#not get TOO too into. the in depths are only known by ppl i trust & thats that. & thats only if they ofc arent the type to judge.

[celestialmancer]

...Highkey was not. Expecting this one ramble I wrote of Ishtar to end up digging into some really personal vulnerabilities around my own.

...But. After several months of wanting to start opening the doors to rambling on these things (& chickening out) I finally. Got things down.

[greensaplinggrace]

honestly THANK YOU for saying all that abt baghra bc i thought i was going crazy from not liking her??? bc i haven't read the books and only summaries of them on wiki and like. i dunno why ppl like her actually even in the show bc this guy, her son, is like "i wanna make the world better for us grisha" and she's just like "no." even tho he sees that she's MAKING HERSELF SICK from suppressing her powers! she's literally like in bed coughing in the flashback yet seem much healthier at the little palace. also like after everything, after her disapproval, after the fold, after centuries of waiting for the sun summoner.. he never abandons her. he makes sure she's cares for. he doesn't harm her. and i have to wonder if baghra has ever thanks him for that, for just not leaving her alone. like i dunno how im suppose ro believe aleks is a heartless villain when he still cares for his abusive mom like this. like has baghra even told her she loved him (honestly she reminds me of a classic emotionally unavailable asian parent but maybe that's just me). also im wondering if baghra ever told aleks that he had an aunt.. bc like.. now that u bring up her isolating him it's like hmmmm...

not at me being like alina... why do u trust the bitter old woman who literally beats u with a stick and verbally abuses u every chance she gets.. just bc she showed a bad painting... like.. pls use two braincells to see that who u figured out as his mother... is also using his protection..

like baghra could've upped and left with alina. but no. she stayed bc she knew she was safe under aleks's protection.

alsoim just impressed that after his first friend tried to drown him and harvest his bones... he didn't go into hiding???? he still wanted to make a safe heaven for grisha!!! HE STILL WANTED TO PROTECT GRISHA EVEN AFTER HIS GRISHA FRIEND TRIED TO KILL HIM FOR HIS FUCKEN BONES. like... this is the guy im suppose to believe is the villain???

honestly i feel like part of the reason why LB's plotlines seem so bad and disconnected (and sometimes outright racist but that's another rant) and why darkles is disproportionately more violent and villainous in the later books is bc she didn't expect the darkling to be so popular and wanted to stick with her guns of making him the villain. but also wanted the money from aleks's popularity. but like you can't have ur cake and eat it too.

Well thank you for sending this ask! It's very sweet and very passionate. I'm glad you liked my post! I didn't put as much thought into it as some of my others lol. I kind of just talked. But it was nice to be able to finally talk about some of the problems I have with both her character and the fandom/author's perception of her.

HERE is the post this is referring to, in case anyone's wondering.

👀👀 You've hit the nail on the head for so many things, here!

Baghra is extremely emotionally unavailable, basically to the point of neglect. She's also verbally and physically abusive, traits which I doubt were only reserved for her students and not her son. Baghra claims she would do anything to protect him, but I've known a lot of parents who have that mindset and yet still harm their children because they think it's "good for them".

Aleksander stays at Baghra's side for years, and even when they're opposing each other she's never too far away from him. Idk if you've read the books but he does eventually hurt her. And as much as I don't like Baghra, I think his actions were horrid. But I'm also honestly kind of surprised it took him so long lmao.

Yeah I mean, in terms of isolation, let's not forget that she never wanted to introduce him to his father, either. Baghra's sense of eternity clouds a lot of her judgments on relationships, which means she views most people as dust and therefore teaches her son to as well. The problem with that is that he's a growing child, and he needs those social and emotional attachments for healthy development.

I would bet quite a bit of money that Baghra has either never told him she loves him or she has told him so few times it's practically forgettable.

And everything becomes more complicated because so many of Baghra's actions are understandable because of her life and her history, but the impacts they have on the people around her, especially Aleksander, are permanently damaging. And the fact that that's never gone over in critical depth in the books or how it's glossed over in fandom is just very disconcerting. Like, acknowledging Baghra's failings doesn't mean we're excusing Aleksander's actions, it just means we're holding Baghra liable for her own. Which the fandom should be doing, considering she's the epitome of an abusive parental figure.

And Alina trusting Baghra over Aleksander is even more confusing! Especially in the show!! This is the woman who beat her and abused her and tortured her friends when they tiny little children (and who probably still does so now that they're adults). This is the woman who mocks you and harasses you and insults you on a regular basis. Why does Baghra revealing she's Aleksander's mother make Alina change her mind?! Like fuck, I'd just feel bad for Aleksander. No wonder he kept it a secret, I would too! And that painting is enough evidence?! Really?! A random painting shown to you by this abusive mentor that's been making your life hell. That's what you're going to betray your new lover over?

The friends trying to harvest his bones thing is a good point, too. I think Aleksander, especially show Aleksander, is incredibly idealistic. I think he cares too much for others - those he's deemed worth his care (a sentiment given to him by Baghra). Despite everything she's tried to teach him about hiding and abandoning others and never caring and never doing anything to help or reach out or connect with people, Aleksander still continues to do so. It's likely because he never got it from Baghra growing up, and so is desperate for those emotional needs to be fulfilled elsewhere.

His turning point, when Baghra tells him it was understandable that those kids tried to kill him because the world is such a hard place for them - that's crucial. And the reason it's possible as a motivating factor is because of that idealism and that desire to help and that desire to be everything his mother isn't. Baghra tells him this trauma he just experienced was because of the oppression of his people, and instead of following her lead and accepting that, going into hiding and abandoning everybody to their misery, he goes I can do something about that. I can make it so this never happens again. Which is usually how trauma like that combines with one's core personality traits at a young age, especially when there's none of the essential support systems in place to aid in recovery (ie, the role Baghra should have been filling but wasn't, because she decided to exacerbate the problem instead).

And yeah, one of my biggest problems with the ham-fisted "beating you over the head with a sledgehammer of evil deeds" look-how-bad-this-character-is! portrayal of the Darkling in the later books comes from the impression I get that Bardugo doesn't trust her readers. She's so desperate to have us hate this character and think him an irredeemable villain, not trusting any of her readers to engage critically with a morally gray character, that it feels quite a bit like condescending fucking bullshit. Which ew, I know how to engage with literature, thanks.

She really does seem to look down on a large part of her fandom, and imo, the infantilization of the female characters in her books seems to carry over to her impression of most of her female readers as well. Which is why the Darkling's character arc gets fucking destroyed. But he's still a good cash grab, of course, so she'll shake his dead corpse in front of the fandom for money every time she wants something from it.

Also! Another reason I think her plotlines feel disconnected (I'm sorry Bardugo I respect you as a person, but shit-) is because the writing in SaB is just bad. I mean, nevermind the absolutely nauseating implications of the way she portrays the Grisha as a persecuted group who's situation is never actually fully addressed as it should be, considering Grisha rights is what her main villain is fighting for (imo for a series called the Grishaverse, LB seems to be pretty anti Grisha), but her characters and story alone are just wrong for each other. They don't fit together.

And the ending is one of the main pieces of evidence in that regard! You can’t say the ending where Alina isn’t Grisha anymore is her “going back to where she started” when she’s always been Grisha. She just didn’t know she was Grisha because she denied that part of herself that she was born with.

Alina is reluctant to move forward or change, she struggles with adapting, and she’s very set on the things she’s grown attached to throughout her life. She also has some latent prejudices against the Grisha, and so denies the possibility of being Grisha for those reasons as well.

Alina’s lack of powers in the beginning of her life because she willfully doesn’t learn about them to avoid change versus her lack of powers at the end of the book when she’s accepted them and then they’re stripped away from her by outer forces are two entirely separate circumstances. You can’t make a parallel about lost powers and lack of Grisha status bringing her back to the start when she was always Grisha and she always had powers and she simply refused to come to terms with it because of personal reasons.

The first situation is an internal conflict that indicates a story about growth and a journey of self acceptance. Denying herself the opportunity to learn about her heritage and to find acceptance with a group of people like her because she’s tied to the past and because of the way she was raised is the setup for a narrative that tackles unlearning prejudice and learning how to connect with a part of her identity that was denied her and learning how to grow independent and self assured. It’s the setup for a different story entirely. The second situation is an external conflict that centers around the ‘corrupting influence of power’... for some reason.

In a world where Grisha do not have social, political, or economic power and they are hunted, centering your heroine’s journey of self acceptance and growth around an external conflict about... the corrupting influence of power (in a group of people that don’t actually have any power?!) just doesn’t work. It is literally impossible to connect the two stories Bardugo is trying to push in Shadow and Bone without seriously damaging the main character’s developmental arc.

The only way a narrative like this would work, claiming that she has gone back to where she started, is either a) if the Grisha weren’t actually a persecuted group and instead were apart of the upper class, or b) if the one bad connection between the two instances is acknowledged - that Alina denied a part of herself crucial to self acceptance and growing up, and that losing her powers at the end has also denied her. It is a tragedy, not a happy ending.

Alina suffered because she didn’t use her powers. She grew sick. It was bad for her. This was not a resistance to 'the corruption of power and the burden of greed', it was her suffering because she couldn’t fully accept herself.

Framing the ending as a return to the beginning can’t be done if you don’t address how bad the beginning was for your main character. You brought her back to a bad point in her life. You regressed her. This should be a low point in her arc. It should be a problem that’s solved so she can finish developing organically or it should be something that is acknowledged as a tragedy in it’s own right, for the future the world (the writing) denied her.

This is a ramble and it makes no sense and I’m really sorry, but my point is that Bardugo put the wrong characters in the wrong story. The character arc required for organic development doesn’t match the story and intended message at all. The narrative doesn’t fit the cast. She's got two clashing stories attempting to work in tandem and she ends up with both conflicting messages that fans still can’t comprehend in her writing and an ending that doesn’t suit her main character to such an impossible degree that it’s almost laughable.

So yeah, there's a few reasons why I think the story and the plot feels so bad and disconnected. I hope you don't mind me making this answer so long! 😅 I was not expecting to write this much.

[dreaminginvelaris]

nessian analysis

im not sure if this qualifies as an analysis? It's basically me just explaining why I didn't like the nessian relationship, what it lacked, what sjm should have done.

I will be using the “anti-nessian” tag bc there are many softies here on Tumblr who get pissy whenever you have some things to say abt a beloved character or relationship that dont paint them as gods even though i dont hate them. I DO NOT hate nessian, I am not the biggest fan of them, im not entirely fond of them, I personally think we were robbed of a much deeper and flushed out relationship, but I do not hate nessian whatsoever. 

also please for the love of god don’t get butthurt and start talking about how feysand is the boring one, how feysand is so vanilla, in retaliation. stop. it makes you look childish. if you hate what i have to say abt your ship, move on. you don’t need to come on a nessian post and start talking about other ships. yes i realize i mention feysand, and rowaelin, but it was to compare how sjm usually writes her main couples.  

with that being said, let's move forward. 

sjm in the past has done an amazing job when writing romantic relationships. She's so wonderful at establishing a friendship, at establishing an emotional connection, before any romance takes place. like with rowaelin, we got to see rowan and aelin forge a friendship, from hating one another to respecting each other. before it was romantic love, it was friendly love first, it was love and respect for their friendship that made aelin threaten that bitch who i forgot the name of but who wouldn't stop touching rowan and aelin bathed her in fire until she stopped. it was the love and respect for their friendship that made rowan fight against his cadre to go save aelin, it was that love that made aelin go to maeve, threaten her ppl so Rowan could be free. 

all of this built up to the amazing relationship that is Rowaelin. it took establishing an emotional connection between the two to make what is their relationship now. the romantic/sexual part of their relationship is amazing as well, but it wouldn't have been amazing were it not for the trust their relationship was built on first. 

it's the same thing with feysand, their relationship built on trust first, on friendship, on emotional talks, on sharing their thoughts and feelings, on sharing hard truths with one another. on feyre trusting rhys with how she felt abt the whole tamlin situation, it built on rhys sharing his past, on sharing some of those horrific moments of UTM, it built on them fighting with one another, it's what made chapter 55 so amazing because it built up. it wasn't just sex right off the bat, it was forging a connection much more powerful than sex. 

which brings me to my main point, that nessian definitely lacks all of this. before it even starts, i know there are ppl who might say “but nessian was building during acomaf/acowar?”  yes, it was, we knew that there was something between them. but can you really call it an emotional build up btwn them? i mean we saw it through the eyes of feyre, so we didn't really see much of substance. we saw them exchange glances, nesta insult cass, cass tease nesta, even that one bonus chapter, but that wasn't enough buildup. because even in that bonus chapter we mainly just got to see cass corner nesta to a wall and learn how he was so turned on by her. nothing of depth and substance. 

you would expect sjm to bring this to their book. but it didn't happen. perhaps she as well thought that was enough of a build up to them, i wouldn't put it past her, her writing skills definitely are questionable in this book.

but where were the talks? where was nesta confiding to cassain abt her mother? abt her life being groomed for marriage? abt the years during the poverty, abt how she felt disgusted by herself for what she had done to feyre. for what she had not done for their family? for what she felt with her fathers death, how she felt abt elain, how she was coping?

where were the talks in which cassian confided in nesta? in where he talks abt his years in the illyrian camps, in what happened in those moments when he murdered a whole illyrian village, in which he learned he would never be able to bury his mother. the talks where he tells her how it felt to be separated from his brothers, how he felt when rhys was trapped, how it felt when feyre was taken, how it felt when he thought him and nesta were to die, at hybern and at the war. 

where was the teasing? the laughing? the pinning each other down during training, the talks during training. where was the friendship being built? just because cass tells nesta he was always her friend doesn't mean it’s not important to see it.

instead all we got was training and fucking and fucking and training. instead we got nesta jacking off cassian 200 pages in? i mean thats so out of character of nesta. this fiery woman who spent three books pushing cassian away, who made it known she ‘despised’ cassian, who made it clear she would not touch or even try to interact with cassian during her stay at the house of wind, but all of a sudden she just loses that and jacks him off? i mean the fact that nesta kept pushing cassian away was such a great opportunity for sjm to take and make it slow burn. teasing touches, never going too far but enough it made the other shiver. i mean that when the pinning each other down in training would have come in handy. but instead sjm just decided to change nestas character just like she changed cassians as well. 

