#nie: ask games

[wszczebrzyszynie]

8 i 10?

8. What's an old project idea that you've lost interest in

a project idea ive abandoned nearly completly would be miłość mleko i węgiel (love milk and coal) which was just brutalism yuri vaguely based around stories from my grandparents youth. Some of it got cannibalized into space mining i believe and some of it i still want to reuse later on with a new oc story idea i havent yet talked about

10. Favorite piece of clothing to draw

Anything loose and baggy

[tavina-writes]

For Mid-Autumn, how about Nie Huaisang celebrating head canons. Does he make mooncakes? Or buy them? How does he spend time with? Where does he go to view the moon? Anything like that, idk, those were just the first questions that sprang to my mind.

:DDD Happy Mid Autumn! ------- When he had been a boy, their family had filled an entire courtyard and they'd discussed the moon together on a night much like this one. Tonight, it is not quite the same, but despite the situation at Guanyin Temple earlier that autumn, Nie Huaisang can't quite find it in himself to be sad. 

He'd done what he set out to do, and he had escaped largely unscathed from the proceedings. He can stand to be at least a little self satisfied, surely. The outer courtyard in the Unclean Realm is boisterous with the sound of junior disciples debating the merits of one type of mooncake versus another. 

He does not really care about this line of conversation because it reminds him too much of when Xichen-ge (Lan Xichen) and Da-ge would debate the merits of mixed nut mooncakes while holding up the proceedings (and perhaps drunkenly compose a poem or too) but the chattering junior disciples distract him from the matters that he will eventually have to attend to, so he marks it down as good enough. 

(The accounts, and what a mess they are currently in now that he has to peel apart his and the sect's expenditures depending on what exactly all his incorrectly labeled items had been, and what San-ge had done to them, and what he had done to them in response to make them worse, are tomorrow's problem. He will leave them aside for tonight, as he had done for a month's worth of nights, because the day where he'd actually finish solving this problem has still not yet arrived.) 

For the moment at least, the sound of laughter washes over him as he leans against the railing, looking, not up at the full moon as pale as a bowl of steamed eggs, but at the juniors in the courtyard, faces red in the light of the lanterns and the autumn chill. 

He will have to consider this enough. 

[least-carpet]

If you want, 10, 11, 12, 13! (mdzs)

Hello!

I answered 10 here, but here are the other ones!

11. What is your most sinful headcanon?

It occurs to me that I don't really know what this means. Like, sexiest? Most violent? Are thoughts sinful?

Once again, I bow to Ms. MXTX. I can't compete. But I guess, off the top of my head, I would say that Wei Wuxian and Jiang Cheng's relationship was Weird. I can accept many expressions of that Weirdness, but as teenagers they should be Weird and Intense about each other in a way that's invisible and quite natural to them and a little strange to other people, not straightforwardly romantic but also not immediately familial. This can run the gamut from "Wei Wuxian climbs into Jiang Cheng's bed whenever he's lonely and wants a cuddle" to "they have wrestling matches where they take turns holding each other down" to skinny-dipping together to "I'll show you mine if you show me yours." If they were teens now, Wei Wuxian would take chewed gum out of Jiang Cheng's mouth to share and not even think about it. He would drunkenly sit in the bathtub at a party and watch Jiang Cheng pee instead of pausing the conversation. (Tell me you have seen some intense teenage friendships without telling me you've seen some intense teenage friendships.)

Oh, and Wei Wuxian, Jiang Cheng, and Nie Huaisang fooled around a little while drunk in the Cloud Recesses. The exact amount/degree is flexible.

12. What is your cutest headcanon?

Jin Ling may not have many friends his age, but that's because there was period where most people in new Jiang Sect were generally not having babies post-war. There just aren't that many kids his age in the sect. But he's doted on by the older disciples, who have contributed in no small way to his spoiling.

ALTERNATELY THAT WEN QING IS ALIVE. NO BODY, NO CRIME. (This is maybe just denial.)

13. What is your heart-breakingist headcanon?

Hmm, I'm not sure! How about this: Jin Ling liked Lan Xichen a lot, and—once things slow down a little after the main story—he worries about what happened to him. Not that he can do anything about it, and his seclusion is not even in the top three worst things that have happened lately, but he misses his xiao-shushu's nice friend around Jinlintai quite a bit.

Ask me fandom trash questions!

[stiltonbasket]

For the Nielan Babies, who is the favorite uncle between Huaisang and Wangji? I imagine Huaisang playing with his nephews and nieces or teaching them things about arts and i'm "aaww"

Imagine if one of the kids loves fans and ask their parents if they can fight with one.

The babies love both their uncles equally--it's just that Jingyi is also a Hanguang-jun fanboy. Yunhai has a quiet artistic side that gets lots of encouragement from Uncle NHS, Jueying is very into birds, and Nie Yunhua isn't that into the arts or birdwatching (she's a mini Nie Mingjue, so she appreciates the arts and her loved ones' interest in them, but they're not really for her).

[jaggededges123]

for the one sentence fanfic ask: In the dark, in the stillness of night, Nie Huaisang felt his presence return.

