#nm: m song of the day......

[everythingsinred]

Let's Talk About NatsuMikan: Mikan (pt. 27)

Mikan and company are journeying to the past so Mikan can make an informed decision on how to act going forward. This journey will be emotionally taxing, to put it lightly, but she will learn a lot, both about her parents and about her connection to her friends and especially to Natsume. After all, she and Natsume are the "fated pair," aren't they?

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Chapter One Hundred and One

Mikan and the others are prepared to time travel now, with Mikan determined to make her own decision after getting her parents’ story. Before Noda fully takes them away, Yuka bursts into the room, calling after Mikan. 

Mikan is only vaguely aware that someone is calling out to her, thinking that the voice is both foreign and familiar. In no time at all, they’re time traveling and Mikan is freaking out about it, completely in awe at the experience.

A couple of heartbreaking panels.

Again, just like before, I am confused and uncertain about the role of relative telepathy during time travel. They seem to be aware of each other’s thoughts and telepathy is mentioned from time to time, like now with Hotaru complaining about Mikan having a noisy mind, but there’s not a clear explanation (at least not in the English scans). I’m doing my best with the resources I have, friends.

I mention this because it might be relevant later.

Ruka brings up the person who called out for Mikan and Noda suggests it was Yuka, who was likely listening the whole time and heard Mikan’s angry refusal. Mikan’s loyal friends admonish him for being so indelicate with Mikan’s feelings. She has some defense attorneys here, which is lovely.

We discover next that Mikan’s father was the former SA teacher, the occasionally alluded to “Sensei” that Mikan has heard so much about before, and that Yuka was Noda’s classmate in the SA class. Mikan’s strong feeling of connection to the Sensei/Yuka graffiti in the SA classroom is justified now. That bond was real all along. 

This trip to the past is huge for Mikan because she’s finally getting the answers she’d always wanted but never imagined getting. She’d always wanted to feel connected to her parents, to know about the family she never had outside of Jii-chan. Though she doesn’t particularly like Yuka right now, this is still a great chance for her and she’s not taking it for granted.

A preview for us to get a little hooked on this very long arc.

This first little moment in the past is like a trailer for the things to come. Mikan gets to see her mother at five years old, when she first enters the academy, and then there's little skips around, seeing glimpses of people who played a role in Yuka’s life. A preview for things to come, to keep both Mikan and us (since Mikan has always been a stand-in for the audience anyway, mostly) hooked for the next chapter.

From now on, I will be skipping through chapters. I find it boring to comment on Mikan’s occasional facial reactions to Yuka’s life. I will only be commenting on actual conversations and actions, because that’s way more interesting to me. Moving on!

Chapter One Hundred and Two

I’m just here to further elaborate on one of my last points, Mikan’s joy at finally being able to “meet” her parents, in a sense.

She is introduced to her father, a silly and good-hearted young man who wants to help the students at the academy and make the school a great place for kids along with his brother. Mikan tears up at this. Her whole life, her parents have been enigmatic stars in the sky, too far for her to reach, too mysterious to know. But she can see him now, can hear Hotaru say they’re a lot alike, can see his smile and hear his voice in a way she never imagined before. That’s her father, her family, a part of herself she never had the privilege of knowing. 

She had wondered about him her whole life, had--as I’d discussed at the very beginning of this essay--a complicated relationship with ghosts because of her feeling of connection that one night at a festival so long ago. He’s been there, every now and then, to protect her, to connect with her, but only ever through a distant veil. And now she can see him. 

I'm crying too. Damn.

Noda comments that Mikan has the best traits from both her parents, and that her personality gave him someone to believe in, a person like sunshine. It’s a nice thing to say anyway, but Mikan likes being compared to her parents because it makes them more real. Just like she always liked hearing comparisons between herself and the mysterious SA teacher before she even knew he was her father, she likes hearing it even more now.

Chapter One Hundred and Seven

We take a short intermission from Yuka’s sad life to see Mikan and her group reunite with Tono, Nobara, and even Tsubasa, who has gotten to know Yuka during his MIA time. She inserted the time travel alice inside him, which is why he’s able to join them now without Noda’s help. He’ll be able to help keep them stable going forward. 

Mikan is relieved and ecstatic to see her senpai again, understandably, since she had been so worried about losing him. She cries in his arms, only separating to finally talk to Nobara, who she hasn’t really gotten the chance to chat with since before the New Year’s Arc. She apologizes to Nobara that she was forced to make such a bold and dangerous choice for her sake earlier that night, and Nobara--like Hotaru--quickly denies that Mikan did anything wrong. 

Been a while, hasn't it...

With the reunions out of the way, Tsubasa has a chance to talk about his experience with Yuka. He shares that he knows what this trip of theirs is about and tells Mikan that, while the choice is definitely up to her, he can’t see Yuka as a bad person. He then asks her what she thinks of Yuka so far, putting her on the spot. Mikan is struck by that question.

Again, I’d mentioned this before, specifically in regards to Yuka, but Mikan is quick to come to a decision about whether or not a person is good or bad. The people she meets are immediately sorted into such categories, and it’s not easy for her to change her mind. When she sees the good, that’s all she focuses on. Hotaru is a great example. Mikan tolerates all the bad and insists on Hotaru being amazing simply because, in her point of view, the good outweighs all the bad. Hotaru can be cold, easily annoyed, detached. But Mikan tolerates this because she has a deep understanding of Hotaru’s positive traits, which, in her mind, are far more important. 

Natsume is a more interesting example because she hated him initially. While most of her friends are people she saw from a good angle all along, Natsume is someone she came to like more over time. She met him and was immediately introduced to the negatives. In fact, that’s all he wanted her to see. But every time she was given a hint that there was something more, she looked deeper until he seemed to be a more complete image of a person. I don’t think Mikan views Natsume as perfect, but the good--again--far outweighs everything else.

A loaded question.

Yuka is someone Mikan swore she could never forgive. She hated Yuka for hurting her friends and for being part of the evil Z organization. But real people aren’t so easily sorted into good and bad. Z is for the most part a deceptive organization that touts itself as a freedom fighting group while also participating in vile activities like child trafficking and slavery. Yuka is a part of that, albeit reluctantly. She has done bad things and has earned Mikan’s anger. But Mikan has just now witnessed Yuka’s suffering, her hardships. She’s not even close to understanding it all quite yet, but even what she’s so far seen is enough to challenge her previous prejudices.

Is Yuka truly unforgivable? Is she really nothing more than a person who has hurt her friends?

Chapter One Hundred and Nine

In this chapter we are finally introduced to Igarashi Kaoru, who remains elusive for a while. Mikan thinks she looks familiar but can’t place how she might have seen her before. Mikan is intuitive enough--she can see there’s a connection to make, like always, but can’t completely connect the dots. Even as Kaoru further interacts with Yuka, Mikan remains clueless though everyone else can tell that she must be Natsume’s mother.

Yuka is brought to Himemiya and Kaoru confronts her by scaring the shit out of her--but essentially gives her the message that she should believe in herself and focus on trying instead of making excuses. “Be a woman,” basically. Noda reveals that Kaoru was a key figure in Yuka’s life, who gave her strength and support and ended up her best friend. She even gave her more confidence in her alice through this particular encounter with Himemiya.

I think that parallels nicely with Mikan’s own lack of confidence in her alice and Natsume’s role in making her feel useful. Though Kaoru’s own alice has little to do with Yuka’s, it’s still predominantly Kaoru’s influence that helps Yuka feel more confident, like she can do good with her alice. Meanwhile, I do think the relationship between Mikan’s alice and Natsume is a bit more profound, but ultimately, it’s due to him that she feels like her alice can be useful. It’s just a similar theme, one generation apart. Very interesting.

She's so stupid. It's fine.

It’s only when Noda tells Natsume that his mother has always been beloved by many people that Mikan finally gets it. Her mom and Natsume’s mom were best friends, unbeknownst to the both of them.

Chapter One Hundred and Ten

Mikan is shocked by this revelation. That’s quite a coincidence (until you realize that kids like Ruka, with non-Alice parents, are the rarity and that there are probably many more familiar surnames at that school in this moment in the past… the Academy has a small student body because being an alice is rare, and most Alices marry other Alices and spend their school years entirely surrounded by the same Alice classmates… It’s not that weird a coincidence that Yuka and Kaoru met… that their bond never broke and that Natsume and Mikan met and fell in love after… maybe that’s a little more strange). 

Mikan knows that Natsume’s mother passed away, and she feels even more empathy towards him. This is a mother he never really got to know, just like she never got to know her father. This time trip is just as much a benefit for him to connect with his family as it is for her. For both of them, snapped strings they get to mend.

You and me both, Noda.

Noda further explains that Kaoru used her alice as an investigative journalist, trying to uncover more information about the ESP and the corrupt academy. He claims Yuka must have been inspired by Kaoru’s work, leading her to joining Z in the fight against the ESP. 

I’ll talk about fate again, though I only mentioned it in the tags of Natsume’s corresponding essay.

There’s talk of red strings, of being fated, with even Noda musing on the mystery of it all. And it is a huge coincidence. I’ve discussed fate a little in this essay too, saying that while I do think fate plays a role here, it’s inextricably tied to agency and choice, particularly on Mikan’s end. Fate united them, but they would only work if Mikan was Mikan and Natsume was Natsume. Fate put them in each other’s orbit, you might say, but their own choices led to where they are now. Nobody made either or them fall in love, except for the other. Just like Natsume fell in love because of who Mikan was, Mikan fell in love with who Natsume was. 

The cosmic influence here is the connection between two generations, the coincidence of Mikan, who was purposefully kept far away from the academy, winding up enrolled despite her indetectable alice, winding up meeting Natsume, the son of her mom’s best friend.

Fate and soulmates and destiny are hard things to define, and I’m not sure I believe in them in real life. But this is fiction, and fate is the author, and Natsume and Mikan were always meant to be together.

Mikan and Natsume hold hands, staring at each other, both wondering about their bond. Though Natsume has already said his piece, Mikan hasn’t given us much insight into her own thoughts, particularly in regard to Natsume, and this moment is no different. It could be that this new information is blindsiding her, overwhelming her even further. In any case, I believe Mikan’s head is a mess but that she knows deep down what she feels. Though that’s for us to figure out. 

Conclusion

Mikan's journey to the past is all about connection, not just with the parents she thought were lost to her, but also to her friends and especially to Natsume. Tomorrow (or whenever I post next), I'll wrap up the Time-Travel Arc, which is even further about Mikan's connection to Natsume. She will remain nonverbal about her feelings for him for the duration of this long arc, but her reluctance to actually speak will prove to be critical (I was not just bringing it up all this time just to fill up space, I promise!)

This arc can be pretty fun to analyze, actually. I hope it's fun to read. Thanks and see you next time!

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[cosmopretty]

꣑୧ All Mine — NM

summery - Nika Mühl takes you out to a bar with her friends just to see some guy flirting with you so she drags you home to show you who you belong too

warnings - smut, nsfw

Only an hour after you guys all got to the bar, you and Nika split up, you went with Paige and Azzi to dance while she stayed with everyone else sitting down. She watched you though, how you moved your hips to the song, the way you looked under the lights, how beautiful you looked all dressed up and pretty for her.

As your dancing you don’t realize there a a person behind you until you feel strong hands grab your waist, at first you thought it was Nika so you turned around just to see a random guy. You move away from him “Sorry I’m with someone” you tell him over the music going to walk away before he grabs your waist again. Nika immediately gets up walking towards you both “Come on gorgeous just dance wi-“ before he can finish his sentence Nika rips his arm off your waist “How about no fuck off” she yells at him over the music her 5’11 frame intimidating him.

The two of you end up leaving the bar after that, Nika hated when anyone she didn’t know was touching you, it was just apart of her protective nature. But seeing some random guy grab you, flirt with you right in front of her pissed her off in more ways than one. No words were said the whole ride home, her hand gripping your thigh for sure to leave a mark the next day.

Nika opens the door to your shared apartment leading you inside, she drops her keys on the kitchen counter as you stare at her. She walks towards you “Get on the bed naked lijepa beba” (pretty baby) she tells you looking down at you, pushing you towards the bedroom.

You walk into the room stripping off your clothes before sitting on the bed your hands clasps together. You can hear Nika shuffling around in the hallway before she opens the door a familiar strap around her waist. She walks up to you one of her hands coming to hold your cheek “You sure you okay with this?” she asks you, she always needed your consent before anything “You gonna be a good girl for me” she asks her brown eyes staring deeply into yours.

“Yeah m your good girl Niks— it’s okay” you confirm for her nodding, her hand that held your cheek moves down to your stomach pushing you down on the bed. She kicks your knees open both her hands moving to hold your boobs, squeezing them together “Fuck your so pretty” she says her accent falling lightly out of her lips.

The strap runs through your folds pushing down on your clit moving up and down slowly, as she teases you “Nika please” you whine pushing your hips up to meet hers. She shakes her head no both hand grabbing your hips to push them down “No no I’m in charge bebo” (baby) she whispers moving down to kiss your neck slowly.

She kisses down your neck leaving wet opened mouth kisses, and big purple hickeys. Nika loved to marked you it showed people you were hers, and that she was yours.

Moving up from your neck she stands above you admiring her work on you.

You lay there looking up at her a pulse between your legs, your wetness dripping down in the sheets. She looks down between your thighs “So wet for me princess” she says spreading your legs apart with her hands. Her thumb rubs between your folds before pressing down on your clit, your stomach turns “P-please Nika” you beg her, staring up at her with pleading eyes.

Her thumb stays pressed down on your puffy clit “Hm you need it bebo, beg for me” she tells you.

“P-please Nika- need it so bad, please” you beg her your voice shaking.

She thinks for a moment before sitting down on the headboard legs open, beckoning you over “Come ride me princess, work for it” she points to the strap hanging from her waist.

You climb onto the bed and straddle her waist, Nika’s hands flew to your waist holding your hips tightly before pushing you down onto her, you moan as you sink down onto her cock. The tip of her cock hit your cervix and you moan before she lets go of you, putting on arm behind her head and she watches you.

“Come on mama ride it for me” She whispers watching your every move with her big brown eyes.

Hearing her words you start to move up and down on her cock, her cock hit your sweet spot and your cunt tightened around her. Her gaze was set on your wet cunt enveloping her thick strap on, it was such a pretty sight. Your hands hold onto her strong biceps as you look up at her through teary eyes.

Her cock was so thick, you could see the bulge of her strap in your stomach, her hand comes to rest on the bulge in your stomach slowly pressing on me “Keep going bebo, doing so good for me good girl” she praises you, moving her hand that was resting behind her head to your hip.

She thought you were so beautiful like this, your mouth open, tears in your eyes as you stare at her under you. She thrusts her hips up into you, her cock hitting that sweet spot inside you. You moan your nails digging into the muscles in her bicep “S-so good Niks you“ you can’t finish your sentence before a moan interrupts you, her hand that pushed in the bulge moves down to your clit, her two finger rubbing your clit in circles.

“Come on mama, you gonna cum for me” She says her eyes not solely focused on yours.

You nod “Mhm— m gonna cum Nika” you whine your head falling back. Both her hands now grab your hips and she pulls you down as she thrusts up into you, hitting your sweet spot every time.

Soon enough you’re gushing all over her cock, your legs shaking as you whimper. She fucks you through it slowing down her thrusts “Good girl princeza” she praises you kissing your cheek. She slowly lifts you off of her strap and lays you down on the bed.

You look up at her “Wanna make you feel good Nika” you tell her breathlessly your chest moving up and down with every breath.

Nika takes the strap off of her body and throws it somewhere you can’t see, your eyes are drawn to the wetness between her legs. She takes her bra off leaving her naked in front of you she climbs on top of you “You gonna let me ride your face baby?” she asks you in a sweet tone her hand coming to hold your cheek, her thumb rubbing back and forth on your cheekbone.

“Mhm please Nika” you beg her both your hands holding her hips trying to pull her over your face. Your eyes move down to her wet dripping folds, her clit all red and puffy from when the you rode her strap, the base of it pushing against her pussy.

She hovers above your face, both her thighs on either side of your head “Stick your tongue out for me bebo” she tells you.

You stick your tongue out for her and she lowered herself onto your mouth. Your tongue pushes between her two folds, her hands grin the headboard as she tried to not put all her weight on your poor face.

One of her hands fall from the headboard to hold onto your hair pulling you impossibly closer to her. Your tongue licks at her clit, slurping up her wetness that now drips down your chin “Mmm come on baby need more” Nika begs you slightly whining.

She starts riding your tongue, her weight pushing down onto your face you moan into her pussy. Her other hand leaves the headboard to hold onto your hair to keep you in place as she rides your face.

“Doing so good for me” She moans out her hands gripping your hair. Your hands hold both her hips trying to lift her up slightly to breathe but it went to no use. Her strong muscular thighs squeeze around your head as she sits on your face.

Her hips ride back and forth on your face your nose nudging her clit as your tongue falls inside her. You push your tongue into your feeling around her gummy walls before falling back to lick at her clit.

You were pussy drunk, eyes rolling to the back of your head as you slurped on her juices and mouthed at clit.

You suckled on her clit, using your tongue to lick at her folds, hearing Nika moan “fuck i'm close princess” you increased the pace of your tongue before flattening it for her to ride it. She thrusts against your mouth getting harsher and harsher against you. Nikas thighs start to shake as her orgasm rapidly grew.

She moans pushing down on your tongue, her hands pulling at your hair as she cums all over your face.

Nika moans head dropping before rapidly moving off of you “Fuck bebo- you okay?” she asks you out of breath.

You nod out of breath trying to catch your breath “If I would have died I would have died happy” you joke laughing a bit.

“I’m serious are you?” Nika asks you concerned “I know that was a lot, I’m sorry I was jealous” she apologizes.

You pout sitting up and grabbing her cheeks “M fine Nika I like it when your thought you know” you admit biting your lip.

She nods and moves you to lay down and she grabs her shirt from the floor coming over to you and wiping her cum from your face. You lick your lips watch her naked body walk into the bathroom before coming back a moment later with a wet towel.

Nika rubs the wet towel up your legs to your core being ever so gentle with you, the complete opposite as she was earlier. She moves to your face and rubs the towel across your cheeks “You tired bebo?” she asks you after planting a kiss to your lips.

You nod “Mhm come lay with me” you demand, she drops the towel on the floor and comes into bed with you. She lays down on her back and you put your head on her chest listening to her heartbeat.

[jigsawstims]

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[conlangcrab]

It's not even conlanging bullshittery yet, just syllable structures.

