#nonnie i absolutely don't know what happened but I'm choosing to believe this is how it all went down

[lemotmo]

Hello, I hope im not bothering you and that you are having a wonderful day.

I had a question and I'm sorry if you've already answered something similar in the past, I tried to look but might be further down then what I've already scrolled ^^

I know you've said you believe it is likely buddie is happening this season, but have you ever felt that way before? And if so was it as much as this season? (I've seen a lot of blogs saying they too feel like something shifted and that they are also kinda thinking it's happening but I joined last year so I have no clue if that's normal clown shoes behavior or if something really strong have shifted)

Have a wonderful day and sorry if this bothered you, I really enjoy your anon responses you're always answering with kindness and patience it's very soothing and welcoming

Lots of love, anon who would've loved to be in your GC :)

No no, not a bother Nonny. Don't worry! 😋 Thank you for the kind words and compliments. ❤️

Now, as for your question:

😂😂😂 No Nonny, absolutely not. I've always shipped Buddie with the idea that it would NEVER be canon. I mean, I saw season 4 and 5 and there were some very interesting scenes and set-ups in some of those episodes, but I never truly believed it would happen.

And then ABC took over after season 6 and the first Oliver & Ryan interviews happened. I immediately sat up. They freely talked Buddie in those interviews and I was gobsmacked. I couldn't believe it. Oliver had always said that he wouldn't talk about Buddie anymore, because he didn't want to lead us on and suddenly it was all buddie, buddie, buddie.

Then 7x04 happened and Buck was bisexual. It blew my mind. I never ever in a million years saw that coming before season 7. I mean, the signs were there, but I never had hope it would happen. Then Eddie got thrust in between BT in almost every single scene they had. I mean, talk about foreshadowing. 😋😋😋

Those Oliver interviews after the bi Buck reveal where he -once again- talked about being 'all for Buddie happening if the story was right'.

The continuous Ryan promotion during the hiatus between 7 and 8. The Ryan interviews and how Eddie is going on a road to discover himself.

Nonny, I could go on and on and on. We have never ever been THIS close to Buddie before. So yeah, I choose to believe it's happening. More than that: I'm almost certain it's happening. 🤷‍♀️

I honestly think there is no way back from this without a giant backlash happening. The show is very well aware of this. They have to realise that this storyline could break the internet... in a good way. 😂

Could I be wrong? Possibly yeah. But then there are a ton of people 'wrong' with me, because so many people in this fandom have seen and felt the shift, even the journalists.

We'll just have to wait and see who will turn out to be right and who will turn out to be wrong I guess. 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️

Have a great day!

[dangerpronebuddie]

considering that they said they dont wanna make a guy queer and then have him crush on his best friend immediately (cause cliches or whatever) i think eddie is going to be the one to take The Step which makes buddie canon. do you have any ideas or wishes as to what he could do or what could happen?

Sorry, Nonnie, this got long 😁

I'm still a big believer in the fact Buck needs to make the first move, and I could go on for ages about that, but I'm willing to entertain the possibility of it going the other way, or at least that both of them make a move. I think the remark about not wanting him to immediately crush on his best friend is a little misleading (and they can't be any other way, honestly). We've seen how Buck acts with Eddie, he's head over heels even if he doesn't know it yet. He needed to have that realization outside of Eddie, because he needs to ultimately choose Eddie.

I think that, if Eddie were to make the first move, there would need to be some kind of explicit feelings realization on Buck's part. With Buck's history, including with his latest relationship, he was guided towards it. The thought of calling Tommy after that date didn't cross his mind until Eddie told him he should. Buck does exactly as Bobby says in s5. He goes with the flow, landing in relationships with no idea how he got there and no clue what to do when things go south.

If Eddie were to make the first move, Buck would need to be sure of his feelings, cliche or no, because if he wasn't, there would always be that little sliver of doubt that he's with Eddie simply because Eddie wants it. And Eddie knows it too. He wouldn't make the first move unless he knew for sure how Buck felt.

I think they're probably going to reach the realization at the same time, or pretty close to one another though. Buck is already explicitly crazy about Eddie (*flails a hand at 7x04), but he didn't know he was queer until Tommy kissed him. He needed to see that men were an option before he could consider Eddie as an option. Eddie, however, needs to see Buck as an option. I operate under the idea that Eddie fell first, and has at least some awareness of his feelings, but has resigned himself to a life of pining. He knows that if he tells Buck and he doesn't have absolute certain confirmation of Buck's feelings, that Buck will make it happen for Eddie even if he doesn't feel the same. And since Buck told him he can't stop thinking about Tommy (despite his main concern being he lied to Eddie, but that's beside the point here (I have Thoughts™ about the coming out scene lol)), Eddie has once again pushed away how he feels. He now thinks that Buck won't love him instead of can't. It's not impossible, but it is improbable to him.

But, if Eddie were to somehow hear (by accidentally eavesdropping on Buck admitting his feelings to someone for example), there's a chance it would give Eddie the courage to make a move. But it needs to be a slap in the face kind of declaration. There can't be any doubt. Not "I think I'm in love with Eddie," but "I'm in love with Eddie."

And there's this debate going around about who would be the one to initiate their first kiss. If Buck were to confess first, I'm easy either way on who kisses first. (Because it's them, I see it being mutual more often than not, which I could also gab about some other time). But if Eddie were to confess first, Buck initiating their first kiss would make the most sense because it would still be him choosing them. Eddie could lay his cards on the table and leave it to Buck to decide what he wants.

Now that all that's out of the way, there's one or two ways it could go. Firstly though: I don't want them to get together at the loft. That place is a symbol of failed relationships. I think the best way would be if Eddie confesses and then bolts. That part could be at the loft. Say he goes all day thinking about what he overheard and decides he's just gonna bare his soul and leave the ball in Buck's court. Maybe he follows Buck to the loft or they're already there together. Either way, Eddie blurts out a confession in a moment of desperation and then leaves. Buck is completely flabbergasted by the fact Eddie loves him back, but he doesn't know what to do with it. Eddie loves him back, but he just ran from him. That would give Buck the chance to decide what he wants and whether or not he's going to go after it. He decides he does want it and goes to Eddie's. I'm a nut about the doors thing, so I see him knocking on the kitchen door again. Eddie debates not answering because he's terrified. Buck asks if Eddie will let him in and Eddie of course can't deny him anything. He opens the door, Buck asks if he can come in. We get a beautiful slow build up to a kiss, Buck asks if he can kiss Eddie maybe, and that's how we get Buck choosing them. It works with their love language because Eddie always uses words, Buck always uses actions. I'm still leaning towards Buck confessing first, but I can see how it's possible to be the other way around.

[matan4il]

hey, are you Israeli/do you speak Hebrew? what is Israeli media saying about how Netanyahu has handled relations with the US? or at least his decision to cancel the DC trip after the UN vote?

Hi Nonnie!

I am, and I do. But I'm not sure how well I can reply to you. You know that joke about how, if you ask 2 Jews about something, you'll get at least 3 opinions? Yeah, so imagine the range of opinions, many of them contradicting each other, in a state full of Jews. Add to that the opinions of non-Jewish Israelis, which also have a variety of view points. Now imagine the opinions expressed by those who end up working in the media, meaning the most opinionated and outspoken ones. IDK that I can condense it all into one coherent reply.

But basically, any opinion you can imagine, someone expressed it. I will say that most did seem more upset with the US, for allowing what's seen as an anti-Israeli resolution to pass at the UN unvetoed, because the harm from that is real, massive, and could affect us for years, maybe even in ways we can't yet foresee. So keeping in mind that the UN resolution is harmful to Israel, and that the US was absolutely making a political point by allowing it to pass, most understand Netanyahu's reaction in that context.

That said, even with that context in mind, there were a lot of different opinions and reactions on whether it was the right move.

