#no one start worrying

[rider-on-a-white-horse]

Lucifer was going to kill him.

There's no question about it; he's definitely screwed.

What exactly was Death going to do that would anger his brother so much? That's easy.

He had to reap his niece. Death feared for his life.

His brother's mob of adopted children had far too many close calls with him for anyone's comfort, but this was not that. No, this was the natural end of a rather unnaturally long life. (Not that anyone had done this on purpose, of course. But Reality bent to the Morningstar family quite willingly.)

“Hello, Uncle. I wondered how long it would be until you came for me.”

“YOU COULD HAVE MUCH LONGER IF YOU WISHED.”

“I've already had long enough, Uncle. I'm ready.”

“IS YOUR FATHER? HAVE YOU TOLD HIM?”

“Pah, Lucifer tends to panic about this sort of thing. I didn't want to worry him.”

“AND SO YOU WOULD RATHER WORRY ME. HE WILL HAVE MY SKULL FOR THIS, YOU KNOW.”

“He won't do anything of the sort. Not if he doesn't want me to haunt him for ages.”

“I STRONGLY BELIEVE HE WOULD NOT MIND THAT.”

“I'd help Jay with their glitter.”

“HE WOULD MIND THAT.”

A laugh turns into a cough and a bony hand comes up to pat a withered back. 

“Uncle?”

“YES?”

“How much time is left?”

An hourglass is pulled out of long dark robes. The carvings on the wood are elaborate, filled with imagery of Heaven, Hell, and Earth. It is also, inexplicably, covered in glitter.

Only a few grains of sand remain in the top. As the last remaining grains fall, Death hesitates. She can see this, of course. She's seen the same expression on her siblings countless times when they don't want to do something they have to.

“Did you bring the sword or the scythe?”

“THE SCYTHE. IT FELT APPROPRIATE.”

“Damn. The sword is way cooler. Could I see it?”

Death pulls his scythe out and is met with the same oohs and aahs that one would expect from a child seeing a dinosaur for the first time.

“I KNOW WHAT YOU ARE DOING, CHILD.”

“Is it helping?”

“A LITTLE.”

The last grain of sand falls from the hourglass, and a blade sharper than anything is swung with perfect aim.

“I still think the sword would have been cooler.”

“HOW DO YOU FEEL?”

“I'm dead, Uncle.”

“YOUR FATHER IS GOING TO KILL ME.”

“No he won't. He knew full well that I was mortal. And it's not like it's your fault. You're just doing your job. You didn't kill me anymore than he did.”

“THIS IS WHY YOU HAVE ALWAYS BEEN MY FAVORITE.”

“Ha! I'm gonna tell Jay you said that.”

“PLEASE DO NOT. THAT ONE SCARES ME.”

“Jay scares everyone, calm down. And you’re their uncle too. Everyone knew this would happen at some point, I don’t know why you’re so worried.”

“CHILD, ARE YOU AWARE OF HOW MANY SUPERNATURAL BEINGS ARE GOING TO HUNT ME DOWN FOR THIS? THERE’S YOUR FATHER, THE LEGION -”

“You mean Eric.”

“YES, THE LEGION. JAY, EDREK, MINNIE -”

“I’m sorry, you think Minnie is going to hunt you down? Uncle, come on now, be serious.”

“I DO NOT LIKE TO UPSET THEM. IT MAKES ME FEEL BAD.”

“You and me both.”

“NOT TO MENTION THAT ARCHANGEL THAT IS SO FOND OF YOU.”

“Uncle, I know full well that you know Uriel’s name.”

“I HAVE NO DESIRE TO INVOKE THEIR NAME AND SUMMON THEM.”

“Fine. So, how does this work? I love you, but I don’t think that the afterlife is an endless gabfest with Death.”

“IT IS NOT. I AM SUPPOSED TO ESCORT YOU TO YOUR PLACE OF ETERNAL REST, EITHER HEAVEN OR HELL.”

“Okay, so which am I going to?”

“WELL -”

“That doesn’t sound good.”

“YOU HAVE SPENT YOUR LIFE IN A CONTRACT WITH LUCIFER.”

“He adopted me, I didn’t sell my soul to him. And I thought the rules were changed after all the shit with Enoch.”

“THAT DOES NOT MEAN THAT HEAVEN LOOKS UPON IT WITH MUCH MORE FAVOR.”

“Okay, well, I can deal with Hell. I haven’t kept up with all the updates Jesus has made in the past few decades, but I’m sure it can’t be too bad. It’s not like I’d be sent to one of the worse Hell Loops.”

