#no lol i mean ik you guys liked last chapter

[charmac]

i am in your askbox holding you at gunpoint (lovingly) forcing you to update sugar we're going down swinging

Damn I kinda thought that series had fallen off., no one seems to want an update lowkey.,. 😞

[dellalalakang]

triple n: RIP kang della

masterlist | main masterlist

— lhs, pjs, sjy, psh —

well.......

contains: fivesome. really rough (choking, slapping, etc.), DELLA HAS AN IUD!!, della getting absolutely manhandled, her hands gets restrained for a bit, BUT THEN THERE IS A BIT OF DOM!DELLA ACTION, double penetration (as in anal), tiiiiiny bit of breeding kink, kitten as a nickname kink, daddy kink (sorry guys lol ik i said i wouldn't but i can't help it), i also said that they're never goofy during sex but we have the 02z in one session y'all— it's bound to get a little silly, LONGEST FIC I'VE WRITTEN (7.3k WORDS), longest + most detailed + most insane smut i've ever written omg i dont think i will EVER top this

happy belated anniversary my darlings 🤍 happy two years to della and her men (and alice) ✨

AND HAPPY ONE YEAR ANNIVERSARY TO ENHA'S (5/8) LOSS IN NNN! this chapter takes place on midnight 2022/11/11 (so i kinda thought that was today bcs dumbo self messed up the dates so i'm one day late but it's all good)

hi guys! i missed you! i will try to reply to asks soon! i'm so sorry for disappearing again, life has been rough and moving too fast 😭 DID NOT PROOFREAD BECAUSE I AM EMBARRASSED

Kang Della is going to die tonight.

While not literally, she was definitely going to be reborn as a new woman.

"Lala, stop praying. You're not actually gonna die," Sunoo said, more interested in his phone than his overreacting girlfriend. "You're gonna have so much fun, and we have the day off tomorrow. It'll be great."

"Sunoo shut up and help me pray," Della herself was already dressed, cleaned up and ready to head out.

But certainly not ready to meet the hyuppas.

"Why are we even praying when you're going to be doing something so sinful?"

There were three possible outcomes from tonight; One, the hyuppas being so annoyed that they prefer to ignore her for a bit. Though that is just her anxiety talking.

Two, they would take turns with her for four days straight. Which also means that she would have a limp and some back pain for a week or so.

Or three, they would all have their way with her, at the same time.

And the last option seems to be the most likely.

❅◦❆◦❅◦❆◦❅◦❆◦❅◦❆

"Oh, hi! Oppa! Really funny seeing you here but Sunghoon-oppa asked for beer, so here—" Jake immediately pulled Della into his room before she could escape from what was coming.

"You're in massive trouble, young lady," the girl would've laughed if the situation wasn't as serious. Who actually says that sentence in real life? Sim Jaeyun, apparently.

"Oh, wow! All the hyuppas are here!" Della laughed nervously. "Seems like you guys are preparing to have a celebration together! Wouldn't want boring 'ole Della making things all boring!" 

The stern look on all four men made Della withdraw into herself. She avoided eye contact by playing with her nails, mentally preparing herself for the scolding.

"Kang Della, sit down," Heeseung ordered, gesturing the couch with his eyebrows.

"Ah.. I really need to my room though, Yunji-unnie's waiting for me," Della hopes that she could somehow avoid the earful, though it is looking very improbable. "So I'm just here to hand over the beer and—" she gasped when Jay slowly took her hands and held them behind her back like a criminal.

"Do you know how hard it was to wait for you?" he said in a low tone. "The only reason why we did this stupid challenge was because of you."

Jay's deep voice caused Della's skin to erupt in goosebumps. She bit her lip as her heart started pumping faster. She tried to look into his eyes but quickly adverted her gaze when she saw how handsome he looked with his expression. She could feel herself getting wet again.

"The fucking audacity you had to lose to someone who wasn't even a part of this bullshit of a challenge," Sunghoon walked over and held her face with both hands. He noticed a familiar scent within the proximity. "You've been fucking drinking too. You did a lot with Sunoo, huh?" 

She had forgotten about the alcohol in her system, now understanding why her brain seems so hazy. She barely drank anything, but she is a major lightweight. The drink Sunoo gave her, mixed with the lack of sexual attention (and undeniably, Sunoo's seduction) must be why she lost the game so easily.

"I wasn't thinking straight. I didn't plan it or anything. Honest!" she replied with puppy eyes. While the look stirred something inside Sunghoon, it certainly wasn't sympathy. 

"Even if you didn't plan it, you still did it, didn't you?" he asked in an eerily calm voice. "You can't really take it back now, can you?" he brushed her bangs back but kept his hold firm. "Even if it was silly little foreplay."

Everything Sunghoon did just made her core uncomfortably wet. She was embarrassed to clutch her legs tighter but her mind was just occupied with how stunning he looked and how hot his words were.

"No," Della whined, shamelessly staring at his lips. "I'm sorry, oppas."

"Do you know what's gonna happen now?" Sunghoon asked, staring at her lips as well.

"Am I getting punished?" Della bit her lip at the thought.

"You're gonna deal with us four, yeah? We've been stupidly waiting for over a week," Sunghoon caressed her cheeks before forcefully making her look at the two boys on the bed. "Look at them. We all deserve to be relieved from this challenge, hm?" he whispered in her ear.

"Nghh," Della whined at the sight of Jake and Heeseung. They were sitting on the joint bed with a can of beer in their hands. They were intently staring at the three of them, anticipating their next moves and patiently waiting for their turn. They knew that hard-dom Sunghoon would be the best at disciplining Della in bed, while romantic Jay would really show her just how serious they are.

"Do you think you can do that?" Sunghoon whispered again, causing Della to gulp and nod her head. "Use your words."

"I'm gonna deal with all four of you," she said timidly. She has never handled more than two people before, and now she's jumping straight to four.

But she is excited. Extremely excited.

"Good girl," Jay kept his hold with one hand, using the other to stroke her hair. "Your safe word today is red and yellow, okay? Regardless of Korean or English."

"Okay, oppa," Della closed her eyes at the gentle kiss Jay left on her hair. Suddenly all the nerves left and she's just left with pure anticipation.

"Good girl," although the words were identical to Jay's, Sunghoon's praise sounded rougher, more possessive. "Now come here."

Sunghoon connected his lips to hers hungrily while his hands moved to grope her bare breasts under her pyjama top. 

Jay let out a small smirk, his hands busily tying her wrists with the neck tie he prepared. His recently free hands then moved to unbutton her top, helping Sunghoon get easier access.

"You're not wearing a fucking bra. Sunoo must've enjoyed these babies, huh?" Jay said against her neck as his hands replaced Sunghoon's. The latter's opted to move down and roam his hands on Della's hourglass figure.

"Did he? Answer Jay," Sunghoon mumbled on her lips before shifting his kisses to her neck.

"No, he didn't," Della whimpered at the stimulation. Her legs were now almost crossed at how eager she is for some sort of sexual activity.

"Aish, that kid," Jay cursed, pulling away from Della to grab himself a beer. "Won 3N but didn't even fully enjoy it," he then pat Heeseung's shoulder and sat down beside Jake. "Tag. You're it."

Heeseung smirked, taking a big swig of his drink before making his way to Dehoon. With some liquid courage, he knew that they would all have a long, wild night ahead of them. They all definitely need a few cans because they desperately need this.

"You could've tagged me, y'know?" Jake pointed at his roommate.

"Shut up," Jay sipped his drink. "Just go over and join them– who's stopping you?"

"Nah, I'm actually enjoying the view," the younger laid back and rested his upper body weight on his forearm. The two watched as Sunghoon pulled away as soon as he noticed Heeseung.

"I told you to sit down, didn't I?" Heeseung practically mumbled, using his free hand to push her down onto the couch. "Why didn't you listen to me but obeyed Sunghoon and Jongseong?"

Della's mouth watered at the angle. If her instincts were correct, she was gonna suck someone off, most probably Heeseung. 

And she absolutely loves giving head.

Heeseung especially tends to let out these adorable sounds that are music to her ears. She knows that he will try to hold them back since they're not alone, but she is determined to have this gorgeous man let loose of his (almost) equally gorgeous noises.

"I'm sorry, oppa," the lower angle made Della's puppy eyes look even more cute. "I was just nervous."

"You know what those eyes do to me," Heeseung ran a thumb over her lip. "Should we forgive her, Sunghoon?" he sucked in a breath when she took his thumb into her mouth to suck gently.

"We'll see about that," a loud zipper sound filled the room as Sunghoon aggressively undid his pants. "Open up," and his cock was in front of Della's face in no time.

She did not need to be told twice. Her eyes instantly closed as her tongue swirled around the tip. She played around with it for a few seconds before pushing it all the way to the back of her throat.

"Fuckkk, I missed this," Sunghoon threw his head back. "So fucking good," he bit his lip harshly.

Upon the sight, Heeseung hurriedly lowered his sweatpants with one hand, but struggled to get his hard-on out from the tightness of his boxers. He eventually succeeded once Sunghoon helped by taking the beer out of his hands.

"Pay attention to hyung too," Sunghoon said and took a large gulp of the liquid. 

Della wasted no time in having Heeseung inside her mouth with her tongue swirling around the girth. She didn't care as her hair got everywhere.

"Thereee you go," Heeseung grunted, pushing the hair behind her shoulders and brushed her bangs back . "Ah fuck!" he bit his lip to try and contain his sounds.

"Ya– I meant divide your attention, not completely move on to him," Della gasped as Sunghoon pulled her hair so she could come back to him. "Back and forth, baby, you can do it."

It is definitely difficult. Della has never given head with her hands tied before, let alone with two dicks.

But if the boys know anything about their baby, they'll know that she is not a quitter; she will persist until she's absolutely certain she can't.

She bobbed her head two times on Sunghoon before switching back to Heeseung to repeat her movements, and doing the same to Sunghoon again. The perspective was so hot that Sunghoon's breath turned heavy and Heeseung's moans were audible again.

Jay and Jake, on the other hand, were getting a bit impatient because they could barely see anything. Sunghoon could almost sense it, and as he turned his head to look at his two best friends, he found Jake fiddling with his can while Jay tapped his hand in wait.

"Hyung, let's move to the bed," Sunghoon breathed out, pulling Della away from him and up from the sofa. Della whined at the loss but let herself be moved around like a doll. "Be fucking patient. You were willing to wait for a month, you can definitely handle a few seconds," Sunghoon slapped her lightly.

DellaTheMasochist only gave him an annoyed look with a bratty pout, making him slap her once more. 

"Oh you're gonna be a little brat, huh? I'll deal with you fucking later," he then carefully pushed her to Jay's arms, causing Della to smile in adoration. No matter how rough sex is with Sunghoon, he's still a huge softy.

"Well hello there," Jay caught her with one hand. "Were you being a bit bratty?" he asked while fixing her hair gently.

"No, never," Della shook her head innocently. Sunghoon grinned as he opened himself a can, sitting on the bed beside Heeseung. 

Her absolute brattiness only comes out to Sunghoon. She's an angel with Jay, putty with Jake, and a dominant with Heeseung.

"Of course not, you're our princess," Jay breathed down her neck and captured a nipple in his mouth. He blindly handed Jake his drink so he could use both hands to hug her waist. He spent a few minutes slowly enjoying her boobs, leaving hickeys all around the area. 

The three knew that Jay liked his intimacy, so they didn't interrupt.

He eventually laid her between himself and Jake, opting to just stroke her hair for now. Della was settling into a more comfortable position when Jay noticed that Jake's hands were now free from the cans he was holding. 

He gestured for the Aussie to begin, eliciting a grin from Jake before hovering above Della.

"Hi, baby," Jake whispered. His attractive face and accent left a small blush to her cheeks. "I missed you," he connected their lips together in a steamy kiss. 

The thing with Dake is that they don't always have a clear dominant in the bedroom. Most times it's Jake while others it's Della. What's crystal is that they are really passionate together. Practically straight out of an erotic movie.

"I'm still annoyed about Triple N but I miss you too much to fucking care right now," he ran his hands down from her sides, eventually tugging her shorts and panties down as far as he could. "Just wanna devour you."

He then proceeded to make his way down until he was off the bed with his face in between her legs. He completely got rid of her lower garments and took a deep breath, biting his lip before diving into her heat. One of his favourite things to do with her, and something that she desperately needed.

"Ah fuck!" Della threw her head back, pressing her thighs against his head. "Ahhh Jakey!" she whined. 

"Sensitive babyy," Jay cooed and held her face with his hand. "You almost gave this up for a month, you know?" he left small kisses all over her face.

"November's my birthday month, she ain't gonna give this up for the whole thirty," Jake pulled back slightly to comment. With his accent and slight mumbling, Jay could barely understand what he was saying. Della, however, understood perfectly.

"I told you that I would give you an exception, right?" Della's answer just connected the dots for Jay. Big mistake.

"You promised him an exception?" Jay halted his caresses to seriously ask. But Jake had resumed his mission, and Della is far too distracted to answer. "Fucking answer me– you gave him an exception?" he tightened his grip on her face.

"Y-yeah, for his birthday," Jay let out a scoff at her answer and humourlessly chuckled.

"I was gonna go easy on you and let these guys do their own thing," his voice turned rough, something he didn't think he would do tonight. "But you were gonna give Jake an exemption and that– pay attention," he slapped her lightly when she moaned to his face. 

"Sorry, oppa," Della whined, finding it difficult to concentrate when Jake's mouth was pleasuring her so well.

"It pisses me off," Jay whispered roughly. "Instead of just calling the challenge off, you were gonna make the three of us wait 'til the end," he smirked at how hard she was struggling to contain her sounds of pleasure. He let go of her roughly to sit up."Sorry man, I gotta take it from here," he pat Jake's shoulder. 

"Mmkay," Della moaned loudly when Jake gave out one last suck to her clit. "I call dibs on cleaning her off though," he smiled widely while licking his wet lips.

"Deal," Jay immediately flipped Della over onto her stomach. "Tsk tsk tsk, Lala..." he swiftly took his shorts and boxers off in one go. "Stay down," he firmly instructed as he removed her restrains.

The three boys couldn't stop the grin when they watched Jay unleash his beast. The Jay they've seen before was nowhere near as aggressive.

"Have fun, bro," Sunghoon hollered. "Have fun, princess," he toasted his beer at Della when she made eye contact.

"I'm gonna fuck you now, yeah?" Jay whispered in her ear. He noticed the goosebumps that rose on her back as he was lifting her hips and parting her legs. "Hold on tight," he warned, handing her a pillow.

He bit the bottom of his sleeveless shirt just so he could get a clearer look of his shaft rubbing against her folds. 

"Aghh," both Della and Jay groaned when his full length entered her. "Fuckk!" after ten days, he knew he had to let Della adjust a little. Yet he also knew that she didn't need long based on how wet she is and how Sunoo had prepped her.

So not long after, he pulled back and thrusted into her. Hard.

"Ngghhh!" Della squeezed her eyes shut while tightly hugging the pillow. "Oppaaa!" she moaned loudly.

"God! I fucking missed this!" Jay grumbled out. The cloth was no longer in his mouth and he had his head thrown back. "Fuck!"

He kept his hands on her hips as he pounded into her. Slow, but powerful thrusts.

"Ahhh! Oppaaaa!" Della continued to moan loudly. "Oh my God!" she realised how noisy she was being, so she began to muffle her sounds into the pillow.

"Oh no you don't," Jay grunted. Instead of taking the pillow away from her, he decided to flip her onto her back. Essentially switching to the missionary position. "Oh hi there, sweetie," he smirked at her, leaning down to place a kiss on her lips. "Hold on," he forcefully placed her hands on his shoulders before resuming his thrusts.

"Shit!" Della gasped, struggling to maintain eye contact with Jay as he continued to fuck her in the same manner. "Jay-oppaaa!" she practically screamed. Her nails starting holding on for dear life, scratching the skin of his biceps and her mouth was stuck open with nonstop moans.

The three other boys were turned on as hell.

Jake kept adjusting the bulge in his pants while Sunghoon and Heeseung had to constantly shift in their seats.

Waiting was especially hard for Heeseung as he barely got to touch Della in ten days. So he downed two cans and working on his third in no time, making him slightly tipsy and extremely impatient. 

And the sight of her mouth opening just reminded him of something.

"That's it," he crawled across to Jella's side of the bed. "Sunghoon said we were moving to the bed, so you're not done sucking me off," he sat on his knees beside Della's. "Sorry, Jongseong-ah," he breathed out and helped guide Della's mouth to his length.

"By all means, hyung," Jay pulled away and halted his movement to let Della find a comfortable position. "You better do your best. We know you can do it, baby," he whispered to Della, taking off his shirt as he waited.

"Shittt!" Heeseung moaned practically straight after Della's mouth wrapped around him. "There you go, baby– just like that," he assisted by thrusting so that all she had to do was just suck around him and pump what she can't.

"I'll start moving again," Jay began thrusting as soon as he alerted Heela. "Aghh," he grunted, furrowing his eyebrows together. The view of Della sucking someone off in front of him just made him want to fuck her even harder.

He needs to hear her moans even if they were muffled.

"Ahh! Lala!" Heeseung whined when Della kept moaning around him. "Just like that! Sooo good! Nghh!"

Since his mind was foggy from the alcohol, he didn't even bother to hold back on his moans. Even when they start to get a little too subby.

Meanwhile, Sunghoon and Jake wanted to join in so badly, but fear that they would overwhelm their baby. Though they can't just sit there and do nothing.

So they decided to devise a plan for when their turn comes.

"Have you... ever done anal?" Sunghoon awkwardly asked Jake after covering his dick with a pillow. "Like do it from the butt?"

"Me or Della?" Jake's question made the ice prince slap his arm.

"Della, of course," Sunghoon scolded.

"Ack! No– I just gotta make sure I understood what you meant," Jake explained. "No, we haven't."

"I have and I brought condoms and lube," Sunghoon pointed at his luggage. "So here's the thing... Della has been quite curious to try like.. two people.. like.." Sunghoon tried to find the words to explain it in a way that Jake would understand, knowing that the guy mostly knows English sexual terms.

"Like at the same time? Double?" Jake asked while bringing his hands up for gesture.

"Uh, double," Sunghoon nodded, instantly feeling awkward again. "Do you... wanna try it with me? It's her first time and maybe you can do the... back because you've never tried it before."

Jake was quick to make up his mind, all thanks to the two beers he had downed.

"Let's do it," he raised his hand to dap Sunghoon up. "Jellahoon, am I right?"

"Of course," Sunghoon grinned.

"Fuck! I can't cum already!" Heeseung grit his teeth and slowed down his hips. "Lalaaa," he whined.

It was then when Della finally pulled away from the blowjob. She looked into his eyes whilst her hand kept pumping his shaft.

"Heeseung, babyy. What did I tell you about holding back?" she forced herself to restrain her moans just so she could remind him who's in charge.

Fortunately, Jay, who was finding the exchange amusing (also wanting Della all to himself during his orgasm), had slowed down his thrusts to help her focus.

"To never do that because only bad boys hold back," Heeseung's rational thoughts went straight out the window. He was fully going to show his dongsaengs that Lee Heeseung is a sub. A major one. "But I'm not even inside you yet!"

"Come here, baby," Della got up from her position. "I'll be back," she placed a quick kiss on Jay's lips. 

"Go ahead," Jay was so intrigued at his hyung and girlfriend's new side that he didn't care about his delayed orgasm— as long as he gets it straight after Heeseung reaches his.

"Poor babyy," Della cooed at Heeseung, brushing his hair back. "Why don't you sit comfortably and let Lala do the work?"

The 02z watched in amazement as they discover how their hyung is actually like in bed. They watched him obey Della's instructions like clockwork, as if he's done this a million times.

He rested his back against the pillows with his legs ajar. His large bambi eyes were stuck on Della the whole time, looking absolutely lovestruck.

"Take off your shirt," Della pointed lazily, getting on top of his lap. "You're a good boy, right?" she connected their foreheads together and aligned him to her entrance. 

All Heeseung could do was nod enthusiastically.

"Then don't hold back," Della whispered before sliding down on his length. 

"Ahh!" both Heeseung and Della let out high-pitched moans. As Della bounced up and down, Heeseung's hands automatically went to wrap around her waist.

"Sh-shit!" Heeseung hugged her tighter while squeezing his eyes shut. Because he was already close earlier, it took no time for him to reach that point again. "Lalaaa!"

"Feel so good, Heeseung– ahhh!" when it comes to Heeseung, Della (most of the time) tries to compose herself. She's taking care of him after all.

"Shit– is that what it looks like when Della rides you?" Sunghoon asked under his breath. "That's fucking hot."

His hand then tried to secretly stimulate himself, making sure that neither Jake or Jay could notice. Jay, on the other hand, was openly pumping himself, not caring that his best friends could be looking.

"Damn, you're pretty big, bro," Jake suddenly blurted out at Jay. "Nice one."

"Thanks, I guess," Jay chuckled and kept moving his hand, not feeling awkward in the slightest.

"Why were you looking at his dick?" Sunghoon snickered, but that brought Jake's attention to him and that's when the latter noticed his sneaky hand.

"Why are you secretly jacking off? Just do it like Jay, no balls!" Jake slapped his calf. "We're literally in the middle of a fivesun—"

"Fivesome," Jay corrected him.

"Fivesome!"

"Ew, no! I feel so exposed! Like I'll be jerking off in front of you!" Sunghoon completely removed his hand from his dick. "And it's easy for you to say! You're still fully clothed!"

"It's not like we've never seen you naked bef–"

"02z, if you're not gonna suck each other off then shut the fuck up," Della interrupted their bickering while making eye contact. "Your hyung's trying to cum in peace."

"Yes ma'am," "Sorry," "Sorry," they all apologised quietly, hoping that no one notices their erection hardening even more. They hate admitting their thirst for Della's dominance. 

Or to be accurate; They love her dominance, yet hate admitting their desire to be like Heeseung.

But it's not like the 02z have never been docile to DommeDella. 

"Sunghoon, don't be fucking weird or I'll repeat last month's occurrences," Della's threat immediately made Sunghoon's skin erupt in goosebumps. He just hopes that she won't elaborate and reveal to his friends what exactly happened.

Thankfully, she didn't.

"Are you okay, baby?" Della went back and cooed to Heeseung, keeping her pace steady as she cradled his head.

"I'm gonna cuuuum," he sobbed. "Fuck! Lalaaa!"

"There you go. Don't hold back, Heeseung baby," Della mustered up all the energy she had to quicken her pace.

"Ahhhh! Lalaaa!" Heeseung used his tight hold to assist her bounces before ultimately letting out a loud gasp as he released spurts and spurts of warm cum. "Oh my God, babyy," he sighed and relaxed his shoulders.

"Good boyy," Della halted her thrusts, caressing his hair lovingly. "Filling me up soo good," she placed tiny kisses on his head. "I love you, baby."

"I love you too, Lala," Heeseung breathed out. "Thank you," he pulled himself away to connect their lips.

They were stuck in a slow make-out session for a while before Jay grew impatient and pulled Della away from the older. 

"You didn't forget about me, did you?" Jay grumbled in her ear. "I gave you time to fuck hyung but now you forgot about us?" he lifted her up like she weighed nothing and placed her front facing down.

"You're being rude, Jay. Your hyung needed to—" Della cut herself off with a gasp when Jay landed a firm spank on her ass.

"You're not in control no more," he said in a low voice, lifting her waist up slightly. "Where are your manners?"

"I'm sorry, oppa," Della whimpered when he spread her pussy lips. She could feel Heeseung's cum slowly pouring out of her. As always, he came a lot.

"Shitt– hyung," Jay called for Heeseung to see. The latter had pretty much sobered up from earlier and is back to his usual self.

And at least for now, he still had not realised what he had done in front of his dongsaengs. 

"Keep it in, baby," Heeseung took two of his fingers and pushed the cum back inside her, causing Della to gasp. "Add onto it, Jongseong," he patted Jay's bare shoulder with his clean hand before heading towards the bathroom.

"My pleasure," Jay whispered. He wrapped his arms around Della's body and instantly pushed himself inside her once again. "Fuckkk, Della."

"Yess! Oppaa!" Della squeezed her eyes shut, letting out babbles of words that barely made any sense. She could feel Heeseung's cum slowly absorbing inside her as Jay fucked it deeper. The sounds of the moisture only turning on everyone in the room more.

"Fuck! You're gonna cum soon, aren't ya?" Jay's hard-but-slow pace tried to quicken when he felt Della tightening around him. "Just a little more, baby– Oppa's almost there, wait for me," he left kisses on the side of her face as he tried to concentrate on cumming together with his girl.

Fortunately for him, Della knows exactly what to do in this situation.

