#if I pretend enough maybe it never even happened and everything would be okay again

[inmyheaddd]

coffee sweetener — grayson hawthorne x reader

a/n: the way i have like 6 other fics i'm working on, this was so cute though I had to write it asap!! thank u sm for the req! wc: 1.8k summary: one of your regulars at your café, grayson�� who happens to be insanely handsome, comes in today like usual. but strangely enough, things go a tad further than the surface level small talk you usually have.

a familiar suit clad blonde walked in the near empty cafe you worked in. there was a soft hum of some chatter, but not much, as the early morning sun filtered through the large windows.

some people glanced up from their tables for a second, and some people glanced up at him for a lot more than a small second. could you blame them? no, not really. 

his eyes immediately found yours as he walked up to the cash register which you stood behind, and you found yourself averting your gaze involuntarily. 7:14 AM the time read. there was only one thing that made the early morning shift worth it, and it seemed to be standing right infront of you now. 

today his suit was gray, you noticed. it made his eyes stand out so much more, you nearly stumbled over your words. “you again,” you said, narrowing your eyes jokingly and biting back a smile.

he smiled the tiniest smile, shrugging as if to say ‘what can i say’ before pretending to look up at the menu to order.

“what would you recommend today?” he spoke smoothly, a stark contrast to some of the other people that would come in and simply shout at you.

“why does that matter?” you teased, tilting your head to the side before you looked down at the cash register for a moment and realised you’d already started putting in his usual order. “you get the same thing every time.” 

“'there seem to be no specials, but I'm in the mood for a change.'' he said, his grey eyes doing a once over on you. god, how you wish you weren’t wearing that horrible work apron right now. ''I can be a man full of surprises.”

you let out a small chuckle, “i find that hard to believe.”

everything about him screamed precise and orderly. that was partly what intrigued you so much when you first met him. the fact that he was incredibly gorgeous wasn’t so bad either. 

you expected him to get a black coffee, maybe a croissant if he was feeling extra adventurous that day, but no a large americano and a muffin. he would also get a blueberry scone or two some days, but always get it to go, and never eat it himself.

you almost wondered if he was ordering for someone else, maybe a girlfriend. but again, no. he sat alone with just his work laptop, having his americano and muffin. 

“is that so?” he countered, a slight raise of one of his brows and an amused smile playing on his lips. 

you’d be lying if you said you weren’t smiling yourself. “very much so.” 

you were thankful there weren’t any customers in line behind him that would yell at you for taking too long. but even if there was a rude customer, you doubted they yell.

grayson had one of those sort of intimidating presences that made you think he was born to be a ceo or something. now that he’d been a regular for a couple months, that intimidation mostly wore off on you. you just thought he was a pretty cute guy with an obsession for suits. 

“i suppose i’ll have to prove you wrong then,” he said that in a way that made you think he proves people wrong very often. he adjusted one of his suits lapels, inadvertently drawing your eyes to his arms. “so i ask again, what do you recommend?” 

tearing your eyes away from his arms and back to his face, you asked, “you’re really going with this? okay, fine.” you raised your eyebrows like he had challenged you, but you still couldn’t wipe that stupid smile off your face. 

you rested your hands on the counter, “uhm,” you thought, humming slightly, “well, i usually get a refresher— like the strawberry or dragon fruit ones, or i get a hot chocolate.” you said, then a thought sparked in your mind. “oh! and a chocolate chip cookie. and a cake pop.” 

you bit back a grin— you did not get cake pops or chocolate chip cookies regularly, but the image of grayson with a cake pop or cookie made you want to laugh for some reason. 

“alright then,” he said, ''may i get a medium strawberry refresher, and a,'' he paused, saying the words like they almost pained him, ''two... two chocolate chip cookies, please.''

── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──

grayson left with his drink and cookie, sitting down at a table a bit further in the back, but he was still conveniently in your eyeline. he opened his briefcase, which you hadn't even realised he was holding. it seemed so natural for him to hold, you hadn't looked twice. you caught yourself looking at him frequently, and sometimes he would glance up from his laptop and lock eyes with you for a moment.

he came up to the counter a few minutes later, his drink finished and thrown away, and a cookie and a half left, adjusting his suit jacket with one hand, briefcase in the other. you fake sighed in annoyance as if his very presence was pestering you-- quite the contrary, really.

he only smiled in response.

''well?'' you said, wiping imaginary dust off of your apron, ''how was it? you sticking to the muffins?''

''I have to say, the refresher wasn't horrible. it was quite nice, actually.'' he said, and you gave him a teasing look that was like, 'told you so!' before he continued. ''however, the cookies were far too sweet. i’m sorry, you seem to have terrible culinary taste.''

you fake scoffed, painting the picture of being truly offended. ''okay, can i tell you a secret?'' you leaned forward, and he entertained you by doing the same, motioning for you to continue. ''yes, you're right. these cookies are absolutely horrible, i agree. but i make much better ones.''

amusement flashed across his eyes, like he guessed you had picked out the not-so-good snacks for him on purpose. “really?” he prompted, a dimple flashing in one of his cheeks as he smiled.

“yes,” you swore seriously with a smile that contrasted that no-nonsense tone, “really.” 

“i’d like to be the judge of that.” he said, his voice low and teasing and- god, you could listen to it forever.

“trust me, i’m not lying. i’ll bring some to work tomorrow, just remind me to actually bake them. i have such bad memory.” 

“and how exactly would i be able to remind you?” he tilted his head to one side slightly, a teasing glint in his eye like he could see where you were getting at, and was entertaining it. 

your heart was beating crazy fast, but it was time to finally make a move on this guy. the cash register flirting was simply not enough anymore. you hoped he felt whatever chemistry you were feeling too-- and that you weren't misreading things. then again, you almost failed the subject, so it wouldn't be surprising if you were still getting it wrong.

“why don’t i give you my number," you started, feeling your hands get clammy, ''and you could text me after my shift?” 

his dimples flashed a second time, his eyes doing another once over on you. okay, surely you couldn't misread that one.

you felt your cheeks get hot as he spoke once again, his voice so smooth and low that it fit perfectly with the serenity of the morning and café. “i think i’d like that very much, and that i'll be looking forward to tomorrow.” 

biting back a smile and ignoring the way your stomach erupted with seemingly a million butterflies , you somehow managed to say, “alright, then. i think i'd like it too.''

you wrote down your number on his receipt, ignoring the way your hands trembled with excitement and nervousness, drawing a little smiley face next to it.

holy shit, you were never like this. your heart raced as you watched his eyes find the bottom of the receipt and give you a tiny smile. you watched him sit down an his work laptop, then pull out his phone, type something in, and put it back in his suit's pocket.

ugh, you would break every rule and look at your phone right now, except you were on your last strike for using your phone in the middle of shifts, and you did not want to get fired from this little coffee shop for the sole reason of seeing that one blonde man every morning and having your usual banter. 

''wait,'' you called out, ''what are you going to do with the rest of the cookies? you said, ''don't tell me you'll throw those absolute delicacies away.'' you added jokingly, and grayson simply shook his head, looking down with a slight laugh with a single blonde strand of hair falling into his face.

''I'm keeping them for my younger brother,'' he replied, a fondness in his voice, ''he's quite something, with his extreme love for baked goods.''

you hummed in thought, suddenly realising this was the first time you'd heard about him having brothers. this was really the first conversation about anything that didn't involve small talk and café related things, and you found yourself wondering what it would be like to continue learning more about him. getting to know eachother.

''I think those atrocious cookies will change that love he has,'' you mumbled under your breath without thinking as you shook your head.

you heard grayson chuckle, ''what was that?'' he teased.

''god, i'm gonna get myself fired. forget i said anything.'' you groaned as you covered your face with your hands, already feeling your cheeks heat up again.

''that would prove very difficult,'' he replied smoothly as you put your hands back down. ''I find it near impossible to forget anything you say to me.''

if you thought your cheeks were heated a few seconds ago, they were blazing now. you averted your gaze for a quick second, but his gaze didn't leave yours.

chuckling slightly, you managed to speak without stumbling. "should i start worrying about all my bad jokes being permanently filed away?"

"bad jokes?" he quipped, "i've yet to hear one from you.'' he did not let up on his charm for a single moment, a laugh escaping your lips before he resumed. ''but if you insist, i’ll let you know when you make your first."

'''I'll see you tomorrow, then?''

you nodded, muttering a small 'bye' as you watched grayson step out of the café, the sound of the door chiming behind him.

the anticipation was unbearable, and despite knowing you were on thin ice with your manager, your hand inched toward your phone on the counter.

a quick glance over your shoulder confirmed no one was watching. you unlocked your phone, heart racing as you checked your notifications.

there it was—a new text, well, one from about 10 minutes ago.

Unknown Number:

Already counting down to tomorrow. 🙃 Don’t forget those cookies you talk of, I'm holding you to it.

you couldn’t help the smile tugging at your lips as you quickly saved the number, your hands trembling slightly. you almost let out a snort as his emoji choice before typing, glancing again to make sure the coast was clear.

you

i definitely won’t be forgetting now that you've texted I just may be looking forward to tomorrow too 🫣

you were thankful the place was practically empty, because surely you looked like a crazy person, smiling to yourself. you set the phone back down, trying to suppress the giddy warmth spreading through you. the day suddenly didn’t feel quite so long anymore.

taglist: @x-liv25-jamieswife @wish-i-were-heather @thecircularlibrary @whatsamongus @littlemissmentallyunstable @anintellectualintellectual @lovethornes @maybxlle @sheisntyou @emelia07 @midiosaamor @sweetreveriee @charsoamerican @hxress23 @imaseabear @clarissaweasley-10 @off-to-the-r4ces @thelov3lybookworm @graysw1fe @lanterns-and-daydreams @hermesenthusiast @elysianwayy77 @that-daughter-of-hephaestus @apollosmusee @hijabi-desi-bookworm @goldi-1-graysons-version @saigonharrington @peppapigsposts @thoughtdaughter3 

[meltedhorror]

I always hoped we'd rot together, that the day the earth reclaimed my bones it'd be by the side of you. . . Maybe if I close my eyes and believe enough, it'll come true eventually. . .

[alisonsfics]

wrong name

pairing: tyler owens x best friend!reader

summary: you were doing a great job suppressing your feelings for your best friend until you hooked up with a guy and called out tyler’s name in bed. but it’s fine, tyler would never find out, right? right?

word count: 3.4k

warnings: smut, unprotected sex, car sex, fingering, praise kink, dirty talk, minors DNI (18+ only)

It had been one week since the most mortifying moment of your life.

You’d gone on a first date with a guy named Finn because that’s what you do when you’re trying to get over your crush on your best friend. You hope that maybe you’ll meet a guy that you’ll fall harder for and stop crushing on the guy who would never see you like that.

So, you went back to his place after dinner, and the sex was mediocre at best.

At first, Tyler only popped into your head for second. You imagined how much better it would feel if it was his hands running over your body. Then, you had more intrusive thoughts. Like the thought of Tyler bending you over and fucking you.

It’s only because you were desperate. There was nothing worse than trying to pretend you were having a good time when you were just bored out of your mind.

So, you suggested to Finn that he should blindfold you.

From there, your imagination really soared, and you allowed yourself to believe you were with Tyler.

It was a fun little secret, just for you.

Until you both came, and you called out Tyler’s name and not his.

You were praying you’d spontaneously combust because you couldn’t face him after that. You quickly scrambled back into your clothes and went home.

You were doing okay at pretending it never happened. When you were lying in bed at night, the memory liked to sneak up on you and mortify you all over again.

So, you were boycotting dates for the moment because you couldn’t risk doing it again.

You had a boring night of wine and a movie planned for yourself when Tyler called you. “Hey, Tyler? What’s up?” You asked him, cheerily.

“You got any plans tonight? I was thinking about going out to a bar.” He suggested.

Even over the phone, his voice ran right through you. Goosebumps ran down your arms as you tried to hide your excitement. “That sounds great. Pick me up at 8?” You suggested.

���Sounds perfect, see you soon.” He replied.

You hung up the phone and flopped backwards onto your bed. The heat rushed to your cheeks. You had to fight the urge to giggle and kick your feet.

You’d been friends with Tyler for years, which didn’t mean you stopped getting butterflies around him. You just got better at hiding it.

You both had been through a lot together, and you didn’t want to jeopardize it by letting he find out you were harboring feelings for him.

So, you picked out a cute black dress to wear. One that Tyler’s eyes would linger over, but he’d never admit it. Just like every time the two of you went out to a bar.

You’d just finished getting ready whenTyler’s red truck pulled up outside your apartment. You quickly ran down the stairs to greet him.

“There she is,” he said, his eyes running down your body as he got out of the truck. That look of awe was enough to make you feel dizzy.

You could feel the butterflies start to swarm as he walked closer to you. “You look gorgeous as always.” He said, taking your hand and spinning you in a circle.

You thanked him as he pulled you in for a quick hug.

“Your chariot awaits.” He joked, opening the passenger door for you.

The drive there went by in a flash. You and Tyler knew each other like the back of your hands, so you could easily spend hours talking about nothing and everything.

“So, any particular reason you wanted to go out tonight?” You asked, looking over at Tyler as you both took a seat at the bar. You knew Tyler’s favorite solution for problems at work was going out drinking with you. No one could calm Tyler down the way you could.

“Can’t it just be because I wanted to hang out with my best friend?” He asked, cocking his head to the side. You rolled your eyes at him, swatting his arm. “While I am a delight, I know that’s not it.” You encouraged him, letting your hand linger on his forearm.

His eyes darted down. The way your small hand was gripping onto his muscular arm was enough to distract him. You quickly pulled your hand away, feeling slightly embarrassed after seeing his reaction.

“Just tornado stuff. We had this big opportunity to get a bunch of data, but some of the equipment malfunctioned. We lost almost everything.” He explained. He was eager to move the conversation past how he had almost malfunctioned because you grabbed his arm.

You gave him a small sympathetic smile. “I’m sorry, Tyler. That’s frustrating. You’ll figure it out. I mean, you’re the tornado wrangler after all.” You said, cheesily trying to cheer him up. Tyler chuckled and looked down at his hands.

Ever since Tyler had been branded the “Tornado Wrangler,” you loved to tease him about it.

“Oh, c’mon, you know I hate when you call me that.” He groaned, smiling at you. You cheekily shrugged your shoulders.

“I gotta go to the bathroom real quick. Can you watch my drink?” You asked him. Tyler quickly nodded, sliding your drink over in front of him. You rushed towards the bathroom, where you assumed there’d be a line.

“Two shots of tequila please,” Tyler heard a man come up to the bar and order beside him.

He didn’t pay a lot of attention to it, until he saw the man down both shots back to back, out of the corner of his eye. “Rough day?” Tyler joked, looking over at the man.

“Rough week,” the man corrected him, with a grim expression. Tyler looked at the man’s face, not being able to shake the feeling that he knew him from somewhere.

“Wait, do we know each other? You look familiar.” Tyler said, furrowing his eyebrows as he thought. The man gave him an awkward smile and shrugged. “I don’t know. I don’t think so, man.” He said, knowing he’d never seen Tyler before.

That’s when he saw Tyler’s eyes light up in recognition. “Oh, wait. You’re Finn, right?” He asked him.

Finn’s expression only became more anxious and worried. “Yeah, umm. I am, but how do you know my name? I don’t think we’ve ever met.” He asked.

Tyler quickly shook his head, trying to assure the man who was growing more nervous. “No, we haven’t met. You went on a date with my friend Y/N last weekend. She showed me your picture before you guys had your date.” Tyler said.

Finn nodded in recognition. All the memories of that night came rushing back to him. “Oh, yeah. That explains it.” Finn said, sheepishly. It was clear to Finn that this man he was speaking to didn’t know anything about how that date went.

“Sorry, don’t want to be rude. I’m Tyler, by the way.” Tyler said, quickly shaking Finn’s hand. Finn stared blankly back at him. “Tyler?” He asked, feeling his blood run cold. Tyler nodded, giving Finn a friendly smile.

Meanwhile, you were on your way back to the bar.

“Hey, Tyler. I’m back.” You said, reaching to grab your drink back from Tyler. Your gaze drifted past Tyler to the man that was standing beside him.

“Hey, Y/N. Good to see you.” Finn said, with a fake smile. You felt yourself freeze. You wanted to run away, but you couldn’t convince your feet to move.

“Oh—uh, Finn. Yeah, good to see you.” You nervously lied. Your eyes darted between Tyler and Finn. You were praying Finn hadn’t found out Tyler’s name. You were also praying he hadn’t told Tyler what happened.

“I guess you haven’t told your friend, Tyler, here that our date was kind of a bust.” He said, coldly.

You wrapped your hand around Tyler’s bicep, trying to tug him towards you. You wanted Tyler to get the hint that you really wanted to leave.

Tyler turned to face you. He saw the pure panic in your eyes. “You okay?” He asked you, quietly.

You tried to form the word “no,” but no sound would come out of your mouth. All you could imagine was Finn telling Tyler what happened. You could practically see the way that Tyler’s face would change.

“I think the guy deserves to know.” Finn said, noticing the way you were tensed up. You weren’t hard to read in this moment, but Finn had been humiliated when you said the wrong name. So, he wanted revenge.

“That’s none of his business.” You said firmly. You refused to look Tyler in the eye. You were worried that if you did, he’d somehow see into your soul and know what happened.

“Let’s go.” Tyler said, standing up and wrapping his hand tightly in yours. Tyler knew how uncomfortable Finn was making you and wanted to get you out of there as quick as possible.

Tyler turned to leave, pulling you with him when Finn yelled after you both.

“We hooked up, but she called out your name, not mine.” Finn said.

You felt the hair on the back of your neck stand up. Your stomach sank. You felt like the floor was going to open it up and pull you under.

You tugged your hand away and ran out of the bar and into the parking lot. Tyler was trying to process what he’d just heard.

He turned around to face Finn, who had a grin on his face. “The lady told you to shut up.” Tyler practically growled, shoving Finn against the bar.

Tyler turned on his heel to follow you towards the car.

When he got outside, he saw you standing by the passenger side of the truck. Your arms were crossed, and your eyes were focused on the ground.

“Sweetheart—” Tyler started to say before you cut him off.

“I want to go home.” You snapped. Your tone came out harsher than you meant to.

Tyler slowly nodded. He didn’t want to push you to talk about something you didn’t want to talk about. You both got into the car in complete silence.

Tyler hesitated before putting the keys in the ignition. He glanced over at you. He could see your eyes starting to water as you still refused to look at him.