“DO YOU WANT YOUR FATHER TO KILL ME? NO, I AM NOT GOING TO TAKE YOU TO HELL. I VALUE MY EXISTENCE FAR TOO MUCH FOR THAT.”

“Uncle, you’re not making any sense. I’m not welcome in Heaven, you’re not taking me to Hell, what else is there? Being a ghost? I don’t want that.”

“I COULD TAKE YOU TO HEAVEN. I DO NOT KNOW THAT THEY WOULD ACCEPT YOU. BUT WE CAN TRY.”

“Alright, we can try. Could I say goodbye to everyone first? If Heaven does accept me, I’d like to talk to Dad again first.”

“OF COURSE.”

A spectral hand holds a skeletal one, and the two of them vanish, off to say one last round of goodbyes. 

[rocketbirdie]

so close yet so far

[stuckinapril]

friend wanted to see my tumblr, and when i told him i can’t show it to him bc it’s basically my personal diary he went “oh so I can’t see it but a bunch of strangers on tumblr can??” he literally does not get me. no one will get me like the people in my phone get me

[reineydraws]

this is how i imagine week 3 at kuraigana starts for zoro & perona lol

[fabuloustrash05]

"When I was a young man, I fell in love with a woman-"

"Oh, hey, is it that late?"

"Sit."

This is such a funny father and son moment between these two, and I love it way too much.

Not only with Raph trying to get out of hearing a story from his dad that he's not interesting in/in the mood to hear, but also immediately wanting out the second he realizes it's about his dad's love life.

[garpen]

I love Gothamites thinking that the batfamily are Cryptids when they're not.

I also love the idea that to begin with, Gothamites know Robin has been a bunch of different human kids that the: Definitely a Cryptid Batman™ (bc let's be honest that thing is not human) has taken under his wing.

I think it makes the Robins scarier to them. Like "There's something fucked up enough about this kid that the Demon Bat took them in." And they're all pretty sure that every time there's a switch in Robin's it's bc the Cryptid Demon Batman thing probably killed them off or something.

They always try and warn off whatever new Robin he's taken in, but whenever they do the New Robin always laughs them off or attempts to assure them that they're fine and not worry.

[satelliteduster]

oh my god i forgot to post my absolute favorite strip from gay comix (issue #2, 1981)

[starboundsingularities]

the jurist system seems really cool i hope they keep using it :-)

27 notes

🌈 lawsbian Follow

hey girl. am i a suspect. because you can "court" me any time

🧊 just--ice Follow

try.

🌈 lawsbian Follow

hey girl. am i a suspect. because you can "try" me any time

🌈 lawsbian Follow

hey girl. are you a lawyer. because you can "try" to "court" me any time

🌈 lawsbian Follow

hey girl. am i on trial.

🌈 lawsbian Follow

i'm determined to make this work btw

🌈 lawsbian Follow

hey girl. law

🔪 violencekilling Follow

hey girl. are you a murderer. because ow ough ouch agh stop stabbing me

732,390 notes

🌟 rockliker270 Follow

guys watch out hes gonna shelly de kill you

293,485 notes

🎀 copiicat Follow

they called me to the witness stand and the defense attorney just shouted "BOOOOOO WE HATE YOUR PUSSY"

43,618 notes

🧇 edible-evidence Follow

look if i was on trial and the guy prosecuting me started advertising his music i'd just plead guilty. avoid the embarrassment of getting put in prison by a guy who basically used the trial to say "this blew up btw here's my soundcloud"

97,384 notes

⚖️ courtofpublicopinions Follow

💞 lawveyourself Follow

didnt miles edgeworth defend someone in a case once

⛲ fountainoftruth Follow

do you know the difference between a prosecutor and a defense attorney

270,934 notes

💟 longingforyou Follow

being rivals isn't enough i need to kiss you

💟 longingforyou Follow

who the fuck is evil magistrate

💟 longingforyou Follow

STOP TAGGING THIS WITH LAWYERS?????

584,769 notes

🐈 nyattorney Follow

they hired a guy to stand in court and shout "GET A ROOM YOU TWO" whenever the lawyers start getting a little too homoerotic

976 notes

💥 courtroomchaos Follow

your honor i know all the evidence points to my client being guilty. but come on you have to admit he kinda ate right

💼 courtofwaw Follow

mia fey when they had phoenix wright on trial

20,475 notes

🔍 thuthseeker Follow

ok hot take but i feel like these lawyers should maybe not be allowed to drag literal children to court with them?? how many people have gotten genuinely actually fucking SHOT in court and they're just ok bringing fucking 8 year olds in?