Personally, I do not like Netanyahu and have never voted for him. I used to dislike him because I thought he was anti-peace. It took me time, but I realize that actually, the biggest issue with him is that more than anything else, he wants to stay in power. He doesn't actually have (IMO) an ideological spine. At the same time, I won't demonize him, either. I very much hold him to be the person responsible for a lot of terrible things that have happened to Israel, to a great degree because he chooses to believe that if something didn't go wrong so far despite him not doing anything about it, then it will continue that way and he can go on ignoring it, but I don't believe that he would actually willingly sacrifice masses of Israeli civilians just for his own sake. In other words, I do think he is guilty of neglecting many things until they get to the point where people pay with their lives (while convincing himself it won't get to that), but I don't think he's an unfeeling monster who will intentionally get people killed.

So... let's put it this way. I was not surprised he canceled the trip, and I was not surprised that he re-instated it about a week later.

The trip had to happen, because a total break in communications is against Israel's interests, and becuase Israeli and American officials sitting together in person to talk about the Rafah operation is the best way to figure out an action plan that fits both. It was therefore in Netanyahu's interest for the trip to happen, but also in his interest to take some stand, and show the White House that their UN move is very upsetting to Israelis, enough for even him not to ignore.

I hope this kind of helps! xoxox

(for all of my updates and ask replies regarding Israel, click here)

[itsjaywalkers]

Hi! I hope you’re doing well. I had a question about how you perceive Lily. I know you’ve written pandalily & bartylily (and I have loved them both!!!) and also she’s shipped with James. I’m curious if who you prefer her with or who you think she’s most compatible with? Or do you think it depends on the context/environment? I just really love how you write Lily. Usually she seems like the perfect girl and has no flaws and that’s just so boring to me. But when people give her flaws and bad judgment and conflicts, I like her so much more cuz she’s so relatable. And you’ve written her so well. So I was just wondering if you tend to ship her more with Pandora or barty or James or whoever and why. Anyways, have a great day!

hey nonnie <3 i'm okay!! i hope you're also doing good!!

i do think it depends on the context and on how you choose to portray lily. i know my version of her is not the most common one, so my answer isn't probably true to someone else's lily yk?? for example, i don't think bartylily could ever work in a canon compliant context for obvious reasons. but when you put them in a modern au there's Potential and i can see them working just fine!! there's a reason why i ship them after all

regardless, and when speaking about MY lily, i think she's the most compatible with pandora!! lily has been put on a pedestal her whole life, there's many expectations for her and a lot of pressure, and everyone assumes she's gonna end up marrying a good man and creating a family. and there's absolutely nothing wrong with that!! but i feel like it's more interesting to explore what would happen if, deep down, she didn't want any of this. she's written as a Saint, a Mother even before she was born. she barely feels human, or real, and she doesn't seem to have a single flaw, apart from having a bit of a temper (and it isn't even painted as a flaw anyway). i want something different for her, because that's what makes her compelling as a character to me. pandora is someone i see as volatile, morally grey and who doesn't really care about what others think or have to say about her. she focuses on self-preservation. she's incredibly smart and shares that hunger for knowledge lily also has, but she approaches learning in a vastly different way. i say this all the time: they bring the worst out in each other. but i believe that's what lily truly needs, and what's bound to make her the happiest. she needs someone who will not only see her as real, and human, and messy, and the ordinary girl she actually is, but who will also encourage and support her darker side, her ambition, push her to embrace her ugliest parts. someone who doesn't expect anything from her

besides, there's a lot of potential for angst in a canon context, which i love too, bc lily is always going to choose to Fight, especially considering her kind are the ones being actually threatened. and pandora is always gonna choose to survive, what suits her best, even if that means staying neutral and going into hiding

i do think she's compatible with james too, despite my general dislike of jily. BUT i can't see them working in the long term

and i fucking adore her with barty as u all already know, i just enjoy pandalily a bit more (usually, at least, bc bartylily have been taking over my life lately lol)

also, thank you darling!! u loving my lily this much is such a huge compliment <3 she's my fav character alongside james, so i adoreeee writing her and talking about her and just !! seeing her act messy and make mistakes and be angry !!

i hope you have an amazing day too <333

[fortpeat]

Hello, I happened to see that "discord situation" ask you received yesterday and I debated whether to send this or not from my POV

I want to tell you that I am one of the members who was kicked out of the server all because I shared an opinion. An opinion which was mainly pointing out an error in the server owner's way of speaking.

I don't know what I did wrong, I merely pointed out that error based on my learnings and rather than taking constructive criticism I was deemed as an enemy.

All I ask is how is it that a leader can act this way when they are supposed to be the role models for a server they are leading.? When the members of the server are supposed to look up to this leader as a role model on how to treat others within the server.

I was truly disappointed with the way it was handled, I was glad to be kicked out. You see this was my very first server and the experience was awful. From the way you replied to the previous ask makes me believe that my story would also be put out there and I trust you with this.

Maybe you are right about the server having other good members but in my eyes as long as they are a part of that server they too are associated with such behavior. Maybe they are good people and maybe they didn't know what was happening but I am hoping these messages will make them leave that server so as not to ever be clubbed with that single person.

I don't know if I ever want to be a part of any server, maybe sometime in the future hopefully. Also I'm glad that the other member stood up for themselves and was courageous enough to make people aware of such an awful place. Nobody deserves to go through what any of us did and I hope people who are still a part of that server can remove themselves from such a toxic place.

Thank you.

Hey Nonnie ✨☺️

Oh boy I can't believe this is the second anon I am getting regarding this situation 🥺. And I don't even know where to begin in the first place. 🫣

I am so sorry you went through that. I can say that the way you talked about the error must have been super professional especially with the way you compose your message. 🥺

I wish I had a valid reason as to state why they are the way they are but all I have is that, some people are just like that. They deem everyone beneath them and have such a superiority complex, it's practically impossible for anyone to correct them about anything.

You are absolutely right. Server moderators are the one who leads the server and it's through them the members learn what to do and not to do. But I suppose here the power of leadership got into their head and they think they are above such criticisms.

My experience with that person has been through private conversations and like I said I don't want to dish it out since it was in the past and it took me a while to move on and get better. I had people around me helping me see that it wasn't my fault in the first place and I hope you see that too. And thank you for trusting me with your story.

I can't make choices for other members of that server and it is their choice at the end of the day whether they want to stay or not. I hope whatever they choose they are careful over there. Like I said nobody deserves to have their opinions disrespected or their "voice" be cut off just coz they don't align with other people.

I hope one day you choose to join a fandom. There are lots of wonderful people I am sorry your first experience has been tainted like this 🥺🫂

Here is some Fortpeat being cuties for you 🥰💗

[abysskeeper]

Thing is a two year time skips means once again Oscar gets development off screen that we don’t get to see. The reason why others see him as not important is that exact thing, we don’t get to see him, not as much as everyone else.

“He’s not suppose to be the focus” is what I’ve seen fans say. Yeah okay but he still deserves at least some? And having a two year time skip just feel like a lazy way to develop Oscar without showing that development.

Sometimes I feel like that’s the reason why Oscar has little to no merch and why everyone else does. It’s cuz the writes don’t wanna be bothered with giving Oscar some screen time that’s not then overshadowed with everyone else and don’t see him important.

For me a two year time skip would only further that.

Hi Nonny! Let me start by saying...trust me, I totally get it. I'm the gal who condemned herself to (albeit very slowly) writing fanfic for the rest of the show's run because I heard "Her name...is Jinn" and went "Hm, let's examine how we got here" and never looked back. I've written my fair share of "missing canon" scenes because hey, if the writers won't do it for my boy, and fans want to ignore him, then it's free real estate.

I'll shove the rest under a read more because I got a little long winded.

I also want to clarify that just because I may or may not want to see that dynamic of years having passed (I do), I absolutely do not expect it to happen. Me wanting years before they return is basically my writer brain going "Imagine the angst!" and taking off with an idea. Especially the emotional Rosegarden potential on Oscar's end.

Logistically though, years doesn't make sense and I know it. We know Salem is launching her endgame and holding her off for that long seems improbable. It isn't impossible but...it is unlikely.

