#noah kahan passenger inspired

[stick-ball]

"Tell me it wont hurt,

Now I, I’m your passenger"

Shh don’t disturb him, he’s listening to his favourite playlist. 🌞

[vapekingg]

“Between Villages”

Boyfriend!Eddie x Fem!Reader

Summary: You and Eddie are driving back to Hawkins from a concert in Indianapolis, and you’re reminiscing on ten years of shows with him. Heavily inspired by The View Between Villages by Noah Kahan.

Fluff

Banner by @saradika

Taglist: @comeonatmebruh

(Alsoooo just a reminder that my requests are open!)

You sit curled up in the passenger seat of Eddie’s van as he makes his way down the interstate. Slow and steady, far right lane the entire eighty miles from Indianapolis back to Hawkins. It’s a vast difference from how he typically makes the forward journey.

The two of you have been making this drive since you were sixteen. Not that he got his license then or anything, but that was when Wayne started letting him take the car. That was when your mom felt comfortable letting you be something like an adult.

From that moment on, it’s been every weekend. Eighty miles there, eighty miles back. An hour and a half, give or take. This time Gareth and Jeff are piled into the backseat. They’re out cold. You can hear their gentle snores just over the hum of an engine that’s begging to go out. The sounds of the interstate create a white noise that suspends time and allows you to slip into a meditative state. Tires on pavement, the rush of cars speeding past as Eddie keeps his even sixty-five miles per hour. This is your favorite part about shows with him.

Blackness swallows you. You and Eddie are illuminated only dimly by the lights on his dashboard. A neon blue hue that accentuates his facial features when he glances at you but does not caricaturize them.

He smiles, eyes heavy. He shouldn’t be driving right now, the least you could do is take turns, but he’d have none of that.

This was your routine.

With your head resting against the seat, you smile back. Nothing is said, and nothing has to be. Eddie doesn’t turn on the radio. You’ve been permanently damaging your hearing since you hit the road at four p.m., tinnitus still rings in your ears and causes everything to feel a little unbelievable, a little ethereal.

Eddie moves his hand across the center console to rest on your thigh. Soon enough, his arms will be wrapped around your front as he drags you backward against him in bed. You’ll have the most peaceful sleep of your life. It’s the perfect end to your Saturday routine, has been for a decade now.

“You have fun?” He asks quietly with a gentle squeeze.

His smile is the same one that you admire in a room full of people. Even with Iron Maiden playing on the stage feet away, he always looks for you. Always ensures that the crowd hasn’t pulled you too far from him.

You move your hand over his and intertwine your fingers, tugging the back of his palm to your lips. His fingers are decorated with tattoos and scars. Your initial is inked permanently onto his other hand, ring finger, as is his initial on yours. His knuckles meet your lips and you kiss them tenderly, watching as he winces in pain from the fight he’d gotten into earlier.

Maybe some partners wouldn’t put up with it, but all you can picture is another ten years of Saturday concert routines. Another ten years of music and empty highways. Another ten years of gentleness for you both after a lifetime of being shown none.

You smile against his raw flesh and he strokes his thumb over the ball of your cheek.

“Always have fun with you.” You answer.

[ilikecrowns]

Stressed out

Alessia russo x f!reader

After a tough few weeks Alessia has been getting very overwhelmed, and one day at training it got too much for her.

part two maybe?

warnings- slight angst, but mainly fluff :)

1.3k words

not sure how to feel about this, but please lmk what you think!

　　　　　　。・°°・(＞_＜)・°°・。

“Less, please, you’ve been running around like a headless chicken all day!” I say, grabbing Alessia’s hands and trying to get her to stop pacing across our bedroom.

“But…but I’ve got to get to training and I’ve still not finished my uni application and and and…” I could sense how riled up and frustrated my girlfriend was getting, so I settled on staring deeply into her eyes making sure she could focus on nothing else in that moment other than the rhythm of my breathing and eyes looking into hers.

Eventually, her breathing evened out and her chest went from a palpitating mess to a steady rise and fall.

“Lessi, whatever’s done, is done. If you haven’t sent in your application by the end of the day the world will not end. You have a whole week, no? And training is your top priority right now, so just focus on getting ready for that. Would you like me to make you something to eat for the way there? I can drive too if you’re feeling too overwhelmed,”

Before saying anything in reply, Alessia allowed a warm smile to grace her face. A few tears sprung up in her eyes and then the flood gates opened. Tear upon tear, every emotion my girlfriend had pent up was finally flowing freely. I grabbed her waist and guided her onto my lap, brushing her blonde hairs out of her face. She went to cover her eyes and nose with her hands (which by now were shaking hard), and rested her head on my shoulder.

After letting her cry for a few minutes, I lifted her head from my shoulder and held her red face in my hands.

Giving her my best smile and a light peck to her nose, I stood up, lifting her onto my hip and carrying her into the kitchen of our apartment, before setting her down on the counter.

“Love, you work so so hard and anyone can see that. I know it’s so stressful right now, especially with you worrying about getting a call up from Sarina for the next national games, but everyone on the face of the earth can agree how much you mean to the team and women’s football in general. You inspire your whole squad, all of arsenal, every woman and little girl out there, and especially, me! So please, Less, take it easy on yourself. I would offer you stay home from training today, but I think getting out all your anger could do you some good.”

She just nodded and wiped away the tears still flowing from her eyes, before letting another of her award winning smiles appear.

After I made her a small snack and guided her to our car (although I tried to convince her to let me drive, no one can take over Less’s Merc), making sure to settle into the passenger seat and turn up her favourite songs by Luke Combs.

Once we’d arrived to training, I gave my girlfriend a light kiss on the lips, taking her hand and walking into the main building. It was almost like I was her mother guiding her on the first day of school, however this was not the first time we’d been in this situation.

All throughout training she stumbled and tripped, allowing easy passes to whiz straight between her legs, standing like a deer in headlights. Everytime she messed up I could see her dam break and break, every ounce of self respect leaving her body.

This didn’t stop the rest of the team being harsh and yelling out comments that were maybe a little uncalled for. Once Beth had stomped her way over to Alessia and furled her eyebrows, shaking her head out of pure discontent, did she notice the glassed over gleam in her eyes, and distant expression.

Every word Beth was saying flew straight through Lessi’s mind, only vague shadows of light cast upon her eyes and reached her brain. Every breath became hard and her chest rose and fell at a faster and faster pace.

Stars started forming, clouding her vision fully until it was just as hard to stay on two legs as it was to win the world cup for her.

I tried my very best to make it over to her in time, with Beth still ranting harsh words, but it was too late.

Alessia was lying on the floor, a passed out mess.

I yelled, shoving Beth and the other girls who were now forming a crowd against the blonde girl’s body out of the way, resting her pretty head on my lap.

“Thanks, Beth! See what you’ve done! The poor girl has been so stressed and overwhelmed all week and now you’ve finally tipped her off! Go on, go get the medic!” I cried, trying to not say something I really shouldn’t do.

I could tell Beth felt remorseful, as she simply nodded and turned towards the main building to grab the nurse.

I cradled Alessia in my arms, calling out for her softly to wake up. Her brow creased and her lips pouted, she looked so soft and angelic and like she could do no wrong.

“Lessi bear, please. Please wake up, it’s okay everything is okay,” tears start falling from my eyes now too as all this pressure and stress has been getting to me too.

After a few minutes the medics arrived and slowly but surely Alessia’s eyes flickered open. Her beautiful blue moons started focusing on me, her breathing growing to a normal rhythm.

I smiled down at her, a few tears still streaming. She just kept focusing on me until the medics decided to take her into the main building to run a few tests.

One of them took me to the side to ask a few questions.

“How much sleep has Alessia been getting recently?” I pondered the question for a few seconds, until I realised i couldn’t remember the last time Alessia slept throughout the whole night.

“Uhm… well. She gets a few hours a day.” The medic just nodded, writing a few notes down onto her notepad.

“And has anything been going on in her life that you’d be okay with telling me for medical reasons?” I took a deep breath and decided that the best thing to do was tell the truth, for Lessi’s sake more than anything.

“Yeah… she’s had panic attacks everyday over her future. She doesn’t think she’s good enough to play and therefore is so freaked out about university and having a second option. She also hasn’t been eating properly and her lack of sleep has been causing her to perform at her lowest, which is just stressing her out even more! I honestly don’t know what to do.”

The medic took down some more notes, before clearing her throat and finding the right words to say.

“I think she needs to stay at home for a few days, until she can figure out that her stress is what’s causing everything else. I’ll also need to track her health for a little while just to make sure she’s okay to continue playing. Would that be okay? If there isn’t anyone to look after her, you can take a few days off too.”

I agreed immediately, knowing that everything the medic said was right.

“Okay, i’ll take a few days off with her and hopefully she’ll get better before the call ups. Please, don’t tell Sarina, I don’t want her to worry and cut her out of the team!”

“Of course, this is all between us.” The medic then smiled, before turning to leave the room and confirm if Alessia was ready to go home or not.

A few minutes later, the medic returned with a very sad looking Alessia.

Immediately, I ran over to her and threw my arms over her shoulders, drawing the beautiful blonde into my body.

“Lessi girl you got me so worried, please never let this happen again.” I felt her nod against my shoulder, her strong arms squeezing me tight around my waist, signalling that all she wanted in that moment was me.

“Let’s get you home, love. Everything is going to be okay.”

[zvdvdlvr]

— Drive All Night

— 🖊️. Synopsis. You’ve been quiet; more quiet than normal. Gibbs wants you to know that despite as stoic as he is, he does care. (inspired by ‘call your mom’ by noah kahan and lizzy mcalpine)

— 🖊️. Warnings. Ooc Gibbs but idc. Comfort fic kinda. I self project. Mentions suicide. Mentions Shannon and Kelly Gibbs.

— 🖊️. Tracklist. Track One Track Two Track Three Track Four Track Five

Gibbs looked over at your form, slumped over. He looked at his watch: 23:37. You were usually the person to stay late, to work on the things that were undesirable for everyone else. You hadn’t left the building earlier than 20:00 in months.

He knew why- or rather, knew of why you stayed late. Jenny had told him you had problems, problems taking care of yourself and neglecting yourself; sometimes choosing to take out your own anger and depression on yourself. But you were the best of the best. In fact, you were the best and the youngest. Aged twenty eight.

“Y/n.”

You snapped up, eyes landing on your boss’s. “What’s- what do you need?” You asked, setting your pen down and closing the file.

Gibbs watched you watch him, rigid in your chair.

He knew you were scared to trust; to open your heart and let people in. You had been working for NCIS and had only went out for drinks with the team thrice- Ducky’s birthday, Ziva’s birthday, and Abby’s birthday. You were included, but you seperated yourself for reasons unknown.

“I want to go for a drive. Come with me,” Gibbs said.

Lately, Gibbs had noticed how tired you were, closing your eyes for longer amounts of time, straight chugging your coffee, and getting in and leaving althe office after Gibbs got there. But you were efficient, getting not only your paperwork done, but working on most of Tony’s as well (something that made Gibbs unusually mad).

You were literally working yourself to death and chose to add more to the pile. Was it to get away from your thoughts? To get away from your home situation? What were you running from?

“I have work to do-“

Gibbs chuckled. “You’re the fastest agent to complete their paperwork. You do Tony’s. Tim’s, even. You’re more than ahead on your reports.”

You gnawed at your lip. “Sir, I’m getting ready to go home.”

Liar. Gibbs shook his head in amusement. “That’s an order, y/n.”

At that, you shut off your light and grabbed your coat. “Ok.”

The walk to the elevator was quiet. You wondered what Gibbs wanted. Were you getting fired? You had not done anything out of the ordinary recently… what could Gibbs want?

You climbed into the passenger seat and prayed you were keeping your job.

Gibbs started the truck and drove out of the parking lot. “So,” he started.

You didn’t say anything. You just looked out the window, taking in the life. “What do you want?”

“To know,” Gibbs replied. He turned down the radio and kept his eyes trained forward.

“Know about…?” You prompted, cutious as to what he wanted.

Gibbs shrugged. “You.”

“Y/n l/n, aged 28. My eyes are-“

“Not from your file.”

Silence fell. You didn’t have amything interesting to say about yourself other than the fact that you went to the gym and had an extensive collection of sunset polaroids. And there was no way Gibbs wanted to know about your childhood. That sould be disappointing. Disappointing to tell him about how ordinary and unimportant you were, your own family leaving you. It’s disappointing- exactly the reason why she did what she did: to be more than disappointing. In fact, you had a new reason not to be a disappointment: Gibbs. He, in your time at NCIS, had become one of the few people you never wanted to disappoint.

“Well then… I don’t know what you want to know,” you mumbled dully. Please, you thought, don’t let this change your opinion of me.

Gibbs looked over to see you already looking at him. He couldn’t see your expression, but you looked like you were already thinking about what he would say next.

“Tell me something, y/n. Anything.” Gibbs stated. He slowed down and turned left. He himself didn’t seem to have a destination, making you wonder how long Gibbs would drive around.

You didn’t want to talk, but you yearned for Gibbs to know, to look at everything you’ve gone through and done and understand why you are the way you are.

Of course you trust him, though. That’s not the problem for once. The problem is you don’t want Gibbs to get the wrong impression of you, or come to the conclusion that you’re a fraud or something.

“Tell me something about you first,” you shot back easily, relaxing a little bit into the seat.

