#not my best but i've done worse

[yellowlaboratory]

It’s been a while, you good?

I love y'all for checking up on me LOL 🫶🫶🫶

I'm okay, just MIA from Tumblr for a work trip. and obviously still upset and angry and pissed tf off about a lot right now. I have a few asks in my inbox I'll use to rant in more detail but this is just a smoke signal to let y'all know I haven't disappeared LMAO

[blackbackedjackal]

I love how there was 0 reading comprehension with that ask.

I spent nearly $7000 ($6300 for the ER and $500 for his GP) for a /diagnosis/ only to find out Lobo has cancer that can't be treated without putting him through uneciassiary stress. I won't be pursuing any further treatments other than things to make him more comfortable while he's going through this (fluid removal, special diet, and medication).

I had saved up around 5k in our collective emergency medical fund for me AND him. That's what that money was saved for (over the course of like 12-18 months working my irl job). I still have to pay the remaining balance.

I know a lot of people have grown attached to him through seeing him on my blog, and I wanted to provide an option in case anyone wanted to donate to him. All the money that has been sent has gone directly into the fund to pay off the rest of his bills or buying him some food and treats that he likes. It's helped so much and I really don't even know how to express how grateful I am, not only for the donations, but any advice to help with his care and the time and space some of you all have provided to allow me to vent and make sense of everything. Not to mention all the kind and compassionate messages. Nothing has gone unnoticed on my end, I'm just so overwhelmed that I haven't had the energy to respond to everyone. However I will absolutely remember your kindness in turn if any of you all end up in a similar situation (which I hope no one ever does cause this hurts so much).

Anyway, again, messages like that don't bother me as it comes with such a lack of empathy and perspective that I can't relate. I easily brush off things like that as "wow someone's gonna have a bad wakeup call in the future and regret being an ass about this". But still it's like, the brazenness of it all is what gets me. Like "why didn't you use your personal medical funds to help other people in need?" Like why don't you be a more productive person and donate to those causes your damn self than sending stupid shit on tumblr?

Because I DO donate my time, resources, and finances to others in need. I don't make a huge ass deal about it, especially online, because it's something I've always done out of habit. If you wanna do good, just fucking do it. Because I truly believe the more good you put out in the world the more good comes back your way, and this whole situation is very much proving that theory.

[threewaysdivided]

Hobson Heckled into Historical Haute-Couture

Continuing the Dan Jones & Dragons gala parade with Hobson, the Flower Crowns' oft-harried Halfling Warlock (played by the ever-wholesome Dan Floyd). Is he trying to massage away the realisation that letting his literally-half-brained patron choose his gala attire might have been a mistake? Is Valse giving him a headache over something else entirely? Did he use Detect Magic in a room full of powerful items and accidentally flash-bang himself? Yes.

More Flower Crowns Gala Outfits: Morenthal | Gelnek

As always, design talk under the cut:

But before that, a short story: I've been following Dan's content on Youtube for... oh jeez, that sure is almost a decade now, both on his current New Frame Plus/Playframe channels and back when he was the primary founder and narrator for EC. His old games education videos helped me get one of my earliest jobs in project work and introduced me to a bunch of media production concepts (like scope management) that would go on to inform some of my own storytelling analysis posts. It was a startling little moment of artistic ouroboros to realise I was mentally running through key points from Dan's own Pose Design 101 video as I was drawing his DnD character. Never expected things to come full-circle like that, but if you're seeing this, Dan: here's to you 🫡 If you're not Dan and haven't already, do go check out his stuff - it's all super well-produced, informative, funny and he's just an overall stand-up guy.

Now: onto the tiny little nerd and his passé party attire

This was a really fun costuming challenge, with a bunch of interesting curveballs thrown in the mix. Unlike the rest of the Flower Crowns, Hobson didn't choose his own party outfit: it was picked out by his patron after Valse kibbitzed him into giving up and letting a heroism-obsessed Fey call the shots. Dan cited Valse as having the fashion sense of Stede Bonnet-as-depicted-in-OFMD, briefing a vaguely 19th century-style outfit that had frilled sleeves and 'would have looked gaudy even when it was in fashion a century earlier'.

Actually dating his outfit was the first challenge. D&D settings are kind of an anachronistic uchronia, with classic swords-and-sorcery fantasy campaigns potentially pulling inspiration points from anywhere across the Arthurian era up to pre-war modernity. Which leads to the question: how do you make something seem dated in a setting where most everything looks vaguely ye-olde-fantasy? The other challenge was that, IRL, the 19th century (i.e Victorian era) was when menswear started taking on a lot of the shapes that would eventually become modern suit and top-'n'-tails fashion. Since Trilby was already going to be wearing classic top-'n'-tails formalwear, I decided to set Hobson's style earlier in the 1800s-1820s and pull in some 18th century Stede Bonnet flourishes to visually set them apart. This article provided some great reference images, and once I hit on the figured silk waistcoat I knew I had a potential starting point.

Colour-wise, I stuck with the burgundy-and-gold palette the Dans gave Hobson in his official gala stream art, since those looked good together and matched up with Dan J's tendency to draw Hobson wearing greens/earth-tones and Valse in reds/jewel-tones. The combination is a lot more colourful and richly saturated than is typical for this style of Victorian-adjacent clothes, which felt appropriate for Valse's gaudy tastes.

