#no one is safe. not cis women. not white women.

[trickstarbrave]

probably the most clear cut way to show how fucked up of an ideology TERFs have is the fact theyre just doomers and white supremacists. they dont have any actual, real solutions to any of the problems they face and complain about. because they don't believe there is an actual solution

they think "men are better, stronger, faster, smarter, and more athletic than women. there are only men and women in society and these are actually biological classifications. women are perpetual victims who are never truly safe around men. men will never understand women and women are doomed to take care of and be subservient to men forever"

there are some variations. some will say they dont believe in "men and women" as social genders and say gender is fake, but will then double down on the same gender stereotypes and say they are biologically innate and that is why women are so oppressed.

they also sometimes offer "solutions" but they aren't actual solutions. its the same shit they've always done which is "dont date and be alone with men" and "what if we went out and created a commune of just women?". but these solutions have always been flawed. their relationships are not genuine and their communities are also historically racist (shocker! /sarcasm). some are very extreme and say that women and men should never live together and the human race is doomed because all reproduction should stop and we should live in separate biological societies until humans die out, but even to the majority of TERFs these guys are nutjobs.

but really, most TERFs don't care about real solutions. they will date and marry men no problem. hell, they'll do shit like have their husbands come with them into the bathroom or stay posted outside with guns, which im sure makes other women feels safe (again. sarcasm). they aren't actually fucking radical at all. they buy into the same fucking patriarchal myths that have existed for centuries. they believe men will always be better than women and all women can do is grovel and be good little housewives and mothers to avoid being beaten, and also that men and women are weird, alien creatures to one another who will never understand each other's experiences and thus should hate each other.

they don't want things to get better. because tbh, this is just another brand of white woman victimhood so many scholars have been talking about for decades (link 1, link 2, theres more if you go looking LMAO). yes, there are TERFs who are women of color, but they are continuing to center the experiences of white women who love to be perpetual victims. they uphold standards of womanhood that are white in nature. and historically they have never been treated well by their white counterparts who, when there are no more trans people to harass, begin turning on them as gender deviants for not upholding the standards of white beauty and white femininity. white victimhood at the hands of men is a tool of white supremacy, hence why it is often women and men of color who have that card turned against them, regardless of if they are cis or not.

TERFs do not want real solutions, they want regression. white victimhood is power. they want to live in perpetual victimhood so they can use that card as they see fit, be it when they see a woman of color they don't like in the bathroom, they can accuse her of being a man and have her thrown out. when they describe trans women, they use descriptors often used to describe POC by racists. they will willingly ally themselves with the alt right because deep down remaining oppressed when it comes to abortion, voting, being able to work outside the home for equal pay, and marriage equality really pale in comparison to the appeal white supremacy has for them. they don't fully consciously recognize it, but it's the truth. which is why a lot of TERFs have fully gone mask off white supremacy tradwives after a while in the movement and have said TERF ideology and white supremacy are not very far from each other.

change isn't possible to them and they dont want it to be. they will handle the suffering and oppression if it means they can exercise control. in fact, they relish in the narrative of a perpetual victimhood, the myth of men being biologically superior to them, because they can use that to their advantage--as seen by having their fucking husbands armed to the teeth waiting outside public restrooms to "protect their wives". attacking the other, attacking the "degenerates" and "undesirables" in society will always come before actually changing their conditions in a material way. because they do believe deep down they will always be protected in the end. it's a privilege they have. and they will find out the hard way when there are no more trans people, no more bi, gay, pan, or other sexual minorities, and no more people of color, the white men will turn on them with the full front of their hatred and violence in ways they never could have imaged. because it always fucking happens.

[butch-bakugo]

Its not a shock to me that most "transandrophobia doesn't exist" people are trans women, mostly white trans women. They have a very specific image of what a trans man looks like and it's only two categories: the hyper fem, tits out, make up, twink trans man who doesn't pass nor try to and the hyper masculine, bearded, t'd up, all the surgeries, big buff trans man who you could never clock. They genuinely think every "transandrophobia truther" is lieing about not getting privileges they don't fucking have.

