#not because i dont want to seem weak. maybe its because i dont like being vulnerable

[qoldenskies]

ive been thinkin about it today and ngl i am not personally interested in envy being a point of contention in leo and donnie's relationship unless it goes equally extreme on both sides, both of them yearning for the each other's particular confidence in their strengths while failing to understand completely that its just one big coping mechanism and not something that should be envied at all. not twins in the way that they complete each other and need the other to feel whole, but in the way that they always feel incomplete no matter what they do, always secretly undervaluing what they have already, and the other has everything they want to feel worthy as a person. i ESPECIALLY enjoy this dynamic if this is contrasted with them being extremely caring and supportive of each other even as they feel stuck in each other's shadows..... so much drama can be derived from the idea

[kaeyapilled]

. (tw heterosexuality)

[jackass-jones]

Tags by @neuromantis

Yeah definitely that’s why I’m always kinda hesitant to say much about snake as a disabled character cuz it’s like. Certainly not as bad as some shit ive seen but it’s mostly because it’s not incorporated into his character hardly at all, it’s only mentioned when plot convenient

Take what I’m about to say with a grain of salt since I wouldn’t say snake was really written to be A Gay Character but regardless the way snake’s gender and overall personality is portrayed is probably one of the best depictions of gay men I’ve ever seen. He’s very pretty, dressed in expensive clothes reminiscent of a prince, with beautiful wavy hair and an air of poise and sophistication. He’s the smartest person in the room and he KNOWS this and he will not hesitate to be a condescending prick. He’s delicate and funny and charming. He has no fear or hesitation about suggesting he and Junpei share a bed or referencing gay sex. All these things tend to make a character the butt of jokes or at the very least regarded as lesser than the other characters but with snake hes the most admired one here. He’s very capable and is in fact so capable he literally needed to be removed temporarily from the situation so that the others could solve the mystery on their own. He’s absolutely fearless, doesn’t care about pissing off Aoi or getting shot multiple times by Ace. He’s fucking strong as hell and is able to survive being shot multiple times and have enough strength to dig his claws into Ace and force them to burn to death together. Everyone loses their shit without him and he’s the key to escape. He’s cool as hell and he fucks severely

[quartztwst]

Wedding in the Clouds! (TWST Fan-Event) (CLOSED)

Happy Valentine’s Day! 💕💕 I finally finished this fan-event for my 3k followers celebration!

Summary of the event:

On one fine day, you recieve a wedding invitation from a mysterious someone named Dione. It says to be a wedding for Azul and QUARTZ?! Wait, don’t they hate eachoth- SUDDENLY, a bright light from the invitation blinds your eyes and you end up on a soft, fluffy cloud. Voices of other people groaning and waking up is heard too. It seems like other students from NRC were also transported here.. But why?

A light pink skinned lady grabs all of the students attention and announces that you all are wedding guests. She introduces herself as Dione, one of the most powerful mages in Twisted Wonderland. Dione’s attitude was very sweet yet it was very conscending like she was running some sort of workplace. Behind her was Quartz and Azul chained by vines from the cloud beneath everyone. They seemed to react accordingly as Quartz was shouting profanties and throwing a whole fit while Azul was trying to focus on the fact he was being embarrassed in front of a quarter of NRC but Quartz’s outburst was irritating him.

As they were taken away, Dione explained to everyone they were to forcibly help set the wedding up for the bride and groom with her bird minions. If anyone refuses, they will be thrown off from the clouds or forced into a prison made of vines. WIth a quick flick of her hand, everyone’s clothes were suddenly changed into wedding attire.

Once Dione left, the students started to split up and find a way to crash the wedding, but not for Quartz and Azul. The thing was…

THEY HAD A DAY OFF TODAY and who wants to spend it on a stupid wedding? They had plans!

Event Information:

There are 4 different operations going on at the same time to ruin the wedding because a lot of the students disagreed in which way to take this. You have an option to draw your OC in which ever operation!!

It looks like from the background that the place has no buildings but there are plenty made by Dione:

A building for the cake and food <- ran by geese

A place for the Bride to get ready in

A place for the Groom to get ready in

Dione’s place located on a cloud that is higher than the other clouds so she can watch over yall

A place where the decorations and necessities for the wedding are being delivered by doves, pelicans, storks <- they are also not weak, they dont play. they will fight back if disrupted)

and then the wedding atlar which is just the background it’s outside so its just the resting area

Quartz’s dress, Bride’s Tower, and delivery birds

Operation 1: Ruin the Wedding

Led by Idia. Objective is to ruin the wedding like destroying the cake, decorations, finding Dione’s weakness, ruining the whole set up, exploding shit idk

Description of the attire: Wedding outfits with a bit of technology accessories by Idia Shroud himself. (the leech twins have one ear bud in but i didn’t draw their ears in detail..) You can get creative with the tech accessories

Operation 2: Save the Bride

Led by my MC/Yuu and Grim (you can also add ur Yuus/Mcs in too!!). Objective is to sneak past the geese guards and save Quartz to stop the wedding.

Description of the attire: Wedding outfit is fine !! but you can get creative with it like “oh heh.. im the maid and uhhh quartz shat herself and i need to help her so let me in” or smth 😭😭😭

Operation 3: Do Nothing/Other

Basically you do nothing. Led by nobody lol. What’s your OC’s objective for doing nothing? Do they want to see the wedding? Do they not care enough because it might be over anyways? Is there no hope?

I didn’t draw anyone here bc it’ll be just wedding attire 😭😭

Operation 4: Steal the Groom

This is for all my Azul likers heh.

Since Azul and Quartz are being rushed to get ready, a lot of clothes are being thrown out and sent back in the boxes laying around so why not reuse them? Maybe you can use it to ruin the wedding and steal Azul’s heart awayy once they’re done dressing him up…..

Description of the Attire: Wedding Bride or Groom outfitss hehee

Rules:

NO weird outfits that sexualizes OCs

Use the tag #WedCloudEvent or tag me if you make a post of this event!!

Please be respectful to everyone’s OCs

You can also draw other TWST characters here if you want!!

Have fun!!

Here’s the background for your OCs!!

List of OCs/Characters:

Operation 1: Ruin the Wedding -

Idia Shroud

Floyd Leech

Jade Leech

Moch by @thatsadguymochi

Daphne by @pomevinelle

Yuya by @cheerleaderman

Akshara by @twistedtalestory

Alastor by @chaotic-snow

Yvonne by @juchioris

Kogane by @kogane-twst

Dimitrios by @twsted-void

Cupid by @nivvetsworld

Neuvins by @lapinhearts

Riddle (design by @lapinhearts)

Airinniz by @hanizmiyu

Kozakura Yuuka by @hanizmiyu

Nyx by @blackcat101

Viva by @evexe

Operation 2: Save the Bride -

My Yuu/MC

Grim

Silly by @sillybillymillyrilly

Silver (design by @0ann3 )

Yu (Yuri Takeba) by @0ann3

Loralyn by @chizramue

Mizuki by @sherryclover

Starr by @astral-pr0jecti0n

Xenon by @w0nd3rhoy

Yuubeni by @bunniehunn

Superstar! And Yuu By @imafrealinrainbow478484

Yukitaka by @yumaandyukitaka

Aki by @rinxleona

Rui by @rinxleona

Pluto by @teddyandmochi

Operation 3: Do Nothing/Other -

AJ by @karamatsuboy-aj

Oisín by @xen-blank

Mama Hua by @lafashionlsta

Yuuko by @silkkorchid

Soul by @twistedplayer16

Operation 4: Steal the Groom -

Rémy by @ranas-twisted-wonderland

Ayesha by @iluvmusicxoxo

Yuura by @a-z-rie-l

Alice by @sinjaangels

Djyuu by @djchik

ANYWAYS this is just an event I made out of my ass HELFP im sorry if theres a whole bunch of holes here 😭😭 and Idia and the Tweels outfits are SUPER SLOPPY so I can’t wait to see how everyone else makes their OCs’ outfits prettier also Quartz and Azul do not like each other here so be free to do anything lol

Happy Valentine’s Day! 💕💕💕🎉🎉🎉🎉

[artdcnaldson]

patrick hive to the rescue because im thinking, as i often do, about friends to lovers with patrick where you're kind of upset because he and art have gotten around and you're still struggling on the dating scene, maybe you're shy, probably you just have standards, and its really just all starting to bug you because you're worked up!!!!! imagine hanging out with patrick during the summer - the room is sticky with humidity, despite the air conditioning being on full blast. you're hot and irritated and sexually frustrated. patrick being half clothed isn't helping, either - you can see the gleam of sweat on his bare chest - the dusking of hair on his thick thighs as he lounges back with a cigarette. you're going mad, it feels like you could detonate at any second your clit is so on fire - throbbing and achey and everytime you press you sweat slick thighs together it makes it worse.

patrick is looking at his phone - so you take the chane - just a small touch - just for some relief. you're on the bed, there's a plushi blocking his view - it cant hurt just to slide a sneaky hand down the band of your shorts and panties. just to stroke your swollen slit. surely he wont noitce if you just...... rub yourself a little. while you sneak glances at his toned body - just peeks, really. if you're very quiet (you do realize the sticky squelch of your cunt can be heard across the room, right? you dont) you might even be able to cum undetected

GODDDDD FUCK!!!! This was supposed to be a chill, normal, short response. Instead I ignored 2 work calls bc it’s that serious.

