#no hate to the person who made that post!!!!

[nemurenaivoron]

I reblogged this post and ended up thinking about it for some time

I've seen people being annoying with their "oooh everyone hates me, I'm such a bad human, I'm the worst" and I've seen people being annoying with their "oooh everyone loves me, I'm so great, I'm simply the best", and my general thought about it is that it's not the negativity/positivity that matters, it's the implication of a hierarchy that often goes behind this.

In my experience, most people who are annoying about themselves being The Worst/Hot Shit are also people who believe, in some form and terms, in them being a part of a social hierarchy. They have their own place in it. Everyone above them is better than them, and everyone below them is worse than them by some arbitrary Good Human™ measure.

The ones who believe to be in the low parts of the hierarchy tend to think of their self-deprecating behaviour as a compliment to others. "See? I admit that I am lower than you, which means you have more Good Human™ points than I do. It's a good thing. You are a good human."

And people who believe themselves to be somewhere at the top end up adopting the mindset that most people around them have less Good Human™ points, therefore less worthy of benefits that should be granted to the true Good Humans. Their compliments usually sound more like "You're not half bad yourself, maybe even almost my equal." Those people, however, heavily rely on bringing others down in their imaginary system to keep feeling that they are at the top.

Either way, whenever those people make statements about themselves or others around them, those statements are made with the hierarchy in mind, thus putting others into the system that those others may not agree with. This unsolicited invitation to be rated by some imaginary Good Human™ points system is the most annoying part.

People who are most chill to be around tend to not have any points system like that at all. They might see themselves in a negative or a positive or a neutral way, but it's simply their opinion on the current situation they might want or not want to change and not their placement in the imaginary ranking system.

When you don't place yourself into a made up hierarchy, people around you won't feel like they are being placed there by you as well. When you don't treat every failure of yours like going down a rank in a competitive game, people will know their own failures won't bring them down in your eyes. Most chill people I know just see everyone as "just a dudeguy (gender neutral) tryin to live a life" without trying to decide which person is better at Living The Life and Figuring It Out and which one is a wooden rank player.

Confidence is definitely nice to have, but it is not a requirement. And usually when you realise how fake this whole Good Human™ ranking system is and remove yourself from it, it gets much easier to act in a relaxed manner and develop said confidence.

See the thing is that if you keep saying "I bet everyone hates me I'm so annoying" is that its annoying. And people hate it. So it's a bit of a self fulfilling prophecy isn't it. You know what's also a self fulfilling prophecy? Acting like you're hot shit until you become hot shit Edit since I didn't expect this to blow up: By 'acting like hot shit' I mean having confidence in yourself and not getting bogged down by what strangers think of you, not 'become a self absorbed asshole' lmao

[xxgoldie]

happy little accidents

in which you accidentally send your nudes to lighter, and he definitely feels completely normal about it a/n: pls excuse the random letters that refuse to italicise, tumblr post editor hates me. notes: lighter x fem!reader (reader wears lingerie + one mention of boobs, otherwise pretty gn), mature (MDNI!!!), nudes (duh), mentions of rough sex, mentions of light bondage, kinda accidental voyeurism ig? wc: 1.1k

Y/N: [2 image attachments] what do you think?

A small smile makes its way onto Lighter's face when he saw your name pop up on his phone. Normally, he'd force it away - didn't exactly need people asking who had the Red Scarf grinning at his phone like that - but you'd caught him alone for once, resting on his bed after a long day. So he let himself smile, wondering what you'd sent him this time as he unlocked his phone - maybe pretty photos of the sky, or you were struggling to choose a drink at the convenience store, or you'd impulsively rearranged your room again. Corny as it was, it always made his heart skip a beat that it was him you thought of in those mundane little moments-

His heart skipped a different kind of beat when he opened your message.

Two mirror selfies, one facing forward, one in which you stretched to show your back. In both, you wore nothing but a gorgeous lingerie set, shocking red in lace and satin, a bra and panties and a sinful little garter belt...

In an instant, Lighter's thoughts were spiralling with questions and perverted fantasies. Why on earth were you sending him that? Not that he was complaining - he'd imagined you without your clothes more times than he cared to admit, and this was somehow better than any of his daydreams. Did Knock-Knock send screenshot notifications? Were these photos an invitation? A single word from you and he'd be there - he could fuck you right in front of that mirror, watch the bounce of your pretty ass and the way he'd make your eyes roll at the same time. A quick search told him that no, Knock-Knock didn't send screenshot notifications. Two clicks and the images were in his camera roll, quick future access to his personal slice of heaven. Shit, the red of that lingerie was basically the same shade as his scarf. Had you done that on purpose? You'd look so good in just that set and the scarf around your neck. Or he could tie it around your wrists, keep your hands attached to the bed as he pounded you into the mattress. Fuck, he should probably respond. What was he meant to say? Should he tell you what he was thinking about? That he was imagining taking you from behind, those crimson panties pulled to the side, no way he'd take them off when you'd dressed up so pretty for him-

Y/N: HOLY SHIT WRONG PERSON I'M SO SORRY

Okay. Maybe not for him.

For the second time in as many minutes, you sent Lighter's thoughts spiralling. Who did you intend to send those photos to if not him? Not that he expected you to send him raunchy photos, but he didn't think you were seeing anyone. He liked to think you'd have told him, even if it wasn't serious. Had he overestimated how close you were? Or was there some other reason - did you not think he'd approve? Well, not that Lighter would truly approve of any partner that wasn't himself, but you didn't know that. As long as they treated you well, he would be happy for you. Did they not treat you well? The mere thought had him clenching his fists with the sudden desire to throttle someone. And the tent in his pants wasn't exactly helping him clear his head, especially when the beautiful cause for it was still on his screen. And the intended recipient of those photos was the nameless, faceless mystery he was in the mood to throttle.

Crap. He still hadn't responded to you. You probably thought he'd left you on read.

Y/N: i meant to ask lucy for advice on the set ur names are next to each other i'm so sorry again, u did not need to see that

Right. Lucy often gave you advice on clothes - on the times you joined him in the city, you were constantly texting her pictures of clothes you saw in shop windows, wondering if you should buy them. And it made sense - the fact he got a full view of your body between the two photos was just a heavenly side effect of you trying to show both sides of the set. This didn't mean there wasn't someone else in mind with the lingerie, but at least you hadn't meant to send those photos to some asshole who you couldn't even tell him about.

