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beannoss · 29 days ago

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with you, all in tangles (final)

3 times Yor blows kisses to Twilight and one time Twilight blows a kiss to Yor

For the @twiyorbase fluff fest! No content warnings, T-rating; manga spoilers. One chapter per day matching the daily prompts: and now complete! Today's prompt: always. <- Part three (+1)

It wasn’t the first party they’d hosted, but it was the first one where they’d rented a special space for it. Sharing director duties at WISE during a lasting peace afforded Twilight more time to genuinely relax. But of course, he would never choose genuinely relax doing this. Which was why the party was also a WISE operation. And Yor was aware of his target as they moved through the room.

Yor, on the other hand, still in her same role at City Hall and still in her same role with Garden, had taken on the planning duties for fun. And almost everyone she liked or loved was in attendance. Yor was having a great time! It also just so happened those same people were mostly the same people Twilight liked or loved, and so despite himself, Twilight also did seem to be enjoying himself.

Up until now. Yor had felt his change of mood the moment it happened, and quickly scanned the room. Oh, damnit! She thought Gorey had sent his regrets!

Then again, that man was unpredictable — wanting to curry Dr Loid Forger’s favour one moment and rejecting it the next. Judging by the way he was carrying himself, the retired former Chief Medical Director was intent on an evening for currying favour. Which meant bending Twilight’s ear with the most asinine prattle (Twilight's words) for so long he would end up lying in bed, pinching the bridge of his nose with one hand, rubbing his stomach with the other, grumbling to himself, until Yor came to bed, at which point he would move from lying against his pillow to resting his head in her lap as she read until he finally fell asleep.

But Yor — despite Gorey saying he would not be attending — had planned for this! She stole through the room, slipping easily between her guests, intercepting Gorey when he was feet away from Twilight. “Doctor Gorey! How lovely you were able to come in the end,” Yor said, stepping directly into his path. She clasped her hands in front of her, and gave him her biggest smile. “I was so sorry when we received your regrets, as I had actually actually planned to introduce you to someone this evening.”

“Mrs Forger,” Gorey greeted. He’d been trying — very rudely! — to look past her towards Twilight as she spoke, but at the mention of an introduction, he refocused. “I — well, yes my plans changed. And I thought I would see my good friend Loid —” She knew Twilight wasn’t openly listening but she also knew exactly what it felt like to have his focused attention: it had been steady from the moment she had started to move through the room. At Gorey’s casual familiarity, Twilight’s attention sharpened irritably, even as she could still hear him speaking pleasantly. Since he retired, he insists on calling me Loid, Twilight had said testily the last time this happened. At that point, Yor had put her book aside, and set her fingers to her husband’s temples, half listening as he went on and half formulating this exact plan.

“Ahh, Loid will very much want to see you,” Yor said apologetically. Lie, she sing-songed to herself. “But I really do need to introduce you. Oh, and the gentleman in question is just over here! He’s been keen to meet you ever since Loid sung your praises a few weeks ago. If you’ll come with me?”

Gorey made one more attempt to look past her — but Yor tipped her head, letting her hair fall to obscure his view. And it was clear he was very tempted by the prospect of flattery. “Well,” he finally said, puffing up his chest. “If you insist.”

“You’re doing me such a favour, Doctor Gorey,” Yor gushed.

As Gorey turned in the direction she indicated, Yor looked over her shoulder, meeting Twilight’s eyes. He didn’t smile outright, but she knew that slight curve to his lips, the way his eyes shone at her.

Quickly, before Gorey might notice, Yor winked, and blew him a kiss.

Like he had in the beginning — so adorable! — Twilight ducked his head ever so slightly, such that only she would notice, a faint flush touching his cheeks, before he turned his attention back to the people he was speaking with. Yor fell into step beside Gorey, feeling like she might be glowing just a little bit.

After Yor had set Gorey talking to a WISE agent she had roped into the ploy — with apologies! — Yor took a moment to survey the room. And if her eyes lingered on her husband —

“You two are still doing that, huh.”

Yor turned to Sylvia, who had come up beside her, wine glass in hand. “Hm?” Yor asked.

“I still remember when he came in to tell me you’d incorporated that gesture as something of a coded message into your field work.” Yor blinked at her, and Sylvia smiled — smiling regularly and openly was still new for her, and Yor always warmed to see it. It was very clear that retirement was treating her well, even if she had banned any congratulations under threat of unleashing her worst (although Yor had heard rumour that Nightfall had taken Sylvia on a beach holiday). But she knew Twilight had been worried about what she might do with herself: Yor would have to tell him later on how well she looked. Sylvia indicated Twilight across the room with a tip of her glass. “That was when I knew.”

“Knew? What did you know?”

What Sylvia hadn't lost was a tendency for speaking in riddles. At least that's what it sometimes felt like to Yor: as though she were missing half the context and had to piece everything together through obscure clues. She supposed that's what happened if one spent most of their life in espionage. Her eyes flicked to Twilight again: Anya was looking conspiratorial beside him and something she said made him laugh. Involuntarily, Yor smiled, swayed a little towards them.

Or, she corrected, losing one's smile was what happened if one spent most of their life in espionage, without the benefit of a confidante outside of that life. Although, she supposed she was really more beside that life, than outside of it. But still!

“In his earliest honeypot missions,” Sylvia answered (hopefully), “I’d have to coach him through doing the romantic things. Wine, flowers,” Sylvia waved a hand, “The cliches that are usually good enough early on in a courtship. Later, longer assignments might require he have more nuance, gifts more specifically tailored to his targets,”Sylvia slid a sly glance to Yor at this, and despite herself, Yor felt herself blush. Twilight treating Yor as he would a target had never really worked as planned. “But for the work he was doing at that point in his career, barely more than a rookie, the cliches would typically have been fine. Except he was terrible at them. At almost everything else, he was exemplary, almost annoyingly so, honestly. But he struggled with the…” Sylvia swirled the wine in her glass as she considered. “The softer? Squishier? Things.”

“Lovey-dovey,” Yor suggested softly, remembering.

Sylvia cut her another glance. Her smile was a little knowing. “Sure. Lovey-dovey. He would under-do it to the point it would risk the mission and I’d have to step in to force the issue.” She shook her head, took a sip of her drink. “He got better at it obviously. Though he still tended to rely on charm and other tactics where possible... Then he appeared one day, shortly after you two began joint field work. Reported to me about a new coded message: you'd started blowing kisses to one another.” That surprised Yor a little, though it shouldn’t have. Sylvia says shortly after we started working together but… I wonder when exactly it actually was… Knowing Twilight, it could easily have been after the first time, in anticipation. But it may also not have been until after they’d shared their feelings with one another. Or that first time Yor had been aware that Twilight had come close to death. Or the first time Twilight had been aware of Yor coming close to death… A dozen other possibilities came to mind. She would ask him. Sylvia went on, “I didn't need details, I didn't need to pry; he was our best. He knew that and so did I. But I asked him to clarify. What did it mean? When and why and under what contexts could blowing kisses work in the field?” Sylvia laughed. “When I tell you he gave me the stormiest look — insofar as he emoted outwardly at all. I hadn't seen even the shadow of an expression like that since the earliest days of his training.”

Yor smiled a little. “He couldn't say what it meant?”

“What he managed to describe was nearly nonsense. He essentially told me that it meant: This or that, depending on context, depending on mission. You two just understood. That was enough, leave it alone.” Sylvia shook her head. “And that's why I knew. Because he was a master of communication, verbal, non-verbal, subtle gestures, doublespeak, whatever a mission called for or an ally needed. But he also valued precision. A specific gesture that meant different things nearly every time it was used? That's sloppy. That's risky.” Sylvia's amusement deepened, her eyebrow raised pointedly. “Unless, of course, there's an intimacy there, which all but mitigated the risk.”

“Hmm…” Yor raised a hand to her chin, looked across the room to where Twilight was listening intently to Becky. Becky had long shed her crush on Twilight, but she still liked to ask his opinion on things. In much the same way she still met with Yor to brush up on her self-defence skills whenever she was back in Berlint from university. It was sweet. Yor smiled slightly.

He felt her gaze; of course he did. It was only a flicker, his eyes darting to meet Yor's. It was enough.

Sylvia had it wrong. Yor understood exactly what Twilight hadn't said — there really was only one meaning. She would ask him, later, why he wasn't more specific with Sylvia. Had he not known then? Or had he not anticipated her probe? Had he wanted to keep it personal, even back then, when he had thought he couldn't have anything personal? Something else? Yor had her suspicions.

Standing beside Sylvia, remembering Twilight at that time, she could see the logic of his deflection. She supposed one could say that the meaning differed a little, after all, the context resulted in courses of action specific to the where and the when and the why. But at the end of the day, through the dozens (or hundreds? She would ask Twilight later; he would remember) of times they blew kisses to one another, in missions and in life, the meaning really was always just the same.

