#no. but I will at 3 am when I’m still reading Brenner. oh well.

[waugh-bao]

Ronnie's pretty sure it's all over, when Patti catches her new boyfriend and the drummer doing 'that.'

But, then, they never did give the girls enough credit.

(A tie in with the story 'Between the Lines', but it's 100% stand alone from that).

[lovestuckyhatemarvel]

Okay so, here we are with season 4 episode 1 of Stranger Things. But before I get into the episode, I need to explain something: I’ve never actually watched this season before. I have, however, watched Steddie compilations on YouTube. Regardless, I’m labeling this as a ‘rewatch’ because it’ll keep the series consistent. And parts of it technically are a rewatch. Anyway, these are also going to be way longer than usual because a lot more is just Brand New™️ to me. Although some I haven’t seen but do know because of fanfiction.

1.) I literally can’t remember what made the Texas shooting something that would be necessary to be mentioned at the beginning when America has shootings all the time.

Edit: I have been reminded of the actual case it’s referencing. But I think Texas shooting is going to become less and less of an obvious connection as time goes on, especially for people who aren’t in America. I am in America, and there’s just…too many shootings to keep track of, tbh.

2.) I don’t know why I’m watching this recap. I literally watched season 3 last week or whatever but they really cut out the Russian interrogation/secret base locating stuff entirely from their recap.

3.) season 4 really starts out by being like, “Remember Brenner? Remember that douchebag? Well, guess what. He’s actually super boring in everyday life.”

4.) 010 come on down to get your psychic powers tested and your ability to interpret Brenner’s bad drawings tested. Oh nvm at least now they’re trying to locate people only to witness both Six and Dr. Ellis’ death.

5.) Wait why did Brenner survive this? How did Brenner survive this? Ten is dead. Also, since when does Brenner care about the kids? It’s not like he’s treated them well.

6.) El looking really crazy covered in blood and basically hyperventilating.

7.) El’s got her own room. Also, we’ve gone 185 days since season 3 and now El is painting little figures. And is giving a recap via letter. Joyce is a telemarketer, Will is gay pining, Jonathan has a broken car and is a stoner. Argyle has a pizza van and takes them to school. The bullies in school are cliches.

8.) Nancy drives Mike to school and Karen Wheeler looks great. Also they want Mike home by 9 pm because of his 6:30 flight.

9.) Suzie is editing a D- to an A for Dustin.

10.) I love this conversation about crushes between Robin and Steve. Boobies. Although I don’t like Robin’s hair as much this season.

11.) Max rides the bus and missed a Thursday meeting so needs to go after lunch.

12.) oh there’s Chrissy. And here’s the marching band with Robin playing the TRUMPET. Looks like Vickie’s a clarinet player. Jason and Lucas on the basketball team while Dustin and Mike argue about girlfriends in the crowd.

13.) I know it’s way too early since Jason hasn’t done anything yet, but I already hate him. He just has a punchable face. “Think about all these dead people DID THEY DIE FOR US TO LOSE AT BASKETBALL?” I would have keyed his car in high school. Like oh my god.

14.) Mike and Dustin are nerds and freaks and proud of it. To be fair, Lucas always has been cooler than them. But also Lucas should have gone to Eddie himself.

15.) PACKAGE. FROM. RUSSIA. Man, do not ever send anything delicate to Joyce, she fucking demolishes packages. Oh, that’s an ugly doll. I’ve read about the doll but didn’t know it was that ugly.

16.) El/Jane has to go after a blonde girl talking about Helen Keller for her presentation about Hopper? That’s rough, buddy. Angela is a bitch and I hate her Ariana Grande looking ass. Will is trying and I love that him and El are siblings but yeah, no, that presentation went badly.

17.) Max is doing her loner thing but does get to see Chrissy being upset in the hall as she heads away from the counselor.

18.) C in English and C- in Spanish. It’s not normal for Max but babe, C’s get degrees. You’ll be okay. Max’s mom is drinking, working two jobs, and stepdad is gone. Max is still my favorite even if she is a liar. Lucas’ advice about finding something she cares about is technically good but poor wording and timing. Max isn’t really open for help.

19.) Stranger Things really loves shots of people in bathrooms holding the sides of the sink. Also we get to hear Chrissy vomiting.

20.) Chrissy’s hallucinating. She has issues with her mom being awful about her weight and honestly, mood.

21.) Oh hi, Eddie. You’re a goofy guy. And now Eddie walks across the table. Also honestly, so far the bullying in Hawkins is like, minimal. All that happened in that scene is Eddie got called a freak. Dustin and Mike do try to get the game postponed. I still think Lucas should have asked. Eddie’s got to pass Mrs. O’Donnell’s class and that’s it to pass the class. Eddie really does yank both those dweebs out of their seats with barely any effort.

22.) Murray has karate from 1-3 on Fridays? Good for him. Oh and the doll from Russia has nipples. Teeny tiny nipples. And now needs to be smashed.

23.) Everyone thinks it’s weird that Nancy and Jonathan aren’t spending spring break together. I still think Nancy’s a comphet case. I love that Mike asks Nancy and Dustin asks Steve. Max is sarcastic to Dustin’s request which is very funny. Literally everyone shoots them down. Dustin comes up with an idea nad sprints off faster than I knew was possible.

24.) Oh it’s the picnic table behind the school scene. And we hear and see a clock chiming as she waits for Eddie. I’ve never actually seen the build up to the meeting with Eddie. Did not know the clock breaks and spills spiders.

25.) Eddie is tempted to leave ‘cause Chrissy is acting crazy. Eddie is very dramatic and they were in a talent show together. Eddie used to have buzzed hair and now plays at the Hideout on Tuesdays. I would have loved for Chrissy to live and for these two to be another Steve and Robin. Chrissy asks for something stronger.

26.) El failed a math test, I think? And if that’s the test she failed, it’s extra sad because that’s what she called herself good at in the opening letter. And then Angela tripped her? And her stupid friends stomp on her project. I wanna kick Angela’s ass. El forgets that she doesn’t have powers and it’s so embarrassing. El doesn’t snitch but a teacher takes Angela away anyway.

27.) Will feels so bad and is trying so hard to help.

28.) I feel like it wouldn’t require a paint can from a tree to break a porcelain doll. Oh, Murray thinks it might have an explosive. AND IT’S FILLED WITH A NOTE SAYING HOP IS ALIVE AND IT’S WRITTEN IN CUT OUT LETTERS LIKE IT’S FROM A SERIAL KILLER. WHY DID THEY DO THAT??? LMAO

29.) And now it’s the championship. I feel like fanfics stretch episode 1 into like, 3 chapters. Steve came with his date to see Lucas. And here’s Tammy Thompson. And she’s…bad. this bad performance is worth it for Steve’s sassy expressions.

30.) Oh, hey Erica Sinclair. LMAO WAIT, IS SHE WEARING AN AMERICAN FLAG? GOD, YOU DWEEB. I will say that the rest of hellfire that just kind of chortles in response to everything is so far just background noise that I do not care about. I do love that Erica is way better at insults than Eddie and he kind of adores her.

31.) I still hate Jason.

32.) Technically if we’re going with the lore of we thought Vecna was killed by Kas then technically El/Jane is this show’s Kas.

33.) Okay going back and forth is too hard when they’re going back this fast between basketball and Hellfire so I’ll just summarize at the end. Lucas going in and the gameplay mirror each other very obviously. It’s an old trope but a good one. Eddie’s unhinged.

34.) “There is no shame in running. Don’t be heroes.”

35.) Dustin misses and so does Jason. But Lucas and Erica both win. This slow mo is kind of excessive. Eddie’s fucking thrilled that Erica did a critical success. Although did they actually need a natural 20 to win? That doesn’t really make sense if the guy only has 15 HP left. Presumably they haven’t been critting to attack this fucking thing this entire session. So really it’s a matter of going above his AC. And technically you don’t need a nat 20 to do that, especially if you have enough bonuses. Although they are playing a different version of D&D than I’ve ever played so maybe I’m taking out of my ass.

36.) Aw, Max listened to the game’s result on the radio. I thought she went. Her mom is passed out on the couch. Max takes food to a dog. Eddie lives like, directly across from her. For some reason, from fanfics, I thought they were like, directly next to each other. Still, Max saw Chrissy go into his trailer.

37.) Wayne works nights. Eddie does not know where his ketamine is. Should keep track of that. That is a very cool guitar he has though. Chrissy’s hallucinations are very bad now and she’s no longer responsive. And now the lights are flickering. Vecna’s ugly as hell. There are so many spiders in this vision. Eddie really is trying to wake her up but I’m not sure how he thought I DON’T LIKE THIS, CHRISSY, WAKE UP would help.

38.) did not know we see Vecna in episode 1. “It’s time for your suffering to end.” Don’t be weird, dude. And now Chrissy is floating. Her death is like, both weirdly graphic and also sanitized. Like it looks cartoonish. I didn’t realize how cartoonish it looks. Bones don’t break through the skin. There’s barely any blood. Her skin moves like putty.

[binbons-character-stuff]

1K FOLLOWER EVENT!!!!

I am so grateful that 1000 of you wonderful people want to read my stories about Benny’s characters! For the celebration, I wanted to do something a little different from the title fics, so we’re going to do Prompt Improv! Those of you who follow @hermioneshandbag​ and @logans-chestnuts​ may be familiar with this, but for my new friends, here we go!

How it Works:

There will be a list of dialogue prompts, places and scenarios. You will pick one or two dialogue prompts, one place and one scenario. I will improvise a drabble or short fic based on your choices. 

Choose a Ben Barnes Character

Choose one or two dialogue prompts

Choose a place

Choose a scenario

Also:

Please follow this blog

Reblog this post

Check out my other blogs if you’d like

Send me an ask with your choices

No anons this time around so I get to everyone’s request, but if you let me know, I will post without your name.

Send in as many as you want, and I may write more than one of your choices!

Blacklist #binbons 1k follower event if you don’t want to see more about this

The Lists

Characters

Billy Russo

Ryan Brenner

Benjamin Greene

John Whittaker

Sam Adams

Caspian X

Nick Tortano

Tom Ward

Dialogue

“Well! You always know how to brighten up my day!”

“I’d rather count the freckles on your nose.”

“Who’s a good boy??!!”

“Is this seat taken?”

“The bed is taking up the whole space. What exactly did you have in mind?”

“Wellll!! This just got really interesting.”

“Did you really just say that?”

“Are you bleeding?”

“Please pass the cyanide, I don't want to go on living.”

“I hope it was worth it.”

“No, you don't get to say that, not now.”

“I can do this all day.”

“I need a nap.”

“Do you really think that's a good idea?”

“I’m allergic.”

“Clean it up!”

“Was that supposed to make me swoon?”

“I can't stop!”

“We need a lot more practice.”

“If we survive this I am going to kill you.”

“Oh, and I suppose it's my fault?”

You sure you know what you’re doing?”

“Yeah, right there.”

“You gonna eat that?”

“Do you ever stop talking?”

“Look, don't ask any questions, just run!”

“Are you crying?”

“My eyes are up here.”

“What is that purplish mark on your neck?”

“Am I going to run into you everywhere now?”

“I never thought closets could be so exciting.”

“What in the world is that?”

“Please give me a chance to explain.”

“It’s not what it looks like.”

“I can’t believe you kept this all these years.”

“Why is your hair orange??!!”

"What's in it for me?"

“Are you planning to wear that in public?”

“Oh, no you don't!”

“How dare you!”

“Chocolate solves everything.”

“Exactly how drunk are you?”

“It wouldn't be the same without you.”

“Stop that, people will see!”

"Sorry, one's more than enough for me."

"Scoot over next to me and nobody will see anything."

"Do you always have to take everything too far?"

"You're dead to me!"

"You are quite possibly the very dumbest person in the long and storied history of dumb people."

“Ma’am, is this your dog?”

“No, it’s really not that complicated. He’s a bad person.”

“Hey… what’s wrong with your face?”

“The king is missing.”

“Ah yes, come in. Close the door behind you.”

“How could you do this to me?”

“Um, sorry. That one’s not for sale.”

“You’ve got thirty seconds to explain to me what you’re doing here.”

“Ain’t nobody ever told you who your real daddy is?”

“I know this may be hard to believe, but I’m on your side.”

“Never heard of that being used as a murder weapon before.”

“Just sit around and cry, then. I don’t have that luxury.”

“I’m sorry. I thought you were someone else.”

“That’s the nice thing about telling the truth. You don’t have nearly as much to keep track of.”

“Of course we’re best friends. No one else would put up with our shenanigans.”

“That’s the least of your worries.”

“Do you trust me?”

“You found it on the beach? You know, when most people take a walk on the beach, they pick up seashells.”

“Sir. This is for children only.”

“I haven’t tried this on a human yet, but it should be very similar.”

“What? I meant it as a compliment.”

“Who put this in my coat pocket?”

“I can’t do this any more."

