by episode, as I already mentioned. This story will focus primarily on the three witches' story, so I'll probably jump forward and back in time at my own discretion from now on. If you're curious about something in particular, feel free to tell me in the comments. Would you prefer that I go back or forward from now on? (also, sorry for eventual typos or mistakes).

pt. 2

Agatha looked as surprised as you for a moment. The boy was on his knees, squirming uncomfortably at the rope around his wrists and ankles. He said something, his voice sounded muffled through the duct tape.

“Oh, uhm.. well, I may have accidentally kidnapped him.” 

You blinked in disbelief, “How can you accidentally kidnap someone?”

The kid muttered something else you couldn’t quite comprehend. You thought it was his way to agree with you, so you grinned, whereas Agatha groaned in annoyance. As the boy persisted, you realized what he really wanted from you. 

“Oh–”, you mouthed a quick apology, lips stretching in an awkward smile as you took the tape off his mouth with a quick puck. He winced, but then muttered a ‘thanks’ to you. Had he been locked in there the whole night? Instead of that, you asked a different question, “you alright?”, twirling your finger, you made him turn around to untie the rope around his wrists and ankles. 

He sighed and gave you a grateful smile once free, “much better.”

Your lips pressed into a thin line, not really sure about what else was to say, despite having tons of questions. There couldn’t be a moment worse than this to have to deal with a kid. 

“Agatha, love, care to explain?” 

Your lover paid no attention, or rather she feigned to be distracted doing practically nothing more than walking up and down the house, as she mentally freaked out due to the last events. 

“There’s nothing to explain–”, she waved dismissively, “For all I care he can keep the house.” 

The boy frowned and quite frankly so did you. You walked up to her, confusion written all over your features, “Agatha, what in heaven are you talking about?” 

The boy followed behind in silence.

When she suddenly spun around, Agatha was so close, you almost stumbled backwards. “Did you listen to Rio’s words or not?” There was a hint of frustration in her tone, quite relatable in fact, and yet...

Your head lolled to the side, “so your plan is to leave?”

“Glad you’re catching up," she grinned cheekily. 

With no magic at her disposal, she had no intention of facing the Salem Seven, and even less letting you anywhere near them to save her life. So running was the best and only option she could think of at the moment; that hopefully would give her enough time to figure out a way to restore her magic and be a witch again.

You ran a hand through your hair, eyes glancing only briefly over the boy, who gave you a tight smile in return. A part of you wondered what he was doing still there. Didn't he have places to be, like school or whatever? 

Before Agatha could walk from you again, you reached out to grab her wrist, “So, this is what we will do,” you started, silently enjoying the whiny sound slipping from her lips, “we sit down, talk it out like mature adults, and you–” pointing a finger at the boy, “you’re gonna tell me why you broke into our house in the first place.”

“Uhm.. yeah, I..”

“We don’t have time for this!” Agatha exclaimed, “Need I remind you there’s a price on our heads?” 

A playful smirk tugged at your lips and unable to resist teasing her, you quipped, “technically it’s on yours. I only happen to be in your shit as per usual.” 

The boy let out a quiet chuckle, that you were about to reciprocate hadn't it been for Agatha’s hand flapping at the nape of your neck, “Oof!" you whined. 

Amusement glimmered in her eyes, “You had it coming,” she retorted. Then she glanced over the boy, with a grimace. “Not to be rude or anything, but we’ve got a lot on our plate so if you could just–” She pointed to where the front door used to be, her confidence dimming slightly, “this house is a complete disaster.”

She looked so annoyed right now, tired and scared even, but the latter she would never admit. Completely forgetting about the boy, you focused on Agatha and placed a hand over the small of her back, “it’s not so bad…” you trailed off, resting your chin on her shoulder. She knew you weren't only referring to the conditions of the house. Her eyes fell shut for a moment, her features relaxed when you started stroking her skin, lips barely brushing against a soft spot behind her ear, “we have an excuse to redecorate now.”

Despite everything, Agatha let out a small chuckle. She turned around and draped an arm around your waist. With everything that happened in such a short time, she hadn’t given herself a moment to truly cherish the fact that you were back—the real you. Sure, even without your memories, you stood by Agatha’s side all those years, but having you here now, like in the old days, felt different. It was different. Her eyes darted from your face to your collarbone, nose scrunching up at the sight of the nasty bluish bruise— a reminder of Rio’s hands on you. Her hand glided up to your face, tracing your jawline before slowly moving down to your collarbone, fingers barely grazing your skin, mindful that it was still tender and possibly sore. 

“Are you–?” 

Your eyes softened at the hesitation in her voice, “you shouldn’t worry about that.”

“I always worry about what matters," she argued back. 

"Cheeky," you teased.

With an eye roll, she smirked, "brat."

When her eyes darted towards the boy once again, she let out an incredulous scoff, “you better have a darn good reason to still be dangling here.” 

Color drained from his face. Quite frankly, Agatha could be intimidating when she tried. Even when she didn't. “I-I do!” He cleared his throat. “I want to walk the Witches' Road. It’s the only reason why I broke in here really and–” he was talking so fast, for a moment you thought your mind had tricked you. There was no way he said the words ‘witches’ and ‘road’ in the same sentence. 

Agatha's eyes snapped wide open, “what’s that you say?”

“The Witches’ Road,” he repeated, slower and firmly. It hit you hard. You couldn't help it. “I want you to take me there,” his eyes softened and so did his voice as he added, “please.”

Agatha tried to meet your eyes then, but you had your gaze dropped to the floor. 

“The Witches’ Road doesn’t exist.”

“You’re lying,” he argued. 

Agatha scoffed bitterly, “am I?”, voice rising in exasperation. 

When you slowly lifted your chin towards the boy, you squint your eyes so much as if you were troubled by a sudden headache, “You’re asking for a death wish here.” 

Agatha agreed, “quite literally.” 

The boy looked crestfallen, but he didn’t back down, “You only say that because you think I’m inexperienced, which is fair. I am. But I can make it to the end-” 

Your lips pursed in a grimace as you tried to make sense of everything that was happening. First Rio, then the Salem Seven on your heels, and now this boy who had no idea what he was asking for.

“Look, I love your confidence– but the Road is no place for a kid.”

Agatha sank into the couch in the lounge, curling a finger at you in invitation. Smiling, you obliged, perching yourself on the armrest beside her. You were close enough that her hand could slip to rest on your thigh, her fingers tracing soft, lazy patterns over the fabric of your pants. The gentle rhythm of her touch soothed you, and you allowed yourself to calm your nerves, focusing on her proximity and nothing else. 

“I’m sixteen,” he objected, taking a seat onto the chair across from you. 

“Oh, why didn’t you say that before? That changes… nothing.”

You had to stifle a laugh at her sarcastic remark. 

He gave a dramatic eye roll. “Come on! You walked it before and survived!” 

Your brows knit in a frown. Just how much did that boy actually understand about you and Agatha? Or rather, how much did he think he understood? No one truly knew what it had been like for the two of you back in the eighteenth century. People clung to their own assumptions, and you let them—after all, the real truth was far too painful to share. Not a single soul knew the true story behind the reputation Agatha had built, nor the reasons why so many had to die in the first place. 

Agatha’s hand stilled on your thigh, “I had a very good reason to stay alive, plus I’m exceptional.”

It wasn’t a lie, not completely at least. 

The boy’s eyes shifted from Agatha’s to yours. You felt as if he knew what Agatha was talking about you. You saw something, a glimpse of understanding in those eyes that somehow unsettled you. If Agatha was known as ‘witch killer’ for all the wrong reasons, your reputation also preceded you, but you struggled to say the words. 

“I read an egregious amount about you two. I’ve been obsessed since I first came up with your Salem days… the way you two met, and oh my God- don’t get me started on your magic skills.”

So you and Agatha had a little fan. 

Agatha’s interest rose considerably. She grinned, “cute. Isn't he a cute pet?” 

“Honestly, I’m not sure whether to be flattered or freaked out by all this interest,” you mused.

The boy completely ignored the fact that Agatha just called him pet. “Sorry, I just– you’re a necromancer witch!” He was now struggling to keep a posed tone of voice, and you found yourself scratching the back of your head, not really used to being praised by your gift/curse. Quite the opposite in fact. “Guilty as charged,” you quipped.

Agatha’s hand moved towards your knee, thumb brushing in a soothing circle there. You smiled inwardly at the gesture.

“Books say witches your kind are so rare, powerful and–”

“harrowed, banished, burned at the stake?” You cut him off in a sing-song tone. 

Agatha snorted, “you name it.”

She knew better than anyone what it felt like to be brushed aside. It was one of the reasons why she could bond with you so easily and so quickly. You understood her before she could even attempt to comprehend the complexity about herself and her power. 

Teen blinked confusedly, “I was gonna say interesting.”

You clasped your hands together and took a deep breath. “Look, we appreciate your enthusiasm. You seem like a really smart boy, and I’m sure you’re destined for great things, but we can’t help you, not with that-” 

“But I saved Agatha from the spell…” his smile turned into a frown and his features dimmed  as a consequence, “I’d have come to you too if she hadn’t locked me up in the closet. But w-wait,” he suddenly came to a halt, eyebrows knitting in a frown as a new question popped up in his mind. “How did you wake up from the hex?”

Agatha knew, but said nothing, leaving the explanations to you.

“It’s hard to explain–” Being a necromancer allowed you to have all sorts of… vibes. Plus your soul was connected to Agatha’s and her life being threatened by something– or rather someone you knew quite well worked as a wake up bell for you, “it’s like a sixth sense, but better. I can always feel when Agatha needs me. I got a pull into reality the moment Rio broke into the house with the purpose of harming her. I felt her aura. She and I– let’s just say our magic works like opposite poles of a magnet.”

Agatha’s features hardened a bit, as she nibbled on the inside of her cheek out of nervousness. Your magic being complementary to Rio’s had caused you more problems than anything else. She almost lost you to her, and that’s something she would probably never forget. 

The boy hummed in thought. He was clearly intrigued by your magic and took a mental note to ask you more questions at the first next opportunity, considering he left his notebook in the car.

“And who’s Rio? I didn’t hear much but– there seemed to be a history–”

“Trouble.”

“A bitch.”

Both you and Agatha said in unison. 

“We don’t really need to talk about her now…” you kept vague, hoping he would catch the silent message passing through your eyes. Talking about her was never easy, not when your feelings for her were so tangled and conflicting. You’d be lying if you said you didn’t love her anymore, cause you still did. And Agatha... well, she probably did too, however, she would never admit it, not to you and even less to herself. The past clung like a shadow, and neither of you could ever truly forget. The ache of Rio's choices lingered, buried deep, a silent reminder of what your bond once was and could never be again. 

He pressed his lips together and gave you a slow nod of his head in return. 

“I’m curious,” she smacked her lips, your head turned towards her, as she continued, “If you’ve got the goods to break a spell cast by the Scarlet Witch, why do you need the Road?”

Your eyes widened in shock. Was she really considering this?

“The Road promises that what you’re looking for awaits at its end. I need to walk the road so I can figure out the extent of my power..” he explained and she hummed, eyes narrowing ever so slightly. “Don’t you need power yourself?”

Agatha’s back stiffened, “I most certainly do, yes.”