They genuinely believe every trans man passes and therefore we get male privilege and they get backed up by trans men who do pass and think a cis man making rape jokes with them and asking about their lift set is male privilege. Lemme shatter the illusion because as much as you like to scream about some wide spread privilege that doesn't exist, most trans people, in general, do not pass. This is especially true for trans men due to the hyperfocus society puts on feminine features. I have never met a fully passing trans man and I've met over a hundred personally irl. never. I know they exist but the fact y'all think we, en masse, get male privilege is factually just fucking wrong.

Trans men are not more acceptable or palatable to transphobes. Trans men are not more likely to pass. Trans men in mass do not get male privilege by virtue of our lack of passing and our medical history. Most trans men are still affected by the gender pay gap and thus can not afford surgeries.

You do not acknowledge the existence of non-passing trans men, only uphold the voices of trans men who pass and have the money for surgeries (a small percentage) then wonder why trans men laugh in your face when you make claims about male privilege we do not experience.

We are more likely to be conversionally raped than you. We are more like to be forcibly detransioned than you. We are more likely to experience domestic violence than you. We are more likely to experience hate crimes than you.

Trans men's hyper visibility in online spaces dose not transfer to real life visibility. You are more likely to see white cis gay men and white trans women in any media or ever mentioned than even white cis lesbians or white trans men. Your rhetoric is the origin of the "theyfab" myth. Our issues are invisible to you cause you do not care about other trans people besides yourself and other transfems. Everyone and their trans mother knows about transmysogny and the issues you personally face yet you expect trans men to be silent about their issues and feel like they should be silent because they are men. Trans men are more likely to experience litterally all forms of violence over trans women in every single avenue of violence that exists; religious, sexual, domestic, familial, etc. We are more likely to be stopped and abused before we socially transtion than anyone else due to hyper vigilance of society over afabs. You can scream all you'd like about how we only bring up our sex/the gender we are often raised as when it's convenient but you always ignore those often traumatizing experiences when it's convenient for you.

Many Transmascs and trans men had a traumatizing upbringing because society views us as "bad women" and " bad women" get treated so much worse and by many more angles than "bad men" specifically because we were forcibly assigned as women. You take advantage of a lack of nuance in the community by trying to group us with cis men specifically because you group yourself with cis women. News flash, neither of us and our experiences should be grouped with ANY cis group because we do not have cisgendered experiences.

I seriously think you think you are the most oppressed group in the trans community and you are not, not by a long shot. You are not the most oppressed group in the transgender community and that's a statistical fact. The most oppressed group, by far, are two spirits and cultural genders by virtue of them being inherently indigenous and indigenous people being the most oppressed race of people in the community regardless of the location they are indigenous to.

You are literally taking advantage of the things that were drilled into transmascs at a young age to be seen and not heard and to be quiet and let others talk, that they are lesser than everyone. Everyday there's a new story in the community of a cis man or a trans woman getting a trans man/masc pregnant to hurt them or force them off t or to detransion, this is not a fucking accident. You are not men, no one ever said you were, but you sure love to silence them like they do.

I'm not quiet, you do not intimately know our issues the same way we do not intimately know yours, You don't get to tell us what we do and don't experience and the fact you'd rather cry wolf and suspiciously call us "bitches" than hear us out, tells me everything i need to know. That alt right to trans woman pipeline you said you escaped? Yeah, you didn't. Ur just an alt right trans woman, Try Again.

[dragoninahumancostume]

My favorite part of being alive is that I've never felt welcome in any space except for that one year when I thought I was a non-binary bisexual asexual girl when I was 13 :)

[sinistersuns]

okay you’ve lost your anon privileges again. “i don’t interact” but you. you are? you’re having a tantrum in my ask box right now? i don’t even know who you are or what you’re so mad about??

[error-523scintilla]

Also like… not to deter from the point, but how many cis men are you sure are cis? Maybe they’ve not discovered they’re trans/nb/genderqueer/xenogender, or even will end up being part of the intersex community, and neither do you. Wow, it sure is so cool of you to ostracize the people of your community!!! So girlbossqueenslay of you!!

