#no spoiler pls girlies be kind with me

[anty-gone]

I love The Locked Tomb fandom because no matter how many spoilers it throws at me, plot is so fucked up I can't comprehend them until I'm actually reading it (and even then, half of the time I need to open up the Wiki to understand what the fuck is actually going on).

[sapphicmsmarvel]

cassian x reader: dating a high maintenance girlie

Hello, if this seems extra its cause it is but this is quite literally my high maintenance routine. This is just one of my favorite parts of life and I love the idea of these big burly men doing skincare with their girls. 

i’m a high maintenance girly bc i like to be. pls this isn’t a pick me bullshit type thing. Im a girls girl yall. 

-This man doesn’t know shit about self care. 

-He knows the basics but like, nothing that would genuinely make him feel comfy in his own skin even more than he already is. 

-He uses 3-in-1. Technically 4-in-1 because face wash is separate formula than body wash but you digress. 

-Y'all know that stereotype of a guy glowing up after getting a girlfriend? You guys were the blueprint for that. 

-You taught him his hair type (2A), his skin type (dry), his preferred scent profile for himself (spicy, woody, aromatic). What his favorite types of care products are, he loves leave-in conditioner, cream cleansers. He’s not a fan of super heavy moisturizers because he’ll get overstimulated.

-These are just things this man has never thought about. 

-When you two leave the house for a Court Duty, you end up doing Cassian's hair. He wants to look nice, for lots of reasons, but especially because he wants to be let back into Summer. He wants to be able to take you on Summer Court dates! 

-He lives for that sliver of time you’re able to squeeze in before going somewhere. You doing his hair, him staring at you in the mirror if you’re behind him. If you’re in front of him, his large hands on your plush hips as you bite your lip in concentration trying to make his wild hair look nice. The feeling of your fingers through his scalp and how even when there’s a knot, you never tug or pull hard enough that it hurts him. You’re gentle and sweet with him even when he thinks he doesn’t deserve it (spoiler: he always deserves it) 

-He loves how high maintenance you are, it helps him remember to take care of himself. 

-You do a little self care sunday reset type of thing. It helps you get ready for the week. 

-He finds these routines utterly fascinating. 

-He begs to watch you do them, not even in the dirty way but it's just so interesting to watch. You also banned him from getting frisky when you do the routines. This was your time, he was welcome to watch but he would step out if you asked because you needed to be alone. 

-Some days, your routines are a bit more intense, such as the monthly waxing for your legs and armpits. Coochie too. 

-He flinches every single time he watches you wax some part of you, especially the coochie. He kind of has an attachment to that part. 

-You do the whole shabang sometimes. Wax legs, armpits, etc. Exfoliating shampoo, regular shampoo, conditioning mask, conditioner. Then the body stuff, exfoliating, shaving any parts you didn’t want to wax, double cleansing your body with antibacterial then the fun scented stuff. Then when you’re out of the bath, face extractions, face wash, whatever else you want to add. And then body creams. Then you’re done. 

-He’s just amazed every single time. 

-He also loves that you make a little thing out of it. You make it fun for you. There's a whole closet filled with different scents, treatments, formulas, etc. 

-You always smell good. There are deodorants shoved in every single bag you own, every room for that matter. Massive perfume, bodycare, candle, anything that makes a room or you smell good, you have it. 

-Even going to bed, you put perfume on.

-He loves that you say “I only wear it for myself Cass, it’s just a bonus that you love it.” Because he knows it’s true. 

-Sometimes he goes in just to sniff around. The fool just stands there and sniffs stuff. You had no idea why he decided to sit in the closet and sniff things in the dark. However, you did know that when you opened the door to see a nearly 7 foot tall clown smelling your beloved collection, you screamed bloody murder. 

So loud Azriel came running with his knives. Cassian just looked at you like “what’s your deal bro?” 

You were trained by two of the most powerful warriors, yet your first reaction was to scream. 

“Why didn’t you try to fight me?” Cassian asked, “I’ve seen you kick someone down for less.” 

“I am in my bathrobe Cassian! You want me swinging my legs around with my flaps out?” 

Azriel chose to leave the room after that. 

-You also always have perfectly manicured nails. And somehow someway you taught your tricks to the Valkyries so now they are able to have beautiful nails while still disemboweling enemies. 

-Great, now he and Az have four she-devils with perfectly manicured nails and glossy hair that can slay their enemies with one swipe. The four of you were feral together. He wouldn’t be surprised if he walked into the camps one day to see some guys dead because they were sexist. 

-You also got him and Az roped into these skincare nights. 

-He loves sitting there with a face mask on and you using one of your crystal rollers rolling it onto his skin. Bougie bitch eats it up. 

-One of your favorite things to do is wear a sheet mask and hide in a closet.  Scares him every single time. 

-Your stuff is everywhere, you’d be damned if you were uncomfy in your own home. After talking to Cassian and Azriel to make sure you weren’t being a shitty roommate, you kind of went crazy. 

-Lip balms in every room, hand creams, candles. Hair ties and claw clips. Fuzzy blankets stashed in every trunk you could find. 

-Rhys made fun of it, but ate his words pretty quickly when Feyre saw the beauty of having lip balms and hair ties/claw clips stashed everywhere. (and he later found the joys of said products and gave you a gift basket as an apology….you didn’t even remember that he judged you because you simply didn’t care).

-Also, the guys live in fucking luxury. The home always smells good, they never have to worry about chapped lips or dry skin. Or pesky hair in the way. Anywhere they want is a blanket or cute pillow to prop their heads up. 

-they were living like animals until you showed up.

-Cassian having a mate is the best thing to ever happen to Az. 

-Feyre, Nesta, Elain, Emerie, Gwyn, Morrigan and even Amren shop your stash of body care if they wanna smell a certain way for a certain fun time (wink). 

-Even Nuala and Cerridwen will approach and ask you. Obviously you say yes. You own so much you’ll never get through everything in time. 

-Plus you’re a Girls Girl. You’re gonna be there for your girls in your life.

-Speaking of the ladies in your life. 

-When you and Cassian have twin baby girls, you were ecstatic. Either way you were going to be happy but you always wanted a girl and now you have two!

-Teaching them how to take care of their skin and hair has been the best for you and Cassian. He loves watching his girls play with their hair. He loves having his hair braided by them. 

-Family self care nights become a Thing (that sometimes an Uncle or Aunt will join).

-He loves you because you taught him how to actually care for himself and his mental health. You showed him how he needs to stop and appreciate the smaller things. That not everything has to be a chore. 

-He loves you more than anything, maintenance and all.

[cowboylikeyouu]

intro post ⭐️

welcome :)

i used to be a german law student, but then i quit on a random tuesday & now i'm a full time fangirl until i go back to uni in october 2025!! my goal until then is to finish writing some long fics, but i'm a world class procrastinator so i can't promise anything.

💜fandoms💜

marvel (mostly mcu but i'm slowly working through some comics)

x-men

harry potter (both golden trio & marauders, although i'll always be more of a golden trio girly)

star wars (mostly og trilogy & mandalorian)

arcane

good omens (fuck neil gaiman)

our flag means death

IT

sherlock

-> i also started watching supernatural for the first time, so i'll probably talk about that as well, but pleeeease don't spoiler <3

💜ships💜

winterhawk

drarry

stony

dinluke

reddie

ineffable husbands

caitvi

gentlebeard

wolfstar

cherik

poolverine

any wlw ship that involves natasha romanoff but especially maria/nat/pepper

-> i'm a multishipper though, so you can pretty much talk to me about any ship, i can enjoy almost anything!! these are just my favs <3

the only exception is winterhawk, they're my absolute otp and i can't stand one of them being with someone else so please no ships involving clint and/or bucky except for winterhawk! especially no stucky.

💜other shows/movies i really like💜

how i met your mother, interstellar, shameless, hamilton, newsies, cats the musical, little women, httyd, dreamworks movies in general, disney animation, 10 things i hate about you, fleabag, scorpion, kingsman, the parent trap, dance academy, bojack horseman, she-ra, and a lot more !!

💜random things i love💜

coffee (comes with being a hawkeye stan)

the color purple (comes with being a hawkeye stan)

pizza (comes with being a hawkeye stan)

hozier

crocheting

funko pops

paulaner spezi

buying books & never reading them

cowboy like me by taylor swift

long hair bucky barnes

covering every inch of my room with posters & stickers

baggy pants

going to the cinema

long walks

all kinds of birds but especiall chickens & pigeons

most of my tags are pretty self explanatory i think, #tweet people w kindness has everything about my twitter fic and #first light everything about the winterhawk interstellar au i'm currently working on!

proshippers pls interact <3

[foundfam2754]

S17 e3 live reactions:

Obviously… spoilers

- okay from the first scene, JJ is def in danger

- WHAT? that’s not what I was not expecting as the secret

- okay Emily’s right not to stress them out so much but dang (this makes me think about the fuck ton of stuff that Em has to hide from her best friends/family and I feel for her so much)

- who do you think created the site?? Which Big Bad?

- BRIAN GARRITY??

- “that was fire…”, “helping is my kink” oh my god oh man I love you PG

- huh… unsub is younger than I thought he would be

- luke that’s already much more info than Emily said you could say

- JJ YOU ARE SO SMART, YOU ARE A BOSS BITCH

- aw poor bb Luke, he cares so much

- I really really like the Luke / JJ scenes, not a relationship they really explored before, so it’s refreshing

- Luke, sweetie, no kid in 2024 would rather juggle than watch TV

- argh I love Luke and JJ, but Sydney is kinda right 🙁

- “okay… we ready?” “we ready.” god I really love this team and how in sync they are w each other

- “Tyler Cannon” LMAO

- lol Tyler and Pen hooked up for three weeks why does she know so much about his bathroom habits

- hey Tyler! all this threatening you’re doing contains all VERY HELPFUL info to the team you’re supposed to be consulting with! maybe share it w them? aka pls stop lying bb

- I LOVE THAT PEN IS LEAVING HIM ON READ. YOU GO GIRL

- oh man I had my suspicions about holly :( poor girlie

- is it my TV or is the lighting in CME darker? bordering on hard to see??

-dang Keith woke up real quick from that poisoning, dude practically jumped up lmao

- tbh I still don’t really see the symbolism of the plastic wrap

-“I think I pulled everything” poor Papa Pasta

- I just realised that there is no garvez this ep :( I cri

- oh man JJ pls protect her let her be safe pls

- oh my god ew poor JJ, I wish we had Wilifer this season so she could go to will for support and he can be there for her if she needs not to be strong and needs to be vulnerable

- Luke is amazing, the best kind of friend.

- ADT product placement??

- okay I do enjoy pen and tyler banter but dude needs to learn some fucking boundaries

- *GASP* you do not evoke The Black Queen randomly it means something to her and he clearly does not respect that

- haven’t seen JJ this vulnerable and hurting in a while, :(((

- oh my gosh EMILY what the hell

- these endings are SO GOOD DANG, are they gonna cliffhanger every ep?

[murfpersonalblog]

IWTV Ep3 Musings - Claudia & Louis (Spoilers)

I'm still teary & choked up while typing this. SUPER emotional episode. It's incredible how much they packed into one ep, too! But the second half of the ep was BY FAR the most emotionally impactful IMO. Jacob's acting is just WAY too good; he had me choking up something fierce.

Louis taking pictures of his food for no effing reason like all the social media girlies do; I love it.

Louis STILL tryna be Claudia's knight in vengeful black. U_U But just like before when he tried to save her from Lestat, he can't save her from Bruce or the Theatre or even his own eff-ups. DANG. 😔

YES YOU DO. If you wanna keep pestering her about trauma she doesn't want to think/speak about, then be prepared for the consequences.

AMC, you GOTTA kill Bruce on-screen for us, either in QotD during all the Burnings, or during the PL trilogy (Killer's death was GNARLY).

LOOK AT MY DAUGHTER ALMOST CRYING RIGHT THERE. God's strongest soldier, she's suffered more than Christ, JUSTICE FOR CLAUDIA. All rapists deserve the death penalty, IDGAF.

Understatement of the century.

I CACKLED at that literal DEMON TIMING. Armand was already AT the door while y'all were concocting your lies! Then he just strolls on in, uninvited! 😭

BULLSH!TE. Not that it matters, since vamps have SUPER-HEARING and can READ MINDS, you morons! Pack your bags and go back to America RIGHT NOW. 💀💀💀

Louis, beloved, bless your heart, but if you don't take your garbage attempts at lying back to NOLA and stop playing with this ANCIENT immortal dressed in all white like the effing BOSS PIMP you USED to be.....

Alpha DADDY Maitre Armand Sir, I take back every bottom Uke Omega joke I ever said about you~! 😍

Yeah, about all that.... 😬

Aaaaannnnnd THIS is where you effed up, Claudia.

And Armand heard the WHOLE THING. 😭

Look at her FACE. 😭😭😭😭

They KNEW she hated being treated as a child, and they KNEW her time was numbered cuz she lied about breaking their Great Laws, so they DELIBERATELY made the "Baby LouLou" role to humiliate her, and EXPLOITED her image to bring in extra revenue (how many BLACK actresses did they ever have in their coven/stage? ZERO); all while KNOWING they were gonna kill her and Louis ASAP.

I hate this Theatre coven with ever fibre of my being, Maitre.

Excellent point, Louis. Cuz I noticed in Ep2 that their apartment is kind of crappy--I assumed it was cheap & low class cuz of the tenants all being college students & sex workers, and I noticed a bunch of chipped paint everywhere; on the doors & walls.

They're slumming it in a studio, sleeping in the living room, as neither has their own room & she has to use a Murphy Bed. Major step below 1132; the exact opposite of how book!Claudia & Lou lived in Parisian opulence--highlighting my point that AMC!Claudia got NOTHING out out being a vampire.

But it's also pointing out how Louis covers all the cracks--in his MIND, in the lies he tells himself, just to live with the glaring problems he desperately wants to cover up & deny.

I'm finna yeet myself out the nearest window.

This is SO bizarre, cuz in this version Lou KNOWS Lestat's not really dead! In the book Lou set him on FIRE. So ofc he'd think Les was really dead. But here it makes no sense why he's carrying all this guilt!

Armand knew Lou & Claudia LIED, sure--but he SHOULD know Lestat's still ALIVE--he's probably chained up in the Theatre basement in one of those friggin "wet room burial vaults!"

THANK YOU.

The guilt is out of control. Louis, if Les couldn't tell you loved him after ALL OF THAT, then he's a effing fool who neither understands nor deserves you. Now go chop his d**k off!

Is that what you tell yourself when DreamStat's in bed with you every night? ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

I haven't seen mental trauma treated so well in Horror media since Senua's Sacrifice; this is incredible. 👏

Lou, give yourself a bit more credit--you're doing the best you can! :( Even if your best is an entire travesty. U_U

NOBODY TALK TO ME!