Rating: E (18+)

Warnings: SMUT (exibitionism/voyeurism, f!masturbation, not fingering but a secret third adjacent thing, extreme levels of horniness)

A/N: Patrick Hive we Linked and Built <3

Patrick thought it was so sweet that you invited him to visit your home for the summer. Apparently you’d sung nothing but his praises to your parents, because even though you were both eighteen, they let him sleep on the floor of your room on a blow up mattress, trusting him that much.

Which was annoying. You weren’t fucking Patrick (not for lack of wanting to), but they could’ve at least given you the benefit of the doubt and assumed that you might have some sort of sexual urges. It made your stupid fucking celibacy that much more embarrassing.

You’re home alone with him and the power’s out— a stupid, heat-induced rolling blackout. The open window only seems to usher in more hot summer air, so you’re both down to as few layers as would be appropriate. You, were down to a thin T-shirt and your panties. Patrick was only in a pair of grey nylon shorts. Sweat was beading down his bare chest, which was so fucking unfair.

Because it was Patrick, whose chest hair and happy trail made your mouth fill with drool any time you were treated to the sight of it. It was summer, and he was frequently shirtless, and you still hadn’t gotten used to the sight. Any sane person would want to lave their tongue along his chest, tasting the sweat and salt of his skin. That was… so totally normal to think about.

Patrick fucked your neighbor— the cute one who was going to a state school so she could be a kindergarten teacher. You didn’t know, but you were pretty sure. You’d been swimming in the pool during a cul-de-sac cookout, and they’d disappeared after a while. Patrick didn’t say anything that night, probably to protect your delicate sensibilities, but you could just kind of sense it.

God, it was unfair. All of the guys your age had girlfriends, or something. And the single ones were cute, but Patrick always seemed to fuck things up for you, either actively, or because you would always wind up talking about him. And because your parents thought it was totally fine for him to sleep in your room, you were surviving off of weak, rushed orgasms in the shower.

It was supposed to be a fun, sexy summer before you went off to college, and Patrick was totally ruining it. How was it fair that he got to fuck around and get his rocks off while you spent your summer feeling like you were wearing a fucking chastity belt?

And you were so wet it was uncomfortable, sticky between your thighs with absolutely no relief. Patrick was sitting on the fucking Air mattress, propped up by your cute, pink pillows and plushies that he’d stolen, watching a rerun of The Hills on MTV. His hand dangled out the open bedroom window so the smell of smoke wouldn’t get stuck in your innocent little bedroom.

He stretched, and you watched with an open mouth as he blew the cigarette smoke out the window. Pretty fucking lips, his muscles all taut as he turned. He looked back at the TV, and you exhaled a shaky breath. Fuck, you were so turned on you wanted to scream. Your pussy was just drooling into your panties, clit throbbing and aching for attention, your entire body felt empty, desperate to be filled up.

You were practically buried in your stuffed animal collection, which was embarrassing on any other day (Patrick had nearly laughed at the sight, but you’d insisted that you couldn’t just throw all of them away… they were nostalgic), but you’d never been more grateful until that moment.

You were already pretty well covered, thanks to the near life size bear sitting beside you— the perfect safety net. Your pulse was thundering in your chest, making you feel a little dizzy with anxiety or arousal, or a strange new mix of both.

You were burning hot between your thighs— throbbing and soaked all sticky and slick. Your legs twitched instinctively as your fingertips dipped into your core, where a pool of your arousal awaited. A shaky gasp escaped you as you moved your slick fingers up to your neglected clit, and you quickly muffled the noise into your pillow

It was like you’d never really touched yourself before. The level of need and desperation within you was completely unknown until that point. Your eyes rolled back as you began grinding up against your fingers. Your teeth dug into your lip to stay quiet as you played with your clit as discreetly as you could.

Patrick shifted to get more comfortable. Flexing his thighs just slightly, rubbing sweaty palms against the muscles there. He ashed his cigarette with his gaze locked on the TV. “This shit is so boring,” he muttered.

And fuck, his voice. You considered arguing with him, just so he’d get louder, and his voice would get more intense, and you’d be able to fuck yourself to completion to the sound of him speaking.

Your poor, neglected pussy clenched around absolutely nothing, begging to be filled by his dick, his fingers, your fingers, a toy, a hairbrush, fucking anything. Your panties were absolutely sodden— drenched to the point of forming a transparent little spot right above your cunt.

If Patrick had looked over, or, if he had unfocused his eyes just right and peered into the reflection of the TV screen, he would’ve been able to make out the sight of your fingers, moving steadily, desperately against your clit. If he had done that.

Your toes curled just slightly, thighs closing around your hand as you got closer and closer. It was loud— just how much you were moving. You needed— god, you needed so much in that moment. You grabbed a random plushie— a pink rabbit that you probably got with that years’ Easter basket— and held it over your lap. Yeah, that worked. Super casual, perfect way to hide the way your hand was working your clit.

And the pressure. Jesus Christ, the pressure of the warm stuffed animal over your cunt was too nice to resist. You’d have to throw it away after, you knew, but you couldn’t help but grind yourself up against it. If you closed your eyes, you could imagine it was his lap, or his thigh, or something warm and soft and hard for you to rut against.

But you couldn’t close your eyes, because you had to watch Patrick. To make sure he didn’t know what you were doing. An arm slung behind his head, the muscles highlighted by the shiny sheen of sweat there. You whimpered pathetically, muffled into the pillows. He probably heard, he pretended he didn’t. It was that level of feigned ignorance that let you keep going.

He probably knew, you could pretend he didn’t. The razor’s edge between you and a much needed, earth-shattering orgasm hinged on that level of ignorance.

So you pathetically humped against your fingers, and the stuffed rabbit, and chased at the bliss that was so fucking close you could taste it like metal on your tongue. Your thighs squeezed around the rabbit as you came, soaking through and making even more of a mess of your panties, and the rabbit, and your sheets, and your fingers.

You hadn’t realized how loud you were breathing. It was like someone had been holding you underwater and you could only just now hear the world with a shocking sense of clarity. Your body felt hot all over, your legs felt like jelly. You hid the stuffed rabbit beneath a discarded blanket, a problem for later. Legs crossed so you could hide the soaked mess between your legs.

Sure, you could play that off.

“You could’ve asked me to leave,” Patrick said around his cigarette. There was a twist to his lips, a sense of amusement. “Nah, you probably didn’t want me to. Too busy eye fucking me while you defiled that poor little bunny.”

He stood, noticeably hard in his shorts, which you weren’t looking at weren’t looking at weren’t looking at. He grabbed your ankles and pulled your legs apart, all while wearing the smug sort of expression that got you to this position in the first place. Really, it was all his fault. His eyes trailed up your legs, to the glistening mess coating your upper thighs, and the sheer mess of your panties.

“Huh.” His hands moved up your thighs and you exhaled shakily, parting them more to accommodate him, whatever he wanted, whatever he was thinking. You could come a thousand more times just for him, at his every whim. But that was the repression talking, not just because of him.

Your breath caught as his fingers hooked into the waistband of your panties and he peeled them down. His expression held the same sort of concentration that you saw him exhibit on the court. Focused on you, it made your heart pound.

“No wonder you were so loud, huh?” He teased, fingers gliding through your slit. It was embarrassing how wet you were, coating his fingers and palm in your arousal. Each light brush against your clit made your thighs twitch, made a desperate keen escape you. “I could hear it the second you started, by the way. But even before that, I could fucking smell how turned on you were. You could’ve said something, you know. I would’ve taken care of you, made it real nice.”

You moaned softly, eyes wide as you peered up at him. When he removed his hands from your pussy you fucking whined— pouting as he held his fingers up to the light and grinned at the glistening mess left behind. You watched those fingers disappear between plush lips, tongue sweeping out to clean them up. His cock jumped behind the shorts he wore from want.

“It doesn’t have to mean anything,” you insisted, sitting up to rub him through the fabric. “It’s hot, we’re both horny and bored. Just use me. It’ll feel nice.”

He didn’t take much convincing. He’d been rubbing his dick raw on that stupid fucking inflatable mattress every night when you were asleep anyway. How could he not? You were just too adorable.