At the beginning of the year, my boyfriend —the token cishet guy of our queer friend group— came out to my as nonbinary, and is still coming out to terms with his gender (us being raised latinoamericanos and him amab in Venezuela). If it wasn’t for having a grand support group of queer friends and a bi girlfriend behind him, probably would’ve never come out. How many “men” are having the same experience? Why can’t they explore their gender and queerness? Why should they be rejected by default?

And another thing is… where’s the intersectionality? White feminism being the ban of our existence, black women will probably have more in common with black cis men than upper class white woman. Same goes with Latino women, or Asian women, or Arab women, having more in common with cis queer men of color than white women.

Oh, and if you’re a gold star lesbian, your sexuality doesn’t makes you less of a bigot :) you’re still next on their target list

"cis men dni" are you ready to come out of your "no boys allowed" treehouse yet. its time for lunch.

[autolenaphilia]

This post has been in the back of my mind ever since i saw it last year because it is a mask off moment for a usually more subtle transmisogynist. : I blacked out the account names being accused in the screenshot above, because i don't want to be spreading fake transmisogynistic callouts around even to be criticquing them.

Like "trans women are sexual predators who use their identity as queer women as cover to prey on children and other vulnerable people, and liberals are too afraid of being called transmisogynistic to stop them" is like the basic transmisogynist narrative. It's literally the terf narrative about trans women. This is the real terf rhetoric, not trans women criticizing (trans)misogyny.

Yet it is still so common among ostensibly transfem-accepting liberals/leftists. Like trans women using their identity as a shield against legitimate criticism of their predatory behavior is such a common trope in queer spaces that claim to be against terfs. This is because TME people use hating on terfs as a substitute for dealing with their own transmisogyny.

This is extremely common among people in the callout culture transmisogyny fandom like the screenshotted blogger.They go for this line about "transfems using their identity as a shield against genuine criticism" all the time when their obvious if lightly veiled transmisogyny is pointed out. This is their main argument, their own shield against criticism. And it rings very hollow when these people call out transfem after transfem as sexual predators based on them liking harmless kinks like fauxcest and CNC, literally using old radfem arguments against kink.

What this sort of thing is, is the denial that transmisogyny even exists. A claim that instead of being an especially oppressed class of women, we are actually a privileged group. And terfs here are open about saying it's because we are men and have male privilege. The more subtle kind of transmisogynist, the "trans women are women, terfs dni" crowd, leaves the trans women have male privilege bit unsaid but implied.

And of course it's false. As people are surely aware, being transfem makes you more likely to publicly accused of being a sexual menace. And they are most likely false accusations. Accusations against the privileged and powerful, like cis men, are seldom false. The social power that these men wield make it dangerous for any victim to come forward.

Accusations towards members of marginalized groups like transfems, however, are easy and safe to make, because they don't have that kind of social power or privilege. Their position in any social setting is tenuous, and it's easy to turn the group against them to exile them. Transfems don't have the power to defend themselves even against the flimsiest of accusations, while privileged men can defend themselves even against the most well-documented ones. Transfems are instead more likely to be victims of abuse, and then DARVOed by their abusers, being accused of abuse when they were actually abused.

The fact is that transfems can "scream transmisogyny" but few TME people, including other lgbt people, are not likely to listen.

And this is not a "white girl" problem despite what the screenshotted post implies. This problem is far worse for black transfems suffering from transmisogynynoir, and other non-white transfems. Read writings written by black transfems like Position of Guilt: Black Hot Allostatic Load by Anonsee Storyweaver.

[max1461]

Everybody does the exact same stupid shit. That white nationalist anon I was getting a while ago would send me story after story of some random black guy or immigrant committing a violent crime against a white person. Well, yeah, people are violent, you're gonna find those if you go looking for them. And there's a lot of racial animosity in the world, so you'll even find racially charged ones if you go looking! No shit, Sherlock. We could play this game all day. You find me a news story of a black guy killing a white guy, I find you a news story of white guy killing a black guy. This does no one any good.

TERFs are identical. News story after news story of a trans woman raping somebody. Yeah, the world is an awful place and people rape each other. I can find you a news story of a cis woman raping a teenage boy and getting three months in jail. I can find you a news story of a cis mom killing her disabled kid cause they're too much work. But I don't want to. The world sucks shit, why gorge yourself on the tragedy?