But, more pressingly, he still had to respond. You'd sent Lighter six messages now, and he'd opened them immediately and not said anything the whole time. Not even typing. Just staring at the photos of your boobs like the lovestruck, horny idiot he was. He told himself to get a grip.

He had to be chill about it. He could tell you were freaking out a little on the other end of the phone - he just had to let you know it was okay, that you hadn't made anything weird. Without any hints to the fact he was picturing every possible dirty scenario that involved you, him and that pretty lace.

you're all good, don't stress about it

Shit. That came out way too dismissive. He should have addressed the situation more. Or would that be weird? Lighter was struck by the realisation that, for maybe the first time ever, he had no idea what to say to you. Words always flowed with you, even when you had his heart thumping in his chest; conversation had always been as easy as breathing. Though, to be totally fair, this whole situation was making breathing a bit more difficult too.

Y/N: thank u T^T this is so embarrassing fr

The message had served its purpose, at least. The two of you could move on with your lives. But there was still that itch he couldn't scratch; the guilt of enjoying the accident so much without you knowing, coupled with a desperate feeling that an opportunity was passing him by.

Lighter's fingers were flying across the keyboard in an instant, lurid compliments backspaced and overcorrected with praise that was far too chaste for the situation, then back in the other direction. He couldn't exactly tell you that he was thinking about fucking you so hard you'd leave scratches down his back the same beautiful scarlet as your bra, but calling pictures like that 'cute' would probably be insulting. The respectful balance he was looking for seemed just out of reach.

Eventually, he settled on something, finger hovering over the send button a little too long until he muttered a quick "fuck it", sending the message before the inevitable panic could set in.

if it's not weird to say, you look gorgeous in it

bonus!!

lighter's the kind of guy to send a risky text and immediately throw his phone into a river bc he got nervous abt how you'd respond

[tackykachowch]

Hey guys remember that terrible letter in s2? Well, how about I tell you that it's actually worse than it seems?

Alright. For the purpose of my point being more clear I'll recite it here. *barely held in gag*

"Silco. I've looked everywhere, but it's clear that you don't want to be found. Oh, God, I'm shit at this (THEN WHY ARE YOU EVEN WRITING IT YOU STUPID IDIOT. Sorry). I'm sorry. When she died, I lost my head. I told myself that what I did to you was for the greater good, that you deserved it. But the dirt was on both our hands. Anyway, you know where to find me. Blisters and Bedrock"

So, it is obvious that Vander regrets what he did to Silco and that he doesn't view him as a "villian of the story" anymore, so to speak. His murder attempt was purely emotional rather than motivated by ideological opposition or something else. Great.

Buuuut let's rewind to the very start of the series. Right to episode one. There. Take a look at these screenshots.

So Vander says to Benzo that there's someone on their side (the Undercity) who is worse than enforcers. Not even someONE, but someTHING. This implies quite a big level of resentment if you ask me. While he's saying that, he looks at his right hand and touches his uhh...I don't. Know how this thing's called I'm sorry. Let's call it a leather cover. There's clearly a reason why he wears it now, and this seems to be connected to the "thing" they're talking about. Alright. I guess we'll find out more about this later.

Fast forward to episode three. Heeeeey, what is THAT??

So Silco cut his hand?? Well, that all makes sense now then. Something brought Silco and Vander to a conflict, which resulted in Vander trying to kill Silco, and Silco cutting Vander's hand when he was escaping from him. For now (💀) we don't know what exactly caused such a rift between them, but it apparently was something pretty serious considering that Vander even stopped referring to Silco as a person. While he does later says to Silco that what he did to him was wrong, but nothing indicates that Vander changed his opinion on WHY he did it.

Now, there could be an argument that Silco did something that made Vander hate Silco AFTER the river scene, and this is why Vander thinks so badly of him. But earlier in the same episode we see THIS reaction from Vander when Silco appears.

So here's the question: why would Vander react like that to seeing Silco if he knew of something horrible he did post their fallout? What's more likely, he hasn't heard anything about Silco AT ALL, whether he's dead or alive or what he does. So Vander's opinion of Silco ("something worse than enforcers") formed prior to their falling out and it didn't change over time.

Now that we have all that information let's go back to our dear, favorite letter.

Uhhhh so. Vander is an incredibly awful person???? Either that, or he has an extremely severe case of amnesia. Because why would he go from wanting to reconcile with Silco and not blaming him for what happened straight into thinking that he's worse than enforcers and not even a person?? Or in his mind these things can coexist somehow?? And to add to all of that, apparently he never told Benzo the truth about their falling out, and made him think that Silco is an "animal". What, was Vander so butthurt by Silco never contacting him that he went full 5-year-old-mode "Humph!! I hate you now!!" and proceeded to lie to everyone about Silco?? So much for a reasonable and peaceful leader of the Lanes, huh.

But we all know that's not the case at all. The case is, of course, that writers forgot to rewatch season 1 and made up a reason for Vander and Silco to fight which is not at all aligns with what we knew about them and their relationship before. This is, ladies and gentlemen of the jury, one of the biggest cases of negligence in storytelling that I've ever seen.

[airenyah]

i need to talk about this line here for a second, because it's an attack on me personally. but not the english translation of it, no, it's the og thai line that really gets to me. because he says:

มันโอเค​นะเว้ย ที่จะมีความรักอ่ะ [man - oh-keh - ná wóiie • thêe - jà - mee kwaam rák - àh] it - okay - [particle] • that - will - be in love - [particle]

he specifically uses the term มีความรัก which is more like "to be in love". which means rather than "it's okay to love", this line is more accurately translated as:

It's okay to be in love.

and as someone who really really really struggles with self-acceptance for my own romantic feelings for others, this distinction is really important to me. i can deal with loving others. i love my family. i love my best friend (you really don't go here but hiiii @magsimags i love youuuu 😘 (i know you're rolling your eyes reading this as usual)(i don't care)(i love you)). i love my other close friend. i love my summer camp gang. i love my friend that style reminds me of. i love each and every single one of the friends i've made in this fandom over the past few years (you know who you are 💖). i KNOW it's okay to love. i do it all the time. loudly. as evidenced by the fact that i just HAD to tag my best friend in this post to publically tell her i love her even though she really doesn't care about my thai blorbos, just because i really couldn't NOT tag her to tell her i love her. anyway. i can love. loving is fine.

but to be in love??? that's a whole different story. having (in my case romantic) feelings for someone feels like a heavy burden. it feels humiliating. i hate it. i don't want it. it stresses me out. and the person i have feelings for especially can't ever know about it. see, i will talk about my crushes/romantic feelings, but mostly to family and friends (the better they know the person i have feelings for, the harder it gets for me to admit to it), and even then the word "be in love" won't ever come out of my mouth in my native language. in english it's easier, but in my native language i just can't say it. it feels heavy. it makes me cringe. being in love is horrible.

so when style said "it's okay to be in love" specifically? that was a punch to my gut. because this is a truth i have not yet managed to accept for myself. and if the person i had feelings for specifically told me "it's okay to be in love" so firmly and so earnestly? yeah, i would crumble too

[nymedesu]

This is great advice, but I would like to add something.

