#no one asked me

[kasagia]

Second Waltz

Pairing: Aleksander Morozova/General Kirigan/The Darkling x fem! inferni! reader Summary: For the Winter Fete, you were supposed to waltz with your friend the tidemaker and at the same time use your Grishas' power to entertain the king, queen and all the other self-righteous nobles. In your wildest dreams, you wouldn't have thought you'd end up dancing with General Kirigan... Nonsense from me: So I saw the post of @angellovelyasfck and got inspired... Warning(s): Darkling is a simp for reader; nobody knows why; he is so in love; matching kefta; author have no idea about dancing, but try to write about it; the reader is afraid of him but drawn to him, like a moth to the fire; Aleksander is a mastermind; Words count: 3,2k Taglist: @aoi-targaryen @morrigan-crowmwell ~•♤♤♤•~ Aleksander Morozova's Masterlist ~•♤♤♤•~

You looked like a real lady.

If Grishas could be ladies-in-waiting, be respected in Ravka, and have a position of nobility, then women would probably wear such dresses.

You didn't like parties organised by the royal family… well… except for the possibility of eating sweets prepared by royal chefs. It was the only thing that made up for the fact that you and the other Grishas were entertaining the king and his people.

Your powers were displayed as an attraction, a means of entertainment, and while some of you enjoyed the attention they were receiving at the time, others equally abhorred the idea of entertaining Otkazat'sya.

The winter fete was supposed to be like any other for you. You'll put on your festive kefta, sip a sneak peek of champagne, and munch on sweets with your friends.

But it wasn't supposed to be. Because someone figured out that the inferni and the tidemaker will waltz this year using their powers at the same time. Something about a poetic combination of opposites that unite in dance.

Because of this, you stood in the Grand Palace ballroom, looking anxiously around the room as you straightened your dress.

"Nervous?" a soft voice came from behind you. You turned around, sighing in relief, when you saw Genya.

"A little." you admit, calming down as she runs her hand through your hair and smooths the strands of your hair that have managed to come out of the updo she made for you. "I'm a soldier, not a dancer or lady."

Genya giggles. "In this dress, many would disagree with you. You look beautiful even without my touch-ups."

You are blushing. She made sure that you looked… just not like you tonight.

Genya has outdone herself. The dress was blue, sleeveless and strapless, and it went all the way down to the floor. In combination with a blue coat imitating an inferni kefta and a golden belt engraved with the symbol of the Second Army, you looked phenomenal.

Like a Grishas' princess...

"You're only saying this, because you are the one who made that dress."

"Well, it's very obvious." she teases you and taps you lightly on the shoulder. You both giggle, amused.

Suddenly, a ball of fire flashes between you. It misses your head by only a few inches. You wrinkle your nose and send the inferni who shot you a fireball an angry glare. Nobody does anything about it, the fire show continues as if nothing happened.

"What was that?" Genya asks, seeing your exchange of glances with the woman.

"Inferni affairs. Warkov is sent to go through the fold again. She resents that I haven't been there yet, and she's already gone four times. It's not my fault that the general has an aversion to me for some reason, and instead of using my powers in a good way, I have to do… this." you say in disgust, pointing at the dress. You clench your fists at your sides. "I can do more, Genya. I could help our people in fighting or in a battle… but instead, I'm stuck in this damn palace making playthings for the nobility." you add more quietly, making sure only she can hear you.

Genya sighs, looking at you. She strokes your cheek with her thumb, where you have a bit of icing from the cookie you ate earlier.

"I know what you mean. Trust me." you give her a sad look and squeeze her hand. She gives you a small smile. " But believe me… the general has his reasons for keeping you here." before you can say anything to respond or even ask what she means, you see her waving her hand, calling someone. David joins you, smiling at you two. You watch with interest as he steals glances at Genya. "Speaking of the general… there's been a slight change of plans."

"What? What do you mean?" you ask, confused, as you look from one to the other. You tense up at the mere mention of the general.