He cautiously reached over to let his fingers interlace with yours. “Will you please look at me, sweetheart. I’m not going anywhere. You’re not scaring me away. I promise.” He said, softly.

You hesitantly looked over at him. He gave you a soft smile, trying to calm you down. “Finn was a douchebag for telling me, but I’m not going anywhere.” He assured you. You softly squeezed his hand.

He used his other hand to brush a piece of hair behind your ear. “So…you were calling out my name, huh?” Tyler asked you, with a cocky smirk.

Your eyes went wide. You tugged your hand away from his and covered your face with your hands. “Tyler,” you complained, dragging out his name.

He chuckled to himself. “I wasn’t trying to tease you.” He said, holding his hands up in surrender.

You peeked at him through your fingers. “That’s exactly what you’re doing, Owens.” You said, groaning to yourself.

He shook his head. Then, you felt him grab both your hands. His rough calloused skin scratching against your soft hands. He moved your hands away, looking you in the eye.

“I was just offering to make your little fantasies a reality.” He said in a low voice.

You leaped across the car, grabbing the collar of his shirt and kissing him. His hand flew to the back of your neck as he kissed you back.

You could taste the liquor on his lips. The kiss was sloppy and hungry. You’d both wanted this for too long to be patient. His fingers weaved through your hair, holding on tightly.

His other hand grabbed your waist. His fingers caressed the silky material of your dress. His mind could only think about how much softer your skin would be under his touch.

You seemingly read his mind. “Go ahead,” you mumbled against his lips. You could feel his lips curve up into a smirk. He slipped his fingers under your short dress, caressing your upper thigh.

He noticed the goosebumps that were covering your legs. It only encouraged him more. His hand slowly moved higher up your thigh.

You whimpered against the kiss. You felt the familiar aching between your legs. You needed his touch like you needed air. “So needy for me, baby,” he said, cockily.

The pet name sent a shiver rolling down your back. You bucked your hips up against nothing. “Please,” you begged him.

He rubbed his thumb across your clothed heat. A small wet patch had formed in your panties. Another whine came out of you.

He quickly pushed your panties to the side and plunged a finger into your folds. You gasped, pulling out of the kiss. Your eyelids softly fluttered closed.

“Oh, fuck,” you mumbled softly. Tyler peppered kisses to your shoulder as you leaned your head back. Your senses were overwhelmed. There wasn’t a single coherent thought in your head. He curled his finger inside of you, making you buck your hips against his hand.

“You want another, sweetheart? Can you handle that?” Tyler asked you. You furiously nodded your head. He could feel his jeans becoming strained as he watched you writhe under his touch.

He added another finger, stretching you out. Your mouth hung open as you adjusted. Your wetness only allowed Tyler to move his fingers quicker. He quickly moved them in and out, watching as your breath quickened.

Your stomach started to tighten. You reached for anything to sink your nails into. Your hand landed on Tyler’s bicep.

He pressed his thumb into your clit. “Tyler,” his name fell effortlessly from his lips. He quickened his pace. Every breath and moan from you made him go faster.

“Cum for me, baby,” he praised you.

He started rubbing circles around your clit. You whined, helplessly grinding your hips down against his hand. You swore you were seeing stars. “Oh fuck, Tyler, I’m gonna—” you swore, biting down your lip.

“Go ahead. Cum on my fingers.” He instructed. Your orgasm hit you. You clenched around his fingers, riding the high. “Tyler, so good,” you mumbled. Your legs were shaking, and you threw your head back against the headrest. He continued pumping his fingers into you.

“That’s it. There you go.” He softly praised you. Tyler’s fingers slowed down, helping you down from your peak. He brushed your hair out of your face and kissed your lips softly.

He wiped his soaked fingers on his jeans. You softly nipped at his bottom lip. His smirk grew again. “What do you think you’re doing, sweetheart?” He asked you.

Instead of answering him, you climbed across the console into his lap. Tyler pulled out of the kiss to watch you, in shock. His eyes were wide at the sight in front of him.

You were straddling his lap. Your skirt was hiked up to your hips while your cum was running down your thigh. Your makeup was smudged. Your lips were swollen. And you looked tired out from your orgasm.

“Hold on, just a second, baby,” he said, quickly sliding his seat all the way back and leaning the chair as far back as it would go.

As soon as you both had more room, you were back all over each other. Tyler’s hands were possessively holding on your hips. You unbuttoned Tyler’s shirt as you kissed him. Feeling the last button come undone, you raked your nails over his bare chest. Tyler groaned into the kiss. Your touch was magic on him.

“Need you,” he mumbled against your lips. You tugged his shirt off his shoulders and threw it in the back seat.

Tyler leaned back as you reached for the hem of your dress. He watched with a cocky smile as you pulled the dress over your head. He’d just been fingers deep in you, but the sight of you in your bra and panties was enough to make him crazy.

“So fuckin’ beautiful, darling,” he practically moaned. He grabbed the back of your neck and pulled you down to kiss him again. Your hands struggled to undo his belt while he unclasped your bra.

Having Tyler’s hands on you had your skin burning. You felt like your skin was on fire, in the best way. You could sense his desperation. His hands explored your body, not wanting to leave any part untouched.

His hands covered you, helping you undo his belt and unzip his jeans. He quickly tugged his jeans down to his knees.

You pulled out of the kiss to take a breath. Tyler buried his face in between your breasts, leaving sloppy kisses and a trail of saliva. He leaned forward, taking one of your nipples into his mouth.

Your eyes rolled back, grasping onto Tyler’s arms. “Need you, Tyler,” you mumbled.

“All you had to do was ask, baby.” He said, tugging down his boxers. His cock spring out, slapping against his stomach. He watched as you practically drooled over him. He brought you back into the moment as he pulled off your panties.

“You want to do this right here? Or you wanna move into the backseat?” He asked you, smirking at your eager expression.

“Right here,” you said. The words came out rushed as you captured his lips in a kiss. He smirked against your lips. “Hang on, sweetheart. If you’re gonna ride me, you’re gonna need this.” He said, grabbing his cowboy hat from the backseat and plopping it on your head. A bashful smile appeared on your face.

You shifted your weight, holding onto Tyler’s shoulders. “Go ahead, cowgirl.” He encouraged you with a wicked smile.

You slowly sunk yourself down onto his length. A low groan escaped Tyler’s lips at the feeling of you wrapped around him. “Fuck, darling,” he moaned, grabbing at your hips. He helped lift you up and let you plunge back down on his cock.

“Oh, Ty— so good,” you mumbled, rolling your hips back into his.

Tyler took a mental picture of you riding him while wearing his hat. He wanted to remember it forever.

With his assistance, you sped up the pace. You were ramming your hips down against his. With each thrust, you could feel Tyler reaching deeper inside you.

“This what you were thinking about with that other guy? Thinking about wrapping your sweet pussy around my cock. You fit perfect. It’s like you were made for me.” Tyler praised you. His comments went straight to your core. Your legs started to shake.

His name fell from your lips. He bucked his hips up to meet yours halfway. “Need to…f-f-faster,” you stuttered, feeling your muscles begin to tighten.

“Don’t worry, I’ll help ya,” he assured you, grabbing a tight hold on your hips. He slammed you down on his cock.

You could feel him brush up against your g-spot. You clenched your eyes shut, a whimper escaping your lips. “That the spot, sweetheart? Don’t worry. I’ll give it the attention it needs.” He said, flipping your body over so he was on top.

“You did so good, honey. But just let me do the work. You focus on cumming for me.” He instructed you.

He braced his leg against the console and started pounding into you. Your legs began to shake. You wrapped your hands around the headrest, your knuckles turning white.

“I’m almost—” you said, breathlessly. The noises bouncing off the truck walls were almost pornographic. You could hear every thrust. From Tyler’s low groans every time you squeezed around his cock to the sound his cock made as it slipped through your wetness.

His hand flew down to your clit, rubbing small tight circles. “Can’t last much longer, darling,” Tyler moaned. You could tell from his erratic thrusts that he was telling the truth. You vision was starting to go white as the muscles in your abdomen contracted.

“Oh, shit. I’m gonna— oh, fuck, Tyler.” You called out as you came around him. Your walls clenched down around his cock, pushing him over the edge. “Oh, fuck,” he groaned, bucking his hips into yours and he came inside you.

He collapsed against you, slowing his pace and bringing you both down from your highs. His sweaty body pressed against yours.

“So, how’s that compare to what you were imagining?” Tyler asked you, pressing a chaste kiss to your lips.

You gasped for breath. “S-so much better,” you mumbled, breathlessly.

taglist: @laurakirsten0502 @miraclesoflove @nathaliabakes @millipop18 @lillyssh-tposts @shyinadarkplace @vanteguccir @missroro @guacam011y @sw33t-cupid @ice-dtae @leyannrae @sia2raw @nyx2021 @just-a-littlebit-of-everything @shyconversationalbookworm @shadowhuntyi @visenyaverse @ruzannetheseahorse @superdeath @wandaswifeyforlifey @spookyqueen @mcuswhore @princess-evans-addict @n3ssm0nique @peakascum @cjand10 @namsey1987 @supernaturalstilinski @stephv213 @warriormirkwood @one-sweet-gubler @narliesstuff @bibissparkles @stupiidfrogs @navs-bhat @marvelcasey05 @alipap3 @djs8891 @love2write2626 @khaleesibeach @ateliersss @xbox5angelx @kneelforloki @ipromiseidk @ilovefictionalcharacters26 @lovelyleanie @avengersgirllorianna @nerdgirljen @ellesmythe @harrysgothicbitch @mikoxvelez @emma8895eb @xoxabs88xox @velyssaraptor

Let me know if you want to be added to my taglist for all my imagines or for a specific character/fandom!!

[solxamber]

I HAVE A REQUEST FOR IDIA SHROUD X A SHARK READER >///<

More specifically, a reader that just has a very large shark tail that he likes to hold onto, weather it's hugging it or holding the tail tip as they walk down the halls. Idk I think it would be cute 🫶

Hook, Line and Shy Guy - Idia Shroud x Reader

Idia loves your shark tail, you think it's adorable.

i loved the idea so much <3<3

Idia clutches the end of your tail again.

You’ve told him about a thousand times that it’s fine—no, really, you don’t mind—but the way he’s gripping it like it’s his lifeline, bright red ears poking out of his hood? Yeah, that says everything.

He likes it. A lot.

Currently, the two of you are walking through the halls of NRC. Well, you’re walking. Idia? Idia’s trailing after you, both hands wrapped around the very tip of your shark tail like it’s some kind of comfort object. You flick it every once in a while just to mess with him, and he lets out these quiet little startled noises, like you’ve just pulled a rug out from under him.

“C-Can you not?” he stammers, even though he doesn’t let go.

You throw him a grin over your shoulder. “Didn’t know you were so attached, Shroud.”

He tugs the edge of his hood lower over his face, mumbling something under his breath. You don’t catch it, but you think it was something like, "I hate this place." Or maybe "I'm doomed."

Frankly, it’s adorable.

Idia holding onto your tail has become a habit. The first time it happened, you thought it was an accident—he was nervous, fidgeting with his sleeves, and when your tail flicked by, he just… grabbed it. You didn’t have the heart to pull away when he looked so relaxed for the first time that day.

And now? Now it’s a thing. Your thing.

He clings to your tail when you’re walking to class. When you're studying together in the library, he drapes it across his lap like a security blanket and pretends not to notice that his hands wander to it whenever he’s stressed. Heck, one time in the Mostro Lounge, he straight-up hugged the base of your tail to his chest like it was a giant pillow.

And, honestly? You can’t get enough of it.

“Why do you like holding it so much, anyway?” you ask, slowing your steps just a bit so he doesn’t have to rush to keep up. “Feels kinda fishy, if you ask me.”

Idia grumbles. “That’s... That’s a pun. And it’s not funny.”

You chuckle, swishing your tail to the side slightly. He stumbles, almost tripping, but still clings onto the end of it. You swear you see his hands tighten, just the smallest bit.

“It’s soft, okay?” he mutters, so quietly you almost miss it. “And… I dunno, I just... I like it. Is that a crime?”

A warmth spreads in your chest at the honesty. Idia being open is a rare thing, and you’ll take any little piece of it you can get. But you’re not letting him off the hook that easily.

“So you like soft things, huh?” you tease, glancing back at him with a grin. “You want me to just wrap you up in it one day? I could curl it around you like a big ol’ burrito—”

“Stop talking!” he hisses, his face flushing all the way to his neck. He looks like a lobster. But the way his fingers keep fiddling with your tail tip? Yeah, he’s not letting go.

“Okay, okay, I’ll stop,” you say, stifling a laugh. “But seriously, it’s kinda cute that you like it.”

“...I'm not cute.”

You blink. “Dude, you’re holding onto my tail like it’s a stuffed animal right now. How is that not cute?”

Idia grumbles something unintelligible, squeezing the fin of your tail in protest. He’s trying to look annoyed, but the effect is ruined when you feel him press his forehead to it, hiding his blush in your scales.

“You’re evil,” he mutters. “Pure villain energy.”

“And you love it.” You flick your tail, knocking lightly against his side. He yelps but still doesn’t let go. He never does.

The two of you continue down the hall, your tail gently swaying behind you and Idia holding the end like it’s his own personal lifeline. A couple of passing students stare, but he doesn’t even care at this point—he’s too comfortable, too content.

By the time you reach his room, he doesn’t even hesitate to pull your tail onto the couch with him, clutching it like a favorite blanket.

“Don’t make it weird,” he mumbles, tucking his hood over his head again.

You sit beside him, the warmth of his hands still lingering on your scales. And as he absentmindedly strokes the tip of your tail while zoning out in front of the TV, you can’t help but think that this might just be your new favorite thing, too.

Masterlist

[toomanystoriessolittletime]

Failing

Summary: Joel made many mistakes. The biggest was leaving you.

Pairing: past Joel Miller x fem. reader

Wordcount: 1.3k

Rating: G

Warnings: angst, a lot of inner thoughts, panic attacks, Joel and Ellie do not talk, Joel is a mess, lots of talk about being a failure and not good enough, messy breakup, unplanned pregnancy

A/N: This has been going through my mind since I saw the new pic yesterday. This is really different from everything I write usually, so let me know what you think. And yeah, come yell at me in my inbox

follow @toomanystoriessolittletime-fics and turn on notifications to get notified when I post new fics

part one of invisible string

He knew he should have stayed home tonight.

He could have worked on… something. He could have talked himself into picking up his guitar and pretend everything was okay.

He could pretend that he wasn’t a failure.

He could pretend Ellie was still talking to him.

Instead he was here, the people around him celebrating god knows what, music playing, people dancing and he?

He was hoping to at least get a look at the girl that had become like a daughter to him. The daughter he lost because he lied to her.

Turned out his mother was right, lying was not getting him anywhere. 

He hadn’t talked to her in weeks, not getting more than a fleeting look at her from afar like a creepy stalker.

Tommy was right, he needed to give her time.

But somehow he felt like time was running out. 

Tommy had been right in a lot of things lately. Something Joel was not used to, still having the irresponsible young man in the back of his mind he had been before outbreak.

But Tommy wasn’t that man anymore.

He was a husband, a father, a respected leader of the little community he had helped build.

And Joel was…. He did not feel like he changed much. He was still angry all the time.

Angry at the world.

Angry at the people.

But most of all angry at himself.

The way he was feeling now? Alone and lonely?

He had no one but himself to blame for it.

It was moments like these that you came to his mind.

You would know what to do. You would know how to fix this mess that he got himself into. You always did. Until he had pushed you away for good, almost six years ago when he got even more involved in the underground in the Boston QZ.

Meeting and falling in love with you had been the only good thing that had happened to him since the outbreak. You had seen him, the real him.

The broken man that was desperate for… something.

That something seemed to be you.

But like every good that happened to him, he managed to fuck this up too. Not at first, but definitely in the end. 

And he tried. He tried to become a better person. Tried to become the man you deserved, not listening to you when you told him that he did not have to become a better person.

That you fell for him the way he was. With all flaws he thought he had.

But maybe if he had worked on himself he wouldn’t have reacted so poorly when you told him that you were pregnant.

Maybe he wouldn’t have blamed you and you only, taking the easy way out and telling you he would not go through this again.

He should have talked to you, instead of lashing out, should have told you how fucking scared he was about losing another child. About losing you. About raising a child in this fucked up world. About fucking up.

He did so anyway.

He chose to forget about the whole conversation the two of you had after you told him that you were pregnant and that you were intending to keep it from his mind. Or he tried. God, did he try.

But now, deep in the night, when he was laying awake and alone in bed, only the shadows of the night in his company, the words he spat to hurt you creeped back into his mind, not that they had ever been gone.

I don’t love you.

Get rid of it.

Get out of my life.

I never loved you anyway. 

He could still see the way your face crumbled, tears running down your cheeks. 

He broke you that night. And he broke himself. 

He thought about this last argument, this breakup a lot if he was honest with himself.

He never told you, not in words, how much he loved you. He took you for granted. He shouldn’t have been this surprised to learn that you had left the QZ days after he broke you. 

Not a day went by that he wondered what happened to you.

If you were alive.

If you kept the baby.

Would it have your eyes and his hair?

A boy or a girl?

Where they as stubborn as Sarah was?

Did you still love him as much as he still loved you?

Shaking his head he took a sip from the surprisingly good beer someone had offered him when he came here, his eyes wandering through the room, sneaking glances at Ellie who smiled at Dina, deep in conversation with the other girl.

Sucking his bottom lip in, his hand flexing on his side as he tried to find the courage to walk over to Ellie and ask her if they could talk, again, when he heard laughter behind him.

Laughter he heard before, a long time ago.

A laugh he heard in his dreams when his mind allowed him to dream about you instead of the nightmares that plagued him. 

Narrowing his eyes he tried to remember why he was hearing that laugh, why that voice that spoke in low tones now, made his heart flutter, when he saw Tommy walk towards him in a fast pace, his face worried.

“Joel,” he said but Joel wasn’t listening to him.

He was busy preparing for a breakdown that was creeping slowly into his body. 

Joel’s heart seemed to make the connection before his brain did, heart beating widely in his chest as he slowly turned around, his brother’s hand on his shoulder to keep him for turning. He shrugged it off with a grunt, bracing himself to be let down, that he was finally turning insane and imagining you when his eyes landed on you.

Blinking his eyes in disbelief he released a shaky breath when you were still there. 

You were sitting at one of the picnic tables, still as beautiful as he remembered a small smile on your face. A man had his arm wrapped around your back and in your lap sat a girl not older than five who had your eyes and his brown curls.

His heart stopped, he was sure of it.