C = K G KQ GX KL GL N = K G QK XG LK LG L = l m n r i u K = t k p G = d g b Q = s f θ ʃ X = z v ð ʒ V = a e o S = CV VN CVN

In this case, all values are in IPA, and, per se, /i~j/ /u~w/

Vulgarlang-generated word examples below:

abat /ˈabat/ v. perform

adak /ˈadak/ v. roast

adelt /ˈadelt/ prep. around

adhdots /ˈaðdots/ nnt. treatment

afkotgeig /ˌafkotˈgeig/ nf. cost

agbzholt /ˈagbʒolt/ adj. yellow, orange, brown

aibta /aˈibta/ nm. salt, spice

akbanp /ˈakbanp/ v. feel (sense by touch), feel (examine by touch)

akkthedtma /akkˈθedtma/ nnt. lesson, lecture

aldefpeud /ˌaldefˈpeud/ prep. for (the purpose of)

amgob /ˈamgob/ v. manage

anbesk /ˈanbesk/ nm. cord

apdebo /apˈdebo/ nm. science

appelp /ˈappelp/ nf. hill, mound

arkaltbzo /arˈkaltbzo/ nm. confidence

artkagietots /artˌkagiˈetots/ nnt. hint

asktshetkontets /ˌasktʃetˈkontets/ nf. killer

ateg /ˈateg/ adj. cute

athkpoka /aθkˈpoka/ adv. probably

atkodhd /ˈatkoðd/ adj. close, accurate

aukeddie /aˌukedˈdie/ nm. rod, shaft, bar, cylinder

avgeipeip /avˌgeiˈpeip/ nf. respect

azgbvelgo /azgbˈvelgo/ nf. factory

azhgtap /ˈaʒgtap/ adj. sharp, acute

baebe /baˈebe/ v. record

bapbragze /bapˈbragze/ v. lean, tilt, bow (greet)

baupke /baˈupke/ v. float, skim

bdheabdvo /bðeˈabdvo/ nnt. visit

bedaktha /beˈdakθa/ nm. egg

belttedhgots /beltˈteðgots/ nf. agreement

beskathkdart /besˈkaθkdart/ v. like

bia /ˈbia/ nm. scene, stage

bla /bla/ pron. which

blod /blod/ v. tie

bmekthoets /bmekˈθoets/ nnt. gardener

bno /bno/ nf. berry, bean

bodbzeik /bodbˈzeik/ nm. bed

bomtop /ˈbomtop/ nm. snow

brakat /ˈbrakat/ nm. bug

brozd /brozd/ nm. spoon

bvadok /ˈbvadok/ nm. spelling

bvoabots /bvoˈabots/ nf. pleasure

bzedokthazhd /bzeˈdokθaʒd/ v. rub, massage, wipe

bzhebvabzathp /bʒebˈvabzaθp/ v. create, invent

bzotnaets /bzotˈnaets/ nnt. painter

dad /dad/ nf. day, light

daka /ˈdaka/ nm. castle

daod /ˈdaod/ v. hunt, stalk

datshalkge /datˈʃalkge/ nf. process, procedure

ddhakia /dðaˈkia/ nf. song

ddho /dðo/ det. much

deazbed /deˈazbed/ nnt. forefather

deoip /deˈoip/ nm. drink, beverage

dethk /deθk/ nnt. crystal, prism

diab /ˈdiab/ nm. plan, program

die /ˈdie/ prep. like

dlamgop /ˈdlamgop/ nm. fat (component in food)

dlorgbzo /ˈdlorgbzo/ nf. chest

dne /dne/ nm. button (fastener for clothing)

dnork /dnork/ adj. weird, strange, peculiar

doikolbezhd /ˌdoiˈkolbeʒd/ nf. bedroom

dostbe /ˈdostbe/ nf. axe

drotbzaemp /drotbˈzaemp/ adj. serious, sincere, severe

dvadautep /ˌdvadaˈutep/ adv. already

dveaugtoeks /dveˌaugˈtoeks/ adj. urban

dvogeftto /dvoˈgeftto/ nnt. family (related by blood)

dzaple /ˈdzaple/ nnt. leather

dze /dze/ nnt. lounge, couch, sofa

dzhagke /ˈdʒagke/ adj. happy

dzhod /dʒod/ nf. emotion

eb gzhapadpod /eb gʒaˈpadpod/ nm. genocide

edbvabod /edbˈvabod/ nf. spring (season)

edhdbzemp /ˈeðdbzemp/ v. pour, flow

edouggoubets /ˌedoˌuggoˈubets/ nf. owner

eftteipedhd /ˌeftteˈipeðd/ nm. success, profit

eiddota /ˌeidˈdota/ nnt. fan (enthusiast)

ekag /ˈekag/ nf. advice

elbkaid /elbˈkaid/ v. charge

emdkia /emdˈkia/ nf. bow (decorative material)

enbeg /ˈenbeg/ adj. full

ep /ep/ prep. from

erbda /ˈerbda/ nm. dinner

ergodte /erˈgodte/ adj. sweet

eshpadkioud /eʃˌpadkiˈoud/ nm. family (children and parents)

eskdloke /eskˈdloke/ nf. soil

etengoga /ˌetenˈgoga/ adj. dead

ethtbabua /ˌeθtbaˈbua/ nf. eyelid

ettsho /ˈettʃo/ adj. true, honest

euteti /ˌeuˈteti/ adj. shiny

evgerdgad /evˈgerdgad/ adv. exactly

ezdespddha /ezˈdespdða/ nnt. meeting

ezhb /eʒb/ adj. fair, just, moral

gabzozgpap /gabˈzozgpap/ prep. in, within, into

gaklagots /gaˈklagots/ nf. flight

gapo /ˈgapo/ v. arrive, happen, occur

gauto /gaˈuto/ nnt. library

gavbked /ˈgavbked/ nm. dog

gdhampkadhgomd /gðampˈkaðgomd/ nm. penis

ge /ge/ v. receive, collect, get, accumulate

getma /ˈgetma/ nnt. horizon

glagofkglavd /glaˈgofkglavd/ adj. common, generic

glep /glep/ adj. big, great (very large), huge, popular

gmaod /ˈgmaod/ adj. light (weight)

gna /gna/ adv. how

gnopsok /ˈgnopsok/ nm. tire

goet /ˈgoet/ nf. copper, bronze

gopioupesp /goˌpioˈupesp/ prep. between, among

guadolttazg /ˌguaˈdolttazg/ adj. round

gvardgdhemteks /gvardgˈðemteks/ adj. golden

gzadzoat /gzadˈzoat/ nnt. poem

gzegkio /gzegˈkio/ v. excite

gzho /gʒo/ adv. down

kabblo /ˈkabblo/ nf. wind

kaftadhb /ˈkaftaðb/ adj. important, significant

kaksatia /ˌkaksaˈtia/ nnt. child (young human being)

kapabnant /kaˈpabnant/ nf. message, letter (written document), note

kast /kast/ adv. very, really, pretty

kautorg /kaˈutorg/ nm. cat

kazhb /kaʒb/ det. enough

keib /ˈkeib/ v. buy, purchase, shop

kethk /keθk/ conj. because

kfagesk /ˈkfagesk/ nm. paradise

kfet /kfet/ nnt. front, facade

kiazggastolp /ˌkiazgˈgastolp/ nnt. speed

kiodeks /kiˈodeks/ adj. reasonable

kletaeks /kleˈtaeks/ adj. powerful

kmakegtso /kmaˈkegtso/ adv. else, otherwise

knagdme /ˈknagdme/ v. have, take, receive, arrest, capture, book, remove, deprive, take away, get, accept, earn, gain, gather, evacuate

knetmaklavb /knetˈmaklavb/ v. chase

knotuap /knoˈtuap/ v. balance

kodiot /koˈdiot/ nm. manner

kotfevd /ˈkotfevd/ v. return, go back

kroeutonk /ˌkroeˈutonk/ conj. but

ksadkaert /ksadˈkaert/ nf. girlfriend

ksavg /ksavg/ v. can

kshagzhaeut /ˌkʃagʒaˈeut/ v. avoid

ksobo bakeik /ˈksobo baˈkeik/ nf. midnight

kthatoldta /kθaˈtoldta/ adj. major

kuog /ˈkuog/ v. keep (store), store

od /od/ nm. rain

oddmegmazb /oddˈmegmazb/ nnt. route

odklaitonb /ˌodklaˈitonb/ nf. change

ogeb /ˈogeb/ nf. bitch

oikamk /oˈikamk/ adj. fragile

olbple /ˈolbple/ nm. tool, appliance, machine

olpkmathkast /olpkˈmaθkast/ prep. onto

omdapkfo /omˈdapkfo/ nf. birth

onbkod /ˈonbkod/ v. teach, instruct, educate, train, coach

opguakguo /opˌguakˈguo/ v. limp

ortdzhe /ˈortdʒe/ v. edit

osht /oʃt/ nnt. country (nation), state (province, country)

otebtap erg /oˈtebtap erg/ nnt. fingerprint

ouktthopkeb /ˌouktˈθopkeb/ v. spit

ozbpegadhd /ozbˈpegaðd/ nf. trade

ozhbbo /ˈoʒbbo/ v. vote

pad /pad/ nf. wound, trauma

paib /ˈpaib/ nf. reward, award, medal, profit

papat /ˈpapat/ nnt. drug

pazd /pazd/ nm. series

pedraep /peˈdraep/ nm. wrist

peodapots /ˌpeoˈdapots/ nnt. memory

petre /ˈpetre/ nf. recipe

pfeapedhd /pfeˈapeðd/ interj. well

pfotesktthad /pfoˈtesktθad/ adv. suddenly

piadle /piˈadle/ adj. fat, big

piopemkalp /ˌpioˈpemkalp/ nm. risk, threat

plakpa /ˈplakpa/ nnt. quality

pleut /ˈpleut/ nnt. river, creek

pmasp /pmasp/ nf. card, badge, sheet

pneda /ˈpneda/ prep. except, besides

pog /pog/ nm. group, community, bunch, crowd

potadrevb /poˈtadrevb/ nf. beast

prashpbnegnoeks /ˌpraʃpbnegˈnoeks/ adj. young

psa /psa/ v. stick

pseippo /pseˈippo/ v. aim, strive, intend

pshakaovb /pʃaˈkaovb/ nm. profit

pthadiat /pθaˈdiat/ v. drain

ptherkdo /ˈpθerkdo/ num. three

pthodzabiet /ˌpθodzaˈbiet/ nf. thing, stuff, property, object, item

puate /puˈate/ nm. peace, harmony, melody

tabe /ˈtabe/ nm. mind (thinking faculty)

tadlafpbva /taˈdlafpbva/ v. think, believe, understand, analyze, ponder, grasp, trust

taemgpe /taˈemgpe/ nm. claw

taokgloip /ˌtaokˈgloip/ v. deal, haggle

tat /tat/ adj. cold, crisp

tebpedhbkret /tebˈpeðbkret/ v. drink, sip

tedmapgzet /tedˈmapgzet/ nnt. tea

teget /ˈteget/ nm. characteristic

tekak /ˈtekak/ v. write

tenpamd bmagot /ˈtenpamd ˈbmagot/ nm. lower class

teplovd /ˈteplovd/ nm. rib

tetoit /teˈtoit/ nf. darkness

tfadzazgab otebtap /tfadˈzazgab oˈtebtap/ nm. toe

tfotshako /tfotˈʃako/ v. keep (not return)

tiobvodavb /ˌtiobˈvodavb/ v. promise

tlapgage /tlapˈgage/ nf. moment

tleteka /tleˈteka/ nnt. tree, wood, plant, shrub, forest

tmanttuad /tmantˈtuad/ num. one

tmezb /tmezb/ pron. we (including you), us (including you), ours (including you)

tnagatht /ˈtnagaθt/ nm. chemical

tno /tno/ adj. easy

toadkodhd /toˈadkoðd/ nf. liver

togaets /toˈgaets/ nm. lawyer

tokekiaots /toˌkekiˈaots/ nm. repetition

tosk /tosk/ nm. army

totshait /totˈʃait/ nm. sword, blade

tsabelt /ˈtsabelt/ nm. boy

tse /tse/ nm. kitchen

tseb /tseb/ v. catch, capture, seize, grab, arrest, clutch, grasp, grip

tsetshabzhaup /ˌtsetʃabˈʒaup/ nm. hand

tshagia /tʃaˈgia/ nm. list, menu, catalog

tshezdezgtag /tʃezˈdezgtag/ v. improve, refine

tsokaik /tsoˈkaik/ nnt. ink

tthakeskkie /ˌtθakeskˈkie/ v. drift

tthoftaid /tθofˈtaid/ nf. wife

tuapraip /ˌtuaˈpraip/ nf. winter

[starboystation]

in your throuple with crutchy and crutchie which one of you is the soldier which is the poet and which is the king

OH ANON YOUR MIND. I think Crutchy would b the soldier n I'm the poet n Crutchie can b the king <3

[aestheticvoyage2021]

Day 232: Friday August 20, 2021 - “Not one mile further than needed”

Took our sweet time this morning getting up and out of St Louis for the final leg.  And that lazy pace was such a good thing - gave us time awake and out of the car, time to see an old friend, time for a little day drinkin even!

Started after packing out of our shit motel west of town, we met Professor Jellen outside his class so that he could meet William and hear our enthusiasm first hand for the drive and for parenting.  He gave William a good pep talk and advice that amounted to him just “being kind, if nothing else -be kind.”  Great advice old friend.  We will have to see him and spend more time with him on our way back through.  Here is to hoping that happens - every time we drive away from this guy we wish there was more time.

Then the big ticket item Id been looking forward to since hatching this map a week ago - Friday brunch at Hammerstones!  Everything worked out to bring us here, right on time and so we hitched a spot at the back of the patio, with the dogs and baby, ordered up some adult beverages, and some real good food, and filled the tanks within the friendly confines of my old and still favorite, home bar.  Maybe more important than introducing my little lion to the arch or where the redbirds play, was bringing him here and to the iconic facade out front.  We posed together for a selfie and I told him how this place and this city means a lot to me...probably in some way that he’ll love some random place out there someday when hes grown.  Enjoyed those champion flavored wings and AC got herself a steak, and the dogs enjoyed the fresh air and some french fries.   The owner came out and talked to us and made me feel like the old alumni with chest full of pride.  “Its good to have places to feel nostalgia for” - indeed, sad to think some people never get that.

We crossed the old Eads Bridge into Illinois, William’s sixth new state of this trip, and then pulled into the park on the other side of the Arch to get that view together looking back West.  That Arch certainly was my gateway to the west.  This city and that view means a whole lot to me; so much so that I almost could get chills in that steaming humidity with a puppy yanking my arm...life sure does look different every time Ive come through that portal but I am pretty certain that this is my best life - my best version here, as we turned and walked away from it, all together now.  And then we packed it and hit the road. Next Stop - Ludington!  Well - there’d be a couple long breast feeding timeouts in there, in Lexington IL and at the Michigan border.  But with our fun had for the day, it was now a Prius on a mission from there.  Hiyo Silver!   Through Chicago traffic, and missing sunset, and finally to the lighthouse in New Buffalo.   North and North and North now - under that blue Pure Michigan sign, we turned north.  

And around about 1230am we finally pulled into my parents driveway.  Mission accomplished.  Without urgent issues or regrets, we had driven the 2,138 miles out of the desert and to the beach.  I loved every mile of it - AC was great, the dogs were the best, and William proved to be a pro.  For as much as we stressed about being able to pull it off, it proved to be as easy as can be.  As I turned the car off, I imagined the sound of me leveling up on my rambler status, like I should get a special upgrade or badge for Silver The Prius.   Thats always a great feeling - to finally make it to the end.  BUT the real memorable finish was that the gas range sat at 0.0 when we pulled in to home.   I took that as a nod from the Universe for gifting me a great smooth ramble.  A nod to that idea that the road does always provide.  Not one mile more than I needed to bring this circus on home.

Miles today: 511 miles 4 states (MO, IL, IN, MI)

Total: 2,138 miles, 9 States (AZ, NM, TX, OK, AR, MO, IL, IN, MI), 4 time zones. 2 dogs, 1 baby, 1 Prius.

Song: The Black Keys - Everlasting Light

Quote: All of those things - rock and men and river - resisted change, resisted the coming as they did the going… The nature of things is resistance to change, while the nature of process is resistance to stasis, yet things and process are one, and the line from inorganic to organic and back is uninterrupted and unbroken. William Least Heat Moon

[komburecord]

2020/7/13 新入荷商品リスト

【邦楽・レコード】

 ・THE BEATNIKS / NO WAY OUT 出口なし [1001807  EX-/VG+ 盤スレ,ジャケットシール] EP 880円(税込)

 ・エルム / 何故か淋しくて [SF39  EX/EX ジャケットしわ] EP 880円(税込)

・ザ・シックハックス / 帰らぬ君 [PRB4091  EX-/EX- ジャケットしみ] EP 1,650円(税込)

・ザ・ロビンフッズ / 落第生バンザイ [SAS1084  EX/EX- ジャケットよれ] EP 880円(税込)

・マハロ・エコーズ / 恋獄のブルース [SV597  EX/EX- 盤スレ小,ジャケットしわ多,内側にしみ] EP 1,760円(税込)

・やまがたすみこ / 二つの心 [CD218  EX+/EX+] EP 880円(税込)

・山川ユキ / 新宿ダダ [KA1057  EX-/EX 盤スレ,ジャケット裏汚れ小] EP 1,540円(税込)

・ローズマリー / グッバイ・ヘンリー [FS2044  EX-/VG+ 盤スレ小、ジャケット折れ・汚れ] EP 880円(税込)

・佐渡山豊 / ドゥーチュイムニイ [EB1013  EX-/EX 盤スレ,傷一か所,ジャケット汚れ小,右下カット] EP SOLDOUT!

・篠ヒロコ / 私あぶないの [BS1404  EX/EX 盤キズ一か所,ジャケットにテープ,裏しみうっすら] EP 4,290円(税込)

・小野和子 / 帰らない人 [EP1195  EX/EX- 盤スレ,ジャケットしわ,破れ小] EP 1,430円(税込)

・神田広美 / ジャスミンアフタヌーン [DR6142  EX/EX- 盤スレ小,ジャケットテープ跡,しみ小] EP 880円(税込)

・西条ロック / 三つで五百円 [DR1982  EX-/EX 盤スレ,ジャケットしみ小] EP 3,080円(税込)

・大原麗子 / さりげなく悪いやつ [SM06126  EX/EX+ 盤スレ小] EP 880円(税込)

・田代まさし / 新島の伝説 [075H309  EX/EX+] EP SOLDOUT!

・比企理恵 / 恋のワナ・ワナ [AK699  EX/EX] EP 880円(税込)

・邦ひろし / ああ聖徳太子さま [L179P  EX/EX] EP 1,100円(税込)

・由美かおる / タバコの火を消して [FS1171  EX/VG- ジャケット書込み多、人名書込み] EP SOLD OUT

・沢田研二 / ノン・ポリシー [28MX1171  EX/EX+ シュリンク付,見本盤, ジャケット・ブックレット汚れ] LP 1,210円(税込)

・中森明菜 / クリムゾン [L12650  EX+/EX- 帯付,ブックレット汚れ小] LP SOLD OUT!