Don't worry. I have this. I have you. Trust me.

Or, she supposed there was one progression… It really hadn't been too long before it had really meant

Trust us.

All at once, she felt too far away. Yor turned her attention back to Sylvia, smiled brightly. She had learned something of deflection, too, over the years. “Thank you for sharing that with me,” she said sincerely. “And I suppose… I suppose it was something that just... worked. We didn’t really explain it to ourselves, either.”

Sylvia gave her a long, searching look. “Heh,” she murmured, looking into her glass before downing the last sip. “So he's taught you a few tricks then.” Yor felt her eyes widen and Sylvia laughed. “Go on, I can see you want to go to him.”

Once upon a time, Yor might have felt embarrassed, for her feelings, for being so obvious, for being a little rude in being so obvious. But what was the point? Sylvia was a good friend; they were surrounded by good friends or people they trusted well enough. Well, except for Doctor Gorey and the target of WISE's operation. But both of them were presently and thoroughly engaged, and no worry of hers.

She let her affection for Sylvia shine through on her face. Just as Sylvia's eyebrows rose a fraction in surprise — hehe! Success! — Yor winked.

Then she crossed the room, stepped lightly into place beside Twilight. His arm came around her before he even turned to her. Yor took the moment to smile in greeting to Anya and Becky, then slid her arm around his waist in turn. When he looked down at her, she beamed up at him.

“Hi, love,” Twilight murmured, handsome as ever with some grey at the temples and a few lines at the corners of his eyes. His beloved eyes, warm and smiling with welcome. There was a question there, about Sylvia, about Gorey, but she would tell him about that later.

“Hi!” Yor chirped. And — ignoring how Anya said Eugh! Mama! — she rose to her toes, gave a quick peck to the edge of his mouth.

At his raised eyebrows when she dropped back down to her heels, Yor winked, and blew him a kiss.

Thank you for reading & I hope you enjoyed 😘

#twiyorfluffweekend #twiyor #spy x family #spy family #spy x family fic #flash fic #here fandom take this!#don't think too hard about the spy logic here ok

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aoharushiyo · 5 months ago

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the recipes for... | track 3 ― chocolate ganache

Translation: en Proofreading: aca, dimi, kimi, myun, jay, jelly

Content Warning: fire and fire-related injuries

Years ago, when I was still a child... There was a time where I 'loved' everything the world had to offer.

Years ago, when I was still a child… There was a time where I 'loved' everything the world had to offer.

I still remember the kitchen of the house I lived in as a kid. That day, while my mother was making curry, I ran into the kitchen and jumped on her back while she was hunched over the stove. Putting on a pleading face, I made myself look as if I was on the verge of tears.

"Mama~! Big Sis is bullying me!" "Hm?" My mother turned around, a perplexed smile on her face. "That won't do. You've got to be a good sister and not bully your little brother."

At the entrance of the kitchen, my sister's mouth sharpened into a pout as she started to complain. "But Ushio wants my sweets! He should eat his share! These are mine!" "Mamaaaa~ Big Sis is a bullyyyy!" "Oh, don't cry, Ushio! How about this? I'll buy cookies for you later." "Really!?"

"Ugh, Mom, you spoil Ushio too much. If you just give him what he wants every time he cries, he won't grow up into a proper adult!" "Mamaaaa, Sis is being meaaaaaaaan!" "Now, don't talk like that to your brother."

I wouldn’t say all of it, but if I had to guess, I'd say at least part of my personality was inherited from my sister. She was always strong-willed and overflowing with sarcasm, and she would always bully me, but…

"Oi, Ushio. Come here." "Why…?" "I'll give you a little. Just a little, okay? 'Cause it's annoying when you're crying like that."

―Because I loved my sister, who actually was kind underneath her words, I guess I did end up a little bit similar to her.

"Making dinner this early?"

At that point, my father entered the kitchen, craning his head towards the pot on the stove. He must've been enticed by the fragrance of the curry.

"I have archery practice today, so once I've finished cooking, I'll take Ushio to the dojo with me." "Alright. But is it super spicy again today? Papa's stomach hasn't been great recently…" "Well, if it's not spicy, then is it really curry?"

Hearing that, my father burst into laughter, and my mother's laughter soon joined his. I loved my carefree, kind father, and his constant laughter, too.

"Alright, it's done. Let's get going, Ushio! While Mom is practicing, you can play with Muneuji-kun!"

The archery dojo that my mother had taken me to since I was a baby ― that too, was something I loved.

---

Once a week, the archery dojo Muu-chan's family ran would hold a class for the general public. My mother had been one of the students of that class, and she had almost reached a level where she could participate in tournaments. The teacher of the class was Muu-chan's mother, and so, as mothers of around the same age, even I could tell that they were good friends.

"Good afternoon! Let's have a good lesson today!" "Welcome, Kurama-san. Let's have a good lesson, shall we?" "Here, this is for you! We're having super spicy curry again today, but I made too much as usual, so do take some…" "Oh my, thank you~! You don't know how much I love your super spicy curry. Next time we make it, you should take some of our extra-sweet stew home with you." "Really? You're too kind!" "Fufu. Now then, shall we begin?"

The sound of the arrows hitting the target was always so cool, so I loved waiting for my mother's practice to finish.

"Uu-chan." "Ah! Hi, Muu-chan!" "Good afternoon. Let's play wrestling again today?" "Yeah, let's!"

Wrestling with Muu-chan while we waited was fun, so I loved that, too. But what I loved the most was―

"Sorry I made you wait so long, Ushio! I'm done now, so let's go home." "Mama!" "Ahaha, if you squeeze me so tightly I'll forget how to breathe, you know? There, there."

―Getting tightly hugged and squeezed by my mother and burying myself into her soft, marshmallow-like body.

"See you, Uu-chan." "See you, Muu-chan!"

―Shaking hands with Muu-chan and promising to come back and play next time.

"Good practice today, Kurama-san. See you later, Ushio-kun."

―Having my head patted.

―Being touched. Touching. All of it.

Even though I loved it so much…

---

That very night… I couldn't sleep. I couldn't breathe. It was so hot. When I opened my eyes, all I could see around me were flames.

I called for my mother and my father and my sister, but they didn't reply at all.

And, just as my consciousness was fading away, I was found by rescuers.

"I have a young boy of about 5 years old with me! He has burns sustained to his whole body, consciousness level 2…! Requesting emergency transport!"

They were making fun of the pain I was in. It felt like every inch of my body was being burned to a crisp.

"How awful… he'll need a full-body skin transplant."

Faintly, I heard the faraway voices of the rescuers speaking.

"How are his parents and sister looking!?"

I wanted to see them. Dad, Mom, Sis…

"Unfortunately… we couldn't save them."

In that moment, I realised that I would never see them again.

---

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#en tl #series: 18trip #(weakly grinning) angst #literally everything before this was the calm before the storm #btw yes the text in the novel is actually red!

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six-white-venus · 11 months ago

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if you ever see him, there is just one thing you would like to ask him:

how do i forgive?

because you've been trying, lord knows you have. it's been a year. he never loved you. it's as easy as that. why can't it be as easy as that?

you recently came across a letter you wrote him after he left, one where you're begging him to come back. you tore the paper copy into shreds a long time ago, but this one must have escaped your notice. you remember his response to the message. a thumbs-up emoji.

"whose name will i call, a thousand times over?" it said, "who will I call my love, my love, my love- exasperated, scandalised, laughing? who will I call?"

it's been a year and you know the answer to that question, more or less. no one. you will call no one. you will sit and stare at the paint peeling off your wall, that ugly, powdery blue that has started making your skin crawl. you will sit on the cold kitchen floor till your mom pulls you to your feet and brings you tea. you will call no one. you will make yourself forget.

except, it's not that easy.

he pops up in every mundane aspect of your life. the other day you found a keychain you bought him a month before his birthday, a month before he left you. you give it to someone else because why waste money? it's not like he lives in it.