“She doesn’t need to walk the Witches' Road for that,” you pointed out, glancing at the purple witch with the corner of your eyes. 

The boy was confused. Without giving him too much information, you simply told him that you could share your magic. And, in a way, it was true. A more accurate version would have been explaining that Agatha could kill a witch by absorbing all her power, leaving nothing behind but dust. But that was far too dramatic, plus you were still one hundred percent sure she couldn’t and wouldn’t harm you in any way.

She let out a long, exhausted sigh at your insistence, “For the umpteenth time, I’m not taking your magic–” 

“Ugh!" You groaned. "Aggs, Rio warned us–”

“She mentioned the Salem Seven, didn’t she?” The boy cut you off. “I’m sorry but y-you’ve got zero chances against them without magic, Agatha.” 

She shot him an icy glare, “Thank you for stating the obvious.”

Your lips trembled a bit, as you struggled to hold back an amused grin.

“I’m just trying to understand which alternatives you have,” he muttered defensively. 

Agatha opened her mouth to say something, but nothing came out. Nothing that she could use to hush both you and the kid. 

“He’s got a point, you know. You need my magic, like right now.” 

Once again, she ignored you. “Or maybe, we need to walk the Witches' Road one last time.”

The boy’s mouth parted ajar, “Really?”

“Really?” You echoed in a squeak. 

She simply nodded her head, giving you an innocent smile that only fueled your incredulity. You let out a quiet, bitter chuckle right after, at the same time shaking your head in disbelief. 

“Agatha, sweetheart, a word?” 

You held out your hand for her to take, and just like she did a moment ago, you forced a serene, tranquil smile—one that didn’t quite reach your eyes but would have fooled anyone who didn’t know you better. She took your hand, her fingers curling around yours as she let you lead her toward the kitchen. Once you were far enough from the boy to speak more privately, you locked eyes with Agatha. Your face was practically shouting, ‘What the hell?!’ —a silent message that she heard loud and clear, without a single word spoken.

“The Road doesn’t exist! What’s your plan?” 

“We are the only ones aware of that,” she stated matter of factly as if that could be used as a great advantage. “Teen is right, without my magic, I can’t defend myself against the Salem Seven, I can’t protect myself or you.” 

If this wasn’t handled carefully, it could spiral into something much worse. You knew, better than anyone, how deeply it hurt Agatha to feel powerless, especially when it came to protecting those she loved. She had faced this agony with Nicky, and now, here she was again, reliving the same fear, this time, for you. Her own life, in that moment, felt like nothing compared to yours. Because without you in it, there was no existence worth living for her. 

“You could,” you insisted, in a low, almost pleading tone. “if only you took my power–” It was so easy.

“I’m not willing to take any risks with you,” she stepped into your bubble, her hands tightening around your shoulders, in a possessive and yet still attentive way. She wanted you to understand. She needed you to be on her side on this. “I need to make sure I've got control over my thirst first. It's been so long since the last time I did that so I'm sorry but you’ll not be the lab rat for it.”

“Are you really thinking of using the boy?” 

Agatha’s mouth dropped open, “Oh no, my God- no! I’m not talking about Teen, you idiot!” 

You crossed your arms over your chest and gave her a defiant look.

She gave in after a bunch of seconds, “Okay, maybe I did think of him for a minute. He did break the Scarlet Witch’s hex, though." 

You pinched the bridge of your nose at that.

“But we still need to ‘walk’ the Witches Road, except that this time, we aren’t killing anyone,” you’re ready to argue back again, but she didn’t let you, so you bit your bottom lip instead, trying really trying to find the silver lining at the end of this plan. “Here’s what we will do: we gather a coven, make some female friends, sing the Ballad, it doesn’t work, wowie-!, I call them names, they get angry and blast me. I take their magic and stop right before they turn into dust.”

She paused and took into your eyes, letting you assimilate her words, hopeful you’d find her idea good enough, because there was really no time for anything else. 

“So, to recap—,” you cleared your throat, “you’re willing to lie to that kid, to the poor witches we’ll meet along the way, witches who’ll eventually turn against us once they learn our intentions, but you’re not willing to take my magic that’s literally within arm’s length because you’re scared you’ll kill me.” 

She hummed, feeling quite satisfied with your summary, “yep.”

A slow smirk spread across your lips, “You’re crazy.”

“Maybe," she conceded. "But this plan’s gonna work.” Agatha shifted closer, her hands sliding to your hips, her fingers pressing into your skin with a slight possessive touch. 

Your gaze fell to where her hands rested and for a moment, there was silence. 

Time ticked. She waited. 

“Fine. Oh my God- fine–” 

Before you could say anything else, she pulled you into a crashing hug. Your pout quickly turned into an amused smile, and finally into a fit of giggles when her lips began peppering kisses all over your face. 

“Atta girl!” She said with a proud grin, to which you responded with a snort. 

You’d be pissed, though, if by the end of the day, you’d be forced to resurrect a bunch of witches. But you kept quiet about that.

[anthromimicry]

[meat-pvppet]

alot of people would be so much happier with life if they blocked liberally instead of writing long winded posts and ranting and raving and stewing in their anger just saying

[zeawesomebirdie]

Superbat Fake Dating + Identity Porn Rec List

Thanks to @jourquet for asking for this!! I hope you find something here to read!! (And paging @steine-druff as promised!)

These are in no particular order, but generally organised by trope. I tend to read longfic as a general rule, so these recs will reflect that :) the titles contain links to each fic.

Fake Dating

1. A Common Misconception by rotasha; rated T; no archive warnings apply; 91,114 words; 21 chapters; complete

Summary:

When Bruce Wayne comes out, he accidentally becomes the poster child of bisexuality and realizes his lifestyle of sleeping around needs to come to an end. Clark, being the supportive friend that he is, volunteers to pretend to date him for a year.

You know the rest.

This fic has everything that one could want in fake dating: idiots in love, mutual pining, one bed, fake vacations, miscommunication. It also really captures the superbat dynamic of trusting and yes and-ing each other, even when they probably didn't need to be!

(And if you like this fic, any of rotasha's other works are just as good! I've got a few more of them in this list too)

2. over this threshold by orphean; rated T; no archive warnings apply; 59,283 words; 7 chapters; complete

Summary:

'I don't understand how tax evasion relates to you going on a date with, do I need to remind you, Bruce Wayne.'

Clark bit his tongue.

'We're going to get married. It's a tax break, not tax evasion.'

'Are you kidding me.' Lois stared. 'That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard.'

———

Bruce asks Clark to marry him for tax reasons. Clark, against his better judgment, agrees.

Exactly what it says on the tin. Some highlights include Bruce buying Clark ridiculously expensive suits, Clark taking forever to tell his mom what's going on, and of course the wedding itself which was just delightful, with speeches from Lois, Alfred, and Dick that had me crying.

3. A Rich Man's Game by malicegreres; rated T; no archive warnings apply; 63,942 words; 13 chapters; complete

Summary:

The editorial staff of the Daily Planet, currently owned by Bruce Wayne, is trying to organize a labor union. Clark can't explain to his coworkers why he can't participate without jeopardizing the campaign—or tell Batman why he's been so cagey around him lately. When Bruce finds out what's been going on, Clark recruits him to resolve his conflict of interest in the only way Clark can think of: by pretending to date him.

This fic is truly glorius. Of all the ways Clark could have solved this problem, he chose the most convoluted. And surprise surprise, it works!

4. mission parameters by shipyrds; rated E; no archive warnings apply; 33,394 words; 6 chapters; complete

Summary:

"Bruce." Clark turns towards him, leaning back against a bank of consoles. "We're not actually going undercover. We don't need an elaborate backstory– if anything, it'll be harder to keep straight. It doesn't have to be complicated." He spreads his hands. "Here's a story: we're members of the same elite fighting force. After years of saving each other's lives in the field, we fell in love. That's it."

Bruce swallows past the almost-truth of it. In Clark's warm smooth radio voice, it sounds plausible. It sounds like something that could happen.

—

Bruce and Clark pretend to be married for diplomatic reasons. When they return to Earth, things are a little different.

Of all the things that normally Bruce says, Clark is the one to insist on a simple coverstory. And of course, from such simple things spirals out a whole entire adventure that doesn't stop just because the mission is over! This fic features a domesticity that neither of them knew they needed until they had it

5. tell all the truth (but tell it slant) by susiecarter [@susiecarter on tumblr]; rated M; no archive warnings apply; 33,007 words; 1 chapter; complete

Summary:

It takes a while for Batman and Superman to work things out, once Clark comes back from the dead. Pretending to date each other in order to explain why Bruce Wayne and Clark Kent are in the same place so often? Doesn't help as much as you might think.

*slapping this fic like that one meme with the car* this fic can fit so much miscommunication into it, it's truly delightful to read!! Also, yet another fic where Clark fails to mention what's going on to his mother. And of course the constant worrying about each other without actually expressing it, which is truly such a golden trope when it comes to these two!

I'm adding a cut here because this is already very long and we are still only just starting, so click the read more to see the rest ^.^

6. there ain't no star that shines by amosangius [@amosanguis on tumblr]; rated E; no archive warnings apply; 11,713 words; 1 chapter; complete

Summary:

“I'm not the same person I was back in high school,” Clark says, “and I doubt they all are, either. What would be the point?”

“Oh, Clark,” Bruce is suddenly holding Clark's face with both of his hands, “the point is that I'm going to land us in a helicopter somewhere for all your classmates to see.”

Clark sighs and closes his eyes.

“Say 'yes', Clark,” Bruce orders.

Clark doesn't open his eyes, just says, “Yes, Clark.”

If you thought Bruce buying Clark expensive suits just for their fake dates was excessive, you ain't seen nothing yet!! This fic also features casual bed sharing (and so many references to casual intimacy oh my goodness it's lovely), Bruce Wayne being Rich As Fuck, and Bruce casually being overprotective of Clark in social situations

7. my heart is an open wound by yukla [@yuebings on tumblr]; rated T; no archive warnings apply; 13,367 words; 1 chapter; complete

“—I’ll see you kneel again,” Luthor is hissing, eyes hungry, and Clark is swaying back in discomfort—and as Lois checks their surroundings again, she notices that Wayne is still standing across the room, staring uselessly, as though he believes the sheer force of his murderous gaze would be enough to laser-blast Luthor into oblivion.

Jesus Christ, Lois thinks. I have to do everything around here.

5 times a Daily Planet employee protects Clark Kent, and 1 time Clark Kent protects the Daily Planet.

Or: Clark's coworkers watch as he fake-dates his crush with limited success.

It is probably obvious by now that miscommunication and Bruce's emotions getting in the way of everything are two of my favourite things to read. All of Clark's coworkers are the best, and once again Clark is a self-sacrificing idiot (affectionate)

8. flash in the pan by shipyrds; rated E; no archive warnings apply; 15,951 words; 3 chapters; complete

Summary:

Here’s the thing. Clark does understand. Superman and Batman are fucking. Clark Kent and Bruce Wayne are not. Clark can handle this. He keeps parts of his life separate all the time.

It’s possible, Clark thinks, as he glares at a lurid tabloid cover of Bruce’s latest scandalous yacht party in the grocery store checkout aisle, that he can’t handle this.

—

At the Wayne Foundation's annual holiday party, things come to a head.