When people say they "hate small talk", I think they're using a different definition of small talk, or they're referring to a specific reaction they get when going at it.

I'll use a personal example, regarding "non-political events". Last time I went to the dentist, there was a new doctor. He asked me if I watched Sanremo, i.e. the biggest music event in Italy. Most people watch it - I didn't, so I told him so, more or less apologetically.

Now, according to this post's logic, he could have asked something like "oh, you didn't? Don't you like music?" or "what do you usually watch instead?", to find commonality or finding out more about me.

He didn't. He was low-key annoyed by this unexpected response, and went the "what?! Everyone watches it!" route, which made me feel uncomfortable as I was pointed out as a member of an "outgroup".

Of course this was just an example, but in the life of an autistic individual this happens pretty often, because there are many people who ask questions already expecting a certain answer. So when we say stuff like "I don't know how to do small talk", we may be referring to the feeling of not knowing the correct answer to sound normal.

Now I don't care anymore about being perceived as normal, so I stopped hating small talk, but I definitely can't blame who still does.

I'm trying to figure out a good way to say "you really should actually learn the basics of small talk" with sounding like I'm biased against autistic people.

[aramynx]

ENAMOURED KATSUKI...

... who gets so pissed off at you when you do dumb shit, especially when you could get hurt doing it

... who pretends he doesn't care what you do when you aren't with him (he does)

... who respects you for being who you are and standing by that no matter what

... who lets you drag him around the mall for hours on a regular basis, even though he claims that he absolutely hates it

... who always insists on waiting outside the dressing rooms in stores so you can model your new options for him, and it's definitely not because he likes you, or anything.

... who gets extra flinchy towards physical contact with you, like he's always on edge because he doesn't want to give away that he likes you

... who, somewhere along the line, realises that you like him, maybe more than he likes you- and he uses that to his advantage

... who starts teasing you on purpose, making fun of you for being 'obsessed' with him every time you ask to hang out

... who subtly starts dressing to appeal to you- a t-shirt that's slightly too small, a few little accessories that match your own vibe

... who, on the topic of fashion, always asks to see what you're wearing before you hang out, so he can start deliberately matching you

... who loves to place his hand on your head to show some level of affection

... who doesn't call you demeaning nicknames; the ones he has for you are just silly

... who always tries to keep his voice lowered around you, since you've started hanging around each other so often

... who starts routinely staying over at your place a couple times a week since you started inviting him for sleepovers- Wednesdays and Fridays are when he stays over

... who always helps you with chores when he does stay over, and always makes breakfast for you both in the mornings, insisting that it's just easier to make enough for two people than it is for just one person

... who never used to post anything on social media until you got together, but now he uses it specifically to show you off to the world

... who always handles you so gently as if you were made of porcelain

... who (begrudgingly) invites you to all of his family dinners so his mother can gossip with you about him

... who loves you more than anything in the world, although he would never say something so damn cheesy...

[shitpostingsapphic]

Can I just tell you I love reading ALL your post about Caitlyn. It is so refreshing to find someone who cares, loves, and wants to protect her as much as I do. I've been writing her character on my rp blog for about a year in a half, and I have had to deal with so much hate and ugliness and just... Its a breath of fresh air to see that there are other people who see and understand Caitlyn as I do. yes she made mistakes, but this girl is not inherently evil. Just, dumbasses can't seem to handle complex characters.

Some people truly see in black and white. They can't understand how or why a good person would do bad things, so it's easier for them to just call them a bad person.

I think discussion of nuance within morals and politics and media is SO IMPORTANT. I'm glad to be of service.

[olderthannetfic]

I'm feeling weird about an interaction I had the other day, and I'm wondering if I could get... I dunno, advice, I guess? From the usual commenters here.

So, context is that three-ish years ago, I got hate-brigaded in the fandom where I did most of my writing, in a way that came out of nowhere, and also in such a way that I felt like I deserved it. I ended up deleting everything I'd made for that fandom off the internet just to make it stop, including nearly six years of an art blog. I got a reality check later from friends whose credibility I trusted a lot more than random strangers on the internet, and eventually reposted most of the fic (backdated to the original dates of posting), and do actually still post fic in that fandom (also backdated to avoid notice). I also post a couple of fics on that account that are not backdated where I write with OCs from the original fandom fic in other fandoms.

The other day, someone who had been working their way through kudosing my stuff in the old fandom posted a complementary comment about it on the most recently updated of the two fanfics that isn't in that fandom, said they liked my OCs in the original fandom fic, and asked if I'd ever be interested in writing about that original fandom again. I explained that I was still writing fic in that fandom, it was just all backdated because most people really did not seem to like what I was writing.

And they responded saying that was too bad, and asking my opinion about a character they love, noting that it's pretty obvious from my fic that I don't like them and wondering why. And, like, this was probably just someone who was looking for fandom connection... but the character they were asking about is one of the most popular characters in the entire fandom. Most of the people still actively writing fic in this fandom are writing about this character, so if they wanted people to engage with about this character, they had basically everyone but me to engage with. And the person who set off the initial hate brigade against me that lead to me deleting basically my entire internet presence for months had this character as their URL.

So in my brain, I immediately go, "bait, this is bait," and delete this person's comments, delete my one response to them, and lock down comments on all the works on that account. And I know, I know that's paranoid overreaction. Based on their kudos pattern, this person was clearly working their way slowly through all the things on that account, which is not something someone who was only there to bait me would do. The only slightly off thing they did was comment on an unrelated most-recently-updated work instead of one of the works for the actual fandom. Probably they didn't realize that most people have comment emails turned on and didn't know I'd see a comment if they posted it on one of the older works, and they definitely didn't know what asking that particular question would do to me.