So, Gibbs told you about a woman named Shannon and a beautiful baby girl named Kelly. He told you about Shannon’s rules, how he knew that she was the one. A young Leroy Gibbs knew that Shannon Fielding would be the love of his life.

And Gibbs also told you about the case that killed them: the gun, the bullet, and the casing. He told you about his habits after they died, how cold and snappy he was. He told you about- despite his madness- a certain Donald Mallard kept forcing his way into Gibbs’ life, making sure Gibbs knew he wasn’t alone.

“What I’m tryin’ to tell ya is… we are here for you, kid. You aren’t truly alone in this miserable world,” Gibbs finished quietly.

By now, Gibbs had parked in front of a house- his house?- and completely torn down the barrier between boss and coworker.

You weren’t gonna lie, you were crying by now. Tears silently streaming down your cheeks as the man you most admired and looked up to told you about the best and worst days of his life- all the while he had no idea about who you are.

“I didn’t-“ you started, sniffling. You turned to look at him, tears blurring your vision. Some of the phrases he had used to describe his pain rang in your ears and Gibbs knew it- he knew you could relate to some of the things he said and felt.

“Stay the night, kiddo,” Gibbs said, reaching over to pat your shoulder.

As he exited the truck, you felt more tears burning in your eyes: that pat on the back literally gave y/n a reason to live.

Maybe, y/n thought, all the lights that had shut off could turn back on.

[humblequestvinyl]

the view between villages

THE VIEW BETWEEN VILLAGES, FISHER BROTHERS X SISTER!READER

APART OF THE ‘WE’LL ALL BE HERE FOREVER’ SERIES

SUMMARY: after the death of her mother, the youngest fisher takes a drive away from the chaos, leaving her back in cousin’s, where for the first time in six weeks, everything’s still.

inspired by the view between villages by noah kahan.

◀ ⏸ ▶

lowercase intentional! wc: 1.5k

warnings: swearing, cancer, death of a loved one,grief, really really bad eating habits (please be cautious!) mentions of insomnia (?), breakdown, the summer i turned pretty spoilers!!!!! 

a/n: noah kahan’s deluxe album of stick season came out and here we are.psa, i’m declaring cousins is in MA lol & im projecting some of my grief into here as well so pls enjoy!!

GRABBING HER KEYS OFF OF THE SIDE OF HER BEDROOM TABLE,

y/n fisher snuck down the stairs of her house, with the only sound echoing off the walls were her keys jingling as she made her way out, and the door locking behind her.

as she made her way out, she saw her car sitting in the same spot it had been for the past six days.

slowly opening the door to the 98 mustang, y/n got in, before turning the key, and the opening notes to marjorie by taylor swift had started to play. quickly shutting off her radio, the girl took in a shaky breath, trying to keep her composure until she got to her destination.

deciding to hit shuffle on her playlist, y/n gripped the wheel hard before putting the car in reverse, and backing out of her driveway in cambridge massachusetts.

it would take her an hour to get to where she needed to go, but the way she was going, it would take less than that. she was determined to get there as fast as she could, and as quickly as she could away from the house she used to call home.

six weeks, 4 days, and 25 minutes since she last had her mother here. 1,104 hours since she didn’t feel numbness, since she didn’t have blinding rage that turned her into a person she despised. 

46 days since the glue that held her family together came unstuck, and it all fell apart.

ever since susannah fisher had died, the youngest fisher hadn’t been the same.

grief had made her shut down, bursting at the seams with seething rage. the fisher that was known as the kindest girl in cambridge had become inconsolable, angry and resentful towards everyone around her.

she had shut out everyone who tried to get in. her best friend, belly and steven who had tried to call right after susannah had passed, and both of her brothers no matter how hard they both tried.

she was on her own, and it was her own doing. y/n knew it, her best friend grace knew it, hell- her own father who she barely acknowledged knew it.

y/n had always heard that grief changed people, it turned them into people that had been hiding deep down, under anger, sadness, resentment and agony. she never once believed it because she had never seen it. too young, too naive, and too joyful to believe that someone could change that fast at the drop of a hat.

she didn’t believe it until she became that person herself.

resentful, depressed, and in so much agony it caused her physical pain.

y/n could feel the same pain filling her as she cross the sagamore bridge, and soon enough, she was pulling into the same driveway she had left less than a year ago, except back then she had her mother right by her side, in the passenger seat as they drove back home.

exiting the car, she saw the house known as ‘beck’s house’ the same way the fisher’s had left it the summer before. with the flowers they had planted now shriveled up and dead, describing the way y/n felt.

she grabbed the blanket she always kept in the back of the car before making her way down towards the beach, with the sun barely above the horizon. purple, pink and blue painted the sky as the 16 year old wrapped herself tightly in the blanket, reminding her of her mother.

y/n couldn’t escape it. everywhere she went she saw her mother. the starbucks they would stop at everyday her freshman year, the bakery they went to every friday, and even driving the car that was once her mom’s.

everywhere she went, y/n saw susannah fisher.

it made her angry. it made her absolutely furious that everyone else could go on with their lives, with both of their parents and their families happy and joyful. it made her furious that she wouldn’t have her mom there to give her tips on how to do her makeup, to see her off to college, and she wouldn’t be able to have her mom see her in a white gown, walking down the isle as she got married.

everyone else but y/n fisher would be able to experience that.

hot angry tears started to roll down y/n’s fiery cheeks that were filled with rage, and her fists balled up, her short nails digging into her skin as she tried to watch the sunrise, but she couldn’t.

the longer she sat there, the angrier she got, before she finally ripped off her blanket, and stood up.

she looked towards the flower bed her mother always kept towards the beach, with decorative rocks holding them down, before grabbing as many as she could and tossing them into the ocean one at a time, each representing the innocence, and opportunities she had lost.

y/n watched as they sunk into the ocean, representing the sinking feeling she couldn’t get rid of no matter how hard she tried, until her hands were empty, but the agony she felt was still there.

and no matter how hard the youngest fisher tried, it continued to rise until she couldn’t take it anymore.

a scream erupted from her lips as she heard footsteps quickly approaching her, but she refused to see who it was. y/n hands shook as she searched the sand for more rocks, or even sea-shells until she found one, and chucked it as hard as she could into the ocean.

the h/c girl stopped in her position as conrad stood in front of her, stopping her from searching for more things to throw. she could see jeremiah right on the side of conrad, and the concern on their faces scared her.

it was at that moment, she felt the bottle that held all of her grief, shattered.

the hot angry tears turned into agonizing sobs, ones she couldn’t hold off any longer. for the first time since her mothers death, y/n had broke.

she felt conrad's arms wrap around her as her sobs became louder and louder, and jeremiah soon joined in, both fisher boys not realizing how bad y/n had been. grief had slowly been consuming her, and neither of them had seen it.

they both knew she hadn’t been sleeping, and the only thing they ever saw her eating or drinking was the starbucks drink she always had in her hand. the entire family was so wrapped up in their grief, they never saw how bad everyone actually was.

the fisher siblings stood there for a long time, before y/n’s tears had become silent, and y/n and conrad sat there, watching the ocean as jeremiah had run to grab the three’s breakfast from the front porch.

“how long have you been this angry?”conrad questioned as he looked over at the girl, finally taking notice of how bad she looked. she had purple bags under her eyes, and had lost so much weight that to conrad, his little sister had almost become unrecognizable. 

“almost two months.”y/n whispered as jeremiah had come back, with two starbucks bags in his hands for the fisher siblings. conrad stared at the girl as jer gave everyone their items, and y/n took a drink of her refresher, trying to avoid her brothers looks.

“why didn’t you say anything?”jer asked softly, watching as his baby sisters hands shook, and she kept silent for a few moments before finally speaking up.

“sometimes in my mind, the best thing to do is to bottle everything up and wait until i shatter.”the h/c girl explained, sniffing before she took another sip of her drink, “plus i’m not the only one grieving, you two have been as well and i didn’t want to put that on you.”

the fisher brothers shared a look, now knowing how bad things had really gotten for the girl without them realizing it. “when was the last time you slept or ate?”conrad questioned, and y/n shrugged, not really knowing how to answer the question that was presented in front of her.

“i usually try to sleep during the day. everything keeps me up at night.”she whispered, before jeremiah hugged her from the side, leaving the three siblings in silence, except for the waves crashing against the shoreline.

the fisher siblings were back in cousin’s, and everything had stilled. 

[lovableapocalypse]

dial drunk

bradley "rooster" bradshaw x fem!wife!reader

wc- 1.5k

warnings- cursing, established relationship, police station?

a/n- wife reader fyi!! i hope you guys enjoy. i saw noah kahan at acl over the weekend and was inspired to finally finish this wip. lol. also this scene from greys. love u all. lmk anything you want to see!!!

The room was crowded and humid. The open doors that led to the beach were blowing in a smooth breeze, but it was doing little to soothe your anxiety. 

Bradley was late. He tended to be on time, at most 10 minutes behind, and even then he’d always message you to let you know. So this was starting to concern you. Everyone was supposed to meet at the Hard Deck at 7 tonight, yet here you were still watching the door, 45 minutes later. 

Penny had tried to assure you he could be in traffic, given it was a Friday night, but you heavily doubted it. You were burning holes into the doorway and silently begging for his tanned self to just walk through. 

You glanced at your phone for what felt like the 100th time and shot Bradley yet another message. 

7:10 PM

You okay?

7:30 PM

Hello??

7:47 PM 

Are you asleep? Where r u

You were trying not to call attention to his absence, but your frequent calls and angry typing weren’t fooling anybody. You were getting irritated. You inhaled sharply as you now scanned the back doors. This was supposed to be a Dagger Squad (and family) night, and it bothered you that Bradley wasn’t here. 

You feel your phone vibrate in your fist, and the local unknown number showcased on your screen confuses you. You quickly move around bodies and step out into the cooling night on the back patio, answering the phone. 

“Hello?”

“Hi baby.”

It’s his voice. You know it is, but you still ask, “Bradley?”

You hear him clear his throat on the other end of the line, “Yeah, it’s me.”

“Where are you? It's almost 8 already. Everyone’s asking where you are- me included.”

“Yeah, about that,” You can hear the disappointment in his voice and can practically see him running his hands over his face, “I need you to come get me.”

“What?”

“Please.”

“Where are you?”

You hear muffled noise in the background of the call and your brows furrow further as you try to decipher where he is. 

He sighs and mumbles, “I need you to come bail me out.”

Your head shoots up from where you were studying your feet on the deck, and your voice raises as you respond, “What the fuck are you talking about?”

Bradley’s response isn’t immediate, he could tell you were pissed and confused and he knew his answer would only anger you more. “Look, I’ll explain, I promise- just please come.”

You pull the phone away from your face, dumbfounded that your husband was asking you to come bail him out. 

You hear him mutter another “Please” before you hang up the phone and storm back into the Hard Deck. 

Your quick angry pace gathered attention from others and as you harshly grab your purse off the bar top, Hangman approaches you. 

“You alright?” He questions. 

“I have to go bail Bradley out of fucking jail.”

Jake’s jaw parts before he shakes off his initial reaction and places a calming hand over your shaking ones. 

“Fuck- okay, I’m coming with you.”

“No- Jake it’s fine. Just stay here and make sure everyone’s good.”

“Let me drive you. You probably need time to cool off anyway.” He gave you a look that said he knew he was right and you just huffed and headed out the doors. 

Jake quickly followed and unlocked his truck in an effort to help. Selfishly, he wanted to see Rooster behind bars for himself, but he also acknowledged you might need someone’s help right now too. 

He hastily pulled out of the bar and headed down the main roads. He kept glancing at you and your expression was one of utter disbelief. You were repeatedly shaking your head and trying to think of any plausible explanation for why your husband was arrested. 

Jake swung into the police station and parked. You took some of your anger out on the passenger door, slamming it open and closed. You felt your anger multiply as you marched toward the station. 

You had dressed up for this evening. You wore your favorite summer dress and had even taken the time to style your hair. Now that would be wasted on police officers and other arrestees. 

Jake was quick behind you, not wanting to miss a single moment of this. You pulled the front door open and your irritation was clear as day. The receptionist asked you how she could help, and your response was anything but pleased, “My husband asked me to come bail him out.”

She gave you a sympathetic look. “Name?”

“Bradshaw. Bradley Bradshaw.” You shot out. Jake huffed a laugh from behind you, and you whacked his arm in annoyance. 

“Right,” the receptionist typed on her computer. “He’s here.” 

She asked for your ID and had Jake stay in the front lobby while you followed her back to the holding cell. You could see him. He was sitting on the bench in the cell with his head in his hands. He seemed to be rubbing his eyes in frustration with the heel of his hands. 

“Bradshaw.” You spit as you approach the bars. His head shoots up and he stands fast, moving towards you. 

“Hey honey.” He says as he grabs onto the bars of the cell. The two other guys in there with him laugh and observe you.

“What the hell?” You ask. Bradley leans towards you through the bars and shakes out an embarrassed laugh. You raise your brows in question and he knows he can’t avoid an explanation any longer. 

He glances at the receptionist behind you and at the idle cops at their desks, and exhales quietly, “I was speeding.”

“You got thrown in jail for speeding?” Your tone is incredulous. 

He bows his head and leans more of his weight onto the bars. When he finally glances back up at your expectant expression he admits, “I was being a dick to the cop. He didn’t like my sarcasm I guess. Or he just had no sense of humor.” His eyes move to who you guess is the cop that arrested him and he shakes his head again.