Zionists come up with news story after news story of pro-Palestinian/BDS/whatever protestors being antisemitic. Yep. A lot of people out there hate Jews. And there has been a genuine rise in antisemitism since the Oct. 7th attack, and that's awful. There are no excuses for that. Do you know what else has happened since then? The Israeli military has slaughtered tens of thousands of Palestinians, including huge numbers of innocent civilians—men, women and children.

People are often terrible to each other. Welcome to Earth. If you go looking for bad actors in a big enough group, you are guaranteed to find them. How about this. What about all the black people who didn't kill a white little girl? What about the black little girls? What about their hopes and dreams? What about their chance at life? What about all the trans women who didn't rape anybody in a bathroom? What if they just want to go about their lives, without constant public scrutiny of what genitals they have (as a cis woman, can you empathize with that? Constant public scrutiny of what you're doing with your genitals?). What about the 30,000 Palestinians who have been killed, and the 70,000 who have been displaced from their homes?

Fear has made you a monster. Fear has driven you to demand slaughter and oppression of innocent people because they look like guilty people you read about on the news, and since they look the same to you, you feel fearful—how can you tell whether these are the innocent ones or the guilty ones? Best to oppress and slaughter them preemptively just to be safe. I am here to tell you that this twisted logic of self-defense does not hold. I do not care if you feel safe—I do not care if you are safe—if the cost of your safety is innocent life. The world is a risky place. I am not going to deny that. Horrible things could happen to any of us. If we go around preemptively attacking other over it, we do not make it a bit better. And, needless to say, danger comes from everywhere, from every group of human beings, and oppressing the people who make you nervous will not, in fact, deliver you from danger. It just makes you a monster.

[drdemonprince]

have you defined the meaning of “white woman brain” anywhere and if not, can you? /gen

Many Black and brown feminist writers have discussed this phenomenon and I encourage you to seek out a lot of writing about this subject, because there are a variety of perspectives, but to distill it, white woman fragility brain is a phenomenon that is not exclusive to either white people or to women, but is especially common among those who can weaponize white womanhood, and it consists of the following qualities:

A view of oneself as a helpless victim that is constantly in threat of being attacked, especially by strangers (even though statistically, this is not the case).

A refusal to consider oneself as capable of doing harm to others, especially a lack of consideration toward others' body autonomy or consent. (even while being highly concerned about one's own autonomy and consent).

A generally passive or passive-aggressive orientation toward the world: seeing oneself as a romantic or sexual object to be approached, but never wanting to initiate (or feeling that one never can), never feeling comfortable directly communicating displeasure or one's desires, believing that others instead must guess at it. (and then resenting people when they don't, but never expressing it).

A tendency to cry, excessively berate oneself, complain about being made to feel "unsafe," or give up when criticized or challenged, especially when challenged by people of color.

A tendency to associate a person's body type with how much of a threat they are. For example, feeling unsafe around people with penises and expecting a social space to accommodate that fear to cater to you, a fear of people who come from cultures where it's common to speak loudly, a fear of those who are large, assertive, and/or darker-skinned.

Instinctive fawning-type responses to stress, and a pattern of feigning happiness, agreeability, and ease when one is not genuinely feeling it, and expecting all other people (but especially other women) to feign happiness as well, paired with a deep-seated resentment of anyone who violates this illusion and expresses any negativity (being especially punitive toward women of color).

Instinctively "smoothing over" conflict between other people before it even begins, even when healthy conflict is necessary and not at all your business-- often performed by gossiping behind other people's backs, triangulating information when it is not yours to share, asking people to alter their behavior in order to avoid a reaction from somebody else, presenting your concerns as if they were somebody else's ("what will people think!"), tone-policing the airing of grievances, derailing hard conversations with more light-hearted topics, and excluding people who are known to be candid and assertive.

Here are some articles on elements of the phenomenon and why it is so dangerous:

Now, I single white cis women out a lot when I am describing this phenomenon, because they have the most to gain from exhibiting these qualities, but make no mistake: this is a pattern that many types of people can and do use. I have seen white trans women use white women's tears to silence critique. I have witnessed women of color being passive-aggressively derailed and silenced by a Black manager who was in a position of institutional power over them. Multiple of the women who sexually harassed me in the story linked above were not white. And LORD knows I see plenty of t boys falling back on this shit, as well as cis men from wealthy backgrounds. It's a mindset that has deep colonial roots and we all must be on the look out for it in ourselves and others, and we must be vigilant in uprooting it.