Suddenly the blue of your dress gives way to a deep, terrifying black. Only General Kirigan could wear this colour, as the only Shadow summoner, Darkling, descended from the Black Heretic. Panicked, you shift your gaze between Genya and David, hoping that this sudden change of colour won't bring you anyone's attention.

"Nya, Dav… it's black. Why did you turn it into black?" you become more and more uneasy when people around you notice the colour you wear.

It's official. General Kirigan will throw you to the volcras for such a disrespectful act.

"Your tidemaker friend was sent on... an important mission." David explains the sudden change of plans.

"What? But we were supposed to dance..." you say, surprised, but Genya cuts you off before you start panicking more about the absence of your friend, with whom you've been practicing this damn waltz and fire and water choreography for months.

"You will dance with the general."

After the red-haired girl utters this sentence, there is a long silence on your part, interrupted by the sounds of other inferni summoning fire. You freeze, completely shocked, refusing to believe that Genya meant what she said. It will be a pure disaster.

"No." you say, shaking your head.

Waltzing with a black general who, for some reason, doesn't recognise your presence in his army wasn't on your to-do list. Not today or ever. You feared this man more than anyone. And whatever you did to him to make him disapprove of your existence and the amount of power that lies dormant within you, you didn't want to be near him to test him even more and risk making him angry.

"Y/N." a woman snaps you out of your thoughts.

"Genya, please no. He hates me. I don't know why, but because of him, I can't do anything useful with my power. I'll step on his toes, and he'll hate me even more. He would kick me out of the Little Palace, and our evenings in the palace kitchen and secret chocolate snacking would be over."

"You eat chocolate without me?" asks a surprised and hurt David, oblivious to the growing panic and desperation inside of you. You can't dance with the general. This will end terribly.

"I'm going with you to stargaze outside the palace grounds. There's one one, David. Which doesn't change the fact that my death is imminent and none of you want to help me."

"For the love of the saints, Y/N, general won't kill you. It is just a dance. Put a smile on your face and try your best, I know you can do it and control yourself."

"What if I set him on fire? Saints, they will hang me for killing the only living Darkling."

"You were right; she is worse than me." David whispers, not quite subtly, to Genya while you're still panicking. You stop and look at him indignantly before answering in complete seriousness.

"I've heard that."

"Good. Now don't panic, the general is coming here." Genya takes David's arm and they run away from you, both discussing something lively.

However, before your brain processes the information and reacts defensively, by running away from where you are standing (preferably to the palace kitchen), you feel his presence behind you.

"Miss Y/L/N." you shiver when you hear his deep voice behind you.

"General." you reply in an unemotional military tone and turn to him after you swallow and calm down a bit.

"I see you already know about... a little change of plans." he says, nodding at your outfit. Only now are you painfully aware that you are facing the Black General, wearing his colors. May the saints receive your poor soul. "Genya and David did wonderful work." he adds. You have a bit of trouble swallowing and keeping your voice steady, but you finally manage to reassure yourself for a moment that you can at least pretend to be cool to the general.

"I... thank you, general... that's all their work." you say, trying to justify your appearance—wearing his colours when he's the only one who can wear them. However... he doesn't seem angry or crazy... and if you were dumber, you'd think he appreciates how good you look in black.

His dark eyes watch you carefully from top to bottom. You feel strange under his watchful gaze, unable to read any emotion from his face. He lingers a little longer on your body before meeting your eyes again.

"Shall we?" he asks, offering you his arm like a true gentleman. You dare not refuse him, so you nod your head and try to control the trembling of your hands as you slip your hand into the crook of his elbow. He leads you both further into the centre of the ballroom. You may notice that the infernis' show is about to end. "You will do everything as in rehearsals. I'll adjust my shadows to your fire to make it look as coherent as possible."

"Yes, general." you nod to him, having no idea how he wants to combine your fire and his shadows. But you have other problems on your mind now.

