#not my best work ever but i had fun
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Happy one year anniversary to In Stars and Time!
#ISAT#in stars and time#siffrin#loop#I truly mean it when I say that this was the best game I have played since Disco Elysium.#It pulls off some of the best examples of Ludonarritive Harmony in a video game...possibly ever?#Not to mention just...wow. What a great story. What a tale of twists and introspection. What a tale about the need for home and connection#I know many of you have trusted me before with media recommendations. Trust me one more time.#Do you want to experience the torment of being in a timeloop? And *still* have fun and feel like your time is being respected?#PLAY IN STARS AND TIME!#Do you yearn for complex characters and love unravelling mysteries? PLAY IN STARS AND TIME!!!!#Please heed the content warnings; I took them a little too lightly on my playthrough! They are there for a reason! Don't be like me!#This game means a lot to me and so many others. On the small chance the dev sees this (they are on tumblr after all):#Thank you so much for all your hard work in creating this game and seeing the project through.#It has been a year for us fans but many years for you. So thank you!#I hope it has been a joyful year for you! Watching as people descend into shrieks of agony from playing your game.#It's good! It made me vomit blood. I had so much fun! I felt like I was torturing the protagonist when I played it. I loved it! I cried.
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Turns out Sunlit Trail isn't quite done just yet, so after all that they just send you to a dead end 😂
#rain world#comic#rw chasing wind#sunlit Trail#Hunter#Art#Chasing wind spoilers#I can't imagine anyone filters that tag but just in case sksksks#ANYWAYS turns out mod is way better than I expected and it's super well made.#So far made the trip as hunter (first time) then riv and now working on arti.#For arti I realized that howling rifts led to sub and sub led to dar shore so I was like sweet! A shortcut!#Now imagine for a sec trying to get through a parkcore + miros bird gauntlet with a corpse and a worm within 5 cycles#before the scav ran out of karma and you were stuck inside forever. Yeah#Besides that tho I've been messing around and been very tenderly modding the game.#Turns out you can have a bit of fun with most sprites without too much effort by simply cloning the MSC mod in your files#Then changing the copy's mod info so it doesn't clash and simply swapping images out for whatever you want#As long as you have the sprite name you can do this. You can also change region names and decals and music all sorts of stuff.#In short I've been brewing a custom mod for a friend to make her suffer as much as possible <3#Thanks to a buddy on the rw server for showing me that trick btw lol. The best cesspool I've ever participated in#Oh before I forget- the symbol on CW's head is completely made up. They just looked so... Bald.#Tbh I wasn't expecting their personality to be so... bright? Most interpretations make them kinda solemn and gloomy#But nah this CW is what NSH should've been 100%. I like them. Not gonna spoil too much but their situation is somehow so... chill.#Still bad tho!#Other fun news! There's a scammer going around on discord that's basically like ''bad news I reported you for fraud''#And they're getting a lot of people. My buddy that owned my home server got hit and we lost everything. It's all OK tho nobody was hurt#I keep trying to ask them questions on my alts but they're ignoring me... I kinda wanna bait them into doing the scam with me#to see how far I get before they catch on 😜#Wasting a scammer's time is never a waste of time#Ah I had more to say but I reached my tag max. Till next time- hopefully my animation project will be done by then!
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what-the-fuck-khr’s most popular sky is tsunayoshi! he won with 38.6% out of 10 characters!
#sawada tsunayoshi#khr#katekyo hitman reborn#27#72#my shit#manga coloring#manga colouring#khredit#khrgraphics#teehee hi. the winner got a prize congrats#‘most popular’ is generous obviously but I figure that’s about the gist of it anyway!#it’d be nice to do a much longer one#y’know to get a better look at the answers but for now#this is just for fun!!#I also chose a panel to test me!! it’s been a while y’know#so I chose a panel/page I would typically avoid at all costs HAHA so I had to do some work#had to clean him up a bit. fiddle with the shadowing bc of his forehead flame#his hair………….. not fond of but alas#is it my best work ever on planet earth?#absolutely not lmfao. but I’m pleased with it nonetheless at least#additionally I don’t usually add watermarks on my shit#and if I do I do it on Instagram with a different username#but I wanted to for this bc. y’know. obviously#also yes leaving the Japanese characters black was a stylistic choice#didn’t wanna deal with them and fiddling with them next to the flames so…….
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camilla!! 💚 can i humbly request you to draw this?