But I just... don't know how to exist in a fandom space any more without intense paranoia. I want to keep writing these things that bring me joy, and I do, but I miss being able to have my comments open without fear. I miss being able to post to a blog that wasn't locked down from Tumblr search. I wish I could interact with ANY fandom these days—not just that original one, but any fandom at all—and not feel like someone is going to turn on me out of nowhere. I can't overstate how out-of-nowhere that hate brigade was: my average fic got maybe 2 kudos. My art blog had fewer than 100 followers, and on average I got like 5 notes. I still to this day don't know why the person who set it off had such a hate-on for me, because it was clear from some of the anons I was getting that they'd built up a hell of a litany of ills to pile on my head, while all being vague enough that I never quite got a clear picture of what they were accusing me of.

I know part of the solution is to grow a thicker skin, and to block frequently. And I've been working on that, I guess I just... thought I was doing a bit better at growing a thicker skin and not being reactionary and the other day's incident made it really, really apparent I'm not, and I don't know what to do about it, because apparently the therapy is not doing enough! (Not that my therapist understands fandom...)

Any advice?

--

I mean... it's PTSD or something of the sort. Treat it as such.

[thefrogman]

People gave me so much shit about this post. I think someone even sent me a death threat and I finally had to turn off anonymous messaging.

At the time I couldn't find the clip I got the information from.

And a year later it showed up in my YouTube feed.

While I was mistaken in the first post, saying Keanu was patient 0 when it comes to the mag flip, I was accurate with my response.

Keanu figured it out on his own.

People who weren't aware of the technique saw him do it and decided to learn it.

People used the technique in competitions.

That's if you believe the director of the John Wick movies. He could be full of shit.

There was a second clip from a gun YouTuber I watched who said some of his military buddies were practicing the technique as well. I don't know if that meant they were using it in actual combat or just when fucking around on the range. I probably made too much of an assumption when hearing that. When I looked more into it, disposing of magazines is typically frowned upon by the quartermaster.

I have no idea how to find that clip and he may also have been bullshitting I guess.

In any case, I really don't understand why this inspired so much hate towards me.

I heard a fun thing. I repeated it.

Yes, I should have looked into it further.

But I can't think of a single person who hasn't passed along a fun fact without quadruple-checking it from independent sources.

Today I learned that Keanu Reeves developed a "mag flip" technique for reloading a gun that is now being adopted by competition shooters and actual soldiers.

Basically he just kinda twists the gun hard enough that the magazine flies out on its own so he can put a new one in faster.

I just thought it was crazy that an actor developed a viable combat technique.

[many-but-one]

So, our system spent a looooong fucking time trying to reblog a post by someone that goes by @system-junk-spam but after typing it out it became unrebloggable, and then upon restarting the app we found that either they spontaneously deleted their blog or they somehow blocked us while we were typing something up, despite us having never interacted with them before. That, or tumblr mobile just straight up sucks. Highly probable.

Anyway, we worked really hard on the post and still want to share our thoughts, so we’re gonna put them here. We may get eaten alive for this take, but we’ve learned to not care what others think of us. We are allowed to believe things differently than our followers do and that’s okay. Hate will not be tolerated on this post. If I see it, you are blocked.

This is our theories on how endogenic plurality can possibly exist. We’ve talked about this before but not in great detail. We are literally just gonna copy-paste our response because oh my god it took so long to type out and then transfer to our notes app because the tumblr app was messing up. To TLDR the OP’s post, they were asking for genuine examples of endogenic plurality that wasn’t just someone actually having a CDD and thinking they are endo.

—

So, for starters, I used to be anti-endo. Kind of a dick about it to be honest, but not overly hateful towards endos. I have a post explaining that situation, where I also came forward with explaining that when I was a teen I thought I was an endo because I didn't have trauma—except I did, I just didn't know it yet. I also used to do roleplay—though not as a system, for the record. I just had characters I made that I later realized were heavily based on real alters in my brain and it was that alter's way of expressing themselves before they could be known by the host part at the time. So to say I understand where you are coming from, I understand where you are coming from. I have been that person. I went hard anti-endo at first, but slowly as I've begun healing and deciding "I don't really care what people do in their lives and it's not up to me to police that" I have become what I consider "syscourse neutral" but "fine with endos, I just don't interact with the community much because I'm not endo." Mainly with the feeling of "live and let live" and "they're people deserving of respect too" driving that stance.

I start with all of that preamble because at the end of the day, whether endos "really exist" or not just…doesn't matter. They're not actually taking our resources, they're not seeking out DID specialists because most of them know they don't have DID, and the whole narrative of them "making a mockery of the disorder" is pandering to fake claimers, who are the ones who point and laugh at the disorder whether you are endo or not. Endos are not the enemies of DID systems here, fake claimers are. And whether endos exist or not, fake claimers will still fake claim people with DID no matter what.

If you make this post with the concern that people who say they are endo may actually have a CDD and that can be damaging to their healing long term (it was for me personally) or they may take longer to realize they have a CDD (happened to me), the thing is, they will eventually discover that they have a CDD if that's what they really have. You have all of these examples of people realizing they actually had a CDD because those people eventually realized that's what they had. No matter what, at some point in someone's life, if they have a CDD and the right support, they will eventually realize they have a CDD—even if they initially think they are endogenic.

To go on a personal tangent, it was actually a very good thing that I thought I was endo for so long and got completely alienated from the entire CDD community because if I had discovered I had a CDD at the time, that could have had catastrophic consequences to my safety. When I finally started questioning the system thing again my first year of college, I not only nearly ended my life multiple times (other parts attempting), but I also ended up returning to my abusers and getting hurt again (callback programming, l'm a RAMCOA system). If I had discovered that as a teen? It could have been much worse than it was when I was an adult. I could have been retrafficked if I went back, rather than just reprogrammed and sent on my way, because I was still young enough to be “good product” as a teen, but as an adult they weren’t interested in my “service” anymore, they were more interested in making sure I remained programmed so I wouldn’t report them and they wouldn’t get in trouble. (Joke’s on them, I’m reporting them to the FBI. Suckers.)

My system finally allowed itself to be discovered in my final year of college because I was a mere month away from moving out with my then-fiancée at the time, who we believed could keep us safe should we display harmful behaviors. And we were right, even if she did end up being an abusive POS later. However, I still found out I was a CDD system and did get the help I needed. And even if the situation is not quite as dire for others, if someone who has a CDD believes they are endo, chances are, the system wants that for the time being. And who are we to try to disprove that endos exist just so people will be more accepting of themselves having a CDD? You said it yourself, that people knowing before they are ready can be damaging, so it's really not such a big deal whether or not endos are "real" if that's a way for a system to exist without having to hide while also still kind of "hiding" in a way.