Like the hateful glare from Warkov. She's brave enough to 'accidentally' send another small fireball your way. Only your quick reflexes keep you from getting burned. The general looks at you, intrigued. But you pay no attention to him, too busy fighting to look at the inferni who hates you. The Darkling notices this and looks at the woman carefully. And if you looked at him, you'd see him nod to Ivan in Warkov's direction with a clear sign of investigating the matter between the two of you.

Inferni show ends. Your heart is beating like crazy with stress, knowing that now you will have to dance with the general. The darkling gives you a half-smile at your nervousness and grabs your hand as you both head to the center. He stands in front of you and, without letting go of your hand, says:

"We can find a light in the darkness… but not only from the sun or moon. But from something that we have around us that is as dangerous and unpredictable as it is beautiful and mesmerizing. Light isn't the only thing that dispels darkness. It is also the fire."

And with this, he joined hands, plunging the ballroom into complete darkness. The orchestra begins to play the melody you know, to which you have spent bloody hours learning the steps and memorising the moments when you are supposed to summon fire.

Only this time, it's not just going through the steps. No. This time, you feel something. Strange electricity as the general puts his hand on your waist and grabs your hand, pulling you closer than necessary. You begin to move around the room.

You light up the two of you with your fire, making you the only people visible in the dark room. And for some strange reason, you can't take your eyes off the general's dark irises, which stare at you as if they want to pierce your soul. His eyes glow from the flames of fire you let out, making it even harder to look away from him.

At one point, he takes away his shadows. The two of you are in full view, as is the crowd around you, but all you can look at is each other. His shadows travel with your fire, enhancing its brilliance.

You don't even notice when you start making your own modifications to the fire choreography, letting the balls and flames dance around the tiny shadows the general casts. You feel like all you can think about is a man holding you in his arms and watching you intently as if you were the only person in the whole world.

At one point, you are so overwhelmed by his gaze that you look away from him to the fire that is circling around you. You pull away from him slightly, so you don't rub against each other with every stop. You wonder why the general trusts you with enough power to dance with you so close to the fire but won't let you leave the walls of the Little Palace.

His hand on your waist pushes you gently back towards him, snapping you out of your thoughts. You turn your surprised look towards him.

"I don't bite, little flame… not unasked." he takes the opportunity to whisper in your ear. It takes your breath away for a moment. You wonder what the hell happened to him.

For the first time, you enjoy the hot fire around you… at least it's a way to explain to people why you blush lightly in his arms.

He spins you around, and as you land in his arms again, you notice that the colour of his kefta has changed with the heat of your fire. The black threads that decorate his kefta turn red. Your jaw would drop if you were alone.

You feel his hands on you more and more, despite how much material you have on you. The intensity of his gaze warms you more than the flames that dance with you around the two of you.

You don't know why his presence affects you so much. You don't know where the fear you felt before has gone. All you can do is let him guide you as he holds you securely in his arms and draws you close to him. Looking into his dark eyes makes all thoughts in your head disappear. It's just you and him.

And only the saints know how you manage to keep summoning fire without burning the two of you.

To your relief, the waltz comes to an end. However, instead of letting go of your waist and grabbing your hand to turn you around, Kirgan lets go of your hand. He lifts you with one arm around your waist and spins you around, keeping you close to him.

You melt in his arms. If you didn't know what it was about the attention he gave you before, you were completely lost now, feeling his strong muscles all around you. Your heart was beating like wildfire, and your cheeks were even hotter.

And a careful observer would have noticed how your fire got fed off by the general's sudden movement. And Kirigan was a very careful observer. So he gave you a quick, cheeky, smug smirk.

Your behaviour did not escape Genya and Fedyor. They looked at each other knowingly and whispered something conspiratorially to each other before Ivan hushed them.

Kirigan has put you safely on the ground. Flames and shadows disappeared around you. People started clapping. You were about to run from the middle of the room when a strong grip on your hand stopped you. The general leaned over and kissed your hand, not taking his eyes from you for even a moment.

You hold your breath and blush even more. His beard gently tickles your hand. The general's lips gently caress your skin, and you can't help but imagine how they would feel somewhere else...