In the dark, in the stillness of night, Nie Huaisang felt his presence return.

He thought, for a moment, that it was the product of sleepless nights spent poring over and over about plans which could not be written down for the risk, a phantasm purely made up of his own grief-riddled imagination. Nie Huaisang looked up to the desk in the corner of his sect leader's quarters, where the familiar presence resided, where once the physical body of Nie Mingjue would have burnt candles until well after midnight, killing himself over something so trivial as the Qinghe Nie sect.

There was no body--Nie Huaisang could see nothing at all, except for a candle lighting itself at that desk. He--hesitantly, because he would rather die himself to a ghost which had gotten past his wards rather than harm the soul of his deceased brother, his late lover--reached into his bedside table for a talisman which would reveal that which he could not yet see.

When the ghostly form of Nie Mingjue flickered into tangible existence, guilt and relief tangled deep in Nie Huaisang's chest, and he couldn't help sobbing, sliding so very easily back into that position of "crybaby younger brother" that had been so ruthlessly taken from him just some years ago.

[kyuoki]

S.T.A.L.K.E.R: *you can drink vodka to reduce radiation poisoning* Poles: we are taking over this game

[westiec]

alternately: jiang yanli/qin su/jin guangyao/nie huaisang

I don't remember what ask game this went to, so I'm just gonna ramble.

Something something CQL AU where after rescuing Qin Su during the Sunshot Campaign, Meng Yao has to bring her to the war camp for a while, where she works with Jiang Yanli seeing to supplies and food. She's offered a chance to go to Lanling and wait out the fighting, but she's finding herself happy being useful instead of just a daughter in need of protection and making connections within the cultivation world. Qin Su was not trained as a cultivator, so she'd missed out on the Lan lectures, and Jiang Yanli is enjoying the novelty of being able to mentor someone besides the littlest shidis and shimeis.

Jiang Yanli and Nie Huaisang have been pen pals since Lan Camp, and she's still trying to decide if he's angling to marry her himself or match her up with his brother. (She doesn't think she wants a fighter for a husband; she's half-mothered two of them already.) They continue their correspondence as the war picks up steam, where Nie Huaisang proves adept at arranging for a steady supply of the kinds of things that keep morale up in a war camp: snacks and ingredients beyond the basics, good socks, ~inspiring reading material~. (Jiang Cheng and Wei Wuxian are scandalized when they realize jiejie's how those particular booklets keep showing up.)

When Jiang Yanli and Qin Su write to him that Meng Yao has disappeared, he starts listening to the rumors. Defecting to the Wen makes no sense, even with his messy departure from the Nie Sect. Something else must be going on.

(The end of the war proves him right.)

Something something soup drama doesn't happen, or happens differently, or whatever, and the xuanli betrothal stays dissolved. (Maybe Wen Qing is rescued by Jin forces and accepts a different proposal in this AU, an offer to protect her family from someone who can actually back it up. She never expected a love match anyway.)

Jiang Yanli and Nie Huaisang are courting by now, but slowly—he understands her need to stay with her brothers right now more than anyone. Qin Su keeps them both appraised of her and Jin Guangyao's efforts to secure their parents' blessings. Her mother is strangely resistant, and Nie Huaisang's spidey senses are tingling, and something something SECRETS ARE LEARNED AHEAD OF ANY WEDDINGS OR BETROTHALS.

So Qin Su becomes Nie furen, and Jin Guangyao receives permission to marry out to the Jiang Sect, and Jiang Cheng's not entirely sure why Nie Mingjue still treats it like an alliance between the Jiang and the Nie, but he's not looking that gift horse in the mouth.

(Maybe in a few more years, Jin Zixuan is watching the way Jiang Yanli and Jin Guangyao and Qin Su and Nie Huaisang all orbit around each other and realizes he and Wen Qing might have a better chance with their mutual crush in Yunmeng than they thought.)

(Wen Ning, not dead, falls head over heels for Mianmian. They have the least complicated courtship of anyone in their generation.)

[windwardstar]

Oooo oooo OOOOOO!

A man in time you’ll be

Please and thank you! (I love Tarzan, and Phil Collins, and that song! AND MDZS! I love it all 😁)

A Man in Time You'll Be (aka the trans fic I've been rambling about for months) is a mdsz fic where I finally get to put all my trans headcanons because you make the character transmasc and it changes so many things about the character and how they fit into things that my "follow this thought to the logical conclusion and overthink every aspect of world building" brain cannot just casually include.

Title is because well, that song has major transmasc vibes.

Highlights of the fic include.

WWX and LWJ both being trans guys. This solves absolutely nothing about their miscommunication of lwj having the world's largest crush on wwx and wwx not being aware of either of their crushes/dealing with the wall of internalized heteronormativity. The only good news for lwj is that congrats his crushes' no homo moments are now gender affirming because he sees you as a boy. The "you like Mianmian" line reaches new levels of lwj suffering.

NMJ's gender is just Saber. Golden Core Hrt though may actually solve some of his problems...or make them worse.