Okay there is so much I want to say about this fic and yet there are no words that could possibly express just how incredible it is. Bruce coming up with the worst case scenario for literally everything? Check. Clark agreeing to fake date even though he's majorly head over heels and this will likely end in flames? Check. Ma Kent giving the best relationship advice ever? Check. Dick yelling at Bruce when he tries to self sabotage again? Check. Truly one of the best fucking-but-still-pining fics I've ever read!

9. Operation Sponsalia by Brenda [@brendaonao3 on tumblr]; rated E; no archive warnings apply; 13,610 words; 1 chapter; complete

Summary:

"When did you first realize you were in love with me?"

Bruce coughs up his wine.

"I mean, in this...whatever this is," Clark clarifies, blushing to the roots of his hair. "I don't think you're really — I mean, I know this isn't —"

"It's alright." Bruce's voice is raspy, but steady. "I know what you mean."

Clark's glad one of them does.

Or: Bruce and Clark have to fake an engagement for ~reasons — featuring a metric ton of very romantic dates, enough floral arrangements to start a flower shop, SO MANY puns, and Clark finally getting to know the real Bruce. :D

Clark doesn't find out that Bruce said to the press that they had been dating long enough to be teasing enagagements until after it's already been said. Was there a better way to explain why Bruce just happened to help save the Kent family farm? Absolutely. And yet they follow through on it anyway, and I love it for them

10. Sham-pagne by ChrisLeon; rated T; no archive warnings apply; 8,248 words; 1 chapter; complete

Summary:

Superman is spotted visiting Wayne Manor, prompting speculation about how exactly he knows Bruce Wayne. To protect their secret identities, they need a plausible explanation and it seems easy enough to go along with the tabloid theory that they’re sleeping together. All they have to do is pretend to be in a relationship until the speculation dies down and then they can break up move on.

Or: Superman fake-dates Bruce Wayne, we all know how this ends.

This one was fascinating to me because instead of Clark and Bruce dating, it's Superman and Bruce dating, and let me just say I'm so incredibly hinged about it!! I think there is so much potential in that particular version of their dynamic, and this fic was such a beautiful exploration of it!

11. Speaking in Code by Mithen; rated T; no archive warnings apply; 7,459 words; 1 chapter; complete

Summary:

Clark and Bruce must go undercover at a newlywed resort to try and stop an assassination attempt. Hijinks, UST, and reluctant making out ensue.

First of all, Mithen is a superbat master. Pick any fic of theirs and it will be delightful. Second of all, I could write an entire essay about how much I adore the way they go from irritable about this mission to incredibly enthuasiastic over the course of their two days at the resort, but then we'd be here all day so: if you like banter, one bed, and a case fic this is a brilliant read

12. Kind Truths by Mawiiish [@superbattrash on tumblr]; rated G; creator chose not to use archive warnings; 6,478 words; 1 chapter; complete

Summary:

Bruce needs help with an undercover mission. Clark can never say no to him even though he probably should before he does something stupid. Like tell Bruce he's in love with him.

--

“Why me?” Clark can’t help but ask. He tries his very best to keep his voice level, to not sound as desperate as he feels.

“Because I need someone there to watch my back,” Bruce says, a little exasperated. He really shouldn’t have to explain this to Clark of all people, it’s not like they haven’t been on missions together before.

“I get that, but what about Diana? Shayera?” Anyone who doesn’t have a big fat crush on Bruce would do.

Is it obvious I have a thing for Clark agreeing to fake dating despite his big crush on Bruce? This fic is glorious, and features delights such as Bruce metaphorically putting his foot in his mouth, Clark wanting nothing more than to defend Bruce's honor, and one of the most beautiful confession scenes I've ever had the pleasure of reading

13. where i come from by soetry [@soetrys on tumblr]; E; no archive warnings apply; 52,494 words; 11 chapters; complete

Summary:

Bruce doesn’t have a soulmark, and Clark doesn’t have a soulmark, on an Earth where everyone has a soulmark. Somewhere in there is a simple solution. Somewhere to that solution is an overcomplicated journey. Surely two of the world’s leading superheroes will not take the overcomplicated route?

Surely not?

This one is a little bit of both. The identity porn in this was really well done - Dick is a massive Superman fan, Bruce is unimpressed with both Superman and Clark Kent, and it all goes downhill from there (affectionate). Highlights also include Bruce using a dubiously legal site to crossreference soulmarks, him getting the Superman crest tattooed on his wrist using Kyrptonian tech, and Clark being a self-sacrificing idiot. This is also one of the best soulmate AUs I've ever read!!

Identity Porn

1. Get Over It by rotasha; rated T; no archive warnings apply; 32,378 words; 3 chapters; complete

Summary:

Bruce needs to get over his inconvenient feelings for Superman and he meets an attractive reporter who he thinks can help him do just that. Little does he know...

Of all the identity porn I've read, this is one of the best! Bruce dating Clark to get over Superman is one of the best things ever and this fic really does a good job of their dynamic!

2. Lost Time Without You by rotasha; rated T; no archive warnings apply; 68,792 words; 21 chapters; complete

Summary:

In a universe where your soulmate’s injuries show up on your skin, Bruce is convinced he doesn’t have a soulmate, and Clark is seriously concerned for his soulmate’s well-being.

This was my introduction to soulmate!AUs and oh my goodness it was spectacular! The build up to the reveal of their identities was brilliantly done, and the chance encounters that pepper through the lead up to that point were captivating. This fic also features Bruce being a good parent and I really love that for him

3. the cost of being a good dad by Mawiiish [@superbattrash on tumblr]; rated T; creator chose not to use archive warnings; 95,533 words; 10 chapters; complete

Summary:

Dick, Jason, Tim and Damian are all tired of watching Bruce struggle with the stress of trying to handle the newly formed Justice League. He needs an outlet, he needs to relax, he needs to get out of the house, he needs... he needs to start dating. And what he doesn't know won't hurt him, right?

--

“Excuse me, I don’t know who you think I am, but I think there’s been a mistake.”

“Bruce, right?” the guy says, albeit less confidently this time. He looks slightly concerned and if Bruce is not mistaken… a tad embarrassed. “Bruce Wayne? You look just like your pictures.”

“My pictures?” Something finally clicks in Bruce’s mind, and he takes a small step back and plasters a smile on his face as to not rouse suspicion. Stalker. “Ah, of course, I’m sorry but I’m late for an appointment.”

This fic features the batkids catfishing Clark on Bruce's behalf, Bruce being a good parent, and the utter chaos of miscommunication that can only come from these two being idiots! It was a delightful read, and of course the batfam in action is always a joy!

4. ship-to-ship combat by pomeloquat; rated M; no archive warnings apply; 62,737 words; 12/13 chapters; incomplete

Summary:

"Clark. What the hell is this," Lois asks, staring at Clark's Bruceman WIP folder. Clark's first instinct is to fly away, but that would still leave his fic on display for her to see. His second instinct is to blast a hole straight through his laptop screen with his heat vision, which isn't much better.

Clark, in an attempt to make some spare cash, unintentionally stumbles into the world of superhero fanfiction, becomes a prolific writer for Gotham's OTP, and tries his best to fend off rival fans who want him to convert to superbat instead.

Oh my goodness okay. Where to start with this fic. First of all, Clark writing Batman/Bruce Wayne fanfiction is such a brilliant concept. Then add to that the fact that Clark is secretly crushing on Batman at the same time, and the entire comedy of a trainwreck is a delight to witness!

5. I'm Not As Think As You Drunk I Am by Mardiaz173; rated T; no archive warnings apply; 12,920 words; 3 chapters; complete

It was like living in the Twilight Zone. Everyone else believed fervently in Bruce Wayne’s reputation. He was a flirty, stupid, and entitled drunk whose only redeeming quality was his bleeding heart. And yet every time Clark spoke with Wayne, the man was clever, mischievous, and sober with an indecipherable ulterior motive.

And no one believed Clark. Not Lois, not his parents, not even Batman.

Clark insisting upon defending Bruce to everyone much to everyone's dismay is one of my favourite superbat tropes ever, and this fic really does it well! And of course, this fic also features Batman shit talking Bruce, which is always a joy to see!

6. Don't Quote Me by metropolisjournal [@metropolisjournal on tumblr]; rated E; no archive warnings apply; 77,131 words; 20/21 chapters; incomplete

Summary:

Bruce Wayne has weathered scandal before, and Wayne Enterprises can handle another publicity crisis. What Bruce can’t handle is one crashing up against his plans to infiltrate Lex’s estate. Set during Batman v. Superman.

This was the fix-it for Batman vs Superman that I didn't know I needed until I read it. The identity reveal was so incredibly well written, and the whole fic was stupendous from the very first chapter!

And that's all for now! I hope you find something in here to read, may you enjoy!!

[cressidagrey]

AO3 Masterlist

All of these link to my AO3, mostly because that's my personal favorite site to read fan fiction on, and it's much easier to make multiple stories into a series!

Unless otherwise noted, all my series/stories are ongoing, which means…if you have a prompt for any of them, shoot them my way. 

The Court of Gold and Shadows*

you'll be made of ashes too

Elain Archeron makes the most beautiful bride.

Azriel copes.

for the first time, what's past is past

Of all the ways, Azriel expected to meet his mate, this wasn't it. 

something good and right and real

Azriel had spent centuries believing that he of all people didn't deserve a mate. And if anything, the last three years had just galvinised that particular belief. And then he meets her.

The first time Oriana met Azriel, she thought that he reminded her of a skittish cat. Shy and a little bit broken. Good for him that she absolutely excelled in fixing the things around her.

Romance is not dead if you keep it just yours

5 Times Cassian thought that Azriel had feelings for somebody and then the 1 time he finally met the girl his brother was in love with. 

I breathe flames each time I talk

The story of how Oriana Fireborn Belmont, Third Daughter of the First Daughter, met her mate's family.

Also the story of how Rhysand, High Lord of the Night Court finally recognises that by the cauldron, there is no fury like that of a female scorned.

Meanwhile, Azriel would just like everybody to get along.

The Unexpected Series*

“If you need to fuck someone, go to a pleasure hall and pay for it, but stay away from her.”

What if… Azriel actually takes Rhys at his word? And does exactly what his High Lord ordered? With unexpected consequences.

Unafraid

Azriel does exactly what his High Lord ordered him to do. (Well, kinda.)

Unprecedented

This is Azriel finding out about said unexpected consequences

Unknowing

This is the Inner Circle finding out about said consequences. Azriel is very good at keeping secrets

Indelible*

Indelible Scars

Azriel knew pain. So did Galena.

Also known as: Azriel’s mate is a healer and the first time they meet, he nearly dies on her.

Glorious Sunrise

So what happens after the mating bond snaps?

Well-meaning interfering family members, deep conversations and nights spent brooding on the roof like some kind of gargoyle…this one has it all.

(The Smutty Sequel y’all asked for ;) )

A Pocketful of Stars*

New Pursuits

The shadows decide that Azriel needs a hobby.

5 times when said hobby-related shenanigans didn’t end so well…and the one time where it may end up better than Azriel could ever have imagined.

Welcome to the World 

The quickest turnaround time between finding your mate and having a kid anybody in the history of Prythian has ever managed

The Starlight Princess*

The Starlight Princess

There is a Pool of Starlight in the Spring Court. A piece of the Night Court that has no business being in the land of Eternal Spring. So how did it come to be?

