#not 2ure what yet.

[dualiitree2]

2omethiing dii2tiinctly mentally iill ii2 happeniing twoniight.

[carcinoarmageddon]

omg is...is it back??? i read through the WHOLE blog but i gotta know. is it back 🥹🥹🥹??????

[cG]: YOU KNOW WHAT? I CAN SAY WITH FULL CERTAINTY THAT I AM IN FACT BACK FOR THE LONG HAUL. THE SUN SETS AND THE HOOTBEASTS SCREECH THEIR CLARION CALL FOR THE GOD OF YOUR WORLD HAS RETURNED. MY MAGNANIMITY AND GRATUITY KNOW NO BOUNDS, TINY GREY-FACED HUMAN.

[cG]: YOU DON’T NEED TO THANK ME, BY THE WAY. I WILL ADMIT THE EXTENDED ABSENCE CAME BECAUSE MY INFERNAL ADRENAL LOBE WAS GORILLA GLUED TO THE SWITCHBOARD AND STUCK HITTING THE BIG RED PANIC BUTTON OVER AND OVER. THERE IS NO EXCUSE FOR BEING A MASSIVE, STEAMING PILE OF HOOFBEASTSHIT, BUT HERE I AM, YET AGAIN, EXCEEDING EXPECTATIONS.

[cG]: CALL IT A WEEKLY POSTING SCHEDULE WITH A HUGE WIGGLY HAND.

[tA]: that 2eem2 unliikely but 2ure why not.

[pesterloglog]

Aradia Megido, Sollux Captor, Jade Harley, Kanaya Maryam, Tavros Nitram

Act 5, page 3590-3613

apocalypseArisen [AA] began trolling twinArmageddons [TA]

AA: s0llux!

TA: hey what'2 up aa.

AA: y0u will never guess what i just f0und

TA: won't ii?

AA: i d0ubt it

TA: wa2 iit the matchiing ruiin2 2iite?

AA: um

AA: yes

AA: h0w did y0u kn0w!

TA: ii don't know, ju2t a weiird feeliing.

TA: ii feel liike we had thii2 conver2atiion before and that'2 what iit wa2 about.

AA: yeah

AA: me t00

AA: what d0 y0u think it means?

TA: probably nothiing. but now not only doe2 iit feel liike we had the conver2atiion before, but iit'2 goiing diifferently thii2 tiime.

TA: 2o iit'2 extra weiird. maybe your voiice2 are iinvolved?

AA: i d0nt kn0w maybe

AA: maybe y0urs are t00?

TA: ii don't hear a goddamn thiing.

TA: do you?

AA: wait

AA: yes

AA: shes very quiet th0ugh i cant tell what shes saying!

TA: oh well.

TA: why don't we pretend there ii2 no 2pooky paranormal phenomena goiing on ju2t once and talk about what you wanted two talk about.

AA: g00d idea

AA: 0k d0 y0u remember what we talked ab0ut regarding kanayas ruins?

TA: 2orta.

AA: i asked y0u f0r help in understanding the glyphs

TA: ii gue22.

AA: 0_0

AA: are y0u just being difficult 0r d0 y0u really n0t remember

TA: ii gue22 ii don't fiind the whole my2tery of the ruiin2 a2 exciitiing a2 you, ok?

AA: well 0bvi0usly!

AA: but i really appreciate y0ur help anyway

TA: 2ure.

TA: how can ii help, then.

AA: well y0u said that y0ud need an0ther set 0f glyphs t0 make sense 0f them

AA: y0u speculated that there might be an0ther set 0f ruins

AA: y0u even guessed they w0uld be blue! it turns 0ut y0u were right

AA: d0nt y0u think that is pretty c00l?

TA: oh yeah, ii am awe2ome about that for 2ure.

TA: but,

TA: ii can't 2hake the feeliing the2e ruiin2 are goiing two be nothiing but trouble for u2.

AA: but y0u say that ab0ut everything!

TA: that'2 becau2e iit'2 fuckiing true about everythiing!

AA: n0 its n0t!

AA: i did find s0me 0ther neat things d0wn here t00 which are strange but quite harmless and n0t f0reb0ding in the least!

TA: liike what?

AA: like this AMAZING hat!

AA: it is an authentic arche0l0gists hat its s0 hard t0 find them in this style

AA: there are n0 h0rn h0les but i l0ve it anyway its great

TA: pretty 2weet aa.

TA: hey diidn't you al2o fiind 2ome biit2 and piiece2 of your biizarre robot doppelganger.

AA: i wasnt g0ing t0 tell y0u ab0ut that!

AA: damn it h0w did y0u kn0w

TA: ii don't know, ii ju2t "remembered" 2ome more 2hiit about thii2 dii2covery, god 2orry.

AA: this is stupid

TA: yeah, well, ii gue22 thii2 ii2 the kiind of 2hiit you have to deal wiith when two p2ychiic2 talk to each other about 2tuff.

AA: maybe

TA: why don't we piick thii2 up agaiin later when we're not feeliing 2o weiird?

AA: well

AA: 0k

apocalypseArisen [AA] began trolling twinArmageddons [TA] and apocalypseArisen [AA]

AA: ahem

AA: sorry to interrupt i wanted to give you both the chance to remember but it doesnt look like this is going anywhere!

TA: what the fuck?

AA: w0w what

AA: is it coming back yet

TA: is WHAT c0ming back, wh0 ARE y0u?

TA: wh0a h0ld 0n.

TA: why am i talking like y0u suddenly?

AA: this is a mem0ry

AA: in a dream bubble

AA: thats right!

TA: 0h.

TA: that d0esn't really answer my questi0n, but 0k.

AA: y0u changed y0ur v0ice because y0u remembered

AA: like i did

TA: remembered what?

AA: that i died

AA: this is my mem0ry and als0 hers

AA: but i went 0n t0 bec0me the r0b0t wh0se remains are in this crater

AA: whereas she did n0t

AA: i d0nt actually kn0w her st0ry 0r h0w she g0t here but f0r me this was the end 0f the r0ad

AA: this is the afterlife

TA: well, shit.

TA: s0 then i guess i'm dead t00?

AA: nope!

AA: you are just asleep

AA: you are also blind!

TA: h0ly shit, i can't see!

AA: yes thats what being blind means

TA: w0w, awes0me! way t0 be awes0mely sympathetic t00 my terrible new pr0blem, aa.

AA: sollux will you shut up and stop being so tragic for once

AA: you knew this was going to happen! your prophecies of personal doom were practically all you ever talked about

AA: i think you were looking forward to this honestly

AA: shes right

TA: i can't believe this, it's alm0st as if i'm getting...

TA: D0UBLE TEAMED.

TA: 😎

TA: damn.

TA: that didn't feel right at all, i think i might have t0 retire the wh0le bifurcati0n gimmick, puns and all.

TA: actually that is kind 0f a relief, maybe y0u're right, i'm feeling better ab0ut this already.

AA: great!

AA: you should be able to relax now that youve been released from the curse of your vision twofold just like you said youd be

AA: you are now merely doomed!

TA: 0h.

TA: that's... awes0me?

AA: being d00med isnt that bad

AA: i spent m0st 0f my life that way remember

AA: at least y0u have the luxury 0f understanding

AA: and the best part ab0ut being d00med is y0u 0nly have t0 put up with it until y0u die

AA: thats the spirit hahaha

AA: actually i guess i dont have to keep talking like im doomed anymore do i

AA: nope :)

TA: this is s0 weird, what am i even listening t0 here.

TA: 0_0

TA: FUCK, i cann0t BELIEVE i just made that face.

AA: hahahahaha!

AA: hahahahaha!

TA: g0d dammit.

TA: 0h yeah, als0...

TA: why the fuck are my teeth missing?

AA: i

AA: dont know?

TA: 0k, well, great, glad we g0t t0 the fucking b0tt0m 0f that mystery.

TA: myssssssstery. mystery. mySSSSthSSSStery. mysterymysterymystery.

TA: man, i can't even lisp anym0re if i try.

TA: please d0n't laugh, i can tell y0u are b0th enj0ying this, i can smell it using my new blind guy n0se p0wers.

AA: really?

TA: n0 n0t literally, i was j0king. i mean n0t YET. maybe i'll ask tz ab0ut it when i wake up th0ugh.

TA: hey what was that n0ise?

AA: what noise?

TA: i think s0me0ne else is here.

AA: oh its jade!

TA: jade?? wtf.

AA: whos jade

AA: shes one of the humans we met after you died

AA: ok

AA: i guess i am out of the loop on chronology for once

AA: thats fine youll catch up!

GG: ummmmmm hey guys i hope im not interrupting!!!

TA: well, yeah, y0u kind 0f were, s0rt 0f a reuni0n 0f cl0se departed friends g0ing 0n here, but n0 big deal i guess.

GG: oh no!

GG: i can leave

AA: no dont!

AA: sollux try to be polite

AA: there is no reason at all for you to feel hostile toward them anymore

AA: jade is very nice and she did nothing wrong

AA: none of them did so when you wake up maybe you should try to reconcile with them or at the very least just say hello

TA: did Y0U?

AA: did i what

TA: be nice t0 them 0r whatever bef0re y0u expl0ded.

AA: well no

AA: but i should have!

AA: i did with you before i left didnt i

TA: i guess s0.

GG: :o

AA: this is awkward

AA: shush you!

AA: what actually happened after i died it sounds complicated

AA: it is!

AA: ill get you up to speed i promise but guys come on lets not scare away our guest

AA: ok then ill shut up

AA: i think one aradia saying things is more than enough probably

TA: y0u can say that again heheheheheh.

TA: but i mean, d0n't say it again literally, because that's kind 0f the wh0le p0int, and w0uld c0mpletely c0ntradi...

AA: oh my god shut up!

GG: its ok! i can take another nap later when you guys arent busy...

AA: no jade its ok

AA: please stay! im curious about why you are here

GG: well...

GG: i have just been enjoying these little naps more and more lately!

GG: each time i go to sleep i meet more new people and learn so much

GG: but i still cant get karkat to take a nap, boy talk about a guy who is anti nap!

TA: ahahahah, yeah, what a d0uche!

GG: seeeeeriously!

GG: he is the douchiest of crabby crabs who ever douched a big douchey crab

TA: l0l.

GG: but yeah, its been fun, i should really thank feferi again for setting it up so we could meet like this!

TA: wait, ff is here?

GG: yup!

TA: 0h g0d, why didn't that 0ccur t0 me, where is she??

GG: ummm probably in another bubble

GG: but youll find her! maybe during your next nap...

TA: well shit, why can't i just g0 glub ar0und 0ut there in the ring and find her n0w?

TA: i mean, aside fr0m the fact that i'm blind and c0mpletely useless.

AA: navigating between bubbles is difficult here

AA: its better to drift between them naturally as they intersect

AA: not spatially but through common points in memory

AA: to navigate the furthest ring you need to have mastered the flow of time!

AA: that is why i am here

AA: i am alive again so i may assist the dead in this way

TA: huh.

AA: jade tell me

AA: have you seen me here before? i mean me dressed like i am now wearing my godhood

GG: yeah!

GG: you were really nice and helpful

TA: wait, what, y0u're wearing a g0dh00d?

TA: why didn't y0u tell me that, what gives? 0r that y0u came back t0 life??

AA: im wearing a hood and have butterfly wings what else would you like to know

TA: man, being blind is dumb, can i like gr0pe y0u 0r s0mething t0 get up t0 date 0n y0ur appearance, w0uld that be weird?

AA: yes sollux that would probably be pretty weird

GG: i think your outfit looks so cute! i love your wings too

AA: thank you your outfit is quite spiffy too

AA: i like that skirt a lot especially

AA: is

AA: is that a skirt?

GG: i am not sure :o

TA: /R0LLING MY EYES.

TA: is what i w0uld be d0ing if that were p0ssible.

AA: shhh!

TA: aa c0me 0n y0u were making a p0int.

AA: yes ok

AA: you see those encounters you had with me before have not happened for me yet because ive only just arrived

AA: time follows strange paths here as does space

AA: if you travel a great enough distance you may discover you are also traveling either backwards or forwards in time as well!