“She got in yesterday. You were on patrol, I was trying to find you and tell you but….” Joel heard his brother say, but he ignored him.

You were here.

You were here.

And you were alive.

And you had a girl sitting in your lap that was….

His eyes widened when you leaned back and he saw a little boy sitting in the lap of the man next to you that looked like a mini copy of Joel himself.

His chest felt heavy.

Closing his eyes he tried to take deep breaths, but he just couldn’t.

This was too much.

This hurt too much.

This was the happiest he ever was.

“Joel?” he heard his name from his side, Ellie looking down at him worriedly as he pressed his hand against his chest, his eyes watering.

This was the first time she had talked to him in weeks and it might as well be the last time from the way he felt right now.

He was having a panic attack.

But it felt so much worse than it had ever before.

Looking away from Ellie he turned his head back towards you, finding you now looking at him with wide eyes.

“Deep breaths brother,” a strong arm came to pull him up and his frantic eyes found Tommy’s.

“In and out,” he said, trying to calm down his brother. Joel’s hands grabbed his brothers shoulders. Trying to mimic the way he was breathing but couldn’t.

“Joel?” he heard your voice, his head now turning towards you, finding you looking at him worriedly.

Joel shook his head, dark spots at the corner of his eyes.

“You’re here,” was the last thing he whispered before he passed out.

[revelboo]

Just dropping by to compliment your writing. Seriously, at this point your posts have basically adopted me. I LOVE everything you write! (Especially because you It made me obsessed with transformers again.) .... anyway, kisses from a Brazilian 😈😘😔💗👍👍

Aww! Thank you so much!

I felt bad and went ahead to type up the second half. The tags you guys add when you reblogged the last bit were making me feel a bit guilty.

Everything is Alright Pt 32

Starscream x Reader-guardian

• Hidden among the clouds, he circles. Can’t make himself leave you there alone, tethered to his own worries. To you. Still watching over you, because you’re so small down there standing right where he left you. Like you’re waiting on him to come back for you. Finally, you begin to walk. But you keep looking up, looking for him and it hurts more than he’d thought it would. Breaks him wide open as he wonders what you’re thinking. That he doesn’t want you anymore? That you’re not needed? He knows that feeling all too well. Hates it.

• You have no idea how far it is to town walking, but you’re already soaking wet and cold. Moving at least might keep you warm since you’re still in that stupid, thin dress. He’s not coming back. You weren’t sure what was going to become of you with him, but just being let go? Maybe to him it’s been like rehabilitating a wild animal and he’d finally decided you could be released back into the wild. Maybe he just really had gotten bored with you. Those maybes are driving you crazy. Because you’re hurt that he just threw you away.

• Because you cared about him. Wrapping your arms around yourself, you shudder as lightning crackles across the sky, the wind whipping your soaking hair across your cheek in little, stinging lashes. When exactly had it stopped being a game you were playing to survive? Agreeing with him, pretending interest in his day at first, but when had you genuinely started to care? The same time you’d started smiling when he returned from his duties, because you were really happy to see him and being greeted made him happy. Made his wings lift up higher at being acknowledged. Making him happy had made you happy.

• There’s a truck approaching on the road below as he rolls through the clouds, condensation slicking him. Too high above to hear what’s said when that truck slows beside you. When you turn. Tension winding him tight when you don’t keep walking, but pull open the door and get in. Someone you know? Someone looking for you? To take you home? A friend or something else to you? It doesn’t matter. He shouldn’t care, but he does.

• Shivering, you reach to angle the vents on the passenger side more directly on you as the driver cranks the heat. He’s older than you, old enough to be your dad and he’s frowning at you. Not buying that you’re okay. “Everyone thinks you’re dead. It’s been a month,” he says, tone clearly saying that he knows you haven’t just been wandering through the woods that long. That lie isn’t going to work. Apparently you’re famous in town, your face on missing persons flyers and they’d even swept the woods and had divers checking the small lake for your body.

• “I’m okay.” You’re not, but you just want to go home. Not to the police station or the hospital. Home. Your empty home. That fact has never bothered you before, but now it does. There’s no one waiting there, no one to talk to. He’s frowning at you, but he agrees to drive you home after making a call to the police, making you let them know you’re alive and found. Making you agree to go in tomorrow to explain what happened. Where you were. You don’t even have the energy to think up a lie right then.

• The guy even walks you up the drive and watches as you root around in the dirt of a very dead hanging basket of what had been impatiens a month ago to find the spare key and let yourself in. Only then does he relent and leave. You never think to ask his name, too numb and oddly empty. Around you the house is achingly silent.

• The intruder leaves and he still circles. No other vehicles. Does that mean you’re alone? No. How could you be? He transforms and lands a safe distance away, keeping low as the lights come on in the house, watching your shadow pass the windows as a dark smudge. And eventually the lights go back out. No one coming for you, because there is no one. His spark aches. He doesn’t mean to stay all night, but he can’t leave you there alone. Unwanted.

• Even if you believe he’s abandoned you, he can watch over you. Knows it’s not safe for you, but can’t make himself go. If he keeps returning here it’ll be noticed and questioned. You’ll still be in danger because of him. He knows this. And he still can’t force himself to leave you, because he is selfish. You don’t need him. But he does need you.

• Wrapping your robe around yourself as you head into the kitchen to get some coffee going, you stop short as the house creaks on its foundation. Eyes lifting to see something blocking the window. Familiar colors. Chest tight, you head outside and stare up at Starscream. He’s leaning against the house, wings drooping and optics shuttered in recharge. Like he’d spent all night outside watching over you. “You big idiot,” you sigh affectionately, your eyes burning as you reach out to touch the back of his huge hand. He hadn’t left you.

Previous Next

[luviwon]

FLOWERS OVER EXES — k.sn

❀ in which kim sunoo makes up for your ex boyfriend's miserable behaviour and gets you flowers to bring up your mood. but he doesn't stop there and brings you to heaven too. ❀ a combination of angst, fluff and vanilla smut is this a thing? (who could not fall for romantic sunoo i am actually on the floor now someone rescue me) ❀ in the mood for something sad but sweet and passionate as well so there you go ❀ for whoever doesn't want to read the smut part, i will put a small warning before the start of that so read worriless. as for my horny readers, you can just jump down there to avoid all the tear-causing scenes.

"leave, then. i don't need you anymore"

his words were just as a sharp arrow, splitting your heart into two. you did not dare to confront him anymore, not after everything that has happened. looking at him in the eyes one more time, you felt a burning tear painting your face. it was not worth crying for this pathetic man, but you couldn't help yourself. everything you have shared together was still there somehow, and despite his wrong doings, you still kept thinking about the good times.

you had to control yourself, though, and acknowledge what a piece of trash he was. and that there was no better decision than to stand up and leave as he said. you did not need him anymore either.

"i'll send someone to get my things by the end of this week"

he just nodded, turning his back to you and going on his phone. is this the lowest respect he has left for you? you opened your mouth sligthly, ready to criticise him and tell him one final thing before leaving forever, but you stopped yourself. you were more than that and should not lower yourself to his level.

without further goodbyes, you left your ex boyfriend house and walked down the steps, holding your tears back still.

you kept your head down as you walked through the streets, trying to ignore the tightening in your chest. the cool evening air nipped at your skin, but it wasn’t enough to numb the ache growing inside you. each step felt heavier than the last, the weight of everything pressing down like an anchor.

you didn’t want to cry. not here. not now.

the sidewalk was quiet, just the occasional hum of a car passing by, but even in the stillness, your thoughts screamed louder. you had done the right thing. you had to believe that. but it didn’t feel like it. each memory flashed in your mind like cruel reminders—the laughter, the stolen glances, the small moments that felt too perfect to be real. and maybe they never were.

your eyes burned, but you blinked the tears away. you couldn’t fall apart now, not in the middle of the street where anyone could see.

as the familiar path towards the han river stretched out in front of you, your phone buzzed in your pocket. you hesitated for a moment, thumb hovering over the screen, before pressing call. you needed to hear a voice, something to ground you, to remind you that you weren’t completely alone.

"hello?" sunoo’s voice was soft, and for a second, you could almost pretend nothing was wrong. almost.

“hey…” your voice came out shakier than you wanted, and you bit your lip, trying to steady it.

"you okay?" he asked, instantly picking up on the tremor. his concern wrapped around you like a blanket, but it only made it harder to keep your composure.

you swallowed hard, fingers curling tightly around your phone. "i’m fine. just needed to… hear someone."

there was a pause, the kind that made you wonder if he was trying to find the right words or if he already knew. “what did he do again?”

his question hit like a punch to the gut, and before you could stop it, a sob broke through your chest, loud and raw, spilling out into the night air. you clamped your hand over your mouth, as if that would stop the rest from coming, but it was too late.

sunoo’s voice immediately softened, "hey, hey… it's okay. i’m here. talk to me."

you tried to speak, but the words wouldn’t come. your legs felt weak, and you had to stop, leaning against a lamppost to steady yourself. everything felt too much—too loud, too painful, too real.

"where are you?" sunoo asked gently. you could hear the worry creeping into his voice, but he wasn’t pushing you. he never did.

you wiped at your cheeks, hating the way your breath kept catching in your throat. "the bridge," you whispered. "i’m going to the han river bridge."

“okay, stay there. i’m coming to you, alright?” he was already moving, you could hear it in his voice, the rush of footsteps in the background. "just hold on."

you nodded even though he couldn’t see. "i’m sorry," you managed to say, voice breaking again. you didn’t even know what you were apologizing for—maybe for calling him, for crying like this, for not being stronger.

"don’t be sorry," sunoo said softly. "you don’t have to do this alone. i’m almost there."

you lowered the phone and took a deep breath, staring out at the darkening sky. the han river was just ahead, the faint shimmer of water in the distance. you’d been here so many times before, but tonight it felt different—like everything had changed. like you had changed.

you stood by the railing of the bridge, eyes unfocused as you stared out at the water. the river moved slowly beneath the soft glow of the streetlights, but your mind was far from the calm that surrounded you. it kept pulling you back—back to him, to his words, to the way everything seemed to fall apart in such a quiet, brutal way.

people walked past, some alone, some in pairs, their footsteps light against the pavement. you could feel their glances, brief but piercing, as if they could see through you, as if they knew. you shifted your weight, trying to make yourself smaller, to hide the mess you felt like, but it only made the knot in your chest tighter. your face was still warm and damp from crying, and you wiped at it quickly, telling yourself to get it together.

“come on,” you muttered under your breath, taking in a shaky breath. “be strong. you have to be strong.”

but the words felt hollow, like they were just something to say because you didn’t know how else to pull yourself out of this. everything hurt, and even though you told yourself over and over again that you were fine, that you were better off without him, it didn’t stop the ache from settling deeper.

you closed your eyes, leaning forward on the railing, letting the cool wind brush against your skin. maybe, just for a moment, you could let yourself fall apart. no one would notice, right? no one would—

and then, out of the corner of your eye, you saw it—something familiar. you turned your head slowly, gaze catching on a figure walking towards you. the first thing you noticed was the coat—black and slightly oversized, the one you’d seen so many times before. the way it hung loosely on his frame, sleeves too long for his delicate hands. then the hair, that familiar mess of dark strands that somehow always looked perfect in its disarray.

sunoo.

he wasn’t rushing, but his steps had a purpose, his eyes already locked on you. and for a second, everything around you seemed to blur. there was something comforting in his presence, something that made your heart ache a little less, even though you hadn’t said a word yet. but then, as he got closer, you noticed something else—something unfamiliar.

in his hand, he was holding a small bouquet of flowers, wrapped carefully in soft blue paper. delicate, pale blue peonies peeked out from the wrapping, their soft petals almost glowing in the dim light of the streetlamps. you blinked, caught off guard by the sight. despite the familiar comfort of seeing him, there was something so unexpected, so tender, in the way he held them.

sunoo reached you, his breath a little uneven from the walk, but his expression was calm, his eyes soft as he looked at you. he said nothing at first, just standing there with you, offering his presence like an anchor. but it was the flowers that kept drawing your gaze.

“you okay?” he asked, voice low and gentle, like he didn’t want to break whatever fragile moment this was.

you opened your mouth to speak, but the words tangled in your throat. instead, you shook your head, unable to stop the tears from welling up again.

sunoo didn’t waste a second. as soon as he saw the tears welling up in your eyes again, he gently placed the bouquet down on the ground and stepped forward, wrapping his arms around you in a way that felt so natural, like he’d been waiting for this moment to be there for you. his embrace was firm but soft, and before you could think, your face was pressed against his chest, his warmth enveloping you. his hand found its way to the back of your head, fingers threading through your hair as he pulled you even closer. he rested his chin on top of your head, the steady rise and fall of his breathing a quiet reminder that you weren’t alone.

“it’s okay,” he whispered, his voice barely more than a breath against your hair. “you don’t have to say anything. i’m here. i’ve got you.”

his hand stroked your hair in gentle motions, like he was trying to smooth out the chaos inside you with each pass of his fingers. you didn’t resist, letting yourself melt into him, the tension you’d been carrying for so long slowly unraveling in his arms. you could feel his heart beating steadily against your cheek, and somehow, that rhythm made everything seem a little less terrifying. his scent wrapped around you—clean and familiar, with the faintest trace of something warm, like vanilla. it filled your senses, grounding you, reminding you that not everything was lost.

“you’re not alone anymore,” sunoo murmured, his voice low but strong. “whatever happens, whatever this is… you don’t have to carry it by yourself. i’ll be here, no matter what. i promise.”

you didn’t say anything, just pressed your face deeper into his chest, your fingers clutching at the fabric of his coat like it was the only thing keeping you standing. his words soaked into you, each one like a small stitch, trying to pull together the pieces of you that had been so brutally torn apart.

“i don’t know what happened,” he continued, his hand still moving slowly through your hair. “and i don’t need to know right now. all that matters is that you’re safe, and i’ll protect you from here on out. whatever it takes.”

his chin shifted slightly against your head, and you could feel the way his breath stirred your hair as he spoke. there was something so steady, so unshakable about the way he held you, like he was a wall between you and the rest of the world. you didn’t have to be strong right now, not with him. it was like all the weight you’d been carrying was finally allowed to fall.

“sunoo…” your voice cracked as you finally spoke, muffled against his chest. the words felt heavy, like they’d been trapped inside you for too long. “it’s over now. it just… ended.”

saying it out loud made it real, and the reality hit like a wave, crashing down with a force you weren’t ready for. your body shook as the sobs finally came, no longer silent, no longer restrained. you cried into his chest, letting everything out—everything you had been holding in, all the pain, all the confusion, all the love you didn’t know how to let go of.

sunoo tightened his hold on you, one hand pressing gently to your back, keeping you close, as if he could shield you from the hurt with his touch alone. “i know… i know,” he whispered softly, his voice trembling just a little, but he never wavered. “let it out. you don’t have to be strong right now. i’m here.”

he didn’t let go. not once. and in that moment, you let yourself believe him. you let yourself believe that maybe, just maybe, you didn’t have to go through this alone. in his arms, with the sound of his heartbeat in your ears and his warmth surrounding you, the world didn’t feel as cold.

sunoo held you for a while longer, his chin still resting on your head as he let you cry in his arms. but as the minutes passed, the air around you began to grow colder, the last traces of sunlight disappearing beyond the horizon. he felt the slight shiver that ran through you and pulled back gently, just enough to look at you, concern flickering in his eyes.

"it’s getting dark," he said softly, brushing a stray tear from your cheek with his thumb. "and cold. let’s get you home and warm up, okay? i’ll take care of everything. i promise, you won’t be alone tonight."

there was something so reassuring in the way he said it, so sure and steady, that you found yourself nodding without hesitation. the thought of being alone, of walking back to an empty apartment with nothing but the echo of tonight’s heartbreak, made you feel even more fragile. but with sunoo, even just for now, you didn’t have to face that emptiness.

he smiled at your nod, that small, gentle smile of his that always seemed to bring a little light, even in moments like this. "come on, let’s go."

as he bent down to pick up the bouquet from the ground, you watched him for a moment, noticing how careful he was with the flowers, as if they were something precious. then, without a word, he slipped his arm around your shoulders, his touch warm and solid, guiding you gently as you leaned into him. you were still shaky, still sobbing quietly, but his presence made it just a little easier to take each step.

you rested your head on his shoulder as you walked, the weight of your grief still heavy, but his steady pace gave you something to hold on to. he led you to his car, the soft click of the remote unlocking the doors breaking the quiet of the night. when you reached the passenger side, he paused, opening the door for you with a care that felt so... intentional, like every movement was meant to make you feel safe.

"here," he said softly, helping you into the seat. he carefully set the bouquet in the back, the blue flowers almost glowing in the dim light from the streetlamps, before closing your door with a soft thud.

you watched him circle around the car, your eyes tracing his familiar figure as he moved, his hair slightly tousled from the breeze, the faint shadows of exhaustion under his eyes. when he slid into the driver’s seat, he turned to you with that same gentle smile, though there was a flicker of worry behind it.

"let’s go," he said quietly, and the engine purred to life as he started the car, the low hum filling the space between you.

you leaned your head against the window, feeling the cool glass press against your skin, your gaze drifting up towards the night sky. the stars were faint, scattered against the dark canvas of the city, but they were there, blinking quietly in the distance. you focused on them, using their distant light to hold yourself together, to keep the tears at bay. you didn’t want to cry anymore, not here, not in front of him.

the car moved smoothly through the streets, the soft glow of passing streetlights flickering over your face. you could feel sunoo’s eyes on you, stealing glances when he thought you weren’t noticing. but you felt it—his worry, his care, the way he was watching over you even in the smallest moments. every so often, he would adjust his grip on the steering wheel, his hand moving effortlessly between the controls, and you found yourself oddly comforted by the sight. there was something undeniably calming about the way he drove, like he was in control of everything, even when the world felt like it was falling apart around you.

after a while, you felt the softest touch—a gentle pressure on your hand. you looked down and saw sunoo’s hand resting on yours, which had been resting limply on your thigh. his touch was warm, his fingers wrapping lightly around yours, anchoring you to the moment.