You sigh. Bradley reaches through the bars and clasps your hand in his. He can feel your irritation radiating off of you, but also the ridiculousness of it all. He pulls you closer and you let him. He gives you a smirk you know all too well, and he places a soft kiss on your lips through the metal. 

You shake your head and turn around to the receptionist, “What do I need to sign to get him out?”

You hear Bradley’s airy laugh behind you and the woman leads you to a desk to fill out the correct forms. The cop was nice enough to not formally charge Bradley with anything, just wanted to teach his smart mouth a lesson. 

Once you’ve signed the appropriate forms and taken an opportunity to chat to your lovely local officers, mostly to watch Bradley squirm impatiently, a cop takes the keys and walks to the cell. Bradley steps back and watches him unlock the giant door. 

A now free man, Bradley approaches you steadily. As much as you’re annoyed and want to give him grief for his earlier absence, you’re glad he’s safe and okay. He reaches for you and you meet him in an embrace. He places a soft kiss to the side of your head and you sigh into him. 

“Please don’t ever call me from a police station again.”

He squeezes you tighter and nods but then says, “I make no promises.” His laughter is muffled as you shake your head and audibly groan in annoyance. You lightly smack his abdomen and start walking back out. 

Bradley follows behind you and when you reenter the lobby Jake is still patiently waiting, now sitting in one of the available chairs. 

Bradley stops short when he notices his colleague and friend. “You brought Hangman?” He sounds offended. 

Jake’s smile is contagious as he peers up from the magazine he was browsing. “She sure did. Wouldn’t miss this for the world Rooster.” 

You can’t help but laugh at your husband's look of betrayal. You shrug, “I’m sorry Roo, he offered to drive.”

Bradley shakes his head and fully enters the room. You hear him mutter a “Jesus Christ,” under his breath as he rubs his hands over his face. 

Jake stands and is still grinning like an idiot. He starts to head for the door when you ask, “Wait. B, where’s your car?” 

He looks like he was hoping you wouldn’t ask that question. “On the side of interstate 8 probably.” 

You’ve got to be kidding me. Bradley can see the further disappointment on your features and leans in to peck your lips. “I’m sorry.” He whispers. 

“I’ll drop you.” Jake sighs. 

You say nothing and just shake your head, grabbing Bradley’s hand and leading him out of the station. 

[cabesswtaer]

jean moreau angst song lyrics

(with one that’s a little happy)

(inspired by @you-know-i-get-itt ‘s absolutely perfect post)

I know it’s for the better

Songs: Passenger by Noah Kahan // This Is Me Trying by Taylor Swift // Stay Down by boygenius // Tell Me It’s Okay by Paramore // Evermore by Taylor Swift // You’re On Your Own Kid by Taylor Swift // Francis Forever by Mitski // Waiting Room by Phoebe Bridgers // I Always Wanna Die (Sometimes) by The 1975 // Stay Down by boygenuis

[metalnecklace]

Forgive My Northern Attitude

Pairing: Joel Miller x Reader

Words: 6298

Warnings: Canon Typical Violence, Blood and Gore, Minor Character Death, Smut, Unprotected Sex (p in v, wrap it up folks), Oral (f receiving)

Notes: Here’s a little something I wrote today to take a break from my Javi fic! I have a part two already planned but won’t get to it for a little while (who knows, though. This just happened on a whim). Title is inspired by Northern Attitude by Noah Kahan, he is also who inspired my other fic title. I was just listening to the song and this entire fic mapped itself out in my head.

Summary: Joel is a man of few words, with only so much room in his heart.

Masterlist

Part II

2003

Six thirty. It was six thirty and he was late.

I was exhausted, the sun was too much for me that day, and Joel was supposed to pick up his truck half an hour ago.

When I was about to reach for the phone to give him a call I heard the telltale rumble of Tommy’s truck. I rolled my eyes and walked out to the parking lot, waving my hand in front of my face to clear the dust his tires kicked up as Tommy rolled down the window of his truck.

“Hey there, darlin’,” he drawled as Joel got out of the passenger side. “How are you this fine evening?”

“I’d be much better if you assholes weren’t late!” I scolded, but the smile on my face betrayed my annoyance.

Joel sauntered over and clapped me on the shoulder. “Sorry, (Y/N). The job didn’t go as planned today, is all.”

“Yeah, yeah,” I continued to fake my frustration with the older man in front of me. “Just don’t let it happen again. You know I got a longer drive home than you.”

Joel laughed, and Tommy piped up, “that’s your own fault for wanting to live, how did you put it? ‘Among nature’?”

“Oh, screw off, Tommy!” I called out. “Beats living anywhere near your ass!”

I ignored anymore comments from Tommy and held Joel’s keys up for him to take. “How’s it runnin’ now?”

I shrugged. “Pretty smooth. I changed out the right front calipers and rebalanced the tires. Should feel good as new. If only it smelled like it.”

He smiled at me, my heart stuttering. “Thanks.”

“No problem.” I smiled back.

Tommy got out of his truck, fed up with us ignoring him. “How’s Freddy doing?”

My older brother, Freddy, was how I met Joel and Tommy. They had worked together for years after him and Tommy fought together. The three of them were quite close, and when Tommy’s truck broke down one day Freddy suggested they take it to me, a new up and coming mechanic in the town. I had just started my own business and although most men were too ashamed to bring their vehicles in for a woman to fix them, Joel and Tommy didn’t give a shit. It didn’t hurt that Joel was easy on the eyes, too.

The four of us had continued to grow closer through barbecues, broken down trucks, baked goods, and especially when Freddy was diagnosed with lung cancer a year ago. I had moved him in with me so he was surrounded by fresh air and nature, and we took turns taking care of him when he needed it. Trips to the hospital, company on rainy days, walks when he felt up to it. Joel and Tommy were just as patient with him and his recovery as I was, if not more.

“Not too bad. He’s quite tired these days with the chemo, but he stays pretty hopeful!” I took a clean rag out of my back pocket and used it to wipe the sweat from the back of my neck. “I was actually wondering if you guys would like to come over for a barbecue this weekend. Freddy would love to see you.”

“That’d be great! We can do a belated birthday celebration!” Tommy exclaimed, clapping Joel on the back which caused him to roll his eyes.

I laughed at Joel’s exasperation. “That’s right. Any plans for the big day tomorrow?”

Joel shook his head, shooting his brother a glare. “Nah, I gotta work. Sarah wants to do something but you know how it is.”

“Sure do,” I said. “Well, we’ll have to celebrate more this weekend, then.”

We said our goodbyes and the boys left me to close up the shop. The thirty minute drive home was peaceful, my broken radio leaving me in a nice silence until I pulled into my driveway. My house was modest, a bungalow which was perfect for Freddy’s energy levels, but I had moved mostly for the scenery. There was something about being surrounded by trees that made me feel at peace.

Freddy was washing up a few dishes when I walked in. The house smelled strongly of fresh bread and my mouth watered immediately upon entry. Because of long hours of rest, Freddy had started baking to pass the time. He found it was low enough energy, plus he got a treat out of it when his appetite allowed.

“Wow, that smells amazing,” I sighed, following the smell to the oven.

“Don’t you dare touch a thing!” He turned, catching me before I could open the oven. “They’re still rising and I do not want you messing them up. If you’re lucky I’ll make you a sandwich for work in the morning.”

I rolled my eyes, a smile on my lips. “Thanks, Freddy. How’re you feeling?”

He turned back the sink and let the water drain out before shrugging. “Same old. Okay, not great.”

Freddy was four years older than me, and four years younger than Joel. Him and Tommy were the middle tether in our group, and they were the heart too. Even when Freddy wasn’t feeling his best he tried his hardest not to show it. I knew him well enough, though.

“Why don’t we put on a movie? I’ll go shower while you pick,” I offered, hoping he didn’t realize I just didn’t want him exerting too much energy.

He just nodded and turned to the living room. I caught the way his eyes were glassy but said nothing.

By the time I finished showering Freddy had fallen asleep on the couch. He had chosen a movie I hadn’t even heard of before, the title screen frozen on our television, but I didn’t want to wake him. I laid a blanket over him, tucking it around his frail shoulders, and went into the kitchen to find something to eat. I opened the fridge but after staring blankly at the leftovers inside I decided to just call it a night.

The next morning was a rush. I had slept through my alarm and was running late. Freddy was in his bed sleeping away so I left a note telling him I’d be back in time for supper. On the way to work I realized that I had forgotten to make myself a sandwich with Freddy’s fresh bread, and grumbled to myself about how stupid I was for the rest of the drive.

When I got to my work I saw Joel’s truck parked in the driveway. I marched over and opened up the back door, finding the key tucked away under the floor mat, and got into the front. A post-it note was stuck onto the middle of the steering wheel with his chicken scratch scrawled onto it.

Check engine light came on halfway home, figured you’d want to look at it.

I groaned and thumped my head against the horn, causing it to let out a pathetic beep.

The rest of the day went by smoothly, and I was true to my word, arriving home in time for supper. Freddy was in good spirits, and had spent his day making mashed potatoes, roasted carrots, and chicken. We had run out of flour when he was making bread so he couldn’t make the gravy he had wanted to, but I reassured him his cooking was amazing no matter what.

We watched the movie we had planned to watch the night before, both of us surprisingly staying awake for it, and then got ready for bed. The phone rang as I finished brushing my teeth and I raced to the kitchen to get it before it stopped.

“(Y/N)?” Joel said before I could even say hello.

“Hey. What’s wrong, Joel?” I asked, leaning against the counter top.

“Are you and Freddy okay?” He sounded out of breath.

“Of course. What’s going on?” My brows were furrowed, which Freddy noticed when he walked into the kitchen. He was eating a sandwich with the leftover chicken.

“Listen to me very carefully.” His voice was shaky, but firm. I held on to every word. “Stay inside. Lock every door and window. Get into your basement if you can, into the room with no windows. Tommy and I are getting Sarah out of the city, then we’ll be back for you and Freddy, okay? If we aren’t back by this time tomorrow night then you need to get yourselves out. Got it?”

“Joel, what’s goin-“

“Got it?!” He growled.

“Yes, yes I got it.” The phone trembled in my hand.

“Good.”

Then he was gone.

“(Y/N)? What’s wrong?” Freddy asked.

I hung up the phone. “We need to get to the basement. Now.”

Freddy made his way to the basement while I ran around locking up the house. I also made sure to grab a backpack with a few extra clothes and toiletries just in case we’d be down there longer.

When I got to the basement I locked us into the one guest room we had. It was an unfinished room, with no windows, which made me feel grateful that there were usually no guests to stay in the room. Joel never stayed over because he didn’t want to leave Sarah alone, and Tommy usually passed out on the couch.

I looked at Freddy who was sitting on the unmade bed in the corner of the room. He was still eating his sandwich. I raised my eyebrow at him.

“What? I never have an appetite with the chemo, you know that.” He took a bite and proceeded to talk with his mouth full of bread. “I gotta take advantage when I’m actually hungry.”

I rolled my eyes and set my bag on the ground. “Whatever you say, Fred. You should get some sleep when you’re done, I don’t think I’ll be able to. Plus you need it.”

“Yeah, yeah, mom.” He grumbled, taking the last bite of his food. “You know, you should really start taking care of yourself the way you take care of me.”

My head snapped up as I focused on him. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“You work yourself to the bone, you never let yourself have a break, or any fun.” He laid down and grabbed a blanket that was folded up at the bottom of the bed to cover himself up with.

“Of course I work hard, I have to pay the bills, you know.” I felt bad as soon as the words left my mouth. I didn’t want him to feel like a burden, and never spoke about the cost of his treatment. I continued talking to get past it. “And I do have fun!”

He rolled his head to face me. “When?”

I thought for a moment. “Well… our barbecue is this weekend, that’ll be fun.”

“That brings me to my next point.” He continued on. “When are you ever gonna make a move on that man?”

My heart stopped. “What man?”

He snorted. “You know very well what man. I see the way you look at him, and he looks at you a little too often for my liking.”

“Don’t be ridiculous, he’s not interested,” I slid down the wall I had been standing against so I could sit down. “And he works so hard taking care of Sarah, I know that’s his first priority. I could never do anything to screw that up.”

He shook his head and turned so his back was facing me. “Whatever you say, (Y/N).”

I chuckled. “Good night, Freddy. Love you.”

“Love you too, (Y/N). Wake me if anything happens.”

As Freddy drifted off to sleep I found myself drifting off into my own dream world. My thoughts wandered to Joel, and I kept myself busy thinking about what life would be like if I allowed myself to indulge in this fantasy Freddy seemed to want me to.

My aching neck brought me out of my thoughts enough for me to realize I had fallen asleep. Freddy still laid on the bed, and I was still in my position on the floor but slumped over. I slowly stood up, stretching out my aching back and legs, then shivered. The basement had gotten cool in the night and my thin pajamas weren’t enough. I rummaged through my bag and pulled out a hoodie and jeans and changed, then decided to throw on the sneakers I had grabbed last minute too. I wasn’t sure exactly what Joel had been talking about, but I guessed I should get ready for anything.

I cracked open the door and noticed the sun had started rising outside. My stiff back and the new light confirmed that I had actually slept for quite a while. I turned to look at Freddy only to find him already turned over looking at me.

“Hey, sleepyhead,” I greeted. “Joel and Tommy aren’t here yet, hopefully soon.”

