#not me because i think people just hear how tired i sound and don't try it
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iguessitsjustme · 9 months ago
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work rant feel free to ignore i just need to get this out of my brain before i esplode:
My job not having any social media presence actually drives me insane...I'm going to try to rant without giving away where I work but my god. I work for an extremely well known (at least in the USA) organization and there's a lot of misinformation flying around out there and we do have a website, but just a website. That no one goes to or looks at unless they call and we direct them to exactly what they're looking for because they ask if we have it written down anywhere.
And I think it's incredibly...obtuse...to not have any presence at all. I'm not saying we need to have an extremely loud and huge presence. But even just like an official reddit or an official tiktok (we do have a twitter kind of but it is never used and I honest to god don't think anyone has access to it anymore) and even if those pages just have the most basic information on it, I think that would help. Just like "here's a link to our website. Here's our phone number. Here's which department handles what if you want to be asked for that specific department." I spend so much of my day on the phone with people that have questions that are so easily answered by just going on our website but no one does. Also don't even get me started on what they did to the website it looks like it got hacked now but it didn't.
This is a strange work rant for a Sunday night but I find myself annoyed. My coworkers and I send each other reddit posts of people misunderstanding things. I mean, they are willfully misunderstanding things they were previously informed of. In writing. But if we really want to make it better and more accessible for people, I think having the information presented in multiple ways would be best. Especially when we're dealing with children. These kids are on reddit and on tiktok and on twitter and they have questions and they are more likely going to go searching in those places to find information. And there are people that claim themselves as experts on all of those platforms but none of them work for or have previously worked for my organization. So they don't know. So these kids are getting incorrect information and then I get angry parents and children on the phone because they listened to the wrong person or organization and I'm standing by our policy and our rules and they don't like that.
Also sometimes they aren't angry on the phone because they were misinformed about something saying that they can't do this this or that and it turns out they can. And if they hadn't called they would have entirely missed the opportunity because they're going to the wrong sources because we, as an organization, refuse to be the source on a different platform other than our own.
And I get it. They don't want to hire someone to be the social media person because we are small and don't have the budget for that. But it's 2024. There are many people. Many staff. That have a lot of downtime (not my department unless it's the summer) and this could be the perfect task to give them. Even if it's just coming up with ideas to present. Not even necessarily filming anything. And videos don't need to show anyone's face or voice. We could literally do the most basic shit and it would be beneficial. It would count down on the number of calls we get and my coworkers and I would have time to do our jobs instead of spending half our time on the phone (do not ask how behind we are because it is sad).
There's something else I want to say about a different organization that I think this would help with but I cannot say without giving away where I work and also I can't bitch about our partner without causing problems. But if you live in the USA, you know about our partner, and I guarantee you hate them. But not as much as me. Never as much as me.
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The Meetup
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《Part 2 for Next Caller
《Pairings:College!Eddie Munson x shyfem!reader
《Summary: After your call with Eddie, you can't get him off your mind. You promised yourself to let your fears go and finally speak with him in person. Some things don't go as originally planned because Eddie just so happens to walk into your coffee shop.
《Warnings:fluff,smut. 90s!Eddie, a little tiny bit of dry humping, oral ( female & male receiving) dirty talk, pet names (good girl, sweetheart) phone sex, masturbation (male). Sex toys (fleshlight)
Word count: 7.7k
A/n: Please reblog like and leave a comment to show support. Not proofread ignore any mistakes you come across.
Disclaimer: Please read part one linked at the top to understand the rest of the story.
Mini series masterlist
18+ minors dni
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Almost a few days after the stunt, you pulled on the radio with Eddie it didn't take long before word got around on campus. It's all anyone could talk about they wanted to know who the mystery caller was, and Eddie seemed to be cornered more so than usual. As people surrounded him, he wished maybe one of them were you. Hiding amongst the crowd of people.
Anytime a woman called in, his assistant would jump out his skin. He knew he should have shut it down the moment it started, but he trusted Eddie. Now, anytime the phone rings, he instantly goes into a frenzied panic. Eddie just laughs at how over dramatic he was being. He knew if someone called in trying to pull the same stunt as you did, he'd turn them away. He's not gonna tell his assistant that, though. He likes how jumpy and absolutely horrified he gets when there is a female voice on the other end of the line.
You still listened in every show since that night. Almost every time someone called in, they would either want to do what you did or want to talk about you. One thing that pretty much kinda bothered you were some of the girls calling and pretending to be you. Sometimes, you felt like it was bait, and someone was just trying to get the real "Miss caller" to give away her true identity. Much like how tonight was going, if you were tired of it, you can only imagine how he must feel.
"Yeah hi its me calling you back." An unfamiliar female voice spoke.
"Nice try, you don't really sound anything like her, buh-bye." His voice etched with annoyance as he hung up on the fifth woman of the night.
"Anyone want to call in and talk about I' dunno sports?" He sounded absolutely over it.
"I'm fucking desperate over here."
He emitted a long sigh into the mic. "Can someone call in with an embarrassing or some shit?"
You begin to drown out the sound of him talking as he tries to move along the segment.
You felt bad you truly did for what was happening to him now. You don't regret choosing him to help you, but you wish the circumstances were a little different. You hope he didn't hate you for this. You don't think you could live with yourself if he did.
Eddie on the other hand couldn't get you off his mind. You infested it, and no matter how hard he tried to think of over things, you creeped your way back in. He dreamt of you, and every dream was the same. He could hear you speaking to him, but right when he got close enough to reveal who you were, he'd wake up.
He got absolutely chewed out by his boss that following day. His show was close to being taken off the air, but once they saw how much buzz it was getting, they decided against it. He was on thin ice, though, when it came to how raunchy his segment was allowed to get. The conversation made local news in your town, which created more concerns for you.
The thought of someone figuring out how to trace your call back to your home terrified you to no end. Could they even do something like that? You don't know and definitely don't want to find out. Eddie did make a promise to keep you anonymous, but that didn't mean everyone else who worked there did. You try to push the paranoia to the back of your mind and just put all of your focus on school and work. This whole situation should blow over shortly you hoped.
Even with all of the chaos at your campus right now, that still didn't persuade from wanting to go see him play Thursday. Which was perfect timing since your roommate was going out of town that same day. Leaving you to an empty home all to by yourself. Who knows, maybe you'd get lucky and take him home. It was wishful thinking on your part, but still, it could happen.
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Little did you know you didn't need to wait that long to see him after all. As you just rang up a customer's coffee order, he was next in line. He was too preoccupied looking at all the coffee options on the menu to see he's the next one to in line. You cleared your throat to get his attention and he looked right at you.
Your heart felt like it was in your throat when his eyes met yours. He looked very good today, making it much harder for you to focus. He had his hair pulled back and wore a oversized black corduroy button-up shirt with black ripped jeans. He gave an apologetic smile for holding you up.
"Uhhh, sorry, I really don't know what this shit means." He laughs, pointing back to the menu above.
Your mouth goes dry, and you try to play it cool.
"Well, what kind of coffee do you usually like?" You asked, trying to forget about who's standing before you. He's just some guy you kept reminding yourself.
He pressed his lips in a thin line, "Well, i usually don't drink coffee. if I did, I guess I wouldn't want it to taste like ass."
"So whatever you suggest."
You giggle and smile, turning to look at the menu as well. "I'd suggest maybe a vanilla latte. It's pretty basic."
"I'll take whatever you tell me to." He holds his hands up in surrender. "I'm putting all my faith in you."
"Wait a minute, are you implying im basic?" His mouth agape throwing a ringed hand over his heart pretending to be offended.
He was toying with you hoping to get you to laugh but instead you panicked.
Swallowing hard." N-no...its just a pretty standard drink to order."
"Hey, it's cool. I'm messing around." He reassured.
"Oh..um okay well then."
You try to regain your composure as your face begins to tingle.
"Okay, and what size? Small, medium, or large? " You asked him, trying to hide the fact that you're rapidly about to lose your mind.
"Oh, I need a large."
You nodded, putting in his order and ringing him up. He stands there a moment too long, and it's making you a little nervous. "Do I know you from somewhere?"
Your eyes grow wide, and you quickly turn to look away.
"Nope." You shook your head.
"You sure? You seem so familiar to me." He bends down on his elbows leaning on the counter. He's trying to examine your face to remember where he knows you from.
"We may have a had a class together at some point." You shrug.
"I mean yeah--but I don't know there is something else." He continued staring while you ran around behind the counter, putting away fresh croissant.
The longer it took for his latte to be finished, the more anxious you got. He wouldn't stop looking at you. You wanted to tell him it's rude to stare, but you don't. He kept trying to make small talk with you, which didn't help your nerves at all. You kept stumbling over your words or clearing your throat because it was getting dry.
You took a breath of fresh air when they finally called his order number. He took his coffee and waited around until you came back. "So, uhh, I don't know if this weird, but you wouldn't be apposed to going on a date with me?"
You blinked twice trying to figure out if you just heard him correctly.
"Come again?" You ask in disbelief.
"Oh, well, I was wondering if I could take you on a date?" He repeated as a small blush creeped along his cheeks.
"Yeah, sure. I mean, I'd love to." You tried to keep your cool, but on the inside, you were jumping for joy.
His smile grows ten times wider when he hears you accept his date. "Great, write down your address and phone number so we can keep in contact."
You nodded and ran to grab a pin and paper, giving him all of the information he needed. He also wrote down his number to give to you as well, just in case you needed to get in touch before your date.
"Cool, how's Friday sound?" He asks, taking the piece of paper you handed him. "Friday sounds great, actually."
"My names Eddie, by the way." He added motioning to himself.
He smiled again, taking a sip of coffee as he began heading for the door. He turns to look at you one last time before leaving. "I'll see you Friday, pretty girl."
"Thanks a latte." He joked, holding up his cup before finally exiting the coffee shop. His face scrunched up with embarrassment as he turned to leave. Why the fuck did I just say that? He thought to himself as he practically chugged down his drink, heading to his first lecture of the day.
You're standing still behind the counter, frozen in place. Did that really just happen? That fast? You started to think someone was pulling a prank on you. Maybe everyone did find out you were the caller and decided to mess with around. No, Eddie doesn't seem like the type of guy who would do something like that, you thought. You just couldn't get over how easy that was, a little too easy.
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The week went by way too fast for you, and the closer it got to your date, the more anxious you became. You wanted to tell him so badly it was you who called. Would he even still like you after that? He seemed just as eager to meet you as you wanted to meet him. Doesn't really matter now. You'd tell him eventually anyway. Especially if this date goes well.
You didn't see or hear from him too much during the days leading up to Friday. You figured he was very busy since he still was doing his show on the radio and playing with his band. On top of attending classes, he seemed like he didn't have much free time. Which is why you didn't cancel on him like you were probably going to. After you thought about it for a while, you realized he definitely was making the time to take you out.
Eddie called you a few times to check in and see if you were still willing to go out with him. He'd make small talk to ask how you were and if your classes were going well. He'd crack a joke or two, making you laugh easing your mind of any self doubt you had before.
Now that it was officially Friday evening, you quickly left work early to go home and get ready. He said he'd be come by eight o'clock to pick you up, giving you a few hours to decide what to wear. You searched through each article of clothing hating every single piece. You know deep down he doesn't care about what clothes you're wearing. He asked you out while you were in your work attire. With your coffee stained apron and dumb hat.
Still, you wanted to look nice for him, and you don't get out much as it is. So you opted for just a simple black dress. Dowsing yourself in a sweet perfume and putting on a pair of heels. You pray you don't end up falling and busting your ass in front of him tonight. You were shaved, plucked, and smelt of vanilla and spice.
You were just putting the last touches to your makeup on when you heard a knock at your front door. You did a last mirror check, making sure everything looked well put together. You take a long, deep breath and exhale before you go to open up for him.
When you opened the door to greet him, he was standing there with one hand in his pocket. While the other is holding a bouquet of flowers. He wore a black pullover sweater with the sleeves pulled up to his elbows, revealing his tattooed arms. His dark curly hair loose around his shoulders, and he smelled like mint and tobacco. His smile widened when he saw you for the first time since your last meeting. His dimples on full display, and you couldn't help but melt a little. "You look beautiful."
"Thanks. You don't look too bad, either." You smile, stepping out to stand closer to him. "Nah, I just wanted to impress you."
He blushes, and this is the second time you've seen him do that. He gave a boyish smile and handed you the bouquet of flowers he picked. "These are for you, sweetheart."
"Thank you." You reached out to accept the flowers. "They're beautiful."
There is a moment where you both don't say a word and just stand there gazing at one another.
Eddie cleared his throat. "Shall we?"
You nodded, closing the door behind you and making your way to his van. He walked next to you with a hand on the small of your back. He moved past you quickly to open the door and help you get into the passenger seat. Eddie made his way to the driver side and hopped in no longer after you.
The drive to the restaurant was fairly quiet except for the music playing on Eddie's radio. He humed along, tapping his thumbs on the steering wheel to the beat. You both steal glances here and there when the other isn't looking. Your heart beating a mile a minute.
Eddie seemed calm and collected, but on the inside, he felt just the same. Usually, he was pretty confident around women, but there was something about you that made his heart skip a beat. He doesn't know what it is that pulled him in so quickly. He's not complaining one bit either.
You finally see the restaurant up a head and sigh in relief. He pulled up and parked in the front. He made you wait there while he jumped out of the driver side to jog over to help open up your door. You took his hand and carefully got out while trying not to flash anyone in the process. You wish the dress you finally decided on wasn't so short.
You make your way inside where a hostess greets you both and guides you to a table in the far back. You sit across from one another while she handed you a menu to look over. A waitress soon comes by to ask what drinks you'd like, and you both settle on a Dr pepper.
She returned not too much longer to take your orders and set down your drinks. You and him seemed to be in sync tonight since the both of you ordered a burger with onion rings on the side. Once she took your order, she left, leaving you alone together again.
"So I'm gonna ask a boring question and say what do you enjoy doing for fun?" He playfully asked, taking a sip of his soda.
"Uh, well, I haven't been having much fun lately with work and school taking up my time." You confessed feeling a little embarrassed you don't live an exciting life you imagined he did.
"You don't hang out with friends or go out?" His brows furrowed.
You play around with a piece of paper on the table, avoiding his gaze. "Uh, well, I don't have that many friends here."
"I mostly just keep to myself and stay home a lot." You continued on.
He frowns. "Boyfriends?"
You shake your head, trying not to even think about any of your exes at a time like this.
"You know what? I'm sorry. I shouldn't ask about boyfriends while in the middle of a date." He gave an apologetic smile.
"Hope he doesn't mind sharing you for the night, though." He winked, making you laugh.
He seems to enjoy making you laugh when he notices you're uncomfortable or getting shy.
The waitress finally arrived back with your food, and you didn't hesitate to start eating immediately. He watched you with amusement and started eating right behind you. The longer you both talked, the more relaxed you became.
You were already familiar with him and found a form of comfort when listening to his show. But being alone with him felt different. You never thought this moment would come. You almost wanted to cry, thinking it was just some elaborate dream that you'd soon wake up from. The date was going amazing so far, and you never wanted it to end.
"So, um, how's your show going?" You ask him, not wanting to seem like he was the only one asking the questions.
"It's good..well actually I'm in some trouble, but they'll live. More people are listening in now, so I think the money will shut them up." He openly admited, shoving an onion ring in his mouth.
You raise an eyebrow "in trouble for what?"
You already knew but wanted to hear him say. You kept wondering what he thought about that phone call. Even if it might hurt your feelings, you were dying to know. Your curiosity always got the best of you.
He shakes his head. "Maybe I'll talk about it on our second date."
You giggle, finishing off the last bit of your dinner. "What do you like to do for fun?"
"Well, I play DnD when I have extra free time, I play with my band at the bar by campus." He frowned a little at the mention of his band.
"Sadly, we probably won't be playing much together here very soon." He adds.
Changing the subject quickly, not wanting to bring the mood down. "Girlfriends?"
"No girlfriends."
He eyed you up and down, grinning wide poking his tongue on the inside of his cheek. You swear you could see a little twinkle in his eye.
He leans forward, getting awfully close. " You almost ready to go?"
"Um sure, yeah." You respond a little sadly, not wanting the night to end so soon. He waves for the waitress to bring over the bill. Once he was done paying, you both got back in his vans.
The van ride back to your place wasn't as awkward as before, but there was something electric in the air. There is too much tension between the two of you. It felt like the silence was lingering until one of you decided to make the first move.
He pulls up in front of your home and helps you step out of the passenger side. Both of you walking up to your front door, not speaking. This was your chance to invite him in. You thought to yourself. "I had fun tonight."
"Yeah, me too." He smiled, putting his hands back in pockets.
You look up at him and whisper. " Do you want to come in?"
He paused for a moment, hoping he heard you correctly before answering. "Yeah, I'd love to come in."
You unlock the front door and take his hand, pulling him inside and guiding him to your bedroom.
The moment he was finally in his lips, crashed onto yours in a heated kiss. The kiss was sloppy and passionate as your tongues fought for dominance. Your lipstick smears on his mouth. He breaks away to move down your jaw and nip at your neck right under your ear. He nibbled and sucked at your tender skin, causing your knees to buckle. You grabbed onto his biceps, holding on tightly to keep your balance.
He stops to look at you in your eyes. "You wanna get undressed for me?"
You swallowed hard and nodded.
"Words, pretty girl." His voice is low and husky.
"Yes." You panted.
Eddie reaches around to unzip the back of your dress, letting it pool around your feet. He squates down his face mere inches from your heat. He looks up at you through his long lashes. He kisses your tummy right above the waistband of your panties before reaching to grab your ankle. He brought it forward to unclasp your heel. Your hands grip onto his shoulders, steadying yourself. He tosses the shoe to the side before moving to the next one and doing the same.
He stands up, reaching around your back again, unhooking your bra, and letting it fall to the floor, exposing your breasts. Your nipples harden in the cool air of your bedroom. You watch him as he takes his shirt off, exposing his bare chest to you. You notice tattoos you've never seen before. One of a faded demon on his peck and a black widow right under his clavicle. "Be a good girl and lay back on the bed."
You hesitate for a moment as your mind is already feeling hazy. You turned to slowly make your way up the bed, laying back against your pillows. You watch as he took his boots off and unbuckeld his jeans, letting them hang low on his hips. He seductively crawls his way up until he is hovering above you.
You push on his chest. "Umm....I don't think it's a good idea if we have sex."
He sit back on his knees. "Want me to leave?"
"No, we can do other stuff. I'm just not ready to do that." You confessed.
"Hey, we don't have to do anything you don't want to." He reassured you, bringing a hand to gently cup your cheek.
You let out a shakey breath, feeling a little more comfortable . You were worried he would be mad at you, but he wasn't.
"If you don't like anything I'm doing, don't be afraid to tell me,okay?" He's being sincere, you can tell. He wanted you to feel safe with him.
You nodded again. "Okay, i will."
"Good." He smiled and leaned down to give you another kiss to your lips.
He brought his hips against yours grinding his hard cock against your core. You moan in his mouth when his cock applies pressure to your clit over your panties. He pushes against you harder, causing him to grunt. He moved to lay by your side, pressing his front right up against you. His fingers dance and play with the waistband of your panties. You can feel his prominent buldge pressing against your outer thigh. His calloused fingers slowly slips past the delicate lace. You can feel him brushing past your clit. He carefully glides his middle finger in between your wet fold, collecting your slick on his finger. Ignoring your aching bud in the process.
"Fuck you're so wet." He murmured against your mouth.