"Fill me up good, oppa. Make me feel so full," Jay had never verbally admitted it to her, but she knows that he has a breeding kink. "Stuff me full of—"

"FUUUUCK, I'm cumming!" Jay's left hand frantically went to search for Della's. "C'mere baby," while his right hand went to bring her face to his. 

They connected their lips together, essentially muffling their moans (and screams). Della used her free hand to hold onto his head, making the scene look even more sweet.

"I love you, Della," Jay mumbled against her lips.

"I love you, Jay," Della whined at the feeling of her own orgasm mixed with Jay's (and Heeseung's). "So, so much."

"So, so much," Jay left a final kiss on her forehead before getting off of her back. His eyes immediately went to her cum-filled entrance. "Good girl, keep it in," he grunted, his eyebrows furrowing at the sight of barely any cum leaking out. 

He chuckled when Della wiggled her ass for fun. "How cute," he slapped her ass and stood up. "Agh fuck, you really milked me dry."

"Come on, it hasn't been THAT long, guys," Della rolled her eyes. "We didn't even last the whole month."

Just as she finished talking, a harsher slap was placed on her ass.

"You fuck four men on a daily basis– you still think you could've handled it?" Sunghoon asked, flipping Della onto her back. "Do I also need to remind that you were the one who gave in first? YOU?" he grabbed onto her leg to pull her closer to the edge of the bed and closer to him. "Don't make me teach you a lesson."

"Go easy on her, Sunghoon-ah. She's about to receive a handful with you and Jaeyun," Heeseung reminded. He grabbed Jay's and his cans of beer before joining Jay on the bed. The two were now dressed in their boxers.

"Yeah, just shut up and let's do our shit," Jake impatiently took off his pants but kept his shirt on, only removing his zip-up. "You've done anal, baby?" Della nodded her head in enthusiasm. "Yeah? And you like it?"

"Mhmm! Are we doing what I think we're doing?" Jake chuckled at her excitement. 

"You're adorable. Isn't it gonna hurt, baby?" the tips of Jake's fingers began grazing Della's thigh.

"I wanna be closer to my men," Della gave out a seductive look to both Jake and Sunghoon, making sure to use Korean so Sunghoon would understand.

"How cute," Sunghoon mumbled. "Don't forget your safe words," he ran a hand through Della's hair before laying down on the bed, legs still seated on the edge.

"Is she getting on top of you or me?" Jake asked his partner. "Isn't it more comfortable with you on top?"

"I mean... It's easier for me to thrust but it's more comfortable for her to hug me, no?" Sunghoon explained. "Won't it be unstable if she lays on her back?"

"No– Della should be on her stomach, on her back is difficult, I think," Heeseung pointed at the three.

"Are you doing double?" Jay's eyes widened when he realised what they were discussing. 

"Uh," Jakehoon replied briefly.

"Then Della should be on her stomach and the one who does the back thrusts from behi– on top," Jay gave his take.

"No– the reason why I say she should be on her back is because she needs to be distracted from the pain and Sunghoon would be able to thrust and properly do that," Jake tried to explain his take. "Otherwise his movements are limite—"

Their discussion was cut off by a loud groan from Della, followed by the girl hovering over Sunghoon chest-to-chest.

"Stop taking so fucking long and just fuck me," she wasted no more time and slipped Sunghoon's cock into her entrance.

"Oh my God!" "Oh fuck!" the two hissed at the sudden feeling. 

"Fucking finally!" Sunghoon threw his head back. "Come here, kitten," he repositioned Della a little so he could move more comfortably. 

Thanks to his long legs, all he needed to do so was to hold her in place.

"So fucking tight," he said with gritted teeth. He was never one to make a lot of noises in bed, but with his buddies around, he's determined to look cool. He was gonna try to contain his facial expressions, which is something he never holds back on.

Yet his plan went straight out the window when Della adorably cuddled into his chest. 

"Oppaaa," she whined.

"Aww, kitten– my princess," he cooed, bringing one of his hands to hug her close. "Does that feel good, kitten?"

Della could only mew louder and nuzzle her head more, making all four boys coo at the sight.

"This seems enough for you, baby. Do you really need more?" Jake went up to her face to tease while his lubed finger equally teased her back entrance.

Della looked into his eyes and said the one name that the two have kept a secret for a long time. 

"Please, daddy?" 

Jake halted for a second, taken aback at the sudden change of mind. He was not one to be shy about his kink, but Della was a bit apprehensive that the members just won't understand.

But weirdly enough, none of the boys reacted, as if they already knew of the fact.

"Sunghoon, stop moving for a second," Jake went back to his position and squeezed more lube onto Della's hole. "Stay relaxed, darling," he warned Della before pushing a finger in.

"Mmm," she closed her eyes and pursed her lips.

"I'm right here, princess," Sunghoon whispered in her ear. "Relax some more," and immediately continued his movements.

"There ya go, good girl," Jake muttered, slowly twisting and pumping his finger. When Della was almost fully relaxed and resumed her previous moaning, Jake gradually added another finger in and followed by another once she adjusted to that as well. "Such a good girl."

"Ahh! I'm gonna cum!" Della announced, pushing her upper body up to catch a glimpse of what Jake's doing. "Fuck!" her eyes rolled back as she turned back to Sunghoon. "Oh my Goodness!" her moans only got louder when she looked at Sunghoon's facial expressions.

As always, his eyebrows were furrowed the whole time while he switched between biting/licking his lips, having his mouth open or gritting his teeth. He had completely forgotten about his initial plan of restraining himself.  

"Go cum, darling," he choked out, giving his last few hard thrusts after Della threw her head back and cried out. 

He almost let out a sigh of relief. If Della waited just a few seconds longer, he too would've been calling to cum and he did not want that just yet.

"Relax a bit, kitten," neither Sunghoon nor Jake pulled out, but they wanted to give Della time to catch her breath.

"What a good girl," Jay noticed Jake ripping open the condom wrapper and immediately sprung to action. "Taking four men so well," he continued to drop praises while caressing her hair.

"If it gets too much, please let us know and Jake can jerk off for the night or something," Heeseung also joined in with a joke.

"Hyung!" Jake whined. He somehow successfully got the condom on with just one hand, and is now lathering his length with the lube.

"Byee daddy" Jay added fuel to the fire by grinning and waving at him. 

"Shut the fuck up, Jay, I complimented you earlier," Jake sent a glare at his friend.

"The tension is insane. Now kiss," Della lifted her head to comment.

No matter how many times she has teased them, they have never expressed or voiced their discomfort, which she knows they aren't afraid to do. In Della's mind, this would imply that the possibility of it happening is not zero.

"Aish Lalaa!" "Eyy!" "Babe!" "Aghh" the four boys complained, with Jake adding an additional smack to her ass.

"You think his dick is big, right? You have my permission and sucking ONE dick does not make you ga—" 

"Okay, that's enough," Sunghoon spoke up and gave her one hard thrust. "Jake and I still need to cum, princess. Stop the yapping."

"I'm sorry, oppa," Della whimpered, bringing her head down to rest on Sunghoon's chest again.

"I'm only letting you off since you've been so good to us, understand? Don't test my patience," he said in a low voice, his hips starting to move in a steady pace once again.

"Understood," Della let out a high-pitched moan at the stimulus but was cut off with her own gasp as Jake pulled his fingers out.

"I'm putting it in," Jake breathed out. He squeezed some more lube on Della's rim before slowly entering. "FUCK!"

"Mmh!" Della had her eyes squeezed shut, trying to adjust to his size (especially with Sunghoon in her other hole).

"Our strong baby," "Such a good girl," Jay and Heeseung showered her in praises, using their hands to caress her arm and back while Sunghoon does so with her hair.

"Fuck– so fucking tight," Jake threw his head back when he was fully inside her. "Hang in there, baby, good job," he smoothed his hand over her ass.

"Yellow?" Heeseung asked about the safe word, just in case.

"Green," she quickly answered. "Can you move slowly, oppa?" her head shifted to make eye contact with Sunghoon.

"Of course, darling," he placed a kiss on her hair before slowly pumping her. "Shit, kitten," he squeezed his eyes shut and threw his head back.

Because of Jake, she felt tighter than usual but was still wet as ever. He knew he couldn't last long, especially after nearly cumming earlier.

"Jaeyun, please move," Della breathed out, starting to feel pleasure again.

Both Jake and Della let out a loud gasp at the sensation. The pace began to quicken in no time, making the scene look like it came straight out of an incognito site. 

"Oh my– fuuuuuuck!" Della moaned loudly, feeling fuller than she's ever felt. "Oppaaa! Daddyyyy!" little tears began pooling in the corner of her eyes. "Aaaaaaahhh!"

"So good, baby. Taking both of us so well," Jake leaned forward to mumble in her ear. "Shittt, so tight baby," his face held a large smile and left temporary hickies around her neck and shoulders. "My good girl."

There's no doubt that the back end is tighter, but Jake's favourite was really the sight of having two of her holes stuffed, and the fact that him and Sunghoon were the first ones to do that.

The three were so into each other that they didn't notice Heeseung getting up to retrieve Sunghoon's old, red iPhone. He knew that they would want the scene to be recorded— for their eyes only, of course.

"I'm recording," Heeseung announced before pressing record. They all turned to Heeseung for a second and resumed like nothing happened.

"Come here, kitten," Sunghoon grunted, pulling Della's face in for a kiss. She moaned into his mouth when she felt her two best friends quicken their pace. 

She noticed Jake tugging at her hair, so she broke the kiss off to then connect her lips with his, bringing a hand back to hold his head in place.

Jay, who did not want to just lay there beside them, started playing with Della's tits while palming himself. He personally doesn't need more, but he did not want the video to appear awkward. 

"You guys really look so fucking hot," Heeseung commented. He turned off the recording and went back to his original spot. "I wanna kiss, baby," his head got closer so Della could easily kiss him.

"FUCK! I'm cumming!" Della pulled away to scream out. Her eyes were closed shut and her open mouth spewed out loud whines after whine.

"Yesss, kitten," "Me too, baby, me too," Sunghoon threw his head back while Jake buried his face in her neck. It did not take the three long at all to reach their orgasm.

"Jay-oppaa," Della managed to let out, weakly stretching an arm out so he could come closer. "I haven't kissed you."

Jay felt his heart swell in adoration and he swiftly did as told without hesitation.

"Fuckk! Aaaahhh!" Della pulled away but kept their foreheads together and squeezed Heeseung's hand.

They looked absolutely ridiculous being in one big huddle (and it was certainly not the most comfortable), yet that was the moment when the five of them were just connected. It's what they needed and exactly what they hoped for tonight.

"I'm cumming, baby," Jake's voice was shaky, and his thrusts started faltering first. "Shit! Good girl, baby. Good girl, good girl!"

"Shit! Shit!" both Jake and Della came around the same time. The former usually takes his time to ride out his high but he almost instantly pulled out so Sunghoon could finish properly.

Sunghoon looked at him in thanks, immediately adjusting his position and hurriedly chased his orgasm. Della started shaking and screaming with overstimulation, letting go of Heejay to hold on tightly to Sunghoon.

"Shit! Ahh baby, almost ther– NOW KITTEN. NOW, now, now!" Sunghoon babbled a bit as his orgasm overtook his body. "Shit," he sighed and relaxed his body, still holding onto Della tightly. "You're amazing, princess. I love you," he chuckled breathily.

"I love you, my prince," Della breathed out with a smile.

The two shared a sweet kiss before Sunghoon pulled away and shifted Della over to Jake, who was now lying beside him.

"What a good girl.You're an absolute champ and you're incredible," Jake couldn't help but chuckle. "We're so fucking lucky, baby. I love you so much," he then connected their lips in a passionate kiss.

"I'M so lucky to have you guys and I just love you sooo much," once they pulled away, Della's head instantly went to rest on Jake's chest. "Let's clean up before we get too tired."

"Oh no you don't," Jake shifted their position so Della would lay on her back. He got on top of her with a mischievous grin on his face. 

"I called dibs on cleaning you off, remember?"

Eventually everyone washed up and got ready for bed. They decided to all sleep together on the makeshift king-sized bed with Della in the centre. They were cuddled closely, but it didn't really matter anymore to them.

"Guys, we're actually really cute," Heeseung giggled. "I fucking love this relationship."

"Just a bunch of bros with our girl" Jake sighed. He held Della tighter to his chest and shut his eyes, ready to sleep.

"For a second there, I thought you were gonna call me a hoe," Della giggled, looking up at him. 

"I'm never gonna call you a hoe, babe! I'm not Sunghoon!" Jake's reply made Sunghoon smack his shoulder.

"I will never call her that!" Sunghoon looked at him with betrayal. "I don't even know what that means but I know it's bad!"

"You call her names in bed, we all know it!" Jake protested back.

"Ya– rarely ever, right princess? Only on certain times and we both have no issues with it," Della nodded at Sunghoon's defence. "See?! Don't kinkshame me, daddy."

"YAA!" Jake shaking Sunghoon's leg off of his own. 

"Today's session just revealed everyone's kinks," Jay laughed. "Sunghoon likes to call Della 'kitten', Jake likes to be called 'daddy', Della apparently likes anal," he stopped himself for saying Heeseung's out of respect.

"Pffftt, okay mister kinky. Didn't know you could go hard like that," Sunghoon grinned. "I thought you just liked vanilla but you were slapping Lala and everything."

"Why do you like to get slapped?" Jay ignored Sunghoon and asked the girl he was semi-holding.

"I don't know! Sometimes I just like things!" Della shrugged defensively. "I like a whole bunch of things!"

"Yeah and your boyfriends all like different things too," Sunghoon chuckled. "You're absolutely perfect for us."

"Awww," Della grinned but got shy and hid her face in Jake's chest. "I'm sorry for making you all join No Nut November. This was really dumb and I'm also really sorry for losing to someone who didn't even join."

"Don't worry about that, darling. It's all forgiven and practically forgo—" Jay's words were cut off by the boom of Heeseung's voice beside him.

"WAIT!" Heeseung shot up straight in realisation. Della and Jake both jumped in surprise while Sunghoon and Jay flinched. Heeseung looked back at them with horror in his eyes.

There was a reason why he was quiet the whole time. It's because it just hit him how;

"YOU GUYS FUCKING SAW ME IN MY WEAK STATE!"

i gotta be honest, i hate to be that person but i was feeling really insecure about my writing tbh. like the first draft was not hot AT ALL and i wanted this long awaited/overdue smut to make you guys all hot and bothered y'know? i think it's much better now and i'm feeling both proud and insecure but i hope you enjoyed it and happy anniversary! taglist: @duolingofanaccount @lalalalawon @clar-iii @deafeningballoonpeach

[angel-eyes05]

i remember his hands - chapter 3

PAIRING: kang the conqueror x fem!reader

SUMMARY: after a scientific experiment goes horribly wrong, you've been transported to the quantum realm and have been stuck there for the past decade. with no company, aside from janet van dyne, your life changes forever when a mysterious man in a golden ship crash lands next to your settlement. startled with his initial presence, you two have a rocky start. but as time goes on, you two find each other slowly drawn to one another. you have secrets though, and he has a past he refuses to bring up. can you two make it through navigating an unknown world together, discovering any ulterior motives, and stand the test of time in a place where time has no meaning at all?

INFO: slow romantic burn, pretty fast sexual burn, kinda enemies to lovers????, takes place during that little flashback janet has during quantumania, idk how accurate this is gonna be to canon stuff cause i get very confused about the quantum realm lol, reader is in mid to late 20s while kang is in his “early 30s” (ik he like technically doesn't age or whatever idk the lore but i just made it accurate to jonathan majors age and wanted to give an accurate age range/gap/count), y/n will be very fleshed out like im gonna give her everything lol

WARNING: explicit language, smut (minors dni), masturbation (f), oral sex (fem receiving), cum play, not a very happy ending (guys aftercare is important)

CHAPTER WORD COUNT: 2.5k

NOTES: i just wanna say thank you for all the love recently! idk if ill set a specific schedule for when ill release the chapters or not cause honestly i just work better whenever i write when i want without a time constraint so thats probably what i’ll end up doing. if you want me to write a specific one shot for kang or even another character (i feel most comfortable writing for mcu, star wars, the last of us, and stranger things, but if i know the piece of media youre talking about and feel comfortable writing about the character, im down) just lmk! also i decided at the last second this was gonna be a smuty chapter so..yeah!

PREVIOUS PART

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It had been about two weeks since you found Kang at the crash site. Despite the moment you two had when you first fixed him up, you two had very little interactions since then. It made sense though. Both of you were taking your own separate times to heal, you in your room, bedridden from your horrible headaches, him on the couch, still unable to walk due to his foot and abdomen. According to Janet, he hasn’t been very talkative. He would occasionally respond to her comments about how he was feeling, but wouldn’t say anything about where he came from or why he was here. So she just stopped asking. It took a while for you to open up to Janet about how you got here at first as well though, so you understood why he would be all shut up about it. It got you thinking about how you ended up here. How much you left behind. God you wish you got the chance to leave a note or something. At the very least, for them…

You quickly dragged yourself out of that thought, knowing the path it would lead you down led to nothing but wasted tears. It was late at night, and you laid sleepless in your bed, so it was easy to let your mind wander. To distract yourself, you replayed the moment with him in your mind. You were a little touch starved, in that way at least, so feeling Kang’s hand in that sensitive of an area drove you mad. Thinking about it would always give you the same reaction. Butterflies slowly fluttering into your stomach, roses blooming onto your cheeks, and the near uncontrollable urge to touch yourself. You know your relationship was non existent right now and had a horrible start, but sometimes you wondered what would happen if you walked over to the couch right now and started to kiss him. The only thing you ended up doing though was changing your now soaked underwear.

You always felt bad when you let yourself think like that. Poor guy was probably just looking for something to hold while he was in pain. And you were taking advantage of it. Then again, you remembered how he slowly pulled his fingers away from your thigh once you were finished stitching him up, an act that did seem very purposeful. Again though, he might have done that unconsciously. You always sent yourself into this back and forth inner dialogue with yourself about his intentions in that moment. Whether you liked it or not, during the past two weeks, you’ve only had two things on your mind: your pain, and him.

With the mix of your restless mind, the ache between your legs, and your now grumbling stomach, you decide to get out of bed and go to the kitchen to find something to eat. Also partially because you would get to see him, awake or not. To be honest, you preferred him asleep. You could just admire him from a far, without the complexities of a conversation to mess anything up. You crept into the hallway, adjusting your eyes from the dim light in your room to the rest of the house, enveloped in the darkness. Thankfully, you knew the layout of the house well, so you doubted you would trip over anything. You wandered throughout the cabin until you got past Janet’s room and into the kitchen. You didn’t realize how flawed your plan was, it just now clicking that you wouldn’t be able to see Kang in the darkness. You didn’t entirely mind though. Just knowing he’s in the same room as you put your thoughts slightly at ease. 

You finally make it to the counter and put your arms out to find something. They land on a round, spiked fruit. Too scared of accidentally cutting yourself if you use a knife to peel it, you decide just to bite into it. Juice drips down from your mouth as your teeth sink into the fruit. Although the food here was no where near as good as back home, you managed to find a few gems here. The fruits were definitely one of them. Once you finish with the fruit, you use the sleeve of your loose shirt to wipe your mouth. You paced the room a bit, still kind of restless. Your eyes still haven’t entirely adjusted to the dark, but you think you have a pretty good standing of your ground. That is until you trip over the back of the couch. You brace yourself for the impact of flying over the couch and waking up everyone in the process, until you’re suddenly stopped.

It’s a hand. No, not just a hand. The hand. His hand.

Again, it stays there longer than it should have. Placed just below where your sternum meets your breasts. You could feel your heart beating faster the longer his hand stayed there. “You’re a loud chewer” Kang finally said. It was more of a deep whisper though. God you loved the sound of his voice, despite the few times you heard it. “You must be a light sleeper then” you replied in a similar tone. Despite still not being able to see his face, you could tell he was smirking. He slowly push you back up to your normal position. The trick was that he didn’t move his hand. He actually tightened his grip on your shirt. That’s when it clicked for you. He wanted it just as bad as you did. 

You then placed your hand over Kang’s, rubbing deep circles just below his knuckles with your thumb. Then, he began to pull you by your shirt to the front side of the couch. You followed his hand until he stopped pulling, leaving you in the same place you were when you stitched up his shoulder. You stood there as he began to move his hand down from your sternum. The feeling of him dragging his fingers down your body at an agonizingly slow pace was enough to get your starved pussy wet. Then he got to your hips, where your loose pants rested. He then took his other hand and used both hands to drag your pants off. Once you kicked them off, he went back up to your panties, hooking his pointer finger around the sides of them and dragged those off even slower than the pants. 

He then placed his hands on your bare hips, digging his thumbs into them. A slight moan escaped your lips. In response, he placed his finger over your mouth in a shushing action. “She can’t hear you.’’ You were overcome with embarrassment at the fact you were so enveloped in the thought of having sex with Kang that you forgot that Janet was only a room away. You decided now you had to be silent, however hard that would prove to be later. He put that hand back on your hip and helped you onto his chest. You placed your hands over his shirtless shoulders, being mindful of his left one. You pressed your hands deeply into them and began to massage them. Thank god your eyes had finally adjusted to the dark, because now you could see every emotion playing across his face as you sunk your hands deeper into his shoulder muscles. You moved the massage down his arms, making your way to his biceps. They were massive and tough. All you could think about was how much you wanted them around your neck. Ironic. Once you moved on from those and finally made it to his hands, you took hold of them.

You used them to help you take off your shirt and bra. After tossing your bra to the floor, you placed his hands on your breasts and began to grope them with his hands. His eyes rolled back into his head, and as soon as you could tell he was about to moan, you smashed your lips into his to capture it. You took your hands off of his to cup his jaw to fully envelop yourself in the kiss. He kept one hand on your breast while he moved the other one down and began to run circles around your clit. You softly moaned into his mouth with each rotation he made. As each second went by, the kiss became more intense. More desperate. You had no idea how long it had been since he had touched someone like this, and you knew it had been forever since you were touched like this. You two both had some desperation to your actions. Like this would be the last time either of you would experience something like this ever again. Both of you so starved of touch. You needed this so badly, and part of you knew he needed it too.

As he began to circle your clit with more ferocity, you felt the heat in your chest growing stronger. God he had just started and you were already about to come. You didn’t to yet. If you did, that meant it would be over. Lucky for you, you felt his hand pull away from your clit. He pulled away from the kiss ass well, panting. “I need you to help me up for a second” he said. You reluctantly got up, wondering if he was just going to leave you here like this. It was just now that you realized how naked you were. Sure, he didn’t have a shirt on, but you still felt much more exposed than him for some reason. You helped him up onto his feet, also now realizing exactly how much taller he was than you. Seeing him staring down at you like that. Like you had suddenly become the most important thing in the world to him. Suddenly, he turned you around and shoved you onto the couch. You sat there as he kneeled down and began too kiss your inner thighs.

He moved those strong, dry hands of his to the top of your thighs and sprayed them out against them. He dug his fingers into them as he moved his mouth from your inner thigh to your lips. Feeling his warm breath against them in the cold room sent shivers down your spine. You grabbed the top of his head for leverage as you thrust your hips into his mouth.  “Look at you” he said in between kisses. “Being such a good girl and getting so wet for me. Seems like you completely forgot about the fact we were trying to kill each other two weeks ago.” It was strange to you a little. You had convinced yourself you wouldn’t be safe in the same house as Kang, and now here you were, completely naked on the couch with him eating you out. 

He wasn’t doing enough though. You weren’t nearly as satisfied as you were when he was circling your clit. He had yet to stick his tongue in you, all he was doing was kissing your folds. He was just teasing you again. “P-please” you said desperately. “I-I need y-you d-deeper.” He removed his mouth from your area and moved his hand to your clit again as he talked to you to keep you stimulated. “Oh thats what you want now? Am I not doing enough for you? Because I could stop if that’s what you prefer.” “N-n-no!” you nearly shouted out. “P-please, I-I j-just wanna f-feel you.” He sat there for a moment thinking, fingers still on your clit. “P-please Kang-g.” You asked again, looking deep into his eyes. “Well, since you asked so nicely. And plus, how could I say no to someone as pretty as you. Sitting there so neat and ready for me.” 

Next thing you know, he dives back in, his tongue licking all over your folds and into your pussy. Your strangled moan makes one strange noise, but he must have liked it because he moved his hands up to grab deep into your hips in response. God you could stay here for hours. Layed here sprawled out on the couch with him eating you out. You just wish you could moan and whine for you. You wanted so desperately to scream his name out into the world and let it know how much he had you under his grasp. And you knew he wanted it also. But that was part of the appeal of everything. Knowing you had to stay quite. It made it more enticing. But man you couldn’t wait until you had the cabin to yourself. When he could fuck you through your bed properly, where you could scream his name at the top of your lungs, and him with yours. For now though, you would take this. It was enough for what you needed right now.