YOU SURE CAN!!!! Reference from here!
#ask wounds#my art#art#dbh#detroit become human#dbh fanart#dbh connor#it suits me that the best thing I've ever drawn turns out to be this#I knew the airbrush tool was OP but....... whoa#done with two layers because it's just that good#rA9 I had so much fun working on it
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meow〜
#my art lol#vocaloid#vocaloid fanart#kaito vocaloid#meiko vocaloid#vocaloid meiko#vocaloid kaito#kaimei#sorta?? can be read as platonic/romantic idc interpret as u wish#red#blue#black#there's a funny bonus that goes w/ this but i hate how npf doesnt register breaks properly anymore and fucks up post titles#so i just wont add it here ig. rip. there was ALSO supposed to be a companion piece to this that was darker n edgier#but i am not drawing cyber cat kaito ever again bruh I DIDNT THINK IT WOULD BE THAT HARD TO DRAW BUT WHAT IS GOING ONNN#anyways when i first played project mirai i realized meiko had this module and i was like 'holy shit they can both be cats'#2nd attempt at drawing this cause i didnt like how the first version was coming out. this was supposed to be more emo but eh#me everytime i draw like yeah this is honestly not my best work. post it.#IDC i had fun doing this even if its not the most polished. and i gotta move on to other things#if i agonize over one art piece forever ill never get other shit done. so yuh. make it look decent enough and move on
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@bumble-the-sun-bee y oull never guess who :3
(close up under the cut <3)
#hsgdhfgsdj i couldn t find the og post but i saw one that said smth like that ↑#once i find it ill just put a screenshot of it to credit op cuz that was the truest shit ive ever heard#<i fOund it!!!!!!#aLso ive never done an audio post before lmk if it blows up or something idk how they work-#i jsut#djkfgsdjkfsdjgdkdgkv#hes so pre t yy#also i think!! ive finally found a solid way of drawing his torso that works best!!!#ebebebeb#hdgfhsg ive had plenty of practice with my literal dozens of times drawing him at his point-#ebeb fun fact: i actually posed for this myself#i just set up my phone cam with a self timer :D#oughfbdhdf honestly this was just alot of fucking around with diff stuff i can do on photoshop#since thats what i use lmao-#like the diff gradients n stuff#ebebebebebebebebe#malware my beloved#dca oc#mutuals oc#audio post#my art#storm draws#Spotify#malware my beloved but more
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truly I do not and will not care about any skz brand deal outside of a general, well I hope they're gettin paid well :) kind of way EXCEPT for the samsung one which I actively enjoy only because those boys were always talkin about their iphones and airpods and apple apple apple apple and clowning on changbin for havin his lil android, ooh hoo Changbin why don't you ask bixby about it haha loser, lil abdroid enjoyer hoo hoo and now they have to SMILE so nice and show their little samsung phones and Go wow Changbin was right :)) and thats karma. and thats funny.
#also i had a 300 hundred buck samsung for 6 yrs and it still works so i personally am like#well least its a decent brand 🤷♀️#my dads side of the fam are apple shills and theyre so smarmy about it that it just annoys me so I spitefully will never ever own an iphone#but also theyre like ?? 1800 bucks for not even the best one#die#i would NEVER#also yeah I cana nd will besmirch or make fun of any brand deals they do btw#like if you shill anything the kpop group you like shills you prob wont like it here bc imma make fun of bad outfits and weird ads#im here for the boys not for some rando companies thats a fyi after people got bitchy at me jokin about loewe lol
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this is the most scandalous thing you’re gonna wring outta me EVER
no text ver below cut ↓↓↓
#GOD I HOPE MY TWSTFOLOWERS DONT SEE THIS ILL BE SO EMBARRASSED#if any of them see this. uh. hi#anyway the idea struck me and it ate too hard and so I kinda HAD to.#<- EDIT HEKP GUYS ITS OK YOU CAN REBLLG TBIS 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭#i wuv seeing reblogs so dw about it i was just making a jokey <3 tehepero#i’m in such a mskz vibe i miss them sm!!!! (i always miss them)#burlesque is really fun to work w tho#such an iconic set. like FR#it was so embarrassing showing my friends the sketch for this tho. SIGH#but NGL i do think i ate <3 THANJ you mskz#one of my best sumi’s ever too btw. ate#kazunari miyoshi#miyoshi kazunari#misumi ikaruga#misumi ikagura#ikaruga misumi#misukazu#kazumisu#mskz#a3#a3! act addict actors#a3!#a3! art#a3! fanart#a3! kazunari#a3! misumi#a3 fanart#ashipiko draws ♪#please don’t flop!!!!!! 🫶
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okay, please do one more of the tired Marty and the group of Doc’s….PLEASE
Ask and you shall receive. I hope this silly thing shall suffice :)
Transcription and details under cut
The transcription for my terrible handwriting -
(@ the garage)
Doc: Marty! I came as soon as I-
Doc (cont.): -could.