And it really doesn't make sense for the meta either. All of volume 9 was about Ruby coming to terms with the fact she is enough and she did her best, and a lot of the preceding questioning that led to her doubting herself was regarding the message sent to the rest of the world in volume 8. That end shot with RWBY+J finally reaching Vacuo and seeing all of the kingdoms there defending it is meant to show a direct result of that message and be a real world affirmation that Ruby is enough. She did enough, the message got out, the world responded to her. Having it be years since their fall into the Ever After negates that point, because suddenly the other kingdoms are there defending Vacuo because they have to with the war against Salem inevitably ramping up during that time. I don't think the writers are going for that.

That said however, I do hope (and believe) it will be a few months. Maybe upwards of 6 if they're feeling ballsy. Anything less than a month, to me, would sort of have the inverse effect of what you're rightly pointing out here. Volumes 7 and 8 were just as much a show at Ruby's character regression as they were for Ren, Nora, and Oscar's character progressions. Ren and Nora didn't need the Ever After because they came to those realizations about themselves on their own terms through volume 7, and then definitely into volume 8. They weren't complete developments of course, they were steps of progress, but I don't expect Ruby or Jaune to be at their end stages either.

And, I don't know, maybe I misread it, but Oscar had major plot and character movement in volume 8, and it just screamed at me that it was all about his immense potential and capability to step in as a leader himself. Not as Oz (Salem's denial of him being Oz is direct proof of that) but as Oscar himself (choosing to play the game and turn some of Salem's people; choosing to trust Hazel; and most importantly, not giving up on those plans as Oz advised him to do). I think bringing RWBY+J (especially team leaders Ruby and Jaune, the two he has looked up to and relied on the most) back too soon to Vacuo would rob him of that opportunity to be in a role he is clearly meant to take and that it would do a disservice to the developments he did make in volume 8.

And that would be...the first time actually...where I don't think I would mind not seeing all of that development happen on screen for Oscar? In part because we already saw the starting stages of it in volume 8, and in part because there is something to be said about exploring character development after it's happened already. If done well (and I do continue to have faith in CRWBY, a rare sentiment I know), it can be a lot of fun. I don't need to see the moment where Oscar decides to step up and help people when all evidence and his prior actions point to him making that decision without hesitation. What I do want to see is what comes after it, how he handles taking on that mantle and how he handles all of the struggles that come with it (not to mention mourning losing 5 of his friends in one go...based on a plan he helped create); and you need time for all that to set in. Maybe years is too long...but months is not.

And this is all without considering the Merge because I do not believe the Merge will happen (even though I wrote fic for that too), and even if it does...it won't happen the way FNDM anticipates (the way FNDM anticipates goes directly against what we saw Jinn portray). Overall though, I don't really bother myself with what fans say...mostly because I like to retain my sanity. I know we've had issues with it in the past (the fact we didn't get a single scene in v6 after he went "missing" still haunts me), but volumes 7-8 really seemed to be setting up and showing that the writers view Oscar as a main character. His brief "appearance" in volume 9, if you will, I think only further solidified that point. So I'm not overly concerned with CRWBY not giving him screen time, I'm just hoping that screen time is an accurate representation and continuation of what we saw in volume 8.

Tl;dr I don't disagree with you, Nonny, and I don't actually think we're getting a time skip of years (but it does make writer brain go brrrr). That said, having no time pass at all I think would be just as big of a disservice to team Vacuo, and especially to Oscar. There's a middle there that I'm putting faith in CRWBY threading the needle of.

And, oh yeah. Give us more Oscar merch. I do just...wholeheartedly agree there.

[one-abuse-survivor]

How do I tell the difference between my parents being abusive and them just fucking it up? I don't want to overdramatize my issues but I feel like I COULD, like maybe it is what my mom says, and they just fuck up sometimes and I just don't understand what its like to be a parent. But I do understand what its like to be their kid and it fucking sucks but I don't know if it sucks enough to pass into abuse territory. How would I tell? Are there like, books I could read on it or something? - Z

Hi, nonnie ❤️

I haven't read any books that talk about this issue in particular, but I have talked about this in therapy, and I can tell you what I know. And what I know is that there is no "difference". Abusive behaviours don't stop being abusive just because they were fuck-ups on the abuser's part.

Truth is, the majority of abusers out there aren't heartless monsters who thrive on torturing others. Most abusers are regular people, capable of good, who also happen to have harmful behaviours. But, because they see those behaviours as them genuinely messing up and not as intentional or malicious, they feel they shouldn't be held accountable, because obviously they didn't mean any harm. They were just having a bad day, or expressing their own emotions, or trying their best with the limited tools they had. Or maybe they were just very tired and stressed. Ultimately, they were being human, and therefore (in their minds) any colateral damage they might have caused is justified.

I know multiple people whose abusive parents have claimed "yes, we mess up sometimes, but you have no idea how hard it is to be a parent" when confronted about the harm they caused. It's not an uncommon thing for abusers to say, and for abusers to truly believe.

And, right, being a parent is probably incredibly difficult. I'm not one, so I can't speak from experience. And it's true that no parent is absolutely perfect and they all make mistakes. But if your kid tells you something you did hurt them, you can always choose to listen, to apologise, and to care about your kid's feelings. You can always try to be a bit better today than you were yesterday, and this kind of situation can even help you grow closer to your kid.

If, instead, you decide that your kid's negative emotions toward yourself are accusatory and unfair and manipulative... You're not just denying the hurt you've already caused, but also actively causing more hurt and building a foundation for even more hurt to be caused moving forward.

Nonnie, it may be true you don't know what it's like to be a parent. But as you said, you do know what it's like to be their kid and it fucking sucks. You're getting hurt, and that's what matters—not their intentions. And just from the information you gave in this ask about their reaction to you expressing your hurt, the red flags of abuse are absolutely there. I would even go as far as to say that denying your emotions like this and framing them as accusatory, manipulative, and exaggerated is a form of emotional abuse, in and of itself.

Maybe some of my followers have book recs to help you navigate this. You can also go through some of the posts in the masterlist linked in my bio that might help you identify some of your parents' behaviours as things like emotional abuse, victim-blaming, gaslighting, etc. And you're always free to send more asks if you need more help navigating this.

Sending a big virtual hug ❤️

[katsukikitten]

Tell us how you’d be caustic to each other 👀

Aight Nonny 👀 you got it.

We'll start with Katsuki. Both of us have screaming matches sometimes, yelling at each other and nitpicking over the smallest fucking thing because we are both too prideful or independent or stupid to be able to express or take the time to analyze our feelings so we sometimes take it out on each other. Even times with physical altercations when out tempers get absolutely out of control. Each match ending in the infamous line of "Then fucking break up with me." Katsuki would then push me up against a wall and make out with me, hoping sex will fix the issue and angry sex normally does but it's not a long term fix. And maybe one day we both let slip, just to hurt the other or so caught up in our rage that it's true even for the fleeting moment "I don't love you anymore." Eventually Katsuki believes it doesn't go the route of angry sex. He'll start packing his shit and I won't say anything. Just sit on the couch and emotionally pull away. Thinking I'll be so fucking happy when the house is quiet and he's gone, sleeping on Kirishima's couch and he'd done it before, he'd wait til we both cool down before he comes home. He'd open the door and we both apologize the second we see each other.

But something is different about it this time, this time there is a finality to it and when he slams the door shut, the pictures of us rattling in their frames, I do what I always do and push it away until I can't stand to even sit with myself anymore.

Izuku would just take the rage and anger, just like he did growing up with Kaachan, the rage he can handle but the depression, well he doesn't know what the fuck to do. Izuku has tried everything, helping me find an outlet, exercise, taking me to appointments I always cancel. Literally trying to help me as best he can but you really can't save someone from their mental illness and it's a little difficult for him to wrap his head around some days. And soon he'll get tired of battling something he can never win, he'll place the blame on himself, he isn't good enough, can't make me happy enough, I deserve someone who can actually be my hero. He will slowly pull away and I'll notice, oh I'll notice and I'll pretend it doesn't hurt because it happens eventually with everyone anyway. I try to show less symptoms around him, to be more normal but it doesn't fix it and eventually we turn into strangers who happen to be roommates. He'll break up with me, he'll be gentle and he'll have even called some of my friends to show up after he leaves. He'll leave me the stuff he bought because I like it or still use it, he'll have paid everything for the rest of the lease and he'll reassure me that it was him and not me when I know damn well it was me.