He pushes one finger inside your entrance, pumping it agonizingly slow. Your head falls back, giving him the perfect opportunity to attack your neck. He nips and sucks on the skin by your ear. Biting, licking, and sucking while his finger is knuckle deep in your pussy. He adds another stretching you open around his thick fingers. His thumb pressing firmly on your clit. You squeezed your eyes shut and let out gasp.
"Think of my cock pretty girl." He whispered curving his fingers upward.
"Mmm!, s-so good." You whimper.
That's all you could respond with your mind completely gone. All you could do was focus on how he seemed determined to make you feel good. You feel him smile against your neck when where his lips were leaving feather like kisses all over. You clench around him as his fingers start working on that sweet spot on your walls.
"F-fuck." You let out a strangled moan bucking your hips.
He grinds his cock against your thigh. "Feel that?"
"Feel how hard I am for you?"
You look up at him with big doe eyes."y-yes I can feel you."
His picks up the pace, his fingers plunging in and out, making your head spin. Your pussy wet and loud taking his middle and ring finger. The tightness in your core building with each pump of fingers. Your moans getting more pornographic. His warm breath on your neck making you squirm.
"You're such a messy girl. My hand is getting soaked." He purrs in your ear.
He ruts harder against your thigh, violently rocking your bed.
"Can I taste you?" He rasped.
You let out groan. "Please"
You swallow hard as your heart feels like it's beating out of your chest. You're already breathless. A small frown forms on your face when you feel his thick fingers leaving from inside of you.
"Ah ah, no pouting." He wiggled his index finger at you playfully.
No one has ever done this to you before. None of your exes cared about your pleasure they only wanted to get themselves off and then leave you to handle the rest. Eddie was the first man to help you cum and now he's going to be the first man to taste you. All of your ex boyfriends were selfish lovers. Which brought on so many insecurities you've been working hard to overcome. There was a part of you that didn't want him to keep going, but there was another part that was telling you to let go and enjoy it.
He gave you one last deep kiss on your lips before moving and kissing his way down right above your sex. He looked up at you again, and his pupils were blown out with lust. He never breaks eye contact as he slowly drags your panties down your legs. He sits up higher for a moment, admiring your naked body spread out before him. You went to close your legs, but he stopped you. "Let me see you."
Thats all you needed to hear before spreading them wider for him.
He cursed under his breath, closing his eyes, trying not to attack the moment you show yourself to him. "I'm gonna make you feel so fucking good."
He dips down again, his face so close to your pussy now. He hums in approval when he sees how soaked you are for him. Your slick dripping down to the curve of your ass. He kisses the inside of your thighs, testing to see how much you can take before you're begging him for more. It doesn't take long before you're already impatient. He nips and sucks at the soft skin, making you buck up against his face. His nose nudging your throbbing clit.
"Patience, sweetheart." He laughed.
You buck up again, wanting desperately wanting his mouth.
Without warning, you feel his warm tongue licking a long strip between your wet folds. You sucked in a breath, never having felt something like this before. "OOh!,Eddie." You mewled
He pulls you down hard against his face, grunting against you. He sucks and laps at your folds, letting your slick cover his face. You grind against his mouth, throwing your head back against the pillows. Your legs go to squeeze around his head, but his strong hands hold them in place. He takes his tongue to flick across your clit making you wriggle. His mouth attaches to your sensitive bud, and he sucks on it softly. You went to push his head away as the sensation is too much. He removed his mouth, checking see to see if you're okay. "You okay?"
"Why'd you stop?" You whined.
He smiled before reattaching his plump lips to your clit slurping and flicking his tongue over it. He watches as you writhe above him. His eyes never left you as he almost seemed mesmerized by the sight before him. You've never felt this desired by anyone before. Your hips bucking as you grind on his face as he begins sucking harder on your aching clit.
You grip the blankets beneath you. "i-im getting close."
His removes a hand from one of your thighs and carefully pushes one finger inside your entrance. You grab and pull on his hair, making him grunt against you. He adds another finger, curving them upwards to stroke that sweet spot on your walls.
Removing his mouth for a moment "Yeah is my good girl gonna cum?" He asked quickly reattaching his lips to your sore clit. Your backing arching off the bed as you pull on his hair some more.
Your walls pulsating around him as his fingers pump in out of you fast. His mouth sucking on your clit harshly as his fingers plunge deep inside your pussy. The wet noises his mouth is making as his tastes you, mixed with the squelching of your pussy fill the room.
He's lapping away at you, getting lost in your taste, driving you absolutely wild.
"Mmphf! Don't stop." You begged him.
You feel that all too familiar tightness building again, and you clench around his fingers. Your legs are twitcing and trembling. You're breathing harder than before. Your eyes roll to the back of your head as your orgasm washes over you fast, leaving your body to shake. Eddies mouth never letting go of your clit. While his skilled fingers work on your pussy helping you ride out your orgasm.
He removes his mouth and fingers from you tenderly, not wanting to hurt you in any kind of way. His face glistening with your slick and his lips look swollen. He moves to lay next to you on your bed. You're slowly coming down from your high. Your breathing evening out as you come to. You both lay there in silence for a few minutes.
"Can I taste you now?" Your voice sounding small as you asked.
"Fuck." He murmured under his breath.
"Yeah, you can taste me." He whispers back.
Moving to sit back between his legs, you reached to take off his pants off. He helped you by wiggling them down his legs and discarding them to the floor. You notice how painfully hard he is in his boxers, and you lick your lips. Hooking your fingers in the waistband of his boxers and pulling them down. His his cock spring free hitting his belly button. The head an angry red leaking precum down his shaft. He hisses when the cool air hits sensitive his tip. Your eyes widened at the size of him. You now know he was telling the truth. He was big, and you don't know how you're gonna be able to fit all of him in your mouth.
He grabs it, giving it a few light strokes eagerly waiting for your mouth. Precum still dripping alongside it, getting on his hand.
"Don't be shy." His voice low and deep just like how he spoke to you that night on the radio. "I hope you'll let me be inside you one day."
"You'd like that, wouldn't you? He bites his lip, waiting for your response.
"Yes." Your voice barely above a whisper.
His eyebrows raise, and a cocky grin spreads across his face. "You felt so tight taking my fingers. I can only imagine how you must feel when I'm spreading you open."
"Just thinking about you taking my cock. The little noises you'd make as you're begging for more."
He presses his thumb on the leaking slit his mouth forming an O shape at the pressure. The veins along his shaft are prominent from the amount of blood rushing to his cock.
"Making you cry because it feels so good." He's breathing heavier while eyeing you in front of him. He wants to get you worked up until you can't take it anymore. Teasing was his favorite part before anything. He didnt even have to touch anyone before he had them begging to be fucked in some type of way.
He kept going on. The way he was speaking to you brought you right back to the night you called him. You squeeze your thighs tightly together, desperate for any small amount of friction.
"Gonna think about that tight pussy when I'm cuming down your throat." His voice deep and seductive. "You'd like that, wouldn't you?"
Hes thinking about all the ways he'd fuck you. Imagining what your pretty tits would look like with his cum is dripping down them. Filling you up with his cum and watching it dripping out after removing his cock.
Watching him stroke his cock as he thinks about fucking you makes your pussy flutter. You wonder what he must feel like. The feeling of him stretching you open. You're getting tired of him taunting you. You needed to taste him now.
You smacked his hand away, replacing it with your own, giving it a few more light strokes. You move your thumb to press down on his tip. He grunts and bangs his head back against your headboard. You bend down to give the head of his cock a quick peck. You remove your hand and spit into it as you grasp his thick shaft, rubbing it up and down lazily. His mouth hangs open as relaxes and enjoys what you're doing.
Moving your mouth closer, you kitten licked at his tip, tasting his precum. His thrusts his hips as you continue teasing him like he did to you earlier. You take the opportunity to pull away and spit directly on his cock earning you low groan deep from his chest. You begin to suck on the head of cock. Using your spit mixed with his precum as a lubricant to continue stroking his hard length with your hand.
Gliding your mouth down his length until he's hitting the back of your throat, making you gag a little. You removed your hand, resting them on his thighs. You try relaxing your throat while taking as much of him in your mouth as you can. He wasn't even all the way in, and he's already has you gagging. Tears leaking from your eyes smudging your mascara.
"Oh! fuck!, c-careful, sweetheart." He coaxed you.
Drool spilling down your chin as you try to take more of him in your throat. You attempt to keep him back there and focus on breathing from your nose. Sucking lightly on him, you pull him all the way out and swirl your tongue around his tip. "Hmm! your mouth feels so fucking good."
Your tongue wet and warm teasing the head of his cock. Eddie does everything in his power to not push you back down on his length.
He breathed heavily. "Shit! I-I not gonna last if you keep doing that."
Removing his cock from your mouth, creating a loud pop in his absence.
"you like it when I tease your cock eddie?"You asked in a sultry voice.
You wanted to give him a taste of his own medicine.
"Look who's not so shy afterall." He taunted you
You don't know what has come over you suddenly, but having him here in your bed tonight gave you a boost of confidence you never knew you had.
Putting the head of his cock to your mouth sucking it firmly almost forcing him to answer. "Y-yeah I like...I like the way you're teasing me."
You slip his length back down as far he could go in your throat, swallowing around him.
Hearing him like that only spurred you on more. Sucking his cock a little harder than before. Your head bobbing up and down faster. Your other hand moves to cup his balls, and he jerks at the feeling. The sensation of you massaging his balls and your mouth working on his cock practically sends him into a coma of bliss. His abs flexing and his toes curl. His entire body glistened with sweat. "Shit i-im gonna fuck... I'm gonna cum."
"You're gonna make me cum." He panted above you.
With a few more pumps of your hand and mouth sucking harder on his length. You feel his cock twitch and he's shooting his cum deep down your throat. Some spilling out and leaked from the corners of your mouth. He moans out loud and holds your head down until he's finished. You tried to swallow as much of him as you could take. Your mouth not leaving until you're collecting every bit. " S-sweetheart, please."
You let him go with a long string of saliva connecting you to his cock, his cum dripping down your chin. You collect it on your fingertips, bringing it to your mouth, not wanting to waste a drop. Sucking your fingers clean enjoying the salty taste of his cum.
He goes limp as he comes down from his high. His eyes glossed over watching your every move as you lick his cum from your fingers.
You moved to lay back next to him as you wait to see if he will soon leave. His chest rose and fell calmly now, but his head was still foggy. You don't want him to go, but you understand if he does.
"Thank you for tonight" you turn to smile weakly at him.
"No problem." He snorted.
There is a long, drawn-out pause, and you decided it time to tell him your secret.
"Um, I have something to confess to you." You're nervous, and he can tell.
He sit up straight and looks over at you, concern etched on his face. "Yeah? "
"Well, umm, I was the one who called you that night.....on your show." You confessed, looking down, playing with your thumbs.
He blinked, taking in what you just said. Not really sure if he heard you right or if he's still a little dazed.
"Are-- are you serious? " He sounded a little harsh, but he didn't intend to. That night was all he could think about since it happened. You were all he could think about. He lost hours and hours of sleep coming up with different possible scenarios on how he would find you. Who you could possibly be.
"Yeah. Are you mad?" You look over at him, tears threatening to spill from your eyes.
His face softens immediately when he notices. "Are you kidding?"
"I've been thinking about you ever since." He sprang up on his knees with excitement scooting closer to you.
You wipe at your eyes and laugh when he takes your hands into his. The fear that was building up moments ago slowly fading away."Really?"
"Oh, you're definitely not getting rid of me now." He exclaimed.
"So, do you maybe want to go out again?" You shyly asked.
"Fuck yeah I do!" He celebrated clapping his his hands together.
You laughed at his excitement. Making you feel so much better now that you got that off your chest. No one has ever made you feel like this before. You felt like you've known him forever even though you just met in person. "Can I call you... like all the time?"
"Yes, absolutely you can." You giggle.
"Hope you don't mind late night ramblings and bad puns," He advised.
"I love bad puns."
He laid back down next, throwing an arm around you. The both of you stayed like that for the rest of the night. Staying up for hours laughing and telling each other stories about your life. You wish you and him didn't have to ever leave this bed.
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Another couple of days have passed, and you really haven't heard much again from him since your date. You were starting to think he was just saying all of that stuff because he thought it was something you wanted to hear. You tried not to think like that and just chalked it up to him being extremely busy because he was.
He did talk about you a little bit on his show but never mentioned you were also the mystery caller everyone has been gossiping about. You listened in biting at your nails when he talked about going on a date with a cutie from the coffee shop across from campus.
Eddie never once talked about hooking up with you, and you're grateful for that. He didn't use your date as a way to have another story for his show. He genuinely wanted to take you out and have a nice time. He didn't hook up for a new story to keep his segment interesting. Most of the girls he was with actually asked him to talk about it. Otherwise, he never would have done it to begin with.
You sat on your bed feet dangling over the side, contemplating if you should just bite the bullet and call first. You don't wanna seem desperate, but you also really want to see him again. He agreed to go on another date with you. Since you haven't heard much else from him, you don't want to come off pushy.
Maybe you should call first? Let him know you're equally as interested in him.
You snatch up the phone and the little piece of paper he gave with his number on it. Putting in the digits and waiting for the dial tone to start ringing. You felt like you were waiting forever, but it's only been a few seconds. You were almost ready to hang up and pretend this never happened until you heard him answer.
"H-hello?" He panted into the phone.
He sounded like he was currently in the middle of something. What that something is you don't know yet.
"Hi, it's me....just wanted to call and check in with you." You spoke softly in the other end.
"Y-yeah, uhh, I'm doing good." He stumbled over his words.
He sounded out of breath, and now you're really hoping you didn't interrupt him. Especially if he has company at his place. The thought of that makes you feel a little sick. You're not dating him and barely even know him. You shouldn't feel this way even if he did have someone over. "I can let you go. You seem a little busy."
"Wait, don't hang up!" He exclaimed.
He ponders for a moment on how he can keep you on the other line.
"Wanna help me...with... something? " he asked with a nervous laugh.
You swallow hard before answering. "What do you need?"
You hear him curse under his breath in your ear. Low grunts can be heard, and it doesn't take long before you can figure out what's going on.
"W--wanna talk to you while I fuck this toy." He breathed heavy.
You go to lay back on your bed playing with the hem of your pajama shorts. You know what he wants you to do. Since he helped you out, you might as well do the same for him. It's only fair, right? The last time you did this, hundreds of people were listening. This time, it's just the two of you. Making the situation more intimate, but it also helps take the edge off.
Eddie was currently balls deep in his fleshlight when you called. He just got out of the shower hair still wet and sticking to his body. All day long, he kept thinking about you. He's been painfully hard and wanted to see if he could come over to your place again but didn't want to be so forward. He didn't want you to think he was using you to get off. He really really liked you and hoped there could be something more between the two of you. So he was going to do what he normally would and take of it himself. That was until you called him, and it sparked a little idea in his brain.
He was leaning back against a wall with one hand on a chair next to him, trying to keep his balance upright. Lube was all over his toy, leaking out onto the soft curls between his legs and balls. He glided the toy up and down his length at a steady pace trying not to cum so soon already. His mind races with vivid thoughts of you.
"What do you think about when you do that?" Your voice coming out so small in his ear.
He smiles to himself. "Well I--was thinking about you."
"Like, what exactly?" You played innocent.
Eddie knows what game you're playing, and he has no problem going along with it. He pulls his cock almost all the way out of the toy only to slam it back down hard causing him to groan loud. His legs almost giving out from under him. He pulled out the chair next to him and plopped down.
Biting his lip to stifle another moan.
"Thinkin' about you squeezing around me." He breathed heavily in your ear. "Wishing this was your pussy instead of some..F-fucking toy."
Sinking his cock back inside making a loud schlick noise you can faintly hear in the phone. Pumping his cock while his other hand runs along his abdomen. He's trying to balance the phone between his shoulder and cheek praying he doesnt drop it. His face and chest flushed a crimson red. He lets out a loud moan when he thrusts upward. "Ooh! Shit!"
"Did I feel good?" You purred into the phone.
"God yes--- so fucking tight. the way you hugged my fingers when i was knuckle deep inside you."
You squeeze your thighs together involuntarily, and you can feel a wetness pool in between your legs. You bite down on your lip hard listening as he fucks himself while talking about you. You want to touch yourself so badly. Your nipples hardening under the sheer thin material of your tank top.
Pumping his cock faster in the toy, lube splashing all over his pelvis and wrist dripping down onto the of floor. He's making a total mess and he doesn't care. He thinks about how messy he could make you.
You interrupt him from his thoughts
"What do you wanna do to me?" You whisper.
"Fuuuck, I wanna do the nastiest things to you." His voice ragged.
Moving the toy up and down his cock as he spoke in the phone, trying to keep It balanced as best he could.
He lets out whimper, "Wanna fill you up with my cum and clean it out of you with my tongue."
"W-wanna..fuuuck...wanna cum all over those pretty tits." He's panting and grunting louder in your ear.
....."Yeah?" You cooed.
"Make you cum in all sorts of ways you never even imagined you could."
He legs kick up, and his stomach tightens. He was getting close but didn't want this to end, not yet.
You're still lying in bed, looking up at your ceiling. You never thought you'd have this burst of confidence yet again, but it's different with him. You don't feel ashamed of anything. The way he's coming undone just by talking to you only made you never want to stop. You felt empowered.
There is a throbbing ache between your legs that you desperately want to take care of. You try to ignore it and put all of your focus on him. You wiggle around clenching up. Doing anything to ease that ache.
"Tell me what you think about you when you touch yourself." He breathed.
"You think of me?"
"Yeah," you muttered quietly.
"So tell me." He commanded gently.
You stammered. "I um, I think about what you would feel like inside me."
"Oh yeah?" His voice getting low.
Goosebumps prickle all over your skin when he does that voice. You squirm in your bed just thinking about that night he used it when he helped you cum over the phone. It was domineering and seductive.
"Mmhm, you're so big." You whimper.
"I don't think I could fit all of you."
"Fuuuck." He groans
"You wanna feel my cock struggling to stretch you open? Is that it?"
You whined into the phone. "Yes, I need it so bad Eddie."
His cock steadily plunging in out of his toy in a brutal pace. He's getting closer to his release, and the phone drops with a loud thud in your ear. His other hand moving to cup his balls mimicking how you massaged them. His hips thrusting up and all you can hear is the squelching sound his cock is making in the toy.
"Oooh shit!" He groaned louder. With a few more strokes and he's spilling his cum inside the toy. Still pumping his length, milking himself of every drop. His cum spilling out and coating his balls. He lays there in the chair, head falling back before realizing he dropped the phone. His head all foggy, and his vision is blury.
He went to get up, but his legs gave out, and he fell back down.
"Shit"
"Fuck"
You heard him cursing from afar. You laughed to yourself, knowing he probably had fallen down.
"Hang on!" He called out
He leans over and reaches out far to snatch up the phone off the floor. His breathing is ragged when he goes to talk. "I've never came that hard in my life."
Smacking a hand on his belly he changes the subject.
"Okay, so what were you originally calling me about? " He asked still panting in the phone.
"Umm, well, I wanted to see if you were still up for going out again....Maybe?" You closed your eyes, waiting for his response.
"Yeah, actually, you know my band is playing Wednesday. Why don't you come see us." He said matter of factly. Like you didn't just help him jerk off on the other line.
You don't understand how one minute he can say some of the most dirtiest things to you and the next be totally nonchalant. All you want to do now is hang up and take care of the ache between your legs.
"I'd love to!" You accept his offer excitement etched in your tone.
He lets out a laugh. "Great, it's a date."
Before you both go to hang up, he stops you.
..."Oh, and thank you for helping me this time." His tone sultry.
Your eyebrows shot up, and you gulp. "No problem--it was fun."
"Goodnight, Eddie." You said sweetly.
"Goodnight, sweetheart."
