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bgomtori · 10 hours ago
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☆ casual - cbg
synopsis -> was everything casual? or something more?
-> beomgyu x afab!reader
-> friends to lovers?.. "more than friends less than lovers." angst, fluff, suggestive
-> warnings! situationship typa problems :( , self-harm, implications of self isolation, beomgyu can be an ass if you think about it.
-> note! this has been on my mind for a while now, sooo as a way to comeback to tumblr, i'm writing this :D BUT IM BACCKKKK!! i actually have 1 paper left but it's fairly easy to score soo i have a LOTT of time to write now!! also i'm really rusty right now SO IM SORRY FOR ANY MISTAKES 😞🙏🙏
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was it casual now?
beomgyu was confusing, so confusing. one second he’s all over you and affectionate, the next he’s just friendly and nice. you’ve always tried to let it slide but it has been eating you whole from the inside, no ‘platonic’ friend would do this, what the hell does he want from you. a relationship? a regular friendship? you can’t even answer it, not even your mutual friends can answer that question. you’ve constantly been caught in the pretense of a friendship or something deeper, you definitely wanted the latter.
beomgyu has always been close to you, you met him in middle school, at the playground, where he invited you to play a lame game of ‘freeze tag’ with a bunch of his friends. fortunately, or unforturnately, the friendship stayed throughout the years of ups and downs, but now you are stuck with the constant thought of, ‘is this something friends normally do with each other?’. how can it be casual when you know how soft his lips were against your skin, how he tasted like, how his body felt like against yours? these questions were left unanswered.
was it casual when you kissed all my scars and told me that there was more of me to love?
highschool was a rough time for you, having to balance studies, co-curriculars and your social life was not easy. you often found yourself mentally drained, and always out of it. beomgyu noticed all of these signs, yet you wouldn’t tell him anything, which eventually upset him. what was so secretive to the point you had to hide it from him. your best friend.
beomgyu needed to know, he didn’t want you to suffer alone, he wanted to be your light, your pillar of support. he went over to your house one day, just to chill. as soon as you opened the door, he noticed how detached you seemed, he could see it in your eyes even if you looked perfectly normal. he shut the door behind him, following you up to your room after greeting your parents. when he entered your room, he was shocked to see how messy it looked, which was unlike you at all.
“sorry for the mess, i didn’t have time to clean up at all..” you mumbled a quiet apology, sitting on your bed, looking up at him as he stood there.
“no, it’s alright.” beomgyu shook his head, making his way to your bed, sitting beside you. his eyes scanned your figure, before falling onto your arms. there were scars, scratches? no. he knew it wasn’t that, no cat would scratch a person that many times at the same spot. beomgyu’s eyebrows furrowed, how did he not notice? was he blind?
“yn. let me see your arm.” beomgyu asked, his voice sounded firm and worried. you started to panic, you forgot to cover them up before he came.
“it’s nothing beomgyu..” you denied it, unable to make eye contact with him, the floor of your room suddenly being the most interesting thing you’ve ever chanced upon.
“i’m not dumb yn.” you’ve never heard him this serious before, you reluctantly extended your arm to his direction, letting him inspect it. beomgyu winced at the sight, some were fresh, some were old and recovering. he shifted closer to you, his hands intertwining with yours.
“please.. tell me everything, all your worries and concerns, i don’t want you to suffer in silence anymore yn, you’re very dear to me.” beomgyu’s thumb brushed against your knuckles as if reassuring you that everything is going to be alright. your breath hitched, words stuck in your throat as yout lips quivered slightly. beomgyu noticed this, pulling you close and hugging you. his tight embrace triggered something in your head since you started to bawl your eyes out, letting out everything at once.
beomgyu listened intently, his chin rested on top of your head as he rubbed your back consolingly. he didn't care if you stained his shirt with your tears and snot, he just wanted you to be okay, to find solace in his presence.
after a while, you finally calmed down, your breathing becoming more steady. beomgyu lifted you up from his chest slightly, looking at your red, puffy eyes and pouty lips. his thumb carressed your cheek, wiping away the stray tear that fell from your eye. beomgyu's hand fell from your cheek to your arm, rubbing it.