・越美晴 / おもちゃ箱 第1幕 [RVL7211  EX+/EX+ 帯付,ライナー付] LP SOLDOUT

・小林旭 / さすらいの道 小林旭オン・ステージ [GWS1043  EX+/EX 帯付、ライナー付] LP SOLDOUT

・はっぴいえんど / CITY [OFL15  EX-/VG 盤スレ,帯無し,ジャケ天半分裂け,底端裂け小,インナースリーブ底抜け] LP SOLD OUT

・岩崎宏美 / 83岩崎宏美 リサイタル [SJX30216  EX+/EX ジャケットすれ,帯付] LP SOLDOUT

【邦楽・CD】

・FLIPPER'S GUITAR / ヘッド博士の世界塔 [PSCR5048  EX-/EX 帯付,盤傷小] CD 1,870円(税込)

・あがた森魚 / 日本少年2000系 [KTCR1666  EX/EX+ 帯付] CD 1,980円(税込)

・オムニバス / ソングライター・ルネッサンス キング編Ⅱ [KICS2127  EX/EX- 帯無し] CD 1,540円(税込)

・ザバダック / 飛行夢 [32XM97  EX/EX- 帯付,ライナー折れ] CD 1,540円(税込)

・シュガー・��イブ / ソングス [SRCL5003  EX+/EX+ 帯付] CD SOLD OUT

・白井良明 / タナカヒロシのすべてO.S.T [VPCD81512  EX/EX 帯付] CD 1,650円(税込)

・どついたるねん / おならぷーぷーセッション [BDC38  EX+/EX+ 元々帯無し] CD 1,320円(税込)

・トワ・エ・モア / ユートピア [TOCT-26121  EX/EX 紙ジャケ,帯背ヤケ小,ジャケ内シール貼] CD SOLDOUT

・ラッキーオールドサン / I'M SO SORRY,MOM [ARTKT2  EX+/EX+ 帯付,ステッカー付] CD 1,650円(税込)

・金延幸子 / み空 [IOCD40081  EX-/EX 帯付,盤スレ小] CD 2,420円(税込)

・柴田聡子 / 愛の休日 [PCD18820  M 新品未開封] CD 1,980円(税込)

・小室等 / プロテストソング2 [FLCF4509  EX/EX-帯無し,ジャケ傷み] CD 2,320円(税込)

・松尾清憲 / ベスト [POCH1220  EX/EX 帯付,廃盤] CD 4,950円(税込)

・南野陽子 / NANNO Singles [32DH5021  EX/EX- シール帯剥がれ小、ライナー汚れ] CD 1,430円(税込)

・矢野顕子 / 愛がなくちゃね [MDCL-1252  EX+/EX 帯付] CD SOLD OUT!

【洋楽・レコード】

・BOB DYLAN / DESIRE [SOPO-116  EX+/EX+ 国内盤帯付 盤：極めて良好 ジャケ：極めて良好。美品。] LP 3,850円(税込)

・BP FALLON&DAVID HOLMS / HENRY McCULLOUGH(ANDREW WEATHERALL REMIX) [ALN1245S  M 新品未開封 限定1000枚プレス] LP 2,420円(税込)

・CAROL KING / SIMPLE THINGS [MOVLP1825  M 新品未開封 180g重量盤] LP 3.930円(税込)

・CATE LE BON&BRADFORD COX / SAME [MYTHS004  NM] LP 3,080円(税込)

・CAVERN OF ANTI-MATTER / VOID BEATS/INVOCATION TREX [DUHFLP23  NM 3LP] LP 4,400円(税込)

・CROSBY.STILLS&NASH / SAME [588189  EX-/EX- UKオリジナル盤 盤僅かに傷あり ジャケ全体に良好だが下面にLP破れ穴。] LP 4,950円(税込)

・David Byrne / The Catherine Wheel [SPK 3645  EX/VG- ジャケに数か所擦り傷] LP 1,650円(税込)

・EDWIN COLLINS / Coffee Table Song [D1064T  EX+/EX 輸入盤] LP 1,100円(税込)

・faces / OOH LA LA [BS2665  EX-/VG+ USオリジナル盤 特殊ジャケ ポスター付き 盤：薄いスレ ジャケ：経年焼け、少し破れ、うち袋破れ] LP 4,950円(税込)

・JAMES TAYLOR / sweet baby james [P-8001W  NM/NM 国内盤帯付 盤：極め良好 ジャケ：極めて良好] LP SOLD OUT!

・JAYNE MANSFIELD featuring JIMI HENDRIX / SUEY [TP263  M 新品未開封] LP 3,960円(税込)

・MARIA MULDAUR / SAME [MS 2148  EX/EX+ USオリジナル盤 盤：傷なく良好 ジャケ：極めて良好] LP 4,290円(税込)

・NEIL YOUNG / AFTER THE GOLD RUSH [P-8002R  EX/VG 国内盤帯無し 盤：概ね良好 ジャケ：経年スレ・少しの折れ・汚れあり] LP SOLDOUT

・OVARY LODGE /  SAME [RCA SF8372  EX-/EX- UKオリジナル ジャケ若干のスレ、盤僅かな擦り傷] LP 18,700円(税込)

・PETER GABRIEL / Ⅳ [25S-137  EX+/EX 国内盤帯付 盤：極めて良好 ジャケ：極めて良好] LP 1,650円(税込)

・PHOEBE BRIDGERS / STRANGER IN THE ALPS [DOC142LP  NM LAVENDER VYNYL LTD　US盤] LP SOLD OUT

・Robert Wyatt / [Ruth Is Stranger Than Richard  REWIGLP41  M 新品未開封] LP 3,740円(税込)

・ROLLING SONES / Begards Banquet [UIJY-75093  M 国内盤新品未開封 リリース50周年記念完全生産限定　英国デッカ社直輸入盤。] LP 8,580円(税込)

・SCHORSCH KAMERUN / warum Andern schlief [LADO 17037-1  VG/VG+ 独オリジナル盤] LP 3,850円(税込)

・TALKING HEADS / READIOHEAD/HEY NOW [12EM1  EX-/EX- 輸入盤 盤：若干の擦り傷 ジャケ：経年のシワ、リングウェア] LP 880円(税込)

【洋楽・CD】

・AZTECA / SAME [GNPD2237  EX/EX 輸入盤 盤：良好 ジャケ：良好] CD 1,100円(税込)

・BILLY PRESTON / THAT'S THE WAY GOD PLANNED IT [TOCP-6893  EX/EX 国内盤帯付 盤：良好 ジャケ：良好] CD 1,210円(税込)

・blind mr. jones / spooky vibes the very best of blind mr. jones  [CDM RED 277  EX+/EX+ 輸入盤] CD SOLD OUT

・David syivian・horger czukay / FLUX+MUTABILITY [VJCP-23078  EX/EX 国内盤帯付] CD 3,300円(税込)

・Gong / Continental Circus [MSIF3410  EX+/EX　国内盤帯付] CD SOLD OUT

・John Greaves / Life Size [DUPG241  NM/NM 国内盤帯付 美品] CD 2,750円(税込)

・NINE INCH NAILS / THE FRAGILE [06949 04732  M 輸入盤2CD 新品未開封] CD 1,320円(税込)

・PINK FLOYD / ECHOES The Best of Pink Floyd [7243 5 36111 2 5  EX/EX 輸入盤2CD 盤：良好 ジャケ：良好、外側紙カバー擦り傷] CD 1,980円(税込)

・Public Image Limited / ALIFE2009   [CLCD254  M 新品未開封 限定盤] CD 3,960円(税込)

・RADIOHEAD / AIRBAG/HOW AM I DRIVING?  [C2 7243 8 58701 2 5  EX+/EX　US盤] CD SOLD OUT

・ROLLING STONES / EMOTIONAL RESCUE [TOCP-66548  EX+/EX+ 国内盤帯付完全初回生産限定でかジャケCD。大型ポスター・ジャケット入り 盤：良好 ジャケ：全体に良好、わずかなひび、擦り傷、帯少しの破れ。] CD 3,190円(税込)

・SILVER APPLES / TWO RECORDS ON ONE CD [TRC 039  EX/EX GERMANY盤] CD 2,200円(税込)

・SLOWDIVE / JUST FOR A DAY [VSCD-8150  NM/NM 国内盤帯付 2CD] CD SOLDOUT!

・SOFT MACHINE / SAME  [MSIF2172  EX+/EX+ 国内盤帯付] CD 1,430円(税込)

・SQUAREPUSHER / SOLO ELECTRIC BASS 1 [BRWP174  EX+/EX 国内盤帯付 限定版国内700枚　紙ジャケ仕様] CD 1,650円(税込)

・The Shaggs / SAME [ROUNDER CD 11547  EX+/EX+ 国内盤帯付] CD SOLDOUT!

・THE THE / DUSK [472468 2  NM 輸入盤 限定500枚シリアルナンバー入り紙パッケージ　盤は未使用。紙パッケージのみ若干の汚れあり] CD 5,500円(税込)

・THEUP / KILLER UP! [NERCD3002  EX+/EX+] CD 5,500円(税込)

ご購入希望はお電話・メールにてお問い合わせ頂くか、下記通販サイトをご利用ください。

https://komburecord.thebase.in/

KOMBU RECORD

TEL:08072110605

MAIL:happyturn0605@yahoo.ne.jp

[everythingsinred]

Let's Talk About NatsuMikan: Mikan (pt. 40)

Hey! I played Just Dance with Zoe and then decided I was just gonna post this last part because I don't want it hanging over me. It's July and I just exercised and it's really friggin' hot and I'm sweating but I'm gonna post this so I don't forget tomorrow.

That's right, folks! Just one more part in the forty part essay special by yours truly about everyone's favorite shoujo manga couple (I speak for everyone on the planet, yes)!

<- Prev

Kageki no Kuni no Alice Chapter Four

Kageki is a step-up from the last few chapters because… well, because I get to pretend like those chapters just didn’t happen. There’s a lot I don’t like about Kageki, but I like the NatsuMikan, which there is a fair amount of! And that’s what I’ll be discussing today. Hopefully that’ll lighten the mood from last time. Though! I don't have much new to say that I didn't already say in Natsume's version. I'll do my best so we can end on a high note!

Natsume and Mikan are at the Opera School in order to visit Aoi, because they do everything together. But Natsume is also being ridiculously cold to one of Aoi’s classmates, Tsubasa’s sister, for no real reason. So Mikan and Aoi both scold him for being mean. Mikan apologizes for Natsume’s sake and we get a glimpse of the fact that they both have matching promise rings. 

RINGS!!!! They're gonna get married!!!

This is pretty big because as far as we know, Mikan just got back to the Academy a few weeks ago, and only part of her memories were recovered, but somehow in that time, her romance with Natsume has rekindled enough that she once more wants to get married to him… though this rekindling occurred off-page. Sigh. 

This chapter is presented in a strange way, jumping around in time, starting with a confrontation and then rewinding. I think it’s to introduce Natsume and Mikan right away for fans so they keep reading, but it makes things jumbled up. Natsume is as handsome and popular as ever, and quickly gets the attention of the Opera Troupe girls, but this excitement is dampened by Mikan’s enthusiastic arrival because oh dang he’s taken. 

That's right!

Mikan is excited to meet Hikari, because she loves Tsubasa, and it’s funny to see her speaking for herself and Natsume (because they are an item!), much to his chagrin, loudly proclaiming their joint appreciation for Tsubasa’s care. What I like about that is that Mikan and Natsume are a unit at this point, which is what makes her feel comfortable speaking for his feelings in the first place. “I” becomes “we.”

Hikari grabs onto this, that Mikan knows Tsubasa, and tries to get more information out of her. Mikan is affected by pretty faces, as we know, and Hikari is beautiful (or handsome? Since she’s characterized by a sense of masculinity in this story but honestly I've never read this manga in its entirety so I wouldn't really know), so she gets overwhelmed and Natsume ultimately ruins the mood again by stressing to Hikari that her brother wants her to leave.

I'm so delighted we can get back to NM content that makes me feel something!

Mikan scolds him for being harsh, though he claims he’s just not interested in sugarcoating. Hikari gets depressed and Mikan is again affected, though Natsume doesn’t like that. Then Thoma arrives, and the atmosphere between him and Natsume tenses, which spurs Mikan to ask what their relationship is. It could be simple curiosity or actual jealousy, whichever. If it is jealousy, then it’s interesting to note that the both of them are a little possessive of the other. Mikan certainly doesn’t seem to mind being monopolized by Natsume, but this could suggest she’s monopolizing him too. 

Natsume starts to leave and Mikan rushes after him. That makes me think that she could have been feeling jealousy, but mostly that she is just as intent on spending as much time together as he is. He can’t leave without her when she came to spend time with him! 

They are a married couple, even if they're not married yet.

When they leave, they’re joined by Narumi, who calls Natsume kind and thus gives Mikan a new impression of what he was doing with Hikari. It’s hard to tell with Natsume, honestly, because his kindness and cruelty all look the same. When Natsume confronts Naru by asking if Hikari was dragged into the school for Thoma’s sake, Naru denies it. Then he brings up the manipulative action of scouting Mikan for the Academy, leading to their meeting and falling in love. He turns to Mikan and asks if she thinks that was a mistake, coming to the Academy and meeting everyone.

It's refreshing to go back to "everyone" again, to remember the sheer number of people Mikan loves. Her alice stone was created by the thoughts of many loved ones, after all, not just Natsume, not just Hotaru. There is not just one name written on her heart.

She must no longer hide behind everyone or we... She can initiate affection like this. Isn't that amazing?

She grabs Natsume’s hand and says “Not at all!” looking him straight in the eyes, so he knows she’s telling him, “How could I regret something that brought me to you?” This makes it personal. Yes, she's happy to have met everyone else and they are all dear, but reassuring Natsume means letting him know how much he specifically matters to her. She trusts Narumi because she’s sure he has good intentions. After all, with everything that happened on her side of things, Narumi seems to have only been helpful. This is also a callback to Narumi requesting that Mikan have faith in him, despite his recent betrayal with the letters. Mikan chose to trust him then and never stopped. Natsume seems to cave, because he's weak when it comes to her, but he admonishes Naru for being manipulative.

Natsume then tells Mikan not to hang around Naru or Hikari anymore, just a little taste of what Natsume monopolizing Mikan looks like. He obviously knows that Mikan will not listen to that, but it’s his way of communicating that he dislikes Naru manipulating her or the way she behaved around Hikari. Mikan just says “huh?” though, so his message might not have gone through the way he liked.

Chapter Five

There’s not much I can analyze in Kageki that I didn’t already mention in Natsume’s version because they spend literally all their time together. On top of that, we get little of their perspectives, and mainly see them through Hikari’s eyes. So if this is short or minimal… oops.

Hikari is being stalked and bullied by Bear, and Natsume gets annoyed that she’s not angrier with him. This is a plot thing, but I always think of Mikan and how much I love her rage and how Higuchi ultimately drained her of all of it for the sake of being a smiley girl who makes everyone happy even to her own detriment. To me, he might be saying these words to Hikari, but he’s talking to Mikan too.

We're not just talking about Hikari, are we?

Mikan and Natsume are here as loving parents to pick Bear up from school, and Mikan is more focused on gathering Bear while Natsume is scolding Hikari. When Hikari’s cousin arrives to defend her, claiming that Hikari is just incredibly disciplined with her feelings, Natsume counters that she’s really just repressing them. (SOUNDS LIKE MIKAN!) I don’t think Natsume would be as adamant about this if it didn’t connect to Mikan. Maybe this is something they talk about, or something that will soon become a conversation. In any case, Mikan doesn’t seem to take any of what he’s saying personally, so maybe it’s not getting through to her.

In any case, Natsume goes a little overboard insulting Thoma, who instantly dismisses him by telling him to go home, which he does, but not before setting a fire that Mikan rushes to put out. After that, Mikan rushes after him. Because she has to be wherever he is. It's not just Natsume monopolizing her. It goes both ways.

There’s a big to-do about Hikari and Bear and anger and acting and Tsubasa, which I won’t get into mainly because I don’t really care. All that matters is Natsume using a non-burning fire and Mikan being impressed at the control he has over his alice. Like, "Wow, my boyfriend is so cool!"

Chapter 5.5 Omake

This omake takes place after Natsume was ordered to go home, so he and Mikan are doing just that, hand in hand. Where he goes, she goes, and vice versa. A clingy couple. 

GSHDFJHJKFGHKJDFJFHJFFJFGHSJFGDSHJFHAGSHK Thank you for listening to my Ted Talk.

Mikan asks what’s up with Natsume’s behavior with Thoma and Narumi pops out of the blue to explain that Natsume took her absence hard and that he strayed from the right path. Mikan is happy to see Naru; Natsume isn’t. All typical. But Mikan is confused because if Natsume skipped grades, shouldn’t that mean he was a good student and worked hard? And Naru says yes, that he did work hard, but by going on missions (THAT’S A CRIME NARUMI). Mikan is instantly concerned, because she watched him die once before and doesn’t ever want to experience that loss again, so Narumi assures her that none of the missions were at all physically taxing. That doesn’t eliminate her concern, though, until Natsume messes with her a little. 

In any case, Natsume re-enrolled as a high schooler when Mikan returned, so he could capitalize on her new presence. Mikan is excited to see Shiki and Narumi again when they appear, and they offer to show her Natsume’s middle school pics which she is excited to see until Natsume pulls her away, greedily. This chapter further teases Mikan and Natsume's rings, their inevitable wedding. Additionally, we see that there's some conversations yet to be had, particularly about what Natsume has been up to without her. She obviously wants to have these discussions, since she asks questions and then is so eager to see his middle school pictures, but it seems like Natsume is content now to completely leave that era in the past now that he has his girlfriend back.

Chapter Six

Mikan and the SA class are getting ready for the Culture Fest. Natsume complains about the Opera School students coming to visit the Academy campus during such a busy time, but he’s not really doing anything, so it feels unfair for him to say. 

Mikan doesn’t seem to mind that she’s being followed by a leech, and she teases him. She doesn't need him to help. He's just there so they can be together, and if he doesn't contribute anything, then that's fine too, as long as he's around. But the teasing never ends, because they wouldn't be NatsuMikan without it. This is crucial, because their bickering was never a cover-up for anything like it sometimes is for other bickering couples. For them, the bickering was always a relief. For Natsume, he could act immature and childish with someone when he’d been forced into a far more adult role in his life. For Mikan, it’s a way for her to cheer up when she’s feeling down, because bickering with him makes them both happy. The fact that they’re now officially a couple doesn’t eliminate the bickering, it just eliminates the pretense about it.

I'm sniffling...

Chapter 11.5 Omake

This is an outtake chapter surrounding Hikari searching for inspiration for her acting in a kiss scene. Tsubasa can’t help her for some reason, even though he’s in a relationship (inexplicably, his relationship is described as “new,” even though he and Misaki have been dating for like five years at this point). Thus, she must look elsewhere for romantic inspiration. And where better than Natsume and Mikan out and eating floating soft serve ice cream together?

She gets the ice cream all over her face and, since there’s nobody around, he licks it off her. She seems to find that silly and cute and laughs as he does so, though she is blushing. Will Mikan ever stop blushing around Natsume though? I don’t think so. It’s nice though that their affection is so reciprocal now. She doesn’t even freak out, really, which implies that there’s more intimacy to this extent happening away from the reader’s prying eyes. 

This was given to us because Higuchi felt bad about what she made us go through with the wretched final chapters. I appreciate the apology, actually, but I think we all agree we could use some more apologies of this nature.