AA: just as if you stay in one place for too long the geometry of space surrounding you will become unreliable

AA: you may swat the air to your left and discover you have just slapped yourself!

AA: the only way to make sense of it is to understand either property very well

AA: and since i am new here i have some learning to do just like everyone else

AA: but i do know one thing

GG: what!

AA: i knew that the first bubble i would enter would be an important one for us to visit

TA: what's s0 imp0rtant ab0ut it?

AA: hang on

AA: we are moving on to a new memory hold that thought

AA: it is important because it will help us begin to understand why we are all here

TA: what d0 y0u mean why we are all here?

TA: y0u mean in the afterlife? that's easy.

TA: because she's asleep, she's dead, y0u're alive, and i'm blind, c0uldn't be simpler.

AA: no no

AA: not why we are in this bubble now

AA: but why we all exist in the first place and why we all went on this adventure together

TA: 0h, that.

AA: there is much to understand and i believe it all begins with one sequence of events

AA: watching will help those whove passed to understand the purpose of their sacrifice and those still living to understand what must be done to complete the journey still ahead

AA: we will let the memories lead the way

AA: are you guys ready?

GG: i am ready!

AA: ok lets allow the next memory to take shape

AA: i believe it is kanayas

AA: i will reprise my role in a conversation i had with her shortly after i discovered the ruins

AA: everybody hide and try not to spoil it for her until she remembers!

AA: hey kanaya

AA: there is s0mething i want t0 give y0u

GA: Oh Really

AA: yes its s0mething very 0dd i f0und when i disc0vered the ruins the 0ther night

AA: i d0nt kn0w what its arche0l0gical significance is yet but i suspect y0u will be able t0 repair it!

GA: This Is A Dream Isnt It

AA: 0_0

AA: w0w!

AA: uh i mean

AA: o_o

AA: wow

AA: you figured that out very fast!

GA: It Seemed Obvious

GA: Either Im Sleeping Or Im Dead Which Is It

AA: oh i am sure you are alive

AA: you are unconscious now and will likely wake up as your new self very soon

GA: My New Self

AA: yes

AA: you are undergoing a metamorphosis which you have been groomed for since you were very young

AA: much like i was for my various personal iterations including this one

GA: You Mean

GA: Being A Ghost And Then A Frog And Then A Robot And Then A Fairy

AA: yes!

AA: but it sure sounds silly when you list them all like that

GA: Kind Of

GA: What Do You Mean We Have Been Groomed

AA: wellllll

AA: that is what we are about to find out!

AA: if you will oblige us by continuing with this memory

GA: Okay

GA: What Do I Do

AA: why dont we go through this conversation again to the best of our recollection

AA: but i guess rather than acting it out we can just talk about it

AA: the old fashioned way

GA: Was What We Were Attempting Before Not Old Fashioned

AA: i have no idea

GA: It Seems To Me The Nature Of The Afterlife Is Probably Very Old Fashioned

GA: Maybe Even The Most Old Fashioned A Thing Can Get

AA: haha yeah you know what i mean though

GA: Yes Then

GA: This Was When You Were About To Give Me That Unusual Gift From The Ruins

AA: yes

AA: i then had sollux deliver the pieces to you so you could stitch it back up

AA: sollux that is your cue!

AA: come out and play the part

TA: s0 we d0n't have t0 hide anym0re?

AA: no of course not!

AA: obviously the jig is up everyone can come out now

GG: yay!

TA: s0 like,

TA: 0k s0 i'm supp0sed t0 act 0ut what i did bef0re, when i br0ught her these shitty d0ll parts, is that's what's g0ing 0n here?

GA: Yeah Im Still Not Sure Aradia Are We Supposed To Be Role Playing

AA: no guys come on this isnt that complicated!

AA: we are just revisiting the past just like we would if we were talking about it

AA: but it just so happens we can watch it happen as we talk about it

AA: and as a matter of fact

AA: this story does involve a role playing game but not in that way!

TA: thith ith kinb 0f thtupib.

AA: youre stupid and you sound stupid!

TA: h0py thith, i b0 th0unb thtupib.

TA: why the fuckth ith by b0uth fthull 0f all thethe theeth subbenly?

AA: i dont know o_o

AA: but you maaay be waking up soon

TA: 0h, 0k, greath, th0 i will mithth the retht 0f the c00l tht0ry, 0k.

AA: maybe not if we hurry this along!

GG: wait! before we do...

GG: hi kanaya! it is nice to meet you

GA: Hi Jade

GA: Uh

GA: What Is That Thing Youre Wearing

GG: you dont like it???

GA: No I Didnt Mean To Sound Disapproving

GA: But I Do Think More Colorful Apparel Suits You Better

GG: yes i know you told me!

GA: I Did

GG: yes but you probably havent yet

GG: not from your perspective..... i could not help but overhear you are asleep now

GG: you told me all about what happened after you woke up!

GA: About What

GG: about how you turned into a vampire

GA: Whats A Vampire

TA: thith ith ribicul0uth.

AA: thollux is right

AA: i mean sollux

AA: kanaya tell us what happened next!

GA: There Isnt Much To Say

GA: I Repaired The Doll And Made Him A Nice Outfit

GA: With A Far More Becoming Palette And Fit Than The Absurd Tatters He Was Found In

GA: I Thought At Least

AA: yes

GA: Uh

GA: Should There Be Anything Else To This Story

AA: not really!

GG: isnt that daves puppet?

AA: yes

GG: :\

TA: aw sthith, i guethth i'm 0utha here.

AA: bye sollux

TA: thee y0u lather eberyb0by.

GG: bye!

GA: Anyway That Is All I Can Remember

GA: I Quickly Began To Find The Doll Unnerving So I Put Him Away

GA: To My Knowledge He Has Remained Secure In My Block Ever Since

GA: Is He Relevant In Some Way

GG: guys why do you have daves puppet?

GG: what is going on here!

GA: Yes Aradia It Seems You Have Some Foreknowledge Of This Narrative Maybe You Can Tell Us Why Any Of This Is Important

AA: this is only a piece of the story

AA: the other pieces will fall into place with successive memories and it will all become clear

AA: but yes alright i will eliminate some suspense and try to serve as a better guide on this tour through the catacombs of our collective subconscious

AA: the separate tunnels we once traveled in the dark as individuals we now retrace together with a torch

AA: on the walls we illuminate the runes which describe a convoluted origin story

AA: an origin we participated in

AA: we were spurred to these actions by that which was being originated

AA: and incited to acts of revenge as we were turned against each other

AT: i DON'T REMEMBER THIS,

AT: i MEAN,

AT: i REMEMBER GETTING JUMPED OFF THE CLIFF BY MY LEGS,

AT: bUT NOT THE THING i'M DOING NOW,

AA: no

AA: our manipulator disguised his tracks well

AT: dO i,

AT: hAVE TO LIE ON THE FLOOR LIKE THIS,

AT: iS THAT IMPORTANT,

AA: no tavros you can get up

AT: aLSO,

AT: cAN WE, oR AT LEAST i, bE NOT IN THIS MEMORY,

AT: bECAUSE,

AT: iT'S ONE THAT'S NOT AS GREAT AS MOST,

AA: we will leave it soon

AA: but you were doing something very important here

AT: wHAT WAS i DOING,

AA: writing a part of the code

AA: an incomplete fragment consisting of four symbols

AA: comprising the first word of a binary refrain

AA: a pair of sounds emerging from the belly of a fabled tyrants menace

AA: but you authored only one sound of the pair

AA: i would write the other

AA: in the soot of my ruined hive i scrawled my part of the code

AA: completing the phrase of legend

AA: the persisting sounds said to accompany the ultimate demise of the tyrant less an arm and an eye

AA: but even these eight characters

AA: the scrawlings of charge

AA: were still but half the code

AA: there was another half by scourge in two parts

AA: one part three symbols

AA: and the other

AA: five

AA: why the scale was tipped in this way between sisters

AA: i cannot say!

AA: each fragment would be transcribed in our rulebooks

AA: sealing the collaboration between rust bloods and blue bloods

AA: completing the code for our sessions architect

AA: not exactly

AA: there was another fragment

AA: oh?

AA: yes

AA: an additional eight symbols

AA: from a wild card source i suppose

AA: it came from a timeline not meant to happen

AA: the one i came from to ensure it wouldnt

AA: thus sealing my fate

AA: i believed the fragment was gibberish from a lunatic

AA: after completing his rampage through our session

AA: since it was not part of the scripted chronology i was oblivious until it was too late to stop it

AA: not that it would matter if i did the timeline had already gone astray

AA: i pieced together what had happened by sleuthing the various scenes

AA: and discovered the text which the code was recorded in

AA: i decided to return to the alpha timeline with the text

AA: as evidence for his madness i guess

AA: in the alpha timeline this text was destroyed

AA: in an explosion caused by a computer virus

AA: this explosion did not take place on my timeline

AA: i identified this event as the difference prompting the offshoot

AA: and returned to our planet via the reckoning just as i did at the end of my life

AA: though that time deliberately

AA: to influence events quietly to make sure it happened

AA: and later joined the rest of our doomed selves to help defeat the king

AA: the others surely had similar responsibilities along the way

AA: as for the book

AA: i lost track of it shortly after i arrived

AA: yes we all lost track of our books

AA: they were gathered surreptitiously by agents assigned to the task

AA: and in the veil their codes were merged with the ghost imprints of other mysterious artifacts

AA: our first guardian was brought to life on the seed to pass through skaias final gate of defense

AA: the first to find alternia

[k3agn]

We never really saw what Mages did in Homestuck.

Many theorists (almost all of them actually) pair Mages with Seers because of either the “prophetic insight” thing or the “being able to hear their exile more clearly than others” thing. Naturally, neither are full proof, and everyone knows seems to know this but this unconfirmed pairing is never questioned. Why?

I apologize in advance for the long post.

I know with a fair amount of certainty most if not all of my highly contradictory theories have been wrong over the years, but the problem with misinformation and misunderstanding is that it stands in the way of progress. So naturally, I’m going to shatter the one thing the classpect theorist community treat as absolute and hope for the best.

I wanna start with Mituna, the Heir of Doom. Bet no one saw that coming. In Openbound, Aranea had this to say about him:

“The Heir of Doom was once a powerful psionic. He was gifted with vision twofold and had strong prophetic insights wherever a 8leak future was concerned. He had much to say when it came to warning us a8out the path of doom and destruction we were all headed for, 8ut no one took him very seriously.”

Mituna wasn’t a mage or a seer, yet he had a lot of prophetic insights due to his aspect: Doom. Now let’s compare this to what Sollux had to say:

TA: but before ii diie, iim goiing two go bliind liike you.

TA: iit ha2 two happen liike that.

TA: iim not 2ure why, but ii thiink iit2 liike...

TA: fulfiilliing 2ome requiirement for a true prophet of doom.

TA: iin order for the vii2iion2 two be riight, that ha2 two happen, and the uniiver2e wiill make 2ure iit wiill.

Again, the association with Doom. Also while people have linked Seers thematically to prophets, in the comic itself, prophets/prophetic insights never tie into Seers directly, save for Terezi’s mention of Alternia’s BL1ND PROPH3TS. Seers are related to visions (Rose, Kankri), but it is equally linked to Skaia’s clouds. Terezi is also the only one of the Seers to have lost a sense; both mages have, as has Latula (her sense of smell).

But what has been said of Meulin, or other mage?

“The Mage of Heart as you know is an ardent disciple of the romantic sciences. She has a well earned reputation as a miracle worker when it comes to match making.”

To me at least, this seems to put a focus on learning for mages, but it could just be a Meulin thing. Karkat similarly considered himself an expert on romance, so it’s hard to say. But I don’t see any real connections to Seers here; there’s no mention of Meulin having visions or anything really.

