#ngl those two are weirdly good and i love them

[ikebanaka]

My top 3 One Piece ships are, in order:

Frobin

BabySai (Sai/Baby 5)

NamiVivi

[loozerboykisser]

PJO characters as dumb things me and my friends ( bonus one with my parents ) have said part two

Will: what's your type?

Nico: you

Will:

Will: that's sweet but I meant blood type

-

Percy: oh fuck I'm blue now

Percy: but like actually blue

Percy: like a smurf

Percy: being sad's for idiots lmao

-

Leo: everyone hates me lol

Jason: what am I??? like???

-

Nico: and Axl Rose's real name wasn't Axl Rose

Percy: *crying* STOP

-

Will: easiest way to come out to people is tell them that you listen to coldplay

-

Nico: Im gonna fugging krill myself

Annabeth: krill????

Nico: isn't that like a fish or smth

-

Piper: *knocking on Leo's door* WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN THERE

Leo: uh shit uh erm uh

Leo: *moans loudly*

-

Will: *joking* we should makeout

Nico: I really wanna

Will: what

Nico: ...

Nico: did I say that out loud

-

Piper: *sobbing* why are penises so ugly

-

Annabeth: math is weirdly calming to me sometimes ngl

Annabeth: *flips page over to read massive paragraphs of words*

Annabeth: *bursts into tears*

-

Will: I just had to help hatch a baby chick

Will:

Will: I'm waiting for applause it was so gross

-

Will: if you drink the water I'll give you a forehead smooch

Nico: *glances at water, thinking*

Nico: nah you wanna give me one anyway

Will: gods dammit

-

Rachel: *GASP* MY SKETCHBOOK

Rachel: MY BABY

Rachel: *kisses it*

-

Hazel: ugh I want someone to fuck me

Hazel: hahah jk that shit's nasty

-

Piper: yeah I've noticed after watching you for a bit that you smile whenever Nico messages

Will: aww that's so swee-

Will: wait why are you watching me

Piper: *stares into his soul*

-

Nico: I miss you

Nico: *replies an hour later* that was a moment of weakness fuck you

-

Will: what if I say "darling" in a seductive voice

Nico: no

Will: u sure?

Nico: I ahdiamdveip dnsjhbksahcblaiwcbjsd-

-

Will: like at first I wanted to be you but then I realized that there's a diffrence between wanting to "be you" and wanting to "be on you"

-

Percy: I'm depressed

Percy: ...

Percy: WAIT I HAVE COOKIES NVM

-

Will: wtf are hickeys??

Will: I'm an experimental learner btw

-

Leo: omg guys look the guitar strings made my finger darker

Leo: *looks at finger* do you like watermelon, sir?

Will: you are so close to being hit in the head

-

Frank: *points* haha you've been fingered

Hazel:

Hazel: love... no

-

Thalia: OMG IM GONNA BE BREATHING THE SAME AIR AS RYAN GULDEMOND

Reyna: technically you already are

Thalia: *passes out*

-

Octavian: ugh I'm so single

Nico: *sighs* me too

Nico:

Nico: WAIT I CANT SAY THAT ANYMORE

Nico: FUCK YEEEEEEEEAH *smashes table*

-

Annabeth: what's ur favourite animal I'm gonna buy you something

Percy: shark but don't waste your money

Annabeth: but my parents told me to spend it on something important

Percy:

Percy: *cries*

-

Will: I'm autism!!

Will: *turns to Nico, wiggle eyebrows* I could be in you

Nico: tism rizz????

-

Frank: I love these drama videos

Reyna: *massive bags under her eyes* why do you want more drama wtf

-

Jason: honestly scared to sit on the edges of chairs at my trans boyfriend's house

-

Percy: *over text* jason are you gay for me

Jason:

Jason:

Jason:

Jason: no gtg

Percy: he's hiding something

-

Piper: don't mean to be heterophobic but why is straight porn so gross

Nico: agreed gay porn is much better

Piper: IM SORRY WHAT

-

Percy: are there any not cool lesbians

Reyna: I mean they probably exsist

Annabeth: no

-

Leo: *sighs sadly* cock and ball torture

-

Will: guys I learnt how to play my favourite song on guitar *starts playing good lookin by dixon dallas*

-

Leo: *playing adopt me*

Leo: chat chat guess what I'm on acid

Percy: KARMA'S A BITCH

Percy: I SHOULDA KNOWN BETTER

Leo: wait since when do you play adopt me

Percy:

-

Reyna: yk those yummy smelling shampoos

Nico: yea

Reyna: well I went to walmart and thought I found some and started smelling it but this lady was giving me weird looks

Nico: oh?

Reyna: yeah

Reyna: so uh

Reyna: it was lube

-

Will: hey bbg *winks*

Nico: I will slam you down and makeout with you right now

-

Percy: hi

Jason: hi

*leaves swirl around them*

-

Leo: don't mind me just massaging my clit

-

Leo: NICO GET UR GYAT OVER HERE

Nico: WHAT????

Leo: *points* HOMOSEXUAL TENDANCIES

Nico: WHAT DID U SAY

Leo: HOMOSEXUAL TENDANCIES

Nico: OH

Nico: I HEARD SEXUAL TENDANCIES

-

Leo: *singing* coked up dick sucking hoe?

Jason: *walks in*

Jason:

Leo: oh haiiii

-

Leo: how does it feel to be Draco Malfoy

Jason: idk how does it feel to be tweek

Leo: idk pretty good

-

Reyna: you don't deserve it

Percy: yeah I do

Percy: I've been a good boy

Percy:

Percy: jesus I just turned myself on wtf

-

Leo: *in sad voice* I'm a cheeseburger

Jason: a sexy little cheeseburger

-

Will: *gets text from Nico*

Annabeth: SIMP

Will: ???

Annabeth: YOU SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMPPPPPPPPPP *has siezure*

-

Will: darling

Nico: *throws phone, screams into pillow, face red* I hate that man

anyway part three will cum ( pun intended )

thanks to @crowwolf8 @justagremlinoncaffeine @localcosplaymushroom @secret-mewtwo and my om and dad for being inspiring an shit

[thewalrusespublicist]

Hi! What are your thoughts on Paul's relationship Jane Asher? It seems very not affectionate, and even that Paul didn't care about it at all, Jane a little bit more than him but also not really? So a PR relationship? But if yes, why? It's pretty bizarre to me when I look at it . What do you think?

Hi anon!,

I think there’s a bit of a misconception about their relationship that lingers because neither of them have talked about it and it ended terribly (iconic break-up though Jane just amazing). Linda's illness meant that Jane was also airbrushed from MYFN out of respect for her (Peter Cox keeping a copy of Jane's cookbook to pull out and set Linda off about her own autobiography is both worrying and hilarious). All of that makes it seem like she was a blip.

The reality was that Paul and Jane were sweethearts who were deeply loving and affectionate. There's been a lot of really good compilation of quotes and lovely images which I'll link here and here. In short though, Paul lived with the Asher's for years, took time to spend on just her, alludes to missing her on Sgt Pepper and were remarked on as being a lovely couple by people like Ray Connolly, Cynthia and Patrick Stewart weirdly. I can't remember where I saw it but there was this article after Paul was with Linda where he's says something like 'Jane and I are still in love with each other like you are with exes but hey ho!' (I remember it clearly because it was a huge WHAT moment, please if anyone has it I'd be so grateful.) When they split Paul spent weeks crying on Alistair Taylor's shoulder about how he'd lost his 'closest friend', the one he told everything to and he could be himself around. Jane loved him for him and showed him a whole new world and scene. She was a huge part of his life, to the point he dedicated part of 'Eye of the Storm' decades later to her.

So if they were this big love story, why did they split? Well aside from the tinnnyy little cheating issue, they just weren't suited at that life-stage. They met when she was 17 and he'd just turned 21 and broke up when she was 22 and he was 26. People change a lot as they get older and suddenly life plans get in the way. Jane didn’t want children then and wanted her own career whilst Paul is one of the most instinctively paternal, baby-crazy men I’ve ever heard of and had at the time a view of a ‘traditional’ wife that stayed at home with the children. Those two alone are deal-breakers for any relationship. In the Hunter Davies bio it seems they are trying to work the career thing out but there is no way on gods green earth that Paul would give up on the prospect of children.

Then there were the other problems. According to Ray Connolly, Jane didn't like Paul’s drug taking, the affairs, his preoccupation with the Beatles and that he seemed closer to John than her and prioritised their relationship over her (💀). Jane quite fairly wanted to be number one and Paul did try to prioritise her with weeks alone after India in Scotland. However at the end of the day Paul was too enmeshed with the Beatles and especially John to give her that starring position.

So yeah, Jane played a really important part in Paul's life in the 60s, they had a deep and cherished relationship but ultimately they wanted different things and really no one could come between Paul and John ... except themselves.