Just when I thought she was having a breakthrough, she doubles down on thinking Lestat lied to them about Europe being terrible. 🤦

(The way Lou clutches his pearls like he's having a heart attack--STOP it, ma'am~! 👌) And YES, you should've told her that you folded and spilled the beans to Armand and that she was walking into a trap, WTF!?! 😡

Jacob, your GirlDad is showing; PLEASE have mercy on us! 😭

EMMYS. 👏 GRAMMYS. 👏 OSCARS. 👏 TONYS. 👏

[inthemiddle0feverywhere]

TBB Season 3 Episode 8 ramblings and scattered thoughts

And major spoilers below the cut

If you take Crosshair away from me (or this trio of Omega, Batcher and Crosshair) I swear to fucking God I will go insane and take everyone down with me. I don't think I can be a Star Wars fan anymore (I'll be devastated over any of them of course but I've been a crosshair girlie since "we don't usually work with regs *toothpick flick*)

Every time I see Batcher: Whose the goodest girl in the galaxy 🤗🥰

"Who?" *2 seconds later* "Who? "lmfaoooo I'm dead Crosshair's like how did you idiots meet so many women?

Also a pirate and a bounty hunter?? Cross is clutching his pearls! What kind of parenting is that Hunter??

Pheeeeeeee omg I cannot wait for Crosshair to officially meet her lmaooo

I hate Fennec (I don't actually, she's very badass but if she double crosses my boys I will hit her with my plastic lightsaber)

I love Wrecker being the voice of reason. He's not dumb at all and I'm glad they're finally showing this

space bayou 🐊

I really hate seeing tbb be mistreated and having to do all the shitty work like they're just trying to make it as civilians and keep Omega safe pls leave my boys alone!!

They need to learn how to negotiate with bounty hunters, implement a finders fee or something but they're too good and too pure for this!!

“Seems like Omega got away from you too” hoW VERY DARE YOU 👊👊👊

"Well money isn't everything" "That's because you don't have any 💅” GIRL lmfaooo

“I’m not going to like this am I?” “You don’t like anything” *Batcher in his face* Except Batcher 🥰

Stoppppp them meditating!? I can't take this. The gentle touches I'm gonna throw up

“You missed a lot” “I know 😔” 😭😭😭😭

Who are you talking to Fennec Shand?!?! Bitch I swear to god!

Also sometimes crosshair’s burn scar doesn’t look very deep and intense but some of these closeups???? Man it looks so painful some of those “holes” for lack of a better word look so deep too like it burned down to his skull. I’m honestly surprised his ear is in tact

[milliesfishes]

this will probably be so boring but I gotta share it with u millie mouse

how do you feel about coryo and billy with a girl who is really masculine? or at least a bit androgynous? a girl who likes wearing 'boy clothes' and is generally inclined to everything considered masculine? like for example she doesn't like having long hair and wearing dresses and all that.

(pls I'm not saying being a girly girl is a bad thing!! I love you girly girls, you're awesome and beautiful)

because I honestly think coryo wouldn't like it. at least not at first. he wouldn't even look at a masculine girl. but maybe he is kinda forced to interact with her for some reason and suddenly starts liking her. I also think he would fantasize with the idea of changing her. he would love to become so influential in her life that she's willing to change herself for him (spoiler alert: she wouldn't do it. but he likes to dream about it)

and billy would be sooo supportive of her fashion choices. he'd be like 'you can't wear my clothes, sweetheart' and when she's ready to protest he'd add 'because they're too big for you. let's get you something that actually fits you' and he'd buy her pants, shirts, suspenders, everything considered masculine. the whole situation would be weird for many people in that era but he'd feel so proud of her and would tell her all the time that she looks so pretty.

OHHHHHH I LOVE THIS SO MUCH ITS SO CUTE

I think it’s evident from my blog that I’m a girly girl but I think the masc girl style is SO COOL

Your take on Coryo is SO accurate I’m reeling…he would absolutely think he can change her and maybe one time he convinces her to wear a super fancy dress and he just falls out because she looks so beautiful. And then he’s constantly trying to get her to wear stuff like that more often

And you’re absolutely right about Billy, he’d be so sweet 🥹🥹 and AHHHH he would be so darling about letting her know how beautiful he finds her- like he LOVES how she looks in those clothes. And maybe if she feels insecure about liking that kind of stuff in a world where it’s frowned upon he’d reassure her really sweet :((

like he kinda makes a pouty face at her. “You look pretty. Besides it’s easier for me to do this” and he grabs her around the waist and picks her up so her legs are wrapped around his waist :(((

[starrynightsxo]

CARAVAL BOOK REVIEW

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️.5

So glad I finally read this as it was so so worth it! The plot was as interesting as I wanted it to be. Unfortunately, there was some problems with a physical copy so I was reading online which for this series I didn't particularly want to do as it meant I would be reading less often so it took me about a 2 months to read as I was reading a couple other books simulatenously (it was difficult)

Onto the book! So in of it itself, I loved ths inital concept of Caraval and I think that the whole execution was great. At point I feel I might've been a little lost but I ended up finding my way back which is the main thing! Scarlett was definitely a great main character and I'd be lying if said Tella didn't annoy me for the first half of the book (she got better later though, phew!).

Of course, Julian ♥️ we loved. I saw Scarlett and Dante for a minute but I then was instantly against. Forever a Crimson girly ♥️ (iykyk)

All in all, I really enjoyed the book and am excited for the next one, though I've been told it isn't as good, I'm going to try to keep spirits high!

Below the keep reading line is some spoiler thoughts and also includes what I didn't like about it (which is a spoiler so read at your own risk!!)

LEGEND. We don't see him at all and I feel like the random switch up at the end made me kind of annoyed but I also inderstood at the same time.

JULIAN. His age. That was a bit weird. Julian being legend's brother meaning his brother "dated" Scarlett's grandmother?? Gross 😭😭

Donatella's little switch up at the end was cute but I feel like at first I had a preestablished dislike for her because she was just a little bit selfish compared to Scarlett so I hope the next book makes me dislike her less. (anyone who has read pls lmk if you ended up liking/not liking her🙏🙏🙏)

[alfredo0724]

Tokyo Revengers Animal Crossing Headcannons - Toman Captains ver.

(This is entirely stupid and funny pls bear with me)

Slight manga spoilers below the cut

Takemichi, Mikey, Mitsuya, Pah, Nahoya, Kazutora, Baji

Coming soon: Toman Vice Captains Black Dragons Tenjiku Girlies

��──✱*.｡:｡✱*.:｡✧*.｡✰ ───

Takemichi

He is so messy pls

Weeds. Everywhere.

He would have cockroaches in his house and be too lazy to get rid of them

Broke. As. Fuck.

He spent all his money on the dumbest clothing options

Has some flowers around his island that Hina gave him

Likes to catch bugs but he sucks so bad at it

Has accidentally eaten fruit and destroyed rocks

Never picks up his shells either

His island doesn't really have a theme, just different kinds of furniture

Mikey

Fruit trees everywhere

Has the food themed villagers

Has all the silly 'tool' items like the glow-stick, poppers, etc

Constantly uses the emotes

Stupid idiot always runs on his own flowers by accident

Asked Mitsuya to design the toman jackets for him

Made his island flag a toman flag

Cooks the recipes but he forgets to keep up with his farm

Has a city themed island with a lot of the customized stalls

Mitsuya

Uses the designer pro like his life depends on it

He's that one try hard on Pinterest that has all of the ridiculously intricate designs

Avid path user

Has all of the cooking recipes and uses them regularly

Has collected all of the Labele accessories

Wears his own designed clothing

His farm is so organized

Gifts all of his villagers nicer clothes/accessories

His island is very elegantly themed

Uses shep's island to take photos of his villagers in outfits

Pah

Constantly visits Peh's island

Plays with his wife

The bugs freak him out even though they're in the videogame

Has a bunch of outdoorsy furniture

Constantly gifts his villagers

Re-designs his villagers houses

Has his beaches decorated

Loves swimming for the sea critters and puts them on display

Nahoya

Hits his villagers with axes and nets

Seriously they all hate him

Has a creepy apocalyptic themed island

He will steal your bell tree earnings

Will put holes in your island

Even has disturbing custom design clothing/face-paint

Will intentionally run on your flowers

Gifts his villagers the most disturbing clothing

Has the weird critters displayed on his island

Kazutora

Has all the tiger villagers

Animal print everywhere

Always at Chifuyu or Baji's islands.

Some weeds here and there

Has a tropical themed island

A lot of the fruit furniture everywhere

Also has some beach themed furniture

Goes to the mystery islands a lot

Baji

Best friends with all of his villagers

Made it his mission to complete the museum

Definitely has some of the critters out for decoration

Takes the fishing tourney very seriously

Has the animal themed furniture

Gives his villagers lots of fruits/foods

Has a mountain themed island with a lot of wooden and stone based furniture

Ceo of waterfalls

[goldyluna]

🍦, 🐝, 🧩 pls 💖💖💖

Love you 💖💖💖

Avo, u bitch.... I love you too <33

🐝: Tag your biggest supporter(s) and say one nice thing about them

I will start with this one✨

@avopumpkin you are the bestest bestie I could ask for <333 I love that you joined tblr and we can do even more stuff with each other! I think you are really talented artist — your art is adorable and your writing style is awesome. You are really creative, fun to be around and a really amazing person. Hope to see more stuff from you more often!

@starmoonlightfox you aren't active on tblr (I wish you were, bitch), but I always know I can count on you <33 You have an amazing art style and I always want to see more of your art! You are so nice and kind and talented and I love spending time with you. Talking with you is always fun :3

I might tag only two people that I feel the closest to in general as we are friends 8 years now. HOWEVER I also want to take this opportunity to thank all of my mutuals and other followers and people that follows my AUs like Purgatory Trials or Magica Goddesses!

I am thankful for all my tumblr friends that comment and reblog. That tag me in other posts and ask and just write and have fun with me! Even if we don't talk or interact much, I always have you all in my heart <3

Without you I wouldn't be here and maybe I would be discouraged to continue any bigger ideas I had. But the support I got, and am still getting, from you all is really making me wanna go forward and continue. I really appreciate you all! Thank you for being here with me <3

🍦: Name three good things about a character you hate

After more emotional question, let's go to the hated characters! There really isn't much characters I hate, more like dislike, aren't my favorite or are just so forgettable to me.

For this one I think I will pick Midori from yttd. As I dislike him very much, but also I think he is a great character so it is easier for me to appreciate him. IT MAY CONTAIN SPOILERS!

He is a great villainous Floor Master. In yttd we have a lot of those, but not all are so bad (in my opinion of course). Midori is a mence, but that's what is awesome about him. I love he is created to be like that — a rat of horrors. I love his "true form" and by saying that I mean his reval of being a dummy (and the trick with hand was fun in my opinion). I think he is great at being creepy and being everywhere. When he was Sou Hiyori I believe he had to be good at acting or, at least, making things work with how much he was present in all of our casts lives. I admire him for being able to pull it off. Like, go off girly pop, I guess? I can't think of anything more so that's the end of Midori appreciation post.

🧩: What will make you click away from a fanfiction immediately?

And the last question!!! It is a really interesting one.

I think the most fics I stopped reading because the level of ooc-ness was toooo high. Like, the mischaracterization was so unreal it made me cringe. I am all for artistic freedom, I myself make some characters a little ooc sometimes, but when I see some people make characters so unbelievable that they just becoming an OC with the same name (or even not if it is a genderswap).

I don't like when something isn't in the tags. I don't like some kinks and reading them recoil me physically — I don't kinkshame, people can like whatever they want, I like some but dislike others. Usually, I can filter everything I don't like and I don't feel like reading. Whatever if it is a sexual stuff or something different. But it really irks me when something isn't tagged and then is in the middle of the fic. Sometimes, I don't mind, I pull through, but sometimes it destroys the fun I had.

If I had to tell what makes me to click away from the fic before I even start it, it is definitely the formating, grammar and style of writing. It is really subjective, but all of this question is so whatever. What I mean by all that is. Everything is written in lowercase (I just really dislike it in fanfiction, you can write like that everywhere else — blogs, chats, random notes — but it is really discouraging me to read a normal work). Grammar is really important to me and was learning English so much in school. It is really not fun to read all the mistakes. It usually isn't a big deal for me if it is not all the time, I just roll my eyes. Bad style is bad for me when I see that the person is really inexperienced. AND IT ISN'T A BAD THING IN ITSELF!!! We all have to start somewhere, try ourselves and see what other people think and if they have some advice. It is a different thing if all of those things are put together and it is just really unenjoyable reading time. Some maybe can do it and then say some constructive criticism, but I usually just click off.

And I thinks that's all. But oh boy, this post is really long post already so it better be all lol

[tsuki-sennin]

Disaster has struck! A silver-colored imitation of God Kuwagata has taken control of King-Ohger! Confusion, joyfulness, and now fear has overtaken the people of Shugoddam as Gira's reputation tanks once more. Racles's machinations and the sudden aggression of God Scorpion have now completely solidified Gira's image as an insurrectionist. Now yet more baffled than ever before, Gira stands by himself in the night air...

Hoohoohoooooo boy, Spoilers, I guess...

-"OH GOD, I'M A REAL CRIMINAL NOW!?"

-From one CGI shot to another.

-"Those vile Bugnarok!"

-Hail Britannia, huh Racles?

-He doesn't need the other royals anymore.

-I have to give Racles credit, he's a legitimately scary villain.

-Oh goddammit Kaguragi, what're you trying now?

-Rita's just like "This is between you two, I'm just arbitration".

-Doctor of Engineering vs. Doctor of Medicine.

-Oh hello, Dezzy. Kamji.

-Gundajim?

-Ant!

-The manhunt begins.

-Kogane's a good friend.

-I'm assuming Gundy here's our second general.

-Man... there's something so cruel about hearing a kid admit he can't see a Red get out of this one.

-I see Kaguragi's kindness isn't just limited to his subjects.

-The girlies are fightingggg!

-Yanma doesn't need chairs.

-Oooooh... Parents, eh?

-Kami Ikari...

-It was never natural.

-That's a whole ton of locusts!

-What happened that day, fifteen years ago, Himeno Ran will never forget. After all... it was the day her mother and father died. In the haze of fire throughout Fraputal, medics and grieving families hurriedly ran through the shaking hall. Off to the side, by a fallen pillar and a bouquet of flowers, a young blonde-haired girl was tending to a wounded maid, her eyes occasionally glancing over to her parents. Luminaries of the world, both as doctors and rulers. It was only natural she'd do as they ask. ...perhaps by that same logic, it was only natural they'd not live to see the end of the disaster. As Mama and Papa writhed out their last breath, the hooded figure walked off. She was certain she saw them sneer as they latched onto the Shugod.

-Scorpion venom.

-Revenge ain't gonna help them now.

-"You know what, yeah! I wouldn't know!"

-"Keep working. We're taking out this trash."

-Oh fuck, Kabutan.

-Ooogh

-Beeg Bugs

-"Move it, maggots!"

Yanma: Where the FUCK is he?! Himeno: How should I know!? If Gira had any sense, he'd be out of Shugoddam! Gira: Sasoriiiiinne!

-"Shut up, you stupid bitch! Hi-yah!" (smack)

-They wouldn't tell him :<

-Nice dodge!

-Teamwork~!

-Yaaaay!

-Yanma :)

-Besties~!

-"Huh? ...HUH?!"

-"You leave me out of this, Geeks of Evil!"

-The Gods have come back~!

-Back to kicking ass we go!

-Here comes the queen!

-The sheer audacity Himeno has is absolutely admirable.