I looked back out, but when I didn’t hear a response from Freddy I turned back to him. He was still looking at me, but his eyes seemed different. I couldn’t tell if there was something wrong or if it was just from the dim light of the lamp we had on in the corner of the room.

“Freddy?” I stepped closer. “You okay?”

He moaned, his mouth opening at a weird angle, then his body twitched under the blankets. I jumped back.

“Freddy, what the fuck?!” I pushed the door open so I could keep putting space between us.

He leapt out of the bed faster than I had seen him move since before he got sick. I bolted for the door to the stairs and got out just before he got to me. I slammed the door and locked it, racing up the stairs as fast as I could while the door was getting smashed to pieces behind me.

I got up to the kitchen and paused, panting, trying to get my brain to stop spinning just enough to come up with a plan. My heart was pounding almost too loud to hear the door get obliterated as Freddy finally busted out. I ran to the stairs leading up to my room and climbed them as fast as I could. I was almost to the top when I was grabbed from behind and thrown down to the bottom. My head hit the floor hard enough to cause my vision to spin for a moment before settling on Freddy at the top of the stairs.

I didn’t recognize the thing that used to be my brother. My entire body ached and was frozen in fear as he came down the stairs and hovered over me. He screamed and moved toward me just as the front door was kicked in. The sound of a gunshot rang through my ears and I watched as Freddy’s blood splattered against the wall beside us. I turned to see Joel holding the gun, blood covering his hands, arms, torso, and face, as he stalked toward Freddy, who was still standing somehow and screaming at Joel.

Tommy rushed in and ran to my side, helping me off the floor. I limped beside him as he pulled me toward the front door. Before we left completely I turned to Joel.

“(Y/N)!” Tommy called.

“No!” I screamed at the same time as Joel pulled the trigger.

I watched as Freddy’s face was completely blown off and painted across the wall behind him. His body fell limp, and thudded onto the wood flooring. Tommy wrapped his arms around me and pulled me out of the house as I screamed and cried. My ears were ringing so hard I couldn’t even hear myself.

Joel turned around to face me, and the grief that was held in his eyes was enough for me to go limp in Tommy’s arms as he dragged me out to a car that they had running in the driveway.

“Tommy,” I managed to get out through my tears. “Tommy, who’s blood is that? On Joel? Who’s blood is that, Tommy?”

He helped me into the backseat, refusing to make eye contact.

I shook my head. “No, no, no, not hers. It can’t be.”

Tommy looked up at me, and I saw the answer in his face.

2004

“Joel?”

Tommy was still sound asleep in the passenger seat of our broken down truck, but I had been awoken from where I had been sleeping in the backseat by someone crying. The driver's seat, which had been occupied by Joel, was empty.

I opened the door and shuffled out quietly so I wouldn’t wake Tommy. My legs bent so I was lower to the ground just in case we weren’t alone, but a quick check around helped me see we were. I stood to my full height and searched for Joel.

Another sob broke through the night and I followed the sound to the edge of the woods. There, sitting against the trunk of a tree just out of sight from the truck, was Joel. He was hunched over himself, with his arms wrapped around his legs and his head hung down. His shoulders shook with the force of his tears, and all I wanted to do in that moment was wrap myself around him and protect him from the world.

“Joel?” I whispered, trying not to startle him.

He lifted his head and turned to face me. His eyes were bloodshot and puffy, and he looked exhausted.

“I-I’m sorry,” he stuttered, his voice absolutely wrecked. “I didn’t wake you did I?”

I shook my head. “No, you didn’t. I was already awake,” I lied. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, I’m fine.” I wasn’t the only one lying. “Just couldn’t sleep.”

I gestured to the spot on the ground, asking silent permission, and he nodded. It felt nice to sit next to him, his body warm compared to the hard earth underneath us. We sat for a moment in silence, though it wasn’t uncomfortable.

“I can’t stop seein’ her in my arms,” he said so softly into the night. “I close my eyes and it’s like a horror movie, this nightmare permanently playing behind my eyelids.”

“I know what you mean.” Joel and Tommy dealt with my nightmares for months, and even after they still knew to wake me before the screaming started in case I gave us away.

I leaned over and rested my head on Joel’s shoulder, and he rested his head on top of mine. I placed my hand on his knee, causing him to stiffen for a moment. Because of his reaction I pulled my hand away, only to have him reach out and grab my wrist. He clasped his hand in mine on his thigh and intertwined our fingers. I rubbed the back of his hand with my thumb and sighed.

The two of us sat out by that tree for the rest of the night, not saying anything, but understanding everything.

2006

“She just gets it,” Joel grumbled.

“And I don't?”

I stared at Joel who was refusing to look at me even though I had him cornered in his bedroom.

“You think I don’t get it? This loss that you’ve been dealing with? This fear?” I continued, hoping he’d at least look at me. “I watched you shoot my brother for fuck sake!”

He finally looked at me. It was the first time since I had caught him kissing Tess just moments ago in the place where he was standing.

“I’m sorry,” he said, his voice so low if I hadn’t seen his lips move I wouldn’t have thought he said a thing.

I shook my head. “I’m leaving, Joel.”

He furrowed his brows, taking a step toward me. I took one back.

“I can’t do this. All I’ve wanted was for you to let me in, especially since Tommy left. Now it’s just you and Tess. There’s no room for me anymore.” I turned to walk away but he reached out and grabbed my upper arm.

“Don’t, please,” he pleaded with me. “You can’t, you won’t make it. Where will you even go?”

I wrenched my arm out of his grip. “I’m going to find Tommy.”

“Please,” he whispered.

“Fuck you, Joel.” I snarled.

I slammed his door behind me and took off, hoping I’d never lay eyes on Joel Miller ever again.

2023

There was news of newcomers in Jackson, although the rumour was they weren’t staying long. I was still intrigued, since it wasn’t often Tommy accepted people in so easily when they weren’t in dire need of assistance. People were saying they were just passing through.

I wanted to know who would pass through freely without wanting to stay, and who Tommy would allow to come and go so easily. I should have stayed curious. Instead, I decided to check out who the fuss was all about.

What I wasn’t expecting was to see Joel traveling with a young girl. I walked into Tommy’s office expecting to greet strangers, only to be face to face with the one man I never thought I’d see again. Had hoped I would never see again. Had wished late at night, when my only company was my thoughts, that I would one day see again.

“Joel?” I asked, the shock on my face was enough to make Tommy chuckle.

Joel whipped around at the sound of my voice and his face looked like he saw a ghost. He looked good, but different. Broader, grayer, rougher around the edges. But he still looked tired and saddled with grief.

“(Y/N),” he said matter of factly, as if he was just stating that I was there in case he didn’t believe it.

We stood frozen in the moment, the air electric between us. The young girl’s eyes flickered back and forth until she stepped forward offering her hand to me.

“I’m Ellie,” she smiled as if she was harmless but I saw the mischievous twinkle in her eye.

I shook her hand. “It’s nice to meet you, Ellie.”

“I can’t believe you found Tommy.” Joel spoke again, his voice rougher than before but still him. “I thought I would never see you again.”

I shrugged. “Would that have been such a bad thing?”

Joel’s eyes darkened, his mouth set in a line. Tommy cleared his throat and explained what they were doing in Jackson. I was told that Joel would be taking Ellie to a firefly base. That Ellie was like cargo.

“She’s cargo?” I asked. “Why?”

“Long story,” Joel cut in, glaring at Tommy for telling me anything about their plans. “We’re headin’ out soon.”

“Where’s Tess?” I asked before thinking, even though I had a feeling.

Joel turned away from me completely. Tommy looked at me and I knew. My mouth formed a silent O. I felt bad, obviously. I really did like Tess even though Joel had chosen her instead of me. That wasn’t her fault and she was a strong willed woman who was full of heart. But I was also aware of the dangers that remained in the world, and the horrors that some people just couldn’t escape. No matter how tough they were.

Maria came in with some food for our guests. “Tommy there’s a commotion outside, you might wanna go deal with it.”

“Alright, I’ll be back in a bit.” Tommy grabbed his jacket and started to head out the door.

Joel took one look at me before reaching out to stop Tommy. “I’ll come with you, just in case you need some back up.”

Tommy laughed and shook his head. “Always the big brother, aren’t you?”

The two men walked out the room and left us alone. Maria was looking at me with her eyebrow raised.

“What?”

She narrowed her eyes at me. “I won’t get into it, especially in front of Ellie, but you know what.”

Tommy was no fool, he knew how I felt about Joel, and he shared everything with Maria.

“Into what?” Ellie asked, looking between the two of us.

“Nothing,” I muttered. “You should eat, Ellie.”

They sat down to eat while I went to leave. Maria got up and walked over placing her hand on my shoulder. “Why don’t you stay? Talk to us for a bit. Then you can say goodbye to Joel before they head out again.”

The way she was looking at me told me I should stay, that he may not be back. I lowered my eyes.

“I don’t think that’s the best idea.” I called out, “it was nice meeting you, Ellie!” Then headed back to my house.

I had already said goodbye to Joel Miller years ago, I certainly didn’t need to again.

2024

He was back. Word traveled fast, and I made sure to stay hidden away. I was surprised that he had not only made it to his destination, but he also made it back. He had the girl with him too.

I was supposed to be on patrol that day but decided to get someone to cover me. There was no way I could even leave my house for fear that I may see him. When I told Maria she just shook her head and dismissed me, probably thinking I was no better than a child instead of a woman in her forties.

Not even a day went by before there was a knock at my door. My hands shook and my stomach was doing flips the entire walk to where my visitor waited, and when I opened the door I felt my heart stop.

“Joel,” I breathed.

“Hi, (Y/N).” His broad shoulders took up most of the light coming in through the doorway, and his face remained stoic through the relief in his voice.

“You made it.”

He nodded, a man of few words.

I stepped back, allowing him through the doorway. He made his way inside the living room and wandered around, looking at the pictures and knick knacks I collected throughout my time in Jackson. He came to a stop in front of a picture of a paint mare looking out at the desert landscape.

“She’s beautiful, isn’t she?” I asked, coming to stand next to him. His arms were crossed over his chest, the same as mine were, and when he shuffled to one side we bumped elbows, causing us both to stiffen.

“What’re you doing here, Joel?”

He sighed, turning to walk toward the couch, though he did not sit down. “Ellie and I are gonna stay in Jackson. Live here.”

“That’s not what I mean and you know it.” I walked to the kitchen and grabbed two glasses. “Still a whiskey man, I take it?”

He grunted in response as I poured two fingers each.

“I don’t have a lot to offer, but I raided an old shop about a month ago and found some liquor. I’m shocked it wasn’t claimed but I know better than to ask questions.” I put the jar of the amber liquid back in my cupboard and walked to where he was finally seated on the couch. “You’re lucky I’m even offering you some, I’d like to save it.”

“Well, thanks.” He took a sip and relaxed back into the cushions. His eyes closed almost involuntarily as soon as the alcohol touched his lips. He drained his cup and leaned forward to set it on the table.

“I was assuming you’d savor that a bit more but okay.” I shrugged and took a sip of my own drink.

“I fucked up.” He said, his elbows on his knees and his head in his hands. “With Ellie. I fucked up really bad.”

I went and sat beside him, placing my glass down next to his. “I’m sure it’s not as bad as you think, Joel. What happened?”

“I can’t tell you. Not yet, anyway.” He scrubbed his hands down his face, then turned to me. I could see the exhaustion in his eyes, hanging off his shoulders. “I’m just so tired of tryin’ to keep my head down and survive, only to mess things up and hurt other people. People I genuinely care about.”

“Is Ellie okay?” I was concerned, especially since I wasn’t exactly sure what happened to Tess.

“Yeah. Yeah, she’s fine.”

“Then that’s all that matters for right now.” I placed my hand on his knee and he melted into my touch. “You both survived, and you’re here now. You’re safe.”

Joel’s shoulders trembled, and I could tell he was holding everything in. I wrapped my arms around him and pulled him close so his face was buried in my neck. He still didn’t let himself cry, but he let himself be held and that was good enough for me. For the both of us.

“Where’s Ellie now?” I whispered against his graying hair, scared of breaking the spell cast over us.

“She’s staying at Tommy and Maria’s. They have a room for the both of us, but I told them I was comin’ to see you first.” His voice vibrated against my neck, sending shivers down to my toes.

I rubbed my hand up his back and down again, repeating the motion until we had fully relaxed against each other. Eventually the room darkened as the sun set, and I pulled away from him. I stood and offered my hand out to him. He raised his eyebrow at me but slid his hand in mine, standing to his full height. We walked silently to my bedroom and I left him standing on one side of the bed so I could make my way to the other.

“(Y/N)?” He seemed so shy, so nervous. Not at all like the Joel I used to know before the outbreak.

“Just get in, Joel. You look exhausted.”

He sighed and did as I asked. Luckily he looked like he had showered and put on some of Tommy’s clean clothes before he visited. So I wasn’t worried about him getting my bed dirty. I chuckled at the fact that he didn’t take off his jeans, causing him to roll his eyes and slide them off under the blankets.

I went into my bathroom to put my hair up and change into a t-shirt and sleep shorts, and was pleased to see that Joel had taken off his flannel shirt so he was also in a t-shirt. I slid under the covers with him, and we laid side by side in the dark. It was awkward at first, until I rolled to face him and scooted closer.

“Hi,” I said.