12,475 notes

💼 courtofwaw Follow

happy almost christmas to all who celebrate

💫 dizzydreamers124 Follow

it's march

🎄 holidazed Follow

happy almost christmas :)

😈 knownjaywalker Follow

WHO is putting this on my dash

👁️ cymorgue Follow

STOP POSTING THIS. IT IS JUNE.

🐼 pandastar91 Follow

ITS ALMOST CHRISTMAS!!!!!!!

1,589,589 notes

💽 platinumcourtrecord Follow

evil gavinners be like. innocent hate. this is a nothing post

19,384 notes

🥚 eggvidenced Follow

STOP asking me about the dl-6 post idc idc look even phoenix wright forged evidence once shut up

📕 lexculpatory Follow

he didn't forge the evidence, though. it was kristoph gavin who ordered the forgery. this was covered in the trial of vera misham. if you're going to try to compare yourself to well known figures, you could at least check the veracity of your claims.

🥚 eggvidenced Follow

yeah well. he might have. on a different case or something.

73 notes

🃏 thecourtjester Follow

i tried to take the bar exam but they didnt let me because i wasnt cunty and traumatized enough

57,384 notes

😇 innosense Follow

683,876 notes

🦀 mad_libz_87 Follow

when will global studios realize that i do not WANT another shitty steel samurai spinoff i just want the original show back

7,094 notes

⚖️ courtofpublicopinions Follow

she present on my evidence til i reach a verdict

⚖️ courtofpublicopinions Follow

WRONG BLOLG. DON'T REBLOG THIS. DELETE POST DELETE POST DELETE POST I SWEAR WE'RE PROFESSIONALS HERE

17,283 notes

👑 courtroyals Follow

"we need more great prosecutors" you guys couldn't even handle manfred von karma

🧊 just--ice Follow

didn't he kill someone?

👑 courtroyals Follow

irrelevant. you guys couldn't handle him.

587 notes

📋 lawandwhoreder Follow

law: i'm so law

lawyer, who needs to one up everyone no matter what: i'm more law than you

🏛️ lawyest Follow

hi

📋 lawandwhoreder Follow

you've got to be fucking kidding me

183,834 notes

🧊 just--ice Follow

why is it always murders with lawblr. why don't we ever talk about divorce or something

[ohkate]

Some people will only love you until they're done with you. Others will love you until they're done with themselves.

[ruporas]

good mornings throughout the travel

[ID: Two comics of Vash and Wolfwood from Trigun Maximum. The second is underneath the read more.

The first is in four panels and follows Vash and Wolfwood through hotel rooms. First, Vash and Wolfwood exit adjacent rooms, and Wolfwood has sparkles floating around him as he exclaims, “Rise and shine! Ready to go?” Vash frowns, displeased, and says, Urk— Good morning to you too.”

Next, they’re in a room with two beds. Wolfwood is awake and fully dressed. He’s sitting on the bed and smoking, back turned away from the viewer and he says, “Wake up already, sleepyhead.” Vash sits up with his eyes still closed and yawns before saying good morning. After that, they’re sharing a bed, and Wolfwood gets up and says, “Morning, sunshine. Time to get up.” His body shadows Vash from the sunlight. Vash is still lying down with a blanket draped over him as he mumbles good morning.

Finally, they’re embracing in bed, both shirtless. Sunlight shines on them, but their contact allows their shadows to drape over their faces. Vash smiles, kisses the top of Wolfwood’s head, and says, “Good morning, Wolfwood.” Wolfwood sleepily says, “Mph, g’morning, needle-noggin’,” snuggling into on Vash’s shoulder. End ID] ID CREDIT

TRIMAX Vol. 10 Spoilers under read more // bonus comic

[ID: The bonus comic starts with Vash asleep in bed, fully clothed with his hair half-black. Someone says “Good morning,” and Vash says, “Morning, Wolf—w...” He trails off as Livio, holding a plate of food, stares with abject shock.

Livio says, “I’m sorry.” Vash, smiling but sweating, says, “No, it’s my bad...” Livio repeats, “I’m sorry.” Vash says, “Geez, stop apologizing,” and cuts off Livio’s “I—” with a “Good morning, Livio.” Livio quietly mumbles, “... Good morning...”