“I know you did your best, but it just wasn’t enough.”

“Even if I could stop it, I wouldn’t.”

“You have got to see this.”

“I don’t really think of myself as a thief…”

“Are you just going to keep walking by or are you going to come in?”

“Please return to your assigned seat.”

“Dude. It’s 3 in the morning.”

“I can’t believe I used to think he was attractive.”

“Where are your clothes?”

“Well, you have me here. What now, pray tell?"

“I can’t believe I’m telling you this.”

“I should have told you this a long time ago.”

“I am only telling the truth when I say that you have not behaved completely as a gentleman in this matter.”

“I thought we were friends!”

“I thought I loved you, but I don’t even think I know who you really are.”

“She’s evil, but she does have a point there.”

“I didn’t know you could talk.”

“Sweetie, what were you thinking?”

“What makes you think it was an accident?”

“I know you’re here. You may as well show yourself.”

“This isn’t going to be a typical best man speech.”

“We thought at first that it was part of the performance.”

“I would break his thumbs right now if I could.”

“Why are you helping me?”

“That’s the worst reason I’ve ever heard to have a baby.”

“I didn’t even recognize you!”

“Is it worth breaking your vows over?”

“I told you not to read that.”

“Put the turkey down.”

“I didn’t ask to be abducted.”

“That’s the most disgusting thing I’ve ever heard.”

“Where did you learn how to do that?”

“I thought you had him!”

“Humility is not one of my many virtues.”

“How can you stand living here?”

“You don’t have the correct paperwork.”

“Careful not to break the—oh.”

“I wasn’t going to say anything, but yes.”

“Well aren’t you the cutest little thing?”

“Please don’t use sarcasm. It confuses me to think you're capable of wit.”

“After we lost you, things just weren’t the same.”

“If you were logical you would’ve killed me already.”

“Well, that could’ve gone better.”

“Sometimes I feel like she’s still at my side.”

“We’ve been waiting two hours.”

“Your services are no longer required.”

“I feel like we’ve met before…”

“Does he hit you?”

“Yes, it’s a questionable line of work, but I’m good at it.”

“She’s in the building.”

“Wow! It’s an honor to meet you.”

“I’m cured. I swear.”

“My chances of living to a ripe old age are unfortunately excellent.”

“Let’s face it, you don’t exactly blend in.”

“Forgive me if I’m misreading things, but do you want to kiss me?”

“Seriously?”

“That does not look good.”

“You were in an accident. Can you tell me your name?”

“Pretend to be here with me, this creep won't leave me alone!”

“Is that a gun/knife/crossbow in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?”

"I can't believe you did that!"

“That is the worst line I have ever heard.”

“The next time you break the law, don’t do it in front of so many witnesses.”

“Sometimes being a total bookworm pays off.”

Places

Hallway

Sidewalk

Lake cottage

Hospital

Your residence

Restaurant

Wedding

Funeral

Jail

The beach

A Society function/ball

The Forest

A cave

the mountains

A ship

A shop

a park

Library

An attic

A bar or pub

Scenarios

Reunion

Injured In a fight

Best friends to lovers

Stranded together

Drunk

Jealousy

You’re his tutor

Meet the parents

Waiting Room

Cooking/baking

Kidnapped

Blackmail

Mistaken identity

Both reaching for the last one

Forbidden love

Belated love epiphany

Road trip romance

Second chance

The one that got away

Marriage of convenience

Lose a bet

Wingman fail

Bodyguard

[loove-persevering]

Trained Weapon PART 1 (Steve Harrington Series)

Description: You were made to be a weapon, forced to kill on command. You were number thirteen, the lab had taken you at the age of eight from your mother and father locking you a way for training, if you didn’t do what you were told you were locked away. This time you were going to be killed you knew it, if you told them no they would kill you so the only thing you could do was run. And turns out you run exactly to the boy in a sailor outfit. (This will follow closely with season 3 of stranger things) 

Read the Prologue! 

Please leave me feedback! I am super excited about this series and it’s my first time writing some action so please give it a read;) ilysm

 _____________

‘‘Is she dead?’‘ You hear a voice ask. 

‘‘No, don’t touch her either!’‘ You hear a semi familiar voice call out and then felt a slight pressure on your cheek making you scrunch up your nose. ‘‘II’ll be right back, do not do anything while I’m gone’‘ The voice yelled again. 

‘’She’s pretty,’’ You hear a voice chime in. You had a horrible headache and the voices around you seemed to make it worse at the moment. You take your hand which felt like it weight fifty pound and lifted it up to your forehead which resulted in a unison of screams. 

 ‘’She moved!’’ A voice yells 

‘’Okay, Okay, okay,’’ You hear a panic voice next. 

‘’Dustin quit!’’ Another voice yells and once again you felt a pressure against your cheek. You open your eyes and close them blinded by the light, ‘’Wait close the blinds.’’ One voice says. You hear some ruffling and then peak your eyes open again and notice three boys standing in front of you and then another comes up behind them peering over their shoulders. 

 ‘’Where?’’ You try and speak but your voice still comes off weak like the other night. 

 ‘’Steve! Steve!’’ You see one of the boys with a hat on scream. You hear footsteps above you making you look up noticing the wood planks above you, you look around the room noticing a couch and a few things that looked like machines and you felt yourself start to breath rapidly. 

 ‘’Hey you’re okay,’’ The pale curly headed boy says looking at you intensely. ‘’It’s okay,’’ He assures you. You nod your head at him and feel a tear fall down your face. 

 You hear the footsteps get closer and then notice the boy from last night, only this time he was in normal clothes. ‘’What did you shit heads- Oh,’’ He says his gaze falling on you his eyes wide. ‘’Why is she crying?’’ He asks looking at the four boys. ‘’Did you do something?’’ He asks walking over closer to you examining you. 

‘‘No!’‘ One of the boys yells. 

‘‘She just woke up and started crying, we didn’t do anything!’‘ another boy says panicked looking back at you. You recognized his voice he was the one that said you were pretty. ‘‘What’s your name?’‘ He asks you. 

 You remember your parents gave you a name before you were taken, but while you were in the lab you were only referred to as thirteen. ‘’Y/N,’’ You tell them and they all look at you in shock. 

 You watch as one of the boys walks over to the tall one from last night, ‘’Are you sure she said she was like El?’’ He asks. ‘’When we found El she didn’t have a name,’’ He tells him. 

‘‘Eleven?’‘ You question making everyone look at you and you felt your cheeks flush. ‘’El?’’ You repeat what the boy had called her. 

 ‘’You know El?’’ One of them asks. 

You nod your head slowly, you had never seen El but you knew she existed she had escaped two years ago you remembered being so envious of her. ‘’Who are you?’’ You ask them. 

They all tell you their names Mike, Dustin, Will, and Lucas. You look to the boy from last night the one with the nice hair, ‘’Steve,’’ He says looking at you an admiring look to him. ‘’Last night?’’ He sort of phrases it as a question. ‘’You were bleeding and you passed out, what happened?’’ He asks you. 

 You look down noticing you were still dressed in your gown from the lab, you were laid on what you recognized as a couch and you sit up further looking around, ‘’I want to change,’’ You blurt out. You look up at the boy, Steve, who looks at you and nods his head eagerly and runs over to one of the machines you noticed earlier. He comes back with clothes in his hands, a pair of shorts and a shirt, you look at them all who seemed to be awaiting your next move and then you reach down to the hem of the gown ready to pull it off. 

 ‘’Oh shit!’’ The boy you remembered as Dustin yells, ‘’What is it with girls?’’ He says covering his eyes with his hand. 

 You look down not understanding why they were all so freaked out and you look up at Steve who seemed to have a hint of a smile on his face. ‘’Come with me,’’ He says to you. He walks over to a room and opens the door allowing you to move past him, ‘’You can change in here,’’ He says. You look at him and study his face, his hair was falling down and he wasn’t in that weird outfit from last night. You felt a strong connection with him when you looked at him, then last night when he touched your arm you had this vision of the girl who you assume was Eleven or El for short.  

You nod your head and he shuts the door completely and you change, you peel off the gown and throw it to the floor and pick up the shorts he had given you pulling them up your legs, they were too big but they would do. Then you take the shirt and pick it up pulling it over your head, as you pull it down the shirt drops over your head falling against your neck you weren’t in the closet anymore. 

You can hear the screaming and the pure terror as you watched what you knew so well, you watch your body be drug by two men across the tile. You felt them throw you into a chair and hold you down tighten the straps to your body, you felt them put something over your head and you scream moving your body in resistance. 

‘‘Thirteen,’‘ You hear the familiar taunting voice. When Brenner had left shortly after Eleven had escaped a new man taken his place Doctor Davis, he was your worst nightmare. ‘‘Kill,’‘ He simply commands. 

 You look at him confused and then someone turns your chair around and you were staring at your reflection in the mirror, then you found yourself staring at a man. He looked sick, like he was dying and he had cuts all over his face and a black eye. You look back over to Davis who seemed to be starring you down intensely. 

‘‘No,’‘ You fight back. ‘‘No!’‘ You yell and you squirm in the chair trying to break free. 

 ‘’Kill,’’ He repeats this time sounding more threatening if possible. ‘’Kill him!’’ He yells. ‘’Kill him or they die!’’ He says now sounding more calm and you look at him confused. He then looks down where he was standing and takes something in his hand slamming it against the glass, a photo. You look at it intensely and realize it was your parents, you gasp and look at him as he laughs mercifully. ‘’Kill,’’ He says once more. 

 You turn your head to look at the man through the mirror, you concentrate thinking about snapping his neck. You picture Davis’s face as you do so, thinking that he can kill your parents, well you could easily do the same but to him. You picture Davis in your mind and for a second you can even see him sitting in the chair in front of you and you channel all of your energy and the man begins to scream. Then you begin to scream warm tears streaming down your face you scream until your throat was raw and you could no longer hear the man in front of you screaming as your own screams were drowning you out. 

 Then the room went silent, and you were left only with your sobs. You lean over in the chair not able to breath and the sobs shakes your body. You killed him, you killed an innocent man on command the thing they had been building you up to do. You hear the door click open and footsteps and then slow clapping and you still were bent over not wanting to look at yourself. You felt a pair of cold hands touch your face and you flinch moving around but they were too strong. Davis takes his hands and makes you look up but when you do you no longer see the mans lifeless body you see yourself once again in the mirror. ‘’Beautiful,’’ He says. You shut your eyes tightly not being able to stand the sight of yourself, ‘��Take her back,’’ He commands. 

 You felt your body being shook and you could hear voices panicked, ‘’Y/N! Y/N!’’ The familiar voice of Steve yells next to you, you open your eyes slightly and see he was the one shaking you and all the other boys stood at the door staring in at you their faces looked scared. You look around at them all and then back to Steve who was staring at you with a look of sorrow and pity on his face, you couldn’t help yourself to you push your body against his and he takes in a sharp breath. You felt him cradle your body and you lean against him feeling his heart beat which was abnormally fast. 

 You once again hear footsteps ushering down the stairs this time it sounded like more than one person, and then the boys move out of the door way and you first notice the red headed girl and then she moved out of the way and you finally spot the girl from the vision you had seen. This was the girl who escaped, ‘’Eleven?’’ You ask moving yourself away from Steve’s body. He still kept his arm against your back and you look up watching the shock on the girl El’s face. You take your sleeve and push it up showing her the 013 on your wrist, and you notice everyone around look at each other not knowing what to say. ‘’I’m thirteen.’’ 

Part 2

OH SHIT THIS IS SOME OF MY BEST WRITING OKAY! 

[pennhursts]

The Arc of Jane “El” Ives/Hopper/Byers

This post will detail her specific character, and why I think her story will end on a bittersweet (heavy on the bitter) note.

But let me make it clear, and say that this is in no way what “will” happen in the next season(s) of stranger things. I’m not a writer on the show, and I can’t say with any certainty that this is “confirmed” or what have you. This is purely my own speculation from a narrative standpoint, and if it isn't to your taste, that's cool, because my take doesn't matter too much.

Oh, El. 

Beyond her minimal arc in season one, where her narrative purpose was to show the very serious effects of abuse and manipulation on the part of Brenner, as well as her opening of the gate, her multi-season development has been heading in a very specific, obvious place. Self-actualization and becoming her own person, separate from the lab.

I think a lot of casual watchers came away from season 3 with sort of a “okay,, what now?” type of attitude, and I can’t say that I blame them. Both in season two and three she’s been given the journey of self discovery (with Kali,  then Max) and while both carry their own emotional weight, they don’t seem to be held up as important plot lines in comparison to others, such as Max opening up emotionally, and Steve Harrington’s entire season 2 redemption being especially apt examples. As the audience, we are told that El is coming into her own, multiple times, but we are never actually shown long-lasting effects of this, instead opting for one-off easter egg references and her many, many wardrobe changes (which I adore, by the way).