Nagi would continue to choose video games over me and I would turn off the internet for attention and if he had a work around to that I'd cut the power cords to his shit. Eventually soccer will take over as a priority, I'll lie and say I'm fine with that until one day I just stop showing up to his matches all together, he's stopped looking for me in the crowd three games ago and to be honest he doesn't notice until someone else points out that I haven't been there for half the season.

Hakuji 😔 I would push this man away so many times. String him along if we weren't dating because I'd be so selfish with him, I don't want him to be with anyone else but I know I'm not the best match for him. That he deserves better and that someone else would really eat up his princess treatment that he gives his s/o. Eventually I'd just ghost him and it'd take him a minute to decide to let go and when I see him with a pretty girl that doesn't look anything like me or act anything like me, I'd be bitter as hell. She'd be soft and kind, gentle and the epitome of feminity and I'd myself that I was right, that I was never his type in the first place.

[nebulein]

The cat already changed his insta header to the senators 😭😭

"Shit." It just occurred to him.

"What," Dylan asks, stretched out on the couch next to him, not looking up from his doomscrolling on Twitter. At least some things never change.

Alex bites his lip. "I'm gonna have to do an Insta post, won't I?"

"Oh, yeah." Dylan looks irritatingly unbothered by the revelation. Alex kicks his ankle. At least that gets Dylan to look at him, even if he's making an outraged 'what was that for' face.

"I don't even know what to say!"

Sure, there'd been rumors for months, but it's the NHL. When weren't there rumors. Alex had somehow, stupidly, foolishly, always thought he'd be a part of whatever rebuild would be happening. Well. Looks like Kyle had had other plans. Maybe Alex should've put more stock in the increasingly pinched looks Jonny had been wearing after every meeting with the FO, but it's a moot point now.

"Oh, pssh, that's easy. I basically had a draft sitting ready in my notes since forever," Dylan waves him off, face already buried in his Twitter timeline again. "I wanna thank the team and the fans for an amazing time in Chicago," he drones on, voice entirely flat like he's reading this out, except Alex can see that all Dylan's got open right now is a video of Noodle. Apparently it's a super bones day. "And then you go on, like, super excited to come play in," Dylan frowns, faltering.

"Ottawa," Alex supplies.

"Ottawa," Dylan repeats, like it's the first time he's heard it, like Alex hasn't been freaking out about this trade for the last hour and a half.

"How's your own talks going?" Alex asks more to keep Dylan talking than anything. He still doesn't know how to feel about this damn trade. "And send me that draft, will ya?"

"Yeah, sure." Dylan nods absently, chewing on the drawstring of his hoodie, tapping away on his phone before throwing it to the side with a huff, finally looking at Alex. "You know how talks are going, man, there are no talks."

It used to make Alex' heart sink. Now, though, it's maybe not so bad. Alex won't be in Chicago anymore anyways, there's really no reason for Dylan to stay here any longer, either. Not when the Hawks never could see what they had in Dylan.

Alex's phone buzzes with a text. He pulls up the notes app, copies over what Dylan has sent him and starts editing to make it sound like himself. It's a good starting point. Alex very carefully doesn't think about what it means that Dylan has had this draft on his phone since who knows how long, ready to whip it out whenever. All it's missing is the new team name. He deletes the XXXs, fills it in with 'Senators' instead.

Dylan's an RFA, but with the Hawks not even offer sheeting him he's basically free to sign wherever.

"What does Morris say?"

Dylan sighs. "That we'll talk next week. But he asked if I had any, like, destinations in mind."

Dylan makes a face. Alex hums in agreement. He doesn't want to move, either. The mere idea of having to pack up this whole house, with Archie and Burt and Ralph, and move it all to a whole different country... it's a lot.

Still. Ottawa isn't the worst place in the world. And then Alex has an idea. It doesn't take him long to find it, there's always someone quick to do those jersey swaps and Alex only feels a little bad swiping the picture without asking. This is more important though.

By the time he's done he's got a post on Instagram thanking the Hawks for five wonderful years, likes count already going up as Alex watches, and a shiny new Insta bio and profile pic. At least this way Dylan will hopefully remember who Alex plays for now.

"How do you feel about moving to Canada?"

[awesomefringey]

I may be naive but I do not see why everyone is so upset with Liam. Sure, everyone has the right to their opinion, but I also think that many choose to misinterpret what he says.

To me it sounds more like Liam is trying to defend Zayn. Maybe he should have chosen his words a bit more carefully but I don’t think he goes into detail regarding Zayn's childhood. He rather contributes with perspectives on why different people have different behaviors. And he is trying to give people a reason to forgive or understand Zayn. Even if that’s not Liams place, I do not think he did it out of spite. 

He says he doesn’t agree with everything that Zayn has done, but he will still always be there for him. I think that is completely reasonable. If my friends act wrongly, I do not have to accept it just because they are my friends. I will, however, accept the human factor, that we make mistakes. I definitely do not always do things that I am proud of and I do not want my friends to accept bad behavior from me. But I want them to believe in my ability to reflect and change and to support me on that journey. 

I think a lot of people think that Liam badmouthed Zayn just because he hinted at the accusations against him. But we do not need to continue to normalize a culture of silence around vi*lence. Regardless of what is true or not in the accusations against Zayn, one is allowed to say that a vi*lent or threatening behavior is not okay. That doesn’t mean we think that Zayn is a bad person.

Like I said maybe I’m naive or maybe I just misunderstood the whole thing. I know Liam said a bunch of other stuff too but this message is already long enough. I'm just upset about how mean people are.

Ok nonnie, there’s a lot to unpack here.

I’ve watched the entire podcast myself and I’m of course open to the idea that I’ve misunderstood what Liam said. But I’m not actively choosing so nor am I oblivious to the fact that my perceptions will always be impacted by my experiences and triggers. Thus all of us having different interpretations, but that doesn't mean it's malice. In this case the majority felt Liam shouldn't have said what he said about Zayn (and a lot of other things). Also Zayn's cousin was angry about it which leads me to believe that if Liam was misunderstood, he was also misunderstood by Zayn.

To me, Liam used Zayn's weakest moment (unsolicited! on a podcast!) to brag about his intimate knowledge of Zayn's background, turning it into a display of his empathy and implying he's been offering help over and over again (as if it wasn't Liam's mental health that's constantly being questioned in his fanbase but here we are now).

I don't see bad intend or spite. I even think this wasn't about Zayn as a person, at all. Zayn was just a vehicle for Liam to tell a story about himself. And while that's absolutely fair to do so, Liam did proactively choose a very very sensitive topic out of Zayn's life, to impulsively mock Zayn at first to then backtrack in a weird way of making sure we knew yes, Liam thought Zayn's indeed a d*ck, but also Liam is so understanding and super compassionate about it because he knows there are reasons. And that has nothing to do with speaking up against violence or calling out a friend. It's invasive and it's framing a narrative when Zayn himself asked for privacy to protect his family and his daughter.

What you describe and experience within your friendships is wonderful yet it's something that happens with a sense of privacy. You would feel different if your friends used your lowest moment - that was possibly misconstrued in the press and you had chosen not to fight and set the record straight in favour of finding peace - in an interview and reminding the world that it happened while you've probably long made amends in the meantime and are already in a better place...

Don't judge your perception as naive or other's as choosing a false interpretation. All is valid. We can always agree to disagree. And I can tell you're coming from a place of love for Liam there, and it's totally fair to point out how you feel about Liam's intentions.

PS: What a timing, Liam just tries to amend things there himself.

[lemotmo]

I feel like something has to have happened behind the scenes. I don't know if it has anything to do with anyone being told specific story arcs, because I have no idea how 911 does those things in the off-season so I don't want to assume any of the actors have been told anything. The radio silence from Oliver is not abnormal or unexpected this is kind of his routine. I feel like the interviews that came out with Ryan immediately following the season finale you could tell he was not thrilled with the storyline. He's had time to rest, reflect and maybe been given some ideas about the upcoming season and this interview came across much more positive. I do think he was comfortable with the interviewer as well, which is always noticeable with Oliver and Ryan.