"you're so strong, i'm proud of you for coping this much.." his words were genuine, so.. comforting. he took your arms, leaving chaste kisses on your scars. at this point, you felt as though the words 'let me kiss your pains away' had come to life. your heart began to race at the sheer feeling of his lips against yours.
"there's more of you to love, so please don't look down on yourself like that again. if you ever feel like your world is crashing, come to me, i'll always be here for you yn." beomgyu mumbled in between his kisses on your arm, his words providing you with perfect reassurance.
the words, "yeah.. i will." was all that you could utter out. beomgyu smiled against your skin, pulling away as he brought you closer to him again, leaving a kiss on the top of your head.
"that's my girl."
was it casual when we went stargazing and you told me that my eyes reminded you of the galaxy?
beomgyu knew you loved space, you've always had a fixation on them, whether it's about meteor showers or the stars beyond, you'd always talk about them. thus, on one random day, he brought you out to a secluded field, away from the chaos in the city.
"why are we here?" you asked beomgyu, following him closely through the grassy field. beomgyu smiled at you.
"stargazing, you told me you've always wanted to do it, so i decided to do my research." beomgyu said, his eyes looking up at the sky, "saw that this place was perfect for stargazing, plus it's close to our neighbourhood, so why not."
you felt your heart skip a beat, he actually listened to your constant whining about wanting to go stargazing but not having anyone to go with. you allowed beomgyu to drag you to the perfect spot, in the middle of the field, to just sit and stare at the stars. the two of you talked as per usual, ranging from harmless bickering to deep talks. your heart swelled in contentment, continuing to watch the stars shine back at you.
little did you know, while you were rambling, beomgyu would take his gaze away from the night sky and look at you, admiring the way your eyes would light up everytime you talked about something you liked.
"y'know, your eyes remind me of the galaxy." beomgyu suddenly muttered out, your eyes widened, along with his. he could feel his ears growing warmer with each passing second.
"huh?" you looked at him, still in disbelief.
"i meant what i said.." beomgyu sheepishly admitted glancing back at you, his eyes softening at the way you looked at him. he smiled to himself, before looking back at the pretty night sky.
"yeah i definitely meant that.."
was it casual when you kissed every inch of my body, comparing me to the stardust i was made of?
"do you trust me?" beomgyu whispered, his eyes softening at the way you looked at him. you gave him a quick nod, giving him some sort of approval.
he looks at you with affection and tenderness, each glance warming you to your core. his hand reaches out, fingertips grazing along your jawline. his gaze dips down to your lips, closing off the distance between the two of you. as his lips finally met yours, the kiss was slow, gentle, filled with unspoken emotions, his hands cupping your face carefully as if you were glass. beomgyu was savouring every moment of this, the world around him disappearing.
he pulled away, just to look at your flustered face and to catch his breath. you looked ethereal in his eyes, from the way your lips were swollen from the kiss to how red the apple of your cheeks were. without saying anything, he pulled you in for more. his tongue pushing past your parting lips, exploring your mouth. he pushed you slightly, making you lean on the headrest of your bed.
beomgyu continued on, leaving opened-mouth kisses along your jawline, moving down to your neck and collarbone.
"you're perfect.. so pretty." he mumbled against your skin, his hands intertwining with yours. he lifted his head to look at you, smiling at you fondly, he added on, "you're like stardust, so quiet yet filled with depth and light.."
"since when were you so poetic." you joked, looking straight into his eyes, it was corny, but it made your heart race. beomgyu chuckled, shaking his head.
"not sure, it just comes to mind when i'm with you." he shrugged, his lips meeting your forehead, placing a gentle kiss. your eyes roamed his face, scanning it for no particular reason, you words coming out without even thinking.
"what are we?" your voice was soft, barely a whisper. beomgyu looked at you, raising an eyebrow, "friends. are we not?" your throat went dry at his non-chalant response, fuck you hated it. you were disappointed, at him and at yourself, how could he do all this without any attachment? and why did you wish for so much?
"right.." you mumbled under your breath, letting him kiss you again.
is it casual now?
now that you're older, you noticed how beomgyu runs around, talking to other girls, not bothering about your feelings and the relationship between the both of you. you were pissed, he still had the decency to kiss you behind closed doors, but act differently around you infront of others.
he was in your dorm, laying down beside you, his arms wrapped around your waist loosely, giving you light pecks on your lips. however, you stopped him.