This leads me to believe that the visions could be more tied to aspects (light, doom), or other factors entirely (Skaia’s clouds, vision twofold, Vantas’ blood mutation, etc.). Primarily though, I would argue that it falls most in line with 3 things: Seers, Skaia’s Clouds, and the Doom aspect. It’s not a Mage thing though, and it’s not a Mage/Seer thing because there are factors and characters with classes that aren’t Mage or Seer that share them. The tie in with the Captors is their vision twofold, but visions are more strongly linked with almost every instance of Rose, the Sufferer, Prospit Dreamers with the clouds of Skaia.

In terms of being able to hear exiles more clearly, that’s only been confirmed with Seers. John took note of his exile’s voice pretty early on too, but couldn’t explain it. Sollux didn’t really know what it was either, but he recognized another unwelcomed voice in his head and flipped. That doesn’t make it a solid factor in my book, if anything it’s weaker than the “losing a sense” thing.

To conclude my ramblings, let me say that I’m not outright saying that Mages and Seers aren’t paired, just that the popular, “obvious” reasonings everyone seems to use are not concrete. It could just as easily be Witches/Seers, Witches/Mages, Mages/Sylphs, etc. The only concrete ways to identify class pairings are a) we’re explicitly told they are (thief/rogue, prince/bard, probably lord/muse, but mostly the master classes are just presumed to be paired). Challenging popular ideas is the only way to move forward

Much love, homestucks <>

[ask-goldencapricorn]

Wow you've met a lot of new trolls! What do you think of them all?

Ok, thii2 ii2 goiing two be a biit compliicated and ii2 goiing two be a long one.

Let'2 get 2tarted:

2ollux:

2ollux ii2 2pooky iin a good way. Beiing a gho2t II gue22 that ii2 two be expected.

Terezii:

Terezi ii2 defenatly iintere2tiing and ha2 good ta2t iin gla22e2. *ii2 cool*

Feferii:

II don't know Feferii all that well. My gue22 ii2 that Feferii ii2 cool.

Aradiia:

Aradiia ii2 niice however II do have a few que2tiion2.

Karkat:

Karkat ii2 Karkat. 2o anger. very trouble. Wow.

Nepeta:

Nepeta ii2 cool and has an iintere2tiing 2hiipiing chart and yet refu2e2 two 2how iit. Nepeta Ampora *ii2 catfii2h*

Eriidan:

Eriidan ha2 anger ii2ue2 and need2 two loo2en up. Eriidan wiill defenatly be a better emperor than the one we have now.

Kanaya:

Kanaya ii2 a biit of a mystery and II have a few que2tiion2. II am not 2ure what II thiink or how II feel about them.

[contaiinedarmageddon2]

Stuck!

4. In A Shop

((Kind of uh. Typed a bunch. Needed to in order to properly get the idea out without it being all rushed sounding. Ya first read-more link courtesy of getting my hands on the buffest fish around))

Sollux’s obstinate nature was known to nearly put Karkat to shame, leaving most friends hoping for a regularly scheduled mood swing to change the yellowblood’s mind for them. There was however a workaround that kept Karkat’s blanket petulance a step above the psionic. Sollux was utterly incapable of denying a request from a Peixes, particularly Feferi. Something about the bubbly fishgirl with a big personality crippled his stubbornness.

So it was that the 4ft nothing nerd trotted next to the thudding footfalls produced by the towering legs of the toughest tyrian around. ‘Rippling’ probably didn’t do justice to the sheer amount of muscle packed onto each inch of this Peixes, but it was a pun he’d have to tell her later. The concept of a ‘mall’ was rare among the solitary troll race, that many of the species packed in one place without the structure of an army would almost always lead to a small scale war. But humans had no such problems outside of certain Fridays in November. The idea of being able to browse so many different wares in person, AND show off her room dominating physique to a crowd just by walking about, AND drag along a favorite nerd to tease drew in Fef.

At first Sollux found kinship with other humans, mostly the men it seemed, collectively stranded at a small collection of undersized chairs at this ‘clothing store’ (he could have sworn humans had wardrobifiers of a sort too), but eventually found himself and everyone else staring up, up, and up at the pouting face of the heiress up above.

“Sollux! You can’t just sit t)(ere! You s)(oald buy somet)(ing too! Or at least try somet)(ing on!“

“iit all look2 the fuckiin2 same two me FF, ii’d ju2t be bliind piickiing 2omethiing.”

“Fin! T)(en I’LL pick somet)(ing out for you! -Easy!“

Sollux found himself half picked up and half flung further into the store by a hand that could probably get all the way around his torso if it tried. “Betides, if you try on a t)(ing or two t)(en you can kelp me decide w)(at to get.““FF ii’m 2ure iif anythiing iin thii2 place fiit2 you iit wiill look fiine.”

“I meant you can watc)( me try on t)(e outfits guppy.“

It took Sollux a second to put together the utter lack of a chance anything in here would fit the towering girl properly and the offer to model them. After that he accepted the bundle of colors suggested by Fef’s questionable style with a straight face and hurried off to the changing booths. The tight cubicle with a bench to one side and a mirror on the wall gave him a bit more space than most. Inspecting the damage he was about to inflict onto fashion, and probably Kanaya’s soul somewhere he saw she had mixed traditional alternian black pants with the result of a rainbow taking one too many shots of hard liquor over a white canvas, what humans seemed to refer to as ‘Tye-dye’. After changing into the affront to nature he stood looking in the mirror, deciding within moments this just wasn’t going to do. He’d sit back down, change, and ‘politely’ suggest he would take her advice on an outfit without letting her pick it outright.

Out in the store, Feferi giggled to herself. The little guppy would look adorable in that outfit, especially with the look of boiling indignation he’d probably wear with it. Maybe she could get some string somewhere here and wear him like a cute necklace. Any guilt at knowing Sol didn’t care at all about fashion could be assuaged when she gave him a little show. Even the biggest clothing sizes here clung to her tighter than her normal muscle hugging outfit, and the shrimp’s admiration of her form was readily apparent. As it should be! More people should be unafraid or helpless to show their awe of her. With another laugh, she looked around to make sure he hadn’t come out yet and backed into one of the tiny stalls. They barely contained her, in fact straining against her shoulders, but she was flexible enough to sit down, conserving space and still change.

Sollux did not have time to even yelp as Fef came into the stall ass-first, having not noticed that the lock was in at all when her turning of the handle ripped right through it. Those steel bending mountains took his breath away first with majesty, then with impact force as they came down upon him onto the seat. Feferi didn’t even register his presence as resistance to her movements, fully expecting the seat to be uncomfortable if it didn’t crumple entirely. By some miracle it did not, but left the shorter troll squashed under (and by a quick miracle between) legs over half again as wide as he was. If he’d taken the full impact of her caboose he’d likely suffer the same fate as an actual caboose being hit by Fef would, annihilation.

While being crushed under glute or leg was high up on the list of fates Sollux rooted for in his Doomed life, he figured he should avoid it as Fef tried to move and change without wrecking the changing room. It would ruin the shopping trip after all, and stain the un-bought clothes. His body, seeming to agree, offered a solution. Contracting sensations unrelated to the tons of giddy seadweller atop him pulled at something deep within, and the modest mountains pinning him in became akin to twin Olympus Mons of dense gluteal muscle as Sollux dwindled to his minimum 2 inch height. At least it let him get up, appreciating the view briefly, and simply walk out from under her, heading out between her legs intended to fly up and get her attention. Sollux just hopped into the air off the edge of the bench when a rush of air disoriented him, Feferi had gotten up!  Triumphantly she’d managed to get her outfit off, dropping it to the floor and inadvertently swatting the yellowblood to the ground in a net of salt scented fabric.

“Now… w)(here is he.” Fef thought as she carefully squeezed back out of the stall, clad now in a frilly top and skirt that had become a mightily straining tank top and miniskirt as they tried to hold on. But even after walking past the stares of shoppers around the whole store there was no sign of Sollux! He couldn’t seriously still be hiding in a stall could he? Maybe someone else was going to steal her goldblood fashion accessory idea and stole him! No, no that’s stupid. Probably pouting. Well maybe he wouldn’t get a show, hmph! Marching right back to the stall, she noticed something as she hunched down to make it under the door, her pile of discarded clothes shaking about of its own accord. Sollux wasn’t bold enough to try peeping was he? No, no she had experience with this sort of diminishing ailment. More than likely a series of comedic accidents had occurred and put him here… but that didn’t mean she couldn’t have a little fun with it.

After being trapped, tangled up in the absurdly engineered strength of the heiress’ normal outfit with nothing but the smell of salt, sweat, and leftover dampness for company, Sollux finally found his prison moving. Expecting to be dumped out any second now, it was a surprise when he was lifted high into the air, briefly glimpsing Fef’s face (she was usually smiling, but why the slight tyrian tint to her now?) through the bottom of what had to be her shirt. The seadweller deftly fit one powerful arm through each strap and pulled the outfit on, fitting it snugly into place. Also fitted into place, though snug was a worse description than ‘pinned utterly’, was Sollux Captor. Fef’s sizable chest provided cushion at least for the force exerted by her even more bountiful pectorals. Now, where was that crafts shop with the string… Or better yet, chain! 38D

[2twopiid]

all of them x2 B)

Send “✆” for a MORNING text. 

oh you already left for work.2mh. gue22 ii’ll waiit for a thou2and fuckiing hour2.hmu on your lunch ii want applebee’2.

wake up fuck2auce.

Send “✉” for a text that WASN’T SENT.

thii2 ii2 kiind of a long 2tory but tl;dr before ii went two go meet up wiith my tiimeliine ii told aa ii wa2 flu2hed for her but ii 2aiid ii couldn’t 2tiick around cau2e ii diidn’t want the feeliing2 and we’ve had conver2attiion2 and 2tuff 2iince then but iidk what’2 goiing on cau2e neiither of u2 ha2 mentiioned that entiire conver2atiion iidk iif ii actually iimagiined the whole thiing actually nvm ii’m not talkiing about thii2 yet.

ii’m 2o tiired, ii haven’t 2lept iin 2liime iin week2 cau2e ii’ve been kiickiin iit around your planet, and ii know you talked about fiiguriing that 2hiit out for me a whiile ago, but iidk, ii need two fiigure 2omethiing el2e out, ii ju2t, iidk. iidk!

Send “☎” for a RUSHED text.

can’t type fa2t enough holy fukc’’’’’’’’’’ 2hitt’

2ma2hed my horn on a doorway everyone 2aw me almo2tf uckiing diie lol typiign thii2 whiile 2PRIITNIIGN 2O NOBODY CAN A2K WHAT JU2T HAPPENED LMFAO FUCK THII2 NECKLACE.

Send “⁇” for a DRUNK text.

II LOVE YOU!! YOURR MY BOY!! 8p

dont walk iin the meal block wiithout 2hoe222 lol.al2o............dont a2k!

Send “✿” for a SUGGESTIVE text. 

diid ii tell you my bulge ii2 normal agaiin?now you don’t know what iit look2 liike. 8p

do you even realiize how niice iit ii2 two not have a liiterally cur2ed diick?

Send “ø” for a LATE NIGHT text.

iit’2 a22 o’clock and ii’m grumpy, you know what that mean2!

ii know you have work twomorrow or whatever but wake back up cau2e ii need you.al2o 2orry for changiing your riingtone for me whiile you weren’t lookiing but ii’m about two call you ju2t two make 2ure you 2ee thii2.

Send “✘” for a HATEFUL text.

hey ii know you thiink 2hiitty bug2 iin the game2 ii make you are HIILARIIOU2 but can you tell me about them 2o ii can fiix them or at lea2t make them feature2.

FUCK YOU THAT WA2NT A BUG IIT’2 2UPPO2ED TWO DO THAT IIT’2 NOT A JOKE.

Send “#” for a RANDOM text.

ii’m on the roof acro22 the 2treet from you. can you 2ee me?

wow ii can’t beliieve you’re dariing me two eat thii2 earth banana wiith the peel.can’t beliieve that’2 2omethiing you would defiiniitely pre22ure me two do.john, plea2e, thii2 ii2 crazy.