The absolute radio silence from Lou across the board is the big mystery here. First he completely shuttered his cameo account. He went from multiple daily posts about 911 and Tommy to absolutely nothing. He's no longer liking posts. He's no longer replying to Twitter messages. Absolute silence. I know some people are saying it's because he was 'attacked' and is just taking a break but I don't buy that at all. You don't go from being a complete attention seeker to dormant because a few people called you out on Twitter. Now you have his goon squad talking about how they're being blocked by people who work on the show, and the jounos who cover the show have started publicly calling them out, which they've never done before (as far as I can remember?) to Tim flat out saying it was a mistake to have ever engaged in the first place even out of politeness.

I don't know but it's weird how sudden it was. I saw one post on Twitter this morning where one of his fans (gag me) said they were getting a little concerned because not only did the BTS videos show a clear separation between him and Oliver when they're not rolling but now Kenny, who I guess was the one cast member who 'liked' Lou's posts had stopped doing that shortly before Lou went dark. Ryan pretty much debunking all their nonsense in one interview didn't help their cause either. I don't know, this got rambly but it's noticable and it's odd so I'm very curious what happened.

Hey Nonny. I must admit that I'm a bit hesitant to post your message on my blog. Mostly because I always try to stay respectful towards people. But I really wanted to reply to this, so I decided to go for it.

For anyone coming across this: Me replying to this message is not an invite to send hatred my way. I myself am not hating on anything or anyone. I simply want to give my input and opinion on this message that was sent to me, since it's an interesting topic. Remember, every opinion is valid and it's okay to post about your opinion on your own blog.

Ryan did seem so much happier doing this interview. You could see that he wasn't struggling to look for answers that were 'acceptible'. So yeah, I do think something shifted bts. I can't know for sure, but to me it seems that he got a YES for the storyline he has been wanting to do for a couple of seasons now. So yeah, I choose to believe that this is about queer Eddie's journey.

As for Lou. I have no idea what happened there. It's possible the showrunners talked to him about the cameos or his recent behaviour on social media. I don't know and I also don't want to spend too much of my precious time speculating about a man I really don't like. Ultimately I don't think it matters. I don't see him lasting very long in season 8.

Basically the truth is that we don't know for sure what is going on. He could just be on a vacation for all we know. I think the guy earned enough cameo money over the last couple of months to afford a trip to the Maledives. :D

As for all the other stuff... again, I don't know. Did it seem like he didn't get along with the rest of the cast? Yes. Is it true that Ryan talked about a lot of subjects that were used against him by certain people in the fandom? Yes.

Are some of the BT fans really 'passionate' about the ship and do some questionable things because of that? Yes. But please keep in mind that not everyone is like that. I know some perfectly reasonable fans that just like the BT ship dynamic. I might not understand it, but it's their take and it's valid. We need to keep them in mind as well when we speak about the BT fandom. It doesn't do any good to lump everyone together in one big general heap of shippers. Everyone is different. It's the same in the Buddie fandom.

So, look... am I curious about what is going on bts? Hell yes. But mostly in function of how they are planning Eddie's coming out and the eventual Buddie of it all. The rest is really not that important anymore.

All we can do now is focus on the things we do know: the possibility of queer Eddie Diaz in season 8? BIG HUGE YES!

[trashlie]

I want to share a thought on Alyssa's betrayal. I was wondering what story she and those other girls gave after ShinAe's fall. Best scenario, Alyssa told the truth that ShinAe was a friend she accidentally hurt and she was in the wrong. Worst scenario, peer pressure and overwhelming guilt made Alyssa throw ShinAe under the bus. She told them the rumors about ShinAe's violent behavior and how she thought she was going to hurt her. Although that might be what she truly believed in that moment. 1/?

Would Alyssa insist all her actions are justified when she has yet to confront her malleable nature? I also wondered if she was influenced a negative view of Nol for his "troubled" past, Kousuke said he subtly warned people away from him and of course Yui could say just enough to cause a bit of friction between them. It doesn't help that he's going to jail for assault. Maybe that's why Alyssa thought he was getting riled up when he was defending her at the park (also the latest fp ep). 2/?

I loved reading your post on how Nol would empathize with Alyssa's guilt over ShinAe's fall. How do you think he would feel if he learned Alyssa viewed ShinAe as dangerous based on those types of rumors? It's similar to his own classmates' gossip. Do asks still have a character limit???? I'm sorry to bombard you with multiple asks otherwise I feel like tumblr would eat it 3/3

Ahhhh, Nonny I love this ask, thank you so much for sending it in because I've been thinking about it a lot today!

As usual, VERY LONG ridiculously long post under the read more. Please note because I'm writing this about Alyssa I'm trying to be biased in her favor in how this is written, if that makes sense? As readers, it's easy to hate her for her wishy washiness and the way she's hurt Nol and Shinae and because in general people do not like spineless women. I do find some aspects of Alyssa to be interesting, which I'd love to get to in another post. I don't think she's, you know, a character whose moral compass guides her so much as a character whose moral compass is given no room in her current circumstances to guide her, if that makes sense. She has a lot of growing to do and a lot of choices to make. But I tried to write this with the understanding that, like Kousuke, Alyssa is the product of her environment and has been heavily sheltered and carries a complex about being liked, and that heavily affects the way she treats people. It doesn't justify her actions, but it's always good to remember.

I should really write about her some more later lmao she's so interesting because she's kind of a mess lmao. Anyway!

Alyssa is honestly such a wildcard at this point that it's really hard to tell what she's been thinking or what she knows or what her ulterior motives are (if she has them) since so much has been withheld from us yet, and I know a lot of fandom hates her because she doesn't have a very good reputation, but I think ultimately, at this point, Alyssa is a pretty good person caught in some really uncomfortable situations. I know people can argue "she's not really good if she acts like this" but I think there's a difference between a spineless person and someone who is actively choosing harm. I'm not denying that Alyssa has hurt people and continues to inflict hurt. That's not what I'm talking about - because if that was the case then boy do we have some conversations to have about Nol. But when I say I believe Alyssa is nice, I mean I believe that deep down she doesn't enjoy these situations but due to circumstances (her career, her family, Yui's power over her, her general avoidance of confrontations and people pleasing instincts, what she wants in life) she is "helpless" to do anything about them. Again, yes, she could stand up to people, but doing that risks losing things, and that's what I'm trying to get at.

I'm absolutely willing to believe the worst case scenario - or even that her friends said their "account" of what happened and Alyssa, in a state of shock and guilt, probably went along with it. I don't think she reacted in a way that suggested she thought Shinae would hurt her, as much as a derisive don't touch me, but regardless, I wouldn't be surprised if Alyssa had believed the rumors about Shinae, because realistically, Alyssa didn't have a lot of grounds to believe otherwise. They barely knew each other and moreover, Alyssa lacked the interpersonal skills to know otherwise. She just wanted to fit into something and her own parents were saying they thought Shinae was a bad influence.

The thing is, had Alyssa not caused an accident that caused Shinae substantial harm, this would be a one off thing that wouldn't matter, because middle schoolers make and lose friends all the time and Alyssa listening to more popular kids (and her parents' influence, we can't forget that) is a perfectly normal, if not bratty, thing to do. Middle school is hell lol. But because Alyssa caused an accident that has caused Shinae unresolved trauma, we view that experience differently.

I'm going to go out on a limb here and assume that Alyssa WAS very shocked and guilt-wracked and that it was probably difficult for her to answer for what happened, but also knowing she is a pro at deflecting, I can imagine it may have been difficult for her to give a straight answer. I really can't imagine she admitted that yes she pushed Shinae but she didn't mean to that she didn't want this to happen. (And if her parents were at all involved in the questioning, there's plenty of room to provoke, say things like "did she do anything to make you push her" blah blah blah.)

Would Alyssa insist all her actions are justified when she has yet to confront her malleable nature?