The general reluctantly releases your hand and strokes it with his thumb. "I'm looking forward to the next dance, little flame." he whispers, so only you can hear him.

He releases your hand and walks away from you. You suddenly miss his closeness and the intoxicating scent of his perfume… but you're not distracted enough to sneak out of the ballroom at the first chance you get.

Your hand burns pleasantly where his mouth was a moment ago. And for the first time since you arrived at the Little Palace, you're looking forward to the next winter fete.

You went to the balcony to get some rest. The cool night air hits your skin. You lean against the railing and stare at the ground in front of you. You have a perfect view of the Little Palace from here.

You close your eyes and enjoy the night air. Suddenly, you feel a presence behind you. And loud footsteps make you realize that the general is specifically alerting you to his presence. You know if he wanted to, he'd sneak up on you silently.

You turn around and lean against the railing. "General." your soft whisper echoes across the balcony so clearly that the loud music doesn't prevent him from hearing you.

"Captain Y/L/N." he replies, taking a step towards you. He is standing next to you, looking at the terrain in front of you. "You are a good dancer." he praises you without looking at you.

"Thank you, General, but you were the one who mainly led our dance."

"Then let me appreciate that you never stepped on my toes. Believe me, it's a great feat; I've danced too many times not to know it." you can't help but giggle at his words. Out of the corner of your eye, you see him staring at you. He turns to you and tucks a strand of your hair behind your ear. "The way you manipulate fire... how you guide it, create shapes, and intensify the flame at will... few can do what you do. Rarely do I see such self-awareness and composure in an Inferni."

"However, I am not fit enough to use my powers anywhere other than within the walls of the Palace." you say before you can think it over. You're biting your tongue too late. Now all you can do is watch him, hoping he won't punish you for making such a bold accusation against him.

"You must forgive me, little flame… it's all my selfishness." he says tenderly, completely confusing you.

"What?"

"Let me show you." he says, and before you can ask anything else, he leans in and kisses you.

His hand on your cheek and lips, which caresses yours so tenderly, warms you better than any fire you could summon. You lean into his touch and feel yourself melting with every tactical, combined movement of his mouth and hand. You could control the flames… but he could do much more than just control the shadows. He played you perfectly.

At the moment, you were enjoying it more than you were worried.

Much to your displeasure, he moved away from you. He stroked your cheek with his thumb and whispered. "I can't wait to dance with you again." he licked his lips, looking at your own. His gaze came back to your eyes. "You look lovely in black, by the way." he adds, before wishing you good night and walking away like nothing happened.

Of course, before he left the balcony door, he gave you one last mischievous look. And standing there, warm from his kiss alone, with red cheeks and tingling lips, you knew he did it on purpose... that he made you want more.

The next day, you are forced to wear your blue kefta again. You would never think that wearing his colours would be so pleasant. Neither that the inferni who hated you and rebelled other people against you will be permanently moved to Kribirsk... or that you'll wake up in a room filled with your favourite flowers and an invitation to dinner with the general.

Maybe the waltzes weren't so bad after all.

[ask-the-roommate-au]

Do you guys have any favorite Pokémon?

I like Noivern.

I'm a Braixen person! Or Raichu.

My favorites are Mimikyu and Mr. Mime!

[lady-phasma]

https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZPRwdv6EP/

you've most definitely seen a variant of this before but i had to send it anyway because it made me think of you

Yes!! I love when people send me blorbo content! As for your second ask (that I had already reblogged it) - this is actually great because I decided to do something a little different that I might not have done on a reblog of someone else's post. I'm about to get real auntie.

I will thirst and objectify (respectfully) to my heart's content because I know myself and I give no more fucks at my age. However, not everyone is at the same point in their lives.

Masc folks: this is not the standard of masculine beauty!

This is unrealistic and even Austin will not look like this now that filming is far behind him. This is not sustainable. Mainstream media has gotten more on board with discussing unrealistic expectations of feminine beauty, but they still have even further to go before they discuss this enough!