As he moved his tongue from your folds to your swollen clit, he begins to suck on it. You felt the heat return back to your core as you itched with pleasure, a roaring tide begging to wash from your pelvis into his mouth. The heat of his breath on you, the tightening grip of his hands on your hips, his tongue fluttering over your folds and clit, the soft hums he would make after tasting you. “F-fuck K-kang. I-I-I’m gonna c-cum” you said, the words barely making it out of your mouth without being mixed with a moan. He nods slightly in approval, gliding his tongue over your folds like silk and moving on of his hands to circle your clit to help pull it out of you. Finally, you feel the wave escape your pussy. You grab a pillow near you and release all your moans and screams into as the ecstasy exits you and enters his mouth. You arch your back as he tries to swallow as much of your cum as he can. You’re blinded by the intensity of your orgasm as your thighs tense up and you can hardly move anything, except to move the noises out of your mouth.

Once you finish, Kang stays there, licking off the last of your essence off your folds and feeling your throbbing clit under his tongue. He backs away from your pussy and moves up to your mouth as he kisses you, sharing with you some of your cum. He uses your shirt to clean up his mouth and the remaining bits of cum from your folds. To your surprise though, after that, he tosses the shirt on the floor, stands up, and walks away to your room. In shock, you convince yourself he went to your room to grab you a new change of clothes. Once you hear the door close though, you snap yourself back into reality. Looking down at yourself, naked and trembling (part from the cold and part from the orgasm), embarrassment floods your body. You couldn’t believe how easy you gave yourself up for him. God you knew you were desperate, but you didn’t know you were that desperate. And there he was in the other room, sleeping in your bed. Leaving you there on the couch, laying out naked, waiting for someone to take you away like some fantasy. But there you were. Alone. And really fucking cold.

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NEXT PART

A/N: yeaaaaaaaah, i needed drama so i did that. sucks but i didnt have any other ideas sorry lol. hope you liked the chapter though! this was actually my first time writing smut so i hope i didnt do that bad. looking forward to chapter 4!!! also sorry i didnt really proofread this one either cause it was super late when i posted it so sorry

[calamitaswrath]

Cal Lucia plays Fire Emblem Path of Radiance: Chapter 20

Daien's to the north, in the frigid and cold areas, and is the antagonist nation, hm? Guess they've taken some inspiration from Rigel from Gaiden for that.

Oho, Soren's bringing up the topic of a potential spy among their ranks? Him showing the initiative could mean that he's trying to divert attention from himself, all while framing somebody else to be the scapegoat. . . assuming that he is the spy, of course.

Mist's medallion is gone! And after we just learned its meaning, too. Titania also knows what's up with it, I assume? And Soren is being highlighted as being quiet in response to that. . . you're not doing a good job at making you seem less suspicious.

Petrine and Shiharam having a talk. Is that guy Jill's father? The hair colour'd imply it at least, even if his name is a lot more out there than hers.

Also ominous orders from Petrine. I guess we're not learning what those are til the map starts.

Oh no, it's already being mentioned. Sluices being opened.

Uh, that's a neat little departure from how things are usually done: Soren is actually asking Ike whether he wants to hear the report of the last battle. A small touch, but a nice one.

Base conversation between Ike and Reyson, and- excuse me, Heron Laguz can read people's minds??? What???

And then there's also a base conversation with "woman". Three stars, too, so it's bound to be something noteworthy.

Ah, this has all the makings of a character recruitment. Calill, hm? Can't say I have ever heard of you, but it seems like we have a new addition to the list of "woman lowkey hitting on Ike and him not caring".

. . .Also not sure whether I love her or hate her based on that intro. I'd have to see more from her to say, but unfortunately I don't think that I'll be able to really use her since I already severely struggle with using all the characters I want to use (meaning, most of everyone).

Soren's talking about how the sluice gates being closed means that the water will be gone within 12 hours. . . well, given that this mission will obvious be a success, I can already tell that something is going to happen in that forced wait time.

Mh, a map with a time limit? Well, that should be no problem.

Got Jill deployed, lol.

Oh, some proper characterization for the boss in this chapter! I mean, stands to reason since he's Jill's father, but it's still very nice to see.

. . .Aaaand I left Reyson in enemy range. Starting again!

Accidentally left Jill in the range of an enemy archer, and she tanked a crit. How are you doing?

It's actually also pretty nice to see the villagers react with outright vitriol towards the Crimean army, makes for a nice change. Also a neat touch that there's only old people left.

Well, I got the requirements for Jill not defecting, it seems. Had her talk to her father, and it all worked out fine. Boyd got the kill via a crit, but you know.

Crimean army's helping the people. Not much to say here. It's expected.

Interested to see where things are gonna go with Darahan, though. An old friend among Begnion's Pegasus Knights?

Ohh, cut to Daien, and somebody handing it over. That at least narrows things down to the spy being male. . . which doesn't really narrow things down all that much, actually.

Hmm, so the spy's not acting on his free will. . .

So it's Nasir after all! Kind of a shame actually, I think it being Soren could have also made for some interesting story developments. Still, curious to see what leverage Daien has over Nasir. Is he maybe related to Ena somehow? They do both have these markings on their forehead.

[lqfiles]

heyy uhm thjs is my first time sending these kind of things and i js wanted to say that i really really reallyyyyy love stg, i've been reading it since chapter 10ish? but started following at about 20ish (srry abt that) and ik it doesn't mean much coming from an anonymous person but it makes me very happy (and PROUD) to see how many people are reading it now and how many asks you get :) overall im js immensely proud of you and your work

again ik it does not mean much coming from an anon but still you have no idea how great my days get when i get notis from your acc replying to questions or anons (cause i've figured it usually mean that you'll upload another chapter) ANYWAYS i've been struggling a LOT these few months, and one of the only things I seriously look up to is stg, so again, thank you SO so much :(

you don't even have to reply to this or anything (bc tbh i wouldn't know what to say either lol) but i would appreciate it if you could at least read it and know just how much power your ideas and writing actually have <3

also not sure if 50 was the last chapter (?) i was planning on writing smth like this when the smau ended BUT ITS WHATEVER RLLY !! anyways i will never be able to thank u enough for taking your time in this and genuinely putting effort and feelings on it, you are amazing !!

also im from Chile so idk if i made any mistakes while typing this… whatever i'll make sure to support you through each and every work of yours from now on ! take care <333

(god this was a little long IM SORRY again you don't have to reply to this i js hope u read it and know just how capable and dedicated you are and how happy you can make other people iwnsnsks <3)

anon you actually made me tear up wthh :(( LONG ANSWER INCOMING……

i think this is the best thing i could’ve been told and hear, and the fact that it’s anonymous doesn’t change how much your words mean to me trust me. i honestly wasn’t sure how commited i’d be to this smau since i never have managed to finish a slow burn ideas because of the lack of creativity. but i think the fact that you still kept up from such an early chapter (when i remember pointing out that i’m really just writing this without a full plot yet multiple times) is endearing and don’t worry, i don’t take it to heart that you didn’t follow me immediately loll, for all you knew this could’ve been the shittiest piece of writing and then you’d have to just unfollow lmaooo. also i think it’s cute that those who have kept up from early on until now have witnessed with me the growth of this series and the support on it 😭 i remember when 70 notes in day alone excited me and would get giddy by getting a SINGLE ask hsjdjdjd and now i’ve had chapters with 400 notes and get 10+ asks ??? i didn’t even really dwell on it that you guys who have been ogs too have seen the growth too :(( i think it’s quite funny, because last year, i rarely got any asks and barely checked on this account except for posting some drabbles here and there, and didn’t even speak to any mutuals, i remember i told myself i’d keep this a writing blog only without interacting much at all but ever since stg i’m surprised by the amount of mutuals i’ve made and how many people are really perceiving my account AND how interactive i’ve been even tho i’d usually log out immediately after posting something lmaoo! it’s cute and i appreciate you for sticking around and being proud of me !!! it honestly catches me off guard when some of you say that stg is the highlight of your day or how much you love it or how it has inspired you to start writing yourself, because i can’t comprehend myself being influential like that at ALL 😭😭 but at the same time it warms my heart every time because it makes me feel useful…? i like seeing people happy and feel inspired by something i did so seeing people be so happy of a mere chapter really does make me smile :) i’m sorry to hear that life is hard on you, but again it means a lot to me knowing stg DOES affect your day positively (can’t believe we’ll be reaching the end tho..)

this wasn’t the last chapter, i got two more and then some bonus chapters so i hope you’ll enjoy them and my future work as well anon <33 i’ll continue to pour my effort and feelings into my writing love you and thank you for making time to write this !!!

[msookyspooky]

Im in vacation rn, so I had some time and decided to reread your panic fic entirely. And OH MY GOOODDDDD, YESSS!!!!! Your fic is literally 1 of the 3 fics I actually got so fucking invested in that I check for new chapters almost daily!!!!!!! It's literally so good and exciting! I have been here since you started to write the 1 movie and likeee you managed not only to stay w the same writing quality over all this time, but to better yourself in this craft!!! ??????? I could see your improvement in your writing and ughhhhhhy you were already good and now you're just amazing 💜💜💜💜💜 just really wanted u to know that lol

STTTOOPPPPP this made me get almost teary eyed and blush bc that is so incredibly thoughtful and sweet to say 💘🥺 I struggle with perfectionism badly to the point I don't write my own books bc of it (Slowly getting over it and just writing damn it!)

But to hear that I have improved is such a compliment you have no idea! 😭💞

Life has really been testing my ambition since September. Really since 2 February's ago tbh... like I turned 27 2 weeks ago and I'm like "You mean 25, right?" And no honey, 27 🥲. Not even the age as much as feeling life has just been throwing me nothing but bs bombs over and over. But this last September till now has been fucking brruutttaalll. But you guys with this love and these reviews and messages seriously has kept me writing. If it wasn't for messages like these I would've quit this fic a year ago but these aare just so motivating to just dust myself off and get back on the horse! Fuck it! If the writing isn't perfect at least Ik you guys will like it even if I don't 🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤

Ily sm for leaving me this thank you and I hope you had such a good vacay!!

[hirudou]

@mirrorfates asked: do jade, azul and floyd rn

JADE/LEECH

How I feel about this character

dunno if it's obvious- but i absolutely adore jade. he's quickly become my favorite character in twst. and my favorite muse i've written in a very long time. there is something i really love about characters like him. he's complex, two faced and manipulative. but still has a charm that makes him deceptively wholesome, friendly and inviting. best of all, people assume a lot about him, and he rarely goes out of his way to correct them. if other's assumptions are wrong( and they often times are )it's not his problem. they get to deal with the consequences. and don't even get me started on the more terrifying aspects of his character. if given the opportunity i really could talk about this eel for HOURS...

All the people I ship romantically with this character

mmmm...i don't have a lot for him tbh. he's a romantic character, but he isn't really the best for a healthy relationship. that said, jade/azul is my #1 hands down, the two of them absolutely manipulate each other, but usually to the others benefit. there's also the fact that...they've known one another since grade school( the equivalent anyway ). i have a lot of thoughts and ideas on these two actually. the kind of thing that deserves it's own post. which........i've sworn to write in the past ik ik.

a few though that i've been introduced to and enjoy-- are jade/riddle, jade/idia, and jade/yuu. each have very unique dynamics, and ofc with jade being jade...well.

My non-romantic OTP for this character

rook and jade are actually...no joke, one of my favorites here. they're both really really weird, and as i've discussed before...have really opposite mentalities. and these can clash in...surprisingly positive ways. it may seem like a stretch, but rook being a hunter, i feel they could easily connect over the outdoors. they really could be besties guys-- and they'd stay besties well past NRC.

sebek and jade too-- a bit more antagonistic, but their interactions during harveston made me so happy. they'd easily bond over food, i just know it.

honestly...the list here is pretty long. jade might be suspicious, but he has a lot of people who might consider him a friend...

My unpopular opinion about this character

IDK if it's unpopular really, but i have voiced my opinion about the fandom's general interpretation of his character. and the idea he could ever be considered yan/dere makes me laugh rlly hard. like no, of any character you could pick to fall into that trope jade ought to be the last.

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon.

let jade drown someone. i wanna see it happen.

AZUL/ASHENGROTTO

How I feel about this character

azul is, just like the twins, very precious to me. funny enough, growing up the little mermaid was my absolute favorite movie. and ursula was my favorite character. so when i saw azul i was like !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! then i saw the twins and i was so excited! as soon as i finished chapter three my fate was SEALED! he also has a very relatable story for me: i was bullied a lot too growing up. granted, i don't have magic to curse people with....and im not an octopus( bummer ik ). but still, his character rlly resonates with me as sb who grew up dealing with hurtful classmates. All the people I ship romantically with this character as i said in the prev one jade/azul is my favorite!!

and i doooo....like some of the others i've seen. but i haven't really looked into dynamics there. as i...don't write the muses LOL. My non-romantic OTP for this character

i mean azul and the tweels in general.......pretty obvious. like i could give you a LOT of reasons why the friendship they have is...actually very good.

others i like are jamil, malleus, vil, and of course-- yuu. My unpopular opinion about this character

he's actually one of the character i haven't really disagreed with people on. i like him as is. i have thoughts, headcanons, opinions-- but nothing unpopular... One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon.

i want to see azul grow one his octopus legs back ...

FLOYD/LEECH

How I feel about this character i love him just as much as i love jade tbh. he's super fun, unpredictable, and very complimentary to his brother's more subdued personality. despite his capricious nature, and unsettling demeanor...floyd is very easy going. he can be lighthearted without being overly goofy. it's so hard to nail down characters like that-- but i feel like they did a good job here. All the people I ship romantically with this character

floyd/yuu is my favorite LOL, it's just cute!! that's all! silly little shrimpy, goes to see his bball games, and goes swimming w/ him. i think despite a rocky start, and with his general demeanor and behavior-- floyd can be a surprisingly good motivator for yuu to take it easy. yanno, to not sweat the small things.

another i've seen that i haven't really dove into? floyd/riddle. i can see the appeal there, but im weird ig. and don't really dive deep into ships for characters i don't write-- or plan on writing hgfjdhgjhf. My non-romantic OTP for this character

dawg, if floyd tried he could probably be friends with most people. he's just not as inclined to be fake...the way his brother is. capricious as he is, im sure maintaining long standing friendships is a challenge-- but well worth it.

i LOOOOOOOOOVE the basket ball club trio. they're seriously so silly, but it's clear they support and care about one another. i would kill for them fr. My unpopular opinion about this character

i do not think floyd is stupid. i just think he doesn't care, he wouldn't be in octa if he wasn't intelligent, or clever. is that unpopular??? i don't think so. i think most people feel the same way tbh. One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon.

idk actually, my wishes and dreams for floyd's character have been fulfilled...i just wanted him to score a slam dunk and i got that.

GIVE ME A CHARACTER...

[m1ckeyb3rry]

Love me some angst!! So true though I can imagine it kinda being like the “want what you can’t have” thing where you’d have to be uninterested to catch his eye..also I’m so excited to read every installment makes me stan bestie a little more like where’s my irl girlie like this??

Oh yeah stagnant is the word I’m looking for…I’ve never prayed on the downfall of a duo so hard before they NEEDED that breakup no matter what all the fans say like please let them develop!! As you mention later in your reply I do think kaneshiro has something in mind for nagi I’m just hoping it happens soon!! What kinda also throws me off a bit is I think in a recent interview kaneshiro mentions that Nagi has no friends outside of reo even within bllk? And I’m like wait what about Isagi chigiri and Bachira at least they literally went bowling together and were gonna meet at a cafe together??? I don’t think you do that with people not considered friends but whatever ig :|

Based off what they’ve all spouted mid match they DEF have a mean streak LMAO gotta let out all that teenager rage somewhere…even polite mom friend yuki based of NEL scenes LOL but I love the duality of it all!

Loser on loser crime fr…reminds me of that one line from the mobile game where Nagi’s like “sheesh rin you have no friends” like boy ik ur not talking

The soccer freak always gets me because the way Rin’s presented makes him seem super popular BECAUSE of his soccer dedication flipping it around and making it his weakness just makes it hit harder

That makes sense! I’ll admit some scenes of him are done nicely but yeah also not exactly my type oops, when I was typing out my last response I was kinda thinking about how his backstory is uh…a little bland…like yeah a passionate boy about soccer but other than that he’s got a healthy family and basically no trauma (good for him!!) but yeah I mean other than his mindset on like evolution not much to explore imo

Get. Out. I was an MLP kid too LMAOOO you’re so right about rainbow dash I feel like maybe he’d try to cover himself up with like king sombra too (shadowy villain to match his ninja shadow steps thing or wtv) and I honestly don’t know how he pulls sm he seems like such a dork too like, ninja butt trap?? Saying bam (bakyuun) at like every other sentence….bro is a geek and it’s showing LMAO I bet he’d be into ninjago

OVER 15K we’re eating good guys…I’m also like constantly lurking the tags waiting for things to pop up which is where I first found you actually LOL I swear the karasu tag was dry as HELL for a good 6 months I kept finding stuff on a diff karasu from some other series and the Otoya and yuki tags are like even drier like please someone…you’re literally saving me rn I have never seen this much Karasu content like. Ever. I would contribute more if I knew how to write but for now I’ll just stick to ideas ig LMAO

That panel living rent free in my brain…more like I’m paying it to stay there omg I cannot wait…I’m also hoping that tabieitaken still get some spotlight in the manga too (I’m so glad Karasu isn’t obsolete in PxG) because how did they go from top 345, not score at all in the u20 match, and like we barely see them in nel (barcha done so dirty don’t even get me started…) like bring the boys back please I know they were the top in bllk for a reason!!

Also I really hope it also gets revealed somewhere the tracks of all the teams?? I wanna find out how they get yuki eventually LOL I tried making a chart myself but lost my mind 3/4 of the way in because I realized things didn’t match up and the many locked off npcs make it hard to accurately discern anything eugh…but trust once 1) that epinagi chapter comes out 2) the light novel for yuki comes out I will be back here flooding your inbox…(as if I don’t alr oops)

- Karasu anon

yes exactly i think you would have to make him feel smth different from how he normally does for him to remain interested long-term. w fwtkac bestie it’s the fact that they dislike another which could lead to a possible romance because he’s so used to girls liking him and him liking them in return that their feud would force him to get to know her in a diff way almost?? idk if that makes sense. and hehe i just posted the last part and bestie is VERY prominent in it so i hope you enjoy!! she truly is such a funny character i love writing her and reader together

YES the breakup was needed!! and everyone who talks abt nagi falling off…yeah he needed that too or else he’d never be able to have a proper character arc 😭 i think w regards to that he just said that nagi isn’t CLOSE to anyone but reo!! which does make sense to me. we see him interacting and being friendly w bachira isagi and chigiri (even karasu surprisingly) but he seems like the type who wouldn’t let anyone in right away. i do think he enjoys hanging out w them and probably considers them chill buddies but he wouldn’t invite isagi to his depression nest apartment the way he did reo. or maybe i’m just overthinking it and he actually just hates everyone 😫

yuki is honestly willing to throw hands at any moment he just seems chill compared to tabieita because those two are on another level 😭 HAHA actually though i’m p sure otoya is the least mean on-field…he kinda just dgaf meanwhile karasu and yuki actively degrade other players 😔 but otoya is so…interesting…off field that it makes up for it (negatively)

HAHAHA omg loser on loser crime fr…pls nagi is actually so mean tbh which makes sense because he is a gamer but also it’s so funny because we’re introduced to him as this apathetic chill guy and then the instant he meets barou he pulls out an entire ARSENAL of insults 😭 yeah i think outside of bllk that dedication to soccer is not making bro popular…like he has no time for friends or hobbies or anything because he’s busy practicing so it’s very much “the best but at what cost”

shidou def has some cool scenes!! and some uh. well. LMAOO but same with isagi like there’s some scenes where i can kinda see the appeal but for the most part he’s too chill and basic looking/acting for me. i also think it’s so funny that some of the characters have such crazy backstories (kaiser, yuki) and then isagi just grew up upper middle class 😓 zero issues in his life just vibes

OMGGG MLP FANS RISE UP my fav was rarity because she’s literally me but i also really liked princess cadence!! and that whole movie w her wedding actually was really good although i obv haven’t watched in ages. HAHAH no you’re so right though he is such a loserrr i honestly think if he ever got over himself and settled down he would be one of the best bfs in bllk just because he’s so secretly unserious. he’s definitely the type to have been super into like. pokémon (projecting because i love pokémon) or smth and he would give entire speeches about why his favorites are the best ones (NOT clickbait 3am gone wrong) and how he plans on beating the champion. he also is so chill i feel like if you tried to prank him or do smth like put makeup on him he’d just be like “ok 👍” and go along with it 😪 IF ONLY HE WASN’T A CHEATER 😕

omg no because i thought the karasu tag was empty and then i tried looking for otoya content (help he’s grown on me so bad) and it was EMPTY. forget abt yuki broooo nobody even knows him 😭 and YES it ended up at 16.1k as i’m sure you saw!! sooo long 😫 also wait that’s so funny…idt i had posted any karasu fics before your requests which post did you find me through??

if you ever do decide to try writing lmk i will def read it!! honestly it all comes down to practice + i’m sure you’re much better than you realize 💖

YES BRO WHY ARE YUKI AND OTOYA GHOSTING ATM??? i can even kind of understand otoya because he’s on a diff team and whatnot and at least his nel ranking is good but yuki is quite literally on bm why did he vanish after mancity 😓 also yesss omg bm vs barcha didn’t even feel like a nel game at all!! i saw a post where someone said they would’ve rather seen tabieita heading a nel team instead of reonagi and honestly i agree because that’s 3 and 4 in bllk right there plus they were introduced as having the best teamwork in all of bllk and that was just never brought up again after third selection?? ig it might’ve seemed redundant but in my dreams tabieita have reunited and are eating it up together 👆🏻

YAYY can’t wait!! i’m so excited for the ln chapters and the new epinagi chapter so i will be ready to yap once they’re out 🫡

[kim-seung-mo]

Lonesome Nights (Part Two)

Lee Minho x fem!Reader, slight Hwang Hyunjin x fem!Reader

♩fluff to ANGST to fluff again, eventual smut (not in this part) arranged marriage au, non-idol au, romance, mentions of alcohol consumption and being drunk, minho gets a panic attack (near the end) a lot of miscommunication and mutual pining

♩♩ word count: 15k (save me)

♩♩♩ A/N: i promise the epilogue isn't gonna be 10k (but do i tho) also why does all of their development happen in this chapter? idk don't ask me this was supposed to be a one-shot

read part one here

(ik the last chapter was in past tense but this one is in present lol i was wayyy too far in when i realized)

Around ten o'clock, after brunch at home, you are ready to go out to get acquainted with your surroundings. Earlier during the meal, you received a message on your phone from Minho about the candidates for your bodyguard. You take a cursory look and choose the strongest-looking guy, "Seo Changbin". He has no problem with your choice and doesn't say anything to you other than "I'll let him know".

The weather is surprisingly good for where Minho lives, despite being a big city. It was sunny and comfortable, so you just threw on a jacket and went out. Within ten minutes of leaving the house, you see something interesting. The area is surrounded by all sorts of small shops, laundries, restaurants, and kiosks. But the one you notice in particular is a cafe in the corner with a sign that says "Insomnia".

Driven by curiosity, you push open the door of the cafe. The smell of freshly ground coffee beans hits you immediately. The interior is simple but cozy. The overall tone is brown and there is carefully selected greenery all around. The owner of this shop must love his shop. It must be a blessing to work here. With that in mind, you look towards the cashier. Instead, you see a man sleeping on the till. The name of the shop is "Insomnia" and the contrast of seeing someone sleeping when you open the door makes you even more curious.

He's sitting at the till which means he must be working here. But it's ten o'clock, how is he already falling asleep? You quietly take two steps closer to him and reach out to poke him in the arm.

The man grunts then squints and lifts his head to stretch. Then he opens his drowsy eyes to look at you. "Ah, welcome... I didn't expect to have customers ...... I'm sorry, have you been waiting long?"

You blinked, feeling a little amused as you listened to him talk to himself. "No... I just came in. And... I'm not exactly a guest, I suppose. I'm here to apply for a job... is your boss here?"

He looks down at the little pin on his chest, then sets it up a bit to show you, with a somewhat proud expression on his face. The pin has the words "Owner: Bang Chan" written on it in a cute script. He's the owner... But that would explain why he dares to sleep at work ......

"Although it may be rude to ask... But why would you come here..? To find work? The average guest over here isn't very friendly..." He rubs the back of his neck, a little embarrassed. "Of course, I don't mean that as a rejection, I'm just a bit curious... Although I guess we don't have many customers to begin with......" The latter half of the sentence he says in a bit of a whisper, but you still catch it.