(but he does, he does, he does.)

he is dating someone you used to know. you don't care. you want to throw up. you just want to ask: how do I forget?

a friend recently asked you, "do you think you had a savior complex, when it came to him?" you said you didn't, but maybe that's not the whole truth. maybe you did have some sort of twisted need to save him in every single way possible just so that he'll love you.

i would help you stitch yourself up. i swear i won't scream when you gut me like a fish. i will feed you soup and keep you warm. i won't sob when you knock my portion to the floor. you bleed. i do, too. no, you're right. i don't bleed as you do. I'll never understand. i am so sorry. i love you. do you love me?

after a week, you receive two texts:

lol kys ily <3

you are so happy you could sob.

he does none of this now, apparently. he smiles instead of smirking. he cradles things. he tends to wounds. he calls her baby. he says, "I love you so much." the whole thing, all spelled out. how crazy is that?

and you just want to ask: how do I stop caring?

he always held you between his teeth. there was nothing gentle about it. the bite marks on the back of your neck still hurt and you could swear it still bleeds. your mom says you're imagining it. you must be.

but here's the thing! you have people who hold you in their arms now. they are so gentle, so careful with you. you didn't cry, not once, under the clutch of his canines but now in their arms, all you do is cry. it's so strange. and you really are happy. it's so much better than what it used to be. you wake up and he's not the first thing you think of, not anymore. you dream that he apologises to you (you forgive him every single time). you go to therapy. you don't remember the last time you cried over him. you are loved, but not by him. you never were.

it doesn't matter, because you know what love feels like now. it is popcorn and nacho cheddar cheese seasoning and mutton curry. it tastes like tea and chips in an orange package and instant noodles you made with your best friend the day before she left for college. you know love now. you know happiness.

but in moments like these, you can't stop yourself from thinking that if you see him again, you would like to ask him one last thing:

how do you stop missing being held between one's teeth?

#my writing #prose poetry #words #writeblr #heartbreak #how does one move on when there was never a proper end?#when there wasn't even a beginning?#inspired by that one inkskinned poem

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ladytesla · 10 months ago

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The Great Faerun Baking Show (part three)

For those of you who are just stopping by, I had a horrible idea a while ago and this is the result. I have no idea what's going to happen or who's going to win. I’m just going to roll a D20 ‘bake check’ for everyone and write out the results, including what everyone rolled so y’all know I’m not cheating just so my druid boyfriend can win. The person with the lowest total score (out of a possible score of 60) goes home.

We've got the main 6 companions, Jaheira, Halsin, Minsc (and Boo), Minthara, Dammon, and my tav Medora (who y'all can just pretend is Alfira if you don't want someone else's tav in the story, since they're both female bards)

Week One, Cake Week: Star baker was Karlach, Minthara went home

Week Two, Biscuit Week: Star baker was Halsin, Shadowheart went home

Week Three: Bread Week, or "No you can't use Mage Hand to knead your dough"

Signature: Cottage Loaf

Astarion: Sun dried tomato and paprika. Unfortunately somehow he never turned on his oven, so all he had when time was called was a big ball of dough that wasn't able to be judged.

Dammon: Greek spices and olives. Or whatever the Faerun equivalent of Greece is. Maybe Waterdeep? Anyway, there were a few too many olives and it was a little underbaked, but it wasn't too bad.

Gale: He really wanted to keep with a magical purple theme, but ube and red onion really don't vibe with each other. It was way overworked thanks to the mage hand he totally didn't use to help with the kneading process.

Halsin: Rosemary and wild mushroom. All of which he'd gathered himself, of course. Nearly perfectly done, and beautifully decorated with little sprigs of rosemary.

Jaheira: Cinnamon pumpkin bread. Very autumnal, but the moisture in the pumpkin threw off the consistency of the dough and left it underprooved. The decorative pumpkin seeds on top could only hide so many sins.

Karlach: Jalapeño cheddar. Just the right amount of heat, from someone who's an expert on it. She even decorated it with a few slices of jalapeño for presentation.

Lae'zel: For some reason she decided to put smoked salmon, herring and tuna in the same bread to make a fish loaf? It was also underbaked, and didn't go over well at all.

Medora: Saffron, rose and pistachio bread. The rose was a bit too overpowering, and the loaf was overworked. It looked nice, though.

Minsc: He used Indian spices in his bread like garam masala and curry powder, which gave it a really unique flavor. It was slightly overprooved, but overall a successful loaf.

Wyll: Gluten-free garlic and herb. He wanted to challenge himself to make a classic flavor more available to those with dietary restrictions (because he is a Very Good Boy) and it was a resounding success. He earned a Hollywood Handshake for his efforts.

Technical: Baguettes

I was surprised to find that the lowest roll for this round was an 8! So they all did pretty well. I think that, from now on, if there's a tie I'll roll for them a second time. The second roll won't contribute to the score at all, it'll just determine the order in the technical.

Worst to best:

10. Halsin

9. Dammon

8. Astarion

7. Karlach

6. Minsc

5. Jaheira

4. Lae'zel

3. Wyll

2. Medora

Gale

Showstopper: Bread Sculpture

Astarion: He recovered from his disastrous signature round to make a masterfully-done sculpture... of himself, with a dagger in one hand and a glass of wine in another. He had to reference the face from a sketch someone had made of him, but thankfully it had been a skilled artist. Paul and Prue had to look really hard to find a flaw.

Dammon: He made a bread dinosaur. A stegosaurus, to be exact. And thanks to its sturdy bread-roll legs, it was able to stand upright unaided. The tip of the tail got a bit burnt, and to save it he'd had to take it out of the oven underbaked.

Gale: He made Elminster's hat, and colored the bread with paprika and cayenne to get the red color. It ended up being quite lopsided, unfortunately, and overworked.

Halsin: His owlbear was incredibly detailed, and the garlic chip decorations he used for some of the feathers accented the flavor of the bread wonderfully. Some of the chips had browned a bit too much on the ends however, so it wasn't perfect, but it was close.

Jaheira: She had a rough time this round. Dropped one of her doughs so she only had two to work with and underbaked her sculpture of a tree so badly that it had to be propped up to stand upright.

Karlach: She made a tower of bread skulls, with one of four different flavors. And tiny grassini breadsticks to represent swords and spears. A mammoth undertaking that she pulled off very well.

Lae'zel: Unhappy about her gingerbread dragon, she was bound and determined to make a dragon right this time. And thankfully, she succeeded. Otherwise she would have continued to make dragons until she got it right. The bread was quite spicy and had chili peppers in it for good measure, but the heat wasn't overpowering at all.

Medora: She attempted to make a lighthouse on an island. It was really precariously tilted to one side, and the bread making the lighthouse was underbaked, but the bread the island was made of tasted fine.

Minsc: He made a giant bread version of Boo the Miniature Giant Space Hamster. Which he presented next to the real thing. It was a huge loaf of bread so it was underbaked in the middle, but it was visually impressive.

Wyll: His bread version of the Ravenguard family crest had a braided border which took a lot of time. However, with the added colors in the dough to bring the crest to life, Wyll was still able to make something delicious and very nicely baked within the time constraints.

The Results:

Our star baker for the week, with a score of 52/60, is Wyll!

Unfortunately, with a score of 23/60, Jaheira has to leave the tent.

Feel free to play along in the comments! How would your tav or favorite npc compare?

Let's fuckin go we're doing pies and tarts next.

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murdleandmarot · 6 months ago

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hello!! for that ask game, 3 and 17? :D

hi hello!!!! I already answered 17, so I’ll just talk about a couple of my favorite movies :)))

1. The Secret of Moonacre (2009)

Jesus Christ I love this movie. It’s based on a book that is bad, but it was made into a movie that is my favorite thing in the world, me and my sister watch it ALL the time.

There’s just so much to love about it. It’s a fantastical movie that I don’t want to spoil, but it’s got magic, it’s got 2008 CGI, it’s got fairytale worlds, it’s got so many queer undertones that it’s insane, it’s got historically inaccurate but stunning costumes, sets and scenery to DIE for, some of my favorite scenes in movie history just for the whimsy of it all, and Tim Curry.

The main character Maria is LITERALLY just me, and very Jemima coded, and you’ll see why if you watch the movie, I cannot recommend it enough. Someday I should do fanart

And it’s got this gayass mcr teenage guyfailure silly boy with eyeliner who my sister clocked as gay the MINUTE he walked on screen.

(Why do people keep doing that to me. First with this, then my friend with Misto (HOW DID HE DO THAT??? IT WAS THE FIRST LINE!!!))

2. Clue (1985) and Glass Onion (2022)

I LOVE detective and crime movies that are focused on shenanigans, aesthetics, and actually SOLVING the crimes. So much of true crime to me is just ‘and then the violent and misogyny person ate 8 children 😔’ like okay. Thank you.

I actually can’t stand it and that’s why I like murder mysteries more than thrillers.

Clue is hysterical and has shaped my humor to an insane degree, my dad and I quote it each other all of the time. The murder mystery element is incomprehensible but the shenanigans are so good that you don’t even notice the entire movie is nonsense until the end. 10/10 no notes.

Glass Onion is a masterpiece. Eat the rich <3. Also they should keep making Knives Out movies forever.

3. Wait Till Helen Comes (2016) and Bluebeard (2009)

OBSCURE INDIE FILM GIRLIES UNTIE!!! I’m a huge fan of movies that are spooky, but not horror, and these movies delivers on both accounts, at least for me. Also they’re free on YouTube :))) double win!!!!