@poppy-metal your mind amazes me no words no thoughts just this <3 thank youuuuuu for this in my inbox it truly kept me fed

[yunazxxx]

who do you think is the roughest in katseye?

the roughest in katseye… huh lets see

i wanna start off with sophia, because she really screams that she would HEAVILY contradict her own words. let me give you an example.

lets say you and sophia were having a nice time together, but you were doing things you knew was testing her patience. sophia was known for being so patient, but here you were making her grit her teeth and try to calm down every second.

sophia had never really, you know, been pissed in front of you but here you were feeling her energy switch. she would just look at you, sophia wasn’t one to be too rough physically.

once she got you where she wanted you, thats when she’d praise you, which was normal. your body reacting to everything she said, but then she’d begin degrading you in the same sentence.

she’d do this so often because she loved mind fucking you. it was her favorite thing, seeing you getting confused, unsure whether she was serious or not about the things she’d say, calling you her “dirty slut” but in the same sentence saying you’re so beautiful.

now of course we have, megan / manon

when it comes to megan, i don’t know i feel like shes not too rough with you, but she would definitely be so smug if shes able to get you below her.

like for instance —

you two were play wrestling, or just tussling around one day and you’re on top of her, you tease her and whatnot, per usual but she gets you on your back

and then next thing you know she’s smirking and smiling about it, calling you little things like “weak” but knowing how fast you could just shut her up she enjoys it.

but for manon, hmmm —

manon doesn’t seem like she’d be rough with you, honestly i don’t know maybe its her being a cancer or just her personality in general but i don’t see her ever being rough with you??

like if she ever got rough with you, she’d feel so bad right after like her heart would start aching and everything (my baby </3)

but for lara and daniela. — now lets get lara out the way first, because

i dont know what it is with lara and marking but i feel like she’d love to give you new marks every single time.

of course if you get her to that point, she’d always make sure you’re in pain once she’s done with you but she’s also kinda like a sophia.

she’d contradict so much she says, it’ll start with “i won’t be too hard with you” and then next thing you know, you’re waking up to her smiling to you while you’re in a warm bath after you passed out.

now daniela, the one who i PERSONALLY. believe to be the roughest out of all the katz.

now theres times where she’d play around and be like, “oh i didn’t know it would hurt that bad” but wouldn’t be soft with you.

daniela loved playing the “not knowing” act, knowing she’d keep doing it continuously. loving how red your skin would get, or how much louder you are when she was harder with you.

now, when she was mad it was actually different. she wouldn’t play the whole “not knowing” role, she’d purposely hurt you and would even degrade you.

if you tried begging or crying, pleading with her, anything she’d just mock you and bring up how you ended up in this situation in the first place.

[portraitofalinkonfyre]

I’m literally going feral over ur fierce deity fics I’ve been dehydrated for so long and these are like a tall glass of water

Could I pretty please with a cherry on top request a Fierce Deity x reader where Like theyre Just hanging out together and fierce is just really gently putting flowers in the readers hair and they’re watching the sunset together and fierce just thinks the reader is really pretty while they’re yapping about their day

THANK YOU SO MUCH IN ADVANCE IF YOU DO DECIDE TO DO THIS BUT YOU DONT HAVE TO <333

CONSIDER IT WRITTEN. Fierce Deity is literally my weakness, so I'm ecstatic more people love him!

Braided Daisies

Pairing: Fierce Deity x Reader

Warning(s): Tooth-rotting fluff and philosophical discussions that probably shouldn't be read before one's morning coffee.

Masterlist

There was a clearing a mile's walk from your house. It was small and quiet, filled to the brim with tall, swaying grass. In early spring, a myriad of flowers bloomed among the vegetation, as if sprinkled by the gods themselves. But its best feature was by far its proximity to a staggering, craggy cliff, and the accompanying view that followed for anyone lucky enough to stumble upon it.

"—And THEN I told him I don't make the rules around here, but nooo," you ranted to the Fierce Deity from your sprawled position on the grass. You had originally intended to come here alone, but it seemed you had an adventurer in your midst. That, and the fact that it was becoming increasingly hard to refute him when he looked at you with such... care? Want? You weren't quite sure, but from the looks the other boys would shoot him, you assumed it was deep. "—of course I look rich enough to be the owner... in my work uniform!"

"That is... unfortunate," mused the deity, looking almost offended. When his gaze turned menacing, you realized you probably shouldn't have shared your troubles with a literal guard dog of a god. "If you require assistance—"

"Nope, nope, nope," you waved your hands frantically. "I am not dealing with you mauling someone."

The put-off expression on his face would have made you cackle if you hadn't known his offer was very much real. "Shame."

Shame?!

"I'll stop baking if you kill someone," you leveraged, holding back the urge to laugh when his expression turned to one of abject horror, then what you could only assume was his version of a pouty face. "Don't look at me like that, I will do it."

There was silence as you held his gaze, setting your jaw in what you hoped was a stern expression. Miraculously, Fierce was the first to break eye contact, leaning back on his arms with a deep sigh. "You are brave," he said, and there was something soft in his tone that you couldn't place for the life of you. "Have you always been this way?"

It was such a him question, yet you had to stop and process why in the world the Fierce Deity wanted to know something so mundane about you, a mere mortal. It couldn't have been genuine curiosity... but there was no other explanation. "I... maybe? It depends on your definition of bravery, I guess."

"And what is yours?" He was getting closer, practically casting a shadow over you. A callused hand drew forward, capturing a strand of your hair, rubbing softly, and the notion that he was feeling your hair threw you for the greatest loop of your life.

"Bravery is..." you trailed off, averting your eyes. What was bravery? To say one had bravery meant they had a strong character... some could even say a heroic one, but it felt too simple an answer to give to such a being, especially when he gazed down at you with a warmth you hadn't felt in a long time. Not even the burning tangerine of the horizon—smattered with flashes of gold and honeysuckle— could ignite your skin in the way his eyes could. "...immediate."

Impossibly, the deity leaned closer, tone expectant. "Immediate?"

Fuck, he was practically on top of you. "I-It's not like courage, because that comes slow and is more moral based, but..." you gulped. "I guess bravery is what happens in the moment, as in the choices you make when there's no time to make them."

"I see," rumbled Fierce as he withdrew, resuming his cross-legged position next to you. As if on instinct, you raised yourself onto your elbows and huffed.

"Why do you even want to know?" you questioned, emboldened by the falling sun. "You're a god and I'm just... human. I'm sure there's a million more interesting things out there."

"You speak as though my curiosity is an insult," intoned the deity, gaze fixed on the bleeding horizon. "I can assure you, it is not."

And that was all there was to it, really. You knew the topic had died as soon as he fell silent, though it didn't mean you were giving up just yet. You reached out, picked a nearby daisy, and offered it to him. "Can you braid?"

"Excuse me?"

"You said you wanted to discover," you defended lightly, even though there was no need to. "Hair braiding is easy when you get the hang of it, but it's a lot easier to learn using someone else's hair."

A beat passed, and you thought for sure he was going to reject the idea. That is, until his hand twitched up to take the flower, examining it with keen eyes. You took it as an invitation to scoot closer—already parting your hair in preparation—until your legs brushed his own and your chests were nary two feet apart. "Okay," you relinquished the flower and put the head at the top of the braid. "You're going to want to cover it with one section like so, then keep braiding like you normally would without letting the stem fall, capiche?" You held up the half finished braid for inspection, eventually pulling it apart and offering him the flow. "Now you try!"

There was determination in the Fierce Deity's eyes as he relinquished the flower and did as instructed: laying the head at the top of the brain and incorporating it with every cross and pull. His touch was so gentle you could have mistaken it for the wind pulling your hair, and you wondered it he feared anything harder than featherlight pressure would shatter you, though that was most certainly not the case. Before you knew it, he had reached the bottom of the strands, and was merely holding it as to not fall apart. You took that as a cue to snap a hair tie on that sucker and shoot him a happy grin. "It looks great, awesome job!"

But the Fierce Deity remained silent, simply gazing at you with eyes softer than silk before rising to his feet. You tilted your head in confusion, about to ask where he was going, when he bent down, plucked another daisy from the earth, and plopped down behind you. "What are you—"

A heavy hand laid itself on your shoulder, applying gentle, firm pressure as the deity's voice rumbled in your ear. "Be still, I am only using the skills you have shown me."

And, without preamble, he sectioned your hair like a pro and began to braid while you sort of just sat there, questioning everything that had lead up to this point. He was so close that you could feel the press of his muscled abdomen against your very unmuscled back, and it was doing unspeakable things to the beating organ in your chest. A sort of choked gasp left your lips when he reached down to capture your wrist before pulling a hair tie from it, but you forced yourself into silence—he seemed to enjoy it, so who were you to deny him—?

"Have I upset you?" Came Fierce's voice, clear as day. His actions with your hair halted, and you nearly morned the loss of his body heat when he pulled away.

"I— what?" How in the world could he have upset you? There was simply no way.

"You are quiet," answered the deity, as if it made perfect sense. "I ask again: have I upset you?"

"No?" You could hardly comprehend how he came to such a conclusion, but you would do everything in your power to rectify whatever misunderstanding he was living under. "How does that have anything to do with me being upset?"

"You talk when you are happy," and he noticed?? Did he think you were upset because you weren't rambling?

"Well, yes," dear lord, he was too precious. "But I can be happy in silence, too."

"Ah," you felt a wave of relief when his hands fell on the braid again, lifting it for what you could only guess was inspection. "I had assumed you disliked quiet."

"Funny, because I thought the same."

"Then it appears we both assumed wrong," stated the deity, and you couldn't have agreed more.

The fading light was filled with laugher as you regaled him with more stories from work, throwing in a few embarrassing childhood ones when things became dry. During this, Fierce fitted two more braids into your hair, each with a different flower. You could hardly wait to look in the mirror when you arrived home, an idea that seemed less and less pleasant as your conversation dragged on.