He turned his head to look at me. “Hi.”

I smiled, causing him to mirror my actions. He stretched his arm up, helping me maneuver my head so he was my cushion, and he pulled me close. We fell asleep with our arms around each other, feeling like we hadn’t been apart for as long as we were.

The sun started to shine through my curtains in the early morning, causing my eyes to blink open. My back was facing Joel and his arm was still in the same place as before, his other draped over my waist. I felt at peace for the first time since the outbreak, and probably since before then too. For a moment I wondered if that’s what I had been missing all those years, if that was what it would have been like if Joel had let me in sooner. If I had admitted my feelings to him sooner.

He groaned and pressed himself against me. “Mornin’,” he said, sleep heavy in his voice.

“Morning.” I turned in his arms so I could watch him. His eyes were closed but the bags that hung down from them the night before seemed to not be as deep.

When Joel opened his eyes I felt my breath catch in my throat. The deep pools of them threatened to pull me under if I let them. And I wanted to let them so bad.

“Why are you here, Joel?” I asked. “What do you want?”

He sighed, his eyes flickering down to my lips before coming back to mine. Butterflies erupted in my stomach yet again.

I asked once more. “What do you want, Joel?”

“You.”

I didn’t even realize we had moved toward each other until our lips connected. His hand that was on my back came up to cradle the back of my head, moving me how he needed so our angle worked better.

His body weighed me down, keeping me grounded, as he slowly moved over top of me. My hands went into his hair, tugging him closer, causing him to moan in my mouth. I slid my hands down to his back and he pulled away so he could grab them and place them above my head. He kissed his way down my neck and chest, then helped me sit up so he could remove my shirt. The cool air caused goosebumps on my skin and pebbled my now exposed nipples, but he wasn’t looking anywhere but in my eyes.

“Is this okay? We can stop.”

I shook my head and pulled him in for a kiss. “Don’t you dare, Joel Miller.”

He smiled against my lips, kissing me once more before making his way back down my body. He pulled one of my nipples into his mouth, teasing the bud with his teeth, and then moved to the next one, repeating his actions. I moaned and writhed under his ministrations, wishing he’d move faster.

Joel’s lips mapped their way down my stomach, to my lower abdomen, and then skipped over my shorts to plant kisses on my thighs. His calloused hands slid up and down my calves, the heat from them warming my blood, a blush forming on my chest. He slid his hands up the inside of my thighs, and his thumbs brushed over where my shorts were covering my core. I bucked my hips slightly, making him hold me down.

“Patience, darlin’,” he drawled against my inner thigh. “Let’s get these off of you before they get ruined.”

I lifted my hips as he slid my shorts down my legs and threw them onto the floor, exposing me fully. My thighs tried to close but his strong hands pried them open.

“Let me see you, sweetheart. There we go.” He flattened himself onto the bed and gripped my hips with his arms, pinning me in place. “You’re so beautiful.”

His tongue parted my lips and swirled around my clit. His fingers brushed against my opening before he sunk one inside. I groaned at the feeling, his fingers thicker than mine, and they reached where I certainly couldn’t. My whole body felt like it was on fire as he made out with my clit, sucking it into his mouth and pressing the flat of his tongue against it.

“Joel,” I moaned into the air. He hummed against me, the vibrations making my eyes roll back. I gripped the sheets, feeling my orgasm approaching like a runaway train.

He slid another finger in, lowering his head so his tongue fucked into me between his fingers and his nose rubbed against my clit. The sounds were filthy as they reached my ears, and it took no time at all for my pleasure to rip through me. His name was a prayer that spilled from my lips over and over until my body melted against the bed.

I pushed his head out from between my legs, the sensitivity suddenly too much, and pulled him up so I could kiss him. The taste of me mixed with the smell of him was to die for, and we moaned into each other's mouths.

“I need you,” he panted once we broke apart. “I’ve needed you for so long.”

“I know,” I kissed him, “I know. I need you, too. I’ve needed you since I first met you.”

“Fuck, darlin’. You’re gonna be the death of me.”

I helped him out of his clothes, tracing over the scars that littered his torso and making him whine into my mouth when I stroked his cock slowly. It hardened even more under my touch, and precum beaded from the tip when I teased it over my soaking wet core.

Joel pushed himself inside slowly, so slowly I felt I would fall apart. When he was fully inside me I let my head fall back. He leaned down and kissed my neck, just behind my ear, and nipped the skin.

“Joel, I need you,” I nearly sobbed, using my hands to try and pull him even closer.

“I got you, sweetheart, I got you.” He buried his face even deeper into my neck and held me so close he was barely pulling out of me.

We moved together, moaned together, and finally, with a little help from his fingers wedged between us, we came together. Our names mingled with our breaths, and then we held each other in the fresh light of the new morning.

He held me in his arms, my back to his front, and he whispered sweet nothings into my ear until I felt sleep pull me under once more. After a little while there was a shift in the bed that caused me to start waking up again. My eyes opened when I realized Joel’s warmth was no longer behind me, and I sat up to see where he would be. His clothes weren’t on the floor, even his jeans and flannel, and there wasn’t any sound from the bathroom. My heart sank the more I realized where he was.

My worries were confirmed as I heard my front door close in the distance.

[hisonlyreid-er]

Unhomely

Summary: Spencer decides to drive home and visit old friends in Vegas but ends up questioning himself.

Content: Hurt Spencer/ Comforting reader, a little angst, some fluff

This was inspired by " A view between villages" By Noah Kahan so I suggest you listen to it and the rest of his music. :)

“You cannot protect yourself from sadness without protecting yourself from happiness.”

Spencer hated going back home. he never gave an exact reason but it was easy to see that he never had a great childhood and he linked Vegas with those experiences. Every time there was a case in Vegas he would always tense up and be a little more explosive on those days. You couldn't blame him though, you knew the ins and outs of the bullying, mistreatment and neglect he suffered at the hands of his so-called community when he was younger.

That was why, when Spencer told you he was planning to drive up there, you offered to take time off work and go with him as support. He wanted to go alone. Maybe it was to face his demons or maybe he didn't want you to see him so vulnerable. You gave him to space to pack and helped him move his bag into the back of the car. A small kiss on the cheek and a hug goodbye was your parting gifts as he got in the car and started the long drive.

Spencer had been driving for hours now, and from the looks of things, he was only about 30 minutes from his home}. A feeling in his chest began to stir, it felt like a weight was pressing down on him. His mind felt heavier, the past refilling the empty container it had once vacated. His breaths came in quick succession as the images of the faces that taunted him filled his view. However, even in his state, Spencer could see how dangerous it was to keep driving and pulled over the next chance he got. Shaking hands reached across to the passenger seat and fumbled in an attempt to grab his phone. Once his fingers wrapped around it, he pulled it towards him and sped to unlock it. The images weren't fading and the glassy coat over his eyes was threatening to fall. His fingers tapped at the screen forcefully and he hit dial on you number. After turning the call to speaker, Spencer set the phone downs and pressed his head against the head rest with closed eyes. The ringing only lasted a few moments before you picked up.

" Hey Spencer, did you get to your hotel?" The question was so simple but your voice alone began to calm the tidal wave of panic washing over him.

"N-No, not just yet, I'm taking a quick break at the side of the road." His answer sounded strained as he attempted to regulate his sharp breaths. You knew something wasn't right but you also trusted Spencer and knew if he wanted you to know, he would tell you.

"How far out are you?" Knowing that for the amount of time he had been driving meant that he should be pretty much there by now. "Only round 5 minutes until I should be near the house." His voice broke as the last few words almost as if it pained him to admit he's almost there. With the comfort of knowing you were there, Spencer decided to carry on driving while still on the phone. The car began to move and stayed well below the speed limit like he was trying to drag out the drive.

You had begun rambling about a random book to fill the silence, not in fear that it was awkward but in fear that the silence means that he has too much time with his thought. " Where are you now Spence?" He hesitated. " I've just gone over the bridge , so only a few more minutes." There was something about the way he spoke that just screamed to you. Just as you were about the speak again, Spencer's voice ripped through the phone. He was stumbling over his words but it was clear he wanted you to know. " Being back here, everything is just coming back to me. I thought I remembered everything but there are so many things that I forgot. That I chose to forget." He takes a heavy breath. "I'm remembering the faces of all the kids who made my like hell on earth, the way my dad left, the way my mom... Everything I wanted to never think of again had resurfaced and I want it to stop. It infuriates me that I cant stop it." His voice doesn't sound scared anymore it sounds furious. " And being back in this place, every face surrounding me. Every place taunting me. I don't think I can do it."

Now it was your chance to speak. " Spencer listen to me. You can do this, because your stronger than you were back then, they cant hurt you anymore. Remembering isn't a bad thing. Its proof you survived that and became a better person than all those bullies. You can carry on, I know you can. Trust me Spence. I love you and I believe in you." He wasn't sure how you did it, but your words reassured his enough that he didn't feel the urge to turn around completely. The confidence meant that he carried on all the door of his old home, he carried on through the door, he carried on through the house to each room.

It amazed Spencer how you alone managed to calm him enough that he pushed further than he thought he could. He relied on you and he didn't care. There was no shame in it. In fact, he's proud that he found you. Spencer never wanted to hide from you, never wanted to hide his sadness from you because both of you were in this together. Swimming together against the harsh waves that tried to rip you apart.

I wanted to just thank you guys for liking my other posts. I didn't expect so many people to interact with my little stories. I would also love if anyone wanted to make any suggestions for stories you would love to see.

[thewolvesof1998]

Temptation Tuesday

Not tagged by anyone but I just need to talk about these ideas, they’re haunting me okay.

I'm currently working on an MMA Rivals AU and Rodeo/Bull Riding AU but I can't get these ideas out of my head:

Chef Buck AU: The bear/No reservations inspired: like can you imagine Buck in his chef whites saying "Yes Chef" to Eddie while looking up at him through his eyelashes, smirk pulling at his lips because I can and it haunts me.

Ted Lasso AU: Football, Bobby is Ted Lasso, Buck is Jamie Tart, Eddie is Roy Kent

Eddie was in the K9 Unit in the army- When he's back state side he needs help with his dog, enter Dog trainer Evan Buckley

Body Guard Eddie - need I say more -yes- Eddie's back from his second tour, needs a job when an old buddy reaches out to him, he need someone to guard Evan Buckley (Actor? Son of a rich man? Politician?) A mix between The Bodyguard/Bodyguard

AU where Buck and Eddie meet in the army and start sleeping together - angst, whumpage, Eddie deals with his gay crisis

Sign language Buck and Eddie -thats it

Jake/Holt = Buck/Bobby = Son/Father: 5 times Buck calls Bobby ‘Dad’, +1 time Bobby calls Buck son: “It’s funny, on my first day here, I asked Jeffords to tell me about everyone, told me you were a great detective, but the one thing you couldn’t figure out was how to grow up…Well, I think you’ve finally figured it out.”

On that note: Cops AU/Brooklyn 99 AU inspired by this:

A street racing/Fast n' Furious AU inspired by this picture: (there's already the 'Ride & Die' Series by spaceprincessem but I need moreeeeee) Specifically under cover FBI agent Eddie Diaz and Street racer Evan Buckley and its before they find out. Its mostly inspired by this picture: (Like imagine Buck's in the passenger seat)

And lastly a Mafia AU: I mean just look at these images, I have no thoughts just vibes but like god damn, are they the two mafia husbands or are they rivals/star cross lovers I don't know but i love them:

This is not including the half-dozen song-inspired fics I have- mostly it's Noah Kahan but 'Let's Ruin the Friendship' is such a Buddie song.

[morax-on-my-mind]

:･ﾟ✧:･ﾟ✧ Zhongli x Wander ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ:

➵ shape of love by passenger, boy and bear

➵ if we were vampires by noah kahan (ft. wesley shultz)

➵ novels by rusty clanton

it was nothing more than a friendship at first, casual walks during the day, discussions at Third-Round Knockout with tea and bamboo shoot soup, flowers were always exchanged, people noticed a change in the two of them one day, they stood closer, gazed longer, hardly separated for a moment, there were whispers they would leave liyue harbor for awhile - "Where would you like to go? Our journey is just beginning..." rings of metal were on each of their left hands, promises to never leave without the other, calling her dearest, beloved, my lily, from a certain GEO LORD funeral consultant

Inspired by @mydiluc

[valiantlyjollynightmare]

Passengers - Day 1

Chapter 1: Once Upon A Time Never Happens

Read on ao3 Next | Masterpost

Rating: T

Archive Warning: No Archive Warning Apply

Category: F/M

Fandom: Miraculous Ladybug

Relationships: Adrien Agreste/Marinette Dupain-Cheng, background DjWifi

Characters: Adrien Agreste, Marinette Dupain-Cheng, Tikki, Plagg, Alya Cesaire, Nino Lahiffe Tom Dupain, Sabine Cheng

Aditional Tags: Alternate Universe - Road Trip, Aged Up, university aged, post Final Battle, post-reveal, Pre-Relationship, everyone knows who they are, prpr, Happy Ending, Sharing a Bed, and there was only one bed, Nightmares, Pining, Slow Burn, but just because the author likes to write many words, the whole action actually doesn't span such a long period of time, Fluff, hurt-comfort, Guilt, Introspection, tipsy shenanigans, Lavender Fields, Flower Crowns, author overusing google maps, Provence, Makeovers, glasses adrien, identity shenanigans, Inspired by Music, france is an amazing country, Canon-Compliant, Like, I did my best so it doesn't directly disagree with the canon but this is still aged up, Angst, at the beginning, @mlbigbang

Betas: @miabrown007, @silvmoonsky, myimaginationflows

Art by: @vivifx (instagram, twitter) and @lukalunar (instagram).