(note: i am not slut shaming nesta, before any of y'all try to twist it that way, i am merely stating how in my perspective that was not something nesta would have done with cassian.

not to forget how cassian would literally leave nesta after their sexual encounters! please tell me i’m not the only one who notices that the cassian from acomaf/acowar/acofas would not have done that. this man has practically been in love with nesta since day one and he just straight up says “thanks for the ride” and leaves? uhhhh what? the cassian i knew and loved would not have done that. i mean him staying after those encounters would have been the perfect opportunity for them to have deep talks, for them to get to know one another. i mean they both claim to know each other, but do they really? 

the mating revelation was soo underwhelming too. i wanted passion, i mean thats what i was promised no? from both sjm and the nessian stans. so where was that passion during the mating revelation? i mean sjm had aelin realize rowan was her mate after rowan was shot, and she felt the fear of losing him. had rhys know fully when feyre was dying and he was trying to get to her. had ferye realize when they professed their love for each other, and she realized she had healed with him. even goddamn lucien and elain knew in such an intense way as well. and nessian? on a sidewalk. with cassian demanding nesta say it, and nesta robotically denying it. 

all im saying is that we were robbed. i like sex between two characters as much as the next person but sex doesn't matter unless there is a deep emotional connection between the two, its what makes chemistry between two characters amazing. 

also lets mention how cassian didn't even say i love you to nesta. PLSSS WHAT WAS THAT

the only part in the whole 700+ page book that actually felt deeper and much more stronger between the two of them was when nesta broke down and admitted she hated herself and cassian consoled her. but that was what? 3 pages and then they proceeded to continue to fuck during their “healing hike” nah that aint it

all im saying is that nessian was much more fun and sexy when it was through feyre’s perspective. 

[a-blu-jay]

In the light of the whole doomsday arc and chaos I think it's important to like,,, clarify ? Some points ppl r makin even tho theyre prob not gonna see it.

Also!! This is all /roleplay and talking about the characters not the content creators

Yes, everyone has fucked up. That's what they're ALL going for, especially the ppl takin the lead when it comes to the writin of the script. Everyone is a fucked up character and everyone is a good character with the exception of Dream.

Now to get some more in depth:

Let's start with c!Tubbo. Since the beginning he's been put into tight and bad situations. Watching his friends get exiled, being made a spy for the sake of Intel to win a war which is So Much Pressure, eventually fighting in said war, being made president of the revolutionized country but then immedietly having to rebuild it, later be manipulated to exile his beat friend and brother in arms etc etc. It's a lot of trauma and greif, it's not false to call him a child solider because that's exactly what he is. Schlatt was right, the moment he died the country was doomed, wether that be from Pogtopia, Technoblade, Dream or the inevitability that the leadership would fall onto Tubbo. He's not infallible and he's not experienced. He's a severely Traumatised teenager. But this doesn't necessarily make him a good person.

Next is c!Technoblade because I have some Opinions. He's a fucked up character. Just like everyone else, just in a more transparent way. A lot of the characters hide the bad things they've done in a way to preserve moral righteousness and such. Technoblade has always been clear and transparent he wants nothing more than anarchy, chaos and the fall of L'manburg. Now, acts of terrorism aren't good, they're pretty fucked up. The great thing about his character is that he's so goddman complex. Just like Tubbo and Tommy he's been wronged. And just like Tubbo and Tommy he's a hypocrite. That's what happens when you have morally grey and ambiguous characters. He made his intentions about anarchy clear and Pogtopia made their intentions about Governments clear, they both chose to ignore eachother which in the end made them Hypocrites. A specific point I want to make about Technoblade teaming up with Dream is that Tommy has NEVER been clear with Technoblade with how Dream treated him. Technoblade couldn't have known what Dream did because of Tommy's trauma about speaking about it and Dream's manipulation. Technoblade teamed up with Dream because they shared a common goal, he doesnt trust Dream and has voiced that before. Also! Tommy's point in their argument in the middle of Doomsday was really interesting, he said (I'm paraphrasing) "why can't you just let people love what they love." A thing to note is that Technoblade DID. After the end of the revolution he left to go live in retirment and solitude and let them fight amongst eachother and destroy eachother. The very same Government he predicted to be corrupt then tried to execute him without trial even though they said he'd be given one. Which is a pretty corrupt thing to do. In the end Technoblade was used and just a little bit mistreated but he's not in the right because of that. Again, he can be seen in the lense of a Villain but that doesn't mean he really is one.

Now onto c!Tommy. His character is deffinetly an interesting one! I think his main fault is his own hubris. He's prideful to a default and stubborn when it comes to the idea he could have done something wrong because of how badly he wants to be the/a hero. Now, I'm not saying he HASN'T taken accountability for some things he's said and done because he most certainly has and thus has grown as a character. Another huge fault is his hyperfixation on the emotions and people attached to objects. Honestly? Tubbo logically wasn't wrong, they're just discs. But in Tommy's head they're a symbol of his and Tubbo's friendship. The problem is when he picks these discs over his actual friendship with Tubbo and how Dream has manipulated him. Dream plays a BIG part in why Tommy thinks the discs are so valuable. If you're told enough times and manipulated into thinking objects hold a significant value to the things important to you then eventually they become fiercely important to you and have some weight to them. I think in the beginning, in Tommy's brain destroying the discs meant his and Tubbo's friendship was over because of the part they've played in their friendship. Again, Tubbo only ever saw them as dics, plastic vinyls that drop from mobs and play pretty music. To another point, Tommy is also explicitly Hypocritical, just like Technoblade. He holds onto the fact that Tubbo and L'manburg and it's people are his friends and he cares about him but then calls Technoblade his friend and casts his emotions aside. The problem is the blatant fact that Tommy used Technoblade as a weapon and after being called out that friends don't do that to eachother he ignores it. In this instance he's no better than Technoblade. A kinda big problem is his character development, which really doesn't have a lot to do with c!Tommy and more with how the writers suggest developing him as a character. I think the main thing is that he goes to Tubbo's side saying how the discs never truly mattered to later saying they need the discs. The discs don't matter. What matters is defeating Dream. But just like Tubbo, Tommy is a highly and incredibly traumatised Teenager.

Next is c!Ranboo, the mad lad! I don't really have a whole lot to say? Just some quick analysis of what his characters ideals are and his actions in everything. Looking at his character he's incredibly paranoid, anxious and probably Traumatised from things we the audience don't know. At the end of the day he's a true neutral character. In one of the tweets cc!Ranboo sent it said that as long as Dream isn't hurting the people he (character Ranboo) directly cares about, he doesn't care what Dream does. For a good portion he was against Dream because he cared about everyone nd dream was hurting everyone. He's joined Technoblade and Ph1lza in the Arctic because he thinks that Dream has gotten what he wants, he doesn't know anything about Dream and Tommy's conversation by the end of Doomsday. Also! Ranboo's ideals/beliefs are anarchist by nature and principle. The reason he has a problem with choosing sides between L'manburg and Dream is because of the hierarchy within those sides, and the obligation that you have to fight that comes with picking those sides. Technoblade and Ph1lza both chose to fight under free will and because they chose too without coercion. Everyone is equal there. There's a really good post somewhere talking about it that'll I'll look for that explains it very well. (EDIT: found the post also hopefully i did the link right)

This is getting painfully long so I'm wrapping it up here with a few last things. Everything has always come down to Dream. The reason L'manburg was built was to get away from the oppressive power that is Dream (another point for Technoblade teaming up w dream, he wasn't there for Dreams stuff, he only knew of Schlatt but I digress). Dream has manipulated everyone, he's running the puppet show with the strings tied to his fingers. He's manipulated Tubbo, Tommy, Ranboo, Technoblade, Schlatt, EVERYONE. He's pitted everyone against eachother because he loves the chaos. Because he knows that if they weaken eachother it'll be a lot easier to take control with less effort put in from his part. Dream has always been the main antagonist from the very very beginning. Sure some could say Tommy started it with the discs but Dream was the one who took them in the first place etc.

He's also pitted the audience against eachother. It's really interesting in how he's actually manipulated the audience. It doesn't matter who's on what side or who's wronged who when the cause for all their greif has always been Dream. The fandom is fighting over traitors and betrayals and villain arcs. It doesn't matter, not when Dream is runnin free with the amount of power that he has.

[dianaburnwood]

HITMAN 3: First Impressions

This post is full of SPOILERS. Also, it is LONG, so.... yeah. Be prepared lol 

HITMAN 3. Also known as: Diana’s Game. 

Dear GOD I am in love. 

I’m going to do my best to make this coherent. But. I am still freaking out. And I have SO much more to explore!!!! This won’t be very in-depth because I played each map exactly once so far. There’s so much left to see, conversations to overhear, opportunities to exploit - but, I DO have some first impressions, oh hell yes. 

Menu: 

That menu music!!! I was not expecting that at all. It was a mix of choral and classical with previous themes intertwined, and it reminded me of Blood Money. Speaking of Blood Money, this game is Blood Money. 

Dubai: 

Very, very beautiful. Kinda thought Grey made it all about himself lol of course he wanted to say “in your face” to the partners, but it was like 47 was just there to pull the trigger, like he’d not been hurt by them too. But, I really liked it. Trapping them in a room and watching them freak while Grey watched me kill them?? Helloo??? Popping off HARD from the start and I love it.

So - here’s the thing. I don’t get the timing. Diana tells them then that Edwards escaped. Did he escape just before the boys got to Dubai? Or were they unavailable to reach until then? It seems that the message Grey got at the end of HAVEN was after Olivia hacked the HAVEN servers, and then the boys were out of reach so after Diana discovered Edwards was gone, she couldn’t tell them until Dubai? And it was shown to us in a different order to leave us hanging? I dunno. Maybe? It seems weird. 

THE CUTSCENE here omg - once again establishing that 47 and Diana are ride or die. “Diana will make it right, she always does” - BABE. BABE. SWEET BOY. His little face when Grey doesn’t trust Diana. OMGGG.

Dartmoor: 

I went the murder mystery route, of course. I figured it was Emma from her conversation with her husband, but I got all the clues after just to be sure. Can’t believe Carlisle just handed 47 the file on Edwards and then went out alone on the balcony like I wasn’t gonna kill her??? Bitch????? do you forget who i am?????? Anyway, the murder mystery was SO much fun, but I can’t wait to infiltrate this manor in other ways. Lots of Beldingford vibes here.

THE CUTSCENE bdsfgafhlsjfah WAHT????? Ok so HOW did Edwards know where they were? And - ok, so it made for an amazing scene, but Grey is a badass. He is a mercenary genius that duped the ICA and brought Providence to its knees. How did he get himself surrounded in the woods by CICADA? But he did, and it was beautiful, and he literally only shot himself to save 47, and the LOOK in 47′s eyes on his balaclava face - I just bfjKSFasad. I can’t believe he died so early tho. I was very sure he’d die somehow, but SO early. WOW. 

Berlin:

fucking hell. Berlin. fuck. fucckkkk. 

I wanna shout out to Mini (not gonna tag you in case you’re avoiding spoilers) but hot damn girl if you’re reading you were BANG ON about 47 wearing Grey’s coat. I really didn’t think it was his. It was. It is such a beautiful way for 47 to express his emotions about this death without actually saying anything. Omg. It was perfection. I’m crying thinking about it.

BERLIN was where this game really upped its... game. Like WOW. 5 targets, and it’s the ICA. Clearly Edwards went to the ICA board at this stage and was like uhhhh so you need to take these ppl out. HOWEVER I am amazed that the ICA is like “oh, ok”. DO you not remember what happened in SOUTH DAKOTA. 

But going after the ICA is a fucking trip and I love it. I love how 47 says each agent’s name to himself. I love how he listens in and the team handler realises it. I love how she pulls the rest of her team out once you get 5. I love that the ICA agents use disguises too!!! This is truly APEX PREDATOR and I love that they named it that. Y’all think you have the balls to go up against 47??? bitch?????

But the fact that you have to find the targets and none of them are marked is so fantastic. I found 6, but I have no idea how many are actually available - but I’m gonna find out!!! The club is HUGE as well, and lots of throwbacks to Contracts, especially with the biker gang. Amazing. Amazing level. I’m so excited to replay it. 

Also they really addressed the elephant in the room with the ICA agents describing 47 as a caucasian male, bald, average height and ppl being like uh that’s every man here, and then he said yeah but he’s got this big tattoo lmao 

Chongqing

ok this is where I started to think this game was my fanfiction. Inside the ICA? Showing off how truly international it is, and high tech. Hidden in plain sight. Ready to dismantle in 12 hours if needed. SO perfect. This lore builds on Absolution and Blood Money ICA lore in wonderful ways. 

Also, I don’t know why the IOI and DK of the logo looked different in the trailer, they must have been just hard to make out. Cos in the game, the ICA logo is the same as all previous games. 

Also, analysts do client vetting? Intrigue. Always assumed that was part of the handlers’ job. I take it all back Diana, you have never done anything wrong in your life, ever 

I killed Royce by firing the ppl she recommended so she’d get trapped in the data core cleaning. I killed Hush (what a name I love it) as his patient. 

Working with Olivia is really fun. I missed Diana, but Olivia brought a whole fresh perspective. I also really like how neither Grey nor Olivia are as good as Diana - they both fucked up while guiding 47 at least once. 

47 saying “...I will leave you to prepare” to Olivia, I yelled fdagsfa

Also I love how 47 decided to expose the ICA exactly like Diana did in Absolution. Those two. One of a kind. My heart. And his desire to protect her. I love that the files showed their start together. Olivia saying “I can see why you...” and then she stopped herself. We all KNOW what she was gonna say. 

AND AND AND AND 

the cutscene - I screamed

“47 has one weakness. Me.” 

I swear to fucking GOD, IO has seen into my soul. I’ve said all along that Diana is 47′s weakness, and he is hers. But to hear it said, aloud, by my girl? WHAT???!!!!!

Mendoza

Ok. OK. OKKKKKK. OK. I can’t even write about this one. This was where I was pretty sure I was hallucinating the entire level. This is my Diana and 47 dreams come true. This is insane. This is EVERYTHING.

So we have OUR MOMENT IN THE SUN. She puts her HAND on HIS HAND and he looks in fucking wonderment at it. ahugarhiewEG;FEJGHEFlejlhsgfes;gjrsgt. I can’t. I can barely get through writing about this. 

Diana - the dress, the Jolie thigh slit, the jewellery, the hair (they finally fixed her fucking hair), SASS. “I have tango fever” omg. 

How do these ppl not have a pic of 47 by now lol 

I followed Diana and Vidal around cos I was entranced by my girl. Diana was fucking amazing each time. So much sass. Little did I know I interrupted them enough times for Vidal to say “ok son let’s talk”. I saw the tango and I was like omg imagine if I could dance with Diana. 

well.