[inkskinned]

there's a video on instagram of a man kicking his partner's door in. the top comment is (with over 4 thousand likes): "how about you tell us what you did to make him that angry?"

barring emergency, nobody should be kicking anybody's door in. many of us lived in houses where it was always, somehow, an emergency. there is a strange, almost hysterical calm that comes over you in that moment - everything feels muted, and you almost feel, however incongruently, like you should be laughing. you are living inside of "the emergency." oh my god, you think. i am now a fucking statistic.

there is another comment with 2.8 thousand likes: "if this was a woman doing it to a man, nobody would give a shit."

do people give a shit now, though?

barring emergency, the door should remain standing. the emergency should be panicked, desperate - "i'm coming in there to protect you." many of us know what it feels like when the emergency is instead "i'm coming in there to get you."

1.5k likes: "and yet you post this for notes. glad to see being the victim has become your whole personality."

hysteria is a word connected to womb, from greek. what you're experiencing is so senseless and inhumane that you (a rational creature) try to find any ground within what is irrational and cannot be explained. one of the most frustrating things about staying in bad situations is that we also lie to ourselves. we also ask ourselves - wow. what did i do?

women can be, and often are, also abusers. abuse is not gendered. abuse is not just a "straight person" problem. abuse does not have a face or figure or sexuality. you cannot pick an abuser out of a crowd. an abuser could be actually anybody.

and then so many people rally behind the man kicking the door in. here is something nobody should be doing, right? you want to ask every person that liked that first comment: do you ask this because you side with him? do you ask this because it helps you feel safe from this ever happening?

in some ways, you're weirdly sympathetic to the top comment, because it is the same logic you see frequently. the idea is that the average, normal, sane person doesn't just break down a door. doesn't just shoot up a school. doesn't stalk and kill women. doesn't threaten sexual assault. doesn't run over protesters. doesn't shoot an unarmed black person. doesn't scream at underpaid walmart employees. doesn't just "lose it". something had to have happened, right? because the default (white. straight. cis.) - that is someone who is always, you know. "sane."

(right?)

on a podcast, you hear a sane, normal, rational person. "if you piss me off, i'm going to need to hit something. sorry but i'm not apologizing. that's just who i am that's how it is." his voice almost sounds like he's laughing.

you think of the door, and how you were almost laughing behind it, too. ironically, every real emergency in your life has almost felt peaceful in comparison. fire, car accident, flash flooding - these felt quiet, covenant to you. you'd stood in all of them, feeling them pass over and up to your chin, never actually overwhelming.

but when the door was coming down, you had felt - is there a word for that? there has to be, a word, right.

surely one of us has figured out the word for that, i mean. it's such a large fucking statistic.

[whereserpentswalk]

Hi, I saw one of your latest posts talking about the gender "segregation" where you state that women's only spaces shouldn't exist. So, if that was actually real, do you think me, a cis lesbian woman, should I be using a changing room or a bathroom used also by people with penises?

I would feel very uncomfortable being naked near someone who is biologically a male and I have the right to say no, no matter how they react, cis women's feelings matter too and nobody can tell me when I should be uncomfortable, same thing goes for sports, cis women could get physically hurt if a biological male played against them and this had already happened in a school in the US.

This more confirms how you far left activists don't care about us

I do not care about people's disgust when it comes to means of segregation. Do you think that during the 1960s there was no white person who felt uncomfortable sharing a bathroom with someone with dark skin when desegregation hit bathrooms and locker rooms? Do you think there's no white person who feels that way now (hell, a big reason American suberbs are a thing is that it allows white people to live in white only places post civil rights laws)?

How is your desire to feel comfortable through segregation any diffrent? There is a group you feel uncomfortable with in a space so you want it segregated, I suggest you either not use that space or find a way to be more comfortable. Society may have a responsibility for you to be safe, but there is no responsibility for you to feel safe.