You both stay on the line, neither one wanting to be the first to hang up. Eventually, you had to hang up first since it seemed like he wasn't going to be the one to do it. You roll over on your side, trying to relax and ready yourself for sleep. Your mind racing with excitement that you're finally going to see him play.
Maybe after your date, Eddie can take you back to his place this time. The ache between your legs was not subsiding. You needed him, and after your date, you decided it was time to have him.
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lyneira · 2 years ago
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♡ "carry me pls" ♡
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-> how would the the genshin men prefer to carry you?
(A bit on the crack side and slightly suggestive, hehe)
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Bridal style
KAVEH, Zhongli, Ayato, Xiao, Dainsleif
It's simple, yet refined and romantic. Plus, they enjoy being able to see your cute face and all of its expressions while holding you. They could easily lean their forehead against yours and kiss you like this.
On their shoulders
ITTO, Venti, Gorou, Childe
For those who like this position, they either want to prove their strength, want you to be their lookout, or they just want to have fun with you!
Okay okay, hear me out on Venti and Gorou. I know they're rather smol in comparison to the others, but I think they'd like carrying you like this primarily because it's a fun position and also because they don't want to be underestimated. Venti would totally try to persuade you to wear a sheet over you both so that you could pretend to be a ghost or monster to scare people ehe 👻
Itto and Childe would have you on their shoulders so not only would they prove how strong they are, they could have you as their lookout, watching for any dangers up ahead or cool sights that you see. (Also, their head in between your thighs would be heaven for them 😏)
Piggyback
DILUC, Alhaitham, Scaramouche, Cyno, Albedo, Tighnari
They like this because it's the most efficient way to carry you. You're not blocking their view, he's holding you tight, you're holding onto him tight, he can easily run if needed without you being in the way.
The only "downside" that they'd see to this would be how you can easily tease them in this position. You might tease them by whispering softly into their ear, or leaving a peck on their cheek while you're at it 🤭
Carries you in front of them
THOMA, Heizou, Kaeya, Kazuha
I don't know how else to explain this position but think of the opposite of a piggyback ride (so a piggy-front ride? 🥴 sounds silly), or like a parent carrying their sleeping child.
They feel like this is the ultimate hug as you're wrapping BOTH your arms and legs around them. Lowkey treats you like their baby, patting your back with one hand to soothe you. They'd enjoy the intimacy of the position and would find the way you were clinging to them absolutely adorable.
Bonus:
Over their shoulder
Alhaitham, Itto, Diluc, Cyno, Childe
Be ready to become a sack of potatoes if you're misbehaving. This category is reserved for those who are tired of your squirming or teasing so they'd simply throw you over their shoulder.
Kick and whine all you want, they're not going to carry you any other way for your actions. They might also teasingly slap your booty if you don't quit whining.
Other than that scenario, if you guys were being chased, he'd see this as the quickest way to carry you. He'll grab you and go, like a fast-food order LOL
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a/n: gahh I honestly had a hard time categorizing them. I feel like many of them could be applied to multiple categories
© 2023 lyneira. PLEASE DO NOT COPY, PLAGIARIZE, OR REPOST MY WRITING ONTO OTHER PLATFORMS
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inkskinned · 2 years ago
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there's this video you've probably seen already where a woman is shaking in front of a microphone and delicately tries to ask - how can i make my husband listen to me, i've tried everything, i don't want to seem ungrateful and the other man laughs - the problem is that you married a man, we're only listening 25% of the time and we only understand 5% of that! and the audience laughs and the woman laughs and you just sat there, phone in your hand, letting the sound of it echo
and the thing is that people make think-pieces about it (isn't this one of them) and satire versions and "flipping the script" which is good and fun but at the end of the day, there's some truth in that man's response about men-not-listening. and you have tried to language that feeling for years, this sense that you can only take up 33% of a conversation before others view it as being "dominating".
it's not that they aren't listening, it's that the action they're taking is purposefully silencing. it's different. you accidentally-don't-listen a lot; just because the world is loud and you're distracted. you don't mean anything by it. and the truth is that the man who spoke is relying on that to be true of you; the way it's true of everyone. but there is a different undertone to his kind of not-listening. what he means is they don't respect you and you shouldn't expect them to. there is a difference between oh shit i forgot to take the trash out and why didn't you remind me to do it, just like there is a difference between i didn't realize you wanted to go out this weekend and why do you expect me to plan things why can't you just tell me where we're going.
and the thing is that it isn't just him, and it's actually not just because of your gender - your skin, your class status, your weight, their ableism - it happens often. so often it feels like a tightness around your throat and a weight in your stomach. you're not even "really" allowed to be upset about it, because to them it's a joke. and they laugh. and you know exactly the amount of work that goes into every conversation. how you have to work to condense down your thoughts into intelligent, crisp soundbites; worried someone will try to swoop in and cut you off. and there's this sense from everyone else - oh stop being so sensitive, are you really upset just because they weren't listening and you don't know how to say the way that feels when it happens constantly.
there's that video of the science summit where a woman in the audience finally says let her speak please! and the whole crowd bursts into applause and the man leading the summit holds up his hands and bows his head and says oops, sorry! like what he did was awkward and embarrassing, a little social gaffe that happens easily. later in your meetings, you're asked to take notes, and you don't say anything, you just hear let her speak please! ringing in your head and know that you'll never be brave enough for that kind of thing. and besides. think of all the people who agree this was a one-off, he just got excited and all of the people who say one man is not indicative of all of society
at the dinner table you're talking about someone you don't like and how he's not good to his girlfriend and how she always has to remind him to put the effort in and before him, she was glowing with curiosity and passion but now she just seems... tired, unhappy. that he likes the way she burns out; she stays home and takes care of him and their 2 kids. and your father sniffs and says that men take a while to learn those kinds of things. and you just stare at him and think about your childhood and are like - no wonder i turned out like this
and you want to say - there's no fucking secret school or mystic form of communication. i was not sent to Rearing a Child University. i did not graduate from Getting Chores Done College. i ask questions and i listen and i pay attention, because that's basic fucking human decency. it stems from respect, and how i respect others and their agency. i clean the house because someone should clean. not because it comes "naturally".
hell, you had to google "how to boil an egg" the other day, just because you usually make them scrambled. you can never remember which of the 2 bathroom cleaners make chlorine gas, only that two of them definitely do. you've accidentally bleached your clothes. it took you like 3 years of self-teaching before you figured out how to actually cook things correctly - for that whole time, you burnt or undercooked everything. but you did teach yourself; just like you taught yourself how to listen with empathy. just like how you taught yourself to think before you speak. to be kind first, to be better at communicating. it seemed like a good thing, an adult thing.
the joke the man in the video makes is that women say i'm fine! when they are not fine. and you think about the 150 conversations that happened around that; about how she probably has had so many arguments with her husband. how she said i'm upset you don't take me anywhere and he got mad at her because of course i do, you made me go to that stupid restaurant like last week and she probably said that's not what i'm saying and he said now i'm supposed to be psychic or something and she said no of course not and he said how am i supposed to know what to do when you don't even like everything and she said i do like things and he said well how am i supposed to win? and her pastor probably told her to be more grateful because they do things at all, even if she has to plan them and her mom probably told her that's just how men are honey and she probably cried over her journal, trying to figure out why the fuck she "has everything" and is still so bitterly, horribly unhappy
and how, in your life, for so many reasons, you looked down the barrel of another argument; of explaining yourself and being vulnerable and begging for help again. how many times you just said i'm fine because it was better than doing that again; it was better than wringing yourself out when it's literally easier to just pretend. because he wasn't going to listen. your father wasn't going to be better and your boyfriend wasn't going to be better and your boss wasn't going to be more respectful.
and you sit in front of a video of a woman shaking, looking horrible and guilt-wrought that she's even asking this question. and you know; deep in your heart - that's you. in a different life, you are her. you've stood in her spot. and you had to listen while someone else cackled - why would we bother to notice when you talk?
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eternalxvenus · 8 months ago
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⇢ ˗ˏˋ broken promises pt. 3 ࿐ྂ
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summary: Rafe promised to take you out and spend your birthday with you, but you don’t hear from him all day and then suddenly he shows up at your door trying to explain.
wc: 1.4k
notes: part three out in less than 24hrs?!? who would've thought
previous chapters: part 1 | part 2
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Topper: hey we need to talk, it's about Rafe.
Your heartbeat started to pick up, but you weren't sure why. Topper didn't say it was anything bad, but you knew realistically he wouldn't be texting you unless it was.
You: hey Top, what's going on?
Topper: are you busy? can I swing by?
You: i'm on the mainland right now, can you tell me over text? i'm worried
Topper: yeah... so I don't know if you know but Rafe went to Kelce's party a couple days ago.
You: yeah I know
The sinking feeling in your chest lifts a little. You figured Topper was going to tell you Rafe had been doing coke since he knew Rafe was supposed to quit.
Topper: while he was there he started doing lines off the table. then a little later he started making out with Sofia. i'm not sure how far it went
You stared at the message for what felt like forever. Then a video pops up in the chat, so you click play.
There are some random people doing lines, but then in the back corner, you can see Rafe and his ex-girlfriend Sofia practically trying to eat each other's faces. You couldn't seem to find the energy to be sad about it. You felt almost indifferent but shocked at the same time.
You: thanks for letting me know Top
Topper: of course and just know you don't deserve that.
You click out of your messages and before you can think twice, your phone is ringing, waiting for your call to be picked up.
"Hello?" Rafe's voice came in through the speakers. He sounded tired but not like he had been asleep.
"Rafe. I'm going to ask you something, and I want you to tell me the truth." 
"Okay... what is it?"
There was silence as you took a deep breath. Your voice was smooth and calm as you asked, "Did you cheat on me?"
You heard shuffling on the other end of the line. "What?"
"Did you cheat on me, Rafe?"
"No, I didn't cheat on you. What is going on?" He sounded baffled by your question.
"Don't fucking lie to me, Rafe! I saw the video," You tried to keep your voice low since your parents were probably asleep.
"Baby what are you talking about I'm not lying! I didn't cheat on you. You know what, I'm coming to the mainland. I'll be over there soon." 
He ended the call before you could tell him not to bother. The last thing you wanted to see was his stupid face, knowing his lips were all over Sofia's, and God knows what else they did. 
At the beginning of your relationship you were really insecure because of his history with Sofia but Rafe always assured you that he wasn’t interested in her anymore. You laid in bed staring at the ceiling while the video played over and over in your head. All you could wonder was what made your relationship with Rafe go left so quickly. You felt like crying and punching Rafe all at once. He made you feel so much at one time it could be so overwhelming.
⭑*•̩̩͙⊱✩•̩̩͙⊰•*⭑
Your phone chimed a while later with a text from Rafe saying 'I'm here. Please let me in so we can talk.’
With a sigh you begrudgingly made your way downstairs and to the front door. When you opened it Rafe was standing there with a tired yet worried look on his face.
"Can I please-"
You put a finger up to your lips. "Shh. You'll wake up my parents." You let him inside and signaled him to follow you into your room. Before you can close the door fully, Rafe starts asking questions. "Why do you think I cheated on you? What video are you talking about?"
"Rafe, I saw a video of you sucking face with Sofia at Kelce's party. Did you fuck her too? Is that why you didn't text me all day?"
Rafe was looking at you like you'd grown two heads. "I am so fucking lost right now. I don't even think I saw Sofia at the party!"
You pull up the video and show it to Rafe. He watches it a few times before sitting on your bed with a sigh, dragging his hands over his face. You watch him with your arms crossed, waiting to see what he'll say. Rafe then pulls his phone out of his pocket, pulling something up.
"Look, this is a picture taken the day of the party." He shows you a random photo that was taken of him and Kelce, also displaying the date on it.
"So what?"
Rafe grabs your phone going back to the video and zooming in on the spot where he is seen kissing Sofia. "My outfit isn't the same in the video. It's an old video from when we were together."
Looking at both the phones you realize that he's right. "Oh... well why would Topper send me this if it's old?" You question out loud
"Wait a minute, Topper sent you this?"
"Yeah he texted me earlier saying we needed to talk but I told him I was on the mainland." You show Rafe the texts from Topper and he's seething.
"I could kill that son of bitch!" He shouted, and you had to cover his mouth, reminding him your parents were asleep. You sat on the bed looking at him, now you were the one who was confused so you decided to flat-out ask him what was going on.
"When you weren't talking to me I had told Kelce and Topper what was going on and he was the one who convinced me you didn't wanna be with me anymore. You were ignoring my calls and everything so he said I should just forget about you and not make things worse." Suddenly Rafe was on his knees with his hands on your hips.
"Baby listen, I know that I can be a major fuck up sometimes and that I don't have the best way of dealing with stress and everything but I would never cheat on you. I'm sorry about y'know, the coke and your birthday and everything else that I've ever done wrong, but I hope you realize that I love you so fucking much. You mean the world to me, and I don't wanna lose you." You stared at him with wide eyes as tears started to fall down his cheeks and brought up your hand to gently wipe them away. "So if you still want space, I'll give it to you. But I know I'm ready to change and make everything up to you."
You leaned down to place a soft kiss on his lips. You definitely weren't expecting him to pour everything out like that. "I love you too, and I don't want you to think I'm ever judging you or being a hardass. I just worry about you. If something ever happened to you..." you sighed, not wanting to finish the sentence.
"I promise not to make you worry." Rafe stood up and kissed you hard while cradling your face. He tried to leave to give you space, but you insisted he'd stay and said you'd head back to the OBX tomorrow. Rafe wanted to talk to Topper in person, which you didn't see going well, but you'd worry about it tomorrow.
You gave him plenty of blankets and pillows since he didn't want to take up so much space in your twin bed and chose to sleep on the floor. Once you'd gotten under your blankets, sleep whisked you away. 
Rafe, on the other hand, could barely get his mind to calm down. He was fucking enraged with Topper for trying to pull some bullshit like that. Rafe should've known he was a snake. He noticed the way Topper's eyes would linger on you or how his hugs went on for a little too long. But Rafe didn't think Topper was stupid enough to try and break you two up.
Now that he had finally cleared everything up with you, he wasn't worried. Rafe was going to take care of Topper as soon as he got back to OBX. He'll make sure to get the point across that nobody fucks with his girl and his relationship.
part 4
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certaimromance · 1 month ago
Text
ꫂ ၴႅၴ Effects of the Curse.
Aaron Hotchner x Fem!reader
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Summary: After receiving some outside comments, the topic of marriage comes up. Unfortunately, you and Aaron have different views on the matter.
Words: 2,7k.
TW: mention to marriage, divorce and haley. angst without happy ending. established relationship. about a year after hotch's departure from the fbi. english isn't my first language (sorry for my mistakes, be kind please).
Note: As a person who wants to get married, this is pretty personal lol.
Call me crazy, but I truly believe that Hotch would not remarry after Haley for fear of repeating history (he is very the prophecy vibes for me).
♡ Enjoy! ♡
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You were leaning against one of the kitchen counters as you waited for the water you had put in the kettle to heat up and allow you to brew coffee. Behind you, you could hear your boyfriend rummaging through the cupboard for your favorite mug and carefully placing it next to his, going through the same routine the two of you had already established.
But something was feeling different this time.
It had more to do with your memories of the family dinner you'd gone to the day before, where there hadn't been a single person who hadn't asked when you were going to officially become Mrs. Hotchner, when you were going to take that big step down the aisle, and maybe even expand the family beyond that. It was a little silly for you to think so much about it, because those were the typical comments people made when they saw a functioning couple, and it had happened to you before with ex-boyfriends you took home, but this time it felt more serious.
Maybe it was because of how your heart was racing as you imagined wearing a ring that would show your total commitment to love someone to death, or maybe it was how Aaron reacted, or rather his lack of reaction, and how much that bothered you.
The sunlight streaming in through the kitchen window and filtering through the trees in the yard had you so mesmerized at that moment that you barely felt when his arms wrapped around your waist and pulled you closer to him. You were so caught up in your thoughts that you let out a slight sound of surprise and relaxed a little under his touch.
“What is on your mind? Perhaps the new coffee maker we should definitely consider purchasing?” He asked with a cheerful tone.
Yes, you two definitely had to buy a new one after the old one suddenly stopped working. But that wasn't what you were thinking about. You were a long way from that.
“Sure, we should do that.” Your answer was blurted out almost out of obligation and came out robotically.
He wasn't stupid, nor had he lost the habits of a profiler after so many years as one. He knew you well enough to know that something was troubling you, even if he didn't know exactly why. He pulled you a little closer and planted a small kiss on the top of your head, tightening his grip on your waist a little more to comfort you as he spoke.
“Darling.” He murmured softly, wanting you to give him your full attention. “I can practically see the gears turning in your head, what's wrong with you?”
You, were what you wanted to say.
“Nothing, just...it's been a long day.” That was all that came out of your mouth.
To tell the truth, it had been an exhausting day, and at least you hadn't lied that much. You had been very restless, trying to do many things to keep the destructive thoughts out of your mind, and it had made you quite tired.
“Don't try to fool me. I know you well enough to know when you are lying.” He gently pinched the sides of your waist and turned you to look into his eyes.
“I...I was just thinking about some things my family said yesterday.” You finally confessed, your voice a little shaky, as if telling him would embarrass you.
“Like what?” He furrowed his brow in concern, brushing a hand against your cheek in that way that always made you feel a bit weak in the knees.
His touch was so warm and loving against your skin, and for a moment, it almost made you forget what you were thinking about. Almost.
“Just a few things about how I haven't married you yet, and...” You didn't even want to finish the sentence, feeling your heart beat a little faster as the words got stuck in your throat. “That we don't have, you know, kids.”
Aaron took a quick look at your face as he heard your confession. His heart clenched a little as he realized what you were talking about, and he couldn't help but be curious about it. The topic of marriage and having children hadn't come up much since you started dating because he already had Jack and had been married once. It was a goal he'd already achieved. However, he knew it was a topic that needed to be discussed, as he saw your worried expression and slightly trembling voice.
He put his hands on your shoulders, giving them a gentle massage to relieve the tension. He didn't want to seem careless or unconcerned, so he spoke after pausing.
“And you were worried because...?”
He looked at you with a kind of intense gaze that made you feel like your heart was going to burst out of your chest at any moment. As he massaged your shoulders, you took a deep breath, trying to calm yourself.
“Well, from the way you reacted, I guess.” You admitted, your voice full of doubt. “I mean, I know we haven't really talked about it, but...it's hard to know what you're thinking when the subject comes up and you have that cold expression on your face, like it's nothing relevant.”
His expression softened, and he brought his hands to your face, cupping your cheeks to make sure you were looking directly at him.
“You know very well that I have already taken care of that.” He said softly, trying to find the best words. “Marriage, children...I had that. I have Jack. And he's enough for me.”
Enough for him. Were you too?
His words had a surprising effect on you, leaving you with a somewhat bitter taste in your mouth. Despite this, you maintained a calm exterior, striving to conceal your true feelings.
“And what about what's enough for me?” You inquired, addressing the issue with a candor you had previously avoided. The words emerged from your mouth almost involuntarily.
Hotchner was taken aback by your question. The way you asked it gave the impression that you were accusing him, although he was unsure if this was the intention. He took a deep breath, searching for the most tactful way to respond to your words.
“I...I didn't realize.” He began, pausing for a moment to collect his thoughts. “You never mentioned that you wanted to get married or have children. I thought you were happy with our current situation.”
“Not really.” You admitted, avoiding eye contact as you looked down at the floor. “I mean, I really love Jack, he's a wonderful boy.”
Aaron listened intently as you continued, your words coming out hesitantly.