Marty: Your turn.
(Arrows: Half Asleep, On Fire (literally), covered in soot)
(Fun fact! Not a single party of Marty’s current state (aside from the lack of sleep) is the Docs’ fault! Good ol’ McFly luck strikes again!)
THUD
Docs: MARTY!
So this came to me in a dream today and well it works so behold. This is about an hour after the initial phone call thanks to Jules and Verne asking many questions as Doc was trying to leave and he’d rather they not follow him this time. As for what I mean by the McFly luck- Marty and his ancestors are extremely unlucky. Let’s be honest. To some degree all of them have either directly been unlucky or had their choices result in mild to severe disaster. In this instance specifically it means while trying to move from point A to point B Marty fell half asleep, tripped, knocked a dustpan of ash onto himself, somehow lit himself on fire, and damn near collapsed onto the doorframe. Someone force this kid to take a nap. Please.
#Marty is having A Time with this whole deal#don’t let his tiredness fool you- he’s actually having a lot of fun#Doc is his best friend and damn near a father figure. now there are five of him. that’s five times the dad friend!#probably the safest Marty’s ever felt despite the fact that the universe should be collapsing according to Doc#when he does sleep it’ll be the most peaceful sleep he’s ever had#keep 👏 spamming me 👏 with stuff 👏 for this AU 👏👏👏#I’m attached now and wish to ramble/doodle#the Docpocalypse shall continue#no one is safe#Marty and Doc can try to hide it- it won’t work#Oops All Docs AU#aka the Docpocalypse#okay obligatory tags time#Docpocalypse AU#DO NOT TAG AS SHIP#I SWEAR TO GOD#back to the future#back to the future the musical#back to the future the game#bttf#bttf musical#bttf fanart#back to the future fanart#my art#marty mcfly#doc brown#Emmett brown#until we meet again!
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winston (quant kid 2) (billions) declining a hookup (or work shit) later to instead give himself multiple orgasms (or go to math meetup)
#winston billions#corned beef#what's on the agenda? being able to ever if not always prefer sex solo vs dyadic+. [oneself > others] being the best lay you've ever had.#ditching work demands for anything else#even in [au with jobs fairly different in at least some ways] like well it's still Jobs & you're still Autistique#depending on the hooking up proposer maybe it's like hey; if i stay outta your way.... <_<#many possibilities. this can be about Whatever You Want but no reason to not put forth my heart's truth (winston x his prostate)#literally goes and fucks himself. hell yeah#he is using a little stylus for his calculator watch btw. maybe doing fun sequences. my heart's truth: feels like a fun stim too#adding the little flair details here was also a fun sequence of my heart's truth &c#would also be funny for him to be citing alternate items on his agenda that don't exist to get out of Anything proposed. &/or pushed#ooh i have plans then :/ when is it. & such
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so i’m obsessed with when fics make shuichi a working detective. and i have a small detective/runaway saiouma AU. warning i talk a LOT
so ouma and saihara are childhood best friends. i’m talking like knowing each other since like kindergarten age.
they’re both attached at the hip. shuichi being a shy introvert and ouma being very obnoxious and outgoing. one thing they have in common is that- well they don’t have any friends. no one wants to talk to shuichi because they think he’s weird and no one likes ouma because they think he’s loud and obnoxious. but they mesh so well and become the best of friends.
and their home lives are very polar opposite.
oumas pretty poor, his dad is an abusive dick and his mom is .. well she try’s to be good but in the end she stands by and doesn’t say or do anything to stop his dad. but he’s a mamas boy through and trough.
shuichis mom and dad pretty much abandoned him with his aunt and uncle. they’re upper middle class and they’re very very supportive and loving to him. they’re his mother and father figure but it’s not the same as having your mom and dad. especially sucks when he sees them in movies and tv shows.
they share everything with each other and are very comfortable with each other. they came out to each other and support each other. they’re just very incredibly close.