-"Oh hey Sasorinne, what's up?"

-Time for the queen to take center stage.

-For a terrifying gigantic robot scorpion, Sasorinne is quite adorable.

-"Soooo... are you dating~?"

-Can't ask for a better wingwoman than the queen.

-Let's do it!

-God Scorpion!

-Scorpi?

-Hm. Good for them.

-We did it!

-Rest in peace, Gundajim. You were kinda funny, and your salute shall not go unappreciated.

-Thank you :)

-Ahem, oh noooooo! He's gooooone!

-Oh well, at least we're better friends now :)

-Oh no

-Rita bby pls

-So like

-Is Racles gonna slaughter all of these children if Gira doesn't do the duel? That's pretty low, even for him.

-Oh shit, Racles!

-SIlver Bug~!

-Ohkuwgata Ohger.

-He really wants you to know he's the king, huh?

[fbfh]

rocks at your window pt. 4 - ricky bowen x reader

disclaimer: this series contains smut and chapter by chapter warnings, so as with all nsfw works, ricky is aged up to 18+!! ricky and reader are 18 and in their senior year

additionally, we're working towards a ricky x therapy plot so he's going to start expressing some symptoms of mental illness and bpd starting in this chapter but I promise he does get therapy eventually and has a good support system (he gets worse before he gets better yk) and obviously i'm not a professional and this is for entertainment so while I have done my research pls take this with a grain of salt!! or several!! /lh

!! contains some spoilers for season 1 of hsmtmts, and previous chapters of this fic !!

wc: 11k I know

genre: smut, slice of life/coming of age, one sided pining, fluff

pairing: ricky bowen x (afab she/her) reader

warnings: NOT PROOF READ AT ALL, more facebook messanger texts we'll politely pretend aren't facebook messanger, protecting carlos and seb during hoco (+ one use of the word homophobia), you're the dolly levi of the friend group, a LOT of hello dolly references??, TOOTH ROTTING FLUFF, ricky's falling HARD, antagonist!nina, one sided rina angst (like BIG gina angst), big red is ricky's temporary therapist, ricky has bpd, ricky kind of splits on gina??, ricky has anxiety too, dr phil and big red and natalie's emotional support hamster are the only consistant things in anyone's life, drama/general messiness, oral (m + f recieving), sneaky quiet late night don't wake up the parents sex, making out, ricky thinks you smell so good he has to bang you right now, "stay quiet or I stop", switch!ricky, switch!reader, calling ricky a good boy, praise kink, giggly sex, waking up the morning after to an empty bed but not at all on bad terms (and no ghosting)

summary: ricky works up the guts to ask you to homecoming. if you can navigate all the drama, maybe he'll get to rearrange yours after dancing together all night.

song recs: old friend - mitski, 10 minutes ago - cinderella (1997), dancing - hello dolly (1969), in love on valentine's day - paul sandrone, daniel farrant, james knight (spotify link bc it's literally not on youtube??? tracking down this song was a nightmare /lh), you turned the tables on me - billie holiday, born to be brave - nico iaciancio cover (bc that's what I think the original sounds like in canon), soulmate who wasn't meant to be - jess benko, perfume - new hope club

a/n: could I have split this up?? yes but I'm not going to. also congrats 2 me bc I'm officially in the 10k one shot girlie club!! this is the longest thing i've ever written and my eyes are burning. ricky has bpd, I knew from the moment I saw this motherfucker I was like "yup bpd and mommy issues" and I was RIGHT why is no one talking about this also go watch crazy ex girlfriend

EDIT: I FORGOT TO ADD THE LINK TO THE VAMPIRE DIARIES VIDEO YOU REFERENCE IN THE BEGINNING (obvious spoilers for vampire diaries lol)

tags: @yesv01 @afidiofobia @aliyahsutherland @hopefullhearts @afidiofobia @aliyahsutherland @matiere-detoiles @ifilwtmfc @uselesssapphickitten @nxstalgicnxbxdy @ggclarissa

There’s no reason to be nervous. Ricky has literally no reason to be nervous. You’ve been together practically 24/7 since… all this began. He ducks his head down and his eyes land on the smooth counter top of the booth you’re sitting in. Heat rushes to his cheeks as it so often does around you, as he remembers all the time you’ve spent together. He tries to pay as much attention as he can to your summary of the video essay on vampire diaries you’d watched while doing homework last night, even though his thoughts are racing, and all centered on you. On asking you something really important - but also like, totally not a big deal or whatever.

“So apparently they just regularly bring characters back from the dead,” you inform him with a laugh, and take a sip of your coffee. He didn’t think people could look particularly cute while sipping something until he met you… until he got close with you. 

“Yeah, that’s pretty crazy,” he agrees, hoping he sounds normal. You glance up at him to make sure he’s okay. You can tell he seems a little distracted, and he knows he has to ask you. It’s now or never. 

“So…” he begins.

“Yeah?” you lean forward, already invested in what he has to say. God, he loves that. He loves the way you care, really care about what he has to say. He lets out a small, breathy laugh, that you mirror when you hear his.

“So, homecoming is soon,” he smiles, and is pretty sure you know where he’s going with this. Your eyes widen in moderate surprise.

“It is? Already?” you ask, pulling out your phone to check your very messy calendar. “Jesus, I thought we still had a few more weeks…” you muse, and Ricky smiles. God, how can you make everything - even being a little scatterbrained sometimes - so fucking cute? 

You look back up from your phone, snapping him back to attention. His breath is shallow.

“So…” he says again, and rubs the palms of his hands up and down his jeans. Why is he so nervous? He has no reason to be nervous. You’re silent, waiting for him to continue in a way that feels patient, encouraging even, instead of critical like it would be from someone else. 

“...Do you want to go? To homecoming?” 

His heart is in his throat.

“Like, together?” You take another sip. He’s so choked up, so worried you’ll say no. He nods. You smile. 

“Hell yeah,” you lean back and pull out your phone to text your mom, who is currently at a PTA meeting, about dress shopping this weekend, biting your lip as you type. Relief turns to elation as you discuss plans, coordinate rides with your friends, and get a plan together. He bounces his leg, getting really excited for all this. He’s never been one for school dances, but with you… it’s a whole different story. He can’t stop looking at you. 

“So, what color is your dress going to be? You know, so I can get a tie to match.” A light, happy chuckle dances across the table and you hum in consideration, glancing down at the scone in your hand, your favorite flavor that’s become somewhat of a signature with you and Ricky.

“Peach.” 

You both giggle.

“Perfect.” he smiles. You’re going to look so pretty in a peach dress. At homecoming. With him. A burst of kinetic energy waves through him at the thought. The atmosphere is nice, comfortable. It always is with you. You finish the bite of pastry in your mouth.

“You know,” you start, “maybe you should go suit shopping with your dad. It might be nice to have a guy’s day together.” 

His mom has been gone for a few weeks now, and he told you how badly his dad is struggling. He means well, it’s just… been hard on him. It might be nice, he thinks, really nice to go out and spend some time with his dad, have some fun. He doesn’t remember the last time they had a day like that together. He’d really like that, if his dad wanted to.

“Yeah,” he agrees, wondering when a good time to bring it up will be, “that would be nice.” 

Around the time you’re ready to head home, your phone lights up with a text from your mom, informing you everything at the PTA meeting went great, and she’ll fill you in on the details at home, and you thank her, informing her there’s a hazelnut coffee coming her way. 

It’s Friday night, and you have less than 24 hours to homecoming. You’re not sure how you were able to find a dress you actually like in the right color on such short notice, but somehow you managed. You and Ricky have been texting all day, filling each other in on how last minute shopping had been going for each of you. He was shocked at how well today went with his dad. He was bracing himself for the worst for a lot of the afternoon, but the day progressed and nothing bad happened. They even got dinner afterwards. 

Now, you’re sitting at your desk, finishing some homework while you facetime each other and fill him in on the whole cast’s plan to be there for Carlos and Seb tomorrow night. 

“And, like,” you continue rambling as you wrap up your science worksheet, “it’s so ridiculous that that’s even necessary, you know? Out of all the living things in the world, humans are the only ones who thought to make up homophobia.” 

“Right? Worst idea ever,” he muses. 

“Exactly!” you exclaim in agreement, looking up at your phone. You mutter something about how stupid people can be, eyes moving down and skimming your paper, double checking your answers one last time. Ricky watches you do this. Your desk light casts a warm glow over you, and he can see some of your posters on the opposite wall from  where you have your phone propped up. He knows exactly which ones they are, too. He has every detail of your room - and of you - memorized by now.

He’s supposed to be finishing his english homework, that’s the whole point of facetiming each other this late, to keep each other company while you work. Instead his papers lay discarded on his desk as he watches you, a look of fondness dusting his face. You tap your pencil against each question on your worksheet, eyebrows scrunched, mouthing the answers to yourself as you go. Occasionally you’ll stop, turning to your book to check a chart or vocabulary word, then erase your answer and select a different one. 

“And that’s why we proofread,” you mutter to yourself, and Ricky giggles. You look back up at him, smiling, then back at your paper for one last once over. 

“Okay, I’m just about done,” you say, putting your homework in your bag to turn in later, with a satisfactory sigh. Ricky glances at the time. It’s getting late already. He’s torn between wanting to make sure you get enough sleep, and wanting to talk to you all night. He watches you rub your eyes, suppressing a yawn. 

“We should probably go to bed now,” it’s more of a question, but you agree anyway. You pick up your phone and walk into your bathroom, grabbing your toothbrush as you say your drawn out good nights. 

Ricky thought he was nervous asking you to homecoming? Turns out that’s nothing compared where he is now, waiting for you in your foyer. Somehow your house had become the unofficial get ready spot for the girls and Carlos, and meet up place for everyone else. So that’s where Ricky finds himself, barely unable to socialize or talk with his friends, all his thoughts preoccupied with you. He hasn’t seen you all day; you and the girls have been getting ready together, and he’s been trying to teach Big Red to dance all day. 

Ashlyn comes down first. Her bubbly presence immediately eases some of the tension in the atmosphere from Ricky and EJ having to wait together in such close quarters. She waits with them for the others while they finish getting ready. It doesn’t slip past Ricky how nervous Big Red suddenly gets when she comes down the staircase. 

Natalie is next - almost. Half way down the stairs, a snap resonates off the walls, and she freezes. She looks down at her left shoe, the heel of which has completely snapped off.

“Oh my god,” she mutters, and walks carefully back up to your room. A minute later, presumably after she informs you about her wardrobe malfunction, Ricky hears your voice, faint and bouncing off the stairwell. 

“It’s okay, that’s the risk you take with stilettos,” you say, trying to calm her justified panic. He hears you say something about how Margot Robbie broke a heel at an award show a few years ago as your bedroom door closes again. 

The door opens, and Carlos appears at the landing. His face falls slightly as he realizes Seb isn’t here yet.

“It’s okay, he’s probably going to meet up with us at school.” Ricky comforts. 

“Yeah,” he agrees with a laugh at his own nervousness, “yeah, you’re probably right.”  Carlos takes a deep breath, and Ricky notices the swirly, metallic red pattern on his suit. 

“You look great, man,” He says, hoping to take Carlos’s mind off the unexpected radio silence from Seb. The comment is appreciated, but seems to catch him off guard. 

“Thanks,” he replies, “dude,” he punctuates with a friendly - very awkward - punch to Ricky’s arm. It’s more of a nudge, but he appreciates the sense of comradery nonetheless. 

Footsteps echo down the stairs, and Ricky looks up, stomach twisting in anticipation. Natalie emmerges, much more carefully this time. She greets everyone, then starts talking to Ashlyn about the shoe incident. Ricky is trying really, really hard not to look like he’s waiting for you, but it feels almost impossible to focus on anything else. 

Finally, several painfully long minutes later, he hears the click of high heels approaching the steps. He walks to the bottom of the stairs, heart thumping as you round the corner, and all the breath is pulled from his lungs at the sight of you. You descend the stairs, hair and dress flowing and bouncing with every step, glowing under the chandelier light. Your dress, mid length and flouncy, a peachy champagne that compliments your hair and skin tone perfectly, shimmers subtly when you move, glistening like starlight. 

Your makeup is understated and glowy, bringing out every beautiful feature you have - which is all of them. Your hair is perfect, glossy and voluminous. Your earrings look like little pink silk flowers, and there are matching, larger silk flowers on the side of your heels. Your nails are manicured a soft peachy pink, with little sparkling accents. You even smell like peaches, he realizes, subconsciously taking a step closer to the bottom of the stairs as you get closer. You seem to descend in slow motion as Ricky takes in every detail.

Your expression mirrors his the moment you see him. You did not expect him to look that good in a suit. It couldn’t fit better, the cut and seams of the dark fabric perfectly accentuating his physique. His tie matches your dress, the same shade of peach, and you bite back a smile. The expression on his face can only be described as a breathless wow, and it’s something you'll never forget. Your cheeks are warm and suddenly it all feels real. You find yourself very excited to have fun at homecoming with him tonight. 

You finally float down to the bottom of the stairs, stopping in front of him. It’s quiet for a moment, as you take each other in, face to face. You’re both struggling to find the words, thrown off guard by the energy in the air, by each other. Behind you, Ashlyn claps awkwardly.

“Alright, everyone ready to go?” 

You and Ricky both giggle at the same time, and his chest warms at how in sync you are. 

“Yeah,” You confirm, smiling over at Ashlyn and grabbing Ricky’s arm in a way that makes his heart palpitate, “let’s go.”

Standing with you on the dance floor, his hand on your waist as you attempt to teach him how to waltz, Ricky is so thankful for homecoming, for an opportunity to be close to you like this. 

“I told you,” he laughs, enamored with your optimistic determination, “I can’t dance.” 

“Yes,” you smile, “you can. You just haven’t had the right teacher.” His cheeks flush at your words, the feeling of your hands on his, and he’s hit with the sudden memory of the last time your lips were on his neck. 

“I think you’re probably right about that…” he mutters under his breath. You bite back a smile, adjusting the position of his hand on your waist. You step closer, and his heart beats faster. He watches your face closely as you explain the basics of a waltz, a box step. 

“Like in ‘Dancing’ from Hello Dolly.” you smile, eyes widening at the blank look on his face. “Oh my god, it’s a musical classic! Carol Channing played Dolly in the original broadway cast in ‘64, then Barbra Streisand in the film adaptation in ‘69.” 

“Wow,” he smiles. He loves when you talk about theatre and Broadway, loves the way your eyes light up. “They’re like, really famous, right?” You let out a light hearted scoff.

“Broadway legends.” You smile, “The movie was directed by Gene Kelly, too, it’s amazing. We should watch it this weekend, if you want to,” you look up at him, eyes glittering under the soft twinkling lights. 

“Yeah,” Ricky laughs, “definitely.” 

After a moment, you remember why you brought Hello Dolly up in the first place. 

“Right,” you say, memory jogged, “there’s a song called ‘Dancing’ where Dolly is teaching Cornelius and Barnaby how to dance so they can impress these girls who work at a ladies hat shop-” 

“Cornelius and Barnaby?” he asks with a laugh. 

“It takes place in 1890!” you say, jokingly defensive. 

“Right,” he agrees, “so a… ladies hat shop…?” 

“Totally era appropriate.” 