I love this question in particular because that's the thing - it's hard for us to say, right? If Alyssa IS at heart a nice person who is caught up in her experiences and situations, I'd think at some point the guilt would outweigh the justification - that deep down, no matter what lies she tells herself, she would ultimately have to confront her own behavior and the things she's done or accepted. Seeing Shinae at the formal, Alyssa certainly acted on what seems to be guilt and fear - she's never really contended with this part of her past and she's hidden it from Nol, because she's afraid of what he'll think of her when he finds out. To me, this means Alyssa is, on some level, ashamed - because she hurt someone and she feels guilt about it, and it doesn't suit her good girl image. I said it before, but I don't think Alyssa ever got therapy for causing that accident, but just as much as Shinae needs it, so does Alyssa. She literally could have killed Shinae, even though that wasn't her intention, even though I don't think she intended any harm to her. I think that's a really heavy experience to deal with! And all that guilt and possible horror was shoved away where it was never properly dealt with.

But what's really good about this question is that I think Alyssa sits in the middle of two options. She can listen to her heart and start denying that her behavior can be justified. But, like with Kousuke and his accountability, that means Alyssa will have to take accountability for her actions, and that's what will tell us what kind of person Alyssa is - or wants to be. What does she favor and covet the most: is it to be loved and idolized by all, to be powerful and influential, to be someone others look up to; or is it to be free of other peoples' opinions, free to be herself, free to make the friends she wants, free to live the life she wants.

Certainly I think at this point she believes her actions are justified ("we were just kids", "i never meant to hurt her", "Yeonggi is using me for his sake, too", "our relationship was never that serious", "these people are important to my career I have to schmooze with them if i want to get anywhere", "everything will work out when i have more power i'll be free of everyone") but I think it may be that she's forcing herself to believe it, because every time we've seen Alyssa faced with the effects of her behavior, the way she has hurt people, she grows upset and deflects. If she truly saw nothing wrong with how she treats people, I think she'd handle it with more confidence, unbothered. Kousuke does thigs that hurt people all the time, but he adamantly believes that it's the right thing and is unflummoxed when people tell him he's hurt them (and the few times we do see him bothered tend to involve Nol and I think we know that whether he acknowledges it, he's been in the wrong). Alyssa doesn't match that confidence, though, which leads me to believe she knows it's wrong and she probably even feels guilty about it - but she wants to believe that it's all worth it because if it's not, it means she's done awful things and hurt good people for no reason. And how do you contend with that?

And that's why I think at her core she has a good heart but she is navigating it poorly. It doesn't mean she's BEING good, but sometimes good people get caught up in situations the struggle to navigate. Alyssa wants to be loved and be influential and powerful (we think). She's been at the mercy of her family her entire life, the baby of the family, and given that Meg is the "disappointment" there's even more pressure riding on Alyssa's shoulders to do well. Her family is of a certain pedigree - we even saw this in how Meg regarded Shinae (and though she was speaking out of jealousy, it surely still came from some kind of truth). Her family may be well off but they are nothing like Hirahara rich - but they want to mingle. Alyssa has been afforded the opportunity to run with a crowd she wouldn't easily have been able to before, to meet people who are powerful (journalists/reporters, magazine and newspaper editors, CEOs, etc etc) all who could be advantageous to form an acquaintance with. And there's no doubt that she's been pushed by her family to pursue this - whether through Nol or not [eyes].

Does she even want to be an idol or is this a step towards what she really wants? Is it something she's just going with because it aligns with what she wants and she just deeply craves the feeling of being loved by all these strangers? Nol and co once remarked that Alyssa never really seemed like she was a person who wanted fame/to be an idol, and I'm dying to know how it happened. Was it just that Yui once remarked how pretty Alyssa is and wouldn't she make such a wonderful idol and planted a seed (or maybe a shackle, depending on how the case really is).

Does Alyssa want to be part of a power couple because she believes that only then will she have the freedom she really wants, the power and influence her parents have pushed her towards? If this is what she truly believes she needs to go after (not even if it's what she wants but rather if it's what she believes she must do), then she will eventually believe sincerely that her actions are justified - but if she goes in that direction then it's a safe bet that she's chosen her side.

I have absolutely veered off topic lol but I digress, please bear with me! I wasn't kidding when I said I had a lot of thoughts about her lately.

Now I DO think she's been influenced, and I'm tickled that you contemplated if Kousuke has "warned" her because I do still think there's a lot more up with them than we've yet seen. Don't think I've forgotten how long it took him to call her when he was searching for Nol, or how he acts around her. I don't know what I make of it, but I would not be surprised if Kousuke hadn't made some kind of hint once, because that's just the kind of person Kousuke is, isn't it? After all, he truly believes his account of things. I also DO think it's also VERY likely for Yui to have made some kind of comment, some kind of backhanded compliment that sounds completely harmless but is enough to plant a seed of wonder in Alyssa's head. I cannot write characters like Yui to save my life but something along the lines of how nicely he cleans up and he almost doesn't resemble his past self and who would have thought such an aggressive boy could be so decent or something that would be JUST enough to make her wonder. Also, given that the "violent" altercation of the past made news, maybe it's a story that Alyssa's parents remember? (But in that case, wouldn't they push her to break up with Nol? Or are they pushing her towards Kousuke, hoping she can get with the "good Hirarahara" boy? So many questions with them.) She didn't witness Nol punching Sangchul, but the news of his "violent behavior" is probably enough, yes, to make her think of him as getting "riled up".

I wonder how much of that side of Nol Alyssa knows about - I don't think he's SHOWN it often, because Nol seems really good at hiding it, but at the same time, when it comes to Kousuke he struggles to stay in check. Have there been many opportunities for her to observe them together? Was there ever a time when Nol would get riled up and would call/talk to Alyssa or did they never reach such a level where he was able to try that?

How do you think he would feel if he learned Alyssa viewed ShinAe as dangerous based on those types of rumors?

THIS IS SUCH A GOOD QUESTION! The irony is that while I think he'd identify with Alyssa in her role in accidentally hurting Shinae, but Shinae's experience is also equally relatable to him, cast off and mischaracterized due to something in her past that was not her fault (as we believe is the case of Nol and his violent altercation). It makes me wonder if Alyssa would bring that point up - maybe yes, if the whole point is that she needs to justify her wrongdoings that she knows in her heart are wrong. I mean, I guess on the one hand, being an accident, she wouldn't really NEED to justify pushing Shinae, but suppose the event was revealed in a way that wasn't of her own doing/confession. Let's suppose someone from middle school went online and made a bullying reveal re: Alyssa, that they knew she pushed someone over the rail and caused a serious injury and "she's not the good girl image she puts on, believe me, she's not as nice as she seems". In that case, yes, I think she would panic and become defensive, overexplain things, insist that she didn't mean to doing it she didn't want to hurt her, but double down and insist that she was scared of her and everyone said she was violent and she heard she beat up someone really bad and she reacted. (I guess in this scenario it's not really able to connect to Shinae, though, and that's what is really important here. It has to be revealed in a way that reveals it was an altercation between her and Shinae. I used to dream of Nol getting dragged to Minhyuk's party and them seeing Alyssa on tv would lead to Minhyuk saying something about it lol but that's clearly not happening. I still think there's room for Alyssa to accidentally confess to it in order to save her own ass but find out that Nol didn't actually know and she never had to confess but this is convoluted lol. Maybe it would be enough for the bullying post to say that the girl she pushed was bullied by everyone and everyone thought she was really violent and stuff, enough for Nol to connect with the bullied person aka Shinae?)

I can't believe I never thought of this before but now I really, really want Nol to learn this of Shinae - because he's so certain that he is what people see him as, he seems to be giving in to the perception, but if he learned that people had thought the same of Shinae as they do him, I think it would wreck him? Because he knows what kind of person she is and has seen vulnerable parts of her. She became a friend he cared about and I think it would hurt him to know that anyone ever treated her that way, that she went through what he did, when she never deserved it. And BECAUSE he knows it's a situation the same as his, it might be easy for him to deduce that the stories told about her weren't true. We could argue that he has no way to know it's not the case, but I think he knows her well enough as well as his own situation that he wouldn't believe it. Would it be able to teach him that if Shinae deserves that kind of understanding from him, that he deserves it from his own friends? Would it show him that there are people who will always see ugly monsters in people but that doesn't make them true? God I would hope so.