They’re interrupted and it’s only then that Mikan freaks out, embarrassed to be seen doing something so weird. Very interesting! Maybe they'll work up to PDA status later. Nobody likes a voyeur, which is what the others are right now, but getting spied on while you're kissing is a little different than typical PDA. Who knows!

Conclusion

This is my last NM conclusion as far as I know now. How cute they are in this little spin-off manga! It lifts my spirits. Hopefully, seeing them all cutesy lifted your spirits too.

Anyway, friends, I'm genuinely remorseful that the last few parts of this essay were so negative and bitter. I'm usually not one to linger on those parts of GA. My mind is firmly rooted in various AU endings so I tend to be pretty chill about my feelings, but when I have to specifically address everything, it all comes to the surface and I get a little bitter. I'm really sorry it had to be that way.

In any case, despite the bitterness towards the end, writing this essay was genuinely a blast for me. It was nice to put my feelings about this manga into words.

I started writing this essay on April 12, 2015 (which means I was sixteen at the time). I always knew the exact order I'd write this essay in, because my main motivation in analyzing GA was to present my thesis about Mikan genuinely being in love with Natsume. Back then, I'd seen one too many tumblr posts about Mikan being "obligated" to be with Natsume because he was dying or because of comphet or because Natsume scared her or silly things like that and it pissed me off. Additionally, I was bombarded with people calling Mikan a Mary Sue or disregarding her character. I remember seeing posts like that in the dark ages and thinking, "Did these people even read the manga? Do they even pay attention to Mikan?"

I'd see those posts and roll my eyes. I'd read a grossly OOC Mikan in a fic and sigh exasperatedly. I'd see people disparaging her and I'd disapprove. I'd know deep down that Mikan does love Natsume and that she's much more than people are leading on. I knew they were wrong, but I more or less left it at that.

But then I'd ask myself what exactly it was that they were missing and I'd have to confront the fact that I was thinking based on vibes and "just because" and there's no evidence in that. Was I paying much attention to her either? So one day, probably in between ranting to Zoe, I opened up a Google Doc and decided I'd do the hard work and analyze the whole fucking manga to prove my point. Besides, there was no real analysis for NM out there, so I'd take one for the team and do it. But it wasn't enough to analyze NM. There's too much going on there to leave it to one essay.

After all, most people think of anime scenes when they think of the earlier chapters, and that's not accurate, so I'd have to distinguish between the anime and the manga. But it's not enough to simply distinguish! The anime contains scenes worth discussing, since NM is pretty different there. Thus, the essay had to be divided between manga and anime. But that wasn't enough, either, because analyzing Natsume and Mikan's feelings in one essay was sure to give me a headache, which means this project had to be three parts, and Mikan had to be last. She always had to be last, my grand finale to prove that she was no Mary Sue, that her love for Natsume was built up from the beginning, and that she had depth and growth that should be appreciated.

It is now July 27, 2023 at around 11 PM. I'm now finished.

Altogether, across all three essays, I wrote about 243,240 words about NatsuMikan. Hundreds of pages in my Google Docs. This would be a huge book. And if anyone out there read all of it? You're a damn trooper. I appreciate you so much.

To all my readers, the ones who stuck with me from the beginning, or the ones who find it long after I press post on this last one, the ones who read each word, or the ones who skimmed to the analysis of their favorite scenes, I thank you. To everyone who left a comment, I thank you. To everyone who reached out to tell me their thoughts, I thank you. To @crimsoncitrus for helping me out with plenty of the translations throughout this process, thank you! To @thesightofworms, for being my favorite person to rant to about GA, I very much thank you. And to Higuchi Tachibana, I thank you. I do have beef with some of your choices, but creating manga is no small feat and you wrote 180 chapters for us to consume and I am beyond grateful that you have created something so enduring and important to me, something I have never been able to move on from.

I have loved GA since I was twelve years old and I show no signs of stopping. This is just one labor of love of many to come. I'll never shut up about this manga. Today I finish a very long project that I've had on my mind since I was a teenager. Tomorrow I'll pursue another. I can't imagine I'll ever stop coming up with projects for GA. :)

Took me long enough, but we're done now! I love you all. Have a wonderful day <3

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[thornyrose463]

The Transfers (Riverdale one-shot)

This is a Riverdale (CW TV show) one-shot. The gifs are not mine. I found them here on tumblr. All credit goes to the rightful owners.

I would like to thank @amazingphanisnotonfire-imagines​ for making an Instagram profile for my original character Hannah Pearson.

Summary: Hannah Pearson is a member of the Southside Serpents and Sweet Pea's girlfriend. After Southside High shuts down, she transfers to Riverdale High with the other Serpents.

Rating: T

Warning: Swearing and mild sexual content

Cast

Cole Sprouse as Jughead Jones

Vanessa Morgan as Toni Topaz

Jordan Connor as Sweet Pea

Willa Holland as Hannah Pearson

Drew Ray Tanner as Fangs Fogarty

Camila Mendes as Veronica Lodge

KJ Apa as Archie Andrews

Madelaine Petsch as Cheryl Blossom

Charles Melton as Reggie Mantle

Lili Reinhart as Betty Cooper

Skeet Ulrich as FP Jones

Danielle Campbell as Emma Walker

Author's note

This one-shot is set in an alternate universe where Jughead didn't break up with Betty after she did the Serpent dance, Jughead and Toni never kissed, the Black Hood got Betty to choose his victims but didn't make her end her relationship with Jughead and her friendship with Veronica, Archie and Veronica didn't break up and Veronica didn't start dating Reggie, Alice, Polly, Cheryl, Kevin, Toni, Fangs, and Principal Weatherbee never joined the Farm, the Farm never kidnapped Betty, Toni, Cheryl, and Fangs were never kicked out of the Serpents, the Pretty Poisons don't exist, Toni and Cheryl didn't break up, Jughead and the rest of the Serpents didn't start playing Gryphons and Gargoyles, FP and Alice never dated or had an affair, the Stonewall Prep storyline never happened, and Principal Honey was never hired.

On the Heathers casting sheet, which you can find on Riverdale showrunner Roberto Aguirre-Sacasa's Twitter page, Sweet Pea wrote the initials NM, and Fangs wrote the initials FF. Based on that, we can assume Sweet Pea's first name starts with the letter N and his last name starts with the letter M and Fangs' first name and last name start with the letter F. I chose the name Nathan Montgomery for Sweet Pea and the name Francis Fogarty for Fangs.

Jughead Jones led Toni Topaz, Sweet Pea, Hannah Pearson, Fangs Fogarty, and the rest of the Southside Serpents through the doors of Riverdale High School. Sweet Pea gripped Hannah's hand tightly as they walked down the hallway. Toni and Fangs walked beside Sweet Pea and Hannah, glaring at anyone who looked at them the wrong way.

The Serpents stopped walking when they saw the table that Veronica Lodge, her boyfriend, Archie Andrews, and Kevin Keller were standing behind.

Veronica smiled. "Friends! On behalf of the students and faculty here at Riverdale High, welcome to your new school! To ease this transition, I've set up a registration desk, where you can get your locker assignments, class schedules, and a list of sports and extracurriculars. We encourage each and every one of you to drink deeply from the cup that is fair Riverdale."

"Stand down, Eva Perón!" Cheryl Blossom yelled, walking down the stairs, followed by Reggie Mantle and a group of girls in blue and gold cheerleading uniforms.

Veronica sighed and looked at Jughead before facing Cheryl.

"There's the school spirit I so fondly remember," Jughead said sarcastically.

"Cheryl." Veronica acknowledged, glaring at the redheaded girl. "No one invited Fascist Barbie to the party."

"Wrong, Veronica. No one invited Southside scum to our school." Cheryl said, crossing her arms over her chest.

The Serpents tensed.

"Listen up, ragamuffins!" Cheryl yelled.

"Ragamuffins? What kind of insult is that?" Hannah asked.

Hannah was tall and slender. Her long brown hair was parted in the middle and styled in loose curls. She was wearing an unzipped black leather jacket with the Southside Serpents symbol on the back, an unbuttoned long-sleeved green and white plaid flannel shirt over a white tank top, dark blue denim jeans, and black combat boots with black laces. She had on a light amount of black eyeliner, a light amount of black mascara, and soft brown eyeshadow. Her lip balm was a pretty peach colour. She had a double-headed snake tattoo on her left arm, but it couldn't be seen underneath her jacket. She didn't have any other tattoos besides her Serpent tattoo. She didn't have any scars or birthmarks. She didn't have any piercings.

Hannah was 16 years old. She joined the Serpents when she was 15. She did her Serpent dance to Warrant's song Cherry Pie. She lost her virginity to a guy her age one night at a party shortly after she joined the Serpents. They weren't romantically involved. It was just a hookup, nothing more. At some point, she and Sweet Pea realized they were attracted to one another and started dating.

Cheryl looked at Hannah with raised eyebrows and then started speaking again. "I will not allow Riverdale High's above average GPA to suffer because of classrooms that are overcrowded with underachievers, so please do us all a favour and find some other school to debase with your hard-scrabble ways." She looked the Serpents up and down with a fake smile on her cherry red lips and held her hands together in front of her.

"Why don't you come over here and say that to my face?" Toni asked angrily, moving towards Cheryl. Jughead, Sweet Pea, Hannah, and Fangs followed her, ready to fight.

Cheryl got in Toni's face. "Happily, Queen of the Buskers."

"She is just asking to get her ass kicked," Hannah muttered to Sweet Pea. She was about to lunge at Cheryl, but he grabbed her arm and pulled her back.

"Okay, guys, can we just put our differences aside and start over?" Archie stood in between Toni and Cheryl. Hannah's gaze went from being focused on Cheryl to being focused on him. "A clean slate?" He looked between Cheryl and the Serpents.

"You don't speak for the Bulldogs, Andrews, and need I remind you that these greaser snakes showed up at your place trying to kick your ass," Reggie said, giving Archie a pointed look.

"Happy to finish what we started." Sweet Pea threatened, shoving past Toni and moving towards Reggie. He stopped in his tracks when he felt Fangs and Jughead's arms hold him back.

Veronica stood in between Reggie and Sweet Pea, putting a hand on Sweet Pea's left arm. "I'm so over the toxic masculinity in this hallway right now," she said loudly, her voice full of annoyance.

"All right, that's enough pomp and circumstance! Everyone, get to class now!" Principal Weatherbee yelled.

Reggie backed off.

Veronica took her hand off of Sweet Pea's arm. He began to walk towards the staircase. Jughead shoved him, causing him to pick up the pace. He could make out the rustling of papers as he and the rest of the Serpents walked down the hallway.

"Stupid Northsiders," Sweet Pea grumbled.

"It's okay, babe. Everything will get better." Hannah said, rubbing Sweet Pea's arm and getting him to calm down. "And if it doesn't, we'll just kick their asses," she added. He laughed.

Hannah walked into the math classroom. Math was her last class of the day. Once the clock struck 3, she would be able to get on her motorcycle and go back to her trailer.

None of the other Serpents had math at this time of day besides Jughead, who was sitting next to a girl with fair skin, blue eyes, and long straight blonde hair tied up in a high ponytail wearing a white t-shirt, an unbuttoned pink cardigan, dark blue denim jeans, and beige ankle-length boots.

The girl was named Elizabeth Cooper. She was Jughead's girlfriend. Hannah met her at FP's retirement party. She was as sweet as apple pie and was one of the few Northsiders Hannah could stand to be around.

Hannah sat on the other side of Jughead and smiled at Betty. "Hey, Betty."

Betty smiled back. "Hey, Hannah."

The teacher wrote an equation on the whiteboard and explained it to the class.

Hannah listened intently while writing in her notebook. Despite what people like Cheryl and Reggie may think, she was actually pretty smart and cared about getting an education.

The clock struck 3, and Hannah left the classroom and walked out to the parking lot. She got on her motorcycle and drove to her trailer.

Betty laid in her bed, cell phone in hand, browsing Instagram. The name Hannah Pearson showed up in the list of suggested followers. She tapped on Hannah's profile picture and checked out her profile. Hannah had 99 posts and 85 followers and was following 100 people. At the top of the page, there were pictures of Hannah, a picture of Hannah's black Honda CB550 motorcycle, and a picture of the outside of the Whyte Wyrm.

Betty scrolled down the page and saw a close-up of the Serpent tattoo on Hannah's left arm, pictures of Hannah and Sweet Pea, and pictures of Hannah, Toni, and Fangs. She couldn't help but smile at how cute Hannah and Sweet Pea were together and how close Hannah and her friends were.

Betty hit the follow button. A few minutes later, she got a notification saying that Hannah had followed her.

A few weeks had passed since the Serpents transferred to Riverdale High. The Bulldogs and the Serpents had been in their fair share of fights, and Principal Weatherbee had banned the Serpents from wearing their leather jackets and showing their tattoos. Sweet Pea had to wear a turtleneck in order to cover his tattoo, much to the amusement of the rest of the Serpents.

Hannah was talking to Fangs in the student lounge. She stifled a laugh as Sweet Pea walked in. "You look great, babe."

Fangs turned around and burst into laughter.

Sweet Pea was wearing a white turtleneck underneath an unbuttoned blue and white plaid flannel shirt with long sleeves, dark blue denim jeans, and black combat boots with black laces.

"Shut the fuck up," Sweet Pea grumbled, making his way over to Hannah.

Hannah tried to conceal her smile. "It suits you."

Hannah was wearing a grey tank top underneath an unbuttoned red and grey plaid flannel shirt with long sleeves, dark blue denim jeans, and black ankle-length leather boots with silver studs on the buckles. Her long brown hair was styled in loose curls. She had on a light amount of black eyeliner, a light amount of black mascara, and soft brown eyeshadow. Her lip balm was a pretty peach colour.

Fangs smiled. "Yeah. It...Um…It brings out the colour of your eyes."

Sweet Pea shoved Fangs.

"It's really not that bad. I've seen Fangs wear much worse." Hannah said.

"Hey!" Fangs exclaimed, offended.

Hannah kissed Sweet Pea. "You would look good in anything, I promise."

"Thanks, but that doesn't make me feel any better." Sweet Pea said.

"Are you guys busy tonight?" Fangs asked.

Sweet Pea shook his head. "No."

"Do you want to go see Love, Simon at the Bijou with me?" Fangs asked.

"I was going to invite Toni, but she's too busy trying to get with Cheryl Bombshell." Fangs rolled his eyes.

"Sounds like fun. We'll be there." Hannah told Fangs.

That night, Sweet Pea, Hannah, and Fangs arrived at the Bijou in Sweet Pea's truck. Sweet Pea held Hannah's hand as they walked in and found their seats.

Fangs nudged Sweet Pea and Hannah. "Guys, look."

Sweet Pea and Hannah turned around.

Toni was sitting next to Cheryl. She made a flirtatious comment, causing Cheryl to blush.

Hannah smiled. "Aww, how cute!"

Cheryl and Toni became a couple a few weeks after their date.

Principal Weatherbee lifted the ban on Serpent jackets and Serpent tattoos, and the Serpents started wearing their jackets to school again.

Betty and Jughead lost their virginity.

Hannah stood beside Sweet Pea, laughing at something stupid he had said. Fangs was on the other side of him. Jughead was in front of them. She looked around the park and saw Cheryl standing next to Toni and laughing. She smiled.

Jughead's father, FP Jones, whistled, getting the attention of the Serpents.

"Listen up, now! All right, listen up!" FP yelled.

"Some 60 years ago, the very first Serpent meeting took place on these same riverbanks. Now, it makes sense that this is where we gather now, where I…Where I say my goodbye. Jughead, would you step up here, son?" FP asked.

The crowd started muttering.

"What the fuck is going on?" Hannah whispered to Sweet Pea.

Hannah was wearing her black leather jacket with the Southside Serpents symbol on the back, an unbuttoned long-sleeved blue and black plaid flannel shirt over a black tank top, dark blue denim jeans, and black ankle-length leather boots with silver studs on the buckles. She had on a light amount of black eyeliner, a light amount of black mascara, and soft brown eyeshadow. Her lip balm was a pretty peach colour. Her hair was straight.

"I have no idea. To be honest, I thought we came here to get drunk and celebrate how far we've come." Sweet Pea said.

Hannah laughed.

Jughead walked towards FP.

"What are you doing?" Jughead mumbled.

"What I should have done a long time ago," FP muttered.

"I'm retiring from the Serpents." FP announced. The muttering got louder. "For real this time."

FP put his arm around Jughead's shoulder. "Now, my boy has never stopped fighting for this crew. Hell, he almost died for it." He turned to face his son. "That's why I'm giving you the mantle."

The crowd cheered. Sweet Pea hit Fangs, making him wince.

"And now, as your first official duty as Serpent King…" FP nodded to Toni, who made her way towards FP and Jughead and handed FP a red leather jacket with the Southside Serpents symbol on the back.

"I think you know what to do with this." FP handed the jacket to his son. Jughead smiled.

"All right, all right," Jughead muttered. "All I can say is…I love you, Dad. And the Serpents will not die out. Not on my watch."

The crowd cheered.

Cheryl walked towards Jughead, and they smiled at each other as he gave her the red leather jacket.

"Welcome to the Serpents, Cheryl." Hannah said.

Cheryl smiled at Hannah before making her way over to Toni and kissing her.

"One more thing." Jughead pulled out his cell phone. "We have a new Serpent Queen." He called Betty.

Fangs started dating a girl named Emma Walker.

Emma was a Northsider. She was on the cheerleading squad with Betty, Veronica, Cheryl, and Toni. There were no other Serpents on the cheerleading squad besides Toni.

Jughead finished writing Anatomy of a Murder, his book on Jason Blossom's death and the effect it had on the people of Riverdale. It made it to the top of the New York Times Best Seller list.

After their lunch date at Pop's, Sweet Pea and Hannah went back to his trailer.

Hannah walked into Sweet Pea's bedroom. Sweet Pea followed her. He shut the door.

Hannah took off her black combat boots, dark blue denim jeans, black t-shirt, and Serpent jacket, leaving her in just her black lingerie.

Sweet Pea left a trail of kisses on the side of Hannah's neck, rubbing his hands up and down her legs. Hannah groaned in pleasure, taking off Sweet Pea's clothes, leaving him in just his boxers.

Hannah straddled Sweet Pea's body as they laid on top of the bed. She kissed down his body, creeping closer to his boxers. Sweet Pea flipped them over so that he was on top. The two kissed each other all over as they made love.

Sweet Pea and Hannah collapsed on the bed next to each other.

"You up for round 2?" Sweet Pea asked.

Hannah rolled on top of Sweet Pea. "Definitely."

At the beginning of junior year, Hal and Alice got divorced, Emma and Fangs lost their virginity, Hiram and Hermione got divorced, FP became the sheriff of Riverdale, Veronica opened a speakeasy in the basement of Pop's, Cheryl lost her virginity to Toni, Hal and Hiram were sentenced to life in prison, Alice and FP's son, Charles Smith, shut down the Farm, Hermione got people to stop playing Gryphons and Gargoyles, burned every single copy of the player's handbook, and arrested the Gargoyle Gang, Gladys and Jellybean moved back to Toledo, Fangs' mother succumbed to her illness, Toni's grandfather died of old age, and Pop Tate died of old age.