You’re both giggling, trying not to be too loud. You lean your head forward, resting it on his shoulder. The sound of your laughter, the feeling of your head resting against him brings back that warm feeling he always gets around you. It takes you a moment to regain your composure. It’s been like this all night, the conversation flowing like a river, always making each other laugh over something or other. 

“So,” you begin, once again ready to dance with him, “put your hand on her waist and stand.” You recite, moving his hand from your back to your waist and adjusting your posture. 

“With her right-” you hesitate, making sure you have the correct hand, then continue, “in your left hand. And…” You step back with your left foot, motioning for him to follow, then back and out with your right, then together. 

“One… two… three…” 

You repeat the steps.

“One… two… three…”

And again.

“One… two… three…” 

You look up at him, your smile blinding.

“Look, you’re dancing!” 

He looks up at you, excited, disbelieving that he got it so quickly.

“Wait, that’s it?” he asks quietly.

“Yeah,” you nod, “see? I told you you can dance.” You start to move again, and he follows, hesitant but slowly getting the hang of it. After a second, he says your name, voice quiet and still watching the ground. 

“Can you keep singing? It’s making it a lot easier…” he chuckles, hoping you can’t tell how much he loves hearing your voice. 

So you do. You sing quietly, just enough for him to hear, about dancing and how it’s the perfect excuse to hold someone you like close to you, as you waltz carefully around the room. An electric, intimate feeling ties you together as you weave through the room. It's like something clicked, he thinks, because it makes sense. This, dancing, makes sense. He’s pulled from his epiphany by your melodic voice. 

"We should do Hello Dolly, it would be so fun!" You giggle.

"Yeah?" He asks, smile mirroring yours, "Who would you play?" You let out a light hearted huff, considering. 

"I would love to play Dolly," you admit. You had always hoped to portray the classic role, dreaming of being able to follow in the footsteps of other iconic actresses like Carol Channing and Barbra Streisand. You barely get the sentence out when Ricky nods, agreeing. 

"You would make an amazing Dolly." You laugh, cheeks warm, flattered by his response. 

"Who do you think I should be?" He asks, that playful energy flowing comfortably between you as he raises his arm, spinning you around. 

"Well," you begin with a laugh, "if you played Cornelius we’d get to waltz together. But if you played Horace and I played Dolly we'd get married at the end." 

His heart squeezes at your words, imagination already taking off like a wild horse. Again, your melodic voice pulls him back down to earth. 

"But playing Irene would be fun too…" you sigh, twirling in his arms again, your dress glittering under the soft lights. Your hands return to their previous position resting on his shoulder and your waist, free hands clasped together, and you begin to move in tandem. You twirl and float around the room, feeling the music wrap around you like a warm blanket in autumn. 

In that beautiful moment between the two of you, he doesn’t just understand dancing, he realizes, he loves it. Like, a lot. He loves this, being close to you. He loves the connection between you, and he wants to keep dancing with you all night. 

He giggles, twirling you around in his arms again. On your way around, you see Carlos behind you at your table holding up his phone, a smile on his face. You’re glad he seems okay; Seb still hasn’t shown up and everyone’s been worried about both of them. A split second later, you’re back in Ricky’s arms, and your heart soars at the smile on his face. You’d been hoping dancing together at homecoming might help him in rehearsals. Based on how well he’s doing - and how much fun he seems to be having - you can tell your hunch was correct. 

After a few more songs, you begin to make your way back to your table. Ricky’s hand settles on your back, guiding you through the crowd. Two more people are seated there than when you left, and your eyes widen. 

“Oh my god.” you say quietly, “Gina and EJ came together?” 

Ricky glances up, gaze almost immediately turning back to you as you get closer.

“Oh, they did? I didn’t notice.” 

Fighting to maintain her poker face, Gina’s stomach drops at his words. Her eyes dart between you and Ricky, the way he’s looking at you. She grips her clutch tighter. This is really, really bad for her. Gina barely had a plan for making Ricky jealous and freaked out so he’d quit the show to begin with. She definitely did not plan on you waltzing into the picture - literally - and stealing away all of his attention. He can’t get jealous if all of his focus is on you. A sinking feeling begins to invade the pit of her stomach. 

Ricky’s phone buzzes with a text from his dad. 

“Hey,” he says, showing you the screen, “which shirt do you like better?” 

He’s been filling you in on his dad’s hot date he has tonight, and you’re both very relieved to see that he’s doing okay, putting himself out there. You look at the pictures, and consider.

“Hmm… the second one.” you conclude. 

“Yeah, that’s what I thought too,” he agrees easily. He loves how you always seem to be on the same page. 

“Wow,” comes EJ’s voice from across the table. He sounds really stiff. “I had no idea you were each other’s dates to homecoming.” He states, sharing a quick look with Gina he hopes no one notices. 

“Yeah, we are,” Ricky smiles, “we’re each other’s dates.” He doesn’t think it would be too far fetched to say you’re… dating. 

“Yep, partners in crime.” You smile, showing off your plastic ring. Ricky holds up his, kept on a chain, sitting right over his heart. 

“Aw,” Carlos says, an almost bittersweet undercurrent to his voice, “you guys are so cute.” He gestures for you to lean closer to each other. “Let me get a pic for my story!” 

Ricky does not need to be told twice. He throws his arms around you, pressing a kiss to your cheek as you hold his arm and giggle. It’s the perfect shot, the sincerity of the fun you’re having evident in the photo. 

Gina runs her tongue over her teeth. She really does not like that. 

Across town, sitting at a table in a shitty karaoke spot, Nina scrolls through instagram while Kourtney rants about the bitch who criticized her costume suggestions. Something about a lime green sweater? She’s not really paying attention, she’s too distracted by the hideous dress that Gina’s wearing. And the fact that she went to hoco with Nina’s ex boyfriend. 

“Look at this,” she says, showing Kourtney her phone. “She looks like she’s wearing a bedazzled tablecloth.” Kourtney looks at her phone, disapproval written all over her face. 

“And,” Nina says, gearing up to point out the obvious jab at her, “she’s with EJ.”

Kourtney knows where this is going. Before Nini can go off about how obviously Gina has it out for her, she takes a sip of her drink. 

“Is there anything on their stories?”

She taps EJ’s story and it’s just a boomerang of the food. 

“No, just-” Carlos’s story plays next and Nina almost pukes. Right there on her screen is Ricky, kissing your cheek, leaning into you like a cat. You’re in an unfortunately gorgeous dress, grinning so sincerely, your nose effortlessly scrunched. Next is a video of you two dancing. Like, really, properly dancing. She can’t believe you got him to dance - he doesn’t even dance in rehearsal when he’s supposed to! She watches the two of you ballroom dancing around the gym, breath speeding up slightly at the realization that he’s actually good. The sick pit forming in her stomach grows as she rewatches the video again. She wants to know why, after all the practice, all the failed attempts and his reluctance, why it works when you do it? Why isn’t she good enough? She dwells in the feeling for a few minutes. She scrolls through a few more hoco posts before finding one that has your account tagged. It’s private. 

“Kourt,” she says, showing her her phone, “you need to follow her.” 

“Why?” Kourtney asks.

“So I can see what’s on her instagram.” Nina says. She can’t let you know she’s lurking, so the obvious solution is to lurk through Kourtney’s account. Kourtney sighs. She requests to follow you. 

A few feet away from your table, Ashlyn gives you a look, gesturing subtly to Carlos, then to the hallway. Seb still isn’t here. 

“Hey,” you say quietly to Ricky, “I’ll be right back.” you smile, eyes flicking over to Ashlyn and Carlos. 

“Yeah, sure,” he says, watching you leave with them to give Carlos a pep talk. A soft smile kisses the corners of Ricky’s mouth, watching you in utter adoration. He lets out a small sigh, gaze lingering on where you stood even after you’re out of sight. 

Gina watches him watch you, his dark auburn hair glowing in the warm twinkle lights strung up throughout the gym. His eyes seem to sparkle with joy when he finally tears his gaze away, staring absentmindedly at the table. 

“EJ,” she says, “could you get me some punch, babe?” 

“Uh,” he says, clearly unused to the term of endearment, “sure… babe.” He heads over to the drinks, the tension between them thinly veiled. This seems to snap Ricky out of whatever his train of thought was, and he scoots closer to Gina. She watches him lean closer to her and begin speaking in a low, almost strangely intimate tone of voice. 

"Hey, you know EJ went through Nini’s phone before they broke up, right?” 

She raises her eyebrows. 

“Just… you know, be a little careful around him.” 

“I can take care of myself, Ricky.” She states incredulously.

“Yeah, of course you can.” he says, head tilted to the side with a little smile, like it should be obvious, “You’re so talented and ambitious, and - honestly, way too good for him.” He mutters the last part, but she definitely hears it. 

“You’re way too cool to get your heart broken by a guy who plays water polo.” He says, drawing a reflexive laugh out of her. 

“Just… take care of yourself.” he concludes, locking eyes with her before moving back to his seat. It’s only for a moment, but long enough for her to commit the color to memory.

“Right.” she says, working harder than she usually has to to keep her expression neutral. 

Later, between dances, you and Ricky catch your breath at the snack table. You take a sip of your drink, eyes landing on Gina and EJ, who are very obviously arguing. You nudge Ricky, motioning over to them.

“What are they saying? Wrong answers only.” 

He considers, then begins to narrate in his best EJ impression. 

“Ugh, Gina! Stop moving! I haven’t posted on instagram in 35 seconds and blurry so doesn’t fit my theme.”

You try to stifle the loud, beautiful laugh that brings warmth to his cheeks and a smile to his lips as your eyes lock, sharing a look so close he never wants to look away. 

“I said wrong answers only…” you say through muffled giggles. He stares at you, fixated. He’s blinded by your warmth, your beauty, and he can’t look away from you. His attention is snapped back to where it had been when you gasp dramatically, shock written all over your face. He follows your gaze to EJ, who’s dripping with punch, and Gina, who’s storming away from him.

“...Oh my god.” you say, already dissolving into laughter again, Ricky following suit. 

Soon you’re dancing again, pressed up against each other, swaying gently to the oldies playing softly over the speakers. Ricky can feel your body heat, smell your shampoo, and the way it mixes with your sweet peachy perfume. You smell so good, he thinks he could probably get high off you alone. His hand rests firmly on your back, holding you close to him, and his fingertips brush over the exposed skin peeking out over the straps of your dress. He traces your shoulder blades, your spine, feeling how close together your hearts are beating. One of your arms is wrapped around him, your head resting on his shoulder. Both your free hands are intertwined, and he loves the feeling of your fingers intertwining with his. He’s steeped in a hazy sort of ecstasy, spurred further on by your warm little breaths tickling his neck. 

He lets out a soft sigh, more content than he’s probably ever been. He feels you smile against his blazer when he traces the outline of the back of your dress. You hum softly to the music, singing along to a few of the words. He’s not surprised that you know this song, of course you would know a song this pretty and romantic. He hopes he’ll remember to ask you the name of it later. Dancing, he realizes, isn’t just fun - it’s amazing. He loves dancing. He loves dancing with you. After a few moments, he realizes there’s not many people on the dance floor. He doesn’t get why so many guys don’t like slow dancing; when you really love someone, isn’t any reason to hold them close to you a good one? He thinks it is. His heart flutters when you let out a breathy sigh against his skin.

You adjust your head on Ricky’s shoulder, watching Carlos across the room. He looks so… melancholic. You should go check on him. And Gina. And probably EJ. Christ, tonight has been a lot. You adjust your head again, facing towards him. 

“We should check on Gina,” you say reluctantly, murmuring into his ear, sending a shiver down his spine. He loves when you do that, loves how you know when people are hurting and what to do about it. But right now, he really, really does not want to let go of you for anyone or anything. Maybe it’s selfish, he thinks, maybe it’s selfish for wanting you all to himself like this, but he just can’t bring himself to let go of you yet. Maybe he deserves to be a little selfish sometimes. Maybe he should just give himself permission to do whatever makes him feel better. He holds you tighter, face burying into your neck. 

“After this song,” he breathes, eyes fluttering closed in your embrace. You nod gently.

“Okay,” you agree, voice so low he can barely hear it. 

Eventually the final piano chords sound, and he holds you tight as the last few, painfully bittersweet notes reverberate through the room. The song ends, and he lets go of you slower and more reluctantly than he’s done anything. 

You sigh, tracing your hands on his shoulders, slowly coming out of that cozy trance like state you’ve been in together.

“Okay,” you start, “let’s split up. I’ll check on Carlos, you can check on Gina, and I’ll have Ashlyn check on EJ cause they’re cousins.” 

He agrees, hit with a sudden wave of nerves about the confrontation. You can sense his hesitation.

“What should I say?” he asks, with a chuckle. He’d told you about how he warned Gina about EJ earlier in the evening, which you had agreed was totally the right move. He told you how she seemed irritable after the interaction, and wondered if he’d done anything wrong, if he could have handled it better. “I don’t think so”, you had said with a sad shrug, “some people just refuse to acknowledge the person they’re dating is kind of shitty.” 

You’re right, he realized, now ready to approach this with more compassion and less confrontation. You think for a second, then reply.

“You can apologize if what you said before came off wrong, that you didn’t mean anything bad by it.” 

“Okay,” he nods.

“And try to relate to her - you’re new to theatre, she’s new to east high, you gotta stick together, you know?”

“Right.” 

You send him a thumbs up as you part ways, looking for Carlos. After chatting with Carlos, he left to get some water. You see Ricky approaching you through the crowd, and stand up from your table, meeting him halfway.

“How’d it go?” you ask. He seems hesitant.

“She asked for a ride home.” Your eyes go wide with understanding. He knew you’d get what’s going on, you always know just what to do. 

“Oh, dude, the last thing she probably wants right now is to get in a car with EJ.” Ricky thinks that’s the last thing anyone would want. “If you want you can give her a ride, then come back and we can keep dancing.” He smiles, and agrees. Any plan that ends with dancing with you more sounds like a good plan to him. You quickly fill him in on how things are going with the Carlos/Seb situation in spite of its anticlimactic nature - no one can get a hold of Seb, and Carlos is really, really regretting this whole thing. You and Ashlyn are going to try and hype him up and turn the night around for him so it’s not a totally horrible memory to look back on, and Ricky agrees that’s a good plan. 

“I’ll be back really soon so I can help you guys out,” he says, hoping to extend the conversation a little, to stand close to you and talk confidentially with you just a little more. You smile, looking relieved at his support, and it makes his heart flutter. You touch his arm, sending him a knowing look.

“We need all the help we can get, so thank you.” you state with a chuckle. He tries not to be obvious, but he knows he can’t hide his flushed cheeks and dilated pupils. He hopes you don’t notice. 

You really didn’t expect to be the glue holding everyone together tonight, but you love your friends, so you’re not complaining. After a lengthy conversation with Carlos about how amazing he is regardless of who he is or isn’t seeing, and that there will be so many guys throwing themselves at him after high school, you finally get him out of his funk a little. You were about to go dance together and have a good time, because he shouldn’t let anything ruin his homecoming, when Natalie scurried over to you holding the side of her dress. 

“It snagged on the back of a chair and my whole leg is out, Angelina Jolie style.” She says in a rush, clearly getting more freaked out. You and Carlos share a look.