(Also ngl if you wrote 'we can work it out' about me I would have throttled you Jane has some patience goood god.)

[f0point5]

intro throughts

Logan being a little pookie, a bit like cute hamster, but he got BUFFED over winter break, wouldn't recognize him if compared to his first race last year

Kevin looking normal, would appreciate maybe a little bit from distance, having his face that close was almost uncomfortable, not bad though

Zhou looking good, I love his hair

appreciate Daniel just smirking, not actual wide smile that close to the camera, love his beard, gives "your daughter calls me daddy" vibe

Nico challenging his pose for future political career

Valterri and his mullet plus his highlighter green suit, not great not terrible, looks better with the bleached hair (at least in my opinion)

Yuki looking like a robot, sorry our Japanese sweetheart they did you dirty

Alex and his natural hair, appreciate it, plus loving the white suit

not gonna lie, that shot of Ocon did things to me that I'm not so sure about

Pierre looking like he wants to kill you (knowing how tall he is, it's how he would have to look up to me as well, makes it quite funny), great shot of his eyes

Lance... where did that hair come from man?!

Oscar, oh my adored Mr Koala. not a bad word about you (insert Kris Jenner's "you're doing great sweetie") - his eyes his neck his hair, consider me dead thank you

George's eyes look so huge there, for some reason he reminds me of The Boss Baby 😂 good thing he didn't do anything stupid or cringe-y this time

can we talk about how proportionally perfect Carlos is? also those eyes see to your very SOUL you perverts!

they did Lando dirty, kinda sad that they did him from afar

Charles being Charles. no other words needed

NANDOOOO! Grandpa of the grid looking amazing, whoever decided to use this shot deserves a raise

Lewis looking like he's preparing for a boxing match, but in a weirdly hot way

not sure about Checo, he stands there kinda like a 🧍🏻‍♂️, love his eyes though

and Max. oh mister please have a mercy with my poor heart, that little smirk and those eyes will keep me awake at night!

that's it, I'm done 😂

Logan did indeed bulk up. I keep seeing videos of him in the paddock and I’m like damn son you had a lot of steak over Christmas.

Don’t talk to me about Ocon. I’m going through something with him at the minute and I’m deeply ashamed.

Oscar is really having a moment. I hope it lasts all year.

They need to stop doing close ups of Daniel.

I liked Lando’s actually. He is a short king but he’s a cutie, and Orange is his colour.

Fernando has definitely had Botox or a chemical peel and he is looking incredible. INCREDIBLE.

Lewis looking kinda hot ngl he isn’t a bit of me but that promo really was.

The Ferrari boys and just models. You can’t even judge them against the rest of the grid they’re just beautiful. The way this team has the two best looking drivers and Red is their colour…I’m going to miss Carlos next year.

Max. That smirk is going to haunt me. In there very best way.

[sun-stricken]

Man I am so happy I found your blog. Like it’s so refreshing to see a gray blog about, well, GRAY. Anyways id love to hear some more of your headcanons about gray, maybe ones on his demon slayer traits as well. If that’s ok with of course😅.

if u like my blog u should see my notes app, its almost embarrassing how full of him it is

i struggled with this ngl, single character (even when its ur fav) hc list r weirdly difficult for me

BUT I DID IT SO ENJOY!

Grays has a scarily good memory, he can see something once and be able to recall it in almost perfect detail even years later

amazing for molding, horrible for embarrassing or traumatic memories though

If someone needs something done, they go to him

He has a lot of people that owe him favors on standby, and no he will not say how those favor came to exist

he has a patch of natural white hair in his bangs, he got it from his mothers side

He has a brown cat named Catnip

shes his pride and joy

he has boxes full of letters, notes, and cards people have given him since joining Fairy Tail.

He’s really good at talking himself out of situations, as someone else said, hes a bit of a diplomat

if theres a fight or job that requires no magic hes one of the best for it

Some call it gaslighting, i call it being a lawyer in another life

Grays like, terrifyingly smart, he knows what to say, when to say it, and how

if other guilds/maybe the council did scouting, hes at the top of the list

nobody wants him as an enemy

ESPECIALLY after he got his devil slayer magic

speaking of

devil slayers are the embodiment of cute aggression

he gets the random urge to bite people

theres an 80% chance that he’ll try to head-bunt people now

if he gets too happy he’ll try to throw smth

he has ‘fangs’, really sharp canines and he probably has a self-induced tongue piercing from how many times he bit his tongue from them

the tips of his fingers are black, whether thats a demon slayer trait, or a product of having two ice magics, which makes him work in prime frostbite temperatures, is unknown, they just are

Gray collects siblings the way Natsu collects father figures

He also has a larger male following than Erza, but its okay bc she has a higher female following than him :)

he wears eyeliner. i just. i need to say it.

i want to add smth thats in every fairy tail au i make but never explicitly stated

hes deaf, he was born hoh but its gotten worse over the years, especially after Deloria

he has lacrima hearing aids and will turn them off if someone is being particularly annoying and he just isnt in the mood

he stress cooks and has gotten pretty good at it

he has a recipe book full of Isvan style foods and those are his favorite to make

He realized hes lived in Magnolia longer than he ever lived in Isvan and it tore him apart

When he writes things down, its a mix of Fioren and Islavic/Isvani writing

when he gets tired or really stressed he speaks his native language without realizing

hes a secret theater kid

hes the type to hear a song and lie on the floor for a couple hours

he tries to say he doesnt, but my god does he live off drama

he flirts when hes nervous bc its a very fun image to me

a weird amount of ppl hes dated/friends with were his enemy/rival in a sense

THATS ALL TY FOR THE ASK SORRY ITS KINDA SHORT AND ALL OVER THE PLACE

[spaceagebachelormann]

omg hcs for christine as your gf in a highschool au!!

christine as your gf in a highschool!au

✧ warnings: homophobia

✧ authors note: jas ml ty for requesting this even if u don’t know shit abt phantom of the opera <3 yk i love christine ! also reader is fem cause i said so

✧ m.list — nav.

writing this cause i finished my exam early 😈😈

her favourite classes are the ones she has with u

even if she absolutely sucks at it it’s okay cause she gets to spend it with her favourite girl!!!

or if its a class she likes but ur bad at she’ll tutor u in a heartbeat

typa gf to give u a kiss everytime u get something right

ngl she’d prob be in theatre 😭 so she’d tell u every little detail abt her auditions and what roles she wants

she once got cast as brenda in hairspray when she wanted penny and started genuinely tweaking

she’d get so so happy if u came to her shows

she’s broken character before just to wave at u !!

yes she got in trouble no she didn’t care

also ur probably also friends with raoul cause theyre still friends cause i said so

he’s not a theatre kid but he IS a band kid

he plays trombone btw 💀

christine would prob want u to try out clubs so obv those are ur go to’s cause ur friends are there

she understands if u don’t wanna join a club but she does encourage it

also!! u barely see her during exams cause girlie gets stressed (same)

like to the point she has to sleep during lunch because she barely slept the night before

so like u have to force her to fix her sleep schedule after exams are over

raoul gets so annoyed if y’all start flirting during lunch 😭😭 he’s almost moved tables before

“ew stop nobody wants to see that”

and then he’s ur first defender if someone starts being a bitch

the amount of people he’s gotten suspended, fired, expelled for harassing u guys is actually crazy

no shit gets past him the second he hears abt it they’re cooked

we love a supportive third wheel

also!! she’d get her license as soon as she can so she can pick u up and drive u home <33 literally no other reason

she’d wanna work at the same place as u when y’all get jobs (prob at the food court in the mall) but she refuses certain places

like she’ll work at subway but refuses taco bell?? (raoul would work at taco bell)

and he gets even more annoyed when she comes and visits u at ur job (taco bell 💀)

average white rich man when he has to work at taco bell and his two main friends are dating so he’s a constant third wheel

also every teacher loves christine and will let y’all sit in their classrooms for lunch it u don’t wanna be in the cafeteria

she’d love to buy u things for lunch and if she doesn’t have money that day she just makes u some herself

and let me say her cooking just might be the most amazing thing u ever taste

if u let her know how much u love her cooking she just starts bringing it for u everyday

she gets so offended if u don’t come to school when ur not sick and just cause u felt like it

if ur sick she’ll come by and take care of u (cause u only eat her soup) but not coming just cause u didn’t wanna??? 😒

she won’t rlly do much abt it she’ll just be petty for the rest of the day and then forget abt it the next day

also she loves walking u to ur classes! even if it’s across the school from hers

it’s okay she can run and she’s pretty decent about it cause she doesn’t rlly mind gym

she’ll walk to u class even if a teacher she dislikes is there

and coming to her house after school is the best

she has an insane cd/vinyl collection with every genre ever so she lets u pick some and plays them in the background

makes u play mario kart because she’s weirdly good at it

it’s like a superpower for her

she could start in the back and she’d still be in 1st place throughout the whole game

usually a toadette main but will match with u sometimes (yoshi and birdo, peach and daisy/rosalina, etc)

[fersrsbizniz]

Finally finished Siege of Darkness!