then one day, ouma just, disappears?
they’re in about high school when he disappears. about 15-16? at this point, shuichis made friends with kaede, maki, and kaito, along with others in his class. he’s still shy and has social anxiety but it wasn’t as bad as it used to be.
he didn’t notice at first, but found it odd that ouma didn’t text him in the morning, or walk with shuichi to his bus stop.
he and ouma go to different schools so he can’t talk to him direct, so he tries calling ouma during his lunch hour but the call didn’t go through at all.
he was bubbling with anxiety the whole day, kaede and his friends tried calming him down but this is WAy out of character. this goes on for days and shuichis just about to freak because.. we’ll he can’t really do anything.
ouma never invited shuichi over or even told shuichi where he lives. he isn’t embarrassed about being poor or anything but he doesn’t want shuichi meeting his dad.
they always hang out at shuichis house, ouma always walks home and refuses any offers of a ride home from shuichis uncle so shuichi has no idea whats going on.
now with shuichis uncle being a detective i imagine that he tries snooping and he figured out it looks like ouma either ran away from home or was kidnapped.
now this is part you can take out but,
the night before, ouma visited saiharas window. not extremely weird. on school night when ouma isn’t allowed past 9, so he visits saiharas windows to talk to him.
what was odd about this time was that ouma seemed to be in a rush. his face was flushed and he was panting like he just ran a marathon. he was at saiharas window just talking, then periodically popping in cool he thought shuichi was. in a kind of ouma way.
“pst! ouma! come on, we have to go!” shuichi jumped a bit, looking past ouma to see a feminine figure jogging up to his back fence.
“who’s that?”
“just… one of my friends” ouma sighed, letting go of the  windowsill.
that night ends with ouma giving shuichi a kiss, a semi love confession and a smile before leaving with his friend.
then he disappears. you can take that part out though. but i think it adds a kind of lead to what happened.
shuichis uncle isn’t allowed to investigate or interfere because he knows ouma so it’s all up to the detective that’s put on his missing persons case. maybe they think he ran away so it’s not being taken seriously?
shuichi just wants to get to the bottom of what happened to his best friend (and let’s be honest, almost lover.)
then it’s teen boy detective saihara snooping around, going to his school just- being a detective.
this is just a funny idea i MIGHT write a one shot about or might not who knows. OBVIOUSLY the people he left with was DICE but shuichi doesn’t know that. i like to think that they’re close this makes shuichi realize that, in reality, he knows nothing about ouma.
sure he knows his favorite food, how he likes his fruit cut and what his favorite flavor of candy is but he doesn’t even know what his parents names are or where he lives.
in reality oumas been planning on running away for a long time, planning with his friends/found family and just has been putting it off because… well shuichi would be alone without him but now that shuichis finally has more friends to help him out he feels comfortable leaving his shitty home life.
definitely wasn’t easy tho!!! you should add more mystery if you want- make it fun
#oh my GOD sappy shut up IM SORRY OKAYY I LIKE TALKING AND I DONT HAVE ANYONE TO TALK TO SO INTO THE TUMBLR ABYSS YOU GO!#that was a lot of talking for a prompt but i’ve been obsessed with detectives and stuff like that since i was like 8#i’ve been a nerd obsessed with detective and detective work for ever i eat up any books or TV shows so you know i’m obsessed with when-#fics incorporate shuichis detective work with the fic. i also might be autistic but that’s for another day.#this isn’t ALL circling saiouma and you can take and leave whatever you don’t like but it’s just a fun idea u had#shuichi just wants his best friend potential lover back#dangonronpa#kokichi ouma#shuichi saihara#drv3#danganronpa#killing harmony#danganronpa v3 killing harmony#saiouma#saioma#oumasai#omasai#prompt#sapy prompt#danganronpa: killing harmony#danganronpa killing harmony#danganronpa v3#danganronpa au#mystery
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no, cain, i don't hate you.