"beomgyu, we can't keep doing this." you pushed him off, scanning his face for any reaction. he looked at you slightly stunned, speechless.
"what?"
"i mean what i said, we need to stop this, you can't keep acting like we're not more than friends. i'm tired of it, it hurts you know." you explained yourself, letting your emotions get the best of you. beomgyu still looked at you speechless, unable to say anything, you took this as a sign to continue.
"if you only see me as a girl that you can just screw around with, then our friendship is done. if the 12 years of us being friends mean nothing to you, then we can stop all of this." beomgyu's eyes widened at your words, panic filling his eyes.
"no, no please don't.. i really didn't mean to hurt you, i'm so sorry." beomgyu shook his head, "please don't leave me, you're everything to me. i'm sorry that i felt you in the dust, i'm sorry that i flirted with other girls, knowing that i might hurt your feelings, i'm sorry for neglecting your feelings everytime. i'll change please yn.."
he was desperate, he couldn't bear seeing you leav him. the only reason why he decided to continue was because he felt like this was the only way he could have you, without the fear of rejection. he hated himself for hurting you like this out of his own selfishness.
"i'll change, we'll be more than friends, i'll drop the act now. i'll continue loving you like how i always did, i won't ignore you anymore." beomgyu begged, rubbing your arms gently. you listened to his words, not knowing if you could trust him.
"we'll start over. i promise i'll be the man you want." beomgyu mumbled, hoping that his proposal would gain a little bit of your trust. you slowly nodded your head, "you break your promise and i'll kill you."
beomgyu chuckled, wrapping his arms around you, leaning his head against your chest, "my life is yours then.."
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paperbackfable · 4 months ago
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Aloy: does it count as daddy issues if i just don’t have a dad?
Varl: in your case? yes.
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aka-indulgence · 5 months ago
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ough why is medieval times so hard to WRITE ARGRHAG
WHAT YA’LL DOING OVER THERE!!!
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mangokabuto · 8 months ago
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Just for fun I mapped the strawhats onto Brian David Gilbert's "Mortal Comfort" Ideal Cuddler Chart. I don't think i have them 100% right but i wanted to start the Discussion yk?
Here is my reasoning (sorta-ranked from most to least ideal according to BDG's criteria, though your personal preference may differ (as does mine)) :
MOST IDEAL STRAWHAT CUDDLER AWARD goes to Jinbe! He is big and soft and kind. I think he would be very good at it. He would take initiative to rub your back and have pleasant conversation, but he let you fall asleep if you wanted to.
Nami: Not a super adventurous cuddler, nor does she do it often. She WILL pickpocket you, so be ready for that. She's probably the closest to normal you're going to get.
Usopp: He needs to fidget with his hands and is happy to comb your hair or rub your back or massage your shoulders, but he's going to talk your ear off whether you like it or not, and he'll whine if you try to leave. Extremely clingy and needy in a cuddle, and his pockets are full of little gadgets and tools that are not super comfortable to lay against.
Luffy: Very enthusiastic but he will not sit still long enough, man is constantly adjusting or twitching. He's prone to squeeze too tight with the wrap-around rubber hugs, and if you aren't paying close attention he WILL put bugs and beetles on you. He's also the type to think it's funny to wipe boogers on you, or put his cold hands up your shirt. If your arm or leg fall asleep he's not gonna move for you, he's gonna think it's funny.
Chopper: He hasn't had enough practice yet, he mostly just wants to be held. Very enthusiastic though. Constantly making sure you're comfortable, to the point where it's distracting/a little annoying.
Brook: Bones are not extremely comfortable, but he is able to summon a cool/chilling wind so the temperature control will be ideal, and he's very polite and gentlemanly when he's not trying to see your underwear. As long as you stack some pillows around him to actually lean against, you're golden.
Robin: She will be up to some freak shit with her devil fruit I know it. Being cuddled by a dozen hands may sound very nice but she will turn them against you, either to tickle you right when you're falling asleep or grab your ankle and let you think it was a monster under the bed. She WILL be up to mischief.
Sanji: Also constantly making sure you're comfortable, much more than necessary, and will dote on you WAY too much while you're trying to sleep. He'll keep getting up to grab water or a snack or another blanket or something and won't just settle into the cuddle unless you make him. Also he is likely to either catch on fire or start violently bleeding from his nose depending on the circumstances.