Ngl, I was really worried there that I would be struggling with it for months. But as soon as Drizzt and Catti-Brie claimed friendship it became smooth sailing. For me, that is, the reader. Everyone else had a rough time.

Some highlights:

Really appreciated the Jarlaxle moments—he honestly carried the beginning chapters for me. Thank you, Jarlaxle for your cautious and duplicitous ways (and even some honest ways) for getting me past the Problem™️. I really felt for you when you realized you were in the toils and was glad that got all sorted out.

Guenhwyvar is amazing as always and even though I knew she couldn’t be gone for long I was still worried for her—the permanence of the word choice is what stressed me out. But then the pattern went back into play and I was calm again.

Lloth/Lolth - get your spelling sorted out plz but really it was fun to see the chaos bringer bring, well, chaos. You are an awful deity, keep doing what you do! Positive I know who you just gave to Errtu, though.

Bruenor…just so glad you got to be the one to deliver that blow! Also, so happy he met his ancestor! Finally!

BELWAAAAARRRRRR!!!!! :DDDDDDD

Drizzt used his bracers to do something to his legs, right? Since his arms couldn’t keep up? Idk it’s just the way the story kept mentioning and mentioning that he was weirdly fast that gave me that thought. Either way, ray of sunshine in bad times is here in the form of Drizzt.

Catti-Brie had a lot of cool fights! Especially near the end! She and the sword seem to be getting along. Don’t know how long that will last. But still cool!

Alustriel and the Silverymoon force. I had my qualms before but I like them all now. I feel bad for her…she has the VHD issue of: she was so beautiful! She moved her beautiful hair behind her beautiful ear, and beautiful-ed her way down the stairs beautifully. She is cool. Author needs to chill.

Some I wanted more of:

The Time of Troubles came and went REALLY quickly. I would have loved to spend more time on the houses losing their collective shit because their magic wasn’t working as expected. I really think it would have allowed for some insight on more of the houses.

More Svirfneblin stuff!!! Gimme more Deep Gnome lore :o

More Jarlaxle. Can’t get enough of that guy.

Things I could have done without:

The Relationship™️ which is a little bit of a mood killer since it’s canon (I LOVE both of them—just not with each other)

All of the sexual uncomfortableness with Catti-Brie. She’s a grown woman, yeah, but that was not how to get me to like Wulfgar’s people or his successor at all. And the sword thing? I would have found it more palatable IF it was literally the sword begging to be held and not possessed Catti-Brie. I think it was meant to be awkward, and uncomfortable, but it came off more like author trying to show that Drizzt was such a good guy for not doing her then and there and it was all kinds of unnecessary. (Don’t get me wrong—I enjoy smut, I enjoy a well written relationship…I will whine about this forever)

On the whole, I enjoyed the book. I think I would still place it before The Crystal Shard, but those are my two lowest rated books for the series rn. And I like them. So that’s good, right?

[askanallo]

Hi! I'm asexual and biromantic but for the last few days I've been questioning if my experience of romantic and platonic love isn't atypical as well. I would like to ask you if you can separate platonic and romantic attraction and love, and if the line between them is solid or blurry for you.

Asking because I've always assumed that this is something that is very individual, but lately everyone I've discussed this topic with has told me that the line between those two is pretty solid and clear for them. I have to retrospectively assume that this applies to a few people I've dated as well, because they were all weirdly bummed out when I broke up with them for mental health reasons but wanted us to stay friends.

For info, I don't really see much of a difference between platonic and romantic relationships and love, which is why I don't mind when someone breaks up with me as long as we get to be friends afterwards and as long as I'm allowed to at least hug them (would prefer being able to cuddle because that's how I recharge my energy and hugs usually don't last long enough for me to recharge but I respect that a lot of people don't consider cuddling platonic). I don't really feel a difference in the intensity of my feelings when I start dating a friend (I could never date a stranger. I need to know someone for at least a year to even consider them a friend, after 3 years I might get comfortable with being alone with them in the same place, and only then could I potentially date them.) but from what I've seen the intensity I feel for all my friends is more similar to a typical experience of romantic love? Like I physically ache when they're away and I'm sad when I don't see them for two days or more and I want to be physically close to them. I wouldn't mind kissing most of them but I don't really need it, mostly because I find kissing kinda stressful (I never know if I'm doing it right). The way I describe my relationships is that I just want to be by their side in whatever form they see fit - if they want me to be their partner, so be it, if they want to be friends, that's fine as well, and anything in between works too. My only desire is to be in their life until the end of days, and the only thing that is very hard for me is when someone I consider a friend doesn't consider hugging and cuddling something friends do. As I said, I can do without kissing, but if I had some sort of manual and knew the motions to do it correctly then I'd definitely prefer to kiss most of my friends too.

I can't really tell you whether what you're feeling is atypical - probably less common than feeling a larger separation between platonic and romantic love, but there are a lot of less common experiences of love that are still considered fairly typical, so who knows.

So, for my own personal experience: I definitely feel a pretty big difference between romantic and platonic love. "I don't mind when someone breaks up with me as long as we get to be friends afterwards and as long as I'm allowed to at least hug them" is very unrelatable to me, I definitely need a good amount of time to get over a break-up. So is the not dating a stranger part (dating apps kinda suck, but they aren't that bad for me), or only being comfortable with being alone with someone after three years. That part sounds a bit more like trust issues than anything ngl, but if it works for you, who am I to judge.

The way you're describing platonic love is really quite intense. For me, that would definitely be more romance-aligned. That doesn't mean that it's wrong to feel platonic love that intensely, it's just different from what I feel.

As for kissing - if it feels good, and they aren't wiping their lips right after you kissed them, you're doing it right. Don't worry too much about it. If they continue kissing you and they don't tell you anything, it's really on them if you do it in a way they dislike lol

[pearwaldorf]

20 questions for fic writers

sorta tagged by @antivanruffles

How many works do you have on ao3?

130 excluding the the podfics I'm listed as a co-author on

2. What's your total ao3 word count?

230,000. I'm a very succinct writer!

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Currently OFMD. I have written a lot of (in descending order) Star Wars sequel trilogy, Good Omens, Dragon Age: Inquisition, Critical Role, and MCU.

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

we wore the jacket for the longest time (Star Wars ST, Finn/Poe/Rey, 3200)

well you laughed baby it's okay (it's buzzcut season anyways) (nsfw; Good Omens, Aziraphale/Crowley, 1100)

human sacrifice and mass hysteria (nsfw, DA:I, Cullen/Dorian, 1080) This one has a weirdly long tail. I still get bursts of kudos on it every now and then.

balance theory (The Old Guard, Joe/Nicky foe yay, 660)

taste the stardust in my mouth (Star Wars ST, Finn/Poe/Rey, 560)

5. Do you respond to comments?

I do not. I don't have enough energy to write and respond to comments, so I'm sure people would rather I write. They are all appreciated though <3

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

a knife on the things that held us together for sure. It sets up the rift between Han and Leia after Ben's attack on the Praxeum and it's the last time Leia sees her brother. I was so emotionally wiped by it I couldn't even think about writing for two weeks hahaha

7. What is the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Most of my fics have happy endings, or at least hopeful ones.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

If I do nobody has ever told me.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

I do! I'm not sure what "what kind" means.

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

I've written exactly one, the Will Graham/Aziraphale one (I swear it makes sense in context). ngl it's pretty weird. Plenty of AUs set in different universes though!

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

I have. Somebody plagiarized "but you laughed baby" beat for beat. When I confronted them about it they said they must have subconsciously regurgitated it. Binch, I had to reread my own fic to compare, don't give me that shit. (They deleted their entire account afterwards. I'm not sad.)

12. What's the longest you've spent working on one fic? And the shortest?

Shortest is drabbles, and those take anywhere from 15-30 minutes. Longest? I still have a Mass Effect fic that I've been picking at on and off since 2012. I should just finish it up.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

I have not.

14. What's your all-time favorite ship?

I refuse to pick.

15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

The Good Omens While You Were Sleeping AU is my only actual posted WIP. There are Reasons I tend not to post unfinished stuff.

16. What are your writing strengths?

I'm really good at nailing character voices and dialogue. I think I'm decent at striking a balance between pretty language and making sure it still moves things along. I have been told I'm very good at intimate character interaction.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

What the fuck is a plot?