Or: How the Spymaster of the Night Court starts hearing a voice, realises that no, he is not insane after all, frees a princess, kills a High Lord…and finds his mate all at the same time.

The Prophecy

Lightning in a Bottle

Eira Archeron was neither a Valkyrie, nor a Seer, nor the High Lady of the Night Court. She was actually pretty much useless. The only thing she wanted was to be somebody's first choice for once in her life.

Also known as: Azriel's shadows decide that if he doesn't treat his mate right... they'll just do it for him.

Looked to the Sky

Eira Archeron was neither a Valkyrie, nor a Seer, nor the High Lady of the Night Court. She was, however, Azriel‘s mate with her own mysterious, untrained powers.

Also known as: Azriel tries to court his mate the human way.

Recipe for Love

Peach Cobbler

Azriel finds a bakery and creates his very own reward system.

Honey Cakes

The Beehive Bakery is out of Peach Cobbler. This leads Azriel to make some very impulsive decisions. 

Don't wait for the Sky to Clear

The Fourth Archeron sister makes herself a life in the Dawn Court.

dust of your highest hopes

Eavesdroppers never hear anything good about themselves, goes the idiom.

When Solana hears an admission from the High Lord of Day, she’s ill-prepared for it. She doesn’t believe in fairytales any longer, but maybe there was a happily ever after for Solana and Helion somewhere

The Ties that Bind

Shadowsingers were made, not born. Made out of trauma and loneliness and desperation.

So when Cilla and Azriel meet and their shadows entwine, they both meet the only other person that could understand these particular childhood scars.

The last thing Azriel had ever expected from his mate, however, was for her to have a surprising connection to his brother.

The Witching Hour

5 Times members of the Inner Circle get absolutely terrified by Azriel's...whatever she is, and 1 (of many) times Azriel thinks that his witch was the best thing that ever happened to him.

Bound by Blood

Azriel's witch has some very smutty plans for Samhain.

Tear the World Apart

Eris’ mate decides to get rid of her father-in-law. Also known as: If Eris Vanserra married a very bloodthirsty Margaery Tyrell.

Brighten Up the Sky

A Mating Bond between her younger sister and the Night Court’s shadowsinger was the last thing Feyre had expected to spring up…but then, maybe it did make sense.

Stars all aligned

If there was one thing that both Azriel and Zahra Archeron had in common, it was that they were both very good at blending into the background.

(Super pretty dividers thanks to @tsunami-of-tears !)

[ananke-xiii]

ah yes, of course I have more to say. This time it's not about a specific comparison/trope, more about how angels are perceived by viewers (but also partly by writers, too, tbh).

anything about angels being ethereal and divine etc: I think sometimes the non-in-universe view warps what's canon when it comes to angels. For instance, the way we the audience commonly perceive angels sort of interferes with the in-universe depiction of said creatures. Like, maybe we see angels as ethereal, celestial, incomprehensible figures but in SPN they're anything but. We can very much understand their motives, their feelings and what their agenda is. It's totally not beyond human comprehension, as amatter of fact, it's very much human but it's also NOT human at the same time because angels don't have the same morality as humans do and their notion of "good" and "evil" is quite peculiar, if they even have one. This is also why the "halo and a harp" joke is thrown around quite a few times as a reminder that SPN angels are not "our" angels.

The same misrepresentation happens when it's about angels and love (and sex). It's pretty clear that in SPN (hashtag not all but many) angels are actually very, very, very much interested in sex and love. I'll concede that they tend to confuse obsession for love and that there's a lot of repression/suppression/sublimation/you name it going on in that department but, frankly, it's not something so inherently alien that humans can't relate to.

Anyhow, I don't think it's only the audience's fault, though, as I see SPN writers implicitly inserting their own personal view into the story as well. For example, the idea that Lucifer is the "primary agent of evil" in s14 after we've spent a whole season dealing with how God has traumatized and abused both his own sister and his own "son" and how said sister has, in return, abused and traumatized Lucifer doesn't exactly hold up. I mean, if there must be one primary agent of evil in SPN everything seemed to point to Chuck well before s14's big "reveal". Moreover, from their first appearance in S4 angels have perhaps wreaked havoc more than demons and other monsters combined. Lucifer is admittedly a big problem (among other things because he is an abuser and a general piece of shit) but he's not the only problem in paradise (lol).

Related to the first point, how Dean's in awe with Cas because he's a celestial being etc: this is something that I read in a lot of fics so it's just both my own personal taste and my fic preferences (I like when fics stick to canon as far as possible because I like to see how different minds might have developed a particular storyline) that differ from others and that's fine, to each their own. The thing is, I don't really see it. Maybe S3-4 Sam was more in awe with the idea of angels but after Lucifer I don't think the guy's particularly moved by them. As far as Dean's concerned, I actually see him hating on angels the most. Vampires can be okay, werewolves maybe, he's surprisingly okay with demons as well, but angels? He doesn't like them at all. And I mean this, this is actually interesting because out of all the creatures in the world he hates (and who have hurt him and his family) he ends up getting a best friend/consort who belongs to that particular flavor he just can't tolerate and who probably hurt him and his family the most ("Angels are just monsters with good PR"). As in: Dean finds Cas amazing because he's Cas, not because he's an angel but he IS an angel nevertheless and that alone causes some problems. It makes for a very interesting moral dilemma and an engaging angle to explore where a good chunk of their issues stems from.

[rai-chuuuu]

helloo can i request Boyfriend Things with Nct127 members<3 thanks

╰┈➤ nct (127) boyfriend things !

boyfriend things... (0.7k words)

pairing ; every member x gn!reader

warnings ; I dont even know????

TO THE PERSON THAT REQUESTED JAEHYUN AND FOOTBALL PLAYING Y/N, I AM SO SORRY FOR THE WAIT. I'M NOT TRYING TO AVOID THE REQUEST BUT I'M SO STUMPED ABOUT IT 😭

Taeyong - If there’s one thing you should know about Taeyong, it’s that he tries to spend tons of time with you. Even if his schedule is almost full, he gives his best effort. After long days, expect to do some stuff like play games, have a movie marathon, or even go shopping. When it comes to little things, it depends on the weather. When it’s sunny outside, Taeyong will take you out to enjoy the sun and how it feels. On the contrary, he loves staying inside and napping with you when it’s raining or snowing.

Johnny - Despite Johnny helping almost everyone he knows, he helps you out the most. His aid ranges from assistance with getting something to kind words and affirmations. It comes from a state of care. He makes sure to take care of you and treats you like a prized possession. No matter how sweet that is, there’s a downside. When going out to an amusement park, Johnny always drags you along on drop-off rides. Whether or not you’re scared of heights, it’s something you should prepare for.

Yuta - Something sweet Yuta does is rest on you. Because he doesn’t use a pillow, there are times when he prefers lying on you for comfort reasons. It’s extremely cute, but he always manages to wake you up since he wakes up earlier. You should always expect to be out a ton on off days, mainly due to disliking staying inside. You always have fun with Yuta, so that’s what really matters. 

Doyoung - Similarly to Taeil, Doyoung has a good memory, so he knows exactly what to get you every single time. If you said you enjoyed a certain dish or outfit, it’s something that he’ll give you, even if it’s years later. It’s extremely impressive and always such a surprise to you. On a good day, you’ll catch Doyoung in the kitchen baking a treat for the both of you. He has to put that baking talent somewhere, you know. 

Jaehyun - Jaehyun enjoys taking care of you more than—almost—anything. It doesn't really matter what he does in particular, but it’s always nice to be treated nicely. Honestly, the only bad thing about Jaehyun is that he’d brag about a lot of things, although they're not even that serious. It’s really him trying to show off to impress you, which is pretty sweet. Whenever this happens, he seems to get a bit embarrassed after it. You can always tell when his ears get red.

Jungwoo - He gets you all kinds of Snoopy-related items solely to remind you of him. Jungwoo has given you accessories, kitchen sets, and so much more that is just... Snoopy. You don’t know if he mainly does this to you or if it’s normal, but there’s not much of a complaint. Jungwoo would try to scare you with his imitation skills, which work a lot more than they really should. Sometimes you know it’s him doing it, but it’s the fact that you don't expect it that gets to you.

Mark - For someone who mainly takes out the trash and helps with laundry when it comes to the group, Mark is weirdly insistent on helping you with chores. You could be doing the dishes, and he’ll ask if you need help, but he will still do them if you say no. The only “bad” thing he would do is offer to take you out to get something you want, then take you to a totally different spot to eat his favorite food with him. It’s not the worst, but it is a bit odd.

Haechan - Haechan likes to keep the place clean, which is always handy when you don’t actually feel like doing anything. He likes to tidy up with music, which is always a nice touch. There’s just something about him that makes me want to believe he would torture you in the weirdest ways, like making you watch his dancing without music, which is oddly uncomfortable. There isn’t a reason for this. It just happens. Haechan would probably eat your food but say that you “just forgot you already ate it” to get away with it.

[lavendersugarplum]

Why Ben’s Death Was Important.

These two TUA characters could've died earlier, and I would not care.

Now that The Umbrella Academy has come to an end with Season 4, I feel like it's the perfect time to share some of my thoughts on the characters, and one in particular—Jennifer. If Jennifer had been killed off at any point during the season, it honestly wouldn't have affected me in the slightest. I just couldn't bring myself to care about her character. Jennifer's presence throughout the series has been minimal at best; she's barely had any screen time or development, making it hard to connect with or invest in her story. In many ways, she felt like a character who was simply there to serve the needs of the plot, rather than someone we were meant to root for or even understand on a deeper level.

The show could have handled her just as they did with Harlan—abruptly writing her out without much of a send-off. Harlan, who was once an important character, was discarded with little fanfare when his role no longer fit into the narrative. But because Jennifer is more closely tied to the central plot and Sparrow Ben's storyline, the writers clearly felt she was too important to be cut off so easily. Despite her being integral to certain plot points, it felt like her character never truly got the attention or development needed to make her compelling. So, while her survival made sense for the overall narrative, it didn't do much to make her any more memorable or likable to me as a viewer. If they had killed her off from the start, then the show would basically be over. Happy Ending for everyone....except her.

Another character I would have had zero qualms about losing is Sparrow Ben. Especially him. I HATE this character with a passion. No one can ever replace Umbrella Ben in my eyes; he will always be the best Ben, the only valid Ben, and the one who truly mattered. Sparrow Ben, on the other hand, is an entirely different story. I wouldn't give two flying fucks if something terrible happened to him. 😭 From the moment he appeared on screen, it was clear that his character was meant to be unlikable—arrogant, self-centered, and constantly at odds with everyone around him. And while it seemed like the writers tried to soften him up in late end of Season 3, hoping to make him more sympathetic or relatable, it just didn't work for me. Any attempts to redeem Sparrow Ben fell flat, and he remained just as obnoxious as ever.

Frankly, I'm convinced that the only reason the Umbrellas kept him around was because he looked like their beloved Umbrella Ben. If it were up to me, I'd have left his ass somewhere along the way, probably "accidentally" letting him get swallowed up by the Kugelblitz or one of the many other apocalyptic threats they faced. The Umbrellas' insistence on keeping him around felt misguided; he's not their Ben, and he's made it painfully clear he doesn't want to be part of their found family. I kept thinking, "Just let him go! He's not your brother!" The whole dynamic was forced and uncomfortable, and it's hard not to blame him for a lot of what went wrong this season. The group's willingness to cling to this hollow version of their lost sibling only made things worse.