“And being with you...it makes me so happy.” You sighed and leaned back against the kitchen counter. “But…I feel like I need more. I want more, and I'm not necessarily talking about a child. I want to know that you belong to me as much as I belong to you.”
Aaron walked over and stood in front of you, placing his hands on your hips. He stared at you as he spoke, his voice soft but firm.
“Darling, my love...I belong to you, and you belong to me, and you don't need a ring to know that. If you want one, I'll buy it for you, that or whatever you want.”
You let out a small sigh and leaned closer to him, resting your head on his chest. You could hear the steady beat of his heart as he held you tightly and his body enveloped you in a warm embrace.
“I know.” You said quietly, the words somewhat muffled against his shirt. “But it's not just about the ring. It's about the commitment, the symbol of our union...and how that gives me security.”
He ran his fingers through your hair gently as he listened, his touch soothing against your scalp.
“Listen to me.” He began, his tone affectionate. “I've always been committed to you. From the moment I allowed myself to open up to you to the first night we spent together, and every day since. You know it. Does it really take a ceremony to make you believe it?”
When you looked at him, you felt a rush of emotions. You knew he loved you, and he was right. He had shown you his commitment many times. You had even been living together for a couple of years. But there was still a part of you that longed for that tangible symbol of love.
“I don't doubt you.” You said, choosing your words carefully. “But it's about symbolism. Having physical proof of our commitment shows the world how firmly bound we are to each other. And I know you believe in it. You were married once for a reason.”
Oh, that's a sensitive topic.
He let out a small sigh when you mentioned his previous marriage, and his fingers stopped stroking your hair. It was an uncomfortable and painful subject he didn't like to talk about, especially with you. The memories of his failed marriage were difficult to process, not only because of Haley's death but also because of the many problems that had plagued their relationship before its sad end.
“Maybe I believed that before, or at least I thought I did.” He replied after a short pause. “But that doesn't mean I want to go through it all again.”
“Even with me?” You asked softly, lifting your head to look into his eyes. There was a hint of vulnerability and sadness in your expression, your heart trembling slightly in anticipation of his answer. “Even in the future?”
Aaron observed your expression and the slight shift in your demeanor. He was aware of the impact his words could have on you, and he took care to choose them carefully. He gently traced your features with the back of his hand, his thumb gently moving across your face.
“This isn't about you or time at all.” He said in a soft voice, trying to express his love for you. “I just couldn't go through that again. The expectations, the disappointment, the divorce. It's too much.”
As he spoke, he paused and closed his eyes for a moment, trying to contain his emotions. His previous marriage had left him deeply scarred, and the thought of suffering the same fate again, especially with you, filled him with dread. He silently prayed every day that history would never repeat itself.
But your situation was quite different. The concerns he expressed, which he did not fully explain, only served to increase your doubts. You were aware that Aaron had every reason to be fearful after experiencing so much in the past, but you were surprised that he seemed to be afraid to be with you in front of the law.
How could he be so sure that a marriage with you would end in divorce? If his demanding job could no longer be the cause of the failure, could it perhaps be something else? Could it be you?
“You're not the same as before, and I'm not-” You started to say when you were interrupted by a loud whistle.
The unexpected sound of the kettle whistling gently interrupts the moment between the two, if only for a brief moment, allowing you both to take a breath.
He carefully put out the fire and poured the steaming water into the cups he had thoughtfully prepared earlier. He then added a teaspoon of sugar to each and a little milk to yours, taking care to ensure it was just the way you liked it. As you both watched the hot liquid swirl in the cups, he let out a sigh. Aaron felt a sense of responsibility, knowing he wasn't able to deliver what you desired.
Hotchner handed you your cup with care, ensuring that he did not accidentally burn himself in the process. The kitchen fell silent as he stood next to you while you both sipped your coffee, lost in your own thoughts.
The taste of coffee with a little milk on your tongue distracted you from the heavy atmosphere that had settled between you and him in the kitchen. In that moment, you took the opportunity to watch him closely and try to decipher what he was thinking. Maybe use a little of what you had learned from being with a profiler for so long.
His face was set, and you could easily see the emotion in his eyes. He was not happy with the conversation, and his expression had given him away from the first crossword on the subject.
When Aaron noticed you staring at him in the midst of his silence, he looked up into your eyes and held them for a few seconds. He knew exactly what you were trying to do, but it didn't bother him. Being a profiler, he found it ironic, and a small smile appeared on his lips.
“You can look at me all you want.” He said with a dry laugh. “And try to profile me if you want.”
“It's not that...” You began to say, but you knew he was right. That was precisely what you were attempting to do, trying to discern his feelings, even utilizing some profiling techniques he had taught you himself. You let out a small sigh, feeling a little foolish for your lack of subtlety.
Of course he'd realize. The man could leave the FBI, but the FBI couldn't leave the man.
“I find it challenging not to.” You confessed, tilting your head and taking a sip of your coffee. “I've picked up on some of your habits, I suppose.”
He let out a soft chuckle, acknowledging that you were trying to get a read on him and feeling relieved to see the earlier tension ease. He lifted the cup to his lips and took a small sip, letting the hot liquid warm his insides before speaking in a friendly tone.
“And what have I taught you?” He asked, raising an eyebrow curiously.
“A few things.” You replied, with a hint of sarcasm. “Like how to spot lies, read body language, and how to read people well. Basically, all the skills required to be a profiler, except how to not profile your loved one.”
“I see your point.” He replied, a soft smile on his face, grateful that things between you were feeling good again. “Perhaps I should have taught you that last part too, but you would have made a good profiler.”
“I would have made a good wife too.” The comment came out before you could stop yourself, and you immediately covered your mouth with your fingers after saying it.
Aaron's smile faded as soon as you spoke, and the tension in the room intensified. He exhaled, a combination of fatigue and frustration, and placed the half-finished coffee on the counter behind you before crossing his arms in front of his chest.
“I'm sorry.” You spoke up before he could even open his mouth, hoping to get a word in first.
“Don't.” His answer came almost automatically.
It was then that you grabbed your cell phone after hearing it vibrate, hoping to avoid the situation. “It's the seamstress. Jack's costume is ready.”
He nodded silently as you picked up the cell phone from the kitchen table. The comment was still in the air, and you sensed that he had heard it, but he didn't react at all. Instead, he seemed relieved that the awkward moment between the two was over, if only temporarily.
Thank you, Halloween.
After a brief pause, Aaron inquired gently. “Would you like me to accompany you to collect it?”
“I believe it would be best if I went alone.” You replied after a moment. “I need to take some time to process things, and you need to wait for your son. He will be out of school soon.”
Aaron felt a slight discomfort in his chest at your words. He recognized the truth in what you said, that some time apart might be beneficial for both of you to reflect on the conversation and all that was left unsaid.
And after that, you proceeded to retrieve your keys and walked through the door without so much as a moment's hesitation. This time, there wasn't even an ‘I love you’ or a goodbye kiss as a reminder that all was well. This time, the silence conveyed a message that was perhaps more profound than any gesture or sweet word.
In the end, the marriage was scarier than any Halloween costume.
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cosmal · 2 years ago
Note
✪ — sender  is  found  drunk  by  receiver, ❛ i just wanted to make sure you’re okay. ❜
tequila makes me sleepy
summary — pete comes to find you at a party after you call him.
content — tasm!peter parker x fem!afab!reader, drunk!reader, metnions of gross guys sexualizing reader
Peter doesn't have his mask on. He's been swinging about Queens trying to find the party you're at and he hasn't thought about how he's recognisable the entire time.
He thinks about how tired you'd sounded on the phone. How you'd begged him to stay on the phone so you wouldn't fall asleep. Thinking about it more makes him panicky, but he can't help it.
"Tequila makes me sleepy, Parker."
"Yeah? Where are you, honey?"
"Some party. Stay on the phone? Don't wanna fall asleep."
Eventually, he finds the party. In the back of his dizzy mind, he remembers you mentioning it on Tuesday when you were over at his apartment. He remembers how excited you were about it and how upset you were because he wasn't coming.
He lands in the alley beside the building and wastes no time in pushing through the front door. He stands in the front entranceway and starts to get frustrated. Most of the time, he hates his enhanced senses. Even more so right now because he can't hear you.
He blames it on the crowd. There are way too many people here for him to be focusing on just one. But it's you. He knows more about you than he does himself and he can't fucking hear you. He hopes that he's too overwhelmed. The reason why he can't hear you. Not because you've left and you're somewhere, drunk and unsafe, where he can't find you.
"Hey," he grabs the arm of some drunk guy, "where's the bedroom?"
Pointing down to the left with a wobbly arm, "Down that hall," he slurs.
Peter doesn't say thank you. He drops his arm and heads In that direction. Avoiding PDA and more rowdy drunk guys.
The relief he feels when he pushes open the door only lasts a few moments. He finds you, on your stomach with your face smooshed against your arm, asleep. Your sparkly dress rides up your legs to reveal enough bare skin to make Peter feel uncomfortable. He's grateful he's here right now.
The mattress dips down where he sits down by your head, and can't help himself from pushing your messy hair from your face.
Your lips parted, you wrinkle up your face when you start to rouse. Peter is selfish with his hands, squeezing at the fat of your shoulder, running a knuckle down your soft cheek. Slowly, you come to, blinking away your fatigue. Peter, and he's super sorry for it, thinks you're adorable.
"Hello," he says softly. He doesn't know why, but he feels guilty for waking you.
"Peter," you say, lips sticking together with blotchy gloss, "Pete, hey." This time when you say it, it's just understandable. He appreciates the fond hum to your words nonetheless.
"Hey," he says and pushes his thumb into your cheek. You groan because he's a nuisance but he doesn't care because you're okay.
You sit up on your elbows and he can tell you're trying not to wobble. He wants to stable you but doesn't know how to in your position. You seem as dizzy as he'd expect because you always are when drunk. You have the scars on your knees to prove it.
"What are you doing here?" you mumble, scratching at your face with a flippancy he hates.
He catches your hand and rubs your face for you. Gently, because he's not mean, he smooths the back of his hand down your cheek and pushes his fingers over your eyebrow and into your hair.
"Just wanted to make sure you were okay," he tells you. "You sounded bad on the phone, honey."
"Shit, I'm," you hiccup and he panics for a moment. "Shit I'm sorry, Pete, I didn't mean to scare you."
"It's okay," he says honestly. You did scare him but it's okay now because it was reasonable. And you're okay.
You sit up and swing your legs over the edge of the bed and he stables you with a hand on the bottom of your back. Pulling your dress down your legs, he frowns when you shiver.
"You cold?" he worries.
Nodding, you clearly regret it with a groan. "A little. This dress is horrible."
"You think?"
"Yeah, it's itchy and-" you're hiccuping some more and he hopes you don't make yourself sick, "it's too small. The guys here- they, they're gross."
Peter goes rigid. "They didn't do anything did they?"
You shake your head and there's a timidness to you that Pete wants to capture and keep forever. You, an image, rumpled clothes and droopy eyes. Despite how worried he'd been only ten minutes ago, he thinks you're amazing. It's terrifying, honestly.
"No, they just look at me..." you trail off and look at the wall over Peter's shoulder quickly, "They look at me like I'm a piece of meat."
Peter doesn't know what to say. He feels queasy.
"Well, they don't look at me like you are right now."
"Like what?" he lets his tongue catch up to his head.
"I don't know." You shrug and look at your lap.
Peter can't help himself. "I hope they don't look at you like I do. Like you're the prettiest girl in the room. If they do, they need to find someone else."
You let your head fall against his shoulder. "Pete..."
"It's true."
"They don't." He can hear your smile.
"They don't?" Peter now sounds half-offended. "Who else are they looking at like that? You're the prettiest girl in the room."
You have the decency in you to scoff. "You're unbelievable."
"I know," he says when you yawn. "I know. C'mon let's get you home."
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hyunniesgirl · 10 months ago
Text
Another Love | Part 5
Summary: you've been hopelessly in love with Han since you were children. One night you confess your feelings to him.
Warnings for this chapter: the tiniest bit of angst
Words count: ±5,600
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6
A/N: I struggled so much with writer's block + personal life issues to write this part, I'm glad it's finally out. Next part will be the last one for another love.
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The first thing you think after waking up is that it was all a dream. Of course it was, there's no way Jisung likes you in that way.
After ten minutes sitting on your bed, staring at the wall, you come to the conclusion that it couldn't have been a dream, it was too realistic.
Then, you come to accept that he was drunk, there's no other reasonable possibility and that makes perfectly sense for you, he didn't mean what he said because he was intoxicated.
So after taking your sweet time getting ready for class, trying to avoid Jisung, you go out to the kitchen planning to pretend that last night's events never happened.
You didn't expect to find your best friend, wide awake, preparing coffee. Han doesn't really like waking up too early in the morning so it comes as a surprise when he's perfectly awake. He glances at you, pouring a coffee into a mug and handing it to you after wishing you a good morning.
Jisung looks tired, huge eye bags under his eyes. It looks like he didn't sleep at all.
His eyes trail carefully, analyzing your complexion, trying to guess what's your mood after his confession.
“About last night…” He starts saying, seeing your eyes dart from the dark liquid to his face.
“Don't worry about it”, you try sounding relaxed. So he remembers it, that makes you nervous. “I guessed that you were drunk and didn't mean what you said”, you shrug.
Han frowns, tilting his head to the side while staring at you.
“I was not drunk”, he says, “I meant everything I said”, he clears his throat nervously, “and I know it's too late, I don't want things to get weird again”
You feel your face warming up, you didn't expect him to tell you this kind of thing so straightforwardly. But above all else, you're mad. Mad because you went through so much to get over him, just for him to come back months later saying he likes you back? You're not having it.
“Do you think it's okay to play with people's feelings?” You put the mug on the table, crossing your arms. “You didn't give me any hope, Jisung, not a glimpse. You told me you never saw me in that way and it was pretty clear to me that you would never like me in a romantic way. So why now?”
He gulps, trying to find an answer for a question he has been asking himself since he noticed his new found feelings for you.
“I thought it would be selfish of me to give you hope at that time. I really didn't see you in that way, I don't know what changed”, he bites his bottom lip, feeling like he's ruining everything again.
“And you're not being selfish now?” You scoff, your words feel like daggers being thrown at him.
“I don't want to be”, he tells you, frowning in confusion.
“I guess it's not always the thought that counts”, you say, grabbing your bag from the couch and walking out of the door, wishing you didn't have to come back.
You're angry with Jisung for even thinking about changing his mind, but more than anything else you're angry with yourself because you felt your heart waver for a moment.
It's not easy to hear that he loves you, you have waited to hear that for so long it actually doesn't seem to be real. Sometimes you just long for something you know will never come and Jisung's love was just that, something you thought could never be yours.
You don't even know how to process it, you are not even over your relationship with Jeongho yet, you don't even know if you still like Jisung in that way. You're just confused, you should be grieving the relationship you didn't get to have and not worrying about your feelings for your best friend again.
You're just tired of all this, you wish you could just have a normal friendship with Jisung and not this mess. But that's on you, you're the one that loved him first and confessed to him, so this is just you dealing with the consequences of your own actions.
Since the moment Jisung realized he's in love with you, he's been trying to understand why now? You didn't change at all, you're still the same kind and smart girl you have always been, so why did he only fall in love with you now? After everything you went through to get over him.
He didn't really plan to tell you about his feelings, he thought that maybe it would be for the best if he kept those to himself so you could move on completely. But the thought of letting you think you were doing something wrong just broke his heart, you shouldn't think you're in the wrong when he's clearly at fault.
“Well, it could have been worse”, Chan says, smiling sympathetically to Jisung while they work on a new track.
“Worse how? She hates me now”, Jisung whines.
“It's better that she hates you for telling the truth, than her thinking she was ruining your friendship” Chan shrugs, looking back at his laptop.
“How many times can someone ruin a friendship, though?” Changbin asks, with a finger in hid chin, thinking out loud. “Are you two trying to compete or something?”
Jisung stares at Changbin for a moment, taking a deep breath, he shouldn't yell at his friend.
“Do you think you'll be able to see her moving on while you like her?” Chan asks, biting his bottom lip. “It was not easy for y/n to see you dating different people, but she's very strong. What about you?”
“I- I don't know”, Jisung answers, fidgeting with his fingers, “I'd like to have another chance, but I know it's not possible. I just want her to be happy even if it's not with me”
“Then, that's what you should do”, Chan shrugs. “Y/N is going through a hard time right now, you should just support her until her heart is fully healed and maybe, just maybe, one day you'll get another opportunity”
Jisung nods, feeling his heart sinking. It's his time now to pin over an unrequited love.
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“He what?” Hannah's voice comes out in a half scream, making the people around look at you two.
“You heard me”, you say, trying to hide yourself from the prying eyes.
“Well, he clearly has no tact”, Hannah points out. “So… hm… what did you tell him?”
“I told him that he shouldn't play with people feelings”
“But, how did you feel hearing his confession?” She asks, curiously.
“I don't know”, you sigh, “I swayed for a moment if that's what you want to know”, you play with the napkins on the table, trying not to look at Hannah because you know she's going to see right through you.
“Are you sure it was just for a moment?” She asks, looking at you sympathetically. You feel tears brimming through your eyes. “You still love him, don't you?” She asks even though she already knows your answer.
You nod, feeling a few tears running down your cheeks. It's been three days since Jisung confessed and all you could think about was him. You tried so hard to focus on other things, to think about how much he hurt you so many times, but everything just came down to how your heart couldn't stop beating so fast every time you remember him saying he's in love with you.
It's embarrassing to be crying in the middle of a restaurant, luckily it's night so the lack of lightning helps hide your red eyes.
“But I don't think I want to”, you tell Hannah, “I don't want to love him, not after all the effort I put to forget about these feelings”, you confess. Logically, you want to ignore all the reactions Jisung causes on you, you want to pretend you don't feel a single thing for him anymore.
“I don't think you'll be able to let go of these feelings if you keep being friends with him”, Hannah sighs, she really didn't want to be the person to tell you to end a 15 years long friendship, but if you really want to get over him, you're going to have to cut him off. “It was possible when he didn't like you back, but now there is this hope inside you and I just know that you'll keep holding on to it involuntarily”
“What should I do, then? Jisung is everything I ever know, I'm not sure if I'll be able to just end our friendship like that”
“Look, y/n. You have two options: end it now and move on, or you can consider accepting his feeling”, Hannah frowns, “I know it's hard, but I think it's something you have to take your time to think about”
You get back home, exhausted from the emotional turmoil. At least this whole situation took your mind out of Jeongho, you were able to go through another whole day without looking at your phone, waiting for him to contact you again. Maybe you're coming to terms with the fact that your relationship is really over.
As soon as you finish showering, you grab some ice cream from the fridge, put on some sad drama to play on TV and get cozy with a blanket on the sofa. Crying is all you wanted to do in these few weeks, having your heart broken twice in a year is no joke.
Half way through the movie you hear the sound of the door being opened. You have tears in your eyes because the story of the movie is just so sad, you didn't want Jisung to see you crying in the middle of the living room but it's inevitable.
He doesn't say anything though, walking slowly closer to you with a paper bag in his hands and pouring snacks all over the center table, opening a box of tissues and giving it to you.
“Oh, I watched this movie. It's pretty sad, right?” He asks, eyes locked on the screen.
“Yeah”, you say, whipping your tears.
Jisung gets comfortable on the sofa, crossing his arms and just stays there, watching the movie with you.
No words being said the whole time you were together, just your sniffs and the sounds from the movie being heard in the dark living room of your shared apartment. As if none of you had ever confessed being in love with one another.
Jisung thought maybe he should try and make things the same as they were before, he wants to give you the feeling of comfort you felt close to him before. Even if it hurts him, he'll try.