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

Unless you're going for the half-remembered vocabulary because diaspora kid vibe (which I did in my Shang-Chi fic), get somebody fluent to translate for you. The amount of horrific Spanish I've seen in OFMD fic is... not good.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

X2! I thought I was very clever making puns on "le petit mort" in a Rogue fic

20. Favorite fic you've written?

I have a series! I love the extremely weird ones I wrote just for myself that nobody else seems to like, although the Ed/Blackbeard/Stede one is an exception.

I am where memes go to die, so if you want to do this, consider yourself tagged.

[icebluecyanide]

Alex Rider S03E01 Reaction

So I've already watched all of s3, but I decided for some reason to keep a liveblog & take a moment after every episode to write down my thoughts/predictions/questions at the time. Some of it is very amusingly wrong, but I'm going to share it anyway because I do always enjoy reading liveblogs/reaction posts myself so maybe other people will want to read it too.

Note that while this contains no spoilers for later eps, I have read the book and reference it, so warning for book spoilers and me being unable to stop comparing the two.

Liveblog

Hey I’ve been there! (Malta)

I am petty but I don’t like Alex sharing what Yassen told him with people lol. But I guess they had to make it a group project for the show and it’s not the stuff with his dad which is what Alex in the books felt was too private to share so oh well

Tom and Jerry(/Jay??) ahsdlfhs

Alex thinking Yassen wasn’t lying to him 😭 and he does seem to have kept the part about his dad a secret!

oh damn he wants to destroy Scorpia!! and Kyra also wanting him to, that could cause interesting conflict when he joins them later

also i forgot that Scorpia actually killed Ian in this lol

Kyra is going to do machine learning lol

Love the Alex/Kyra ship fuel with the hurt/comfort scene

ahslfhs how did they even find that villa tho? LIke I thought that was just the piece of wall Mrs Rothman was photographed in front of, surely that gives them no clues about where she’s staying?

And not to be mean but Kyra did kinda bring the stabbing on herself ashdflhs. Going off on her own because she got bored and then expecting Alex to do the fighting and treating the fight weirdly casually

It’s interesting how they seem to have changed Scorpia’s structure/origin story what with Mrs Rothman being elected and there being no client for this operation.

Them referencing Alex getting in with Tom setting fireworks in the books... i mean it's a nice reference but also actually that was more fun than Kyra just being able to hack their way in ngl ahsdlfhs. Not really the show’s fault, but modern tech & computer tricks make spy stories more boring

Also Alex just walked into the party in his suit and honestly this is one of those plots that only works because Otto is not a teenager. If he actually looked like a teen, he would have stood out waaaay too much (which was actually a concern in the book)

Alex grabbing champagne and later putting it back down again haha good way to blend in, I suppose

Getting his phone out?? In the exhibition?? So rude

Love the trend of doctors/scientists in Alex Rider wanting to be paid more for their work. Honestly they deserve it because they won’t even get to publish their extraordinary findings

‘I can hear you breathe’ Love Nile

Nile please how are you surprised at Alex attacking you asdfs

Shame we didn’t get Nile overpowering him like in the books, the difference in their fighting skills was so much bigger there, but I think they made Alex more of a fighter in the show. In the books he mostly needs to rely on the element of surprise and usually when he’s in a fight he’s outmatched and needs to use some form of trickery/his environment to win while show!Alex actually has pretty good fighting skills

I love Nile’s actor but I wish he could have actually taken Alex down like in the book, the way he loses Alex and doesn’t even realise it & thinks he died makes him look a lot less competent tbh

How did Alex climb up there?? And more importantly, how is he getting down haha

I get the feeling Yassen isn't gonna show up until Alex is with Mrs Rothman lol but at least we got to hear his final words ot Alex like four times

Overall

Really exciting, love seeing Malta and I’m intrigued at the differences between the book and the show and where it will lead. 

Thoughts/predictions

I imagine the race Tom’s brother mentioned will play a role and I liked the little bit we got with Tom about his grades being bad and maybe wanting to drop out. I guess Tom’s parents aren’t going through their divorce in the show? Also really enjoyed Alex and Kyra being more invested in the investigation than Tom and how they are apparently planning to take down Scorpia for their families.

I liked how we got to see more from Julia Rothman and Scorpia already and I’m intrigued by what Invisible Sword will be. Love Max having his ‘I have grandkids now’ moment and trying to talk Julia Rothman down and her being like ‘no I want to kill’. Looooved Nile telling Mrs Rothman to shoot him if he ever lost the appetite for killing.

I also really liked Alex talking about his dad and how he had nothing to do with spying and how his world got turned upside down when he learned about his uncle being a spy and now it’s happening again.

Questions

What is Invisible Sword in this?

What’s the deal with Julia inheriting her place at the table? Not sure if I like the new origin story for Scorpia but I’m intrigued by the way they have a council now instead of an executive board and how it changes the vibes.

Are Alex and Tom and Kyra gonna fight?

[chibikittens]

a little sad and frustrated again over HFY. I used to love all these stories, and I’ll admit I haven’t been involved in it lately so I could be completely wrong, but are there any... good stories anymore?

(ngl this is just a vent post about nothing important bc I love to complain, but hey if you have any recommendations... ;_;)

It feels like so many of them steal ideas from one another, and- fine. It IS a fandom, after all. That’s kind of the point. But it seems like so many stories out there are just really wonky (barely there) science facts without any real overarching story. Or stories with interesting ideas but NO drive to explore them. It’s just “woooa humans have this funny organ/bio-chemical and it makes them WAY BETTER than these weak silly aliens who have the personality of a wet napkin haha!” (which is its own problem too ngl)

(and some of them are like, ‘posted 8 hrs ago’ and blatantly rips off a 5m youtube video that just came out about the exact same super niche trivia knowledge... like... cmon)

And then there are the... pro-war, weirdly eugenics-y ones out there that make you raise your brow at the moral. Like all the stories where humans (or whoever) have to prove their personhood, and then... they do. They prove it, as if they needed to in the first place. Or the ones like “fuck with humanity and find out” and then the aliens fuck around and they find out, and there’s SO MANY of those, why are there so many...?

And like I’m not saying there can’t be stories with complex and flawed societies! I’ve read great stories out there like that! It just doesn’t feel like those are being written anymore, and any sense of nuance has been lost, exchanged for this sense of genetic or mental superiority, and it’s so off-putting...

And I think it’s frustrating ‘cause I have read super amazing stories that frankly, baffling that they’re free?? Like, published-book-quality stories I would’ve been glad to pay for.  I remember Prey, an unfinished story where humans were one of two of the only predatory species in the galaxy - and sure, it wasn’t perfect, the enemy was genetically evil. But, as the human race was being shown in its complexities within the story, and their predatory-nature was mostly political and they directly acknowledge the more nuanced hunter-gatherer type of background humanity has had, maybe there would’ve eventually been something like that for the other species too. Sad it ended, but it was showing a lot of promise for unraveling more nuanced ideas along the way.

And then there’s Betty Adam’s short stories! Where, yes, the humans are wacky but their alien counterparts are just as wacky, too! And, not only are the alien cultures unique, but so are the individuals within the cultures as well! And they’re not all just drab fucking dry and salty fucking white-coat scientists! (Just god how much I have come to loath that character sub-type) (I should just be reading those ones honestly, like can I tell you how fucking refreshing it was that, instead of reading another adrenaline-story ((you know the ones they’re ALL the same)) I read a short story where a cleaner wouldn’t start cleaning cause someone moved his favorite broom, and an insectoid person was like ‘what does it matter lol also you have a favorite broom???’)

And then the shorter stories that actually had heart to them, stories that were smaller in scale but just as passionate as the galaxy-wide stories. I remember this one where a man crashes onto a planet, and is rescued by the aliens living there, only they don’t live as long as he does... he ages so slow in comparison that he becomes a sort of living historian/weather predictor for them, and when he finally dies at the end, its like such a profound shift, like this man who has seen generations after generations of this species live and grow and thrive, and he’s just... gone, too. Like everything else that came before.

I dunno. I just needed to vent about it I guess. I miss those stories. Maybe they still exist and I just can’t find them because the sites they’re posted to aren’t really meant for story-archiving and they become buried and lost, but if they’re there then I cannot find them, and I get sad thinking about that too.

[bugeyedfreaks]

“Blossom being boy crazy in the anime is something I can let slide because, like how she reflects how American superheroes act in the OG show, she reflects how a magical girl group leader acts in the anime (she eats a lot, she’s klutzy and gets bad grades, she loves boys… big Usagi Tsukino vibes, lol)”

Never really thought of it that way, ngl thats pretty clever on their part. Though I still don’t really like it, its one of the reason why Z was so hard to watch. Also it speaks volume when I rarely see people criticising about this (maybe i’m late for the whole thing or something) but if it were Kaoru (Buttercup) who was the one boy crazy there be lots of post of how Z is the worst adaptation, but lately its been getting some positivity.