And do you think nobody wants to be segregated away from you? You're literally a queer person, there are people who do not want you in public because of the exact same uncomfortablity with you. You probably have way more in common with trans people than most cis people do. If many people were allowed to remove what makes them uncomfortable from society, you would be forced into the closet. This isn't a hypothetical, the same people pushing for removal of trans people from society have same sex relationships as their next target.

Uncomfortablity is not something society can or should protect you from.

[patricia-taxxon]

re: your last ask about feeling threatened by transmascs, as someone who technically i guess counts as transmasc, im sorry that others similar to me have made you feel unsafe. im not the same anon im just scared to post publically since im also a poc and plural and i know theyd love to rip me a new one if i spoke in opposition to them lol. im seeing them in the notes already jumping to conclusions and saying you were "thinking before speaking" and crying infighting, but how come that is the first response to seeing a transfem express very general discomfort or fear, after publically and repeatedly facing abuse and mistreatment from transmascs? the same people who try to socially murder you every time they disagree with something you say are mad that you dont like being kicked down anymore and feel apprehensive to interact with them. genuinely some white guilt level of sensitivity going on. i dont feel safe around white transmascs either at this point. other transmascs reading this post i genuinely need you guys to examine WHY she (and other transfems, especially on this platform) does not feel safe instead of immediately feeling butthurt. "infighting" is not "i have a rational fear after experiencing firsthand relentless online harassment specifically by transmisogynistic transmascs", patricia is not saying that she hates them anywhere or is causing a divide by expressing her fear. the same way that cis women are not "infighting" with men when they express fear after being abused. the people who ARE infighting are the transmisogynistic transmascs, that is who you need to call out. assuming otherwise is completely missing the point, but i have low hopes for people on this platform to examine their gut responses and biases.

ending this on a nice note, i hope this wasnt out of line and i didnt say anything wrong, i just woke up and got really mad that someone baited you with that ask and now the exact transmascs youre afraid of are about to do it all again. whoever asked that wanted this response to probably make some gotcha. love your music and im wishing yall the best with your plurality 🙏

Thank you for the kind words, but I don't think I was baited. I was emboldened by close friends to speak up instead of just deleting the ask, and I've been further emboldened by both the negative and positive responses. The instant not-all-men-ism and telling me to get offline because misogyny doesn't exist in real life and immediate typecasting as an angry man-hating feminist in proper 2014 reddit fashion, it's sobering, I guess. It's nice to see others having that same sober response, though. I never know how to respond to these long asks that are just people voicing agreement.

[spacelazarwolf]

Ngl I don’t trust a space that advertises itself as being for women and trans people or “anyone who isn’t a cis man” cause. I pass. Like I have a beard, a deep voice, and I’ve had top surgery. People look at me and assume I’m a cis man. I would probably be interrogated at the door and harassed by everyone there who decided it was no longer a safe space cause there’s an obvious man there. If your safe space requires me to flash my cunt at the door to prove I belong there I don’t want to be there. But oops, guess that means I can’t take part in feminist activism apparently. And you can say both spaces can exist all you want, but 1) what is the point of activism if you don’t want the privileged group to hear you? It sounds like what you’re looking for is a support group, also 2) if you live in too small a town, you’ll probably end up with one space in total and if they decide it’s exclusive to certain groups, and you either are an ally or in theory someone the group is trying to support but not in practice (eg, passing trans men), then I guess you’re left with no choice but to go fuck yourself? Doesn’t seem reasonable.

!!!!!!!

any group that is entirely based on the identity of who they’re letting in and not the actual function of the group is always going to go to shit.

“this group is for women and non cismen bc we deserve a space to talk abt the abuse we’ve faced from men!” ok where do cis men who are victims of abuse go? are they such a different species that you couldn’t possibly connect with them about shared trauma?

“this group is for women and non cismen bc our reproductive rights are under attack!” ok so you don’t want trans women or anyone who’s had a hysterectomy there? are you okay with a pro life woman being there and actively telling the other attendees that they’re child killers because they’ve had an abortion?