You fell asleep on the sofa, but woke up in your room, Jisung must have carried you there. When you finish getting ready for class, there's no one else at home and there's only a note on the table saying that Han will bring dinner later.
You thought he would bring up his confession again last night, but he just stayed with you, commenting on the movie the way you always do. It was… comfortable and you can't say you didn't like it.
You have a full schedule of tutoring today, you don't even know if you'll have time to breathe. So you take the first bus to school, stopping at the cafe to get some coffee for you and Hannah.
It's been a while since you saw Heeseung, other than seeing him in the cafe, he's taking the same class as you this semester so you eventually run into him and after a while it just stopped being awkward.
It's startling to think that you're almost graduating, it seems like it was only yesterday when you moved in with Jisung to attend university. You had so many plans, hoping that everything would go well and you'd end up dating your best friend and living your best life.
Things never go as we plan it, that's a good lesson you learned after all these years. In the end, you got Jisung to like you back, but do you still want him?
With all this turmoil of events, you almost forget that you and Jisung have to go back home to see your families, when finals start you won't have time and neither will Han with the group's new album coming out.
Things are weird between the two of you, not as normal as before you confessed but not as awful as when you were apart from each other. Even though Jisung is trying to act normal, like he never confessed to you, there's still this strange sensation that everything is out of place. Maybe it's just a matter of you two adapting to this new dynamic you have going on.
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As always, your mom and Jisung's prepare so much food for you to eat and take home too. They keep glancing suspiciously at you two the whole dinner, whispering between each other like no one's noticing how they're behaving. So the next morning when you go out with yours and Jisung's dad to buy groceries, the two ladies atack your best friend with questions.
“Did you two fight?”, your mother asks.
“You two have been so weird since the last time you came to visit”, Jisung's mom completes, “but now you can't even look at each other”
“We didn't fight”, Jisung clears his throat, looking around, making his mom sigh.
“I can see right through you”, she scolds, “you should apologize to her and ask that she forgets what you did”
“It's not something I want her to forget”, he mumbles, sulking.
“What exactly did you do?” Your mom asks, frowning.
Jisung gulps, trying to spit those difficult words out of his mouth.
“I confessed that I'm in love with her”, he mumbles, waiting for them to scold him for that but their reaction was the opposite.
“What took you so long?” His mom sighs.
He looks at them curiously but proceeds to tell them the whole story since the moment you confessed to him.
Jisung has been racking his brain for weeks now, trying to understand just how things got where they are now and the only conclusion he got is that he is the one who changed.
After looking at a future where you were nowhere to be found, Jisung realized that a life without you doesn't make any sense to him. Food lost its taste, activities didn't bring him any pleasure, coming home didn't feel the same.
Why would he want to come home to a house where you were not there? A place where you wouldn't have dinner with him and talk about your day, watch something and make little comments about the nonsensical things happening on the screen or funny curiosities about what you were watching. Jisung realized he didn't want to do those things with anyone but you, he wanted to hear you laughing of his jokes, he wanted to see you looking at him with a judgemental glare when he said something stupid, he wanted to wake up and look at your face for the rest of his life, it had to be you, it couldn't be anyone else.
It's just sad that he only realized that when it was too late.
“She rejected you?”, his mom asks and Jisung nods, biting his bottom lip.
“You're not going to give up now, right? Because of one rejection!”, your mom tells him. “We had to watch y/n’s eyes always on you for years, she didn't give up that easily so I won't accept it if you just give up on my daughter like that”, she huffs.
“What am I to do? I'm afraid I'll ruin our friendship”, he cries out.
“Don't you think she had that same fear when she confessed to you?” Jisung's mother says. “There are things in life that are worth the risk”
“You know, if you're sure you won't regret it even if the result is not what you expected, you should keep trying”, your mom says, “from what you just told us, you didn't ask her for a chance. You can't give up before asking for a chance”
He looks from your mom to his, sighing. Should he? Should he try to win you back?
The door opens and your voice is heard from the entrance, making the three of them shut up and pretend like they weren't just talking about you.
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Your schedule got full again with tutoring since you're going to stop it while you're going through your finals. The parents want you to speed things up so their children don't fall behind while you're away. That means less free time to think about your messy love life and honestly that's for the best because you're more confused than ever. So you spend most of your time at school or in your students houses, going back home late at night and going out early in the day.
Jisung misses seeing your face, when he arrives at night you're already asleep and when he wakes in the morning you're already gone. He knows it's for the best, that way you can take your time to get used to the way things are between you two now. He also needs this time to decide if he really wants to risk your friendship by asking you for a chance or if it's better for him to try and get over these feelings, however, he can't help but long for you.
Jisung knows just how hectic the last week has been with you coming home just to sleep, trying to keep up with studying and tutoring. So he asks for Minho's help to cook your favorite dish, your mom sent him the receipt saying she always cooked it for you when you were studying for the college's exam.
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After another exhausting day you arrive home, just wanting a warm bath and your bed. However, the moment you step into the house, you feel the nice familiar smell of food, making your stomach growl.
“Hey”, Han glances at you before going back to setting the table.
“Why does this smell so good?” You ask, dropping your bag on the sofa and coming closer to the table to look at whatever food has this smell.
“I was going to bring dinner but decided to cook”, he shrugs.
“Hm? How is the kitchen still intact?” You joke and he glares at you.
“Minho might or might not have been here overseeing the process so I wouldn't set the apartment on fire”, he pouts.
You nod, walking to the sink to wash your hands.
“Why didn't you invite him to have dinner with us?”, you ask.
“I did but he didn't want to stay”, he shrugs. “I think he's going to visit his cats tonight”
Well, the cats come first place to Minho, you're already used to that. So you just nod, watching Jisung finish putting the things in place while you sit down.
“How was your day?” He asks.
“Exhausting”, you say with a sigh. You have big eye bags under your eyes.
“Are you sleeping well?”
“Yeah, it's just a lot going on”, you answer truthfully.
You should have stopped tutoring some time ago, but you kept pushing it so you could have something to keep you occupied away from your break up with Jeongho and a bit to escape from the dilemma in your mind about your feelings for Jisung.
“You know”, he says slowly, trying to find the best words, “I don't want you to feel pressured by my feelings, you can even forget what I said if it's best for you”
He didn't really want you to forget, but the last thing Jisung wants is for you to feel more exhausted because of him.
“I don't know if I want to forget”, you mumble, not really thinking before speaking.
“What? What do you mean?” Jisung asks, his heartbeat getting faster, hope growing in his chest.
“I just- I don't know”, you play with your food, not wanting to look at him. “I don't know if I still like you in that way but I'm not sure if I don't like you at all anymore”, you confess.
“Wait- I”, he feels his stomach sinking in. He doesn't know what to say, this is not the time to ask you to consider giving him another chance, right? You're confused right now, he shouldn't pressure you, so he bottles everything in, struggling but restraining his feelings. “Take your time, I won't go anywhere”, he says confidently, even though he's not actually that confident.
Jisung's not sure if having hope is the right thing for his heart, he's not strong like you and knows that the moment you reject him definitely he'll fall apart. Maybe that's why he's been so afraid of asking you to give him a chance.
You nod, lost in thoughts. Maybe it would be better if he pressured you, then you would be forced to make a decision and get out of this bind you're in right now.
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Hannah started trying to convince you to go to a party. Why does she always try to drag you to a party every time you're having problems in your love life? You are afraid not even her knows the answer for that, guess that that's what friends are for.
“It's after exams, you'll need to relax”, she points out, “it's going to be good to have some fun after worrying so much about the finals”
“I just want to sleep for a whole day”, you whine, “that's how I want to relax after the exams”
You're not even sure how you found the time to meet with her, you're both between classes and she's really using your ten minute break for this.
“You need to get out there, meet new people”, she says, receiving a mean glare from you. “Not like that”, Hannah pouts, “I mean meeting new people in general, not to date”
“Well, I think I already know enough people”, you say and she sighs, crossing her arms while sulking.
“Please, it's your last party in college”, she points out, “we need to celebrate”
You take a deep breath.
“It's not my last party if I bomb on my exams”, you tell her, watching her roll her eyes and scoff.
“You're like the only person in this school who has zero chance of bombing an exam”, she says, pushing you lightly, while giving you puppy eyes. “Can we please go to the party? After we graduate we won't have time to meet each other as much and I'm going to miss you so much I might die”
You roll your eyes, chuckling.
“Why are you so dramatic?” You sigh, “okay, fine. We can go”, you give in.
“Great! Now let’s go, I'm sure we are late”, she says, making you panic looking at your watch, you could kill her right now if you were not about to miss your exam.
Han arrives and for the first time in a while you're awake, Hannah's there with you so that explains why you're still up. He greets you two, going to the kitchen to grab a bottle of water.
“Hey, do you want ice cream?” You ask him, pointing at the big bowl of ice cream you have in your lap.
“No, thank you”, he says, awkwardly. He missed your face so much that he takes a few more seconds to come to his senses.
“Have you heard about Ryujin's party?” Hannah asks, “I know she's friends with Hyunjin.
“I didn't”, Jisung answers, eyeing you.
“We are planning to go”, Hannah says, pretending to be clueless to his longing eyes on you.
“That's cool”, he clears his throat, “I can pick you up after the party”
“Really? That would be cool”, Hannah nods, her attention going back to you when you let out a big sigh.
“Well, I had plans for whren I finish my exams”, you sigh, “I was going to watch a list of horror movies while stuffing my face with the most unhealthy foods I can find”, you point out.
“Too bad”, Hannah mocks, chuckling at your confused face. “You already told me you are going so no take backs”
“Do I have to dress up?”, you huff, in defeat and your best friend rolls her eyes, starting to talk about all the clothes she bought that would look good on you.
Meanwhile, Jisung leans on the kitchen counter, wishing that no one notices him there so he can look at you for a minute more.
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You think you did well on your exams, each test you finished gave you a sense of relief, finally you would be out of college in a few weeks. However, that also brought you new doubts, what would you do now? You'll have to find a job and it's already time for you and Jisung to resolve the matter with your friendship, you have to decide what you're going to do.
If you decide to not give him another chance, you are going to need to move out of the apartment, that's for certain. Even if you want to move on, you can't while living with him. But if you decide to give him a chance, what then? What changes in your relationship? You never really thought about how things would work out if Jisung ever liked you back. You never even entertained the idea of having sex with him, you knew that once you let those thoughts get to you, you would be done for so you avoided them, but now those things you thought were impossible, are becoming too real and those thoughts are trying to sneak in on your mind.
Jisung is giving you space, he spends time with you but the air is almost always awkward, like he has something to say but won't spit it out.
Now that you're free from studying the whole day, you have more free time and that leads to you thinking about Jisung all the time.
The party is boring, you want to go home. You met Heeseung there with his friends and for the first time in what looks like a decade, Hannah is interested in someone so you encourage her to go do her thing and flirt with the person. She doesn't want to leave you at first but you insist and she finally goes to the dance floor, leaving you to mop silently in a corner of the room.
Heeseung and his friends keep you company and take care of you while you down your drinks, you want to relax after so much you have been going through. You just didn't expect to get dizzy and sick so easily and when you realize you're in Jisung's car, being taken home.
“Where's Hannah?” You ask, startling Jisung.
"Hyunjin is at the party, he's going to take her home later”, he answers, paying attention back to the road.
“Who told you to come?” You don't remember calling him, but to be fair you also don't remember when you stopped being aware of what was happening around you.
“I was actually calling you to check if everything was okay”, he says, “so Heeseung answered and asked me to pick you up”
Jisung actually called to know if you were enjoying the party, imagine his surprise when a man picked up. He froze at the moment, gathering courage to speak and ask him who he was and why he was picking up a call on your phone but before he could get out of his own head and ask, Heeseung was already explaining the situation.
You're so dizzy you can't even keep standing, the whole trip from the car to the apartment is just a blur. You were in the passenger seat, then in the elevator, then running to the bathroom as soon as you set foot into the house.
As you're throwing up everything you ate the whole day, you hear the hurried steps from Jisung. He puts a glass of water in the bathroom sink, kneeling on the ground right next to you. Jisung gathers every loose strand of your hair, holding it away from your face while he looks around, trying not to stare at your pathetic scene.
“It's been a while since we have been in this situation”, you point out, reaching for the glass of water, the nasty taste in your mouth making you wrinkle your nose in disgust.
“I guess you're right”, he answers. “What about a cold shower to sober up?” He jokes, tying your hair in a ponytail now that your head is still.
“No, thank you”, you watch him get up. “I think I'm already sober enough, but I'll accept a warm bath”
Jisung nods, walking to the shower and turning on the hot water to fill the bathtub.
“Are you going to be okay?” He asks, analyzing you to make sure you can take care of yourself. “You're not going to choke on your own vomit, right?” He asks, pretending to be disgusted.
“Shut up”, you tell him, rolling your eyes.
“I'll wait outside, call me if you need help”
You nod, does he think you're a child that can't take a bath? Even if you're a bit drunk, you can still function normally.
You scoff watching him leave the bathroom and close the door, trying to ignore the warmth growing on your cheeks from the simple mention of him helping you while you take a bath.
After a long time under the hot water, you finish your bath and brush your teeth, getting ready for bed, a lot less intoxicated now.
You open the door carefully, you don't have any clothes to change so you're wrapped in a towel and the last thing you need is Han catching you like that again.
Surprisingly, there's a chair by the door’s side with Jisung's clothes on top of it, a shirt and sweatpants but there's no sign of the man. So you just grab the clothes and change in the bathroom.
When you enter your room, Jisung is there, making the bed. He glances at you, he saw you in his clothes a thousand times before but it seems so different at that moment, he can't help but feel his cheeks and ears burn.
Jisung avoids looking at you, he's embarrassed about his reaction, so he keeps making the bed while talking to you.
“I didn't want to go through your wardrobe, so I left my clothes there”, he clears his throat, “I'm glad it fit”
“Of course if fit”, you chuckles. “Jisung I lost count of how many times I borrowed your clothes”
“Yeah, but-”, he mumbles, stopping himself mid sentence, giving up on what he wants to say while shaking his head but you're not having it this time, you're tired of him bottling up the things he wants to say.
“But what?” You ask.
“It's nothing”, he sighs, still not looking at you.
You walk to him, putting your hand on his shoulder to pull him, making him turn around.
“But what, Jisung?” You ask again, forcing him to look at him, noticing his red cheeks for the first time in this conversation.
“It's different now”, he says, “I feel different about you and it's nice seeing you dressed in my clothes”, he shrugs everything at once.
“Ah…” you take a step back, you didn't stop to think about that.
“Can you give me a chance?” He asks suddenly, taking you out of your thoughts, making you look at him with a frown in your face and he would be lying if he said that reaction didn't scare him, but he already gathered all his courage, he can't back down now.
“What?” You ask, confused.
“Let me prove to you why you should stay with me”, he pleads, reaching for your hands and you actually let him take them into his own. “If you fell out of love with me give me a chance to make you fall in love with me again and if you still like me but is not sure about our relationship let me show you that we are worth giving a try”
He spoke slowly this time, making sure you understood every word he said so that if you reject him, he will know that it's not a misunderstanding, you really don't want his love. But if you accept his try, he wants you to know what his purpose is.
You stare at him for a few moments, the silence growing scarier for Jisung but for you it's like time stopped. His eyes, locked on yours, full of hope making you nervous but at the same time, your heart is beating fast. Since the first sentence he spoke, the answer couldn't be other than yes.
Not yes to being in a relationship with him, you still have a lot of doubts but the thought of him trying to win you over is just enough to make your heart flutter and the butterflies on your stomach move faster.
“Do it”, you tell him, looking deeply into his eyes, “prove to me why I should give you a second chance”, you tell him and the relief that washes over his eyes makes it seem like you just told him he is free from an incurable disease.
“Are you sure?” He asks, afraid you'll change your mind but you nod. The first thing you feel is his hard chest against yours, he wraps his arms around your waist and spins you around.
“I'll show you that we are meant to be together”, he says, hugging you tightly and kissing the top of your head.
The mission to make y/n fall in love with Jisung again has officially started.
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A/N: If you like what I write please reblog or let me know in the comments, feedback give me motivation to keep writing. Also, you can buy me a coffee.
Taglist(closed): in red are people I couldn't tag.
@hhwangsmoon @weareapackofstrays @shycreationdreamland @adestayskz @skizmee @ca11me3mily @realviviboss @sofix-hc7 @starsandrqindrops @itshannjisung @redstayrosie @mae-is-cute98 @blithevix @astro-doll-the-star @vlctorriaa @captainchrisstan @rag-iii @notastraykid @jisunghannie @applepie-macaroon @stayingdelulu @sundayysunshine @kidrauhlschik @wolfennracha @meloncremesoda @hanschimpmunk @realrintaro @teejisung @maexc @gyustarzzi @ivaneedssleep @chaeryred @daemon-bunny @broken-glowsticks @ch4nniebang @sleepyleeji @seukijeuxq @luvbangchan @lovesunshinefelix @hyunjins-dimples @castielsfrillywhiteknickers @armystaytiny @literallyjustwanttoread @jisunghannie @jungkookies1002 @diorggukie @channieandhisgoonsquad @mamabymychem @ladylexis @bmnyy
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bbyquokka · 3 months ago
Text
fizzy pop
– yn has a habit of bottling up their emotions, chan comforts them & explains the importance of communicating about feelings/emotions.
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pairing | bang chan x gender neutral reader
genre | angst w comfort – 18+ is strongly advised!
cw | established relationship, mental health (low moods, low/no motivation, lose of interest in hobbies/things), pet names.
words | 2k ~ ( 2,042 )
notes | idk why but i've been putting off on posting this for months, maybe bc im nervous 🤔 don’t forget to leave feedback, reblog and tell me what you think here. i hope you all enjoy! ‹3
m.list — wips list — you can also read it on my ao3
dont repost. dont translate. minors, ageless & default blogs; dni! feedback and reblogs are highly advised and appreciated!
it's just another day. another day of just being there. another day of feeling like you have no purpose in life except to please others. another day of wondering “what is the purpose of me being here?” you fake smiles, say you're "ok" because saying how you actually feel is exhausting.
aside from it feeling exhausting, you also don't want to draw attention to yourself and when you do speak, you feel stupid for doing so, so you keep it all in, bottle it up until it's too much for you to handle. some days you wonder why you even bother to get out off bed.
is it because of the birds you hear outside? the sun's heat that you want to feel on your skin? could it be the laughter and chitter chatter of others? or maybe you want to hear the rain on the leaves–who knows. all you know is that everyday is the same and it's tiring.
the days merge into one. what day is it even? monday? tuesday? oh wait, it's saturday morning. time doesn't exist anymore. in your mind you see no point in getting up out of bed because again, what's the point? 
so why is it that your boyfriend is gently shaking you, asking, no, begging you to get up.
“darlin'. please get up.” chan whispers as he gently shakes you by the shoulders. you sigh deeply, a tired sigh that causes chan to swallow and his suspicions to come to light.
you pull the duvet over your head, body curled in a small and fragile ball. the curtains are still drawn providing darkness despite the morning rays that wish to peak inside. 
chan has been up since the crack of dawn. he has showered, made breakfast and managed to get dressed. he gave you some extra time to sleep in because he knows you're not a morning person but when the number nine on his watch turned to twelve and you're still not up and out, does he grow concerned.
he's had his suspicions for a while. he's noticed how defeated you sound. how there is little to no energy in the words you speak. he's tried everything to cheer you up, thinking, hoping you were just having an off day. but that off day turned into an off week which slowly, but surely, turned into an off month.
you lost your passion for being creative, lost the will to make anything which you despise. being creative is one of the many pleasures you have in life, to be able to make something and share your creations with others is exhilarating but when you feel like this, your mood turns bitter and cold towards everything you do which results in you resenting everything you create.
you lost the energy to speak to people. to pick up the phone and just talk. you're not deliberately ignoring nor trying to be difficult but keeping conversations flowing is just too hard right now and when you think they're giving you the same energy back do you feel so guilty. 
what have i done to deserve this? why am i forced to feel like this. you find yourself questioning everything late at night. your head loud as soon as it hits the pillow and no amount of music you blast down your ears can silence those thoughts.
everything is so exhausting. everything is the same. you just want to disappear whether that be for a few days or forever, you're not quite sure, but certain people around you wont allow that to happen. they are keeping you afloat, head above water. you desperately and silently wish they never let you go, no matter how hard you fight and push them away.
