#no toddlers running around
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Headcanon rambling ahoy, inspired by my thoughts from a Twitter thread that I had no room for, about a topic that people might not be interested in/care to hear contrasting headcanons about.
Again, this is a headcanon, not a theory or assertion I expect anyone to take as fact. These are my personal opinions on the matter, feel free to ignore them if you disagree with them.
Am I the only person who doesn’t really see Ganondorf as “dad” material? Besides the fact that he seems absolutely uninterested in procreation, much less marrying a queen or even having girlfriends. It feels like all the popular headcanons I’ve seen involve him having a gaggle of concubines and a million biokids, or he’s constantly adopting the younger iterations of Zelda & Link after being overwhelmed by paternal instinct, but…I just don’t see it. Like, I get that one scene with him tucking in an unconscious Tetra in Wind Waker resonated with a lot of people, but I feel like whatever sympathy he felt for Tetra was a very special case, given how he’s drawn to people he feels he has something in common with, particularly some sort of loss or denial of one’s ambitions or potential by The Gods/fate/Hylia herself/the royal family/whatever.
His aversion to/complete lack of interest in cishetero entanglements in every game he’s been in is to the point where, even if he’s not necessarily not attracted to women, I feel like there’s something about Gerudo culture that means marriage or even a totally informal romantic/sexual relationship with a woman would severely limit his personal and political autonomy as king. Also, the guy intends to live forever. He can’t really do that when he has a bunch of snotty, spoiled little blood descendants getting all uppity about their inheritance and trying to off him because he won’t get his ancient butt off that throne. Why on earth would a guy concerned with that carelessly spray his gametes around like some medieval European monarch?
The guy’s not even willing to marry a woman for political reasons! Not even for a land or cash grab from a rich and powerful family, or to stabilize relations with a warring kingdom, or to solidify his claim to a land he conquered, which was the only reason why nobles ever got married back then. He has kidnapped Zelda a million times, but has never once breathed a word about marrying her despite his whole schtick being the ultranationalist “Big Scary Foreigner Man Threatens Our Nation’s Fair, Nubile Women.”
I really do believe that one of the big reasons he keeps cutting ties with the Gerudo, beyond the political disagreements and murder and starting/continuing multiple wars, is that he cannot stand the pressure put on him as king to marry and make babies. He loves his culture. He loves his position. He loves his people (provided they respect him, keep their hands to themselves, and let him be in charge of everything). But he does not love the prospect of being passed off to someone like a prized breeding bull just because the elders of every tribe in the Gerudo region got together and decided she’d be the best candidate for queen.
And then there’s my general read on his personality. I can see him being the owner of many dangerous pets who he spoils rotten. I can see him tending a garden outside his castle full of brightly flowering ornamental plants (which are also very dangerous and would probably kill anyone who didn’t take the proper safety precautions). But I can’t see him raising a kid, whether from infancy or adopted at an older age. If he tried, he’d probably be really bad at it. The guy’s practically oozing generational trauma instead of sebum from the oil glands in his skin, getting it on everything he touches. He’s gotta sort his own business out before even considering taking on someone else’s. 😅
#loz thoughts#imo i also consider that in the games where he’s ‘won’ in the perfect castle he builds for himself he’s ALONE#no wife he took during the timeskip#no sexy scantily clad courtesans draped idly across his lap#in cadence he’s just got his big obnoxious pipe organ and ignores everything else#and in tears he has a throne big enough to fit a whole swinger party on top of that he occupies all by himself to meditate#he wants quiet and solitude for meditation or indulging in his personal obsessions#no toddlers running around#no spouse interrupting him with inlaw drama or reminding him of his Husbandly Duties hem hem#and that’s why i think that’s how he’s got his priorities set up#is he happy? absolutely not#but I don’t think he’d be any happier in an arranged marriage or with a baby dumped into his lap#any idea of ‘family’ he has comes from either his bioparents or his adoptive mothers#with him as the baby of the family and the only child and the center of attention#he would not handle being expected to play the june cleaver househusband or constantly self-sacrificing mom role well
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Prompt 225
Klarion is EXCITED. He's absolutely DELIGHTED even, unable to sit still as he flits from place to place. His baby cousin! Is! Visiting! Which OBVIOUSLY means he, as the older one, must make sure the main places are still standing so he can show his itty bitty baby cousin EVERYTHING! After all, he's never gotten to be the older one! He's always been the youngest in the family! But now he has an itty bitty toddler cousin- form recently shifted to match- to teach the ways of Chaos to! He's so EXCITED!