#NAOYA I MISS YOUUUUU AAUUGGGHHHHH NOT MY BEST WORK EVER BUT I *needed* TO DRAW HIM.#i had fun slappin filters all over this but my laptop sure didn't like it!#devil survivor#megaten#smt#shin megami tensei#naoya minegishi#the void given form
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recent lounging babey images
#he's so floppy recently and I hope it's just the heat. I think wamr weather makes everyone floppy and loungy#a beauntifulle boye...#cats#STILL working on posting some drafts. finishing new poll adventure.. other things... It's just hard with the weather and other things going#on. I've had a few more doctors appointments and other things to do recently that have to be done in a time limit#so I hvae to use my extremely limited energy working on that instead of doing the things I'd really rather do. :T#Main focuses though are keeping up better with doing and posting costumes + sculptures as main creative things. at least finishing the#main poll adventure story. Reworking the game I kind of abandoned for a few years. keeping up with game videos and a few other side things.#Especially the game though. I've been in a really worldbuildy mood recently. I just wish that was easier to manifest into something. I've#now put the worldbuilding slideshow reading video on pause for a while because it's SOOO long to do#and I think I should prioritize making games and stuff instead. but still other things. IT's just kind of like.. I have a whole world and#everything very built and planned out but now.. what do I do with it? what's the best way to share that? factual slideshows just going over#the information like a dictionary? make it into a game? write short stories? do art attached to the world? etc. etc. ?? There are so many#potential avenues I end up kind of flip flopping between them a lot because none really seem more beneficial than the others and they all#seem equally enjoyable and also equally hard so. It's like?? I guess just do what the hell ever and hope I made the right choice in terms o#cost benefit and reward for my time lol. ANYWAY.. Also why I'm in my 'trying to make friends' era still because I think having other creat#ive friends can help you find direction like.. people will meet each other and then go 'hey lol just for fun lets start a project together!#and then like 5 years later it's genuinely become something. etc. having other people to help weed out ideas and start small creative teams#together and etc. I feel is a very beneficial part of networking or whatever but also I have the social capacity of a stale bread roll and#am also inherently unrelatable to seemingly a majority of people due to my hermit wizard swag (detachment from general society and hyper#focus on fantasy worlds in my head gjhghj) so trying to meet people as a grown adult with social issues is Very easy and fun (it is not)#even very basic things like my core communication style is so incompatible with a lot of people it's like.. hhhh... People in this modern#age have GOT to stop being afraid of phone calls and/or text that is longer than 6 paragraphs. Work with me here. I WANT to talk to you. bu#I do not know what your emojis mean and it's physically impossible for me to type less than 85 sentences. please.. hhjgjgb#AAANYWAY!! I am working on things when I can given the circumstances (SUMMER).. hopefully some costume pictures and stuff soon. :'3#I've not forgotten about my art and etc. - as usual I just am bad at social media and also functioning if it's above 65F lol
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People joke about ADHD all the time, even swear up and down they totally think they also have it, but then if you ask for an accommodation, to please please please provide things in fucking writing, EXACTLY what they want and need, you will even work it out WITH them, like they promised they would do — repeatedly over and over, and then you don't get it people really will fucking be like:
I am using the incorrect bathroom (TM) to place my shelving and store my things. Homegirl literally removed various sundries and toiletries from a CLOSED CABINET and SHELF because she's interested in boundaries and accountability for my mess.
I said months ago I wanted to improve things for her comfort level and needed a written list of what precisely that fucking looked like in order to achieve it and not miss anything she deemed important. I explained how ADHD works, why I needed a written reference. Why I had to have it laid out, and if something needed changing we needed to write it all out. I would've made the list myself, but they said they would make it for the whole house to hold up their end of things. And, thinking this was a very reasonable adult solution to keeping the house in good shape, I said okay, come up with the list of expectations and what is needed and that way we can update how we handle chores. Awesome. I will do that to uphold my end.
No list ever gets made or drafted or anything despite my bringing it up, knowing we need to do it, but I DO get berated for failing to meet expectations and boundaries that were never fucking provided or delivered and include "don't store toiletries in this particular bathroom because I don't like it."
I can't believe I am a goddamn adult who gets treated like an idiot child for expecting adult communication instead of snide ass passive aggressive bullshit and basic respect for my things.
Because when I fucking get home, my shelving has been removed and a cabinet emptied of my things and placed in the "correct" bathroom.
🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃
Oh shit she solved it, this doesn't look cluttered at all!
What a vast improvement to storing things in appropriate storage!