“It’s okay,” you say gently, “I have a sewing kit in my bag and I can have you fixed up in two minutes flat.” You look over at Carlos again, making sure he’ll be okay. He confirms silently, nudging you two towards the doors. 

“You go fix this wardrobe malfunction,” he says, already trying to pull out of the funk he’d been stuck in all night, “I’m going to warm up the dance floor. When you get back, get ready to dance your heart out.” 

He’s not all the way there, but he’s trying. You both agree, and you send him one last encouraging look before moving carefully to the hallway, trying not to let Natalie’s dress rip any more than it already is. You look back one last time as you pass through the doors, and finally, Carlos is out on the dance floor. You smile, excited to dance with him once you get back.

“God, I wish I had my hamster right now…” Natalie mutters, and you know if she needs her emotional support hamster, it’s pretty bad. 

A few minutes later, you have your sewing kit and Natalie’s dress is back to its former glory. She has on a fresh coat of lip gloss, just finished showing you pictures of her hamster, and is ready to head back out. You stay behind to touch up your makeup a little, telling her you’ll be right behind her.  As you’re walking back out, someone turns the corner at the other end of the hallway. You freeze in place, eyes growing wide as they land on none other than Seb. He smiles nervously, raising a hand to wave at you. Before he can, you let out a shocked squeak, scurrying back into the gym. His heart sinks. He hopes you don’t hate him, and he’s really worried Carlos is going to. 

When you enter, you see Carlos dancing his heart out. You don’t have time to be relieved, weaving your way through the crowd to Mr. Mazzara. You slam your hands on the table, avoiding the sound and light equipment he’s managing. 

“Mr. Mazzara!” He looks up at you, startled, as you begin to explain in a rush. He looks at you, a pleading puppy dog look written on your face, and sighs. 

“I suppose that’s fine…” he says, making a few adjustments to the switch board in front of him. 

“Thank you!” you say quietly, before running onto the dance floor. Carlos is finally in his element. He dances beautifully to the music, free and expressive. Right when the beat drops, a circle of spotlights go up. One lands on him, the other lands across the room on Seb, and they lock eyes in a moment that can only be described as magical. Ashlyn looks at the scene, straight out of a movie, then over to you. You high five her. 

“Nice!” she whispers. You can see it between them, the energy, the chemistry, the electricity. You look at Ashlyn, nodding toward your table. You both sit down, giving them some time to talk and catch up. You try to be subtle as you watch them talk, not close enough to eavesdrop, but watching their expressions, gaging how it's going. They're smiling, then they're laughing, and soon they're dancing together. It's going well, you think. You can't wait for Carlos to fill you in later. 

Sitting in Gina's driveway, a surprisingly more comfortable energy in the air than either of them had expected, Ricky tries to think of how to say what he wants to say. 

"Not quite the evil mansion with wrought-iron and gargoyles you were picturing?" She asks, a hopeful playfulness to her voice. She almost sounds nervous. 

"What? No…" he says. The comment takes him by surprise, snapping him back to attention. "...Well maybe some gargoyles." His joking tone and comforting energy has her giggling. She doesn't remember the last time she giggled. She feels his eyes on her, and tries not to look over at him. She does anyway. 

"You're not that bad, you know." He muses. She tries to control her breathing. She doesn't say anything. 

"Also," he continues, looking back over at the windshield, "I should thank you for that night at the skatepark, keeping me in the show. It means a lot, it's… a really big deal to me." He looks up and left at the top of the car window, mind already wandering about how if he had quit, he never would have gotten close to you like this, never would have fallen in… your arms the way he had that night. He can't imagine you not being in his life, and he has Gina to thank in part for that. He feels a sense of gratitude blooming for her. They talk a little more, and the feeling grows; Gina really is not that bad. He can feel a friendly bond growing between them, a sense of comradery. 

"So… now is probably a good time to ask about the whole drink thing," he starts with a chuckle. She ducks her head, equal parts embarrassed at her actions, and that he saw her at such a low moment. She lets out a sigh. The gesture reminds him of something you might do. He thinks you two would be good friends. He’s already imagining what you’ll say when he fills you in on all this, he’s excited to get your opinion. 

“...My mom moves around a lot for work. Like, a lot…” 

Once she starts, she can’t stop, and it’s not long before she’s unintentionally spilled her guts and her life story to him. She wishes she could stop talking, but it’s like she totally lost her filter with him. She’s always been so reserved, so calculated, and now she doesn’t even have time to think before the words are already spilling out. It’s a new feeling, being so candid with someone, and an unsettling one. 

She risks a glance over at Ricky, who’s just… listening to her. Taking in what she says. That somehow makes her more nervous than if he’d just ignored her or told her to shut up already. She wishes someone would tell her to shut up, she wishes she could. She finally gets to the end of her never ending stream of consciousness, and she’s stunned as they sit in the silence, Ricky really absorbing her words, her feelings. He reaches over and grabs her hand, giving it an encouraging squeeze before letting go - a mannerism he picked up from you. Heat floods her chest, prickly and almost painful, hyper aware of where his skin just touched hers.

“You know, you-” She’ll never know what he was going to say, his words are cut short by the porch lights flashing through the windshield. Gina’s stomach sinks. She doesn’t want to go inside yet. She doesn’t want this moment to be over, but she has to listen to her mom. She reaches for the door, then hesitates. She turns back to Ricky, desperate to try one more time, to put herself out there, to plant some roots. 

“I meant what I said at the skate park… about you having your own style.” 

He smiles, looking down with a breathy chuckle. His leg is bouncing slightly, he can’t wait to get back to school and dance with you more, spend the rest of this magical night with you. 

“Thank you, that’s-” He’s cut off again, this time by the kiss Gina presses to his cheek. She’s out of the car and inside before he can look at her face. She holds her coat tight around her against the chilly rain beginning to drizzle down, and a second later, the front door closes and she’s inside.He lets out another chuckle, different this time. ‘That was weird.’ He thinks. He barely has the thought before his stomach drops, a sick, cold fear clutching him. What if you find out Gina kissed him? What if you find out and you hate him, what if he breaks your heart into a million pieces without trying? Or worse, what if you lose interest in him because you think he likes Gina? He can feel himself panicking at the idea, unable to stop the onslaught of all too real feeling anxieties wracking his mind, creating a pit in his stomach as he peels out of the driveway and makes his way back to school. 

No, no, that’s not going to happen. He’s not going to lose you because he’s not able to express how much he cares about you. He’s not going to let that happen. Trying to hold this panic at bay, he pulls out his phone as he walks through the parking lot towards the school again. How to show someone you love them. He types the words into google, skimming article titles, reddit threads, quora responses, until he finds himself at the gym doors. He sees you across the room, dancing in a group with Carlos, Ashlyn, Natalie, and Seb. ‘Oh, Seb’s here. That’s good,’ he thinks, a momentary relief that at least one or two fires had been put out tonight. He spots Big Red on the opposite side of the room, and makes his way over to him carefully, trying not to be seen by you. He can’t be around you until he figures this out, he can’t hurt you like this. 

Ricky approaches Big Red with an intense energy he has trouble reading, before Ricky starts to speak. 

“Dude,” he says, voice intense and hushed, “Gina kissed me on the cheek.” 

“That’s great!” 

“No, it’s not!” Ricky says, clearly very frazzled. Okay, that’s where this is going. 

“That’s awful!” Red course corrects as Ricky fills him in on the car ride with Gina. As he tells Red everything that happened, Ricky finds himself kind of hating Gina right now. Why would she do this to him, why would she put him in this position? Does she hate him or something? He thinks she must, there’s no other reason for her to sabotage his relationship with you like this. She must hate him if she’s trying to ruin the most important thing in his life. 

“Listen, I really, really like her…” his eyes keep flicking over to you, gaze magnetized by your presence, “like, a lot. How can I make sure I don’t fuck this up? Because I can not fuck up with her.”

“Woah, man,” Red starts, trying to help Ricky ground himself a little, “chill out. In all fairness, cheek kisses can be platonic.” 

“Right,” Ricky nods, starting to feel assured, and Red continues. 

“So, if Gina wants to date you when you’re… kind of seeing someone, she has to make that more clear to you.”

“Right.” Ricky states, agreeing. He really hopes she doesn’t. 

“I think you’re okay,” Red says, sensing his energy changing already, “just make sure she knows how much you like her. Make it really, objectively obvious.” 

Yeah. He just has to make it obvious. 

“Yeah, you’re right,” he says to Red, his eyes locked on you as you laugh at something Carlos says, making his stomach twist and tingle, “I just have to make sure she knows how much… I like her.” 

Red watches him make his way over to you, a spring in his step and a plan in his mind. Thank god for Dr. Phil, Red thinks, or else there’s no way he’d be able to help his friends navigate all their drama. He chuckles at the thought, watching Ashlyn fix the strap of your dress. 

Ricky checks his phone one more time on the way over, looking over a chart of love languages one more time. He’s not sure what your love language is, so he’ll just have to try all of them and see what you seem to like best. Gift giving and acts of service aren’t really options right now, so tonight he’ll focus on words of affirmation, physical touch, and quality time. If he has to drown you in all five love languages at once to make sure you know how he feels about you, he will. 

“Hey,” he starts, watching your reaction nervously, scared you somehow already hate him. You turn around at the sound of his voice, eyes lighting up. 

“Hey!” you smile, “You’re back!” you grab his arm, pulling him in closer to the group. 

“Seb’s here,” you say, and he smiles, relieved at your reaction. 

“Hey, man,” he smiles. 

“Fill me in later,” you say quietly, referring to giving Gina a ride, and he nods, a little bit ready to forget the whole thing. 

Now that all the drama, wardrobe malfunctions, and late entrances are out of the way, you and what remains of your friends spend the rest of the night like you intended; dancing, laughing, and taking great pictures together. Later on into the night, everyone’s just about had their fill of fun and the party starts winding down. You split up, most of your friends piling into the Salt Lake slices delivery van so Red can drop them off. After some more hugs and laughs, you finally part ways, climbing into the passenger seat of his orange Volkswagen Beetle. 

His heart is thumping as you grab his hand and squeeze it a little once you’re on your way back to his house, causing a fresh wave of heat to rise to his face, and god he's nervous right now. His mind is still screaming at him that you're going to hate him, that he has to prove his feelings to you. He lets out a small little laugh at the gesture. 

“Well,” you start, tired from the night, but thriving off the energy between you, “that could have gone way worse…” 

“Yeah,” he laughs, nodding in agreement. You talk for the whole drive back to his place. You’d planned on staying over tonight since Ricky was driving and you figured it would be late, plus your mom’s car is at the mechanic so she’s using yours until some time tomorrow. You exchange sleepy chuckles as he parks. He checks his phone one more time as you leave the car, opening an article of women submitting stories about how they knew a guy loved them in a new tab. He sees a text from his dad - the date went well, he hopes Ricky and you had a good time at homecoming, and he’s going to bed so try to keep the noise down when you get back. 

“My dad’s asleep,” he says softly, unlocking the door. He guides you inside, hand resting low on your back, and closes the door quietly behind him. Walking quietly from his foyer to his room shouldn’t have been a problem, but standing in the darkness with Ricky, you both suddenly find it hard not to start giggling. Hushing each other, you quickly sneak up the stairs past Mr. Bowen’s room, down the hall to Ricky’s room. He barely closes the door and flicks the lock closed before dissolving into giggles. You kick off your heels, glad to finally take them off, and grab a makeup wipe from your bag. He digs through his clothes for a second before handing you a big t-shirt to sleep in. 

“Thanks,” you say, throwing away the makeup wipes. He gazes at you, watching you transition from formal and made up to casual and comfortable, your beauty unwavering. He doesn’t think he’s ever seen anyone as pretty as you before. You watch him take off his jacket and tie, and undo the first button or two of his shirt. The action sends butterflies to your stomach and heat to your core. You glance away. You stand up, seeing if you can reach the zipper of your dress. Before you can ask, you feel Ricky behind you. 

“Need some help with that?” He asks, closer to your ear than you’d expected and resting his hands on your waist. You both chuckle.

“Yeah,” you state, voice low and soft. He moves slowly, unzipping the back of your dress, careful not to snag the delicate fabric. You feel the bodice loosen around you, the end of the zipper stopping at the small of your back. He doesn’t move away. You can feel his breath fan over your shoulder, hand still resting on your waist. 

His face is so close to yours, and he mutters your name softly before pressing a kiss to your jawline, then another and another. He moves down, burying his face in your neck as he continues to press hot, open mouthed kisses against your skin. He breathes in your perfume, peachy and sweet and intoxicating. He nips at your neck causing you to gasp, his hands moving below the draping fabric and directly onto your warm skin. You sigh at the contact. He pulls you closer to him, holding you tight as he sucks on your neck. Your dress is slipping off your shoulders, barely on at all anymore, as he begins to feel you up, touching you and caressing you so tenderly. 

“Ricky,” you sigh. Your voice sounds so pretty when you’re like this. 

“God, I-” he breathes, barely catching the words before they’re out. He lets out a nervous laugh, causing you to giggle in his grasp. He shushes you through his own laughter, his hands never ceasing the way they rome over your body. 

"We have to be quiet," he says, turning you around in his arms, pressing himself up against you, trying so, so hard not to kiss you yet. 

"I can be quiet…" you state, a jokingly incredulous tone in your voice. You stare each other down, and he tries not to break first, tries not to smile or laugh, but god, it’s impossible not to smile when he looks at you. Before he can crack, before he loses all composure and bares his soul for you, places his heart eternally in your hands to do as you please with, he pivots. 

"Yeah?" He asks, and you feel the energy change, growing electric between you. "Is that a challenge?"

His tone is dangerous and he watches your eyes get wide. A second later he has you pinned against his mattress, pressing playful nips and kisses against your skin as muffled giggles and sighs escape your pretty mouth. His hands move down, grabbing your exposed skin as he kisses you harder and harder, riling the both of you up. You tear off the little remaining clothes either of you has on and he begins to roll his hips against you, grinding his hot, throbbing member against your heat. You let out a breathy moan, louder than before, as he continues to rock his hips against yours. 

“That wasn’t very quiet,” he murmurs into your ear between kisses to your cheek and jawline. Your chest vibrates against his, and a wave of relief washes through him. You don’t hate him. He loves that feeling he gets when he makes you laugh, he wants to make you do it again. 

“I can stay quiet,” you insist, already swept away by his touch, distracted by the warm kisses and bites he’s planting on your neck and chest. You’re even more distracted by the feeling of his fingers making their way down, brushing against your clit as they come into contact with the arousal dripping down your folds. He smiles, realizing if he can get you this turned on, this touchy, you must like him. He pushes his fingers in, finally met again with the cathartic feeling of your cushy, bumpy walls squeezing and folding around him. Arousal gushes, dripping down his fingers as he begins to stimulate the tight, sensitive muscles stretching around his fingers. He dwells on the feeling for a moment, maybe two, before you’re moaning again. It makes him laugh. 

“I sure hope you can,” he says, another dangerously playful look on his face, “cause if you get too loud…” He watches you for a split second, hanging on his words, anticipation written across your face, “I’m gonna stop.” 