HOWEVER! Now that I have become more open to the concept of endogenic plurality, I have put a lot of thought into "what if it really does exist? How would that happen??" Because gosh, how brains work is exceptionally cool, and if there is a way for endos to be real, that's pretty fucking neat.

So, for the record, I am not endo and I am not fully in their circles nor do I know much about origins whatsoever, so if anyone wants to chime in their thoughts or correct me on something, please do! For this next part, I'm calling endo alters/headmates "parts" just to keep the vocab streamlined and succinct.

Some common themes I notice in endos (for the most part):

They have basically no amnesia between parts

Some can create parts at-will, while others feel like they can't just create parts at will, but their parts just kind of exist

They usually can switch at-will or control switching to some degree or even completely

Some folks usually have some kind of trauma, but that's not saying much because all humans have trauma to some degree or another. Something I've noticed, though, is that this trauma is usually not in early childhood, but in later childhood, teen years, or adult years. (Please know this is not indicative of everyone, just what l've noticed in endos l've spoken to, don't come at me if your situation looks different please!)

All of these aspects come into play for my “theories” on how endogenic plurality can exist. For the record, my “theories” are more like…my own ponderings on the subject rather than something that should be taken as fact. Only endos can decide how they exist, not me.

So initially, my main theory with endos (which l've spoken about once, a while ago) is that it is "IFS on steroids."

IFS functions with the belief that all people have parts, and that to create cohesion in everyday life means finding ways to communicate between these parts and reach healing conclusions between them. Kinda like DID treatment except these parts don't have the "becoming autonomous and elaborating" part of DID. This is often seen in therapy related to addressing your "inner child" or "inner teen" but this can also apply to "the part of me that hates my dad" and "the part of me that wants him to love me." Remember, this is a singlet we are talking about, here! Singlets can also have conflicting and contradictory feelings about their family members. Having a "conversation" between these two parts might look like one of them stating all the reasons why it's better to cut him off because he always causes harm, while the other side may explain all the reasons why they want to keep him around. Weighing these "pros and cons" in this sort of scripted conversation between these two "parts" can help singlets come to an agreement between these two contradictory feelings and find a solution that is best for that singlet "as a whole."

However, what if someone who has parts of self like any singlet does finds a different way to converse with their parts? Or maybe not just converse, but imagine them? Consider that their "responsible self who is good at keeping on track" is the self that they kind of "dial into" at school or work, so that they stay on task—so then later, the part of themselves that prefers to goof off and have fun can have more time to do that. (These may be labeled as a “school/work self” and “home self” by singlets)

Maybe that responsible side of themselves feels like a guy whose name is probably like, Richard. And he's a boring, middle aged, office worker looking dude. And that fun and goofy version of themselves that would rather ignore homework feels like a teen named something funky like Rainbow. Well, the side of themselves that's responsible (Richard) is probably gonna get into a lot of arguments with the fun-loving side of themselves (Rainbow), which can look and feel like an internal debate or struggle of "well I can totally skip this assignment because I have a good grade and my show's season just dropped and I don't wanna fall behind while my friends are caught up" being answered with "um, no, if I don't stay on top of things, I'm gonna fall behind on my schoolwork, which is WAY more important than my show"

See how that can feel a bit like CDD but not actually be a CDD?

These endogenic IFS parts of self might even become slightly more autonomous (or seem slightly more autonomous) than a normal singlet's IFS parts over time, especially if having these internal conversations are a major coping skill during stressful times. These "stressful times" can literally just be "being a teenager" because holy shit being a teenager is stressful!! Does this mean every teen who is an endo in this sort of “IFS way” will grow out of it? No! If this is a positive coping mechanism that doesn't cause harm, they may still have these parts of self well into adulthood or even their whole life. Because guess what? Being an adult is also stressful as hell. It would make sense that these parts would follow them into adulthood.

They may even have traumas they have to address in therapy that these parts of self can help them address. This doesn't mean that trauma is held within a singular part to keep the others safe from the knowledge of said trauma like a CDD system, (even if that trauma is repressed—because even people who are traumatized as adults and non-systems can have repressed trauma) because most likely, all parts of self in this IFS situation are probably either totally aware (if it is not repressed) or totally unaware (if the trauma is repressed) and when it comes time to address said traumas, the parts (while maybe not quite as fully autonomous with completely separate experiences and memories like a CDD system) can still likely be quite elaborate and be very helpful when processing these traumas or negative experiences. Brains are cool! Brains are weird! They do weird stuff to cope with shit! I totally think it's plausible for someone's IFS parts to elaborate to some degree if it helps that person cope with life, even if they don't realize it's IFS or a singlet's version of plurality at all.

Does this mean they would technically be a singlet since they don't have a “genuinely” fragmented consciousness? Maybe?? Who are we to say, you know? If they feel like they are plural even if their consciousness is not fragmented in the same way a CDD system's would be, why not let them say they are plural? They are experiencing some kind of plurality, just completely differently than someone with a CDD-related fragmented consciousness would. Which is kinda neat, if you ask me.

I recently saw a tiktoker who explained they were misdiagnosed with DID, that they'd been re-evaluated by MULTIPLE CDD specialists and been told they do not have DID, but they have some kind of parts influenced by them being schizoaffective. They genuinely have parts of self that feel like they kind of "step in" to handle certain things, with names and appearances to boot, AND this person is very dissociative based on their scores on dissociative scales— which is why they were misdiagnosed by a trauma specialist (not a CDD specialist) in the first place. Their parts are coping skills based on their delusions. Does that make their parts any less real to that person? No, they still exist and they have for a long time, but they are not dissociative parts like in DID. They have some kind of parts that get them through daily life even though they do not have a dissociative disorder. How cool is that!!! They don't cause harm, so they're not something that has to be done away with or anything. This person can just BE schizoaffective with parts. And the therapists are cool with it. Go figure.

I haven’t even gotten to the part where someone with BPD can have schema modes that are kinda like parts. Not to mention that just because people with CPTSD and PTSD may not have fully autonomous ANPs and EPs like people with CDDs do doesn't mean that the person with BPD/CPTSD/PTSD may not try to “purposely” (or accidentally) semi-elaborate those parts by assigning names or identities to help them cope.