In season one, Dustin, Mike, and Lucas’s stories are all somewhat the same; finding Will and accepting El as their friend. But when you look at season two, everyone has their own different, independent directions to go in. Especially if you focus on every other party member. Dustin & Lucas’s arc’s revolve around love; for Lucas in specific, becoming a more emotionally open, compassionate person. This is vital to his development and subsequent relationship with Max. And as for Dustin, well, he learns that Steve ain’t shit with women, but he gains a valuable relationship in him, even though he doesn’t ‘get the girl’. Will struggles (per usual), primarily with the trials and tribulations of possession-- along with his PTSD. Mike, time and time again shows symptoms of major depression and separation anxiety, his feelings for El having become nearly codependent. Max’s story lies in her horrible family life & opening up, the latter being something her and Lucas share in common. And El’s.... is focused on self acceptance, “who” she is; her familial history. And it was done again in s3. She’s shown who she can be by Max, but she’s still defined by her powers, and by extension her life in Hawkins Lab. I am of the belief that the Upside Down will take a backseat in Season Four, so that the human villains of Dr. Brenner and MKultra can really shine. Brenner was hinted at having survived the demogorgon for a reason, and I’m excited to see where it’ll go, and how it will affect El as a character.

Listen. It would be entirely amiss to not reference her on-again off-again boyfriend, Mike Wheeler. The short version of my thoughts on their relationship (in relation to her arc) is... it isn't meant to last. The long version is that all the charm that their childhood love held fully disappeared come season 2. I'm not saying this because I hate El or Mike, or because I prefer Mike with Will. I side eye their specific relationship because if the Duffer Brothers Incorporated™️ love anything, it’s a slow burn. I won’t get too into it in this post, but seeing as Jopper, Jancy, and even Lumax all had romantic “rivals” in their way,, the fact that Mileven just.... doesn’t? Well, it makes me suspicious. The “endgame” romantic relationships on the show are always flawed in ways that are fixable and realistic, fixed through personal development and communication. But Mike and El haven’t been on the same page since season 1, and if my speculation does end up holding some water, they won’t be seeing eye-to-eye dating wise until they’re broken up for good. Anyways, on with the meta. Sorry for that very long side-bar.

It’s not rare to read people clamoring for El to do a myriad of things to truly “become her own person”, like breaking up with Mike for good and sticking with Max, or staying with Mike and not being Max’s friend anymore, etc. 

(it’s funny how all of these have really nothing to do with El as a human being, just a participant in a relationship. makes you think, huh?) 

I see people wanting her to develop *more*, and while it’s a valid want, I don’t see it happening the way people expect. The duffers aren't trying to flesh her out at all, as I don’t think she was never meant to be the character of a young girl. Rather, she was meant to be a tragic example of parental abuse and science going too far, her story ending with her death at the end of season one. This initial story is a *tragic* one, which is why I think she's doomed (I have a very strong gut feeling that the series finale will *heavily* mirror season one’s, though my proof is non-existent. just a feeling) Her arc, sad as it is, might be that she never will get to be a normal child, or not for as long as she should. And that's really sad... but also very complex writing which I appreciate.

Here’s where things get sad. In the end, while she may come fully into her own, neither powers or abuse victim defining her, I feel her resolved arc will be short-lived. I think El, ultimately, will end up repeating history. Her fatal flaw of caring too much for the people around her will truly be fatal, and so I think she will ultimately sacrifice herself so that Hawkins will finally be rid of the Upside Down, for good. 

Which is exactly the type of heartbreaking thing that I could see them (the writers) doing.

But who knows, maybe they’ll do what they did in season one and hint that she’s not gone after all. Or I'm completely wrong and she’ll live through the finale. Either way, thanks for reading :)

[aperrywilliams]

A Normal Conversation Ch05 (Spencer Reid x Maxine Brenner)

Previous Chapter / Ch05 / Next Chapter

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Chapter 5: First date

Summary: Spencer and Max first date

Word Count: 3510

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

A/N: It's like I wish the first date was

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Waking up the next morning, Spencer was in a very good mood. As soon as the alarm clock rang, he jump off the bed and went to the closet to choose his outfit for the day. He gathered all his clothes and left them on the bed while he went to shower.

After the shower he quickly get dressed. He looked his clock and it was still early. Breakfast was prepared. While he ate his toasts, he checked his cell phone and realized that Max sent him a message with the address of where he would go to pick her up after school. "Excellent. It is not far away” he said to himself. He finished eating and brushed his teeth, pick his bag, and went out hoping that morning would pass as quickly as possible.

Max woke up that morning with the sound of the alarm programmed into the cell phone. Even sleeping she stayed for a few seconds thinking about what day it was. When she was more awake she got up quickly and sat on the bed. Max picked up the cell phone and texted Spencer with her school's address. She’d forgotten to send it to him the night before. As she did so at that moment she thought and smiled. "Oh Max. What are you getting yourself into?” She said to herself before standing up and going to shower. Before that she left preparing coffee.

When Max left the bathroom she went to the closet to choose her clothes. She meditated a little. "It's just a coffee," she said to herself. After that she chose the clothes and started getting dressed. When she was ready set up on couch with her breakfast and TV on to watch some news before leaving. Finished the breakfast, she got ready, she turned off the TV and went to work. "I hope this morning does not become so endless," she thought as she took her bag and closed the door behind her.

The anxiety of both made the morning the opposite of what they expected: it felt extremely long and heavy. Max had to deal with two classes where the children seemed to have been possessed by hyperactivity. It took a lot of effort to get them to focus and do the class activities.

In his side, Spencer had to face a box full of records from previous cases that Emily urgently asked him to review in order to present it in an inventory of expenses in front of other area heads of the bureau during the afternoon. It was a tedious and not very challenging task for him, but he knew that Emily needed help fast and who better than someone who is able to read at the rate of 10 pages per minute.

The clock struck 2:10 p.m. and Reid had already finished his task. He went to Emily's office to report his findings. As he knocked on the door and after Prentiss let him in, he began to "spit out" information.

“Of all the cases involving more than a single suspect, the costs in human and monetary resources rise to over 30% and that correspond to 45% of the cases we had last year. In those where a direct alliance was made with the local police before arriving, the costs were reduced by 10% and the cases that were in the DC area had an increase in the resources of the bureau by 25%. The average work time per person was 2.3 days per assigned case...” Prentiss looked at Spencer in amazement and not because she did not believe everything he said, but because his "speed" was higher than the average she was used to.

“Reid… stop… do you have all this information in a written report?”

“Yeah right. I was going to give it to you now” he handed her a folder with a two-page report of all his work. Prentiss started laughing.

“What…?” Spencer said somewhat misled.

“You could have just handed me this and I'd be happy. You didn't have to do a dissertation on the data” Emily pointed out.

“I thought a summary would be useful before reading it” he said convinced.

“Yes, I really appreciate it. But you just "spit out" everything out faster than you usually do. Something happens?” Emily could read Reid as well as J.J.

“Ehhh, no ... it's just that I have to go now. I must be at 3:00 p.m. in ... a place...” Emily knew she was right, something was happening to Spencer.

“So ... why didn't you start there? It's already more than 14:20. Go away!” Emily said after checking her watch. Prentiss had no idea what Spencer's plans were, but she was sure it was important to him.

“Do you need anything else?...” Reid asked anxiously.

“Spencer, go now!. You're late” Prentiss ordered.

“Okay. Thank you!” It wasn't long before Spencer ran out of the office to take his belongings. Prentiss couldn't help but laugh at seeing him leave in such a hurry. "Spencer 'running away' from work at this time on a Friday?... Oh boy, it must be something really big" she thought, then returned to her own job.

It was 2:59 p.m. and Spencer was standing outside Max's school. He took advantage of that extra minute to adjust his tie and adjust his blazer. On time, he saw Max come out through the main gate. She saw him and smiled. Spencer thought he was going to melt right then. He saw her approach to him and thought "wow! she is so beautiful!”. It had only been a week since he met this woman and he was as stunned as a teenager.

Max went out the school looking among the people and saw him standing by the gate. Perfectly ordered in a suit that "fit him perfectly," she thought. “But look at those eyes, Max” she told herself. “Michelle was right ... he really is handsome ...". When they made eye contact, they both gave each other an open smile. Max approached him repeating inside her head “don't look nervous... don't look nervous... don't look ..."

“Hey! Just in time!” Max said when she was already in front of Spencer.

“Hey! Hi. I had just arrived” Spencer replied, not knowing if that greeting was enough. He wanted to kiss her on the cheek, but they weren't close enough to his judgment to do that.

“Well ... Where will we go for our coffee?”

“I know a place that I think you will like and it is relatively close in this neighborhood, we can go on foot if it doesn't bother you” Spencer said.

“I think it's great. I like to walk” Max said with enthusiasm.

“Me too. Come on then...” Spencer gestured for Max to start walking first.

“Let’s go...” Max said starting the walk.

They walked a few blocks and Spencer stopped in front of a place called "The Biggest Art Coffee". Max looked at the premises and exclaimed with enthusiasm.

“Hey! Whenever I passed by here I saw this place, but had never had the opportunity to enter” Max said cheerfully.

“Okay, now is the time. We get inside?” Spencer asked. Max nodded.

The place was tight at the entrance, but passing a second door opened a large room where in the center is the barista's bar and around tables and benches to sit. The walls were decorated with pictures that emulated paints of great artists in landscape and portrait painting. Max was fascinated. Her eyes sparkled. Spencer couldn't stop staring her and he was truly delighted to see her so excited.

“It's fantastic. It's like being in a mini museum!” she exclaimed.

"I knew you would like it" Spencer said with satisfaction.

“Yes, very much” Max looked at Spencer and gave him a smile. “Shall we order?” she said pointing to the barista's bar.

“Sure” Spencer said. “What do you want to drink?”

“Double espresso with a whipped milk bud" Max said confidently and without thinking twice.

“You know very well what you like...” he pointed out. Max laughed at the observation.

“I hope it's not a bad thing...” Max said.

“Of course not! Is a good thing indeed. After saying this, Spencer went directly to the bar to order the coffees, while Max sent herself to a table located in a corner, which allowed her to observe the place in greater detail. When Spencer returned with the coffees, he sat across from her passing what she had asked for.

“Thank you...” Max said enjoying the smell that came out of his cup. Spencer couldn't help but watch her and examine how she took her cup, how she slowly blew and tried to drink sips of her coffee without getting burned. While she was talking about the photos and pictures that were on the walls of the place. He could bet she knew the history of all those paintings.

Suddenly Max realized that Spencer was looking at her almost without blinking. “Is something wrong?” she ask. At the time Spencer realized that he didn’t have been very discreet when looking at her.

“No. It’s ok. Very well, in fact ... I was listening to you carefully” Spencer said.

“Excellent” Max said smiling. Then she took her cup and held it up to Spencer's cup. “For our first date” she said making a toast. He responded by doing the same.

“For our first date” they toasted and each took a sip. "You know... it's funny..." Spencer started to speak. Max looked at him closely.

“What it is funny?” Max asked.

“Well, I'm not going to deny that I'm nervous about this” he said this referring to him and her. “Well, since the fact I didn't know how to invite you out. I rehearsed it a thousand times on the plane when I got back to DC”. Max was watching him intently, she didn't want to interrupt him “…And well, I finally ended up calling you. You know, I think it's funny that we have been talking for a week and this is our first... ‘date’”.

“Does the word "date" complicate you?” Max asked. Spencer shook his head not knowing if to say yes or no. “We can use another word if you feel uncomfortable...”

“No, is not that. It is the opposite, in fact. I like it ...”. Max was somewhat confused.

“Ok, let's clarify this. I think we are getting a little complicated” she said. “We are going to start with the essentials: Why did you invite me out in the first place? Did you feel forced by the message I sent you?” said Max.

“No no no. I invited you out because I wanted it... I like to talk to you ... and if it is in person, better”

“Ok... so, we agree that this is natural and that it should happen...”

“Yes...”

“What I am saying is that it is normal for people who have just met and have been in contact for a few days want to see each other again at some point. I think this needed to happen” Max said. Spencer nodded. Max continued with her idea. “Ok. I understand that you're a little nervous. I am also nervous right now” she confessed. Spencer looked at her and grimaced.

“Are you?... I could say that you hide it much better than me” he sentenced. Max started to laugh.

“Good, thank you. I thought it was more evident” they both laughed. Max continued: “Do you agree if we make this... I don't know... more relaxed? I think it is a nice symbol of what it was like when we first met. No pressure. Let's take things slow and see what happens”

“Take things slow… yes of course. I can do that. It is not my intention to do otherwise. I think you may have noticed by now that I'm not the ‘fast’ type” Spencer shrugged. Max smiled.

"I like that ... despite how solemn you are when invite someone out for coffee" Max joked.

“Solemn. Yes that's me” Spencer smiled as he drank his coffee.

“So ... did we reach an agreement?” Max asked.

“So is. We go slowly seeing how things turn out. No pressures” Spencer said.