After the fall of the Gargoyle Gang, a new gang arrived in Riverdale. They were called the Scorpions. Each member wore a black leather jacket with a big red scorpion on the back. They dealt drugs and street raced for sport, just like the Ghoulies had.

The Serpents and the Scorpions were enemies.

At the beginning of senior year, Fred died in a hit-and-run accident after stopping alongside the road to help a stranded motorist.

Friday, June 21, 2019

It was the night of the senior prom.

The dance was being held at the Five Seasons.

Veronica, Betty, Cheryl, Hannah, and Emma had gotten ready for the dance at Betty's house.

The limo Veronica had rented pulled into Betty's driveway.

Archie, Jughead, Toni, Sweet Pea, and Fangs stepped out of the limo and stood in the driveway, waiting for Veronica, Betty, Cheryl, Hannah, and Emma to step out of the house.

Archie was wearing a black suit, a white dress shirt, a black necktie, and black dress shoes with black laces.

Jughead was wearing a black suit, a white dress shirt, a black necktie, and black dress shoes with black laces. His beanie rested on top of his head.

Toni was wearing black high-heeled sandals and a strapless black dress with a floor-length skirt. The sweetheart neckline showed a hint of cleavage. Her long brown hair with pink highlights was styled in loose curls. The curls were pushed out of her face but still left to fall down her back. She had on a light amount of black eyeliner, a light amount of black mascara, and soft brown eyeshadow. Her lip balm was a light shade of berry pink.

Sweet Pea was wearing a black suit, a white dress shirt, a black necktie, and black dress shoes with black laces. The first two buttons of his shirt were undone. His Serpent tattoo was on full display.

Fangs was wearing a black suit, a white dress shirt, a black necktie, and black dress shoes with black laces.

Archie's jaw dropped when he saw Veronica walking towards him. "Wow. You look stunning."

Veronica was wearing navy blue high-heeled sandals and a navy blue floor-length dress. It was strapless and had a sweetheart neckline. The neckline showed a hint of cleavage. The top was folded pieces of soft fabric, and the bottom billowed when she walked, giving her the appearance that she was flying. A small silver chain with a tiny diamond hung low on her chest. Her shoulder-length wavy black hair was in an elegant updo, leaving her neck bare. Her brown eyes were framed by long dark lashes, her lips were plum and shiny, and her cheeks were rosy.

Veronica smiled and gave Archie a peck on the lips. "Thank you, Archie."

Archie walked towards the limo. Veronica walked beside him. He held the door open and took her by the hand, helping her get in the backseat.

Jughead's jaw dropped when he saw Betty walking towards him. "Wow. You look incredible."

Betty was wearing pale pink high-heeled sandals and a pale pink dress with a floor-length skirt and a sweetheart neckline that turned into off-the-shoulder sleeves. The neckline showed a hint of cleavage. A small silver chain with a tiny diamond hung low on her chest. Her long blonde hair was styled in barrel curls. The curls were pushed out of her face but still left to fall down her back. She had on a light amount of black eyeliner, a light amount of black mascara, soft pink eyeshadow, and nude lip gloss.

Betty smiled and gave Jughead a peck on the lips. "Thank you, Jughead."

Jughead walked towards the limo. Betty walked beside him. He held the door open and took her by the hand, helping her get in the backseat.

Toni's jaw dropped when she saw Cheryl walking towards her. "Wow. You look beautiful."

Cheryl was wearing red high-heeled sandals and a red dress with spaghetti straps, a v-neck, and a floor-length skirt with a slit in the right side that reached the middle of the thigh and revealed her right leg. The neckline showed a hint of cleavage. A small silver chain with a tiny diamond hung low on her chest. Her long red hair was styled in barrel curls. The curls were pushed out of her face but still left to fall down her back. She had on a light amount of black eyeliner, a light amount of black mascara, and soft pink eyeshadow. Her lips were cherry red.

Cheryl smiled and gave Toni a peck on the lips. "Thank you, Toni."

Toni and Cheryl walked towards the limo. Toni held the door open and took Cheryl by the hand, helping her get in the backseat.

When Sweet Pea saw Hannah walking towards him, his jaw dropped. "Wow. You look amazing."

Hannah was wearing green high-heeled sandals and a green dress with a v-neck, two spaghetti straps criss-crossing over the open back, and a floor-length skirt. The neckline showed a hint of cleavage. The sides of the dress were cut out, exposing a teasing fraction of skin. Her Serpent tattoo was on full display. Her long brown hair was styled in loose curls. The curls were pushed out of her face but still left to fall down her back. She had on a light amount of black eyeliner, a light amount of black mascara, and soft brown eyeshadow. Her lip balm was a pretty peach colour.

Hannah smiled and gave Sweet Pea a peck on the lips. "Thank you, Sweet Pea."

Sweet Pea walked towards the limo. Hannah walked beside him. He held the door open and took her by the hand, helping her get in the backseat.

When Fangs saw Emma walking towards him, his jaw dropped. "Wow. You look gorgeous."

Emma was tall and slender with fair skin and blue eyes. She was wearing lavender high-heeled sandals and a strapless lavender dress with a sweetheart neckline, an open back, and a floor-length skirt that flared at the hips with a small train. The neckline showed a hint of cleavage. Her long brown hair was styled in barrel curls. The curls were pushed out of her face but still left to fall down her back. She had on a light amount of black eyeliner, a light amount of black mascara, and soft pink eyeshadow. Her lip balm was a pretty coral pink colour.

Emma smiled and gave Fangs a peck on the lips. "Thank you, Fangs."

Fangs walked towards the limo. Emma walked beside him. He held the door open and took her by the hand, helping her get in the backseat.

The limo drove down the road.

Riverdale High School

Wednesday, June 26, 2019

2:00 p.m.

It was graduation day.

The ceremony was being held in the auditorium. The graduates were sitting in the first row. They were clad in blue graduation gowns and blue graduation caps with gold tassels. The guests were sitting a little farther back.

Betty was the valedictorian. She walked up to the podium and gave a speech.

"Have you ever read a good book or a good story, and when you're on the final chapter and the final page, you feel a sadness you can't explain?"

"Sometimes, if you're lucky, the story or book will have an epilogue or a sequel. I stand here before you, my fellow graduates, to tell you that although this chapter in our lives has ended, the story is far from over."

"We are all still so young. We have time to fall in and out of love and to make mistakes. We still have the opportunity to fail and succeed and to change our minds like we change our clothes. There are tears of sadness running down some of your faces. Why? This isn't the end. This is the beginning of something amazing."

"For some of you, maybe it's college. Maybe it's your dream job. Maybe it's getting married and starting a family. Or maybe it's finally accepting who you are and not being afraid of who you could turn out to be."

"Just promise me one thing. Don't forget what these past few years have brought to your life. Don't forget about the people that taught you all about friendship, bravery, and courage. Don't forget about the smiles and frowns, the laughter and tears, and the breakups and makeups. Don't run from your mistakes. Learn from them and embrace them. I wish you all the happiness in the world. I can't think of a group of people that deserve it more."

Thunderous applause followed Betty's speech.

Betty returned to her seat.

Principal Weatherbee announced that diplomas were going to be handed out. He started calling names.

"Archibald Andrews."

Archie made his way towards the stage. He shook hands with Principal Weatherbee and the superintendent of the school board before taking his diploma back to his seat.

A few more names were called.

"Cheryl Blossom."

Cheryl made her way towards the stage. She shook hands with Principal Weatherbee and the superintendent of the school board before taking her diploma back to her seat.

A few more names were called.

"Elizabeth Cooper."

Betty made her way towards the stage. She shook hands with Principal Weatherbee and the superintendent of the school board before taking her diploma back to her seat.

A few more names were called.

"Francis Fogarty."

Fangs made his way towards the stage. He shook hands with Principal Weatherbee and the superintendent of the school board before taking his diploma back to his seat.

A few more names were called.

"Forsythe Pendleton Jones III."

Jughead made his way towards the stage. He shook hands with Principal Weatherbee and the superintendent of the school board before taking his diploma back to his seat.

A few more names were called.

"Veronica Lodge."

Veronica made her way towards the stage. She shook hands with Principal Weatherbee and the superintendent of the school board before taking her diploma back to her seat.

A few more names were called.

"Nathan Montgomery."

Sweet Pea made his way towards the stage. He shook hands with Principal Weatherbee and the superintendent of the school board before taking his diploma back to his seat.

A few more names were called.

"Hannah Pearson."

Hannah made her way towards the stage. She shook hands with Principal Weatherbee and the superintendent of the school board before taking her diploma back to her seat.

A few more names were called.

"Antoinette Topaz."

Toni made her way towards the stage. She shook hands with Principal Weatherbee and the superintendent of the school board before taking her diploma back to her seat.

A few more names were called.

"Emma Walker."

Emma was the last to graduate. She made her way towards the stage. She shook hands with Principal Weatherbee and the superintendent of the school board before taking her diploma back to her seat.

Principal Weatherbee addressed the crowd. "Everyone, please rise."

The crowd stood up.

Principal Weatherbee turned to the graduates and said, "Graduates, please move your tassels from right to left."

The graduates did as they were told.

"Congratulations to the Riverdale High School class of 2019!" Principal Weatherbee exclaimed.

The graduates threw their caps in the air.

THE END

[thejwilightzone]

Asks 1-25

T u r d y I typed all this out and then Tumblr crashed so I had to retype it. Press F

1. Song of the year?

One I forgot to mention in the other ask is A Cowboy's Work is Never Done. 10/10 jam

2. Album of the year?

Weezer's Teal Album

3. Favorite musical artist / group you started listening to this year?

Along with the ones mentioned in the last ask, various older artists from the 70s/80s/90s tbh

4. Movie of the year?

Point Break. Hippie surfers + bank robbing + cheesy 90s movie production = top tier comedy

5. TV show of the year?

The End of the F***ing World, specifically season 2

6. Episode of tv or webisode that defined the year for you?

Last episode of TEOTFW season 2, but the whole season is iconic

7. Favorite actor of the year?

Me because I'm always acting a fool

8. Game of the year?

M i n e c r a f t

9. Best month for you this year?

May/June but also August was pretty good

10. Something that made you cry this year?

The 24 MPH speed limit sign in Albuquerque NM

11. Something you want to do again next year?

Hang out with you and wreak havoc

12. Talk about a new friend you made this year

Does the drunk Russian boy at the pool count?

13. How was your birthday this year?

It was gr8 I read the worst book ever, drove around and ate good food

14. Favorite book you read this year?

Strange the Dreamer or Call Down the Hawk. A Darker Shade of Magic was pretty good too.

15. What’s a bad habit you picked up this year?

None, I'm still rocking last year's bad habits.

16. Post a picture from the beginning of the year

C h i c k e n s from when I house-sat for a friend.

17. Post a picture from the end of the year

My dog living her best life in the snow.

19. What’re you excited about for next year?

Ice skating lessons and traveling more.

18. A memorable meal this year?

Grilled cheese while playing Mario Kart at your house ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

20. What’s something you learned this year?

Just how big the USA is.

21. What’s something new about your place of residence (room, home, or general location) now vs the start of the year?

It's messier.

22. Favorite place you visited this year?

California was pretty. NC was cool too ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

23. If you could send a message to yourself back on the first day of the year, what would it be?

Always haggle.

24. Did you keep any New Year’s Resolutions?

I didn't have any so nope ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

25. Did you create any characters (in games, art, or writing) this year? Describe one

I made a ton of them for a new writing project. One of them is a serial killer :^)

T h a n k

[otakucalsama]

cal’s bella x other vampires fic recs

hello! this is cal here (obviously) and i’m just reposting this. i made it a while back, but the links didn’t work, so now i’m redoing it. this time, i’m going to make it smaller, with more posts, instead of larger in one post. so without further ado, here is my bella x the other vampires fic recs. also, this is only for completed fics, so if you have a story i didn’t add (that’s complete) send me a link and i’ll read it and then decide whether to add it or not. i will not, however, take any bella x edward, bella x jasper, or bella x jacob fics.

other fic recs here

last updated- 12/3/19

j a m e s x b e l l a

i. enchanting by simply-aly / t / >1k, one-shot / complete

All it takes is a butterfly light kiss.

ii. for always, forever by dazzled620 / t / 3-4k, one-shot / complete

Bella comes to Forks, and lies. About everything. She still gets together with Edward. But what happens when she sees someone while playing baseball with the Cullens? Who will she choose? Oneshot for now. BellaxJames.

r i l e y x b e l l a

i. love me by x.safety.pins.x / m 1-2k, one-shot / complete

Based off of the song by JJ Heller, read about the intertwinig stories of three different souls, a child abuse survivor, a ex-bulimic divorced wife, and a convict. Song-fic R/B E/T Do not read if you’re under 14.

ii. meant to be by bitemytongue / m / 15-20k, one-shot / complete

Bella never thought she would forget the first time she got married, but she did. After 10 years of not seeing her former childhood friend and husband, she meets him again. Only a few months after Edward’s departure she doesn’t think she’s ready to fall in love again, but Riley is more than happy to prove her wrong. M for Violence

p e t e r x b e l l a

i. perfect melody by bitemytongue / m / 15-20k, one-shot / complete

Pushing past a horrific past Bella Swan finally knows who she is and knows she never wants to see the Cullen Coven ever again. Meeting a red-eyed vampire doesn’t faze her at all, but eventually she realizes she’s fallen in love with yet another vampire. Only this time she knows their love is real and nothing and no one will break them apart. Hopefully.

g a r r e t t x b e l l a

i. the rebel soldier and his little lady by laurie whitlock / m / 45-50k, multi-chaptered / complete

One day while looking for “their” meadow, Bella comes face to face with a red eyed vampire but this one is not looking to kill her nor does he only want her for her blood. AU

n a h u e l x b e l l a

i. unseen events by whitewolflegend / m / 45-50k, multi-chaptered / complete

Bella finds her self in South America, near the Amazon to be exact. She finds more than what she expected when she has to run for her safety, finding out about vampires was one thing, werewolves for another, but what happens when she finds out about Half Breeds and finds Nahuel… Will he help her or will he leave her? Ra:M

e l e a z a r x b e l l a

i. recognition by lj summers / t / 4-5k, one-shot / complete

NM AU. Edward fought for Bella’s humanity – and lost. While his body burned, Bella was changed by Eleazar, Gift-Sensor of the Volturi Guard, losing her memories in the process. Would she regain her memories and her sorrow, or build something new?

[sargenthouse]

Interview: Jaye Jayle on the web // Echoes and Dust

Interview: Jaye Jayle 

on the web: Facebook // Bandcamp

In a fantasy world it would be just making records and making songs in world of people who spend their night lives when the sun goes down, the kids go to sleep and they’re laying in their bed or sitting on their couch they don’t turn on the TV and scroll through netflix or look at their phone. They put on a record and take it in and breathe and feel something that you don’t feel in any other world besides that world.

Full interview by Michael Hayden via Echoes and Dust.

My first experience with Jaye Jayle was seeing them live opening for Oathbreaker. It seems like their blend of americana, kraut-rock grooves and Morricone-esque soundtracking would be an odd fit for a metal show, their presence and weightiness stole the show for me. I was so impressed by their performance that I became a bit obsessed with both their debut album House Cricks and Other Excuses to Get Out and their outstanding split release with Emma Ruth Rundle The Time Between Us. I didn’t know at the time (even though he looked familiar) that the main songwriter was Evan Patterson from the mighty Young Widows. As a fan of Young Widows this just intrigued m even more. How does a person go from the thunder and fury of Young Widows to the dark, moody and tension filled music of Jaye Jayle? When the opportunity to interview Evan about their upcoming album No Trail and Other Unholy Paths (available June 29th via Sargent House) I jumped at the chance to hear more about this intriguingly unique project.

We planned on talking after their set opening for Russian Circles at the Empty Bottle here in Chicago. Evan immediately strikes you as a warm and engaged person, he gives everyone who approaches him his undivided attention. It seemed like no matter where we went to begin the interview he was being approached by old friends, acquaintances or newly made fans and he always took the time to share some words with them. I was really impressed by his kindness towards strangers and his patience when confronted with some of Chicago’s more exuberant drunks. The conversation that followed was a real pleasure to have and I’m even more of a fan of the band now that I’ve spent some time hearing about it’s genesis and evolution.

(((o))): How did Jaye Jayle get born out of Young Widows?

Evan Patterson: The initial thought of the project or the idea of writing songs outside of Young Widows was just to not think about anything in capacity of it being performed. It was just kind of writing songs casually. I was actually in Santa Fe, NM visiting a past partner. She had a parlour guitar that was all fucked up, the bridge was already pulling away and the only thing I could do was kind of play on the last five frets to get it to stay in tune. I decided I was just going to write a song or what I felt was a song. It was always just a couple of minutes or a couple of parts. Not a deliberate idea of anything, just kind of a stream of consciousness thing.

(((o))): Previously did you write with a more compositional approach?

Evan: A little bit, once the band becomes involved in a project or any kind of composition or songwriting to me it makes to consider that they are there. There’s Jaye Jayle songs that I work that have no base of anyone playing with me and when we get together and play them they just come out how they are. One the band becomes involved it’s adding the saturation or the color to the song.

(((o))): That kind of my addresses my follow up question. I know that you’re the main songwriter but do you bring raw ideas to the band and let them play to their strengths or do you dictate who does what?

Evan: It’s a bit of a compositional dictatorship in the songwriting process until we get to the pinnacle moment of a song or a piece. I say here’s all the ideas I have and here’s the drum beat and this is where I hear the bass to be and this is where I hear the vocal melody and once it all becomes musical, that’s where the freedom sets in. Then we can say “this section of song is open” but it takes a long time to get to that place but those guys are

(((o))): You have some great players.

Evan: Todd (Cook) is my favorite bass player to ever live on the face of the planet and Neal (Argabright) can play keyboards better than anyone else. Todd and Neal don’t want to be soloists, they want to be part of the composition rather than just doing the same thing or wondering when they get to take the lead. There’s no leads. It’s more of a score.

(((o))): It’s interesting to me that a lot the press around you guys bring up the kraut-rock kind of influences and I hear it a bit but when I think about bands like say Can often times the song is just a really long guitar solo. I hear it in more of say Michael Rother’s (Neu!) solo stuff where all of the instruments are placed well, or contributing to the whole piece.

Evan: When I listen to Can I don’t really listen to the guitar work as much as I do the forward motion of the songs rather than it just being parts. When a Can song starts you kind of know it’s not going to leave. You always know when you hear the beginning of a Can song if that’s going to be the Can song you want to listen to or if you don’t want to listen and that’s usually in the rhythm section.

(((o))): So the new album is produced by Dean Hurley(David Lynch’s sound collaborator). I love Twin Peaks and the sound design has always been a big part of that, especially in the most recent season. How did working with him come about?

Evan: That sound design is all Dean. I actually had no idea about any of his collaborations with David Lynch until I heard Lynch’s album ‘The Big Dream’ and I’m such a fan of that record. Something about the way it incorporated modern music and that Twin Peaks sound, everything about that. I associated with so much of what’s going on with that record, maybe at times not melodically or vocally what was going on but the production of it completely surrounded me. So I saw that Dean Hurley worked on, produced and co-wrote the record so I just wrote him an email.