Its sad cause I would’ve love Momoko as her own character but since she has correlation with Blossom its hard separate them, especially when I see fans implementing their Z personalities with their main canon

And that’s the whole entire thing, right? Momoko is technically Blossom, but… not, haha. 😆 PPGZ at least made sure to make it clear that the girls in their show weren’t the girls from the original show (even though people do still conflate the two, weirdly enough!). Like, I have to commend the anime team for at least making the effort, unlike, say, the 2016 reboot squad. One of the things that irritated me about that show was that they never made it clear whether or not they were THE girls, or if they were completely different versions of the girls. …and to be honest, a really good way they could’ve made it clear was if they had just completely recast everybody in the show and not only the girls. They could’ve even made the art style even more different from the original. They could have even taken out callbacks from the original show. Having this in-between of new and old didn’t work, all these weird claims people working on the show publicly made about making the characters “better” didn’t help either… but then again, I don’t know, the reboot was just so poorly written anyway that I’m not sure if any of that would’ve helped with the overall quality. 🤷‍♀️ I guess it being awful kind of helps with avoiding OG character misinterpretation a little (maybe?) because I feel like people just mostly agree that those versions of all three of the girls are… very bad.

[hard-core-super-star]

I see we're in the same boat, I don't know if this is cool or sad. probably sad. NOPE, I said my point remained! It wasn't fair, this win didn't count. I didn't earn that right? how do I earn this then? totally not sounding desperate at all, I'm asking in a normal, controlled tone😶 oh, thank the jury for me because they're so merciful.

nuh-uh hdhwkwkdjsk It would be embarrassing if I said it every time this happened, not that it happens often and...um...uhh... yeaaah, the congratulations we deserve- I can clearly see that we really lost track of the conversations lmao.

why not both? Sitting back and chilling after a long interaction feels rewarding. oh that's actually cool, do they take classes with you? but anyway I can send you a message via pigeon if you want.

I have but since you don't want to know I'm not going to say anything about my boy, not because I talk non-stop about him once I start. Well, I think I can try, I wouldn't want to make you look desperate, but I don't know how I would be a well-behaved person since you want me to finish my sentences 🤨

I saw it and I already talked about it, but I still find myself on the ground, I'm a sucker for angst and it hit me hard. the way you describe feelings and my god, all the affection involved there despite the unpleasant events- Kate, R and Yelena's feelings colliding there I- awhsksks why did you do that???? 😭😭 (look at you, already knowing that I was sleeping, I'm tempted to give you a star)

– 🌟

i'm going to go with cool because i can 🤘 hmm, too late, i already took the win, you can't take it away from me. maybe give me my very deserved wins and you can earn your nickname. mhmm, i can tell how controlled you are. i think they were only merciful because you were tired but we'll have to see, they're easily swayed.

it can't be more embarrassing than all my obvious comments so really, it would only be fair if you shared all those moments with me. it's not like i'm actively encouraging it or trying my best to keep making you smile or anything of that sort. i still think we're doing good despite how chaotic our conversations are.

both does sound good, people are just really annoying, ngl. she's actually a friend from high school who sort of became a younger sister to me so i'm constantly checking on her to see if i can offer some, slightly chaotic, advice. slightly unrelated but i've always loved the idea of sending letters. i know it's a lot of work but idk, it's always sounded cool to me. and it's weirdly a common theme among queer people [mainly emisue but we briefly touched on michelangelo doing this too]

that's definitely not something i would love to hear about, especially because i happen to have two cats that i love more than anything. what if i say being well-behaved equals finishing your sentences? does that change your mind about leaving them unfinished? 👀

you already know i love hearing you talk about my writing so do it as often as you like. i think it's obvious how much i lean toward angst + hurt/comfort. i don't really know why, there's just always so much more to explore than with regular fluff. i absolutely adored writing about all three of them and having them form that support system together. [yeah, it definitely didn't have to do with the fact that you literally told me you were going to go to sleep in that message so you wouldn't have seen my response until you woke up 😶 i'll 119% accept that star though]

[fandomfloozy]

ah, ✨lore✨ btw:

To preface: I adore giving my tieflings mythological demon names, whether they be biblical, Greek furies, or the like. In my DND campaign with my friends, my tiefling wizard is named Leviathan lmao. All of their names have a connection, whether ironic or literal, to their characterization or story-beats. Lmk if you can spot them lol

Abbadon 😇

Class: Arcane Trickster Rogue

Romance: Gale (formerly) / Wyll (formerly)

Campaign (Balanced): Completed

My child. Beby's first durge. Her story made me fall in love with the durge storyline. I did a normal Tav before her, and I've never looked back lol. She's of a kind disposition. She detests her Urge. She wants so badly to be a good person and typically won't take advantage of people. Heart of gold. At the end of the day, romance just wasn't in the books for her with the party. Her closest bond was actually with Jaheira. They have a sort of mother-daughter bond. Redeemed in the end and had a nice lil epilogue for herself.

Megera 🤠

Class: War Domain Cleric of Selune

Romance: Astarion (formerly) / Karlach (currently)

Campaign (Tactician): Act III

Yes, Cleric of Selune lol. Shart is her best friend, weirdly enough. I wanted to try something interesting with her. Kind of meet halfway on the kind/nice standpoint. She's a decent person, even to strangers. but she isn't afraid to throw out a threat or two to do what she needs to. She has a difficult time consolidating her past and present, especially as it relates to her connections to Gortash and Karlach, respectively. I headcanon a former romance with her and Gortash, which makes it a very interesting triangle, given their history with each other.

Lilith 😈

Class: Dual Weapon Fighter / Rogue Assassin

Romance: Astarion (formerly) / Gale (currently)

Campaign (Dishonor): Act II

I essentially think of her as my True Durge™️. It's in a subtle way though. She cares for her companions deeply. She'll protect them and typically won't do anything to outright upset them, but she holds no bars over intimidating people to get what she wants or killing strangers when it's convenient. I'm not done with her run yet, but I see her defeating Orin and becoming Bhaal's Chosen in the end, and ascending Gale as well. Kind of power-hungry ngl lol.

And so those are my triplets! I know they're super similar, that's just my way lol I do what's comfortable and familiar, and I really like the campaign through the eyes of a tiefling durge (that sleeps with Astarion and ultimately dumps him apparently lol)! If you haven't tried these combos, I highly recommend. I love all of my babies and I hope you love them too!

✨They're sisters✨ uwu

(by virtue of being related, they are all unfortunately durging all over the place, no questions at this time)

[all-about-seggs]

If Jujutsu kaisen were to have typical shojo manga troupes/ Cliches-

Warnings- Headcanons about what kind of story would the JJK folks be in if they were in a shojo manga. Shitposting basically. Ngl this is not my best but they've been sitting in the drafts for so long, so i decided to just post them.

______________________________________

Gojo Satoru - Lets say hes not the clan head yet, so its a Contract marriage for him, ya'know the higher ups from his family won't leave him alone, saying he should settle down and though he ignores it at first it gets to a point where he can't get anything done without having his family interfere so he offers an unsuspecting relatively 'normal' girl aka you a tantalizing offer.

It'd start of with that Love- hate relationship with you bc of his inherent personality defects. You had your own reasons to accept his demands bc uhhhhh *insert any reason that works for you pls*

You thought he doesn't take anything seriously until you saw him teaching his students. His methods are far from conventional but it was the most genuine you'd ever seen him be. That was probably a turning point in your previously distorted relationship.

You'd live together, but in seperate rooms. His acting skills during the whole ceremony+ any family visits are top notch tho.

The type who'd annoy you the most but will also secretly help you from behind the shadows without you even knowing.

A little side note. He is the one who falls for you FIRST. But will think up of a way to manipulate you into confessing first and then would never let you live it down, how you were "SO MADLY IN LOVE WITH HIM" or so he says. Pls woop his ass.

Geto Suguru- If we're taking about Geto before going rouge then its, The bodyguard and the threatened girl. It's pretty simple how you two met. He had a mission to help you survive and you fell for his *charms* or his sexy man bun you can choose🤷

Villan! Geto- Since he started as a good guy I'd say his story would be one of those where you'll end up chasing after him even after your contract ended bc you could see the internal conflict he was going through during his teen/ highschool years.

He wouldn't push you away tho. He wants to take you to hell with him if his heaven doesn't come before.

Gonna be toxic af tho. Gaslighting champ will make you his trophy wife and no one will ever know your whereabouts.

Kamo Noritoshi- The rich nobility and the commoner. Let's throw in a little bit of debt on y/n as well shall we.

So, at first he doesn't even spare you a glance but after realizing how your home condition was not something to be taken lightly he felt an odd connection to you, and remembering his mothers words to always help people out he gave you a place to stay and work....in his own mansion, commence the awkward but sweet mutual understanding and pinning between you two.