"it’s going to be okay," he whispered, his voice barely audible over the quiet hum of the engine. "i promise."

you couldn’t bring yourself to respond, not yet, but something in his touch, in his words, soothed the ache just a little. you stared out the window again, watching the city lights blur past as the car made its way through the familiar streets. despite the heaviness inside you, there was a strange sense of peace in this moment—in his presence, in the quiet reassurance he gave without asking anything in return.

every now and then, you caught the way his hand moved on the steering wheel, the light reflecting off his skin as he handled the car with one hand, the other still resting protectively on yours. there was something about the way he drove, the quiet confidence in each movement, that made you feel... safe. not just physically, but in a way that went deeper, as if he could handle whatever came next, as long as he was by your side.

you let out a shaky breath, your tears drying on your cheeks, and leaned back into the seat, the weight of the night still heavy but no longer unbearable. and for the first time in what felt like forever, you let yourself believe—just a little—that maybe it really would be okay.

before you even realized it, you had arrived at the entrance of your apartment’s parking lot. the streetlights cast long, hazy shadows on the ground, and the gentle hum of the car's engine began to fade as sunoo effortlessly turned it off. he glanced at you one last time before you stepped out, his eyes brimming with quiet hope and an encouraging smile that seemed to say, “you’re not alone in this.”without hesitation, he got out of the car and hurried around to your side, not giving you a chance to move on your own. he opened the door for you, his attention entirely focused on you and nothing else. with gentle hands, he helped you out of the car, and as you stood up, he carefully reached into the backseat to retrieve the bouquet of flowers.

you fumbled for your keys in your pocket, your hands still shaky from the tears that hadn't fully dried. sunoo noticed, of course he did, and with that same tenderness, he took the keys from you, his fingers brushing yours in a way that made you feel like he was absorbing some of the weight you carried. "i’ve got it," he whispered, his voice a soft promise. he unlocked the door and nudged it open, but he didn’t step in first. no, he let you take that step—letting you lead in your own space, your sanctuary that felt strangely foreign at this moment.

you walked in, the familiar scent of home greeting you, but everything felt too still, too quiet. the weight of the day hung in the air, pressing down on your chest as you stood there, unsure of what to do next. sunoo closed the door softly behind you and, without saying a word, helped you slip off your coat. his movements were slow, deliberate, as if he wanted to shield you from even the smallest discomfort. he guided you gently toward the sofa, the only thing that seemed to belong in the room right now.

"how about you sit here for a while," he whispered, his voice as soothing as the night itself, "i’ll make us some tea, something warm to help you feel better." and before you could respond, he was already in the kitchen, the sound of cabinets opening and the quiet clinking of mugs filling the silence that you hadn’t noticed until then. the soft whir of the kettle began, blending with the faint shuffle of his feet on the kitchen floor. it was comforting, these small noises of someone taking care of you, the way he always knew what you needed before you even realized it yourself.

you sank into the sofa, eyes falling on the bouquet now resting on the coffee table. they were beautiful, untouched by the sadness in your heart, as if they held onto the light that seemed so distant from you. the warmth of the room, the soft glow from the lamps sunoo had turned on without you noticing, everything began to feel less overwhelming, even just for a moment.

sunoo came back, holding two steaming mugs, the rich scent of tea swirling around you. he set them down carefully next to the flowers before settling beside you, close enough that his presence was a balm against the storm inside you. without a word, he opened his arms, and you collapsed into him, your body shaking as the tears returned. he held you tighter, one hand stroking your back in soothing circles, his voice a quiet hum of comfort. "it’s going to be okay, y/n," he murmured, "i’m here. i’ll always be here.

and for a second—just a second—you believed him. the warmth of his chest, the steady beat of his heart, the safety of his embrace made everything feel less terrifying. you burrowed deeper into his arms, letting the soft fabric of his hoodie and the strength of his hold anchor you. you looked up at him through tear-streaked lashes, his face illuminated by the soft lamplight. his words, his presence, made you feel like maybe, just maybe, everything would be alright.

sunoo didn’t say a word at first. he didn’t need to. his arms tightened around you, holding you as if he could shield you from the sadness that clung to you. he rested his chin on the top of your head, his steady breathing a rhythm that slowly started to soothe the chaos swirling inside you. his fingers gently threaded through your hair, soft strokes, as if each touch was meant to remind you he was there, that he wasn’t going anywhere.

"it’s okay, let it out," he whispered, his voice barely above a breath, but filled with so much warmth it almost made your chest ache. "i’m here. i’ll stay as long as you need me." his words weren’t rushed or forced, just a quiet truth, something solid in the midst of all the uncertainty that weighed down on you.

you could feel the wetness of your tears soaking through his hoodie, but he didn’t seem to care. he only held you closer, his hand moving to cradle the back of your head, guiding it into the curve of his neck. you felt so small in his arms, but somehow, the pain felt a little less suffocating. the ache in your heart was still there, throbbing with every beat, but sunoo’s warmth kept you grounded, kept you from feeling like you were drowning.

"i know it hurts," he murmured into your hair, his breath warm against your scalp, "but you don’t have to go through it alone, okay? we’ll get through this together. i’ve got you." his voice cracked just the tiniest bit at the end, and you realized how much it hurt him to see you like this. but there wasn’t a trace of frustration or helplessness in his touch, only unwavering patience.

time seemed to stretch on endlessly, the minutes blending together as you cried into his arms. the room was still, the only sounds the faint ticking of the clock and your quiet sobs, slowly easing into shallow breaths. you clung to him, needing the solidness of his body, the reassurance of his touch.

"it’s going to be okay," he repeated softly, like a mantra. "i promise, y/n. i’ll be here every step of the way." he shifted slightly, just enough to pull you closer, his hand now cupping your cheek, brushing away the tears with the pad of his thumb. his eyes, warm and filled with nothing but concern, searched your face, making sure you were really there, really okay.

"i know it doesn’t feel like it right now," he continued, his voice barely above a whisper, "but one day, it won’t hurt as much. and when that day comes, you’ll look back and see how strong you are. but until then, lean on me. i’ll carry as much of this for you as i can."

his words washed over you like a balm, his presence a refuge from the pain that felt too heavy to bear. you didn’t have the strength to respond, but you didn’t need to. sunoo understood. he always did. he pressed a soft kiss to the top of your head, his lips lingering there for a moment longer than usual, as if trying to seal his promise with that one tender gesture.

slowly, the sobs subsided, leaving behind a quiet, aching stillness. your breathing steadied, and though the pain hadn’t left, it felt more bearable in the cocoon of his arms. you rested your head against his chest, listening to the soft, steady rhythm of his heartbeat, and let yourself be held, let yourself find comfort in his unwavering presence.

"just stay here with me," you whispered, your voice shaky and fragile. "don’t leave."

sunoo hugged you even tighter, his chin resting on your shoulder now. "i’m not going anywhere," he whispered back, his voice filled with so much certainty that, for the first time in what felt like forever, you believed him. you closed your eyes, letting yourself melt into his embrace, and for a brief moment, the heartbreak seemed distant, something outside the walls of this small, quiet world the two of you had created.

slowly, the tension in your body eased as you stayed wrapped in his arms, the warmth of his chest steady against your cheek. you let out a shaky breath, feeling a small sliver of calm begin to take root amidst the chaos. sunoo's presence was enough, his quiet reassurances and the gentle rhythm of his breathing pulling you back from the edge of your heartbreak. after a moment, you pulled back slightly, enough to lift your head and meet his gaze.

sunoo’s hand moved gently from your back to your face, his fingers tracing the line of your jaw with the same delicate care he’d shown all night. he tilted your chin up slightly, his eyes searching yours with an intensity that made your breath catch. the room felt impossibly quiet, like the world outside had faded completely, leaving only the two of you in this small, warm space.

“you know,” he began softly, his voice barely above a whisper, “i’ve always admired you. not just for how strong you are… but for everything else. your kindness. your smile. the way you care for others, even when you’re hurting.”

his thumb brushed lightly across your cheek, the touch so tender that it made your heart stutter. “you don’t even realize how special you are, do you?” he asked, his eyes softening as they moved over your face, taking in every detail as if he wanted to memorize you in this moment. “and not just on the inside… you’re beautiful. you always have been.”

his words sank into you, deeper than you expected, and you felt a warmth bloom in your chest, something soft but undeniable. it was like he was seeing through all the pain, all the exhaustion, to the person you weren’t sure was still there anymore. and for the first time in a while, you felt seen. truly seen.

his hand stayed on your cheek, his palm warm against your skin, and you found yourself leaning into it slightly, as if you couldn’t help but be drawn closer to him. there was something magnetic about him in this moment—the way his gaze held yours, the way his touch seemed to chase away the cold that had been sitting inside you all night. you felt a strange pull, a quiet longing that you didn’t quite know how to name, but it was there, growing with every second you spent in his arms.

sunoo’s thumb brushed across your lips, just the faintest touch, but it sent a shiver through you. “i’m sorry you’ve been through so much,” he murmured, his voice even softer now. “but i promise… i’ll be here. i’ll always be here.”

there was something in his eyes, something deeper, that made your breath hitch in your throat. it wasn’t just reassurance anymore—there was a tenderness there, a kind of closeness that went beyond simple comfort. it felt like he was opening up a part of himself to you, something that had always been there, just waiting for you to notice.

and you did notice. suddenly, you were acutely aware of how close he was, of how his hand cradled your face with such care, of the way his gaze flickered down to your lips for just a split second before meeting your eyes again. the pull between you grew stronger, an invisible thread drawing you closer, until it was impossible to ignore.

your heart raced as you watched him, your mind spinning with the realization that you weren’t just seeking comfort anymore—you were seeking him. the closeness, the warmth, the way his words made you feel seen and understood… it all made you want to close the distance, to move closer, to let yourself fall into this strange but undeniable connection.

sunoo’s breath was shaky as he leaned in, his lips brushing against yours so softly, it was almost like a question. the kiss was light, tentative, and for a moment, you froze. your eyes widened, surprised by the suddenness of it, your heart skipping a beat. it wasn’t what you had expected, not tonight, not like this. but even in your surprise, you didn’t pull away.

his lips were warm, soft, and his touch was so gentle it felt like he was afraid of pushing too far. but you didn’t move. you didn’t want to. something inside you was holding you there, caught in the moment, unable to back away.

sunoo pulled back first, his eyes wide with realization. “oh—i’m sorry,” he stammered, his voice full of regret. “i didn’t mean to… i didn’t want to make you uncomfortable.” his hands moved to your shoulders, as if to steady you, his eyes full of worry. “i shouldn’t have—”

but before he could finish, you found yourself reaching for him. your fingers brushed his cheek, stopping him mid-sentence. your mind was still reeling, but your heart knew what it wanted. without thinking, you leaned in, closing the gap between you. this time, the kiss wasn’t a question. it was an answer.

your lips met his softly at first, a gentle press that quickly deepened into something more. it wasn’t rushed or urgent, but it was full of emotion—a quiet desperation, a need for closeness that had been building all night. sunoo’s hands moved from your shoulders to your waist, pulling you gently towards him as his lips moved with yours in a slow, careful rhythm.

you felt his warmth seep into you, the soft heat of his hands as they slid up from your waist to your sides, his touch careful but sure. each movement was filled with tenderness, his fingers brushing your skin like he was afraid to break the moment, but at the same time, unable to let go.

your own hands found their way to his face, your fingers tangling gently in his hair as you kissed him back, matching his slow, steady pace. it was like nothing else existed in the world—just the two of you, the quiet hum of the room, and the soft press of his lips against yours. the warmth of him, the safety you felt in his arms, was overwhelming. you hadn’t realized how much you’d needed this—needed him—until now.

sunoo’s hands moved again, this time one slipping up to cup your face, his thumb brushing lightly over your cheek as he kissed you, his touch so full of care that it made your chest ache in the best way. the other hand stayed on your waist, holding you close, anchoring you to him in a way that felt both protective and intimate.

you could feel his heart racing, the steady thrum beneath his skin matching the rhythm of your own. there was something so gentle, so patient, in the way he kissed you, like he was taking his time, making sure every moment was soft, every touch full of meaning. his lips moved slowly, carefully, as if he wanted to savor every second of this closeness.

the kiss deepened, but never lost its gentleness. his hand moved from your face to your hair, his fingers threading through the strands as he kissed you with a quiet intensity. every touch, every soft brush of his lips, made you feel warmer, safer, like the world outside didn’t matter as long as he was here with you.

you melted into him, your body softening against his as the kiss continued, slow and tender. his hands explored your sides, your back, his touch never straying too far, but always grounding you in the moment. you felt cherished, held in a way that made you believe, if only for now, that everything would be okay.

eventually, the kiss slowed, but neither of you pulled away. your foreheads rested together, breaths mingling as you stayed close, his hands still cradling you gently. sunoo’s eyes fluttered open, meeting yours with a softness that made your heart ache all over again.

“i… i don’t know what this means,” he whispered, his voice barely audible, “but… i’m here. and i’ll keep being here… as long as you need me.”

his words, the warmth of his body pressed against yours, the quiet comfort of being held—it all made you feel something you hadn’t felt in a long time. safe. wanted. and maybe, just maybe, like you could let yourself fall into this, into him, without fear.

the room felt suspended in time, the quiet hum of the city outside dimming until it was just the two of you, lost in each other’s presence. your head rested on sunoo’s chest, the steady rise and fall of his breathing soothing, like the softest lullaby. you looked up at him, meeting his gaze, and a small smile tugged at your lips. there was something so tender in the way he looked back at you, his eyes full of warmth and affection that made your heart flutter.

sunoo’s arms tightened around you, pulling you closer, as if he couldn’t bear the thought of letting you go. his voice was soft, barely above a whisper, but it filled the space between you with a kind of sweetness that made your chest feel light.

“you’re so beautiful,” he murmured, his hand gently caressing your arm, his thumb brushing over your skin in slow, soothing strokes. “i’ve always thought so… even when you don’t see it yourself.”

his words made your smile widen, a warmth blooming inside you that you hadn’t felt in a long time. you nestled closer to him, your heart beating steadily in time with his. it was easy to get lost in this moment, the way he held you, the way his voice was like a soft caress against your skin.

“you deserve so much more,” he continued, his eyes never leaving yours. “more love, more happiness. and i’ll make sure you have that. even if it’s just for tonight, i’ll give you everything i can.”

his forehead rested against yours for a moment, his breath mingling with yours, his fingers still trailing gently up and down your arm. it felt like you were in your own little world, shielded from the rest of the universe by the warmth of his embrace. sunoo kissed your forehead softly, his lips lingering there for a few seconds, as if trying to absorb every ounce of pain you had carried. his other hand slipped up to cradle your face, his thumb brushing lightly across your cheek as he kissed you there again, whispering sweet nothings into your skin.

you couldn’t help but smile, the soft affection between you making your heart swell. without thinking, you leaned up and pressed your lips to his again, just a quick peck, something so innocent yet full of meaning. when you pulled back, sunoo chuckled softly, his eyes crinkling in the corners as a small laugh escaped you too.

for a moment, everything was light again, like the weight of the world had been lifted. but then the silence settled over you once more, and you found yourselves staring into each other’s eyes, the connection between you deepening with every second that passed. the air felt charged with something you couldn’t quite name, something that made your heart race and your breath hitch.

you leaned in first this time, and your lips met his again, the kiss soft but full of emotion. sunoo’s arms tightened around you, and you felt his body shift slightly, his hand coming up to cradle the back of your head as he kissed you back with a slow, deliberate tenderness. it wasn’t rushed, but it was filled with a kind of quiet longing that made your heart skip a beat.

somehow, without either of you realizing it, you found yourselves shifting positions. sunoo moved carefully, his hands never leaving your body as he gently guided you back onto the sofa. you sank into the cushions, your back pressed against the soft fabric, and sunoo hovered above you, his knees on either side of your hips as he leaned down, his lips brushing yours again. he was careful, keeping most of his weight off you, his body hovering close but never pressing down.

the kiss deepened, his lips moving against yours in a slow, intoxicating rhythm. his hands slid from your waist to your sides, his touch gentle but full of purpose, like he was savoring every moment of this closeness. you could feel the heat of his body above you, the warmth of his breath against your skin, and it made your head spin in the best way.

your hands found their way to his shoulders, then his neck, pulling him closer as the kiss grew more passionate. it wasn’t rushed, but there was a quiet urgency between you now, a need to feel more of each other, to hold on tighter to this moment. sunoo’s lips left yours for just a second, trailing down to the curve of your jaw, then to the soft skin of your neck. his kisses were light, tentative, like he was testing the waters, waiting for your response.

you didn’t pull away, didn’t flinch. instead, you let your hands slide into his hair, your fingers tangling gently in the strands as his lips brushed against your skin. the sensation sent a shiver through you, but it wasn’t uncomfortable—it was something else entirely, something warm and inviting.

sunoo must have felt it too, because after a moment, he returned to your lips, capturing them in another slow, tender kiss. this time, his hands moved up to cradle your face, his thumbs brushing gently across your cheeks as he kissed you with the same gentle intensity as before. there was something so soft, so reassuring in his touch, like he was reminding you that he was here, that you weren’t alone anymore.

between kisses, his lips hovered just above yours, his breath warm against your skin as he whispered, “your touch… it’s unlike anything i’ve ever felt before. it’s like… you were made for this, for being held like this.”

his words made your chest tighten, your heart swelling with something you couldn’t quite name. the tenderness in his voice, the way he spoke to you like you were the most precious thing in the world, made you feel more seen and more cherished than you had in a long time.

you kissed him again, your lips seeking his with a newfound hunger, and sunoo responded in kind, his hands moving from your face to your waist, then back up to your sides, cradling you gently as if you were something fragile. each kiss was slow, deliberate, filled with a kind of care that made you feel safe, protected. his lips moved with yours in perfect sync, the connection between you growing deeper with every passing second.

the warmth of his body, the softness of his touch, the gentle rhythm of his kisses—it all made you feel like you were floating, like you were wrapped in a cocoon of comfort and affection that you never wanted to leave. and in that moment, as you lay there with sunoo, the world outside faded away completely, leaving only the two of you, lost in each other’s touch, in each other’s warmth.

as you lay beneath him, the gentle rhythm of his lips on yours began to stir something deeper inside. the tenderness, the warmth—it was no longer enough. there was a magnetic pull, a craving that grew with every brush of his lips. you felt it in the way sunoo’s hands roamed your sides, a bit more deliberate, his fingers pressing slightly harder as though he too was feeling the same urgency between you.

sunoo’s kisses trailed lower, down your jaw to your neck, and you couldn’t help the soft sigh that escaped you. he was so careful, his lips barely grazing your skin at first, then growing bolder, leaving a trail of delicate, wet kisses down the curve of your neck. your hands slid up into his hair, tangling in the soft strands, encouraging him as he moved, his lips pressing deeper, lingering longer, until you felt the faintest tug of teeth.

his breath was warm against your skin, his kisses shifting lower as he pulled at the collar of your blouse, just enough to expose your collarbone. your heart raced as he kissed there, the sensation of his lips making your body respond in ways that made your chest tighten. sunoo’s kisses were slow and intentional, his mouth working its way across your skin, each kiss sending a ripple of warmth through you.

his lips hovered for a moment, just beneath your ear, and he whispered softly, “i want to take care of you… all of you.”

the words sent a shiver down your spine, a shiver that only deepened when his mouth returned to your neck, leaving the faintest of marks in his wake, barely noticeable but there, a silent claim. your breath hitched as his lips found the hollow at the base of your throat, and he pulled your blouse aside a little more, giving himself access to your collarbone. his kisses there were slower, wetter, each one pulling a small, soft gasp from you.

your fingers trembled as they made their way to the hem of his hoodie, your mind spinning with the heat of his touch. you hesitated for a moment, your fingers pausing, but the craving to feel more of him—his warmth, his skin—overpowered any doubts. with a slow, tentative movement, you tugged the fabric up, exposing the firm muscles beneath.

sunoo’s body was sculpted, each line of his chest and abs defined, and your gaze was instantly drawn to the sight of him. he noticed your stare, a soft chuckle escaping him, his lips curling into a small smirk that made your heart race even faster. he grabbed your hand, his touch gentle yet firm, and guided it to his chest. pressing your palm flat against the hard planes of his skin, he leaned in, his voice low, teasing.