WTHC was one of my FAVORITE books as a kid, (alongside like. Dork diaries and Frozen Charlotte), so when I saw it was a movie on YouTube I lost my mind. Watched it in the middle of the night at my great-aunts house while writing horror fanfiction. Truly the teenage dream.

It’s SO crazy to me, atmospheric, makes almost no sense, but is still one of my favorites.

Bluebeard is Bluebeard :)) so so good, in French, watched it for the first time about two weeks ago? And my computer started screaming at me. Like actual screams. Super creepy. I love the acting, I love the ambiguous ending that is SUPER dark and abstract. What was going on there. I love it.

#this turned out SO long I’m so sorry #erm anyway honorable mentions go to Haunted Mansion (2023) the main character Ben is SO gorgeous sir PLEASE.#The Storyteller and Murder on the Orient Express (2017)#Cats (1998) and Jesus Christ Superstar (1973)#almost no Disney movies because from the ages 4-10 I despised movies and talking animals #which outlawed almost all of Disney but somehow Scooby doo escaped unscathed #ANYHOW thank you for asking about movies :))))) I could yap forever #technically I did more then three (not technically I quite literally did)#but bc I couldn’t answer one of the questions I felt like compensating #asks!!!!!!#not gonna tag any of these movies bc honestly no one cares 😭#but if any other mutuals know secret of Moonacre we will have a summer wedding

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problematicfanfics · 1 year ago

Text

Kinktober ‘22 Oct 3. Teacher/Student (WIP)

TOMBUR, 17!Tom 26!Wil, power imbalance, high school, drug use

no NSFW (yet)

lots of jumping around since it’s unfinished, ignore all errors

* ⋆★

Tommy wouldn’t necessarily call himself a good kid.

He would do his homework. He attended all of his classes. He’s averaged an A so far the entire year. So yes, by textbook definition, Tommy was a good kid.

1 Snapchat Notification: Anthony 🤯

“Right before p5 meet C hall bthrm”

“Bring cart Nathan feening 💀”

But he knew the only reason he ever made it through the day was thanks to his passing period restroom stops.

Anyone attending a “Western” high school can explain to you the ins and outs of the passing period bathroom breaks all the teens line up for. Each group eagerly awaits for a friend who has the supply.

And if you’re painfully unaware of the dark market being run in every bathroom stall, Tommy loves to explain it as a “social thing”. He’s just generally a better person like this. It’s an easy conversation starter, a fast in, a way to curry favor with more well-known kids in his school.

And he’s realized his grades have never been better.

Ever since he started smoking weed in his tenth year, he’s found he’s a rather studious smoker. His grades improved dramatically. Math seemed to make sense and he wasn’t struggling with anxiety from his testing. Stiff seats are easy to sit still in when your body finally relaxes. Class notes now fit smoothly in his brain between his knowledge of minecraft and song lyrics. Nothing negative seemed to be coming of his habits, despite the fear he gets from running in this little underground market. Passing a teacher in the halls can be a normal life versus permanent felony situation if they so much as ask to search his bag.

“…that fucking bitch doesn’t know her left from her right. Mate, I swear to God, she asked my chemistry teacher which one is which.”

Tommy chokes on the nicotine he’s hitting, lungs collapse into laughter. Promptly he erupts into a fit of coughing

“Yo, dude, get that checked out…” One of his friends in the stall next door said. “Ha, as if. Imagine being like… ‘Hey mum, my nicotine addiction might be affecting my health, mind if we take a look at it down at the ol’ doctor’s office?’”

The stalls laugh at the absurdity of ever revealing this secret to their parents.

Who cares if he’s started coughing from the metal shards when he laughs?

The day he truly understands he’s a functioning addict is when he makes his fifth stop in the C hall restrooms, waiting for his friend Jay while squatting on the toilet, as his other friend pretends to be doing “normal stall things” (as he puts it).

He knows the risks every time, six boys crammed into a stall to trade flavors and discuss about the girls they want and the bitches they hate, the snake “friends” who rat out others and the teachers they despise. He’s always ready to jump to shut everyone up when a teacher walks in. Sometimes, however, his guard falls.

Fifth period Tommy attends a US History class, something he had wanted to take since he saw it was an available course. His love for the subject, plus his new found study buddy, made the class a perfect choice in his mind.

Tommy didn’t mind attending the class. It had taken him upwards of three weeks to learn the teacher’s name (Mr. Gold, but the class called him Soot), and who he was (he was hired by the school three years ago and has been a teacher ever since), and his love life (he has a girlfriend, but all his classes found a picture of her on his instagram and they think he can do better).

He didn’t, however, have a hard time committing Soot’s appearance to memory.

His curly hair fell perfectly every day without a fail. The tight button up shirts he wore required him to roll up his sleeves if he ever wanted any relief from the room’s broken AC. It’s hard for Tommy to not follow his hands switching between the board and the lesson plan on his desk.

He’d be lying if he didn’t say he thinks that Mr. Gold was finer than the heavens. It seemed to be a popular debate in this girl’s restroom, too; was Mr. Gold hot or was it just the power dynamic?

As Tommy sits with his legs up between the railing and the wall, inhaling his cart like it was his life force in preparation for his fifth period class, he turns his phone for his friends to see. “You can’t tell me he isn’t hot!” He says as he gives the phone over to an equally contorted friend of his. “Gold? Tommy, you’re crazy. He isn’t that hot.”

“Listen I’m not gay but I’d be a victim. I’m just saying.” Tommy takes the phone back as he preheats the battery. One of his friends nods in agreement.

As the debate continues over the attractiveness levels of Wilbur's instagram posts, Tommy pulls up an old high school yearbook photo of the man. “You can’t say you wouldn’t want William Gold to fuck you, I honestly think I give this man fuck me eyes in class accidentally.” Tommy practically yells to prove his point to Aj.

Suddenly, a loud presence enters the bathroom.

“Ok, I know there’s more than one of you in there. Everybody out.”

The boys look around nervously to one another as Tommy holds back laughter. That is definitely Soot.

There is a tense pause. No one wants to respond out of fear of punishment (and slightly because he had to have overheard the conversation they were just having). “Guys, I’m not playing games here. Let’s go. We can take this to the head if we need.”

Quickly the boys hop down from their acrobatic positions and grab their backpacks.

“One, two, three of you!” Mr. Gold sighs at the sight. “Wow, no! There’s more! Five? SIX? There were six of you in there? My God it’s like a fucking clown car.”

The boys shift nervously under his look. “Listen, I don’t care. It’s just protocol. You’re lucky I’m not taking you down to the counselor, it smells like weed in here.” Everyone exchanges quick looks as they continue to try to hide the obvious vapes inside their hoodie sleeves.

“So you just… don’t care?” Tommy pipes up. His friends shoot him scathing looks, as if telling him to not push their luck and get out while they can.

Wilbur seems taken aback by the question. “Well, it’s not that I don’t care, it’s just… Listen, don’t say I’m letting you guys smoke in the stalls. I’m not. I just think you’re smart enough to not be dumb with it again.”

“But if you were truly concerned for our safety wouldn’t you confiscate our shit?”

“Listen, this is great energy Tommy, how about you keep it up in class and stop giving me fuck me eyes the entire period. I get you’re high but try a little harder.”

The entire bathroom goes silent before erupting into laughter. People with no business in the situation Tommy can hear snicker in the background.

“I’ll make sure to have you work for your money today.” Tommy says before Gold shrugs him off to prepare for his incoming class.

“I am so sorry you have to attend his class now.” Tommy’s buddy Nathan pats him on the back. “The sexual tension during lessons boutta go crazy” Aj jokes as he motions Tommy to head to class with him.

“I think I’m gonna be sick.” Tommy says as he sits in front of the classroom door with his head in his hands. “How do I look him in the eyes? I’ll just skip class by going to the nurse.”

Aj jumps in front of him before he can leave. “We’re already five minutes late. Please let’s just go in. The longer you wait the worse it gets and you know that.” Tommy reevaluated his choices before finally agreeing that Aj was, in fact, right, and that they should attend class.

“Tom Simons, nice of you to join us.” Soot singles him out in the middle of his lesson. Tommy’s equally guilty friend slips into the back of the classroom undetected. “Please, take a seat.” The sarcasm drips from his lips.

Tommy sits in his usual seat far in the back next to Aj. The work was boring mundane class stuff. They used their laptops to research the battles fought during the American Independence War and Tommy finished within the first three minutes.

Tommy raises his hand to gloat to his teacher, ready for the victory as he tells Soot his work is “too easy” and to “give him a challenge.”

“I’m done, easy shit.” Tommy says when Soot finally strolls his way over to the seat. He wasn’t prepared for Wilbur to lean over behind him to read, or the way he said “Good job, Tommy” as he got up (he can’t help but imagine him whispering “good boy” into his ear).