Send “@” for a SCARED text.

ii’m 2tuck rememberiing iit agaiin, ii can’t 2top, iit’2 2o fuckiing viiviid iit’2 liike iit’2 happeniing agaiin.

hey 2orry for de2troyiing your electriic biill wiith exce22iive u2e of your aiir condiitiioniing when you’re not around, iit’2 ju2t really fuckiing hot and every tiime ii break a 2weat ii paniic 2o plea2e don’t be mad ii’ll cover the extra ii ju2t need iit, ok? ii’ll try two fiigure 2omethiing el2e out but ii really ju2t can’t deal wiith iit rn.

Send “&” for a LOVING text.

ii’m 2o fuckiing glad ii have you around.

ii love you 2o much, ii’m 2orry ii’m 2hiitty at a2kiing for help when we both know ii need iit, but ii’m tryiing two be better at iit. ii’m tryiing two be better iin general cau2e you make me want two be better.

Send “%” for a CURIOUS text.

do you 2tiill have the game grub iin a jar? and iif ye2, why ii2 iit iin a jar? game grub2 are CLEARLY a cardboard box 2iitwoatiion.unrelated but do you thiink ii could 2iinglehandedly get thre2her2 2 (and thre2her2 1 ii gue22) two exii2t iin thii2 uniiver2e?

eat? y/n?[picture of food in a trash can]

Send “ツ” for an EXCITED text.

iit’2! go tiime! baby!

ii found the grub!!

Send “$” for an ACCIDENTAL text.

fgvvh;

do you know where he ended up? he left the 2e22iion, riight?

Send “♀” for a HEARTBREAKING text. 

ii know you 2aiid you wanted me two a2k for your help every tiime, and ii tell you mo2t of the tiime2, but 2ometiime2 ii don’t ju2t cau2e the 2hiit that 2end2 me iintwo iit ii2 ju2t 2o fuckiing dumb and ii know you don’t care about that but ii 2pent 2o long dealiing wiith 2hiit that actually 2hould eliiciit that kiind of re2pon2e from me, but now ii’m here breakiing 2hiit cau2e 2ome hot meat grea2e 2pla2hed ontwo me and 2ent me iintwo a paniic long enough two 2tart a crii2prange fiire, and, liike. ii’m coveriing the expen2e2 but ii fuckiing hate my2elf ii’m a fuckiing joke.

iidk iif ii’m even capable of gettiing better at thii2 poiint...

[a22hole]

[slams my hands on the table] all of them. all of th

Send “✆” for a MORNING text. 

iidk what kiind of 2chedule you run on but iit’2 morniing tiime here on good old earth and ii gue22 ii’m 2endiing thii2 two 2ay good morniing.uh… you can ju2t iignore thii2 hone2tly.

Send “✉” for a text that WASN’T SENT.  

ii’m not goiing two let my2elf fall for you. iit’2 not what ii want. iit’2 what he-

[message deleted!]

Send “☎” for a RUSHED text.

TX!! the beach, you and me. riight now. the 2ea liion2 are there and you have two 2ee them. 

Send “✿” for a SUGGESTIVE text. 

hey ii vaguely remember you mentiioniing your favoriite 2nack2 at 2ome poiint.want two come over and chiill? ii got 2ome ju2t for you.

Send “ø” for a LATE NIGHT text.

2o you know ii really keep wonderiing if 2omewhere out there there’2 a bada22 emperor me. liike can you iimagiine? emperor na2ty. lmao.

Send “✘” for a HATEFUL text.

ju2t 2o you know ii haven’t forgotten about the tiime you 2abotaged my wiin iin BGO. iit’2 2tiill on and you’re goiing down next tiime!! 

Send “#” for a RANDOM text.

lii2ten iit’2 not the 2iize that matter2. iit’2 the qualiity and quantiity.

Send “@” for a SCARED text.

ii can’t have dayterror2 yet here ii am thiinkiing two deeply about dave and JN iif 2omethiing happen2 two me. iit’ll be fiine, ii know iit’ll be fiine. ii’m goiing two make 2ure iit’ll be fiine. but damn iif ii’m not thiinkiing about them and how they’d feel all the tiime now.

Send “&” for a LOVING text.

you know you really are one of a kiind.whiich mean2 2omethiing when ii 2ay iit becau2e you know… ii liike thiing2 iin two2 we been knew, and there’2 techniically two alternate2 ju2t liike each other and. waiit… the poiint ii2.

TX you’re really 2omethiing el2e. 8)

Send “%” for a CURIOUS text.

ii’ve literally alway2 wondered thii2 about every alternate of your2 ever. do you guy2 ever liike… walk up two the wrong per2on and 2ay 2omethiing 2iilly two them? miine diid once. 2he 2piilled coffee all over KK when 2he meant two hand iit two KN. iit wa2 hiilariiou2. why 2end TZ two get the coffee? the memory haunt2 me two thii2 day.

Send “ツ” for an EXCITED text.

ii’ve got iit. the perfect game two beat you at. meet me at my place iin ten.

Send “$” for an ACCIDENTAL text.

for the fuckiing record iif ii hadn’t wanted that a22kiickiing iin the fiir2t place ii would’ve thrown you acro22 the ciity before you even got a punch iin.

waiit. not you. iignore thii2!!

Send “♀” for a HEARTBREAKING text. 

hey 2o. iif 2omethiing happen2 two me ju2t leave me there. ok?go be happy and forget about me.

[ghostydoof-blog]

==> John: Vent about a lot of things.

Last Night

ghostydoof i can't BELIEVE she's back here. honestly, i told her it wouldn't be a good idea to rush into things because they would just end up falling out of love or whatever the fuck happens with people that are in relationships like that. i TOLD her. i WARNED her. but no, she went and did it anyways. they even moved in together? who moves in with someone after only just meeting them and then getting into a serious relationship? really? it's like i'm stuck in some never ending romcom except the end isn't going to be a happy one. no, i'll have to be on my toes trying to make sure an undying idiot doesn't keep trying to off herself or something. it's bad enough she decided to come HERE instead of having me go there, and wow i'm pretty sure she won't want to go back because it's full of MEMORIES. memories of what? the month they were together? jesus. i have to get a new place. i'm on thin ice as it is and rose has pets. i literally can't deal with this.

ghostydoof and i'm so scared of having someone LIVE with me again because i was stuck in homes and just. i like my quiet alone time. i don't want her to live here. i'd rather YOU live with me, but i can't exactly get you a recuprecoon like i know you need to sleep. i can't stand this.

ghostydoof i don't even know what to do because i can't be mad at aradia for this. rose fucked up and now she's paying for it. i don't mind helping her but ugh. it's just one big i told you so!! i feel like i'm in high school or something this is so STUPID. ugh. sorry for going on and on about it, you're probably busy as it is. i'll see you tomorrow but i'd rather go to your place. goodlight. :*

Today

twofoldanihilation oh. 2hiit. do you.. need anythiing from me? iidk what ii can actually do two help, but we can do 2omethiing iif you need a dii2tractiion.

ghostydoof i just woke back up honestly. i didn't sleep last night and had to work.

ghostydoof i'll be fine, don't worry about it.

twofoldanihilation are you 2ure?

ghostydoof no.

twofoldanihilation want me two come over anyway?

ghostydoof if you aren't busy.

twofoldanihilation ii’m on the way.

ghostydoof i'll probably just fall asleep on you. i'm... so tired.

twofoldanihilation that’2 ok. ii’ll be a 2pace heater, lol.

ghostydoof i like this idea.

twofoldanihilation me two.

ghostydoof good because i am actually in a pretty bad mood.

twofoldanihilation ii can try two fiix that.

ghostydoof you probably can. i mean you DO so.

twofoldanihilation good.

ghostydoof rose isn't here anymore either so just come in and lay with me. i'm too tired to get up.

twofoldanihilation oh 2he left?

ghostydoof yeah i guess. not happy about that but whatever.

twofoldanihilation but you wanted her two go?

ghostydoof i don't know. she's not in the best mindset right now, i shouldn't want her gone i'm just so tired of trying to help her when she just won't change.

twofoldanihilation diid you 2ay that two her?

ghostydoof she went off to go hang out with a different john and then came back drunk out of her mind. and then passed out. so no. i haven't gotten to talk to her at all yet.

twofoldanihilation ok. diid 2he talk two you at all?

ghostydoof no. she probably preferred other me's company.

twofoldanihilation you thiink?

ghostydoof probably. she went out with him and then left me so.

twofoldanihilation 2he came back.

ghostydoof because she had nowhere else to go. it's whatever, i just don't like being used.

twofoldanihilation maybe you 2hould talk two her?

ghostydoof i don't want to right now. i'll probably blow up on her and i do not want to do that.

twofoldanihilation ok, that make2 2en2e. maybe when you’re le22 mad.

ghostydoof yeah. i don't know.

ghostydoof she came to me for advice in the first place and then totally blew off everything i said and now it's just one big told you so moment. i'm really sorry i ranted like that it was dumb of me.

twofoldanihilation ii diidn’t miind. ii’m 2orry ii wa2 a2leep for iit.

ghostydoof you don't have to be sorry about that.

twofoldanihilation ii ju2t don’t want two acciidentally blow you off.

ghostydoof you didn't!

twofoldanihilation ii mean iin general.

ghostydoof you aren't.

twofoldanihilation ok good. ii ju2t want two be 2ure.

ghostydoof you don't have to be there for every little thing. :*

ghostydoof you have other friends that need you too.

twofoldanihilation ii know but that diidn’t 2eem liike a liittle thiing.

ghostydoof it's eh.

twofoldanihilation 2tiill. 8*

ghostydoof shh.

twofoldanihilation ii thiink ii got AA two feel a liittle better, though.

ghostydoof that's good. i worry about her but i don't know her very well. i already stuck my nose in her business once. she probably doesn't like me much.

twofoldanihilation ii don’t thiink 2he dii2liike2 you. 2he helped me fiix thiing2 wiith you.

ghostydoof she did?

twofoldanihilation yeah, 2he told me ii wa2 beiing a fuckiing iidiiot. ii mean 2he diidn’t 2ay that, but 2he helped me realiize iit.

ghostydoof oh... hmm.

twofoldanihilation what?

ghostydoof nothing!!

twofoldanihilation ??

ghostydoof i'm glad she helped.

twofoldanihilation why hmm?

ghostydoof just thinking.

twofoldanihilation about??

ghostydoof a lot. i feel even worse.

twofoldanihilation why?

ghostydoof she helped you but i couldn't help her or rose.

twofoldanihilation ii wanted two be helped, though. riight? that’2 a thiing.

ghostydoof you did. i guess rose doesn't.

twofoldanihilation iif 2he doe2 2he’ll let you, riight?

ghostydoof i don't know. she's exhausting me though. i have been trying and trying to help and talk to her but she doesn't even want to see that she's worth the time.

ghostydoof i'm glad she's not here right now because i wouldn't be able to handle my anger.

twofoldanihilation ii wa2 about two 2ay 2omethiing but iit 2eemed liike bad adviice.

ghostydoof what is it?

twofoldanihilation ii wa2 gonna 2ay maybe 2he wont lii2ten becau2e you’re comiing at iit tryiing two be niice.

ghostydoof i don't know. i ripped into her the other day pretty bad and it still didn't help.

twofoldanihilation yeah 2ee? probably bad adviice.

ghostydoof it helped for all of five minutes i guess. like i said she seems pretty dead set on being a mess so it's whatever. am i like that?

twofoldanihilation you 2hould tell her what you’re thiinkiing. at 2ome poiint.

twofoldanihilation you diid that for a liittle biit. am ii?

ghostydoof you were in the beginning.

twofoldanihilation not anymore?

ghostydoof you're trying. so am i. i knew bugging you would be worth it though.

twofoldanihilation yeah. 8*

ghostydoof :* nothing screams i want friends more than a nerd saying they don't want friends, hehe.

twofoldanihilation iidk iif that’2 true.

ghostydoof uh you proved my theory.

twofoldanihilation iit take2 more than one iin2tance two 2upport a theory.

ghostydoof yeah but the full theory is actually just me knowing we'd be good buds from the get go and that if i bugged you enough we would be. no takesies backsies and all.

twofoldanihilation yeah, good bud2.

ghostydoof best buds.

twofoldanihilation 8* !!

ghostydoof :* ! i don't know, it'll get better eventually.

ghostydoof maybe it's just better that they find other people. or just, don't.

twofoldanihilation we’ll 2ee what happen2. ii don’t want two meddle two much.

ghostydoof yeah that kind of thing is a big deal to you guys isn't it?

twofoldanihilation ii mean iit doe2n’t have two be? ii ju2t don’t know enough about 2hiit two ju2tiify even tryiing two get that iinvolved.

ghostydoof basically rose said something in a way that was pretty shitty of her, and then did some equally shitty things and i don't blame aradia for being upset at all. this is like an adult version of high school drama and i hate it.

twofoldanihilation ii mean ii talked two aa but dream memory ii2n’t the be2t.

ghostydoof i wouldn't know the feeling but that's fair.

twofoldanihilation yeah.

ghostydoof i can try to give you more details to help her but. i don't think it's worth the trouble.

twofoldanihilation yeah, no. iif 2he need2 me agaiin ii’ll get iit from her.

ghostydoof yeah. i meant i don't think it's worth the trouble to keep thinking about it. i'm tired.

twofoldanihilation ju2t 2leep on me.

ghostydoof i will right after i'm done being comfy on you.

twofoldanihilation ok.

ghostydoof :*

[dualiitree2]

want two cau2e problem2. not 2ure what kiind yet.