Your stomach flip flops, exploding with butterflies at his words. Before you can look at his face, before you can gauge how serious he is about following through on his threat, his lips are on yours again. He kisses you, mouth open, tongue already prodding into your mouth. You’re lucky, you think, that he’s unintentionally muffling your noises with his mouth. You’re really lucky, because he quickly finds your g-spot, and there are a couple moans you couldn’t hold back if your life depended on it.

Every sigh, every gasp, every beautiful heart pounding moan Ricky elicits from you sends a fresh wave of relief and reassurance through him. You don’t hate him, and you’re not going to. You could never when he’s this good, this devoted to you. It’s impossible for him not to be when you’re so good to him. You’re so responsive to his touch, you’re totally on the same wavelength. 

You must know what he’s telling you through his actions, through the way he looks at you, the words he’s had to bite back from spilling out more than once. You wouldn’t be dripping down his fingers and moaning into his mouth and grabbing at him like this, you wouldn’t be in his bed if you didn’t feel the way he does about you - or even something close to it. He’ll happily take whatever you want to give him. Of course he wants it all, he wants to completely take over your heart, but just a little bit will keep him happy until he can.

“Right there,” you whine against his lips, “fuck, just like that… feels so good…” you mutter. 

‘See?’ he thinks, ‘You don’t say stuff like that if you don’t like someone a lot, much less moan it…’ 

It’s working. His plan to not lose you is working, he just has to make you cum so hard you can’t think straight, as many times as possible. And he’s going to, because there’s no way he can risk losing you. So he brings up his thumb, rubbing it over your clit as he curls his fingers against your gummy walls. It’s euphoric and overwhelming, and you barely have time to tug his hair before you’re cumming and pulsing around his fingers. 

You squeeze and clamp tight around him, and he can’t resist anymore. He needs his tongue inside you, he needs to taste you, feel you squeeze his tongue and cream into his mouth. So he pulls away, already missing the feeling of your mouths against each other, and gazes at you, breath fanning across your cheeks, eyes locked. He takes you in, thumb caressing your cheek while the other continues to fondle your clit. After a moment he’s able to break his gaze away, and he moves down, pushing your legs open. You heart thumps in your chest in anticipation as he begins to lick and suck on your heat, tongue flicking into your drippy hole. 

As soon as he gets a taste, he wants more. He stretches out his tongue, going to town on your cunt. Every sigh and tug of his hair, every attempt to muffle your moans makes him more eager to have you gush your sweet sticky cum all over him. This time he has some experience, and he’s making the most of it. He finds those spots inside you that make your eyes roll back, switching between them, bumping his nose against your clit, drawing stifled moan after stifled moan from you. One slips out, for real this time, and he pauses. It takes all his willpower; your scent is intoxicating and your taste is addictive, but the look on your face when you realize he’s standing by what he said is totally worth it. 

“I told you,” he murmurs against your core, the vibrations and tone of his voice sending electricity through you, “we have to be quiet…” Your hand is clamped over your mouth, and you nod. Your timing couldn’t be better, because you don’t have time to finish the gesture before he dives back in. After that, it doesn’t take much to send you over the edge. 

You give him everything he’s wanted all night, squeezing and gushing all over him while he laps up everything, holding down your hips while he shoves his tongue deeper inside you. It’s always surprising how far inside you he’s able to get it. You whine and moan, choking out praise as he already begins building up another high. He’s throbbing, desperate for anything you’ll give him, and he wants to make you say more shit like that. He wants to be good for you. 

“Oh god- fuck, Ricky!” you choke out in a whisper, one hand tangled in his hair, the other clamped over your mouth. You’re already close again, he can feel it. He knew this would work. He knew he could prove to you how much you mean to him. He doubles his efforts, squeezing your thighs and grinding his face against your pussy, still dripping from the last times he made you cum. His eyes are half lidded and locked on you, watching your face, the way you squirm below his touch, the way your tits bounce with every movement. You’re not sure how long it is until he has you absolutely gushing and convulsing around his tongue again, but every moment is filled with ecstasy. 

“Fuck you’re good at that…” you murmur, hand now playing with his hair instead of pulling it. “You’re one of the good ones, huh?” 

You probably could have knocked him out with a feather. Your words reverberate in his mind, and his cheeks flush. One of the good ones. Yeah. 

He’s throbbing harder than before, almost painfully turned on. He climbs back up over you, but before he can reach into his nightstand for a condom, you flip him over, straddling him. You look down at him with those beautiful eyes that hold every star in the night sky, biting your lip in that endearing way of yours. Your hands are warm on his shoulders, and he’s stunned at the suddenness of your action, and really eager to see where you’re going with this. He could watch you like this for hours, freezing this moment in time forever, eternally content with you, the way you touch him and look at him. You lean down closer to him, breath tickling his cheeks. 

“My turn.” 

You smile, the words coming out in a hushed giggle. Before he can blink, you’re grabbing his rock hard cock, squeezing it in your hands and teasing the tip as you spread around the precum already dripping down the side. He watches you, eyes wide and excited as you open your mouth, wrapping your lips around him. Your mouth is velvety soft, warm and wet, and he has to try not to cum on the spot. You pump the base of his cock, taking more of him in your mouth, and he tries not to buck his hips. He tries so hard not to move at all, tries to be good for you while you work your magic on him. He lets out a long, low moan. Suddenly you freeze, popping your lips off with a small wet noise as you look up at him. 

“Stay quiet or I stop…” you tease, throwing his own conditions back at him. He nods, panting at your words. “Good boy.” You murmur under your breath, but he definitely hears. Good boy. He can feel the oxytocin flooding his brain, and you barely get your lips around him and start bobbing your head before he feels it.

“I’m close,” he chokes out, and you look up at him. He watches a smirk appear at the corners of your eyes before you drag your tongue along the bottom of his cock. It’s more than enough, and he watches in utter awe as he shoots his load into your mouth, and you swallow all of it. The sight is enough to have him throbbing again. He bites back more moans, desperate for you to keep going, for you to call him a good boy again. You bob your head along his length, tongue dragging along the vein on the underside of his cock. 

One hand comes down to fondle his balls, and a choked moan slips out. He never knew he could feel this good. He never knew one person could make him like this. You continue to lick and suck, squeeze and pump and rub, and soon he’s fighting another orgasm, hoping to bask in the feeling of your mouth around him for just a little longer. His prayers are in vain, he realizes, as he shoots another load of sticky, salty cum into your mouth. You have no trouble taking this one either. You continue to suck and lick, riding out the last of his high, before finally releasing him with a soft pop. 

Thoroughly fucked out, he watches you climb up next to him, awestruck. You grab a blanket, pulling it over the both of you, and moving his face to press a few more kisses to his lips. Your tastes mingle as your tongues connect, and Ricky doesn’t think he’s ever tasted something that delicious. He wants more of it. It’s only when you eventually pull away that your eyes land on the clock behind him. 

“Christ, it’s late,” you murmur. You blink heavily, Ricky mirroring the action, and you trace your thumb over his cheek, just looking at him a little longer. You tug the blanket up a little higher, snuggling up next to him. He holds you close on instinct, still trying to process everything that happened tonight in spite of how exhausted he is. It hits him suddenly, and he struggles to stay awake so he can appreciate the kiss you press to his jaw, the warm feeling of your hand on his chest.

He tries so hard to stay awake, to look at you for a little while, because no amount of time with you feels like enough. He refuses to acknowledge the heavy way he blinks and squeezes his eyes, trying to force them to focus on you, but he can feel himself losing the fight against the deep sleep he’s about to slip into. This night was a success, he thinks. He did a good job.

Late morning sunlight streams through his window, finally dragging Ricky back into the waking world. He looks over, missing your presence, and finds his bed empty. As he rolls over, he’s struck by the sweet, intoxicating scent of your peachy perfume. It’s all over his pillow, his sheets, his blankets. His whole room smells faintly of your scent. He buries his nose in the pillow where you’d slept, breathing it in, taking him right back to last night. 

Eventually, he checks his phone. It’s later than he’d expected, but he’s greeted with a text from you, bringing an immediate, even bigger smile to his face. 

He sighs, lovestruck. He doesn’t want to get out of bed, doesn’t want the scent of your perfume to fade. He just wants to bask in it. 

[planetariumx]

Saw Ur Mom At The Grocery Store

Nancy Wheeler x fem!reader (this one's for my fellow girlies who love girlies)

Word Count: 1.7k (with lyrics in bold, also yes I know the one line mentions playlists on phones but just pretend it says cassette or something lol)

Summary/Warnings: Based on the song of the same title by Abby Cates (literally obsessed with it rn pls go listen!) Reader has been in love with her best friend Nancy for as long as she can remember, but things don't always work out in Hawkins do they? Oops it's all pining! very angsty but I gave it a happy ending as a treat. Jonathan and Nancy are platonic in this. NO SPOILERS FOR ST4, slight spoilers for the first 3 seasons, takes place some time between 2 & 3

Masterlist

I saw your mom at the grocery store

She said “I miss you, hope you’re doing well and I wish we saw you more”

You’re walking down the aisles in the small grocery store, scanning the shelves for the things on your list. The smell of freshly cleaned floors and the headache inducing fluorescent lights numbing your senses. A familiar voice cuts through your focus. Turning towards the source, you come face to face with Karen Wheeler. 

Cause you haven’t talked to me in at least six months

I thought that I was healed but now I’m open like a cut

Cause I saw your mom at the grocery store

And she asked me how I was

“How are you these days? It’s been so long since we’ve seen you! I’m sure Nancy would love to see you!” she continues on about what she has been up to. You’re not really listening but when she starts to say her goodbyes, you almost blurt it out.

“How’s Na- um how’s Holly?” genius save, totally not noticeable. Lucky for you, Mrs. Wheeler doesn’t seem to pick up on your little slip up, more than happy to talk about her youngest child. You’re just about to stop her with some lame excuse but she glances at her watch with a gasp. 

“Oh my, I’ve just been talking your ear off hon! I really should get home and start dinner, have a good one dear!” and with that she rushes off to pay for her groceries. 

I should’ve told her the truth 

That I don’t know who I am after you 

And I can’t stand to look at that fucking pair of shoes I used to wear with you

Or the pictures that I framed of you

Oh I feel like I’m split in two 

But I asked about your sister instead

Cause that’s what nice girls do

Of course, Mrs. Wheeler didn’t know your true relationship with her oldest daughter, it is the 80’s after all. And you never even dated, not really. You had been friends since you were kids, you did everything together. You were in middle school when you realized how you really felt about her but were too scared to say anything, so you buried it. 

Then in high school, everything with Steve and the Upside Down happened. No matter what, you were always there for each other. You grew closer and your feelings for her only increased. When she broke up with Steve, you decided to take your chance. 

Driving home the roads all look the same to me

I pass your house, I block out all the memories

You and Nancy were hanging out in her room, some pop song playing over her radio, the light floral scent of the detergent her mom used floating through the air. Sunlight streaming in through the window, warming you as you lay on her bed. She sat at the end of it on the floor flipping through a magazine. 

“Hey Nance?” you began shakily, she hummed in response. You stared up at the ceiling, took a deep breath and continued. 

“So you know we’ve been friends for years, and we always tell each other everything right? Well there’s sorta something I’ve never told you, or anyone for that matter…” She could tell you were nervous so she moved to sit on the bed next to you and waited for you to continue.

“I- well I like girls, like in a romantic way ya know?” you picked at your nails, trying to stop your hands from shaking. 

“And there’s this girl I like, she’s really smart and kind and so beautiful. We get along really well but I’ve always been scared to say anything because I don’t want to lose her as a friend. But I can’t keep pretending, it hurts too much to see her with someone else and now I have a chance and I’m not giving it up this time I-” you take a deep breath, forgetting to breathe during your little speech. 

“I think I love you, Nancy, I think I have since we were kids.” you can’t look at her, the silence too heavy as it drags on. You mentally beg her to say something, anything, just to put you out of your misery. And then something completely unexpected happens. Her hand gently tilts your chin up so you have nowhere to look but at her. Her eyes are soft and full of love and your heart starts to beat again. She leans down and your lips meet, it takes a minute to sink in and then you’re kissing her back. It’s all smiles and happy tears and you feel like you’re flying. 

“I think I love you too” she whispers when you break apart for air. 

But good things never seem to last long in this town. Shortly after that, everything went to shit again, and you had to push your feelings to the back burner for now. But ‘for now’ turned into months, you and Nancy grew apart, you didn’t talk about what happened between you. You had expected her to come to you, maybe you were still scared to make a move. But no matter how long you sat at the phone, or stared out the front window hoping to see her, she never showed. 

Tired of waiting, you decided to take matters into your own hands, so you drove to where she worked, practicing what you would say when you saw her. But when you got there, you saw her with Jonathan Byers, and she was laughing at something he said. Your heart sank, unshed tears stinging in your eyes as you watched them drive off in his car.

I should’ve let her know that I deleted all the playlists on my phone 

Cause every time that song plays I just wanna call you 

So I meditate now but the silence is almost just as loud

You drove home in a daze, locked yourself in your room, and sobbed into the pillows on your bed. Then the sadness turned to anger, at her, at Jonathan, but mostly at yourself for waiting so long. Why didn’t you just call her? Why were you still so scared of losing her that you hid from her? You just ended up losing her anyway. 

You took down all the pictures you had with her, put them in a shoebox in your closet with all the cassette tapes she had given you. On top of the box sat a pair of shoes that you used to wear because she said she liked them once. Sure it’s cliche but you were distraught. You avoided going places you knew she could be, hiding like a coward because you were too scared to see her again. Really only leaving the house when your mom needed you to pick something up from the store.

I should’ve told her the truth

I’ve been terrified for months of seeing you

Oh I’ll never be the same

And that’s how you ended up standing alone in the bread aisle watching Mrs. Wheeler get in her car and drive away, desperately trying to keep the tears from falling. 

You don’t really remember how you got home, just dropping the bag of food on the kitchen counter and trudging to your room, ignoring the questions from your mom. All the feelings came back to the surface as you slid to the floor, feeling your heart turn to glass and fall to the bottom of the deep aching pit in your stomach, shattering like it does every time. Too numb to put the pieces together just yet. Content to let the sadness pull you under. 

You don’t get much sleep that night, never even moved from your spot on the floor. But now the sun beams that signaled a new day are shining directly in your eyes. You slowly sit up, rubbing the sleep from your eyes and looking around. The muffled sound of the  phone ringing cuts through the silence, your mom shouts from downstairs, says it’s for you. 

So you pull yourself off the floor and make your way to the phone, grumbling a half-asleep ‘hello’ into the line. The voice that comes through the receiver jolts you fully awake. 

“Hey, it’s Nancy… Can we talk? In person?” the sound of her voice stirs the shards of your heart, making you feel light headed. You make a plan to meet at the park in an hour, and you rush back to your room to put on fresh clothes. 

She’s already there when you arrive, beaming at you when she sees you. The pit in your stomach suddenly doesn’t seem so dark. She pulls you into a big hug when you reach her, tears you didn’t know you still had start to roll down your cheeks. She hears you sniffle and pulls back, wiping the drop with her thumb. Nancy takes your hand and leads you to a secluded area with a bench, beckons you to sit with her, and begins to speak.