“Excellent. We agree. Let's make another toast then…”. The toast was broken by a cracking sound that Spencer felt in his stomach and made him wince. Max noticed. “Did you have lunch?” she asked.

“Ehh, no... I passed the hour at the office” he explained.

“And have you been hungry all this time?” Max reproached.

"I hadn't really noticed I was hungry" said Spencer.

“No, no, no sir. You're not going to faint on our first date. Come on, let’s go” Max said getting up from his chair to leave.

“Where are we going?” Spencer asked.

“To feed your poor stomach. I know a good place” Max stated.

They headed out to the place Max had in mind so Spencer could eat. They walked a few blocks near the park where they were first met. During the walk Max reproached Spencer for his unhealthy habits.

“Okay, I'm not the example of a healthy person, but at least I avoid skipping meals. I don't know how someone could think fatigued, it doesn't work for me” Max said.

"I think in my case it would be worse to try to think without caffeine..." said Spencer.

“I give you that one. I agree. It happens to me too. Anyway, I think if a person is going to have bad habits, let them be the least”. Spencer nodded.

"I don't smoke and I don't drink," Spencer said. Max looked at him raising an eyebrow.

“Don't you smoke ... nothing? ... you never drink alcohol...?” Max asked curiously.

“I don’t smoke. Nothing. I drink alcohol only on very special occasions... that is, almost never...”. He thought with a grimace.

“Ok, I'm thinking that maybe the one with the least healthy behavior is me...” Max laughed.

“If I had said it before... would I have avoided this whole speech?” Spencer asked looking at Max reproachfully.

“Maybe...”. Max said with a shrug. “Okay, here we are”.

They had reached a local food restaurant. It was similar to a food truck, but it was slightly larger and had a hallway with a bar where people could sit. They approached the inn and the tenant asked them what they were going to eat. Without asking Spencer, Max asked for the house special burrito and two bottles of water. Spencer watched as Max made the request and said nothing to him. When it was time to pay, Spencer approached to take the account, before which he received a pat from Max in his arm.

“What are you doing? I invite you. You paid for the coffee, it's fair for me do this”. Spencer wanted to insist, but he sensed that perhaps it was not a good idea to argue with Max about it. In addition, his eyes fell quickly on the burrito that was provided to him for the tenant. In that minute he realized that he was really hungry. They took the food and sat at the bar.

“What am I about to eat?” Spencer asked as he pulled the paper out of his burrito.

“The best burrito you will eat in this city. I am not going to say that it is the best in the country, considering that you surely know more cities than me. This burrito is the precise balance between meat, bread, and dressings. It will leave you feeling itchy but very pleasant”. Spencer took his burrito and took his first bite with enthusiasm. He chewed and chewed, savoring exactly what Max had described.

"Wow!... This is... really tasty" Spencer took another bite as Max took sips from his water bottle and looked at him with satisfaction.

“I like to come here when I feel I need a good burrito. The better thing is that you can order to take home”. Max said while Spencer just nodded and decided to finish his burrito in one last bite.

“Really ... delicious. I must say that you were absolutely right about this”. Spencer said removing residue dressing from his mouth with a napkin and taking a sip from his water bottle.

They decided to stand up from the bar and continue walking, since the place began to fill up with people. Near the place there was a small square with benches. They decided to go there to be able to sit down.

“Your look better now. Do you see that it is necessary to eat?” Max said as she sat down on one of the benches.

“You can be sure that now I won't faint. But you have created a new need for me with that burrito” Spencer said. Max smiled.

“Nothing is perfect. Sorry” Max said with a shrug.

“The truth is… if we speak about perfection is risky to say it because each person can judge only for they own what they considered as perfection. Independently we have ideas of what perfect is, though there are studies that say empathy could finally generate a shared canon...” He realized he was rambling and  Max was looking at him with a raised eyebrow. “Ok... but it is clear that what I am saying is not relevant now…”. Max laughed out loud.

“No, is not that. I'm sure it does make sense. What's more, I could give you my opinion on that if you're interested, of course...”. Spencer looked at Max curiously and nodded. Max started talking: “you are a scientist, correct ?, that is, you believe in scientific facts rather than myths and legends...”

“Yes, although many myths and legends interconnect with scientific observations of the world...” Spencer said.

“Totally agree. But well, what if someone, with whom you empathize a lot, I don't know, could be a family member, a friend... if that person told you that he/she had a scientifically unorthodox experience, would that give more credibility to his/her story than if it were someone who didn't you know”. Spencer thought for a bit.

"No ..." said Spencer.

“Would you make him/her notice...?” Max asked counteract.

“Probably…”

“Even if that means a conflict between you?”

“In that case, maybe not”

“That's my point! I don't think there is a shared canon between people thanks to empathy, but rather that empathy is rather ‘accepting that the other is looking for something different’. And many times it is accepted to avoid conflict and the possibility of ‘not fitting in’”. Spencer was speechless. He just nodded. Max's reasoning was very reasonable even though it was in a completely different paradigm than his.

"Wow, that makes a lot of sense" said Spencer.

“It is not that I am very studious on the subject, but it is what I see in children. And we know that children's behavior teaches a lot”.

“You're right. In fact, our first social interaction is in childhood and that says a lot about how our future experiences might or might not be…” said Spencer. Max nodded.

Spencer was very pleased to be able to discuss things like this with Max. They were like his sociology classes, but applied to real life. It seemed that her experience in life and her work made her very accurate in her observations and very pedagogical in her explanations. He liked that. He certainly liked it.

They were talking for a few more hours when they realized that it was already getting dark. Max winced at her watch.

“It's getting late, I think I better go”

“Yes me too. Will you walk to your apartment?”

“No, I will take a cab. My apartment is not close to here.

“I'll go with you until you take it”

"Fine, thanks" Max smiled as they walked toward the corner of the street.

"I hope I lived up in this... first date" Spencer said as they waited for a cab to come. Max nodded at him.

“I had a great time with you Spencer today. Thank you” Max gestured to a cab that was coming a block away.

"Special credit to the burrito you bought me" Spencer said and they both laughed. The cab stopped and Spencer opened the door for her.

“Goodbye Spencer” Max said giving him a farewell smile. Before getting on the cab Spencer stopped her for a second taking her arm.

“Ok, It's my turn...”. He bent down a little to kiss her on the cheek. “Good night Max...”. Then he helped her to get into the cab. She smiled, staring at him and grimacing.

“Good night...” Max said before closing the door of the taxi and starting the way to her house.

This time Spencer didn’t want to walk to his apartment. He stood on the sidewalk for a while until he stopped a cab for himself. He was pleased. “Not bad for a first date” he told himself. “Alright Spencer. Achievement unlocked” he concluded saying to himself with a satisfied smile on his face.

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[elshopper]

Wish You Were Here

Chapter 3 - The Second Lie

Hi people I have added a new chapter :) Here she is. I owe a large thank you to everyone who has given me such nice feedback since I started writing this... you’re all incredible and i love you. 

Ch. 3 WC: 6,131

Rating: T

Summary: Mike and El continue their journey on the run as they slowly but surely come to the realization that this ‘vacation’ isn’t exactly what they thought it would be. They wait anxiously for Hopper’s first report, both secretly hoping that he’ll send the all clear that lets them make their way back home. 

Read on ao3 here, or down below. You can find Ch. 1 here.

June 14th, 1989 – 9:35 AM Brandon, South Dakota

Taking a deep breath of the stale air around him, Mike comes to after his first full night of sleep in what feels like weeks, except it’s only been a day.

Holy fuck, it’s only been a day.

He blinks, and turns his head from one side to the other, waiting for his neck to pop. The pillow the motel had graciously given him was nothing less than a sack of Legos, and he felt like he must have been absolutely exhausted to fall asleep that early, on that uncomfortable of a pillow, and still have slept all the way through the night.

He got up to pee. He was trying to be as quiet as he could to avoid waking El, looking for her in her bed as he passed. She was curled up in the thin sheets, facing the window, looking absolutely lost to the world.

The morning light was shining through the cracks in the curtains, and he thought it might be time that they hit the road again. One glance at his watch, and he knew it was time. Dammit. We gotta go, and soon.

It probably wasn’t as urgent as Mike felt it was, but he was freaked out. So freaked out, he had tried his absolute hardest to hide it from El all day yesterday because he didn’t want her to worry about him. He didn’t want her to worry at all. So maybe, if he acted like he was actually enjoying this whole thing (a ‘vacation’, if you will), she would too.

That way, she wouldn’t notice that he checked over his shoulder every five minutes for that menacing white-haired man in a suit that he saw in his nightmares. No matter the monster, no matter the scenario in front of him, Mike had always been haunted by the mere appearance Dr. Brenner. He made Mike so angry that it terrified him. He hoped, for the bastard’s sake, he was dead or on some far away island, because when Mike got ahold of him…

Shut up. Mike thought, stopping himself. You aren’t going to kill anybody, calm down.

But he was still freaked out. He felt like, if they didn’t get a move on right this very second that the bad men and scary doctors were hot on their tails with guns and ropes and sleepy medicine in syringes to make sure El would never escape and he would never be seen or heard from again.

All that faded away on his way back from the bathroom, when he saw that El had shifted in her sleep to face his side of the room. Her face was all smushed up in her pillow, and her mouth was open just slightly. She looked so calm, like she didn’t know how stressed Mike was at the moment. He thanked his lucky stars that she didn’t have a nightmare last night, thankful that she was getting some much-needed rest. He was always there when she called him in the middle of the night, but he had a sneaky suspicion that she didn’t ask him for help as often as she needed it.

He stood above her, ready to gently wake her up so they could keep going, but he stopped himself before he could gently shake her shoulder.

No one is following us, at least not closely enough to be all the way out here by now.

So, he just got back in bed, deciding to let her wake up on her own.  

He was so lucky to know so much about her – he knew how strong willed and powerful she was, how stubborn and determined she could be. He knew what made her laugh, he knew what made her nervous. He knew what made her happy and what made her want to hide. Even though he felt like he had known her for as long as he’d been breathing, he was still completely in awe by the simple things she did. For example, how adorable of a sleeper she was.

He let himself catch up to everything a little. Reminding himself what he was really so nervous about, and simultaneously why all of his worrying was unnecessary. If El was here with him, they were going to be okay. She was unbelievable, indestructible, and fierce. They would be just fine. He knew it.

El breathed what sounded like a contented sigh in her sleep. If he was being honest, he absolutely loved it that she stole his Math Camp shirt from him a couple of years ago. He never once questioned where it went, because he figured she had snatched it from his room. It was cute. Perfectly cute. What normal girlfriends did with their normal boyfriend’s t-shirts.

He wanted to reach out and touch her, but she was too far away.

He didn’t know how he was going to make it through college without living in the same town. He was torn – torn between being with her, and having the “true college experience” his family was always on him about. Even though (to his absolute disdain) his dad rambled on about “branching out” and “meeting new people” every chance he got, Mike knew he was at least a little bit right. New experiences in a new town were a good thing, but it didn’t mean any of those new experiences needed to replace El. Or any of the rest of his friends, for that matter.

He loved her. Much more than he could have ever imagined loving someone. It was different… that was the only way he could describe it. Different, in the way he was just sure. He was sure about everything she said, sure about everything she did, sure about everything she was. When he looked at her (even right now, as she was stirring out of sleep and blinking into the morning), he didn’t have a single doubt in his mind.

“Oh my God…” she said, yawning. “Mike, how are you already awake?”

“It’s almost 10,” he replied, reaching to flip the lamp switch on. She winced at the sudden brightness. “Sorry.”

“Did you sleep okay?” she asked, rubbing her eyes.

“I did, what about you?”

“Fine,” she replied. “Just fine.”

He was sitting now, waiting for her to start making her way out of bed, but she wasn’t. She was letting her eyes drift open and closed, fighting the idea of being awake. It would make him antsy if he wasn’t totally lost in watching her wake up.

“Why are you just sitting there staring at me?” she asked.

“Because I love you.”

“That’s weird,” El said, yawning one more time before opening her eyes for good this time. “But I guess it’s okay.”

“Oh, really?”

“I guess.”

Mike smiled, and it broke into laughter as he stood himself up to walk towards the bathroom. Before he could get very far, she rolled her way out of bed and stopped him, standing in his way with her arms crossed. Her hair was a little… everywhere since she slept on it wet, but she hadn’t yet noticed. He was glad, he loved her hair like that.

“How long have you been sitting there staring at me because you love me?”

“I dunno. Forever, probably.”

He leaned down to kiss the top of her forehead and walk on to the bathroom to brush his teeth, but she stayed in his way, pulling him into a hug which he gladly reciprocated. An impenetrable force, she seemed.

“Good morning,” she mumbled into his shirt. “I love you too.”

“I know.”

“Then why are you trying to walk away from me?”

“I’m trying to brush my teeth so my breath doesn’t stink, is that okay with you?”