Because let's be real, most of the things in Season 4 can be traced back to Sparrow Ben's actions or his selfish decisions. If they had just left him behind earlier on, half the disasters they faced might never have happened. The Umbrellas should have cut their losses instead of trying to see something redeemable in a character who had no interest in being part of their story. To me, the only decent Sparrows were Sloane and Marcus—characters who, unlike Sparrow Ben, showed some sense of loyalty, vulnerability, and a willingness to grow. Sparrow Ben was just dead weight, a constant reminder of what the Umbrellas lost, without offering anything meaningful in return. He is a prime example to show how none of the Umbrella's are willing to just let go of some things and move on.

The entire series of The Umbrella Academy revolves around one central theme: the siblings' refusal to let go of the past and accept things as they are. They're constantly clinging to old traumas, memories, and regrets, unable to move forward. This is why Sparrow Ben's antagonistic personality is in a way important to the storyline. If he had been as loving, kind, and brotherly as Umbrella Ben, his role as the catalyst for the Umbrellas' downfall would have made no sense. Sparrow Ben's cold and selfish nature was a direct contrast to what the Umbrellas once had, highlighting just how much they were still trapped in the past, desperately trying to hold onto something that was long gone. So even though a lot of us might absolutely loathe this character, he role was a reminder that you can't recreate what you've lost, no matter how hard you try, and this refusal to accept that truth is what ultimately led the siblings down a destructive path.

Rewatching the series with this context makes Umbrella Ben's death feel even more important. On its own, his death is a heartbreaking and tragic moment, a sudden loss of a beloved character. But when viewed within the entire narrative arc of the series, it transforms from a purely sad event into something more complex—almost a bittersweet relief. I believe now that Ben's death was a subtle foreshadowing of how the story would ultimately end. It was a powerful hint at the series' overarching message about the necessity of letting go. Ben's journey was a microcosm of what every character needed to learn but often resisted—the painful but necessary act of moving on.

Ben was the first sibling to accept his fate, to realize that holding onto people, memories, and pain when it's time to let go is not only unhealthy but self-destructive. His decision to let go wasn't just about moving on from his own death; it was about ending his cycle of self-inflicted suffering. He recognized that by clinging to the past, he was only perpetuating his own misery. His final act of release allowed him to find peace, breaking the cycle and allowing his spirit to finally move forward. This stands in sharp contrast to the rest of the siblings, who repeatedly fall into the same patterns, unable to break free from their own personal demons.

To break the cycle, you must be willing to let go, just as Ben ultimately did.

[witchlingcirce]

I’m so bored rn so I want to overanalyse Cassandra Clare’s recent post about her in Sweden and what that could mean for TWP!!!.

And two quick side notes before we begin: I don’t know a lot about Sweden, so if anyone wants to add onto too any of my points please do!! Or correct me, all is welcome <3!! ALSO, I’m sure 99% of these photos are just nice pictures from her holiday trip :), I am just bored and deciding to look far too into it!!

FIRST OFF IS THIS LAKE, now this one kind of confirmed to have something to do with kit & Ty:

Okay so obviously Kit & Ty need to get past this river, so this leads me to wonder why: either A: there running from someone/something, B: there’s an objective at the end of the lake.

The phrasing of “Could Ty & Kit cross that river” leads me believe that they will probably spend a bit of time figuring out how 👀, my theory is that Kit may use his magic and find a way to have them both cross the river, OR maybe Ty will make something for them to cross the river???

Now onto the bit I feel like I DONT SEE PEOPLE TALKING ABOUT is the “will they survive”. Now maybe there being chased down by something and maybe the thing being chased down Knicks one of them, and they don’t realise until there over lake 👀 or maybe something malfunctions while there going over the lake???

I stated before that maybe Kit uses his powers, and maybe by doing so, he hurts himself… OR HE HURTS TY (the angst…)

Another possibility, which I’m 100% pulling out my ass rn that relies on whatever season Sweden is in during TWP but maybeee the lake is frozen over and while walking on it, one of them falls in and the other has to save them (this trope always remind me of little woman).

I don’t really have any particular theories about said Cabin, but I do believe that it will be in TWP- so I decided to include it!!!

I feel like the cabin will definitely have some veryyyy romantic moments idk, I mean… a blackthorn loves a good cabin *cough* mark *cough* Julian *cough*

I have a feeling we will see some fun tropes play out in said cabin, one I’ve seen before is the “one bed trope” which I love, and can see happening !! I can imagine maybe some personal moments between the two, talking about certain things ie: what’s happened over the last three years (again this depends on when this takes place during the story)

I also have a feeling that the cabin may be near the lake, so I feel like this kind of relates to my above points!!!

Now… THIS!! I don’t actually know what kind of building this is, so I will not comment on that or anything as such… but the architecture is SO COOL

I feel like this would probably be a destination where they meet someone. Maybe a warlock and or Faerie. The sticks around the structure itself kind of gives me fae vibes, so maybe mother Hawthorne??? Or a new character haven’t seen… but it’s soooo cool and the fog makes it ohhh soooo mysterious

And on a final, and more happy note…. What if Kit & Ty go on a waterfall date :,()

[whatthebodygraspsnot]

Do you still think you’d share how to comment on explicit fics? 👉🏻👈���� I just think that would be so great and helpful! Either way, I love the way you write so much!

ah yeah! okay Disclaimer: this is not universal or exhaustive and no one has to do any of this shit at all if it's not their vibe. this is just what i found works for me when im leaving a comment, and also the kinds of things i eat up with a spoon when other people comment on my stuff.

it can feel a little iffy and vulnerable sometimes when you're trying to comment on explicit fic, especially if it's extra juicy and especially if the author is someone you might not interact with. so i'm gonna break this up into two categories. Commenting On SFW But Still Sexy Aspects, and Commenting on NSFW Aspects. then i'll break down some options and give examples :) you can pick and choose however many works for you on a fic-to-fic basis.

SFW But Still Sexy Aspects

Character Behavior Changes - Example: i find it so interesting how A starts out so cocky and like he's about to lead everything, and then the second B starts touching him, he gets all nervous.

Setting/Atmosphere - Example: the fact that this is all happening in an alleyway adds to the grittiness in such an effective way - i love it! - Example: you described the mansion's details so well that i felt like i was there having a drink with them, watching them make eyes at each other! super hot!

Juicy Plot Points/Motivations - Example: knowing there's years of sexual tension between them makes this so yummy to read. glad you included the buildup! i was reading as fast as i could so i could get to the satisfaction of them finally getting together <3 and you did not disappoint!

Pointing Out Callbacks To Previous Chapters (If Chaptered) - Example: "line copy/pasted from this chapter" ah! okay i guess there was a reason for him doing XYZ in the last chapter lol - Example: i love that we're here now. i never would have guessed this would be happening between them when i started reading but damn does it feel so good.

NSFW Aspects

Pro Tip: use quotes from the fic! it helps you! it shows the author exact parts that worked! it's fun for everyone :D

Dialogue - Example: "dialogue copy/pasted from fic" oh my god i can hear this in their voice so clearly! - Example: "dialogue copy/pasted from fic" okay tbh i never thought i'd hear them say something like this, but the way you framed it and built up to it works so well! - Example: "dialogue copy/pasted from fic" this would've worked on me too tbh

A Particular Move/Position - Example (mild): B flipping A over and taking control was soooo hot - Example (medium): B going down on A was so hot - i love how into it they both were - Example (hot): B going down on A was so hot - i love how A couldn't help but cum so quickly with how nasty B was being <3

Anything That Got A Physical Reaction Out Of You - Example: "line copy/pasted from fic" wow this made my tummy swoop! - Example: the overall build up in this scene is so good i was sweating! / i'm fanning myself! / omg i need a cold shower lol

Kinks/Tropes - Example: i've never read this kink/trope before but i love your other work so i decided to give it a shot! - Example: i lovvve this kink/trope and you nailed it! especially the parts with XYZ.

Just Kidding Here's A Third Category: Miscellaneous

Excitement About New Fic - Example: omg i saw the notification and came RUNNING - Example: when i read the tags i started sweating. knew immediately that you were going to put me on my ass

Relating Back To Other Works From The Author - Example: This reminds me of your other fic 'Fic Title'! really loved the tension in that one too - i'm glad we get to see some more!

Hit Em With The Ol' Emojis + Gratitude - Example: 🥵🥵🥵 thank you for sharing!

What Happens After You Close The Tab? - Example: i'll be thinking about this one for a long long time wow! - Example: i've been thinking about the last chapter since i read it. this fic has me in a chokehold! - Example: reading this for a second time! just as hot as the first!

in summary, most authors i know cherish comments like you wouldn't fucking believe! so follow your horny little heart and know that they're ecstatic that you took the time to leave one <3

and if all else fails, you can never go wrong with a good copy/paste of a line that you specifically liked + why you liked it!

[sysmedsaresexist]

so this is an honest question because you seem to understand the ToSD really well, and this is something that has always confused us; is there a specific reason for the idea that identity integration can only be interupted by trauma and not a neurological or biological issue?

We ask because we have autism which has affected almost everything about our existence and functioning from how we process information and sensory input, to how we learn, and even how we experience emotions and more complex things like our self perception and gender.

It is confusing to us that all these other things, including identity and perception, can be changed by something biological/neurological, and thats generally accepted to be true but the idea that and extremely long and complex process that also depends on feedback from other people can't be?

We get specific trauma responses and symptoms but the whole "the only way for states not to integrate/integrate fully is trauma in one specific window" seems to make integration one of if not the only processes in the brain that can't be disrupted by neurology and that is confusing to us

This is a good and valid question.

And here's the truth.

We don't know that it's the only way.

However, that conversation is 100% completely separate from structural dissociation.

It's so important to remember that structural dissociation is specifically and solely focused on dissociation in response to trauma.

Nothing else. It can't be compared to anything else.

I'm genuinely not sure how to structure this post, so I'm going to talk about a couple different theories/ideas, in no particular order. Give it a chance and read to the end, where we talk about the flip side.

I think we need to first talk about trauma in relation to developmental and neurological disorders.

As a reminder, trauma is not an event, but a reaction to things around you.

For children with things like autism, ADHD, anxiety, OCD, they're not only at a higher risk of being abused and traumatized, but they're more easily traumatized by a wider range of things. They're the populations most prone to pathological dissociation.

Did you daydream a lot as a kid? Does MaDD kind of hit hard? Did teachers and parents get really mad at you for your dissociation?

I hate to tell you this, but there's a high chance you're traumatized.

And the thing with CPTSD, what is essentially a precursor to DID and (largely considered) to be a dissociative disorder, is that it can be so hard to pinpoint where and how it started. It's a lifetime of papercuts vs a car accident. Do you remember every little cut? The cause can seem invisible.

The leading cause of CPTSD is emotional neglect, something even the most well-intentioned parents can do without ever meaning to. It's called the invisible abuse for a reason.

And emotional neglect happens so much easier when your child has additional needs that are commonly missed and not diagnosed until adulthood, long after the crucial period where they needed the most help.