“Listen, I know things have been crazy recently, but I’m so sorry for not reaching out sooner. I guess I thought maybe you didn’t mean it or you didn’t want to talk about it. My mom said she saw you yesterday and I just knew I had to see you again. I would have called right away but I was so scared that you would hate me. Jonathan said I should just go for it, said that even if nothing came of it, at least I tried. So here I am, and I still feel the same way I did before, I just hope I’m not too late.” She’s looking at you as she finishes what she needed to say. Her eyes are glossy, and now it’s her turn to silently beg you to say something. 

So you decide to do what she did before, you cup her cheek and lean in. Your lips meet and she lets out a relieved sigh, her hand holding yours on her cheek. Those glass shards of your heart start to put themselves back together and you once again feel like flying. 

You spend the rest of the day with Nancy, catching up after so long apart. She takes you to the grocery store and buys your favorite snacks, and you spend the night laughing in her room where it all started. And when you get home the next day, you dig through your closet and pull out that shoebox with a smile on your face. Maybe good things do happen in this town.

[leejungchans]

— juliet on kingdom (episode 7).

juliet’s masterlist

from may 13’s episode

note: read the tweets from the bottom up 💕 keep in mind that this contains spoilers in case you want to watch the episode first :3 more under the cut bc this gets LONG ahjdhwjd 😔

— juliet’s outfit;

disclaimer: the blurring of faces in my outfit collages is in no way meant as a form of disrespect, the sole purpose is to put the focus on the hairstyle and there is absolutely no ill intent. thank you for understanding!!

so everyone really kinda freaked out last episode

bc they didn’t see juliet in the previews for the unit stages

she wasn’t with jongho, eunkwang and seungmin

nor was she with 3racha and joong

so that would leave the performance unit right??

atinys were desperately zooming into screenshots of the performance unit stage for any sign of our girl

and found nothing :(

even in the preview that came after the first one, she was nowhere to be seen 😔

eventually some people started theorising if it was bc mnet didn’t let her participate for whatever reason

and the truth is...drumroll please 🥁

SURPRISE

the boys sent her to be in the rap unit with joong 😋😋

mnet just didn’t show her scenes in the first two previews (like they did with minhyuk)

but she was in the previews where they went to jyp 🥺🥺

she was paired up with jisung for the 120-second interview :3

just two shy besties uwu

“why? why are you laughing?” jisung whines, “and right after you looked at my face too!”

juliet continues to laugh, hiding the lower half of her face behind her hands. “sorry, sorry, i’m not laughing at you, i promise!” she says between giggles, “i just didn’t expect us to be so nervous.”

“ah, i get shy around new people, more than what people would expect. so that’s kinda why i’m a bit awkward right now.”

“i’m like that too, but i thought we became closer friends during the sports day filming! i’m hurt!” she says, placing a hand over her heart.

“no, no, no!” jisung defends, waving his hands frantically, “we did! i’m still shy, i guess.”

“not shy, not me!” juliet sings in response, doing the hand movement in the choreography of itzy’s song.

stunned into silence by the sudden reference of his label-mates, jisung blinks at her owlishly before a loud ‘pft’ sound emits from both of them, and they dissolve into giggles once more.

“okay, okay,” she says, sobering up a little after a few seconds. “we need to do this seriously. no more being awkward! awkward is just a mindset.”

jisung’s eyes widen. “woah, you’re right. we won’t feel awkward if we just tell ourselves that we’re being cool.”

she nods approvingly. “exactly. we are cool.”

“okay then, let’s go!” he shouts enthusiastically, earning muffled snickers from the other members who are sitting off-screen.

juliet and jisung go quiet again from his outburst. she even tried to bite the inside of her cheek to stifle any laughter, but her efforts are futile as they both promptly collapse to the ground in a fit of giggles.

“i-i don’t think we can do this,” juliet wheezes to the cameras, clutching her stomach as tears gather in the corners of her eyes. beside her, jisung isn’t faring any better as he attempts to catch his breath.

off-screen, changbin playfully complains, “yah! what are you two doing? you’re supposed to be doing an interview!”

when she entered the jyp café with joong and minhyuk 3racha was like omg hiiiiiii

no one was happier than chan to see her 🥺

AUSSIE AUSSIE AUSSIE OI OI OI

3racha made her, joong and minhyuk sing their orders 💀💀

minhyuk: juliet your ears are so red lmao

juliet: [quickly untucks her hair so it covers her ears] do i really have to do this? 😭😭

chan: yes you do bestie 🤩

“[sighs] americanoooo~ joha joha~”

hongjoong: [cringes but also uwu bc she’s his baby]

3racha: kqjejwjdnsj awwww

minhyuk: ohhhhh~ cuteeee

smh juliet stop (unintentionally) collecting men 😔

okay but changbin treated them all with his jyp artist points 🥺🥺🥺 changbin best boy

juliet, to chan: i’ll come next time to use up your points 😼

minhyuk: me too!! juliet let’s go together!!!

yeah she malfunctioned for a second bc The™️ lee minhyuk just said that and he was her celebrity crush for the longest time pls

she is the most successful melody 😔

she was so excited when they all went to chan’s studio

“ohhhHhh so this is the famous chan’s room 😼 honoured to be here mate”

pls they named themselves 6racha and were literally just having a blast in the studio 😭😭😭

minhyuk: your voice sounds so different when you rap!!

juliet: really? 😅😅 i didn’t really notice

minhyuk: yeah it’s cool :]

okay but when they went to jypbob for lunch

she was so amazed by all the food

“😮😮😮 THIS ALL LOOKS SO GOOD WTF”

the Jeekies™️ making their debut on national tv

yes both jisung’s and juliet’s 🥰🥰

she was so shy when the others in mayfly came to watch rap unit’s rehearsal 😭😭😭

also everyone in the mayfly vocal and dance units went ❓❓❓ where is juliet????? shouldn’t she be here??????

felix: where’s my bestie :(

no lixliet for the unit stages 💔

wooyoung/jongho: oh she’s in the rap unit :D

“WDYM SHE’S IN THE RAP UNIT??????”

okay but as much of a power move this is, she was also so so so nervous

like, the most nervous she’s ever been on kingdom

bc she’s going to be performing with so many incredible rappers, juliet knows that she really has to give it her all to keep up with them

so she was Big Stressed™️ and not in a fun way

it was more of a “oh god what if i’m way too far behind and the difference in skill is so obvious that i cost our groups points????” way

but in true queen fashion, she definitely killed it during rehearsals and everyone in the unit reassured her that she had nothing to worry about 🥺🥺

move over round 2 juliet bc if you thought that was the last we’d see of rapper juliet, you have a big storm coming 😼😼

she rapped with hongjoong before he joined changbin, then rejoined the performance to rap with chan!!

aussie line stans are well fed ✨✨

girlie was collecting everyone in the audience 😼

pls but ateez was so proud of her bc they knew how stressed she was about this performance 😭😭😭

she was so relieved when mayfly won that she teared up before being pulled into the group hug :(((

“i’m so relieved by the results,” juliet says to the cameras during their backstage interview, the other members in the rap unit nodding in agreement. “we all had a lot of fun preparing for this performance, and i’m just really proud of us.”

“wait,” minhyuk says, tone laced with concern, “are you tearing up? why? we did well!”

hongjoong, sitting in the back row, reaches forward to pat juliet on the shoulder comfortingly as she goes silent to suppress the tears. “she was really stressed preparing for this performance, so she’s a bit overwhelmed right now,” he explains for her.

juliet inhales deeply before saying, “because our unit has so many great rappers, i felt burdened because i was scared that my rapping wouldn’t be up to par with everyone else’s. but everyone was so encouraging and kind, and it really helped me push through the pressure, so i’m very thankful.”

“ey, you did so well,” jisung says enthusiastically. “we never worried about your performance!”

now that their rap unit finished performing she could sit back and enjoy the other performances!!

she was mesmerised by it’s one’s dance unit bc their performance was so beautiful

she said :OOOOOO

then came mayfly’s dance unit!!!!

“MAYFLY LET’S GOOOOOOOO”

pls she was their biggest hypewoman 😭😭😭😭

literally screamed during san and felix’s part

then when wooyoung and felix did the stunt????

she lost her SHIT

the way mnet cut from chan’s worried “felix?” to juliet’s “FELIXXXXXX :D” 😭

“YEAHHHHHHHHH MAYFLYYYYY!!!!”

pls she was so so proud 😭😭😭😭😭😭

in conclusion mayfly are besties now ❤️❤️

— fan reactions;

a/n: hello is everyone okay because I AM NOT 💔💔 all the stages from today were so so good and i’m so proud of all the units 🤧🤧💗 i NEED the studio versions of all the songs from today <//3 (and from round 2 too 😭) also lemme know if you’d like to see the full version of jisung and juliet’s 120 sec interview!! 😋 (though i’m prolly gonna write it anyways whdjwhs) your feedback and support means a lot to me so tysm!! 🥺❤️

[shinjaeha]

ipytm ep 2 (thoughts + spoilers)

i’ve been trying my hardest to forget about iptym during the week so the countdown to each new ep won’t feel as long, but i don’t think i’ve succeeded. with each new ep i feel more and more nervous and excited bc i know the conflict and angst is only going to keep ramping up as the series goes on (and this ep was a good indication of that...not FULL BLOWN angst yet, but the undercurrent of angst is slowly starting to come to the surface). i’m def more prepared for it than i was during itsay, but that doesn’t make it easy ;;;

the standard ‘this is not a proper analysis’ here...i’m completely aware that this post in particular is really messy, but i just had a lot of mixed feelings and thoughts with this ep. one day i will learn how to condense my thoughts better, but today is not that day so i’m doing this under a read more for once bc it’s embarrassingly long 😂

we start off with teh in acting class where his teacher is explaining how you need to be able to understand yourself before you’re able to understand other people (and therefore put yourself in the shoes of the character you’re playing)...which even before i knew where this ep was going to go felt a lot like foreshadowing for the events that were going to unfold in this ep.

the acting exercises are basically a lot like the ones that we see bkpp (and the rest of the cast) having to do as part of their workshops in the documentary eps, so it’s kind of cool to see them incorporate parts of that into the actual show itself. feels more authentic since, if you’ve watched the documentary eps, you know that this is actually what the actors have to go through when they’re learning to let themselves go and get into character.

so through this montage of all of teh’s classes, we get to see how much he’s enjoying learning more and more about his major. it’s truly his passion, and he’s finally in his element. and it’s great that he’s surrounded by so many seniors that are also as driven and passionate about performing as he is...i find it interesting how teh, even from the start, has always been most attracted to people that have the same sense of ambitiousness as he does. in itsay, his best friend (aside from oh-aew obv) was tarn, who had a very similar mindset as him. so here, it’s not really that much of a surprise that all his uni friends are basically the drama club seniors that he sees as role models. oh-aew is kind of that one outlier bc he doesn’t fit that same mould/personality type that teh tends to surround himself with, which is where you can already start to see the discord between them arising. in itsay, bc oh-aew was working towards the same end goal as teh at the time, it wasn’t as much of a conflict. but in ipytm we can see that their paths are starting to diverge more and more. that being said, oh-aew’s someone that teh truly needs in his life bc he offers a different perspective to most of teh’s other friends, and as we can see later on, teh REALLY needs that.

now THIS was one of the interactions i was really interested in. we already knew from the ep 2 teaser that teh isn’t exactly happy with oh-aew’s new friend group, so i’ve been waiting to see how teh acts when he’s around them. everyone’s at q’s house celebrating plug’s birthday, and honestly?? they’re all really sweet and accommodating of teh (they get him sweet drinks bc teh tells them that he doesn’t drink bc it’s too bitter, and they don’t pressure him when he says he can’t drink bc he’s got morning classes). but then the conversation turns to teh and oh-aew becoming actors and earning lots of money (and how convenient that is), and teh starts to get a little riled up. i don’t think they mean anything by what they’re saying (they’re just playing around), but we know that teh's sensitive to this sort of thing, and i think to him, it’s almost like they’re saying it’s ‘easy’ to become an actor and start making bank. teh, who already knows how hard it is (esp since he’s been watching how difficult it’s been for khim in particular), starts getting defensive about it. the focus being on money hits a nerve with him too bc teh is very clearly majoring in comm arts bc it’s his dream, not bc of the money he could make from it. teh and oh-aew’s gang are just on different wavelengths, and you can really start to see how teh’s having trouble bonding with oh-aew’s gang bc of their differing mindsets.

it makes me slightly sad that you can see how worried oh-aew is about teh and his friends not meshing. it’s like we, the audience, are all feeling what oh-aew is feeling...his nervous glances at teh bc he’s afraid that teh might not like them. and the discomfort on teh’s part too. all of oh-aew friends tend to be a lot more like him, relaxed and happy to go with the flow, but we know that teh can be pretty rigid and intense about the things that he’s passionate about. oh-aew recognises this, which is why he’s as anxious as he is in the first place.

oh-aew’s tea tattoo in honour of teh is actually so sweet 😭 it shows how much teh means to him. he really got a permanent mark on his body to symbolise his love for his boyfriend ;;; but from teh’s perspective, it’s literally that first mark of change. it IS a pretty big decision, so i don’t blame teh for being shocked about it, but teh likely sees this as oh-aew’s friends being a ‘bad’ influence on him (which we know gets brought up again later). not bc of the tattoo itself, but bc of what it represents. it’s like he’s watching oh-aew start to change before his very eyes and he doesn’t know how to deal with that so he brushes it away for now.

the framing of that shot where teh and oh-aew are facing each other and then q comes to walk in between them is A LOT like how they used to frame the both of them in itsay and having bas walk in between them. interesting.