“baby, please.” chan's words dripped with desperation. his knees on the bed behind you as he kneels causing the mattress to dip. his hands on your shoulders gently as his eyes bore into the duvet, burning holes into it until he is burning holes into you. tears threaten to spill down his soft cheeks as he becomes increasingly worried for you.
“chan..“ you whisper, your words shaking. “please.. leave me alone.” 
he swallows. those three last words he hates to hear. now he is left in a difficult position. should he do as you say and leave you? leave you to fester and rot in your own thoughts and feelings. watch you melt into the mattress and become nothing but a lifeless shell. or should he force himself, force you to acknowledge him. show you, tell you that's it's going to be ok–even if you don't believe him in the beginning.
but this is chan and you know more than anyone how stubborn chan can be.
“lets go take a shower yn, together! and maybe we can go out and get lunch at that café you love so much?”
silence. 
“or how about we go to that art shop! pick up those water colours you've been eyeing up for months?”
silence.
“ok well, what about some new cloth–”
“chan please!” you snap, causing him to jump. “what part of leave me alone don't you understand?!”
you don't mean to sound harsh and you hope chan doesn't take it to heart. the last thing you want is to hurt the one person you adore so much. luckily, chan knows you don't mean it but it doesn't hurt him any less.
“all of it.” he softly speaks. you feel the weight being lifted up off the mattress and footsteps against the wood flooring before the bedroom door squeaks open at the hinges.
your heart breaks. hot angry tears finally being set free and rolling down the bridge of your nose and cheeks, soaking into the material of your pillow. you sob, curling up into a ball even more as your heart aches in your chest. you grip onto the pillow as you silently cry out for chan, thinking he has completely left you alone.
but you did ask for it so why do you feel so guilty?
the duvet gets pulled back from you, the cold air hitting your hot and sweaty skin. the mattress dips once again as an arm snakes over your midriff. chest being pressed against your back as chan spoons you.
“don't cry, darlin'. i'm here, your channie is here.” his soft words provide you with a sense of comfort and an indescribable feeling of warmth as well as relief. his hand strokes your soft stomach, his lips kissing your neck so tenderly you worry that he isn't really there. 
“c-chan…” you sob through your words as a way of confirmation. you can't breathe, the pain of everything that's built up over the past months is making it impossible for you to breathe. your mind fogs over as your chest heaves up and down.
you struggle to take breaths as tears stream down your face. your pillow becomes soaked with your tears. chan strokes your unwashed hair gently, hushing you and singing softly to help ground you.
“sh sh sh. you're ok, you're safe.” he whispers.
“sorry! i'm sorry!” you repeat over and over again in your fits of tears. chan continues to hush you, noticing that it's not working so he gently rolls you over to face him and pulls you into his naked chest. 
the warmth and softness of his skin calms you down in an instant. his natural scent hugs your nostrils and sinks into your heart, soothing your heartbeat as well as your mind. you grip onto him, desperately trying to cling onto something before resulting in wrapping your arms around him tightly. 
he gives you a bear hug. arms around your shoulders gently, fingers raking and massaging your scalp. his chest wet with tears as he continues to hush you through your episode.
there isn't much he can do when you're crying like this except wait. wait for it to pass–and it does, fifteen minutes later.
“better?” he gently asks. you peer up at him to notice that his own cheeks are wet with a few tears slowly falling.
“you're crying..” you whisper as you reach up and wipe the tears away. chan laughs softly before leaning into your touch. “why?”
“because it pains me to see you like this, my love.” that guilt comes back, settling in your stomach and wrapping itself around your heart, like black fog. you look down, tears falling from your lower lash line.
“sorry..” you mumble.
“hey.” chan unwraps his arms from you to gently lift up your head. “it hurts because i can't do anything about it. it hurts because i love you! seeing you in so much pain is rough darling. and it's not physical pain either, it's not like i can put a band aid on your wound.”
“i'm sorry i'm like this, chan. sorry i'm so difficult and such a disappointment.”
“oi.” his tone of voice turns stern which causes you to look up at him. his brows furrowed together as he reaches and strokes your cheek. “you're not a disappointment or difficult baby. it's ok to feel like this, to have off days and feel like nothing is right, however, you have to come to me when you feel like this! or if you can't come to me, talk to a friend.”
“but i hate talking about my feelings, chan.. i feel like a burden and that it just bores people and when i do confined in people, it feels like i don't get the comfort i expect to get so i'm left thinking if it's worth it and if i just expect too much from people.”
“what have i told you about bottling things up, mhm?”
“that it's just going to keep building and building until i explode.” you mumble to which chan hums and nods too
“imagine you're a bottle of fizzy pop. your body is the bottle, your feelings are the fizzy liquid. what happens when you shake a bottle of fizzy pop?”
“it bubbles and explodes, creating a huge mess.”
“and what happens when you bottle your feelings up?”
“i get shaken up by the smallest of things, which causes me to bubble and explode..”
“mhm. you have to remember, my darling, that how you feel is valid. your feelings are valid. you might seem like it's something so small or stupid, but that something small could build and build and build.”
“so i should come to you whenever i feel negative?”
“yes.”
“even if i'm frustrated at a piece of work? even if i can't get a recipe right and it annoys me?”
“yes.”
“but that is so small and not as important..”
“yn, if it's bothering you then it's big. if it's bothering you, it's important to me. if you feel angry, upset, energy less, i beg that you come to me or to a friend! it's important that we voice these things, let it be known because you'll feel better.” he tucks your hair behind your ear gently before you nuzzle into his chest, thinking about what he's saying.
he is correct. he always is and that's the thing that sometimes bothers you, but in a good way! it just means that you can't hide anything from chan, whether it's good or bad and when you are feeling down, chan is always there to pick you back up and dust you off, providing you with love and comfort.
“shall we go shower together to start the day?”
“isnt it a bit late for that? besides, hasn't your day already started?” you mumble against his chest.
“it's never too late to start the day and besides, i don't mind ‘restarting’ my day if it means i get to do it with you.” he kisses the top of your head gently, stroking your back as you tangle your legs with his.
“soon.”
“soon?” he questions.
“i just want to spend some more minutes with you..”
“we can spend as many minutes together as you like, my darling. as long as you're happy and content.”
“i'm always happy and content with you, chan. you're my safe space.”
“and i hope i continue to be and provide you with that safe space, yn.”
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msbluebell · 1 year ago
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How We Fall For People Like James Somerton
We're all joking, but this James Somerton thing has me really fucked up.
I wasn't a huge fan of James. I saw a few of his videos and liked them. In the ones I saw he was calm and explained things straightforwardly and even the one or two times he said things against white women...well, that's language I've been seeing on Tumblr since I joined back in my tweenage years. I thought it was just a dismissive joke pointing out a frank reality.
I didn't watch him too much. Just a few videos. I kept meaning to watch more, but I didn't because sometimes I wanted something easier. But I regarded him sell because of how informed he seemed.
And that's the thing, isn't it? He SEEMED informed. He spoke confidently and sometimes quoted queer sounding articles and I trusted him blindly. And why? Because he was giving me information that SEEMED well researched.
Illumanaughtii too. I WAS a consistent fan of hers before other youtubers came out. Because she presented information really well and I like hand drawn characters and because she read academic sounding quotes. I trusted her and her information was stollen. And I feel like a fool for ever having trusted her now, but at least her stollen facts were apparently accurate. Maybe.
James though, he straight up lied. Todd in the Shadows went through a lot of effort to expose those lies. He did so much research that I didn't bother to do. And he admitted he only did it because he happened to know people more informed than him that noticed the lies and went down a rabbit hole.
And maybe if I was more involved I would have noticed. But that's beside the point. what's getting me is I didn't bother to check myself, I just blindly trusted.
And the worst part is I can see why it happened.
I work.
I work, and then I get home, and when I get home I stress. I stress about work I have to do tomorrow, or classes, or finding a new job that actually pays a livable wage. And to escape that stress I go online to AO3, or tumblr, but especially Youtube.
Because I like youtube, I like to have noise in the background while I work. I like to listen to things while I read. And some of the time it's ASMR videos, or watching someone cook something. But mostly? It's history things or video essays.
And when I'm working, or reading, I'll hear a fact, and I'll look up, and I'll think "Huh, that's interesting to know, I didn't know that." And I won't think anything about it.
Because I'm busy, or I'm tired. I'm tired from work, and I don't want to do more work. Or sometimes it's mental health. This is my coping mechanism. I'm trying to learn things, do something to distract myself. I'm not looking to disprove things.
In other words I'm lazy. Or, if I'm being kind to myself, I'm tired.
Maybe if the topic was something I was an expert in I would have noticed. I'm a former ballerina, I'm a failed history major dropout. Maybe if he'd said something like "Holodomor never happened" or "Boudica is a Finnish folk hero" I'd have noticed. Maybe.
But he didn't, and I didn't notice. I assumed he did the work, and why?
Because surely a gay man wouldn't spend hours on youtube talking about Queer history if he wasn't passionate. Because he, a queer man, would surely know about queer history. Surely he wouldn't want to spread lies and hate. And he's quoting from books and articles so why wouldn't I trust him?
My trust was blind and unfounded.
And now I'm reeling from that. I'm reeling because I'm starting to feel like I can't trust a lot of people. How can I listen to any Youtuber casually now?
I can't, I never should have assumed I could.
Now every informative video feels like I need to do tens of hours of research just to be sure what I'm hearing is true. I feel like I can't trust anything unless I do.
James Somerton took my trust.
And it's not only that either. That's not what scares me the most. It's that there are THOUSANDS of people like me. Millions like me. Who are learning something from a video or a tweet or a tumblr post from someone they assume is an expert and are blindly trusting because they assume they can trust it. They don't intend to do their own research because they're tired, or don't know how. And that scars me. I was a history major, I studied tyrants and misinformation and the rise of propaganda, and I, with all my tools to notice, was still blind.
You cannot blindly trust a video, you cannot blindly trust a tweet, you especially cannot blindly trust a tumblr post.
YOU ARE NOT IMMUNE TO PROPOGANDA
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mustainegf · 2 months ago
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Hi! So I was having thoughts and was thinking about Older James with a younger girlfriend. So pretty much, it’s that time of the month for her and she wasn’t used to her boyfriends caring much or taking care of her so she never really mentioned it to James and kept quite about it. James always knew about it and was sweet with her but never pushed to much with it when he saw that she seemed to handle it ok for herself until one month it’s a lot worse than normal and no matter how hard she tries to hide it and just starts taking care of her completely no matter how much she argued it. Running her a bath, rubbing her tummy, holding her, just fluff in general.
Having feels right now and need some fluff with older James🥹
I love this sweet old man so much
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𝐒𝐎𝐅𝐓 𝐀𝐒 𝐂𝐋𝐎𝐔𝐃𝐒 ²⁰²³
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The first time it clicked that James knew about my cycle, it was a second where you catch someone out of the corner of your eye and they're just looking at you with that half grin, like they're in on some big secret. I'd been digging through my purse, trying to find a tampon discreetly while we were out at dinner. James didn't say anything, just continued talking to me about the tour they'd just finished up with in that aged, endearing voice.
I remembered how my breath glued to my throat the instant his hand slid across the table to cover mine. "Baby, it's okay," he'd smiled, almost too casually. I'd blinked at him, my hand stuck mid search. He gave my fingers a gentle squeeze while his thumb brushed against the back of my hand with a nod.
I nodded back, mostly because I didn't know what else to do. My exes never discussed this stuff. They didn't even notice, or if they did, they pretended they didn't. I was used to dealing with this stuff on my own. I'd learned to be discreet about it, to cope with the cramps, mood swings all without making a fuss.
James was different, though.
He never pushed it, never made a big deal out of it, but somehow, he was always there. A heating pad would appear in bed, or he'd send me a text asking if I needed anything from the store, throwing in a stupid little winking emoji that always made me giggle at how much of a sweet old man he was. And it worked for us. I mean, I didn't want him to see me as weak or needy.
My period hit like a punch, a blow that felt unrecoverable. From the instant I woke up, I knew it was going to be a bad day. These cramps were sharper, aching, tugging and eating at my lower back. My head was pounding, and even the thought of food made my stomach churn.
I decided to try and soldier through it like I always did, not wanting to burden James with my misery, but every movement seemed to make it worse. By mid morning, maybe 10AM, I was curled up on the couch, clutching a pillow to my abdomen wondering if maybe the devil would let me sell my soul to get rid of these horrid periods.
I didn't even hear James come in. One minute, I was alone in the living room, the next his shadow draped over me. I opened my eyes enough to see him there, his aged face was sunken with worry for me, his white eyebrows quirked in curiosity.
"You look sick, baby," he cooed softly, kneeling beside the couch. His hand came up to brush the hair out of my face and then warmly kiss my forehead.
"I'm fine," I lied, my voice the weakest it's ever sounded. "Just tired."
"Yeah? And how long have you been lying here?"
I shrugged, not exactly wanting to answer. "Awhile.. It's just…you know, that time."
His face switched from worry to empathy, and he nodded like he understood, which of course he did. I should have known better than to think I could hide this from him of all people. But instead of leaving it at that like he usually did, he pressed his lips together in that way that meant he was deep in thought, "Why don't you let me take care of you today, sweet thing?"
I wanted to debate him, to tell him I didn't need taking care of, to tell him I could handle it myself. But before the words could leave my lips, he was already easing the pillow out of my grasp and sliding his hands under me, and lifting me up into his arms. He didn't even sigh at the weight, it was that simple for him to just lift me.
"James—" I began, but he just shook his head.
"Shh... I got cha," he whispered, tucking me against his chest. James took me down the hall, my face cuddling into the tattoos on his flexing arms. I was too tired, too sore, to fight him on it. and deep down, I wanted this.
As we entered the bathroom, I could already hear him running the bath, steam rising from the tub and beckoning me in. He set me down on the edge of the tub and his hands stuck on my shoulders for a second whilst he crouched down in front of me. "Just relax, okay sweetheart? Let me take care of my girl."
Protests died on my lips as I looked into his soft blue eyes. There wasn't a shred of pity there, no frustration. Only love.
So I nodded, biting my lip to keep from tearing up. It wasn't that I was sad, not really. It was just… overwhelming in the best way, to have someone care this much. In a way nobody else had before.
James helped me undress, his touch so gentle. I felt incredibly embarrassed to take off my underwear and pad, but James was completely unfazed. I think he could see my discomfort as i stepped out of the undergarment, doing my best to keep my les clamped together. "it's okay, I'll deal with it. Don't be embarrassed." he whispered with a kiss to my forehead.
When I was finally in the tub, the hot water sucked out some of my uncomfort. James sat down on the floor beside the tub, one hand whisking lazily through the water. He would gently pull his hand from the water, thick fingertips dripping with warm water, before the back of his fingers found my shoulders, which weren't fully submerged. He trailed warm water over my skin, forcing a sigh from my lips
"Feel better?" he whispered.
I nodded, closing my eyes and leaning back against the cool porcelain. "Yeah... Thank you, Jamie..."
With James, it was different. Maybe because he was older, but he understood how to take care of me better than any man ever had.
After a short while, he stood up and reached onto the rack for a towel, and then slung it over his arm like some kind of butler, which brought me a small smile. "C'mon, let's get you dried off, love."
I let him help me out of the tub, my body heavier than it should have been. He wrapped the towel around me, carefully drying me, even between my legs, telling me not to think about the towel, ad that he'd wash it.
I looked to the counter and saw that he'd gotten my favorite pajama pants, and a shirt of his for me to wear, as well as a fresh pair of underwear with a new pad. Holy shit, he was a sweetheart. Any woman would swoon for this.
James carefully helped me into the clothes and brushed my wet hair before gently leading me to bed. Silently, James pulled back the covers on the bed and nudged me onto the mattress. He tucked the blankets around me and then climbed in alongside me, reeling me close to his chest. I could feel his heartbeat thump beneath my cheek.
I had no idea how much I'd really needed him until now.
"Why are you so good to me?" I mumbled into his chest, taking in a deep breath of his sweet and masculine smell.
He chuckled quietly, caressing his fingers on my cheek. "Because I love you, sweet thing."
I smiled, his words wrapping around my weak body like a super soft warm blanket. "I love you too."
He kissed the top of my head. "Get some rest, beautiful. I'm right here."
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vanesycho · 3 months ago
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i thought abt board student reader that smokes and one she goes outside to smoke and wonbin appears telling her that it's his spot but then they start smoking together and it leads to more.
thank you so much for your request🫶🏻 I hope I could write something as you wanted, enjoyy🤍
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Just chatting with Wonbin while smoking<3
wc:1,3k
You let out a sigh of relief when you finally had some free time. Being exposed to those people for a long time had tired you out, you had always been someone who liked being alone more. When you went out, you sat on a nearby bench, first inhaled the scent of the air, then took out your cigarette and put it in your mouth, you took the lighter but when you were about to light it... "What a shame you have to leave here." you looked up and picked up your cigarette, the person you saw was none other than Wonbin. You didn't talk to him much, but you heard his name a lot, mostly in a bad way. Everyone talked about how cold and egotistical he was, but you preferred not to listen to the others, as if they were very different.
"Why would I leave?" Wonbin sat down next to you and took out his own cigarette as he spoke, “Because this is my place, I usually smoke here, and you’re going to invade my private time.” You grinned. He had to be kidding, right? “We’re not in elementary school, are you really going to fight over bench?” Wonbin didn’t answer, he looked like he was looking for something, you knew exactly what he was looking for so you handed him your lighter. He looked at your face for a moment and then reached for the lighter but you pulled your hand back. “I’ll sit here?” You asked with raised eyebrows. It was sounded like a question but you weren't going to get up even if he said no. Wonbin rolled his eyes briefly and without saying anything, he grabbed the lighter from your hand and lit a cigarette, handing it back to you, but when you were about to take it, it was him who pulled your hand away this time. "You'd better keep quiet?"
You grinned, grabbed the lighter and lit your own cigarette, leaning back and looking around. Even though the first few minutes were quiet, "Do you take smoke breaks often?" when he heard your laughing, he frowned, not understanding what was funny, you turned to him, seeing his confused face amused you even more "You're the one who just told me to be quiet, and now you're trying to start a conversation?"
He didn't answer, he just took a drag on his cigarette. You did the same. "Usually, yes, I take a smoke break, but I don't see you very often.You?" He studied your face for a moment. "I'm almost always here, but I never noticed you either." He took a drag on his cigarette and continued, "Maybe it's because you haven't caught my attention yet." You were surprised by this statement but tried not to show it. You turned your gaze to the ground with a slight smile. Spoke in a sarcastic tone. "Maybe it's not that important to get your attention." He grinned "Is that so? Maybe I'm more interesting than you think."
The cigarette smoke dispersed in the air, Wonbin leaned his head back and looked up at the sky, today was cloudier than other days. Then he looked at you, you turned around and looked at him the same way. "I don't know if you're interesting, but all I've heard about you are comments about how cold and egotistical you are." Wonbin threw his head back and laughed at what you said, he didn't seem offended at all, he didn't have anything to be offended about "Not surprised, I hear this from many people, I just act cold around people I don't want to be around, which is quite natural."