(((o))): Nice, that simple huh?

Evan: Yeah, he said “send me some songs” and then he said he loved the kind of strange blues-dirge thing we were doing.

(((o))): One thing I love about you guys is the music does kind of the same thing as Twin Peaks, it creates an environment that you kind of live within during the duration of the music. When I found out Dean Hurley produced it I thought that made perfect sense for what you do.

Evan: Yeah, me too.

(((o))): You recorded it at Earth Analog (Matt Talbot of Hum’s studio) right?

Evan: Yeah in Tolono, Il which is also kind of a Twin Peaks oddball kind of place. It’s an old industrial wasteland that’s a crossroads for trains. Where we were there were trains going by every ten minutes at such a high speed that they would shake the building.

(((o))): Did you have to stop working when the trains went by?

Evan: There’d be times where we’d work around it and there’d be times that we’d just play. There’s train horns all over the recording, mostly in a way that wouldn’t even know and you’d probably just think it’s a synthesizer.

(((o))): In the press release for the album it mentions that it’s designed to be completely non linear, where you can start it at any point. I think that’s an interesting departure from both people who think that the single is everything and the kind of people who write big concepts that are meant to be listened to in a very specific way.

Evan: It’s difficult to listen to a full album. The attention span of a modern human being is so small, I feel like we have the attention span of an ant. It’s just how it is when we have accessibility to everything and everything. With that each side of a record needs to live on it’s own because the is the attention span of human beings. I love records and I collect a ton of record and so many records that I have it’s difficult to get up and flip the side, you know? Being a collector and investing myself in artists from all times, anything that was created on vinyl really, there’s a thing about listening to one side of a record and having it feel complete. Rather than the ending of the first side leaving you hanging, I just wanted to feel like it doesn’t leave you hanging.

(((o))): Not a lot of people take people’s attention span into consideration, haha.

Evan: It’s just a fact.

(((o))): You’re active in a lot of projects, the most active being Jaye Jayle and Young Widows, do you sit down and with intention to write for either or do you just write and decide where it lives later?

Evan: Young Widows is very inactive right now, we’re rehearsing and doing Old Wounds but we didn’t play at all for about 14 months. But it kind of refers back to your first question with writing music and spontaneity of creativity. Jaye Jayle and the songs we write are just what I’m writing right now. Young Widows songs a lot of time were just from showing up and playing and seeing what happens. Composition always kind of came later after we’d been playing for a while. With Jaye Jayle pieces they’re just something I work on every single day for hours and hours, whether it’s playing one chord for three weeks trying to find the melody or dynamic or rhythm within that note or chord or whatever it might be. I absolutely love Jaye Jayle, it brings me more joy than anything I’ve ever done in my entire life. It’s the most euphoric and hypnotic and therapeutic music that I’ve ever created and I feel lucky to have the band because they’re all on the same page.

(((o))): With Jaye Jayle there’s a kind of tension where it feels like it’s about to explode but it never does whereas Young Widows feels like everything is exploding all the time.

Evan: Absolutely

(((o))): Is that conscious decision? Kind of intentionally moving away from that more explosive outlet and stripping it back?

Evan: It’s definitely unconscious and unintentional. It’s more exciting for me to be contained and in control. I was extremely nervous tonight in a way of being in control. It’s so much easier to go full on, just playing loud and having it turn into this chaotic thing. Staying in the environment we have created is exciting because it’s difficult. The instincts of being a musician is at times playing more and everyone having their times of stepping out of the composition. Honestly I feel what’s going on with this music is the tip of the iceberg of what’s going to happen and there’s going to be even more tension and control going forward.

(((o))): You played a lot of new material tonight and one thing that really struck me is the restraint your auxiliary player (Corey Smith) shows, he’ll just rest and wait. Finding musicians like that is pretty rare. That adds to overall feeling that at any moment one of these guys is just going to bust out into a solo or lead line but they never do, is that kind of a theme?

Evan: I don’t know if it’s a theme so much as it is an idea of composition rather than individuals. At times even the singing and the lyrical subject matter and the control of even singing, I don’t even want that to shine. I always think about film and film scores. I just rewatched Badlands and that film influenced me highly. Watching that again and every time the music comes in it doesn’t take you out of the film it kind of puts you more in it. It gives you a narrative and a voice and almost earthly place. I know everyone in the band understands that feeling, we’ve all been playing music for a long time and we’ve never been it in trying to live a world of dominant showing off. We just all want to create an environment.

(((o))): It works really well, even tonight where you played mostly new songs that I had never heard it didn’t really matter because the environment is consistent and holds your attention. Which brings me to the last question. Is it hard to switch from this controlled environment back to the Young Widows sound for you upcoming tour?

[sarohara]

Stranger: m

You: You first

You: to say hey

Stranger: hey lol

You: ahhaha jk

You: Hey, how u doing?

You: im f btw

Stranger: cool im good just bored you?

You: Well, everyone's bored on omegle so..what's new right?

You: Im good as well

Stranger: haha true

You: May i ask ur name?

Stranger: Adam you?

You: Hey Adam, how's life?

You: ahahaha

You: Im Sarah

Stranger: nice to meet you :) its okay not great not awful

You: Oh it's a balance then

You: nice meeting u :)

Stranger: hahaha covid sucks but again what else is new right?

You: ahahahhaha yeeea right

You: Life sucks rn

You: But i hope it gets a lil bit better.

You: one day.

Stranger: same :( It has to haha

You: Hopefully :)

You: Wyd now?

Stranger: just school wbu?

Stranger: well not rn

Stranger: its 5 50 am here

Stranger: and thanksgiving lol

You: Oh online classes right? I hate it

You: Oooh 5:50am?

You: Wow, too early

Stranger: yeah im in california. couldn't sleep

You: yeaaa happy thanksgiving :) r u gonna do today?

You: Oh california, gotcha

Stranger: nm maybe play football and just eat hahaha you?

You: Eat is the best one right

You: Im not gonna do anything at all

Stranger: nice sometimes its good to just chill

Stranger: where you from?

You: Yea, i'm always doing this ahaha

You: i'm brazilian

Stranger: oh very cool :)

You: Yea :))

You: Hey, lemme show u a song

Stranger: ok

You: hold up

Stranger: ok haha

You: should i send the link or name?

Stranger: either one!

You: oke

You: name then

You: idk you yet by alexander 23

Stranger: listening now

You: it's a really good song and I just wanted to show this incredible masterpiece to the all world ahaha but it's not possible, sadly

You: i don't even know if u'll like it, but i hope so

Stranger: I love it actually

Stranger: my kinda music for sure

You: oh my gawd, i'm so happy.

You: ahahhaha

Stranger: thank you that made my day better

You: no, thank YOU

You: :))

Stranger: hahaha music is the best honestly

You: u mean, music is the best thing in the whole world? yea ikr. it's just perfect.

You: or u mean, that one..?

Stranger: I mean music in general

Stranger: but that song is excellent

You: oooh yeaa!!!

Stranger: already added to my spotify

You: it's my favorite thing in the whole world. music.

You: Aw :))

You: well, your turn.

Stranger: hahaha okay hold on

You: take your time

Stranger: as much as I ever could - city and color

You: oh, it's an old one

You: I mean, that's cool

You: listening now

Stranger: its one of my faves

You: oh shoot. this intro is just awesome.

Stranger: right?

You: ooohh that's so beautiful. idk, just hitts different u know. I genuinely love it.

Stranger: good im glad I could send a good one back :)

You: Aw, yea, it's freaking good :)

You: hey, wyd on omegle? u shouldn't be here ahaha nah im kidding

Stranger: hahaha I just go with the flow you know? california hippy :)

You: yea?😂

You: ahahhaha i get that. california hippy.

Stranger: thats me for sure

Stranger: what are you doing here hahaha

You: Guess what

You: I'm bored 😂

Stranger: lollll shocker hahahaha

You: And i just wanted to talk to someone. idk.

You: ahahahhahaha

You: no kidding!

You: lmao

Stranger: anything in particular you want to talk about ? :)

You: well, i mean , i guess anything in particular. Just talk about randomly things. u know.

You: killing time.

Stranger: yeah no I feel you for sure :)

You: Oh good to know that i'm not alone, im not the only one 😂

Stranger: it gets lonely with all online shit

You: Yea for real...everything's so complicated now.

Stranger: I know :(

You: I wish I had someone to blame sometimes ahah

Stranger: I know what you mean but at least its fucked up for everyone

You: Yea but if i could i would take all this shit just for me u know

Stranger: for sureeee I know what you mean but you can't bear that big of a burden alone

You: Yea ik ur right. but at least that would be 1000x easier.

You: I guess so. but anyways, there's nothing that i can do or anyone else.

Stranger: yeah :( no just be in it together and try to spread good vibes

You: yeah that's the point :))

Stranger: :)

You: hey, what about The Girl?

You: I mean, by city and colour

Stranger: love that one too

Stranger: they have some incredible songs

Stranger: the lead singers name is Dallas green thats where the band name comes from but he's a genius

You: Oooh wow, wise man huh ahah

You: It was really genius.

You: Nice pun I would say lmao

Stranger: I know his music just hits different

You: Yea. it feels like ur in 1999 traveling the world with someone.

Stranger: yeah its so calming :)

You: Pretty smooth aha :)

Stranger: makes me feel like the worlds gonna be okay ahaha

You: do u know more than one? please tell me, i need to escape there.

You: ahahha just kidding

Stranger: hahahaha

You: but yea, that's the power of music, it's like the whole world doesn't exist. just u & melody. and everything's gonna be okay. whatever it takes.

Stranger: its honestly pretty intimate sharing your favorite stuff with someone

You: Yaaaaas! it's really special, i would say. people usally don't wanna talk about stuff like that.

Stranger: honestly it gets deep for sure

You: Is that bad? should i stop to say these things or something?

Stranger: no no not at all :)

You: sorry, i'm a typist one. as u can see.

You: ahahha ooooh okay

Stranger: what do you look like?

You: u mean, physically?

Stranger: yeah

You: i'm brunette. brown eyes. 5''3. like that? ahahaha

Stranger: yeah you sound beautiful :)

You: oh thank u ahaha i guess.

You: what about u?

Stranger: 6 2 brown hair blue green eyes

You: Oh you're tall huh. and u sound cute. btw

Stranger: thanks :)

You: no problem :))

You: what time is it now?

Stranger: 6 42

You: almost an hour since the last time right

Stranger: yeah hahaha

You: time flies lmao

Stranger: it does for sure should I let you go?

You: good question.

You: nah, im kidding.

You: u shoudn't.

You: ahaha

You: just if u want to.

Stranger: not that I want to haha I just might go sleep soon

You: oh!!! sure sure. it's up to u.

Stranger: sorry haha I just have to get ready for bed and stuff and got kinda h

You: Oh

You: I get that

You: typing something?

Stranger: oh I was waiting it seemed like you were haha

Stranger: are you at all?

You: if i was typing? nah i wasn't. actually, i was waiting ahahah

Stranger: waiting for?

Stranger: oh for my typing?

You: oh my gawd ahahah yea exactly

You: but nvm

Stranger: no tell me hahaha

You: tell what? i was just waiting for ur typing. that's so confusing aahaha

Stranger: never mind hahaha were not on the same page hahahaha

You: def we're not ahahah

You: anyways. that's it, i guess so.

You: u have to go, right.

Stranger: alright it was nice talking to you :) yeah im sorry hahaha I got h

You: aight, nice meeting u as well

[gnewscar]

More Luxurious BMW X6 Combined Coupe with SUV

Realese BMW X6, gnewscar - What happens if the coupé is combined with an SUV? The answer is in the All New BMW X6. MW officially launched the All New BMW X6 virtually through the Zoom application on Friday 15 May 2020. The presence of the All New BMW X6 is a complement to the BMW X Series, the BMW X1. The latest BMW X2, BMW X4, BMW X4, BMW X5 and BMW X7. "About a decade ago, BMW took an innovative step to combine the characteristic attributes of a Sports Activity Vehicle with the DNA of a classic coupé, giving birth to the Sports Activity Coupé (SAC) vehicle segment," said Ramesh Divyanathan. He added, the BMW X6 was the first member in the new segment and to this day and more than 443,000 units of the BMW X6 have been sold worldwide in two generations of models. Now, the All New BMW X6 as SAC, nicknamed The Beast, is marketed in one variant, the BMW X6 xDrive40i. So what is special about this Beast compared to other X Series BMWs ?. Iconic grille BMW X6 Born as an SAC, although based on the same as the BMW X5, the All New BMW X6 offers a charming exterior. All existing body curves are characteristic of this car. Of course, the sloping roof from pillar B to the back is the most prominent as a coupé.

Present for the first time at the All New BMW X6 is sophisticated innovations such as the Iconic Glow lights on the BMW kidney grille. Besides being able to open the lid automatically according to the air requirements needed by the engine, when the lights are turned on, the grille will turn white. Make it the hallmark of the All New BMW X6. Meanwhile, the BMW M Sport package embedded in the interior gives a distinct and striking look. Charming exterior BMW X6 In the headlight section, SAC uses BMW Laserlight technology as a standard, combined with Selective Beam which optimizes the function of the remote lights so as not to dazzle other drivers, even though the range is quite far, which is around 530 meters.

The side of the All New BMW X6 comes with typical BMW proportions, with a sharp silhouette character and dynamic flowing roofline. The new BMW X6 xDrive40i M Sport is equipped with 21-inch wheels M light-alloy Y-spoke style 741 M Bicolour as standard. This vehicle is also equipped with BMW M Sport brakes with four piston calipers in front and one piston calipers in the rear. While the calipers are painted blue and embossed with the BMW M logo, giving it a sporty look. The back features a dashing silhouette with masculine shoulders, further strengthened by the wide L-shaped LED taillights. For the tailgate, it integrates seamlessly and is almost invisible on horizontal lines on the vehicle. Exclusive interior BMW X6 As a car that is able to bulldoze terrain on road and off road, the interior of the All New BMW X6 is crammed with various features so that it always makes both the driver and passengers always feel comfortable when in it. Quality materials with Vernasca leather as a standard bandages ranging from upholstery, dashboard, to door trim. Do not forget, because part of the M variant, there are some typical accessories such as the steering wheel to the seat belt.

All driving needs such as entertainment, driving information, to navigation can be arranged and monitored via the 12.3-inch touch screen Control Display or iDrive with the BMW Operating System 7.0. This screen can also read gestures, such as a rotating finger to increase or decrease the volume or move the thumb to the right and left to select a song. The mood in the cabin can also be adjusted based on the ambient light available in green, orange, red, blue, white, bronze, and so on. See Also : 2021 Ford Everest Large Body and Luxury Medium Next-Generation SUV Remain relieved Other features in the interior are 2.5 zone automatic air conditioner control, cup holders with coolers and heaters, Apple CarPlay wireless, Parking Assitant including Reversing Assistant, panoramic glass roof that is 83% larger than its predecessor, and Harman / Kardon Surround System 16 speakers, 464 Watt.

Meanwhile, even though the roof is sloping, sitting in the back seat does not feel cramped. Still quite comfortable when occupied by two people with a height of 175 cm and 165 cm. The head does not stuck ceiling, knee does not touch the front seat. There is an arm rest in the rear seat which is equipped with a cup holder. This seat is also equipped with ISOFIX to associate a toddler chair. After that, the interior offers a high level of variability, thanks to a separate 40:20:40 rear seat back that can be folded to increase luggage space capacity from 580 liters to 1,530 liters. BMW X6 Powerful and fast Despite increasing length and width, the impression of power and speed on the All New BMW X6 remains impressive. BMW claims, this car can accelerate from 0 to 100 kilometers per hour in just 5.5 seconds. Fast enough right? The All New BMW X6 engine does offer acceleration capabilities with the typical response of a BMW inline six-cylinder gasoline engine. This car carries a 3.0 liter BMW TwinPower Turbo engine combined with twin-scroll turbocharger, Valvetronic, and double VANOS. The engine delivers power through the 8-speed Steptronic Sport Transmission Sport complete with paddle shift. The result is a maximum torque of 450 Nm with an average fuel consumption of 11.1 kilometers per liter. While the latest BMW xDrive technology with full time all wheel drive shows its advantages by ensuring the best traction for the All New BMW X6 on all road surfaces thereby increasing safety and driving comfort. See Also : Big Change Mercedes-Benz GLC Coupe 2020 Market Preserve Read the full article

[mashalocked-blog]

[Translation] Talking FM - 21 Oct 2017

Masha talks about taxes, rocket travel, guitar recommendations, real estate, and so much more. 

Credits to elegantias on Facebook for their Chinese translations!