She let go of him then, and followed him to the sink in the bathroom. He grabbed his toothbrush from the holder, and she did the same. In seconds, they were both brushing their teeth, taking turns spitting into the sink and trading looks in the mirror. She giggled at him, and he laughed at her – for what, neither of them seemed exactly sure.

Wiping the rest of the toothpaste off his mouth with the spare towel on the rack behind them, he turned back around to face El, who was doing the same on the washrag by the sink.

“Better?” she asked, mocking him with her facial expression in the mirror. For that, he swept her up all of a sudden, spinning her around and lifting her up so that she was eye level with him, his arms wrapped around her waist. Her feet were dangling about a foot off the floor.

“Mike,” she laughed. “Put me down!”

But he didn’t. He kissed her instead, and with that her hands moved from his shoulders to his face and she sighed. He did it to cushion what he was about to say, but he forgot all about that for a few seconds while he got a little lost in the way her fingers were playing with his hair. I’m sorry, El. I’m so so sorry.

Just as she was moving her right leg up to lock around his hip, he lowered her back down to the floor and pulled back to see her look back at him – all dazed and confused.

“El, we should get back in the car.”

She rolled her eyes and threw her head back, exasperated.

“Why?” she wined. “Haven’t we driven far enough? Can’t we just stay here?”

He could tell she was hoping that the proposition of staying here would tempt him, but he was sure they needed to leave and she frowned.

“I think we should keep going. I said so last night.”

“I thought you would get over that,” she said, as she grabbed her toothbrush and set off for her bag in the room.

“Come on, El, don’t make me the bad guy…” he tapered off, cringing a little at his choice of words and praying she wouldn’t fixate on them.

She fished for a set of clothes in her bag. He figured he should do the same.

“I just don’t want to sit in the car for an eternity like I did yesterday.”

“I get it, I don’t want to either,” he said, thinking hard about a way to make her not completely hate this. She stepped in the bathroom to change, so Mike just stayed put, swapping his pajama pants for jeans and pulling on a fresh t-shirt.

“Well, we can try to find something to do every couple of hours, how does that sound?” he called to her through the wall.

When she opened the door, she was in a different t-shirt and a pair of shorts with her hair up in a pony tail.

“I guess that’s okay,” she said, walking past him to grab her bag and toss it over her shoulder. She turned around, looking over the room one last time to make sure she hadn’t left anything. “Come on,” she said, and nodded him towards the door He took a few steps to follow her before stopping in his tracks.

“You go ahead, I’m going to check one more time to make sure we didn’t leave anything.”

He reached into his pocket and tossed her the keys. She caught them in her free hand.

“Alright… see you in a minute.”

When she closed the door behind her, Mike let out a small sigh of relief. Almost forgot. He opened the bedside drawer where he had stashed Hopper’s gun last night while she was showering, and made sure the safety was on before he stuffed it in the waistband of his jeans.

He figured she didn’t need to know about Hopper giving him a weapon unless something crazy happened – she would only get more concerned with the state of things and want to go back home all the more. Of all the places he could take her, that was the only place they couldn’t go.

It turned out that Sioux Falls was just a couple of miles away, so Mike decided it was the perfect place to refill the gas tank and grab them some breakfast at the nearest McDonalds. A couple of quick Egg McMuffins and cups of coffee later, he and El were at the first gas station he could find fueling up the car before they set off to find new scenery.

She sat in the passenger seat, with a baseball cap low on her head to avoid any of the stupid cameras that might be at the gas station – though Mike thought that was unnecessary. He didn’t see any cameras anywhere, as if they’d even have that kind of technology up here anyway.

As he was watching the gallon ticker move up steadily and tapping on the folded up manila envelope in his back pocket, El got out of the car and came to the back to stand by him.

“I’m going to run in and go to the bathroom really quick,” she said.

He mouthed to her, “Watch out for the cameras!” which earned him a light slap on the arm before she walked across the parking lot and into the store. A few minutes later she came back out to him, grabbed his hand and begged him to come inside with her. He reluctantly followed her away from the car, praying the door was locked.

“El, what are you doing?”

“I had an idea… look at these!” She motioned him over to a stand in between the named keychains and the mini license places.

They were postcards, with beautiful pictures of Sioux Falls, South Dakota in all its glory – scenic rivers and flowers and rocks and whatever the hell else was out here. El started spinning the stand, and her eyes lit up.

“El, you know we aren’t supposed to tell anyone where we are…”

She acted like she didn’t hear him, plucking one of the post cards up with the phrase Greetings from Sioux Falls in bold, loopy cursive over a rocky waterfall. Wish You Were Here!

It was kind of dirty – Mike could only guess the postcards had been on the shelves since the 70’s – and El blew the dust off the card.

“It’s only 15 cents, Mike.”

“But we can’t send it to anyone at home,” he whispered.

“I don’t want to send it,” she whispered back, determined. “I want to keep it. If this is a vacation, I want to treat it like one.”

She turned to him with those big, defiant eyes of hers, and Mike knew he couldn’t say no even if he wanted to. And where was the harm, really? As long as she didn’t secretly slip them to Max back at home, he figured it was a pretty good idea.

“That would be a cool way to know where we’ve been...”

“Like a travel diary!” she finished his thought for him. “I found one of Joyce’s in a box once.”

He fished a dollar out of the envelope in his pocket and she went up to the counter to buy it, putting the spare change in the Take a Penny Leave a Penny jar in front of the cash register.

Her souvenir in a little brown bag under her arm, El climbed into the passenger seat and waited for Mike to strap himself in. Once he buckled his seatbelt, he looked over to her and she was pulling postcard out, admiring the waterfall on the front. It was a pretty scene, but Mike didn’t have any idea where it was.

“We don’t have to tell anyone we never saw the real thing,” she said, smiling at him. He grinned, and leaned in to give her a quick kiss before shifting the car in drive and peeling out of the gas station. She grabbed the map out of the console, and tried to find their position on the tangled mess of roads and highways.

“Vacation day number two,” Mike said. “Where are we headed, El?”

---------

June 18th, 1989 Bismark, ND

The past few days had whizzed by in a weird slow blur, and El was convinced she knew both of the Dakotas as if she had lived in the two states her entire life. Her and Mike had weaved north and south through forests and plains for the past couple of days, deciding that they didn’t want to head much further from home before hearing what Hopper had to say that Sunday.

El had secretly been dreading what there was for Hopper to find in Hawkins. She had been pushing that tiny aspect of their predicament from her mind as often as she could, buying post cards at every stop and writing a few sentences about their day whenever she got a chance. It had been like a vacation so far – no bad men or horrors from their past in sight – except the fact that it was absolutely boring most of the time. El was pretty much reading her book one page at a time just to prolong the inevitability of finishing it in a couple of hours and having nothing else to preoccupy herself with.

Mike had been good. They had been driving less and less as the days moved past them, stopping to walk around quaint downtown squares, look in store windows, and eat in little country kitchens to avoid another burger from McDonalds. The places they’d been staying had been alright so far, with no extreme complications to date. One time, El was positive there was a hair that didn’t belong to her in her bed, but she just flung it on to the floor and forced herself not to think about it.

Mike was still getting them double rooms, something that El still did not understand. 

At the time, she just figured the first time must have been a mix of nerves and exhaustion, but the next couple of nights were the same. I mean, we’re still sleeping two feet from each other in the same room. El thought, every night, like clockwork. What’s the difference?

He let her drive sometimes, though, and she loved those few hours of freedom while she let him rest. They had spent so much time talking about everything under the sun, that El couldn’t imagine there was anything else left on earth to talk about.

After complaining about her lack of clean clothes, Mike had asked their waitress about the nearest laundromat (Laundra Matt? Who the hell is Laundra Matt?) and they had spent a couple hours sharing a pint of chocolate ice cream from the nearby convenience store and doing their laundry in this seemingly massive laundry room. Mike exchanged a few dollars for quarters and they did a few loads, goofing off while they waited. Why anyone would ever want to do their laundry at home in their tiny laundry closet when they could do it in a place like this was completely lost on El.

That was probably her favorite night so far, and she still stifled a laugh when she thought about being caught with Mike pushing her around the isles in one of the laundry carts by the old, persnickety attendant woman.

“What are you kids up to? I’ll run you out of my store if you’re messing around with the equipment.”

“So sorry ma’am,” Mike said, trying his hardest to hide his laughter. El hid behind him, a smile cracking on her face. “We’ll stop. We’ll leave soon, I swear.”

Now they were held up in North Dakota. After dinner that night at a diner outside of Bismarck, Mike pulled them into the adjacent motel, and El carried their bags while he went in to pay for the room. It had been a nice day, the sun had been shining, but there was a looming presence over them. She knew Mike would never ever say it, but he was hoping Hopper would tell her it was alright to come home. She hoped so too, and she had been anxious about it all morning – biting her nails and being fairly silent on the drive. She knew he noticed. He always noticed.

Mike passed her the keys – Room 115, and what do you know? El thought. A double room... At least this one has a TV. She put her bag down on the sixth bed she’d slept on this week, and they watched reruns of America’s Funniest Home Videos, Mike checking his watch every couple of minutes, until…  

---------

“Hey, kiddo.”

El has grown to hate it here, in the dark expanse of her mind. She always tries her hardest to come back here only when she needs to. Most recently, those needs had only been to find people of interest for Dustin and Lucas after saying “Fine, if you’ll shut up,” and seeing what Mike was doing sometimes when she missed him.

She hadn’t gone in her mind to look for… him… in about a year. She was too afraid she’d stumble upon something she wasn’t ready to see, or something that would make her lose control and create another… rift in the Earth. She felt like the world was too fragile for her to ever be exploring the full extent of her powers. They did much more hurt than good. She stuck to grabbing things that were out of her reach, being effortlessly coordinated, and doing the occasional party trick for her friends. The black void in her head was no place for her to spend too much time, especially when there were wonderful people in the dimension in front of her that she didn’t want to risk.

She was here now, though against her will, and Hopper was in his chair back at home. The lamp was on over his shoulder, the yellow light spilling into the darkness. There was a chilled beer can on the side table next to him. His eyes moved around the room, and El wondered about the rest of the scene… was Joyce waiting in the kitchen trying to look busy? Was Will impatiently listening on the couch?

“It’s about 7:30 our time. I don’t know if you’re listening yet, or not, because of the time changes… I hope he remembered the time changes…”

El almost rolled her eyes. He was always so on Mike’s case about being late. She swiftly moved her concentration to the lamp, and the lightbulb flickered a few times, enough to catch his attention. He looked up at it and smiled.

“Okay… okay you’re here then.” His voice grew in excitement. El took a step closer and looked in his eyes – they looked impossibly tired, like he hadn’t been getting much sleep. She sighed. She hoped, oh she hoped he wasn’t smoking again. She glanced on the table looking for an empty box of cigarettes but didn’t find one. Hopefully Will is holding him to his word.

“I – we miss you,” he continued, staring straight ahead. El moved a step over, so that she could pretend, just for a second, that he was looking right at her. That he could see her. “I hope you’re not mad at me.”

Ha. I’m not mad at you, I’m pissed, you stubborn son of a –

Hopper’s gaze shifted to someone she couldn’t see.

“What’s that? Oh. El, blink twice if you’re mad at me.”

Without a shred of hesitation, the lamp light blinked two times.

Hopper started laughing, likely with whoever else was in the room. It was absolutely agonizing not to know who.

“You don’t have to answer that quickly, Jesus,” he said, rubbing his eyes and reaching for the beer beside him. “Your little friend Max is already mad at me enough for the both of you.”

Max.

“Speaking of which, she’s fine. Everybody is fine.”

Hopper started to tell her what was going on in Hawkins. It was the absolute talk of the town that Ted Wheeler’s son had run off with his girlfriend for “no apparent reason” although most people in town knew it was because Ted probably told him he didn’t approve. Karen was upset – with Ted, mostly, for being so insensitive. She called Hopper every day to see if he had any updates on their kids, and every day Hopper lied and told her he had no idea where they’d run off to or why they’d gone.

He said her friends were told everything they needed to know, and they were pissed at him for not letting them tag along. Max was the angriest of all of them, and she had asked who needed to die in order to bring Mike and El back home. Will was a little down, probably because he was faced with all this for the first time in a while, and it was showing. Hopper was worried about him, and El could tell by the way he avoided talking about him altogether.

Just as El felt responsible for everything, so did Will. They shared that, and would often argue over it, but El couldn’t understand why he wasn’t scared of her. She was the one who did those things to him. He was the victim, and she knew it. She would say she was sorry, and every time he just threw the I’m sorrys right back at her.

Will, please be okay.

What El and Mike wanted to hear, most of all, was when they could come home. It didn’t have to be tomorrow, but they just wanted to know that it would be soon. The uncertainty of everything was weighing on them, and she could tell when she looked in his eyes. He was cracking under the pressure – pretending for so long that he was alright with it all. He was trying to be so strong for her, but she didn’t need it. She just needed to get them both back home somehow.