You smile and wave your hand, "I didn't really think much of it, I fell in love with the place the first second I saw it. Also, there are "unfriendly" customers everywhere, and I'm sure there will be friendly ones as well."

He seems quite satisfied with your answer and nods, hugging his chest. "Do you have a résumé? Though I don't really need that sort of thing... Hmmm ...... Forget it, that sounds like a pain in the ass. You seem like a pretty interesting person, so congratulations on being accepted! Er... What's your name?"

'Interesting person', you think in your head as you hold out your hand. "Y/N Y/L/N, just call me Y/N."

He cooperates by holding out his hand and flashing a nice smile. "Hi Y/N. You can just call me Chan too, or Chris, either way. Y/N do you live around here?"

You nod and point in the direction of Minho's house. "I live right over there, I just moved in yesterday. It's only a ten-minute walk up the road to here. And what about you, Chris? Do you live around here?"

Chan nods and points upwards. "I live just upstairs."

You gave a knowing gesture. A lot of people do make the upstairs of their shops their homes. Then to keep from falling into awkwardness, you continued, "So your main business is being a cafe owner? That seems like a pretty pleasant life..."

He shakes his head, then sighs. "I don't know. I make music, but it's not very popular... Not a lot of people listen to it ...... I honestly don't know what my job is."

You cock your head curiously. Making music is already a tiring thing to do, and he actually has to manage a cafe while juggling a music career? That's quite an impressive thing to do. But why would he want to do that?

"So why did you open the cafe?"

He looks down and purses his lips, then laughs out loud. That response was something you didn't expect.

"It has to do with your job."

You blinked, your job? Isn't your job to greet customers and take their orders and such? How does that have anything to do with him opening a coffee shop?

"Your job, apart from the simple cashier's job, is a lot more important. That is! dun dun dun-" he gave himself a drumbeat, making a mystery of it. "Being responsible for stopping me from falling asleep during the day!"

"What?" You don't quite understand.

"Uh..." He looks a little awkward when he sees that you're not responding very well. "The story behind the cafe is basically that... I used to stay awake by drinking coffee because I always needed to stay up late writing songs. And then as I drank it I thought, I'm wasting so much money on coffee every day, I might as well open my own coffee shop. So... Ta-da~" he unfolds his hands as if he's showing you his "work". "But if you don't sleep at night, you'll be very sleepy in the morning... So here's where you, Y/N, come in! As soon as I fall asleep, you wake me up like you just did. How about that, easy job isn't it?"

The reason... It sounds weird, but there's no logical hole to be found. It's almost exactly like Minho asking you to help him sleep. The fact that he's opening a cafe in such a wealthy area proves that he's probably rich himself. How else could he have decided to open a shop on a whim? But that kind of thing is kind of personal, so it's better not to ask.

But having said that... So your day job is to stop Chan from sleeping and your night job is to help Minho sleep? Why does your job all have to do with sleeping? It's pretty weird when you think about it......

"Y/N? Hello? You still there?" "Ah, sorry, I was just thinking about something..."

You realize that you hadn't been responding to and scratch your hair a little awkwardly. "In charge of stopping you from sleeping, right? Leave it to me."

He narrows his eyes and smiles at your answer, ending the conversation.

After that, the two of you began the daily routine of running the cafe. First, he asked you to mop the floor, which didn't take long, then he instructed you to water the flowers, and after those two things, you were basically done. There's music playing in the background, and when you ask, he tells you it's an album he made especially for the café. And as the day went on, you realize that he wasn't lying when he said he had "basically no customers". All-day long, no one but you had set foot in the cafe. Now you're even more convinced that Chan is definitely a rich guy. Either he's a rich man or he's lying when he says his music is "not listened to". After all, the songs he wrote for the cafe were really good. And he definitely wasn't lying when he said he falls asleep a lot, either dozing off while sitting by the window looking at the view or leaning against the coffee machine. It was not the reception or the cleaning that bothered you the most throughout the day, it was trying to stop him from sleeping.

You ask him, "Why do you have to write music at night? If you write music in the morning, you can sleep normally at night." And he answers, "It's only at night that I get inspired". You don't know anything about writing music, so maybe that's true. Hyunjin dances in his spare time, and he did once said to you that "dancing at night feels different" or something along those lines.

Around 5pm, you said goodbye to Chan and left Insomnia to go back to Minho's house. On the way home, you take out your phone and look at it. Apart from the last text you got from Minho in the morning, there was only one other text from a stranger.

Unknown: "Hello, this is Seo Changbin."

You: "Hello."

You reply casually, but the next thing you know, the message is "read".

Seo Changbin: "Do you have a schedule?"

You were silent for a moment. Is he asking for your schedule for the whole day?

You: "I'll be working at Insomnia cafe near my home from 10:30am till around 5pm."

Seo Changbin: "Insomnia, is that the one owned by Bang Chan?"

You: "You know him?"

Seo Changbin: "We went to high school together."

It's a small world.

You: "What a coincidence."

Seo Changbin: "Coincidence indeed."

Seo Changbin: "Oh right."

Seo Changbin: "Boss is a bit busy today, but he asked me to check on your mood and how your job hunt is going."

Seo Changbin: "How would you like me to respond?"

If he wants to know, why not ask you himself when he gets back?

You: "Just tell him the truth. Say it went well and that I've found a job I'm happy with."

Seo Changbin: "And your mood?"

You: "Why does he need to know my mood?"

Seo Changbin: "Because he cares."

You: "......"

You: "Pretty good."

Seo Changbin: "Understood."

Seo Changbin: "I'll be waiting for you at the front door tomorrow morning at 10:30am then."

You: "Thank you."

Looking up to see that you are already at your doorstep, you turn off your phone and enter your fingerprint on the lock screen before walking in.

By the time Minho got back, it was around midnight. He said he would be back around ten, and at eleven you wondered if you should send him a text message to ask him if anything had happened, but then you thought it was nothing to worry about. However, when there was a movement at the front door, you couldn't help but glance over.

Minho pushes the door open and walks in, picks up the shoe puller and uses it to remove his shoes, then bends down to put them in the shoe cupboard. Noticing a glance at him, he looks up and sees you looking over. The corner of his mouth lifts upwards as he spots your gaze.

"Is this you waiting for me to come home?" He pulled his slippers out of the shoe cupboard again and stepped into them before straightening up and walking in your direction. "I'm sorry, I suddenly had to have an emergency meeting and ran a little late. Why did you wait for me? You could have gone to bed first if you were sleepy, couldn't you?"

You shrug. "Sooner or later, I'll have to get used to living in the same house as you, and besides, I wanted to try and get used to trying to put you to bed when I'm awake."

He grinned, seemingly in a good mood. "I heard Changbin say that you've got a job? At Insomnia Cafe?" He says as he walks in the direction of the stairs. Seeing that he was going upstairs, you grabbed the remote and turned the TV off, stepping into your own slippers and getting up with him. "How was it? Tough first day at work?"

You should be the one to ask him that. He's the CEO of the company, you're just working part-time in a café.

"Not at all. The owner is very nice and there are no customers at all. I'm basically on a free salary."

"That's great, I know the owner of Insomnia. His dad is my partner."

As expected, Chan and his family are also very rich.

With that said the two of you had reached the door of your room. Entering the room, Minho took off his suit jacket and threw it in the dirty clothes bin, then turned towards the bathroom room. Probably to wash up. You were all done and changed into your pajamas, so you went straight to the bed and sat down.

"I heard that Chan and Changbin went to high school together?" You asked when Minho had finished washing up and changed into his sleepwear as he came out of the bathroom.

"Not only Chan and Changbin, but Jisung too. The three of them were in a band together back in high school." He walked over to his half of the bed and sat down as well. "Small world isn't it? They thought they'd never see each other again after high school. Turns out two of them happen to both work for me. The other one happens to run a cafe near my house."

He lies down and looks at you with his head on his side. Seeing that he was ready to go to sleep, you lay down too, looking at him a little awkwardly, not knowing what to do next.

"Want to... hold hands?" You asked lightly, causing him to narrow his eyes and smile.

"Yeah, now that you mention it." He offered his hand, looking at you somewhat flirtatiously.

That look again... But this time it was you who said it first. So although a little reluctantly, you put your own hand out as well. Expecting him to just hold it, you were surprised when he interlocked his fingers with yours straight away. You instantly felt your heart beat a little faster. Luckily you weren't too close together for him to hear your heartbeat.

"I... Do I need to do anything else? Should I turn off the lights?"

He shook his head, still staring at you. "Leave them on, I want to see you... Good night Y/N."

He wants to look at you, but you don't want to look at him...... With that thought, you turn your head away a little sheepishly. After doing this, you expected him to ask you to turn around, but he didn't say anything even after goodnight.

Your heart was still beating a little fast and you couldn't fall asleep for a long time even after you closed your eyes. But the guy behind you didn't seem to move at all. Curiously, you turn your head to look at him. You find that he has long since fallen asleep. Breathing steadily and with his brows spread, he seemed as relaxed as could be.

That was easy, so easy that you can't quite believe it. He had actually fallen asleep just like that.

Seeing that he has fallen asleep, you begin to look at his face. Minho, when not frowning or having nightmares, when not having those teasing eyes staring at you, when just sleeping peacefully, is a beautiful man, you must say. After staring at him for a while, you feel a little sleepy and reach for the lamp beside the bed with your free hand, flicking the switch and plunging the room into darkness. Soon after, you too fall into a deep sleep.

The next two weeks were like the second day. In the morning you wake up in bed with Minho. After breakfast, you see him off to work. He asks you for a parting kiss each time and you nudge him out each time. At 10.30, Changbin appears at the door on time to escort you to Insomnia, you expect him to stay quietly behind you, but instead, he is really talkative and chats with you all the way to Insomnia. Once you get to Insomnia, he talks to Chan for a long time before he reluctantly leaves. The number of people who have visited the cafe in the past two weeks is minimal, but Chan doesn't seem to be too concerned about it. After all, he seems to run the cafe more for himself than anything else. At five o'clock in the afternoon, Changbin shows up at the door again to pick you up and take you home. You have dinner on your own at home, clean up a few things, and then lie on the sofa watching TV for a while until Minho comes home. He would always come home around midnight, and as soon as he gets home, he would take your hand and ask to go to bed, saying good night to you and falling asleep immediately. There was never a day when he remained awake for more than three minutes. The next day it's the same thing over and over again.

It sounds a bit boring, but you find it very relaxing. The only thing you're a little concerned about is......Hyunjin. It's been a month since he last saw you. He hasn't contacted you since then. Your mutual friends haven't mentioned anything about him to you either. Is he really going to just never speak to you again? Maybe that is for the best.

You thought you'd never hear from Hyunjin again. But you were wrong.

Today was different from other days. Minho said he had nothing to do in the afternoon so he could come back earlier and even have dinner with you. You've been a bit bored having dinner alone for the past two weeks. So when you got the news, you were excited to cook a big dinner for him to enjoy with you. But just as the two of you were seated, your phone rang at an inopportune time.

Thinking it was some kind of spam call, you were going to ignore it. But when you saw the caller's name, you froze.

"Hwang Hyunjin". After a month plus, he's calling you.

You were sitting across from Minho, chopsticks in your hand as you were about to eat your food when your pupils dilated at the sight of that name. Minho looked at you too, at the phone in your hand. You feel a little nervous as he looks at you, and with a slip of the hand, you press the hang-up button. But just when you thought that was the end of it, he called again. You bit your lower lip, your eyes dropping.

Hearing his voice now wouldn't be the smartest choice. You were trying to forget him, or at least forget your love for him. This was the crucial point in time, you couldn't just throw your work away. With that in mind, you hang up again.

But within seconds, it rings once more.

"Answer it, in case it's urgent." Minho, perhaps unable to watch you struggle any longer, takes the initiative and speaks up.

You're still hesitant, but on second thought, it makes sense: Hyunjin is calling you after such a long time and continues to do so even after you've hung up twice. Maybe there was something he really wanted to talk to you about? With that in mind, you picked up the phone.

"Y/N..." came that voice you knew so well from the other side, making your heart stop.

It was just one word, just calling your name, and you could already hear it. He must have been crying. His voice is muffled and even shows signs of trembling a little. Such a voice, the last time you heard it was on the night you said goodbye to him. You were drawn back to it in an instant. You immediately pursed your lips and frowned.

"......" You sucked in a breath, but couldn't get any of the words out, simply continuing to listen to the snuffling on the other end of the line. Was he crying right now? You could picture him so clearly. Curled up in a ball on his bed, like he does every time he's sad, arms wrapped around his knees, his hair must be a mess too. His hair had grown a little too long a month ago, you wondered what it looked like now.

"Y/N...say something......I want, I want to hear......your voice. I want to hear it. Please... I miss you so much, I want your voice......" Hearing no sound from your side, Hyunjin says with urgency. It was the broken words that made you realize something else. Not only was he crying, he was also drunk.

You look up again in Minho's direction, only to see him looking at you with a somewhat worried expression. He seems to be waiting for a reply from you too. The room is quiet and you're sitting close together, so he probably heard what Hyunjin just said as well.

You swallow, and after a few moments of thought, you speak softly. "Hyunjin...you're drunk."

He sounds relieved at the sound of your voice. Only that breath of his is still shaky. "I am drunk..... But you're not there to take care of me. Drunk ...... But I still miss you so much...... Y/N..." he sounded as if he was about to break as he called your name, your heart tightened and you closed your eyes. "...Are you doing well? Better than I am, I suppose?"

"Where are you now? Is there anyone around? You're not in a bar, are you?" Squashing the feelings in your heart, you first need to know if he's safe. Every time he's out drunk, he tends to wander around and do things he'll regret the next day. It was something you knew a lot about, so you first had to make sure he was at home and not outside.

"I haven't been out of the house in a month... don't worry...... I'm... not in that mood at all."

Granted, you get an answer, but that answer doesn't put your mind at ease much. Although Hyunjin was an emotional, tearful person, he was also a very joyful person at the same time. He always makes you feel better when he smiles, like a sun that can gently warm you up. But... Every time you think of him losing his smile because of you, you feel a pang of sadness. What makes you even sadder than that is that you know there is nothing you can do about it. You've lost your sun.

"I'm sorry... But, Hyunjin...... I have to hang up now. I... I'll send Seungmin a message to take care of you. Don't drink anymore...... I... I don't want you to ruin yourself."

Having said that, you hang up the phone straight away without even waiting for his reply. If you say any more, you might start crying too. You didn't want to cry, at least not here. Not in front of Minho.

Speaking of Minho, he's been looking at you since the beginning. The sadness in his eyes looked like it was going to spill out. But there seemed to be some other feelings besides that. Only he hid it deeper and didn't let you see it.

You hold the phone tightly in your hand and exhale a breath. Your mood was as low as it could get.

Tonight was supposed to be fun, supposed to be special. As a result of this phone call, not only have you lost your appetite, but Minho's mood has probably been ruined too. You stare blankly at the meal that is gradually getting cold in front of you and feel your eyes get red.

"I'm sorry..." You murmured, not sure who you were addressing. Maybe it's an apology for hanging up on Hyunjin, or maybe it's an apology for ruining the dinner. You don't know anymore.

Pushing back your chair and standing up, you struggle to withdraw a fake smile. "Minho... take your time eating. I'll... I'll go upstairs."

He opens his mouth to say something, but after seeing your difficult smile, the words get stifled. In the end, he just pursed his lips, lowered his head, and didn't say anything. He didn't stop you from leaving.

You went upstairs alone to the master bedroom's bathroom. After sprinkling some water on your face, you hold the edge of the sink and sigh. You took out your phone and clicked on Kim Seungmin's chat page, telling him in simple words about Hyunjin's current state and how to take care of him when he was drunk; Seungmin had been a mutual friend of the two of you for several years and you were sure that he would be able to help you take care of Hyunjin.

Hyunjin...Hyunjin who you have hurt and is suffering in silence ...... You slowly slide down to the ground, feeling the tears that were in your eyes about to burst out. The boy who did nothing wrong, but just fell in love with you to suffer such pain ...... You want him to be strong, you want him to forget about you. But you are also human, you are selfish, and you still have feelings for him too. Somewhere deep inside, you too wish it had never happened, wish it was all just a dream. You also wish that you could love him for the rest of your life without any hindrance.

You hate yourself for this. Hate the way that it seems that every choice you make seems to be the wrong one. Why does making a choice mean hurting someone else? Why can't there be a seemingly perfect ending? But who else can you hate but yourself?

Tears slide down your face, and you cover your face, crying silently.

Until...

"Y/N...can I come in?"

Minho's voice came from outside the door. His voice was soft, so soft that you thought at first that it was your own illusion. You, who used to be very sensitive to sound, hadn't even heard the sound of the footsteps. Perhaps it was muffled by the sound of your own sobbing? You sniffled a little and wiped the tears from the corners of your eyes with the back of your hand. But you knew very well that you had definitely been heard by him long before now, having cried so loudly. Even if he hadn't, he would definitely notice after seeing your weepy face.

"I look awful right now..." You replied, trying to steady your breath. "You don't want to see me."

He chuckled at your somewhat pale words. "I don't believe that. Come on, get up, the ground is cold. Let's talk outside, shall we?"

How did he know you were on the floor? Could it be that he saw your shadow? Or judging from the direction of the sound? Anyway, you didn't resist any more and slowly stood up propping your hand on the floor, grabbed the door handle and pushed open the bathroom door.

Minho was standing right in front of you, but you didn't want to look up at him for fear he would see your red eyes and nose. He seems relieved to see that you're okay, reaching out to help you pull your hair back from your forehead behind your ears. "You've been crying for about half an hour. I've cleaned up the kitchen already."

Hearing him do the job you said you were going to do, you looked up at him a little apologetically. Realizing what you've done and trying to hurry down again, you were too late. He holds your face so that you can't do anything but look at him. Your pupils tremble slightly and you subconsciously try to dodge, but his strength is unexpectedly strong, you can't even try to avoid it.

"It's obvious that there's something on your mind that you're not telling me. But I said I wouldn't get into your personal business, so this is just asking. Would you like to tell me what's on your mind? My therapist told me that it's important to share what's on your mind so it doesn't keep building up."

Even though it was a "question", both the words he said afterwards and the movement of his hands told you that you didn't seem to have any other choice. And... Sharing this with him might actually ease your mind. So you closed your eyes and attached your hands to his, taking them off of you before opening your eyes again, bowing your head slightly and taking a step towards your side of the bed.

You sat down, moving back a bit before gesturing for him to sit over as well. Seeing how you seemed ready to show your feelings, he immediately came over to you and sat down next to you.

"I just think it's... It's just unfair." You spoke slowly. "I'm the one who said goodbye without warning, I'm the one who made him upset like that. He didn't do anything wrong, so why is he the one who has to suffer? Why am I the bad guy and he's the one being punished? Why should I be able to live in such comfort after leaving him, while he...he sounds like he's dying? Who am I to live here in such comfort every day? Who am I to deserve it? Even though... Even though I know, even though I keep making excuses to myself that it's best for him to leave him, to never have contact with him again ...... But that phone call just now... He really isn't doing well at all. I'm such a jerk... Hurting him like this ...... I hate myself so much for doing this......"

Minho listened quietly as you broke into your words, looking at the side of your face, his brow furrowed from the moment you opened your mouth. He took a deep breath after you finished that last sentence, holding back something. After a long moment, seeing that you seemed to have finished, he spoke. "Can I hug you?"

He turns to his side and opens his arms slightly. You look at him with some shock, not expecting him to suddenly make such a move. Such a move that deepens your disgust with yourself. You want to refuse, but you couldn't open your mouth. You needed the hug, you just didn't think you deserved it. Instead, he took your silence as acquiescence and took you into his arms.

His embrace is warm, so warm that you feel as if the tears you've just retrieved are being forced out again. You weren't much of a fan of physical contact, and even Hyunjin hadn't hugged you many times. After all, you didn't grow up as a child in a family that liked physical contact. But in Minho's embrace, you seemed to feel safe. It seemed that if you were in this person's arms, you would be able to be a little bit more at peace.

But it's still the same thing. You don't deserve it. Why is it that you have Minho's warm embrace and Hyunjin is left alone in a cold bed, weeping in silence? Why?

"You seem to forget, Y/N. The sacrifices you've made are no less than his. The burden you carry on your back. The fate of thousands and thousands of people. Your parents' company. You gave up your life for this... Giving up the person you love...... Returning alone to a place that doesn't give you happy memories... Marrying a stranger that you don't even love......" For some reason, there was a tone of bitterness in his voice as he said those words. "Don't you... Don't you feel that you too deserve to be happy? Don't you feel that you deserve what you have now? Whether it's happiness or hurt, you got it all with your own hands. So don't feel that you don't deserve anything, because you do."

You can't see his face, but you feel like he's smiling.

"Y/N, I understand exactly how you feel. Feeling like you don't deserve anything because of hurting a loved one. For doing things that lead to undesirable consequences. The feeling of regret, the feeling of questioning yourself, the feeling of pain. I know all of these and have experienced them all, so I can understand how you feel. You are lucky to have someone to tell you these things at an early stage. I was also lucky that no one came to tell me these words, but because of that I found this answer on my own. And, because of that, I am able to save you with these words, aren't I?"

Your grip on the fabric of his back tightens a little. Your lips quivered as you breathed. He felt your light tremor and ran his hand down your back, one after another, with a tenderness you hadn't felt before, from him. How much pain was it, how long did it take for him to learn by himself how not to blame himself? And was he really not blaming himself anymore? His next words give you the answer.

"I say I'm saving you, but I'm not really fully healed myself. After all, that's why you're here, isn't it? I need your rescue too. I need you to help me heal my wounds. Y/N, wounds do heal, though they leave unsightly scars, though they sometimes reopen and remind you how much it hurts when you see that scar, but still they heal. How long it will take I don't know. Maybe five years, ten years, twenty years, maybe a lifetime, but no matter how long it takes, it is slowly healing. So... Promise me you'll try to slowly accept this imperfect version of yourself with me, okay?"

How long did you cry in his arms again? Did you wet his shirt lapels? You don't remember. You just thought that when it was over, when you were lying back in bed again ready to sleep, you saw a different side of him. Not the CEO of the Lee Corporation, but Lee Minho, just Lee Minho.

For the first time, you took the initiative and held his hand tightly, pulling it over and embracing it in your arms. For the first time, instead of turning your back to him, you lay face to face with him on your side on the bed. For the first time, you smiled and said 'goodnight' to him.

It seemed that after that incident, the relationship between the two of you changed quite a bit. It went from being a purely collaborative partnership to being like close friends. At least that's what you've been fooling yourself into thinking. That night when you interlocked your fingers with him and looked at his sleeping figure to say goodnight, you saw something else for a moment. You suddenly realized, felt with certainty, that you would be doing this every night afterwards, sharing a bed with someone like this. And after this realization, you felt as if the way you looked at him had changed.

Whenever you looked at him before, you were watching his expressions, or just looking into his eyes out of politeness when you were talking to him. But after that night, you couldn't help but look at his face and just stare, like you were admiring him. He seemed to notice such a gaze too, smiling every time he caught you staring at him, eyes narrowed like a kitten. Yes, that's right, Lee Minho is like a kitten.

Not only did he look like one, he acted like one too. On weekends when he doesn't need to work, he lies on the couch in his pajamas and asks you to let him cuddle up on your lap and use it like a pillow. He stretches like a kitten every time he wakes up, rubs his eyes with the back of his hand and sometimes falls on his side on top of you. He also keeps annoying you when he wakes up before you do, poking you in the face and shaking your arm, asking you to make him breakfast. Though he has said before that your cooking is not as good as his. But he does cook for you sometimes, and you have to say that his cooking is really good, and you eat a lot of it every time, and then regret it afterwards, saying that you have lost weight for nothing. Whenever you mentioned the diet, he would frown and shake his head, saying things like "I don't understand you women".

You seem to have gotten used to each other's presence in just two months, learning every little habit and detail about each other. For example, when he came out of the bathroom in his bathrobe, you saw a scar on his chest. He said it was from an operation he had when he was a child, and as his body grew, the scar grew longer and longer, which bothered him. You also showed him the marks you had left after your injuries as a child. At the time, you put up with the pain and didn't tell anyone because you didn't want your parents to know. Fortunately, the wounds were not very visible, otherwise your mother, who cared only about your appearance, would have been furious.

Apart from the wounds, you discover a few other things in common between you and Minho. One of the most surprising things is that you went to the same elementary school. He was only two years older than you, and you had supposedly gone to school together for four years. It's just that at the time you were so preoccupied with rules and your parents' words that you didn't care about anything other than your studies. And he said he was the troublemaker in his class when he was a kid, the type who never went a day without getting into some kind of trouble. But because his family was so rich and powerful, no teacher dared to scold him, and even the headmaster had to be careful when he met him. You couldn't help but laugh at this story because of the way he described how the headmaster and teachers treated him was just like that of your father. He also told you that if you were in the same class, he would have bullied you. You didn't comment much on this, which was a way of admitting that he was right. After all, you were a real coward as a child, the kind who didn't even dare to say "no".