Aoi Toudo - Bullied girl and the Savior. For the sake of this cliche let's say y/n is a 'big' girl okay (big in what way? you can decide that for yourself reader) so you get bullied for your size/ weight/ stature in general.

One look at your ass and he's already hooked, so he trails after you and eventually sees you getting harrassed by a group of girls and guys.

He was so angry, all the veins of his mascular forearms bulged as he clenched his fists to stop himself from flinging the entire mob of bullies out of the damn window.

He may have held himself back for the sake of not frightening you any further but the intimidating scowl and cusses he threw was enough to make your bullies flee like tiny little flies.

From that day onwards you got yourself a fan and a bodyguard combined. Or maybe even more?

Toge Inumaki- A case of mistaken identity. This may come off as a bad attempt at humor but weirdly enough , Toge was wearing a skirt (maybe he Gojo lured him into doing it or maybe just for funsies) and since he's not able to talk normally either so being the pretty boy he is, you end up mistaking him as a girl.

The second time you met, you saw him enter the mens washroom and you just🧍stood there processing why?

The third time? You had to change cloths and it was crowded everywhere so you just chose an empty class room which was not exactly empty since toge was there. But since you thought he was a she, you just quickly shit the door and off goes the t shirt.

Poor Toge was so confused and flustered, he couldn't speak nor could he look up after getting a peek at your bra. If he wasn't such a gentleman he'd think you were trying to seduce him.

So what happens when you do find out that hes actually a guy?

Cue the mutual blushing and struggling to communicate.

[1kook]

disney+ & bust

this is part of my netflix & chill collection !

summary; There’s a pounding on your door a little past noon, so hard and rough, that you almost think it’s the police finally coming to catch you for all your years of illegally pirating Phineas and Ferb. It’s not. It’s just a really drunk boyfriend wailing for your forgiveness at the door.  warnings; arguments, feelings of insecurity, bit of asshole jk, smut in the forms of degradation, dumbification, choking, fingering, spit kink, self punishment, unprotected but [ passionate ] sex, jk losing his cool, return of mean jk, he is actually an emotional mess in this one wtf miscellaneous; ANGST, anniversaries, the L word😳, app developer kook, rip ‘pretty girl’ </3, we all become phineas and ferb stans word count; 13k !!

notes; me: *writes couple who’s whole arc is being silly* y’all: MAKE THEM SUFFER GIVE US ANGST!! u ask I deliver so now we all suffer 😐 ngl it was hard writing this fic n u might notice there’s some parts that seem weird n that’s bc this was TWO fics w diff wording but I ended up mixing them bc I’m insane. still had a lot of fun! felt like I challenged myself!! not proofread bc when I say we suffer we SUFFER

please let me know what you think!!! a simple ask goes a long way <3

previous part: kissanime & foreplay

Approximately one week after The Bullet Bestie’s rise to prominence, Jungkook grows annoyed with it as his weirdly competitive nature rears its ugly head the more and more orgasms that little vibrator coaxes out of you. It turns on a weird switch in him, something slightly stuck up and snooty that he’ll never admit to out loud but is there nonetheless. By the following Friday, The Bullet Bestie is nestled deep in your garbage can and Jungkook’s back to pleasuring you with his tongue and fingers alone.

He had those moments in him, the ones where he liked to think he was better than any and everyone else, and occasionally they manifested against inanimate objects like a bullet vibrator.

Despite his polite and generally soft exterior, you catch glimpses of that cocky spirit more than anyone else. Over the past year, you’ve come to realize that Jungkook’s personality was like a coin that had been left out in the sun too long. He had this sweet and reserved nature you saw most times, a kindhearted boyfriend who adored you almost as much as you adored him. He was your angel whom you knew had a heart of gold, even if you were slowly bringing out his more childish tendencies. You knew him like the back of your hand, knew what his mom’s favorite color was and how he liked to stack the plates in his cabinet according to size and make. It was a side that was rusted from years of being out in the sun, basking in its adoring warmth, and you loved every inch about it.

And still, there was this other side to him you rarely saw. This cocky asshole who hid beneath the soft smiles and careful hands, making his appearance only through sly smirks and a tongue prodding against the inside of his cheek. He was a braggart, a man who knew his greatness yielded for no one and wanted that fact shoved down everyone’s faces. This Jungkook, this other side that never saw the light of day, was like the Hyde to his Jekyll. An unexpected, almost mean side to him that only dared make his appearance when his exhilaration was at an all-time high. Like when he was fucking you into another dimension, or kicking your ass in Mario Kart, or like now, when he was receiving an award at an annual tech ceremony.

On the eve of your one year anniversary, Jungkook’s company invites him to an awards ceremony for other web and app developers like him. It’s a grand event, filled with all the biggest nerds in the developing industry here to present the baby nerds with awards. Jungkook lies somewhere in the middle of the spectrum, both a seasoned player and a rookie all at once. He spends the night tolling you around in a floor-length gown and fangirling over all the “legends” in the room.

You know next to none of these people and none of their accomplishments but still pretend you respect them to hell and back. By the end of the main dinner, you’re sympathizing with Barbie’s ever-smiling features because your cheeks feel sore.

Towards the end of the night, Jungkook wins that random award— okay, who were you fooling? He wins the Platinum Mobile Standard of Excellence Award, recognizing him for all the hard work you’ve seen him put in this past year. It’s probably the highest recognition he can receive at this point in his career. It was an esteemed award that was bestowed upon only the most innovative developer of the year among tech companies, something Jungkook had briefly mentioned he always wanted. It’s basically the equivalent of placing first place in his field, but given Jungkook’s competitive industry and his young age, you think it’s like telling all these old Facebook lords to suck his big fat cock. (But that was your job when you got home.)

He gives a short little thank you speech, promising to work hard and own up to this title. The people around you are swooning, obviously endeared with his soft puppy dog features and melodic voice. They don’t know him like you do, don’t know that uppity twist to his grin like you do. It doesn’t slip off his face even when he steps down off the stage, arms wide open as he comes barreling towards you. Even with you in his arms, the congratulations that are thrown from every direction ring loudly in his ears and swell that ego of his.

The night goes like that for the most part, Jungkook’s acquaintances approaching him every few minutes to rain down their praises. He goes a little crazy at the open bar after a while, shoving the gold trophy into your arms as his beloved work seniors whisk him off for drinks. You don’t mind because you resigned yourself to a night of playing Jungkook’s perfectly perfect partner anyway, watching him politely mingling with his coworkers. Despite his earlier success, you know he won’t brag about it verbally. No, he’ll wait until the two of you get home—your place or his—and remind you how amazing he is with a quick snap of his hips.

As you said, he’ll never boast aloud.

However, that doesn’t mean you won’t.

“That’s my boyfriend,” you explain to the seventh person that greets you that night, excitedly pointing to where said boyfriend was slowly losing all sense of self by the bar. You don’t know anyone here beside Jungkook, and you’re pretty sure no one in their hammered minds is going to remember who you are anyway, so a little gloating never hurt anyone. “He won the ‘I’m Better Than Everyone Else’ award tonight,” you emphasize to the tipsy woman beside you who only laughs at your exaggeration. You assume she’s like you, accompanying one of the many developers here, because as soon as you finish boasting about Jungkook she moves to brag about someone too.

Truth be told, you spend the whole night re-analyzing the Zootopia movie you saw on Disney+ the other night in your head. So if the little fox fellow didn’t control himself would the city have fallen to ruins? Why was the useless sheep girl so evil and bitter? Why was there an unreal amount of romantic tension between the fox and the rabbit? Whatever, you’ll have to rewatch it some other night, and with your new Disney+ account, you could watch it anywhere you wanted to.

Now, you had never bothered to purchase a Disney+ subscription or even tried to swindle Jungkook for his password before. As far as you know, Disney+ was filled with old tv shows from your childhood, sitcoms that made you laugh when you were ten. There’s nothing wrong with that, but personally, you were a firm believer that that which was perfect should not be touched once finished; in other words, you were utterly terrified you’d rewatch an old episode of The Wizards of Waverly Place, only to find out the same joke you’ve been regurgitating for the past ten years doesn’t actually go that way.

However, the harsh reality was that Disney+ was good for a few things. Ugh, you hate when giant corporations provide decent services. Aside from Zootopia, you’ve watched about every animated media on there as well, all of which you replay in your mind as Jungkook has the time of his life with these nerds, knocking back champagne glass after champagne glass.