LXC has a lot of feelings about expectations and wanting to be himself vs not wanting to be selfish and disrupting social harmony by transitioning.

JGY somehow ends up with MORE daddy issues than in canon. He wants to be recognized as his father's son.

[stranded-in-the-gobi-desert]

hello....... xiyao hunger games au........ pls say more

are they both tributes

hello anon u have opened a can of worms i have been thinking abt this au for over a year. my xiyao hunger games au.... theyre technically both tributes, just not in the same games..?

they meet each other as victors, a few days after meng yao wins his games, as he waits for his victor interview with ceaser flickerman.

lan xichen had won the games previous to this, dominating both the in-game and out-of-game play, his early life career training from belonging to district 1 combined with his 'prince charming' aura makes him a favourite for the capitoltes, who clamour to sponsor him, and a BEAST in the games.

meng yao, who was not of a fan of the games as so much he saw it as an egregious feat of capitol power, and a fascinating lesson in propaganda, watched this with both awe and an analytical eye.

he would not volunteer for the games (he's neither stupid nor suicidal), but if the opportunity came to either rise up from the poor life he's living in district 11, or give his mother one less mouth to feed, he'd grab the chance with both hands.

they won in contrasting ways, due to their very different backgrounds and personalities

lan xichen won with honour (as much as children killing other children can be considered honourable). mainting his single alliance with his district mate until the end, winning with a final sword duel that had the capitolites swooning in their seats. he's the image of perfection, a low kill count leaves little blood to mar his image.

meng yao won with deception, almost all his kills coming from either literal or figurative backstabbing. as one of the underdogs, and malnourished 15 years old from district 11, he wouldnt win in a straight fight with most tributes, let alone the careers. despite this, he left a bloody trail behind him to become victor, with 2 direct and 4 infirect kills under his belt. (he's still a capitol darling, as most victors are, but in a more - we like you right now but we can and will turn on you if you make a slight mistake)

meng yao did not expect to win once reaped and is struggling to deal with being alive when he thought he'd be dead, so is having a minor breakdown waiting to be interviewed.

lan xichen decides to visit the new victor and give them some advice on how to deal with the victory tour and [gestures vageuly to capitol] that, and kindly interrupts the start of said breakdown. this somehow leads into mimicking the iconic hand-caressing-intense-eye-contact-meeting scene from cql (i love the scenet too much not to include it).

ANYWAYS this is getting too long now, but just know that meng yao had a MASSIVE crush on lan xichen as he watched him win his games, and if it weren't for his mini breakdown whilst waiting to be interviewed he would totally be internally fangirling, and that lan xichen is completealy enamoured with meng yao after meeting him once.

they become a favourite capitol pairing (not couple just yet), constrasting heights and images creating a perfect pair (this is self indulgeant).

hopefully this makes some sense to u anon, and u enjoyed the rambling

[pbaintthetb]

Since you're currently rewatching House... "I wish you would write a fic where" the MDZS crew are in a modern day AU and NHS drags NMJ to House because of his strange qi deviation symptoms :) Bonus points if Wen Qing is one of House's interns!

oooh very interesting idea. So, I took a stab and have about 2.5k of random segments (not chronological sorry) I did find the voices kind of hard to get

s1-3 era i guess if only because it's the original duckinglins + wen qing. It's also slightly unclear whether cultivation exists in this and if so whether people know about it or not but eh

If i do more segments, becuase i had some in mind I will reblog this and add on to it but I make zero promises. Not sure how many of the things you wanted I hit but I had fun spitballing, even if the House and WQ voice is hard

***

“I didn’t realise they let war criminals work in hospitals these days,” Mingjue comments, it’s meant to sound idle, but to Huaisang it sounds icey. He expects it sounds pretty damn icey to Wen Qing too.

“Good thing I’m not a war criminal then,” Wen Qing refutes with a tight smile, moving her stethoscope to Da-ge’s back. Mingjue humphs, Huaisang digs into his thigh with his key through his trouser pocket and wishes he didn’t have to be so responsible.

Not because he wants Xichen or A-Yao to be doing this (not necessarily at least) just… Huaisang had moved heaven and earth to be here and frankly he’d rather not. They haven’t met Dr House either yet… though from what Nie Huaisang had read that might actually be a good thing.

He looks at his brother and Wen Qing again, her face is in deep concentration, and Mingjue’s is furrowed in an expression that means discomfort of some kind. What kind, Huaisang doesn’t know. For all he prides himself as a brother, he’s no expert in reading the microexpressions. 

And a lot has happened recently, a lot of things that could be causing discomfort in all kinds of ways.

Or maybe it’s even guilt for how he’s been acting. Huaisang wouldn’t know. His brother has been a growing stranger to him these past few months. And then last night…

Nie Huaisang looks at his brother in Wen Qing’s hands and thinks about maybe getting some air, maybe even going on a walk to the coma ward. But he can’t bear to leave his brother, and as he looks at Wen Qing, he feels- somewhat despondently- that she’s a lot stronger than he is.