As she waited for Hopper to continue, she could feel Mike’s pulse in his hand that held on to hers. It was grounding her, and she squeezed it to let him know she was alright. He squeezed back. Any news would hopefully be good news. They just wanted to know something.

“But, uh, we don’t have any more leads,” Hopper shifted the subject. “Everything’s gone quiet.”

El swallowed.

“So just keep moving, kid. And be careful. Please.”

He’s still not going to tell me what he knows, is he?

“Have a good week. Be safe. We love you,” he said, his tone wavering a little as he spoke.

El flickered the light one more time, just before she opened her eyes.

“Any news?”

It was Mike now, and she had almost forgotten how refreshing it was to be seen by someone. That was one of the things she hated so much about being in there – not being seen.

“No,” El said, moving her hand to wipe her nose.

“Here,” Mike said, handing her the tissue in the hand that wasn’t tightly gripping hers in his lap. “What did he say?”

El remained solemn, she didn’t want Mike to know homesick she was. She knew he was too, and having to comfort her through it wouldn’t make him feel any better.

“Max is pissed,” El said, with a half-smile and Mike laughed.

“Of course, she is! She’s pissed she can’t be in on all the action.”

El rolled her eyes.

“He says your mom’s okay,” she said, moving on with a faint smile. “And that she’s madder at your dad than at you.”

“Shocker…” Mike said, lightening the mood a little. El laughed.

“Come on, I’m worried about your mom.”

“She’ll be okay once we get back,” he said, reaching to run a hand through his messy hair. “Which, I guess won’t be any time soon?”

“No,” she answered. “He didn’t tell me anything. He just said everything had gone silent and that we should keep going.”

“Well...” Mike said, and then he abandoned his train of thought and shook his head. “Then, I’m going to take a shower.”

As he stood, he put a hand on El’s shoulder and leaned down to kiss her forehead, taking her bloody tissue with him as he walked towards the bathroom.

“I’m sorry, El,” he said, turning around to face her from the door. “I wanted to go home too.”

She smiled at him in reassurance one more time, but once he closed the door, El flung herself back onto her bed, put a hand over her mouth and let a few tears escape from behind closed eyes as she heard the shower turn on.

I just want everyone to be safe. Is that too much to ask?

It wasn’t the not being home part. They were in a boring part of the country, sure, but El didn’t mind going on daily road trips with Mike. She didn’t mind eating loads of fast food. She didn’t mind getting to see him every night before she went to sleep and every morning when she opened her eyes. She didn’t mind a single bit of that.

But the fact that they couldn’t turn around, the fact that they were floating around the northern plains as fugitives running for their lives, the fact that her friends were in stupid stupid danger back at home… it was soiling all of that goodness. She didn’t even know who the hell she was running from… who was looming right over her hometown waiting to snatch her up the second they went back home... who was…

Mike drew her out of her thinking spell then, peaking his way through the door, his hair all wet, wrapped up in a towel like he’d forgotten his change of clothes on his bed.

“I’m sorry, El, but I have to know. It’s killing me.”

“You have to know what?” she asked, sitting up and sniffing away the last of her tears.

“He’s dead, right?”

“What?”

“Dr. Brenner is dead, right?”

El blinked, and opened her mouth, but before she could speak…

“Right?”

---------

A few minutes later, with Mike freshly clothed and sitting cross legged on the foot of her bed, El was trying her hardest to think of any possible way out of this.

“I mean, he died, right? He died when we were kids.”

“Y-yes,” she answered, looking down. Convincing. Way to go.

“How do you know that?”

His questions weren’t pressing, just curious. That didn’t mean she could answer him, not in a way that would ease his state of mind. Her heart was racing under her sweatshirt, and she moved a hand up to her chest to try and slow it down.

“Because,” Mike went on. She could see the gears turning in his head, connecting the dots. “What if he didn’t die? What if he’s still out there, and that’s who’s back in Hawkins.”

El swallowed, and looked down at the piece of lent she was playing with from the bed spread.

“He’d dead. I know it.”

“How do you –“

“Why can’t you just trust me?” she cut him off, a little harsher than she meant to. He took a breath.

“Are you scared to go find him? Because –“

“I’m not scared. I just don’t need to, I know he’s not there.”

He took another breath, looking lost in thought. Much to El’s udder frustration, she knew he wasn’t going to give up on this.

“Because, I’ll be here with you. But, I really think you need to do this. To make sure.”

Her heart beat buzzed in her ears. He was right, again. That was the worst part. He was right and she couldn’t avoid him looking at her in that way… like he would forgive her and love her no matter what she did next. Even if she persisted and kept refusing, he would still kiss her and wish her sweet dreams before he shut his eyes and went to sleep that night. Still, a tiny part of her wanted to do it. For him.

You’ll be able to prove it this time, she thought. This time, when you say that he’s dead, you will know.

El turned so that she was facing Mike on the bed, and took his hands in hers.

“Don’t let go, okay?”

“You’re going to be fine, El,” he said, nodding his head. “I promise.”

She closed her eyes, and away she went…

The blackness was back surrounding her for the second time that night. The water cold, the feeling eerie – like if she spun around quick enough she would see her greatest fears coming to greet her. But there was nothingness for eternity, just like always.

She could still feel Mike’s hands in hers, grounding her from what seemed like an infinity away. She knew he was there with her, his thumbs rubbing the backs of her hands.

Okay, El thought. You’ve been through worse. You can do this. Do it for Mike.

She pictured him, cold and domineering, and she felt her breath quicken at the sight – even if it was just her imagination. A lightning-fast rumination of all of her memories of him flashed before her, making her gasp and then squeeze her eyes shut – all to open them all over again to the blackness. This time, she could feel it. She was not alone.

She didn’t want to see anything at all. Blackness, like he never even existed.

El was very torn in two pieces. She could remember with grotesque clarity reaching out to find Nancy’s friend when she was a kid. What she found was a corpse, not a person. She wanted him to be gone so very badly, but she didn’t want to see him like that. And if he was gone, that’s the way he would be. Rotting away in the Upside Down. Demogorgon food. Like he should be.

Holy shit. She hadn’t thought about the damned Upside Down in years. She’d been pretending that it didn’t exist, like they’d all made it up as a part of some game. A figment of Mike’s brilliant creativity. It all came flooding back then, every ounce of their past as being something excruciatingly real and El couldn’t take it anymore. The only thing reminding her that she was still a part of the real world were Mike’s hands holding on to hers even tighter than before, and the wetness she could feel streaming down her face.

“It’s okay, it’s okay, I’m right here, you can open your eyes if you want to.”

She could hear him somewhere above her, echoing out across the rippling water.

Deep breaths, El thought. Get ready. Do it. One two three.

El kept her eyes closed, but spun around, omitting a quiet sob into the blackness. That’s when she swore she heard it – and she knew it wasn’t Mike because he hadn’t called her by that in years.

“Eleven…”

El’s eyes flew open then, but she found Mike kneeling in front of her with his arms out stretched, ready to catch her when she came falling forward. She fell into him, and he held her as tight as he could, stroking her hair with his hands.

“Shhhh, it’s okay. It’s okay. It’s okay, you’re back with me, see?”

She was aware then that she was sobbing, a pretty red mess dripping out of her nose that she went to wipe on her sleeve. She tried to breath deep and control herself, but it was so hard.

“Here,” Mike said, reaching again for a tissue and wiping her nose for her this time as she kept crying into his shirt, feeling bad for the mess she was probably making.

He just let her go, until her breath was back to normal and she stayed all curled up in his lap with her eyes closed.

“I’m sorry, I’m really sorry,” he rubbed her back with his free hand. Why on earth is he so sorry all the time? It’s not like any of this mess is his fault. “I shouldn’t have asked you to do that.”

They stayed that way for a few minutes, as El’s heart beat slowed. She was pressed tightly against his chest, so she could hear his too. Beating in quick rhythm with hers.

“Do you want to tell me what you saw?”

El made a decision right then and there, and she didn’t regret it. Not one tiny bit. She couldn’t go back there, she couldn’t feel that again. She couldn’t keep letting her mind – her fearful mind – trick her into insanity.

She looked up at him, with glassy eyes, and said to Mike with as much certainty as she could muster…

“He’s gone.”

And that… that was the second lie.

AN: Dun dun dun... (sorry). Part 4 is coming soon! Thank you so much for reading, let me know what you think!!!! ilysm

Tagging some sweet people: [ @puzzlingsnark ] [ @eleven-n-mike ] [ @dancingskygreen ] [ @formerlyjannafaye ] thank you for your kindness 💕💕💕💕

[backroadblues]

May 29, 2017 - Bavaria & Tyrol

Today was primarily a transit day. We would be making our way from Venice to Grainau - a small town just outside of Garmish-Partenkirchen. We will be spending 3 days in the heart of Bavaria, but first we must get there. The first challenge is to get from our apartment near St. Marks to the parking garages at Tronchetto. To do this we must catch the water taxi. Our objective is to arrive in Grainau by 4:30 in the afternoon. It will be about a 5 hour drive depending on traffic going over the German Alps through the Brenner Pass. We want to have enough time to stop in Innsbruck, Austria for lunch. Our target is to leave our apartment in Venice by no later than 9:00 am. We are actually early. Our plan was to catch the Vaporetto (water bus) at Arsenale and catch the number 2 line that goes to the Tronchetto. We purchased our tickets the night before so that we would be have minimal delay in the morning. It is a good thing that Trent got up early again because he want for his 6:00 am walk and determined that the number 2 line does not pick-up at Arsenale. We will need to walk a little farther to the St. Marks - Zachariah stop. We are at the stop by 9:00 am and are able to walk directly onto a bus. So far, great timing. We arrive at Tronchetto by 9:45 and now we need to find our car in the massive garage and pay for the parking before we head to our car. Once again great fortune, we come across the payment machine right off the bat, pay for our parking and then head up to our car. We find it and we are on the road by about 10:15AM. We are exhibiting military like precision with our timing.

The traffic out of Venice is a little heavy. We will be taking the A4 back to Verona where we will take the A12 north toward Trento and Bolzano. Traffic moves fairly well. As we begin to head up the mountains toward Brenner Pass, we stop for a bio-break and some diesel fuel. We would like to hit Innsbruck by 1:00pm. Our first snag arises. They are working on the roads leading up to the Brenner pass and traffic is very slow. It take us an extra hour to get to Innsbruck. We stop near the Altstadt (or Old City), where we are determined to eat in a Rathskeller - or beer hall. We have selected Stiftskeller based on some of the reviews we’ve read. I come away a little disappointed. We are arriving a bit late for lunch. Our waitress, whom we immediately nickname Helga reminds us a lot of the immigration people we met in Rome. Meaning she has zero personality. She actually seems a bit put out that we have arrived and want to order some food. I promptly ask for a table for 4 in my finest Italian - I have forgotten that I’m not in Italy anymore. I’m not sure why, since Helga is wearing leather britches and traditional Tyrollean apparel. Helga answers me back in perfect English and points us to a table and tosses menus down to us. She comes back and takes our drink orders and is waiting to take our food orders. She seem a bit put out that we actually want to look at the menus she has given us. She goes to get our drinks. While she is gone we look at the menu and are thankful that there is a section in English. Trent orders the “traditional Tyrollean party sampler”, a tray of cold meats and cheeses that we will share. He orders a couple of different wursts (sausages, one beef and the other pork) which are accompanied with a large pretzel. Carolyn and I order the Schnitzel and Elisa orders the pork cutlets with boiled potatoes. As we order, I’m doing my best to dust my German speaking skills so I can try to get a smile out of Helga, but everything keeps coming out in Italian. That is what happens after 16 days in Italy. it wouldn’t have mattered, Frau Helga is determined to be Miss Grumpy Pants. At one point I ask for some oil and vinegar for the salad and her look at me was like daggers. From that point forward the ladies were official scared of Frau Helga. Undeterred, I ask her for some Salt and Pepper and she grudgingly complies. I’m sure, if I could speak German and if I could have asked her why she is so unhappy, I’m certain that she would have told me that this is what she is like when she is very happy. It just goes to show you that we are culturally different from the folks in Austria. We had been joking about how non-existent the concept of “customer service” was in Italy. After Austria, we all agree that maybe it’s not so bad in Italy. We finish our meal and pay our bill. I make one more attempt to get a smile out of Helga, I hand her a reasonable tip - she does say, “Danke” but no smile. Oh well.

After lunch we have just enough time for a quick walk around the old town square. Elisa and Carolyn do a little shopping and we take pictures and we are all in awe at how clean this town is and how well preserved the buildings are. But alas, we must say farewell to Innsbruck and head on to Garmisch. It should only take an hour, but again the traffic is problematic.