The League and heroes on the other hand, are Very concerned about Why the Witch Boy has been spotted in practically every major city in the US in the last few days. What is he planning?!
#prompts#dcxdp#dpxdc#klarion the witch boy#Danny fenton#Chaos & Clockwork are twin primordials#Danny might be stuck in this toddler form while he grows up again but this won't stop him#He is down for playing with his new cousin- aka causing mischief & exploring#Klarion is the realms equivalent of a 6 year old#Chaos has a very hands off approach to parenting while CW looks like he has a hands off approach#He is in fact a bit of a helicopter parent just via looking through mirrors#Danny is his first ghostling and look at all the danger he's gotten into at the fetus age of 3#He has a right to worry!#DC world is the equivalent of a playground for primordial beings to let their kids run around in#At least that's how they see it#Ghosts fight for playing so that's what Klarion does with the league kid/teen teams lol#There has been many a miscommunication due to most entities avoiding Realms beings like the plagues#space core danny#DANNY IS NOT GHOST KING
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The quest to find all the Dannies(Gotta catch them all)
Batman just got back, carrying the feral pun-making toddler still growling at him as he clenched harder on glove that he had to remove to satisfy the feral child.
Considering Joker's pride will be damaged for a while after he got sended in an ambulance to the emergency ER after the painful beating of his life and out pun- lashing he gained from this toddler.
"Back up, mister I am batman, more like a wannabe who obsessed with bats to become them."
Only to noticed Oracle holding the very same toddler who kept calling her Jazz,(are they twins?) Tim is trying to distract another one who trying to touch buttons on the Batcomputer.(triplet???)
Father, I'm keeping this-" damian came down still in his garden uniform, holding another toddler covered in dirt but he quickly noticed the other three toddler everyone else was holding.
"Possibly a meta ability gone wrong?" Tim chirped a bit as he picked up the toddler who whined about tucker not letting him touch the fancy buttons on his new computer.
"His name is danny, and he seems to be running from some people out to get him, and it wasn't safe to stay put together." Oracle said as she wheeled a bit, carrying the supposed danny mumbled softly before glancing worried at the danny in Batman's arms.
"He could have split himself into mini clones?" Tim suggested after giving the kid his spare 3ds.
"Split himself between personality wise, I believe, considering I'm not the jazz he is looking for, you're not tucker, Cass found four during her patrol, Duke got two following him around and I believe batman found the feral one..." Oracle said as she trail off a bit which wasn't good news.
"Some of the rogues also found a couple dannies.."
Previous Original post <- here
#dpxdc#dc x dp#danny phantom#dp x dc#dp x dc crossover#dc x dp prompt#dcxdp#toddler danny#he accidentally split his personalities into pieces#there about 103 toddler dannies running around gotham causing chaos#de aged danny#mr freeze doesn't know how this toddler is not frozen solid as he play in the ice in his lair#he wrangle the kid to wear winter clothes#poison ivy found a kid smacking her man eater plants around talking about some undergrowth#baby doll end up making friends with a kid#bane end up befriending a child during a jailbreak who speak the same language#killer croc found a very enthusiastic kid who think he some lady dragon
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THE NEWSREADER 1.03 The White Marquis Matinee Jacket
#thenewsreaderedit#tvedit#the newsreader#tim ahern#dale jennings#made by carolyn#this gifset dedicated to me somewhat recently learning about the aussie slang term pash#thanks to my toddler nibling being obsessed with jeff rosenstock running around saying Pash Rash all the time#had to look it up to see how inappropriate we were letting this child be lmao#anyway#dale your repression actually is fascinating
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Ah you're backt to da computer, I request the babies (Ramona and Leigon) in their ghostface Halloween costumes following/terrorizing Danny.