Thank you so much, guys!!!! You've been an absolute wonder to work with!!! I appreciate you so so so much!!! Your input and feedback always always made my day and definitely definitely made this fic better!!!

And special thanks to Mia and @fragileizy without whom this fic would definitely not be as good! Thank you so much for listening to me and helping me whenever I got stuck! You're the best!

Playlist: YouTube, Spotify (I recommend the YouTube one, because certain songs might not be available everywhere)

Work Title Song: Passenger by Noah Kahan (YT, Spotify) (please at least listen to this one!!!!)

Chapter Title Song: Eyes Wide by Magic Giant (YT, Spotify)

When all was said and done, Marinette saw Adrien break down and she let herself cry with him. His father was behind bars, his mother was in a hospital bed, and he was left picking up the pieces.

Marinette was right there with him.

It took them a couple of days to settle down and make sure Emilie was well cared for. For her to make sure Adrien left the hospital every once in a while, and that he knew he didn't have to ever step foot into the mansion again if he didn’t want to — that he knew her home was also his.

He insisted on going back to the mansion every night.

To make sure it was ready to welcome his mother, he'd said.

“Make sure I'm not even more of a burden”, Marinette understood.

She’d resolved to try harder then, but Gabriel — Hawk Moth — had turned Adrien’s self-esteem and confidence into crumbs of what should've been, broken pieces making up a puzzle Marinette had decided to glue back together with love, care, and patience.

She didn't want to force love onto him, but she kept her arms wide open so he knew she could always share a bit of her warmth when his life felt too cold.

He was hesitant, always so hesitant. But with every passing day, he spent more time with her rather than alone in the mansion or running over rooftops — too fast for anyone to keep up — burning away an energy that fed on stress, and pain, and overthinking.

But the more weeks passed, the more Marinette felt herself go insane. After dealing with the university, the media, the public, the authorities, the Guardians, and everything in-between, studying the grimoire should’ve been the easiest task. Especially since now she had Adrien right beside her. But he was too quiet, the world too loud, and the tiredness too heavy.

Whenever she tried to imagine how much worse it was for him, her mind drew to a painful blank. It’d slowly made her priorities shift to an upside-down kind of mess that had him at the top and his mother somewhere second, her own well-being coming as a natural consequence to his own.

Pushing away the plethora of notes she'd made, she turned her eyes to the boy she so desperately wanted to help but didn't quite know how to yet. He was sitting cross-legged on the floor, in the middle of too many papers and notes, looking back and forth between a copied page from the grimoire and a file with the decoded script. He didn't seem to realize — or to care about — how tired he looked, how frail and small.

Marinette was grateful he'd finally moved most of his study materials at her place. She was glad he spent less time cooped alone in his too big room, battling both the grimoire's secrets and his monsters.

But she also realized they'd both go insane if they kept going like that.

She rose up and went to sit in front of him, though the papers were an uncrossable barrier between them. So Marinette started putting them away, carefully, paying attention to keep them in the same order he'd arranged them into.

Her slow progress didn’t lessen her determination.

"Let's take a break," she said, eyes on the organized mess in front of her. Adrien didn't protest as she kept picking them up and stacking them neatly, one above another.

"I can't figure out this page," he said instead, his voice a breath away from trembling with frustration and exhaustion.

He hadn't been sleeping well, he hadn't been eating well, he hadn't been feeling well. Adrien hadn't been well and she couldn't let that go on any longer.

"We will," she said, finally raising her eyes to look at him and trying a small smile. "But we're both too tired and stressed out to solve anything right now."

She spotted Plagg behind Adrien, looking at her with a serious expression, but the nod he gave her told Marinette she was right. They were in no condition to be heroes at the moment.

The second everything had settled into an illusion of peace after Hawk Moth’s downfall, the two of them had started pouring themselves into finding a solution for the one problem justice couldn't solve. Adrien's mother didn't need Gabriel and Nathalie behind bars to be fine; Paris did. Emilie needed magic, but magic was too tricky to simply get rid of a problem.

Hawk Moth had been dead set on wishing the problem away. That wasn't going to work. But Marinette and Adrien were dead set on creating a cure anyway.

Although, with the way everything had gone down, they barely had the energy to find solutions. The doctors were too eager for clarifications, the media too eager for answers, and even Marinette's parents — too eager to help.

And their professors hadn’t quite cared about their personal problems when the time for final exams came around.

A reveal — a final battle — had not been in their plans, but it happened. And they had to deal with it even though they wished they could leave it all behind to just breathe for a second.

"Let's get away from this for a few days," she finally continued, eyes never leaving Adrien's red-rimmed ones. She saw him drawing in a breath to refute her idea, but didn't give him the chance to.

"Let's get away, let’s leave. We’ve been taking care of everything but us lately. We’re not doing anyone any service if we go on like this."

"But mother needs—”

"She’s in a stable condition," Marinette interrupted him, resisting the urge to grab him and shake some sense into him. He had to take care of himself too, not just everyone else. "She's stable and she's not going anywhere. She's been like that for the past few years, a couple more days won't make any difference for her. But we could use them, Chaton." She almost begged him to understand. "We're dead on our feet, we're not even seeing the words on these papers anymore. We aren't of any help like this."

"If we get Alya and the rest to help—"

"We still won't be of any help. Not even Alya knows as much as we do; imagine gathering everyone and explaining everything. It’d take us too long. Alya is at least familiar with my old notes, and she’d been here pretty often. She knows how we went about the Wish and the Peacock, she’ll be able to notice if we missed something or got anything wrong. Every time she’s come here to help, she ended up fixing our messes, anyway, rather than finding anything new. Yesterday, she saw I'd translated the same page twice. Differently," she emphasized, dragging a hand over her face, only to let it fall back into her lap and start fiddling with her fingers. "You put your good notes in the trash and she only noticed because you were about to throw some more in there. We can't go on like this."

“We wouldn’t be having as many problems if the Guardians helped,” he said bitterly.

Marinette understood his frustration. She’d fought tooth and nail for their help, right beside him, but they were too set on respecting their old rules. Risking the delicate balance that’d been created — especially for someone who’d played with the powers of the Miraculouses and now had to bear the consequences — was not permitted.

The most she and Adrien got was the recognition of her authority as a Guardian herself and the permission to carry on their search for a cure on their own.

Thinking any more about it wasn’t worth more energy than they’d already wasted, so Marinette

only shrugged in response, resigned.

"People will talk. This would blow out of proportions," he insisted with a frown, and Marinette shook her head.

"People don’t need to know. We still don’t owe them anything about our private lives — not when the reveal happened, and definitely not now. We aren’t celebrities, we’re public servants,” she spat, but the fervour in her voice wasn’t fueled by bitterness. “They’re finally starting to get that; they aren’t hunting us like they did at the beginning anymore. They’ve finally calmed down a bit, so we can slip away for a couple of days."

“We have that interview soon,” he insisted, as if that proved his point.

“And we’re not going there to talk about our personal plans. We go, we tell our piece and then we leave.”

Since the reveal, they’d worked effortlessly to make everyone understand that they had certain boundaries they expected not to be crossed, especially involving their civilian identities. In the beginning, no one seemed to make any difference between their civilian-selves and their hero-selves anymore. Not only paparazzi, but respectable news stations kept breathing down their necks at any given moment, and fans didn’t hesitate to flock to them whenever they saw them in public. It’d been a nightmare.

And now, months later, it was still a work in progress, but they’d been trying to make sure it was clear what kind of journalists they’d be working with. Though, simply asking for respect seemed to be a bit too much for a bit too many.

He watched her with tired eyes, but he wasn't protesting anymore.

"Hear me out,” she tried again. “We let Alya come here, we let her look through everything we have, but we take a break. And when we come back, we dive right back in and fix this."

Adrien leaned forward and let his head fall on her shoulder. He was a little too far away for it to be even remotely comfortable for either of them, but neither cared.

"Where would we even go?" His voice was small and as tired as his eyes.

"Away. I don't know. We hop in the car and drive out of Paris. We know where to return."

He tried to protest longer, but Marinette had too many arguments and too few fucks left to give about anything other than him, him, always him. When he finally nodded, Marinette counted it as a small victory.

***

"I'll be careful," Alya promised the night before they were to leave, expression serious as Marinette and Adrien showed her how they'd organized their small progresses.

Alya already knew.

She let them talk their frustration and worries away, anyway.

Marinette was grateful for that.

***

“Where should we go?” Adrien asked after Alya left.

Side by side, they were on her balcony, leaning against its railing and watching the world below live.

They hadn’t quite talked about it. “We’d leave”, they’d agreed, and for two days straight, focused on arranging matters with the team and the press.

Their teammates had been even more supportive than Marinette had expected. They’d promised to take care of anything that might arise and keep the media as unaware as possible of their trip.

The news station was even more eager to work with them. The press didn’t need to know that having to pour more energy than usual into organizing an interview was a welcomed distraction. Thinking about how to deal with an onslaught of questions meant not thinking about breaking free — and everything that involved.

Sometimes it was useful that people wanted to know more. They’d been catching glimpses of their life and tried to arrange the pieces in an image bigger than they made. After revealed identities, and screams, and fury, came broken hugs and blank faces, and outsiders couldn’t always make sense of everything. When they turned to the heroes for answers, Ladybug and Chat Noir’s professionalism never quite cut it either. So the questions always came pouring in.

It hadn’t helped that until they’d been done with their exams, they’d barely had time for more than an official statement and a few short interviews. School had made for a good excuse to use on the journalists that insisted too much.

This time, the interview was an excuse in itself, so they didn’t have to think about a destination, or an itinerary, or backing down.

Then, there was also the visit they’d arranged at the hospital.

Adrien couldn’t accept that he’d leave his mother behind in order to have fun. It felt wrong even to Marinette, though she couldn’t really imagine the pain he was going through. But she knew that, in the long run, a break could help more than however many other hours spent hunched over the grimoire or hiding in their houses.

A quick call was enough to set up an early check-in with Emilie Agreste and her doctor between their interview and their departure. Adrien checked in on his mother weekly, but seeing her unchanged state didn’t make him less worried. Marinette hoped it’d at least ease his mind enough so that he could allow himself some freedom.

She was fairly certain Adrien hadn’t even fully processed the idea of their going away until it came so close that he had to make himself think about it.

He had yet to back down, though. She liked to think it was a good sign.

“We could go anywhere,” Marinette said instead of answering his initial question. She tried to gauge his openness to a longer trip. The only thing they actually knew about it was that they were supposed to leave the next afternoon.

He seemed to think about what she said for a pretty long time.

“I don’t know where to go,” he finally responded.

Marinette chanced a look at him. He was still looking down, at the people walking from shadow to shadow, from streetlight to streetlight; he wasn’t smiling, he wasn’t frowning, he was just looking.

She had the vague sensation he was talking about more than the trip.

The bags under his eyes cast deep shadows on his face in the poor light.

“How much have you been sleeping?”

He shrugged and finally looked at her with a curious expression. It must’ve seemed unrelated to their trip.

“I don’t know. Enough.”

She shook her head at him.

“Definitely not enough.”

“Well, that’s why we’re doing this, right? So we can relax for a bit.”

“Yeah,” Marinette answered with a nod, turning her head back to the street below. She bit her lip and hesitated. Then, voiced the idea she’d been playing with ever since she’d suggested going for a trip. “How do you feel about going to Provence? Maybe all that lavender will help us get a good night’s sleep.” She laughed, but she was only half joking.

She was stressed too, but Adrien wasn’t taking care of himself. She hoped that going far, far away would let him forget a bit about everything; the lavender she kept on her balcony had given her the idea. After all, lavender was supposed to help — at least with the sleeping. She was ready to take anything into consideration.

He didn’t take her idea as well as she would’ve liked.

“That’s way too far, Marinette,” he said, frowning at her. Then, Turning his eyes back over the railing, he started playing with his fingers. “Maybe we should go East instead. Or North. Spend a day or two on the beach and come back.”

“That could barely be called a get-away. Don’t you want a real road trip? Going far, far away, and finding a remote village, and getting lost because we can’t read maps?”

That got a small laugh out of him; Marinette was proud of her achievement.

“Everyone can read the line on the GPS.”

“No,” Marinette protested vehemently, drawing the ‘o’ out. “Where’s the fun in that? We’re not using that; we’re having the real road trip experience, no GPS, no google maps. But I was just kidding, we won’t get lost. You were too good at Geography in high school.”

“Do you even have a real map?”

She beamed at him like a little kid. “I bought one today.”

“Then let’s just wait and see when we’re in the car. Take that map out, point somewhere, and go there.” He smiled at her, but his face fell pretty quickly as a new thought dawned on him. “But we need to book a hotel or something, right?”

Marinette didn't want to worry about that, so she waved a hand to dismiss his worries, too. “Neh,” she said. “We can’t not find a place to sleep. It’s just the two of us after all.”

She’d thought about booking somewhere too. She had been half-trying to think up all sorts of plans about itineraries and hotels. But then she’d realized booking would involve people knowing they were coming. And people knew about them now; they knew who they were and what they looked like. That was hard to get used to.