For example, if someone has an explosion of anger due to a trigger and that non-autonomous EP is responsible for it, they may associate that non-autonomous EP's anger with someone like, I dunno, Bakugo from MHA. (I know nothing about this anime I just know this is an angry guy don't come for me please lol) So every time this person gets triggered into an anger spiral, they may assign that behavior to a version of themselves that gets really angry like Bakugo, even though it's really just the ANP being influenced by the emotions of the non-autonomous EP. “Bakugo" may never “truly” be autonomous like an EP in a CDD system would be, but that person who has CPTSD or PTSD may feel like they "become Bakugo" every time they get triggered and angry because of that non-autonomous EP's influence. Eventually, the ANP may learn how to communicate with that non-autonomous EP Bakugo and learn coping strategies for “his” anger and process the traumas that caused that emotional response, which can actually help that person heal in the long run. I think non-CDD parts can totally be a helpful coping mechanism for trauma healing. Consider how much easier it is to be kind to someone else rather than yourself. A lot of trauma survivors are incredibly hard on themselves, but may do a 180 for their friends and uplift them when they are struggling with the same thing. If someone with C/PTSD finds it easier to communicate and encourage healing to “Bakugo” rather than themselves and it ends in them healing in the long run, I’d call that a net win.

Like sure, you can say "but they're not actually endo, they just have CPTSD" but like…if they don't have a fragmented consciousness but they feel like they "become Bakugo" every time that angry non-autonomous EP is triggered, wouldn't that kinda mean that they don't have CDD alters but still experience SOME form of plurality? They may have an extremely anxious non-autonomous EP that is like a different blorbo from their shows, or they might name a non-autonomous super depressed EP after Sadness from Inside Out. While they aren't experiencing CDD plurality, one cannot really argue that they aren't experiencing some kind of plurality, right?

And gosh, what about the folks who genuinely don't have serious enough trauma to have PTSD or CPTSD and aren't really needing the IFS parts to cope, but created their parts just because? Why not? Especially if they aren't trying to demedicalize DID a la Astrea's Web or purposely trying to throw vitriol into the community, what is the harm in it? I already mentioned that they really aren't making a mockery of the disorder, fake claimers are. So what’s the big deal, really?

Why can't we as traumagenic systems just let endos exist without concrete proof? From what l've gathered, there have been studies on non-traumagenic plurality (I believe @sysmedsaresexist has shared these studies before but I may be mistaken...sorry for the tag, SAS) so clearly scientists have noticed this is a thing that happens.

Aren't you, as a traumagenic system, fucking sick of fake claimers CONSTANTLY questioning your existence, your reality? Don't you think endos probably feel the same way towards us? Like yeah, we have a lot of scientific proof we exist, but fake claimers will straight up ignore that shit and say the scientists are wrong. Why are we doing literally the same shit? Like come on, put yourself in their shoes! Let them exist whether there's a bazillion studies on them or not! As long as they aren't trying to cause active harm to others or the community (most endos just wanna exist in peace without being constantly fake claimed and harassed, for the record—just like us traumagenic systems!), just let them be! Live and let live. We cannot dictate how they experience their life, whether it's real or not. (I personally think it is, it's just not the same as a CDD—our experiences with plurality are inherently different as a traumatized system of parts.)

I hope my very long ramble was of help to you and others?

Since opening up to the possibility of endos being real and not being so stressed about whether it is or not, l've just been a much happier person overall—not to mention have a much greater appreciation for how cool the brain is and what we as people do to cope with shit. Plurality as a whole is really fucking cool from a scientific perspective. I think being more open-minded and accepting in general will also just make you feel better as a person. We don't need to be asking all these questions, we can just let it be! It's way less stressful, tbh.

[dear-ao3]

hi. you did not ask for it but i feel inclined to share with you some bits and pieces of indycar lore.

-georgina. georgina is a mannequin that hangs on a bridge at barber motorsports park, one of the tracks we race at, during the 2024 race there she fell down in the middle of the race and onto the track, a driver ran her wrist over and shredded it, the safety team loaded her up into the back of their truck, and later the driver who hit her (scott mclaughlin) posted a photo of him holding her hand up.

-will power ‘double birds’. it’s self explanatory, will power is a menace in the purest form of the word, and he is NOT afraid to flip off fellow drivers or, most famously, race control.

-the firestone firehawk, aka murderhawk. highly loved by fans and drivers, the mascot for firestone tires (which is what indycar uses) who is always at indycar races, frequently seen looming ominously around whoever they can get their hands on, hence the nickname murderhawk.

-bus bros. cannot even begin to explain the depths of lore here but im sure someone would be happy to. once a youtube series and friendship between drivers and teammates scott mclaughlin and josef newgarden (highly recommend watching the videos, very funny) it ended rather abruptly after rumors about their demise had been circulating, teammates who once hugged after every race win won’t even sit beside each other anymore.

-the AMR safety team. that’s all. they are amazing and we love them, SO fast and incredible, if nobody got me ik the AMR safety team got me!

-santino ferrucci. we all hate the guy, hes an absolute asshole, homophobic, racist, etc. most recently he put hands on a driver and then called said driver’s teammate his ‘little boyfriend teammate’. there’s a video of it on indycar’s youtube channel called ‘tempers flare between santino ferrucci and kyle kirkwood’ if you’re curious.

-arrow mclaren curse. this team is just… something.. their drivers have good personalities, but oh my! is the team itself horrifying! and this year we had 4(?) 5(?) drivers that all had the same seat! obviously at different times but it was Scary.

-we all love the month of may. the indy 500 is held in may, which brings a whole month of celebration and racing, from the indy gp, to parades to practice to qualifying to so many other events to the 500 itself, it’s an amazing month full of so much energy i cannot even begin to describe.

-bus lot pranks. speaking of the indy 500, during may, the drivers live in a bus lot at IMS, in their fancy RV’s, it’s like a frat house, which obviously leads to pranks, my personal favorite is when they filled conor daly’s hot tub with orbeez.

-it’s also important to note that indycar is small, the community is small, the drivers frequently interact with fans both in person and online, which is great! but it also means watch what you say because there’s a very high chance a driver will see it, our series is welcoming and non toxic! we want to keep it that way. 

-david’s bike. david malukas signed for arrow mclaren, but never actually got to race for them because he broke his wrist biking. he frequently makes jokes about it as he is very chronically online. he is also dubbed lil dave, that has nothing to do with his bike i just thought it was important.

-the milk gimp.. an absolutely terrifying indy 500 ad from 2014.