Fabric-wise, I figured a fun way to gaudy things up even further would be to lean into the silks and satins that were fashionable at the time, but make all of his outfit shimmery rather than just a single feature piece. As a bonus, silk and satin clothes tend be hot, inelastic and have horribly itchy seams if worn unlined, which felt like exactly the kind of thing Valse's all-form-no-function sensibilities would inflict upon the small, long-suffering fellow. Both these fabrics also have a habit of behaving hideously and ripping themselves apart when worn wet, which makes this a great outfit to, say, accidentally fight an Aboleth in. Poor Hobson.

Some other details, just for fun: 1. Hobson's sketch layers include a drawing of his un-removable cursed left bracer. He's pulled the frilly, puffy sleeve over it but you might spot hints of the shape and the gem if you squint. 2. The reference waistcoat I used had floral embroidery on it. Had this actually been a Hobson outfit, I would have converted them to his garland flower (Forget-Me-Nots), but since it was a Valse pick I decided to make them Senaliesse chrysanthemums; a flower given out to friends of the Feywild's Summer Court as a sign of protection and favour. (It also adds extra layers to Pocket mistaking Hobson for a denizen of the Fey, which is fun).

Close crop on the details because I'm very happy with how they turned out:

[bredforloyalty]

girl who's researching the same thing (wasn't aware there was someone like that as she along with like 70% of the group didn't show for the first consultation but y'know whatever i'm not a model student either) helpfully supplied me with little corrections in my translation that i didn't ask for and that very rarely make sense so needless to say i'm pissed off again

[ilkkawhat]

Heya! Hope you’re doing okay ❤️

well, i didn't cry today (and more importantly didn't cry at work in front of everybody) so I'm taking that as a sign that things are getting better...I hope 😅

[missrosegold]

Looks like I just lost another close friend to guy who isn't worth a pile of dog shit. 😊

[ink-stains-and-constellations]

I still have to do art for Pride Month, change my altar for winter, figure out what I want to do for the solstice, organise some stuff for an event, and catch up on a few fanfics...

And now I have to find a new drawing program because Adobe decided to be annoying.

Life's been kind of busy and stressful lately. Hopefully things will slow down a bit soon...

[boltedfruit]

So after having rhinoplasty/septoplasty and some other minor facial surgery for masculinization purposes (a very little bit of chin and jaw lipo) and after being in the end stages of my phalloplasty I can confidently say if I had to do one procedure again once a month for the rest of my life, I'd never do nose surgery again.

Can I breathe now? Yes. Is my nose bump gone? Yes. But NOTHING on earth is worth going through the little splints they suture inside your nose and having them removed for a second time.

[izzy-b-hands]

I'm going to do dishes, and when they're done, I'll have a final idea for my zine draft that will be better than the-

*checks gdocs page*

Current five drafts, two of which are over word count so can't be used (but might survive as just. fics I publish on my own at some point if I can get my brain to not instantly feel overwhelmed by the ao3 publishing page lmao)

This will work. Surely.

[meltedhorror]

I always hoped we'd rot together, that the day the earth reclaimed my bones it'd be by the side of you. . . Maybe if I close my eyes and believe enough, it'll come true eventually. . .

[withercat22]

I feel so... Bland.

[ourceliumnetwork]

actually US english spellchecker i don't care that meagre isn't spelled that way over here. i don't care if it's not spelled that way ANYWHERE. that's the way the word is supposed to be spelled. Cause i said so.

[inpacho]

26/1/25

[girltomboy]

Bf came over last night and eventually told me he actually lied to me for 8 months and he never really quit smoking. Just stopped doing it in front of me or before meeting up with me and I believed all this time that he actually stopped. Last spring. And he was even supported by his mom in his lie. She was in on it. And they did it because they hoped eventually he would actually be able to stop. And I said this is the last nail in the coffin of our relationship, because to elaborate a lie this strong and this lasting is just evil no matter which way you spin it. All this time I even asked him a bunch of times if he ever smoked since "quitting" and he said no?? And he said it in his lying tone but I just thought I was crazy, I thought EYE was the crazy one!! I wouldn't even have been mad, I would have understood I mean there's people who try to quit smoking their whole lives. It could take years. And he even lied to our friends, like my best friend and her bf were in awe, they were so admirative of him and his ability to drop smoking so quickly and with relatively little treatment. And he said my praises and the fact that I was proud of him made him feel good, but how good can something fake and artificial make you feel??!! Mixed with the knowledge that you're LYING!!???? He just cried and told me he was scared of disappointing me, as if lying doesn't disappoint me a billion times worse, and he knows it. And I still decided to stay and give it another go. I think mostly out of fear of breaking up, but ironically I can't stop seeing him like a stranger now. I can't trust him like before, and frankly I don't think I'll be able to anytime soon. And if only this was the first situation of this sort, but our whole almost 5 year relationships has been sprinkled with massive lies. This one takes the cake. It's not even that serious but the fact that he was able to carry on for so long, look me in the eyes and lie to me all this time, so many times he could have taken responsibility and said "actually- " but he didn't. And I trusted him because I wanted to stop being so distrustful. And I was wrong to be so. But do I want to be in a relationship where I'm constantly investigating and questioning things? I really don't. We were able to have a mature and honest conversation. I only love the person I thought he was - this one?? I don't know him.

[crowfanity]

Suddenly really want to replay Tales of Berseria again because I love the characters and (most of) the story but it's been years and I still can't think about it without getting pissed off at how badly the ending screwed Velvet over

[mrfoox]

No offense but like... What the fuck is wrong with me? 🥰