His eyes shoot up to meet Wilbur’s. Every quick retort he had loaded to fire falters. He feels like he needs to say something.

“Can I go to the bathroom?”

“Weren’t you just in there?” Soot makes a sarcastic sad face to mock Tommy’s surprised expression. “I remembered hearing a conversation about being a victim, if I’m not mistaken?”

Aj laughs as Tommy goes pale and forcefully chuckles. “Hey, haha, listen man, I-”

“Ok everyone, please discuss with the person next to you the notes you should have completed by now.” He redirects his attention back to the class, the low tone now projecting off the walls indicating he was referring to everyone.

Tommy turns to face his friend on his left. His shit eating grin left Tommy regretting his entire day.

“Can you send me the answers? I was too busy watching the in house entertainment”

About a week had passed since Tommy was caught, and he was being as careful as possible. Last thing he needed was another run in.

His fourth period lunch left quite a lot to be desired; in the mornings he was never hungry. Instead he fills himself with flavored air, weed, and a severely diluted once-iced coffee.

The lunch period only housed one friend every day, but on alternating days up to seven people would sit with them for lunch. Either way he was too high to notice anything happening around him. No difference was it to him if there was one or eight people, as long as he was being supplied the bodies didn’t matter.

These alternating days with a lot of people leads to everyone slowly making their way to the bathrooms after eating, using it as a pit stop and waiting out the remainder of their time.

Tommy had been waiting since 10:15, and the period ends at 10:30. He was finally getting his new cart today. For the last week he was either smoking scraps from all his empty carts at home or his friends’ at school. His “friend”/dealer had told him to wait in here but it was becoming ridiculous.

1 Snapchat Notification: Rizz 🤝

Rizz: “Soot’s on my ass but omw”

Tommy: “dude don’t come in here if Gold is gonna catch us.”

“he already doesn’t like me 💀”

Rizz: “Skill issue he doesn’t think i’m shady.”

“Or at least didnt before this.”

“Honestly Tommy i’d rather save my own ass and give u the shit before he catches me with 16 carts 💀 i’m dealing today i’m way overdue”

Tommy nervously taps his foot in the bathroom stall. He toys with the $50 in his pocket, rolling it up and flattening it. Honestly, he hates the way Rizz deals. His constant lateness, the sloppiness, as if he doesn’t care that this is something serious. This can be a crime if found out by the wrong person, and everyone will be in legal trouble. But to people like Rizz the real world doesn’t exist. The only reason Tommy continues to buy from him is because he gets a $15 discount (Tommy and Rizz’s cousin used to have a thing).

As he fumbles with the airbar in his hand he hears his “friend” walk in. “Open the stall door,” He knocks and Tommy unlocks it. “Here you fucking go.” He drops the cart in Tommy’s hand before opening his palm for the payment.

As he reaches for his pocket, the front bathroom door opens and the boys are sent jumping.

“What’re we doing here?” Gold asks the duo with his arms crossed. The door slams shut behind him.

“I’m paying him back for a meal he bought me last week,” Tommy explains as he gives the money to Rizz. “It was expensive.”

“I can tell. That’s a pretty big wad of cash. How much?”

“$50”

“And how much is a cart?”

“$65, so you can stop being weird about it now.”

“Ok, and so the constant going in and out of the bathrooms, Rizzario… is that just for fun or?”

He puts the money in his pocket. “It’s a pastime of mine. You should see the architecture up in here, truly stunning.”

“Yeah, I’m sure you get a kick out of it. Get to class.”

Tommy’s unfortunate second capture does not deter him from immediately smoking the cart with his friends minutes later in the same stall. He has been waiting for a week and he’ll be damned if he has to wait any longer. The lack of food in his system, along with his slightly reduced tolerance, makes walking to fifth period a little harder than usual.

Immediately upon sitting down it is revealed to Tommy by a kid sitting two seats ahead of him that there’s a test they are taking today and that he’s the only one who could “possibly forget about as big a test as this one.”, and he realizes he’s screwed up when even Aj is caught cramming at the last minute.

“Tommy, are you aware you failed my last test?”

“Yes Mr. Soot, I’m well aware. That’s actually why I wanted to talk to you today. I think I’m a pretty good kid. I do my work, I participate in class, and up until this point I have passed every test with flying colors. Please understand that I do try in this class and I’m not afraid to do extra work to get my grade back up. I’m not asking you to just change my score, I’m really wondering if there’s anything I can do to work for my grade.”

Soot turns to face Tommy, taking off his glasses and laughing. “A good kid? I’d hardly call you a good student.”

“What? Are you crazy? I actually do your work. I do more work than anyone else in any of your classes. I’ve never missed homework, or class work, or done poorly on a test before this. I always answer questions in class and respond when you try to have open discussions in class.”

“And yet, despite all that, you’re not a good student.”

“You’re mental!” Tommy exclaims. “Listen, if you don’t want to tell me where I can get extra credit in my grade, or if you just don’t want me to, then say it! I don’t want nonsense.”

Soot stands from his desk to address Tommy. The silence in the air hangs tight as the man evaluates his words. “You know you’re lying to yourself when you say you’re a good kid.” He finally says. “You know you come into class high every day, with barely any awareness. You babble off in group discussions for minutes on end, related to and not related to the topic. Your homework is subpar at best.”

“At least it’s done, man.”

“We’re not friends, Tommy.”

“Yeah, no shit, I know that. That’s why I came to you in person after class.”

“Mrs. Mark told me you resolve all your issues over email.”

Tommy’s mouth gets dry. Why’s he talking to Mrs. Mark about him? She never liked him much or his tryhard attitude in her stupid Advanced English Language class.

“Did she say I’m a bad kid? I swear she hates me. She’s always picking on me in class.”

“It’s honestly funny Tommy, because if you tried at all you could be such an exceptional student.” His demeanor shifts. Tommy can’t put his finger, but it seems like Gold has something he’s hiding. His mind instantly jumps to things Mrs. Mark could’ve told him. “Everyone keeps telling me that. Clearly it isn’t true if this is me trying.”

The tired teacher throws his hands in the air. “Once again! The lying! You’re so blind to it.” He walks back to his desk from the board for a final time. Throughout his speech he traces the wooden grain on his desk, eyes not leaving the boy’s. “Tommy, listen. You’re such a bright student. You’re wasting yourself with this crap. I know everyone knows you, I understand that you’ve gained quite a highly positive popularity status in this school when it comes to the social hierarchy. But if you just tried you’d see how much more you can do with yourself.”

“Forget it, Soot. I’ll just do better on the next one.”

“Maybe we’ll resolve this over email.” Gold writes out his number on a late pass before handing it to Tommy. “However, I am much more likely to respond over text.”

“No shot.” Kim says as she hands the money to the shopkeeper. “Strawberry Kiwi elf please, love.”

Tommy fumbles, laughing as he pulls out his phone “I swear! Look, it’s saved right here.” He shows her Gold’s contact on his phone, the only texts sent being a “hello” from each of them.

“Then let’s call him.”

“What?”

“If it’s really him, let’s call him. We’ll grab a coffee and walk down to the tracks and call him.” She grabs the box from the cashier. “Thanks, and can we also have…?”

“Cherry Cola Diamond please.” Tommy points to the wall. He reaches over the counter to grab it from the guy. “We can’t just call him. I feel so nervous. What if he’s actually just trying to get me in serious trouble? I mean, look at us.” He points around to the smoke shop they’re in. “This isn’t ok.”

Kim starts walking to the bin down the hall as she unboxes her new toy. “Listen babygirl. Everyone in the school wants that man. You should hear how people talk about him.” She ghosts the nic before dropping it in her cross body bag and strutting out the door, leaving Tommy to catch up. “Bag him, bitch.”

After much debate and argument, finally, at one pm on a saturday, after smoking a joint and walking on the train tracks, Tommy’s finger hovers over the call button.

“Kim, I can’t do it.”

“For christ’s sake,” She hits the button with his finger and puts it on speaker before shooting him an encouraging thumbs up.

As the line rings, Tommy seriously considers laying down on the tracks until the 1:30 pm train hits him.

Finally the line picks up.

The microphone shuffles up against some fabric before becoming clear. Soot’s groggy morning voice seems to burn through his ears.

“Hey, Tommy. Sorry I was sleeping. What’s up?”

He opens his eyes wide and shakes his head no to Kim, who just continues to nod her very adamant yes.

“What am I supposed to say?” He whispers to her.

“Hello?” Soot calls out confused.

“Ask him if he’s free to chat after school tuesday.” She says obviously as she rolls her eyes. Tommy just gives her an almost disgusted look back. “I can’t just… oh my god.” He redirects his voice to the phone. “Sorry, didn’t mean to wake you up.” Was all he could manage.

Gold chuckles slightly. “Don’t worry. I needed to wake up anyway to grade all the homeworks.”