Songs played: Sou ~new love new world~, jazz and Hepburn and you, Kazoku ni Narou yo, Nagareboshi, Sanctuary

LINK TO SUBTITLES DOWNLOAD

~

Full transcript:

It’s been a month since the House of Representatives was suddenly dissolved, tomorrow is election day. It all depends on the choice of the voters, your vote matters! Let’s vote! Good afternoon, let’s create a new world in our lives! I’m Fukuyama Masaharu! Yes, tomorrow is election day, of course I’ll be voting! Your vote can change the future of Japan! The opening song is Fukuyama Masaharu’s ‘Sou ~new love new world~’! 21 October 2017, 2pm. I'm Fukuyama Masaharu. This election is said to be the most intense one in recent times. Tomorrow is election day, I normally cast my vote on an earlier date, I think it should be the same this time too…? Actually, today’s broadcast is pre-recorded. In this election, young people can participate in voting too, it’s the first election to accept votes from 18/19 years old voters. How will it turn out? I: At that age, I didn’t have any interest in voting. Honestly speaking, me too! I was such a fool, so when I started paying high taxes, I wondered, “Ah, I have to pay so much, I clearly received so much royalties but why do I have to pay so much in taxes?” I: Did you discover it during ‘Good night’? Not yet! I: Not yet? I didn’t have to pay so much tax yet during ‘Good night’. I: So, you realised during ‘Sakurazaka’? The amount of taxes then was so high!! Although I was surprised when I received so much money, I was even more shocked when I had to pay taxes. But to live in Japan, I have to pay these taxes. So, it became the first time I thought of the question, “What are my taxes being used on?” Of course, there are many people who pay more taxes than me, but I don’t really know much about that. I learnt that taxes are used on security, culture and basic social security. I thought, “If I stay in this country, I’ll receive a pension.” But times have changed, and it makes no difference even if I’m no longer staying in Japan, although there was such a system in the past. Social security is just a number, and it doesn’t represent much. But if people get retrenched, where do they go and live after their 50s? I’ve thought of this problem before, including this problem in Japan itself. I’ve mentioned before that Fukuoka and Sendai are good choices. I: In these times, no matter where a musician goes, he can still continue working. Yes, he can still work. Also, where should the registered place of residence be moved to? A person can consider constantly changing the place by immigrating overseas, occasionally returning to Japan. What will my relationship with Japan be like then? I’ve thought a lot about problems like these. Today’s show will feature “I’m sorry, mother” letters from all over the country. This goes hand in hand with the new single, titled “I’m sorry, mother”… (t/n: a joke, please don’t go searching for this) The “I’m sorry, mother” plan, will it ever be realised? Anyway, there are many letters from mothers too, from all over Japan. Please look forward to it! Also, we will do a mass sending out of stickers from this show today. Just tell us the two keywords that we will mention in this broadcast, and you might win the stickers! We’re going to send out 99 stickers! Ah? We’ve already decided on 99 stickers? Why? I: Because today is the 99th broadcast of the show. Eh? Really? It’s the 100th episode the next week? The first keyword is ‘I’m sorry, mother’. The second keyword will be announced later, please listen carefully! 21 October, the mass giveaway of 99 stickers! It’s the season of holidays, if it takes only 35 minutes to go to New York, will you try it? I just saw this news recently. I: This is a plan from an American space development company, SpaceX. It has plans to use rockets as international transport for passengers. From Tokyo to New York, it’ll take only 35 minutes. The highest speed is 27000km/hr, but when this will be released hasn’t been announced yet. I know, but why does it only take 35 minutes? I don’t get it. After take-off, will we reach after turning around a few corners? I: Because the Earth is spinning too. Since the Earth is spinning too, that’s really convenient isn’t it? I: Just 35 minutes. But the businessmen in Tokyo and New York will be very busy. The 10 hours spent on an international flight are very important, it’s a time when no one bothers you. Recently, I travelled to Venice and San Sebastian for international film festivals. In the past, I thought taking a 11, 12 hours flight to Frankfurt was a long time… but I think it’s such a short time now! I do this and that, then I sleep. The schedule is too tight. “Ah!! I’m going to reach! My private time is over!” It feels very short. It felt long in the past, since I could sleep again and again and wake up to find that I haven’t arrived yet. Nowadays, my thoughts on this have changed. I: So even if this rocket is put into use, you’ll still… I’ll still consider it, since I can reach New York in 35 minutes. I can adapt to the time difference on the first day and start working the next day, perhaps I’ll schedule it this way. But although humans often say they’ll make full use of the time when they’re at a meeting, they’ll turn around and say, “If anything happens, we can have a few reserve days.” The schedule becomes like this! The world is annoying like this! There’s advantages and disadvantages to this. Fuji-kun from Kanagawa Prefecture, male, 39 years old: I’ll be going for the males-only concert this year! M: Thank you! Every year, I look forward to it. \NM: Thanks, please bring a hundred friends too. I’m writing this letter because there’s something I cannot understand. My daughter is entering high school this year, and she says she wants to buy a guitar. M: It’s SHISHAMO! (t/n: high school Japanese band) Fujiwara Sakura! She says she wants to buy a guitar, but I don’t know how to choose. I thought it would be best to ask Masha, do you have any guitar recommendations for girls? Honestly, a guitar maniac’s answer would be the old Yamaha FG series. It was produced in the 70s, the tone is great and it’s cheap. You can buy it at 4/5/60,000 yen. But you have to spend some time to repair most of them, such as the fret wire and the nut. So, it adds up to around 7/80,000 yen since you have to spend a bit more. But I feel that rather than buying a new guitar at 100,000 yen, it’s better to buy a guitar from the 70s, it’s even better if you get one from the 60s. If you buy the Yamaha FG series, you still have to repair it later, so you’ll spend around the same amount of money. But the tone is much better. A while ago, I went to Music Station and talked to Yuzu’s Iwasawa Koji. Iwasawa is still using the Yamaha FG series guitar, an old one. It's an amazing guitar. Kazuyan from Gunma Prefecture, male, 47 years old: I wrote this letter because I wanted to ask for your opinion. I’m the same age as you, but my daughter is currently 14 years old, in the 2nd grade in junior high. As the years go by, we talk less and less each year. She seems to be very impatient. “Hey, daughter, do you hate your dad?! What do you hate about me? You’ve got to tell me what you’re unhappy about! Isn’t that right, her mother?” She says my general cleanliness is terrible, so I drank and cried the whole night away (actually it’s a lie). M: Kazuyan, honestly, you can do without the lie… I want to become cleaner, but I don’t know how to do that. I’m just a normal office worker, there’s nothing visibly weird about me. So even if I want to become cleaner, I don’t know what I should do to make others feel that I’m clean. I think you give off a fresh/clean feeling, so what should I take note of to seem like a clean person to others? Please give me advice since we’re the same age, thank you. Kazuyan, it’s the hair on your nape and near your ears, what is it called? Anyway, these two places have to give off a clean feeling. Imanami, did you cut your hair today? I: I did. As long as you cut the hair on your nape, you’ll seem clean. Also, the feeling that the skin gives off to other people - skin shouldn’t be dry, your face shouldn’t be too oily too. What should you do then? The older you get, the more important your hairstyle becomes. I don’t like my hairstyle too. Actually, I want to get an even shorter haircut. I: Shorter than now? I want to get a really short haircut. I: Like a kariage? (t/n: kariage = sides shaved, short back hairstyle) A kariage doesn’t fit me, I don’t want it. I want to get a shorter fringe though. I’m only allowing my fringe to grow this long because of CFs and dramas, since a long fringe can form many hairstyles. Actually, I don’t normally do my hair. I honestly don’t like my fringe. Ah, besides this, there’s the nails too. Imanami, can I see your nails? Don’t pick your nails, I’ve told you before. I: Don’t you feel like picking at your nails? Definitely not! It’s because I don’t pick my nails, so I put nail protection cream. Taking care of your nails can help you maintain your hygiene, especially for middle-aged men. I want to do something about my toenails too, it often grows crookedly. I: The ends often split. Yes, yes! I: And then I’ll pick at it. I told you not to do that. I: After I pull it out, it’ll grow back. You can’t pick at it. The ends of your toenails are too white, it looks like a fossil. I: That’s right. It’s like excavating fossils. My hands can’t touch some of my toenails… I really want to do something about them… it’s better to go to a beautician. The you who lives in Tokyo, do you think Tokyo is a good place to live in? Recently, a study examined the economy and liveability statistics of 44 cities around the world and ranked them. Tokyo got 3rd place for 2 years straight. I: The 2nd place for these 2 years is New York, but the gap has lessened. Which city is the first? I: London. The property prices in these cities are very high. I: Are you considering property prices? Of course. I don’t really like these cities, whether it’s London or New York or Tokyo, because the property prices are really high, especially in London. It would be better if the property prices were a bit cheaper. I: Yes, the real estate rankings aren’t good. It's in 17th place. New York is expensive too. I: New York is in 34th place. It’s expensive to live in Tokyo too. I: 14th place. I think a better place would be Singapore. I: That’s true overall, but the liveability ranking is only at 28th place. Well, I won’t look at the property in Singapore then. My grandfather was in real estate, I suppose I inherited this interest from him. It’s hereditary. Since I was young, I’ve always been looking at property, I still like real estate even now. But the properties in Tokyo, London and New York are really very expensive. How should I look at this ranking? The next segment is 'I'm sorry, mother'. Saga Prefecture, Tsuku-chan, 41 years old, office worker, male: This segment ‘I’m sorry, mother’ is very moving, I have a story I want to share too! Now that I look back, my mother has always taken care of me with her motherly love and warmth, but I’ve only given her trouble and worries. I used to be like a countryside bully, often using “Omae!” to call my mother. (t/n: Omae is used by seniors to address juniors.) M: S-A-G-A, Saga Prefecture. During junior high, I was unapologetic even when I saw my teacher and mother running around because of me. The only woman I’ve ever hit was my mother. M: You hit your mother?! When we were arguing, I hit her face and she cried. I only regretted it then. After I hit her, I didn’t speak to her for a month. It was a painful time. But she still secretly prepared a birthday cake for me, I was so embarrassed. I only got into less trouble when I entered high school. I was such a fool back then, I made her worry so much. After 20 years, I’ve become an office worker. When I think of what happened then, I feel even more apologetic towards my mother now. But I can’t simply tell her I’m sorry, because she’ll start crying once she hears my apology. She won’t be able to stop crying! (t/n: Kyushu accent) I can’t say sorry, so I say thank you instead to make up for what I did in the past. What a fool! I think you should just write a letter. Using this letter from the broadcast, tell her “I wrote a letter to Fukuyama, he says it’s best to write you a letter." If she asks “what?”, you can tell her “no, it was Fukuyama who told me to write it.” If she says anything, just tell her “Fukuyama told me to do it.” Do write a letter to her. Kanagawa Prefecture, Hironobu, 42 years old, male, office worker: Fukuyama-san, I enjoy listening to your show every week, I’ve been listening for more than 10 years already. This is the first time I’m writing a letter to you. After hearing about the segment ‘I’m sorry, mother’, I thought of me and my mother. M: The first letter after listening for 10 years, because of this segment. When I was born, my father had already passed away. It was my mother who raised me alone. Although I didn’t do anything bad, but I did go through a rebellious phase and I had a bad relationship with my mother then. I still remember it clearly even now. When I was in the 2nd grade of junior high, my mother was 42 years old. She asked, “Hironobu, if…and I’m saying if, I have a boyfriend, what do you think of it?” I got shocked, so I immediately said, “How did you get a boyfriend! You’re an old and ugly woman!” Actually, this wasn’t what I really thought, I just carelessly said it because I was surprised. At that time, my mother… M: That’s a weird way of responding. I still remember my mother’s weird smile then, even now. M: That’s not a weird smile, it’s a forced one. Afterwards, I met with a guy who seemed to be my mother’s boyfriend at a family restaurant in my hometown. He said hello to me, then I left to meet my friend from a school club. When I went home, I told my mother, “I hate that sort of old man.” I never saw him again. My mother is living alone healthily now, but when I think of this, I wonder if I’ve ruined my mother’s happiness. I feel really apologetic towards my mother. Everyone is like this, when we’re young we tend to see the opposite sex as females. But our mothers are still our mothers, but for the first time we realise that our mothers are females too. But during this period, we don’t want to acknowledge this fact. Especially to a boy in junior high, his mother isn’t a woman, but a mother. It’s weird to see her with a boyfriend. I: This is especially true in this period… but when it’s more acceptable once the boy reaches his 20s. It’s really hard to accept. Hironobu, you and your mother… perhaps your mother doesn’t have confidence. I hope Hironobu can decide. Your mother was in her prime years when she gave birth to you at 28 years old. There probably were men who liked her, since she was in her prime then. But because she had to raise you up alone, she didn’t have time to get into a relationship. Later, perhaps at work, she meets a man. She felt his warmth, but because she hadn’t been in a romantic relationship for so long, she forgot how to be in one. So, she wanted to show you who he was before deciding. But since Hironobu couldn’t accept him, this romance ended. It’s not Hironobu’s fault, your words may have been a good thing for you and your mother. Honestly, a man may never be able to see his mother as a woman for his whole life. I: Even now, it still feels like she comes from a planet of mothers. An alien mother from the planet of mothers. When mothers decide to remarry… there are many reasons, be it for finance or psychological support. It’s normal to want to remarry. But whether the child can accept, I don't know. my father passed away when I was 17 years old. If my mother now wants to find a partner in the final years of her life, and she wants to marry him or stay with him without marrying him, I don’t think I’ll call that man my father. At this age… I: Man-to-man, I think you’ll just say, “I’ll hand my mother to you then.” Of course, there are people who still want to accept a new family member and call him “dad”. But at this age, I won’t. Everyone has their own anniversaries, and today’s date is an anniversary to me too… what is this… I’ve mentioned this before, Imanami. Can you be a bit better with dates? I: You’re releasing more and more singles, this is just an anniversary of a single’s release. What the hell is that, a single release anniversary? I: Today is the anniversary of your 4th single, ‘WOH WOW/It’s Just That I’ve Changed’. It achieved 89th place on Oricon in 1991. What are you trying to say? I: Your next single became popular. Good night? The sales only got a bit better. I: You’ve said this before, WOH WOW was the last song you couldn’t sell out. That…that…you’re phrasing it in such a delicate way, are you making fun of me?! I: No, no. Fukuyama, this is the last song you couldn’t sell out! This is the last song I couldn’t sell out! You’re too much, is there still such a way of bullying in the 21st century?! Is this the new way of bullying in 2017? I: But this song was the first one to enter the Oricon charts, how did you feel then? About that… everyone often asks me, “How did you feel then?” I was very happy, but I wasn’t overly excited. I remember that I was thinking that I could finally see a pinhole-sized light. Thank you, BROS! Saga Prefecture, Ago-chan, 57 years old, housewife, female: I went to the gym/after two days/my butt jive up. M: What does jive up mean? After my husband retired, I wanted to keep fit. I started to do walking exercises every morning, and I went to the gym too. I really wanted to work out, so I went to the gym. I felt like I had to try everything, so I tried out every single machine, including the squat weightlifting bar. M: Seya!! (t/n: Kansai-ben, meaning that's how it is) But when I stepped hard on the ground, the old companion in my butt, the secretly hidden haemorrhoids said, “Hello!” I: Hahaha… that… even now, ‘Hello!’ is still an important song… M: I know… The haemorrhoids said, “Hello!” and jumped out into the clear, it was so painful. The coach was a young man and he ran over to help me up, asking, “Is your waist alright? Is there something wrong with your waist? It’s your waist, right!” I said, “Yes, it’s my waist that’s hurting.” M: Why didn’t he ask whether it’s your haemorrhoids… Afterwards, I used my own experience to resolve it quickly. M: Ago-chan, you’re so well-experienced… no, you’re a professional! “I quickly dealt with it, then I continued working out.” Your haemorrhoids came out already though! When I went home in the car, my husband said, “Just now, you just… Bonjour, right? Don’t lift weights anymore!” My dad said ‘Hello’ to this before too. I: He had it inside? It split? It split inside-out! On the surface too. I: How painful. He often shoved it back in. “Ah, so you can just shove it back in with a push! Amazing! So it comes out like this!” Fukuoka Prefecture, Mikiko-chan, housewife, female, 54 years old: I met my ex-boyfriend in a funeral home. In February this year, I met my ex-boyfriend from high school again. The venue was my aunt’s funeral. He was in charge of greeting the family members. His hair has started to become thinner and his looks changed a lot too. But I recognised him at first sight, so we talked about the past. Because I’m a family member and he’s an employee, we couldn’t talk for too long. Even though I’m his ex-girlfriend, I feel like he did his work too poorly. My relatives were a little annoyed too, and my 25-year-old niece even said, “That baldy! I can’t wait for all your hair to drop out! Baldy!” I didn’t dare to say that I was his ex-girlfriend when the funeral ended. At this age, when I hear someone say bad things about my ex, I still feel a bit sensitive over it. M: Of course! You can criticise his work, but saying that he’s a baldy is a bit… he even wanted all his hair to drop out, he shouldn’t be like this. It’s rather rare to meet an ex-boyfriend at a funeral, but at this age, we’re all concerned about people from the past. It’s easy for them to know how I’ve been living, but I want to see them again. I wonder how they’re doing since we haven’t met for so long. (t/n: talks about Kanpai Japan concert, males-only concert, his new song for the Totto-chan drama. Skip to 35:20 for subtitles) The last keyword for the stickers contest is ‘The males-only concert is forever!’ Please put both keywords together and send it to us for the lucky draw. It’s interesting if you put them both together… (t/n: I’m sorry, mother, the males-only concert is forever!) Next week’s broadcast is the 100th episode! We’ll read lots of letters! But our casual talk is often very long.

[everythingsinred]

Let's Talk About NatsuMikan: Mikan (pt. 10)

I know it's been a while. I've been a little emotionally and physically drained these days. I've been frustrated with myself for not posting. I need this essay to keep up a sense of structure in my void of a life and I've been neglecting it, which is UNACCEPTABLE!

Anyway, we left off with the beginning of the Z Arc. Natsume has been ignoring Mikan and when she finally gathered the courage to confront him about it, he told her he hated everything about her. Today, we will discuss the aftermath of that confrontation. We will also explore Mikan's smiling complex and her story-long desire to become stronger and "useful."

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Chapter Thirty-One

Natsume starts to run first. Mikan and Ruka only follow as an afterthought, but they’re all quickly stopped in their tracks by Hotaru, riding on a goose-invention, who invites Mikan to hop on. This is personal for her: they’re gonna confront the people who stole Yuu’s alice. There’s a moment where the teachers are calling after them, where Yuu protests that they’re supposed to stay inside, and where Natsume stares in shock at this development.

Mikan focuses on him, remembering the cruel thing he just said to her. Though Hotaru’s arrival cheered her up, she’s obviously still hurt by what he said. So instead of listening to Yuu or the teachers, both Hotaru and Mikan basically tell them all to fuck off. 

He thinks he can just be mean and get away with it? No way!

This moment is Mikan’s chance to actually respond to what he said in a meaningful way. She and Hotaru can abscond from the scene, leaving him in their dust, and it’s the best chance she has to communicate how he made her feel. She still doesn’t hate him back, and it still hurts, but hey! He wanted to run after the Z intruders and she actually gets to! Beat that, jerk!

The rest of this chapter is mainly about Hotaru and Mikan. As they fly away, Mikan exclaims that she already feels so much better (presumably after having her feelings crushed by Natsume earlier), and Hotaru explains that the announcement about an “invader” is just a rumor; in fact, a Z member is being escorted onto campus. What she doesn’t know is that two other Z members have invaded campus to retrieve him. 

Mikan tells Hotaru she’s happy that Hotaru is the one most concerned about Yuu, that the girl who is always cool and collected is breaking the rules and acting boldly for a friend. Hotaru explains that Yuu is the “oasis” of Class B, one of the people who keeps her human. We saw before that she was concerned she’d become like her older brother, become twisted and cold because of the nature of the school. We also know that Hotaru was relieved, not just by Mikan’s friendship, but by Yuu’s as well. The trio keeps each other in line. I’d mentioned before that antics like the dodgeball game (and getting Class B to get along in general) work because all three of them are involved. Mikan might be the outgoing one, but Yuu has been working desperately to have Class B come together for years. He’s kind too, and reasonable, always prioritizing peace and friendship. Hotaru makes a good point that his absence would create a gaping hole in the class. Mikan might have helped get them all together, but losing a peacemaker would no doubt spur conflict in the class again.

Hotaru recalls a moment when Yuu told her that all the kids here are separated from their families. Even if they don’t say it aloud, they’re all scared and lonely. If they get along and become friends, then they won’t have to face this life entirely on their own. Mikan is naive; she still thinks of this place as a wacky school with a few unfair rules. Yuu, who has been a student here for almost his whole life, understands that there’s corruption and unfairness. He doesn’t just want to make friends, he wants to make sure that the students in his class--all of whom are suffering in the same ways--can support each other and become stronger as a result. 

They will always be a trio to me.

The fact that the trio of Yuu, Mikan, and Hotaru stops being as central after this arc makes some amount of sense since Mikan gets closer to other classmates, but it also makes me sad. They’re a trio that perfectly balance each other: Hotaru may be cold, but she knows when to dish out unpleasant truths and is logical when the other two aren’t; Mikan may be loud and annoying, but she keeps things positive and friendly; Yuu may be shy, but he keeps the peace and does his best to mediate conflicts. They get along really well, and it’s their combined efforts that brought unity to Class B. Hotaru loves Yuu and doesn’t want to lose him. Mikan also loves Yuu, and seeing that Hotaru also cares so unabashedly reminds her why she loves Hotaru too.