WELL. 

Anyway, got to kill Vidal via her own setup for me, and that was amazing. I wasn’t expecting it at all. I snuck into the house to kill Yates, and overheard him calling Edwards’ voicemail. Also, it is April 2021?? So, yeah. My previous dates were way wrong lol. 

And then, ALL MY DREAMS CAME TRUE. Diana and 47 fucking dancing the tango? I was pissed that I was in a security guard outfit, next time I play he will be in his tuxedo baby. 

Diana’s comments to 47 when he’s in disguise tho, I was freaking. As security “you look like a true professional. I feel so much safer with you gentlemen around” aaahhhh

UH HE FELL TO THE GROUND COS OF POISON fngjfagfljgnsdfa

I am so glad I was right about my baby girl tho. She even told him “you didn’t have a choice” about her parents. Good. I’m so glad I was right about that. But omg it broke my heart to have 47 so, SO, SOOO sure of Diana all along, defending her to Grey and Olivia, knowing, KNOWING that she was on his side, and then, he eventually started to doubt it. 

I was screaming at my screen - this is BLOOD MONEY! SHe is doing what she did in BLOOD MONEY!!!!

But, for a second, 47 wasn’t sure anymore. And Diana played her part well. 

Carpathian Mountains

Ok, what I love most about Contracts was how it gave us an insight into 47′s psyche, and this game upped that tenfold. Him seeing all his targets surround him? Him imagining Diana and the Constant dancing together? Him imagining her say terrible things about him, things he’s thought about himself deep down, always, omg, but he finally snapped out of it. Ironic that thinking about Grey snapped him out of it, when in life Grey had not trusted Diana. But 47 came to the realisation on his own. Diana would never betray him. 

opening that door and finding out you’re on a fucking train?????? I screamed. 

I am a bit disappointed that it turned out Romania wasn’t significant, they just happened to be passing through. But omg the fact that you are “subject 47″ again. I freaked. This is 47′s worst nightmare. 

I love that you have a free pass to kill everyone in this level. I did it in stealth anyway, cos it felt wonderfully tense to sneak through that train. But wow. This is another BIG risk that IO took. The train was straight out of Uncharted, and crafting a silencer for your pistol??? Hello The Last of Us????? But I don’t care. They used those elements super well. 

I think some people will be angry at this game because parts of it (especially the last level) were a departure from how HITMAN and HITMAN 2 worked. But I love it. I love that they took risks to tell the story they wanted to tell, and those risks paid off. 

47′s undying loyalty to Diana, omg. Telling Edwards bye bitch, I’ll never forget who I am again, and Diana thinks you suck. <3<3<3<3<3

ENDING

OH MY GOD. ONE YEAR LATER????? 47 obviously took some time off cos he fucking needed a break. But he’s back, baby. Ending on “it’s good to be back” was wonderful. The game ended where the 2015 trailer for HITMAN started, and I’m crying. He’s ready to continue with Diana, and not because it’s what he was made to do, not because he doesn’t know what else to do, but finally, because he CHOOSES to do that. 

But one year later? What does that mean? Has Diana rebuilt the ICA like in Blood Money, or will she and 47 work together without anyone else? They’ll need the infrastructure that an organisation like the ICA has though. Diana said she would dismantle Providence from the top down once Edwards was gone, but how? Does that mean dismantling what’s left of the ICA? They were one and the same by the end of the game. All that didn’t just disappear. I’m left with so many questions. 

I was disappointed Diana wasn’t in the cabin when 47 got there. And I wonder why she wasn’t. She knew he was coming, but they are clearly still on good terms. Maybe she wasn’t sure what to expect. But does that mean they hadn’t spoken in a year since??? But she didn’t sound surprised to hear him, and he had coordinates that he was following, so I think they arranged to meet. But her phone was in there when he arrived, and she wasn’t. Maybe he was tracking her phone? Did she come back there to him after????? 

BUT BUT BUT BUT BUT BUT 

the game 

ended

with 47

smiling 

And for that I will be forever grateful. 

Ok bye, I need to play it again. RIP work tomorrow lol 

[casswithmywholeheart]

What was your opinion on Gothel being Cassandra's mother?

Well.... I know there's a lot of controversy on it and I've heard some ppl say that the show went too far, but I personally think it was a good plot twist for the story. Cassandra being Gothel's biological daughter was actually the centerpiece of the whole season (the whole SERIES, perhaps,) and was one of the main points that made this show truly amazing. Cassandra's appearance-her black curly hair and hazel eyes(and ofc her bewty)-resembles Gothel a lot from the beginning, so even though it was a shocking twist, it was still convincing enough.

Also, Cassandra had shown a lot of scenes where she felt like her destiny had been taken away by someone else and felt like always being in a second-place, especially ever since the presence of Rapunzel.

In that case, the concept of her being Gothel's abandoned daughter and her place having been replaced by Rapunzel was an extension of those feelings she felt all the way through season 1~2, and when she had finally known the truth of the past, those feelings just exploded. It does make sense. That truth she saw in the house of yesterday's tomorrow was the answer-the important key to Cassandra's character and why she had turned against Rapunzel. It gave us reasons and made us nod our heads on her betrayal. By revealing that truth it was not only understandable why she had felt inferior to Rapunzel all this time, but also it showed us validity that their ill-fated relationship had originated far back when they were babies. That their rivalry and opposition in season3 were unavoidable fate and were meant to be.

Plus, it also succeeded in letting people more empathize on her and feel sorry for her, giving the character more liveliness and making her more relatable.

But still what I am disappointed about is that the show only ended up making Cass a pathetic poor villain, and nothing else more. Cass in s3 could have shown more depth in character; I'm sure they could have developed her character more into a complex, attractive villain who is in an inevitable love-and-hatred relationship with the princess. ..However, instead, they ended up turning her into a kind-hearted idiot who keeps making stupid decisions throughout 3 whole episodes (ToTS, once a handmaiden, and plus est en vous) and that did no development in her narrative at all. It only ruined it. Cass's story- her being abandoned by mother, not being trusted by her stepfather, always being overlooked and ignored by the carravan gang, and not being able to have a chance to prove herself, EVERYTHING they have succeeded in building up all the way through season 1~3, had collapsed pathetically in the last few episodes. They clearly have failed in consummating Cass's complex character, 🤦‍♂️and that's what I feel sad about as a Cass fan and the series' fan. I do understand it was hard for them to give more depth to her story considering that it is a children's show after all. It is true that it might have gone too dark for kids if they had developed the plot more.

So that's why it's understandable but still sad at the same time. It could have really been a legendary show of all time if they did more to Cass's development as a villain.

Yet, still there are many talented writers and artists in the internet who continue to create their own development on Cassandra, and I believe that ironically, the deficiency of the show is what made possible for so many artists to get inspirations from and make such interesting fan-creations and awesome AUs based on the original.

So, yes, that's what I think for now.

Thanks for asking!

[mvtteo]

YES, i know i’m so late to the game - pls fight me :/ - but i’m here now & i cannot wait to write w/ all of u & love on all of u, etc !! i’m stef btw !! ok now on to the stuff yall came here for.

☆★ [ tommy martinez + he/him + cismale ] ☆★ did you know that [ matteo de la cruz ] has lived in erie for [ two months ] now? the [ 26 ] year old [ dealer / uber driver ] is known to be [ loyal ], yet [ calamitous ]. which is fitting considering they are a/an [ scorpio ]. whenever they pass by on the street, i can hear [ save me from myself by louis the child ] blasting through their headphones. they remind me of [ a flickering street light in an alley, dirt stuck under your fingernails & a meme that isn’t funny anymore ], and it really wouldn’t be erie without them! [ stef, 21, est, she / her ].

( TW : drug use, abuse, violence )

FORMING

from toronto originally ! he’s only been in erie for about two months ( and who KNOWS how long that’ll last ... more info on that below )

he grew up in a single parent home ( his biological father SLAMMED the door in his face at 4 years old & never returned ), of course a part from the revolving door of ‘ new daddy’s ’ his mother would introduce to him as he grew. money was tight but they made due, a working/lower class family living in an area of the city that was known as a spot tourists shouldn’t visit. 

a lil bit about his mother : emillia vargas ! she took odd jobs when she could & that’s how she put food on the table. that, or her boyfriend of the month dishing out from his wallet. sometimes it was shocking - to have food in the fridge - when at least half of her paycheck was sent to a dealer on the corner. she was from a long line of addicts & didn’t make it to the other side. matteo’s earliest memories are of needles — and the worst was the silence afterwards. their relationship is COMPLICATED to say the least. for some reason, despite everything, he still cares & checks up on her. probably because she’s the only family he knows. or the guilt trip & manipulation she’s thrown his way — that, too! anyway. they don’t talk often & she’s still at the same house up in toronto.

father : the man left when matteo was just four. fighting was constant ( so perhaps it was due to trouble in paradise ), but matteo was too young to really comprehend why he left & he hates pondering on it - even though the lasting effects are REAL. 

anyway. his mother did have her fair share of boyfriends, trying to fill in that void - but to no avail. some of these men were dangerous, some using emilia, some married already, others abusive & controlling, addicts themselves ... needless to say, no one really stuck. and matteo definitely had a part in that too, being spiteful, causing fights or fighting back. things got pretty bad @ his place & the neighborhood knew whose house those red & blue lights always visited.

SPEAKING of his neighborhood, one great thing did come out of it & that was not too far around the corner lived @luzzamaya​ , matteo’s BEST FRIEND / ride or die / partner in crime. he practically lived @ her house, looked up to her father as the male figure in his life & they’re still two peas in a pod today :~)) ... but more on that later too ...

matteo grew up QUICKLY - not really in the way of caring for himself ( bc his actions would in fact prove the opposite ) but he often hung out with people way older than him ( not really wanting to be home after school, etc ) & he began diving into the world of drugs early on. def the kid your parents would’ve been 👀👀 about. YALL CATCH THE DRIFT OK ... moving on.

IMPORTANT BLURB TO HIS STORY (TW : mention of gang violence )

so he was always in the wrong crowd / hanging with kids older than him / he got involved with drugs etc really young. he started selling drugs lowkey around high school + the town and was a lowball dealer until he continuously proved himself + being more closely tied to this GANG ( the suppliers ), we can call it La Línea bc i looked up active gangs and this one was made from corrupt / retired police officers so i was like .. YUP ! so he’s currently affiliated, not initiated bc that prob means killing someone nd he’s like miss me w that, fool. but as he’s grown his relationship with them + has continued selling (drugs, weapons .. contraband etc), they want him in bc they trust him. giving him more & more duties. and it’s not like he can say NO bc they’re all strapped + can literally ruin/end his life ?? or ruin/end the lives of the ppl around him? SO as another gang (aka a MAFIA) that is trying to step on la linea’s territory … ( maybe it had bad consequences, someone from la linea being thrown in prison or dead ). SO they trust their outside dude matteo (since he’s not super recognizable to the mafia since he’s not u know . FULLY in la linea) to work a plan to take DOWN this mafia. how ? buy ratting them out to the police. a literal snitch smh. the only bad thing is now … someone from the mafia traced the words back to him. their leader is now in prison & has sent “”soliders”” to come after matteo nO MATTER WHAT. he’s gotten threatening calls // he’s been forced into fights // held at gunpoint which was his FINAL straw of being like ..  I GOTTTA GO

soooooo now they’re ( him & luz ) are in erie :~). 

also i’m thinking he got involved w the gang bc originally he owed other low-level dealers money + was like trust me on this. i’ll do whatever u ask. nd is a loyal ass hoe. plus all of a sudden he was making DOUGH selling product + had a following / a lil bit of a “”community”” that he’d never rly had before

PERSONALITY / HEADCANONS ( idk how to label - just some more info )

he’s not a horrible dude but a LOT of people would argue that he is. and his actions might seem like he is. but ... he’s learning :,)

sarcastic as hell

has an infamous smirk ok ... super careless so yall are gonna see that a lot

has a rooted issue with authority figures & hates when anyone tells him / offers him / suggests to him what to do

despite seemingly coming across as a meanie, he could also be considered the life of the party. not in the sense of being gregarious, but more so having FUN. drowning out 

immature as hell 

has definitely dealt to his mother before :/. a low, even for him, but. that’s a complicated relationship

his hair is constantly a mess

STREET FIGHTS FOR MONEY $$$ or when la linea previously made him. he tries not to do it TOO often but sometimes he’s just gotta ya know ?

has some shitty tattoos - minus the ones done beautifully by luz of course !! a few to cover some scars :|

assume scruff on his face at all times

has been struggling with sleeping through the night, nervous abt getting caught & will often just walk around @ 3pm for a smoke

loves reggaeton 

bilingual but hardly speaks spanish :/

WANTED CONNECTIONS 

a SPONSOR from AA/NA

a COP / law enforcement that takes him in for dealing

or even a bystander that calls in authorities for him dealing / stealing / anything illegal ...

someone he DEALS to

someone who OWES him money

a FLIRTATIONSHIP 

a ROOMMATE

a BARTENDER/CONFIDANT @ his go-to watering hole

a GOOD INFLUENCE who is aware of his addiction 

a PASSENGER in one of his uber rides

someone he got into a CAR ACCIDENT with

they hit him in the middle of the night // or hit his car ? or vice versa ?

someone he had a BAR FIGHT with

next door NEIGHBOR

ENEMIES

always wanted to do a homewrecker plot tbh

a revenge plot ?

someone he’s met from a DATING APP

a COUSIN

another CLUB RAT

ok i’m literally open to ANY connection u think of. it might be easy to come up w/ those in-depth ones while brainstorming tg but above are just a few ideas :,)))

[nocvil]

hewwo cuties !! im bon or bonbon or bonners u kno it !! im here to bring u my tsundere bitch of a boy bogum who is played by the wuvewy joohoney ( f in the chat for his mental health i love my Husband ?? ) !!  bogum or bo is a hitman who also takes care of his cute and lovely mother that lives with him in his apartment. below the cut i will explain him some more about him but bc of possible triggers, i won’t go too in depth. if you wanna know more about him, i have links on his blog ! onward !

tw: mentions of parental death, injuries, and elderly illnesses.