Zoro: Very open to the idea of cuddling but not an active participant; he just falls asleep. He is essentially a very hard body pillow. (If he WAS actively participating he may match where Robin or Luffy is instead.)
Franky: Not a single part of his body is comfortable or free of hidden guns, but he will damn sure try his best!! He will also try and hold conversation and compliment you, but much too loudly. The enthusiasm is there, but...man he's struggling everywhere else.
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saspitite · 8 days ago
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GUYS. ALERT. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
BABY
SHRIMPS
i thought 98 mightve dropped her eggs bc it was a week and i saw no babies but THEYRE HERE THEYRE REAL THE SHRIMPLETS ARE ALIVE
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shireduchess · 2 months ago
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listen...listen... idk man i didn't expect downfall to hit me as hard as it did. but i'm at the end of ep101 and i have cried more maybe than during any other part of this story...and what a story within a story downfall is
it's about faith, the faith the mortals have in the gods and that the gods have in mortals, the faith in their creations, in and for their love of each other. and there is something so moving and intoxicating and emotional about that depiction, of gods deciding to become mortals to achieve an end goal, but of learning how much mortals love and feel and suffer
just the love between them all, everyone depicted. the wildmother and the lawbearer... the emissary.... trist and ayden, the everlight and the dawnfather... fucking just....everyone
idk man this sort of tragic story really just gets me so so so fucking bad, it hits me in such a unique way
#i am. so emo#cassida reaching out for the help of a god in a city that would kill her for prayer because her son is dying#betrayer gods and prime deities working together#asmodeus--ASMODEUS becoming who he is because he took the brunt of the force of their ship coming to exandria#the emissary being sent out ahead of the lawbearer because she could not bear to be unable to break her own rules if she had to save her wi#the way noshir's voice changed before the matron of ravens and he genuinely was a child#the way the lawbearer held the hand of her wife and asked the wildmother to tell her everything about her brave child#the way trist tried to hold onto her husband and children for as long as she fucking could. this mortal life she'd made#just...the matron of ravens being the matron of ravens. being kind.#the fact that the dawnfather was a fifteen year old boy#i am actively crying right now post episode#it's not a bells hells episode and i have missed them SO much but holy shit i think this six hour long insane episode has been my favorite#my favorite of the entire campaign#might even end up being of all of cr point blank eventually we'll see#not to mention the INSANE combat and roles#abubakar???? INSANE. what a fucking guy#silaha was a blast and the meteor swarm was unbelievable#the fact that nick knew the mechanics INSIDE AND OUT???#i'd literally watch it again just to pay attention to how he maneuvers the layers of abilities and stats#anyway im so weak right now#going to go through everything for those eps in the tags now#critical role#personal
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todayisafridaynight · 5 months ago
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no one understands the whiplash i get sometimes looking at chairman daigo fanart cause sometimes he's really pale or his hair's messy and drawn a particular way and i think its masato but nay .... im so sorry sixth chairman please forgive me i dont mean to compare you to that freak
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hyp3rfixation-h3ll · 1 year ago
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nobody ever talks about it, but i feel like it's always important to remind y'all that the 10 episodes in which BotBots takes place in don't (usually) happen back-to-back, so here's a post about it because it's kinda fucked once you think about it. TL;DR: the implications of how much time passes in this series are terrifying and the fact that the lost bots didnt lose their minds has me rolling a little
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unrelated steak cuts pride hcz bc i need 2 spread more propaganda and also to catch your attention >:] (Burgertron's are the butch, genderqueer, transbian and ADHD flags, Bonz-Eye's are the gnc, butch, nonbinary and autism flags!)
There's gaps in time between each episode, even with the half-n-half episode format, with very few exceptions. Ep 1B, (Never) Be Yourself, takes place the very next night, right after 1A (Mall than Meets the Eye), and in episode 10 it's established at the beginning it also takes place the next night, after 9B (Shopping Brawl). Hell, Dimlit in Love and On the Bot Prom Dancefloor have a gap in time between each other-- Dimlit states it's been 6 days and 11 hours since he and Jackie started dating in OtBPD! One of my friends, @knavewoods, did the math on it, and because the earliest date mentioned in the show is February and there's a Halloween/Christmas pop-up store, they estimated that by that point the Lost Bots had been at it for 7 months at LEAST, and that by the time of the finale it'd have probably been a year and a half because of the Science Alliance episode having a beach theme to it w/ the implications of it being summertime. (Not that either of us think that the Bots know what seasons are, but it's compelling evidence!)