We make our way down the mountains into Garmisch. The little town of Grainau, where we will be staying is a little past Garmisch by a couple of miles. Siri is leading us to our destination via my iPhone, but she lets us down. She tells us we have arrived, but our accommodations are nowhere to be found. After studying the street numbers on the buildings we determine we need to proceed further down the street by about a mile and we finally fine our apartment. We have booked this location via VRBO and after our less than ideal experience in Venice, we aren’t sure what to expect. We find the building, it is a traditional Tyrollean chalet style home. It is very large and has been converted to have 3 or 4 large apartments. There are also 3 smaller separate cabins on the property. We called our host earlier in the day to let her know we were coming and hoped to arrive by 4:30pm. Our host Carolin speaks very good English and she tells us not to worry, she will leave the key in the door in case we want to arrive a bit late.

When we pull in at about 5:45PM, we find the apartment with the key in the door and we are promptly amazed at what a beautiful apartment it is. The main part of the apartment is on the ground floor and it includes a spacious bedroom with king-size bed, a large kitchen, bathroom and living room. The windows on the ground floor include a French Door and all that glass looks out upon the majestic Zugspitze mountain. It is sitting right there looking every bit like a painting. The French door leads out to a nice patio and lawn. There is also a lower level that sits in a basement that still has some light from casement windows. the bedroom is again large and has its own bathroom. In addition to the spaciousness of the apartment and the wonderful view, it is appointed very beautifully and it is extremely well equipped. The host has gone out of her way to make this feel every bit like a vacation home of our own. Right down the the bottle of Proseco, water, coffee, tea and nicely equipped kitchen with spices and condiments. This place is the best we’ve been in so far and it may actually exceed our lodging in Positano.

By the time we are done cleaning up and getting settled and making phone calls to loved ones back in the states, it is now going on 7:45. We decide we had better go to the grocery store and get some groceries since we have an early start tomorrow. We get to the Aldi supermarket at 8:00PM and are surprised that they are closed. We try a couple of other grocery stores and all of them close at 8:00. So we stop at a gas station to at least pick up some water and a few other things. We then start to get a little worried about dinner and wonder if they all close early. Once again, a cultural difference between Italy and Germany. The Italians don’t think twice about having dinner late in the evening. We find a restaurant here in Grainau and fortunately at 8:30 they are still open and serving dinner. The restaurant is called Spatzenhaus and it offers typical German cuisine with emphasis on traditional Bavarian fare. We struggle with the menu that is entirely in German and our host speaks only a little English. By the time we order, we think we know what we are getting. Elisa has ordered a traditional Bavarian meal of roast turkey with a brown gravy. It would usually be served with dumplings but since she is gluten intolerant, the host suggest potatoes. Elisa opts for the boiled potatoes. Carolyn and I opt for steaks. I the steak with green pepper corns and Carolyn a steak with herb butter. Trent decides to try the Jager Schnitzel (Hunter’s schnitzel). It is cooked with mushrooms. Trent and I accompany our meals with local German beer and Carolyn a house red wine. When our meals come we are not disappointed. Elisa has 1/3 of a turkey - it includes much of the breast, the drumstick and a thigh. It is covered in a savory brown gray that is delicious. The turkey is a bit different than what we are accustomed to in the States. All the meat is dark, including the breast. Perhaps it due to the way they prepared it. In any case it is delicious and moist and the gravy that goes with it is also very good - though a tad salty. Carolyn are also impressed with our steaks. They filets are very large and well cooked. The fried potatoes are also good. Their German’s sure do French fries well. Trent’s schnitzel is also very good. He is surprised that it is not breaded and fried. Instead it has been sautéed in a wonderful sauce of mushrooms. As is often the case, in Europe, our meals are somewhat bereft of cooked vegetables and we only have green salads to go with our meals.

Our host was very friendly, unlike “Helga” in Innsbruck, the service was very good by comparison.

Thus, ended our day. Tomorrow we have a tour of castles and Oberammergau. We must get up and leave early to meet up with our guide. It will be about a 45 minute drive to nearby Fussen. It is probably only 15 miles away, but to get there we must drive around a mountain.

Aufwiedersehn - for now.

[thefruitsofloveff]

Chapter 5.

King

3:58 pm

“Where are we going?”.

Trent questioned for the millionth time as we walked through Times Square. I smiled, holding Titan in a firm grip and looking beside me at Trent.

“You’ll see. You like toys?”.

His eyes light up. I watched as he tried to keep his excitement content but it was evident how excited he was. We walked for another 3 minutes until we came to the crosswalk of the Toy’R’Us. Looking down at Trent, his face lit up with pleasure as we neared the 110,000 square-foot store. His grip on my hand tightened as he jumped up and down across the street.

“Look!!”.

He yelled looking up at the building. I nodded, guiding him into the building. I gotta admit, even I was a little surprised. Especially at the Giant Ferris Wheel inside of it.

“Can we ride can we ride!!”.

I nodded, letting his hand go and retrieving some money for my pocket, then walking to the line.

“We gotta go over there...”.

“To the girls toys”.

He nodded looking back at me and smiled.

“Yes for Titi and ummmm... uh... Oh yeah Sanaa”.

I laughed out loud shaking my head. As soon as our turn approached, I handed the boy at the stand our money, then following the direction he pointed in. We all hopped into the cart. Allowing him to close the door, we then sat patiently waiting for the fun to begin.

“Are we coming to your house?”.

Trent questioned. I nodded with a smile as he got excited and grabbed Titan’s hands. They seemed like a handful. I gotta give it up for Tiana, she doing a good job so far. Trent is well mannered and behaved. Shifting Titan on my lap correctly, I opened my eyes wide and laughed as the Ferris wheel began to mouth. Trent’s mouth opened as he let out a excited laughed.

Tiana

8:49 pm

“Is it good?”.

I questioned Sanaa with a cringed expression that caused her to laugh. She nodded her head, taking a bite into her Chocolate Chunk Pizza. We was having Dinner at Max Brenner’s and I guess it’s been on the top of her little bucket list to have the chocolate pizza. I am not a fan of chocolate at all so watching it splatter across her mouth was making me queezy but I was still enjoying the night with her. She’s been a doll. We got our toes and nails done. Went to FAO and bought some glittery girl stuff and now we’re ending our dinner together. 

She was kind of skeptic about opening up, but once she did, she was much more easier to read.

“It’s really good...are you going to see me more. I had fun with you”.

I smiled and shrugged my shoulders.

“Well it’s up to your daddy, but I’m glad we got to talk. I know how hard it is to loose a mommy. And I’m glad that I helped you talk about how your feeling”.

She smiled brightly, leaning over the table and taking a sip of her water, then chowing back down on the chocolate delight.

“Yeah. me too. I was sad but I feel better when I talk about her”.

I smiled brightly and nodded my head.

“That’s all you gotta do. She might not be here physically, but she’s here in spirit. Watching over you and walking with you”.

She nodded, then looked at the time on her phone.er face fell and she sat down in her chair properly.

“What’s wrong?”.

Shaking her head, she then exhaled and responded.

“I’m having fun and it’s almost time to go home”.

I laughed, shaking my head. Picking up my napkin I leaned over and wiped her mouth.

“Tell you what, see how your daddy feels about us hanging out and we can definitely do this again ok?”.

She nodded, perking up a bit and returning to her dessert.

King

9:22 pm

I walked out of my room, closing my door and letting out a breath of fresh air. I was suppose to keep the boys up, but the wore my ass out. I just laid them down and the rest was history. walking down the hall and down to the living room, I looking at the toys spread out on the floor. I laughed to myself and began picking them up. Once again I gotta give it to Tiana. All guys want boys, but damn they are a handful. My baby girl she’s good with whatever, but boys are all over the place. Even the baby was crawling and getting into everything. Overall though, It was dope kicking it with them.

After I finished, I threw myself onto the couch and rubbed over my face. I was tired as hell. As soon as I felt my self drifting off I was awaken by the sound of a knock at the front door. Springing up, I rubbed my eyes and walking to the door. Opening it, I immediately perked up opening my arms to allow Sanaa to jump into them.

“Daddy look. I got a nail polish and a purse and hair chalk”.

I smiled looking down at her as she unloaded her bag full of fun.

“I see. Di-”

“Oh and I ate and I had a chocolate pizza slice for dessert”.

My eyes widen as I pretended to be excited. I was fighting sleep. I was tired as fuck but her excitement was putting a smile on my face.

“I’m glad you had fun baby. Did you tell Tiana thank you?”.

She exhaled, turning around and hugging around Tiana’s waist. Looking up in her face, she smiled brightly.

“Thank you so much. Am I gonna see you tomorrow?”.

Tiana laughed, and shrugged her shoulders. Sanaa pouted looking at me, waiting for my answer.

“I don’t care. We’ll see though”.

She smiled, hugging me then taking off down the hall and to her room. She knew it was time to get ready for bed. Standing to the side, I allowed Tiana in and closed the door behind her. Sitting Sanaa’s bag at the door. I watched her sit down and yawn. I laughed, plopping down beside her and putting my feet up.

“How’s it go with the boys?”.

Letting out a breath of air and laughed and nodded.

“Good. You’re doing good with Trent, he’s inquisitive. Very inquisitive”.

She bashfully smiled, looking down at her hands.

“Thank you. Sanaa is amazing as well. Very sweet and bright”.

I looked back at the TV and smiled to myself. I have her mother to owe for that. She worked with her full time. Molding her into a amazing kid.

“Thank you. Now that her mother is  gone, Im trying to keep it going”.

“It won’t be a problem. Although she’s sad about her mother passing, she’s well aware that she’s in a better place and that she still loves her”.

I smiled to myself. 

“Thank you... for taking time wit-”

“Trust me. It’s nothing. She’s nothing short of amazing. Thank you for keeping the boys. It’s hard out here as a single mother raising boys. They have no male figure. I’m trying to play both roles”.

I nodded. My mother was the same way. I turned out good though, it’s all about the female raising you.

“Well, Anytime they wanna kick it with me. They can”.

She smiled. We shared a intimate stare down before she broke it with a clearing of her throat. Standing up from the couch, she began to pick up the boys bags. I quickly jolted up from the couch, stopping her in her tracks and pulling her arm softly.

“Thank you. Really”.

[survivornavarino]

Episode #11: I’m Gonna Beat Your Ass In Massachusetts Bitch -Julia

ok im rlly high and i accidentally joined this tirbal drama call and now im in too deep to leave and im crying julia is crackdt

Woo we love plans working out last minute

So I was just made out to be this terrible person and almost got eliminated, and I remembered how terrifying that is to have people upset with you. I don't think I'm gonna try villainy anymore (what just happened wasn't my fault btw even tho I was trying villainy I had nothing to do with this) it's hard to be a villain when you like everyone so I'm gonna stick to my hero stuff

Tesoro Tribe Call

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nq_3DCxuV3g&feature=youtu.be

Daaaammmnn Matt deserved better..... AND SO DID I WHAT THE FUCK https://i.imgur.com/sSWMk6p.gif How am I not supposed to feel some type of way when I get bamboozled by AAAAALLLL these people? 7 DIFFERENT PEOPLE LIED TO ME yet I'm not on the bottom! Gee thanks I can really tell with all this deceit in the air. Like the only person who would've had probable reason to lie is Heather because we don't even talk. The other 6?? I talked to within 2 hours of the vote aka when all this fuckery was going down so that means they actively lied, actively kept me out, and actively don't trust me. Fucking up my game and my villain edit?? Unacceptable- I worked HARD for both of them but now I gotta pop off just to stay alive... like fuck https://media.giphy.com/media/yKibNueqBiqU8/giphy.gif And is Jake serious right now? The amount of dirt I have on him could bury him in a second but he's gonna blindside me, the person with the power to make or break his game. Eddie and I gave him the world and he just flipped like THAT? Inch resting. And the Drew thing isn't even relevant because Jake got a heads up, did actually have a working relationship with Drew, was indeed down for that alliance that didn't come to fruition, AND actually snitched about the Drew vote to Drew so take a fucking seat. It doesn't matter that I wanted him in the dark because I knew he would snitch and spoiler alert: HE DID #noregrets. This would only be the same if I found out about the Matt vote and blew it all up to Matt, yet I didn't and somehow Jake is no different than me. Save it- the difference between us is I actually treat you like an ally and you treat me like a fucking number. But I am somehow supposed to trust Jake when all I do is give Jake more chances to prove he's reliable and trustworthy and he flops. There shouldn't be multiple instances both from this game and Crossroads of you being a shitty ally- that's ugly and well all know it. Jake enjoys screwing me like the selfish manipulator he is and he cost himself real allies over people who throw his name out all day everyday. I can't wait for him to read all this back, know who really had his back, and just how badly he played himself BECAUSE THAT'S NOT WHAT ALLIES DO!!! AND THE FACT THAT YOU KEEP DOING PULLING THIS SHIT MEANS YOURE NOT REALLY WITH ME AND IF YOU KNOW I COULD EXPOSE YOUR ASS WHY ARE YOU TESTING ME?!?! Big mistake https://media.giphy.com/media/ynxEIAfEyXjzO/giphy.gif https://media0.giphy.com/media/11LARa1r9DA4mI/200.gif And Julia really cut me deep because I thought her of all people would actually be honest with me out of respect. She's essentially saying she doesn't trust me with the Matt vote and that's why I got left out yet it's not what it looks like and I shouldn't be mad. But did we or did we not call earlier so we could "talk everything through?" You left a lot out sis, just so you know. MY FAVORITE PART is me and Rebecka calling her out on call as the Mo source but since she got the vote to be Matt and kiss-and-made-up with Mo, it's all good in the hood. Ummm NO IT'S NOT ALL GOOD and fuck this "do you guys have any more questions?" Get that condescending bullshit out of here- how we a pre-made Final 2 and you running blindsides on me? Keep it- Heather can have your allegiance I don't want it. I can't believe I gave these Crossroads snakes a fair shot and this is how they repay me- by making me look like boo boo the fool. That's ok though: Jake, Julia, Heather, Shoib- they all walking into jury next just watch also I recant from before- I love Eddie and he's the only person I actually ride with (besides Rebecka and lowkey Mitch). Like yes he's probably a bad influence and has Dr. Brenner tendencies but at least he's loyal. Everyone else will flip for anyone and anything and I'm like where is your self-respect. All I know is once I get power it's over for these hoes cause they just made enemies with the baddest player out here so let the games begin https://78.media.tumblr.com/e89499d0128508de7390015ff96fcbbf/tumblr_odd64ysiZI1snzc37o1_250.gif