( lee jooheon + cismale & he/him ) ʟᴏᴀᴅɪɴɢ ɴᴇᴡ ᴀᴘᴘʟɪᴄᴀᴛɪᴏɴ … soo bogum is applying for unit 11. it says here they’re twenty-six and are a hitman. i guess they’ve lived in seattle for six years and i swear i’ve seen them around the market only browsing and never buying like every scorpio i know. they spent most of our tour on google news and i thought i kept hearing the amity affliction playing softly from their phone. i wasn’t sure they’d apply because before they left all they said was, “ i’m not sure if this’ll work out for us. ” ♡ penned by bon, 22, est, they/he

uhhh fair warning i’m reusing his intro from his previous group but it will be edited to fit !

soo bogum or bo i guess. twenty-five / 25. cismale. he/him. hitman and caregiver to his 52 year old ill ridden mother.

he has been in seattle with his mother for 6 years after moving away from seoul at the age of 20 to get away from the short crime life he lived there and also to kind of get a fresh start after his father’s passing. his mother was paralyzed at the waist down and the event was most likely what led into her starting to get very mild dementia.

a little insight on his mom is that basically she is never seen without bogum although bogum can be seen without her. i like to believe she is pretty well known just because bogum likes to get her out to socialize with everyone, although what degree people know her is up to whoever. she is super sweet lady when she is focused and on track and loves to socialize, meet new people, and hang out anywhere with her son. bogum is her caretaker, basically, providing her with everything she needs in order to survive.

bogum projects an outward appearance and personality of a guy who is caring, kind, and would do almost anything for someone he likes or trusts. but he can also be that guy who kinda freaks you out if you catch him at the wrong time. overall he is definitely an everyday guy who just has these weird flaws. everyone can be kinda creepy at times (:

his “official” personality written on his stats page is this:

a living oxymoron. bogum can be the sweetest person you’ll meet and also the creepiest man you’ve ever been approached by. he has a winning smile and would help almost anyone in need, but also wouldn’t hesitate to let you know he can’t stand you or he doesn’t like you. most people might see bogum as a caring person given the devotion he has to his mother and he pushes his personality that way. bogum really is a kind person, he always will be, but he is also someone who could really care less. while he is outwardly sweet, it is also not very hard to catch him off guard. if you asked someone about him, they would probably say that he is a devoted individual, but there is something off about him that is hard to put a finger on.

he is pretty set in stone because i’ve wrote him a few times. he was 1000% inspired by investigation discovery ( i mean his url is from a show on there )  and you can check out some of his pages on his blog. he has a stats page and an insight page that explains stuff that might be more triggering. i might make him a plots page. idk. probably not bc im a mess jasldkf.

speaking of, some plots i would luuuuuv for him are past friends from hometown seoul, perhaps a best friend?, someone who thinks he is fishy, someone who helps take care of his mom, anyone who could be his neighbor could have a cute plot, one sided romances ( bogum is aromantic, please keep in mind ), and idk, really almost anything. i’m not too picky as long as you respect his occupation and sexuality.

also a lot of ppl tended to love having plots with his npc mom so i mean feel free i guess LMAO

i would also like to say that i know his occupation may be triggering and because of this i don’t plan on really writing anything too detailed out unless the mun is comfortable and it is tagged and under a read more (: i respect that nobody rlly wants this scary shit on their dash because i wouldn’t either if i wasn’t playing someone like this. please don’t let his occupation keep you from plotting with me though ; ~ ; there is so much more to him than his job. he doesn’t go out hitting people 24/7, he rlly leads a pretty normal life.

i can’t wait to plot with you guys !!!!!!  let’s fuckin’ go !

[ssaalexblake]

star wars spoilers

ros spoilers

move onnnn

like actual proper major spoilers and i’m making this intro long in case mobile decides to hate read mores today

... 

...

Anyway like, i am a Shallow sw viewer who isn’t actually likely to kick up a fuss abt what i didn’t like in any serious way even tho i got issues, But i wanna say what i really liked b/c?? there were moments in that movie with themes i Loved and i don’t wanna be negative nancy for this franchise because i am actually incapable of taking it seriously tbh no matter how wtf or wild it is and i just Gotta;

First of all. The entire franchise was worth Rey it for calling Leia Master. 

like, they added her in best as they could, which wasn’t fabulous but i can’t really say how they’d work their way around that tbh so i’m not gonna rag on abt the Leia plot But god they proper confirmed she was a Legit Jedi thank u V much.

Chewie!!! Got!!! his!!! medal!!!

they put porgs in the movie, it was my only request and i recieved. i am content. 

also the effects on old palps were Incredible and Creepy and!!! props to the vis effects teams

also s/o to the choreographer who planned out rey’s fighting style to look like gymnastic tumbles but with a murderous glow stick. love it.

idk what extended sw canon now says about force powers being able to heal But the old eu book shatterpoint is one of my faves and i loved the inclusion that Rey can just like. Heal. 

also lol i heard daisy ridley on the radio this morning and she was supposed to be requesting songs to air but didn’t know the names of them and i have Never related to anybody more than i did in that moment. 

look ok, that rey and kylie could literally fight each other when not in the same room was Really Cool ok

tho i would have Paid to have seen the pov of an outsider while they had lightsaber battles from miles away tbh b/c that would have been Wild

i had one Horrified moment where i thought the ‘rise of skywalker’ thing was a Pun about kylie dragging his ass up from that hole and u have No Idea how thankful i was @ the Rise sequence

also i, a massive mace windu fan, was Ecstatic his voice was present in the proceedings

which were A) tacky and B) Abdolutely my favourite thing ever. 

it’s a space opera ok i am allowed to Want to be here for the tacky heartwarming shit

‘is that the navy??!?!?!?!?@ ‘ no sir... it’s.. .People’ was one of the funniest yet heartwarming sequences in anything ever ngl

HORSE WARTHOGS

inexplicable lin manuel miranda cameo

rey’s temper explained due to the fact that she is related to... Vilanelle

and look ok, i Always hated the idea of Rey being related to the skywalkers and Any crap meta that she had to be family for it to Count properly. It was an insult to found family, any form of adoption etc etc and i am.. Actually very mollified by this familial turn of events lol. It has a certain symmetry. and sw is literally built on the idea that history repeats but... different. 

i was’t against rey being related to anybody, i just didn’t want her to be a skywalker because like... she was gonna Be a skywalker b/c legacy isn’t about blood, and uh... least i was right. i am naturally happy abt this. 

also when i watched tlj the first time i was CONVINCED at the end of the movie she’d raise luke’s x wing from the depths as yoda did for luke in esb, and was Super off put that i was wrong. I was not wrong just... my timing was off. luke rose the x wing for her. ur yoda now luke. deal with it. 

the other ex storm troopers who laid down their weapons!!! all of them!!! fin is not alone, they only have power by making you think you are alone!!! 

i Really loved that thematic thread btw

also richard e grant’s performance was actually kind of chilling

but i am glad that i can still happily say that every character in sw Is a total unmitigated idiot. All of them. Stupid. Idiot rights. Yes, this is a plus point. 

i also liked that it’s Kind of obvious hamill and ford picked up slack for what Would have been carrie’s scenes??? Like, it’s horrible she’s not there but they obviously care to do that in her stead. it’s sad but makes you smile. 

as much as i’m not a kyle fan and never will be, and as much as i am not a fan of the ship, i can’t say there there weren’t decent thematic threads around the rey and kylie plot. Her symbolically killing kylie in a fit of rage, actively actually rising to his bait, realising as luke did in the roj climax that she had let the dark side get the better of her But having the power to take that Back and heal him and Stop even after she’d done something. It’s like the originals but not. And so, kylo is dead and Solo walks again. Was this plot My thing? No. But i appreciate the symbolism of him being stabbed through the stomach like he did to Han, and i appreciate the contrast of her actions after doing that versus His after he did it. What a difference. 

i said this wasn’t a complaint post but u wanna know the worst part abt the movie??? how cheap the sith dagger looked. surely u can do better than that???

anyway, 3po’s red eyed when he translated the sith was hilarious tbh. 

also hilarious: sw’s response to hiring Another brown haired white lady was to Only show her eyes in a way that was Incredibly conspicuous and was therefore unintentionally hilarious. 

Finn is Explicitly force sensitive now and it’s over for y’all 

wedge!!!

like... the sith amphitheater???  with the ghosties of all sith past (i think??? my interpretation anyway) was Genuinely creepy??? 

this is a Bit of a side note, but Luke was Perfectly in tune with tlj luke??? Because tlj luke changed tune before the end of That movie when he gucci booted his astral ass to distract kylie, him Saying his fear was wrong was merely verbal confirmation of what was portrayed in tlj. really. That’s not them backing away from tlj, it’s afffirming it. 

i really loved that hux just got That death. I liked  that while he Was used for ridiculous comic relief, the narrative did not forget he was just straight up evil. 

L A N D O

that i all. that’s the point. just lando.

sheev palpatine’s late entry for Shittiest parent/paternal figure in the sw universe Was at the eleventh hour but by god did he give it his all to win the competition. 

things only relevant to cm fans: they killed kate callahan’s husband!!! :((((

critics are slamming them for like, hardly killing anybody but I for one am happy they didn’t go grimdark and just went. Fuck it, we’re gonna keep being bullheadedly optimistic and most everybody lives, deal with it.

s/o to that gay moment that lasted like 2 solid seconds but i’d have preferred it if she’d been like, making out w/ chewie tbh.

that hug!! the trio hug!! my ot3!!! that i am even more convinced would Properly work as an ot3, too btw. Poe spent the whole movie jealous finn is into Rey, while confused abt it b/c He’s also kinda into Rey in that han/leia Tension kinda way, but Finn is also into Poe but not in the Puppy way he is with Rey, in the ‘i am so in love w/ you i don’t realise it but i trust you with the world’ kinda thing and Rey also has the Tension thing w/ Poe and would do anything for Finn but she’s like... Busy. B/c like, unfortunate family reunions and the awkwardness of being a millennial Actually offered a decent job that your morals do not allow you to take and the crisis that leaves u with. 

anyway what i’m saying is the ot3 is Sailing in my head. look how it ended!!! Sailing. 

however, i would like it known that the lady at the end Should have heard the word skywalker and Run for the hills. missed a chance. 

But also Rey Did find that family of hers Maz told her she’d get ahead of her!!! i hate how many ppl say that was dropped or forgotten. like wtf??? what are finn and poe and chewie and bb8 and 3po and all the army of droids that love her and all the resistance that does too??? Luke and Leia??? y’all obsessed with blood when it comes to sw. She’s got her family. 

now i Could make a complaints post but i just... I’ll leave that to everybody else and their mothers for now bc they’d be better at it anyway. I liked This stuff. Except for that point about the dagger. that sucked. 

[comicteaparty]

September 2nd-September 8th, 2019 CTP Archive

The archive for the Comic Tea Party week long chat that occurred from September 2nd, 2019 to September 8th, 2019.  The chat focused on Home is a Distant Wish by Jurinova.

Featured Comment:

Chat:

RebelVampire

COMIC TEA PARTY- WEEK LONG BOOK CLUB START!

Hello and welcome everyone to Comic Tea Party’s Week Long Book Club~! This week we’ll be focusing on Home is a Distant Wish by Jurinova~! (https://tapas.io/series/hiadw)

You are free to read and comment about the comic all week at your own pace, so stop on by whenever it suits your schedule! Remember, though, that while we allow constructive criticism, our focus is to have fun and appreciate the comic. Below you will find four questions to get you started on the discussion. However, a new question will be posted and pinned everyday (between 12:01AM and 6AM PDT), so keep checking back for more! You have until September 8th to tell us all your wonderful thoughts! With that established, let’s get going on the reading and the chatting!

QUESTION 1. What has been your favorite scene in the comic so far? What specifically did you like about it?

QUESTION 2. Given many of the characters deal with some sort of trauma, whose trauma stands out to you the most? What do you think the comic can show us in regards to how we deal with trauma in real life?(edited)

RebelVampire

QUESTION 3. At the moment, who is your favorite character? What about that character earns them this favor?

QUESTION 4. Do you think the Keld Ores can be trusted, or was Angelo right about him being dangerous? Why do you think Mute is sheltering him, and what consequences will the others face for bringing him to Mute?

RebelVampire

QUESTION 5. What has been your favorite illustration in the comic so far? What specifically about it do you like?

QUESTION 6. Who do you think Roara is accused of having killed, and what does this have to do with her ex? How do you think she wound up friends with Cane, and what do you think her role in the story will be now that she’s free?

RebelVampire

1) my favorite scene is probably the couch scene where Angelo and Kipu were getting intimate. It was nice to see this sort of character development since it was a stark contrast to how everything started. And I liked just how concrete it was despite both being kind of unsure where to take things. A lot of respect going around and just overall, the scene gave me warm fuzzies and gave me hope they could both have actual relationships with other ppl despite trauma. 2) I think Roara's trauma is what stood out the most to me. While only some people have to ever deal with the sort of physical issues like part of what Kipu suffers, I think everyone has been in some position to Roara's, at least on the level of being accussed of something they didn't do and being punished for it. That can be hardcore emotional trauma. In regards to what the comic can show us about dealing with trauma, I think that everyone handles it differently. Some people need revenge (even if that's not the healthiest), some people need time, some people need hugs, some people just want to be left alone, etc. Trauma manifests differently for everyone, and some people just handle it better than others. So ya gotta have patience and an open mind to spot it.

3) My favorite character is definitely Kipu. I like the concept that Kipu has to speak through text in short statements to convey whatever Kipu is trying to say. And I like to see how that, gestures, and other stuff are integrated to create a character who, while on the quieter side, can be just as vocal and opinionated as anyone else. Plus, I've enjoyed Kipu's backstory so far the most, cause Kipu strikes me as the most sympathetic so far.

4) I think Ores is kind of in between. Like I don't think Ores will randomly go murder hobo and is a nice person. But do I believe Ores is dangerous and is willing to kill to protect certain people's lives over others? Damn straight I do. Ores, regardless of the niceness, seems to have an agenda, and people will agenda's are generally gonn do some bad things in the name of those agendas. Mute...I'm gonna be honest. I get the impression Mute was paid to shelter Ores, but also secretly supports whatever it is Ores is trying to achieve. And I think this will come bite Mute in the butt when people come for Ores and probably destroy everything Mute has tried to build because desperation and murder don't mix well.