He's thrilled!
#ask#gier-the-gibberer#sorry chief i did not feel like drawing 3 extra toddlers so just assume they're running around in the background#my art#baby!legion#oc ramona
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the boys had a fun day at the beach
#i didnt know toddlers could play in the water omg ;-; they can also play wave tag?? but it kinda just looked like they were running around#ts4 gameplay#s4mm#the sims 4#simblr#s#jofl#the mancusos
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It's been like a month since I made an update for the get babied saga so here ya go
Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 (Part 5) Part 6
also, bonus:
#rottmnt#rottmnt au#minor interference au#get babied saga#rottmnt mikey#rottmnt leo#rottmnt donnie#rottmnt raph#turtle tots#rottmnt baron draxum#rottmnt fanart#rottmnt fan comic#rise of the tmnt#my art#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#the sketches for this were sitting in my drafts for like two weeks cause i just couldn't make myself work on them#but i have and they exist now#so. cool i guess#also fun fact: mikey is holding leo like that because if leo is on the ground he will try run around like crazy#and/or try to kick draxum in the shins (toddler leo is out for draxum's blood)#except he is very small and has toddler balance so he falls over and starts crying whenever he tries#therefore: so he doesn't try to kill draxum or scream his head off he has to be held
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Been slowly learning ASL over the years for my niece and I might still struggle to introduce myself or express basic emotions, but oh boy do I ever have the sign for every animal she's ever laid eyes on memorized better than my own name.
#there's no study partner quite like a toddler who loves playing pretend#I'll be watching a video where Bill Vicars is finger-spelling at the pace of molasses and I'll be completely lost#but with my niece though?#she'll sign “DINOSAUR!!!!” and I'll say “ON IT CHIEF” and bolt to pull up an animation i made of Twig + Kip that she's obsessed with#You haven't lived until you ask a small child what animal she's pretending to be while she's racing around the room#and she freezes in place#turns to you with the most solemn expression#and gravely puts up her chubby little hands to inform you that she's a monkey#then goes back to laughing her head off as she runs laps around the couch#american sign language#sign language#asl#sofie says stuff
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the character development and world building for my story are so good guys. believe me. what i see in my head is crazy. im having like. biblical level visions of my funny characters running around bludgeoning each other and dying
#spacie spoinks#they're running around like toddlers#nebbie is trying to grab the lighter from the top shelf#DONT LET HER GET THAT#OHH FUCK OHH FUCK OH SHIT#SHE FIGURED OUT HOWTA USE THE LIGHTER#THE HOUSE IS BURNING DOWN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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meh. something else i liked
#preg#mpreg#overse#26#14#ocs#ram#they cant tell the kids this cuz then ull have 2 toddlers running around bragging that they ate their triplet#i just liked how these looked! good evening#he/him for both btw#drawl
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you need to read blue lock bc i am telling you, if you love silly, unserious lil guys, wait til you hear that there is a professional team that our main characters play for that literally has them running around a field, sporting jerseys that say BASTARD really big on the front!!!!!!!!!!
#they're so silly#so there's just toddlers running around in the verse then... wearing lil baby bastard jerseys
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I have this HC for spider that I need to get out of my skull.
he was a cuddly baby. like, you could hold him, snuggle, even nap with him all day without a single complaint. he soaked up any and all physical affection he could.
now this isn't to mistake him with a sleepy baby, no no, he was something much more dangerous; he was the type of baby that would trick you into holding him all day, basically hiding his energy,, until you go to put him to bed, and he's up and running loops around you for hours.
basically, he was the perfect cuddle buddy, but he was also a ticking time bomb, because its so hard to tell when he needed to be held and given down time/a nap (cause he was god awful if he was over tired), when he just going with being held, and when he just wanted to be held (against the better judgment of his sleep schedule).