A year and a half. That is a LONG time to be isolated from literally everyone you've ever known and loved, and not only that but the Lost Bots are being actively BULLIED half the time. Sure, they have allies like Lady Macaron and Jackie, but like. There's no way that ISN'T insanely upsetting to any of them, ESPECIALLY Burgertron. Imagine having your girlfriend play Hot-N-Cold with you for a YEAR AND A HALF. Idk about y'all but I'd be fucked up about that too. And not only that, but the finale establishes that Spud basically had it out for BT from the start. Imagine trusting someone so much that theyre your BEST FRIEND and it turns out they hated your guts the whole time and was basically the reason everyone wanted you gone forever for a YEAR AND A HALF. I don't think i'd be able to recover from that for a while. I don't know how to close out this post properly, so just. like. look at them and then absorb the words im saying into your brain ok? ok. bye :3
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#botbots tag 🏪#transformers botbots#tf botbots#maccadam#transformers#headcanon#media analysis#<- dunno if that's appropriate but ? shrugs#and now a word from our host!#methinks the lost bots should go to therapy because what the fuck#i think the fact that they managed to hold their head high throughout all of that is insane and absurd to say the least of it#not to bring kin shit into this but im burgertron fictkin + secret second thing#and i had to restrain myself from punching my laptop seeing spud muffin /J#but like seriously. if that was me i'd have to go to a psychotherapist or something because i wouldn't be able to recover from that#like at all. what the hell#OH BTW. that note about ulf isnt an invitation 2 go “i hate her meh meh meh” in my notes. i actually like her character#and the way some of y'all treat her is insane. she's a morally grey character and the things she says and does arent malicious#theyre out of impulse and she doesnt know the whole story . i know what it's like to be around manipulative people and to trust them#and the way she acts is very reminiscent of someone who is in denial that theyre being manipulated#burgertron does the same thing too and he rarely gets flak for it so now im putting down the same playing cards for ulf#sorry if that sounds weird or angry im just covering bases bc ive seen the way people act about her and she doesn't deserve that#i believe in womens rights and wrongs and this goes for silly juice box lady. she's the least best flavour but i still wuv her#knave said that she n bt are best off as friends as they dont mesh well in personality and honestly? that's the truest sentiment ever#me n knave. THE ulf the orange defenders 5ever and ever amen#okay rant in the tags over back 2 your daily scheduled madness
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heyitslapis · 2 months ago
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I need to get more Normal
#Very opposite my usual ''get weird'' motto#Im STILL gay spiraling & after sleeping for 7 hours woke up from a gayass dream & I'm not feeling normal about it#Ive essentially spent the last 24-hours thinking about T (the person im dating not testosterone)#I need to get more normal because I hate that I was so sheltered from any kind of romantic life that now my feelings go from 1 to like 50#which then means feelings & anxiety hits me like a truck & I'm left a jumbled mess without knowing how to regulate those emotions#which means I fall super hard because the affection is nice and I don't like change so when the time comes to go our separate ways#I crash back down to earth and struggle to handle things in a healthy way and it fucks me up#which is why it's taken me on average 2 years to get over the people I've fallen for in the past each time it happens#theres no way thats normal and healthy so whereas im usually all for getting weird this time i need to get normal#I hate being like this so I need to figure out healthier coping mechanisms and better emotional regulation like asap#cause last week I felt like I was gonna frow up with anxiety after being kissed and was scared and wanted to back out#and now im listening to Chappell Roan on repeat and trying very hard not to imagine kissing them a lot#AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA FUCK MY HELL BRAIN#the whole reason I started listening to Chappell was to imagine my OCs not myself wtf 😭😭😭#OK rant over Time To Be Normal#personal#emma rambles#dating tag
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crackwhorism · 11 months ago
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they don't know about my dark past (i was close mutuals with the most passionate finchel and mileven shipper on the goddamn planet for almost as long as i've been on tumblr and longer than i've had this account)
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cat-loving-elf · 6 months ago
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meenah: yo harley call in the LOBsTERs
jade: ok!! *she whispers something into her crab comms*
a comically large amount of lobsters proceeds to fall on them
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possum-tooth · 10 months ago