5) My favorite illustration so far is probably this city scape https://tapas.io/episode/1188947 I love the muted color scheme so that there can be glowing highlights, expressing the nightlife atmosphere that is taking over the city. I also love the variety in building shapes going on, cause it gives the place a lot of character as well. 6) I got the impression Roara was accused of killing her ex, perhaps by someone she knew and who had enough power to get away with it. And given it's her ex, Roara of course was prime suspect and its one of those cases where the police shrugged and didnt bother looking for anyone else. Given Roara's personality, I feel like she took pity on Cane when Cane first showed up at the prison and just kind of mother henned/big sistered herself in there out of pity. And then that pity turned to a lot of love and care to want to protect Cane who seemes kind of innocence. As for her future role, I get the impression she's gonna be on the wrong side of the law cause she seems like she'd go where Cane goes, and Cane is probably gonna switch side at the rate the flashbacks are going. XD

RebelVampire

QUESTION 7. Which characters do you enjoy seeing interact the most? What about their dynamic interests you?

QUESTION 8. Why do you think the Keld are attacking people and causing destructive and deadly incidents? What does this have to do what the senators are doing that is supposedly very risky?

Attila Polyák

Finally I got around to reading a comic here... 1, Llama alien family visit! The entire visit there is just so wholesome, even though they are clearly in a rather rough situation. And they are soo adorable. 2, There's a... I'd prefer not to. So with the first part of the question unceremoniously skipped. People are different. Their circumstances, good and bad, are also different. It's no surprise that people react to the same event(s) differently. People can, and most often do, try to understand each other but seeing and understanding how someone else deals with negativity in general in life is very iffy. You are not them, you might on an intellectual level understand that something really bad happened to them, but without their experiences and way of thinking... The best you can do is try which I guess doesn't sound too promising, but it's still a lot better than being left in the darkness. 3, Kipu. He's awesome! His way of communicating, his backstory (or what we know about it so far), his choice of clothes. Everything about him is just so intriguing. I'm looking forward to learning more about his past the most. 4, I think Ores is dangerous, but despite that he can still be trusted. He feels like someone who can go to extreme lengths for what he believes in. And I think This is the reason why Mute shelters him. Their longer term goals I feel are not the same, but I also think those goals might align one way or another.

snuffysam

1) I agree with @RebelVampire - the scene where Angelo and Kipu are opening up to each other is my favorite. It's just beautiful to see how far they've come since the start of the story! For the record, that's also my answer to (7). Angelo is of course a sass-master to Kipu, but it's the moments where Kipu returns fire that really sell the relationship. For 6) - while I agree Roara probably became friends with Cane because she wanted to protect him, I also get the impression that she has also been bailed out by Cane a couple times. Perhaps she tangled with someone too big for her and Cane had her back?

RebelVampire

QUESTION 9. What sorts of art or story details have you noticed in the way the comic is crafted that you think deserves attention?

QUESTION 10. What do you think Angelo/Kilene’s relationship with Prince is, and what exactly is Prince trying to protect Angelo/Kilene from? What is Angelo/Kilene’s story in general, and what is the patch showcased several times in the story?

RebelVampire

7) I definitely enjoy seeing Kipu and Angelo interact the most. Once again, I really like the development that goes with their relationship as they find common bonds despite basically despising each other beginning. And character growth is fun to watch. 8) I get the impression that the Keld know what the senators are up to and are trying to get people's attention and stop it. And people only pay attention when things get crappy, or something like that. As for what the senators are doing, I'm not entirely sure. Although I'm sure it's very illegal whatever it is, probably gonna chop down some liberties. Maybe they're secretly genociding the Keld or something like that. Either way, don't trust politicians.

9) I really love some of the details for the world building. For example, how different species have different naming structures. It's just one of those nice little details that really makes a species feel like a different species that developed its own non-earth culture. And it's details like these a lot of people neglect since they aren't always that important. Still, it's really great to see and adds some depth to the world. 10) I get the impression that Angelo and Prince dated before and had a mutual split. Maybe due to potential family pressures. That or they're brothers. One of the two. Either way they give off the vibe they were close and known each other for years. I get the impression that Angelo ran away though, and Prince is protecting Angelo from the repercussions from that. As for Angelo's story in general, maybe a rich kid, got into drugs, had health issues, rebelled against family. He strikes me very much as the type to have rebelled against everyone cause he didn't want to fit anybody's mold.

Attila Polyák

5, The funeral sequence is probably my favorite illustration (as morbid as that sounds). https://tapas.io/episode/522887 Just not just shows how funeral ceremonies are held, but also how important that death was in the earlier parts of the comic. The page not just looks great but also enhances previous pages by giving extra context. It's both beautiful in a grandiose way and plot important. 6, I absolutely agree with @RebelVampire about Roara. I think she's accused of killing her ex, however that couldn't be further from the truth. As for Cane. I just feel like he's a person who's willing to listen (pun absolutely intended, sorry I'm a bad person). Most people wouldn't want to be associated with someone who killed a significant other, Cane, however, I feel like not just listened to her, but believed her, and thus their friendship was formed.(edited)

Attila Polyák

7, That's a bit odd. I'm not really much of a fan of Angelo, yet whenever he interacts with literally anyone it's just... I donno, somehow charming and interesting. 8, When I read the talk about the risky stuff the senators are doing I for some reason almost immediately jumped to the conclusion that they are trying to build the Sybil System from Psychopass or something very similar. I think it's rather understandable why some would be against a system that judges you for stuff you didn't do and makes your most important life decisions instead of you (not that there are no advantages to a system like that but you know... the downsides are also obvious).  Aaaand... While I have no rational reason to expect this to be the case, I still do and I also have a feeling that the Kled know about this somehow and are trying to prevent it. Probably one of their leaders was scouted for this plan and this leader said no. Thus the Kled had an opportunity to know about what's going to happen and they believed it, but the rest of the world didn't and that's because of a simple reason: The senat obviously has power, possibly enough to turn the truth into a ridiculed rumor.

RebelVampire

QUESTION 11. What do you think are this particular comic’s strengths? What do you think makes this comic unique? Please elaborate.

QUESTION 12. What do you think happened to Kipu and Naia, especially given they both have severe physical trauma? Overall, what do you think will be the consequences of Kipu and Cane/Naia reuiniting for everyone else in the story?

RebelVampire

QUESTION 13. What are you most looking forward to in the comic? Also, do you have any final thoughts to share overall?

QUESTION 14. Now that Prince is free to pursue Ores, what do you think will happen to Nkapu and the rest of the crew? Will they be able to get out of the situation, or will their deeds catch up to them? In general, where do you think the story goes from here?

Attila Polyák

9, What stuck me most is how architecture looks. Yes it's futuristic as it's expected to be, but different locations, cities, villages in different places look well... Different. 10, I have the feeling that they were together in the past, both from a relatively wealthy background, but Angelo somehow thumbled down the social ladder around the same time when they broke up. Ultimately I feel like the two are unrelated, and Prince is still trying to support Angelo one way or another. 11, The scenery is gorgeous. Especially the colors during sunset/sunrise. Really eye catching. Actually... Not just the landscapes, but backgrounds in general are really well drawn and just good to look at. 12, I'm really unsure, but I have a feeling the connected events in their past happened while Kipu was attending the academy. 13, Kipu's backstory. I usually am a sucker for good backstories, but since his seems to conenct to the rest of the story in multiple different points I'm genuinely curious how both his relationships and the past events turn out. 14, In short I feel Prince will successfully go after Ores and a confrontation seems to be inevitable. However I'm really unsure as to the extent of this confrontation. Like... Mute is ultimately not just the captain of a ship, but basically the leader of a small city. We clearly see that Prince is in command of a lot of people, but Mute and co also seem to be a more than just a few and while they are not as well equipped as Prince. At this point I feel like the real question is, how much is Ores worth and how far are they willing to go to get him.

RebelVampire

11) In my opinion the strength is probably the mesh between world and characters. When it comes to world-building, that can be an intense process. The more you develop, the more the "character" of the world can be to overshadow the actual characters. However, this comic finds a great balanced between being detailed yet having the story strictly remain about the character's and their struggles. Which creates an all around better reading experience. 12) Honestly, Kipu and Naia probably got into a war since ya know, that's kind of what they're training for. And no one expects war to be as shit as it usually turns out to be. So probably big devastating battle where everyone was scattered and everyone was just assumed dead. As for consequences about them reunited, I don't think any of Kipu's friends will care, but I think it's gonna be a big deal for Roara. She doesn't strike me as the trusting kind of person.

13) I am actually looking forward to seeing where Angelo goes from here since the comic pulled a red herring and Kipu's group is more or less probably gonna ditch Angelo now (since most never liked Angelo anyway). So I want to see what Angelo's role will transform to be now. 14) Everybody is screwed. That is what's going to happen. Things will come to a head cause Mute's group, and by association Nkapu's group, don't send a chance even if the might be able to runaway for a while. And I think this will drive Ores into a corner and cause much destruction and feelings of regret.

Jurinova

Hey, author of HiaDW here! Just wanted to drop by and say that reading all these comments has been wonderful and very insightful! It's interesting to see how different people read different characters and situations, not to mention how spot on some of the analysis were. Thank you so much to all who read the comic and commented!

RebelVampire

COMIC TEA PARTY- WEEK LONG BOOK CLUB END!

Thank you everyone so much for reading and chatting about Home is a Distant Wish this week! Please also give a special thank you to Jurinova for volunteering the comic and creating it! If you liked Home is a Distant Wish, make sure to continue to support it via some of the links below!

Read and Comment: https://tapas.io/series/hiadw

Jurinova’s Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/jurinova

Jurinova’s Ko-Fi: https://ko-fi.com/jurinova

Jurinova’s Twitter: https://twitter.com/jurisaur

[malachitelibrary]

How to Make a Magic Learning Discord Server That Won't Fail

Many people make discord servers for the purpose of learning and sharing magical experiences, which is wonderful! However, many times these servers eventually fail. Here’s some advice so your server doesn’t end up being one of them.

As a general tip, a more specific discord will foster more learning than a general one. In a more specific discord, everyone already has common purposes and experience, thus more chances for complementary knowledge. A green witchcraft discord would get further than a simple “magic” discord; a shamanism discord would have more learning than a spirit work discord. A discord for specifically vampiric spirits/spirit companions would have more learning than a spirit work discord.

Note that the point is learning. Servers where you simply hang out with other practitioners are fun, however their often general nature is not conducive to learning in depth. “Yeah, this spirit species exists and is cool!” does not have the same depth quality as “I had this experience with your X spirits, this is how they manifested to me, this is their energy signature; my experience was different because Q…..but it was similar in Y….”.

On to the rest of the post,

Failure of a server defined as:

People rarely talked in the first place; a lot of people joined but nobody talks, so eventually everyone just leaves

There’s so much drama/BS that nobody wants to go on/people leave

Learning conversations never reach a certain amount of depth; only shallow knowledge is communicated at best. Nobody learns anything.

The server is so poorly organized/structured that nobody has any idea where anything is and therefore defeats the purpose of learning

STRUCTURING THE SERVER:

Add channels as needed, more channels are always better than less. With the “mute” function and the ability to turn off notifications yet still be able to see new messages, there is no reason to limit the amount of channels.

Have resource channels. These are channels centered around a very specific purpose; they are reference channels where only the resources are posted and no discussion should take place. Discussion on things posted should take place in OTHER channels. These are extremely important for organization! Suggested reference channels are bolded, below.

Suggested Base Channels (and explanation):

Rules -duh

Introduction- duh

Structure (roles, suggestions, server-wide announcements)

General -anything goes

Magic general -anything vaguely magical can go here

Divination_readings

Nsfw -duh

Resources_library

Salt_vent -Any salt or vent topics. (May want to set/limit rules to amount of salt [or not]. As some people feel morally bad just for being in a server where people are salty)

Again, make more channels based on what your server is around. The more specific each channel, the better. For example, in an energy work discord, the channels #energy_healing, #energy_experiments, #energy_classification would be more useful than a single #energy_work channel.

Suggested Introduction for a magic learning discord:

Name, Age, Pronouns, What I do (Labels), What I know, What I want to know, General About (Anything else like interests/hobbies/etc can go in the general about).

Feel free to customize this to your server’s needs!

Screening People:

NO MINORS. NO FUCKING EXCEPTIONS!!

Whether they’re mature or not is literally like playing russian roulette (and often times, they won’t be mature/their true maturity level will show at the tiniest problem)

Often poor magical discernment

Often beginners who will have nothing to contribute

Can’t talk about dicks/vag/other sexual adult topics (whether ur bangin spirits or other ppl)

Through tumblr you WILL get those minors who expect you to tag every single “trigger” ever instead of having the maturity to, you know, leave the conversation if a conversation makes them upset/has triggering content. And those minors who do not know the difference between their legitimate triggers  (things that cause panic attacks) versus things that make them uncomfortable (not actual triggers by the psychological definition).

If you let minors in you WILL have to play babysitting, mediator, teacher, advisor, etc; in addition, some minors will feel entitled to it and will get offended if you do not fulfill those roles for them.

My dude if this isn’t enough to convince you to not let minors in. Make a server with minors and see me after class

Do not make the server public/let anyone join freely- trust me, even if you start with only your friends, it WILL grow.

This is also because many people will not be open to talking about certain parts of their practice with absolute strangers. Therefore, trust is necessary to having in-depth conversations.

Limit 30 people. Think of actual classroom sizes- it always gets hectic when numbers go above 30. (talkin actual classrooms where discussion takes place, not lecture halls)

Do not invite anyone you know is easily offended/can’t handle disagreeing without feeling insecure

Do not invite anyone who is very much into the “tumblr mindset” (fits into the above point)

DO invite people who have basic critical thinking skills (will often correlate with not being of the tumblr mindset). Some basic critical thinking skills are:

Understanding that just because someone has a different experience, it doesn’t invalidate theirs

Understanding that a word can have multiple definitions

Knowing that analyzing something and bashing it are two completely different things

Understanding that there are often multiple methods to do things and that they can all be “right” simultaneously

Understand that even with the above point, methods may still be improved upon and some are/can be more effective than others

Able to extract applicable, impersonal info from personal experience

Etc...definitely not limited to this list.

Do not invite anyone who does not fit the salt level (or lack thereof) in the chat

Have mostly people with established practices and experience. Limit beginners to only those you know will put in the work on their own, know how to ask the right questions, and won’t obligate you to hold their magical hand.

This is because with too many beginners, learning/lesson/info/discussion/theoretical conversations will be shallow at best, because they will constantly be interrupted by “What is X??? What is Y?? How does (x basic thing all the experienced people already know) work??” And of course, since beginners have no idea what is going on, they will have nothing to add to the discussion.

Suggested Rules/Base Rules:

Feel free to literally copy/paste these! In fact I encourage it because they are good rules that have stood the test of time. Italicized is commentary/explanation/examples.

Welcome! Please read all rules before you post anything, and write a little introduction for yourself in the #introduce_yourself chat.