Humans have thirsted over exceptional beauty since our history first began, but (because I am who I am) this is a reminder that you look exactly how you need to look. You can want to improve for yourself, that's fine. But whether or not you are thirsting alongside us and see thirst posts and silly gif reblogs, do not ever think that you aren't gorgeous because you don't look like this. Don't ever think you aren't perfect exactly how you are, in your version of masculinity. You are beautiful.

[recklesslycaffeinated]

Sans and Alastor

I’ve been thinking a lot about Sans and Alastor. Or Sans versus Alastor. But not who’d win in a fight (Sans) or who’d win Eurovision (Alastor). I’ve been thinking about them as characters, because that’s what I do.

At the heart of it, it boils down to this. Sans is a fundamentally good person living in a fucked-up world just doing his best. Alastor is a fundamentally evil person living in a fucked-up world also doing his best.

Dorks – Let’s get the most obvious one out of the way - they’re both dorks. Come on, both pun! Okay, Sans puns ad nauseam and Alastor claims he does in Hell’s Greatest Dad. Alastor has the dork part more than covered by his massively adorable poses when he’s just hanging out.

Big Smile, Scary eyes! – These loveable dorks are all fun and games. I mean, look at them, they’re always smiling! Until they turn on the scary eyes and you know not to fuck with them. This is the peek behind the curtain. The warning. Obviously, they could kill you right there and then, but why expend the effort when a dose of scary eyes will do the trick. Then it’s right back to a big old smile.

Dirty fighters – Paragons and Paladins need not apply. Both Sans and Alastor know the important thing about a fight is that they survive it. If that means avoiding a fight with bad odds, when it becomes unavoidable, using every trick in the book, that’s what they’re going to do. There’s no honour here. Sans is going to get in a massive attack before you’re even able to click a button and Alastor is going to hurl his minions at Adam – go get ‘em, boys!

Always a bigger fish – So far you’d think these guys have it all. Not so. These guys are living in an oppressive world and they’re not the top of the heap. If they were invincible, we wouldn’t be rooting for them as much. No need for cheerleaders if you can’t fail. I can’t tell you how many Let’s Play Genocide Runs I’ve seen where the Player is screaming for joy when they finally kill Sans… only to look suddenly horrified and miserable at his death. Alastor got his ass kicked by Adam, but I’m thinking more of the reveal that the big bad bully who scared Husk half to death is, himself, in a deal and isn’t happy about it. I’m sure that gave a lot of people immediate empathy with him.

Thinking outside the box – Sideways thinking has always been a trait of interesting characters and we’re invited into their minds to see a little of how they view the world. As a deal making demon, this is kind of Alastor’s whole shtick – he’s always finding the angles. For me, I think it’s the moment he gets Charlie on a deal which won’t involve her ‘harming’ anyone – which is a loophole so large you could drive a double-decker bus through it.

The best example for Sans is the fact that he and he alone of all the Monsters dodges. This is clearly not something Monsters understand or do. I have my own pet theory for why this is, but either way, Sans is not thinking the way he’s expected to.

Ultimate power – Sans and Alastor who could literally destroy you and everything you’ve ever known. They’re adorable silly boys with the power to bend reality.

However, this is where a key difference comes in. Because what’s important is their goals. In other words, what they’re using their ultimate power for. On the Genocide Run, Sans is trying to frustrate the Player long enough that they give up and Reset, bringing back his friends and family. Alastor is after hell domination. Maybe in series to come, we’ll find out it’s actually to ensure that bunnies and kittens can roam free… but I doubt it.

Does this make Sans better than Alastor? Well, ask a Player who’s been trying to win Sans’s fight for years who annoyed them more, Alastor in Hazbin of the Sans on their computer.

This isn’t me, FYI. I can’t do the Genocide run. If I had to hurt Papyrus, I don't know what I'd do. Turn off the computer and never use it again. I also almost cried when I accidentally killed Toriel on my first run. I immediately Reset and Flowey mocked me for it. Bastard.