But Nie Huaisang doesn’t want to be strong, Da-ge’s strong, Huaisang is persistent and weak. Which is why he’s dragged his brother here, despite all the complaining. He knows he’s only being humoured, and he knows why he’s being humoured.

But Huaisang will take a hundred burnt fans if it means a healthy Da-ge. Besides, a hundred burnt fans would still leave the nice one Jiang Cheng got him after they left that Gusu Summer camp a while back.

“How long have you been having these symptoms?” Wen Qing asks clinically, bringing Huaisang’s focus back into the room. He chides himself, what is the point of being here if he doesn’t pay the utmost attention?

***

“Don’t you wonder how your intern and Guangyao know each other?” the big guy demands. The way the big guy spits the name suggests some kind of history there. House is kind of interested, except he expects it’ll be pretty banal so, maybe not.

“I don’t know,” House drawls, twirling his cane, “She’s a renowned doctor, he’s an innovative music therapist, both working at hospitals in New Jersey- of course!” he gasps sarcastically, “Did they meet in a sex dungeon?” He tuts, shaking his head, “Naughty, naughty Qing. First Chase, now her- do you reckon she uses those needles for extra-curricular purposes?”

Just for good measure House throws in a leer. If he’s reading this guy right, wound up and uptight as he is, he’s about to lunge. Which means House can get him restrained. Which means House has a better chance of doing the tests he wants with the consent of the obviously confused, and obviously devoted little brother.

There’s a story there too… but House has no time for sob stories.

The big guy stares at him flatly.

“There’s no shame  in sex, that would be a stupid reason for me to be angry at them.”

Interesting.

“Whoa! Who said anything about being angry?” House asks all mock confused,�� “I thought we were just discussing how they met?”

The patient gives him another side eye.

“You’re not half as slick as you think you are.” With that the guy settles back down in bed.

Which is just hurtful really. Also interesting. House doesn’t exactly think he’s trying to be slick, so it’s interesting that the patient thinks he is.

***

“Cuddy’s been hunting House all day to get him to do his clinic hours,” the blond doctor explains, probably to his colleagues, because they adopt matching expressions of complete comprehension.

“Oh really,” Da-ge hums, expression unimpressed, and he’s looking right at Huaisang. Huaisang gulps. “Sounds lik-”

Whatever it was that Da-ge was going to say shirking work sounded like (and Huaisang has really no idea!) is cut off by the sudden spew of blood from his mouth.

Sadly- and it really is, at this point Huaisang is kind of used to it so he’s not even-

He’s not even surprised.

He still screams and flinches though, crying and begging the doctors to do something.

And they do, running around, saying words just short of a yell that all sound very serious and complicated. So Nie Huaisang stops yelling,  because nobody needs his words too.

***

Mingjue doesn’t like Dr. House because the man is a dick. It does not mean, however, that he doesn’t respect him. Dr House is honest, at least. Unlike some people. Dr House is honest about having no real regard for Mingjue, no respect for order or regulations, a purely academic understanding of morality and being a curmudgeony arse.

Nie Mingjue isn’t overly fond of Wen Qing either, though that’s less to do with her skills and her honour. Mingjue has faith in those because he’s experienced them first hand. He just doesn’t like her.

Plenty of people have done things they didn’t really like very much in circumstances they’d infinitely prefer to not be in. But there’s always a choice but Wen Qing had made hers, and Mingjue- well. What happened happened in the way it did.

House, Dr House is staring at him rather intently. Mingjue lets him, he’s used to being stared at. He hit six-foot when he was fourteen, and he’s six-four now with the breadth to match. And he’s used to being stared at because ever since their father died all the questions have been directed at him. And he’d certainly been stared at under Men- Jin Guangyao’s dark stare in that room wit-

Mingjue cuts off that train of thought, feeling his head pound. The Doctor is still staring at him, leaning forward.

“Your brother thinks you’re crazy, you know? Cuckoo, loo-loo, the whole works.”

Mingjue doesn’t say anything, his hands fist in the sheets. He knows. He knows Xichen thinks so too and that’s why nobody ever listens to anything he says. They look at him and see his father twenty years too soon.

But Huaisang didn’t drag him here to have his head looked at. Huaisang’s happy to defer to Xichen and the rat about that. Mingjue knows that, he knows that. He’s here because Huaisang sees their father twenty-years too soon and there’s been a countdown going off in his didi’s head since the first time he found the bloody tissues Mingjue had stuffed in the bin in an ill-thought out plan of hiding them.

Honestly though, how was he to suspect Huaisang would be looking in the rubbish, the little brat never did any tidying and now Mingjue is here when it’s all-

“Huh,” Dr House says thoughtfully, “You do know. Maybe you’re not crazy then, crazy’s not usually so self-aware.”

Mingjue’s not so sure. Their father had been self-aware enough between all the moments where he wasn’t to be horrified. Not that that horror had done much, locked into an endless battle with their father’s pride. He’s not sure how to word all of this to Dr House, and he’s not even sure if he wants to. So he doesn’t.

Mingjue’s here because Huaisang wants him to be here and Mingjue wants Huaisang to be safe. Mingjue’s proud, but not so proud as their father. If he lashes out here there’s a syringe of haldol waiting for him and orderlies to hold Huaisang back.