Hotaru is cold and calculating, an enterprising and apathetic inventor with a capitalistic mindset. Mikan doesn’t focus on those traits, though, even though they seem to be the most obvious parts of her. There’s also a hidden kindness and appreciation for the people she loves. There’s ingenuity and creativity. Mikan isn’t a masochist (I’ll say this a thousand times) because the coldness isn’t what draws her to Hotaru; it’s the parts Hotaru would rather keep under wraps. That’s why we see Mikan gushing about Hotaru the most when Hotaru does something clever, shows off her accomplishments, and (most of all) when she does something kind.

Mikan, being an optimist, is someone who focuses on the bright sides of people after she’s been shown them. After she met the “real” Ruka, the act he tried putting on didn’t faze her at all; she already knew who he really was inside. Once she realized what kind of person Sumire could be, she was able to tolerate Sumire’s bad qualities better. Once she saw that Natsume was capable of kindness, she couldn’t hate him anymore. The goodness of people is what stands out to her, which is why when she sees that there’s good traits in somebody, it’s hard for her to stop seeing them.

Which is why even now, she still likes Natsume. He hurt her, and he has very obvious bad traits, but because she’s seen the good ones, that’s what stands out to her. That’s why she’ll still like him going forward even if he never actually apologizes for what he’s said.

And she’s happy to see Hotaru be so open with her, to finally say out loud all the things Mikan already knew. Mikan is touched, especially to be included among the people Hotaru likes, and gets even more excited about saving Yuu’s alice.

One chapter, Natsume closes himself off, crushing her. The next, Hotaru opens up, and Mikan is incredibly happy as a result. 

But things go sideways very quickly: Hotaru is hearing commotion on her spying headphones, so she calls off their plan. They’re going to head back.They start to leave, but they’re encountered by the Z members, including the one who’d previously been captured by the academy. Hotaru freezes, but Mikan points out that she can see some teachers who might be able to help, bringing attention back to them.

Family reunion!

(Hotaru called her “Mikan,” which is why Yuka pays attention, because of course she knows that name, and which is why she approaches her. Yuka, who did everything in her power to make sure her daughter had a safe life away from the academy, has just discovered that Mikan somehow ended up at Alice Academy anyway. It’s only natural she would step closer.)

The woman reaches for Mikan, a Z member spots a security guard behind the kids, and Hotaru takes a bullet for Mikan.

I don't know how long the list is, but add another trauma!

It happens so quickly that it takes Mikan a moment to understand what has even happened, but it’s safe to say that when she processes that Hotaru has been shot, she is no longer over-the-moon happy.

Chapter Thirty-Two

When we see Mikan again, she looks unlike anything we’ve ever seen from her: she’s in a state of shock, frozen from witnessing her best friend take a bullet for her. Mikan is usually good at smiling and staying upbeat, but as I had pointed out at the beginning of this essay, she quickly starts experiencing traumatic events in rapid succession. She may be the most childish and cheerful girl around, but even she has her limits. 

Poor Mikan :(

So she doesn’t chat with the others when they come by, she doesn’t light up. She just calls out for Hotaru when she comes out of surgery. But even when the kids are allowed a few minutes with Hotaru before she’s put in an isolated room, Mikan doesn’t say much. She just stares, gloomy and dark, very much unlike her. She is blaming herself, aware that the bullet had been meant for her, aware that Hotaru sacrificed herself for her one more time. Hotaru, asleep, calls out for her parents, shocking Mikan even more. 

I like picking panels that include Natsume if I can help it.

Subaru coldly tells them to leave, that their presence isn’t helping, and that the virus she got from the bullet might kill her if they don’t find an antidote.

The hospital is full of Hotaru’s fans, and everyone around Mikan is crying. Even though she is obviously shocked, she doesn’t shed any tears or say much of anything. When Tono and Noda come by, she lets Tono pick her up and lets herself be comforted, but she still doesn’t cry or reply to anything that's said. She turns for a moment only when Noda tells Natsume that he’s been summoned for a DA meeting. She watches him leave and they share a look.

I analyzed this look from Natsume’s POV, that giving her a meaningful glance is really all he can offer in her time of need, but it’s also interesting from Mikan’s POV. He told her he hates her, and he obviously doesn’t care about Hotaru, so why is he even here? Why is he giving her a look? 

Mikan will continue to be confused by Natsume’s endless back-and-forth behavior for a long time, and this is only one example. If you’ve ever wondered how somebody could not see that Natsume was head-over-heels for her, all it takes is seeing that, from Mikan’s POV, this guy is anything but consistent. One minute he’s hanging out with her at the festival, the next he’s making fun of her, then he’s all soft and saying her name, then he’s ignoring her for weeks, then he’s telling her he straight up hates her, then he’s giving her meaningful looks. It doesn’t make any sense! Natsume has always been a conundrum to her, a puzzle with almost all the pieces missing, and it’s still the case now.

The scene moves on quickly though, because Hotaru has woken up, and she has something to say to Mikan: telling her she’s ugly, to wipe that look off her face, to not worry about her. To smile.

I can see a complex forming fast...

We join Mikan again outside, with Ruka and Yuu catching up with her, and we finally see her say what she’s been thinking out loud. Hotaru doesn’t talk about the things that bother her. Mikan is loud about wanting to see Jii-chan again. She complains about things and makes sure everyone knows what she’s feeling. But Hotaru keeps that to herself. She wasn’t only trying to get the best student award to see Mikan after all; she loves her family too and now that she’s on her death bed, all she wants is to see her parents. Hotaru is cool and confident, usually blank-faced, but she’s still a little girl, and little girls cry out for Mommy and Daddy when they’re hurt. Mikan has never seen that side of her before, and is shocked. 

That’s how bad things are, Mikan explains, that Hotaru (who never complains or lets on that she’s in pain) is crying out for her parents. And EVEN WITH THAT, she’s more concerned about Mikan than herself.

Mikan finally breaks down, crying for the first time since Hotaru has been shot, and she feels guilty for it. Hotaru tells her to smile (out of good intentions), to not worry, because she finds strength in Mikan’s positivity. If even Mikan can’t smile, then the situation seems all the more dire. And she wants Mikan to be able to smile, to not be sad. She is worrying for Mikan, but Mikan can only think that she’s messing up somehow by crying, that she’s weak for shedding tears. She wants to be strong, like Hotaru is.

I’ve mentioned this before, in the introductory arc, where Mikan started developing complexes about being useless, about being weak. When she first ran away to the academy, she was trying to be selfless, to sacrifice something, but she ended up (in her own view) putting her friends in danger and inconveniencing everyone. She doesn’t ever recognize her own strength, her own sacrifices that she’s already made. She views strength as eternal smiles and no shed tears, but that’s not what strength is. She berates herself for crying when Hotaru is going through worse, but pain isn’t a competition. Hotaru might be in pain, but so is Mikan. She should cry if she wants to. 

Not only is this not right, but also Hotaru being blank-faced isn't what makes her strong. I think Hotaru could probably afford to be a little more upfront about her feelings, sure, but she seems to know when to be serious and when to tease. She thinks of other people, the ones she cares about. She is confident and sure of herself and her abilities. Her lack of tears isn't what makes her strong, in other words. Mikan has her own strength to, but struggles to see it. Additionally, she seems to think she can be as strong and secure and mature as she wants without going through the necessary life experience needed to reach that level. We'll get into that later.

This is further evidence of that complex she will only continue to develop. Just like Natsume has a martyr complex, a trait that seems noble on the surface but is in reality dangerous and unhealthy, Mikan also has a trait like that. Mikan sees herself as useless. The only thing that seems to have value is her smile. People find strength from it, so if that’s all she can bring to the table, then why would she ever let it leave her face?

She’s told (I think by Tono) that she’ll be strong like Hotaru some day--which is kind, but also missing the point a little. Ruka comforts her, hugging her. They are like souls, too. Mikan wants to take on all of Hotaru’s pain as her own. Ruka wants to do the same for Natsume. Mikan doesn’t want to be a burden on Hotaru. Ruka doesn’t want to be a burden on Natsume. Mikan wants to smile for Hotaru, to not cry anymore. Ruka promised Natsume that he wouldn’t smile if Natsume couldn’t smile. So he understands better than anyone what she’s struggling with right now.

And maybe that makes them a little bit of a bad influence on each other (again, they are kids; so I’m not calling anything problematic or toxic because all kids are messes learning how to live). They see their friends suffer and they want to be stronger for them, which is good, but both Ruka and Mikan are selfless to a fault too. They don’t value their own pain as something worth crying over. They make promises they shouldn’t keep (to always smile, to never smile) which will only cause unnecessary guilt in the future. 

I love this moment of connection between them.

But they’re also good influences on each other too. They’re able to support each other because they get it. So there’s really nobody better to comfort Mikan now, because every word out of her mouth is something Ruka has thought about Natsume, because he’s been in her position before many times. 

Chapter Thirty-Three

Mikan isn’t taken to her dorm like she’s supposed to be; instead they all go to the SA classroom. Tono puts it best: she shouldn’t be alone right now when she needs support. Misaki is most supportive, making her a hot drink and sympathizing with her plight. Mikan is still in tears, still crying over her friend. Tono muses about a tunnel in the senior division that might lead to a wormhole (in other words, a possible key to saving Hotaru and getting Yuu’s alice back). Mikan clings to this hope, suddenly cheered up with the idea that there’s something she can do to help Hotaru.

Tono tries to backtrack, but when Mikan starts crying over the fact that he would like in her time of need, he finds he can’t. Her classmates come in too, and the issue of this tunnel is suddenly the subject of debate. They argue back and forth on how reckless the idea is, but Mikan holds firm: she and Hotaru promised that they’d save Yuu’s alice, and Hotaru is in trouble now, so she wants to do something to help. Mikan, who always feels useless, wants to prove herself. She wants to be strong like Hotaru. So far, Hotaru has been the one breaking the rules to help Yuu (controlling Narumi, ditching the teachers, etc.), something Mikan admired. Now it’s her turn to break the rules and save the day. 

Ruka can connect to Mikan's speech because he's been there, but there's a sentiment that also connects Mikan to Natsume in his eyes as well. With that in mind, he has to support her.

And Ruka is touched by her speech, because he’s always felt that way about Natsume, so it makes sense that he’d be the first person to volunteer to help her. Mikan is moved, because support means her plan might make sense to somebody other than her. But then Natsume volunteers too, and that’s entirely out of left field.

Natsume, who is always cynical and jaded, who seems to think that everything is stupid or a bad idea, is on her side. Remember that the last thing he told her was that he hates everything about her, that he wants her to stay away. Here he is now, volunteering to spend more time with her, saying that he prefers her plan to sitting around and doing nothing. WISHY WASHY MESS.

Mikan's like "????????"

Mikan is understandably surprised, and they share one more look. Sure, he’s not smiling. Sure, there’s no apology or sweet words. But he’s picking her side and that means something. Even Mikan can tell this means he must not hate everything about her.

So Tono gives in and the plan takes off. The kids are gonna sneak into the high school division to find the tunnel by eating Gulliver candies.

Chapter Thirty-Four

They create substitutes and alibis for their absences going forward and then it’s done. The plan is already in motion, even if Tsubasa is against it. 

Mikan is the first to join Tono and Tsubasa after eating the candy, suddenly fifteen! But just because she’s fifteen on the outside doesn’t mean she’s any more mature on the inside. She still doesn’t understand Tono’s perverted comments.

She’s awestruck to see how Natsume and Ruka have changed, though. It’s so bizarre to see them grown up that she feels like she’s going crazy. We can assume that she thinks they’re cute, because she’s blushing and freaking out, which is fun to see because Mikan didn’t seem to really understand why someone would have a crush on Natsume after finding out he’s a jerk. She knows he’s a jerk, and yet!

Mikan and her weakness for beautiful people...

Then she trips and he catches her, and the moment is sweet for a bit. First, he tags along to the hospital to see her. Then he joins her team. Now he’s catching her! It seems like he really wasn’t telling the whole truth when he said he hated her. The pieces don’t fit properly, but she’s happy that he doesn’t seem to really hate her. So she blushes again! Because she really hadn’t been expecting kindness from him after Chapter Thirty. Plus he’s not bad-looking as a teenager--

And then he feels her up. Nevermind!

They bicker and fight (and Tsubasa points out that all three of the kids are completely unchanged on the inside even if they look grown up) and it’s the first time they’ve really done so since the culture fest. I said in Natsume’s essays that he must be relieved by that because it’s all he can reasonably expect from her at this point, but I think she must be relieved in some way too. She’s bickered and argued with Natsume plenty in the story so far. She started liking him, but they were still bickering. Then all of a sudden he was ignoring her. They weren’t even fighting--they weren’t talking at all. Being able to argue with him and having him bicker back must be a relief. It’s a sign, along with all the stuff I mentioned above, that Natsume might be back to normal.

It's so funny that Mikan only pauses fighting with Natsume to climb up the pothole and then she goes right back to it. She must have really missed this!

They sneak onto the high school division campus and instantly face obstacles like angry, sentient statues with violence issues and annoying hall monitors. They’ve been doing a good job blending in, but then Mikan swallows her candy. 

She calls out to Ruka for help. He’s the nicest guy among them really, and the least likely to yell at her or call her an idiot for messing up. She’s right (and wrong) to ask him for help. He’s only concerned and immediately tries to help, telling her to hide out of sight while he asks for assistance. But Ruka doesn’t know the high school division any better than she does, so he messes up too, getting them trapped in a zero-gravity chamber. Mikan cries out for help from her senpais, and they do, Tono amplifying Tsubasa’s alice so he can yank them out of the chamber. 

But both Mikan and Ruka appear in front of the high-schoolers as children once more. They get caught by a hall monitor with the ice alice and now all the kids are stuck and even Natsume has swallowed his candy (they are all so cute with their baggy clothes ;-;). Mikan calls for her senpai for help, but it’s surprisingly Natsume who saves them, using his alice to melt the ice.

You’d think that, being stuck in ice, she’d first think of Natsume, the fire Alice, for help. But she’s still angry at him, and he’s so rarely kind, especially lately, that asking him for help doesn’t even occur to her. He’s so far not given her much of a reason to.

But he does save them, and Mikan looks at him differently. He was saving himself too, but he also saved her. Not to repeat myself for the nth time, but he keeps acting contrary to what he’d said before, and she keeps being surprised. 

Always pay attention to sparkly panels!

It would be one thing if he suddenly changed and was nice after claiming he hates her. That’s not what happened. He’s not nice. Everytime he does something kind, he balances it out with something mean. She doesn’t know what to think of him, but so far on this trip he’s been more helpful than antagonistic, and she has been keeping track.

Chapter Thirty-Five

There is so much PLOT and INFO and LORE here in this arc that I’ll either skim or skip, depending on how relevant it is for character and relationship growth. Just keep that in mind.

The group manages to find the only people who might know about the tunnel: Sakurano and Subaru, who are never seen apart, like life partners or boyfriends or something. Mikan pleads with them to help, taking responsibility for all the broken rules. Natsume might be a good talker, somebody who knows exactly what to share and when to hold back (an excellent negotiator), but Mikan is all heart. She’s not smart, but she feels immensely, so she interrupts with an emotional request that they help out of the kindness of their hearts, because Yuu and Hotaru need it. 

When Sakurano rejects her, she gets angry, asking Subaru how he could watch his sister struggle and not do anything about it. Usually, these emotional requests aren’t as successful in bargains as Natsume’s approach of playing with power imbalance. But Mikan isn’t trying to manipulate anybody; she’s sincere and earnest, and that’s why her approach works. She wants Subaru to care about Hotaru, so she says it out loud. She wants Sakurano to help because it’s the right thing to do, so she says so.

"I want to believe you care, that you're worried about her too." Don't mind me. I struggle with not talking MORE about the Imai siblings. I'm holding back, I promise.

Sakurano concedes that he’ll help them, even though it could get him and Subaru in trouble, but only if this isn’t just a bare-bones move of desperation. Natsume boasts about his credentials, that the plan will go smoothly because he’s part of it--and also Ruka. He turns to Mikan, because this is her idea, and he asks about her. 

This is maybe the first time that someone has looked to Mikan and asked what she would contribute. People chat with her, sure, and how she feels has weight and all that. That’s not what I’m talking about. People underestimate Mikan (and have been this whole arc, actually), with Tono and Tsubasa dismissing her idea to save Hotaru, Sumire shutting her plan down, and her own self-doubts putting into question whether she can actually help anyone. It was only when Ruka and Natsume signed on to her plan that she was taken seriously. Sakurano and Subaru had up to this point dismissed all of them as naive little children. But Natsume is looking to her now, because this was her plan from the start, and whatever ideas she has should be heard. This is her mission. She should have a say. What role does she want to play here?

Something something viewing her as an equal with something to contribute or whatever.

I talked about how Natsume stressing that Ruka would be just as instrumental and beneficial to the cause as him was a way of calling Ruka his equal. But he’s doing that now with Mikan too. This is important! Natsume, who has just shown off how instrumental he'll be to this mission, expects she'll be helpful too. It means a lot, especially coming from him. Mikan hasn’t really ever had people expecting things from her before, so she’s taken aback, but she eventually concludes that what she can do best is use her alice to protect her friends. She’s expected to participate equally, so she puts herself on the line. She still doesn’t value her alice as much as she should, but she knows that smiles won’t help here, and nullification is the only other thing she feels she can offer.

So that’s that. They go to the tunnel and somehow all her teammates go in before her. That’s how committed they all are to her cause. Natsume goes in without question, and Ruka follows after, determined. Tono gives Mikan his alice stone right before she can disappear. 

In the final seconds before she goes through the tunnel, she can see Subaru looking at her, like he wants to say something. He doesn’t know much about his sister. So far, he’s spent more time healing her unconscious body in the hospital than he’s spent actually talking to her. He wants to see her get better too. Mikan wanted him to be more than what Hotaru had assumed, that he wasn’t just a cold robot devoid of all humanity, that he cared for his sister somehow. He does want her to save Hotaru, to find the antidote. (Subaru is a lot like Natsume in that way; acting like he cares could put Hotaru in danger. And he’s also like Hotaru, since he acts aloof around her even once they start getting closer.) This is not relevant except that I love Subaru and Hotaru’s sibling bond so I wanted to ramble. Moving on.

Conclusion

Or... I'll be moving on in the next part, which I will probably post tomorrow! These chapters are very exciting, but heavier in lore than in relationship analysis.

In this part, we discussed Mikan's new mission: not just to save Hotaru and Iinchou, but to become stronger. Additionally, Natsume had been backtracking from his insistence that he hates everything about her. He has so far, right after saying he hates her, been on her side all day.

In the next part, we'll see the Z Arc continue and be able to compare how Mikan imagines this mission to go and how it really goes down. She'll see a little bit more of how different Natsume is from the rest of them, and her feelings will only get stronger!

ALSO, happiest of birthdays to @crimsoncitrus , a very good friend and an awesome person to know!

Anyway, I'm gonna go earn $100 now. :)

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