Bamboozled- a memoir 

Ok so last vote I felt like having a little fun since there was no drama and that's boring. Mo came to me and asked me what happened with the Ben vote and I told him that someone told me about a 5 person faves alliance so I panicked and voted out Ben. So the part where I heard about the 5 fave alliance is true BUT I heard it from Jake. I told Mo that Eddie told me about it and I also told Mo that Julia is the one who leaked it to Eddie. So then the vote is between Julia and Mo because Mo starts going around and throwing Julia and Eddie under the bus. Julia gets online and is PISSED OFF, she starts gunning for Mo. Eddie was sitting pretty since he was safe from vote off despite me telling Mo that Eddie leaked to me. Then Julia and Mo make up and turn the vote to Matt and he ends up going home. Out of all the 3 names spread last round none of them were fans names. Now this round we have Eddie and Julia murdering each other and I am just sitting pretty, this is perfection. Eddie and Julia will go for each other til death do them part. This will come back to bite me soon but for now imma enjoy it.

I love Julia but, LOVE BE SAVING MY ASS RN. HER FIGHTING EDDIE IS AMAZING. SORRY HUN

I’m so over this drama, I’m sure somebody else explained what went down in their confessionals but now there was a huge fight between Eddie and Julia. A pineapple gown with glitter on it, bitch? Girl I just can’t take this, it’s too much, gimme my pocketbook I’m leaving.

These kids think I'm floating, that's it I have had it. Time to crank it up a notch

Ok so last vote I felt like having a little fun since there was no drama and that's boring. Mo came to me and asked me what happened with the Ben vote and I told him that someone told me about a 5 person faves alliance so I panicked and voted out Ben. So the part where I heard about the 5 fave alliance is true BUT I heard it from Jake. I told Mo that Eddie told me about it and I also told Mo that Julia is the one who leaked it to Eddie. So then the vote is between Julia and Mo because Mo starts going around and throwing Julia and Eddie under the bus. Julia gets online and is PISSED OFF, she starts gunning for Mo. Eddie was sitting pretty since he was safe from vote off despite me telling Mo that Eddie leaked to me. Then Julia and Mo make up and turn the vote to Matt and he ends up going home. Out of all the 3 names spread last round none of them were fans names. Now this round we have Eddie and Julia murdering each other and I am just sitting pretty, this is perfection. Eddie and Julia will go for each other til death do them part. This will come back to bite me soon but for now imma enjoy it.

i just love to start drama

so julia called me after the mo vote explaining that the whole eddie vs julia fight started with jake shit talking eddie. now i got them on call and hopefully they can work things through because i want them both to target eddie over each other so WOOOO let's see what happens. love you amanda lynn

FOR THE LOVE OF GOD CAN SOMEONE PLEASE GIVE ME THE ENERGY AND STRENGTH TO GET THROUGH ANOTHER DAY IN THIS GAME WITH JAKE AND JULIA I AM FUCKING EXHAUSTED!!! ALL THEY DO IS LIE, TIPTOE AROUND TORCHING MY GAME, AND SPREAD FUCKING CHAOS AROUND CAMP AND I HATE IT. I'm at work? Julia and Jake are stirring the pot. I'm on my lunch break? Julia and and Jake are stirring the pot. I'm out with my family and using my 8% of phone battery to do a mastermind challenge for Atomic? Too bad because Julia and Jake are stirring the pot. I tried to take a fucking nap today and you know what happened? IT GOT INTERRUPTED BY EDDIE CALLING ME TO TELL ME THAT YEP YOU GUESSED IT: JULIA AND JAKE ARE STILL STIRRING THE POT. CAN I FUCKING BREATHE AND OPT OUT OF THESE JULIA AND JAKE NOTIFICATIONS THAT I NEVER ASKED FOR??!? JESUS FUCKING CHRIST https://78.media.tumblr.com/2ff5849875cf45c8711b1b55220c4adb/tumblr_inline_oqvdwiJ7vP1qmpins_540.gif FUN FACT: SNAKES SLEEP BUT YOU CAN'T TELL BECAUSE THEY DON'T HAVE EYELIDS! WHY DOES THAT SOUND FAMILIAR??? OH RIGHT! BECAUSE THERE ARE SNAKES IN THIS GAME WHO LOOK LIKE THEY'RE ASLEEP CAUSE THEY AINT RESPONDING TO ME BUT DON'T WORRY! THEY'RE AWAKE THEY'RE JUST ON CALL IN PMS STILL SERVING FRESH TEA AT 2:04 IN THE MORNING ON A FUCKING WEEKDAY SO MY PARANOID ALLY WONT GO TO BED AND APPARENTLY THAT MEANS NEITHER CAN I AND IM SICK OF IT DAMMIT https://media1.tenor.com/images/9ce8330ea91f82d27ef3ceefbb69f277/tenor.gif?itemid=5307285

ok this is for julia post game. listen BITCH. i only leaked what you said to eddie twice (i think) well two major times so stop thinking that i’m a snake who leaked everything you said like YOU did to me with Ned in Crossroads. i told eddie you told me about your alliance with Rebecka/Matt but that wasn’t to put a target on you, Eddie did that by coming up with the idea to tell Matt you leaked it. Also I told Eddie that you said he was a snake in games and fucked over his friends because I wanted to know the truth. So yeah. I recorded a video confessional that i’ll post soon.

ok so i pulled out my macbook and im sittin here like xoxo gossip beckka.  so heres the gossip!!!!!!!: a. i have no fucking clue how i won touchy subjects and im thankful for immunity but now it makes me look like i know what the fuck is going on in the game and i DONT i really really DONT!!!! much spook very scare. b. i missed a lot of the drama this round. like really im so confusion.  i accidentally answered the call the other night right after tribal and then had to stay but i was too high so i said see ya later pals!! and went to sleep.  Then yesterday at work the main chat was blowing up and i didnt have the energy, patience, or phone battery to keep up with it.  Now this morning im in my alliance chat with eddie and autumn and theyre like referencing "what happened last night" and im like fuck i went to bed at 9:30 right after cash show like FUCK why am i always high or sleeping???? i should talk to my therapist about that tbh.   c. eddie comes to us with this mastermind plan that we need to get out not jake, not julia, but SHOIB.  what has shoib done? where are these numbers coming from?  how is that not going to come back to haunt us next round? d. ive goat a bad feeling about tonight.  instant tribal? fuck.  i was prepared for it to be a physical endurance comp when amanda asked if we'd all be around with a computer bc i know i can probably win that but its not on cam so FUCK ME RIGHT????? e. im rlly tired f. when i get voted out and put in jury im going to respond purely in cortana suggestions for a day or so and not tell anyone and see if anyone notices g. ok thats it for now tata, cya later alligator, hasta la pasta & all that jazzy stuff bye!!! xoxo gossip beckka

update 5 mins later: eddies heart is telling him he cant vote jake. autumn and i rlly picked the wrong ally huh 

also i miss matt double also i wish heather left instead of ben 

Update: 5 hours before tribal and Jake rlly be coming to me spilling cold dollar store tea with a broken tea bag and there's just gross, cold,  loose leaves floating around 

I just wanna win man, send em all home.

happy to be immune bc the chances that we're going to rocks I'll put at like 70% hehe 

i literally don’t even know how to process what the fuck is happening shit changed every 2 seconds i’m so confused ok so basically i helped flip the vote on matt last round because julia started to think that mo was being used and i knew that matt might have the idol bc eddie told me he probably did so i did that but left eddie and autumn out of the vote obv eddie was wicked mad and started going off on in the main chat and julia suspected that i leaked stuff to him based on what he was saying last night trixie called me and told me that julia was saying that i was a snake so we all called her and she said that eddie threw me under the bus to her and was leaking everything i told him about julia so i admitted it i was upset so i basically confronted eddie and he told me that he never leaked anything to julia and that she actually exposed me etc so i got pissed the fuck off and told eddie autumn rebecka trixie shoib that i wanted julia out julia gets home and immediately confronts me so i know someone leaked and trixie told me she was pretty sure that autumn or rebecka leaked and i don’t think trixie wanted me and julia against each other so we called our chat and i got julia to admit that autumn was leaking stuff to her and telling her that i wanted to vote julia out and that autumn wanted me out and autumn said that all the boys wantrd her out so now i’m fuckign freaking OUT BECAUSE AUTUMN IS A SNAKE AND PLAYING ALL SIDES AND JOW IT SEEMS THAT PPL WANT AUTUMN IUT I OFJT KNOW WHAT THE FICKNTO DO JM LITERALKY FREAKJNG OUT OMG FJQJSJDNSNSBS WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPNING THIS GAME IS LITERALLY CRAZY

I am very upset rn. I have had the hardest time just trying to survive this merge because everyone is againts me. I first have jake throwing me under the bus to eddie. FOR WHAT JAKE. i am still furious about it because he legit had NO right to do me like that. Like NONE. So ive been calling him back and forth but there is apparently a bigger snake in the game. Hi autumn! She wants to lie and say the boys all want me gone. She only did that to ensure heather and i were left out of the vote. How fucking low of her. I deadass opened up to her and Eddie, and I get done like this. Its a Shame truly. Anyways, i have to now worry about surviving yet AGAIN, and to get autumn voted out.

Im at work and i think autumn will officially be out of season! 

My mood is Julia and Heather selling me out on International Women's Day as the Julia leak to be with power snake Jake and ugly ass Shoib but doing it in front of Eddie, who told me immediately, so not only am I staying but one of these antifeminist hoes is getting rocked out. Can we talk about that I KNOW Heather and Julia are full of shit so how has no one thought that maybe I forced all this?? Like they wanna clock me for playing the middle but the gag is I'm about to chop the tribe in half and there will be no middle as of 9 PM EST. Me still surviving the strategic mess I accidentally created? More likely that you think- legends never die. I was scared about tribal, sure! And then I remembered who I am so I'm  excited for this messy ass 5-5 vote and why wouldn't I be? I now have 4 strong allies in the other faves, Mitch is turning on Shoib, Eddie is going against Jake, I found the right people who can keep a secret and have my back, and a line is being drawn in the sand tonight. Jake and Julia ain't going to rocks over no damn Shoib and I surely will call their bluff. The snakes are working hard but I'm working harder https://78.media.tumblr.com/4d981ac983bcb46cbba1ef0358d4b27d/tumblr_oq0f7ahXLt1qb87xmo5_r1_250.gif I can't believe Jake and Julia have the audacity to make an enemy out of me THIS EARLY. They thinking about Crossroads when they need to studying All Stars and Himalayas cause Crossroads was the exception in my org career not the rule. I'd like to politely remind everyone that my brand is flipping votes, poisoning jury, forcing ties, and getting shit done. So the way I see it is I'm just getting started- I have enough votes to stay by forcing a power play and I'm blowing this whole tribe up. I cannot wait for Jake and Julia to see who they're dealing with and shut the fuck up for the first time all week. And don't let me win immunity cause it's REALLY a wrap. Timing is everything in this game and I simply don't believe tonight is my time. It is time to take the trash out though and I got my gloves on and my Lysol ready https://78.media.tumblr.com/f28b1221360a1842c17d4a5af90fe6ec/tumblr_op2o8k2P9u1slyfzno1_250.gif

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pt_dZVzZUXc&feature=youtu.be

SHIT WERE AT TRIBAL AND I FORGOT THIS KSNFLSDNFSDKF WERE GOING TO ROCKS I HAVE BURGERS AAAAAAa