Mingjue would prefer not to be here, but if Huaisang won’t let him alone (and Mingjue knows his didi can’t) then this is the best place to be.

“Ignoring me won’t make me go away, you know,” the irritating doctor singsongs. It tempts Mingjue to try, even though he’s had years of a little brother and is very well acquainted with this fact.

***

“San-ge and Er-ge would never hurt Da-ge,” Huaisang objects, voice going high with his wail. They swore a brotherhood! Sure, things aren’t so good right now, but things aren’t always so good with Huaisang and Mingjue and neither would hurt the other.

The stupid Dr House just cocks his head. Wen Qing is standing a little behind him, face carefully blank.

“Very convincing. You convinced enough to stake your brother’s life on that?”

“I-” Huaisang starts, stops. Heart trembles. It feels like a betrayal. Saying no. Saying yes.

He looks at Wen Qing and thinks about the coma ward, three floors down, 2 corridors across.

“I wouldn’t stake my brother’s life on anything,” he refutes. Concession, admission, permission, whatever.

***

“I don’t know,” Foreman responds, “My brother and I? We were never like that.”

Chase is sprawled out in a chair, Cameron is the same but she’s doing a much better job of making it look elegant. Foreman is leaning forward with his elbows on the table, hands clasped.

And Wen Qing is standing there, like it’s her first day again, an outsider.

It’s this case, she knows the patient and she doesn’t know him and she- Well she doesn’t know much about Huaisang. But A-Ning had said enough things before that she’s just…

But as much as she doesn’t really know either of the brothers, she does know this.

“Both their mothers died in childbirth, and their father’s been dead for over a decade,” Wen Qing interjects, walking over to the coffee pot so she doesn’t have to look at them. She thought she’d buried this when she’d moved here. Except for A-Ning; she could never bury him, Wen Qing refuses. 

“They’ve only got each other.” The pot’s empty and she scowls in disgust. “Siblings like that- they either can’t stand each other or they’d do anything for each other.” Maybe both. She doesn’t think of a certain little brother of her own, because she’s on the job right now and even as she’s always thinking of him she can’t.

“They’re half brothers?” Cameron asks, and Wen Qing won’t take this accusation.

“Yeah it’s in their history, I-”

“No- no,” Cameron waves her off, “It’s just- Huaisang seems so convinced as much as it’s like their father’s illness, it’s different- and Huaisang seems utterly unaffected. What if it’s something Mingjue got from his mother?”

“What, like a completely different condition that just mimics the one his father had?” Foreman snorts, kicking out his legs, “That’s likely.”

“Or maybe…” Chase starts like he’s had a thought, “It’s some kind of [interaction]. He got his father’s illness, and he’s got something from his mother that’s making it act like this.”

They all consider that for a moment.

“We need to tell House.” Wen Qing’s already walking out of the room.

***

“The mental symptoms!” House yells, “The guy’s got fucking PTSD- and nobody noticed, not even his supposedly so devoted brother.”

“But-”

“Oh jeez, if only there was a reason that the mental symptoms were so much more aggressive and and in flux than what they reported of his father- if only there were a doctor on my team who knew the patient, but-”

Wen Qing burns, she burns so hard she can’t even hear the insult to her character House is no doubt lumping out. She can’t talk about this, she can’t.

Meng Yao’s, or whatever he’s calling himself these days, has good fucking lawyers, and enough skills to have kept himself alive under her Uncle’s watchful eye for a year. Wen Qing had signed, and signed, and A-Ning’s upstairs and Meng Yao’s somewhere else and-

Mingjue is worth nothing compared to A-Ning, do no harm be damned. And not even Huaisang’s fury is enough of a motivation. She understand that fury, she understands it well, it burns inside her everyday her brother doesn’t wake up.

“I said,” Wen Qing hisses, aware of the stares of her fellow interns on her, and the genuine angry glare of House, “That I suspected he’d been through trauma recently- as did his brother!”

House does not look calmed in the slightest, he takes a step toward her.

“Well maybe next time use the word ‘torture’. It’s got a certain buzz that really makes it shine out as an alarm bell.”

Her ears ring, and ring. She can’t say anything, and if anyone else is speaking, she can’t hear it.

***

Wilson doesn’t know how he always ends up in House’s conference room dragged into a case that clearly isn’t cancer and therefore doesn’t need an Oncologist to consult. But, well, House is House (demanding bastard) and Wilson is Wilson (needy bitch) so maybe he does know.

The children as House would term them are all throwing out theories and Wilson is following along well enough to understand, but nothing’s sounding like cancer and House never hired Wilson so he’s not really giving out any theories.

That’s when the man walks in. Anybody unknown walking into Houses’ office can go a few ways, so Wilson preemptively prepares for something to be thrown. Except the guy’s just looking at Wilson.

“You have another doctor in your team?” the man asks House uncertainly, but he’s still looking obsessively at Wilson. It’s kind of weird.