Anyway, the night ends a little past midnight, and Jungkook who is buzzed on alcohol and high on exhilaration ends up calling an Uber for the two of you. Your apartment— the new one he had not only helped you hunt for but also helped you move into, greatly cutting the cost of movers out with those glistening biceps and thick thighs —is still going through her rebellious phase where the potted plants are trying to take over, courtesy of Kim Namjoon. So for now, there’s a potted plant in an awkward corner that both of you stub your toe against on your way to your bedroom.

You’re thinking Jungkook is going to go to town tonight, given the fact he’s on Cloud 9 and has had his ego stroked by a bunch of dudes for the past couple hours. Maybe you guys can try out the hot role-playing scenario you saw on GirlsWay a few weeks ago, or the handcuffs you impulsively bought from Amazon one Monday night. Or maybe, and this one really makes you flutter, he’ll let you fully take the reins for once.

All those lewd fantasies end up being for naught because just as you shimmy out of your gown (with the help of his hands, of course) and turn to climb him like a tree, he’s on the other side of the room getting your makeup remover out for you. And also talking. A lot. And way more than usual.

“Did you see him, babe?” he sighs, dare you to say, dreamily, handing you the cotton pads as he begins pulling a million pins out of your hair. Slowly and with a lot of confusion, you pull your fake lashes off and begin cleaning your face. “He was amazing.”

“Uh-huh,” you say, having absolutely no idea who ‘he’ is or why Jungkook is so in love with him and not you at this very moment. “But so were you,” you add. Perfect. Stroke his ego and then stroke his cock.

Jungkook sputters at your praise. He’s carefully placing your hairpins on your thigh, cheeks flaming red every time he leans over you. “Was I?” he murmurs, voice sweet in that cute little way it always gets when he’s downed one too many shots of whiskey, enough to be buzzed but not enough to be wasted.

You turn and the pins clatter to the floor and across the bedsheets. “Yes,” you confirm, ignoring his sad huff at the mess you’ve made. Instead, you grab him by the collar of that pink button-up he taunted you with all night. “You were fucking incredible and I think incredible men deserve to have their dick sucked.”

Jungkook laughs at your vulgar statement, holding you gently by the hips as you climb into his lap. “Is that so?” The soft, shy persona is gone now, replaced by the gentle stirring beneath his dress pants. You nod hurriedly, plopping down on his lap and running your hands through his styled hair.

“Yes,” you confirm, kissing the corner of his mouth. “Luckily for you, I know this nymphomaniac who would gladly gobble up your cock at your every command.”

He snorts just as you push him into his back, nose adorably scrunched up. “First of all, you know I hate that word,” he chuckles, finally gracing you with a sweet peck that only makes you want him to fuck you into the fifth dimension. “Secondly, please don’t ever say you’ll gobble my cock up ever again.”

Something inside of you squeals with excitement as he rolls the two of you over, firm body pressing down on yours. “Oh, baby,” you groan, lazily throwing a leg over his hip. Jungkook grins and then decides to entertain you for a few minutes with a sloppy kiss.

You say a few minutes because just as things are heating up, he pulls away. He smiles apologetically. “As much as I’d love to be here with you, I actually have an early morning tomorrow.”

You frown at the sudden change in events. “Huh? They’re gonna make you work the morning after a Gatsby party?” you gasp, sitting up as he gets off of you. With every step he takes away from the bed your heart breaks a little more. “They can’t do that— that’s illegal!”

From the doorway he levels you with a comically raised brow. “No, it’s not.”

You scamper after him down the hall, watch the muscles in his back flex as he pulls his suit jacket on. “You can’t work on our anniversary— that’s illegal!” you offer instead.

He stops at your front door, feet squeezed back into his shoes. “Baby, it’s not,” he rolls his eyes, leaning down to peck your forehead. “It was either I work in the morning or work at night,” he explains, giving your messy hair a soothing caress. He’s looking at you with those eyes, the ones that make your heart lodge itself into your throat and make life a tightrope experience. There’s a devastatingly lovesick part of you that wants this moment, this kind face, to be engraved into your mind for the rest of your life. You want this to be the first and last thought you have and nothing else: just Jungkook’s adoring gaze on you for the rest of time.

The moment ends too soon when he flutters one last peck against your lips. “I’ll be done in the afternoon, okay?”

You pout. “Okay, your place?” you huff, making sure to get one last octopus squeeze around his waist. He nods. “Promise you won’t be late?”

The corners of his gaze soften. “You know I won’t,” he smiles, leaning down to bump your noses together playfully. “Can’t stay away from my pretty girl too long. Besides, I have a gift for you tomorrow.”

It’s with that sentiment and a hammering heart that you let him go. With Jungkook gone, there’s really nothing for you to do now. You took the next two days off in preparation for your anniversary sex, so you don’t have to head to sleep early like usual.

With nothing else planned, you decide on rewatching that Zootopia movie that had plagued you all night, ready to dissect every plot hole to hell and back. You don’t think Jungkook’s seen this movie yet so you add it to your long list of animated movies you’re forcing him to watch.

Part of you is actually really surprised Jungkook left. Well, kinda sorta, very, but not really. Jungkook was a good boy, that much was obvious. He took his job seriously, and if his job wanted him to come in at the asscrack of dawn, then he’d come in before the sun even rose. He was a goody-two-shoes, but even so, you were occasionally able to bring out that darker side in him.

Jungkook working, like actually working in an office setting, was pretty rare though. The dude had a chill job that let him stay home most of the time, and essentially clock in whenever he wanted. Every now and then you were able to convince him to stay, tucking him beneath your body or the covers, depending on the night, and refusing to let him go the morning after.

Once he had eaten you out until the wee hours of the day, ravenous between your thighs, and then went to work the next morning like he hadn’t broken you. Another time you had persuaded him into watching every season of the 2017 DuckTales reboot through the night. When the alarm had rung in the middle of the season finale, he had simply gotten into your shower and gone off to work.

So maybe you were a little confident in your skills, and Jungkook slipping between your fingers tonight was a huge bummer. But there was no use crying over spilled milk, you tell yourself, flinging your bra off somewhere in the corner as you snuggle back into your sheets. You’re ready to tear this Zootopia movie apart, scene by scene.

Even though your apartment is a little cold, you’re comforted by the fact Jungkook will be here to keep you warm all day tomorrow.

All men do is lie.

Despite his promise to come home early the next day, Jungkook ends up lying. The meeting he had been in all morning— the same one that had stopped you from getting bent like a pretzel the night before —drags on well past noon. Then, Kim Namjoon, AKA Jungkook’s favorite senpai in the entire world, catches wind of Jungkook’s success last night and absolutely has to take him out to lunch to celebrate.

You scoff, glaring down at your phone and the impulsive messages you’d sent out an hour ago when Jungkook had first texted you telling you he would be late.

You whirl around to stomp off in the direction of his living room, where all of yours and Jungkook’s favorite foods were growing colder by the minute. You had spent the longest time carefully laying them out, making sure the fried chicken was closer than the pizza but not closer than the breadsticks. Truthfully it’s a nightmare. There are about eight stomach aches worth of food sitting on his coffee table, the greasy stench makes you gag and will certainly stick to your hair for weeks, but none of that mattered because it was all for your beau.

Your very late beau who was making you grow more and more agitated with each minute that passed. Ugh! How inconsiderate of him to test your patience on a day like this. You didn’t want to be upset with him, but this was your first, real milestone as a couple with him. You had wanted to spend the whole day cuddled up, maybe finally tell him how much he really meant to you— definitely not waking up alone with eyeliner crusted eyes and an aching heart.

Deciding you’re being a little too dramatic, you head into the bedroom to calm down. This was fine, you tell yourself, carefully laying out the damn near harlotrous lingerie you had yet to put on. Jungkook would come over soon and everything would be A-okay.

Except for the part it’s actually F-not okay because soon it’s nearing sunset and the food has gone cold so you’ve stocked it into the fridge, and the pretty sheer bra has a wonky wire that’s two seconds away from piercing through your heart, but that doesn’t even matter because Jungkook being late for your all-day anniversary celebration has already ripped it to shreds anyway.  

You plop down on the couch in defeat, impulsively opening up the Disney+ app to cry through another episode of Phineas and Ferb. You’ve abandoned the satin robe that came with the lingerie in favor of donning a big t-shirt that smells like him and makes your heart hurt even more. The setting sun paints the living room in muted oranges, the chirping of birds outside the soundtrack to your lonely day.

You end up watching some other cartoon on Disney+, avoiding the Marvel section because you had promised Jungkook he could be there when you lost your Marvel virginity. Well, at least one of you was good at keeping promises, you think bitterly. For a second, you think about randomly watching one of the infamous MCU films out of order just to spite him. But then you think of that soft puppy gaze and how disappointed he’d be in you.

Whatever! It wouldn’t ever match up to the way you felt now.

Anyway, you circle back. When you’re five episodes into Phineas and Ferb you hear the doorknob rattle.