“go on,” he murmured, his lips brushing your ear. “i’m not going anywhere.”

the warmth of his skin under your fingers was electric, his heart beating steadily beneath your touch. you smiled, feeling more confident, and sunoo’s smirk only deepened as he watched you, his gaze never leaving yours.

before you could think twice, you shifted positions again, moving so that you were straddling him, your legs on either side of his hips. his back rested against the sofa, his hands finding your waist, holding you steady as you moved on top of him. your heart pounded in your chest, the intimacy of the moment overwhelming, but the way sunoo’s hands gripped your hips, the way his lips found your shoulder, made you feel like you were exactly where you belonged.

he leaned in, his mouth once again trailing a line of slow, wet kisses down your shoulder and across your collarbone. the space he had exposed earlier was now his playground, and every kiss, every press of his lips, sent a new wave of heat rushing through you. your breath came in shallow gasps, your hands gripping his shoulders as he worked his way lower, his kisses more insistent, more demanding.

with trembling fingers, you reached for the hem of your blouse, pulling it over your head and letting it fall to the floor. you wanted to give him more—more access, more of yourself. the vulnerability of the moment was overwhelming, but sunoo’s touch, his gaze, made you feel safe.

his hands slid from your waist to your back, his fingers tracing the curve of your spine as his lips moved back up to meet yours. there was a hunger now, a shared desire that neither of you could deny. his kisses were deeper, more passionate, his hands gripping your waist as if to ground himself in the heat of the moment.

the heat between you was palpable, the desire undeniable, yet sunoo remained so careful, so attentive to your every move, every reaction. his lips found yours again, and the kiss deepened, his hands roaming your body as he held you close. and in that moment, everything else faded away—the pain, the heartbreak, the doubt. all that remained was the warmth of his body, the softness of his lips, and the undeniable pull that drew you closer to him with every touch.

“you look so beautiful tonight,” he whispered, staring down at your exposed cleavage, the only obstacle keeping him away from your tits being a piece of laced bra. sunoo couldn’t help but smirked, making eye contact with you again before turning you around, your back against his chest. he led you to lean on him, his hands trailing invisible lines on your stomach and reaching the bra wire. “will you let me?” he whispered into your ear.

you nodded, in the intensity of the moment, and threw your head back on his shoulder when his hands found their way under your bra and cupped your tits, sending you butterflies. his hands were firm on your chest, but not forceful. you bit your lower lip as his index fingers touched your nipples each, crossing your legs in response. sunoo smiled at the notice of that, realising he’s just found one of your sensitive spots. his fingers continued teasing your buds, as a heat started to grow between your legs, the sense of wetness being more and more intense.

“do you want me to go harder on them or is this just perfect?” he whispered again, gently continuing with his play. he couldn’t get tired of it, your nipples felt just right between his fingers, your tits fitting in his hands just perfectly, finding their own new owner. “i like it like that” you barely said, afraid to escape a light moan. sunoo nodded, not changing his rhythm or strength on you, fulfilling all of your desires.

feeling your ass keep moving on his lap, the bulge inside his pants started to get more and more noticeable. you felt his hardness pressing against you, a testament to his perpetual attraction to your body. eager to show him your mutual affection, you pressed harder against him, keeping your lips shut with your teeth, holding your whines back. the way his hardened part pushed into your thin leggings caused more wetness to add up, an ocean in your panties.

“you turn me on so much” he confessed, unable to control his whining. his hands slowly left your tits in place, following to open your bra from behind, the piece of cloth falling hopelessly on the floor. “more reasons for my hands to hold you close” sunoo whispered, “but i think there’s something else that wants to be held too”

unhesitant, his right hand went down your body, reaching your most sensitive part. he used two fingers to trail a line between your legs, slowly, firmly, just the right way to tease every single bit of you. then the line turned into a circle, your clit being triggered every few seconds, and your moans couldn’t be hidden anymore. you opened your legs apart, giving him more access to your needy cunt, screaming for his touch under the piece of cloth. he noticed so, and pressed harder until your folds were holding onto the leggings, taking the shape of your perfect pussy.

“so pretty” he whispered softly inside you ear, sending the now-lost-number of shivers from today, through your whole body. his voice sounded incredible itself, but his whispering awakened a whole new emotion within you. sunoo could not take a break from feeling your wetness in his hand, his impatient fingers pushing the leggings harder inside you. "do you want more, y/n?" he gave you the right to choose like the gentleman he is and you nodded in response, unable to control yourself.

it only took a second for him to process your answer and stand up while letting you fall, carefully, on the sofa. his figure was so beautiful in the dim light, every line forming his abs almost shadowing his body in small places. his straight shoulder added more masculinity to his aura while his permanent smirk went down your body, his head facing your clothed cunt.

"let's take these off" and in the next moment, your leggings were nowhere to be found. his breathe, hot enough, was now making your panties even more soaked. he stuck his playful tongue out, reaching closer to your pussy while his eyes did not leave yours at all, not for a single minute.

you looked down at him and smiled naively, just as his tongue dragged a wet line along your panties, going from bottom to your clit. he paid extra attention to it, giving it an additional lick to end the first round. you trembled at his touch, your lips covered in biting marks now.

impatiently, sunoo pulled your panties aside, a new image raising ahead of him. “you have such a pretty pussy, sweetheart” he whispered again, giving it a quick lick to make your body shake. he giggled and continued with a second one, this time slower and more precise, his eyes on you still. and then the simple up and down line became a whole maze, his adventurous tongue exploring every single bit of you. and as he felt his tongue wasn’t doing enough to satisfy his taste, sunoo started taking your cunt inside his mouth, feeling your flavour down his throat.

he rolled his eyes back at the taste of that and continued to eat you hungrily, moaning inside you. his hands were now holding onto your thighs firmly, dragging them closer so we could bury his face deeper inside you. on the other side, you threw your head back, whining his name aloud. without hesitation, you pushed his head deeper inside, only receiving more moans from him. not only his moans were loud, but the way he was eating out, like he has been so starved for your taste for years.

“you taste like sugar” he raised his head to say, winking at you teasingly. you giggled and hid your face behind your hands, shy now more than ever. he noticed so and came closer to your face, his fingers trailing along your inner thighs. “want to feel my fingers, baby?” he asked, biting your earlobe softly, but enough to get a whine out of you. you nodded again, unable to find your words, and that’s all it took for him to push his fingers all the way inside you pussy, without any warnings or adjustments.

“sunoo-ya!!” you screamed, your arms around his neck and gazing at his beautiful, precious smile, which turned into a smirk as his fingers rushed to slide outside and inside you, no break, no question, just him aggressively taking over your cunt. it felt so good words couldn’t be formed anymore, regardless of your tries to call out his name. you couldn’t do anything but stutter, eyes rolling back more and more and arms growing weaker around his neck.

“do you like them inside you?” he asked, almost aware of your impossibility to say a word. you tried to nod, again, but not even that was an option anymore. you clenched around his fingers, legs shaking in pleasure. sunoo left more wet kisses around your neck and collarbone, reaching your breasts again. unlike before, now it was his teeth that teased your nipples, nibbling and playfully pulling them towards him. his mouth, unable to resist, took your left tit inside, sucking on it like a baby. which was way too ironic, considering how ruined your pussy was by now, his fingers still going.

“s-sunoo, please s-stop” you managed to say quietly. “shhhh, baby” he whispered, boob still inside his mouth, licking around it loudly and moaning softly. “tonight i am crazy over you” sunoo confessed, as he finally gave your wetness a break, and licked his fingers. “tastes like….mine” he chuckled, pushing his fingers inside your mouth and making you suck on them. you did so, feeling your own taste inside your mouth and relishing it.

“you ask me to stop but the way you clench around my hand…says something else”

sunoo kissed your forehead and sat down next to you. he dragged you closer into his chest, a solemn will for his care and took your hand inside his, placing a final kiss on your skin. “you make me go crazy over you, y/n” he whispered, feeling your delicate skin around. “i don’t have a condom right now, but if you want me to make you feel good again,” he took a small break, turning around to gaze into your eyes “i’ll make sure to bring you to heaven next time”

can you tell i was listening to moonstruck in the last part? hope you enjoyed and feedback is highly appreciated 🤍

[mysteriaqueen]

Good, right?

Sukuna x Reader Oneshot | Modern/College AU (i guess) | 777 words

Summary: You and Sukuna have been sent to gather the necessary ingredients for some cooking class. And now you're in an empty storage room. By yourselves.

He kissed me. He fucking kissed me.

You throw your arms up awkwardly and freeze. You can feel his lips against yours, warm and gentle. You don’t know how to react. No, you know how to react. You should push him off immediately. There is no universe in which you’d want Ryomen Sukuna kissing you. Except maybe this one.

He pulls back just barely with the most shit-eating grin on his face. So, naturally, you push him away. But what does that mean now?

“Oho, you’re only just now pushing me away. Why? Because now I know you like it?” he asks, smug as hell. “I absolutely did not like that,” you say, rolling your eyes and looking away.

But taking your eyes off him was a mistake. Because now he’s kissing you again, catching you off guard a second time. But this time his hands are on your hips and he presses his chest against yours. He’s warm and that warmth spreads through your body causing your eyes to flutter shut. You barely realize it but he’s kissed you multiple times now. Your awkwardly placed arms have come to rest against his. But once you feel his skin you’ve got enough presence of mind to push him off. And he lets you, stumbling back slightly with a laugh.

Why did I like that????

“What the hell is wrong with you?! God, you’re so weird.” He just rolls his eyes. “I guess you are too.” “What are you talking about?” “You’re over here kissing one of the bullies you claim to despise so much.” “You’re kissing me, and I don’t even like it!” you say with a huff.

He deadpans. “You’re gonna tell me you didn’t like that? After how many times you let me kiss you? With my hands on your waist. I saw how your eyes flutter closed, you know.”

Damn it.

“I was in shock.”

He scoffs. “Yeah, maybe the first time. Just admit it,” he says, stepping closer with the same smirk. “It’s okay if you like it. I’d actually prefer it that way.”

You sigh, closing your eyes (a mistake you haven’t seemed to learn from) and crossing your arms.

“Of course you would, but I don’t mPH-”

Yeah, he’s kissing you. Again. You catch yourself melting the tiniest bit before you pull away. And of course, Sukuna noticed. Your clue for that is that his grin somehow got cockier. Bastard.

“Are you insane?” “Possibly. No more insane than you.” “I don’t go around kissing random people!” “I only do it if I’m gonna enjoy it. And I’m thoroughly enjoying this. As are you,” he says, leaning into you more.

You panic on the inside about how good feels pressing you against the shelves and-

“Back up!”

He obliges. With a smirk, of course.

“You know, repressing your emotions isn’t a good habit to get into.”

You just roll your eyes. You aren’t even trying to, you just want a moment to accept them for yourself. Or reason them away so you can pretend this never happened at all. Is that so wrong?

You sigh, turning towards the exit.

“Listen, I want nothing to do with you. You and your group just get off on terrifying people who are already a little scared of you. Ew.”

You couldn’t hear the quiet footsteps he was taking over your rant. So when his warm body is suddenly right up against your back you gasp. And when he snakes his arm around your waist you stop breathing. And when his chin ends up on your shoulder it takes everything in you not to make an embarrassing noise.

“Wh-” 

You have to cut yourself off because you can barely trust your voice. You can feel his smirk on your neck. You swallow.

“What are you doing?” you whisper. “What does it feel like? Good, right?”

You just about short-circuited after hearing that. Some noise of shock and disapproval came out of your mouth but Sukuna just laughed. After some sort of button-mashing quick-time event in your brain you finally get the presence of mind to try and take control of the situation.

“We’re taking too long. We still have to grab some flour and get back to the demonstration.”

There’s a moment of silence where you’re praying Sukuna will show some mercy. And he does. He actually backs up. Well, of course, he’s laughing the entire time, But a win is a win.

“Fine. I let you off for now. But you know I’m not forgetting about this. It’s only a matter of time until you have to face this again. I’ll make sure of it.”

Masterlist

reblogs and comments appreciated

[padfootagain]

Only an Almost (XVI)

Chapter 16: Fare Well

Hi! Here comes a new chapter!

Okay, time to talk…

Sorry for the angst in advance…

I hope you’ll like this chapter! Please, tell me what you think!

*************************************

Pairing: Hozier x fem!reader, friends with benefits AU

Warning: No explicit smut or nsfw content, but there are sexual themes and heavy make-out sessions (it’s a friends with benefits AU, I can’t really escape it), so 18+ only!

Summary: Andrew has been in love with you for years, and yet he has never confessed his feelings. But a night out celebrating the engagement of his best friend changes everything. However, you don't seem ready to be with him just yet. You make him an offer that he can't refuse... but will certainly regret.

Word Count : 2496

Masterlist for the series – Hozier’s Masterlist – Main Masterlist

This was a terrible idea.

Andrew hesitated one last time before knocking on your door.

This was a terrible idea. He was going to get his heart broken all over again. What was there to discuss anyway? You had met someone else, someone better than him… end of story.

He buried his hands in the pockets of his jacket while he waited for you to open the door. It was springtime, and yet the evening was particularly cold tonight. A clear sky above his head though, all inky and full of stars.

God, he shouldn’t have come…

Finally, the key turned in the lock, and the next second your door was opening. You welcomed him with a timid but earnest smile.

“Hi! Come in… do you want some tea?”

You didn’t wait for his answer, hurried to close the door behind him as if you were worried he would run away. He barely let out a ‘good evening’ that you were off to the kitchen, busying yourself with tea even if it was late already.

Still, he walked in silence in your kitchen, let you get away with the distraction. He waited in silence, unwilling to be the first to speak.

“Here you go,” you added as you handed him the grey mug he loved best. Two teabags. The same ritual you had performed for him hundreds, if not thousands of times…

“Thank you,” his voice was quiet and blank.

The atmosphere was heavy, suffocating, even. His heart was pounding, and Andrew didn’t have the strength to look at you. He shouldn’t have come. Being rejected once was painful enough, he didn’t need you to do it again…

“Thank you for coming tonight,” you said, hesitation making your voice quiet and small. “Do you want to sit down?” you added as you gestured towards the living room, but Andrew shook his head.

“No, I’d rather stand.”

Slowly, you nodded. You remained both standing there, under the pale light of your kitchen, your back to the sink and his to the counter open on the living room. He was still holding his tea, but he didn’t want to drink it. The heat sipping through the porcelain was a good distraction against his tight throat though.

“You… You want to eat something? I have some biscuits…”

“Y/N… thank you, but… I’d rather get this over with.”

You hummed, pulling on your sleeves until they covered your hands. Andrew noticed that you hadn’t made any tea for yourself.

“Right… We should… talk about what happened.”

“Did you go to the date? With Maggie?”

He finally looked up when you remained silent. You seemed taken aback by his question.

“Yeah… Yes, I did.”

“Did you sleep with her?”

“Andy!”

“What? We’re close enough for us to have sex, but I can’t know if you’ve found someone else?”

You shifted your weight from one foot to the other. He was getting annoyed by all this, angry even. Andrew longed for this to be over, for him to go home, get threateningly drunk, maybe smoke a joint or two to make sure he could numb the pain, and forget for a few hours that you existed.

And tomorrow he would get up, and pretend that all was fine, and he would do that again and again until he could think of you without wanting to cry…

“No, we didn’t sleep together.”

“How was the date?”

“Do you really want to know?”

“Yes, I do.”

You heaved a sigh.

“I stayed a grand total of fifteen minutes…”

He frowned at that.

“Really?”

“It felt wrong.”

You added nothing to that statement, and Andrew didn’t know what to do with it. Wrong because your date wasn’t nice? Or wrong because you wanted someone else?

“Did you see her again?”

“No… no, and I don’t think I will.”

“Why not?”

You shifted again, clearly uncomfortable.

“Look, Andy… this isn’t why I wanted to see you…”

“Really? Why, then?”

“You… you ran off. When I told you, you simply… ran off. I… I’m sorry. I should have handled this better, I… I know that I didn’t break the news in the best way. I was scared of how you would react.”

He raised an unimpressed eyebrow.

“Did you ever think that I could react well to you dumping my arse?”

“I didn’t dump you…”

“Really?”

“No, because we were not together.”

Andrew clenched his jaw, put down his untouched tea on the counter behind him. He averted his gaze, crossed his arms before his chest.

“I’m sorry, Andy. I should have handled that situation better. You… you’re important to me. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to cause you pain.”

God, he didn’t know if he ought to cry or laugh at that.

“I know that I should have found a better way to tell you about this. But I… I hope that we can still be friends…”

“Friends?!”

He looked up again, stared at you with his mouth hanging open.

Friends?!

“No, Y/N. We’re not going to be friends.”

“But…”

“We’ve slept together. For months, we… Friends?!”

“That was our arrangement…”

“Our arrangement was a terrible idea. And it was… it was never an arrangement for me.”

“But we discussed things…”

“I shouldn’t have accepted.”

Slowly, you nodded.

It seemed to hurt you, that he showed regrets. But how could he not regret this?

He hated you for a moment, looking sad and scared like you didn’t want to lose him. And he hated you even more because he didn’t regret it. Not really. Despite all the pain he was feeling now, despite all the sleepless nights, and how desperate he was, he still didn’t regret it. He would have given anything to spend one last night with you. He would have gone through all this pain over and over again just to kiss you one more time. He would have done it all over again, just to hold you for one tiny minute…

He was bitter as he spoke. He didn’t care whether it would hurt you or not, he was too hurt himself to care about that. He needed to let it out. For once, he needed to do what was best for him, and not for you.