“No, no, I’m just here as a consult,” Wilson explains politely, “Dr James Wilson.” He extends a hand.

The man- who’s kind of more of a kid takes it nervously, still staring at him.

“You’re an oncologist,” the unknown guy, who is probably related to House’s current patient in some way, states. Brother? 

“Yeah I am,” Wilson chuckles awkwardly, mentally kicking himself. “How did you know that?” Because if he knew the patient knew he was an oncologist, he wouldn’t have said. Nobody likes hearing you’re an oncologist, unless you’re saying you’ll never see them again. And even then, sometimes they don’t like it.

“It’s on your door,” the brother of the patient says, still sounding uncertain. “Does this mean you think my brother has… uh- I mean, whatever it is that oncologists treat?” his voice has gone up at the end.

Mentally, Wilson is raising a brow, externally he is not. He is a professional and actually knows what the term ‘bedside manner’ means, unlike some people in this room.

House doesn’t raise a brow either, but that’s because House doesn’t believe in restricting yourself to non-verbal symbols of rude disbelief when words can be twice as insulting.

“Whatever oncologists treat,” House drawls mock sympathetic, the patient’s brother twitches with what could be embarrassment. “No, we don’t. Dr Wilson is just here to stare at Cameron’s ass. Or maybe Chase’s- who can tell them apart from behind?!” 

Wilson looks to the ceiling for salvation while House guffaws and Chase and Cameron scowl.

The guy is still looking at Wilson, and taking pity, Wilson divulges.

“No, we don’t think he has cancer.”

The guy nods, not as if this is good news, but rather as if this is news he’s always known.

***

“Brother shops around for the best diagnostician he can find, but doesn’t even know what an oncologist is?” House shakes his head and helps himself to some of Wilson’s fries. Wilson offers a put-upon expression in return, but he hasn’t touched his drink so he’s probably not actually put upon. Besides, Wilson knows House is going to eat his food, if he wants it to stop happening he should stop buying it.

“So?” Wilson asks, playing his role of audience participation in their private one-man show as always. “I didn’t realise that your webpage had the definition of oncology on it- right underneath your name I suppose?.”

House shoots him a look for the snark. And the blatant missing of the obvious point.

“The first thing anybody does, when they google symptoms is find cancer,” House explains, Wilson nods, so maybe he gets it too now. Gets how weird it is- and House doesn’t like things that don’t make sense.

“Ok,” Wilson is still nodding and House takes some more fries while he’s distracted, “But isn’t he here because he thinks his brother has what their dad had? Which wasn’t cancer? So he doesn’t think it’s cancer, so doesn’t need an oncologist. He’s deadset on it being this one thing so he’s not looking at anything else.”

House shakes his head, he doesn’t know what it is or why it’s bothering him but it is.

“He’s here because he thinks it’s not operating like what their dad had, which is when worried younger siblings start running down the cancer route and looking for the best Oncologist they can find-” he shoots Wilson a significant look “-but he skips that altogether and brings his brother here- his sick brother who’s been sick for a while but only just agreed to come.”

It’s interesting, it’s a puzzle. House likes puzzles and he’d rather puzzle out what’s affecting the older brother right now, but a man can always multitask.

[i-like-plan-m]

hi ❤️ for the wip game, genius/gifted? or maybe dad?

Hi, thank you for the ask!! This is a continuation of Attempt the Impawsible… yes, the WWX-cursed-into-a-cat crack fic 😅 it had a lot of setup for a modern au with magic and I keep going back to play with a (tentative) part 2:

The cultivation world had mostly acknowledged that Wei Ying was a once-in-a-generation genius, and that grudging acceptance could mostly be attributed to Nie Huaisang’s petty nature.

A couple years after the Jiangs disowned Wei Ying, Nie Huaisang discovered he was essentially giving away his priceless inventions to every random citizen who asked for his help. Rather than let the sects swoop in and claim those inventions for themselves— no doubt to mass produce and then sell them at unimaginable prices— or continue to benefit from Wei Ying’s hard work, Nie Huaisang silently appointed himself as Wei Ying’s agent and patented every last one of his inventions on his behalf. The legality of that whole process was extremely questionable, especially since he hadn’t even notified Wei Ying of these plans, but considering they only found out after Huaisang showed up with a stack of approved patents and an even larger stack of money, none of them argued.

And so Wei Ying became famous in the cultivation world almost overnight.

[tavina-writes]

For the fandom trash asks: you said you have many heart breaking headcanons so please more (13)

13. what is your heart-breakingist headcanon

Hmmm I do have a lot of these but some of them are rather specifically attached to certain aus and or need to be explained at length before I whack you with "how do the glass shards feel? :D"

Anyway, did you know that the 'jue' of Nie Mingjue refers to a jade ring with a gap in it?

Fun fond theory that NHS, despite loving all sorts of other jewelry and other types of rings, wears only jue after the death of his brother. Because there's a gap in his heart now too. :D

[least-carpet]

hiya!! sangcheng for the fucked up ship bingo?

Hello! Thanks for the ask :)

I thought there would be more squares. I like sangcheng!