But regarding Alyssa, I'm very torn here. It would be easy for him to relate to both of them, and I think it would depend on which version of himself he's willing to embrace: the version who only brings harm to those who he loves and is seen as a monster; or the version of him who was framed a monster, who no one ever truly saw for who they really are, the version of himself who lived in the shadow of someone he never was. And if he chose the latter, would it affect his view of Alyssa? On the one hand, she was young, can he blame her for believing the stories people told? But on the other, like he was, Shinae was also young when she was bullied and treated as something she wasn't, and did she deserve that? I guess the most neutral reaction would be to understand Alyssa but also sympathize with Shinae.

(Another thought I need to come back to later but not in this post because wow this is long lmao is: what does Nol feel about Alyssa? Has he ever had feelings for her? What did her friendship mean to him? And yes this is partly inspired by the 168 Fast Pass but it's something I've been thinking about more and more since I made that last post about Alyssa's past!)

[lightcomingthroughthedarkness]

What I don't understand is some Bellarkes insisting that there's a point to B/E still existing and JRot didn't write them out of pure spite. I get it they are new in the fandom. But I'm not gonna act like there's a love triangle that blocks Bellarke after S5. It simply isn't a love triangle. Not to mention, JRot tweeted "heh heh heh" everytime B/E interacted on screen, even when the sex scene aired. He purposefully wrote that relationship to spit on Bellarkes and serve to CLs. It's just so clear

I just want to make one thing clear before I answer this. I can dislike Ec.ho while also not belive that everything Jason does is to spite me or the fandom. Just wanted to put it out there, lol

Anyway, lets get to it. This is long.

1. Bellamy is emotionally cheating on Ec.ho yet he yells at Ec.ho for not being emotionally open with him.

2. Bellamy is not being emotionally open with Clarke, yet he yells at Ec.ho for not being emotionally open with him meanwhile he is also staying emotionally unavailable to Clarke too.

3. Clarke is unaware of any romantic feelings that Bellamy might have for her. Simply because Bellamy is not emotionally open with her about said feelings. And when he has done something or been called out for having feelings for Clarke, she has not been there to hear it or see it. Now, we all know Clarke is a fucking legend, but she’s not a damn mind reader.

4. Bellamy has no indication that Clarke has ANY romantic feelings for him at all. Why? Because Clarke took a step back when she saw that Bellamy was with Ec.ho. And then Bellamy continued to CHOOSE Ec.ho over Clarke SEVERAL times. Clarke does not feel like it is her place to say anything to a man that is in a serious and commented relationship. Therefor, even if Bellamy had feelings for Clarke, he doesn’t know if she returns them. 

5. Ec.ho is clueless. Girl is void of not only a personality but apperently also of the gift of sight and hearing too. She has no thoughts, no worries, no idea, no opinion, no nothing. 

What is absolutely true, nonny is that B/E is DEFINITELY blocking Bellarke for a REASON. If they had kept Bellamy and Ec.ho friends/family then it would have shown us what we’ve all been screaming about being enough; Bellamy becoming the kind of leader that forgives and understands people and still reaches out to “them” in order to make an “us”.

I mean look at all the other relationships on the Ark after the time jump. Harper and Monty were still together. Raven was forever alone, like always. Murphy and Emori were...Murphy and Emori. They still only had storylines with each other mostly. And all of them managed to develop familiar bonds to the members of the group. 

The only difference in those 6 years, was Bellamy’s relationship status. By showing Bellamy as part of a family, you had already given Bellamy that development, but we never got to see it (big mistake). So why did we need Bellamy to be in a relationship with Ec.ho at all?

Their names are Octavia Blake and Clarke Griffin.

Those two women are the ONLY reason why Bellamy “had” to be in a relationship with Ec.ho. Octavia hated Ec.ho. Yet Bellamy made her his family AND started dating her. Here’s the thing with the Blakes; you didn’t need Ec.ho to be Bellamy’s girlfriend to kick it to Octavia. Just the simple fact that Bellamy made his own family and chose Ec.ho to be part of that family was the biggest problem for Octavia. That Bellamy had grown as a person to let someone like Ec.ho be part of his family, even though what she had done to Octavia. Bellamy needed to leave Octavia for his new family for Octavia to understand what she was losing. So that was as much of B/E that we needed for that story to be told. Bellamy choosing his family based on love and support and Octavia working through her idea of what family is based on blood or love. 

So why did B/E need to stay together after that and why are they still together? Because B/E need to block Bellarke. That is the ENTIRE point of B/E. There’s no love story. There’s no development. Jason refused to have Bellamy and Clarke both single and then not have them act on any feelings. And if you keep Clarke and Bellamy both single and they act on no feelings or the connection they share, then they truly would only be platonic soulmates. There would be no romantic subtext for Bellarke and we’d all get the answer to that question. Jason is clearly not willing to give that answer, so he needs something to block Bellarke. There’s no other way around it. And because Ec.ho’s existence allows Jason to tell SEVERAL stories. (family, found family, The Blakes, Bellarke). That’s the reason TT was made a main cast member. They needed to lock her ass in, so that Jason would be able to tell this story. And it’s important for all of us to understand that Jason WANTS to tell this story. You and I might hate it, we might have wanted another story but this is what he wanted and decided to do. 

And what is also true, is that Jason is an ass. He’s a Hollywood writer and he sucks at social media. Yes, he has made comments during B/E scenes and made fun of fans. I assume he does that because fans can be very horrible to him, so he dishes it out too sometimes and acts cheeky with it (although he’s not and he is part of the problem too). And also, Jason knows how unpopular B/E is and again, he thinks he’s funny and makes comments to rile people up. Lol lol lol, indeed. 

My PERSONAL opinion is that I just do not trust Jason to follow through on Bellarke or give them an ending I see fit for them. Jason never has to give a direct answer to what Bellarke are. He can still keep doing what he is doing. Ambigiously writing them as soulmates but leaving it up to the audience to decide what that means. B/E is not the hill Bellarke dies on because B/E has a better story or development. Absolutely not. But that doesn’t mean that when the final credits roll, that Bellarke has become what fandom expects. I’ll only believe it when I see it on screen and not a moment sooner. 

You can argue that this entire thing is not good storytelling or the development would have been better told if Jason had written other stories. I can agree with that. I still think Bellarke should have been canon in season 4 and I still think season 5 and season 6 lack quality even though I still love Bellarke. It sucks when TV shows choose to do stuff with the story that we don’t agree with. But it doesn’t mean that an entire TV show, a business, a place where a lot of people work on, is written after fandom drama on stan twitter. What Jason IS doing, in order to not answer the Bellarke question, is to make people unsure of the story onscreen. There’s a major gaslighting situation with this show and the fandom and even Bob Morley had an opinion about that. Both things can sadly enough be true. Jason doesn’t write his entire story around fandom drama on stan twitter but he is absolutely gaslighting people too in the name of protecting his creation/story, before he is ready for people to see how it ends.

And here’s the thing, we can all have different interpretations of this. God knows a lot of fandom has given up and don’t believe in Bellarke anymore. And a lot of people have not given up and still trust Jason. And we need to just let everyone do what is best for them. We’re not going to change people minds and we don’t need to fight about it either. It’s not gonna do us any good. We can just see what happens in season 7 and by 7x16, we might get an answer to what Bellarke are.