All that said, we need to talk again about how many of those disorders include dissociation already.

Not only is dissociation common, but things like autism are highly recognized to affect a person's sense of self, specifically in childhood, but now you're getting into "chicken and egg" conversations.

In my own opinion, I would think that if autism alone could result in dissociated identities, we would know that by now. I mean, look at BPD, we know what happens with trauma in childhood that doesn't result in DID. There's an incredible amount of discussion about whether certain cases of BPD are actually sister-versions of OSDD (think OSDD-1c, the less defined alters seen in 1a, plus the lack of amnesia seen in 1b).

All THAT said, we're talking about dissociation and trauma.

This doesn't touch on the way people define and interpret their personal experiences. It seems completely plausible that people could simply just be more in tune with aspects of themselves, and view life through a comfortable, happy lens of multiplicity.

The multiple self theory has been around as long as the ToSD.

And that discussion doesn't necessarily need to be separate from dissociation and trauma, but I think for some it just is.

In every sense of the word, it just... is.

It simply is that way for them.

I firmly believe these two concepts would be 100% separate and different (acknowledging that for some, these can and do overlap, but I'm talking about brain scan level differences)

Unfortunately, words are limited, and there's only one perfect word for both experiences.

"System".

I hope this was some food for thought. I encourage people to get involved in the conversation!

[doctorwenqing]

Chiss Fan Survey 2023

Here's the results of the Chiss fan survey for this year! We had a huge turnout, with 464 responses! Here's a link to the slide deck if that's more accessible for you.

First some demographics: most people surveyed came from Twitter but we also had a pretty good turnout from Tumblr this year!

The majority of people surveyed still came from the United States, but we also had some new countries make it on the map this year.

Most people fell within the 18-34 age range.

As always, I love how Thrawn attracts the autistic audience. Interestingly, the same percentage of people said they’re neurodivergent this year as did last year, but the proportion of them that are autistic grew by about 7%.

Again just a disclaimer that these results are not necessarily representative of the overall Thrawn fan community as I reach a very specific demographic, but over half of the people surveyed are women and almost a third are non-binary. 20% identify as transgender.

About a third of people surveyed are bisexual or pansexual.

Another thing I love is how many people in the community fall under the asexual and aromantic umbrellas. Asexuality is the second most common sexuality reported on this survey.

There’s about 8% fewer single people and 4% more married people than last year so congratulations!

A new question this year is how people's partners feel about Star Wars. For most, it seems they’re the bigger Star Wars fan between them and their partner(s)

Moving on to the actual Thrawn questions, the majority of people surveyed got into Thrawn around 2020.

The spikes on the read/watch order graph show the most popular reading/watch order, so Rebels> Thrawn> Alliances> Treason> Chaos Rising> Greater Good> Lesser Evil> Ahsoka.

Most people had seen Star Wars Rebels and read at least Thrawn (2017).

Over half of people surveyed have read Heir to the Empire, and overall more people report reading Legends than in last year’s survey.

To get the book ranking, I gave each book an average rank based on people's votes and ordered them that way. Thrawn 2017 was by far the most popular of the books.

The most popular choice for a new book book was an "Eli Vanto in the Ascendancy" book.

Despite Ahsoka filling in what happened after Rebels, the percentage of people who are interested in a Thrawn and Ezra Post-Rebels story has not decreased and has in fact increased slightly.

The love for Thranto is very apparent in the ship portion of the survey.

There’s also a good percentage of people who don’t ship Thrawn with anyone, and then OC or selfships are also somewhat popular.

I included a reminder as to what the Thrawn Designs options were. Ascendancy Thrawn was far and away the most popular design for Thrawn. People also liked the 2018 comic version. Least popular was the Heir to the Empire comic design.

Despite what people may have expected, overall Chiss fans were happy with Live Action Thrawn.

In particular, they liked the casting and the dialogue. The most disliked bits were Thrawn’s storyline and inconsistencies with the books.

I also need it to be noted that more than one person wrote in that they liked “how cunty" live action Thrawn was.

Thrawn fans get involved in several different ways

Almost a third have made Thrawn art and 40% wrote something.

Several people went to the Chiss fan meetup this year.

60% of people bought something Thrawn related.

Books was the top item purchased, with over half of people who bought something buying at least one book and most buying several books.

Comics were also popular with the reprinting of the 2018 comic.

Please let me know if you have any questions or would like me to cross-analyze anything!

[nburkhardt]

Other Parts: One, Two, Three, Four.

(Small trigger warning for overdose, not completely accurate I don’t think but still gonna warn) NOW, onto the fic! ~

The Plan? That’s fucking boring

Eddie Munson’s Way of Making the Sun Shine Brighter?

The End of Michael Wheeler?

Eddie’s Totally Put Together Plan? What a stupid fucking stupid title!!

(Title is still a work in progress)

Self reminder: do not in any way, say the word ‘asshole’ within hearing range of Steve. ALSO do not use any references to royalty or anything relating to being dumb.

Step 1:

Find out the reason why Michael Wheeler decided to be a total dickwad and call Steve an asshole. Yelling really comes out if it’s a dumb fucking reason.

Step 2:

Let the brats know that they are to stay away from Steve for at least a week to think about why he reacted the way he did. Don’t mention the breakdown, only say what is necessary.

Let Steve know about this part (double underlined)

Step 3:

Corner Dustin Henderson and Robin Buckley separately. Find out why they weren’t too concerned for their supposed best friend.

Hint to them what’s going on?

Step 4: most important

Comfort Steve !!!! Make sure he knows you’re in this for the long haul. Make it known you are not leaving him.

Help him open up a tiny bit more. Do not overwhelm him!!

Step 5: necessary for step 4

Hand holding, nicknames and reminders. Maybe cuddles ONLY if he’s up to it!!

Step 6: Step 2.0: (written over with a line harshly up the page connecting to step 2)

Shut up anyone who even dares to say The Word to Steve. Teach self to not say it anymore. Give a crash course to everyone in Hellfire that they were unknowingly being bullies. This step be after step 1? Maybe step 2?

~

Eddie glanced at his notebook and smiled. All morning he’s been writing out this plan. It wasn’t settling in his head whatsoever with his overactive hyper way of thinking, it was never going to come together.

He woke up only after a few hours of actual sleeping, he tossed and turned with images of a heartbroken Steve flashing in his dreams. At one point he jolted awake when a particular flash included Steve just silent and emotionless, like he wasn’t there anymore but he was breathing and that was absolutely terrifying.

Eddie has seen something similar like that look before and it wasn’t pretty either….

—

A recently turned twelve year old Eddie is frozen in the doorway. His face is pale, near white as he stared at his mom.

Charlotte Munson is slumped on the couch, nearly no emotion on her face. Her eyes glazed over, only half way open. Her mouth is parted in a dazed smile, the usual warmth in her face is completely and utterly gone.

Her hand is clutching a tiny bottle and there’s a bottle of vodka on the table.

Even in his frozen state, it doesn’t take long for him to figure out what is happening. Her chest is slow, he can tell she’s breathing. Only just enough but the glaze in her eyes isn’t clearing up; her eyes are actually slipping shut more.

He doesn’t know how long he stands there, doesn’t know how long she’s been there either.

Eventually, someone knocks and breaks the spell.

He’s told later on that she overdosed, but he already figured that out. He watched it happen. Two weeks later he’s shipped off to Uncle Wayne’s, promised to be cared for and he makes a silent vow to never take too much or to mix anything, ever.

—

Shaking his head out of the memory, he looks at the paper again before jumping out of bed to get dressed.

He doesn’t understand or know why his brain decided to be so fucked up and marge the images of his mom and Steve together, but he was jolted awake by it and has stayed awake since.

Now that his plan is laid out on paper for him to visibly see, he feels more confident in this. Before all his head could come up with was ‘Protect Steve’ flashing around as if it was a neon sign.

Grinning to himself, he grabs his notebook and his pencil plus a highlighter. Erasing the crossed out titles before writing down:

Sunshine Protection Squad (he also drew a tiny sun next to it)

It’s not exactly a good title for what this is, but it’s actually the perfect title. Simply because it’s what he is now. He is Steve’s protector and hopefully, for as long as possible. He’ll wear it with pride and scream it from the rooftops if Steve would like that, maybe get a tattoo imagery of it; he’ll remember to ask before doing such.

Steve has always been the protector and never the one being protected. It’ll be a change for him and Eddie knows this, but he’s ready for the challenge to prove it.

To prove that Steve is worth protecting. Even if it’s against his own friends.

~~

I'm going to end it there, i think the stopping point is pretty good. Plus it means I can switch either back to Steve or get into the party. I had a blast coming up with the writing of Eddie's plan. It would be even better if tumblr allowed underlining in the text. (wrote most of this in my notes app and it looks so dumb and perfect lmao) btw if anyone has any tips on how to write any of the party members please send them my way!

taglist: @zerokrox-blog, @piningapple, @i-wanna-combust, @stevecarrington, @henderdads, @fiore-della-valle, @eddiemunsonswife, @mixsethaddams, @momotonescreaming, @ajamlessbaby, @novelnovella, @flustratedcas, @thelastwalkingsoul, @hellfire1986baby, @manda-panda-monium, @xo-blairej, @freyaforestafay, @princessstevemunson, @lifeisnotsobadonceyoustopcaring, @sapphirecobalt-1, @stevesworldxx, @jonathanbyersbbg, @fromapayphone, @anzelsilver, @adaed5, @koyislosinghismind, @idontgetpaidenoughforthisshit, @bornonthesavage, @seths-rogens, @xwildangel, @mightbeasleep, @y0urnewstepp4r3nt,

@saphhicwitchbitch, @m-chmcl-rmnc, @swimmingbirdrunningrock, @steddieassheg0es, @didntwant2come, @itsfreakingbats, @stranger-poets-society,

[ineedtorantaboutjiangcheng]

My first rant, and the reason I snapped and made this blog, is not about Jiang Cheng. It's actually about the characters around him.

See, I was reading this fic and, without naming any specifics, I was enjoying it. Nothing especially groundbreaking, but it was good enough that I was immersed. In fact, the thing that probably got me about this is that what I liked most about the fic, what was really sucked me in, was the characterisations. Wei Wuxian was the definite standout. Fic premise meant that he was injured, but he was being portrayed with his canonical resilience, which is rare enough that prior to this, I would have likely celebrated the fic for it's accuracy. It's a difficult thing to pull off, and I always give extra credit to authors who can walk the line of, essentially, whumping a character while still keeping them themselves.

Then it happened. Jiang Cheng showed up. I've sometimes clicked out of a fic just for that (the timing of his appearance is, occasionally, enough of an indicator of his role in the story that I know I'm not going to be able to jive with it), but I was immersed! And the author had gained my trust with the aforementioned character accuracy until that point! I was caught up, and ready to roll with whatever version of Jiang Cheng came out.

And, well, his behaviour seemed somewhat accurate to canon. Angry, accusatory, sort of irrational, in an overly suspicious way. Seemed pretty good. Again, the timing made me think that the fic was probably going to go the reconciliation path, but you know, I can get through that. I don't care enough about Jiang Cheng that his presence or absence alone is enough to ruin a fic I'm otherwise enjoying.