I think the varieties of sangcheng I like are either 1) cloud recesses students ~~exploring each others' bodies or 2) post-canon but involving some reckoning with, like, the full weight of their grief and also their bad personalities, which I guess all fall under the "playing with them like dolls" square.

[procrastinatorproject]

For the WIP Folder Game. First of all, how do you expect me to choose one? After much deliberation, I narrowed it down to "Calluses" and "Dino Hunt" 😁

It is wild to me with what kind of precision all of you are picking these stories :D @jazzfic managed to zero in on the one Agnebal snippet, you picked the two fics that aren't even in the same list but are actually closely connected... I love it so much!

So, those two stories were originally inspired by @regionalpancake. I think I was feeling very bad at the time (a couple years back) and asked for prompts for holo-stories I could write. Pancakes came in with "Calluses", "no you stop it!" and "DINOSAURS!". And because the brain was in a bad place, I never ended up really doing much with it, but I do still have two bits of fic in my wip folder based on those prompts.

For the dino story, I only have one paragraph.

The insect looked similar to the stickflies that bred in the southern swamps on Vashti during the harvest months. They swarmed the fields once the drones and workers left, and feasted on the husks and straw left in the sandy earth. As a child, Elnor would sometimes ask Zani to let him walk down to the hill overlooking the monastery’s grain fields after dinner, so he could listen to their songs. Stickflies made the most tantilizing music by rubbing their five pairs of iridescent wings together. This specimen did not make music with its wings, maybe because it only had four, but it hummed a gently oscillating tone as it approached.

Well, one paragraph and one sentence. I think the idea was that there has been some holodeck malfunction and a bunch of terrifying prehistoric creatures have broken free and taken over La Sirena (given that she has holo-emitters throughout). And Elnor and the others are trying to round them up and herd them back into the holodeck before someone gets hurt. But alas, I don't have any additional notes here.

As for calluses, I have a few hundred words of dialogue between Ian and Soji. But I actually really like the notes I wrote underneath, so I'm gonna share those! (The square brackets are how I mark notes where a story isn't written out but I only have bits of summary)

[The holos, as many computers are want to do, build heuristics to do certain tasks more quickly. These connections get strengthened and over time, they form a map of sorts, that will show you what they do often, the same way calluses might for humans. Emmet likes to externalize many of his internal structures, similar to the way the captain likes to keep his scars. For the captain, it’s partially self-neglect, but it’s also a way to know where he’s been and keep a record of things that have happened and that were real. For Emmet, it’s absolutely the latter. [Soji has been thinking about externalizing some of her memories. Memories of Dahj, of childhood adventures. Dahj had a scar on her ankle that Soji remembers being from a kayaking trip they went on in the Pudget Sound. They rescued some wild animal — Dahj always loved animals! Soji knows the story is fake and the scar was fake and it’s all very frustrating, but she would like some kind of permanent reminder of the things she has accomplished and the past she has lived] [Ian suggests that Emil would probably be very pissed if Soji hurt herself to get some kind of cosmetic scar. But maybe she can talk to Emmet about getting a tattoo. As for calluses to show what she has accomplished: her brain is a map of all the things that have defined her. Dahj has left a mark there, and she can choose to express this in a myriad of small ways. And whichever one she chooses, Ian will help her get there.]

I feel like this is extremely on brand for me: thinking A Lot about how the holos function on a technological level and what that means for them as people. And also thinking and writing about Soji's relationship with Dahj and her manufactured past and memories. There's so much there there, and I really want to explore that more in the future!

(I cannot get over how you managed to pick these two, out of the dozen wip titles in that list 🤣 Absolutely brilliant! And thank you so much for the opportunity to dig through some old stories and reread my own writing. It's a real joy to do this kind of personal archaeology!)

Also: I had completely forgotten that there was a third prompt, too! I might have to create another WIP jut to make a note of that. Maybe it'll give me some inspiration 🤔

---

I'm still very happy to answer questions or post snippets of the many things in my WIP folder :D Here's the original list of titles if you want to see what's available!

[pauloesska]

Character ask game: 1, 2, 5, 7, 8, 13, 20

Ketling

hyhy oczywiście, że on mój najmilejszy

Będę musiała lawirować między jego trzema wersjami tutaj, ale lecimy z tym

My first impression of them; When I think I truly started to like them Chciałabym wiedzieć. "Przygody pana Michała" to była moja pierwsza porządna styczność z Trylogią, więc na pewno mnie on już wtedy urzekł. Myślę, że mogę powiedzieć, że to była miłość od pierwszego wejrzenia. Książkowy Ketling też potem zrobił swoje, zwłaszcza ten emo bombelek z Potopu. Co ciekawe nie byłam też tak bardzo negatywnie nastawiona do wersji Nowickiego na początku. Dopiero serwer trylogiowy zrobił ze mną co zrobił xD

My favorite ship of them KETLING X MICHAŁ, KULBAKA HUSBANDS, DUH

A quote of them that you remember Mam tu zacytować cały monolog o miłości???