Vash sits up from the couch he was sleeping on and looks down, thinking, “... That’s right. I won’t wake up to you anymore... I have to get used to that...” End ID]

[gunstellations]

boop! 💙🤍

[canisalbus]

Can I ask how Vasco reacted to hearing about Machete’s assassination? :o did he put on a brave face? Was he inconsolable? Does he imagine that if he were there, he could’ve done something (even if that isn’t true? I imagine it would be tortuous mentally and emotionally for him, poor lad

He most likely went through a mental breakdown, followed by years of paralyzing grief and depression. Vasco had proven to be outstandingly resilient and optimistic in adversity, putting on a brave face was his second nature. But this was his final 'break the unbreakable' moment. He turned withdrawn and apathetic. He had never lost anyone this abruptly before, and he became visibly paranoid about the safety and health of his family while failing to look after his own wellbeing.

Of course he kept rewinding the events in his head and second-guessing himself about whether he could've prevented this outcome somehow, even when everyone who knew about his situation kept telling him there was no reason for him to blame himself for it. He struggled with the suddenness of it, and the lack of closure, and couldn't get over thinking how the love of his life had died alone, surprised, scared and in pain, and that there was absolutely nothing he could do to remedy that. Ludovica's support was invaluable to him. Since he couldn't mourn openly she was one of the few people who were there for him.

Eventually he came to terms with what had happened and learned to live with it, and even though he slowly regained his good-humoured personality, he never fully recovered back to his previous self.

[jellybeandrawsthings]

Tall, sunshine and pastels werewolf and her smol goth girlfriend

[kizzer55555]

The power of hotdogs

Danny is running to Gotham to escape the GIW. As he’s running into an alleyway, he crashes into non other than condiment king who proceeds to attack and hits the GIW goons behind him. This absolutely terrifies them due to the fact that their prestigious white clothes will be stained. The fact that he has people running in terror gives Condiment king a giddy feeling so he proceeds to chase them around Gotham.

Thus starts Danny’s constant exploits of running to condiment king when he’s being chased and the rogue scarring the living daylights out of the GIW. They develop nightmares and Condiment king starts developing new concoctions that will specifically stain clothes and never come out. Mwa ha ha!

Eventually, Danny gets adopted by the rogue and becomes his sidekick. Now, when people learned that condiment king got a new sidekick, they laughed. Who in their right mind would want to mentor under him. They believed that this was some poor sob who was down on their luck and truly desperate. That or some weirdo like the ‘king’ himself.

But they didn’t understand.

They didn’t understand that they should never have let Danny Fenton (known as Phantom) become Condiment King’s sidekick.

Danny knows how to animate hotdogs and other foods to create an army. Danny knows intimately about the secret nasty burger sauce that is capable of powerful explosions of you heat it up. Danny has knowledge in the usage and how to build various weaponry designed to shoot or even be powered by green sludge (which can easily be replaced by ketchup, mustard, or relish).

And he hasn’t even shown Gotham his power-set yet. No one knows why he calls himself phantom. For all they know, he’s just a normal (terrifying) human.

Everyone blames the GIW for this mess.

[littlefankingdom]

Simple observation I made from reading these comics. DC, stop making their dad an asshole and make him hug them more.

Also, the hugs in these comics:

Tim's hug is not in Red Robin but it's during the run and when Bruce comes back in time.

Cass' hug is weird because they're suicidal freaks who think fighting is therapy. They fought while being drugged, and blew up a brigde. It makes sense for them only.

Jason's first hug (Outlaws) is after he tries to apologize for his crimes and Bruce refuses to let him to do it, because his boy is innocent for him 🥺 (and then, they fucked it up with Ethiopia because they cannot let them have nice things 🙄). The second one (Red Hood & Arsenal) is started by Jason, who is just very happy to see that Bruce is alive, even if he has lost his memory.

[krysmcscience]

The Lamb is malicious in a funny way and the Goat is funny in a malicious way. No, I will not elaborate.

Anyway, everyone give thanks to the Lamb for interrupting what was sure to be a very boring and patronizing PSA from their grouchy cat hubby. Truly, they are doing God's work. Granted, the Lamb canonically is God now, so, uh. Mostly they're just doing their own work.

Speaking of their grouchy cat hubby, yes this is absolutely still Narilamb, Narinder is 100% into his goofy-ass spouse always no matter what and we all know it, he just wasn't expecting his brand new adopted kid to share the same single goofy-ass brain cell as the Lamb. :)