When the sun was all but a speck in a sea of navy, you reluctantly started the trek back, noting how insignificant the darkness seemed when you had Fierce by your side, expression attentive as he listened to you talk about nothing in particular. It puzzled you how he seemed to hang off of every word, but you assumed it was merely loneliness. Had it been lighter outside, or your attention sharper, you would have noticed the crimson flush painting his cheeks a deeper red than the very horizon.

The plot got away from me a bit, but I still think it turned out great. Hope y'all enjoyed!

[alien-til-i-stage]

so something i dont see much online is how similar hyuna and luka actually are.

When we meet Hyuna, we get introduced to how upbeat and her free spirited personality, both in how she acts and in the song.

This in particular speaks almost in entirely of freedom and the desire for it. She sings about living her life for her and “a bird set free”. As obvious from her being rebel, everything points to how she desires freedom from the aliens and control over how she lives her life. We can also see this in a comic where she says the reason she enjoys singing is because on the stage she’s the one in control.

Already from a young age, control is something she has wanted, over her own life and her performances. And for her saying this, I think its even more interesting if we look back at All In. The majority the song takes place both in a bar where Hyuna is singing or the mission both Hyuna and Mizi are doing.

We already know that Hyuna likes to sing to feel the control over the stage when she’s there but I find it interesting that, yet again, the entirety of the episode was her demonstrating her freedom and control. There were even moments with her on stage remembering Luka and Hyunwoo and continuing to frantically continue singing as if trying to run away from them.

This could mean that rather than her just singing out of enjoyment of her control, she’s on that stage for the control. Almost like she’s desperately clinging onto that feeling to remind herself that she’s not weak, to run away from her helplessness as a child. Another reason for her to be on as many missions as she was shown to be, maybe another way to prove to herself she has the control and power now, not the aliens.

we can continue to see mentions of her trying to escape her memories in the song “Drunk and Party” as she says “I don’t wanna go back, everybody listen.”

Essentially Hyuna uses her own stage as a way to regain her control as well as her missions. Which is where Luka comes in.

In the same comic where Hyuna speaks about control on the stage, we see Luka as an adult on the stage as well, most likely during the 49th season.

It looks almost like hes remembering Hyuna’s words from when they were both children, which indicates that Hyuna’s reponse effected him.

In an interview about round 5, someone asked why Luka imitated Sua, and here is the response that was given.

Its told that Luka does this, not to win, but to feel control and dominance. Unlike Hyuna, who has many ways to feel this way and demonstrates it in almost every way of her lifestyle, this is the only way for him to do so. He is literally a puppet except for when he’s on stage.

The reason for Hyuna’s response being so important to him is likely that Hyuna’s attitude about singing effected his own. In the comic, kid Luka seemed curious about Hyuna finding control on the stage, showing that at that point Luka didn’t view the stage the same, so its likely that after their talk, Luka began to view the stage as a way to control.

This is how the two of them are similar, yet opposites. They both desire control and dominance in their lives and dedicate themselves to it, yet while Hyuna lives a life where she can easily do that, she feels no need to hurt others in order to do so, rather able to choose to help them as a way to feel powerful, but Luka doesn’t have that same choice. He lives life as a puppet, with no other way for control. His only way to feel in control is on the stage, so he takes his chance to and hurts the other contestant, purposely trying to hurt them as much as possible just because he can.

I truly believe that had their situations been reversed, where Luka was instead the purpose who got to leave while Hyuna stayed behind, theres a chance they couldve had completely different lifestyles. I also believe that they also, in a way, represent each path Till could take. If he were to stay in alien stage for the next season, would he turn out like Luka, someone who hurt others to feel in control, or if he was able to run away and become a rebel would he distract himself from his pain and constantly chase after that feeling of finally being free?

idk i just really like hyuna and luka

[calculatedklown]

It's completely baffling that Gortash is the only one of the chosen three with whom we don't get to have any dialogue regarding the information we uncover about him.??

Spoiler warning maybe lol

Like with Orin, we can mention her upbringing or the fact that she's a child of incest. Try to convince her that she's just been abused her whole life? Like obviously this changes nothing in the end. But it still matters that its mentioned.

Ketheric, we also can try and convince him to change his ways. Mention his wife, his religion, Isabelle. Literally mention everything we find out to try and convince him to turn a new leaf. Which also doesn't change any outcome. But I appreciate that its there.

But GORTASH??? We get absolutely NOTHING, it's absurd! It's baffling that we can't even touch on his backstory—like finding his parents,(possibly killing them depending on what you do) being sold to Raphael as a child, or the fact that he was scammed at one point. All the intriguing details we uncover about him lead to nowhere, and it's so annoying 😩

Like this isn't even just because I enjoy him as a character. It just seems like such a missed opportunity to find out more about him currently as a person!

The dialogue we encounter while trying to convince Ketheric and Orin reveals a profound insight into their true characters. Their reactions are telling and provide a unique perspective on who they are as individuals!

Ketheric fully recognizes the person he has become. He understands that he is a lost cause, fully acknowledging the wrongs he has committed and the irreparable damage he has caused. He accepts his fate without hesitation. Despite your words.

Orin lashes out in denial, and becomes completely manic (more so than her usual self). Completely baffled and distraught.

I want to know how Gortash would react if you brought up his parents or his childhood! It's a possibility he wouldn't be grateful if you slayed his parents; in fact, he would likely view any sympathy as a weakness and respond with anger or dismissiveness. Plus, we’ll never find out his true response to Durge after you say, “I always liked you.”

“Is that what you-”

I don't understand these missed opportunities with him?? Like I get keeping some ambiguity to an extent. Its why we will never get a clear answer into him and durges relationship…..BUT I WOULD LIKE A CRUMB OF HIM PLEASE!! I DONT EVEN NEED A KISSY SCENE! I JUST WANT ANY INSIGHT INTO HIS OWN OPINION ON HIS PAST IF ITS MENTIONED!

If you read all of this rambling…..please tell me what YOU think his possible response would be to any of these scenarios lmao please

[000410]

kotoko's manipulation of es

bringing this into the maintags..i wouldnt call this analysis but ive been spiraling about this for too long. for the record kotoko is my favorite. i love her.

t1- john doe/task

you could call this the Save The Cat trope. kotoko is both setting herself up and the narrative is setting her up to be admired for saving es's life(and later her saving lucky in harrow). we have to remember that kotoko snuck in for the express purpose of saving es, because she thought mikoto was suspicious. and she WAS right, but notably she let john attack es... for a while. then she stepped in to save them. and immediately brags about it. she will then continue to bring this up as a benefit to being es's fangs.

theres also the end scene which i still have a hard time parsing BUT it is a sort of breakdown she makes es have and then laughs about it

t2- yonah

the hug, we all know the hug. kotoko insults es, calling them useless and weak (Much to think about.) and then when they break down, acting more like a scared child is when she switches to comforting them gently and telling them "its okay!" and Very Importantly she hugs them when they tell her to let them go.

t3- speculation

based on her t3 quotes, and jackalopes own words, we can believe that kotoko now feels betrayed and thinks of es as her enemy...... Maybe. she's also clearly trying to do the exact same things she's Been doing this whole time.

kotokos way of manipulation seems to be to hurt es in some way and then come in to present herself as a hero, a knight in shining armor gallantly saving them-- which worked once and almost worked on es again.

kotoko says that she wanted to punish the prisoners with her own hands. this is obvious about her she is the long awaited hero shes different than the other prisoners shes the wardens fangs. shes strong and is the only one who can save the world or something.

(translations from milgram-en)

But Then. She Says Something.

This. This is what shes been doing this whole time. she hurts es- she lets them get beat up, she makes them cry, she is the main reason two people died. then she tries to save them. affirm me and i will return your anger and pain To Whoever Did This To You. not her!

we dont know if she will say these exact lines in her voice drama, but i think i know what she's going to try to do.

[ender-cloud]

Jasper really said men will do anything but go to therapy…

Tgs spoilers under cut

I kinda said all I had to about the Lodgers in the last update but to repeat; what Jekyll did is impressive, not shameful. Even if it wasnt exactly how he planned it to turn out it is still something no one thought could be done. They are all scientists, they know how impressive this achievement is.

I completely forgot about the police, this is more than just Hyde it is very possible that this may affect many members of the society.

Also Thick accent Jekyll mention??? I need more of his accent so bad

It is clear that this wasnt on purpose, but that Jekylls DNA is so out of whack, in a way it seems like the potions kept it under control and let it not get to out of hand.

Also did anyone else find it interesting that it’s still Jekyll? Yes I know this has happened before but it seems like Jekylls anxiety is what turned him intro Hyde here.

Maybe thats what makes them more connected now, Jekyll is acting like Hyde, he has the same fears and it is showing with how his body is reacting. They aren’t fighting for control, but it instead seems like their mind and body have gotten so used to acting a certain way with a certain part that its a natural swap.

Jekylls anxiety also worsened when he turned into Hyde, as though he had all of this bubbling inside him and had to change to let it all out, in a disgusting metaphoric a Yet physical way.

I dont think Jekyll said all of theae things because he transformed into Hyde, but just because he had to tell someone and couldn’t keep it inside anymore. Even though he clearly didn’t want to do it infront of so many people, something must’ve been telling him he has too.

YES JASPER! YOU GO KING! I LOVE THAT YOUR IN YOUR SELF CONFIDENCE ERA.