They just had to wing it.

But it was okay, Marinette had reassured herself, and she’d even started to get excited about it. It added to the true road trip experience.

“Plus, the less people know where we’re going, the better,” she added, as if in an afterthought, and he snickered.

“Good thing we don’t know either.”

***

The interview hadn’t been all that different from all the other interviews they’d given since the big reveal, though it always surprised Marinette what some people could understand from their interviews. Chat Noir had spent too much time disentangling the threads of conspiracies woven through his family tree.

Marinette truly admired his patience.

They were both grateful to see that the day’s interview didn’t hide more conspiracy theories, and responding to the pertinent questions from before and after wasn’t more of an emotional strain than it usually was. They understood where they were coming from, especially when most of the questions were related to Gabriel’s trial.

Everyone was doing their best, in some way or another — the heroes to give the public the assurance that the injustice done to them wasn’t being overlooked, and the reporters to ensure everyone knew as much as possible — whether Ladybug and Chat Noir liked it or not.

The only difference was in the way Chat Noir acted.

After the reveal, he’d become a lot more like Adrien in front of the cameras — subdued, calm and collected. His face was almost blank sometimes.

This time, however, he’d fidgeted more; his nervousness showed. Marinette knew that in spite of his patience, he couldn’t wait for the interview to be over so he could go to the hospital.

And when it was over, he didn’t even wait to detransform to leave for the hospital, knowing Ladybug would follow.

It was his turn to ask a myriad of questions.

Marinette truly admired the doctor’s patience, too.

***

"Don't worry about the kwamis, we'll take care of them," her mother reassured Marinette as they hugged.

She didn’t worry too much. Alya and Nino were also supposed to visit daily to make sure nothing went wrong, and if worse came to worst, Alya knew where to find the Horse Miraculous.

Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Adrien come out of the car he’d just brought closer from where he’d initially parked it. The chimes at the door jingled as he walked in.

With the doctor having reassured him that everything was still unchanged but as okay as it could be, they briefly parted ways so he could go get his car, and after getting a quick late lunch with her parents, they were all set to leave.

Marinette moved to hug her father too as Adrien stepped forward and picked up her luggage to bring it to his car.

“Take care, kids,” her father said, letting her go and catching Adrien right before he went back out the door with Marinette’s bag in tow. With the way he held the bag, her father couldn't quite get the hug she knew he wanted to go for, so he settled for an awkward pat on the back that Adrien received with a shy smile.

Her mother didn't let such a small thing as Marinette’s luggage stop her from showing Adrien all the love she could shower him in. She gave him a hug that looked even warmer than the one she gave Marinette.

“Don’t forget to call us every now and then,” her father said, turning to get a bag full of pastries he'd prepared for both of them and handing it to Marinette.

With a quick wave and a hurried reassurance that they wouldn't forget, Marinette made sure she was out the door before Adrien. Almost throwing the bag of pastries on the backseat of his car, she waited patiently beside the passenger's door until he was too distracted putting in her luggage in the trunk to pay attention to her. Then, she moved quickly and claimed the driver's seat instead.

Adrien only noticed when he came to claim the seat for himself. She saw him watching her with an exaggerated pout and she gave him the smuggest smile she could muster. Then, she turned around to pull her seat forward and fastened her seatbelt, making herself more comfortable and making it clear she wouldn't move too soon.

“I thought I was going to drive,” he said, taking the seat to her right and fastening his own seatbelt. The corner of his lips was raised in a half smile that told her he didn’t mind the change of plans all that much.

“Yeah, but last night we established you’re better at the Geography thing than I am,” she responded, going for the purse at her side. It felt quite uncomfortable, so with a groan, she undid her seatbelt and took the purse off.

Tikki had slipped out of it the moment they got inside the car and she was now watching her with an amused expression that Marinete very much did not appreciate. A quick glance at Adrien confirmed that he was sporting the very same expression. She showed him her tongue and took a map out of the purse. Then, she smacked him with it.

“Stop laughing at me. Both of you,” she pouted, starting the car. “And better start looking at that map. Or make a list with what we need to buy for the road.”

“You gonna stop somewhere first?”

“Yeah, get ourselves some snacks and stuff. Those pastries won’t last us once you get your hands on them.”

“Is that why you made me put them on the backseat?”

She grinned at him and turned the key in the contact. “Of course.”

The engine purred to life, but before Marinette could leave, Adrien stopped her.

“Wait a second then,” he said, and when Marinette turned to him with a raised eyebrow, he mirrored her earlier grin and handed her the map as he unfastened his seatbelt. Then, he rose from his seat and stretched back all the way to the bag of pastries.

When he settled back in, he held the pastries in his lap like a trophy and threw her the most childishly satisfied expression he could make.

“I’m good now,” he chirped and peaked inside the bag, wiggling his fingers like he hadn’t eaten Dupain-Cheng pastries in months. All the movement woke Plagg up, and he immediately went between their seats to peek into the bag for a cheese pastry, as eagerly as Adrien. Marinette rolled her eyes but she couldn’t help her smile.

“Seatbelt,” she told Adrien, smacking him with the map again instead of just handing it back. He hurried to grab a croissant, put it in his mouth, and only then grabbed back the map and put the seatbelt on.

And as he tried to unfold the map, Marinette realized she’d never checked how big it was.

She hadn’t expected it to be so huge when she bought it, although it made sense for it to be. It was extremely detailed and it seemed clear enough, but its size made it difficult to use in the cramped space of the car, especially since they needed to see France in all its glory to pick a destination.

They agreed quickly enough that dealing with it while the car wasn’t moving — and he wasn’t eating anything — would be a much better idea. So, as he finished his first croissant, Adrien picked up a pen and some paper he had in the glove compartment and tried, instead, to focus on the shopping list Marinette had mentioned.

By the time they parked in front of a supermarket, Adrien, Plagg, and Tikki finished three croissants, two cookies, and a danish made with camembert specifically for Plagg. The bag with the rest of the pastries had been thrown back on the backseat at Marinette’s insistence that they had to save some for later, and all they’d managed to put on the shopping list was peanuts and more cookies. And cheese. Plagg had made sure to repeat ‘cheese’ so much, he made them give up on making the list altogether.

The interview had taken more time then they’d expected. That, combined with their visit at the hospital and the quick lunch at her parents’, meant they couldn’t really afford to deal with over—enthusiastic fans if they wanted to arrive somewhere — anywhere — at a decent hour. Especially since Marinette still hoped Adrien would agree to go as far away from Paris as possible.

So before getting out of the car, they tried to conceal who they were as much as possible.

The facemasks covering the lower halves of their faces only slightly made them look like they were getting ready for a robbery. Adrien’s bucket hat helped; it hid his hair well, but it made him look absolutely ridiculous. And as Marinette let her hair fall on her back and frame her face for a final touch, they entered the supermarket already brainstorming ideas for places to go and what snacks to buy.

In the sweets aisle, they stopped to argue over the pros and cons of going to a Northern beach, and to take as many cookies and Kinders as possible.

“Beach equals vacation, right? And Normandy’s what? Two hours away? Three?” Adrien said, picking up some Buenos and moving on the next sweets he liked.

Marinette didn’t fail to notice how he wasn’t quite looking at her, choosing instead to inspect the selection of sweets, like he didn’t already know exactly what he wanted.

She threw different boxes of cookies in the cart, trying to seem as indifferent as him. “I never liked it there, too cold for a beach.”

“We can just visit around.” He shrugged and she bit her lip.

She remembered the few times she visited the area with her parents. The beach wasn't that cold, and the walks they took around still made her heart squeeze with nostalgia. But she remembered the stories her father used to tell her whenever they'd be there. And they made her heart squeeze with dread instead.

“Those parts are way too connected to wars," she finally admitted, looking at him to gauge his reaction. "I don’t really like the idea.”

Her voice was small but it made him falter as he reached for some biscuits.

“We could just visit some beaches that aren’t related to any wars. We don’t have to visit any beaches at all.”

He kept away from her and his cap was tugged low, but she could still spy a frown on his face. It mirrored her own.

“Do you really want that idea at the back of your mind, though? I don’t think that’d be too relaxing for us.”

He turned to her. Even with the mask on, his expression seemed a bit defeated.

“Yeah, you’re right,” he conceded, and, grabbing some madeleines too, he moved on with a disgruntled mumble about how he wasn’t really in the mood for sunbathing anyway.

In the beverages section, they picked up a bottle of water and went over the idea of seeing the Loire Valley.

"Too many castles," Adrien said, dropping the water in their cart. "I'm tired of luxury."

Both came to a tacit understanding that the idea would be dropped in favour of another, whichever it’d be.

And as they moved to the bakery area, Marinette took a deep breath and suggested, once again, going South.

“It’s peak lavender season,” she said while dragging Adrien away from the pastries. He was eyeing them as if he didn’t have two more left in the car.

He looked at her with sad, kitten eyes, and Marinette let him go wild.

“But the lavender is ten hours away,” he said, picking up some more croissants and dropping them in the cart with a satisfied expression.

“Only eight.”

She moved on to the section right across and crouched down to inspect a lower shelf, but her attention remained focused on him as he followed her. He leaned against the shopping cart, and neither his mask, nor his hat hid the eyebrow he raised at her.

“I thought you said no Google Maps,” he said.

It prompted a smile out of her and taking advantage of the way they were positioned, she pulled her mask down, a bit. She hoped she could still win him over — and she hoped her smile would help her case.

“Okay, one Google Maps, but I checked before we left, technically, so that shouldn’t count.”

But smile or no smile — mask or no mask, it didn’t seem to work.

“It’s still too far,” he grumbled, slightly shaking his head, and Marinette deflated.

In the brief second of silence she barely afforded, she considered insisting. But she didn’t want to make Adrien feel worse instead of better. So she pulled her mask back on properly and stood up, puting into the cart a package of biscuits she’d been to busy to look at properly.

“The farther away, the less they’d expect us there,” she chirped — tone a bit too forced — as they moved on to inspect the cheese selection. She saw Adrien already eye the camembert and she tried not to think how much a single slice would stink up their car.

He didn’t let her continue. “They’ll still see our faces and recognize us. Our faces have been on the news for weeks.”

“And I doubt anyone that’s not Parisian cared too much to remember them. I don’t think they’ll recognize us in some remote village on the other side of the country when everyone expects us to be in Paris.”

“I don’t know, but I don’t think they’d pass up on free advertising. They could recognize us, and that’d be a free ticket to getting more tourists. If even Ladybug and Chat Noir like it there…” he shot back, trailing off with a sarcastic note in his voice.

He put the camembert in the cart, and left towards the next aisle while she was still looking at the less stinky cheeses. Anything to bribe Plagg into sparing them the pain of drowning in the smell for at least a little while.

She hurried to pick up something other than camembert and went after him.

Adrien was right, but she couldn’t quite tell him outright that what she wanted was to take him as far away from Paris as possible and make him forget — for a day, two, however long he was willing to — what happened in that city, and why he’d lost nights and days to stress and worry.

She knew she couldn’t make him forget about his mother, but she could try and make him see he didn’t have to waste himself away to bring her back when patience and self care could do half of their work for them.

They were still talking about it while picking up salty crackers and peanuts when someone finally recognized them. It didn’t take long for a crowd to form.

The more people gathered into the aisle, the more Marinette felt her shoulders sag. She exchanged a look with Adrien and heard him let out a subtle sigh as he took off his mask in resignation. He couldn’t quite hide how forced the smile underneath was, and she knew hers wasn’t much different as she followed his example.

They tried to make quick work of the fans while remaining as polite as possible, but taking off the masks felt almost as much a crushing defeat as it did during the battle with Hawk Moth.

It didn’t last as long as that battle, but it still took too long. Every new fan asked for another autograph, or another picture, or another answer neither Marinette, nor Adrien were all that eager to provide.

When the agitation died down and they were finally able to move, they didn’t even check to see if there was anything else they would’ve needed on the road. Instead, they made a beeline for the cashier. They took some more pictures while waiting in the queue, but hurried to put the masks back on the moment they were out the door, praying no more people would recognize them on the way to the car.

Marinette considered it good luck that no one did; Adrien instead kept saying how it was only his bad luck that made anyone recognize them in the first place. She made sure to mention he was so lucky, she didn’t even stop to fight with him over his paying for everything. It shut him up so quickly, she had the faint impression they’d have that talk again.

“Do you think they heard us talking about where to go?” he said when they finally found themselves in the car.

Marinette had been thinking about that too, but she’d convinced herself that the fans in the store hadn’t figured them out.

“They asked us everything from how the team is doing to why we like camembert so much. If anyone had caught on to the trip, I think they would’ve asked us about it too,” she responded after another second of pondering.

Adrien nodded and let his head hit the headrest. His voice was small when he spoke again, after a few seconds of silence. “Far away sounds really good right now,” he said, turning his head towards her; he hadn’t taken off his mask yet, but his eyes weren’t shining as bright as they did before entering the supermarket. “You really want to go to Provence, don’t you?”

She hesitated, but gave a small nod in the end. She imagined them walking aimlessly along empty fields of lavender and sunflower, so far from Paris the problems there would start looking smaller. She imagined Adrien, tired because of the sun and the long walks and the road, not because he couldn’t sleep in a house that reminded him of everything that had gone wrong in his life.

“A bit, yeah,” she conceded. “But I don’t want you to just go along with me. I want you to agree because you want to go there too.”