“You’re seriously gonna be grading homeworks?”

“No. You caught me.” They both lightly laughed before realizing they seriously don’t know what to say. “Uhm, what are you doing?” Gold finally asks.

“I’m hanging with my friend Kim, we’re under an overpass by the train tracks.”

“You’ll have to show me one day.”

“It’s right across from the school, maybe I’ll show it to you one day during your break.”

Kim squeals through her hands and kicks her legs like a middle school girl watching her friend call their crush.

“Yeah sure, I’d like that… Listen I should probably get my day started so I’ll-”

“Oh yeah no now of course, I understand. I’ll see you on Monday.”

“Hope not, we don’t have school.”

“Ahaha, right. Forgot. Sorry, bye Soot.”

“Have fun Tommy,” Soot squeezes in before ending the call.

Tommy looks at Kim with a hatred in his eyes. “That was terrible.”

“…and then she made me call him!” Tommy explains his weekend to the morning bathroom bunch.

“You know Kim loves the drama. I wouldn’t be surprised if she’s telling everyone right now!”

“Forreal man, why’d you even tell her that shit?” Kim’s ex boyfriend speaks up. “Trust me, she’s a conniving little shit.”

“I’m like best friends with her twin sister Janie ok? The friendship extends to her. Also she asked me to get nic with her. I couldn't say no, she always pays for me. Everyone thank Kim for the free nic.”

“Thanks Kim”s were mumbled throughout the stall.

Aj shoved Tommy hard enough he falls off the wall. “What did you even say? You can’t end there.”

“I was a nervous wreck! He like woke up to pick up the call and his voice was so fucking hot guys. It caught me so off guard to hear it was like one pm, I don’t know why he was sleeping…”

Tommy spent the remainder of their ten minute morning smoke sesh to fill them in on everything that went down, as well as field questions from his friends.

He wouldn’t lie, he loved it.

Just like with weed, it seemed as though good things only came with getting involved with Gold.

He was putting in good words with all his teachers (including Mrs. Mark!), he was the shit in all of his classes, and everyone wanted to know what was going to happen next.

Gold, as well as the rest of the staff of course, were painfully unaware of the rampant “teacher and student” buzz circling around the smoke circles.

Since Tommy’s last little stint with Gold it’s been one week and three days. Nothing has changed, except for having the favor of every teacher he has a class in. He’s too nervous to take the first step into a possible slippery slope of relations with his teacher (as any normal person would be. But sadly, Tommy is not a normal person, not by a long shot, and he knows this as fact as he lays in bed wondering what it would be like to have Gold 6 inches deep in him)

It’s hard to go to school when everyone thinks you’re fucking the teacher. It was supposed to be a joke, the whole thing; Tommy always chooses one joke a year to be his running gag. He had chosen the gay joke “crush on my teacher” route because of how ludicrous the idea of him and a male teacher ever getting together was to him. It was a joke he often made about the old, prehistoric male teachers he had in ninth year, as well as some of the older women too, though most were married and he always thought it felt wrong to talk like that about them.

The weekend rolled around once more and Tommy spent his time out late at friend’s houses, and finally out until two am on Sunday night. He had begged his parents for hours and when they said yes he didn’t care about the consequences of his decisions.

Finally, reality caught up to Tommy, and for the first time since he first started drinking in eighth grade he wakes up with a hangover. Classes seem damn near impossible to stay awake for. He deems his sunglasses aren’t providing enough darkness and accessorizes with a hat from the lost and found bin, in hopes that now the fifth period fluorescent light combined with seeing Soot’s arms won’t make him vomit all over himself.

He strolls into class three minutes late due to having been kneeled over the side of the toilet in the single stall gender neutral bathrooms just minutes earlier. Apparently it’s clear to everyone in the class he’s a hot mess, because all he can hear is everyone asking him if he’s doing alright. He dismissed each one with a “Yeah, no, just tired. You know how school is.”

Before he knew it he was face down on his keyboard.

Tommy was awakened thirty minutes later to the sound of a bang next to him. Mr. Gold had lifted the entire desk combo before dropping it on the ground. “See me after class, Tommy.”

He could probably feel the smirk from Aj’s face even if he was on the other side of the world.

“Really? Falling asleep in class? That’s a new low, even for you.” Gold reprimands him. Tommy stayed. Yes, even he is surprised by it. Usually he’s the first one out the door if a teacher has an issue with him. But something in him almost wanted to hear what he had to say. He was excited for the man to tell him everything he did wrong, how to improve, what to do.

“I’m sorry Mr. Gold. It won’t happen again, I swear.”

They both looked at each other for a minute. “What is your sixth period class?”

“Gym. Such a bore, I hate my teacher so much. She’s so pregnant she can’t even stand near us because she’s scared someone’s gonna hit her.” The two laugh at the situation. “I mean, I can’t help but wonder why she doesn’t just go on maternity leave. Almost all the female gym teachers are pregnant this year.”

“Hey, they got a lot of free time over the summer. What else are they supposed to do?”

“They don’t have to keep fucking like rabbits!” He jokes and they laugh.

Silence once again falls over the room. It’s like something stops them from ever holding a conversation beyond some jokes. They’re too scared to laugh for too long, too scared of being too close, and Tommy’s way too nervous to actually make the first move. Everything relied on Soot.

“Call me Wilbur.”

“What?”

“You can call me Wilbur. William isn’t my first name. Well, it is, but I go by Wilbur.”

“Real quick let me just,” Tommy pulls out his phone from his back pocket and changes Wilbur’s contact name. “I like it. And here, we’ll take a selfie for the photo.”

Tommy turned around and extended his arm to get the two of them in the picture, snapping it before saving all changes. “I think this was a productive chat, Wilbur.”

“Don’t call me that in class or we’ll have issues,” He jokes around (but Tommy feels the difference in the weight of those words). Tommy mocks him before grabbing his bag and heading for the door. “Before you go,” Wilbur stops him just inches shy of the door. “Want to show me that underpass?”

Wilbur called Tommy’s gym teacher, making her aware that the boy was “making up a failed test” and would not be able to attend the period. The two sent off on their walk, Wilbur with his messenger bag and Tommy with some snacks he had in his locker.

Their destination wasn’t far away by any means, but the walk felt like forever as they desperately grasped at straws in order to make small talk.

“So you got a girlfriend?” Wilbur looks at the boy before pulling out his phone. “This is her,” he says, showing a photo of a skinny blonde woman, eyes green, teeth white. “Her name’s-”

“Jenine?”

“Please stop stalking my socials.” Wilbur jokes as he puts the phone away. “But yeah, Jenine. We actually- well, she, actually - decided we should go on a break about four days ago. Took all her shit out of the flat.”

Tommy was taken aback by the demise of their relationship. They seemed really happy from all the posts he saw. “Oh. I’m sorry to hear, man.”

The brunet smiled genuinely. “Nah, don’t worry. Just got more space to put all my useless shit in”

“Like what?”

“I dunno, figured I’d put up shelves to fill the big empty spaces and pile it with games or books or whatever a normal person puts on their shelves.”

“Well what does a non normal person put on their shelves?”

“Youtooz. Way too many to be healthy.”

“I won’t lie, I have a collection too.”

jump #1

Tommy sits on the freezing bathroom stall tile. It looks clean enough to sit on, and he hopes the wet feeling on the back of his leg is actually just his imagination. His bag is over in the corner and his jumper is blocking the awkward vent between the door and the floor that someone might be able to see him through.

The smell of marijuanna that has permeated into the walls of the gender neutral bathroom made his head spin. Tommy couldn’t help but feel slightly bad. What was supposed to be a bathroom for people became a smoke spot. However, it doesn’t stop him from pulling out the crack wire from his bag and hooking it up to his school computer.

He turns the cool glass over in his hands and traces the black mouthpiece. It was almost empty and he didn’t have another 50 to drop. As he places the wires in their appropriate spots he pulls out his phone.

The glass heats up and he takes a hit as he types out a message to his dear friend.

Wilbur (US HISTORY)

can i have a fifty

He knows he won’t respond. It was a dumb thought to even ask him, he fucked up the second he sent the text. Wilbur isn’t dumb. He’ll know it’s for a cart. There’s no way in hell he’d go as far as supplying the boy with drugs.

Wilbur (US HISTORY)

can i have a fifty

I’ll give it to you

after class, ok?

Tommy waits behind after class. Aj’s confused look as he walks out the door is all it takes for his stomach to get queasy again.

jump #2

“Tommy, do you know why I never wear these?”

Tommy, confused, replies no.

“I hate them. I like to think that if I just pretend I don’t need them my eyes will be able to see just fine again. Like a common cold, my eyes will just get over it. But that’s not true, obviously, as we know. You’re not a good student Tommy. You have some serious underlying issues that you’re just self medicating with weed and nicotine and adrenaline rushes. You try to trick yourself into thinking you’re a good student just like I try to trick myself into thinking I don’t need these.” He picks up the glasses before setting them back down. “I don’t know if you’re really all that ‘good’ of a student.”