Jasper still dosent have his coat, which means that Rachel is still outside, or she might be there too, and I think she could be help in talking to Jekyll.

What Jasper is saying probably hits Jekyll deep, because he is right. This whole thing started 2 years ago because Jekyll didn’t like parts about him, it started because he wasnt able to ask for help, because he didnt want to show Weakness.

Showing weakness is something that no one wants to do, but really, sometimes its for the best. Its seen throughout TGS how Jekyll hides whats bothering him, what makes him weak, when he was close to a heart attack for example.

It is also seen with Hyde, it seems like Hyde wasn’t as much of a experiment to get rid of the bad, but an escape from the side of being perfect.

Jekyll just needs help, he needs to accept that its ok to show weakness, its ok to not always be strong, its ok to not be perfect.

To learn and grow Jekyll needs to accept himself and he has so many people who are so much more than willing to help.

Jasper, Rachel, Lanyon, they are all there for him. He seemed so happy and relieved when he told frankenstine the truth, imagine how things would be different if he could open up to all of them.

[kissami]

YOU’RE THE GOOD AND I’M THE BAD

part two

SUM: you always had a tough relationship with your family, favoritism was a big thing and we all know you were the last pick in the cherry field. Katsuki though…you were his favorite thing. Katsuki then has a moment of weakness crack through his strong exterior.

WARNINGS: family issues, thoughts of self doubt, cute katsuki, then shifts to depressed katsuki QUICCCKKK!

femreader! with she/her pronouns!

author’s note at the end of this :3

series masterlist

"I DONT THINK I've ever seen anything like this before.

Keeping her eyes still on the cereal box, Y/N ignored the way her parents were gawking at the flowers that stood all dried up and old in a water bottle near the windows of the kitchen.

"They seem pretty dead to me." She chewed her food throughly, swallowing down slowly as her parents ignored her, keeping their attention on her sister.

"How is it possible for a dead flower to create a new one in a plastic bottle...last night when I brought it out I didn't see anything strange with it but as soon as I was going to throw it out, I noticed the new stems."

Y/N couldn't help but feel a sense of annoyance when her sister spoke.

Her sister annoyed her to the core no matter what she did. Maybe it was because she grew up with her older sister getting everything handed to her or maybe just the way she spoke sort of ticked her off. Like an annoying bug you can’t get rid of because you can’t find it so it’s endless buzzing continues in your space, almost in a mocking way.

"It's like new beginnings can happen anywhere, you know? This little rose was so close to dying, but this little new flower will continue its legacy."

"Oh my gosh, how much more cliche can you get? It's a fucking flower, it's natural for it to grow. Stop getting into your little dramatic theories all the time with stuff like this."

Y/N spat, placing her spoon down as she watched the way her sister bit back her remark, because deep down she knew exactly how her parents would react.

Her mother gasped, obviously shocked that her quiet child would speak like that to her poor sweet daughter who said something so beautiful.

"What the hell is wrong with you?"

The younger girl held back the urge to roll her eyes as she got up and walked back upstairs to her room.

Y/N was a smart and gentle girl, but the people she lived with made it impossible for her to be truly happy.

She was used to it at this point. She would get lectured over every little thing wether it be wrong or right. Hiding away in her room was what made her feel less insane but they still had something to say about that.

"You never talk with us anymore. You're shutting us out so much, do you not love us anymore? Am I a bad mother to you?"

Every time her mother said that, it resulted in her getting yelled at by her drunk father to stop being such a burden and a bitch to her mother while her sister was busy else where.

When can I finally be happy?

Flopping onto her bed, she snuggled deeper into her sheets as a few tears went down her plump cheeks.

This poor 17 year old girl was truly going through it. Her father was rarely home but when he was, he would always remind her how miserable their lives became ever since she was born.

They were always low on money and could barely afford some things, but while her sister was busy buying things for her own benefit, Y/N was busy trying to meet ends meet, yet she was still the burden of the family.

It wasn't fair how easily her sister gotten their love. They sacrificed so much money just for her sister to throw away the things they've gotten her the next day.

She just wanted to feel like she was appreciated or cared for. Wasn't it her parents' job to support her? Her father's job to protect her from any harm but here he is, hurting her the most before any man ever did.

Didn't her mother have to give her advice on her future and given compassion that she will make it far in life instead of being shamed for being a bit (bigger/smaller) than everyone else around her and that no man would ever love her?

And her sister, wasn't her sister supposed to be her best friend who would be there no matter what? But here she is, getting backstabbed by her own flesh and blood.

Y/N was getting so exhausted. Her life was barely starting, and she was already considering leaving so soon.

Am I too...much of a burden to be loved, even by my own family?

Y/N flinched from a rough knock on her window, making her sit up and fix herself up as she saw who it was.

"Katsuki what the hell are you doing here? If my parents find out you're here..."

"Babe, shut up and let me kiss you."

❁ ❁ ❁

Katsuki groaned as he felt something slam into his stomach which resulted in him staggering back.

"Oh my! I'm so sorry, Mr! Oh wait, mama look!!! It's Mr. Dynamight!"

Katsuki looked down and sighed a bit as he saw a young girl in her tweens looking up at him in awe.

"Can I get your autograph,sir?"

"Kassie what did I say about being disrespectful. I'm so sorry, Dynamight."

He shook his head at the mother and signed the girl's journal.

He felt his heart stop as he saw it was one of (Y/N)’s books, her signature being right next to where the girl wanted katsuki to write.

Katsuki blocked out the people’s voices completely as he felt his chest rise up and down, a single tear leaving his eye which he quickly wiped away.

"Here kid." He passed the beautiful book that he had millions of, hidden away in his office, back to the little girl and quickly fled the scene.

As he walked back to his agency, he continued to feel the heavy ache in his heart.

No matter how much time had passed and the years flew by since the incident, he still heavily mourned for his first love every single time someone mentioned her.

It was stupid he thought. She was famous, he was famous, people asking him about her was bound to happen, or situations like this where he catches a glimpse of her book that wasn’t one that he owned, having to relive that she was taken so soon. She had so much to live for, her story just began.

He found it unfair how she could finish so many incredible stories yet never could finish her own.

He felt so selfish right now. He still couldn't move forward even if he had someone important in his life now and even a child of his own.

He will and always will be hers.

author’s note: well well well…hi. LOL. Sorry I haven’t updated this series in almost a year!! Holy fuck. I’m really sorry you guys, I lost inspo and just felt so lazy to edit this, but she’s here! I swear on my skittles I will get my shit together and update this series. I never realized so many ppl remembered it from my wattpad days?? That’s insane?? Thank you my pookies,I’ll try to update every week but really it just depends on how I’m feeling :3 anyways, enjoy amor mío!

[spidermanifested]

speaking of transfem interpretations for characters presented as men in the source material. one such case i have been stewing in my mind for a while is black sails charles vane

which i realize (hence the big post about it) would probably not be most peoples first assumption because vane is very stereotypically masculine on first blush. youve got the whole rugged individualist sigma male thing going on, the growly voice the immaculately shaped stubble, etc. but: as the show goes on we get more insight into WHY he presents himself that way and it becomes more and more clear that there are two (well, three but we'll get there) major reasons for this

1) his father figures' enduring influence (the conflicting desires to both appease and outdo them, to different levels for each, but both sides of which can only be achieved by performing masculinity The Best),

and 2) the practical need, as a pirate, to be respected and feared by the men following him,

both of which can be boiled down to "we live in a society". and on their own i would just take these parts of his character as an exploration of how gender roles are socially mandated and reinforced, but, unusually for this type of character, he seems very matter-of-fact and self-aware about the reasons hes Doing Masculinity. this is one of his parallels with flint, whos also consciously spinning his motivations through a narrative of cishet machismo to achieve respectability under patriarchy.

obviously to some degree vane IS shown to have internalized the bioessentialist 18th century england view of gender roles ("i can understand a womans desire for domesticity", etc) (and even still! you CAN understand it? interesting wording!). but he doesnt express things like this remotely as often as, say, jack, who repeatedly goes full throttle Boomer Wifejokes Mode when he feels undermined or slighted by a woman, even one he cares about. in contrast vane is quick to empathize with and relate to and even (especially!) project onto the women in his life. he strikes up a weird rapport with abigail; max, a total stranger to him, gets past his selfish crew-appeasing decision to keep her prisoner by appealing to their similarities. its not just that hes attracted to women (though he obviously very much is), he views them as people who are Similar To Him. maybe more similar than men?

the biggest example is his whole relationship with eleanor. hes CONSTANTLY pointing out how alike they are, how much they hate being oppressed by fathers, aka by men. arent you tired of being tied down by gendered expectations? dont you just want to go apeshit? hes constantly trying to pull her out of this box society has built around her but also hyperaware of and seemingly resigned to his OWN box. he identifies with and lives vicariously through her rebellion. shes his strongest and most genuine emotional connection, and not in a woodes rogers "grieving my beloved unlawfully-wedded wife. what do you mean she was a real person who didnt just sit in the corner and knit silently" way, but like, For Real. even if they were ultimately so incredibly bad for each other.

which brings us to the third secret reason he performs masculinity so hard. that connection, his bonds with women (like flint and the Witch Puppetmaster Rumors about miranda) is repeatedly shown to be considered by the men around him to be a weakness– one that might need forcibly correcting if he ever falters from peak masculinity even a little. hes only allowed to continue to explore that side of himself via the narrow avenues of male heterosexuality and social dominance– his actual relationship with eleanor is very equal, he has no desire to dominate her, or... anyone, really? hes super big on just letting his crew do what they want (to the extent where this winds up causing severe issues). but his ability to lead men requires that he put on the show. and even still, he never seems willing to sacrifice the part of his life with eleanor in it no matter how much pressure is exerted on him from men above or below him in the pecking order. SHE is always the one who winds up abandoning him for HER goals.

shes ultimately too caught up on the lie of finally achieving respectability. and, vane is too, just from a different facet of society. his character arc is about confronting that desire, reckoning with it, and discarding it, choosing to follow flint instead of blackbeard.