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scared to go to training again today
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lightgriffinsect · 8 months ago
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idk how to explain this but psychic gives me toxic chill male bsf vibes
#fnf psychic#friday night funkin#analysis#<- tentative tag lmao#whenever the dearests and bf are arguing he’s like ohmygodddd can we all just like…chILL#he doesn’t want to address the underlying causes of gf’s differences with her father.#he just wants things to smooth over and go back to normal bc to him that WAS the healthiest happiest time.#he’s aware that things have never really been right but he doesn’t know how to fix it when things have gotten so fragile#it’s like glass to him.#he wants a safe target for his frustration and resentment that’s been building up#so he takes it out on bf. not by actively confronting him or anything; he just quietly seethes while keeping up the facade of someone who—#—doesn’t care#he has strong opinions but only expresses them when he cares enough; when he feels like it’ll actually make a difference#which ends up being almost never BECAUSE he doesn’t bother to speak up when he could have#it’s like forced positivity but instead it’s just…forced normalcy. forced permanence.#he’s scared of things changing bc to him it can only ever get worse#psychic had nothing. thanks to dd he has everything now. and he doesn’t want to tip the scales#the uncertainty of how things will turn out must be reminiscent of hell to him. the way I see it at least#I assume he always had to anticipate death and be ready to go out fighting if he couldn’t claw his way to safety#and when dd showed up and helped him escape that changed his outward perception of the world#but deep down inside he’s still got the same mindset. it’s this or nothing. it’s the steady life he’s built with the dearests or it’s hell#and bf threatens that in a way psychic never could have foreseen bc of the way he’s grown up; the mindsets that have become facts of life#and that’s why psychic hates bf so much but he’s so Chill about it. he Doesn’t Care. and he doesn’t know this but that’s not helping#he’s gf’s toxic chill male bsf#i dunno man it’s 5 in the morning and I’ve just had sehri. im going to bed
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batcavescolony · 9 months ago
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Jughead Jones would have beef with Michelle Obama over her 'Healthy, Hunger-Free Kids' Act back in 2010.
#reason i know this: im aroace and have beef with Michelle Obama over her healthy hunger free kids act of 2010.#like ok i get that kids should have healthy food but thats not what happened. they just made everything whole wheet and now we needed to#buy a fruit and veg that was either half rotten of from a can. if schools actually made heathy good food that would be one thing but#they didnt! we used to have these warhead ices and the food was good and we ate it all then 2010 hit and the food was suddenly shit#and with this came alot of food waste too no one wanted to eat the oranges that fell off the back of the truck and over cooked green beans!#jughead jones#jughead comics#archie comics#and i took culinary and putting kids in the room with other kids makes them tey new things. their's a way you can them to eat healthy food#its by having that food NOT TASTE LIKE ASS! and not LOOK LIOE ROAD KILL! and obviously im not actually hating at Michelle she had her heart#in the right place its just the road to hell is paved with good intentions. it didnt work. usa school lunch is a literal joke!#and also in part with this what getting kids to move more and that didn't happen either! you known what i would have done?#got rid of the physical fitness test and have kids play funs games. making kids compeat against each other is a shit way to get them to#enjoy exercise! let them play. dont make them compare themselves to their peers. dont stop fun play in elementary!#and maybe dont cut their portions at luch and have them movie more? if you want them to move they need fuel to move!#just i have thoughts about the health and hunger free kids act of 2010 and how it utterly failed.#michelle obama#the healthy hunger free kids act of 2010#school lunch#american school system#american school lunch program#comics#forsythe pendleton jones III#riverdale#yall get tagged get over it#aroace jughead#jughead#archie andrews#it fucked with school food and jughead loves food
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dumbbullet · 9 months ago
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"omg [band i like] is so [fictional character i dislike] coded!!!" No it ISN'T!! get OUT OF HERE! *kills you kills you kills you*
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mementoasts · 10 months ago
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i'd rather fall out of a hot air balloon than touch my tablet today but i'm thinkin abt the birthday boys,,,,,,,,, ichi, masato, im love u both so much,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
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