RULE ZERO: This is a dictatorship channel. Admins reserve the right to boot people without notice, override our own rules, etc. We say this because we will not tolerate attempts to manipulate loopholes in the own rules.

Yes, you must make it clear as fuck that you rule the server. If your rules and hand of justice are even, then as ADULTS (hint hint) everyone in the chat should understand.

Concerning Publicity/New People

-Do not post the link to this server publicly. Some of us are not comfortable with being publicly associated with paganism/the metaphysical. This includes tumblr and any other internet website.

-Please ask some people for an okay before adding someone new.

-18+ ONLY. NO EXCEPTIONS.

Concerning Problems/Drama (Aka “reasons to not have minors”)

-If you have a problem with anyone in the chat, deal with it privately unless it involves them breaking the listed rules.

-As an 18+ chat you are expected to have the discernment of offensive things of an adult, and the maturity to handle it if offended.

-Since this is an adult chat and adult topics will be discussed, if you ever feel uncomfortable with what it being talked or are triggered, about please remove yourself from the chat; it is your responsibility to leave the channel and calm down. We are all adults here. We are not going to stop a conversation because someone is upset.

-What happens in the server stays in the server. Keep drama that occurs to yourself and don’t go making public posts about it. Don't be gossiping or sending screenshots about what has been discussed here in an attempt to instigate drama or whatnot. If found out, you will be banned.

-Criticism/analysis is not the same as outright insulting/bashing. If you are not mature enough to handle this, please refrain from participating in the debates and/or remove yourself from the server.

-If questioning/analyzing different working methods, paths, etc, makes you uncomfortable, insecure, or feel invalidated, then this server is not for you.

-No reading, scanning, or visiting people, and interacting with their spirits/entities/companions without permission. For privacy, respect, and ward reasons.

-Keep salt/vent discussion to the salt/vent channel(s). Do not dump it in another channel if the vent channel is already busy.

-Yes, we know All Paths Are Valid(™). This assumption should already be obvious before debates. Do not bring this up as a way to distract from a debate/argument as it should already be known.

^^^I’ve seen this happen a lot. How it usually goes down:

P1/P2/P3: (discussing something experimental/controversial, but enlightening nonetheless)

A4: “but we should remember all paths are valid!!!”

A5: “yeah, all paths are valid! We can’t judge anyone, you guys should stop trying to compare different working methods”

A4/A5: (begin complaining about how someone found them invalid)

(the conversation P1/P2/P3 had never continued)  

Learning/Asking Questions

-If someone is asking a legitimate question, if you're going to joke/reply sarcastically, follow up with what you actually know or do not reply in the first place.

-Remain respectful when asking questions. Do not try to force someone to answer a question, especially if it is a personal question/on a topic that makes them uncomfortable.

-You are not obligated to answer questions that delve into territory that is uncomfortable/too personal. If a question is something you do not want answered, just politely say so.

-If a reading/experiment is going on in another channel, please do not interrupt the reading to ask for context that you could easily scroll up for, or attempt to make casual conversation in the middle of others’ experiments. Save your questions/comments for after the reading and/or comment in a different channel.

Server Structure

-We are not super strict on staying on topic, but please attempt to do so and switch channels if necessary.

-Channels (#list resource channels here…)  are resource channels, meaning that they are for very specific purposes. Discussion on things posted should take place in OTHER channels.  Sometimes we forget, that is understandable- but note that comments will be deleted after a time by an admin or mod.

-List of channels and explanation of each channel:

#channel name…….explanation….. (obvs fill this part in)

Writing New Rules/Writing Your Own Rules:

Group rules by type rather than number them. Please trust me on this one, it really helps for organization (plus there’s a 2000 character limit so you cannot have all rules in one post anyways.)

YES HAVE THE RULES IN AN ACTUAL RULES CHANNEL AND NOT TO AN EXTERNAL LINK (like linking to a google doc rather than writing the rules directly into the server).

Admin Skills/Requirements:

Structure/Organization: Poor organization will defeat your learning server very quickly.

Ability to read people and social context: THIS IS HOW YOU BOTH PREVENT AND FIX DRAMA!!

Guts: You’re going to have to kick people. You’re going to have to ban people. You’re going to argue, deal with gross people, etc. Some people won’t like it. Some people won’t like YOU because of it.

You Shouldn’t Be An Admin If You:

Lack most of above AND cannot find someone else who can do what you cannot 

Are conflict avoidant: if conflicts or issues give you anxiety/stress to a debilitating level, do not fucking admin. They WILL happen and if you cannot handle it, you should not admin.

Lack social skills/are not personable: Admin openness sets the tone for a chat.

Are easily offended: Self explanatory.

Hate being questioned: People WILL question your rules/authority occasionally. If you just throw a hissy fit or get passive aggressive when it happens, nobody will respect you, which will result in even more questioning; it becomes a vicious cycle.

Lack critical thinking: self explanatory

Picking Other Mods/Admins:

Of course, they should have the qualities listed in “Admin Skills/Requirements”

Have different strengths; get admins that can do things you can’t.

Pick people who think different from you; they’ll approach problems in other ways and thus you’ll be able to see many ways to solve a problem.

Things to be careful/wary and thus prepared about:

Admins/mods bringing in close friends/significant others/etc: Have you ever had an issue where your best friend/significant other in one friend group and your best friend group in another friend group disliked each other? Even if you haven’t, think about all the ways this could turn ugly. Exercise caution.

Be strict about keeping salt/vent posts to one channel: One thing I’ve seen happen is that if there’s already a conversation going in the salt/vent channel, people suddenly think that it’s alright to start venting in another channel. This interrupts learning/relevant conversations in that channel. If it’s not relevant to the channel (a not-spirit work complaint going in a spirit work channel) the salt/vent should not go there. 

Judgement/Discernment: Let’s make an example. Relevant to the previous point, someone is complaining about a problematic spirit in the spirit work channel. Would this fit your server or not? Now for another example. The vent channel is busy right now, so someone goes to the spirit work channel to complain about their human boyfriend. Would this fit your server?

Enforcing Rules/Kicking/Banning People:

Someone doesn’t have to be a Bad Person for you to kick them. Personality conflicts are a perfectly good reason; and often personality conflicts will lead to more drama than being a Bad Person. While it is possible to work it out with them, often reaching that point of needing to find a workaround already shows that there is an issue. If unresolved, more likely one/both/all of the people with clashing personalities will leave. It's also important to respect that people shouldn't have to budge. But hell, sometimes people dislike each other for pure miscommunication reasons; they may grow to truly like each other but be prepared as that’s usually the exception and not the rule.

It’s generally better to PM an iffy person and tell them in private to knock their shitty behavior off rather than embarrass/make an example of them in front of everyone. People are often more willing to coalesce in PMs where they can be personal/private, rather than in public where they must worry about everyone ganging up on them.

Typical, Example Issues You Should Be Ready to Deal With:

Note: This is not like a school test where there are solid right answers. Issues will always be contextual; these are simply some common examples so you’ll know how vague the “right answer” can be. 

-Someone new enters the chat and it’s clear that everyone is uncomfortable around them due to their personalities. But nobody wants to say anything because they want to be nice. How do you resolve this issue? Do you kick/ban the discomforting newbie? Do you PM the newbie one-on-one?

-You invite your best friend/significant other to the chat. However, quite a few people don’t get along with them. It’s reached the point where a number of members want them to leave or will leave themselves. What do you do?

-This person has been in a while, and many people have noticed that they are…rather noticeably immature. You check their blog. You find out they’re a minor. Do you kick them immediately? Do you make sanctions based on their behavior?

-This person has been in a while, and many people have noticed that they are…rather noticeably immature. You check their blog/intro, and find out they’re 30+ and act this way despite their age. They’re older than you. Immediate kick? Do you try to talk to them?

-Your server was previously a flourishing place where conversations could be taken to extreme depth; discussions with many viewpoints and clashing opinions were common, but everyone had the maturity to not take disagreement as a personal offense and this allowed everyone to learn the best. However, ever since some new people entered the server, these discussions have stopped because disagreement/clashing viewpoints offends them. Do you kick these new people? Do you say they can stay, but they have to suck it up (especially since they are adults)?

-Someone is talking about how they had a bad experience with a deity/goetic demon/other Large Spirit, and clearly needs advice/help. Instead, a devotee of that Large Spirit swoops in claiming any/all of the following: “UMMM Large Spirit NEVER does anything wrong!! You’re a terrible person for saying that!”, “It’s impossible for Large Spirit to abuse humans, so you must be imagining things!”, “Large Spirit only does things in someone’s highest good, so you must have done something horrible, meaning you deserved it!” What do you say in response? Do you tell them publicly, or do you PM them? 

-Someone is suggesting that a magical issue correlates with a mental/emotional illness, with no reasoning other than “I believe in this so it must be!!!” Additionally, it’s very clear that they’ve never had any formal education in psychology or at least read legitimate sources (not tumblr posts) on mental/emotional illness issues. Other people are agreeing with them. Do you school them all? Kick em all?

-Drama happened in the server, and it leaked to someone outside of the server who then confronts the person on their blog. Every shred of evidence points to one person leaking the drama, but when you PM that person about it they claim it wasn’t them. Do you kick the person anyways? Do you keep em but maintain a close watch on them?

Variations on the above one: 

Many people believe it was that one person who leaked it as well.

Most people don’t think it was them, but evidence points otherwise. Additionally, that one person is extremely popular and you think people would like you a lot less if you kicked them.

Nobody is able to pinpoint someone; rather, people believe it is one of the many lurkers of the server. However, that’s still quite a few people, and many of them are your friends who haven’t been actively lately and never gave a reason. 

-People have been coming to you in PMs that they believe one of the admins is abusing their power. You agree; you notice they tend to step on others in conversations, use their admin tools to set demeaning roles to people, and other gross things. You decide to PM that admin about it; what will you say? Should you have a kind or firm tone?

Variation: Some brave souls come to you in PMs saying that you have been abusing your power! Are they wrong? What do you do to the people who say so?

Obviously, the issues are not limited to this list.

--------------------------------

As with all of my posts, this will be updated occasionally as I get better info/advice. Always check the permalink for the most recent version. 

Current Version: September 26 2017

[whx-m]

sometimes theres an awkward beat in a conversation when i reference the few years of my life when i was homeless. sometimes its just bc ppl are surprised, or they ever expected someone like me to have been “like that” (aka their perception of a homeless person) but other times i get the impression that im not supposed to talk about it, that its a crude TMI topic.. like im totally shameless for it, it’s not something you’re supposed to admit. its something to lock away and throw away with the past, “move on” and forget.

honestly? im not ashamed at all. i’m truly not, i have no shame in my heart for being on the street and treated like scum. i didn’t allow myself to feel ashamed then when they spit at ground in front of me, i won’t allow anyone to shame me now. i had my moments of feeling totally worthless to the ones i loved and i had my spirals into depression for my situation, but not once would i let anyone make me feel like i was less than human. the beautiful people i met only cemented that in my soul- we were a pure force of energy, human beings pushing their will to live and experience life to the limit of what’s possible. i would never be ashamed of them, or myself by extension.

sometimes people make me feel like im too aggressive about my beliefs- my family likes to think of me as endearingly stubborn and headstrong about my opinions. i’ve had plenty of arguments with my conservative older siblings about gender, military/police brutality, social issues. its hard to make friends, its hard to open up to people- sometimes i feel like my presence is almost threatening to some, or maybe arrogantly direct. people shy away from me. i look people in the eye without any doubts behind mine that i know who i am and what i stand for. i think people take that kind of vibration differently... some are drawn to it and some are repelled. 

but there’s this loneliness almost, that elevates everything that happened to me beyond shame. it’s the only time in my life i’ve known many, many others who struggled with that soul-crushing depth of will and claimed their lives for their own. waking up and thinking, how will i survive today? where should i point my feet and walk? and over and over, every moment of the day, every conversation or eye contact, who can i trust? who can i trust? who can i trust? what do they want from me? who are you? constantly measuring and analyzing risks. setting a goal can save your life, hesitation and being idle or passive could kill you.

i’ve never met so many clear, innocent eyes. i’ve never seen such pure kindness in other human beings. people who spread their arms and welcomed me into their world, the one they pieced together with what they could achieve. we all ate, we all survived together again and again, different groups, different towns. people come and going in the process, either to be fed and comforted with love or people returning with even more excess and blessings to share. have you eaten? where are you sleeping tonight? do you know where to go for this? do you know where the nearest bathroom is? do you have anything to trade? here, i know you needed a good pack because your overloaded jansport backpack is killing your back. i traded a map i didn’t need for this old military metal frame pack, take it. it’s not the best, you’ll have to sew this spot up with dental floss, but it’s a start. nah i don’t need anything for it, just kick it down to someone who needs it when you get a better one. have you eaten? it’s going to rain soon, do you have a tarp? hey there’s a feed at the chruch today, do you need directions?

one time, i bought a bunch of hot dogs and bratwurst with my food stamps and took them to the park where everyone else would pass through in the morning and afternoon, usually for the public bathrooms. i started a fire and we cooked them up on the park grills, more people showed up and started sharing their food. a pregnant mom shows up and was so happy to be getting some meat, i cooked up the last of the brats for her and took a walk to the middle of the giant field of grass to sit and get some sun. a little while later she padded out to me with bare feet and sat next to me, telling me how badly she needed some meat and how grateful she was i had shown up to share some, it was just what she needed. i told her that made me happy, im so glad we crossed paths when i had something to give. she handed me a bright turquoise piece of calcite, a mix of blue and green calcite. i’ve never seen such a beautiful color, and i’ve never seen calcite just the same shade no matter how many mineral shows i attend. it was breathtaking in the sun, ill never forget it. she said i couldnt refuse it, to her its a token of friendship. even though we didnt exchange names and i’d never seen her before, or since- she just gave me the stone and told me she hoped it would bring me blessings and left. but it was such a pure gesture, neither of us felt shame in needing food or receiving a beautiful gift. i still treasure this stone.

and thats just a moment in a cascade of kindness and human moments- people who wanted nothing but to build each other and themselves up. we’ll survive this! don’t lose yourself, be smart, be wise about slipping into the comfort of drowning your life out with the vices you can attain. stay alert, stay alive. stay laughing and smiling, show them all how human you still are. look into your heart for what you know you can do, what you can still give. the will it takes to show people love when the entire world wants you out of their sight. these people taught me so much and did so much for each other, an almost overwhelmingly genuine compassion. 

i’ll die before i feel a drop of shame for being a part of and witnessing that, that was the closest i ever felt to god. like being on the front lines of a spiritual war- like meeting angels and demons and living among them with nothing but my human will to protect me. being ashamed of that is a joke, what i’m ashamed of is how i now feel like a fat king of my castle, sitting around sort of bored and directionless, isolated and insulated from the war that’s only raging harder outside. trying to spend all this time and energy figuring myself and my life out- time spent on art, stories, fantasies, trying to generate some meaning to my life now. put that tested will to work with what resources i have. but it’s just not as effortless, that will doesn’t flood out of me anymore. how could i be so brave and bright then but so paralyzed and dull now? what’s a shame is that i did more for the world with nothing but my life on my back. it’s hard to feel like i didn’t just spiritually peak early, like my magnum opus already happened privately and now nothing i create will ever be able to compare. maybe to others, but never to me.