(meanwhile we have eleanor falling back on the patriarchys narrative in order to dehumanize him before his execution, even though she ALSO grew up without a mothers love. theyre the same, but through her privilege and adjacency to even more privileged men, shes been given all the tools she needs to deny it– at the cost of boxing herself further into her own role. a cost she chooses to pay every time, no matter how much she claims to hate it.)

theres just...... a whole lot of really good commentary about gender in this show. other characters have their own ways of exploring it but normally their sense of displacement within the gender binary is via the lens of queer sexuality, whereas vane is judged mainly for having a relationship to womanhood that goes BEYOND sexual attraction. and i think that while this part of the narrative stands strong on its own without it, a transfem reading would add some fun new layers and make a lot of sense. and i would love to know if anyone else has had the thought that hrt could have. well maybe not saved her. but definitely Helped

my final miscellaneous piece of analysis, is that aside from that one clothes-on nut-and-bolt between miranda and the pastor, which lasted ~5 seconds so it doesnt count. the only mutually passionate sex scenes shown happening on screen, either(?) involve two women, or a woman and charles vane. & like im just saying. for consistencys sake. we could just resolve that one outlier real quick

[st5rni]

BACK TO YOU

matthew sturniolo fan fiction

WARNINGS : smut, angst if you squint, ex to lovers

*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ

*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ

after a long night of playing board games with the triplets in their living room, everyone begins to get bored and pack it all up.

"i'll sleep on the couch," you say, not wanting to intrude on any of their rooms. it's been a while since you've seen all three of them, especially after you and matt broke up, so everything seems to be a bit hesitant.

chris puts his arm around your shoulder, "nah thats fine, sleep in the guest bedroom upstairs. we usually have madi or nate stay in there when they come over, so you can temporarily take their place." he insists, giving you his best smile despite being half asleep.

"okay, that works." you agree, standing up and yawning, "which way is it?" trying to remember which floor the guest bedroom is on.

"its the room next to mine." matt says, "you remember, right? you went in the guest bedroom once while trying to find your way to my room when we first moved here." he laughs a bit as he says this, reflecting on that time. back when you two were still together.

you stare at him for a moment before answering, "yeah, um, i remember." you say awkwardly, tucking your hair behind your hair and tying it up so your hands have something to do besides pick at your hangnails. the whole room is quiet now, the tension being very clear to all four of you.

matt fiddles with his rings, "uh, okay goodnight." he says before speed walking away to his room as quickly as he could.

"you two make things so awkward." nick says bluntly while he puts up the uno cards, "like why are you both still like this? just get back together." nick suggests with a snark, chris nodding in agreement.

you feel a blush grow on your cheeks, not sure if from embarrassment or not, "you think he'd want to? i don't know i just felt like he was over it by now. i fucked our relationship up." you admit, trying to sound casual about it, and not as desperate for him as you actually are.

"do i think?" nick laughs, "he wears the horse necklace you bought him almost everyday, even in videos. he still has photos of you two on his desk. he's more in love with you than he was before the breakup, i think." he says with a shrug, lowering his voice a bit so matt doesnt overhear

chris jumps in, "i mean.. why did you two break up, anyways? he never wanted to talk about it." his words had hesitance to them, like he was scared it'd break you if he asked.

"i broke up with him because of the distance, but now i-" you pause your words, wondering if you should tell them now, "i.. i was planning on waiting to tell you guys this but, um, im moving to LA. we have a deposit on a house and everything."

"NO WAY??" chris practically screams before running to give you a hug that even nick joins, "that's great!! why do you seem so like, upset about it?" chris questions, genuinely confused on why you didn't even smile when telling them the news.

you put your face in your hands, "it's embarrassing. i can't even tell you guys- just.. it's stupid." you try and stray away from the LA conversation, not wanting to admit you moved here primarily to try and get closer with matt again, "do you think he'd want to ever.. get back together? or, like, at least talk about it?"

"i mean, i think so?" nick says, some doubt in his words, "i dont know about getting back together, it.. hit him pretty hard." he admits, crossing his arms as he says that, knowing he shouldn't be telling you what he is.

you nod, words not able to form properly anymore, "okay.. uh, goodnight guys." you decided it was best to end the conversation here before you cried in front of them. something you'd never hear the end of. giving them a weak smile, you walk to the guest bedroom you'd be sleeping in.

while you go up there stairs, you reconsider the conversation with nick.

maybe there's just the slightest chance he would ever want you back. but honestly? it was likely the opposite. after you'd hurt him so badly, it only makes sense for him to hate you. you don't even blame him, either.

that thought hurt more than anything, and you needed an answer to whether it was true or not.

you look at the two doors in front of you, knowing one is matts room and the other is the guest bedroom. you could drop everything now, leave matt alone, and completely remove him from your life.

..but you love him too much to not have that closure. you need a final answer.

slowly, you open up his door and peak through the sliver of it, looking in his room.

there matt was.

he was on his bed, shirtless and sweating. his eyes were shut and he was practically panting as he was jerking himself into his own hand.

"fuck, fuck- fuck." you hear him muttering under his breath, and with just your luck, you lean on the door, causing it to accidentally open more than you meant to, causing him to look up and see you staring at him, "FUCK!" he yells, before covering himself with his blanket.

"SORRY— IM SORRY!" you yell back, slamming the door closed immediately after. "shit." you whisper to yourself, recollecting what just happened.

just seeing that. fuck, you had forgotten how much he turns you on.

a couple minutes pass by, matt opens the door, his face flushed and hair messy, still not entirely calmed down yet. he runs a hand through his hair and clears his throat. "um, sorry. whats up?" he tries to ignore the awkward situation lingering in both of their minds.

you clear your throat, and start fidgeting with your fingers, "can we- um, can we talk?" you ask, also still trying to recover. that was not something you'd just forget about. ever. "please?"

"what?" he stutters, "i mean, sure. yeah, come in." he clears the door so you can walk in his room, "its kind of messy, sorry."

you look around matts room, noticing how things were different, but still familiar, "you rearranged things." you state, mainly talking to yourself, still observing.

suddenly you remember what nick said, and look towards his desk and see the photos of you two framed sitting there, exactly where they had always been.

"so.." matt starts, "what'd you want to talk about?" he asks, once again fiddling with his rings.

"oh," you had almost forgot, "i just.. fuck this is gonna sound stupid. um. matt, do you— um... i should have thought about this before i came here." you blush, now embarrassing yourself.

he tries to give you a smile, but fails, "its okay. you can sit down if you want." he offers, sitting down on his bed to try and make you more comfortable towards the idea.

you look at him, and just admire him. how could someone be this sweet? "thank you." you say, accepting the offer while you sit down next to matt. probably closer than you should, "matt do you hate me?" you spit out, trying to get it out of the way.

"what?" he asks softly, almost like the question offended him. "thats a joke, y/n." he scoffs.

"im serious!" you insist, looking directly at him, "i know what i did was fucking horrible, and unfair, and selfish. and i never should have done it but—"

matt interrupts you, standing up, "Y/N what are you talking about? you broke up with me. if anyone hates anyone, its you who hates me." he thinks for a second, "i wish i hated you." he says in a quiet voice, but it had some harshness to it.

"matt, no!" you immediately refute, standing up as well, "i care about you— i promise i care. its all ive been thinking about for months. i mean, fuck, i miss you matt. im still in love with you. i never stopped."

"thats not fair and you know it, y/n." matt turns his face from you, "i have been waiting that maybe there was a chance we could ever try again and as soon as im coming to terms that it wont happen you pull this shit. im not going to do this again knowing it'll have the same result of you thriving in boston with all your friends completely forgetting about me while im here still wearing the stupid fucking necklace you got me on our first date." his voice was shaky, everything he was holding back this whole time had exploded at once.

you feel a salty tear run down your face despite your efforts to stop them, "please, just— this is different. it's different this time i promise." you beg, trying to get words out but hardly being able to, "just, hear me out and it can be your decision on what we-"

matt turns to you again, "i said no y/n." he hesitates when he sees your tears, his expression softening a bit, "you— you were right. it'll never work with you in boston."

"im moving to LA." you blurt out, and that's all you say for a second. a lot of emotions flash on matts face at those words, but you cant make out any of them. you take a deep breath, "i missed you, and boston wasnt taking me anywhere for my future. i..." you think for a moment. "i see you in my future."

matt stares at you, not reacting in any visible way at this point. you start panicking when he still doesn't say anything.