Your favorite outfit of them Kocham jak w książce pojawia się z pięknym czerwonym kontuszu, ale nie dane nam było tego zobaczyć na ekranie. Jeśli chodzi o ekranizacje to zdecydowanie ten odświętny i to właśnie tak jak go Łapicki nosi, bo imo lepiej wystylizowany, z wysokimi butami i bez oczojebnej różowej szarfy. Generalnie nie podobają mi się kolory tego na filmowej wersji, w czerni i bieli wygląda dużo korzystniej.

Your favorite friendship they have Nigdy nie przestanę dziękować PPM za zrobienie z niego i Adasia Nowowiejskiego besties.

A weird headcanon Jeszcze się nigdy nie wyspowiadałam z moich headcanonów o nim, tyle że większość odnosi się do jego dzieciństwa i jak to stało, że trafił ze Szkocji do Polski. A czy konkretnie coś niecodziennego w tych headcanonach mam??? eeee myślałam o tym i wsm i tak wszystkie są w oparciu o to co jest w kanonie, bo z tego można naprawdę dużo wycisnąć. Ostatnio myślałam o tym, że Ketling z Michałem musieli mieć bardzo przykry breakup, kiedy ten drugi postanowił się hajtnąć z Anusią.

[bytedykes]

Nie mingjue and liu qingge for the character ask game?

Sexuality Headcanon: im a nieyao/3zun truther so like he likes men... lqg is my beautiful aroace swordguy <333

Gender Headcanon: I LOVE BUTCH WOMEN!!!! ok both of them are men to me as canon, but like. take my hand. butch nmj and he/him butch lqg okay?

A ship I have with said character: i guess i already said but Big fan of nieyao i like it when weird assholes tear each other into pieces ^-^ 3zun is also good. for lqg i like him in bingliushen but only the way i personally like it and not the way people usually do it. hes a part of their marriage in the sense that he's their nonsexual nonromantic chew toy that they like sooo much. also lqg/tlj can be really good sometimes (thinking of raitala's 'the reluctant suitor' series - very nice tianliu series but also one of my fave lqg characterizations i've seen lol he's such a weirdo in this one)

A BROTP I have with said character: nmj and nhs!!! i love you nie siblings you rock. also i like nielan childhood friends i think its very fun especially when they start falling apart in the later years <3 an interesting take ive seen before also is nmj&wq which is pretty fun. LQG&SQQ THE BESTIES <3 theyre everything !!! i really like them i like how much they genuinely enjoy each others company and how fucking Bad they are at like. being in a friendship its awesome. also as a treat for myself lqg&yqy is sooo tasty i love it when lqg genuinely likes and looks up to him and yqy is fond of him in turn. could a sect leader and his coworker-subordinate really be... friends?

A NOTP I have with said character: obviously ew incest ships but aside from that i cant really think of anything? lqg x romance my notp i think he's so aro. also okay. okay honestly. liushen sometimes NOT all the time but sometimes the way ppl act about it irks me and i automatically look away. like the blatantly ooc fandomized liushen. bye </3

A random headcanon: lqg forest puddle water drinkerrrr dkjaskdss no im kidding im kidding. my random headcanon ("random headcanon" lol) is that he has good dad energy. he could pull thru. give that man a baby :] can i plug spring in bloom here again does anyone want to read spring in bloom by kay my friend kay <3 also i think he's immune to sex pollen bc he's an aroace jock who just exercises it out of his system. no basis for this one other than it's hilarious

for nmj... i think he secretly has a very annoying sense of humor that many people don't know about but he terrorizes nhs with. dad jokes type of beat... da-ge jokes <3

General Opinion over said character: I FUCKING LOVE THESE GUYS!!!!! i love it when there is a guy with a big fucking sword who has sooo many problems. lol! anyway ok more specifically:

i thought nmj was very interesting while reading the novel and definitely had a "hey wtf dude" initial reaction to him, but he's reallyyy grown on me <3 partially bc he's been on my mind a lot and partially bc of his presence in cql! (cql nmj is my type also so that definitely did smth to me as well lol) i think he's a really interesting character to explore both bc of his general backstory and bc of his relationships w other characters, as well as the fact that (in the novel) we never really see him of completely sound mind, so there's lots of room to play w how you portray him. he's fun!

lqg i love soooo much i loved him from day ONE i loved him as soon as he showed up. he's so good. i think his appearance was a very funny surprise (?), esp the way sqq narrated it lmao, and i really like him in general. i loveee the loyal sword character trope and i like how lqg does it (so well <3). his general awkwardness and extreme talent to put his foot in his mouth is also really charming ("its ok you can just get a new disciple" what is wrong with him). i also think there's room to explore w him, especially his family + relationships w other sect members, i love you liu siblings... lqg is a character who goes through a lot of growth imo and it's very satisfying to see that + how his rs with sqq changes through the novel. lqg is also a character that is so fun to put into situations and also make fun of. bc he's so sucks <3 ANYWAY I FUCKING LOVE LQG if there is no lqg lovers on this earth i am dead etc

TYSM FOR THE ASK KAY <333 sorry it took me so long to answer LMAO it was really fun though