But then, imagine my shock. Jiang Cheng, post first siege (where, as far as everyone knows, he killed Wei Wuxian, and has spent the years since his death hunting down and torturing anyone who might be/reminds him of him. You can dispute Jiang Cheng's actions, if you wish, but not that this is how he is widely perceived), demands to see Wei Wuxian. And Lan Wangji, who loves Wei Wuxian, who spent stars knows how much time desperately trying to protect Wei Wuxian, who would stand between Wei Wuxian and the world if he had been allowed, just... agrees.

Lan Wangji. Agreed. To let a Jiang Cheng, who shows no, I don't know, remorse, or concern, or anything, toward a person he is credited with murdering, that Lan Wangji believes he murdered. And Lan Wangji just... yep. I'll just take you to see Wei Wuxian. Sure, he's injured, and vulnerable, and you show no sign of wanting to do anything other than a violence. Yep, right this way.

And THIS. THIS is why Jiang Cheng infuriates me. This is why I had to make this blog. Because I don't care about Jiang Cheng, love him, hate him, think he's the most evil scum imaginable, think he's the true victim of mdzs, I literally don't care. I don't have enough investment in the character to give a fuck about how accurate he is.

But I love Lan Wangji. I really do (and Wei Wuxian, and Wen Ning, and Wen Qing, and Jin Ling, and every other character even peripherally related to Jiang Cheng). So to see the characters I do care about being warped and twisted, just to try and force a particular narrative to play out about this one character? I've spent the past idk two hours as I set this up frothing with rage.

It's not like he's the main character of this fic. He's one of the last ones listed (after characters that are actually deceased throughout the entirety of the fic), and there's no, idk, Yunmeng siblings or reconciliation tag or anything. Full confession, I haven't finished the fic, but I'm well over halfway through, so I can somewhat confidently say that his presence, while maybe playing into something in the endgame, is not super critical.

And yet. The author, who until that point had been pretty good with their characterisations, felt the need to overlook one of the main characters primary personality traits (Lan Wangji's desire to protect people and keep safe that which he loves) in order to... make it slightly easier for Jiang Cheng to be shoehorned into the plot? Why? Just... why?

I'm frustrated. Frustrated, and confused. Is it lack of imagination? Could the author not think of a single other way Jiang Cheng might come into contact with Wei Wuxian after the first siege (assuming, of course, that he is alive)? I don't believe that, the author did well enough with thinking up some left field plot points at other stages of the fic. Did they overlook the fact that, Jiang Cheng having demanded Lan Wangji take him to Wei Wuxian, Lan Wangji could have just... not done that? Lan Wangji, Mr. You Are Not Qualified To Talk To Me, had no choice but to acquiesce to Jiang Cheng's will. He couldn't have just. refused. Or walked away from the conversation. Knocked him out and left. Or called out the inherent contradiction of Jiang Cheng wanting to visit someone he killed (again, regardless of your opinion on Jiang Cheng's culpability, it is made clear in canon that that is the version of events Lan Wangji knows/believes). Or at the very least placed conditions on Jiang Cheng that he's not allowed to do anything to harm Wei Wuxian.

But nope! In the space of a single scene, just by his very presence, apparently, Jiang Cheng is able to turn a fully fledged, well characterised version of Lan Wangji into a robot that cannot disobey a human's will due to it's programming.

And it may seem like I'm ragging on this poor author, or that I'm getting too worked up over one scene, and, and, yeah, that would... that would be correct (hence I'm trying to avoid saying anything identifying about the fic, though I realise that might lessen the impact of my arguments). But the thing is, it's not just this fic. Or just this author.

It's everywhere.

I cannot count the number of fics that have characters that otherwise align pretty well with their canonical selves, only for all that to go out the window the second Jiang Cheng shows up. It's like people can't help themselves. Jiang Cheng appears, and every other character must suddenly become whatever version of themselves makes Jiang Cheng appear most sympathetic/reasonable/well-intentioned. Whatever helps the author make Jiang Cheng be what they want him to be.

Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji definitely get this the worst. Wei Wuxian goes from an intelligent, calculating individual, who excels at reading the situations he's in and figuring out what's going to get him the outcome he wants*, to a reckless idiot who charges in without thinking because he wants to "be a hero". And Lan Wangji goes from someone who has repeatedly failed to save the ones he loves, and so is appropriately determined to protect them as much as he can (without becoming his father), to someone who thinks he always knows best**, and will happily put someone he loves into a potentially deadly situation because... I don't know. His thinking is pretty much never clearly explained, but I've seen different half-reasons. Sometimes Lan Wangji just thinks that Wei Wuxian and Jiang Cheng are such good, good brothers, and that Jiang Cheng is so important to Wei Wuxian that the chance to hold a conversation with him is worth Wei Wuxian... best case scenario, being verbally abused, worst case, being tortured to death. Sometimes he thinks he wouldn't be able to stop Jiang Cheng which... haha. Even Jin Ling, who reflexively defends Jiang Cheng over everything, thinks that Jiang Cheng doesn't stand a chance against Lan Wangji. Sometimes he thinks he shouldn't interfere with someone else's family... even though they aren't related, and Jiang Cheng cannot, under any circumstances, acknowledge Wei Wuxian as anything other than a disciple/servant. Also, Lan Wangji gets involved in everything. That's kind of his thing. You know... going where the chaos is? There's certainly a lot of chaos whenever Jiang Cheng is around...

But really, it's everyone. Wen Ning goes from being so defensive of Wei Wuxian that he breaks a promise and reveals a secret he kept for nearly twenty years just to get Jiang Cheng to stop talking shit, to usually being passively pushed into the back seat, his bond with Wei Wuxian glossed over in favour of the "brothers"***. Wen Qing, a person so devoted to Wei Wuxian that she sacrificed herself and her beloved brother on the off chance that it would mean he wouldn't have to face consequences for Jin Zixuan's death, is suddenly chastising Wei Wuxian for not doing more to smooth over their relationship. Jin Ling goes from creating a diversion so that he can help Wei Wuxian escape Jiang Cheng, despite knowing he would get in trouble for it, to trying to trick them into being in the same room. It's everyone.

Every. Single. Character. Must be changed, must behave in ways antithetical to their personalities and relationships, because it seems that's the only way many people can reconcile with their affection for a character that behaves the way Jiang Cheng does. In order to keep Jiang Cheng even slightly resembling his canonical self (angry. violent. verbally abusive at every possible opportunity), and yet still have him be welcomed and beloved by the other characters, every other character must lose integral parts of themselves. Mo Dao Zu Shi is, in many ways, a surprisingly tightly woven story when you start pulling threads, and if you want that jumper to work like pants, you need to get the scissors and start cutting.

Or at least, I can only assume that's what's happening. I can't fathom any other reason as to why so many fics, that are otherwise fairly true to character, veer so wildly OOC as soon as he appears. And it is so, so many fics. Note: I've read, ballpark, around two thousand mo dao zu shi fics (yes, I have no life. no, why do you ask?), and this happens in a staggering amount of them.

And basically, this is the root of my issue with Jiang Cheng. I don't care how you write him, he can be the most loving, soft, compassionate individual in the world in your fic, it's your fic, you write what you like****, I'm just going to engage less with those parts, because I don't care as much. You can make him greet each sunrise by weeping, and coo over every baby he encounters on the street, and weave blankets for the homeless in his free time. I literally don't care.

What I care about is the changes made to the other characters. That in order to raise Jiang Cheng, other characters must be dragged down. That he must be there, and he must be the secretly misunderstood caring brother, so every character that could challenge that in any way must be changed, by any means necessary, to prevent that.

(But really, do they? It's fanfiction. Can you really think of no way to make Jiang Cheng be the character you want him to be without mutilating everyone else? If you truly feel for him, truly think his actions make sense, truly wish to show how his relationships can be fixed without him altering his own attitude... then shouldn't it be easy enough, to persuade others of this, without turning the cohesive characters around him into a farce?)

* - since I know this is going to get disputed, even if only internally, by someone; the literal second scene involving Jiang Cheng (immediately post dancing-statue attack, Jiang Cheng suspects and wants to test with Zidian) has Wei Wuxian realise he's not going to be able to escape without some proof of innocence (i.e. reading the room, despite the stress of the moment). He then deliberately steps out of cover so Jiang Cheng can hit him, proving he's not possessing Mo Xuanyu, and then, when that's not enough to guarantee his freedom, he recognises that, and plays on Jiang Cheng's ego (and ymmv homophobia) by saying he's not his type, so Jiang Cheng can't take him without losing too much face, which Wei Wuxian knows he won't do, since Jiang Cheng is very concerned with reputation and appearances (after all, that's why he refused to help Wen Qing and Wen Ning, in spite of the debt he owed them). If that doesn't indicate Wei Wuxian is a clever person who thinks things through, I don't know what does.

** - not as worried about this being disputed, but I can see people thinking this so; no, Lan Wangji doesn't think he knows best. He did when he was young (or, at least, thought the rules he lived by were definitive morals), and that's what led to his rigid black-and-white thinking regarding rules and such. Then he got older, and got more experience, and made some mistakes, and realised that different people approach the world differently, and that he needed to be more flexible and meet people halfway if he wanted to be able to help them. See his change in attitude toward mo dao/gui dao.

*** - fic challenge; see how many fics that portray Wei Wuxian and Jiang Cheng as close, loving brothers, and also contain the close, caring, trustful friendship between Wei Wuxian and Wen Ning. It's very, very few. On some level, I think everyone who wants to show Jiang Cheng as #bestbrother knows that, from his actions to his attitude, Wen Ning is what a beloved, caring, bad-reputation-but-is-actually-just-misunderstood baby-brother-figure should be.

**** - at the end of the day, everyone has the right the write whatever they like in their fic. I'm a full supporter and encourager of that. But if you don't make it clear that you are going to write OOC, I reserve the right to feel frustrated when I stumble across it. I would never comment it in the fic itself, Ican't imagine anything more poorly mannered, but I am, apparently, not above vague blogging about it (hopefully vague enough that no one can identify any specific fics).

[newlabournewromantics]

did you guys know tony blair actually wrote supercut by lorde?

this is dedicated to @tonyblairwitchproject thank u for enabling me

the process of putting together a supercut, of rewriting and reimagining an (artificially) positive version of a particular storyline, is eerily similar to what tony blair does in every aspect of his life. this is especially noticeable when it comes to his relationship with gordon though — he rarely goes into detail as to just how ugly their interactions were, and his public statements about why they grew apart are always imbued with soulless language about “professional” and “political” disagreements, rather than any honesty about the deep personal betrayal that was actually going on. plus, whenever tony does express any sense of anguish over the breakdown of the relationship, he’s always incredibly quick to defend his own behaviour (denying granita even happened… what the hell), erasing any responsibility he might bear. he is LITERALLY creating and playing a supercut, one which only has any traction in his own head.

journalists have written about new labour in 1997 being drenched in a certain magic, offering the public something to believe in. “gave” is past tense though, as the tbgb relationship began to deteriorate just months after getting into government, and newlab’s popularity would only dwindle as the years went on.

remember that one clip in the gq alastair campbell interview where tony refused to say he didn’t dream about gordon? yeah i remember it too, isn’t that funny!

two things to say here. one, tony can’t reach for gordon because they are not on speaking terms like whatsoever not even remotely. two, i truly think that tony has repeated his own version of events concerning gordon, both in his head and in public, so many times that he’s come to view them as reality — even if tony did interact with gordon properly, he would only be able to see the version of gordon that he’s created.