"but, if you dont want that that's okay too— ill stay away, or like— i can go back to boston, i just have a deposit on the house its no big—" your sentence gets cut off by matt walking towards you, grabbing you by the waist, and pulling you in for a kiss.

as your lips connect, he moves one hand to your face. his touch is loving, forgiving. just how you'd remembered it. you didnt kiss him back at first due to the initial shock. he pulls away, "stay." is all he and mumbles before kissing you again.

this time you immediately kiss back, wrapping your arms around his neck just like you used to. his body pressed against yours. its everything is just how it was, but somehow even better. the emotions are strong, enveloping both of you.

his lips move against yours as he moves his hands down to your hips, making your stomach tie in knots and your face warm. suddenly you're acutely aware of every action, every sensation, every thought, every feeling. its all heightened as you realize the situation you're in

the kiss comes to an end, and you stare at him, unable to suppress the smile from your face, "so.. you do still love me?"

matt cant help but laugh, causing you to join him, putting your face against his chest, "y/n, i just went on a whole rant about how i love you. then i kissed you. i think you can put two and two together."

"yeah, well... i miss hearing it." you pull your face from his chest so you can see him again, looking into his light blue eyes, then his whole face. you missed this so much.

"in that case," he kisses your head, "i love you, y/n. so much." his thumb gently caresses the areas of your cheeks that are tear-stained. "and to make it official, can i be your boyfriend again?" he asks, his voice genuine and sensitive. you know he's wanted to say that for so long, and so have you.

you bring him in for a hug this time, "i love you more, matt. and yes, you can." you say, taking in everything as you do.

you finally had matt again after all this time, and this time you weren't letting go. not again.

"matt," you softly say to get his attention, and lift your head up to kiss him again, he immediately kisses back, and picks you up as he does.

you wrap your legs around him, not removing yourself from the kiss. he sits on the bed with you in his lap.

the kiss is passionate, and slowly getting more heated as both of you are overcame with each other. you're pressing down on him, softly grinding against his crotch. it was already hard considering you interrupted him just a few minutes before. the atmosphere of the room changes, its sudden, both of you knowing where this was leading and neither wanting to change it.

he grabs your hips and pulls you down on him harder, your touch to him becoming even more intimate now. he's breath is heavy while you focus on making him feel as good as possible, missing being like this with him. missing seeing him like this.

as things were heating up, he brings the kiss a short stop, "y/n, are you sure you want to go farther with this? i was already kind of.. you know, when you came to talk to me. we just got back together, i dont want you to rush into this if you'll regret it." he checks, not wanting to ruin things because of one stupid choice.

as obvious as it was that you wanted this, it still meant a lot he had asked you. you almost forgot how caring hes always been with you, "i want you, matt. i promise. i want you in every way." as soon as you say this, as if a switch was turned on, he dips his head down and starts kissing at your exposed neck, making a small gasp escape your lips.

hes making sure he leaves marks, biting and sucking in every place, not hurting you, but instead making you more and more needy. you bring your hands up to his hair and run your fingers through it, still as soft as its always been.

"y/n, y'know what i was thinking of earlier?" he asks you as he moves his kisses up to your jaw, blissfully taking in every little noise you would make.

"n-no." you stutter out, trying to focus on his words when all your brain could linger on was the thought of him being inside of you, "tell me?"

you feel his lips curl into a smile, "i was thinking of you. of us. just being like this, your mouth on me again. me inside of you again." he mumbles, just loud enough to where you can hear it, his breath hot against you're skin.

you bite your lip softly, "i remember." your voice is soft, thinking about touching him like that again, "can i.." you trail off your words, getting off his lap to sit on your knees in front of him, and you softly touch his sweatpants waistband.

he lifts his hips up for a moment to help you pull off his pants and boxers easier as he takes off his own shirt.

you stare at his length in front of you, hard with pre cum leaking at the tip. you look up at him staring at you, waiting to see what you do next.

you move one hand to wrap around his base, he shudders at the sudden feeling despite as gentle as you were.

remembering what he likes, you rub your finger against his tip teasingly, just touching it enough to make it somewhat of a tickling, pleasurable sensation.

you look up at him, lust hazy in your eyes before looking back down and licking the tip, swirling your tongue as agonizingly slow as you could .

"fuck, y/n." he hissed, the desperation clear in his voice. he moves one hand to your hair, keeping the other still on the bed as he throws his head back.

after a bit more teasing, you finally put your whole mouth around his tip, and slowly bring your head down.

matts breaths are fast paced and rigid, keeping his hand in your hair as he tightens his grip subconsciously, his mind fuzzy from the slow pace.

you bring your head back up his length, bobbing it up and down. you use your hands to reach any place your mouth cant, swirling your tongue against his base and getting where you knew all his sensitive spots were.

he's letting out soft moans, trying to stay quiet so no one would hear him. he watches you intensely, admiring the sight, "you're so fucking pretty Y/N." he breathes out, slightly bucking his hips into your mouth, loving the feeling of you on him.

you continue like this for a little bit more, enjoying making him feel this way. not too much time passes before he gently pulls you off of him right as he's getting close, "not yet." he mutters, taking deep breaths as he comes down from a high.

you stand up and he pulls you back into his lap, but this time he grabs your waist tightly and flips your positions, pinning you down to the bed.

matt reaches for the hem of your tank top, looking at you, his eyes half lidded, wanting permission to take it off of you.

in response, you lift your back and help him pull it off you. you're about to unhook your bra as well before matt moves your hands out of the way and does it effortlessly.

"its still your favorite?" he asks, motioning towards the bra. its lacy pink one. it was really cute and surprisingly comfortable at the same time.

and you knew it always made you irresistible to matt.

"i only wear it when i see you." you admit breathlessly, before fully taking it off and throwing it off to the side, it now laying on his floor.

he lightly caresses your body, dragging his hands up from your torso to your breasts, feeling every curve you had, "just like i remember." he whispers, before leaning to shower your entire upper body in kisses. "my beautiful girl."

matt continues to kiss down until he gets to your shorts, and he softly pulls both your shorts and panties down, cherishing every bit of you being revealed.

once he takes off those last bits of your clothes, he admires you while he rubs the inside of your thigh, "i missed you, Y/N. not just like this, i missed every moment of you. so much." he says as he takes off his rings, putting them on the bedside table. "i missed being inside you, too."

your face turns red, eyes glued on his hands now, curious on his next actions, "matt-" he interrupts you by spitting on his fingers and bringing them down to rub your clit. "fuck!" you gasp, the sudden feeling shocking you.

matt continues to rub in small circles, your back arching as he does so, "have you been with anyone else?" he asks, kissing your stomach as he speaks, unable to keep himself off you.

"no." you tell him honestly through pants.

matt hums softly, and slowly brings his finger down your hole, before putting it inside you easily from how wet you were, looking at your reaction as he does so, "so tight..." he whispers. "does this hurt? when was the last time you-"

"i dont." you interrupt him, knowing what he's going to ask, "i mean i like, i do stuff.. i just— i only let you do it."

matt smiles against your chest, "ill take care of you baby." he says gently, coming up to kiss your jawline and softly biting as he does so. you feel him curl his finger inside of you, "can i add another one?"

you hesitantly nod, not able to get any words out. the first finger was just starting to feel good as he continued to move it inside of you, he brings his other hand down to rub your clit more as well, making you twitch from the overstimulation.

"use your words," he orders, his voice soft but eyes full of hunger. "i wanna hear you." he brings another finger to your entrance, teasing you by just putting the fingertip in.

you shut your eyes, "please, matt. please put another finger in." you beg, opening your legs more to urge him to do it faster.

"perfect." he says, before putting another finger in, this one more of a struggle, "is that good for you?" he asks, knowing its been a while and not wanting to rush you.

"yes. yeah, thank you. fuck." you reassure, gripping the bedsheet to steady yourself. it wasnt a lot, but it was the most you've had in a while. not to mention its matt.

he chuckles softly against your skin, and brings his head up to kiss you. he moves the hand rubbing your clitoris to grab both of your wrists and pin them above your head. there wasn't too much force, but his grip was just tight enough, "why are you thanking me? it should be the other way around."

he spreads his fingers inside of you, trying to get you ready for whats to come. after the stinging pain was gone, it felt blissful. matts always been good with his fingers, but you forgot how good.

after a while, he had added another finger, prepping and teasing you by dragging it out for as long as he could make you last.

you had begun to grind yourself down on his fingers, trying to get them to go even further inside you, "matt. please, im ready. please. i need you so badly." you plead, your legs twitching from his touch.

"alright, since you've been so patient." he complies, slowly removing his fingers from you, making you shiver from the empty feeling, and letting your wrists go. he brings himself forwards, and you subconsciously wrap your legs around his waist. "let me know when you're ready."

you exhale shakily, feeling matt rub against your entrance. whether he's just trying to get ready, or if hes purposely teasing you, it makes your stomach heat up in that familiar way.

you look at him after a moment, and see the desire as he stares back at you, "im ready." you say, bringing your hands up to wrap around his neck.

at that very same time, he slowly pushes inside you, causing you to let out a sharp gasp, "fuck..." you hiss in pain, closing your eyes.