[sillybilly-room21]

I’M ACTUALLY GONNA CRY

I ACCIDENTALLY PRESSED THE ASK BUTTON WHILE ASKING SOMETHING AND I WASN’T DONE WITH THE QUESTION AND I FORGOT TO PUT IT ON ANON AT LEAST

THIS IS POSSIBLY THE END OF THE WORLD (well, for me)

[idkmybffjaden]

Quick update on why I threatened to blog my GXS3 re-watch and then never followed through:

Y'all, I'm so torn over whether to recap the episodes I watch in the [very easy] parody manner or if I want to deep-dive into all my over-analysis about an unpopular spin-off show about children's card games.

Needless to say, I still haven't made up my mind so have some EFFing ducks because apparently ducks are our noble steeds in the acid trip fever dream that is GX.

[purple-obsidian]

bro… a 7-11 date? with a werewolf? drinking icees??? an ideal evening if u ask me

Happy werewolf Wednesday 🌕

[bethfuller]

limited perception.

find me on instagram!

[thelaurenshippen]

watching bridgerton and obviously there were a lot of things wrong with the way socializing has worked in the past, but honestly the idea of a "calling hour" is so appealing. office hours for friendship. you can show up unannounced at my home between 1 and 3pm. you must leave by 3pm. I may give you a pastry. lets bring that back

[ashipwreckcoast]

i could, in theory, buy a tofu press

[lady-phasma]

I agree but there's something about the boops being neutral. A reply takes time and not all of us may always know what to say. A reblog means we want it on our blog but maybe we just support the person and the content isn't our cuppa. We just want them to love what they love. A like isn't about the blogger, it's a casual "I agree" or "this is pretty."

The boops weren't broadcast. There's no judgment or fear of fandom bias/backlash. I'm not saying I agree with the current state of things. And I know there are people who feel differently than I do about these three modes of interaction and use them differently.

The boops were pure affection for loads of weirdos we may or may not have known before. They were not about content.

if there's one thing we can learn from this booping experience it's that we need to give people notes and interact with them for tumblr to be fun and thriving

[lady-phasma]

Idk if you'd write this but maybe a Feyd Rautha oneshot which is angsty and has either an open ending or a sad ending? Probably with unrequited love from the reader's side and is only requited from him once it's too late? Maybe that makes him worse than he already is when he realizes he loved her all along and wasted all this time by hurting her? Idk, I'm new to this lol

Hi Anon! Thanks for the request! (And don't prevaricate with your requests in the future: you might be new to it but what you want to read in this fandom is important!)

Unfortunately, it doesn't fit with my headcanon for Feyd but here's what I'm going to do: I'm going to put this out onto this hellsite and maybe someone will be inspired and write that!

Also, since you're anon, I'm going to use this as a platform to write a bit about my Feyd headcanon and you can completely ignore it if you want.

I read all kinds of Feyd fics and don't disagree with someone who wants to write about how he might love or fall in love. I have a problem with the way I personally interpret his character ever being remotely capable of feeling love. That's the kind of Feyd I want to write. It's neither the correct one nor the only one.

Because we're all using the same 20-ish minutes of film and some of us using parts of the first Dune book, we get to interpret Feyd pretty wildly. The more canon time we had with him the less ambiguous he would be. I love when we all get so rabid for someone we barely get to know.

There is something about characters whom I perceive to be immoral that fascinates me. I wouldn't want to be near him in real life, but would I listen to a podcast about his crimes or binge watch a documentary about his murders and charisma that convinced authorities he wasn't guilty? Sign me up!

He's pretty and Austin did an amazing job! But he's very much a psycho.

I want people to write what works for them and I hope someone writes something like you want to read. Hang in there anon, more fics are coming - it's only been about 18 days since the movie came out. 💜

[haroldhighballjordan]

sometimes I randomly think about the time a girl posted in this girls only Facebook group I’m in telling everyone how she broke up with her boyfriend and he lied saying that he lost the spare key she gave him, only to then break into her apartment when she wasn’t home and steal the cat they’d adopted while they were together, but then he denied having done this and she didn’t really have proof that he took the cat since he wouldn’t let her come into his place and look for it. And then another girl saw this post and knew her ex-boyfriend, and she was like “girl. I used to hook up with your mans back in xxxx and I still have his number. If you want, I’ll hit him up and get him to invite me back to his place and see if your cat’s there.” And the OP was like “bet.”