Back when your family was at its most wealthy and powerful, your father didn't treat you the way he treats Minho now. He never gave you any fatherly love and all he did was work and find women outside. Your mother was afraid to take it out on your father, so she liked to take it out on you. The person who loved you most in the last ten plus years was probably Hyunjin. That's why he's so special to you.

When you mentioned your parents, Minho's expression was always a bit strange, unexplainably strange. Come to think of it, even though your parents never loved you, at least they were both alive. In contrast, Minho always wears a smile when he mentions his parents, but there is something sad about that smile. You could hear in his stories that his parents loved him and cared for him. And there is always a hint of regret in his tone, a hint of missing, but more ...... seemed to be remorse. You later realized that the topic of parents didn't seem to make either of you happy, so you stopped talking about them after a few times.

After another week or so had passed, it was Friday.

Even on a Friday afternoon, when everyone was off work, Insomnia Café was still empty. It was just music written by Chan playing in the background, while he himself was sitting in a daze at the table closest to the door looking out of the window at the various people passing by. You had finished your work for the day a few hours earlier and were sitting across from Chan with your phone and a cup of coffee, brushing up on the latest news.

"It's going to be rainy season soon...... And that means no more customers...... What am I gonna do Y/N? I'm going out of business......"

You put your coffee mug down on the table and looked up. "Are you under the illusion that there are customers if it's not rainy season? I've been working here part-time for what, two months now? I can count on one hand the number of customers that have come in, including me." That sounds like an exaggeration, but it's really not. By your count, of the few people who come in, more than half come to see Chan, not for coffee. So there were actually probably fewer than ten real customers. "I originally said I wanted to work part-time because I didn't want to have nothing to do during the day, but it turns out I still have nothing to do even when I get a job."

Chan grunted in displeasure at that comment, propping his elbows on the table and his palms on his cheeks. "Isn't being in charge of keeping me from falling asleep a job? It's a great job, don't you dare underestimate it."

As he finishes this sentence, your phone suddenly rings. You look down and see that it's actually a text message from Minho. He said this morning that he had a full day of meetings today and a party to go to in the evening, telling you not to wait for him for dinner. How come he's texting you now?

You tap on the messaging app.

Minho: "The dinner is cancelled, so I'm on my way to pick you up."

It's cancelled? Wasn't it a really important party? But you don't really want to ask either.

You: "Pick me up? Do I need to tell Changbin not to come?"

Minho: "I've already informed him."

So he's sending me this text message purely to notify me.

You: "Okay... Where are you?"

Minho: "Look out the window."

Seeing that, you jerk your head up and look out the window, startling Chan across the table as well.

"My God what's wrong? Is there a customer?" "No..."

Something like 'It's my fiancé picking me up from work' seemed a bit strange to suddenly say to him. So you just didn't say anything.

"No? Then this guy is... Eh? Minho?"

Minho is sitting in the back seat of a black fancy car at the moment, looking in your direction and smiling a little when he sees you staring at him. Jisung in front of him gets up from the driver's seat, opens the door and walks to the back and opens the backseat door. Minho thanks him and gets out of the car to walk towards you.

"What's Minho doing here looking for me? Is there something going on?" Chan asked somewhat curiously as his eyes followed his movements and watched him coming in.

You put your phone away and prepared to get up. "He's here for me."

Chan frowned, seemingly not expecting you to have anything to do with Minho. But it made sense, after all, you hadn't told him anything. There wasn't much need to tell him is all.

"You know each other?"

He says this just as Minho pushes the door in and hears the question as well. He looked at you and then at Chan, who was off to the side. "Us?"

You smiled a little awkwardly and then waved your hand. It was too much trouble to explain this whole thing.

You thought Minho would see your hand wave and understand you, make up some other excuse, or just take you away after a few words. But he doesn't. He looks straight at you, with a look in his eyes you can't quite read, and Chan looks back and forth between the two of you, an awkward chuckle escaping his lips.

"Yeah, yeah... Do you guys know each other? I've never heard either of you mention it...... Speaking of which, doesn't Minho live around here? Are you guys neighbours?"

Minho raised an eyebrow. "You didn't tell him?"

You froze for a moment, shaking your head as you realized he was talking to you. His eyes fell on your hand. Yours followed his to his own hand. You realized then that you weren't wearing the engagement ring he had given you. While looking at his hand, the ring was lying quietly on the middle finger of his left hand, the huge diamond shining brightly.

"Tell me what? Why don't I seem to understand?"

Jisung pushed his way into the cafe at that moment as well. Seeing the somewhat awkward atmosphere between the three of you, it was momentarily difficult to know whether to speak or not. "Uh.... boss, what's the problem? Is there a change of plans? Do you need me to take Miss Y/N home first?"

Chan frowned. "Miss Y/N? You guys know each other too?"

Jisung looks at Minho and then at you suspiciously, his eyes hovering back and forth between the two of you. "Doesn't Changbin come to take her home every day...?"

Chan seems to have just now realized it, with the look that the whole world has cleared up. "Wait, Changbin is a bodyguard for Minho's family's company, and he comes to pick Y/N up from work every day now... That means you guys......" He points his finger between you guys. "Are siblings?"

Jisung facepalms speechlessly, and even you can barely hold back your laughter, leaving Minho's questioning look behind. Speaking of Minho, he's still staring at your hand with a bit of annoyance, as if he didn't even hear what Chan just said.

"Are you stupid? They're a couple! A pair of lovers who've been living together and are already engaged!"

That seemed like the first time anyone had spoken out about your relationship. Or at least the first time you'd heard it.

Chan's whole body froze, but his eyes started to glow. "You guys? You and Lee Minho? You two are getting married? How come I haven't even heard that Minho's found a woman? How long have you been dating?" His sleepiness seemed to disappear and completely erased the way he couldn't keep his eyes open earlier. Propping himself up on the table with both hands, he stands up and moves closer to you, staring intently into your eyes as he waits for a reply. Surely gossip can wake someone up. You've never seen Chan like this before, not even when Changbin came to talk to him. Not even before when he said he'd finished writing a new album was he this excited.

"Uh... It's not really-" "It's only been a few months. I knew it had to be Y/N from the first moment I saw her."

Minho interrupts before you can finish, watching as Chan's face is almost pressed against yours, taking you by the wrist and pulling you towards him. Chan seems to realize he's a bit close to you too, and takes two quick steps back to scratch the back of his head in embarrassment.

"Love at first sight, that's cool." After a couple of dry coughs, Chan looks up at you again and says. "Y/N, even though it might not seem like it, Minho is actually a very nice man. I'm sure you won't be treated wrong."

You smiled a little awkwardly and nodded, not really sure how to reply to his words while you cast a look at Minho. But he seems to already have the intention of speaking up, narrowing his eyes at Chan.

"Thank you for the compliment, and I'll be sure to send you an invitation when the time comes for us to get married. But right now we have a bit of business to attend to and we should get going, shouldn't we Y/N?"

You should not resist when he talks with his eyes narrowed. That's a bit of a conclusion you've drawn over the last few months. He squints his eyes up when he's annoyed or angry and pulls this smile around his mouth. What is he angry about though? You look down at your hands. Could it really be because you don't have the ring he gave you? But......

In any case, it's best to cope with him for now. "Yeah, yeah... We've got a bit of work to do, so we've got to hurry home first. See you on Monday Chris, and don't stay up late on the weekend, take some melatonin and go to bed early."

You ended your sentence in a hurry and were dragged out of Insomnia by Minho.

Jisung saw the two of you in a bit of a hurry and didn't have time to talk to Chan, whom he hadn't seen for a while, before he too returned to the front seat. Sitting down and holding the steering wheel, he looked at the two of you in the rear-view mirror in some confusion.

"Home." Minho ordered. Jisung then nodded, stepped on the gas and started to drive home.

Minho didn't say a word the whole way. Maybe it was because Jisung was there, or maybe it was because he was still angry. You fiddled with your fingers a little uneasily, glancing at him every now and then, and tentatively clearing your throat. But he didn't even react, just stared blankly out of the window. You don't know if it was just you, but you felt he was a bit sour.

Minho doesn't move, waiting for Jisung to open the door for him, who gets out of the car, goes around to the back seat, opens the door and invites Minho out. He then offers you his hand to help you out of the car as well. You glance at Minho's briefcase on your left and after a moment's reflection you decide to help him take it down with you. You take Jisung's hand in yours and let him pull you out of the car. He lets go only when you are firmly on your feet.

"So, Boss, miss, any more orders?"

Minho waved his hand with his back to him and walked past like this doorway without saying a word. You look at his back, then turn to face Jisung with a slight bow. "Thank you, Jisung... I don't know what's wrong with Minho... Is it normal for him to be like this? Did something happen at the office or..."

Jisung shook his head in return. "Boss was so happy when he found out the party was cancelled that he immediately contacted me to bring him back. He also seemed more relaxed on the way, and was smiling when he texted you, Miss. I don't know what's going on here either.... I don't know what's suddenly happened... Boss used to be moody, but that was due to lack of sleep. Now that you've solved that problem, this shouldn't be happening......."

Minho had by now opened the door to the house and walked in, turning back to see you and Jisung whispering and slamming the door shut with a somewhat angry frown.

"I have a bit of a clue, but it's not 100% clear......" You rubbed your middle finger of your left hand. "If that's really what happened... He's being a little childish, isn't he?" Childish. You hadn't thought that word had anything remotely to do with Lee Minho. But if he's really just mad at you for not wearing the ridiculously large diamond ring he gave you, then that does seem childish. "Anyway, you go ahead, I'll sort this out."

Jisung nodded hastily. "Then I'm counting on you, Miss."

You sighed and headed in the direction of the house as well.

Minho is sitting in the living room, over on the couch where you always stay, head down, arms crossed, sitting quietly. You'd expect him to give you a scowl or a teasing look like he always does. But he's not in the same mood, just sitting there with a frown on his face. He didn't even hear you enter the room.

You walked over in his direction and sat down next to him.

"I'm sorry..." Before you could speak, he opened his mouth first. "I forgot."

While you were puzzled by the "I forgot" answer, you were perhaps more surprised that he had apologised so quickly. You haven't even said anything. You haven't even figured out what he's angry about yet.

"What?"

He turned in your direction, first looking at your hand again, then slowly looking up straight into your eyes. "I forgot that we're fake." He purses his lips after saying this and lifts his leg to leave, but you take his wrist and look up at him.

"What "fake"? Don't leave in the middle of a sentence, it's impolite."

His hand clenches into a fist, but he doesn't break away from you. "I'm in a bit of a mess and I'd like to be left alone... I just wanted to apologize to you first for earlier. I don't know what's wrong with me." He rubs his other hand over his forehead and takes a deep breath. "Maybe I'm just making a fool of myself."

Leaving those words behind, he takes the briefcase you're holding that belongs to him, whispers a thank you and heads upstairs without looking back. His back looks a little lonely, which makes you feel stuffy inside. What did he mean by "making a fool of himself"? And the way he looked at your hand... There seems to be a connection between the two, but you need one last piece of information.

Seeing that he's not going to cook, you resign yourself to the kitchen and begin the usual dinner preparations.

Meanwhile, in the master bathroom, Minho rinces some water on his face and holds the edge of the sink to gaze at himself in the mirror, smiling a little to himself. He looked at the ring on the middle finger of his left hand and, with a grit of his teeth, gamely took it off, ready to throw it away, but then hesitated at the last moment. Then he held the tiny ring in his hand again, clutching it to his chest.

What was wrong with him? He had been so rude to Chan and you in the café, and he had gone into the house without thanking Jisung when he got out of the car... He would never have done something like that... What's wrong with him today? Was it just because you and Chan were getting a little close? Or is he mad at you for not telling Chan about your relationship? But why would he be angry? Other than the title of 'fiancé', he's just friends with you. Besides, the man you love is......

Are you not wearing the ring because of that guy too? Or is it because you see the ring and you remember that you are practically imprisoned by him? Although he said he was giving you freedom, the fact that you had lost the life you were meant to live was his fault. He was selfish and forced you into this marriage.

He wasn't lying when he told you he was "in a bit of a mess". He feels like he's going crazy right now. He's angry, but he doesn't know who he's angry at. Is it himself? Is it you? Was he angry, or was he jealous? If it was jealousy, who was he to be? He didn't even have the right to be jealous.

He knows that he has developed strange feelings for you over this period of time, feelings that he has never felt in any previous relationship, feelings that are stronger than a simple fondness. He would normally call this feeling 'love', but he doesn't dare to think of it that way. He is more inclined to "possessiveness" and "dependence" at the moment. Even though he knows inside that there is more to it than that.

Unbeknownst to you, he has quietly experimented with you while you were asleep. He will pretend to be asleep after you have both gone to bed holding hands and then secretly let go of your hand to see if he can still fall asleep. The answer was "yes". As long as you were with him, he felt at ease. But he doesn't tell you about it. Only he knows the reason for this.But he doesn't want to face up to the reason, doesn't want to admit it.

He took a deep breath and tried to calm himself down. Today was supposed to be a day of relaxation, a day he had finally gotten where he didn't have to work late or go to meetings. A day where he could let go of everything outside of this home and just spend time with you to eat a meal, talk, maybe watch a movie and relax. But just because you're not wearing an engagement ring? Just because the way you and Chan looked when you sat together had him looking a little red in the eyes? He was going to ruin a good day because of that?

Speaking of which, since when did you stop wearing the ring? Before today, he hadn't noticed it closely enough. Maybe you never wore it at all. At least you didn't seem to wear it at home. But he thought that, at least when you were outside, you would want to tell people that you belonged to another person. At least he did. At work, at parties, he wore the ring in the most prominent place as if he was showing off that he already had a fiancée. But having said that, it's only natural that you don't want to be as obvious as he is. After all, you still had that person. The man who makes you wear a sad expression every time you think of him.

Do you look different when you think of him too? He knows he does. It's as if he can't help but relax when he thinks of you, leaving all his worries behind for a while.

This feeling was too foreign to him, something he had never experienced before. His heart really ached, his chest was stuffy without any way to vent it.It was a different feeling than when his parents passed away, and when he lost sleep and couldn't sleep. All of these things made him feel helpless, but there was something different. In the first two, he was truly helpless, and the feeling of despair was utter. Especially with the death of his parents, he knew there was no coming back from that 'loss'. The despair of insomnia was irritable, more like hating himself, frantic and cranky. But this feeling is different. It's slow, it doesn't just slam you and explode in an instant. It builds up slowly, like water dripping into a glass, filling up more and more, about to overflow but not quite. You are right in front of his eyes, just a stone's throw away. But you feel so far away that he can't seem to ever reach you. He wants to let it out but has no reason to, so he just lets the feelings torment him slowly. It makes him act perversely and unlike him.

"Lee Minho...you're going insane......"

When Minho comes down the stairs, you notice that the ring on his hand has disappeared. Seeing this you have complete confirmation and that last bit of information has been given. He's just upset because you're not wearing the ring, as he is now. You're a little surprised, after all, if it was before, you would never have thought he was like this. Someone who would be in a bad mood because you weren't wearing a ring. But there is a suspicion in your mind at the moment, a suspicion that you don't dare to think about deep down.

Perhaps because you never received any affirmation from your parents as a child, you are not a very confident person and can be suspicious of many things and not very sensitive to emotional matters. After all, the last time you had a crush on someone, you didn't confess it for four years and never told him your true feelings until you said goodbye to him. So now, even if Minho's feelings are exactly the same as "jealousy" you've seen online, in novels and on TV, you still don't really believe it. You still unconsciously try to find excuses to tell yourself otherwise. After all, he's Lee Minho and you're just Y/N.

Bringing dinner to the table, you take a slow seat across from him, not looking him in the eye the entire time.

If you look up now, you can see the forlorn expression on his face, his eyes still looking straight at you holding the chopsticks. He also felt ridiculous and childish. You don't even notice what he's thinking, it's all just him making a fool of himself.

"Dinner looks delicious." He said it in a very fake tone, even if it wasn't a false statement. His attention was not at all on the food. He didn't even pick up his chopsticks. "I was rude... Thank you for saying thank you to Jisung. I'll text him back later to apologise. And Chan."

You pressed your lips together. He sounded like the time when you had first met. Respectful, but not at all like the 'friend' he'd been two days before. It made you a little upset, but in the end you couldn't say anything other than "okay".

There was a silence between the two of you after that. You glanced up at him every now and then, trying to read something in his expression. But you were surprised to find that he seemed to have put his mask back on. Hiding everything from you. From the "we're not real" and "maybe I'm just being a fool" statements he made by the couch, to the way he's now putting on his mask of pretence makes you feel inexplicably sad. What has happened to make him suddenly behave like this? You don't think it's just because you're not wearing a ring that he's acting like this. He's not that kind of person.

So the only conclusion left really is......

"Minho...there's a reason I'm not wearing a ring." You tried to open your mouth to explain, but his pupils narrowed sharply and the movements in his hands and the chewing in his mouth gave a slight pause, clearly meaning that he didn't want you to continue.

"I know, you don't have to tell me. The ring was supposed to be merely a formality, that's what I said." The tone of his voice doesn't rise or fall a bit, but you still feel the sadness in his voice. "It's none of my business whether you wear it or not......right?"

He looks at you, his pupils devoid of any emotion. It was clearly a question, but it was as if he didn't want you to answer the question.

So you lowered your head and didn't say anything.

And so the dinner ended in silence.

After dinner, Minho helped you clean up the kitchen before heading upstairs alone. It is normal for him to spend a few hours in the office by himself when he comes back early. But today you were extra concerned about him. While watching TV on the couch, you kept unconsciously looking upstairs, unable to focus on what was on TV.

At about ten o'clock, you yawned, feeling a little sleepy, then turned off the TV, put the laundry in the dryer and went upstairs. The door to his office was still closed, he was still inside.

You don't really want to talk to him right now, but you can't let up when it comes to sleeping. So taking a deep breath, you knock on his office door.

"Minho, I'm going to bed, are you coming?"

After about ten seconds, his voice comes out from inside.

"You go ahead, I’m busy."

Your hand rested on his doorknob and after a few moments of silence you eventually chose to leave alone. If he doesn't want to see you, then let him be. If he wants to hold your hand or do anything after you've fallen asleep, that's his business, it's none of your concern. Not knowing what else to do, you turned around and went back into the master bedroom.

You asked him, he was the one who said he didn't need it.

Sleep wasn't much of an issue for you, even when you had something on your mind you were the type to fall asleep relatively easily. But today is not quite the same. After washing up, you changed into your pajamas and lay down on the bed in your bedroom, pulling your phone out. You clicked on the chat screen with Minho and scrolled through the chats earlier today, trying to forget his unusual behaviour. He hadn't asked Jisung or Changbin to deliver messages for him since about a month ago, and no matter how busy he was, he would at least tell you before you left work what he was doing tonight and whether he would be back for dinner. If he wasn't very busy, he would sometimes send you some photos he had taken at lunchtime. Mostly of Jisung standing up while asleep in his office. Sometimes he'll even take a selfie of himself. Although you always reply to him telling him to "get back to work", you can't help but smile every time you get a message from him.

But at the moment, you can't quite smile when you look at these cute chats.

You probably do like him. You are not a teenager, you are not that oblivious to feelings of fondness. You know that your feelings for Minho are not simply a partnership, or even just friends. But what about Hyunjin, if it's Minho you're attracted to?

You exit Minho's chat screen and click on Hyunjin's.

Hyunjinnie: "I'm sorry about last night... I was drunk."

You: "It's okay."

Hyunjinnie: "Did I say anything weird? If I did..."

You: "You didn't say anything."

You don't actually know if he even remembers what he said himself, but you don't want to talk about the subject anymore.

Hyunjinnie: "Oh... That's good."

Hyunjinnie: "Does he treat you well?"

You: "Very well."

Hyunjinnie: "If he treats you badly be sure to tell me and I'll beat him up for you."

You: "Don't worry about it, there's no need for that."

Hyunjinnie: "Oh..."

Hyunjinnie: "Can I come and see you?"

You: "It's better if we don't see each other."

Hyunjinnie: "Do you hate me that much?"

You: "Hyunjin...you know what I mean."

You: "I know this might be hard for you, but let's not see…or text each other anymore…"

You really sound like an emotionless jerk. But the more decisive you are, the better, and you continue to believe that.

Hyunjinnie: "So, you want us to be strangers?"

Hyunjinnie: "We can't even remain friends?"

You: "Until you really think of me as a friend... Yes."

Hyunjin didn't send you any more messages after that. The conversation between the two of you ended on that day. You have no idea how he's been since then, even Seungmin hasn't given you any more information about his situation.

Not communicating with him was working, or at least it was working for you. Maybe it's because the person who lives in your head now has switched? The first person you think of now, whether you are happy or sad, is Minho. you want to share happy things with him, and you know that his shoulder is there for you to lean on when you are feeling down. Whether this has anything to do with you cutting off contact with Hyunjin is not clear to you, but you have wondered why Minho is so different. Why did you, who grew up without any sense of security or belonging, accept him as quickly as you did, even to the point of crying in front of him and letting him see a side of you that no one had ever seen before?

Because he's really just like you. Like you, he is not used to being dependent on others and always carries everything on his own. You know what it's like to feel that way. He understands you that way too. That's why you two never get tired of being together. No one person always has to bear the pain of the other. It's just that, because you're both such self-reliant personalities, you both look like fools when it comes to emotional problems like this. Solving your current problems isn't really difficult at all, you just have to talk about it. Just say a few more words and let him talk again like he did the morning after you first moved here, or like he did the night Hyunjin called you. Pull out your heart and show it to him, say everything you want to say without worrying about him judging you. Tell him not just "why I'm not wearing the ring you gave me", tell him not to put on “the mask" when you're around him, tell him that you're not just in a contractual relationship... And also tell him...... that you love him.

You love him, you must love him. It's a stronger feeling than "like". He made you feel like you belonged, like you were understood for the first time in the world. Someone who is really willing to empathise with you and to help you. For the first time someone stood behind you, opened their arms and told you, "It's okay, you can rest, I'm here".

So this is how it feels to love someone.

But today isn’t the day to tell him that.

You close your eyes and fall asleep imagining the feeling of his warm embrace.

At around 2am, Minho returned from the office to his bedroom, rubbing his eyes. He pulls back the tie tied under his shirt collar and unbuttons a few buttons before going into the bathroom to wash up a little tiredly. When he comes out, he slowly walks over to your half of the bed and kneels down, holding onto the edge. He leaned on his arm and looked at you, watching your face as you slept peacefully, and the corners of his mouth involuntarily rose.

He wanted to do many things, to leave a soft kiss on your forehead, to stroke your hair, but fearing that such a movement would wake you up, he decided on second thoughts not to do so. He stands up and walks to his half of the bed and lies down. He turned his head sideways to look at your back and contemplated for a moment, as if he was torn between whether to take your hand or not.

He couldn't allow his feelings for you to get any deeper, it would only hurt him in the end. He knows this very well. So he shouldn't make any more moves that are out of line. You wouldn't want that for him either. All he should do is provide you with everything you need so that you can live comfortably in this house. The less of those excesses, the idea of trying to make him the only one in your eyes, the better.

With this in mind, Minho closes his eyes and tries to fall into sleep.

Ten minutes later, he opened his eyes. Frowned. Adjusted his posture and then closed his eyes again.

Twenty minutes later, he opened his eyes again.

Thirty minutes, forty minutes, fifty minutes, an hour.

He can't seem to fall asleep.

He reaches out and takes your wrist. Not interlocking fingers, just pulling on your wrist. Feeling your steady pulse, he takes a deep breath. 'It's okay, today is just a bad day.' He thinks this and tries again to fall asleep.

Another ten minutes pass and he still can't sleep. He was getting a little annoyed, but the movements of his hands were still gentle, slowly switching his grip on your wrist to interlocking his fingers with yours, feeling the warmth in his palm.

But it still doesn't work.

At 3.30am, Minho realizes a truth he doesn't want to face.

He seems to have lost sleep again.

Maybe it was because his mind was so messed up right now? Or maybe it's because you're not close enough. He moved in your direction, but there was no change in his mood, and his sleepiness didn't deepen. He was really panicking a bit now. How could he suddenly not be able to sleep now when there hadn't been any problems for months? He sat up slowly and pinched the bridge of his nose with his other hand. It was a feeling he had vowed never to feel again before. This feeling of insomnia, of not being able to sleep even though he was obviously tired, was really not pleasant at all. After having you, he had thought he would never experience such a feeling again.

He turned on his side and swallowed.

He had just convinced himself not to do anything beyond the pale, and already he was changing his mind less than an hour later.