“Do you know what I wanted to tell you that night?”

You shook your head in silence, waiting for him to continue. You had mimicked his posture, were leaning against your sink with your arms crossed.

“I wanted to stop seeing you like this.”

Your mouth fell open in shock.

“I wanted to tell you that I… that I wanted to stop this stupid arrangement of ours. That I… That I wanted more. That I would have waited until you were ready to date again, no matter how long that would be, to be properly with you.”

His bottom lip trembled, your form was blurred with tears, but he held them back. They shone at the corners of his eyes, making the hazel turn green, but he didn’t cry.

“And you slept with me. We had sex. And then you blurted out that you didn’t give two fucks about me, and that you wanted to date someone else… after we just had sex! Do you realise how fucked up that is?!”

It was your turn to hold back your tears, averting your eyes.

“I’m sorry,” you whispered, but that wasn’t good enough.

“I thought… after everything, I thought you would say yes. I thought you felt… something for me.”

“I… I do care about you, Andy, that’s not the point…”

“Do you? Is that why you thought it was respectful to have sex with me, and wait less than five minutes to reject me?!”

You didn’t say anything. He had raised his voice, although he was trying to keep it down. It made it powerful enough to make him intimidating, but shaky too, showing how vulnerable he was behind the layers of anger.

“Why did you do that? Why the fuck did you do that?!”

“Because… because I knew we had to stop this, and… I just… I know it was selfish, but I wanted to have one last night with you.”

He narrowed his eyes at you. Because it sounded like a good answer, a tempting one. You looked vulnerable, fragile even. As if this was a confession that was revealing too much of you.

But it was just a lie…

“We didn’t have one last night. We only had sex, Y/N.”

You stared at him for a while, but you refused to answer.

“You’ve only stayed once,” he reminded you. “You’ve only stayed once, and after that, it was like… like you didn’t want to remain more than twenty minutes alone with me unless we were having sex.”

“It… it was too hard to stay.”

“Too hard?”

“It was too emotional.”

His eyebrows shot up at that.

“Because having sex with me was not emotional to you? Really?”

“It’s different, and you know it.”

“No, I don’t know.”

“Acting like a couple, with domestic stuff, it’s… it’s different to fucking.”

The way you narrowed your eyes at him, the way you seemed worried now… yeah, Andrew guessed he wasn’t too good at hiding how much your words were hurting.

“Fucking… that’s all there was between us to you? That’s all I was to you?”

“That’s not what I meant...”

“That’s exactly what you meant! Christ! Are you telling me that you were just using me for sex all this time?! Why the fuck would you act like that with me if that was just about fucking, huh?! When we were… Jesus… when you…”

His voice broke, and he blinked tears away, but it wasn’t enough this time, he had to brush them off with the back of his hand.

“This is more complicated than that.”

“What’s complicated?”

“I can’t be with you, Andy. So… it was necessary to keep a certain distance, so we could still save our friendship…”

“Well, we didn’t save shit.”

“God, Andrew, I… I know that I’ve handled telling you about that stupid date badly… terribly even! But us not catching feelings was the plan all along! Don’t blame this on me!”

“So, you were just fucking me, then? All this time? There was nothing more than that?”

“Andy…”

“No! No, you answer me now! What the fuck, Y/N?! Are you really saying that I’ve been hallucinating all this time?! Because I thought… I thought you felt something… When we were lying in bed together, when we were…”

“Andy, you don’t understand.”

“No, you’re right! I don’t understand! We’ve slept together for months, several times a week, while spending our days together… we’ve been friends for years, and… and you didn’t feel anything when we were having sex? Nothing at all? Like… How could you feel nothing at all?”

“We agreed…”

“Fuck this agreement!” Andrew roared, and you visibly shook, his deep voice booming through the room. You had never heard him shout so loudly at anyone before. “Fuck your stupid rules! Fuck all this shit! How could you do this to me? How could you have sex with me and feel nothing! It felt…”

His voice broke, a tear rolled down his cheek, disappeared in his beard, caught a tiny speck of light before fading.

“It felt like it wasn’t just about pleasure. Like you were… like you… like I wasn’t just…”

He heaved a sigh, and all of a sudden he didn’t seem so tall, so intimidating. All of sudden, he was vulnerable and fragile and bent under a weight he couldn’t carry.

“God, Y/N… How could you do this to me?”

A pregnant pause stumbled across the space between your two bodies. It seemed an uncrossable chasm, a gap you couldn’t conquer anymore.

“I’m sorry, Andy… but you can’t put the blame only on me. You agreed to this. Everything was clear, we’ve discussed things…”

“But when we had sex…”

“Andy…”

“When we had sex, did you not feel anything? Something? Just… something… And what about after that? When we were holding onto each other? That morning when we had breakfast together…?”

You were blinking tears away, your arms tight around your own frame, fleeing him. Your body language was obvious, you were refusing to face the truth, or to admit it, at the very least.

“Why are you asking me this, why is it so important?”

“You truly don’t know the answer to that?”

“I don’t.”

“You fucking idiot...”

“Why would you have agreed to do this if that was not what you wanted? If you didn’t want me?”

“Didn’t want you?! Y/N… this is literally the opposite of what I’m saying!”

“I don’t understand!” you raised your voice too this time, following his lead. “We’ve discussed things! We agreed! You said you wanted me!”

“Of course, I wanted you!”

“Then why are you mad?”

“BECAUSE I WANT MORE!”

“WHY DIDN’T YOU SAY THAT?!”

“BECAUSE YOU WOULD HAVE LEFT! BECAUSE YOU DON’T…”

His voice cracked again, he let out a frustrated growl against himself and his bloody feelings that were bubbling all the way to the surface to overcome him and drown him in silence…

“WHAT… NEXT YOU’LL TELL ME YOU LOVE ME…”

“OF COURSE I DO!”

There it was, out in the open. He saw you freezing into place, eyes growing round. And he knew he had fucked up, but what was there left to destroy anyway? He couldn’t be just your friend anymore… he was losing you tonight, no matter what.

“I love you,” Andrew finally let out the words he had kept hidden for so long, they tasted sour in his mouth, and yet a weight was lifted from his chest. “I fucking love you. Of course, I love you. How could you not notice? I was always in love with you. And it was never just sex for me. It was always about making love to you. Did you… have you never made love to me? Not once? Was it just fucking? Really?”

You blinked at him. You seemed stunned in stillness, unable to move or do anything but stare at him with round eyes and parted lips. Andrew thought he knew how to understand your silence. He hated you for it. Despite all his love, while he held your blank gaze with his searching one, he hated you.

“Alright. Very well.”

He turned away, and didn’t look back as he crossed your home to the door.

“Don’t call me again, Y/N. I don’t want to hear about you ever again.” And then he was out in the street, in your driveway, into his car, driving, turning off the engines, closing the door of his car, opening his front door and stepping into his home, taking off his shoes and jacket, walking upstairs and into his bathroom and entering the shower with his clothes on. And when the cold water hit his face he finally allowed himself to let out a shout.

[thelov3lybookworm]

Can I request a cardan x reader fic? Anything you want to write! Just gimmi my baby there isnt much of him on this app.🥺

Weeping heart

Summary: Y/n has seen cardan go through lovers like they're wrappers of chocolates. One in his hand before the previous is even in the dustbin.

Now he has found Jude, and she does not know what to do.

•○●⛦●○•

A/n: anon thank you so much for this request! i love you so much for this. It was such a good writing exercise honestly. This is mainly pining, maybe angst.

Also, this marks the beginning of me writing for characters outside of the acotar universe, so I'm very excited

also I didnt tag anyone because the general taglist i have was for acotar.

(i might be down to write a part 2 👀)

(not proofread)

Enjoy!

•○🌑○•

She bit her lip as she stared up at her best friend, trying to contain the smile that threatened to overtake her features.

"Let me see that smile, beautiful." He grinned lazily at her, his dark eyes twinkling under the rays of sunlight that penetrated the thick canopy of leaves above their head. They were currently seated under a weeping willow, hidden away from the whole world outside. Where only the two of them existed, and nothing else mattered.

The place was special to Y/n and Cardan. This was where the two of them would meet all the time, just the two of them, away from their friends and family. In here, they didn't have to pretend, didn't have to act like everything was okay. They could be themselves, and not care about getting hurt.

He leaned closer to her, searching her eyes, his eyes and features softer than Y/n had ever seen before.

"Shut up." She mumbled, but that action had her lips splitting into that smile she was trying so hard to supress.

His grin widened. "There we go."

His hand came up to cup her cheek, his thumb absently brushing her lower lip, his gaze following it with a hungry look. Then his eyes lifted to hers, a question in them.

She dipped her chin almost imperceptibly.

That was enough for him, and he leaned forward, his lips getting closer and closer to hers.

She let her eyes fall shut.

But the kiss never came.

•○🌑○•

She opened her eyes, wondering why he hadn't yet kissed her, and found herself staring at the ceiling of her room.

She blinked blearily, wondering what the hell happened, and then she realised.

It had been a dream.

She closed her eyes again, heaving a sigh as she willed herself to go back to sleep, back to that dream, hoping he'd kiss her before she woke up again.

Of course, that was very nearly impossible.

Because someone decided in that moment that it would be a good idea to knock on her door.

She was certain she knew who it was.

Still she called out, demanding the identity of the knocker.

The answer was immediate. Cardan.

She groaned lowly, dragging her hands down her face.

He didn't wait for her to let him in. The permission wasn't ever needed between the two. That hadn't changed. Yet.

The next moment, he had barged in through the doors, a grin on his stupid face.

She sat up, trying to look anywhere but his face. Heavy emphasis on trying.

"Y/n, guess what happened."

"I am not in the mood, Cardan."

She winced internally. She was being cruel. He had done nothing wrong. It was not his fault he didn't know of her feelings. She had no right to be rude to him, especially when he was so excited about something.

He wasn't bothered by her lack of enthusiasm. He simply plopped down on her bed as she climbed out of it, getting ready for the day as he launched into a story of how after last night's revel, Jude had told him to wait in their bedchambers while she walked into the closet, her skirts swishing around her legs.

How she had retuned without it.

Y/n tried not to pay attention to the details, but she couldn't help it. She had never been able to ignore what Cardan said, never been able to let anything he said go unheard. He had spent nearly all his years being unheard because no one considered him worthy of their time.

She had long ago decided that she was not going to be one of those people.

She heard everything, and her torturous brain created all the images Cardan's words conjured. Her traitor of a heart clenched, but she ignored it.

"That's great Cardan." She said when he finished speaking, and when she looked at him, he was practically glowing with happiness.

Y/n felt guilty for being jealous of the mortal who had everything Y/n ever wanted, but she couldn't bring herself to care when her heart was breaking into pieces everyday.

"It feels like I've waited for this an eternity. Never thought I would get to have Jude in my arms."

She gave him a smile. "I need to meet up with some generals this morning. I need to leave."

He nodded happily, straightening from where he'd been lying on her bed. She watched him walk out of her room, a knot forming in her throat, her resolve hardening.

She needed... she knew what she needed.

•○🌑○•

Jude had her eyebrow raised, and it concerned Y/n how a mere mortal's judgement could make her nervous.

"Tell me again why you want to go on this mission?"

Y/n reigned in a frustrated sigh. "There is no real reason. I just wish to explore the Elfhame more."

The look Jude gave her told her she saw right through the act. But she didn't push the mater.

"There has been rumours of a rebellion on the other side of Elfhame. If you really want to go on this mission, then you need to know that this is an incredibly long and dangerous mission. You'll not only have to investigate the place, but also squash any hint of rebellion you find."

Y/n gave Jude a smile. "Sounds amazing."

"Sure it does." Jude's eyes narrowed as she continued. "If you need more time away to, as you say, to explore, then after you finish this quest, have a tour around Elfhame and meet up with people who have associated with Madoc before. Make sure they are not plotting something behind our backs."

Y/n dipped her chin in a nod. "When can I leave?"

"Before the week ends."

"So does that mean I can leave right now too?"

If possible, Jude's eyes narrowed further and she stood. At that moment, the door behind Y/n opened, and she stiffened as the smell of his perfume reached her.

"Y/n! I thought you were in the meeting with the generals. What are you doing here?"

Y/n smiled stiffly, turning to look at Cardan.

"I had something important to discuss with Jude." She gestured with her hand.

Cardan nodded, as if that was the most understandable thing in the world.

"What were you talking about?"

"Nothing-"

"She is leaving on a long mission-"

Jude and Y/n spoke up at the same time, and Y/n had to resist the urge to smack her forehead.

Cardan's head swung towards Y/n, and he stared at her with wide eyes, his mouth opening and closing, but no words came out.

Y/n turned to Jude, letting some of the fury at her secret being revealed show in her eyes. And then she smiled tightly. "Could you send that list of people and areas where the rebellion is rumoured to be to my room? I need to begin packing."

Jude's eyebrows were high, but she nodded. Y/n bowed, then turned on her heel and strode away, ignoring Cardan and the way he was trying to gain her attention.

As she left the room, she heard him following and calling for her, but she ignored that too.

Just the way she had always ignored her weeping heart, the one that beat solely for Cardan.

The one that was broken beyond repair now.

•○🌑○•

[erensfeed]

OKAY BUT.

I woke up this morning with like, a flashing need to send you an ask about your LADS Actor AU, which sometimes just consumes my thoughts at random times.

👁️ But the boys recording the MYTHS.

Angst CENTRAL ANGST.

I just remembered the last update where they were doing Caleb's death (haha temporary of course, he's just taking a break) and she's acting out how she passes out and he pops up next to her like, why so sad?

And like... Recording the HEART BREAKING bits of their myths?

Spoilers ahead in case you HAVEN'T seen them all, won't go into detail but...

Dying in Xavier's arms? Forseer Zayne reading her fate and giving up everything for her? Rafayel having to chose between her life and his people's?

Whatever the fuck Sylus has got goin on? With the whole stabbing in the chest?

I was just consumed by the thought of them having to get into that headspace before the scene, having to pretend to see her die or hurt or knowing they won't see her again, when it's fake.

The aftermath of it too, getting out of that, maybe they're all whipped (yes) and just need a good hug and to ground themselves. Method acting you know...

Anyway 👁️ I've ranted enough 👁️

Thank you for reading through this whole ass paragraph, hope your day is wonderful!

content: how i imagine they’d be as actors when filming their myths. * some minor spoilers from me on xavier as well ! * ૮ ˶ᵔ ~ ᵔ˶ ა

you literally have no clue how i literally love you for still thinking ab those silly hcs😭 THANK YOU THANK U THANK UUU !! AND STOP BC THIS IDEA??? ate down.

cause omg they’d literally be love interests who grew head over heels in love with the main co-star in a fr deep(ressive) story. and it’s like gawd. what a life they’d come to lead if they really were actors then LMAOO

but anyway ! they would be told and agree (months prior), that method acting would be the best thing when filming each of their intense myths. and i know for a fact that rafayel would be the one waayyy too into that method acting stuff because it’d all end up feeling really personal.

‘i can totally work with this’ were the exact words that came from him as you watched and listened to him, munching on his box of donuts (this was a habit between you two — going over to the other’s trailer to snack on whatever the other got to eat). not to mention the times he’d re-read his copy of the script analysis for the nth time / before main rehearsals, and how he’d be all “pft, i wonder why [main director’s name] thinks acting all of this would ever even get to me”. and that never aged well at ALL because he ended up being more attached to it than he expected, as his natural reactions were already in tune with his lemurian character anyway.

but anyway during the era of, rafayel would suddenly stay to himself a little more / even got confused on his real feelings for you (?). and of course he’d recognize that and try to keep things professional, but he would also catch himself sometimes looking at or treating you like mc. and it’s like oh ! all this because he somehow tied everything to your irl friendship / dynamic ??? LOL

but anyway much like rafayel, xavier would also see you as the mc. just in a different way of course. cause it doesn’t help that you just so happen to naturally act like the mc, even off camera.

now when acting the real deal of his myth — when you lay lifeless in his arms — he would imagine that you really were the mc, keeping his head down as the feeling of the idea of holding the one he loved but couldn’t save hit him. his eyes would also be vacant during this scene, especially as he held the star tassel, the weight of it feeling heavier as he envisioned you giving it to him before dying.

in this same scene where he had to hold one of your limp hands in his, it actually felt colder. this didn’t show in the final take because xavier acts so authentically, but it did catch him off guard — as no one told him your hands would actually have to be cold for the real scene. and that made the moment feel even more real and intensified this ache in his chest at the thought of losing you. (lolol ofc the directors kept that because gawd everything was so realistic)

he’d tell himself it was just that scene that got to him but he’d eventually grow to randomly start reaching out to hold your hand in his more often, just to feel its warmth.

stop im giggling now bc im abt to go read smth angsty w xavier

moving on though ! zayne and his foreseer myth? especially dawnbreaker?? .. let me not go there bc this would be longer than needed. though i will say that zayne hadn’t planned on being “affected”. but he would quietly start to observe you more, as his way of not directly discussing his emotions. (this was also what prompted him to be quick to protect you on set)

in conclusion. rafayel as an actor, who has the biggest soft spot for you, would pull back just a little while in that headspace. quietly growing to wonder if you’d also forget him & all the moments you shared, once love and deepspace was over. and he would also start joking about his feelings more to mask them during that time. xavier, on the other hand, would develop a habit of finding lame excuses to have your hand in his whenever you were together, since feeling your cold hands that day did actually do something to him. zayne wouldn’t want to admit how it actually affected him but he would eventually be vulnerable about it with only you. lastly and not surprisingly enough, sylus would remain the only sane one regarding his character's darker lore LMAOO. so i’ll just leave that there (until his myth comes out).

but even though their well hidden feelings for you complicated things, they were great actors so it wouldn’t really affect them terribly for long, as they had ways to separate their personal lives from their roles by all the way you’d comfort them after you found out.

a/n: THIS WAS SO FUN & FUNNY TO ADD ONTO. althoughhh i personally don’t feel like this is 100% spot on & tied to the (1st) actor au hcs, as it’s just some ways i think they’d react but that could just be bc i wrote this in one sitting. didn’t also plan on talking that much and ab my glorious 6ft prince rafayel either but anyway thank yeww for this pooks. (also, im giving you a moon emoji for all our next discussions bc i look forward to them🙂‍↕️ )

[stardust-moth]

In order to fully understand why it was so hard for Mike to express how deeply he loves El, and why his speech at the end of season 4 was one of the biggest, most important moments for his entire character, we need to look at not just who Mike is as a person, but also everything that has happened since he met her.