[one-abuse-survivor]

before i start, thank you so much for doing what you do;this blog has given me good advice countless times and i really have to thank you for that.

my issues with my parents are that they don't take me seriously. i can literally go up to them and say: "mom/dad, i think i might be autistic or have ADHD (both would be quite likely) can i get that checked out" and list a bunch of examples why i think that and they'll just be "nah, that can't be, you don't seem like that at all" as of i didn't break my mind over it researching it and talking to people who have it to see if we've had similar experiences just to get some kind of reference as to why i feel the way i feel and why i struggle so much with things that so many other people find so easy.

but then, in the following weeks and months (after talking w them) they just randomly point out things about me that kinda annoy them, like me talking out of turn a LOT or me not looking at people or me having trouble focusing if there isn't also music and a movie going at the same time or mom saying that i seem hyperactive to her because i'm always moving my legs or pacing around or rubbing my hands or drumming on the table with pens. things like that (plus a lot more) were the exact things i was telling them about and they just put it off like it's nothing but as soon as it affects and annoys them it's suddenly very real. at this point i'm struggling to talk to my parents about anything even remotely more serious than generic smalltalk and i'm having a hard time believing myself that my struggles are in fact real and i'm not just making them up.

and also on a less related note; the thing i hate most about my parents: if i'm wearing headphones and couldn't understand what a parent was yelling from somewhere else in the house then it's my fault. but if it's the exact same situation but i'm the one calling and they couldn't hear me, then it's obviously my fault too (i kinda get the first one but srsly how could i not wear headphones when they're constantly arguing with my brother in the room next to mine) (either way if one of the scenarios is clearly my fault, then the other shld be clearly their fault bc that's how logic works)

hhhh, this got quite long. i would love to hear your thoughts about this

a continuation from the other ask about my parents not taking me seriously even when i ask them for help with my hardest problems. that ask didn't really go in the direction i had planned but there is so much going on between my parents and me that i really need to talk to someone about

background: i'm around 15-16 rn and have a brother who's 18. primary school was academically very easy for me (lots and lots of great and even perfect grades) but my brother didn't have it as easy (lots and lots of mediocre and meh grades) so my parents really just kinda let me do my thing while they were constantly busy with my brother. so i got really independant and did all of my stuff on my own bc a) i always had done it that way and b) my parents were already busy and stressed. but after my brother got his first computer and got into video games his grades dropped and my parents started constantly arguing with him and taking away his computer and stuff like that so there was always a lot of tension (and i got to a point where i can't handle people yelling; that's what i was referring to with the headphone thingy at the end of the last ask) i don't know if i can go that far and say that my parents kinda neglected me and my emotional needs in favour of saving my brother grades but that's pretty much the way it feels.

i'm now a sophomore (school works a bit different here but i'm the equivalent of a highschool sophomore afaik, here it's just 10th grade) and starting from about mid 8th grade (end of 2018) i've been struggling a lot with self care and upkeep of my already minimal social circle and academic stuff (i'm at the academically highest level of school you could be at my age without skipping any years) and also mental health.

i got quite depressive and started isolating myself and casting away friends and my grades went down a lot, which really disappointed me because my great grades were kind of my trademark thing. but i didn't feel safe talking to my parents because of the huge distance that we built by me "never" needing their help with stuff.

in that time (almost a year ago, our anniversary is in twenty days or so) i got a girlfriend and i'm hella glad that i can talk to her about everything but i feel like i can't just go dump trauma and parent issues on her forever

about last november or so i was at a pretty low point and was suicidal and that's kind of when i snapped and went to my parents to talk so being cast away and having my issues invalidated really really hurt then and made me spiral even deeper and my gf was the only thing keeping me afloat.

i'm kind of a bit better now but i have rebuilt my view of my parents from "idk we never really interact" to "trying to interact or talk is not worth the energy" and needless to say i don't like them that much

oh and i forgot about all the times i got panic attacks and sensory overloads @ school because there are so many people there (1700 students + 200 teachers) and it's loud everywhere and of course asking my parents for what to do if suddenly everything is too bright and too loud and you can't move or talk because of it didn't get me anywhere (and since i didn't know what it was called or how to describe it properly, i didn't really find any Information online either

and just typing this makes me think of so many more things that they did that aren't okay things to do (a lot of gender identity stuff for example because i'm also neck-deep in that) . but writing this has also helped a lot right now. thank you for being there and listening.

and just in case i'm ever gonna pop back in to say something i'm gonna drop a name for easier identifying

sincerely - 🌌 milky way anon

Hi, nonnie! Thanks for the kind words, I'm really glad my blog has been of help ❤️

I'm sorry your parents are making it hard to believe your struggles are real :( you deserve to be taken seriously and to get access to all the help you might need. Just the fact your symptoms are there and you're noticing them and they're interfering with your daily life is enough to get them checked, regardless of if you need a diagnosis/meds/anything else. No one deserves to live wondering if their struggles are worth discussing with a doctor or professional.

And you're right: if one of those things was your fault, then the other should be theirs, logically. But I don't even think it's "your fault" you didn't hear them because you were wearing headphones, to be honest. I think it's just something that happens from time to time and that doesn't warrant getting mad over; I think it's the kind of thing that simply needs to be talked about so everyone in the household knows how to communicate with everyone else without getting frustrated. It's as easy as saying "hey, whenever I put on headphones I'll just text the family group chat to let you guys know I won't hear you. If you need anything in those moments, just text me instead". I do this with my girlfriend sometimes—if we're wearing headphones and we're in the same room, we simply pat each other when we need something and wait until the other takes off their headphones to talk. It really doesn't have to be an issue where anyone is to blame. You're allowed to take steps to feel safe and comfortable in your house without getting punished for it.

But, of course, this doesn't work if the people around you choose to prioritise "being right" and proving you're wrong over a peaceful and healthy cohabitation, which is what most toxic and abusive people do.

As for your second ask, I would say if it feels like your parents neglected you and your needs because they were always focusing on your brother, then it's okay to say that they did. The fact alone that those feelings are there makes you deserving of talking about it and wanting to heal from it; the cause of those feelings doesn't have to be something major, or sound deeply traumatising when you say it out loud, in order to "count". And people whose emotional needs were consistently met don't feel like they weren't.

I've already shared this video before, but if you want some resources on identifying and healing from emotional neglect, I really recommend watching it. Please bear in mind, though, that the video says it's important to not blame parents for emotionally neglecting you, but I don't think that's the message a lot of people need to hear and I think you should allow yourself to feel angry at your parents for not meeting your needs and causing you trauma. That's pretty much the only thing I'd criticise about the video.

I'm sorry to hear you've been struggling with your grades and mental health lately, nonnie. I had a quite similar experience when I was in high school—I used to always get great grades, but my mental health and trauma put a lot of strain on them (as well as on my social life; I lost a lot of friends in those years) and it was really distressing to see the only thing that made me "worthy" crumble between my fingers like that. I'm still trying to unlearn this idea that your grades define your worth, and it's been really hard.

I'm so sorry your parents weren't there for you when you hit that low 😔 I'm glad your girlfriend could help you stay afloat in that moment, but they absolutely should've been there for you all those times you reached out to them for help with your struggles, and the fact that they didn't is emotionally neglectful of them.

I'm glad you're in a better place now ❤️ I really hope you can find out all the information you need on gender identity and sensory overload and any other issues that might be affecting you. Know that you deserve for your parents to be there for you. You shouldn't have to face any of this on your own, or even with only the support of other people your age. You deserve for them to care. You deserve to have your symptoms checked out. You deserve adult guidance to find resources to help you better understand and manage your struggles.

Sending all my virtual support your way ❤️ and happy belated anniversary to you and your girlfriend!

[lightcomingthroughthedarkness]

Meh, I don't think the spoiler is true. From what I know they only gave out episode 4 and 5 as screeners. How did this source (that is from that other ship that I shall not name) get the info for ep 6? Totally agree with you btw, I'm not even sweating over this. I'm just gonna look at all the endgame which is BELLARKE! P.S. Notice how bad spoilers always comes out after we get great development for Bellarke? Hmm...

Hi, nonny.

I don’t really care if the spoilers are true or not (but wouldn’t surprise me if they are). I can either freak out and wallow in frustration (which is exhausting) or I can roll with whatever happens, (and only roll my eyes sometimes) and just take it as it comes. I choose the latter. Besides, what’s the point of worrying if I still believe Bellarke is well on their way to becoming romantically canon THIS season. Just like you anon, I have absolutely no doubt about it, so meh, it’s all good. Don’t get me wrong my Blorke heart is getting impatient and I’ve been ready for so long so I completely understand why people are annoyed by more obstacles, I am too, but don’t let the madness take over. It seems like some BC shippers feel these spoilers will compromise Bellarke but if prior storylines haven’t compromised them, surely this won’t either. Bellarke is stronger than that.