[blacknovelist]

To get your mind working through the haze of woozyness from the anesthesia, A more specific ask for the AU+AU of the Canon!1-A and Ageswap!1-A in Role Reversal world: Both classes meeting Number 1 Hero All for One, Principal Stein, and both Deku's and Toshinori having an encounter with their villainous counterpart. And being aided by Hero!AFO and Shigaraki, who both Canon and Ageswap pupil's had discovered was a bit of a shy dork beneath his detached demeanor. At least in school.

Hoh, the effects were mostly gone, I think, but thank you for the thought! Mostly, the anaesthetic just made it so I couldn't much stop talking, but that's not too different from me on the regular anyway, haha. :PBut nonetheless, to go into greater depths concerning each class's reactions to specific characters in the Role Reversal verse... Not much changes from the previous answer, admittedly, apart from some more specific little bits.Ageswap 1-A would have the easiest time of adjusting, so to speak, though encountering Principal Stain would still be Weird as Hell bc Stain more or less stays the same between universes tbh (him being cast as principal is a surprising choice, but I can't say I don't think it's interesting! :0). I imagine their reaction to seeing Canon 1-A's villains as heroes and that would be, just, off in general. You know something isn't quite right, but, you can't exactly say anything about it either. Encountering All for One as the top hero, for Ageswap Deku especially, is damn surreal. They only know AfO as the calm, cool, collected student of a fully grown Shigaraki, but seeing him as this larger than life figure, only comparable to Ageswap Izuku's status?? They know they can trust this alternate, logically, but instinct is a bitch - only the fact that they're used to, again, young AfO, really helps however little. The same goes for Role Reverse Shigaraki, too.Poor canon 1-A has no such fallback. Most of the kids have difficulty accepting and getting used to Shigaraki and AfO as "good guys", especially Shigaraki. Though, Role Reversal Shigaraki would be a bit younger than canon Shigaraki, I guess? Which isn't much, but it'd help, a bit. I envision their reactions to Role Reversal AfO, Shigaraki and Stain to be a lot like their reaction to Ageswap Enji before they really got used to him, except about ten times worse and lasting three times as long. Toshinori is the worst off when AfO is around, though at least RR AfO wears a different outfit from canon, I imagine.A lot of characters who were more directly affected by the villain counterparts (canon Toshinori, all the kids who went to Kamino Ward to find Bakugou, canon Bakugou, etc) find themselves unable to keep their eyes off the Role Reversal guys, though not for lack of trying. They sleep in shifts for the first few months, for their own peace of mind most of all. Mostly it's all very disorienting. I mean, imagine someone you hate at work or at school is suddenly a good person trying to help you even though you know they hate you back in reality - you want to be able to like them back, but memories and life experience are a bitch. Slotting in timeline-wise, chances are, when canon and Ageswap 1-A encounter the Role Reversal villains, it's mostly RR!Izuku and a handful of other RR villains like RR!Tenya, RR!Tsuyu, and RR!Ashido. Mostly because in my head, they (and a few others he took with him there's no way he'd go with like three ppl) would be best at getting in and out of places and chances are, RR!Izuku didn't attack the 1-A's to prove a point or cripple anytime, he did it to suss out his hero counterparts. Still, even outnumbered, RR Izuku is not a force to be messed with, and he makes it known. For canon Izuku, and canon 1-A, it's all just shock. What comes to mind are a bunch of initial plans I had for A Place to Be, where Hisashi was originally a criminal/villain and made that fact known to Izuku and the others, tho the way I wrote Izuku's reaction in the final drafts didn't change much even tho he's not technically outright anything bad in APTB now. But the tldr of it is, a lot of heavy shock, and also the entirety of canon 1-A aggressively converging around canon Izuku and hammering into everyone's head that their izuku is not the man in front of them wrecking shitWhile canon Izuku reboots and the rest of canon 1-A split between holding off the Role Reversal villains and looking after their Izuku, Ageswap are moving in to also stop the villains. This villain Izuku, while it's strange to be fighting someone who shares faces with their teacher/dad and a dear friend, is still different enough that tbh it isn't.........a huge challenge to fight him and the other RR villains. That's probably the only real good thing about all this multiverse jumping - even if their faces are the same, their ages and experiences and outfits change too.When canon Izuku is ready to get in on this, no one holds back against the villains, regardless of faces. It would be a disservice to everyone, if they didn't treat this fight like a real possible life or death one, because you just really never know if something is gonna go wrong, ever. What ends up most jarring, though, is definitely the sight of RR!Shigaraki leaping into the fray with RR 1-A and the teachers, and with all the ferocity of a very angry cat. Before this, Shigaraki probably kept distance - he, too, has his fair share of weariness, but also in general he's not a huge people person. But here, in a fight, keeping people safe? That's his scene, man.Ageswap Deku has a minor heart attack (or five) watching little Shigaraki leap into the fight, at first because he can't get the image of his students disintegrating out of his mind, then because it turns out that sometimes Shigaraki of the RR universe can get a wee bit reckless out there and Jesus Christ boy watch your sides please be careful holy shit please don't die(Canon Toshinori is watching with him and thinking about how this could have been his Shigaraki, his Tomura, once upon a time. It hurts, thinking about it, because it reminds him again of every single way he's managed to fail his Nana and her family.)RR Izuku and them back off quickly and get away scot-free, though not for lack of trying. They just know what they're doing. The juxtaposition of RR Shigaraki in a fight and RR Shigaraki in any other situation on planet Earth is massive, reminds everyone of Ageswap Enji, and does well to diffuse a few of the lingering tensions after that brawl. Some of canon and Ageswap will never really be able to be casual or normal around the Role Reversal guys (Canon Tenya and Ageswap Enji to Stain, canon Toshinori to AfO, both Deku's to Shigaraki), but, there's less reason to sleep with an eye open once you understand a little bit more about the other side.

[kokeggy]

my brain is filled with ouma and i cant stop it

i totally forgot the time man, its almost been 2 months since i played the game and it totally didnt feel like that at all

i still can recall a ton of things fluidly and as for now i dont see a particular reason to replay the game (other than wanting to get to know ouma better) 

but oumas character is just.. so tragic. i cant even begin to explain the depth of his character, it would be pages long and im way too lazy for that. ill always just write mental drafts and let myself feel when it comes to ouma

ill a cut here since its already a bit long rn lmao

and i think ouma is a character who is deeply troubled by his insecurities/possible mental illnesses (such as bpd or servere depression) in a way that these insecurities are his most memorable characteristics. that is absolutely sad and tragic

furthermore since the moment i started to play this game i always thought it was suspicious that ouma claimed he hated liars even tho he was one himself. sure that couldve been one of his lies, but my intention rlly didnt like this idea so i thought he was actually speaking the truth. i realized today that ouma was hinting at shuichi that he hated this persona that he had to create for the sake of this game

but i do agree that i sometimes tend to overthink ouma lmao while is incredibly intelligent, he couldnt have figured everything out, plus his trust issues and paranoia were in the way of looking into every possible situation. yet i somehow believed that he did a lot of stuff while being completely aware of their consequences - but thats not possible. ouma is not a superhuman who can figure out what happens to the world in [insert year]. hes a character with deep flaws which balances his cunning behavior 

to his actual personality, i might seem like the most biased person in the world but i truly believe that ouma didnt want to harm anyone. its just that the killing game... happened lol

as far as i can self-insert, i do believe if i happen to be in a killing game i would be quite similar about it. minus the creating a fake persona thing for me its absolutely impossible to trust 15 people whom i just met that they wouldnt kill me under stress. you know, if you activate the right buttons on someone, they can work how you want them to. and this is what feared ouma (rightly so)

anyways i take the anthologies as canon material since theyre approved and licensed by spike chunsoft, and we obviously see that ouma is nowhere near as antagonistic as he was in the game. although, i only have read the first anthology (also while we are at it, i cant wait to buy the thjree v3 anthologies even without knowing japanese, lulz)

but we also see his character actually getting darker and darker with each chapter, with chapter 4 probably taking the point. esp on when it ended. at first i was kind of conflicted about his oversentimal reaction towards gonta being executed, because that felt just as fake as his overly evil presentation afterwards. altho after some time thinking abt this, i came to the conclusion that he just leaked a little bit of his juicy true self(tm), realized that what he meant was actually genuine and then proceed to vent his emotions in making him seem like the most villainous person u ever met. because i think one of the reasons ouma acted out like is because he believed he was at fault for gontas death. so instead of trying to sweet talk yourself, he just took the oppurtunity to make him the least likeable person. cuz who would ever want to like someone who jokes about genuinely being concered about someone dying? yeah no one dude

also i think ouma is ironically a bit well-mannered (yeah guis im not joking here). ..  .if we ignore all his stupid pranks.. so you see, whenever i got rejected after dates with ouma in salmon mode.. it went like this for example “eeh, wow you are going to the libary with me and now you want to leave? that hella rude man, why am i wasting my time like this” or “wow you really must think highly of yourself if you think you are worth changing for, how arrogant”  which looks like he knows what is appropriate and what not

i remember what he said that and i suddenly went like “shit i cant believe im hearing this from you man” which was kinda funny as a side note btw

anyways, to his motive video. oh shit, his motive video . . . even without having known how messed up the translation was, that damaged me.-.. i mean i always thought that ouma exaggerated the size of his organization, at some poiint i just thought that his entire organization was a lie and his tru talent was the ultimate liar. which obsly wasnt the case lmao 

but his motive video.. just wanting to prank ppl for laughs and entertainment. its so light hearted compared to what he claimed it to be that it hurts another thing that i think is worth noting is that DICE was his motive video, not his family. DICE, who is like family. but not his actual family. what does that mean? does that mean that his actual family wasnt like family to ouma? i sure as hell thought so and i still do 

a different thing is that ouma said that nobody would care about him dying and that his organization would be better off without him, plus that it seems that monokuma said that ouma knows what happened to DICE in the motive video which leads me to.. uhh.. what if ouma did something he absolutely regretted doing (since it caused DICE trouble?) - but im not entire set on that theory

its also sad that he constantly had to hint about hiimself instead of just talking abt it to shuichi. like, he wanted shuichi to help him or actually even hinder him at carrying out his plan, he low key hoped for it because shuichi is a detective which showed to be shrewd enough to be able to make proper deductoins in class trials, furthermore he isnt a dick towards ouma and actually respects him in a way. something that ouma most likely didnt calculate

which mades the statement that shuichi said in the end of chapter 4 even more painful. shuichi was the only person that ouma kind of trusted and relied on. and prob the only one he wanted to show his true self to, that very person told him hes 5 ever alone with no friends at all. that hes a pathetic little brat who should start to view the world differently (def not what shuichi said 1:1 but.. yeah idk my own interpretation) 

im pretty sure that hurt ouma a lot 

hnnng, i truly wished for ouma to be one of the survivors. altho i figured that hes gonna plot something absolutely mind blowing in chapter 5, i seriously couldnt believe that he was actually dead... well, not until the closing argument. as soon as there were the words “closing argument” all over my screen i began to cry like an idiot. i couldnt even read properly man, thats just how blurry my vision was from all the tears

in other hand: i was (and still am lol) extremely attached to ouma and his death was very unsatisfying, since he died quite heroic but nobody considered him so. also he never made up with these ppl. also fuck kodaka

[oumakokichi]

So I've seen a few opinions of ppl who say that ALL Ouma ships are bad because they are "abusive" or toxic because Ouma would "bully" the other and they're unhealthy, etc. I've read so many of ur metas so Ik that's not completely true. But as a fellow Ouma and SaiOuma shipper, what do think of this?

I think it’s an unfortunate fact that many people sometimes takeaspects of a ship which aren’t always the best or the healthiest out of contextand associate them with words like “abusive” or “toxic” when that really isn’tthe case at all.

I’m reminded of the ask I got a while back from an anon whomentioned that people had been calling Tenko a “creepy stalker” just becauseshe was overly eager about making friends with Himiko and needed to learn torespect that Himiko is much slower about opening up to people. Again, it’s aperfect example of a ship that does have flaws getting completely misunderstoodand drastically misinterpreted out of context to make it look a lot worse thanit is.

Any relationship, be it romantic or platonic, has flaws. Orat least, it should. Adding flaws and things to work on and improve and, yes,even occasional unhealthy behaviors makes a ship much more realistic, and givesthe characters something to work on addressing. Relationships without any flawsat all lack depth. That’s not to say they can’t be enjoyable or cute in their easygoingness,but they simply aren’t realistic.

By “flaws” and “unhealthy behaviors,” I want to note that Idon’t mean anything edgy. Ships don’t have to be dark and gritty or angsty inorder to be realistic, interesting, and compelling. Even a ship that seems themost lighthearted and laid back can still have really interesting flaws—these canbe anything from a lack of communication (maybe one character doesn’t tell theother when something is wrong because they don’t want to make them worry) tosimple misunderstandings (maybe a character accidentally speaks for or overanother character because they thought they would like something, and it turnsout they don’t, and they have to discuss that kind of behavior and work on it).Either way, even the most “vanilla” ship can still be fleshed out andinteresting and compelling, as long as there are some flaws in it.

As with individual characterization, of course, the mostimportant thing to keep in mind for writing ships is to not brush those flawsunder the rug. Having a character’s flaws get addressed and called out withinthe narrative serves to highlight the fact that they’re not perfect and thatthey really do have things they need to work on. It keeps the character(s) fromgetting a free pass, and helps convey to the reader that these kinds ofbehaviors are unhealthy and need to stop in order for a healthy dynamic ofunderstanding and trust to ensue.

I would say that Ouma’s flaws as a character get more than called out within thenarrative. Not only is his hostile and antagonistic behavior constantlyportrayed within a negative light even when he’s arguably doing it for “theright reasons,” but Chapter 4 alone is almost entirely dedicated to being “theOuma call-out chapter.”