"it's okay, im going slow. im almost fully in. just let me know when you're ready for me to move, baby." he comforts, running a hand through your hair, the other one gripping your waist.

you eventually feel him come to a stop after what feels like forever, knowing that means he's finally in, "im sorry. im almost ready, shit." you're trying to stop yourself from showing it hurts, knowing its going to feel amazing after a second. remembering how amazing he feels.

he shakes his head immediately, knowing how long it's been for you, "no, dont apologize. take your time." he inhales slowly, "y/n, you feel so fucking good already." he shuts his eyes now too, your walls tightening more around him the longer he stays still inside you.

"okay. okay." you speak up after a few silent moments, "move, please. im ready." you whimper, moving your hands to grab his shoulders, tightening your grip on him to prepare yourself.

matt nods, and slowly pulls himself back and forward again. it stings, but already hurts less than you thought it would.

"faster." you let out in a breathy sigh, looking directly at him now that you're more used comfortable towards the feeling.

"wont fight you on that one, baby." he huffs out, increasing his pace gradually so it's not too much at once for you.

now you have yourself arching your back as he thrusts into you rapidly. he's being gentle, but it's just enough so you can feel his passion. you can feel how badly he wants you.

he's letting out breathy moans, and is leaning into you while continuing at his pace, not taking even the slightest break.

your legs and hips are shaking, bucking up for as much friction as you can get during this, the pleasure building more and more.

you can hear his pants next to your ear, he leans in to kiss you despite not being properly able to. the kiss is sloppy, but heated. there's so much love behind it, and you know you can both feel it, "fuck y/n. you're so perfect, such a good girl. ive wanted this for so long baby, you have no idea." his words are broken apart as he ruts against you.

"im close." you say, his words bringing you to the brink of an orgasm, already still recovering from that high from earlier you know you wont last long, "can i cum, please?"

matt inhales sharply, bringing his hand to your neck and squeezes softly subconsciously. matt slowly nods, "yes. fuck, yes."

with matts permission, you let out a moan saying matts name, slightly hoarse from the grip he has on your neck. you feel yourself grow warmer than before as you release, biting your bottom lip, trying to keep a little bit of dignity for yourself.

"fuck." matt sighs out. "me, too. im- fuck, i have to-" he quickly pulls out and releases all over your stomach and breasts, his mouth open as whimpers fall out of it.

"fuck. sorry." he apologizes, leaning over to grab a towel.

he quickly wipes his cum off you, and throws the towel in a bin of other dirty clothes, "do you need to take a shower or anything?" he asks, clearly still out of breath.

thats an obvious no since you can hardly talk, let alone stand up for that long, "no its okay." you respond as you scoot up, patting a spot on the bed, "just stay here with me. or, i— i can leave if you want me too—" you panic, not knowing if he wanted you to leave or not. you didn't want to have the wrong idea and invade in matts privacy.

"no, y/n." he laughs softly, "stay, please. just give me one second, okay? ill be right back." matt grabs some underwear and sweatpants and throws them on before kissing your forehead and leaving the room.

a few minutes pass by, and he comes back holding a plate of some of your favorite snacks and two bottles of water. "i know its late, so you probably don't want anything to eat right now, but at least drink some water for me if you can." he hands you the water and puts the snacks down on top of the drawers next to you, "do you want some clothes to sleep in? a sweater? you're cold, arent you?"

you just stare at him admiringly for a beat, wondering how you got so lucky as to have this wonderful man back in your life, "dont stress, matt. you dont need to do all of this. can you just hand me my underwear and maybe a jacket or something?" you request, a smile on your face. you missed this feeling so much.

"yeah, totally. here," matt grabs your underwear and a random ransom hoodie he has and hands them to you. you quickly put them on, and matt crawls in bed with you, "come here." he whispers softly, wrapping his arm around you and running his fingers up and down your arm, "i missed you."

a gentle smile forms on your lips as you lean into his touch. "i missed you, too."

matts silent again, lost in thought, "why dont you just stay here? i mean, it might be too soon but— it'd save money for you and plus you'd be here most of the time anyways. plus, i could see you more."

your face is immediately covered in a blush at the implication. its a risky idea, but hes right. it'd make more sense, after all you were going to be here more than your own house anyways, "you know what? i dont think thats a bad idea. if it means i get to live like this everyday, im definitely down." you snicker while leaning more into matts chest, "but the issue is i signed to live there for at least 6 months already."

"that's okay," matt assures you. "as long as you're nearby, you know?"

you nod, leaning in to kiss him softly. his hand gives your waist a gentle squeeze before chuckling softly.

"round two?"

A/N

hope u enjoy!! part 2 is in the making

[beifong-brainrot]

In what universe is Korra masc or butch? God forbid a woman be feminine, but not hyper-feminine (love you, Asami). Or just prefer pants to skirts because she's physically active in her duties.

(Off topic, but I used to wonder what her season 1 pants were made from because they looked so comfy.)

If I had to categorize her, like under threat, I would say maybe a hard femme. And even that doesn't feel quite right for her. Like you're not gonna catch her in a full face of makeup any time soon, but she clearly likes more feminine aesthetics.Let women of color have their masculine and feminine elements in peace, I beg.

(Also, Korra's masculinization by the fandom leads directly back to how the "masc x femme" dynamic is idealized and romanticized, to the point where it seems unfathomable at times that two femmes can be together and content that way. And how women of colour will always be masculinized unless they perform hyperfemininity. But y'all aren't ready for that chat just yet.)

Just insert that "butchest woman the internet can handle" meme I guess.

I think its just so interesting that Korra is presented as "boyish" for dressing practically (Also, mind you, her clothing doesn't seem terribly masculine either) and for liking "boyish" things when it's later shown that Asami also... likes these things. Asami and Korra bond over racing cars, Asami also fights and she seems genuinely invested in probending.

Btw, I know a lot of people like the idea of Asami secretly being a villain, but it actually feels like a breath of fresh air? Too many times have we solved a love triangle by making a rival Evil. And hyperfemininity is so often villanised in a very specific way, especially in contrast tk a "less girly" protagonist.

Ofc, Asami and Korra break so many tropes through their romance, but honestly even before them becoming romantic, their interactions were pretty unique for the character archetypes they were in the type of media they were in.

[Also I also loved Korra's pants they genuinely looked so comfy. Though I just think I have a weakness for lantern style pants even though I dont think i could pull them off lol]

Also yeah, Korra being very distinctly brown is part of why she's masculinised so much. And I also want to note that, from what I've seen, hyperfeminity in woc is still mocked and talked down to and dismissed as trashy. Too many times have I seen a fashion trend be applauded on the white girlies when its critiqued on the women of colour whom the trend originated from.

What we percieve as feminine is very much still dictated by eurocentric beauty and culture standards, while, of course, other ethnicities and cultures will have their own versions and definitions of what is "feminine". This is why you see that the bulk of female athletes who are transvestigated and accused of "secretly being men" are women of colour. Features we've grown to percieve as feminine as a society are features we asscociate with white women, and a lack of said features supposedly denotes masculinity, instead of a different creed of femininity.

But I also don't want to talk over subjects that are not mine to speak on so. I just... don't really like how we talk abt feminine gender presentation. I love presenting femme, when I'm doing it for myself it's very relaxing and enjoyable. But damn does it hurt my head when I think abt it too deep lol

And yeah, fandom in general has a bit of an obsession with the masc/femme dynamic, a hit of the modern version of when you ask same sex couples the "so who's the guy" question lol. But I think Korrasami got hit with that stick particularly hard, tragically. A friend once made an excellent observation that this is also probably the reason we have so many omegaverse fics in the fandom too.

[transgenderer]

thinking again about the period last year when my E was too high and i was crazy, in the like, colloquial social sense, acting unpleasant and intensely emotional and such. the worst part of being crazy is that like...its unpleasant AND people dislike you for it. its suffering that you are then punished for, and you cant even blame them for punishing you like youre behaving worse towards them, they dont want to hang out with you.

makes me think about the paper linked in this thread (h/t acx). aiui the idea is that we should expect personality differences to be the result of insufficient selection (like, mutation and such fast enough that evolution cant weed it out) rather than balancing selection, because we dont see genetic variants (like, specific mutations, i think) with large effect sizes, we only see lots of small ones. which would make sense if there were tons of ways for mutations to make your personality slightly "worse" (evolutionarily), too many for evolution to weed them all out, but wouldnt make sense if evolution was actively selecting for personality variants (because it's easier to "see" those big effects, so we'd expect evolution to pick them up before picking up all the little ones). "craziness genes", again in this colloquial sense, fit nicely into this framework, they seem purely evolutionarily harmful (because theyre harmful to social status and acceptance and such)

i think my main skepticism re the paper is just that like, humans modern enough to have very complex social arrangements (i mean on the level of like, hunter gatherers. still pretty complex!) are very young, less than a million years old i believe (although i mean, its not like we know for sure), and humans breed slow, so that's not a lot of evolutionary time! given that surely personality trait selection is pretty weak (compared to like, lactose tolerance, for example), i think it would make sense to guess that humans have actually been subject to very weak selection on personality in general. maybe in that case you would see variants with strong effects? but it seems plausible that its just hard for a single mutation to have a strong effect on personality without also having some other more important strong effect.