“this group is for women and non cismen bc we understand what it’s like to be afraid walking alone at night!” ok so where do black and brown cis men go who can’t even walk alone during the day without getting followed by cops or labeled as “suspicious” by white women?

you are always, ALWAYS going to be more successful if you label your group based on the PURPOSE of the group.

[nothorses]

You guys love suggesting trans women are aligned with males and trans men are aligned with females so badly that it's just gross at this point, transphobia with progressive wording is still transphobia ❤️

Yall really love your binaries, huh? Genuinely wild that you think the only way a trans person can be valid is by being widely socially recognized as a single binary gender accurate to the single binary gender they identify with.

I for one am a firm believer in the fact that transphobia exists, and as such, trans people are positioned outside of the cis man/cis woman socio-political binary & allowed access to neither unless and until it conditionally supports the system's ability to do them harm, like, for example, by:

aligning trans women with women when enacting misogyny against them, but not when valuing (mostly white) women as pure, valuable, and worthy of protection

aligning trans women with men when fearmongering about "dangerous male predators infiltrating women's bathrooms" (i.e. weaponizing autonomy granted by the patriarchy), but viewing them as "failed men" otherwise, and generally not valuing them as men in the context of determining who is deserving of male privilege

aligning trans men with men when discussing the "horrors" of transition- acne, body hair, balding, bottom growth, "becoming ugly"- but not when valuing men as worthy of male privilege, or when understanding them to be autonomous

aligning trans men with women when enacting misogyny against them (typically revoking autonomy), but not when valuing (mostly white) women as inherently "safe" or The Victim; or otherwise understanding them to be "traitors" to womanhood

Trans people occupy a different social/political position than cis people do. This is not new information.

You shouldn't be participating in gender-related discourse if you genuinely cannot grasp the idea that there might be a third experience.

[barzfrommarz]

since pride month is coming up remember

flag discourse is not real

slur discourse is not real

lesboy discourse is not real

mspec discourse is not real

trans men/transmascs are queer and we deserve a safe space

afab non binary people are not women lite

amab non binary people are still non binary

companies don’t give a shit about us. Do not praise them (esp since they are backing down bc of conservatives)

asexuals and aromantics are real people who are queer

The A in lgbtqia+ doesn’t not stand for ally. It stands for Asexual, Aromantic and Agender (and any other A label)

stop excluding masculine queer people

Xenogenders and Neoprnouns are valid

Xenogenders and Neopronouns hurt no one or make us look bad and don’t make transphobes hate us any more than they already do

Bisexuals can be in guy/girl relationships (and so on)

Queer platonic relationships are valid

Cishet/Allies are allowed at pride (seriously I saw a tweet from some idiot saying you can’t bring your cis partner to pride)

Real people cannot queerbait. Stop using this as a tool to (intentionally or not) force people to come out

A couple looking cishet or heteronormative does not mean they are

Trans men/Transmascs don’t owe you masculinity

trans women/transfems don’t owe you femininity

Anyone under the Nonbinary umbrella doesn’t owe you androgyny

Uplift Disabled/Neurodivergent/Non white queer/trans voices

Don’t forget about the Queer and Trans people being bombed in Palestine.

Cops aren’t allowed anywhere near pride. All Cops Are Bastards

Zionism,Racism,Antisemitism,Abelism etc is no welcome in the queer community

People who are still in the closet/not out are still part of our community and shouldn’t be forced to come out or be excluded

that’s all I can think of rn. Happy almost pride month 🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍🌈

if you can and it’s safe, consider attending IRL pride events. Stay safe!

[genderkoolaid]

have you seen the new feature from lyft, where female/nonbinary users can request female/nonbinary drivers? i was just wondering what your thoughts are?

personally a lot of the people i see upset about it are upset for the wrong reasons, its a lot of "creepy cis men will exploit this" which doesnt address the actual issues

in the replies to one of the posts there was an amab black nonbinary person saying they felt the least safe with white women drivers, who in their experience were most racist towards them, a lot of the replies to their comment were "this isnt about you, this is about protecting women/nonbinaries", "youre a cis man, you dont understand how difficult it is to be a woman" and things along those lines

personally i dont think this is going to make a difference, most actual minority groups will still be just as unsafe, all it seems to have done is create more hostility towards men/masculine presenting/otherwise oppressed people for not liking this new feature

Link for those curious

I mean I get the motivation here (making people feel safer), but for one making this only available to "women and nonbinary people" once again fucks over trans men. Like if a trans man wants to use this feature to feel safer, it seems like he'd have to misgender himself on the app. And if he seems like a cis man to the rider, is he going to be accused of being a predator taking advantage of the program? Would he be accused of that even if they know he's trans because he's a man?