He reached over and gently wrapped his arm around your waist, bringing you towards him, his chin resting on your shoulder from behind, his head lowered and he took a deep breath of your scent. Your body was warm and soft compared to his, and with a hug like this, it was like he had your whole body wrapped around him. A gesture like this was something he had never done to anyone before. But it seemed like he had done it a million times before, as if he knew what to do.

He closes his eyes tightly and concentrates on his breathing. Inhaling, exhaling, letting his heartbeat try to settle down.

A sense of reassurance, a sense of peace of mind. What he needed now was a sense of ease. As long as you were there, he could feel at ease. That's the way it should be, isn't it? Just knowing that he has you by his side, knowing that you are his ......

You are his. You're not his. But you are not his at all. You're not. You're not in love with him.

Minho clenched his teeth, his breath coming in sharp gasps again.

You don't love him. He used you. Used you to get your father's company. Used you to get sleep. He hurt you. Took you away from the people who mattered to you. Made your heart ache day and night. He did this to you. He imprisoned you in this place. Trying to tie you down with a ridiculous ring. Claiming to the world that he has a lover. But you weren't. You are fake. Not real. Your relationship, your engagement, everything about you is a lie. How can you love him? You don't love him.

You don't love him.

"Minho? Oh my god what's happening?"

He was completely unaware that his rapid breathing and ever tightening hands had woken you up already. He was sweating profusely at the moment, rather than being at ease, he looked like he had just been through life and death. The veins on his forehead are popping up, and his eyes are red.

You have your back to him so you can't even see him now, but you know this must be very unusual. You reach out and stroke his hands that are tightened around your waist, trying to calm him down. But he keeps his eyes tightly closed, muttering these words you can't understand, and his whole body is tense. Such symptoms you've seen before, these were the symptoms of a panic attack.

"Minho...listen to me, let go......" "No, no, no... I won't let go, please don't let go...... Don't..."

The word "let go" triggered him somehow, and instead of letting go, he tightened his grip a lot more. You're at a loss as to what to do in this situation. You didn't know he had anxiety issues, he never told you that.

"It's okay, you don't have to let go... Can you at least hear me? Minho, you are having a panic attack now. Take a deep breath... Take a deep breath and focus on my words. Don't think about anything else, whatever it is, take a deep breath."

"Y/N... Y/N ......" He keeps calling your name, pleading for help. He's asking you for help. "I can't sleep...What do I do? I, I......"

"Shhh... Don't be afraid. Just calm down and we can talk slowly when you're calm. Now, for me, take a deep breath first, okay?"

You felt him nod behind you, then you heard him slowly inhale deeply and exhale shakily after a few repetitions of this motion, you felt him seem to relax a little and his heartbeat against your back smoothed out considerably.

"Can I turn around and look at you?" You ask softly. "It's important to share what's on your mind so it doesn't keep building up. That's what you said to me before, isn't it?"

His embrace loosens a little, giving you room to move around. You took the opportunity to turn around and sit up, pulling him up with you. He wasn't crying, but his face was pale, his lips filled with blood as if he'd been bitten through them, and his eyes were just as bloodshot. Heartbroken, you reached out to touch his cheek, rubbing your fingers over his lower lip.

He grabs your wrist and brings his hand down with it on the sheets. His eyes droop without looking at you, even as he still trembles a little unconsciously. In a silent attempt to stop you from being overly caring. But the small movement of his hand tightening tells you that he doesn't want you to leave him alone. Such a torn mood is exactly the same as yours that night.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

He shook his head. He couldn't say it, couldn't tell you that he was in love with you. He couldn't tell you that he'd had a panic attack after four years because he'd lost sleep for the ridiculous reason that "you weren't wearing the ring he said you didn't have to wear". It was too ridiculous for him to say.

"Can you listen to me if you don't want to speak?"

He looks up slightly, not quite sure what you mean.

You don't let go of his hand, but your other hand reaches back and touches the nightstand next to your bed. Pulling open the first drawer, you pull a ring out of it. It's the engagement ring he gave you. The ridiculously large diamond on it still shines in the night. The light hurts Minho's eyes a little, but not a million percent as much as it hurts his heart.

"The reason you're acting strange today is because I'm not wearing it, isn't it?"

His eyes widened a little. It wasn't just for that reason, of course, but when it came to what made him the way he ended up today, it sure as hell had to be because of the ring. He thought this and nodded slightly. There was a sad look in his eyes. Of course you've noticed, you're Y/N, he can't hide anything from you. Every move he made, every little detail was in your eyes. He has nowhere to run. You might have figured out that he's in love with you. Maybe the reason you're not wearing the ring is because you want to tell him: don't get ahead of yourself, I don't love you at all. But he doesn't want to hear that. He doesn't want to hear your explanation. He doesn't want to hear you talk about that person. He wants to lie to himself for a little while longer. At least try to stop himself from loving you more deeply.

"Do you know you're an idiot?" "What?"

He couldn't believe his ears.

"Minho, I don't know why you think a diamond this big is pretty. Everything else you war is low-key, so why does this ring have to be so outrageously magnificent? I was simply embarrassed to wear it out."

His whole body froze. Then frowned. He did want to go and lie to himself but not with that kind of excuse.

"You don't have to think about my feelings to make up this kind of-" "Lie? It's not a lie. Why do you think it was? Because I'm too embarrassed to admit I'm your fiancée? Or because you think I think wearing a ring is like being chained to a collar?"

Minho pursed his lips, none of these were the reasons that came to his mind. But they were also all very valid reasons. Maybe you actually thought that. That was a reason he could accept. But he knew it wasn't. Your reason is clearly because...

"Hwang Hyunjin," he said the name, in a barely audible voice. Each pronunciation was bitten so tightly that the jealousy simply couldn't be hidden. He didn't try to hide it, either.

Hearing the name, this time it was you who froze. You never expected to hear Hyunjin's name from his lips. You didn't even know he knew Hyunjin's full name. But what does Hyunjin have to do with the ring- Your thoughts are suddenly interrupted by yourself. So that's it. You realize something, and then suddenly feel the urge to laugh.

"You think that I don't wear the ring you gave me... because I'm still in love with Hyunjin?" you never thought that words like this, which you would only hear in soap operas, would come out of your mouth.

Your question felt like a test and a confirmation, and Minho didn't know how to react. "Is it not?"

"Are you kidding me?" You replied immediately. A look of disbelief on your face. "I've told you many times that we don't have that kind of relationship anymore, right?"

He lowered his face again, but you didn't give him that chance and cupped his chin, making him look up at you. His cheeks flushed slightly and his eyes drifted around afraid to look at you.

"Not having that kind of relationship...doesn't mean, that your feelings...... forget it, it's my own problem. Whether you wear a ring or not shouldn't have anything to do with me..." "But I'm not wearing it, and you're upset because of it aren't you? So we should fix that."

You put the ring, cupped in your other hand, on the middle finger of your left hand and waved it in front of him.

"Do you see? It's ridiculously big and it doesn't look good at all. If you want me to wear a ring you give me, please give me a simpler one. I don't want to show off loudly in front of everyone that 'I'm a billionaire'."

Minho felt so ridiculous at the moment. You don't sound like you're joking at all. You could barely hold back your laughter when he mentioned Hyunjin's name. Even when he said that person's name you didn't react the way you used to. Could it be that he was overthinking it? Was he overthinking it all along? You really... Just don't wear the ring because you think it doesn't look good? Is that the reason? But that reason...... Seems kinda reasonable.

"Really? As long as I get a different one, you'll wear it?" You don't know if it's just your, but you can see a look of anticipation in his eyes. It's still a look you haven't seen on his face before, and it feels a little new.

"I'll wear it if it's a better looking one, I promise." You said as you took the ring off again and put it back in the drawer. When you turned back to him, you saw him rubbing the back of his neck a little awkwardly, his mind wondering what was going on. But the good thing is that the paleness of his face is gone. "And ah, Minho-ah," he hears you call to him, looking up and cocking his head. "I don't agree with what you said to me this afternoon. Not a single word of it."

He blinked, as if recalling what he had said earlier.

Right, a few hours ago... No, it would have to be ten hours ago now, wouldn't it? What he said to you in the living room. "We're not real" and "I'm just making a fool of myself". Those were the two lines.

"We're not fake. This engagement is real, and so am I. I'm your fiancée now, and that's not going to change. And don't you try to push me away. This is between the two of us, isn't it? I don't like the cold tone you used this afternoon. Don't ever speak to me in that tone again, do you hear me?"

He smiled and closed his eyes, raising his hands above his head as if he had surrendered. He was completely devoid of his earlier panic attack at this point, as if it hadn't even happened. It was like he was back to his old self who liked to flirt with you and was a bit annoying, but funny and charismatic. After a few moments he opened his eyes again and then spoke slowly.

"I hear you, my fiancée."

You smile at his answer and nod in satisfaction, before extending your hand to him.

"So, I'll ask you once more. Want to sleep?"

You expected him to meekly take your hand, but instead he he slapped your hand away and swooped right in and hugged you. Then flung you sideways onto the bed, his head buried in your chest. You felt shocked for just a moment, but smiled even as you felt the corners of his mouth slowly rise. He really did seem to be doing better.

"You hurt my heart, and even though you didn't mean it, I was upset for a long time. You have to make it up to me. I'm going to sleep with you in my arms tonight." His voice was muffled quite a bit by the fabric on your chest, but you managed to take in every word. You burst out laughing after hearing it and shook your head a little.

Sure enough he was still a childish guy, and that side wasn't something he pretended to be. But there's a world of difference between when he's serious and when he's relaxed. Although his hug was a bit sudden and you haven't asked for a lot of things yet. But by now he should be tired too, right? And, he's right, you did seem to hurt him without even realizing it. Let's just pretend it's your fault and compensate him today. With that thought, you stroke his hair and slowly close your eyes.

"Okay, goodnight, my fiancé." I love you.

But those are three words you're not ready to say yet.

You knew it was probably your new ring when Minho appeared in front of you two afternoons later with a small box in hand. Instead of getting down on one knee, he just sat beside you and opened the box. Inside lay quietly two plain silver rings. The outside was clean, with only a small ring of diamonds on the side. Minho picks one of them up, looks at it, confirms something and places it in your hand. Telling you it was designed by his own hand. Your eyes widen and you look at him with some disbelief.

"There's no reason you can't wear it this time, is there?" He asks, narrowing his eyes and smiling.

You shook your head and picked up the tiny ring and put it on your finger. It was just the right size, much better fitting than the previous one. It seemed that he had indeed designed it with care. The moment you put it on you feel something strange inside, so you take it off and look at the ring's inner ring. Only then do you notice that his initials are engraved within.

"My inside is your name, how's that? That way, you and I are tied to each other, and not just you to me."

There was still something childish about it, but looking at his very self-satisfied expression, you smiled and gave approval.

So the ring fiasco was over, but the question of your relationship was still not perfectly answered. You still haven't been able to tell him how you feel about him and he hasn't been very forthright in telling you that he likes you. You believe you're both just pondering how to say it, rather than the feelings themselves. It's just that you feel like there's still something missing between you. So little short of something that would finally push you a little more.

And soon, that something comes.

tag list:

@helpsplease @fight-me-m8 @qtieskz @yubinism @ateez-babygirl @skzooo @chanstresour @aerastus @my-dark-happy-place @otwo @skylar27 @owls-and-stars @stay-here-dont-stray @analusanchez @cucu-skks @yoshiunova @lixielv @nctdom @endzii23 @lachimolalas-posts

[papers4me]

Fruits Basket Manga Review , ch 111

sigh~~~ I feel that my recent posts are a bit negative towards the anime, but thats cuz the chapters I’ve read so far are either unbelievably important character depth content cut for no valid reason or content in the anime but packed with million other things that it lost its purpose or importance. Basically tohu’s ep 6 which consists of 4 chapters & now ep 5 which is a momiji ep & yup, packed with 4 chapters as well... so, I apologize for any negativity, my intention is just analyzing artistic & story-telling aspects, I love se03, but yeah it screwed up lots of important characters due to its not so thorough plot decisions & harmful character insight choices.

today.. we explore Momiji... but only before his curse breaks.

Furuba anime struggling to know how to design an episode based on various plot-heavy chapters?

so, they decided 13 eps, & decided one ep for momiji cuz motoko’s graduation & the fanclub is the core of the furuba & have already cut tons of tohru, cuz who cares? she’s kind. be like her. end of lesson. No. really, jokes aside, how to do this?

How to combine several chapters in one ep? collect small snippets from chosen chapters/content like a bee does flowers? you gotta skip some content, you gotta highlight others. The ep is only 20 min after all & you got an op & Ed that you cant always skip.... so.. furuba team decide that momoji’s ep should be true to his zodiac animal, this is the rabbits last appearance in spirit. so, they went with quick hopping from one chapter to the other like a rabbit?

No really, ep 5 is really like a rabbit in its flow, you can’t savior a moment enough before jumping to the other: we learned momiji grew up!! loves toheu romantically, challenged kyo, really meant it, wanted a fair love game, got freed, lost tohru romantically & faced momiji! but that’s not all? we still have space!! quick add akito’s moodiness & love triangle with her dog & her submissive bed partner, add a happy comedy for no reason whatever & make shigue kiss tohru & wish shes 'was his lover instead!!!!!!!!! Mind you all this happened in the anime before shigure hurt tohru with his “the truth of the zodiacs talk & them accepting & feeling consolance that kyo is doomed”talk. 

-Gets whats my biggest surprise after reading this chapter ?????????

Shigure is consistent!! He isnt a rabbit hopping here & there. The dog is loyal & is tired for good reason! Him being depressed & his weird talk with thoru makes so much sense given the manga’s order.

Kyo is consistent!! In the anime, momiji surprise him with confession he loves tohru & challenge him, then kyo la~la~la~joins them downstairs for curry. Not a single expression on his face, where is the expression? it will appear when the plot is forced to address it: by the end of the ep when momiji face hin again. Then we get kyo’s reaction.

I need someone to tell the anime that actions require a reaction. You can refrain from showing a certain reaction if you can’t address it now, but you can’t erase it, negate it, then make it appear when have to!!!! couldn’t they make kyo refuse to join them & eat together? the     other characters wont be surprised they think he’s needlessly moody. The audience will know that kyo is troubled with momiji’s challenged & it will excite them!!! having kyo just go eat & watch the momiji/hiro/haru/yuki comedy skit is weird.

The manga’s author wanted kyo to join the dinner, like the anime did. but huge difference. the author actually cares for logic reaction & understands that the audience aren’t dumb little kids that will sit & wait for kyo’s turn to...react! nope! she did this: (a) & (b) below.

-Lost Small Bits/ Panels from the chapter.. But Sadly Big Huge Chunks for Characters buildup & Growth:

(a) addressed the fact the hiro noticed kyoru is in love & dressed that shigure was right!! the cat being in love is a weird concept to the zodiacs! hiro reacted naturally & the author used hiro to flesh yuki’s (the rat), momiji’s (the rabbit) & haru’s (the cow) decision to silently watch the kyo (the cat) makes his own decisions to live!!! They won’t interfere or tell akito or remind him of his state as the doomed caged cat. So sad this moment is cut from yuki. Why must yuki only interact with kyo to beat him (all seasons)? why must yuki only think of kyo to envy him (all seasons) ? Here, yuki’s growth towards kyo as a person & his relationship with tohru is 1000 times better than all tohru is my mom’s sh!t & I envy kyo’s Sh!t we saw in the anime over & over till we memorized it.

(b) kyo didnt just go la~la~eat with momiji after knowing he loves tohru. Nope, there’s small bits missing: called logical emotional reaction. He was surprised he’s caught pining over tohru! cuz yuki, the audience representative, has told us in the previous chapter that ppl in love dont notice anything around them. Kyo thinks him being cold hid his feelings. the dummy’s feelings are as bright as the sun in the Sahara, tohru too. a child read her! such small thing that wont take much space from the ep but was cut cuz kyo only needs to be responsive at the ep’s end. & this scene of kyo & tohru looking awkwardly at each other is minor in space but so important cuz kyo is determined to let go but his decision is challenged by not only momiji, but his natural attraction to tohru. Here he knows he’s caught & exposed... here he knows momiji is a better choice for tohru cuz he wont didn’t hurt her mom... here he knows that even yuki is better cuz never had to pretend to be cold to her... here he knows the world is better than him... & here he just cant help by smile & walks towards her... T_T ... another lesson in writing slow burns by Takaya-san.

-Why would the anime team pass on this?? drawing kyoru closer after the epic tear in Cinderella ep, cuz they want empty suspense~! The anime team thinks that if kyo & tohru stand next to each other, then it means all their issues are solved & the audience are so stupid as to forget tohru’s mom, kyo’s imprisonment, kyo not confessing his sins to tohru & tohru’s need to make a choice wether to fogive hom or not.. nope! you see, they think, ppl who read mangas are smart, so the author can give this epic symbolism & pp would still be not sure kyoru is end game & tohru will forgive him or kyo even fogive himself, but ppl who watch, oh no, gotta cut all the plot worthy content, produce a graduation song for a minor character, cut all kyo/tohru interaction cuz it only means romance & not at all character depth & oh if we show yuki actually formulating deep thoughts that aren’t centered around him, the audience might forget his se02 struggles! or that might ruin yuki’s upcoming growth moment in the finale where he .. you guessed it hits kyo.. as he always do & sulk &  think abt himself cuz yuki can only do monologues when he’s directly involved.... man~it is so sad how the anime is dumped down.. Who is the target audience again? not kids as young as hiro cuz even hiro is smart!

-just look:

 Momiji talks abt kyo shouldn't give up loving tohru & the authr shows this this ghost!!! his mom! The author reminds us that kyo isnt da~~~~ forgetting anything. He’s a deeply troubled soul & hos mom wants him locked cuz she too was locked in a cage & thinks that’s safer...why oh why you dump ur own story! sh!t~

Side Notes:

I like the closeups on Kisa’s face as she interacted with kyo. It’s very rare for kisa to have a world beside the endearing parental/big protective bro/big doting sister love she has with tohru & haru & off course the romantic love with hiro which was perhaps since their birth or sth. lol.  Kisa & kyo arent much on the brotherly side as they rarely interact, but its one of those  refreshing  interactions she has that helps cast a new light on her as tiny as it is,  but its sth out of the norm around her. She sees him  around tohru & gets to perceive his true unprovoked character. “He is  nice guy”.

I really wanted to punch kureno this chapter.. like Shigure is a jerk shitty dog for sleeping with akito’s mom but kureno... dude.. you submissively sleep with the guy’s eternal love interest & still walks in on him talking to her!!! lol. you’re mentally, emotionally & physically weaker than him & yet, she puts you on her bed, not him & you, tho not wanting her at all, dont walk away. No wonder shigure is defeated & wishing for someone like tohru, lol! Even if shigure met an older tohru-like person, it wont work. shigure deserve someone like him mean, schemer & loves playing power games. Tohru is someone who values honesty & commutation, not saying she’s an angel on earth, but tohru knows who suits her.. except fate is saying: NO. .... currently. lol.

I know kureno’s weakness is part of his character & I love that such characters exits. There are ppl ike that in real life. It’s just this chapter, I felt shigure’s frustration. XD

Yuki in this ep is the best yuki. no exaggeration here, I love when yuki is calmly thoughtful of others & here its kyo of all ppl !!!! cutting this scene is sad.. without it, kyo & yuki remain a cat & rat in the anime. Only ever thinking abt each other thro envious binoculars or hateful words or yuki giving kyo comedic hitting or life’s problem-solving hitting. Why can’t anime yuki be interactive outside his self-centered issues is beyond me.

Momiji & kyo’s interactions are always the best! whether comedy or drama.

I hated the curry cooking scene in the anime... so weirdly out of the ep’s flow.. very forced comedy... in the manga it had a purpose! not just quick add comedy cuz next shot momiji curse breaks & drama & we’ll close the ep with tears & sadness & glimpses of hope...

I love haru’s answer to hiro... so him.. “a guy can’t fall in love?”so chill.. so..simple.

[floralseokjin]

⤑ 9 months to fall in love 11 replies.

@starbtslove replied: He still came for you. To talk to OC.  Babe don’t be mad at Jinnie 😭😭😂😂 poor guy 🫣💜

How can she be mad at such a sweet man 🥺

@areumhope replied: chapter 11 is hereee!!!! *pterodactyl noises of joy*

I hope you enjoyed! 

@sanzig-ot9 replied: Love love love! Now we know Jin behaved on his 'date' and he is head over heels with oc, but that is still a cheeky cliffhanger! Looking forward to the next chapter!

Yes, there’s no doubt! Thank you for reading! 

@nanied93 replied: Yoona never fails to make me laugh! He didn’t wanna wipe her lipstick of his mouth . “Flex.” 😂 Seokjin teasing  and accepting her bodily functions is so nice to read. What better way to say “I am comfortable with you”? I need to know what happened on that date!!!

The flex line had me laughing so hard to myself 😂 Yuna is the funniest! and I agree, seeing how comfortable both Oc and Jin are together makes my heart burst! All shall be explained today! Thanks for reading!

@vicki1031 replied: Giirrll a part of me wishes Jin was the petty type and did something at the date (like kissed the cheek or something) for the oc’s stupid decision of making him go (he could’ve said no bc he’s a grown man and can make his own decisions but the oc was adamant of him going 🥴 so he listened)  and that cliffhanger of her getting a little snappy(?)…girl how r u gonna be like that when you’re the reason 😭😭 lmao

She knows she’s the reason but she can’t stop 😂 if anything that makes her angrier because she’s annoyed at herself LOL ahh emotions, they really don’t make sense at times! 

@rvluviewendy replied: I'm always here for the pettiness

When you can’t control the petty 😬😂

@pinkseokchim replied: I felt that last sentence. :(

Seokjin’s gonna be like “....oh no” 😂

@seokjinsyoonji replied: Oh god Jordan you are so cruel for ending the chapter on that sentence!! Now how tf will I manage to study physics and not think about what's gonna happen next? And I feel like smacking oc's head, sending 'her man' on a date is ridiculous but ik seokjin, the gentlest of all gentlemen, must've behaved. Now, we need to know what happened of the damn date and I hope things go well between oc and seokjin bc oops she really snapped for no reason.

I hope you studied physics!!!!! “seokjin the gentlest of all gentlemen” 🥺🥺 so true! I’m sure things will go well with the, don’t worry 🤧

@sweett-nightt replied: Jordaaaaaaaaaan agshskslgwg poor Jin he’s probably feeling so bad 😩, why you end it like thatttttt 😢

Poor guy, he probably thought nothing of it and now he’s like shitttt 😂

@seanachais replied: OC being downright petty, but damned if we've not all been there. JIN, YOU A GROWN-ASS MAN, JUST SAY NO TO MAMA KIM. ✨️Boundaries✨️

We definitely have, that’s why I can’t be annoyed at her lol. Thank you for reading! 

@stealth-liberal replied: On the one hand, I get Seokjin not being able to say no to his mother. Korean and Korean diaspora cultures are NOT big on that, no matter how old you are. On the other hand he absolutely should have told Y/N no. He could have just said "Y/N, I really don't want to do this, it makes me uncomfortable, please don't ask me to." As for Y/N, I'm glad she's beginning to realize just how self sabatoging she is. Again, in addition to Seokjin, I ship her with a good therapist. She makes a lot of her own problems. Ugh! It is a testament to your writing that 2 people who don't actually exist can make me this frustrated with them! They may as well be real with the yelling I do at them! You should be complimented on that, because it means that you give them a weight that translates to realness. However, I really do hope Y/N gets the help she needs. I want to see this woman happy goddammit! Can't wait for the next installment.🌹

She definitely makes a lot of her own problems, but at least she’s realising it. It’s all about those life lessons, and she has had a LOT of them in these past four months hahaha. (and will continue to have them). Thank you for reading and sending in your thoughts from time to time, I enjoy hearing them! 

@bri-mal replied: Oooh that last line! That cliffhanger! Just another hump that YN's gotta work through. I feel like this will propel then to either define the relationship or come clean to their families.

I feel like it will too 👀 thank you for reading!

@jkkkkkay replied: OMG that last line!!!! Yuna’s so right with the 1 step forward 2 steps back analogy (love her btw & her absence of filter). I am so excited to how Seokjin will react!!!

She was exactly right! even if she speaks without thinking the majority of the time lmao! 

@oneposhgirl replied: Baby mama has got a spicy zinger for Seokjinnie. Do you think he deserves it?