You didn't comment, he was right, You didn't need people to love you, anyone who wanted to come would come and get to know the real you, Wonbin must be thinking the same thing.
The silence continued as a few more minutes passed, your first cigarettes were already finished. You handed him the lighter as you took out a new one, smiled slightly as he leaned his head towards the lighter, you lit his cigarette. "You're weird." He took a drag on his second cigarette. "And why is that?"
"If you ask, everyone in here knows you but they talk badly about you, at the same time there is a part where you are loved by everyone, they say you look very cold but I see you laughing and having fun most of the time." He listened to what you said without interrupting, the slight smile on his lips never left, he looked at you when you finished your sentence. "Am I being watched or do you do this to everyone?"
The question that caught you off guard made you silenced, no it wasn't actually like that, on the contrary the person you saw everywhere was Wonbin, like something fate was trying to put together but you both rejecting this. When he saw that you were silent, he laughed with his cigarette in his mouth and came forward from the bench he was leaning against. Leaned forward and turned his head towards you, you looked at him the same way. "As I said, I'm only like this with people I'm close to, I may be too cold towards other people but honestly I don't really care what they think of me."
You nodded, not taking your eyes off each other, awkward silence and staring at each other continued for a while. "You're not cold to me, but you don't know me either." This time, Wonbin was the one caught off guard by the unexpected question, he just smiled, averting his gaze to the floor "How am I if I'm not cold?" You tilted your head slightly and thought about Wonbin’s question. It seemed like you wanted to say something about him, so you chose your words carefully. "I don't know. Maybe distant...But it's like there's something else behind that distance."
These words caught his attention. He didn’t take his eyes off yours, his expression becoming a little more serious. "You realized that in such a short time?" You smiled slightly. "Maybe. I like to observe people. But most of the time you only see their surface. I don't know if it's the same with you." Your words made him think for a while, you watched him inhale his cigarette, how he brought it to his lips. "You may want to understand things, but have you ever thought about letting go?"
'Letting go' wasn't something you were familiar with, you had always lived your life planned, maybe every second, but what was different today was that your break time was already over. But you were still here, continuing to chat with him. This new but intense conversation between you had opened the door for both of you to be more open and honest with each other. "Well... if you're curious, maybe one day I can show you what's beyond that distance."
You frowned slightly. “Is that an offer?” Wonbin spoke in a low voice, turning his gaze away from you. "Maybe. Or maybe I'm just allowing some boundaries to open." You sensed a hidden invitation behind Wonbin’s words. You wondered if you were ready to open up more. Silence, but this time it was more meaningful and intense. After a while, you put out your finished cigarette and stood up. He looked up at you and noticed the smile on your face.
"One day I'd like to see what's beyond those boundaries." A slight smile appeared on Wonbin's face as he thought about what you said. He watched you as you walked in, he knew you were different, you had always caught his attention but now his ideas had changed, he definitely wanted to get to know you better, he wanted you.
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notroosterbradshaw · 1 year ago
Text
about: just some smut to fend off jetlag. i love sleepy Bradley, I make no excuses that I feel he does his best work in the early hours of the day. This was supposed to be a drabble… it’s not anymore. Sorry.
word count: 3.2k
warnings: nsfw 18+, language, pure fluff, smut.
masterlist.
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The morning after the night before when Bradley met your family for the first time, you'd flown across the world to surprise your dad for his birthday and really, it luckily coincided with Bradley's time off. When you mentioned heading home for your old man's special day that usually kicked off your family's holiday season, you almost fell out of your seat when he said maybe it was time he met the fam face-to-face, not just making small talk over FaceTime. It almost didn’t seem fair that he was subjected to meeting everyone this way, but alas… here you were the next morning, jet lag kicking in while wrapped protectively in Bradley’s strong, golden arms and washed in the relief your family fucking loved him. You weren't overly surprised. 
Bradley's quiet, unassuming charm was just who your mum wanted you to end up with, he was into golf and surfing, so your dad and brothers thought he was the bee's knees. Your sister on the other hand... 
You had to fend her off more than you would have liked. You were confident in your relationship with Bradley, knowing he'd never allow anything to happen. "You're coming across a little desperate," you hissed after one or two drinks, which mortified her, and she apologised, admitting she was just happy to finally get to meet the guy who'd swept you off your feet. "Yes, my feet," you reminded her. When she pointed out how possessive you sounded, you didn't deny it. But she got it and gave you space for the rest of the evening. 
Ahh, sisters. 
Bradley felt your body writhe in the gentlest of movements against his and he sighed. Sleep hadn’t come easy for either of you and compounded with the food and booze you’d indulged in the day before, neither of you slept much. “You okay, sweetheart?” he whispered at God-knows-what-o’clock. 
“What time is it?” You asked softly.
“I dunno, baby. Sun is barely rising,” he admitted. “Can’t hear a peep in the house.”
Which was nice because yesterday was intense. Everyone was so excited to meet your new American boyfriend (fairly, it’d been about eight months, give or take with a few deployments), the incredibly handsome navy pilot whom you’d met one evening at a naval bar while travelling. You’d caught his eyes behind his sunglasses while he played the piano, the crowd around him as swept away with him as you were. The first half-smile in your direction, as he sang, had done you over in a way not one single person on the planet had before. 
He'd charmed you instantly. He still charmed you constantly. 
“Did you get any sleep?” you asked, biting back a yawn.
“Not really,” he peppered tender kisses into your shoulder blade and smiled into your skin as you pressed back into him, the oh-so-quiet moan made for his ears only waking him from his dreaded fog as well. “I’ll try and get a kip somewhere today. That fuckin’ flight murdered me.” 
“You were happy to fly economy,” you muttered. “I know you’re used to tight quarters, but fuck Bradley. It was 15 hours." 
“I know, I know I fucked up. I was looking at upgrades overnight. I’ll use my discount and stuff; we can do it flying home.”
“You sure?”
“Sue me for wanting to save a buck,” he sighed, with a tired, deep chuckle. “Flight was so full; people may as well have been sitting on the wings.”
“It’s Christmas. People travel.”
“You don't say,” he affectionately gripped your waist, rolling you to him and kissed you. “Good morning, I think," he nuzzled your nose against his and asked if you wanted some water or anything.
You shook your head, rolling back and snuggling into him as he adjusted his arms around you again, his nose buried in your hair. "I think Dad is gonna expect you for at least nine holes today." 
"I think so, yeah. Grill me and make sure I'm good enough for his little girl.” He murmured and if he was honest, he was the teeniest bit nervous. He’d never really been in relationships long enough to meet families… and who would he introduce anyone to, except for Mav?
"I think you'll be fine."
"He probably wouldn't be if he knew what a deviant I've turned his smart, beautiful baby girl into.”
You giggled quietly as you could feel the soft ends of his moustache curve into a smirk against the nape of your neck. "He'd send you back on the first flight to LA."
"I would believe that," he said softly. 
"I think yesterday went really well, Bradley," you confided quietly to him.
"You think? I was on my very best behaviour," he teased you.
"Yes, you were," you admitted. Not that he ever wasn't. Bradley was instilled with a remarkable set of manners. He was chivalrous and courteous to a fault, incredibly sweet and at times, pensive, even shy. Almost make believe that you were lucky enough to share his time. You wriggled back against him, and you could feel the hard-on straining through his boxer briefs. "Down, boy." 
"Can't help it," he sighed. "You know what you do to me with that ass. I know what you want. You're not that transparent."
You bit back your pleased smile as his wandering hands travelled down your side, fingertips toying with the hem of his old Navy tee that was now your bed shirt. At home, you were nude sleepers. At your parents' home during the holidays? You showed decorum and respect and you both hated it, preferring skin-on-skin of the other but alas, anyone could walk in at any time. 
“Have a thought about how we might be able to fuck this jetlag off…” 
“Oh, yeah?” at this point, you’d do anything and with Bradley’s travel for work, you hoped maybe he might have some insight. You had planned to just power through and try not to be the world’s most exhausted asshole. 
"You just move your thigh a little this way..." he murmured, his palm cupping your hamstring and you pressed back into him, grinning softly. “And I just slide up in here – ”
“Confident of you, don’t you think?”
“You’re always wet for me,” he whispered against your skin. “Unless you deny it.”
“Never…” you told him, reaching back to wrap an arm around his strong neck. “I just can't keep it down with you. Why didn’t you convince me to get the AirBnb?”
He loved how vocal you were during sex. Your moans, the hisses, the way you'd bite your lip when you were so close. That groan as you came, or the little squeal when you were too sensitive was burned into his brain as his favourite sounds in the world. 
"Just lemme hold you then, it's okay, sweetheart," he grumbled. “I’ll live if you can.” 
“Asshole,” you muttered as he chuckled. 
“Do you want a blowjob?” You nervously offered, turning back to him and he looped your thigh over his hip and perched you above him with such little effort on his behalf - you loved how strong he was but you knew what was waiting for you, Bradley made no secret he was turned on and you loved that you were able to have him on a knife-edge at all times. 
The one per cent, he’s told you once before. 
You’re so sweet to him as you slowly dragged your hand into the waistband of his boxer briefs, revealing more and more skin, cock springing free, slapping against his toned, tanned Adonis belt. Long, thick and dripping with precum already and he almost blushed at how eager he was.
“I’ll never say no,” he replied, “And I know you might be uncomfortable here. Your dad is right across the hall, baby."
“But my daddy is right here…” you immediately corrected him, and he smiled darkly to himself. You didn't use that term lightly, you couldn’t nfi fed to him he had the ability to bring out your innermost feral when you least expected it and he would do his utmost to encourage it (if you were comfortable). 
“Jesus,” his head was swirling, trying to keep calm and not blow his load the second you bared your tongue to him but there was absolutely nothing sweet about it. He was a preening mess when you went down on him. The night you'd told him you weren't overly experienced in blow jobs was the greatest night of his life, coaching you through what he liked and watching you perfect your generous technique time and time again. 
These days, you loved giving Bradley head. He gave you confidence, he made you feel sexy and not like it was only about him on the receiving end. He’s whispered and encouraged, and when it all got too much, he told you he was close. He was neither here nor there on the whole spit or swallow thing… until you and your preference but he was never left empty-handed.
"Shh," you hissed. "Not a sound." 
That one thing you did for him that absolutely made him come undone. And he'd bury his face in your pussy all day if you allowed him to show you how fucking grateful, he was for all the pleasure you presented him. Your sweet, tight wetness that he would eagerly drown himself in if you’d let him. 
Your honeyed tongue delicately tasted the flawless head of his cock, lapping up the precum as Bradley's eyes rolled back into his head and his big hands reached to knot into your hair as you went to work, swirling your tongue and looking up with your big, scheming eyes, knowing you had him at his most precarious. 
He was a weapon in his training, his mind and body were always primed to do what was asked of him, but you were the exception and it scared and excited him.
He could feel himself getting so close to painting the back of that beautiful mouth, and while it pained him to say it, the way your eyes softened told him he’d made the right choice. “Come on, baby, I want you.” 
You gently pulled away and asked, “You don’t want me to finish?”
“No, I wanna fuck, baby. Watch you lose control.” 
“Okay,” you said, your soft hand trading with your warm mouth to tenderly pump and tease him. 
“Gimme a sec. I don't have condoms close,” he whispered. “They're in my luggage.”
"Just pull out, sweetheart," you enticed him, wanting to feel all of him. It was so infrequent you fucked without protection, and of course, you both preferred it that way but after a pregnancy scare (or not, neither of you was really sure) a few months back, you'd both decided to stop tempting fate and ensuring there was a stash of condoms at his place, your place... the goddamn Bronco – Bradley understood that it was your body and you didn’t want to be on the pill. A condom was the least he could do, and he knew it. 
Bradley helped you move up his body and rest you above him. "Are you sure?" he kissed you, your gleaming teeth lightly stinging into his bottom lip with an affectionate nip. 
“I trust you,” you told him. "Cum where you need...”
Truth be told, he wanted to cum deep, but he licked back a wet smile and he moved to his knees to pull his navy tee over your head, bearing your beautiful breasts to him, full, round, nipples begging for attention. “On your back, baby,” he urged, guiding you under him, anticipating how wet you were for him, legs splaying open unashamed. He rested the head of his cock on your weeping cunt, his fingers spreading your bare lips and sweeping your slick across your clit, fascinated by that little peep of desperation from you. Your head fell back against the pillows, bliss sweeping through you as he sweetly pressed one finger into you. “Drippin’,” he reported, pressing in another finger and his thumb rubbing tenderly against your throbbing clit. “Gonna gush for me?” 
You probably would, Bradley’s ability to drag absolutely everything out of you blew your mind each time. “Need your cock. Fill me up, Bradley.” 
Pushing in, one delicious inch by delicious inch, licking his full lips as your back curved to take him as deeply as possible. He buried his face in your breasts, holding one in his calloused palm, eyes fluttering closed as he traced, left wet, open-mouthed kissed and tenderly bit the other, and the groan you let you made him clamp his palm over your mouth. “You’re so wet, baby,” he stared deeply into your eyes as he evened his breath with the first few rolls of his slender hips. "But you're gonna wake your parents if you don’t control yourself."
"Let them fuckin' hear," you muttered behind your hand (you’d die if they heard you though) as he chuckled and began his ruthless assault on your senses, one thrust at a time. 
"You're too good to me," Bradley reminded you in disbelief.  
"All for you," you confided, as you watched the beads of sweat break across his brow as you dug your nails into his well-worked traps, willingly knowing it would leave a mark courtesy of your fresh manicure. You raised your hips to meet his deep, plunging thrusts, fucking into you strong and deep. He felt incredible, you don't think anyone had loved on you as Bradley Bradshaw could. So thorough, and never one to leave you hanging. 
Too long, too sore? He'd pause and tenderly withdraw to hold you, reassuring you that it was fine, and your comfort was paramount. Too sensitive after coming too hard, he'd give you time to recover, finding other ways to bring you pleasure.
It was nice to be considered in your relationship, in your sex life especially. In the past, you'd been made to feel like a machine, if you didn't cum, partners still could, and you'd just deal with it. For a long time, that stuck with you and having someone consider you like Bradley would almost seem too good to be true at the start. 
But that consideration never lapsed. He was make-believe and you fucking hoped if this man and everything he brought to you was a dream that you’d never, ever wake up. 
Desperate to keep himself controlled, Bradley reached for the headboard of your old bed, gripping it for dear life as he tried so damn hard to avoid coming. He loved fucking you raw, and since birth control was completely your choice, you two had to stop playing this dangerous game. Because one day? It would beat you both.
"I need to cum, Bradley," you whined to him as he nodded, chewing his lower lip, and putting your delicate fingers in your mouth, not losing his rhythm. He knew. He knew how close you were. 
"Lemme see you touch yourself, baby. Get those fingers - " he gasped as you clenched around him. "Get 'em nice and wet and play with that sweet, tight pussy. Lemme see you fall apart.”
Before, language like that would embarrass you, but with Bradley, it only spurred you on. It was incredible the ways he’d helped you grow and mature as a friend, partner and lover. As instructed, and in the low early morning light, Bradley’s breath hitched, watching you touch yourself and you couldn’t help it, the beat of his cock against your g-spot, your fingers pressing rough circles into your clit and you started to come. 
“Yes, baby. Yes,” he urged, moving his mouth to your ear, whispering his sweet encouragement. “You feel so good, just a little mo – ” he forced his mouth against yours, kissing your pleasure to him, to keep the noise down. He wrapped his hand under your hip, lifting your waist to push harder into you as you trembled below him, your pussy clutching his cock, spasming as he shuddered against your lips. “Yes, baby.”
“Jesus, Bradley, fuck me,” you begged as his hips speed up like a piston, thrusting hard into your swollen, sensitive pussy, his hand clutching yours away from your strained clit and pressing intensely in your place, hoping to drag your orgasm out and as you fell, lifeless, back against the squishy pillows, pussy pulsating, Bradley grunted low he was coming and after his final few thrusts, he quickly withdrew and unloaded, stroking himself until he was spent, pearly ribbons of cum decorating your belly and breasts. 
He collapsed beside you, taking your cheeks in his face and kissing you wildly. “I love you. I love you, baby,” he kissed you again, and though you were spent, you returned his affections, because truly… you loved Bradley Bradshaw with your entire being. It was going to take a lot to change that. “Are you okay?” he asked, chest still heaving as he breathed, his pointer finger tracing through the mess he made on you.
“I’m good, sweetheart,” you assured him as he gave you one last, final kiss.
“Think that helped with your jetlag?” he teased.
“Makes me want another round,” you admitted as he chuckled and raised an eyebrow. 
“Of course you do,” he pressed a kiss into your pulse and lifted his lips back to yours, holding you close and just like horny teenagers, enjoying making out for a few moments in the afterglow. “Where’s that shirt gone?” he asked, peering over the side of the bed, and cleaning you up. “Jackson Pollack painting here.”
“Be less proud,” you told him as he snorted.
“Yes, ma’am,” he pressed another kiss to your lips. “Sure you’re okay?”
“Perfect, but let me go pee,” you whispered as Bradley kissed you long and deep, he nodded into the kiss but was not quite ready to leave you leave him. 
“Go, clean up, baby,” he helped you up from the bed, your legs precarious and meandering like Bambi. “Careful,” he sighed, wistfully. But he knew it already, you were thoroughly fucked, just how he liked it. 
A few hours later and thankfully, a few more hours of sleep, your alarm woke you, the sun much higher in the sky and the heat of the day starting to rise. You’d showered and told him to come down when he was ready, you’d help your Mum with some brekky.
“You want eggs?”
“Anything,” Bradley admitted. “Famished.”
“Okay, sweetheart,” you cupped his face in your palms and kissed him lightly. “Don’t rush.”
“Okay,” he gave a small grin but didn’t much feel like lingering. After a quick shower, he dressed, annoyed he didn't pack any golf gear, at minimum the shoes that you gave him grief for every time he wore them, but maybe he'd treat himself and buy some at the course today. He rifled through his bag, clutching the velvet box in his palm tightly, convinced more than ever that this was real, this was happening and soon, he'd hope to have you wearing his mother's engagement ring too. 
Slapping on his CVN-71 cap, he knew you went a bit feral when he perched it backward. May as well leave you with good thoughts while he was out and about, asking your old man for your hand on the golf course. And if it went badly, it was also something to identify him when the authorities found him if your dad said no. 
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marys2ndson · 4 months ago
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hunting fucking sucks: a fic rec list
I just love when their lives suck not because they’re vessels for archangels or whatever, but just because their job is the worst. thankless, dangerous, morally ambiguous, leaving them injured and dirty and bone-tired. i <3 whump
Due East by sowell (4,700 words)
Just hunts and angst and them, together. Love the characterization. 
“I think I like you injured. Less bitchy,” Dean says with a smile, and Sam blinks at him. / “What?” / “You think I haven’t noticed you sulking for two days straight?”
Hard to Come By by sevenfists (1,700 words)
Hunting, driving around, sleeping in shitty motels. Making difficult choices, dealing with hard realities. 
"You don't smoke," Sam says, and Dean says, "What's it look like I'm doing?" The cigarette tastes like ass. He smokes it anyway, tapping the ash out the open window. It's August. Sam turns up the air conditioning. Dean turns it back down.
Below Breath by kalliel (3,100 words)
Season 2, case fic. Love the complete lack of exposition. You’re just thrown into it on Dean’s terms, and everything is complicated and difficult and unknown. 
Dude, he says, and shoves you in the back with his shotgun. You resist the urge to turn around and smack him with it. Or kiss him, all teeth. See how much he’s paying attention then. 