Despite Ouma’s motivations, it is absolutely true that hebecomes far too fixated on Saihara in Chapter 4. Unable to bring himself totrust anyone else, he decides that if he does ally with Saihara, he wants it tobe only with him and no one else. And to that extent, he tries to force Saiharato cut ties with Momota and the rest of the group, because he believes that he’s“wasting his time” with them and that they’re “dragging him down” by becomingoverly-reliant on his detective skills.

There’s a reason his confession scene in Chapter 4 is such amorbid double-entendre. When he says he’s the kind of person who wants “theperson he fell in love with” to look only at him, even if it means “putting hishands around their neck,” he’s not referring to actually strangling Saihara oranything nearly so grotesque. But it’s still a pretty messed up comment to make(not only because it’s very dark foreshadowing about Miu’s death, as her corpseis discovered in the scene immediately following his confession).

It highlights his unhealthy mindset by that point, thelevels of paranoia that he’s mired up in, and the fact that he honestlybelieves forcibly trying to make Saihara “look at him” and cooperate with himis for the best, regardless of Saihara’s actual wishes or thoughts on thematter. He’s stuck in tunnel vision, completely justifying his asshole behaviorby saying it’s “in order to stop the killing game,” trying to act as though “theends justify the means,” when the simple fact of the matter is that he’sjealous of Momota and the others and wants Saihara to pick him over them. Itsounds very childish, and that’s what it boils down to: he’s being a child andhiding behind his more strategical, logical objectives in order to justify it.

But the thing is, while this behavior is unhealthy and messedup and a perfect example of Ouma acting like an inexcusable jerk, it getsdirectly addressed within the narrative. Rather than just sitting passively andletting Ouma say what he wants, rather than cutting ties with anyone, Saiharaputs his foot down. He tells Ouma point-blank in the Chapter 4 post-trial thathe’s pathetic for acting the way that he is, and that he’s just doing itbecause he’s lonely and jealous that Momota has people who care about him buthe doesn’t.

And Ouma, despite being the world’s biggest smart-ass, triesto respond to that—and can’t. He immediately stops his villain act, says he “gotbored,” and wanders off, because he literally doesn’t have any good retort toSaihara’s accusations. Saihara called him out on his behavior and it was 100%true, and while it’s certainly understandable why Ouma acted the way that hedid, it’s a good thing that he wasn’t just given a free pass for it by thenarrative. In fact, on a first playthrough, the player is actively encouragedto hate Ouma, not only for his actions towards Saihara but for what he did toGonta as well, since it seems as though he’s just acting purely antagonisticand evil for no reason at all.

This kind of willingness to discuss and call out flaws issomething I think is necessary for any character dynamic, be it a friendship ora romantic relationship. See, as long as there are flaws or negative aspects toa relationship, just about any ship has the potential to become “unhealthy.” Butthose flaws don’t make a ship “abusive” or “toxic.” These words are oftenassociated with ships as a kneejerk reaction, because people have either madeoverly hasty judgments based on misinformation, or because people want to skewpublic opinion about a ship a certain way. It’s easy to slap these labels on aship without much proof or justification—and that’s very, very dangerous,because it causes mix-ups and misunderstandings with what actually qualifies asabuse or toxic behavior in a relationship.

As someone who has a lot of firsthand knowledge with abusebecause of family reasons, and as someone who’s currently in a very healthy andloving relationship, I can say that there’s a huge difference between the two.Abuse stems from an imbalance of power, with one person in the dynamic, be it familyor friend or significant other, trying to constantly belittle and undermine theother person, despite the occasional “honeymoon” phase, or brief times whenthey’re nice to you. “Unhealthy” behaviors are just flaws: things you or the otherperson might sometimes do unconsciously, but which can be addressed anddiscussed rationally, and improved, as long as you admit to them and make aconscious effort to do them less often.

Ouma has a lot offlaws. That’s one thing I’ve never tried to deny in any of my meta, nor will Iever try to, because it’s an undeniable fact. But I think trying to say that “all”ships with him, or that saiouma in particular would be “abusive” or “toxic” isa gross exaggeration and fails to address the ways in which Ouma actuallyinteracts with the people he cares about.

Let’s take his canonical interaction with Saihara, forexample. Chapter 4 is Ouma at his most fixated, and Chapter 5 is after he’sdecided to cut almost all ties with Saihara and the others, so that he candeliberately pretend to be the ringleader instead. But let’s examine some ofhis other interactions with Saihara throughout the game. In his FTEs and themain story alike, he constantly encourages Saihara, rather than belittling him.

Whenever Saihara guesses the right answer in a trial orpicks up on some clue or other he’s left for him, he praises him openly.Saihara sometimes wonders if he’s just being sarcastic, because Ouma is a knownliar, but it’s a fact that Ouma only ever makes these comments whenever heseems truly, genuinely impressed that someone is actually following his trainof thought.

He’s deeply interested in Saihara and in trying to figurehim out, and it’s clear that prior to Chapter 4, where he became hell-bent onstopping the killing game “no matter what the cost,” he actually does want toprioritize Saihara’s wishes and happiness over his own—which is, I think,pretty indicative of what a sympathetic person he is at heart.

As an example of what I mean, there’s a point in Chapter 3where Ouma says that he wouldn’t want to actually resurrect Amami for the “resurrectionmotive.” When Saihara asks him why in surprise, Ouma says it’s because hethinks Saihara himself would be happier if they could resurrect Kaede instead,and that he’s “thinking of his beloved Saihara-chan.” He tries to brush it alloff immediately afterwards as a lie, but considering there was no need for himto bring it up in the first place, and considering it matches perfectly wellwith his behavior in his FTEs and other parts of the game, I think he wasprobably telling the truth.

In his FTEs, he’s playful.He’s a brat who wants attention and loves to tease, but really, he’s justplayful with Saihara. His FTEs are some of the best evidence prior to Chapter 6of the fact that, for all his bluffs, he’s little more than a harmlessprankster; he spends the whole time with Saihara “threatening to kill him inthe end,” only to spend every FTE either playing Yu-Gi-Oh, drinking tea, ortying a game of rock-paper-scissors for 100 rounds. And in his final FTE, hewraps it all up by losing the knife game on purpose and letting Saihara win,giving him as many hints as possible to the true way to win the killing gameitself—which is to say, “don’t play it.”

His prison mode ending provides us with direct insight intowhat Ouma is like in a situation where he’s far less paranoid. Without thekilling game ever starting, he remains cautious, but he’s far less distant.Unlike his FTEs where he cheekily but firmly lets Saihara know that they won’tbe hanging out anymore, and where Saihara can tell that Ouma “won’t reach outor let himself be reached out to,” in his prison mode ending, Ouma actuallyasks Saihara to stay by his side, stating that he knows Saihara “wants to knowmore about him” and thinks that he’ll be able to do so if they stay togethereven after leaving Saishuu Academy. Saihara accepts, admitting to himself thathe’s certainly very curious about Ouma and that he doesn’t think Ouma can “lieabout the warmth of his hand”—a metaphor, I think, to the fact that for all hislies and pranks and tricks, Ouma can’t quite lie about his good intentions atheart.

There’s also what little we know about DICE, if that’s anyindication as to what Ouma is like with the people he truly cares about. Whilenot much is certain about them, we do know for a fact that Ouma’s motive videorefers to them as “friends bordering on family, closer to him than anyone, hisabsolute favorite people in the entire universe.” Clearly then, Ouma is verymuch capable of valuing other people and doing things for their sake. Ratherthan being the “evil Supreme Leader” he pretended to be, he was simply a leaderof a group of pranksters—and he loved them very much. This also supports whatwe’ve theorized about Ouma being a very caring, loving person beneath thesurface, despite the fact that he tries just as hard to play the unfeelingstrategist as he does the evil villain.

In the end, it’s this side of Ouma that makes him soenjoyable to ship, in my opinion. There are things he would need to work onwhen in a relationship with just about anyone, but I think it’s a hugedisservice to Ouma’s character to imply that he would be “abusive” or “toxic”to someone he was with. He is, after all, someone who puts others needs abovehis own. Even when he acts like he knows best or does incomprehensible,confusing things, he always emphasizes that it’s “for everyone’s sake.” Hissacrifice in Chapter 5, and the fact that he died when he could easily haveavoided doing so by letting Momota and Maki die instead, shows that clearly, hewould rather put others above himself, even if it means getting himself killed.

That said, there are of course, Ouma ships that I’m not afan of, and which I do think stray into much riskier territory simply becausethey’re on uneven footing from the start. Gonta and Ouma as a ship is a primeexample—not only does Ouma manipulate Gonta into getting killed, but Gontatrusts him implicitly because he’s very naïve and caring, while Ouma is awarefrom the start that he’s treating Gonta like a pawn. Regardless of the factthat I do think Ouma liked Gonta as a person and thought of him as somethingclose to a friend, it’s true that there’s a power imbalance there, and that I’mnot comfortable with shipping them as a result.

But there are plenty of Ouma ships in which he’s on evenfooting with the other party, and which I find interesting and compelling.There’s saiouma, of course, in which Ouma wants for Saihara to chase after himand understand him, to play the detective to his “phantom thief.” I’ve listedplenty of reasons why I enjoy saiouma, including the fact that Ouma is one ofthe main characters to encourage Saihara and push him to grow stronger anddevelop, as well as the fact that it’s based on two characters struggling topuzzle each other out and understand each other.

There’s also oumami and kiibouma, as a few other examples.Ouma and Amami have vast potential, as two characters who wanted to “stop thekilling game,” and who had a lot in common but never got to interact much incanon. Ouma clearly found Amami mysterious and interesting, and would’ve likedto have known more about him, I think.

Meanwhile Kiibo and Ouma are both intentional parallels ofeach other, both of them deliberately set up to represent “hope” and “despair”in Tsumugi’s killing game while coming to subvert their expected roles. WhileOuma teases Kiibo and sometimes can be somewhat of an ass about it, he’s alwayscalled out on it by Kiibo, and most of their interactions are more likechildish banter than anything remotely mean-spirited.

At the end of Chapter 5, Kiibo is the only character whosays outright that he doesn’t think Ouma was lying about hating the killinggame, and who wants to “end the killing game” himself as a direct result ofseeing Ouma and Momota’s sacrifices. And like Saihara, Kiibo is the only otherpicture set aside on Ouma’s whiteboard—clearly, he had a hard time figuring himout too, considering Kiibo definitely had ties to the audience and was soobviously suspicious, but also so obviously had his own free will and sense ofindividuality. The two of them have potential for really interesting interaction,especially as they were put on deliberately similar footing for most of the game.

These are just a few examples, to say the least. There areothers, but this has already gotten very long, so I’ll stop. But I wanted toaddress this topic in full because it’s something very important to discuss, inmy opinion, and it’s important to try and note the difference between flaws andunhealthy behaviors and downright abuse. Thank you for giving me a chance totalk about this kind of thing, anon, and I hope I was able to answer yourquestion!

[tiffanyastrology]

Moon in the 3rd in Scorpio

I think Moon in the 3rd house people are my favourite. I have Jupiter in the 3rd in placidus (I have friends now studying whole sign... Neptune is in the 3rd in my whole sign chart). I love talking to interesting minds and these are the most interesting people. But, moon in the 3rd in Scorpio. Damn. If you need deep and/or taboo conversation. Nobody is more willing to explore that than a moon in Scorpio in the 3rd. And it's effortless. And the ones I've been close to is because I have needed someone to talk to daily. They have been completely down with that. The conversation flows. My best friend is a Scorpio moon in the 3rd and we had more messages exchanged in 3 months than I had with someone whom I had fairly in depth conversations and had known for a year. This placement just have incomparable depth, and abundance of thoughts and feelings. And these messages were not short in nature. They were not without "lol" type responses, but! There was definitely more than enough in depth paragraph length responses. They were meaningful. It is not to say every Scorpio moon in the 3rd would message that way. I'm merely sharing this because when I say there was more messages in 3 months with my Scorpio moon best friend compared to 1 year with another good friend... Those messages Were not Communicated In this manner, like Some people Including myself Will send messages in short bursts This reflects In essence How ones mind is processing the sentence My friend just doesn't do that My friend does this when the emphasis that this form of messaging applies. I'm just saying that when I say we exchanged a lot of messages, they were not short messages like some of us will do... they were mostly large ones. Anyway, I'm basically writing this, because I love my moon in the 3rd best friend and they are in a time of solitude. And I'm like, "Who do I even talk to?" Nobody can compare to a moon in the 3rd in Scorpio. You know how you meet someone and you're like, "Wow, omg we talked for 5 hours. It was so deep." Well that's like literally us everyday. I don't know how other people live... having conversations like we have maybe on only special first time meetings with some temporary being. Though I would be satisfied talking to this human for hours everyday... I am glad they need alone time to be in their feelings. It helps me gain perspective too. Helps me connect with others. Though honestly with my Cancer/Scorpio influence... I'm like... "um... I don't need anything if I have you as my best friend." I'm just glad I've evolved to someone who doesn't take it personal. And that I see these as opportunities for myself to grow. In the past, when I've formed similar connections with friends - people I talk to for hours everyday about their deepest, darkest secrets - they eventually need to go back to a routine. I didn't understand how they couldn't include me in their routine lol. Logically I did, emotionally it felt like disconnection. Abandonment. I'm glad I went through those before meeting my Moon in the 3rd Scorpio moon friend. They're so important to me that if I wasn't mature enough for them, I'd have surely damage the friendship somehow. Though they assure me they're quite different than literally these other folks... and they're right - they are - it's not them. It's me. I would've fucked it up because of my insecurities of who I used to be. I do trust this person would've been the most gentle with my insecurities, but I wouldn't have felt worthy at the time. I would've felt uncomfortable. So I'm just glad for where I'm at. I'm a stronger person for the transformations I've gone through. I'm glad I am who I am for my Moon in the 3rd in Scorpio friend. I'm also glad that who I used to be would've been treated with great compassion. I'm glad they take care of themselves and take some space to not talk to me, because I will never do that to them. Ever. I just won't ever feel like that's necessary. Emphasis on feel. I logically know I should have breaks from messaging people but I just don't feel a need to disconnect like most ppl do. But, it's her taking perspective on things, and it forces me to take perspective on my own. Which is hard. I process really well by reflecting on ppl. I try a Lot to do it myself but I don't get nearly as far as fast as I do if I have someone to talk to. Anyway. Tooooo long but that's what Tumblr is for