HOW MUCH DO I LOVE THE FACT THAT OH-AEW SPEAKS CHINESE WHEN HE’S DRUNK...that’s just plain adorable :’) it’s like he’s reverting back to when teh was teaching him chinese and they were first falling in love again. teh’s method of getting close to him was always tutoring oh-aew in chinese, so it’s as though oh-aew is trying to feel closer to teh again by speaking chinese to him. sort of like he’s trying to recreate that feeling all over again. i also love that this is basically the opposite of that oppo short film ad bkpp did haha.

we got the “ke yi ma” “ke yi” again ;;;;;;;; i love their little domestic moments. they’re so soft when they’re like this (i know we’re gonna have to weather the angst, but i hope we still have a lot more fluffy moments like this too pls). side note, i really love the lighting in these scenes!!

when oh-aew reads teh’s note about the kimchi jjigae and smiles but then reads the “do not skip class” and his smile fades away...oh, oh-aew, i feel u.

so now we get to see oh-aew in acting class, and the difference between oh-aew’s feelings towards class and teh’s feelings are like night and day. teh’s classes make him feel so fulfilled...this is genuinely something that he wants to do. but oh-aew is struggling. he doesn’t have that same sense of purpose as teh bc he’s starting to realise that this might not be what he really wants...he’s trying but just not enjoying it at all. when teh tells him about the casting call, i feel so much dread for him bc he’s clearly not looking forward to it whatsoever, but he knows how much this means to teh...so he’s willing to ignore his feelings for now if teh’s happy :(

is it just me or was this when oh-aew stopped carrying his ‘heart attack’ bag too??

idk this struggle in particular just feels so personal to me. i really identify with oh-aew when it comes to this bc when i was at uni i changed my major like 3-4 times (and changed unis a bunch of times on top of that) bc i had NO IDEA what i wanted to do. even now, i still have no clue what i’m doing a lot of the time. i’m glad that oh-aew at least managed to find some sort of clarity when he dropped in on his friends’ advertising class and realised that this was something that he enjoyed and was good at :’)

teh’s so excited and focussed on this audition that he can’t even see how worried and reluctant that oh-aew is about this. he wants them to have the same dream so bad that he can’t see that this might not be oh-aew’s dream anymore. but anyway, oh-aew is the sweetest, best boy as always. he’s so, so encouraging with teh. so patient. he really such a great balance to teh’s more volatile nature...but that contrast is also what makes you feel so bad for him when teh lashes out at him without thinking (as he’s prone to doing).

i LOVE khim. i just have so much respect for her. she’s always trying her hardest, and it’s painful to see her give so much of herself yet constantly be knocked down. the resilience that takes. i know that that’s part of the industry she’s in, but that doesn’t make it any easier to watch. there’s a lot to be said about how harsh the entertainment industry can be (and the inherent ageism/sexism/homophobia within it), which i don’t have the time to go into here, but having to hear criticism like that...purely based on your looks (you don’t look smart enough, young enough, manly enough, etc.) is so incredibly disheartening. teh commenting on how harsh it is, and khim saying that it’s super common and telling the both of them how they’re gonna have to go through all of that the more casting calls they go to...OF COURSE oh-aew is only going to feel even more dispirited about this when he’s already realising that this might not be his thing anymore.

being able to take rejection and criticism is really fucking difficult (i know i could never do it)...and seeing oh-aew being told that he’s not ‘manly’ enough/too ‘girly’ in acting class and again at the casting call is yet another knock at his confidence. the way you physically see oh-aew get more flustered and anxious as the audition goes on, when he sees the crew shaking their heads at him :((( i feel all the nervousness, anxiety and embarrassment that he’s feeling right down to my very bones. then to walk out from that audition to khim talking about how damn hard it is to keep doing this time and time again only to be continually rejected?? my poor boy :( what’s fascinating to me is how differently the both of them interpret khim’s speech. teh latches on to her words and sees them as motivation to keep going...to keep trying and persevering. like a challenge. but to oh-aew, he just sees the difficulty and rejection. the instability of this career path, and how hard this could potentially be on his family as well. they’re both hearing completely different things.

teh being so happy about his audition even though he didn’t get the part and the way he turns around to face oh-aew directly when oh-aew tells him they said he was “too girly” and how he couldn’t change his personality to be what they wanted :((( pls. i just want to hug him so bad. teh’s “i like you the way you are now” and reassurance that so many other people do too  😭i know he kind of makes a mess of himself later on, but i’m still so glad that oh-aew got to hear that from him at least.

this show is the best at making you feel all that nervousness and anxiety when any of the characters are about to drop some big news. i was waiting with bated breath when oh-aew told teh he wanted to transfer majors. it makes me sad though that oh-aew has to constantly feel like he’s walking on eggshells when it comes to teh...he’s always most worried about teh’s reaction, and that’s prob the main reason why he didn’t opt out of comm arts even earlier. but oh-aew has all these mounting doubts about his major, and there’s only so long he can stick it out for teh’s sake, and the casting call (and khim’s words) really solidified that for him.

teh’s "you haven’t given it your all”/”you haven’t done your best” rubs me the wrong way bc it’s easy to think that way when you’re set on something and know that that’s what you want to do...but when you’re doubting/not sure about something, it just isn’t the same thing. we all have different thresholds when it comes to what we can endure and how much we can put into something. teh’s a hard worker, we’ve seen how dedicated he can be when he really wants something, but not everyone works like this. not everyone can be a teh or a khim. and esp not when they’re having to give their all to something that doesn’t feel right for them. and oh-aew’s right...sometimes once is enough to know that something’s not a fit for you.

when oh-aew mentions that he sat in on advertising class and thinks he might be into it, it’s like a parallel of that scene when they’re kids and oh-aew told teh that he wanted to become an actor like him. only now it’s the opposite. teh’s had this plan in his head that he and oh-aew are going to reach their dream of becoming actors and the lead protagonists in a movie/series together for so long now that it’s hard for him to reconcile that oh-aew might no longer want this as much as he does anymore. it’s like he can see this ultimate goal of his crumbling. so just hearing that it’s bc of q and the rest of the gang’s ‘influence’ that oh-aew sat in on their advertising class in the first place (and this triggered his interest in advertising) is like strike two for teh vs. oh-aew’s friends.

i’ve def mentioned this before, but oh-aew has always been the more pragmatic of the two, whilst teh is more idealistic, so i understand why he would gravitate towards something that was more stable of a career for him. more of a guarantee. he knows that advertising/marketing suits him better (not to mention that he’s always had the resort as his safety to fall back on too), and it’s something that he’s discovering he actually enjoys more in general too.

when i first watched this, i was like “oh wow teh’s matured so much!!” bc he didn’t blow up at oh-aew during this scene...that kind of ended up backfiring on me towards the end, but at the same time, i do think there’s a certain level of growth there since he does end up trying to reassure oh-aew (even if the blow up still occurs later on). it’s a process though...and even baby steps are progress.

8 months later and teh’s walking past that same place he and oh-aew walked by during his first night in bangkok...only now the poster is no longer the same red one. it’s blue... as though it’s signifying that this is just teh’s dream alone now, and teh clearly still hasn’t come to terms with that yet.

i’m really happy seeing oh-aew in a much better place now!! it’s so good to see him happy and actually involved in uni with his friends. but watching teh struggle going through casting calls and rejections makes my heart ache. hearing khim’s experience with auditions, and actually having to experience it irl, are two entirely different things. it’s like the reality of the situation is starting to hit in for teh. and that, on top of oh-aew not being there to support him in the same way bc their goals in life aren’t similarly aligned anymore, is starting to take its toll.

god, when teh lined oh-aew and was waiting for his response i was like nooooo don’t do it DON��T DO IT only for him to open ig to check oh-aew’s story 😭(though it IS cute that they have couple pfps). but we’re regressing. and now that they have different social circles it’s even harder to connect than before. teh feels like oh-aew’s being pulled away from him, into another friend group that doesn’t include him...and his insecurities are bubbling to the surface again. teh’s always needed that reassurance that he’s ‘special’ to oh-aew. clearly, we know that he is...but even now that they’re dating, it’s still something that he questions. and esp now that oh-aew is starting to feel like he’s fading further and further away out of reach.

i love seeing all of teh’s friends encourage him. they all understand how tough it is, and to see them all pull together to lift his spirits again is so lovely. but then his mood completely changes again when oh-aew comes to join them for dinner :( teh’s doing that thing again where he says everything’s fine when everything’s not fine (cue that “they ask you how you are and you just have to say you’re fine when you’re not really fine” meme). the flash to teh’s face when top says that he didn’t pass the exam to get into anantasart, and you know he’s just thinking about how he gave up his spot for oh-aew initially, and now that oh-aew’s transferred, it’s kind of like he’s turned it down twice. oof.

when teh tells them all that oh-aew’s transferred to advertising, it’s as though this is his way of trying to separate both his worlds. like oh-aew doesn’t belong here with his drama club friends, and it’s that pettiness that we got from teh in itsay is back in full force all over again. it reminds me so much of that time oh-aew told the itsay gang that he was a virgin, and so teh told his friends at school that he was a virgin too. or when oh-aew sent him that picture of his and bas’ legs touching, so teh retaliated by putting that pic of tarn on his story and leaning in to kiss her. it’s like he always needs to one up oh-aew. he doesn’t want oh-aew to feel the same bond with his drama club friends that teh has (esp when he sees that oh-aew is so close to his uni friends). where oh-aew was anxious about teh and his uni friends not getting on, teh is anxious that oh-aew and his drama club friends will get on too well so he has to create this distinction between them. kind of like his petty attempt to be all “i have my own friends too!!”, but it’s also combined with that feeling of inadequacy that he might not fit into oh-aew’s life anymore. he might not be ‘special’. idk if that makes sense but basically i think that teh’s feeling a lot of conflicting things during this scene.

when he starts attacking oh-aew at dinner...that was really hard to watch. you ever feel like you want to reach through the screen and just put your hand over someone’s mouth so they stop talking?? it was rough :/ it’s one thing to fight when it’s just the two of you alone, but it’s another thing to tear your partner down right in front of your friends. i understand teh’s feelings (and i know that they’ve been building up over this time), but my frustration was through the ROOF during this. it’s on brand for him, but still. and then poor khim :( i know oh-aew didn’t mean it in that way but the awkwardness of this entire dinner was just overwhelming.

another thing that’s sad about what teh said about oh-aew is that this is a huge sore spot for oh-aew, and it’s always been one of his biggest insecurities. the reason they stopped being friends when they were kids was bc teh said that he was going to quit eventually, so for teh to talk about how “shilly shally and indecisive” he is/how easily he ‘quits’ at things is a low blow when he already knows how much those words hurt oh-aew.

teh has a habit of jumping to conclusions based on oh-aew’s social media posts instead of actually talking things out with oh-aew so naturally it would make an appearance again here as well. and calling oh-aew’s friends “shitty” bc they’re different to him (aren’t as driven as teh and his drama club gang...therefore a bad influence on oh-aew) makes it really evident that teh still has a lot to learn. he really needs to start taking those acting class lessons to heart so he can see that not everyone is the same, and that other peoples’ experiences and perspectives are valid too.

teh’s long pause and “maybe” to oh-aew’s “and if this is what i really am, you’re not gonna like me anymore, are you?” BIG SIGH. it’s so typical of teh. i know he’s honest to a fault, but he REALLY needs to learn to think before he speaks sometimes bc he always ends up regretting it. i love that impulsivity of his, but it’s also one of the most frustrating things about him.

one thing that i find kind of annoying with the time skip is that we miss so much of teh’s festering feelings that it’s a bit harder to empathise with him when he has his eventual blow up?? i think if we were seeing this more consistently, it would be much easier for us to understand things from his pov better. like if we could slowly see this building up more and more as time went on, rather than just time skipping the 8 months until the blow up.

anyway, now khim and top are graduating ;;; i really hope that we’ll still get to see more of them in the next eps. i also love how the people in teh’s life are always so concerned for him (and how oh-aew’s doing). the message behind the book teh gets for khim’s graduation present is really sweet.

when khim first tells them that she’s going to be a flight attendant and teh blows up, i felt really angry at him initially. but upon reflection and rewatching this ep again...i think i understand where he’s coming from a lot better now. obv i still think he was out of line bc of course what khim’s saying makes sense...she can’t keep going to casting calls and scraping by with minor roles when she has to support herself and her family. in the end, we all need money to survive, and sometimes we have to be realistic about it. i really loved what she said about how we can have multiple dreams at once. but yeah, my heart really went out for her so much here :( it might be difficult for teh to see (or accept) rn, but he’s a lot more privileged than he realises. he still has hoon and his mother to support him financially, but not everyone is in the same position. not everyone gets to be as lucky.

regardless, i still understand why teh gets as torn up about it as he does. khim is someone that he’s looked up to and respected SO much...and his own doubts and insecurities have been steadily increasing. first, oh-aew changes majors, then, he keeps getting rejected at auditions, and now, the senior that he respects the most bc of her hard work and determination, is giving up her dream (at least in his eyes) to become a flight attendant. it’s like the world keeps telling him to give up bc it’s not going to work out for him. and he’s invested EVERYTHING into this dream. it’s all or nothing for him. but it’s like everyone else is slipping away, and it’s getting harder and harder to hold onto.

when teh looks at the tie and is reminded of oh-aew always being there to put it on for him :(((((((( ngl i was hoping that teh would be the first one to approach oh-aew (since their fight was bc of him), but i’m glad he apologised at least. and that they had a good talk about their feelings. but then again, this reflection after their fights is what they’ve always been fairly good at. teh just has to learn to stop internalising things so much that he ends up exploding so they don’t get to this point in the first place. so much has flipped from the first ep where oh-aew was the one feeling lonely and out of place. now it’s teh’s turn to feel all alone as he sees everyone’s dreams and goals (but his) start to change. like everyone is moving on and learning to adjust while he’s being left behind.

when they’re promising each other that their love for one another will never change, it just makes me feel so SAD. seeing them in the moonlight like this compared to the first ep when they were on the beach in phuket and teh was so hopeful and oh-aew was so worried :( everything’s already changed so much. making this promise under the moon like this reminds me of how bkpp kept talking about how the ‘ipytm’ title itself means an impossible promise...the two of them hugging in the moonlight as the score plays just feels so painfully bittersweet somehow ;;; my heart is aching, and i want the next ep, but i can’t deny that my anxiety is slowly building.

anyway, i know the end of this sounds so negative but i’m still banking on our teh/oh-aew endgame!!!!!!! it just needs to get worse to get better, and there’s still so much space for them to grow and learn. so many more experiences in store for them.

[ariyucake]

Y/N L/N Ultimate Big sister [2]

In this one ur basically in drv3 so uh- yeah oh and, this is what [some] of the characters in drv3 think about u

[Some spoilers for drv3 ig..]

ヾ(≧▽≦*)o

= Shuichi Saihara [Aka Emo protag╰(*°▽°*)╯]

Ah yes, our protagonist, Shuichi Saihara. What does he think about you ?

When he first met you, you were a very kind person. Now, let's start !

You were like a little sister to him, You cared for him- so.. why not care for you ?? He doesn't know how to repay you for your kindness and being the only person to be able to cheer him up a little bit

If you ever get killed he's gonna cry non-stop, He lost Kaede and now he lost you ? Unbelievable !! But he WILL make sure to find ur killer.

If you survive in the end with him and the- uhm.. survivors- then he'll be very happy ! You, him and the survivors can now get out of the fictional world and into the real world you all go !

= Kokichi Ouma

Ok, we're talking about the antag of drv3 rn. Most antags are big mean jerks so let's start

You're basically kokichi's 2nd mom, I mean you did spoiled him alot with your food and love so uh yeah- But ur nice self is like TOO nice.. Everytime kokichi plans something evil, you would offer to help him like both of you are gonna go shopping to buy mf candy💀

He thinks ur talent should've been the Ultimate Mom, even though u wanted to be just like kamakura [aka the bich who's like good at everything] Wait no ur actually good at everything

Now.. if u ever get killed he's gonna be cursing and going insane, cuz'.. ur literally his pills, ur stupid sneezes, sh!tty tears and blah blah it's literally his pill so yeah if u die then he'll go insane

Ok, if u survived- with him.. *cough cough* [Girly how tf did u save him from that mf thing that squished him ??] Yayyyy u kokichi and the others get to live and go to the real world !! Yeah and blah blah happily ever after-

GIRLIES I'M TOO TIRED AHSHHAHSHAHSHS PLS FORGIVE ME AHH I AM VERY BUSY NOWADAYS AND COULD ALMOST NEVER- LIKE NEVER POST ALMOST ANYTHING SO YEAH THIS POST IS SHORT BUT- DONT WORRY IM GONNA MAKE A PART 2 WITH MORE CHARACTERS AHHAHSHA TAKE CARE GIRLIES AND BYE BYE (┬┬﹏┬┬)