So this woman hit up homie dog, asked him out for drinks, went home with him, slept with him, and then woke up in the middle of the night and TOOK THE CAT. Like she had only said that she would confirm if the cat was there but then she took it upon herself to steal this woman’s cat back. Like she full on Trojan horsed this man and then hit up homegirl like “I got the goods. Where you wanna meet.” And then the two of them posted a photo of them together with the cat to the group.

And I just think women supporting women is so beautiful.

[hereforthevampires]

maybe i'm delusional

but im starting to think that the reason there seem to be a lot less bi and pan girls who date mostly girls than those who date mostly boys might be because once they do start dating girls, a lot of them second guess their attraction to men to the point where they just start identifying as lesbians instead of as bi/pan

...and like, yeah... if you date mostly girls it can be more useful to just say lesbian, and comphet can make it super confusing to parce your real feelings about men vs what you've internalized

and i know more than one girl who is pan but won't actually date men because the imbalance of patriarchy is so distasteful to them

some might take this as proof that bisexual is just a label you pass through on your way to what you 'really' are, and yeah while it is true that lots of people figure out they aren't bi, that doesn't mean no one is bi or pan

and maybe if ppl stop being so mean to the bisexuals more ppl will be more open when they identify with that label??

anyway this post is also about me I am a weird ace maybe aro lesbian who is maybe actually pan but who even knows at this point

[boomkawaiiboom]

I want to elaborate on this! So Neil has practiced this a lot. I've practiced it, in the sense that I speak in front of 60-70 people a couple of times a month.

Here's what I've been taught:

1) Learning to speak/present or whatever in front of audiences is not a process of learning not to be nervous. It's learning that being nervous is not a problem. Because, and that's point

2) those feelings you get when nervous - quicker heartbeat, heightened senses, tingling - they are your body helping you perform better than normal, giving you a shot of something extra. It's not a symptom of your body shutting down. And therefore

3) when practicing this, try remembering afterwards that no, your body did not ahut down on you. Stumbling over your words does not count as a shut down, that's just how speech works if you're not very, very well practiced. I still stumble over words, but I get back on track by taking a deep breath and starting that sentence over.

Being nervous does not mean your body is going to shut down.

And lastly, a practical tip:

4) ask someone in the audience to be your buddy while you're talking. They can be a friend, colleague or just a random person who seems nice. Their job is to be placed somewhere at the middle of the audience, and be looking and smiling at you at all times. That way you have someone to focus on when you're not looking at your notes, meaning you won't have to flit your focus around.

In my organization this has been institutionalized so that all of the people at the middle table of big assemblies know they have a special responsibility to look the speaker in the eye - because it helps!

And remember: practice does not make perfect - practice makes improvement. Don't go for perfection, cause then none of us are ever going to speak up.

Hi Mr. Gaiman,

Just got out of your reading of A Christmas Carol and we (my mom, aunt, and I) absolutely loved it! We also loved the little poem at the end. I have a few questions for you if you don’t mind.

1.) Is A Christmas Carol your favorite Christmas story and if it isn’t, what is? 2.) How did you learn to speak for long periods of time without stumbling? It was very impressive, especially to someone like me who tends to get very nervous when speaking in public.

3.) To that last point, do have any tips for dealing with anxiety before talking in front of people?

Thank you again for the fantastic performance and I hope you have a Merry Christmas!

1) I think my favourite Xmas story is O. Henry's Gifts of the Magi

2) I guess it's what I do.

3) I was terrified tonight before it started and just as terrified while i was doing it if I stopped to think. You do it anyway.

[thatratgo]

I love how they blindly trust the MC