He grabbed his seatbelt and fastened it. Then, taking off his mask, he gave Marinette a small smile.

“I’ve never seen the lavender fields around there,” he said.

She arched an eyebrow at him and tried to contain a face-splitting smile. She saw Tikki sitting down on the dashboard, and Marinette took her eyes off Adrien’s only for the brief second she needed to exchange a quick look with the kwami.

“So, Provence?” she asked, fumbling with her own seatbelt and almost vibrating in her seat with enthusiasm.

His eyes sparkled, alive not with worry and the frenzy of panic, but with the promise and the thrill of an adventure he hadn’t let himself consider until then. “Yeah, but if you plan on driving there all the way today, I’m taking over planning.”

“You say that like it’s a bad thing.”

He rolled his eyes, but he was still smiling. “We’ll end up sleeping in a ditch.”

Marinette’s laughter was giddy, and even Adrien seemed excited as he picked up the map again and finally unfolded it with the intent to actually study it. After fighting with its size for longer than either of them wanted to admit, they managed to fold it in such a way that only the part they were interested in showed.

Marinette leaned towards his seat trying to peek at it too, but after a few moments of silence, only Plagg spoke.

“That’s a lot of roads,” he deadpanned, floating over Adrien’s shoulder beside a curious Tikki. Marinette couldn’t help but agree.

Adrien looked at her, a glint of amusement in his eyes. He raised an eyebrow and held her gaze as he tried to fold the map back to how it was before, without looking at it at all. She didn’t bother to refrain from throwing amused looks at his hands and the increasingly wrinkled map.

“Two Google Maps?” he asked, trying to make it seem like he wasn’t putting up a losing fight against the piece of paper on his lap.

She pouted,but it was clear it was fake by the way her lips pulled into a smile. She didn’t complain as she took out her phone and opened Maps. “Two Google Maps, but just until we figure out how to get on the right highway.”

She readied her fingers to type in a destination.

Instead, she proceeded to just stare blankly at the blinking cursor.

It gave Adrien the false impression he’d won their staring contest. He turned to the map to fold it properly and threw it back on the dashboard.

“What city do I put in?” she asked, turning her head to him. He gave her a shrug.

“I thought you said you checked already. Put in whatever you did then.”

“Yeah, but now we’re actually doing this, it has to be accurate.” She felt a bit lost as she stared at her phone, but she didn’t want to let the slight setback discourage her.

“Put in 'Provence' and see what comes up.”

“Some random spot, that’s what I tried last night too.”

He rolled his eyes playfully and, in less than a second, took it upon himself to do the hard work himself. Taking out his own phone, he turned it on and opened Maps too.

“Well, it’s a random spot in Provence, we’ll figure out the finer details wherever it is that we stop for the night,” he said as he typed ‘Provence’ in the search bar and waited for the line that showed them the way.

When it finally showed, Marinette looked at the time displayed below and did the math. “If we take turns, we could still drive all the way there tonight.”

“All the way to that random spot?” he teased, and Marinette swatted at him. He took her hit laughing.

“Just put your finger on the map and see what city’s closer.”

“You really want to see what sleeping in a ditch is like? We’ll find a city, but let’s decide on the way if we want to stop anywhere in between or not. It’s already been a long day, I bet it’ll catch up with us before we even make it halfway through.”

“Sounds good to me.” Marinette nodded with a laugh and Adrien turned his eyes back to the phone, zooming in on Paris.

“Seems like we won’t have too much trouble getting out of the city,” he mused, following the bits of orange that indicated busier roads. Then, handing Marinette the phone, he tried to turn around to the backseat. The seatbelt was his enemy of the day.

“I won’t put this back on,” he grumbled, undoing it again and stretching to get his backpack from the backseat.

“You will absolutely put it back on.”

Adrien plopped back down in his seat with the backpack held clumsily by only a couple of fingers, and as he rummaged through it, Marinette looked at his phone.

“Why is your battery at twenty percent already?”

He raised his head to her and gave a half-shrug, arm buried to his shoulder in the layers of clothes in his bag. “I couldn’t really sleep last night. I woke up early and killed some time playing games.”

Marinette wondered if that was particularly because of the day ahead, or just because he never really could. She couldn’t tell which was worse.

His expression turned triumphant as he fished out a wire and took his phone from her to connect it to the GPS.

“See?” he said, handing her his phone so she could see his achievement for herself. “Two birds,one stone. My phone is charging, and we have a way to get out of Paris.”

Marinette shook her head, and, with his phone in hand, leaned to his side to pick up the map again and give it to him. A fair trade — his phone for her map.

“So, any random spots you want to point at?” She nodded to it, prompting another eyeroll out of him. He gave an overexaggerated sigh as he unfolded it again and looked over the Southern part of France.

“Do you think they have orange trees everywhere in Orange?” he asked, still looking at the map, not at her, but Marinette let her grin grow wider anyway, already putting in the new destination.

“Wanna find out?” Next | Masterpost | Ko-fi

[rosecoloredknight]

Seedling, sunflower, bunny, pancake :)

🌱 Seedling: What is something you want to begin learning? writing the first draft for my novel. I actually have the premise figured out, and the plot outline is mostly settled. I also have six or seven character profiles completed (there's still like 28 or so more to complete), plus I wrote a short synopsis which I later expanded on. the goal of the decisions were a little difficult to separate but are set. Finally, I have 20 scene blocks drawn out although I still need to find and hire an artist to help me with the early concept art for the characters, theme, landscapes, and etc. However, despite all that, I am still struggling a little bit writing the draft. So yeah, I want to begin to lear how to write books or a novel.

🌻 Sunflower: What is one thing that brightened your day today? my professor emailed me in regards to the recent 6 page assignment I turned in to tell me that she was moved, and inspired by it; which she then followed up by saying that I'm a shining light to have in her class. that was so kind of her to tell me and it totally made my day. 😊😊😊

🐇 Bunny: What’s a song that you really like? the first song that comes in mind is Clean by Taylor Swift, however I just recently started listening to it so I feel like I have to add a few songs and artist that I've recently been liking A LOT as well. Songs: Falling and Adore You by Harry Styles. Overture III/Awake by Sleeping At Last, Thelma + Louise by Bastille, Passenger and Tidal by Noah Kahan, Crazier Things by Chelsea Cutler ft. Noah Kahan. Artist/Band: The Hunts.

🥞 Pancake: What is your favorite breakfast food? oatmeal with fruits on top. or my favorite Soylent drink.

[humblequestvinyl]

stick season

STICK SEASON, FISHER BROTHERS X SISTER!READER

APART OF THE ‘WE’LL ALL BE HERE FOREVER’ SERIES

SUMMARY: after the dust settles between the fisher siblings and mission ‘save the beach house’, y/n has one more wound she needs to patch up before she settles back in cousin’s beach.

inspired by stick season by noah kahan

◀ ⏸ ▶

lowercase is intentional! wc: 0.96k

warnings: mentions of a loved one passing (slightly), mentions of disordered eating & food! (if i missed anything let me know!) also not much mention of the fisher siblings!

a/n: im sold my noah ticket today and realized i havent written in this, in like forever. 

AFTER THE IMPROMPTU BREAKFAST AT DENNYS,

one y/n barely ate, there was one more thing she had to do before heading back up to boston to pack.

and that was to fix things with emerson scott.

the brunette was home and y/n knew that. she knew that emerson would be home no matter the time of day because when it came down to y/n fisher, emerson scott waited for the girl.

y/n’s suspicions were confirmed as soon as she turned onto emmy’s street, seeing her light blue jeep sitting on the front lawn, something her neighbors always complained about.

as soon as the fisher girl parked in front of the brunettes house, she didn’t even have to pull out her phone before seeing emerson walking towards her car.

“care to go for a ride?”

the words slipped out of y/n’s mouth with ease, and it took emerson seconds before she was sitting in the passenger seat, something she was not used to.

“where are we heading?”emerson questioned as y/n handed the girl her phone to play music on, and y/n shook her head, “sure as hell not here.”

chappell roan started to blast through the speakers of the old mustang as y/n took the long way to their destination and it was silence between the two girls, not wanting to relive the events from the night before.

it was almost an hour later when a smile spread across emerson lips, seeing all the pride flags scattered around provincetown, finally realizing where y/n was taking them.

east end books.

it was the first time the two had gone out alone, and it was the first time in y/n’s life that someone besides her mom and conrad cared about the book she was currently reading. it became the two girl’s favorite place.

soon after parking, the two got out and silently made their way into the store, adventuring around with y/n hoping to find a new book to indulge in while she was back in cousins.

it was almost twenty minutes later when emerson had walked over to the h/c girl, and peaked over her shoulder to see the book she was reading.

“a reporter and baseball player romance?”emerson giggled slightly as y/n closed the book shut, and turned her head quickly to be nose to nose with the brunette, “i feel like i shouldn’t be surprised.”

a small smile spread across y/n’s lips before she walked towards checkout and purchased the book. the interaction with the scott girl was small, but it made y/n’s heart pound with joy.

as the two walked out of the book store, and down the block, y/n kicked a rock that was in front of her before clearing her throat, “we’re um, moving to cousins.”

“you’re what?”emerson questioned, stopping dead in her tracks as she looked at the h/c girl, “what about the house in boston?”

“my dads selling it.”y/n shrugged as she took emerson’s hand to lead her towards the beach, and the two started to walk, “not like i could be in that house anymore anyway.”

as the two walked, y/n kept her head down trying to avoid emerson’s green eyes, one that y/n was afraid would show disappointment. something the girl had gotten so used to.

“i owe you an apology.”y/n spoke up, catching emerson’s attention as she looked over towards the fisher girl, “i not only have been a wreck with you, but i took my anger out on you last night when it wasn’t your fault.”

“you didn’t deserve that emmy, and i’m sorry.”y/n apologized, finally looking up to see emerson looking at the girl with slight concern.

“come here.”emerson whispered before pulling the e/c girl into a tight hug, slightly playing with her hair.

“i get it n/n, and i forgive you.”emerson started, and y/n took in a deep breath to keep her tears in, “but you need to start taking care of yourself better.”

“you need to start eating more hon,”emerson pulled back, and cupped the girls face softly, “start sleeping more.”

“i’ll be here for you sunshine, but you need to start taking care of that head of yours.”emerson finished, and y/n nodded as emerson brushed some of the hair out of the girls face.

“laurel is helping me set up appointments with my therapist again.”y/n spoke softly, afraid to break the moment between the two, “once i get back from boston, her and i are going shopping for stuff for me to eat.”

“good.”emerson smiled, before pressing a kiss to the top of the girls head, and placed her hand inside of y/n’s, “i’m proud of you sunshine.”

y/n smiled, before starting to tug the girl down the beach, “enough to get ice cream?”

emerson threw her head back laughing at the girl, and nodded before keeping pace with the fisher girl who looked like she had new life running through her.

“absolutely.”

[thefridgelovesfood]

Rules: Answer 17 questions & tag 17 people

thank you so much @adamngoodbuck​ for tagging me, I love to do these things 

Nickname: my brother and our mutual friends call me Bini [pronounced bee-nee]

Zodiac sign: leo

Height: 5′7 - 1.74m

Hogwarts house: gryffindor

Last thing I googled: maladaptive daydreaming, because I saw a post on tumblr and have never heard of that before. I study psychology so that was super interesting. [in case you´re interested as well, it is a psychiatric condition that can result in distress, can replace human interaction and may interfere with normal functioning such as social life or work. that´s just the first thing that comes up when you google that and i will definetly do some more research later]

Song stuck in my head: noah kahan - passenger [one of the first lyrics is i write my fears on green notes and i love that]

Followers: 45

Amount I sleep: 5 to 7 hours, 7 hours usually but my sleep schedule is messed up at the moment so 5 hours seem to be the new normal

Lucky numbers: 5 and 7

Dream job:  I currently want to become a forensic psychologist but what i really wish for, is me living in a nice cosy (light)house by the sea writing great poetry and inspiring other people  

Wearing:  leggins, a black shirt and a hoodie

Favourite song(s): this is so hard since i currently have 676 songs in my playlist. i am listening to a lot of noah kahan recently, especially his new EP cape elizabeth. my favourite songs off of that are probably anyway and maine

Favourite instruments: I don´t play any instruments but i could listen to people playing the piano all day long. I tried to learn how to play the guitar but failed massively due to my lack of discipline but who knows, maybe i will get there someday

Random fact about me: I have very cute dimples (i think they´re cute but whatever)

Favourite authors: nora sakavic, leigh bardugo, jennifer l. armentrout, chris bradford, john green

Favourite animal noises: a cat meowing at you when you spot it from across the street

Aesthetic: rain and thunder storms, golden rays of sunshine in the late afternoon, ocean waves, books that look used, tiny handwriting

Tagging: i don´t know if i can manage 17 people but here we go @eg515 @buckleystrand @thisgameissonintendo @merlypops @psifitopia @datleggy @whumpwriterforlife @spacedoutlesbian @beks-crooked-glasses @forforkssakes (that´s definetly not 17 people so if you see this and want to do it, consider yourself tagged)

[leeeealwoorld]

Hi guys! Whats going on?!

One year ago I decided to start an art journal :D

I've drawing a loooooot and I want to share with you some of my ideas. I HOPE YOU LIKE IT! :3

This page number 18 and 19. I get inspired by the song "Passenger" by Noah Kahan. I also wrote part of the lyrics uwu