Every Rhyme Without Reason by kalliel (44,800 words) 
Season 1, case fic, Sam POV. Fascinating and atmospheric and a tough read bc Sam’s life is very uphill at this point, but he’s so present, wrestling and grappling with it. Love him. <3
Maybe they killed that rawhead, released that reaper, slashed that bax'aan's throat. Maybe they'll kill this thing in Rime. But this is what's gonna get them: They have $127.34, four more nights, half a tank of gas, and some cold leftovers to their name. Out here, there's nowhere to go but down; and even then, they're going to have to limp.
With Gravy by kalliel (3,700 words)
Vague season 2. A hunt gone wrong. Slim chances of survival, complete darkness, pain, and heroism. 
The tunnel stretches on and on, and all Dean hears is their footsteps getting heavier, sloppier. One kid cries. The woman cries. The man's leg doesn't quite clear some jutting rocks, and he weeps.
The Real Thing by ameliacareful (14,200 words)
Jensen wakes up in a motel room in Dean’s place. So outsider POV. That thing about the third trial, about Tom and Shep… Kill me. 
“Are you doing that on purpose?” / “What?” / “Sounding like him?” / “A little. Does it work?” Jensen asked. / Sam did that funny little flicker of a smile/grimace that Jared only did as Sam. “Yeah, it does.” His gaze hardened. “Don’t do it again.” / Sam was suddenly very big. Armed. / “Gotcha,” Jensen said.
Catch Your Death by road_rhythm (22,300 words)
They work a ghost hunt while Sam’s sick. This fucks severely! All their petty fights and their biases and bickering really get the spotlight they deserve, as well as the fact that they just really love and care about each other. Feels exactly like a really good ep of s2. And takes up some of the interesting Sam issues as well.
It was this, every time. Sam lashed out and Dean came back with impenetrable patience and washcloths and medicine and touch and one day it would be his life. And there was no answering back to that.
my habit of breaking hearts as soon as i have them by acccording2thelore (6,600 words)
WARNING: major character death. 
A hunt gone wrong. Staggering grief and horror mixed with intimacy and connection. <3 
If he can just get to Garth, he can send up some of his people and help carry Sam to the base of the mountain. Dean won’t make it that far.
the blurriness of being alive by hathfrozen (3,500 words)
WARNING: major character death. 
Sam dies of an infection.
“They don’t get to grieve for him,” Dean tells Miracle when he decides he isn’t calling anybody to tell them. “They ain’t allowed. They don’t get it.” Dean’s had the worst things in the known universe leeching off of him, trying to turn him into evil, but this is the most rotten, meanest he’s ever felt. He doesn’t fucking care.
A Lifetime or Two by nigeltde (18,400 words)
They work a case with their mom; Sam gets banged up; they try something new. This fic feels so real and lived in. The familiarity between Sam and Dean, the way Sam feels left out, Sam’s quiet loneliness and enduring hope, Dean’s desperate affection. <3
Sam would say lucky it was just broken bones. Lucky nothing else cut too deep. Lucky his ear was intact. Dean gets lost, strung out, trying to calculate: if Sam had been concussed, would that still be good luck? If he’d lost the finger, should Dean be thankful? Where does it end, the tallying? Sam thrown through glass, dragged across pavement, tossed into a car, stitched up in this cramped doll’s house of a room, having to bluntly endure; this is what he’s supposed to be grateful for?
Settle Down My Shivered Bones by abitingsmile (4,800 words)
WARNING: disordered eating, food insecurity, and child neglect. 
Pre-series. John, unreliable and off hunting somewhere, and Sam and Dean, making it work with too little cash and too little food. Love this exact flavor of codependency, not sweet, but hard-earned and for survival. 
Sam still bickered with him about school and television and laundry, but not about food. Hell, he practically waited for Dean to give him permission to eat, because that way they knew there’d be enough. John or no, this was something incredibly important they could control, they could handle. John simply wasn’t in the loop anymore.
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t3a-tan · 4 months ago
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Romantic and Hopeless (1/?)
First / Previous / Next
Based on @tinyundercover's soulmate AU mechanics! Kind of heavy... I want to continue it though! To have Oscar and Sammy meet at least. Enjoy ^^
---
“Hello?”
Sammy's breathing hitched as she heard the voice suddenly echo in her head, her attempt at sleeping being ruined immediately. She managed to avoid jolting from surprise, and glanced down at Tanner's sleeping form to ensure he wasn't stirring. The boy continued to snore softly curled into her body heat.
“Hello? Are you there? Oh, um… put your hands together to respond! Like praying. And then just think. I know some people don't really know about soulmates.”
It sounded like a boy around her own age, and he was very excited. Sammy hesitantly shifted her hands away from where she had been cradling Tanner, and interlocked her fingers. She tilted her head, brows furrowed. Soulmate? I think I remember something about that...
“Hi?” Her mental voice was confused and unsure.
“Oh my gosh. Hey! You have no idea how much I've been looking forward to meeting my soulmate..! Let me know if I'm being too much, okay? Hm… what are you up to right now? Am I interrupting anything?”
Sammy glanced out of the glass enclosure she and her brother were being contained in, barely able to see anything as the only things illuminating the room were a few alarms and other random lights. Ryker had left the lab at the same time as usual, so they were trying to sleep as much as possible until he was back.
“I'm trying to sleep.” She responded simply. There was very little point in communicating with her soulmate considering the situation Sammy was in, but she had to admit that it was nice to hear a new voice. A friendly voice.
“Oh. Just going to bed early, or are you in a different time zone?” The voice replied and Sammy blinked with confusion.
“Time zone?”
“Yeah! It's like um… uh… wow. I guess I don't know what a time zone is. Here— What time is it for you?” A small smile of amusement managed to break out on Sammy's tired expression. She had to admit that whoever this guy was he sounded like someone she would get along with. Too bad I'll never meet him.
“I don't know what time it is. There are no windows down here.” Hopefully that would clue him in on her situation a bit. Borrowers usually kept track of the time consistently, but Sammy had no idea what time it was, what day it was, what month it was, or even the year. She was probably close to 18 though if her soulmate was speaking to her.
“What do you mean? Can't you check outside if you don't have a clock?” Came the answer, and Sammy couldn't help but sigh. She really didn't feel like telling this stranger her sob story, no matter how nice his voice sounded.
“I just go to sleep when I'm tired. I could stay awake a bit longer though… Tell me about yourself.” She casually changed the subject, with enough force that it would be hard to go back but not too much that it was obvious she didn't want to discuss it. It seemed to work because she heard his voice chime in reply.
“Well— we can't tell each other our names, but just imagine my name is super cool, yeah? Uhh… let's start with basic basics I guess. My favourite colour is red, my favourite food is…pasta. And. Hm. Well, I just turned 18, so it's my birthday.” He responded, clearly sheepish about being put on the spot.
“Happy birthday to you then. What's the date again?” She asked, unsure of how old she was at this point, but guessing she was almost 18. She knew for a fact that it had been around 3 years so far because Ryker would occasionally make mentions of the passing time.
“It’s July 17th. How old are you by the way?”
“17. Hopefully 18 in January.” The ‘hopefully’ slipped out instinctively; Sammy wasn't under any delusion that she had no chance of dying before reaching her next birthday, and she didn't feel sad about it necessarily. She had already spent so long in this kind of mindset that it was more of a statement of fact than anything else.
She looked down at Tanner again. So he'll be 14 in October then. Time flies. If I count the days I might be able to wish him a happy birthday on the actual day.
“Hey, don't talk like that. Maybe I'll even get to wish you a happy birthday in person..!” Her soulmate responded positively, and Sammy smiled sadly, looking down at her scuffed knees and bruised legs, pulling the hem of her gown down a bit more.
“Maybe.” No. There was no chance she was getting out of here. Ryker was watching things much too closely, and Sammy knew she was getting more and more exhausted by the week. It was hard to keep fighting when it was easier to give in.
It didn't take long for Sammy to realise something was off about her soulmate. He never spoke about typical borrower things— he talked almost like a human most of the time, mentioning friends coming over as if it was like popping from burrow to burrow. He said he liked video games, and at first Sammy assumed he liked watching humans play video games but then he had also mentioned playing them himself.
The most damning thing to convince her though was the food. Even if he ate the same thing most days, that thing was certainly nothing a borrower would have access to so regularly. Sammy's parents had always tried to keep a variety of food whilst she and Tanner were growing up, but they couldn't have regular meals, especially not more than once a week.
When he mentioned skipping school that's what 100% solidified it for her. Her soulmate was a human. Somehow. And that thought scared her.
“Hey, are you feeling alright? You've not been responding much recently… If I can do anything to help, let me know.” Sammy was once again presented with a dilemma at the sound of her soulmate’s soothing voice. He sounded genuine, but Sammy knew humans weren't capable of that. They were monsters, plain and simple. If they are nice one moment they'll be terrible the next.
She glanced in Ryker's direction, confirming that he was distracted writing on his stupid notebook before clasping her hands together and closing her eyes.
“Sorry. I'm just feeling a bit tired lately. I—”
“What are you doing?” Sammy jolted in surprise, her hands immediately unclasping as the rumbling of Ryker's voice fell over her. His grey eyes bore down on her and a shiver ran up her spine from the contact, only keeping her sense enough to not backpedal away. Her mouth opened but an explanation wouldn't come to her lips; what could she really say she was doing instead?
“You what?”
“I must say, you don't seem the religious type, Sammy. This isn't the first time I've seen you put your hands together like that after all.” He gestured over his shoulder towards one of the cameras that were pointing towards the glass enclosure, his eyes never leaving Sammy's form.
She cursed internally. Since Ryker hadn't mentioned it up until now she figured it had either not been visible to the cameras or that he wasn't checking them regularly. Turns out, like the snake he was, he had just been waiting to catch her off guard in the act.
“Lost your train of thought? I get that. I forget what I’m saying half the time too.”
“I…got a soulmate…” She responded, brows furrowing with frustration and gaze pointed away from the doctor. She figured he would already know what that was— it wasn't like it was uncommon for humans after all— but his expression didn't change. He only dragged his notebook over to sit in front of him again, clicking his pen.
“And what does that entail? I presume it's some sort of link between you and a partner. Probably telepathic. How interesting…” Sammy could spy what seemed to be a genuinely curious look in his eyes and the hint of a smile playing at his lips. She had never seen him express much of any emotion besides anger before, and the fact that she didn't know what his smile meant frightened her.
As she was internally panicking over what that smile might mean for her, she snapped out of it when he spoke again.
“Well? Is it?” Sammy nodded, shrinking back when Ryker's excitement seemed to increase at her confirmation. “How intriguing. I noticed there was something a bit different about… hm.. but…”
He trailed off, just leaving Sammy with questions and no answers. She was nervous about putting her hands together again, unsure if that would get her in trouble. Ryker had gone through great lengths to completely shut her and Tanner off from any hope after all…
What if he tied my arms down? Or cut them off…or tied my arms to my torso… or…
“Go ahead and speak to them, her, him again. I want to watch more closely.” It wasn't a request. Sammy knew that much by now. She could feel her heart pounding in her chest as she shakily clasped her hands together, closing her eyes.
“H-hey. Sorry, I'm really fucking scared right now. I don't know if we'll be able to talk after this.” The words came from her faster than she could think them through, and she couldn't help but curse again at her panicked apology. “Shit.”
“Woah woah— what's wrong? Are you in danger?”
Sammy's eyes opened briefly, watching Ryker scribble away in his notebook again, recognizing that he was writing at the same pace that words were being shared. That's impossible. She closed her eyes, shoulders bunching up.
“No. Yes. Maybe. All of the above? I can't tell you. I don't know how, but I think he's listening.” The scribbling stopped abruptly for a couple seconds, before slowly starting up again. Sammy took a breath to calm her racing heart, angry tears pricking at the corners of her eyes at the fact that Ryker was once again taking something from her.
“Fuck you, this is private.” She flinched instinctively, waiting for a retaliation. When she didn't receive one she tried to sit up straight again, and noticed that her soulmate had gone quiet. “If I could explain, I would. But it's better if you forget me since I'm probably gonna die anyway.”
“I-I don't understand. I'm sure you're not gonna die, right? Just… it's gonna be okay, yeah? It will.” Sammy nearly groaned. She could tell that he probably thought she was just having a psychotic break or something, which as understandable as that was it was still incredibly frustrating.
“The bad man's name is Dr. Zorro Ryk—”
“That's enough of that.” Sammy cried out as she felt oversized fingers easily pry her hands apart, pinching onto her arm. Ryker was looking down at her with a cold gaze, his shadow enveloping her from above. “You are such an enigma, Sammy... I know you're a child, but sometimes you are so very intelligent and then you can be so incredibly stupid.”
“Let go!” She shouted, trying and failing to pull her arm away, staring at the fingers pinching it with a panicked gaze. Although the grip wasn't painful, it was still terrifying to feel something so large clamped around her limb. She knew that at any moment if Ryker decided to press down her arm would not work again.
“You— you got cut off again. I'm worried. Fuck, if I knew your name this would be much easier… Can you just tell me if you're okay? Please.” Sammy shut her eyes and shook her head— that soothing voice she had grown to enjoy now just tormenting her. Teasing her with what she knew she couldn't have.
It's always too good to be true.
“If you knew I was listening, why would you say that? Do you not have a brain in that tiny little body, hm? Because someone with a brain would not throw away their chances of communication so readily..!” He snapped, tone scolding and yet it still frightened Sammy enough to make her tremble.
“People who do not think are just corpses walking. Get that through your skull… What were you expecting to happen? No one is going to help you. Do you understand that? It doesn't matter if they know that name or not.” He growled. “Not only that, but you didn't even consider your soulmate's safety. You don't know the nature of how I'm listening. What if I knew who he was and killed him because of what you said?”
Sammy's face paled at that, tears welling in her eyes and blurring her vision.
“Don’t!”
His eyes narrowed at her, and although his frustration grew his fingers never once changed the amount of pressure on her arm. Sammy was too distressed to really notice that though, just trying to pull away again. The finger then moved, forcing her to stumble forwards with a yelp.
“Or what? You know you cannot stop me. How many times do I have to tell you not to make demands of people you can't handle yourself.” Sammy felt herself getting tugged forwards again, and her breathing quickened, really believing he was going to crush her hand or arm to prevent her from speaking to her soulmate again. She shut her eyes tightly.
“M-mum…” She whimpered under her breath as some tears spilled over. At the end of the day, it didn't matter how many years passed or how tough she liked to act or how many injuries she had acquired… She was still scared.
The grip on her arm suddenly disappeared and she lost her balance, immediately crumbling to the ground and burying her face into her arms, facing away from the doctor as she hiccuped. The silence only lasted a few seconds but it felt like minutes to Sammy…
Ryker cleared his throat.
“If you speak to him again, you will wish you never had. Understood?”
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navstuffs · 1 year ago
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BratTamer!Leon Kennedy with a SpoiledRichGN!Reader (warning: mild dubcon, SMUT SO MINORS DO NOT INTERACT)
author's notes: yes, i know i normally don't write about this, but really been in the mood lately for something like this. enjoy!
BratTamer!Leon Kennedy, who gets hired by your rich dad to be your bodyguard, but only on paper. The truth? Your dad is tired of your spoiled attitude and decided to hire someone to teach you some manners, though he was the one to spoil you in the first place.
BratTamer!Leon is hated by you at first sight. You don't like having someone around you as you try to spend your afternoons spending money and going to luxurious parties, especially when your friends are more attracted to hitting on him, always being stared at by his watchful blue eyes (when he isn't wearing those stupid sunglasses). Sure, he is attractive, but they can't see he is a pain in the ass, standing behind you with those dumb sunglasses and incredibly sexy blue suit?
BratTamer!Leon gets tired of your superior attitude toward everyone and is close to his limit. The last straw is when he sees you screaming at a poor young lady worker from a high-end store for simply bumping into you on accident, though she tried to apologize in a tearful tone. You don't notice Leon's eyes fill with rage as you scream about how incompetent the seller is, so the whole store hears as you humiliate her. This behavior from you ends today.
"You think you are better than everyone, don't you? Just because you are rich? Just because daddy gives everything to you? It is time someone teaches you some manners." BratTamer!Leon growls before shoving your mouth down his cock when you are back in the expensive car. You realize there is no resistance on your part, a little anger inside your belly, though Leon isn't forcing you down. You are doing it because you want it. "Look how well your lips are taking me. How long have you wanted this?" Fucking bastard.
BratTamer!Leon who vows to fuck you as you need if you behave nicely but punish you badly if you don't. At first, you roll your eyes, ignoring the desperate sensation of being with Leon again. But when a maid from your house breaks a glass cup accidentally, you start screaming at her, not because you care about the cup but because you want to know what kind of trouble Leon is talking about.
The sounds of the slaps on your ass probably echo to the house, but you don't care. At least your dad isn't home. BratTamer!Leon has you on his lap, your ass exposed. He makes you count every single one of the slaps and tears in the corner of your eyes, and he warns, "Do not lose count," you lose it "on accident" a couple of times. BratTamer!Leon is still nice enough to rub your ass when he thinks you've had enough, impressed by how much you took it.
But he keeps his promise. When you apologize to the worker for screaming at her (attracting many surprised stares from everyone), BratTamer!Leon returns late at night to your room and gives you exactly what he promised.
"Haven't been fucked like this in ages, haven't you? See what happens if you behave? I can give you much more than this." BratTamer!Leon grunts as he takes you from behind, grabbing your waist, not giving you time to breathe, every single pound hitting deeper inside of you. You want to tell him to go fuck himself, but he is taking you so good, so good, you can only sob a miserable no, begging to not stop.
Your whole demeanor changes. You become more polite, greeting those you always considered lower than you. Your dad is shocked, simply asking BratTamer!Leon, what it took. Leon smiles as he answers, "Just be firm, that is all."
But no one can change like that, and your brat personality comes out when you see a friend of your dad's hitting on your bodyguard during your birthday party. You honestly don't know half of those people, used to your dad using you for fame, but as you see those long red nails in BratTamer!Leon's dark suit, you bump into them with your wine glass before leaving.
He finds you on the balcony, his white shirt wet with wine, his suit jacket long forgotten. He is pissed, you are furious, and when he asks what that was all about, you tell him to go back and find someone else who he can have fun. And now you sound fucking stupid, with tears in your voice, turning around. You are hoping for him to punish you when you turn away, but when BratTamer!Leon's hand grabs your arm and turns you gently, his hand holding your face.
"Why would I want someone else if I only want you, bratty?"
BratTamer!Leon decides to give your birthday gift earlier. By bending you over the balcony, he suggests you stay quiet so no one looks up and sees how slutty you are. His face goes between your legs as he pushes his fingers inside of you. You hold back your moans, your legs trembling, and it doesn't take long until you whimper for him to stop teasing you and fuck in front of all those people to show everyone who you belong to. Not once does a single head rise despite Leon's grunts, occasional slaps in your ass, and the apparent noise of sex from the balcony. You still manage to keep quiet, even when he raises your leg so his dick can go even more deeper.
When you are done, BratTamer!Leon doesn't leave you like the other times. No, he helps you get to bed, helps clean your body's sweat, and cuddles with you. Leon simply shrugs when you ask him what your dad would think about him on your bed, replying maybe a little of your stubbornness rubbed on him.
"Really? You would blame this on me?" You wonder, pretending to be shocked.
"Why not? Everyone knows you are a bad influence. I might as well be the victim in all of this. Or he would thank me for giving you some manners."
"You really think really you have straightened me up, didn't you, Kennedy??" You tease, and he jokingly gives you a warning slap in your ass.
"We shall see this, brat."
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