#this just feels correct#like spider just has mushy clingy baby vibes#but also hyperactive adhd baby vibes#this is the middle ground#and I love it#avatar 2#spider socorro#miles socorro#miles spider socorro#he definitely put norm through it#and in my mama neytiri au#he definitely had neytiri wrapped around his little finger#she just can't put him down#not when he cuddles up to her so contentedly#jake was put through the wringer was norm refused to stop handling the nightmare that was a hyperactive toddler spider#who refused to go to sleep#and was running around the lab screeching. getting into things. climbing things that shouldn't be climbed. etc.#live laugh love spider
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Why did Spike run like that 😭
#just running around and flailing his limbs around like a toddler#I can't imagine how fun it was for Billy to play Spike though#and the quality for this video is worse than the others so I think I'll find another way to record videos but for now this will do 👍#disney lab rats#lab rats#spike davenport#lab rats spike#lr clip
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When I was in high school I used to watch those Lifetime and Lifetime-adjacent movies after school
My favorite was one where a woman had a toddler but it died, I think it wandered away from her in the woods and drowned in a creek or something
A couple years later she has a new baby, but discovers the new baby is possessed by the spirit of the old baby that wants revenge on her for letting it die, so this woman spends the movie having beef with a physical and metaphysical baby
Because again this is not the spirit of a fully grown serial killer that possessed a baby with full adult sentience, this is a baby being possessed by a slightly older baby
I think in the end she exorcised the one baby out of the other baby but also died, which to me implies round two of Adult Woman Vs Baby but now on the baby’s home turf of the afterlife, but sadly we do not get that sequel
#it wasn’t even like Pet Semetary where the evil baby could do much I don’t think#I think they should have just let the evil baby stay honestly#I feel like it would be fun to have an evil toddler running around honestly
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You ever wake up from a dream so fucked that you have to sit there for 10 minutes after waking to rewrite the ending so that you can move on with your day or are you normal
#messages from knave#i keep having these ongoing dreams about an alternate reality version of my life#mainly about my parents#like right after i lost my job i had a dream that they'd moved to another state on a whim#and just told me to either upend my entire life to move to florida with them or figure it out#and i ended up moving into a much shittier apartment before realizing 'wait i have a whole house' and moving back into my own house in NJ#and then last night i dreamed I'd visited them and spent a day with my nephews then we all went to a wrestling match#and then after almost being run over by my dad cause he started driving while i was getting into the car#we go back to their house and i take a fat nap only to wake up in the dream and discover that I've disturbed this thumbelina sized toddler#that my mom jad apparentky adopted and then completely forgot about. and we wtruggled to getbit comfortable again on its little ved#then it escaped as toddlers do and i went through a comedy of errors trying to find it only to find it seemingly plastic and lifeless#only for it to start going through rapid metamorphosis into an adult and running around my parents house#my dad and i tried to stop it from growing up becuase every transformation opened up a new pocket dimension or something#then the dream changed into something else as my brain slowly booted back up from a migraine back into reality and i woke up#but the visage of a polly pocket sized toddler being left behind in my adult sized bed really shook me for some reason#it was so small and it was on a teeny pink pillow and it had a little purple teddy it kept dropping#but now I'm thinking of the logitstics of actually raising a child you could step on and squash by accident#that must be nerve wracking like how did thumbelina make it to adulthood without being confibed to a single room or even a single table#cause my first instinct is to build a diarama on a table for them and never let them leave until they're old enough to dodge
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adhd hitting hard rn. i feel like my head is one of those kids toys w the balls in them that rattle when you walk it around. hold on. ok this thing i feel like this is what my brain is
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