[goldennautilus]

Betrayed: Dare to hope.

You’re sitting on your cot, knees drawn to your chest as you stare at the device in your hands. You hesitate, chewing your lip as you look at the open chat you have with Prince. Equius had told you that Prince was alive, but... You didn’t know whether to believe it. You give a slow exhale and message him.

goldenNautilus [GN] began trolling caligulouslyAntiquated [CA]! GN: ...hello? GN: uh GN: equiiu2 mentiioned that you were aliive. GN: or at lea2t that he had 2een you po2tiing. GN: ii'm not 2ure how that'2 po22iible, but, well. he ha2n't liied two me yet.

You stare intently at your phone, praying for him to respond to you. As the minutes tick by, nerves flood your system. He’s not answering. You didn’t expect him to, but you couldn’t help but hope that he would.

GN: you there, priince? GN: ...plea2e be there.

Gold clouds your vision and you quickly wipe the tears from your eyes before they can fall on the screen. Come on, you think, come on you stupid fucking fish, answer. You hate him. You hate him so much for doing this to you, it feels like you’re losing everything all over again. What had you been thinking, getting your hopes up like this? You were a fucking idiot, what was wrong with you? The dead don’t come back to life, the dead are gone and that’s the end of it! What were you thinking believing a troll you didn’t know. He may have worn the face of an old friend but you should never have trusted him.

GN: priince GN: plea2e GN: of all the thiing2 to be a liie dont let iit be thii2

You tell yourself to stop - beg yourself, even. You’re only hurting yourself. And god, does it hurt. You had dared to let yourself hope and this is what it got you.

GN: ... GN: priince?

Still no answer. You grit your teeth.

goldenNautilus is offline!

This is what you get. You can’t blame Equius for this. You should have known it was a mistake, should have known that there was no way for him to be alive. You give a sob, burying your hands in your hair and pulling. It wasn’t fair. It wasn’t fair it wasn’t fair it wasn’t fair!

goldenNautilus is online! GN: why diid you have to diie GN: how fuckiing dare you fuck wiith me liike thii2 GN: how fucking dare you leave me alone GN: i hate you so much GN: you were all that was left GN: you were all i had GN: and you GN: ... GN: i hate you so much goldenNautilus is offline!

You set the device aside and draw your knees to your chest, sobbing into them. It wasn’t fair. You had had that thought for so long. It wasn’t fair that Alternia was the way it was, it wasn’t fair that all of you had lost so much in the rebellion, it wasn’t fair that the Condesce was so much stronger than Feferi, it wasn’t fair that you had lost everything that day, it wasn’t fair that you had been shoved into a helm and forced to live when all you wanted was to die.

It wasn’t fair that he had died when he had betrayed you all just to live.

Aradia had told you long ago to not speak ill of the dead. You weren’t sure why. Whether it was a moral thing or it actually had something to do with the spirits she spoke to regularly, but you had been warned against it.

Now you threw that pile of hoofbeastshit aside, cursing Prince’s name and gripping your hair tightly. You wanted to scream and all that prevented you from doing so was knowing that the Engineer would come running if you started pitching a fit that he could hear. Instead, you grabbed your pillow, propping it on your knees and burying your face in it. You sank your fangs into the soft cushion to bite back any noise you would make.

Of course, then your anger started melting away. You tried to cling to it, but you knew that it was pointless. You weren’t angry. You dropped the pillow and bowed your head. You weren’t angry. You were sad. You were alone. Tears stream down your face, but instead of moving to wipe them off, you just sort of. Shut down. You lean against the wall your bed is tucked up against, just letting the tears silently stream down your face as you stare blankly at the wall across from you. Prince is dead. You have nothing. No purpose. No loved ones. Everything and everyone is gone.

You wish, not at all for the first time, that Eridan Ampora had let Her Imperious Condescension strike you down with her trident all that time ago.

But instead you were here, being forced to live a life you didn’t want.

You wish you could give him your heartbeat.

You wish you could give your life for his.

You wish you could bring him back.

Why did he have to go?

[pesterloglog]

Sollux Captor, Terezi Pyrope, Karkat Vantas

Act 5, page 2086

twinArmageddons [TA] began trolling gallowsCalibrator [GC]

TA: hey change of plan, we arent playiing thii2 game anymore.

TA: you dont have two bother recruiitiing, 2orry two wa2te your tiime.

GC: 1M NOT TH3 L34D3R 4NYMOR3

GC: K4RK4T 1S

TA: he ii2?

GC: H3 THR3W 4 T4NTRUM 4BOUT 1T SO 1 L3T H1M B3 TH3 R3D L34D3R

TA: ok that wa2 faiirly prediictable but that2 fiine.

TA: iill talk two hiim about iit.

GC: WH4TS GO1NG ON?

TA: nothiing, thii2 game 2uck2 and aa ii2 full of crap.

TA: 2orry about all thii2.

GC: >:?

twinArmageddons [TA] began trolling carcinoGeneticist [CG]

TA: hey change of plan, we arent playiing thii2 game anymore.

CG: HEY.

CG: GUESS WHO THE RED LEADER IS?

CG: I'M THE LEADER. IT'S ME.

CG: YOUR PLAN TO CRIPPLE YOUR RIVAL TEAM HAS FAILED.

TA: ii know, 2he told me, ii dont care.

TA: the game ii2 bad new2, iit wiill cau2e the end of the world, not 2top iit.

TA: 2o forget iit, ju2t go back two whatever you were doiing.

TA: wriitiing your 2hiitty code or whatever.

CG: HAHAHA! SO PATHETIC.

CG: THIS IS YET ANOTHER FEEBLE ATTEMPT TO WEAKEN YOUR OPPOSITION.

CG: TEREZI AND I HAVE ALREADY ESTABLISHED A CONNECTION AND WE ARE MAKING GREAT PROGRESS HERE.

CG: WE ARE A GREAT TEAM, AND I AM A FANTASTIC LEADER.

CG: WE WILL BEAT THIS GAME IN NO TIME, WHILE YOUR TEAM IS CLEARLY STILL ASLEEP AT THE THORAX.

TA: oh god.

TA: no you iidiiot, ii dont care about the game anymore.

TA: ii ju2t quiit, iim not playiing, you 2hould two.

CG: AMAZING.

CG: YOU'RE EITHER BEING REALLY PERSISTENT WITH THIS TRANSPARENT RUSE, OR YOU REALLY ARE JUST THAT SAD AND INCOMPETENT.

CG: NEITHER CASE DESERVES MY RESPECT OR MY FRIENDSHIP.

CG: IN FACT, YOU KNOW WHAT, FRIENDSHIP CANCELED.

CG: THERE IT'S OFFICIAL, BYE BYE FRIENDSHIP!

TA: oh liike you havent 2aiid that liike a biilliion tiime2.

TA: you arent iin any po2iitiion two que2tiion my competence.

TA: youre the wor2t programmer iive ever 2een, you dont know anythiing about computer2, why do you bother.

TA: the only thiing youre good at ii2 yelliing and makiing huge mii2take2.

TA: and beiing UGLY AND HORRIIBLE IN EVERY WAY, AND HAVIING 2TUPIID LIITTLE NUBBY HORN2.

CG: TO BE HONEST I DON'T SEE WHAT'S SO GREAT ABOUT YOUR PROGRAMMING OR HACKING.

CG: WHAT IS A HACKER EVEN? JUST SOME SMUG ASSHOLE IN MOVIES DOING FAKE THINGS AND MAKING UP WORDS.

CG: IT'S NOT EVEN A REAL THING TO BE, IT'S JUST SOME BULLSHIT TITLE YOU GAVE YOURSELF SO YOU CAN FEEL JUST A TINY BIT LESS LOATHESOME.

TA: oh no, more chiildii2h burn2, ii dont have two prove anythiing two you, iim a great hacker, periiod.

CG: NO IT'S ALL SO CLEAR NOW, YOU WERE A FRAUD ALL ALONG.

CG: WHAT DOES ALL THIS NONSENSICAL CODE YOU WROTE EVEN DO?

CG: IT'S ALL NONSENSE.

CG: LIKE A BLUFF. YOU JUST SAY, OH KARKAT WILL NEVER UNDERSTAND WHAT I WROTE IS BULLSHIT BECAUSE HE'S TOO DUMB TO FIGURE IT OUT.

CG: WELL YOU'RE BUSTED, THESE VIRUSES HERE I BET DO NOTHING AT ALL.

TA: waiit, KK...

CG: I BET IF I RAN THEM NOTHING BAD WOULD HAPPEN.

CG: MIGHT EVEN IMPROVE MY COMPUTER'S PERFORMANCE!

TA: no don't.

CG: HOW ABOUT THIS IDIOTIC PROGRAM WITH THE RED AND BLUE CODE, WHICH IS A MEANINGLESS THING TO DO WITH CODE ANYWAY.

CG: WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN? IT'S ANOTHER ONE OF YOUR SCAMS.

CG: WHY NOT SNEAK SOME BAD CLIP ART INTO THE FILES TOO, AND PRETEND THAT'S CODE???

TA: oh god, no dont run that, iim 2eriiou2.

CG: WHAT WOULD HAPPEN?

TA: iim not 2ure, but iit would be really, really bad iif you ran iit, ju2t dont.

CG: AH HA. JUST AS I THOUGHT, YOU CAN'T EVEN COME UP WITH A GOOD LIE WHEN I PRESS YOU ON IT.

CG: YOUR BLUFF HAS BEEN CALLED.

CG: COMPILING AS WE SPEAK, IT WILL AUTORUN WHEN IT FINISHES.

CG: AND NOW I HAVE TO GO ATTEND TO SOMETHING OUTSIDE, BECAUSE TEREZI IS DOING SOMETHING JUST UNSPEAKABLY STUPID RIGHT NOW.

CG: WHOOPS, FORGET I SAID THAT. IT WAS PRIVILEGED INFORMATION.

TA: you are the dumbe2t grubfucker on the planet, ii 2wear.

CG: LATER DOUCHE BAG.

TA: KK DO NOT RUN THAT CODE.

TA: hello??????????????

carcinoGeneticist's [CG'S] computer exploded.

TA: oh my god.