-the hate cauldron. back in 2022 three andretti drivers all made contact with each other during a race, which led to chaos, thus the birth of the hate cauldron, theres a video of it on here somewhere, and also when it was reborn this year!

doesn’t even scratch the surface, i’m just running out of brain power here, also a team got raided by the fbi this year.

oh and indycar’s youtube channel has tons of full races posted, they’re currently uploading the ones from this year, i recommend watching the 2016 indy 500, and i’m sure people would be happy to share their fav races to watch !!

by george. thats a lot of fun facts. thank you very very much send as many as u want (again pointing you to @ainti-pretty to send any and all fun facts)🫶💞 particularly enraptured by the bike saga (is david...still in indycar? did he just get launched off the face of the earth except to meme on twitter?) and the bus bros drama. seems bonkers. also to clarify your social media point.........do you mean on like twitter/instagram. or have they infiltrated tumblr. thank u bestie 🫶💞

[stacygetsit]

Lukey newts

*** Luke newton is one half of our power couple. The guy described by Nicola as the kindest guy ever. Yet by one moment that was changed for some in this fandom. Yes that dreaded pap walk that no-one to this day understands fully. One weird move and people have decided that Luke is everything we as woman hate about men. Why is that our first thought? Do we have any type of past behavior that would support Luke being all that's wrong with men? In order to understand how Luke is with woman we have to at least examine what his ex would say. So in one story that Jade his ex of 4 years posted She wrote that she was having a bad day and she called him crying. She came home to Luke having made the bed all cozy with a warm cup of tea with her PJ's waiting for her and her clothes laid out for her next day. Another time she wrote about when she came home from a night out and he had dinner ready and a stuff animal. So this is the type of guy Nicola has described. The kindest best guy ever. And his ex clearly showed he listened to her and heard her when she needed an extra something. He would always deliver. So we could say Luke was there mentally and emotionally for his girlfriend. He took care of her and cherished her. He let her know that he appreciated her. Jade said it was the little things like that dinner and stuff animal that made him the best guy. Yes while they may not have made it they still lasted four years. In an interview, the interviewee talks about a few moments in the show that the audience gets the ick from Colin. And Luke says embrassment all over his face oh I know one of the scenes was when Colin was chatting to all the ladies. And Nicola says it's because it so un-you (meaning so not like Luke). So in Nicola OWN words that idea of Luke playing the field like Colin did was so unlike Luke. Yet people think he had this hot boy summer and is toying with woman feelings. This is the same guy that knows it's a ick for a lot of woman. He knew what that ick moment was. Yet I'm to believe that he went so far from his answer to this player he's been painted as. This guy that chose one woman over another. One that supposedly toys with women feelings. He was in a four year relationship. Yes I'm sure he had some issues to work through BUT i have a really hard time believing that he's anything else then what's been painted for us BY others that know him.

Luke also did an interview where they asked him what makes him angry and his response was people being inconsiderate of other people. Nicola herself has said Luke made the intimacy scene more comfortable for her. Who Luke appears to be at his core seems to be a considerate sweet and kind guy who thinks of others, and overnight he was painted as this guy who plays woman and has no care about anyone but himself. He would have to become someone he hates in order to be all that he has been accused of. Yes as we go through our own traumas we might find ourselves doing things we never thought we would have. But there is a saying my grandma use to say that a tiger can't change his strips. The same goes for Luke. He can't change who he is at his core so that kind sweet guy is still who he is. Sure he sure has gone through things that have made him grow and adapt. But he's not going to become some womanizer overnight. That would make him do a 360 to what others have said about him. I don't know him personally but I would rather believe the people he's known for years vs what people are assuming. It's kinder to think okay I may not know what's all going on rather than think the absolute worst of someone that's been said to be someone completely different.

[stoneheartenby]

I saw this post a few years back and I hated it. I understood the message, but I hated it. But at the time I decided to scoll past and prayed that I would never see it again. Since seeing this post for the first time I lost my mother and I now hate it a million times more. Funerals are not for the dead, they are for the living to mourn. If Op didn't know the deceased then they have absolutely no idea how the bereaved are feeling.

To clarify bc this is the pissing on the poor website, I complete understand and sympathise with the point that OP is trying to make but to use a women's death to make that point is deeply insensitive.

The idea of someone taking the eulogy that I gave at my mother's funeral and using it to make some broader point about themselves or society makes me feel physically sick. You do not get to police the grief felt by someone else especially those who you do not know. I can't imagine the pain that that women's husband would feel if he saw this tweet, it is so breathtakingly insensitive. If you didn't know a person when they were alive you can know nothing from their eulogy. And you certainly shouldn't project your own self development onto the deceased.

A lot of people in the notes are shitting on this woman's husband but you do not know him or her. This is man who has just lost his wife and youre expecting him to have a eulogy that encapsulates his wife. Even if this guy was an asshole that still doesn't give op the right to project their personal development and use this dead women as a jumping off point to talk about their self help shit.

One thing I've noticed about my own grief process is that my grief made me more selfish. In the depths of my grief especially at the time I initially lost my mother I couldn't think of anything other than my own grief and my own experience of grief. I would never judge anyone for centering their grief on themselves. Grief is messy, and hard and sometimes self centered but I don't think anyone who hasn't been there has the right to judge.

[3416]

x com/joesnicky/status/1868753917515120960 “hockey twitter gif discourse again” and all the replies are twitter accounts going ITS JUST MOVING IMAGES ITS NOT THAT SERIOUS I COULD SEE THEM ON MY TV SCREEN. zerooo respect for gifmakers

oh i legit got into it a couple months back about that and had a whole bunch of 16 yr olds who have spent 0 time doing anything creative or productive for fandoms trying to ratio me abt it, so i just stopped posting my gifs on there like lol. good gifmaking will die out some day and everyone will have to stick with their blurry run-through-a-website shit or videos themselves, but i hate that account and everyone that's so catty abt people ~daring to ask for credit~ on smth they took the time to make like lol. the whole 'it's not your video.' well yeah no duh, the people who made it got PAID to do that. the least you could do for people who spend time and resources to make it accessible and fun to rewatch/look at for FREE is credit or not be a bitch but. twitter and even ppl on here these days are incapable of that. it's so goofy too bc on a platform like twitter... quotetweeting exists... so you can just. quote the initial person who made it with whatever joke you want to make or WHATEVER instead of saving and reposting. like it is SO stupid to me. every person who makes things gets that they don't Own the source material, but it's the right thing to do to credit ppl.

social media will eventually become just ppl talking at each other with 0 creativity or insight to add to anything bc they will run off creators of every kind. i see writers frustrated. i see fanartists frustrated. everyone's tired of the flippancy and entitlement bred on the internet these days. yeah gifmaking doesn't necessarily take As Long as other forms of fandom contribution (unless ur computer is a dinosaur like mine in which case it sometimes does), but it still is a set of skills and a process that most ppl don't know how/aren't willing to do to create an end product we can all enjoy without having to Save full videos of smth or go recall the whole game/video/whatever up. it's depressing to see and it will make me mad every time. the idea that the onus is on the creator and not just ppl to learn to be mindful of where they get shit like... you can tell who was raised on the better internet and who's brain is being morphed by this current wasteland.