“I do everything you ask!” Tommy yells. “I have literally done everything you’ve asked. Do you understand how stressful school was for me? Do you understand I had nearly no future in school before this? I was skipping my classes constantly to game and play with my friends. I couldn’t sit still or focus in class ever. Information never made sense. I have found what works for me. One day I’ll be old enough to learn I don’t need it to function. I’ll have options and resources available to get help. I don’t right now though. I have to work with what I have. Something isn’t right up there and weed fixes it. Sorry if you don’t like it but that’s how it is.”

“Tommy, you act like I dont smoke weed myself! I know what it’s like!”

Tommy falls silent. He furrows his brow and contorts his face. “You smoke?”

“Why do you think I gave you that fifty? Why do you think I never actually bust anyone? Tommy, I get it. I did the exact same thing. I still do. The only way I can ever grade all of your shitty homeworks is if I’m high. And I know what it’s like when there isn’t any other option because I didn’t have any. I want to find you what you need.”

“Probably a psych evaluation.” Tommy laughs to himself. “I’m serious, Tommy.”

“Wilbur, I truly appreciate the concern. But “teacher helping me find myself” wasn’t exactly in my life plan. It’s all laid out perfectly, I just have to make it to 18.”

Wilbur stares in disbelief. “Living every day just to make it to eighteen isn’t any way to live. Barely making it through your weekdays just to party on the weekends isn’t healthy.”

“No shit sherlock.”

“I think I will get you a psych evaluation if you keep talking back”

“Alright, fine.”

#poppytwt #problematicmcyt #problematictwt #problematic #problematicfanfics #tombur #poppyblr #ver’s wip poll

48 notes · View notes

nicistrying · 1 year ago

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Monday 31st July

Dropped my car at the garage this morning for its MOT. Had to get the bus home which was really anxiety inducing, not sure why? Like I've had bad experiences on buses but they were all years ago and never made me actually physically anxious getting back on one. Idk anyway I was already v nervous and on edge worrying about the car after Matt's failed its MOT a few weeks ago and we had to get rid of it 😅 I was just so scared of having no car between 2 of us who kinda really need cars lol. So I lost most of the day to just solidly worrying about that but I did get some stuff done while I was at home - ordered some gifts for people, did some bits around the house, got my work stuff ready and lunch prepped for tomorrow. Had pasta w broccoli and cheese for lunch which was such nice comfort food.

The garage called and said my car is fine, needs a few bits done asap but they don't have the parts to do it now and it passed its MOT so I went straight down to get it and felt much much better once I was driving myself back home in my own car lol. Now to get 3 new tyres and new brakes 😅😅

Had a little stretch and did a nice leg workout when I got home - had been wanting to work out all day but was too on edge waiting for the phone to ring. So felt great to let all the tension and stress out. I did some glute exercises first - 3x16 each of hip thrusts, deadlifts and reverse lunges with my kettlebell, followed by 25 mins on the indoor bike. I worked up a good sweat and listened to the Barbie soundtrack for most of it bc I'm absolutely obsessed. Like I cannot get enough of I'm Just Ken

Anyway it was a good workout. Maggie just chilled outside in the rain the whole time like a weirdo.

Showered, had veggie curry for dinner, and now we're cuddling watching TV until it's time to pick Matt up from work.

#monday #personal #fitblr #health blog #fitness blog #workout #leg day #cardio #health #fitness #active fitblr #anxiety #Maggie #Barbie #personal fitblr #Spotify

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whosmaggy · 2 months ago

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whats cookin'

i have heard through the grapevine (whatever that is) that to be considered a blogger, specifically a favourite blogger, one must actually blog! i think the big thing to write about right now was my recent move, however i just dont want to. i do really love it here and feel so comfortable, i just need more time spent walking around the city to talk about it. definitely see myself being here for a long time tho!

anyways as i listen to

i will give a list of all the things i have cooked in the kitchen of my uni residence:

Bagels!!

https://mxriyum.com/homemade-everything-bagels/ so easy and turned out so good! i had all the ingredients (there are like 3) and my dear friend, A, gave me everything bagel seasoning so ofc i had to make bagels on my first day here! (picture is attached at the top)

2. Chicken soup!

so good! i had half a pack of chicken thighs left and didnt want to eat anymore chicken and rice. so i made soup! always use bone in and skin on chicken. sear the skin side down for a few minutes to get a bunch of flavour and then cook ur vegetable's (celery, onion, garlic, and whatever else) in that. added spinach for iron and corn for cooler looking poops!

3. pasta

penne alla vodka (no vodka, sadly (im in AA)). Very easy, ive made it so many times, i dont need measurements. melted string cheese on top adds a lovely addition.

4. breakfast

not really cooking but i have become a breakfast person. currently its been bagels, fruit on the bottom greek yogurt (a different flavour every week!(this week its blueberry)) with granola and strawberries. also occasionally (weekends or tuesdays) ill make an egg white and spinach omelet and toast.

Have been cooking and eating others things as well. fruits, carrots and hummus, chickpea curry, granola bars, ice cream, miss vickies. also had a burger 2 days ago, and have 5 more frozen burgers left in the box. i have only eaten out twice, once for a bueatiful friends birthday! and once cause i wanted a burger and milkshake (they forgot my milkshake and gave me a can of pepsi instead).

anyways, i have been laughing at scammer videos, taking the train, and having dreams about one direction getting back together.

hope everyones had a fun first 3 weeks of uni!

Much love, care, and appreciation,

Maggy 🍔

#dailydiary #food #home #cooking #Spotify

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msbarrows · 3 months ago

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Yeah Anno 1800 is still controlling my brain and eating most of my free time (and some time I should be using for other things, like sleeping). Which means I've once again been skipping out on doing my daily posts, so grrrr at myself since I find having them personally useful (such as for double-checking when I last served something so I don't produce chili out of the freezer twice in one week sort of thing; I'd be fine with that but the brother prefers more variety).

And now I've once again gone a full week since I last posted, and apart from "played Anno 1800, crocheted a little" most days are a blank. At least it's the same save I was working on a week ago so I'm well past any danger of needing to restart from scratch? I'm in a weird mode with it where my income is almost always in the red, but I'm regularly selling excess stuff (some of it pretty valuable) to the NPC traders, and since those are blink-and-you-miss-it spikes of positive income, my actual money on hand has been climbing steadily despite being 'in the red'. I'm now up to almost 30 million in game, and seem to finally be turning the corner to actually earning positive revenue occasionally.

Let's see how much of the last week I can reconstruct:

Aug 20 - Chili and tortilla chips. There may have been a side salad.

Aug 21 - Pretty sure I did potato salad, corn on the cob, and hamburgers. Unless this and yesterday were reversed.

Aug 22 - Divided up a little under 10 lbs of mixed ground beef & pork my brother had bought, into 1 and 1.5 pound amounts in (flattened) freezer bags to freeze. Since there was still leftover tortilla chips, I made a taco salad for supper as a way to also use up the less-than-a-pound of ground meat left.

Aug 23 - Dug out some of the leftover lamb and lamb stock from the freezer and made a barley pottage with it, with carrots and peas mixed in for a veg. Barley and lamb is an awesome combination.

Aug 24 - Pizza for supper.

Aug 25 - Partially cleaned the upstairs bathroom. Did pasta and meat sauce and a Greek style salad for supper.

Aug 25 - Ran and put away three loads of laundry. Baked a loaf of oatmeal bread, except substituting Bob's Red Mill 5-Grain Hot Cereal for the oatmeal; it's also rolled grain, and I wanted to see how it would come out (delicious - had some a bit ago with my evening pills).

Supper was beef curry, barberry rice, and some mixed veggies sauteed in toasted sesame and olive oils.

Oh, and some time during the week I hit the 1/3 point with the green acrylic scarf, took a look at how much yarn remained in the ball, and decided it was unlikely to result in a long enough scarf for its excessive width. Frogged it and started over, doing the same pattern but based on sets of three stitches instead of four. It's working out as a much more scarf-suitable width now.

#Thing A Day #August 2024 #Aug 20 #Aug 21 #Aug 22 #Aug 23 #Aug 24 #Aug 25

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dairogo · 4 months ago

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55 and 69 for the ask game ☺️💕

55. Favorite high-effort meal that you make?

This is really hard to pick! I made apricot chicken for the first time earlier this year and my picky-eater kid liked it, so I think that was a big win. Apricot chicken plus cous cous and honestly right now I'm falling down in the vegetables department because just about all said picky-eater will have is raw veggies, but yeah, raw veggies with that since it gets the nutrients in!