Every single time he opens up his heart to her, something horrible happens to her or she's taken away from him almost immediately afterwards.

1x08; he's an awkward little ball of feelings that are way too big for a boy so young. He makes a nervous attempt at confessing and asking her out on a date; when he can't find words that she'll understand, swoops in for a kiss instead. She lights up immediately and smiles. It's a brief moment of hope and pure happiness. Maybe they can have some semblance of a normal life and be normal kids after this is all over.

Minutes later, all hell breaks loose-- they're almost shot, El pushes herself too far until she can barely move, she's almost taken away by the Bad Men, the Demogorgon appears, and she uses the very last of her strength to sacrifice herself to save him and their friends.

He has to watch helplessly as she disappears.

He spends a year caught between believing she's dead and hoping she's still out there somewhere (but if she is alive then why won't she talk to him anymore...?). Kept silent under threat by the lab, he can't confide in anyone or even acknowledge her existence, not with anyone except those involved... but everyone else is keen on moving on and pretending it never happened. He can find some solidarity in Will, at least, who is in a similar kind of emotional turmoil... but it's not the same and it's not enough.

2x9; he is finally reunited with El, and she runs into his arms like she missed him too. She tells him that all those nights he called out to her, she heard him; she was there reciprocating his feelings the whole time.

In a burst of emotions that he's been forced to suppress for an entire year, he lashes out at the reason they've been kept apart (Hopper), screaming and sobbing. It's a massive catharsis for him, and for once an adult is understanding enough to hold him and not punish him for it.

Minutes later, she is going to go headfirst into a pit of monsters, the place where Mike had just firsthand witnessed dozens of people (if not more) get ripped to shreds only hours earlier, and she is going to attempt to close the Gate-- a feat that he knows may take every ounce of her power, just like last time. He cries. He can't lose her again. She promises he won't, and before she can seal that promise with a kiss, they're pulled apart again.

He has to watch helplessly as she drives away.

3x1; all seems to be okay now. He and El are happily together, and he feels comfortable enough to be playful, romantic, and intimate with her. It's the most emotionally open we've ever seen Mike thus far.

For reasons he can't understand (bc there's no way Hopper explained himself beyond "I'm in charge so do as I say or else"), Hopper is angry about it and threatens to never allow him to see her again: the one thing he fears most.

He panics big time and fucks it up in the process by lying to her. During a frantic attempt to apologize while also abiding by Hopper's rules, he runs into her at the mall. He panics again-- if anyone finds her here, and knows that he was here too, it's all over, and Hopper surely won't hear reason. El dumps him cold on the spot, spurred on by Max and her rebellious attitude (and without any context of course). He isn't given much opportunity to respond. He knows he's in the wrong for lying to her, so what could he even say...?

He has to watch helplessly as she drives away.

It's a hard blow, and he retreats back into himself, unable to get any joy out of playing D&D (which he clearly hasn't lost interest in), back to the deadpan sarcasm and accidentally snapping a little too harshly at anyone whom he feels would take El's place.

3x6; no one seems to understand the danger El is putting herself in. Everyone is berating him for worrying about her safety. He's seen firsthand what these monsters do to people, he's seen firsthand how El pushes her abilities too far. No one is listening.

The words "I love her and I can't lose her again" burst out in his desperation, perhaps before he's even had a chance to realize how deep those feelings run, despite whatever protective walls he's tried to build around his heart to keep it from getting broken again.

Soon after, all hell breaks loose. El is nearly killed several times over, her leg is ripped open, she pushes herself so hard that she breaks herself and loses her powers completely. Her father is taken from her. She's shattered by all of this, and there's absolutely nothing he could do or say to make it better.

She tells him that when he admitted he loves her, she heard him, and indeed she loves him, too... But now she's leaving.

He has to watch helplessly as she drives away.

4x1; they've been apart for a few months, and write letters back and forth to each other. El's letters paint a picture of an ideal new life: she and the Byers family are doing well; she's starting school and it's going well; she's made new friends, she likes her new home, everything is going well. She seems to be thriving. She sounds happy, maybe even happier than she had been living in Hawkins. Maybe Max was right, maybe she's better off being her own person without him, and maybe the respectful thing to do is step back... It's a small insecurity that creeps up subconsciously. In his replies he holds back, afraid of clinging too hard.

Though there's little logic in it, he's afraid that if he tells her he loves her again, another disaster might strike and this lovely happy life she's finally found might get taken from her. After all, that's what always seems to happen when he does.

4x2; after months of waiting, they can finally see each other again. He wears her favorite colors, picks a handful of flowers for her, and falls happily back into step with how they used to be. Soon that same day, however, reality becomes clear and the facade crumbles. People he was told were her friends show up to torment and publicly humiliate her. She had been lying. She isn't happy here, she hasn't healed, she is right at the edge of a breaking point that he doesn't see coming at all. He can't believe she would lie to him, she's not the kind of person to lie... especially not about something like bullying, something that she was always so understanding about with him.

On that logicless subconscious level, he wonders if it's all his fault-- he should have known somehow, he should have been there for her. She protected him from his bullies, he should have protected her from hers. He tries to come to her rescue. She runs away from him.

He's helpless to save her, again.

4x3; after a night to process everything that happened-- and deciding that the betrayal he feels from her lying to him is nothing compared to the turmoil she must be going through right now-- Mike approaches her in the gentlest way possible, wanting to listen and trying to understand. El, however, isn't receptive at all to his attempts at reassurance. She is at an all-time low, she's given up. She believes she is unlovable, irredeemable, a monster, just a thing that doesn't even have those superhuman abilities to compensate anymore. Mike can't believe what he's hearing-- doesn't she know that she's always been so much more than her powers? She's always been so much more than what she lacks in quote-unquote "normalcy"... None of those things matter, they have absolutely no bearing on whether she's worthy of being loved, because he loves her, completely regardless of any of these things. He always has...

El starts flinging his restrained words back at him, the products of his insecurity and trauma-induced fear. That fear takes hold yet again, and he stumbles, afraid of saying too much or not enough, because surely both could result in pushing her away-- she's retreating, hearing none of it; nothing he tries to say consoles her.

Moments later, local police come knocking. She's taken away in cuffs, and she's so broken inside that she won't even look at him when he chases the police car down the street and promises he'll get her out somehow...

Once again, he has to watch helplessly as she drives away.

4x8/4x9; after days of driving through the heat and dryness of southwest desert, having narrowly escaped being shot at with military-grade assault rifles, witnessing the death of and burying a man whose last words were that El is in danger... After watching dozens of people get mowed down by a sniper in a helicopter, and watching that same helicopter be smashed into the ground in a ball of flames...

There she is. Just as powerful and beautiful and alive as she's ever been. When he runs to her and embraces her, she looks at him like she can't believe he's real. She's beaming a smile right from her soul and it's like all the insecurity and self-doubt that have plagued them both just vanish from existence now that they're in each other's arms again.

Like always, however, the universe comes crashing down soon after. Max is marked for a gruesome death and all of Hawkins is in danger. They're miles away and helpless, and the only possible way for El to save everyone is if she goes in alone. She's stronger than ever, but so is her foe. Once again, she descends to face all the demons of hell on her own, and Mike can't do anything.

She's losing. She's choking. She's dying. He's helpless.

He must be cursed. He must be. Being with her, loving her, allowing himself to admit he loves her, it always brings only pain and suffering and loss. His heart is so full that it's aching, it's bursting out of his chest, and he can't contain it any longer.

She's going to die and it's going to be all his fault, because he fell in love, and it's cursed her.

Just before it all crumbles into utter despair, the earnest support from his oldest and dearest friend-- one who's always shared and understood his feelings of helplessness-- sparks a light of hope in him: "You're the Heart." You're not helpless. You can save her.

The words that come spilling out of Mike's mouth are truer than any he's ever dared to speak before, and it's the most terrified he's ever been, but he has enough courage for this moment. Despite all of the fears that have been building, stifling, choking him to death for years-- fears that the light of his life will inevitably disappear again, and there's nothing he can do to stop it-- despite it all, he pours out his heart to her.

He loves her. He's always loved her. He loves everything she ever was, is, and could be. He can't imagine a world without her in it. She saved him, in every way a person can be saved. And he needs her to live. He believes in her.

And it works. It's music to her ears.

[obsessedelusional]

What the f*** are you looking at?

parings ✦ Eddie Munson x You/Reader

summary ✦ As a fellow social reject you sat at the same lunch table as the Hell Fire club. You didn’t mind, forming a crush on their leader Munson. What happens when one day he catches you starting?

authors note ✦ Okay this is tmi but my freshman year of high school I had a fat ass crush on this boy he was the class clown always doing the most one day I turn around as he’s being loud and he says “What’re you looking at?” And then continues to tell his friends I’m always staring at him. Literally so traumatizing LMAO turned it a cute lil fluff piece about Eddie. Obviously my life didn’t end out like this lol

FEEDBACK AND REBLOGS APPRECIATED!!!

The first three years of high school were all the same. You spent everyday alone, your face tucked away in a book. Sometimes you’d wonder what it would be like to be a little reckless. Maybe even do something kind of stupid. Pretend for once that you didn’t give a fuck. Truth was you gave too many fucks. Constant state of worry and anxiety. It was much easier to be invisible. Doing everything in your power to be as unseen as possible.

Which is exactly why you admired Eddie Munson. He gave off the most I don’t give a fuck energy you had ever seen. You were insanely jealous that he is so effortlessly him self. Something you struggled with as long as you can remember.

Eddie was so attractive in your eyes. Most of the books you read were romance, the main man a stereotypical bad boy. You always imagined Eddie when reading the many stories. Forming a giant crush on him years ago.

One perk of being a social reject was having no choice but to sit at the same table as him. Getting a front row seat to his shenanigans. The Hell Fire Club took up half of the table while the rest of the school losers sat at the other end. Sometimes you would wonder why you few didn’t just befriend each other. No one ever brave enough to be the first person to introduce themselves.

Today was no different, you were sat the lunch table reading as a way to pass the time and hopefully stop anyone from talking to you. The large thud at the other end of the table has you looking up from the pages in front of you. You look to see Eddie putting on his usual theatrics.

“Fuck this school.” His voice spreading across the lunch room. Most people so used it they don’t bother looking his way. You on the other hand look for any excuse to stare at Eddie. Jason makes a snarky comment which only fuels Eddie’s fire.

“And fuck you too!” He flips Jason off before finally taking a seat. You can’t help but feel for him something must be truly bothering him. That quickly changes when his head snaps upwards his eyes move directly at you.

“What the fuck are you looking at?” He spits talking to you. Your eyes go wide, entirely in shock. Never once had you actually interacted with Eddie. Always wanting to, would even imagine how it would go down. Not like this.

“Dude what the fuck?” Jeff says to Eddie.

“What? She’s always fucking staring.” Eddie says, venom in his voice. Tears begin to brim your eyelids so you stand up, wasting no time to leave. You can hear the rest of the group telling him that was dick move.

You make your way to the nearly empty library. Where’d you spend the rest of lunch. After today you’d probably spend every lunch till you graduated in the library. Promising yourself you’ll never look at Eddie again.

—

It’s been over a week since the incident. You hadn’t seen Eddie since. Which was easy enough considering most of your classes were AP and he wasn’t in any of those. You ended up enjoying spending lunch in the library. It was quiet enough that there were little to no interruptions as you read.

The school day comes to an end. Your walking to your car, eyes on the floor. In an attempt to avoid all your classmates. That’s until you come to a screeching halt, someone’s blocking the door to your car. While you can only see their tattered white sneakers you recognize them immediately. It’s Eddie.

“I wanted to apologize.” His voice softer than his usual tone. You ignore him reaching for the door handle, he moves in the way blocking your hand.

“I’m so sorry.” He says while you continue to refuse to look at him.

“I was having a shitty day. Mrs. Davis was telling me off for falling behind in class. As I was leaving her classroom the principal calls me to the office, blaming me for the graffiti that appeared in the gym. Which wasn’t me by the way, if I was capable of that everyone would know it was me. Didn’t matter I got in trouble for it, two weeks of after school detention.” He keeps on rambling on and on about that events that happened before he snapped at you.

“Then Jason was being an asshole. I was so irritated and when I saw you looking at me I took it out on you. I became the asshole. I feel terrible.” He says, you can’t help but feel like he’s being genuine.

“It’s whatever. Can I get in my car now?” You say, your voice timid as usual.

“Please let me make it up to you.” He pleads. It takes all your will power to not look up at those big beautiful brown eyes.

“Don’t worry about it.” You say reaching around him but he blocks you yet again.

“Please I miss catching the pretty book worm staring at me.” As the words come out of his mouth you can’t help but internally freak the fuck out. Is what he’s saying true? You can’t bring yourself to respond, too entirely overwhelmed by the situation.

“Look at me please.” His hand reaches for your chin in attempt to raise your face. You push it away, Eddie retracts his hand surprised by your reaction.

“Why won’t you look at me?” You’re focused on his hands, his fingers playing with the tear in his jeans.

“Cause I’m always fucking staring.” You are surprised by the words that come out.

“I’m serious when I say I miss it. Let me make it up to you. I want to take you out on a date.” You can sense the smile on his face, still refusing to make eye contact with him. Wishing nothing more than to escape this situation.

“This feels like a trap.” You respond.

“What?”

“If I say yes it’s gonna be a prank or something. The second I say yes you’re gonna start laughing as if the idea of anyone going out with me is ridiculous.”

“Do you really think that of me?” He asks, his tone sounds upset now.

“A week ago, no. Today? Maybe.”

“I don’t think the idea of anyone going out with you is ridiculous. I noticed years ago your constant gaze. I never minded. If anything I started going out of my way to get your eyes on me. Always making a fool of myself so I can see your smile when you finally get your head out of whatever book your reading.”

“Then why did you say what you said?” You ask.

“Because this time the reason you were looking my way was because I was throwing a tantrum. Like a giant toddler. I was embarrassed. You looked concerned while ever looked disgusted by the freak lashing out.” He sighs, you so desperately wishing you could muster up the courage to look up at Eddie.

“So I lashed out on you. I regretted it immediately. I swear.” Eddie explains.

“I forgive you.”

“You do?” His voice perks up.

“Does that mean you’ll let me make it up to you?”

“Maybe.” You smile, still focusing on his hands.

“Look at me, please.” He’s basically begging at this point. When you hesitate, he reaches for your chin. Only this time you don’t stop him. You’re face to face with Eddie now. So close to him, closer than you ever been.

“Do you believe me yet that this isn’t some elaborate joke on you?” Your lost deep in his eyes, unable to to process what’s happening. When you don’t respond he closes his eyes, moving closer to you. He’s about to kiss you, your first kiss. Unsure of what to do you close your eyes too. He plants a sweet short kiss on your lips before pulling away. Your eyes still closed when he pulls away.

“Believe me now?” You nod yes unable to form any words, eyes closed. He slips a piece of paper in your back pocket, the pocket that rests on your butt.

“It’s my number. Call me tonight?” Eddie asks.

“Okay.” You smile opening your eyes, Eddie’s lets out a small laugh before leaving you alone to process what just happened.

“What the fuck?” You whisper to yourself. You reach in your pocket half expecting it to be blank or for it say that you’ve been pranked. Like this really was some elaborate joke on you.

It doesn’t say that. It is his number and his name with a little heart. It reads ‘sorry I was an asshole i promise to make it up to you’.

You smile thinking maybe it’s your turn to do something a lil reckless.

[skzhocomments]

876 - "I'm sorry, I just can't keep pretending everything is okay." - Bang Chan (Stray Kids)

General Masterlist

Request me a story

---

Writing Prompt 876 - "I'm sorry, I just can't keep pretending everything is okay."

- Bang Chan

Wattpad | AO3

~

Writing Prompt 876: "I'm sorry, I just can't keep pretending everything is okay." - Bang Chan

~

“Hey, baby. Are you still coming over tonight?” You ask, your voice conveying a hope that your boyfriend, Chris, is surely going to stomp on, just as he usually does.

It’s tough, really, to be in love with someone who claims they love you but rarely shows it. It shouldn’t even be this difficult. All he’d have to do is show up and spend time with you, but apparently, he always has time for everything else.

Never for you.

“Oh, sorry, babe. Were we supposed to meet tonight? I was just in the studio working on a track…” He says with slight hesitation.

You let out a soft sigh. It’s not the first time it happened, and your heart clenches with the realisation that it won’t be the last, either.

He’s always doing this. Every plan you two make comes secondary to whatever else appears in his schedule.

“Oh.” Is all you say, disappointment surely audible through the simple response.

“I’m really sorry. Do you think we could reschedule? This is really important. We are supposed to finish this song by the end of this week, and-”

“It’s fine.” You cut him off. “No worries. Good luck.”

You don’t wait for him to reply before you end the call. The dress you’ve prepared for tonight is laid on the bed, the tag still on, and you frown looking at it.

You don’t know why you keep buying more clothes whenever you two make a plan to meet up. Monthly, if that. Your closet is full of dresses and blouses you have yet to wear, all of them still have a tag; they’re practically new – a reminder of all the plans he’s cancelled, of all the times he’s bailed on you because something more important came up.

With another sigh falling from your lips, you pick the dress up and look at it. It’s a beautiful red dress that will have to wait. You put it back on the hanger and place it carefully in your closet, next to all the other dresses you haven’t worn.

Maybe you should start selling them. Surely someone else would want them – someone who will actually get to use them.

A tear makes its way down your right cheek, and you hastily wipe it away with your hand. You don’t want to cry again, but hell, it’s so hard not to cry.

It’s like Chris doesn’t even care about you. How could he say he loves you, when he can’t even show up for one single dinner? You haven’t seen each other in weeks, and you always understood his need to work, but it’s getting to be too much, even for you.

The loneliness is eating away at you, and you find yourself mindlessly scrolling on Instagram and watching your friends’ stories. For the first time in your life, you feel jealousy bubbling up in your chest as you tap on your screen and see everyone being on dates, spending time with their significant others and trying out restaurants.

You’ve never done that with Chris.

It’s too risky to go out. He always says, so you never actually went out. You only had dinners at your place, saw films on your sofa and cuddled on the bed, and that’s it.

Maybe you’re just not important enough to him, to make you a priority. It’s a sad realisation to have, that you can be so in love with someone who is simply not fitting in your life at all.

Am I even happy? You ask yourself, but the tears spilling from your eyes as you grab an ice cream from the freezer and sit yourself on the sofa to watch a show to distract you tells you everything you need to know.