[apicultured-blog]

> Aradia + Sollux: Discuss Pressing Priorities

apicultured hey 1 have a press1ng quest10n why d1d y0u make an alter eg0 w1th a last name y0u cant/w0nt pr0n0unce just w0nder1ng, as 0ne d0es Last Thursday at 11:26 PM

biolacis ii've been thiinkiing about that a lot thii2 afternoon, and ii thiink ii've developed a hypothe2ii2. you 2ee, ii'm 2tupiid.

apicultured a1ght fa1r en0ugh

apicultured u 0k btw

biolacis hungover.

biolacis ii'm feeliing regret twoniight iin thii2 triilii'2.

apicultured blech! d1d y0u dr1nk c0ffee 0r eat s0meth1ng yet?

biolacis ii got liike, two gla22e2 of watered down 2cotch and almo2t blew iit. why diidn't anyone ever tell me ii turned iintwo a hoe when ii driink. ii'll get 2omethiing.

apicultured d1d y0u try t0 put the m0ves 0n karkat

biolacis no ii diid NOT. ii ju2t. yknow. got friiendly wiith everyone.

biolacis nothiing weiird about iit.

apicultured 0h s0 y0u put the m0ves 0n every0ne?

biolacis no AA ii diidn't put the move2 on everyone.

apicultured darn s0 y0u tr1ed t0 what, hug pe0ple? '1111 L00VE Y0U BRAHHHHHHH' pe0ple? because hahahaha 0h my g0d at least y0u d1dnt l0se y0ur glasses

biolacis that'2 what *you're* liike when you driink, fool.

apicultured hey hey,

apicultured theres n0 need f0r th1s, 1m like that /s0ber/

biolacis that'2 true. anyway2 yeah thank the god2 below ii 2tiill have my gla22e2.

apicultured y0u cant drag me 1f 1 can drag me better yeah

biolacis iif ii lo2t them ii'm pretty 2ure NP would've 2uperglued them two my face. god.

apicultured y eha

apicultured the l1sp came cl0se but ykn0w hell th1nk 0f s0meth1ng plaus1ble

biolacis ii don't thiink he 2u2pected anythiing. he 2eem2 two thiink ii wa2 ju2t embarra22ed about iit.

biolacis god how diid ii thiink ii wouldn't have two 2ay my full name at 2ome poiint.

apicultured d1d y0u p1ck 1t 0r d1d npe *nepeta als0 hey 1t happens t0 the best 0f us, and 1n th1s, 1t seems, we are n0t the best 0f us why b0ther h1d1ng the l1sp th0ugh? 1ts n0t l1ke y0ure the 0nly tr0ll w1th 1t

biolacis ii diid. ii fiigured 2iince ii'm named after 2tar2 iit would be ea2y two piick more 2tar2 for an oh that'2. that'2 a diirect correlatiion. AA.

biolacis ii'm goiing two diie a 2wiift and merciile22 death 2ome day 2oon and ii want you two wriite on my grave2tone "totally had iit comiing." anyway2 ii wa2 only tryiing two hiide iit from hiim.

biolacis ii diidn't want another rea2on for hiim two be 2u2piiciiou2.

apicultured that 1s actually a d1rect c0rrelat10n wh1ch 1s amaz1ng 0f c0urse 0ur sense 0f theatr1cs w0nt be 1mpeded by th1ngs like "c0mm0n sense" h0wever 1ts n0t l1ke "hey this weird tealblood IS SECRETLY THE HEIR BECAUSE THEY HAVE SIMILAR NAMES" 1s a th0ught th0ught by pe0ple 0f the sane persuas10n s0 1 th1nk 1t sh0uld be f1ne!

apicultured als0 karkat 1s waaaay t00 l0g1cal and clear m1nded t0 ever catch w1nd 0f the stup1d absurd bullsh1t we are d01ng, lets be real

apicultured l1ke, wh0 even d0es th1s

biolacis 2orry, ii wa2 out wiith NP for awhiile and when ii came back ii dove iintwo a call and ii can't ii heard hiim cryiing AA. ii don't know what happened but ii heard hiim cryiing, ii couldn't even a2k what wa2 wrong, ii.

biolacis do we have two even do thii2, why can't we ju2t tell hiim.

apicultured 1 d0nt kn0w - remember 1 sa1d the exact same th1ng? 1 th1nk 1ts y0ur secret t0 tell and 0n the pract1cal s1de h1s res0urces can 0nly help us help us d0....whatever the fuck were d01ng 1 guess d0 y0u kn0w why he was cry1ng? 0n0

biolacis my re2pon2e two all of the2e thiing2: ii don't know. ii acciidentally came iin on what ii thiink wa2 a priivate conver2atiion and he wa2 drunk and kept apologiiziing for not beiing compo2ed.

apicultured 0n0

biolacis the other per2on wa2 drunk two and wa2 about two tell me what happened after he went two bed but iit felt weiird and creepy two let them tell me wiithout hii2 knowledge.

apicultured thats true...wh0 were they?

biolacis iidk, 2omebody named liil.

biolacis iit wa2 weiird and ii feel liike a real creep about the whole thiing.

apicultured 1ts n0t l1ke y0u eavesdr0pped 0n purp0se 0r s0meth1ng

apicultured 1 als0 feel k1nda bad f0r keep1ng 1t a secret fr0m h1m... he t00k y0ur death really hard s0 d1d we all really, but espec1ally h1m

biolacis yeah. ii'm. 2tiill 2orry, AA.

apicultured 1t wasnt y0ur fault 1t happened, sh1td1ngus n0ne 0f 1t 1s.

biolacis part of iit wa2, cockwea2el. but ii'm 2orry for the griief iit cau2ed you. whether iit wa2 my fault or not, iit 2tiill hurt you and everyone el2e.

apicultured bppthtphpbpthpthph hey, d0nt w0rry ab0ut 1t

apicultured 1m just glad y0ure back and 1m n0t dead

biolacis me: (actiively worryiing about iit) cool ii won't worry about iit. ii'm glad we're both here two.

apicultured wh0 even k1dnapped y0u 1ll make the1r tech strangle them 0r s0meth1nf fuck yeah be1ng here 1 1nv1ted karkat f0r a m0v1e 0r game marath0n th0 he hasnt answered heads up s0 y0u kn0w 1f y0u can be there 0r n0t 1f he says yes

apicultured th0ugh 1 v0te f0r tell1ng h1m because 1 d0nt really kn0w what r1sk c0uld 1t be

biolacis 2ome douchebag named eriidan. he call2 hiim2elf "rope2" but iit'2 2o 2tupiid that he can't get anyone el2e two call hiim that.

biolacis al2o thank2 for the head2 up, ii'm. not really 2ure what ii'm goiing two do yet.

biolacis NP thiink2 he'2 a huge liiabiiliity becau2e of hii2 2hiit wiith the paparazzii, whiich ii can 2ee, but.

apicultured . . . . . .1 th1nk 1 kn0w h1m fr0m fvrrp. he kept h1tt1ng 0n me and 1 kept ru1n1ng h1s tech. well, hed rather d1e than betray y0ur secret, s0 all y0ud have t0 d0 1s n0t be 0verly cl1ngy 1n public 1 guess?

biolacis what the fuck. and ii thought he wa2 a creep two me lmao, of cour2e the guy hiit2 on dii2iintere2ted people onliine.

biolacis ii got two punch hiim iin the face when NP broke me out 2o that wa2 pretty 2weet. ii 2hould've hiit hiim extra hard iin your honor. and 🤷‍♀️. me not beiing overly-cliingy, ii have been told, ii2 iimpo22iible, but ii'll try talkiing two NP about iit agaiin. ii want u2 all two be able to hang out twogether. ii don't want thii2 two be a weiird thiing between all four of u2, no le22.

apicultured hahaha, d1d y0u kn0ck a t00th 0ut?

apicultured hahaha g0dd 1 kept awaken1ng h1s b10tech's wh1thered breed1ng subr0ut1nes s0 h1s c0mputer w0uld try t0 hump h1m 0r anyth1ng nearest and h0nestly 1m st1ll pr0ud 0f that well, 0nly 1n publ1c! wrap ar0und h1m 1n pr1vate as much as y0u want my guy, 1ts n0t l1ke 1 havent bas1cally d0ne that t0 every0ne s1nce my ressurect10n 1...1 want us all t0 hang 0ut and have fun t00.

biolacis ooooh my gooood.

biolacis that'2 fuckiing hiilariiou2. ii would have paiid my own weiight iimperiial2 two 2ee that 2lobberiing liittle ba2tard get t-bagged by hii2 own computer. iif ii ever 2ee hiim agaiin (let'2 hope not) ii'll ab2olutely 2nag a tooth for you.

biolacis 2iigh. ii. ju2t want u2 two be able two all catch up on the tiime we've mii22ed out on each other all the2e 2weep2. ii wii2h we diidn't have two do iit 2eparately. or 2neakiily. you and KK alway2 got two 2pend tiime twogether, and KK and ii diid two, but never the three of u2. ii alway2 really wanted that. hopefully. hopefully iit won't alway2 be liike thii2.

apicultured 1f he tr1es t0 get at y0u aga1n y0ull see a rerun 0f the 0le t-bag v1rus, but yeah lets av01d h1m 0n0 1t w1ll happen! y0u w0nt h1de away f0rever. cm0n lets ask nep

biolacis ehehe. ii'll have two a2k you for the 2criipt for that one. alriight.

biolacis rub2 face.

apicultured 1ll gladly share 0u0 we can talk t0 her t0gether 1f y0u l1ke als0 we can play v1de0games bef0re talk1ng t0 her 0r s0meth1ng, 1 dunn0 well get thr0ugh th1s, s0llux, we g0t th1s

biolacis iif we play viideo game2 then you have two promii2e not two kiick my a22 at lea2t one tiime. iit'2 alriight. ii can do iit, unle22 you wanna talk two her two.

apicultured hahahahah weeeaaak

biolacis we'll be okay.

apicultured but 0kay, scrubl0rd

apicultured and yeah sure mental backup and sh1t hell yeah we w1ll

biolacis ii *am* weak. ii weiigh 90 lb2 and ii liive on a nectar2uckler'2 diiet. ii'm talkiing whiite chocolate chiip2 and miike'2 hard lemonade. let me make a group chat.

apicultured please eat s0me hearty p1zza 1 beg 0f y0u n1ce

biolacis ii eat a 2liice of piizza. ii 2hriink by two iinche2.

apicultured 1ts g00d f0r y0u!

biolacis ii'm a healthy boy.

[ceescedasticity]

0k: pARTY tIME (1)

Follows Progress Rayport

adiosToreador left a file in the dropbox

AT: wELL, AT: nINEEYES, HAS JUST OPENED, THE FIRST INTOXICANT BARREL, AT: dESPITE, THE DUTY SHIFT JUST BEGINNING, AT: sO i GUESS, THE PARTY HAS STARTED?

caligulasAquarium left a file in the dropbox

CA: uggghhhhh not for us CA: wwe'vve got twwo days of classes and then the ART SHOWW CA: my one consolation is howw Itchee is freaking out CA: wwhen this wwhole showw thing started he wwas boasting about howw he wwas going to do a breathtakingly beautiful coral mosaic CA: his wwords CA: but I guess it hasn’t been wworking out for him

carcinoGeneticist left a file in the dropbox

CG: IT SEEMS THE COMMODORE KILLJOY IMPERSONATION CONTEST HAS STARTED. CG: IT’S SORT OF DISCONCERTING. CG: MY IMAGINARY MONEY IS ON GRAYWIRE.

apocalypseArisen left a file in the dropbox

AA: speaking 0f bets AA: i have just been invited t0 j0in the necr0path betting p00ls 0n: AA: the rate 0f party related fatalities f0r this new h0liday AA: and AA: the rate at which these fatalities will attempt t0 c0ntinue partying 0r 0therwise be nuisances s0 that we are called t0 dispel them bef0re the end 0f the h0liday AA: i am g0ing t0 bet 0n a slightly l0wer fatality rate AA: as everything IS spread 0ut 0ver six days s0 pe0ple will pr0bably take it a little sl0wer AA: but im n0t sure ab0ut the immediate nuisance rate

carcinoGeneticist left a file in the dropbox

CG: IT’LL BE HIGH.

arachnidsGrip left a file in the dropbox

AG: 8et high!