#my mortal sins include a laundry basket in the kitchen which is where the laundry room is#doing something INCOMPREHENSIBLE to work with my adhd like use the downstairs bathroom to get ready in the morning#instead of the upstairs one because that works best for me and keeps me moving in the morning#storing hobby supplies i was using in the living room in a milk crate basket to clear space at night easily#i left an oil painting to dry on a tabletop easel on MY coffee table and she tried to clean it up causing some of the paint to come off#i used to keep an empty up placed on the mat next to the cat water fountain to remind me to fill up often#not a mess of cups not half emptied cups. a dedicated refill cup tucked behind the fountain#when it kept getting removed i switched it up and placed the cup on top of the cat food bin to clearly indicate it was a cat item#no this is UNACCEPTABLE#also all my coats were removed from the coat rack i feel insane#coats GO ON THE COAT RACK#have you ever had someone actively sabotage your tools to manage your adhd bc its not fun lol#'i can understand why it feels shocking now' literally the most vile snide snake shit when you didnt communicate boundaries at all#its not communicating an expectation to gather up my personal belongings and dump them somewhere else and then text me about it during work#this is how you know shes only ever lived with blood relatives before this lol the entitlement#adhd blogging
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thank you for the tag @fxreflyes this is so cute, except the format is trying to hinder my propensity to ramble, so i’ve rectified this in the tags lmao
i’m over 5'5 / i wear glasses or contacts / i have blonde hair / i often wear sweatshirts / i prefer loose clothing over tight clothes / i have one or two piercings / i have at least one tattoo / i have blue eyes / i have dyed or highlighted my hair / i have or have had braces / i have freckles / i paint my nails / i typically wear makeup / i don’t often smile / resting bitch face / i play sports / i play an instrument / i know more than one language / i can cook or bake / i like writing / i like to read / i can multitask / i’ve never dated anyone / i have a best friend i’ve known for over five years / i am an only child
no pressure tags for @static-radio-ao3 @inevitablestars @itsjaywalkers @carniferous @orbitfalls @transsexualpriest @futurequibblerjournalist <333
#i'm like 5'7 i think. fun fact i used to wear glasses when i was like 11 bc all my friends were getting glasses and i wanted some too so i#lied to my optician. lol good times. don't actually need glasses tho soooo.#this is me coming out as a natural blonde guys….. like my hair hasn’t been blonde in a good year or so and it hasn’t been my natural blonde#in like three/four years but still in my heart of hearts i identify as a blonde. like i get confused when people don't count me as one#i have my ears and nose pierced and i would love a tattoo but unfortunately i have both a fear of needles and commitment issues so.#not sure if that’ll ever happen… would be very hot and sexy tho. also i'm one of those freaks with green eyes lol it's appaza quite rare#my hair is currently like dark dark brown… have been getting the itch to dye it again tho like a kinda reddish colour idk yet we’ll see#i had braces for AAGES. i have freckles in the summer and i paint my nails whenever i remember to. rn they’re a very chipped lilac colour#i think i have a resting bitch face but i can never tell tbf like it might be more of a resting 'dead to the world' face lmao#okay technically i don’t play an instrument anymore! but in the past i’ve dabbled with the cello the oboe and the xylophone. singing too#spanish and italian baybee although ig if this means like fluently then that’s not me but this is literally my degree it’s my whole brand#yes i like to read but also the only things ive read in like the last few months have been either books in spanish/italian for my degree#literary criticism for said span/ital books and… fanfic. so. also i like writing but it's my worst enemy rn the thoughts aren't working :(#i have many best friends that i’ve known for years!!!! in fact i've known some of my friends for like my entire life it's very cute#okay sorry for rambling i can never help myself and i also literally could go on icl like there was Some restraint applied here#kara lore#bc there's quite a lot of it in this one lol#tag games
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it is still so wild 2 me i have someone i can be comfortable with and even gives me More energy to spend time around i truly never thought it would be possible. never before seen in my whole 23 years of living
#even when im alone im just damn wish my bf was here rn :[ wish i could listen 2 them talk rn :[[#doing anything like hrm :( wish they were here experiencing this with me#when usually the second an interaction is done with anyone i retreat and go to writhe in embarrassment at even having been perceived#the shame of existing Gets Me#the less people around at any given point makes me stronger n more safe#but not w them... .. . with them i am Safe.. .#for the first time ever#and im capable of being silly n having fun instead of stiff n terrified and frozen into mutism#i hav tried my whole life to be social#n i never could get it to work#i never felt comfortable even w friends i had for years or even my exgf or family#n yet somehow.. .. it just Happened.. . n now im here#& i still dont know how#but i am so yippee#& i am so in lov#i got em.. .#best person in the world#funniest hottest loveliest coolest most loving person
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