#no one will get it

[calyxthenerd]

Can I have a canon divergence fic where Bal is from outside of the wall and is a descendant of a witch/elf sorceress, he encounters Ambro during his first time outside the wall

I was leading the mission to explore outside the wall, the past few months have been so confusing, one day, a huge chunk of the wall was simply gone, and the whole legion of knights was sent to wait for a threat to appear, we waited for a whole month, barely sleeping, having to have food brought out to us, but then the consensus became that there was no threat, it either had be slain long ago, or never existed, most people believe the former, after all, it’s hard to accept that what you’d believed your whole life, but I knew better, looking at the pink mouse nestled on my shoulder as I led our group into where we would set up camp next, I thought about how we’d met

////////

I was walking around town, buying supplies and food for the journey, when suddenly a random teenager stopped in my path, I sighed “look kid, i appreciate that you’re my fan, but I’m really busy right now, I’m very sorry”

“Geez, I knew you knight folk were stuck up, but the arrogance really is astounding” she shot back

“Okay, I’ll bite, if you don’t want an authograph, what is it?”

“I can help you”

He frowned “help with what?”

“Your mission, outside the wall, I can help”

He tried not to laugh “really? How can you help me?”

“I’ve been outside”

He suddenly got serious “You’ve been outside?”

“Yeah, I have, and I think I can help you not get lost or die out there, but first I need to show you something, and you have to promise not to freak out”

“Alright, I promise, what is it?” She proceeded to drag him into a dark alley and transform into a crow, he immediately made her his lieutenant, and, as they say, the rest was history

////////

Everyone was asleep, even Nimona, who was resting against my side as a bloodhound, but he was wide awake, keeping guard, when suddenly he heard a rustle in the trees nearby and shot to his feet, drawing his sword and waking his loyal friend in the process, when suddenly, random man, wearing a hooded cape emerge, making him get into a fighting stance and Nimona growl

He raised his hands in a peace offering “I did not come with any intentions of causing harm, I simply wish to investigate you, for your kingdom has been a mystery for the spellcasters guild way too long”

Ambrosius frowned “The spellcasters guild?”

“Yes, but I see one of our own has already been sent to your kingdom a few eons ago” the dark haired man looked at the girl

“First of all, who are you? Second of all, what do you mean?” He furrowed his eyebrows

“I am Ballister the Bold, and your friend there, is one of the Elders of our guild, Nimona the Valiant” he pointed at the shapeshifter, now turned back into a teenage girl “She’s a legend among us, she was cursed with immortality centuries ago, and then was assigned to a small, blooming village on the other side of the crescent river, the kingdom you currently reside in, and she stayed there, building it up with her influence and power, until it was ready to be torn down and rebuilt anew” the spellcaster explained

“Yeah, how do you think I shapeshift, dude?” she asked

“What. The. FUCK???” Ambrosius yelled

[tokkionline]

i have a whole thesis about how overwatch enforced insane beauty standards for women but i'll stay quiet

[modkatisbacc]

NINJA, THE MERGED REALMS ARE CRYIN OUT IN PAIN!

[bitchfitch]

writing advice for characters with a missing eye: dear God does losing an eyes function fuck up your neck. Ever since mine crapped out I've been slowly and unconsciously shifting towards holding my head at an angle to put the good eye closer to the center. and human necks. are not meant to accommodate that sorta thing.

[knightofleo]

[captainjonnitkessler]

>Join a union

>Hear people constantly complaining that the current union leadership is super corrupt, it's all just the same ten guys making all the decisions in secret and nobody else in the union ever gets to know what's going on

>Go to the monthly union meetings that are completely open to all 1200 union members

>The only attendees are the same ten guys every month, giving detailed reports about everything that's going on

[bonesandthebees]

one of the most infuriating things about becoming an adult is when you realize that it actually is 10x easier to solve problems by making a phone call vs literally any other communication method

[unsung-idiot]

don't show him modern technology; it won't end well

bonus under the cut:

[kochei0]

I turn to Ares.

Thanks to Tyler Miles Lockett who allowed me to draw inspiration from his ARES piece for page 2! Look at his etsy page it's SICK

⚔️ If you want to read some queer retelling of arturian legends have a look at my webtoon

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Expertise can't help you here.

[tariah23]

Oh…. Well, it’s over for Crunchyroll I guess

[wrenchwenches]

[sabertoothwalrus]

modern au laios

[smokiedokie]

I opened my copy of The Tale of the Body Thief & immediately had to close it again because of this silly little annotation

[the-autism-album]