terminallyCapricious left a file in the dropbox

TC: i dOnT KnOw aBoUt eVeRyOnE ElSe TC: bUt iF I WaS CeLeBrAtInG A BrAnD NeW HoLiDaY I NeVeR CeLeBrAtEd bEfOrE TC: AnD ThEn sOmEoNe kIlLeD Me bEfOrE I WaS DoNe TC: iD WaNt tO FiNiSh cElEbRaTiNg

apocalypseArisen left a file in the dropbox

AA: rate 0f sticking ar0und high, yes AA: but will they necessarily need t0 be dispelled? AA: 0r will 0ther pe0ple fail t0 n0tice and/0r be b0thered by them? AA: theyre just partying AA: hyp0thetically

adiosToreador left a file in the dropbox

AT: eVEN FESTIVE GHOSTS, CAN BE UNSETTLING, IF YOU’RE NOT USED TO THEM? AT: i WOULD, ALSO SAY HIGH,

apocalypseArisen left a file in the dropbox

AA: hmmmmm

twinArmageddons left a file in the dropbox

TA: ehehehehe TA: wiireburn ju2t walked iin wiith a portable iintoxiicatiion te2t uniit TA: thiing2 may get ugly iin here

arsenicCatnip left a file in the dropbox

AC: :33 < we are on regular duty rota today AC: :33 < although someone has hung up streamers! AC: :33 < soon they will start moving shifts around so the more senior people can have their purrfurred time off AC: :33 < although it’s already been agreed that efurryone with a quadrant in the art show gets time to go to that!

caligulasAquarium left a file in the dropbox

CA: that is really really not necessary

arsenicCatnip left a file in the dropbox

AC: :33 < :33

……………

gallowsCalibrator left a file in the dropbox

GC: JUST F1N1SH3D MY L4ST CL4SS OF TH3 HOL1D4Y! GC: 1T W4S 1NT3R3ST1NG – TH3Y SUGG3ST3D W3 LOOK 4T TH1S WHOL3 TH1NG 4S 4N OPPORTUN1TY TO PR4CT1C3 P4C1NG OURS3LV3S. GC: NOW 1TS C4S3 PR3S3NT4T1ON!

caligulasAquarium left a file in the dropbox

CA: I’m jealous CA: vvery vvery jealous CA: vvery vvery vvery jealous

arachnidsGrip left a file in the dropbox

AG: For someone in class you’re in the drop8ox a lot. AG: Just saying. AG: :::;)

caligulasAquarium left a file in the dropbox

CA: …

gallowsCalibrator left a file in the dropbox

GC: 4NYW4Y GC: ON3 OF TH3 4CT1V3 PURSU1T L3G1SL4C3R4TORS JUST G4V3 US 4 SUMM4RY OF TH3 R3ST OF TH3 G4TH3R1NG SW4RM C4S3 GC: SO 4FT3R W3 PR3S3NT OUR WORK W3 C4N S4Y WH4T 3LS3 W4S UNCOV3R3D 4S 4 R3SULT OF OUR 1NV3ST1G4T1ONS! GC: 4T TH1S R4T3 1 TH1NK W3 COULD BOTH G3T ST4G3 FR1GHT 4ND F4LL FL4T ON OUR F4C3S 4ND W3D G3T M4RK3D W3LL GC: S1NC3 W3 FOUND 4 GC: YOU KNOW GC: 4CTU4L C4S3 OF 1NT3R3ST TO R34L L3G1SL4C3R4TORS.

cuttlefishCuller left a file in the dropbox

CC: Congrats! CC: 8)

gallowsCalibrator left a file in the dropbox

GC: SO GC: TH3 FULL 1NV3ST1G4T1ON H4S B33N WR4PP3D UP. GC: 4RR3STS H4V3 B33N M4D3. GC: TH3 PLOT H4S B33N FO1L3D 4ND TH3 CONSP1R4TORS D3T41N3D.

twinArmageddons left a file in the dropbox

TA: the crappy aii an2weriing 2y2tem roundly mocked for faiiliing two notiice anythiing wa2 goiing on TA: dont thiink domii2 goiing two forgiive hiim for a whiile yet

gallowsCalibrator left a file in the dropbox

GC: MY PO1NT 1S GC: YOU C4N C4LL OFF TH3 GHOST BODYGU4RDS NOW GC: 4G, YOU C4N T4K3 TH3M G4RP1NG OR SOM3TH1NG GC: TH3Y MUST H4V3 MOR3 3NT3RT41N1NG TH1NGS TH3Y W4NT TO DO

arachnidsGrip left a file in the dropbox

AG: No I can’t. AG: :::;)

gallowsCalibrator left a file in the dropbox

GC: … GC: TH3Y SHOW3D UP 4FT3R YOU H4D TO GO PL4N TH3 TH3M3D G4RP1NG.

arachnidsGrip left a file in the dropbox

AG: :::;) AG: I don’t make the rules!

gallowsCalibrator left a file in the dropbox

GC: YOUR3 S4Y1NG 1T W4SNT YOU WHO 4PPO1NT3D NON-YOU BODYGU4RDS.

arachnidsGrip left a file in the dropbox

AG: :::;)

gallowsCalibrator left a file in the dropbox

GC: STOP. W1NK1NG.

arachnidsGrip left a file in the dropbox

AG: ;;;;) AG: Technically I think that’s a 8link.

gallowsCalibrator left a file in the dropbox

GC: OK4Y. CG, W1LL YOU PL34S3 C4LL OFF TH3 GHOST BODYGU4RDS? GC: 1TS R34LLY NOT N3C3SS4RY!

caligulasAquarium left a file in the dropbox

CA: let me knoww howw that wworks out for you

cuttlefishCuller left a file in the dropbox

AG: I think akshoally he’s doing prep for the ghost concert?

gallowsCalibrator left a file in the dropbox

GC: TH3N 1M SUR3 H3D B3 H4PPY TO H4V3 4N 3XCUS3 TO L34V3. GC: SO 1 C4N T4LK TO H1M 4ND T3LL H1M TO C4LL OFF TH3 BODYGU4RDS.

twinArmageddons left a file in the dropbox

TA: okay ju2t a hiint TA: CG wa2 very much iin favor of gettiing you gho2t bodyguard2 TA: but gho2t2 who dont per2onally know you 2tayiing on ta2k and not doiing any iinciidental hauntiing? TA: tho2e are not gho2t2 takiing order2 from CG

gallowsCalibrator left a file in the dropbox

GC: … GC: … GC: 44! GC: TH1S 1S G3TT1NG 4WKW4RD!

adiosToreador left a file in the dropbox

AT: yOU SHOULD MAYBE, HAVE THOUGHT OF THAT, AT: bEFORE, YOU HAD A CLOSE CALL, WITH DANGEROUS TRAFFICKERS?

gallowsCalibrator left a file in the dropbox

GC: 4R3NT YOU SUPPOS3D TO B3 MOPP1NG SOM3TH1NG 4BOUT NOW?

……………

centaursTesticle left a file in the dropbox

CT: D –> Would there happen to be any CT: D –> “GARPing” CT: D –> Taking place on the Brutal Domination?

carcinoGeneticist left a file in the dropbox

CG: … CG: SOMEONE WAS SUPPOSED TO WARN YOU ABOUT THAT. CG: THEY AREN’T IN THE WORKSHOP, ARE THEY? THEY ARE SUPPOSED TO BE STRICTLY AVOIDING THE KILLER ROBOTS.

centaursTesticle left a file in the dropbox

CT: D –> They are not CT: D –> We encountered it CT: D –> Them CT: D –> While restocking our provisions

carcinoGeneticist left a file in the dropbox

CG: WHAT ARE YOU UP TO, ANYWAY? CG: THE ROBOT FIGHT ISN’T FOR A WHILE YET, RIGHT? CG: DOING REGULAR WORK?

centaursTesticle left a file in the dropbox

CT: D –> No CT: D –> I am assisting Naspar in checking all the completed robots CT: D –> For disintegration rays or any similar devices likely to cause collateral damage CT: D –> Or to damage the robot Mother Grub CT: D –> Although that last is unlikely

carcinoGeneticist left a file in the dropbox

CG: SOUNDS IMPORTANT. CG: WELL, IF THE GARPING GETS OUT OF HAND YELL AT AG. CG: IF SHE DOESN’T LISTEN, TELL AA.

arachnidsGrip left a file in the dropbox

AG: It is NOT out of hand!!!!!!!! AG: And I did warn CT, I left like eight different messages a8out it.

carcinoGeneticist left a file in the dropbox

CG: WAS THIS WHILE HE WAS IN THE MEDICULLING BAY RECOVERING FROM THE CEILING COLLAPSE?

arachnidsGrip left a file in the dropbox

AG: Not all of them!

……………

adiosToreador left a file in the dropbox

AT: yOU KNOW WHAT aa SAID, ABOUT TAKING THINGS SLOWLY OVER SIX DAYS? AT: aND gc’S INTRUCTORS, ABOUT PACING ONESELF? AT: i THINK THERE ARE SOME PEOPLE, IN THIS SQUADRON, AT: wHO AREN’T FAMILIAR, WITH THOSE CONCEPTS,,,

arsenicCatnip left a file in the dropbox

AC: :|| < your ship too, huh?

twinArmageddons left a file in the dropbox

TA: pretty 2ure iit2 EVERY 2hiip

adiosToreador left a file in the dropbox

AT: i MEAN, IT’S BEEN A DAY, AT: iT’S NOT implausible FOR SOMEONE TO BE THIS DRUNK NOW, AT: jUST, AT: wON’T THEY THEN, BE SPENDING THE REST OF THE HOLIDAY, AT: hUNG OVER?

arsenicCatnip left a file in the dropbox

AC: :|| < ac hasn’t actually seen the culprit here AC: :|| < just smelled the aftermath

adiosToreador left a file in the dropbox

AT: ,,, AT: fRIEAS SEEMS TO THINK, THAT CONTINUALLY REMAINING DRUNK, WILL PREVENT THIS, AT: bUT i’M NOT SURE, THAT IS MEDICALLY FEASIBLE?

arsenicCatnip left a file in the dropbox

AC: :?? < um… AC: :?? < ac isn’t sure about that? AC: :?? < maybe they just haven’t thought at all about the rest of the holiday

adiosToreador left a file in the dropbox

AT: oR, AT ALL, AT: pERIOD,

twinArmageddons left a file in the dropbox

TA: any amount of thought would have told certaiin people that 2howiing up drunk iin front of wiireburn would be a terriible iidea TA: they arent dead but they probably wii2h they are

apocalypseArisen left a file in the dropbox

AA: acc0rding t0 b0nebelts c0ntact in the squadr0n m0rtality register AA: we just had the first 0f the requisite h0liday ‘partied in airl0ck, f0rg0t which was the right d00r’ fatalities AA: i was skeptical but…

adiosToreador left a file in the dropbox

AT: oH, THERE YOU ARE, AT: dID gc EVER GET IN TOUCH WITH YOU?

apocalypseArisen left a file in the dropbox

AA: n0t directly AA: shes n0t getting rid 0f the b0dyguards that easily anyway

……………

twinArmageddons left file CAVERN2 UPDATE FROM DII2ORDERLYIIMPUL2E in the dropbox

DI: Maryam want=d m= to t=ll you sh=’s b==n summon=d to th= Inn=r Cav=rns for Things. DI: Appar=ntly important things? DI: And =v=rything s==ms to b= going w=ll so far. DI: Will updat= lat=r DI: Assuming I hav=n’t chok=d to d=ath on th= rising t=nsion l=v=l.

cuttlefishCuller left a file in the dropbox

CC: Whale, that sounds CC: Momentous.

twinArmageddons left a file in the dropbox

TA: no 2hiit

cuttlefishCuller left a file in the dropbox

CC: I was kind of expecting everyone else to jump in to sound alarmed… CC: I know CG’s stuck explaining things to live necropaths CC: …And AG’s GARPing CC: …And TC’s last-minute rehearsing

twinArmageddons left a file in the dropbox

TA: AA ii2 de-hauntiing one of the cateriingblock2 TA: AT and AC 2tiill on duty two TA: CA ii2 iin cla22, ii gue22 actually payiing attentiion for once? TA: iidk about GC or CT but theyve got 2tuff two do…

twinArmageddons left a file in the dropbox

TA: iinconveniient tiimiing TA: thii2 really meriit2 2ome good old ma22 anxiiety

cuttlefishCuller left a file in the dropbox

CC: … CC: Guess it’s a good thing the ghost conchert is starting and we can send plenty of good vibes! CC: 8)

twinArmageddons left a file in the dropbox

TA: … TA: ii 2uck at good viibe2 TA: 2end 2ome for me two

[apathygender]

I got my laptop working again and went looking around and for some god awful reason opened up pesterchum. all of my old logs are gone except for, apparently, something i did on my own three years ago because i’m a fuckin dork who missed playing with friends.

i will now put my silliness under a read more

 -- twiceAggrieved [TA] began trolling carnivorousGravitation [CG] at 00:22 --

TA: KK.