[brf-rumortrackinganon]

I’m so confused about how to talk about Kate anymore. A lot of the conspiracy theorists are Kate haters (the celebitchy crowd, etc). The conspiracy theorists are the one saying Kate was thrown under the bus for the Mother’s Day photo because they can’t accept it’s their fault for speculating so they want to throw the blame back to the palace. But I’ve encountered people who use these lines. They also believe Kate’s “handlers” failed her, and usually they say this as if to mean Kate is just handled by the palace. That’s actually something I see a lot with sussex squad. They often refer to Kate as someone with “handlers” who make sure she is a perfect princess. That’s one of the reasons they hate her, because they think she’s just a perfect princess handled by the palace.

So the confusing thing is people feel like they are fighting on behalf of Kate by saying she was thrown under the bus, but in some ways there are implications in what they say that she’s a complete doormat handled by handlers.

Do you think it’s actually so hard to believe that it was Kate who did the photoshop? Some people seem to think it’s impossible that the princess herself was the one who did the photoshop. Or do you think it’s impossible that it was her who insisted that she release an apology? Do you think they should’ve released a statement signed by both William and Kate? I don’t know and I’m so confused. And I will certainly fight on Kate’s behalf always but I can’t do so about perceived grievances that I don’t know the entire truth about.

And btw, I just want to say to that anon that said nobody’s been wishing for William and Kate to divorce like they do with Harry and Meghan. The fauxmoi sub on reddit literally has Prince William affair scandal on their bingo card for 2025. Omid Scobie literally posted a clock countdown for Kate’s announcement earlier this year and all the sussex squad were salivating at what the announcement could be. How can people be so blind? I honestly don’t like speculations about Harry and Meghan divorcing even though I don’t like them. Some “fans” just want to generalize that “ohhh royalists are so mean they’re speculating about harry and meghan divorcing” while ignoring what they’re doing to william and kate. I can’t with people generalizing just so they can confirm their victimhood narratives for harry and meghan and justify what they do. Sorry for the rant but people’s opinions and speculations and the endless assumptions and getting angry on behalf of their favorite royals… I’m getting tired of royal watching.

Do you think it’s actually so hard to believe that it was Kate who did the photoshop?

No. I mean, that's my personal theory. William took the photo. Kate chose the best one and made a couple of edits, ordinary edits that everyone makes, and posted it.

Some people seem to think it’s impossible that the princess herself was the one who did the photoshop. Or do you think it’s impossible that it was her who insisted that she release an apology?

No, because I do think it was Kate who insisted on the statement when the internet blew it up out of proprotion.

If Kate can take apology flowers to Meghan about the bridesmaid dresses after all the shit Meghan put her through (some of which the rota leaked and some of which Harry confirmed in Spare), she can insist on being accountable for her own mistakes to the internet.

Do you think they should’ve released a statement signed by both William and Kate?

Honestly, I think there shouldn't have been any statement in the first place. The statement just brought more attention to the issue. Or, if there had to be a statement, the statement should have been "We made small edits to make our family look their very best as all parents do. Here is the original untouched photo."

I don’t know and I’m so confused. And I will certainly fight on Kate’s behalf always but I can’t do so about perceived grievances that I don’t know the entire truth about.

My two cents - I think you're taking it much more seriously than it probably deserves. You don't need to understand the entire truth or what all the grievances are. You just need to know what your opinion is on the matter and be able to reasonably defend it.

But yes, I see you. Royal-watching can be exhausting, especially when it comes to all the generalizations and whataboutisms and especially at times like this when there's nothing happening so we're rehashing old news and old stories again, for the umpteenth time. It's okay to take breaks when it becomes more trouble than it's worth.

(And a little PSA for everyone - I'm traveling for Christmas so next week will probably be quieter than usual.)

[tackykachowch]

While I'm on the topic of Sucker I remember I read a post abouttt hang on. I can't recite it from memory. One sec. Yeah here.

That when Isha falls on Jinx during the line "Pretty little lamb, don't come down here, you're gone, sucker" it solidified her fate, i. e. she's now destined to die because she crossed paths with Jinx. While it's a great observation from OP, but in terms of meta isn't it like....horribly, horribly cruel? Like what we're supposed to get from this? That Jinx is right? That her mere existence causes people who are close to her to die? Not even people who are currently close to her, but who POSSIBLY could be close to her. And that by killing herself she made a morally good decision?

That's just. *sigh*.....You know, as an actively suicidal person I'm like "Hell yeah I should kill myself too", but when I'm thinking about it separately from these feelings I'm just.....devastated man.

Jinx is an incredibly scarred and tragic character who didn't even have a chance to figure out who she is by herself until the end of s1. She and people around her think of her as a jinx, bad luck, and that something will inevitably go wrong if she's involved. But in reality, all of her "bad luck" is just a chain of decisions made by different people at the wrong time, or simple accidents. And yet because of this she's never given a chance to be happy, to live her life like she wants, to love and be loved. Oh, and Silco? Apparently you're the biggest idiot alive for telling her that she's perfect, because she's actually the worst, like you are, and deserves to rot in a ditch just like you (please guys this is sarcasm please please). It's like she's the only character in the whole show who is sought out by fate itself, because how else would you explain this? "Ah, but you see, Jinx's story is a tragedy" no it isn't, it's a torture porn. When your characters suffer for the sake of suffering and then kill themselves out of guilt and depression this doesn't mean anything. At all. Well, if other characters react to it properly and come to some meaningful conclusions maybe it would be worth something, but this is certainly not the case.

And you know what would actually be worth something? That Isha doesn't die. That the symbolic lyrics were all in Jinx's head, and she doesn't actually bring bad luck to the people she loves. She decided to call herself Jinx in s1, so in s2 she should've decided to stop perceiving herself as *a* jinx. That despite everything she's been through and what she's done she's still able to defy her circumstances and fight for a better future, just like her father did. She should've learned to love herself first and foremost, and that way she can give her love to others. That she makes other people's lives better just by being with them, as opposed to what she thought before.

Man I hate s2 writers go to hell