Oooo~r if I ignore the rest of the family's eating needs (lol), one time a handful of years ago I missed a kind of food that was available at Uni so I googled 'vegan potato curry' to try to find a version of it, and then I had to find another recipe that used garam masala so I had more than one dish for the one spice mix, and found a variant of butter chicken! Each is kind of their own night's worth of cooking, but sometimes you can combine leftovers and end up having two delicious homemade curries with rice, and heat up some naan or pappadams with it <3

69. What are you looking forward to next week?

Next week, school holidays finish and I have an appointment one day, which means I will not be able to work that day, and will therefore get half a day to myself if no-one gets sick. I might be able to get some writing done!! I am honestly so keen!

#ask answered #time for hobbies is at a premium #I scroll tumblr and reddit so much less on days when I have the day to myself because the SPACE to do an ACTUAL THING is just so rare

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regulus-books · 1 year ago

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warnings: brief mentions of miscarriage, stillborn, depression and anxiety. if you don't feel comfortable please, please don't read it. I love you<3 and if you're struggling, or have struggled with this topic, feel free to dm me<3

wc: 1.7k+

Since I was young, I've always wanted a child. As I slowly grew, my want for children increased, I became more scared, sure, but nothing is better than your own little baby who will always love you, even if no one else does?

That aside, James and I have been trying for a long while, a year at least, unfortunately, miscarriages run in my family. I have been pregnant 2 times in the past year, one being a miscarriage that plummeted me and James in a deep set of depression, when we decided to try again, my baby boy came out a stillborn. I cried for so long after, couldn't forgive myself. James was so excited for our child, and I just depressed him. Did I not want him enough? I realized I shouldn't be thinking that way, I didn't do anything wrong. Three square meals a day, went to every single appointment, slept the correct amount of hours, I did everything right. James helped me out of the depression and my doctor advised me not to try again, much to my despair.

A week ago, James and I adopted a baby. She was born at 6 pounds and 7 ounces, no name, and her mother died in child birth. We named her Renee Lily Potter. Lily stuck by my side nearly the entire way through my first and second pregnancy, she saw the happy and sad.

Right now, I'm laying in me and James' bed, Renee rests on my chest, and I stroke a hand down her little back. I hum a tune I heard on the muggle radio, a funky beat that reminded me of my husband, as we wait for James to get back from work.

"Renee, darling, I love you so much." I speak to the child as if she can understand what I say. "I am so glad that you're here. I don't know what papa and I would do if you weren't." I pick up her chunky baby body and pull her up closer to my neck. I stand up and strap on a baby carrier to my front, then I walk out into our flats kitchen to cook something. I bounce around the kitchen, James is usually the one cooking, he says I cook like a white mom, and to that I tell him, that's exactly what I am. He always laughs and kisses my forehead after that, winces at the taste of the meal I prepared, but eats it anyways. I hear the fireplace turn on and quickly turn off.

"I wonder who that could be." I say, but there's no doubt in my mind that James is hiding behind our sofa in the living room, trying to scare me. I walk out into the sitting room, and sure enough James pops out from behind our couch and accidentally scares himself.

"Hi, darling." I walk up to him and kiss him.

"Did I scare you?"

"No, Jamie, love." I stroke my fingers around Renee's soft head, her hair longer and thicker than any other baby I've ever seen.

"Hi, baby. Oh, and," he leans down and lets Renee grab one of his fingers, "hi baby." He lifts her out of the baby carrier, laying her tiny body in his arms. She makes a noise and grabs James' nose. "Hi, my little love! You missed papa while he was at work, hm?" He grazes under her chin, and she continues to babble on.

"Well, papa now needs to fix the mess mama made, hm?" James smiles and walks into the kitchen.

"Rice, curry, and naan?" He looks around.

"Mhm, mum brought it, darling."

"Oh my gosh! Mum came and I wasn't home?" I sit on one of our kitchen table stools.

"Yeah, but that was the point Jamie, she wanted to see how I was settling with Renee." I watch from the table as James takes down two plates from a cabinet and plates up our food.

"Well?"

"Well, what, darling?"

"How are you settling with Renee?" He places her down in her heavily padded play pen, and puts my food down in front of me, I take a big bite and think.

"Settling fine. You?"

"Big change for me." James says, ripping his naan and scooping chicken into it.

"Of course it is, darling, we have a baby now." I look down at her, she's curled into herself and snoring quietly.

"I know. I just always want to be home, but I'm constantly working, I'm afraid I'll be distant with her or I won't know her as well as you because you're a stay at home and I work until 7, and that's her bedtime."

"I understand, my love." I nod at him for him to continue. "They offered you three weeks off."

"I know, I just want something to keep me busy."

"You know what's perfect for that?"

"What?"

"The baby, and me." James' face quickly brightens. "How about this, darling, I'll call Moody and tell him I insist you stay home with me and Renee, he's scared of me anyhow."

"Sounds perfect." We eat in silence for a moment. "Reggie?" James looks up at me as I start to wash mine and his plate off.

"Yes?"

"Do you ever wonder if she won't like us?"

"No, James. She'll love us. Unconditional love will be forced. And besides," I attempt to lighten his mood, "no one could ever not like you, James Potter." I semi joke, James' lips twitch up into a smile.

"Except Barty Jr, right?" He dries his hands off, kisses my jaw and rests his body weight on his arms, hovering over me.

"Barty secretly adores you, James. Especially now that your a dad, says it does something for him." James barks out a laugh as I take a sip of my water.

"Well, I hope it does something for someone else too."

"You know it does." I grab his chin and pull him down for a kiss.

"Hm, good, because you being a mama does something for me too." Being a mama, I smile at the thought. He smiles before walking over and laying next to our baby, probably almost breaking her play pen.

"Don't break that, James Potter, or else."

"Very scary, darling."

"Or else no more c-" he cuts me off.

"Shush! Not around Renny." Renny, a nickname James and Sirius have convinced me is adorable, Remus laughs every time he hears it, saying one day she's going to kill Pads for it. He wraps an arm around our small baby, picking her up and getting out of the pen.

"Renny is sleeping." I kiss her chubby cheek, and walk up the stairs to her nursery quietly, James following behind closely. He lays her down in the dark green painted room, her crib sheets a bright yellow color, courtesy of James himself.

"Goodnight, my little love." James strokes her brown skin, tucking one of her curls out of her face. "My pretty girl." He smiles and steps away from the cribs edge to let me lean in and bid my child a goodnight.

"Goodnight, sweetpea." I kiss my fingers and press them lightly to her head. James links our fingers together, pulling me into our bedroom, the next room over. He let's go and takes off his shirt, he lays in our bed and watches me as I remove all of my silver jewelry, and the two gold rings that James married me with stay on my ring finger.

"You're a stunner, mami." James says, laying on his stomach.

"Mami, hm?"

"Yes." I smirk and unclip the carrier that was strapped to my chest.

"That's a new one." I walk over to our bed, laying beside him, he pulls me closer and kisses me deeply.

"You're such a beautiful mum, so so very handsome." He pushes a hand to the nape of my neck, pulling me in for a lighter kiss.

"You know what me and Mum were doing today?" I ask, coiling one of his curls around my finger, staring into his warm, brown eyes.

"What is that, ma?"

"We were talking about you."

"Good things I hope." He smiles.

"I couldn't say anything bad about you if I tried to. No, we were talking about a song I heard, made me dance and made me think about you."

"What song?"

"I think it was called Daddy Cool or something, but the part that made me think of you the most, it said, ‘shes crazy for her daddy, oh she believes in him’

made me think of you." He smiles tightly, he peppers kisses all over my face.

"Well, then, I'll remember for later."

"James?"

"Regulus?"

"Did you always want to be a dad?"

"Yes. Always. I would always hog babies if someone had one, one time I was playing with a baby, she had a fallen out eyelash and I tried to wipe it away, but ended up accidentally poking her in the eye, I cried after." He snickers. "What about you?"

"I've always wanted my own baby, yes. Living in that house with those people, I didn't know what love was but I wanted it. I wanted to have something to always love me. I thought, after Sirius left, there was nobody else in the world who loved me. Now I know what love feels like."

"What does it feel like to you, darling?"

"Warm, everywhere. You, Renny, Sirius, Remus, Dora, Dorcas, Barty, Ev, the list goes on. Love is everywhere, you just can't see it first glance. When we were going through a rough patch last year, at first glance you couldn't see a single loving thing, but if you looked closer you could see how you still pulled on my curls in my sleep, liking to see them pop back up. You didn't know I knew but when I figured it out, I would stay up until you thought it was safe to do it. I craved your touch back then, and all I had to do was ask for it." James kisses me again.

"I love you, Reggie."

"I love you, mon amour."

#jegulus #jeggy dads #jegulus oneshot #james x regulus #regulus black #james potter #reneé lily potter #oc

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