1994-2005 (ish), they wanted to reconcile and ease the tensions, but external pressures (teams around them, pressures of the jobs, emotional blockages etc) prevented them from truly fixing anything.

Tthese lyrics give me the impression that the speaker would twist themselves into any shape, fashion themselves into any persona, just to hold the attention of the person these lines are directed at. Very much reminds me of accounts re the 1994 leadership discussions, where it’s said that tony was promising gordon anything and everything to get him to swing behind him, then making similarly wild promises about succession later in government just to keep gordon playing the game. Also, it reminds me of that absolutely fucking awful (positive) rawnsley quote that goes something like “tony would cajole, plead, argue, rail against gordon”, just to get him to talk to him.

in my head, this section relates to his immediate post-pmship period, where he’s taking on international roles left and right to try and recreate the pure magic of newlab (and ultimately failing! lets’s not be dishonest here).

THIS IS THE MOST TONY BLAIR SET OF LINES IN EXISTENCE!!! PAY ATTENTION HERE!!!!!!!

first line relates to the nonsense (very sensible accurate analysis) i was spinning about tony rewriting his and gordon’s history, erasing his own culpability and capacity for TREACHERY! the lines about calling… such an obvious parallel with the infamous three hour phone calls, the “endless circular conversations”, the screaming fits down the telephone line…….

another dreaming reference? more likely than you’d think

this outro, although repeating lines i have already covered is actually very important to cover separately. the way that it just repeats itself, over and over and over and over, until the song finishes is actually incredibly aligned to tony’s mentality when it comes to tbgb. as i said earlier, i truly think that tony has repeated his own narrative regarding the way that he treated gordon — and his responsibility for how their relationship played out — enough times to view it as reality. he is insane and i understand him like nobody else.

[kaigarax]

Summer

Akaza x Reader

Quote: "Fall in love with someone that tells you their secrets."

Akaza sees no use in you as he stares down at you.

You seem to have no use.

There’s no particular special skill you have or an interesting fighting style that you seemed to have developed. You don’t seem to have a particularly keen mind in battle strategy or a high level of knowledge in one specific thing.

You are, for lack of better words, weak.

Practically useless.

But, it’s not Akaza’s place to make judgements on your use. It’s not his place to determine what might happen to you next. To him, it merely feels as though he exists to exist. Spends his days constantly fighting and getting stronger. Endlessly, as if it’s the only way for him to live. Actually, it might just be. He’s always moving on. Always pushing forwards towards something bi-

Something b-

Something?

Something he just can’t name or remember.

But it’s something.

It has to be.

The trees are blowing gently in the evening summer breeze. Akaza would have draped you in a jacket or something but he was really only wearing pants and didn’t have anything sufficient on his person. Demons didn’t feel the shifts in temperature the same way humans did and Akaza personally found the extra layers to be suffocating. He did consider running out to grab something for you but you had gently declined his offer citing that you too were a demon and didn’t need anything extra to keep you warm.

Akaza would have to take your word for it.

Despite the fact that you did look… rather cold.

Perhaps you found the extra layers suffocating as well?

You’re so fragile looking. As if he could walk up to you and snap you in half in only one of his hands. Akaza wonders if a breeze in the wrong direction would send you stumbling over into a mess or if you tumble off into the distance, forever forgotten by this cruel and unrelenting world.

“Has something caught your attention?” You ask gently, your eyes meeting with Akaza’s own.

He feels as if he’s suddenly stuck in place and his ability to speak suddenly alludes him.

The clarity and calmness of your gaze is something Akaza is certain he’s never quite seen before yet simultaneously something nostalgic. Something that reminds him of something he’s long forgotten but years desperately to remember. Or at least something that his heart years to remember. His brain seems eager to push the thoughts away as the pounding sensation only eases up as he turns away from your gaze.

Akaza’s voice is rough and harsh as he responds with a curt, “no.” Secretly, he hopes that he doesn’t offend you too much.

You hum softly in acknowledgement. From Akaza’s peripheral, he can see that you’ve turned your attention back to the darkness ahead of you and lets out a quiet sigh of relief as you do.

The darkness has never been an issue for Akaza. As a demon, the world seems to move slightly differently than it had when he was a human. Actually, he’s not quite sure how he knows that - just that he knows he does. Darkness isn’t as dark. Light isn’t as bright. Movements aren’t as fast and your own aren’t as slow. For you the darkness seems to be more of an issue as your eyes squint as you look off into the distance. From Akaza’s perspective, it looks as if you’re searching for something in the distance. Waiting for something or someone. He thinks that he can relate to that feeling. Feels as though he too is searching for something in the unknown darkness that he can never seem to escape. He wonders if that escape is in pushing himself further and testing the limits of his strength.

It has to be.

It must be.

It must be.

“You remind me of someone I once knew.” You say, your gaze still staring off into the distance.

Akaza huffs gruffly in response.

You remind him of someone too. Send his differently beating heart into a tizzy of unfamiliar and foreign flutters. Push his mental state in different ways that it hadn’t been pushed in before. Make his head pound loudly with an unfamiliar beat.

You tentatively grab a flower that had been growing at your feet, twisting the stem between your fingers methodically, “you don’t remember much from your past, do you?”

Akaza nods.

“Well, I don’t think that’s a bad thing. Or, at least that’s what everyone else has always said to me. What use is there to remembering the past when your life is so different now? What use is being who you were when it will only get in the way of who you are now?” You ramble on in an unfamiliar fashion, “what’s the point of ever remembering pain when the life ahead of you will be filled with so much more.”

You don’t speak much with the others.

Or, at least you don’t speak much in groups.

Rarely ever speak unless spoken to first.

But it’s not as if Akaza ever actually sees you interact with the others one on one. He does wonder but the wonder is only ever a brief passing thought. As if the energy required to think of such things is not something that is easily afforded to him. That it’s not something he should concern himself with at all.

Suddenly, you pluck the flower from the stem which you had been so gently handling earlier.

It’s almost a violent action if you take into account how quick everything seemed to happen.

If you had been quick enough to notice the glaze over your eyes.

Or the twitch of your lips.

And, perhaps if Akaza had been faster, he might’ve seen the-

Instinctively, Akaza takes a step back. He isn’t quite sure why he does it at all. It’s the same reaction one often has when their body senses imminent danger but you’re not dangerous at all… are you? You’re gentle and delicate and soft. Something needing protection. Why else would he be here?

“Scared?” You tease, your voice playful.

Akaza forces himself to look you in the eyes.

They’re quite beautiful as far as eyes go. A conventional attractiveness to them. A look that demands the attention of everyone around them and a brilliance that screams something outside of the ordinary.

The loud baning in his head is back.

That’s annoying.

Much like the Upper Demons, your eyes are engraved with words upon them. It’s an eerie thing to look at, especially on a face like yours. It reminds Akaza more of loss and evokes a feeling of pity rather than the joy and excitement he had felt when he received his own. If that feeling could even be considered joy in the first place. Perhaps accomplishment is a better word for the feeling.

Perhaps not.

“No.” Akaza shakes his head.

You stand up gracefully and glide over until you’re standing directly in front of him. You’re gentle and soft and everything that Akaza expects a woman to be as you push his short hair back and nestle the flower you plucked behind his ear.

You lean down, your eyes meeting with his own.

He wonders if he should look away first.

He won’t.

He doesn’t.

But he does wonder.

Wonder in the same way he always does when you’re around.

“You know, I don’t have any memories of my past either.” You admit, taking a seat on the ground in front of him, “it kind of feels like everything has always been the way it has. The people around me have changed but I can’t seem to remember a moment in my life where I wasn’t like… this.”

Akaza watches you curiously.

“Honestly, I’m a little envious of you. Sure, you’ll spend the entirety of your life living to the whims and not understanding why but you’re spending it doing something that-” You trail off.

His heart does a strange sort of flutter as he thinks about you.

You’re delicate.

Not, of course, to be confused with fragile.

Your brain moves in such intricate and unique ways.

Twisting and turning in a way that is uniquely you. Something that is so similar to the people around you yet so different from anyone that Akaza has and will ever meet. Certain mundane moments. A look into your mind. An intimate feeling almost. Though, Akaza suspects that this is how most things are with the people around you. An intimate moment and thought shared between a half complete sentence that you changed your mind about midway through the conversation. A glimpse into how your mind works.

Akaza feels the hint of a smile crawl up on his face, “you don’t.”

“I don’t.” You admitted.

“You’re different from how I thought you’d be.” Akaza says, his voice much smoother and calmer than it had been before, “different from how I thought you were.”

You mumble something akin to agreement.

Akaza doesn't push for more.

He’s always been the kind of person to take what he can get.

Right?

Well… at least he thinks he is.

He thinks he was?

“You’re quite like the person I thought you’d be,” you declare, “exactly the way everyone else had described and exactly who you claim to be.”

Akaza raises a brow.

“You are exactly as you were in every way I thought you’d be,” you continue, “and different in every way that I couldn’t have imagined.”

The compliment makes his stomach twist in knots.

Or at least, he thinks it’s a compliment.

He’s never been all too good at knowing the difference between a compliment or insult unless it was blatantly obvious.

You hum softly to yourself, “being different is a good thing. It keeps us sane. Keeps us from falling into the mundanities of a predetermined life. Makes everything more interesting than it has ever been before for someone else. I think everyone, in some way, wants to be different from the people around them. Hopes to be different in a way that makes them brilliant.”

Akaza wonders if your hair is soft.

Wonders if he should reach out and push it back.

He doesn’t.

Instead he leans in ever so slightly, but still maintaining a proper distance between you and himself. You smell nice. Like home if Akaza has ever had one to begin with. Or at least this is what he imagines home would smell like if he knew what the word meant. What he wants it to smell like if he ever gets the privilege or chance.

“You wish to be like everyone else, don’t you.” Akaza states.

Your perfectly crafted calm expression falters for a moment and your eyes widen ever so slightly.

Akaza wonders if you’ll lash out at him in anger.

If you’ll attempt to convince him otherwise.

Or if you’ll simply accept the outcome of the situation as it is.

“Yes,” you finally smile an honest smile, “and no.”

“Yes and no?”

“No one wants to be ordinary. Boring.” You say the word as if it’s venom on your tongue, “but neither does anyone else ever want to stand out. We want to be admired by everyone else but we also crave to be with everyone else. It’s simply human nature.”

“We aren’t humans.”

“We once were.”

“And you believe that those feelings still linger there in your chest? You believe that the things your mind can not hold onto still exist in your heart that barely beats?” Akaza wonders if his words come out harshly or inquisitive. He’s never been the best at regulating his emotions and even worse at understanding others reactions to it.

But you seem to take it in stride.

You hum softly, “yes.”

He thinks that you’re speaking more to yourself than you are to him.

Akaza shakes his head, “you’re naive.”

“Perhaps so, but naivety is something that we can only lose in this world. And, while it’s not a good thing, it's the last part of our youth.”

“Are you young?”

“No.”

“Then why do you cling to your youth?”

“Because it keeps me from losing myself.”

Fall in love with someone that tells you their secrets.