Probably not no, but being petty is satisfying LMAO

@cravingforhotchocolate​ replied: Who’s in the wrong here? I certainly can’t decide 😂 Contender #1 : Seokjin who didn’t text OC goodnight (and put her in misery for the rest of the night) OR Contender #2 : OC who didn’t text Jin goodmorning back (and put him in misery for the whole morning) 🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔 Seokjin’s reasoning might be that he didn’t want to bother OC incase she’s sleeping already. But his dinner started at 8.30pm. How long can it take for someone to eat his food?! But then again OC is the cause of this date 😂 Omg they’re idiots.. but what does that make me? Mulling over 2 fictional characters says a lot 🤣🤣

I can imagine that Seokjin wolfed down his food as fast as he could trying to leave as early as possible but then his date wanted dessert 🤣 and nooo, it doesn’t make you anything! I’m so touched that you’re thinking about my characters and story 💕

@younghee-17 replied: I read this almost 24 hrs ago but I can still feel the pain from “You always message me goodnight too.” HELP 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

Poor Oc 😭😭

@majamarantha replied: I am a 101% Seokjin bias but damnnnnn. Why no goodnight? 🥲

I wonder what his answer will be 🤔

@lookhere-2seok replied: IM SCREAMING!! this chapter wheww 😮‍💨😮‍💨 that makeout scene in the alley?? it was so mf hot, i swear this “taking it slow” plan isn’t working out for these two 😭😭 and omg that cliffhanger! i’m sure seokjin has a good reason as to why he didn’t text her goodnight, but i’m all for the drama!! i’m obsessed with this fic, can’t wait to know what happens next 🤩 ty for writing 💜

They have both shown impressive restraint but it can only work so far..... especially when they’re kissing like THAT out in public lmao! Thank you so much for reading and always sending your thoughts! I love hearing them! 

@arisud replied: This was a roller-coaster, gir hahahah I have a lot of feelings, what happens to her? I mean!!! It is so clear! Thank God Yuna is there! Christ! And i need to say: I love that hot kiss!!! 🔥 it was a great chapter. Thank you!!!!

Thank you so much, I’m happy you enjoyed!!

@notfunnybutfunny replied: I can't help laughing

They’re both idiots lol 

@leanimal90 replied: I am also mad at Jin first for going on the date second for no good night text and third for ignoring OC sexual needs !

awww no, bless him, he’s only trying to do the right thing 🥺

@jwlmnbt replied: THAT CLIFFHANGER THOOOOOOOO

They’re back!!!!

@mxxyxxg replied: damn. the last line lmfao

Petty Mode: Activated 

@purest-expressionofgrief reblogged and said: seokjin is an angel. i trust him with all my heart. but also! i know that just like oc i too am dumb enough to make the same decision of sending my baby daddy on a date THEN still proceed to feel upset and jealous about it later – so i feel her <3+ comfortable domestic moments like the fart convo crack me up so much but i love them AKSHAJ they seem so realistic to me like i'm pretty sure i've heard my parents joke abt sounding like a motorcycle taking off, or something similar, too 💀💀💀

I’d probably do the same tbh, so I can’t be mad at her lol and 😂😂 I probably heard something similar from my parents too! That’s how that line made it in here 😂

@codeinebelle reblogged and said: NOOOOOOOO 😭😭😭😭😭 they are so stupid and so in love 😭 I might have cried a little, and that ending??? I’m devastated (and hoping for seokjin and Yn to sort themselves out) 

I’m sure they will sort it all out with some healthy communication! 

@minttangerines reblogged and said: See! I blame Yuna! OC was feeling good until Yuna started running her mouth! And then her attitude shifted! I can’t wait until her showdown with Jungkook. Yuna is that friend who knows the taste of your hand because of how often you have to cover her mouth.OC just needs to figure out her feelings. Its not fair to Jin. He’s trying to remain loyal and keep everyone happy but its putting him in really uncomfortable positions. 

In Yuna’s defence, Oc was having doubts the day before, she just hadn’t let on. If Yuna knew how much she was regretting it, she wouldn’t have said the stepmom thing, but then again... it’s Yuna so idk 😂 ‘Yuna is that friend who knows the taste of your hand because of how often you have to cover her mouth” is SO spot on, I can’t stop laughing! and I agree, this chapter wasn’t very fair on Jin and Oc will realise that too. 

@purpuravm reblogged and said: I just want them to be together, is obvious that they love each other !  I hope that y/n could be clear with him and tell wich ones are here real feelings. Those two are the perfect couple. Btw, Yuna is rigth with everything that she said about the date. She's my favorite character 💜

I don’t think they’re in love yet, but it’s definitely getting there! With better communication, they have the potential to be a great couple, they suit one another really well and their chemistry is 🤧 Yuna is great, I’m glad you’re enjoying her! 

@rj-moon reblogged and said: Oh my god my heart dropped. I’m feeling every emotion. I’ll be back to write a thorough response. Let me just wallow for awhile.  +

Okay I’ve had time to wallow. Though I won’t think that helps what I feel.  

So I know yn must be going through it. How can she really ask him not to go on the date when they’ve decided to take it slow and by ear. I’d feel “am I being too possessive?” Or “do I even have the right to ask?” But at the same I can imagine Seokjins inner dialogue of how he received hearing yn tell him he should go on the date. He could just be like “just tell me you don’t want me to, I won’t.” Or he could just even want to hear it from yn that she just doesn’t want him to. Hearing her kinda of go “yeah go for it” (even though I know that’s not how she said it) he could feel.. in his feels about it.  They’re so scared of ruining what could potentially be, but at the same time… I feel like this could also hurt their relationship as well. The kicker is, is that this situation is so realistic, and I mean how they’re approaching it, their hesitance. The fact that they’re scared they feel more than the other, or they think the other is only staying with them because of glob.  

Jin doesn’t want to freak yn out by wanting too much think she doesn’t want the same. And yn is insecure that the only reason why jin is even here and staying at all is because of glob. It hurts, so much? But in a good way. Well. In that good way someone reading would appreciate a book is even making them feel something so real and visceral.

Ahh, I’m so happy you’re feeling their hesitancy with the whole situation! It’s a tough one because we as readers know that they both really like one another but are afraid for the same reasons. We want them to talk it out, but at the same time, can understand why they’re not. But don’t worry, because all of this is happening for a reason! It’s pushing them to be honest with one another despite how difficult it is! 

I’m hurt but in the best of ways. The cliffhanger was powerful, the nail in the coffin if you will. I could feel the hurt that yn felt with that one phrase. I can feel her insecurities literally manifest in one night. I can’t wait to find out how the blind date went with Seokjin and Suzie?? Was it?? I’m sick to my stomach thinking about it, but I’m too curious.. the worst part is, is that suzie is probably a really great person. Yn probably can’t help but feel like she’s in the way of his great romance. But what she doesn’t realize, and what jin wants her to realize, is that they could have their own great romance too. 🥺

K I hurt my own feelings too much for one night.

Aw, you’ve hurt my feelings too :((( now I feel emo for my fave couple 😭 but you’re right, they can and ARE having their own great romance 🥺 Thank you so much for reading! I hope chapter 12 eases your pain!!!

@munirecs reblogged and said: “you always message me goodnight too”ayoooo………. no words.

She really went there LMAO

@moonsrecs reblogged and said: Ahhhhh this update!! My inner Yuna really came out and I was mentally scolding OC for that *thing* she did 😩 like ma’am, seriously! 😭 Seokjin was being super attractive in this one, I just hope the both of them stop being silly and talk about what they are. Aside from that though, the angst was really good and despite the frustrations I am here for any and every angsty moment I get 🤧. Such a good chapter, and that ending… oof. Can’t wait to see what Seokjin says. 

I love it when our inner Yuna’s come out!!! I do love me some angst, I have to keep things exciting! and of course it helps them confront their feelings 🥰 Thank you for reading! 

@louisianaspell reblogged and said: “It’s basically one step forward, two steps backwards with you two!”Yuna is out here speaking the gospel truth about these two dummies in love 

Yuna the voice of (annoying) reason 😇

@ot7borahae reblogged and said: I have a million and one things I should actually be thinking about but I just know this will be the only thing on my mind until the next update 😭

hahaha thank you! I hope you enjoy chapter 12 💖

@moonchild1 reblogged and said: WHAT A CLIFFHANGER!!!!! oc is one confusing women and cue the slow burn, maybe talking to yuna and looking at the girls insta was a bad idea... poor seokjin i feel for him he obviously likes oc and just went on the date to get his mom  off his back and clearly he didn't want to go on the date but you have to admit not texting wasn't a good thing she was already acting weird after he told her about going on the date so he should have texted but ooh i can't help but love the drama i can't wait to see his response to that...

Poor Oc is confused at herself don’t worry 😂 Seokjin made an error in judgement, bet he’s regretting it now lol! Thank you for reading!!!

@kookierecs reblogged and said: Omg that ending!!!!! Why didn’t he text her tho? I would have reacted the same way. 

I would have too 🤷🏻‍♀️ so at least we made Oc feel better lol 

[pr1ncessm00n]

hey everyone :) a little chat/ serious psa below

sorry for my unannounced hiatus lol- i’ve had a bit much on my plate. but my plate is cleared! i can’t say the last chapter of common sense will come this week because i’m still drafting and i want it to be a perfect, long, ending to this series 💕 it’s my favorite one i’ve written so far so i want to do it, and y’all, justice!

i also started a stan twitter! so if you would like to go ahead and follow that my username is @mikasas2casa (hehe creative ik). i am also on AO3 where i will crosspost my fics! my ao3 used is the same as my tumblr, but i haven’t uploaded anything yet as i’m still trying to make it work. i refuse to join wattpad tho that’s too far gone for me, rip old wattpad you will be missed.

i won president at school!! so that means more responsibility, but hey it’s what i wanted so i’m very pleased :)

serious time…

the only thing i ask is to please not flood my inbox with asks about when i’ll update again lol. i try to be as active as possible but sometimes i just can’t sit and chat or respond to everyone asking me when i’m gonna write. it makes me feel rushed and like i’m only seen as a source of entertainment lol. while i did have sunday as my usual update day, i’ve tried my best to abide by it but i am human and things do come up. which is why i’m letting everyone know ahead of time that this sunday nor this week is a guaranteed publish date. yes i am working hard on it and i have not put it off, but i am also a full time student, work two jobs (one internship which is unpaid), and frankly this is a side hobby for me. it doesn’t mean i don’t love it, but obviously i have priorities and i won’t be able to write if i’m broke and degreeless lol. rudeness doesn’t really get you anywhere besides blocked so i just wanted to make that clear! i also have a bunch of requests to work on so i’m trying my best to provide multiple sources of content. i do enjoy writing but when people send me rude asks or rude messages directly it kind of sucks the fun out of that.

i also want to make it clear that i joined tumblr as a creative outlet and with no intention to gain a bunch of followers or be noticed! and i do appreciate almost 500 followers in such a short time and over 600 notes, i didn’t join for clout at all so not to sound like a total bitch but if this is becoming toxic i won’t hesitate to leave, and then we all lose. so i think it pays off to be nice if im writing something you supposedly want me to continue lol <3

and please, while i don’t mind interacting with you guys in comments just please be mindful that i have my own struggles and like i said, tumblr is my safe place to escape that for a bit. so if you’re trauma dumping in my inbox or dms it’s kind of uncomfortable for me and i am not qualified fo give anyone advice on how to deal with traumatic situations lol so just please be mindful that i’m just a nineteen year old trying to write fanfiction. i’ve already had some pretty crappy interactions with online friends in the past so i just prefer to keep my space sometimes, and i’m not averse to friendship! but i do prefer to just be a bit more private sometimes lol. i know that sounds weird bc i tell y’all updates on my life and stuff but that’s more general stuff, not deep dark personal secret time lmaoo so let’s be mindful of that please.

thank you for all the support and appreciation you’ve shown <3 and no i’m not mad at any of you (except the rude nonnies in my dms demanding an update?? i wish youd expose yourself so i could block u lol) but im just not very good at establishing boundaries and thats something i need to work on without offending anyone!! ok i talk too much bye guys <3 see u soon!

[drawlfoy]

Mirror, Mirror Finale P.2

masterlist  request guidelines

pairing: draco x ravenclaw reader

request: yes very highly requested lol

summary: despite never speaking before, y/n has a big crush on draco malfoy, a particularly broody and obnoxious slytherin. what will happen when they finally have to start associating? and what if they run into a certain mirror that shows you what you truly desire?

warnings: cursing!

a/n: so ik i said this was gonna be out later this week but i love you guys too much! here it is...the final part of mirror, mirror! it’s weird to finally finish a series like this but ohhhh boy here we are

taglist: @theres-a-dog-outside-omg @mey-rapp @kaibie @blackpinkdolan @the-wiener-soldierrrrr @sugarbby99 @gruffle1 @missmulti @cleopatera @hahaboop @accio-rogers @geeksareunique @eltanin-malfoy @war-sword @cams-lynn @itsivyberry @ayo-cowbelly @nerd-domland @yesnerdsblog @shizarianathania @evanstanfanatic @strawberriesonsummer @hariosborn @night-ving @straightzoinked @imintoodeeptostop

word count: 2.1k

“About time you got off your arse.”

“Hello to you too, Rena,” Y/N sighed as she dropped her satchel on her bed. Her roommate watched, bemused, as she began to unpack her things. 

“How are you?” she asked, her voice noticeably softer. “I really missed you. We were all worried sick, you know.”

Y/N snorted, tossing her wrinkled robes on the bed and making a mental note to spell them neat later. “I do know. Madame Pomfrey was going to kill me for how many times she had to tell you to leave me and let me rest.” 

Rena’s eyes sparkled.

“I’m fine, thank you,” said Y/N. “I missed you too.”

The two sat in silence for a bit as the cold afternoon breeze wafted into their room, carrying the smell of fresh snow in. 

“So, anything exciting happen? Did anyone tell you anything….interesting?”

“No.” Y/N was about to turn back to her work before she caught the mischievous expression on Rena’s face. “What? Why?”

“Nothing,” she sang. “I’m just wondering. I have to catch up with my best friend, you know. It’s been forever.”

“It’s been the whole of four days.”

“It’s been forever,” she restated, jumping up and spinning Y/N around (who couldn’t help but allow a slow grin to spread across her face). 

“I was going crazy in there.” Y/N’s voice was considerably more serious. “I never told you, but--” she chose to ignore the look of anticipation written all over Rena’s face, “--Malfoy talked to me. And he was so nice to me, it was we--”

“That COWARD!” 

The outburst started Y/N, who dropped her things on the floor in shock. “I’m sorry? Rena, what happened?”

“I can’t tell you,” said Rena, her tone dutiful and mournful. “It’s not my place. Anyways, what did that loser do?”

“Er,” began Y/N, “I don’t know how much of it was real or if it was because I was on pain potion, but he and I--I don’t know, flirted? There was a lot of banter, and before he knew it he pulled me off the ground--”

“You were on the ground?”

“--he pulled me off the ground and picked the gravel out of my palms.” Y/N swallowed as she recounted the instance. She’d never seen him look so soft before. “He said he had something he wanted to tell me, and his voice got all strange.”

“And then?” 

“And then Madame Pomfrey came to yell at me and basically--oh god, Rena, she basically told him that I dreamt of him!”

Rena snorted with laughter. “Shit, dude. I don’t think you should worry, though. You’d think any bloke with half a brain would’ve figured out that you were obsessed with him by now.”

“Shut up.” Y/N’s face was hot. “Anyways, I haven’t seen him since. I’d prefer if we could stop talking about this.”

“Sure, sure.” She took in a breath. “Wait, what about rounds? Don’t you still have to see him?”

“No. Flitwick told me I’m off. At least until next month.” If she sped through the thought, it didn’t hurt as much.

“Ending of a chapter, huh? How are you feeling about that?”

Y/N sighed. “Honestly, Rena, I love you, you know I do, but I don’t want to talk about this anymore. Okay? It’s over.”

If her words carried any deeper meaning to Rena, she didn’t show it. “Lighten up, girly. Maybe it’s not.”

“All I’ve done is make a fool of myself,” lamented Y/N, throwing her empty satchel in the closet and collapsing onto her bed. “I’m just going to go back to what everything was before. This hasn’t changed anything. Now, Rena, I have a Potions exam to study for.”

“Whatever floats your boat.”

~

Her interactions with Draco were few and far between in the following weeks. Sometimes she caught a few glimpses of a pale blonde head of hair as she walked down the halls to her classes, but nothing concrete, nothing even close to the amount of interaction they had while she was still bound to her rounds. 

It was certainly a punch in the gut--after all, she did spend a good portion of her academic career thirsting over him--but the sensible part of her knew that this was for the better. Her schoolwork became her top priority again, just like it had been the years before she was assigned to be his partner.

So, given this pattern of communication, it was fair to say that Y/N was completely and utterly flabbergasted when she saw Draco waiting by the entry of her common room at 11pm one night.

“Can I help you?” she asked as she shifted the books in her satchel to be secured over her shoulder.

“Yes, actually,” he said smoothly, not tripping over his words in the slightest. “I have rounds tonight.”

“I’m aware.” She hoped that he couldn’t hear her heart pounding the way that it was.

“And I’m out of Wide-eye potion.” 

“That really sucks,” Y/N said as she held up her hand on the door of the common room, uttering the riddle’s answer under her breath before she stepped in. 

“Wait!” His voice turned her around--it was pleading, almost desperate. “I have an exam tomorrow. No one in Slytherin has any. Snape would kick my arse for waking him up now. I know you have some left over since you never finished the rounds, and I--I understand if you don’t want to but it doesn’t have a very good shelf life anyways and I was hoping you’d...that you’d be alright with giving it to me.”

She paused, completely stunned. The most hopeful part of her wondered if he had made this up, but she squelched this with a force that nearly knocked the wind out of her. “Fine. Come with me, you must be freezing outside.” 

Y/N wasn’t wrong--the weather had taken a turn in the past few days to be bitterly cold--but it wasn’t like she’d object seeing him for any longer. She mentally cursed herself for being so weak-willed.

Draco looked pleasantly surprised at the suggestion and stepped into the common room with her, following her up until she reached the base of the stairs. “I’ll wait here.”

“If you’re comfortable,” she began, “I’d honestly prefer if you came with me. I don’t want to explain to anyone why I let you into our common room unsupervised.”

He looked like his mind was buffering the information for a second, standing with a glazed look in his eyes before he sucked in a breath and became the picture of confidence once again. “Want me in your room that bad?”

Yes.

“You wish.”

He scoffed as they climbed the stairs, Y/N a few steps above him. She thought that if she maintained the space he wouldn’t see how hard she was shaking and wondered where Rena was. Studying with Hermione like she told her she was? She hoped.

Y/N stopped in front of her door at the very end of the hall, decorated with a banner that had their names displayed in glittering bronze letters that moved in the light. “Ok. You can come in with me if you want--it might be a couple minutes since I don’t quite remember where it is.”

He looked amused with himself as she got out her wand and attempted to unlock her door with the specialized charm she and Rena had decided upon. Mortifyingly enough, her hand was too shaky to execute it.

“Hey, hey,” Draco tutted, holding his hand out. It enveloped hers and held her wand still as she muttered the incantation, unlocking the door and swinging it open. 

“Er...thanks,” she said. His hand was still over hers. 

Y/N broke the eye contact to dart through the door to a thankfully dark and empty room--if Rena had seen that, she never would’ve let her hear the end of that--and began rifling through her drawers as Draco shut the door and examined her room.

“You’re flustered,” he noted as she tipped over one of her candlesticks and just barely managed to catch it. “Is everything okay? Trouble in paradise, little Ravenclaw?”

“Like you care.” Y/N shut the desk drawer with an audible BANG. “And don’t call me that. Rowena Ravenclaw is rolling in her grave hearing you infantilize her good name like that.”

Draco laughed from his stance by her door--a sound that she hated to admit that she really missed. “I take back what I said. You certainly sound like yourself.”

Y/N’s fingers finally closed around the last bottle of Wide-Eye, which was quickly tossed to Draco. “Happy now?”

He sent her a strangely weak smile as he slipped the vial into his pocket, no doubt silk lined and expensive. “Sure. So this is goodbye? Actually?”

“I think...I think so.” 

Y/N had moved closer to him so only about a foot stood between them, a distance that felt like a mile from where she stood. 

This is goodbye.

Draco was making a motion to turn around and open the door when Y/N experienced the most severe lapse of judgement in the entirety of her 17 years.

She sprung forward, her fingers curling around the satiny soft fabric of his tie and pulling. Her motion was rough enough that he jolted forward, his eyes wide with surprise as Y/N closed in and pressed her lips to his in a very chaste and ungraceful movement. 

The split second that it took for her to realize the consequences of her actions was enough for her to let go completely and jump away, apologies readily falling out of her mouth in disjointed and clumsy collections. 

“I’m so sorry...Oh my god...I have no idea what got into me...Draco, I--”

Before she could finish, his hands were already cupping her face, his frame bent down the slightest so he could be more level with her. And he was--oh--he was kissing her, actually properly this time, without the tense closed-offness of her first attempt.

When Y/N imagined what it was like to kiss Draco Malfoy, she didn’t imagine him to be so soft. Or warm. Or gentle, or pliant, or whatever other good things he was to her as he snaked her arms around her and held her tight to him.

His kisses turned feverish, almost desperate as he turned her so she was pressed up between him and the wall. Everywhere his hands touched felt charged with electricity and energy, and as his hands traveled up and down her spine she decided that this must be what it’s like to die of happiness. 

“Draco,” she managed in between kisses, pulling away for air for just a moment and sliding back down so her feet touched the floor again. “Can we talk? About this?”

“Thanks,” he responded, his eyes glittering with endearment. “I almost forgot you were a Ravenclaw.”

“Shut up.” 

He grinned but made no effort to step away from her, instead choosing to drag his fingers up and down the side of her exposed neck. “What’s there to talk about? I like you, you like me, there’s nothing we need to do to complicate this further.”

“You...you what?”

“Yes, genius, what else did you think I was planning on telling you that day in the courtyard,” Draco said. “I’ve been avoiding you because I thought you were over me. That was horribly embarrassing, you know. Had to nurse my ego for weeks before I could garner up the courage to speak to you again.” He stopped to gently press the pad of his thumb into the little dimple she had in her left cheek, smiling uncontrollably as he moved his hand back to cup her face.

“How was I supposed to know that?” argued Y/N. 

“Isn’t this supposed to be the smart house?” he teased. 

She slapped his shoulder. “Don’t make me decide I don’t like you anymore.”

“Oh, so you admit it?”

“Admit what?”

“That you like me?”

“I’m going to scream.”

“Just from kissing me? Wow, I must be good.”

“I mean it!”

“So do I!”

Y/N gazed up at the boy in front of her for a few beats, admiring how the moonlight bounced off the silvery strands of his hair and how his smile reached every corner of his face. 

“I take back what I said,” she told him.

“Oh, and what is that?”

“This isn’t goodbye.”

He smiled again, leaning in close so his lips barely brushed her ear. “No. No, it isn’t.”

[still-a-morosexual-help]

OBEY ME! LESSON 49 DETAILED SUMMARY + THEORIES

One locked lesson

Mammon, Luke & MC are visiting Diavolo’s hotel. Mammon talks about wanting to book a suite and have a party, Luke says he doesn’t like the devildom opening businesses in the human world cause he’s scared they’ll take it over completely. Barbatos says that Diavolo is only interested in coexisting in peace & if he’s gonna snitch to Michael he should tell him their actual intentions. Luke says he’s not a tattletale Mammon vehemently disagrees with that. Barbatos reveals that Diavolo & Levi have started staying up till dawn gaming together (I’m so happy they’re friends!). Mammon said he never knew that Levi previously had issues against Diavolo. When Luke asks where Diavolo is Barbatos tells him he’s out on a date with Lucifer. Mammon asks about Barbatos’ choice of human clothes and MC says he looks really good in it. He says the look he was going for is ‘tea leaf importer’. In a private lounge Barbatos serves them fairy ring tea which surprises Mammon & Luke. In the Devildom on rare occasions small sparkling golden flowers grow in a ring rather than the more usual mushrooms, and the teas is supposed to smell like those flowers. He says despite what the ring is made of there’s a legend they form when fairies dance in a circle. Luke says the tea smells and tastes amazing and MC asks if fairies are real. Barbatos says fairies in the human world are supposedly extinct and us humans are really fucking up the ecosystem huh

Mammon seems really disappointed by that and when MC asks why he says that treasure can be found near fairies, leprechauns are also related to fairies btw. Barbatos says there’s still a chance there are fairies somewhere in the human realm – there are rumours about fairy rings made of flowers in the human realm which can only be caused by fairies whereas mushroom fairy rings have a scientific explanation. And that there are rumours that those flowers can be used to make a rare sweet. Obviously Mammon & Luke are excited about finding fairies for their own reasons (AND is this gonna be a Mammon & Luke lesson!??? I desperately need that) and MC says lol good luck with that anyway byeeeee~ Mammon & Luke immediately strongarm MC into coming along. Barbatos tells them to bring some flowers back and he’ll make tea for them out of it. Luke & Mammon briefly argue about whether they’re after sweets or money, and Luke wonders where they might even start looking. Mammon suggests going to a library to find out what they can and Luke is surprised Mammon suggested that to which Mammon gets annoyed.