And of course that last point also goes for anyone who might be read as being a cis man or too close to a cis man for the rider's comfort; trans women, nonbinary people assigned male, nonbinary people assigned female on T, intersex people with high T, etc etc. And that also applies to the rider- this could cause issues for trans* and intersex drivers who are viewed as cis men by driver.

Its almost like this kind of gender binary = safety mindset, while understandable, almost always finds a way to fuck over genderqueer people- specifically those seen as masculine, who are easily put into the "predator" category while also being more vulnerable. And as you mentioned it also ignores how race plays a role in this dynamic- Black and Brown riders and drivers alike are going to deal with these issues much more and much harsher than white people. & like I don't think we can separate this from the cultural impetus that white women must be preserved & protected, and that white women should be hyperparanoid of violation from (Black) men. Not that white women don't have legitimate fears of violence but there's a reason there isn't an option to choose the race of the rider you accept, and why their page about it focuses on images of white women drivers. The addition of "nonbinary" to this is just lip service.

[genderqueerdykes]

hi so im sorry if this is rude or anything im just kinda confused ab some things. so one of the posts on this blog mentions that if you hate trans men then your transphobic, which i agree with, but does it mean in the sense of if you say you hate all men (including trans men) that makes you transphobic? (typing that out makes me realize how stupid it is 😓) and also a post was speaking ab terfs and it said smthing along the lines of ‘trans men can be lesbian’ and maybe I dont get it but if trans men are men how can they be lesbians if the meaning of being a lesbian is wlw/nblnb (i think thats the right one)?

pls don’t feel like you need to answer or anything, and thanks if you do. have a good day!

hello!

it is still transphobic, yes. this is also antimasculism. saying that you hate all men affects, well... all men. and that includes other queer men, too. men are not a cishet monolith, and it's not good to hate random cishet men, either. the gender of "man" did not hurt you. specific men hurt you. hating and hiding from a gender pathologically will not keep you safe from harm. women can hurt you. non binary people can hurt you. profiling strangers especially gets dangerous because you are assuming things about them. you can't tell if a stranger in public is a cishet man or not just by looking at them. they could be a trans man, a non binary person, a genderfluid person, a closeted/boymoding trans woman, and so on.

manhood is not bad. it's not something dangerous or scary. behaving this way perpetuates the idea that men can never change or improve or try to do better. forcing them into a box of "Disgusting, vile, must be hated" will only make shitty behaviors worse, because this is reinforcing that they can't ever get better, so why bother? might as well keep doing the same shitty things

men can be lesbians, there's no rules. lesbian does not mean woman. anyone of any gender can be a lesbian. many trans men start out in the lesbian community and wish to stay there because we never lose that part of ourselves. many trans men just are lesbians regardless. i honestly highly recommend talking to the butch community and just transmascs in general because i feel like people who assume that it "doesn't make sense" literally just... have not talked to more than a small handful of transmascs

like, my honest suggestion is to just gain exposure to the butch and lesbian communities outside of white cis gender conforming femme lesbians if you're curious about this experience, because it's so common that if you're in a queer space you basically can't throw a rock without hitting a transmasc lesbian somewhere in the process. anyone of any gender can be a lesbian or gay. many trans women start off in the gay community and still identify as gay men ever after realizing they're also trans women. this phenomenon exists in other communities.

people are just needlessly fixated on trans men being lesbians because "oh no! men are so dangerous to the poor defenseless women!!!!!! they can't protect themselves we have to ban everyone and anyone who looks even slightly masc!!!! soft butches ONLY we don't want any masculine people around here they're too scary!!!!!!" that feeling in your brain that tells you that trans men can't be lesbians is a cop, and you're allowed to kill it.

hope that helps! take care!