You are not happy, not in the slightest.

You are not happy with Chris, and it hurts to admit it to yourself, but you haven’t been happy in a long while, and you’ve just been lying to yourself.

For how long can you keep it up? You don’t even know anymore.

It was much easier to be single. Even if you were on your own, at least there weren’t any expectations that would only end up disappointing you in the end.

Not even the ice cream tastes sweet enough, but you console yourself by thinking that you, at least, haven’t done your make-up tonight, so there’s nothing to clean up. You can keep ugly sobbing for as long as you want, tasting the saltiness of your tears instead of the sweetness of the frozen dessert.

~

“Hey, babe! Are you free?” Chris asks immediately after you pick up the phone.

“Mhm.” You say, munching on another sweet mess. You should probably stop eating so much crap, but it makes you feel a tad better.

“Great! I’m on my way!”

“Oh? You’re coming here tonight?”

“Yeah, I’m just a couple of blocks over. It’s Friday, date-night. Remember?” He asks, and you almost let out a bitter chuckle.

He hasn’t kept up with your Friday date-nights in weeks, so yeah, you most definitely forgot about it.

“Alright. You know the pass code.”

“See you soon, I love you!” He says, but you don’t have it in you to say anything back.

You still love him, but you’ve talked less and less, and you simply can’t do it anymore. You can’t.

Normally, you would’ve been over the moon to know he’s coming over. You would’ve dressed up, put on make-up, done your hair… but now? You don’t have the energy.

Your door rings and you go open it in your pyjamas, and seeing Chris, you are once again on the verge of crying.

He shows you the largest smile ever and hands you a bouquet of flowers, your favourites, so you return the smile and grab them, going to the kitchen and taking the withered ones from the vase – the last bouquet he bought for you the last time you’ve seen each other. Was it two months ago?

“It’s so good to see you, baby. You're so beautiful.” He smiles, hugging you from behind as you put water in the vase.

He presses a small kiss on the back of your neck, and you can’t help but frown. Goosebumps form all over your skin and your heart starts beating faster, but deep down, you know that even if he is here now, he hasn’t been here for you in quite a while, and you simply can’t act like he has.

“Chris… we need to talk.” You say, turning off the faucet and putting the flowers in the vase, placing it in front of the window.

“Yeah?” Chris asks, and as you look at him, you notice a slight frown overtaking his features. “About what?”

“Let’s sit down first.” You show him to a chair and follow suit.

“Babe, you’re scaring me.” He jokes with a small chuckle, but seeing how serious you look, his lips immediately turn into a thin line. “What’s wrong?”

“This… us.” You say, gesturing between you two and averting your gaze for a moment. You really need to compose yourself and not start crying for the millionth time this week.

“Us? What do you mean?”

“I’m sorry, Chirs. I just… I just can’t keep pretending everything is okay when it’s not.”

“Baby…” He tries touching your hand on the table, but you are quick to retract it and place it in your lap.

“I think I’d be better if we broke up.” You reply, looking straight in his eyes.

“B-break up? Wh… What do you mean?” Chris immediately stands up and kneels next to your chair, grabbing your hands. His look is pleading, and his eyes get glossy, matching yours.

“You… you are never here, Chris, and I’m tired of… of waiting for you to treat me right and finally realise that I matter just as much as everything else going on in your life. I understand your career is important and a priority, but… I should also be important to you.” You say, trying to control your voice.

It’s almost impossible to look at him, and your heart clenches so much. Everything hurts. You just wished it never came to this point, but you don’t see any other solution to the problem. It’d simply be better for you to no longer have any expectations, to no longer get disappointed every time he prioritizes something else over spending time with you.

“No… No, no, no.” He shakes his head. “Baby, you are so important to me. You surely know that?”

“I don’t think I do, Chris.” You show him a bitter smile. “I don’t even remember when we’ve last seen each other.”

“What do you mean? I came over last-” week, he wanted to say, but he suddenly remembers about cancelling. “Not last week, uhm, was it two weeks ago? Or… three? We surely met up this month…” He mumbles to himself, but as he is trying to recall when you’ve last met, you can notice the way his expression changes.

“See? You can’t even remember it either. We haven’t seen each other in months, Chris. This is not what a relationship is supposed to be like.”

“But…” Chris starts; however, he doesn’t even know what to say. You’re right, and he can’t make up any excuses, realising how much he’s hurt you. “Please let me try to make it better, hm? I’ll… I’ll make up a schedule, and try to come by more often, and-”

“No.” You cut him off, and it took you everything in your heart to say this. It’s time you put yourself first, put a stop to this nonsense. “It’s a little too late for that, Chris.”

“What?” He frowns even more. “Please tell me that’s not true… Do you… do you still love me?”

“I do.” You nod with a sad smile. “I still love you. But I can’t keep going like this. I’m sorry.”

“No!” He stands up, taking you by surprise, and grabs your face with his hands. “I can’t… I can’t accept that. I also love you so, so much, and…”

“And what?” You chuckle bitterly. “And what, Chris? We’ve been together for over a year, yet I can’t even recall us meeting more than 10 times. We never go out anywhere, you don’t even show up to our Friday date-nights anymore. You haven’t shown up in months.”

“You’re right! You’re right…” He says like a broken record as his voice cracks and tears start running down his cheeks.

“I can’t be with you anymore if you’re not going to love me right. I hope you can understand that.”

“But I can! I can love you right. Just… just give me another chance. Please.” He says, but you just shake your head and remove his hands from your face. You can’t look at him anymore.

“I’m sorry…”

“No, I’m the one who’s sorry. I will do better, I promise. I will do my best and treat you better, hm?”

“I don’t know, Chris… I… I don’t trust you anymore.” You frown as you stand up as well, and Chris takes you into an embrace, and you wish you wouldn’t have felt so safe in his arms.

You truly love him, and it’s breaking your heart to cut this tie between you two, but you truly can’t be with him any longer and rely on empty promises.

“Just… one more chance. Please? One chance and I will prove to you that I can do better.”

“… I’m not sure...” You say after a little while, tearing yourself away from him.

“Please.” He tries again, and you despise the feeling of hope settling in your chest. You don’t want to trust him again only for him to break that trust and make you feel like this.

“I will think about it… okay? But if nothing changes and you don’t start putting more effort, I’m done.” You reply, and his face immediately lights up.

“Yes! Okay. I won’t mess it up this time, I promise!”

“You better not…” You chuckle as he presses a short kiss on your lips.

“I missed you.” He whispers against your mouth.

“Mhm, I missed you too.”

“And I’m sorry. I promise I’ll do better.”

“A lot of promises in a short amount of time, don’t you think?” You chuckle again.

“I’ll take it one day at a time and love you right, yeah?”

“Yeah.” You reply, and you seriously wish that he won’t let you down again.

He is still the man you love, so you are willing to give him another chance as long as he’s proven he’d change his ways.

You just hope you won’t end up regretting this decision.

~The End~

~

Hope you enjoyed this short story!

If you want to request a Oneshot, send me a number between 1-2675 and who it should be about, and I'll do my best!

Love,

Storm

[ncsdlr]

Villainess

A/N: no smut for once😃

Natasha Romanoff x Reader

angst

-------------

"There are bombs out there, Y/L/N! Have you no care for your home? The civilians living in it?!" Natasha yelled.

You put your hands up in surrender as much as you could in your restraints, making a dismissive face at Natasha's enraged one. "Hey, don't yell at me. You know what that does to me."

Natasha groaned, "What the fuck do I care about that now, huh? Tell me where the fucking bombs are!"

Your head tilted to the side, pretending to think exaggeratedly, "Hmm...no, thank you."

Natasha sighed frustratedly, banging her head on the table between the two of you. There was just no way to get through to you. Natasha viewed you as stubborn and heartless. Meanwhile, you viewed her as kind and selfless.

That didn't matter, though. It never mattered when you were just beginning this enemies-with-benefits thing, it didn't matter when it started to progress, and now it doesn't matter as things are almost coming to an eternal end for you.

As time ticked away, you worried for Natasha's safety. It wasn't good for her to just sit here with you. So, you rolled your eyes and spoke up, "Y'know, you should just go. Leave me here to rot in this putrid cell."

Natasha's head perked up, her eyes looking deep into yours filled with blatant anger, speaking to you with an ever-growing tone, "And why would I do that? Why should I give you what you want when you don't even give me what I need?!"

"It's for your own good!" You yelled back.

Natasha sighed once again, closing her eyes and regulating her breathing as much as she could. "Okay, so, what do you want?"

"If I said 'you', would you believe me?" Natasha didn't know the depth and the actuality of your question; hence, she rolled her eyes.

"Is that what you want? You fucked me once or twice and now you can't get enough?"

Youo merely shrugged, if only to get under her skin more. Natasha didn't understand, and she didn't have to. So, you just went along with the motion.

"Maybe, maybe not. It's not like I would actually tell you, dummy."

Natasha groaned, having had enough of your bullshit. She just wanted to get this over with and find where the stupid bombs were. Natasha walked around the table and straddled your lap, freeing your hands from their binds so that they could find their rightful home on her waist.

"What are you doing now?" you questioned.

"Giving you what you want, so you can give me what I want," Natasha answered.

You quirked an eyebrow at Natasha, eyeing her suspiciously. "Is this a test?"

"Do you not want this? Want me?"

"Of course, I do."

"So shut the fuck up and have me then."

But she misunderstood you. You did want her, but not in the way she thought. You wanted her wholly. You wanted her mind, you wanted to know her, you wanted to be with her. You wanted everything with Natasha.

But time was running out for you anyway. Might as well have her in the way she thought.

****

Everything was in ruin. The place was a mess. The glass cell that held you was shattered. Natasha was knocked out all the way on the other side of the room. At least you'd had the decency to hurriedly dress Natasha up before exploding a few feet away from her.

When Natasha awoke, the last thing she'd remembered was your forlorn face hovering above hers. You were doing something to her, yet she couldn't remember what it was.

Natasha took a look around the room and saw the mess that was made of it. Dust everywhere, debris littering the floor. She almost couldn't see through the thick smoke filling the room.

What the hell happened?

Natasha looked around in the smoke-filled room, leaning back on one arm as she squinted through the smoke. She slowly pushed herself up, trying her best not to fall over herself. That wouldn’t exactly be ideal given the situation at hand.

Whatever the situation was.

The last thing she remembers happening was you yelling something into her ear before all this came to fruition. And then something loud rang through the room, the explosion happened.

The explos- Y/N!

Oh, God, where could you be. Natasha hastily pushed herself off the ground, now not even bothering to stabilize herself on the wall anymore. She was worried. For the first time ever, she was worried about you. Were you okay? Were you somewhere away from the explosion when it happened? Gods, her heart was beating way too loudly for her to think clearly.

Natasha moved through the smoke with great pace, pushing chunks of debris out of her way just so she could get to you. And then there it was, her favorite shade of brown for hair, only now it was tainted with a thick red substance.

No.

Natasha couldn’t believe it. Your body, although fully clothed, had been mutilated. A large chunk of your left side was obliterated into nothing but mush, blood drenched your whole body, your left arm was merely hanging on by its joints. Your guts were spilled around you as you lied there unmoving.

You…were gone.

Natasha’s knees hit the floor at the same speed her tears cascaded down her face. Her trembling hands came to grip your bloodied face gently, careful not to tear you apart even more than you already were. Sobs racked through Natsha’s body as her chest pressed against what was left of yours, her throat constricting to keep her pained screams at bay. But in the end, she couldn’t keep her pain silenced.

Natasha screamed for all that her heart was worth, your stolen moments with each other banging on the barriers of her mind because even if she didn’t admit it, you were the one she was living for. The first time she got tasked to take you out was merely the beginning of her blossoming attraction to you. Only too late did she realize that she got up every single day, since then, just to see you.

She memorized your routine and kept meeting you halfway until you started giving her charming smiles and pushing yourself into her heart with your quick, witty replies. Natasha found herself unable to stay away from you the way she should be. And she also couldn’t bring herself to actually turn you in, knowing damn well what S.H.I.E.L.D. would have done to you.

Now she regrets not turning you in sooner. If she had, maybe they could’ve helped you the way they helped her. All this probably could have been avoided if she had turned you in, got you talking about those stupid bombs. She regretted being selfish, keeping you all to herself all this time. Natasha let herself live in a daydream.

As she put the pieces together, and how jittery you’d be whenever the two of you would get together, she figures it all out. All this time, you spent your last your last few days with her. This whole time you were the bomb, and that frustrated Natsha to no end. Why hadn’t you told her?

Now, she couldn’t have you at all. Now, neither of you had time with each other. Now, Natasha had no one to stay no matter how mean she got. Now, she had no one to tease her endlessly. Now, she had no one.

Natasha did have her team, but they weren’t the ones to stay even when she was mean. You matched her energy, and bit back at her heatlessly when she snapped at you. The team wouldn’t kiss the top of her head to help her wake up in the morning. You were gentle with her. You knew how to treat her and performed perfectly.

****

“Safe to say I got what I wanted.” You grinned, your hands busying themselves with both of yous discarded clothes.

“Yuh-huh, tell me where the bombs are.” There was a hint of breathlessness to Natsha’s voice, and that filled you with great pride, but at the mentioned of the bombs, your face dulled. Now, with a blank expression, you sat Natasha up against the wall you found yourselves against and helped dress her up.

But Natasha wouldn’t let up, “Y/N, where are the bombs.” She spoke firmly.

You gave a bleak reply, “You’ll find out soon enough.”

“What the hell is that supposed to mean? Y/N, we had a deal; me for those fucking bombs. Now tell me where they are?” She weakly swatted your shoulder, holding onto you as you finished dressing her.

Then came the ringing in her ears at which Natasha groaned. You were saying something, but it was all muffled from what Natasha could hear.

“Nat, all this time we’ve spent together, you made me see hope which I never thought I would have since HYDRA took me in. You made me feel good, you made me happy. And for that, I thank you. Thank you, Nat. I have to go now, hon’. I’m sorry.”

You pecked Natasha’s forehead as you pulled away from her, your hands dragging off of her pretty face one last time just to take her in again. You flipped the table onto it’s side and sat behind it, waiting for your inevitable end.

The time ticked, you swear you could hear it, and then came the darkness, the pain, and finally, the nothingness.

[sayuri-of-the-valley]

On how Crowley and Aziraphale's dynamic shifted in s2:

Okay so I was inspired by this lovely post by @rebeccasteventaylor which I couldn't find the link to in order to reblog directly, but if anyone has a link to it pls I'd love to put it here:

Anyway, while I absolutely 100% agree with @rebeccasteventaylor 's meta, I have to point out that s2 shifted it a little. Especially for Aziraphale.

We don't see him looking away trying to hide his heart eyes anymore as he used to do in s1 (we all remember the "smitten" scene, only to cite ONE). Compare the little breath of lust from the Bastille (when he looks away twice) to the "don't hesitate to ask me if you have any questions about love" one.

In s2, he touches Crowley like crazy. He touches his chest, his hand, his back, asks him to dance, gives him a whole ass cotillion ball.

He was deliberately and explicitly pursuing Crowley this season. If s1 was all Crowley pursuing Aziraphale, s2 was all Aziraphale pursuing Crowley.

And Crowley seemed to either not notice or not acknowledge that Aziraphale was doing that (the way he said Aziraphale only has 3 reasons to call him still drives me crazy. Crowley ffs those were ALL the reasons there is to call someone. He's ALWAYS thinking of calling YOU).

I think Crowley was afraid. Probably for the same reason he never told Aziraphale he was homeless. Which is sad and kinda doesn't make sense at first bc this is all Crowley has ever wanted, right?

Until we remember the last time Crowley let himself love and be loved freely, he was cast away (yes, the Fall). He lost everything bc he wasn't worthy according to some crazy criteria. Apparently he doesn't even know what he DID exactly.

I wonder if Crowley thinks he's not worthy of Aziraphale. I wonder if that's why he refused to see their love for centuries until Nina threw it at his face (Nina LITERALLY doing the Lord's work). I wonder if he's afraid of loving and letting himself be loved and then losing it again. Afraid of daring to ASK and losing everything. Again.

And Crowley wasn't *happy* this season, even with their freedom. I wonder if Aziraphale was mistakenly arriving at the conclusion that he was not enough to make Crowley happy. That him alone would never make Crowley smile the way he did when creating nebulae.

These 4 years were breathing space between the two "wars", according to Crowley himself in s1. And I think Crowley doesn't deal well with their relationship in a calm environment. He only knows how to make grand gestures, and heroic rescues, and go fast and act on impulse because then he doesn't have to THINK. Once he needs to sit down and make a commitment (telling Aziraphale he's homeless for ex), he just STOPS, he can't.

Aziraphale was the opposite. The calmness without any danger was giving him all the space he needed to act on his feelings, while the sense of danger always made him enter denial mode (which ironically seemed to be Crowley's mode in s2).

Of course they still need to put a name on what they are and stop pretending, Nina was absolutely right (and Crowley did catch up on that faster in those last 15min), maybe Aziraphale was still lacking this bit even if he was pursuing Crowley, but we can't deny that until those last 15min the "us" was coming from Aziraphale.

It's sad to realise that unconsciously, without even noticing, Crowley was rejecting Aziraphale almost the whole season.

UNTIL suddenly there's a huge problem, a desperate situation and he wants to abandon everything, take Aziraphale and run away again! (his original plan wasn't even to run away, it was to go to the Ritz). And who can blame him after what happened when he Fell? The Fall was totally unexpected, nobody even knew that could HAPPEN.

Crowley doesn't think himself worthy of Aziraphale (he's UNFORGIVABLE!), and Aziraphale doesn't think he's enough to make Crowley TRULY unashamedly happy and carefree.

And they're BOTH immensely WRONG ofc, we can all see it. They're each other's WORLD.

But they just assume stuff and never ASK, never TALK (bc well, it was literally dangerous before, I get it, their communication issues don't come from nowhere). That's why they have different perspectives on how to fix their situation in the end.

And btw I have to add we can't ignore Crowley was opening himself more too, always taking off his glasses when he was at the Bookshop for example. Ironically he was just a bit slower than Aziraphale for once. All that ofc until those last 15min, when they both change back to their old behaviours (makes me want to bang my forehead onto a wall).

I do believe they'd get there if the Metatron hadn't intervened (interesting that he chose this *exact* moment), especially after that little push from Maggie and Nina (for Crowley) and ofc brielzebub (for Aziraphale) that was gonna make them BOTH confess their feelings.

Anyway, bottom line, fuck the Metatron.

This is also a thread on Twitter :D