CG: FUCK.

CG: NO. I'M NOT DOING THIS.

TA: ye2 you are.

TA: we have two talk.

CG: TALK ABOUT WHAT? HOW WE HAVEN'T BEEN IN DIRECT CONTACT FOR WHO KNOWS HOW MANY SHIT STAINED SWEEPS NOW?

CG: THE FACT THAT NONE OF US HAVE SEEN EACH OTHER OR THE PEOPLE WE CARE ABOUT MOST WHILE WE FESTER IN OUR PUSS FILLED BOILS WE CALL HOME?

TA: ii 2ee you're lo2iing your touch on the2e metaphor2.

CG: I AM NOT LOSING MY TOUCH, YOU GOBBLEHEADED FUCKFOOT. YOU JUST HAVEN'T BEEN AROUND TO HEAR THEM IN A LONG TIME.

TA: 2ure. gobbleheaded fuckfoot ii2 a cla22iic. my mii2take.

TA: ju2t get iin the memo.

CG: WHO IN THESE TEN THOUSAND HELLSCAPES IS IN A MEMO, VOLUNTARILY, WITH THE TWO OF US?

TA: youll 2ee iif you hurry up and accept my iinviitatiion.

CG: FINE.

 -- carnivorousGravitation [CG] gave up trolling twiceAggrieved [TA] at 01:22 --

carnivorousGravitation [CG] RIGHT NOW joined memo on board #08152X.

GG: Thanks for coming, Karkat.

CG: WHOA HEY WHOA FUCK THIS. I AM NOT HERE FOR THIS GOD DAMNED MEETING.

TA: KK come on. thii2 ii2 iimportant.

CG: NOPE. NOW I KNOW WHY YOU DIDN'T TELL ME WHO IT WAS. I SHOULD HAVE FUCKING KNOWN IT WOULD END UP LIKE THIS.

CG: GOOD JOB, PISS SPIT. YOU ALMOST GOT ME AGAIN. BUT THIS TIME I'M NOT STICKING AROUND TO READ ANY OF THAT BLUE SUGAR THREAD CANDY DRIVEL.

GG: Karkat, please. It's about our friends.

GG: I'm getting worried.

CG: OUR FRIENDS? OH! OH FUCK! I FORGOT WE HAD THOSE!

CG: GET WITH THE SCHEDULED PROGRAM, HEIRESS OF CONFECTIONARY DEMISE. WE'RE AS SURROUNDED BY FRIENDS AS THE SCARRED VIOLET SEA CAPTAIN IS SURROUNDED BY ADORING FANS.

TA: defiiniitely lo2iing your touch.

CG: SHUT UP.

GG: Huh?

CG: NOTHING.

CG: THE POINT IS THAT WE DON'T HAVE FRIENDS.

CG: YOU DON'T HAVE FRIENDS.

CG: I DON'T HAVE FRIENDS.

CG: WE ARE SANS FRIENDS.

TA: we have each other. that2 two friiend2 each.

CG: INCREDIBLE. SOMETHING SENTIMENTAL FROM THE EMOTIONLESS TALKING COMPUTER SOFTWARE. WHEN WAS YOUR LAST UPDATE, CYNIC.EXE?

GG: Karkat!

GG: How dare you!

TA: no, iit2 okay. ii updated la2t niight.

TA: thii2 patch came wiith a fuck2 fiilter.

TA: ii have no fuck2 comiing through, therefore ii have none two giive.

GG: Sollux...

CG: HA!

CG: HA HA!

CG: THAT WAS SARCASTIC LAUGHTER.

CG: YOU'RE A FUCKING IDIOT.

CG: THIS IS WHY I DON'T TALK TO YOU PEOPLE ANYMORE.

TA: and yet you're 2tiill here.

CG: NO I'M NOT. THIS IS A FIGMENT OF YOUR PAN'S DEMENTED SLEEP DEPRIVATION.

CG: LITERALLY NONE OF THIS CONVERSATION IS HAPPENING. YOU ARE LOSING YOUR MIND, AND YOU NEED TO GET INTO YOUR RECUPERACOON BEFORE IT'S TOO LATE.

TA: iit2 defiiniitely two late.

GG: Guys, please.

GG: I know you haven't done this in a while, but we did start this memo for a reason.

TA: riight. 2orry, crockpot.

CG: HEY, I NEVER SAID I WAS PARTICIPATING IN THIS.

GG: You volunteered by not leaving the memo.

GG: Now shush your cranky mouth so I can tell you why you're here.

CG: RUDE.

TA: 2hut down.

CG: GO AHEAD, EYESORE.

CG: IT OCCURS TO ME THAT I HAVE ABSOLUTELY NOTHING BETTER TO DO THAN LISTEN TO YOUR ASININE MONOLOGUING.

GG: First of all, I do not monologue.

GG: Second of all, you are darn right you have nothing better to do.

GG: Sollux and I were looking around this city, and we found some disturbing things.

GG: We thought you of all people would be interested.

CG: ME OF ALL PEOPLE?

CG: CAREFUL; YOU ARE BORDERING ON THE DISCRIMINATORY.

GG: Oh, please.

TA: 2hut up, kk. youll under2tand 2oon enough.

GG: We found some posters.

CG: WAIT.

CG: HOLD ON.

GG: What?

TA: thii2 ii2 actually kiind of a biig deal what could be iimportant enough iin your boriing a22 liife two iinterupt

CG: SOMETHING JUST CLICKED IN MY THINKPAN.

CG: YOU DICKNUGGETS WERE LOOKING AROUND A CITY TOGETHER?

CG: AS IN YOU WERE IN THE SAME PLACE AT THE SAME TIME?

CG: WHEN DID THIS START HAPPENING AND WHY DIDN'T I HEAR ABOUT IT?

GG: Oh my god.

TA: iit2 not liike that, you fettered mammalian fii2h fucker.

CG: IT'S EXACTLY LIKE THAT. YOU LEFT ME OUT AGAIN.

CG: THIS IS AT LEAST THE ONE HUNDRED THIRTY FIFTH TIME.

GG: That's an oddly specific number.

TA: iim 2orry, KK. you're riight. we 2hould have called you.

GG: Your the one who said we don't have friends and acted like you never wanted to speak to me again.

CG: OF COURSE I WANTED TO TALK TO YOU.

CG: WHY DO YOU THINK I LOG INTO TROLLIAN EVERY NIGHT?

CG: DO YOU THINK IT'S FUN TO STARE AT A LONG LIST OF "OFFLINE" CHUMPS WHO I USED TO SCREAM AT ON A REGULAR BASIS?

CG: I'M A SAD LONELY CHILD, JANE.

CG: I MISS MY FRIENDS.

TA: damn way two lay iit all down out of nowhere.

CG: YEAH, WELL. IT'S BEEN A WHILE.

GG: Karkat... I'm sorry.

GG: I didn't think that you might feel the same.

CG: WELL, I DO. DO YOU REALIZE HOW LONG IT'S BEEN SINCE I'VE SEEN MY FAVORITE COLORS ANTAGONIZING ME IN A CHAT WINDOW?

TA: iit2 been a long tiime.

GG: Too long.

CG: NO KIDDING.

TA: then what do you 2ay two joiiniing u2 iin the biig ciity.

CG: WHAT?

GG: That's a great idea! Then we can just show you what we found instead of trying to describe it.

CG: WHAT BIG CITY? YOU HAVEN'T SAID A NAME OF YOUR LOCATION AT ANY POINT IN THIS EXCHANGE OF TEXT.

CG: YOUR LACK OF SPECIFICS IS GETTING IRRITATING.

CG: ALSO HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET TO SAID LOCATION WHERE YOU'VE BEEN SPENDING AN UNKNOWN AMOUNT OF TIME TOGETHER?

TA: look out2iide your wiindow.

CG: I SWEAR TO TROLL CHRIST, IF YOU ARE FLOATING OUTSIDE MY WINDOW RIGHT NOW, I WILL THROW MY ENTIRE DRESS AT YOU.

TA: relax, iim not floatiing out2iide your hiive.

CG: FINE.

GG: I wish I could be there right now to watch this.

CG: FUCK.

CG: YOU LIAR.

TA: ii diidnt liie. ii 2aiid ii wa2nt floatiing.

TA: iim 2tandiing.

CG: IT'S THE SAME PRINCIPLE, SNOTFACE.

GG: Snotface? Are you four years old?

CG: I AM IN SHOCK RIGHT NOW, GIVE ME A BREAK.

TA: he2 al2o bur2t iintwo tear2.

TA: 2o hone2tly, you are the 2notface.

GG: Aw, Karkat! Don't cry.

CG: I AM NOT CRYING.

CG: I AM PISSED BEYOND RATIONAL COMPREHENSION.

TA: alriight, 2top typiing at me whiile 2tandiing iin front of your wiindow.

TA: jane ii2 waiitiing for u2 back at the hou2e.

CG: ARE YOU SERIOUS?

GG: Completely and totally.

GG: Please come along. You can pack if you need to.

CG ceased responding to memo.

TA: lmao iit2 two late. he2 already run out the door and wrapped hii2 arm2 around me.

TA: what a biig wiiggler.

GG: Hoo hoo hoo!

GG: Don't lie to me, Solpatch. I know you're crying too.

TA: 2orry, lo2iing connectiion. bad 2iignal here.

TA: 2ee you iin 2even miinute2.

TA ceased responding to memo.

GG: You're a horrible liar!

GG: I can't wait to see those tear stained faces.

[gho2ty]

💬

youre.. 2ad. and obliiviiou2. and iit remiind2 me of how ii wa2 when ii fiir2t got on here. youre ju2t a dumba22 flat out and dont know how thiing2 work. iit take2 a few triie2 two actually 2liightly know the do2 and dont2 for relatiion2hiip2 and even now iim not great at iit but iive iimproved and you need two iimprove a2 well becau2e frankly iit2 obviiou2 you ju2t are iin a con2tant 2tate of fumbliing around. and iim not ju2t talkiing quad2- ii mean friiend2hiip2 two.

you have a lot two learn and on one hand iit hurt2 two 2ee and ii2 annoyiing but on another ii know ii wa2 once there and ii want two help guiide or at lea2t kiinda 2upport and let you know that youll fiigure 2hiit out and youre allowed a few mii2take2. actually a lot of mii2take2. and one2 iim 2ure you actiively keep makiing, whiich ii2 fiine, and ii dont thiink you know yet that iit2 fiine?

iitd be a 2hame for you two already go and end your exii2tence and not even bc you rlly want two but for 2ome hero iidealii2m 2hiit for your 2e22iion whiich alriight good for you ii hope iit work2 out ii gue22. iif you leave that fa2t all the re2t of what ii 2aiid wont even matter bc iit take2 tiime two learn and iimprove, 2o.

leave now 2uckiing or 2urviive and probably learn two better your2elf iin the whole 2ociial a2pect, your choiice. here2 two you not pulliing 2hiit that2 yknow entiirely rii2ky and iimpul2iive. thiink your 2hiit out, bud. dont rii2k leaviing wiith regret2.