Mammon suggests splitting up to be more efficient and Luke is surprised ‘efficient’ is part of Mammon’s vocabulary. MC can go with either of the boys. With Luke; they find books about angels and demons, including a picture of Michael but nothing about fairies. Luke says the picture doesn’t capture how amazing Michael really is. MC can say A.) that Luke seems to really love Michael. He says everyone loves Michael before remembering the brothers and saying they’re the only ones who don’t (no offense but everything I hear about Michael has made me highly suspicious of him too – I’ll get into that later). B.) MC asks how Michael’s been doing lately and Luke says the way they worded it made it sound like they know him personally. But he says it’s understandable that they’re curious when Michael’s the greatest angel to exist (how can you say that when Simeon is literally raising you!?). He says Michael is till sad about what happened with the brothers and seems to regret it and that though their portraits are no longer in the Celestial palace you can find Michael standing and staring at the empty spot looking lost time and time again – that though he doesn’t say it, he misses them (I’LL GET INTO IT). Luke says that the brothers are happy in their new home and have forgotten the celestial realm and Michael and that after meeting them Luke acknowledges that they have a FEW good qualities but whenever he remembers Michael standing under that empty spot and how the brothers don’t even stop to think about how Michael feels or to look at things from Michael’s perspective he gets pissed off (do…do you think Luke knows about Lilith…..I – I highly doubt it because the circumstances behind her death and everything we’ve seen and heard about the celestial realm so far makes me feel like the brothers were completely justified to leave it all behind). With Mammon; He finds a book about Angels, Demons, Fairies and their worlds – though it’s mostly about angels and angel!Lucifer. Mammon asks where the part about him is and MC says they’d love to hear about his time as an angel. He says he was really talented and that Lucifer recommended him to be a Cherubim (so the others as angels said that angel!Mammon could do anything he set his mind to and we’ve seen that despite what his brothers say Mammon actually has a pretty vast array of skills and can really step up and be the responsible big brother when it’s needed so am I the only one who feels like Mammon’s that ‘gifted’ kid in highschool who got burnt out and then said fuck it and decided to stop trying? And now everyone looks at him shakes their head and asks wtf happened to him? Solmare gave me a blank canvas of a character to project on to and instead I go and choose Mammon :))) I’m in pain). Michael & Raphael treated Mammon like he was a problem child but Lucifer saw his potential (GIVE ME THEIR BACKSTORY!). MC can ask A.) If he was sad to leave the Celestial Realm. He looks surprised and then thoughtful and distant and says he never thought about it. He says dwelling on the past isn’t his thing but if he had to pick he’d say he didn’t miss it. But he doesn’t hate it and or like he never wants to go back and that he doesn’t hold a grudge (okay so usually during a Mammon centric lesson I write this after I finish the whole lesson instead of one by one after each chapter like I usually do and I’m gonna tell you things happen that show that he might’ve been unconsciously lying about the grudge thing). He says he doesn’t know how his brothers feel and that they maybe less happy with the celestial realm than he is (calling back to the grudge thing we know Mammon tends to bottle things up emotionally, specially when it’s things that hurt him, we also know that right after they fell Mammon was the one who took care of everyone so I think it’s very likely while the others had their emotional fallout about Falling and Lilith and being Demons and Satan’s birth Mammon just never got the chance as he was taking care of their well being and I have this whole fic floating in my head about it let’s see if I put it into words). He says even if they wanted to it’s not like they could go back )  B.) If he loved Lucifer back then. Mammon goes Loved!? LOVED!? -ED!? PAST TENSE!? I still love him and fjeodkkfnak BABY! (love that angel!Mammon refused to admit he loved Lucifer while demon!Mammon was like fuck yeah I love him what’dya think!?). Mammon then blushes and then tells MC not to tell Lucifer cause he’ll get a ‘I knew it’ look and grin like he was self-satisfied. Given how happy Lucifer became the last two times Mammon admitted to caring about him and how in the recent lessons Lucifer said he didn’t think his brothers love him I really want them to tell Lucifer. In the end they don’t find anything. Mammon wants to quit. Luke doesn’t want to, he wants to see Michael’s face when he eats one of the Legendary sweets. Mammon gets annoyed saying that Luke’s always going on about Michael and asking if he’s worth it (NO GRUDGE HMMMMMM?!) Luke gets really pissed in return. Mammon laughs and tells him to cool down and that despite being a demon he’s being honest and asks why a ‘goody-two shoes angel’ so pissed (no grudge huh? I mean it’s miniscule rn but everything’s way too complicated for Mammon to be just over it). Solomon interrupts them and tells them to stop shouting. Okay so first off starting from S2 Michael’s being brought up a LOT and I’m pretty sure MC spoke with as well and nearly met him and he said he’ll have to meet them on a later day. S3’s going into depth about the Celestial Realm and Michael’s getting way more mentions and they’ve started bringing up Raphael as well and at this point I’m 100% sure they’re gonna actually introduce them as new characters? Maybe by the end of the season? And I’d love this cause I need new dynamics and to learn more about the brothers’ past and the celestial realm but it also sucks cause I have such a clear vision of what they look like and ik solmare’s gonna destroy that. ANYWAY I don’t think they’ll introduce “bad guys” to the story given that this is a dating sim at the end of the day and Michael & Raphael will probably wanna bang MC too but with what they’ve given so far the Celestial Realm and the higher up angels seem very morally dubious? We know that Michael as an angel gave out punishments that were worse than Lucifer as a demon – Mammon saying he still shakes when remembering them thousands of years later. We know they were against mixing with humans and demons – enough that they were willing to kill off an angel for healing a human. We know they supported the war with the demons and were not actively looking for a peaceful end to it unlike Diavolo (to the point that even Lucifer one of the highest angel in ranking was surprised by the notion of peace). We know their rules were much more strict than that of the Devildom and Raphael acted as somewhat of an enforcer and he considered human parties immoral. We know they highly looked down on the demons and considered them pure evil & below them despite not really knowing anything about them. And sure all of these facts are things that happened when the brothers were still in the celestial realm and I bet they’ve changed after thousands of years and are more open minded, but have they changed enough? The way ‘Michael’ spoke to MC when he called the brothers wicked despite not really knowing what they are like as demons, despite the fact that ‘wicked’ doesn’t cover what the brothers are at all and that there are probably humans who are worse people than them, that he thought MC would be wicked too just because the brothers liked them, the fact that Luke still had these beliefs that all demons were evil and terrible despite having never met a demon, which were the same beliefs angel!Lucifer had when he met Diavolo thousands of years later, the fact the angels still have a very strict idea of what exactly an angel should be like and enforced those ideas on the brothers during the angel event to the point that after they were back to normal they all freaked out. All makes the angels seem highly…..um? questionable. Also luke said Michael missed the brother, but does Michael actually miss them or does he miss the perfect angel versions of them? We know in the celestial realm the brothers had to repress a lot of their urges, likes and even small parts of their inherent personalities to be accepted/to not be threatened to be kicked out (ex: Mammon supressing his pranks/more playful/mischievous side in the celestial realm vs being comfortable enough to fully express that side despite Lucifer’s punishments in the devildom) to the point that they had a secret room they’d escape to just so they could skip work/hang out/relax, we know angels still see demons as evil beings and probably don’t still accept them despite the peace, we know that Michael’s view of the brothers as ‘perfect angels’ completely strips them of any identifiable characteristics even if you were to compare them to what they were like when they were really angels. So when luke says Michael misses them I feel like he doesn’t miss them he misses them as these perfect angel versions of themselves that never really existed. If this season is about getting MC’s stars will next season be about getting Michael and Raphael to accept the brothers for how they truly are? More interdimensional therapy sessions? Does this make sense? Talk to me

Solomon says he doesn’t know what happened to the fairies but that they’d have more luck finding them if they went out and looked deep in places free from human influence than looking for info in a human library. Mammon says Solomon should change his name to the “not so wise” & Solomon says it’s not like he came up with his nickname in the first place. Luke has the idea to ask Crowe for help. When Mammon asks Levi about his falling out with Crowe Levi says though they aren’t friends anymore he’s still useful. MC asks crowe where they can find fairies and they find out about rumours near Lake Io Lanthe. Though they can only get there and back within a day with a private jet. Mammon says it’s not like they can use their own wings to fly in the human world either and I’M!!!!!!? would Mammon have had to carry MC? Have they seen the brothers flying in the devildom? Has anyone carried them and flown? In the end they decide on an overnight train ride. Levi says the “kids” should probably first get permission from the “adults.” MC who’s a fully independent grown adult doesn’t need permission.

Simeon happily agrees as long as they can find someone to cover Luke’s shifts in the café. Luke asks MC which of the brothers they should ask, there are 6 options and for each the 3 of them imagine the scenario that would take place. 1.) Levi; Simeon getting steadily more and more irritated while Levi tries to win a game instead of working till black-purple smoke is rising out from Simeon even as he smiles sweetly and calls Levi. 2.) Lucifer; looking deeply disappointed with crossed arms says “So, are you going to tell me your order or not? Hurry up. I don’t have all day. I have (list of café related chores) French chocolate cake with hot cocoa? Are you insane? Who in their right mind would pair chocolate cake with hot chocolate?” why is this so funny!?? 3.) Satan; Fully serious “Simeon, table two wants an earl grey. And a pretty kitty special to go with it.” Simeon, “WTF is a pretty kitty special!?” The pretty kitty special is paw shaped pancakes and Simeon thinks they’re cute. In this universe no customers or Levis are harmed. 4.) Asmo; Asmo starts almost instantly hitting on the customer. “You know I don’t usually do this but how about I sit down with you for tea?” Luke says while bright red, “ABSOLUTELY NOT! He’ll turn the Angel’s Halo into a different sort of place.” And umm Luke buddy what exactly were you thinking of here… 5.) Beel; Simeon: Hey have you seen the BLTs? Beel: *actively munching away* No. Can’t find them? Want me to help? Simeon: …Nevermind 6.) Belphie; Orders food for himself from Simeon during a lull in the customers and takes a nap before Simeon even gives it to him. In the end they decide on Satan.

They find Satan at the pizza place watching his tab with a serious expression, Luke wonders if he’s learning new things about the human world (languages, the economy, etc) Mammon says that’s the face he makes when he watches cat videos. When Mammon tries calling him he pretends he doesn’t know them until Mammon’s yelling his name and he can no longer ignore them (Wonder how humans feel about some buy yelling ‘SATAN’ in the middle of a diner). Satan immediately refuses to work at the café cause he’s busy (watching cat videos) until MC lies through their teeth and says that Simeon wants to turn the café into a cat café. Luke jumps on board instantly and starts supporting MC’s claims further adding that as a cat lover they need Satan’s advice and that working part time at the café will give him a better understanding to how the business is normally run. He then agrees to help. (Luke none of that lying seems really angelic…). At the café Satan immediately goes “okay, so… let’s talk cats”. And Simeon’s like????????

At home Lucifer’s still not back from his date & they tell others about their plans for the trip. Asmo says if he had a choice he’d like to meet Narcissus… Mammon tries to play off the fact that he’s nervous about asking permission from Lucifer and Belphie tells them to watch out for Banshees – a type of fairy - when they get there (I first heard about banshees as a little kid and they freaked the shit outta me, gave me way more anxiety than I already had). Satan says there are lots of types of fairies including those that make you fall in love. Mammon is way more interested in them than in Banshees – Asmo tells him he’s being a pervert. Lucifer arrives after dinner and they follow him to his room. Lucifer says a quiet lake might give Mammon the chance for some self-reflection and personal growth (pretty sure Lucifer needs that too ngl) and it’ll give Lucifer some peace and quiet but also who the fuck’s gonna pay for you huh!? Mammon tries to play the “my favourite older brother” card. Lucifer disagrees and they decide to gamble on it – if Mammon wins he gets to go and if Lucifer wins Mammon gets bathroom cleaning duty for a week. Lucifer says Mammon’ll just cheat so MC volunteers to play and Mammon gets really happy that they’d do that for him, saying he feels like crying. Lucifer agrees except if they lose BOTH of them get bathroom duty. MC has to guess if the card Lucifer draws is odd or even. Even’s correct and they get to go without a fuss. If they pick even they lose.

If they lose the next chapter starts with Mammon crying in MC’s room about MC and Luke being allowed to go and not him and how with MC gone bathroom duty is all his, MC says they’ll do anything to get him to forgive them and he blushes and asks them to stay with him till he allows them to leave and that means they’re gonna be at it all night…. ALL RIGHT ANYWAY Luke then texts them saying he’s impressed that they managed to convince Lucifer to let Mammon go and that Lucifer had actually sent Luke three tickets for “Mammon’s journey of Personal Growth” and Lucifer’s such a good dad sometimes I can’t deal with this BS. Mammon immediately runs off to thank Lucifer and you can then hear lucifer screaming at Mammon to get out and stop hugging him cause he’s in the shower and I love them both so much I NEED them being soft to each other more and the only reason Mammon ended up being the avatar of greed is cause Lucifer probably spoilt him rotten growing up *cough*Lucifer’s B’day Present To Him*cough*. If they win the next chapter starts in Mammon’s room where he’s asking crowe, who’s apparently been borrowed from Levi, how much money he could make selling fairy ring flowers, he then asks MC to ask crowe something too. They can ask crowe about tomorrow’s weather or tease Mammon by either asking crowe how to control Mammon or asking if they’re compatible with Mammon. Mammon blushes but Crowe says they’re fairly compatible and if they can control Mammon’s self-destructive tendencies and how he puts money before everything they may last – mammon says all of that is wrong (I mean we have seen that he actually puts MC before money and material goods quite a few times so yeah…). He says they already know how well they work together better than anyone in all the 3 worlds and they don’t need anyone to tell them that and MC kisses him. Mammon blushes and says “yeah ik Luke’s gonna be with us but let’s try and get our own room to share cause this is the one chance to get time alone away from the others so we can have all kinds of fun. Though we can still have plenty of fun rn” and then he calls them closer and the screen fades to black :) It later opens to screams being heard from inside the house somewhere.

[thosch3i]

Fic Writer Interview Game

was tagged by @extraordinarilyextreme <3 thank you so much! was out all day and only got around to this now lol

name: emmy/thosch3i whatever u wanna call me, it’s all good lol

fandoms: currently, only dmbj but previously also zhenhun. most of my fics on my ao3 are still weilan but maybe one day i’ll kick my ass into gear and write more pingxie LOL.

two-shots: ......I only write one-shots i’m sorry LOL

most popular multi-chapter fic: ............i really do only have one-shots man im sorry. most popular fic in general is going viral, at 840 kudos. shen wei vs technology in covid-era online classes lol. glad all 840 of you were coping with this pandemic well(?????)

actual worst part of writing: getting ideas from brain onto paper. talking about fun angsty ideas in dms? awesome! actually writing them? uhhhhhhhhhhh [sweats] also lol finding time to write. i feel like i never have time these days but maybe my time management is just...terrible.

how you choose your titles: i write the entire fic and then panic throw a random line that sounds vaguely related as the title. idk what im doing, ever, dont ask me things. *lies down*

do you outline?: usually yeah. most of the time my writing goes horribly south from the actual outline anyway though. (everything’s fine folks i promise--) though sometimes for short fics i’ll just have a general idea and start typing. and then it turns into like 15k words and i despair

ideas you probably won’t get around to, but wouldn’t it be nice?: all of my old weilan fics lol. i had a huge 20k outline for a weilan x dbh crossover with android shen wei and Plot and Twists and Betrayal and Revelations and whatnot and honestly i was rly hyped to write it, i got 50k for nanowrimo two years ago but ehhhh i just dont have the brain for guardian anymore....im only capable of fixating on one fandom at a time. looking through my guardian wips i also have multiple other soulmate AUs, a literal ghost!sw + human!zyl AU with a whole other plot, urban fantasy demon!sw + human(?)zyl again with....more plot. lol i give up on life *shrugs*

callouts @ me: write faster and also read more fics in english instead of chinese because you’re forgetting how the english language works at this point, dumbass

best writing traits: i legit do not know. descriptions? fluff? pining? lol help

spicy tangential opinion: hmmm...mainly, i dont read much eng dmbj fanfic bc i dont vibe with most popular eng fandom fanon/characterization, sorry 😅 uhhhhh i also really hate it when people forget that xg & pz have their own friendship and relationship independent of wx......pz tends to bring out xg’s playful side at times, which un showed w their last couple eps and also there’s a novel extra where xg pranks pz (&wx but mostly pz bc wx sees through it p quickly) with a fake zombie turtle and it’s rly cute lol. anyway t3j’s relationship is the heart of dmbj and it can’t be intruded upon or broken up by others, esp by chongqi/rain village. uhhhh another spicy opinion: i vastly prefer huaxiu to hei///hua, sorry guys orz i blame tlt2...huaxiu are too cute ;;;;;; anyway ill stop there before the entire dmbj tumblr fandom blocks me LOL. (i also have too many Opinions(tm) about characterization.)

but anyway, so like im definitely a cranky judgy bastard at times, but in the end fanfic is fanfic so u can write whatever ooc crackship crack premise stuff you want, have fun with it. i certainly do too. as long as you’re having fun then that’s all that matters. tangentially related, dramas don’t have to be Objectively Good/Amazing or anything for you to like them. i definitely have very strong opinions on dmbj adaptations for example re: how they respect the novel and characterization of t3j especially, but they all have their own problems....(some far more serious than others). i could write an essay about that but i wont, to save your eyes LOL. 

(i mean at the end of the day i unironically love time raiders and that is like an objectively terrible movie.)

tagging: im so inactive on tumblr im sorry idk anyone anymore. i think lots of dmbj writers have already been tagged but also i dont read much dmbj fanfic so im not sure who else there is OTL @laireshi ik u already got tagged but if u choose to do this i wanna see :D otherwise if you’re a fic writer and you see this please feel free to tag yourself~

EDIT: im a clown sorry laire just saw u already did it lmaoooo

[ibelonginthepast]

okay I need your klance fic recs(i feel like you have really good taste)(i mean your icon is literally THE keith of course you have god tier taste)

okay so the thing is.. that when i say am kinda messed up and disgusting sometimes... and becoming a madwoman... am not over exaggerating or saying it in a funky way.. i actually am getting like that .. and that's how i got into the klance fandom initially. i project through lance and read really langsty fics.. and they are messed messed with like violent nsfw, gore, horror, serious mental health issues etc? so if u want those... i'll only send them if u want?

yeah tho i entered with this thingy that klance is gonna be like my guilty pleasure or some shit but them i inevitably fell in love with some GORGEOUS fanfictions out there and KEITH KOGANE in all shapes sizes genders and ages so lol...

but they aren't flowery. that's just not my taste. Some of them might be "problematic"? it's in quotes because i don't agree with it. it's not going to be problematic in plain ignorant sense like racial issues or blatant sexism or mental abuse.... but they might have like stuff which people dont always agree with like drugs. most of them would have nsfw it's just something that i need to have for feels and that's why i asked if u minded it. some things are like more subjective,, characterizations for example, cause like some people dont think keith is a skirt guy cause he isnt in fashion but i think he is petty and rebellious so he will defo do that? some of them would have like physical fights and stuff.. or keith and lance being mean to each other.. some ugly habits which aren't necessarily condemned like anger or drugs.? but with how i see it, it's not glorified, so i see them as human. i love the raw and ugly in these or idk its just human to me (but some people dont like which is completely valid cause we are all different from different environments and think different and resonate with different stuff.)

wait addition: i think some of them will have sexist themes? which i have complained about a lot before. i dont know why authors feel the need to somehow put women down to show how a mlm relationship without any women is superior or some shit it's annoying as fuck i hate it. i dont think i would have any especially sexist fics here, but there might be some with lowkey themes and bad handling of those issues. some of them mau have that subtext of disgusting heteronormative standards, but in subtext uk like bottom lance having a small waist and being giggly and all in contrast to big bulk keith.

here are some that i had bookmarked... but i may remember some more and then send them to u and or add them here...

a heads up.. i dont remember all of them very well. its been a while and i read fanfictions A LOT so yeah.. incase one slips up here which isnt very good am sorry dont judge me

the bold ones are the ones u should really check out if our taste is similar.

to begin with plain f l u f f,, my first klance bookmark was How Could I Say No? by Padfoots_Pawprint. tws for violence, bullying, injury BUT it's not actually gory or something like that it's just keith being keith and getting hurt and lance helping my boi like he should. it made me feeeeeeeel ksksk

this was one that kinda really touched me,, Wasted youth, Cryptids, and Waterboys by Baea THIS HAS EXPLICIT NSFW in it, the first chapter kicks off with it.. its a good fuck buddies to lovers in my opinion.. i love the writing style, the choice of how it's just a couple entries of random days in their lives. i love keith's characterization.. he is a hobo and a conspiracy nerd.. i love how down for him lance is, very dedicated. i love their growth.. i love how they help each other grow,, and it's so like real and usual day to day and human and down to earth idk how else to express it. this is INCOMPLETE. it's 12 chapters and discontinued as of now,, but it's not a deadly cliffhanger

similar in style and approach to the above. tho i think here is where it gets dubious. Easy, Tiger. by @/WhatTheBodyGraspsNot ... this is INCOMPLETE too and as of now discontinued. this has that sorta murky vibe with it's drug usage, them being teenagers in school and engaging in stuff like this, bad boy keith and all. this has nsfw too. i just remember really liking it and its very raw and unfiltered. tho it's incomplete it's not an open ending for now.

okay so i am restarting this but am upset as fuck that it all got deleted so i am gonna be lazy and not put as much effort as i did.

i have also Crowd Pleaser bookmarked by the same author,, this one's complete and it has some serious issues around gaslighting if i remember correctly... i really liked it then. keith is literally an angel here, i want to kidnap him and marry him literally. the s h w ee t e s t shit ,, and i like how lance gives him all the support and space to get his shit together

Drummer boy by klancekorner,, i think it's similar to the prev one, but lance's pov(which is what i prefer ngl). this authors fanfics are all just wholesome. i had put links to all their fics before, but imma now just say that u should go and check all their fics out. i have them all bookmarked, i must have seen something in them (can't remember what now tho and i cant be bothered to skim through them like last time *rolls eyes*)

War of hearts? idk why honestly, just ik keira has made me gay, and lesbian rejection angst? garrison? yes :) it's incomplete, conveniently left at the point where lance's heart is broken lol

Fuck buddies with benefits. THE NAME IS BAD I KNOW but i just love the idea of a dedicated mess of a keith and lance taking care of him. that's it that's the fic if i remember correctly. oh wait yeah u might think keith is not treating lance right, but i think it's fine if lance is treated a bit stupid. this is a bit too sex driven tho i dont like it but just SLEEPDEPRIVED KEITH TO TAKE CARE OF IMMA SIGN UP (ik this maybe coming off toxic but lol look at me)

Rambling: THIS WAS ME.

Last Defense: TW SUICIDE this is literally the langst i have for canon lance

I want something else: bad boy keith can break my limbs and cut my face and i will thank him

A thank you would be nice: keira damn

game-set-match: b a d b o y

I swear to go the devil made me do it: my typically fav trop, hardcore pining lance, literally perfect angsty keith. very similar to the top ones ig? idk also this one is one of my comparatively recent sane bookmarks so that's something. it starts off weird, u think it gon be subtly sexist but it turns out better so hold on

you've got me locked up: i think it's delinquent keith,, its floofy

Dad lance and tattoo artist keith: the name says it

damn while going through my bookmarks i realized that there are a lot of things i never bookmarked? i am pretty sure i loved a lot of long fanfictions, flower shop aus and tattoo artists shit wtf-

wait here's one, it's not complete: Blood jumps in the sun: it's very heavy has a lot of growth and kinda wholesome,, tags and summary will give u an idea what u getting in.

The lessons we learned: can't remember much other than florist keith, sad keith, smart keith, really long, pining

damn i think i have a lot of happy ones i didn't bookmark cause my brain was like u dont deserve the serotonin :( i'll add if i have more)

some actually angsty, detailed nsfw and messy (according to the way u interpret these) ones... lemoninagin.. they have some very detailed and explicit nsfw stuff but i am not there for it. some of it has the kind of angst i like? an actual one that i love and they recently posted and the reason am putting them here is infinitesimal. best friends to lovers and tho usually it's not my cup of tea.. it's a character study, an interpretation of klance in a modern world i dare say,, which is very similar to mine. the thing about them is that i like their characterization a lot, and in no love in this, i like what kind of background stories they give to klance in their aus. i haven't read many by them, so if u want u can check them out.

i just realized i have put some lowkey sad/fucked fics here... i did remove 5 rn... i hope its all good damn why am i doing this i feel like am putting myself naked out there when i recommend my favs