You sit up just as the door swings open, visible from your spot on the couch. He meets your gaze almost immediately, big doe eyes caught in the act. What act? You’re not really sure. In fact, you don’t even know what you’re looking at when he walks in because he’s drowning in shopping bags. His lips twist into a grin. “Honey, I’m home,” he says playfully.

You don’t laugh.

Jungkook frowns, dumping all his bags down at the entrance before waddling over towards you. “Hey, what’s wrong?” he asks, coming to stand before you and cupping your face in his hands. He’s towering over you, so tall and gorgeous but for the first time, you’re not dazed by his beauty.

“Kook, you said you’d be back hours ago,” you say slowly, avoiding his gaze. You try to keep the frustration out of your voice, but you’ve had hours to dwell on it now, and those annoying cartoon characters, though charming at first, had only served to multiply your annoyance.  

Jungkook blinks, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. “I mean… yeah. But I got you presents?” he beams, glancing back at the mountainous pile he made by the door. You look over too. There are some luxury bags squeezed in between other shops you like, the occasional jewelers' logo on the side.

You stand with a sigh, sauntering off into the kitchen with him on your tail. “I don’t want presents,” you mumble, reaching to pour yourself a glass of water. You’re briefly aware of how childish you must seem. Jungkook hovers behind you.

“What? Yes, you do,” he says. “You had an entire wishlist on my Amazon of things you wanted.” It’s his turn to level you with an unreadable expression, slowly crossing his arms over his chest.

Your frown only deepens as you turn to match his stance against the counter. While it may be true that you did indeed have an entire list of impulsive items on his Amazon, that didn’t necessarily mean you wanted them all. Sometimes you just wanted to stare longingly at a pair of satin gloves without actually buying them. You don’t know how to explain this much to him. “They’re not…” you stop with another deep breath. “Forget it. Thank you for the presents.”

Now it’s Jungkook’s turn to question you. “What,” he says in an unimpressed tone, padding over to you before you can escape back into the living room to watch the entire princess movie collection on Disney+. “No, tell me what’s wrong.”

For some reason, that’s exactly what you don’t want to hear. “Jungkook,” you say flatly, narrowing your eyes at him. “You come home six hours after you said you would without telling me why, and normally I wouldn’t care, but today was supposed to be a special day for us.”

Jungkook reels at your bluntness. “Babe, I was out getting stuff for you. I know it’s our anniversary— that’s why I wanted to treat you,” he responds, oddly condescendingly like you’re a child who doesn’t understand what exactly he was doing.

You brush his hands away from your shoulders. “Yeah,” you huff. “Now I know that. But I spent all day waiting for you,” you stress, chest puffing as you grow more and more agitated by his inability to understand you. God, can he let you go now? At least a bunch of animated, geometrically drawn cartoons won’t question you like this and make you feel as childish as he was.

When he doesn’t say anything else you stomp back into the living room, snatching up your phone from its forgotten spot against the couch. “I’m going to bed.”

At that Jungkook seems to kickstart back to life. “What? ___, it’s barely six,” he says as he follows after you into your bedroom. You ignore him, shuffling beneath the covers. In all actuality, you’re going to bed to mope and watch more animated family shows, maybe cry under the guise of the plot just being so sad. Jungkook sits beside you just as you click back on to finish off your episode. “Baby, I don’t get it,” he sighs. “You’re always talking about how much you want this or that, and I go out and get you it all but now you’re mad?”

You bite down on your lip, eyes lasered in on the pictures moving before you. “Jungkook, just forget it.”

“No,” he says, more sternly than he’s ever been with you before. “If there’s a problem, tell me.” There’s a heavy pause, and then he says, “don’t make me waste my time guessing what’s wrong, okay?” 

“Waste your time?” you scoff, sitting up with pinched brows that you find match his. “I’m not trying to waste anyone’s time— in fact, that’s hot coming from you, Jungkook.”

He rolls his eyes. “What are you even saying? You’re mad because I took a little long getting presents, for you, might I add,” he huffs, plopping down on the edge of the mattress beside your knee. “You’re always saying you want this and that, but you can’t handle me going out to get those things? Do you hear how weird you sound?”

You whip the covers off of you. “Me talking about things doesn’t always mean I want them,” you defend.

Jungkook snorts. “Yes, it does,” he says. “Anytime you ramble about stuff for minutes like a little kid it’s because you want me to buy it for you.”

You blink. “Like a little kid?” you repeat, stunned by his comparison. Granted, you always knew you were the more childish of the two, but you never thought that would equate Jungkook thinking of you as a child. Something red and nasty flares in your chest. “Well sorry,” you spit, crossing your arms over your chest defensively, “sorry we all can’t be perfectly mature golden boys who would never see the light of day if I constantly wasn’t dragging them out.” You know it’s a somewhat low blow, especially because Jungkook’s told you before how his introverted tendencies were a sensitive issue growing up, but you can’t help it.

Jungkook groans, dropping his head into his hands. “Baby, don’t do this now,” he warns, digging the heels of his palms into his eyes. “Stop acting like this.”

“Like how?” you spit, “like a kid?” Jungkook says nothing, leveling you with a blank stare from the corner of his eye. You roll your eyes, phone falling off your lap. Another episode of Phineas and Ferb had started, the corny opening tune filling the space between the two of you. “At least now I know what you think of me,” you mutter over the guitar riff.

“Oh my god,” Jungkook blurts, sitting up wildly. “Of course I’m gonna think of you as a stupid little kid, look at you,” he seethes, gesturing at the phone beside you. You flinch. “All you do is watch kids shows and whine whenever I wanna watch anything normal adults watch. You complain every single day about the most normal things, like your job? Why should I fucking care that you’re working a dead-end office job in a field you didn’t even study for— that’s not my problem, __!” he snaps, eyes narrowed into little slits. “I just won an award last night,” he says suddenly, voice back to its regular volume. “I’m at the height of my career and I’m only going up, but I can’t even enjoy that because I have to come home and cater to you,” he finishes, a loud scoff punctuating the final word.

You had never imagined Jungkook finally bragging about himself would be at your expense.

A beat of silence passes, the angry glint in his eyes quickly fading away the longer you don’t say anything. You sniff once, turning your head idly to the side where Phineas and Ferb is still blaring loudly from your phone speaker. Picking up the device, you throw it across the room where it hits his closet door with a terrifying bang the breaks the silence.

The sound snaps Jungkook out of whatever shock he’d been in. “Baby…” he says slowly, carefully, like you’re a caged animal that’s just escaped the zoo.

“I’m going home,” you say, also a little too calmly. You saunter over towards his closet where your shattered phone screen glares up at you as you yank a pair of sweats off a hanger. Jungkook is still frozen on the edge of the bed, watching you with wide eyes as you move about the room.

It’s when you’re in the hallway leading downstairs that Jungkook finally snaps out of his daze, scampering behind you as you descend the stairs. “Baby,” he rushes out, loudly bounding down after you, “___, wait,” he gasps, catching you by the kitchen counter collecting your keys. “I-I didn't mean that,” he rushes out, eyes wide and frantic as they flicker over your expression. “I don’t think that—I don’t, baby, please, just… let me explain, please.”

“Jungkook, let go of me,” you respond, shaking your wrist in an attempt to release yourself. He’s not even holding you tightly— he never would—but the sound of your heart pounding in your ears makes your movements jerky and erratic. “I wanna go home.”

“No,” he chokes, cornering you against the counter. “No, baby, please just listen to me, I-I—“

“You what, Jungkook?” you snap, placing a hand on his chest and forcefully pushing him away. He lets you, stepping back with a wobbly bottom lip. “You need to tell me how you’re too good for me? How much I hold you down because I wasn’t lucky enough to get a job like yours straight out of college?” He says nothing, swallowing roughly as you jab a finger into his chest. “Well let me tell you something,” you snarl, chest heaving, “I may be childish and a huge complainer, but I’m not stupid enough to let someone walk all over me like this.”

With that, you make your great escape. Truthfully, you don’t want him to see the tears in your eyes as you yank his door open, stomping down his steps and in the direction of the nearest bus stop. The door opens right after you tug it shut, painting your shadow across the sidewalk. There’s the scrambled sound of house slippers against the concrete that follows you down. “Go the fuck back inside,” you snap without missing a beat.

Sensing your obvious anger, he pauses before he can reach you. “Text me when you get home?” he calls out quietly.

“No,” you respond.

You would never admit to anyone that you spend the entire night eating a tub of mint chocolate ice cream. It’s disgusting and makes you gag, but it’s the only one you have in your apartment. And of course, it was brought over by none other than Jeon Jungkook himself a few days ago. Even when you’re trying to comfort yourself over how mean he was, on your anniversary night no less, you’re plagued by thoughts of him everywhere.

As much as you want to brush his words off, put on that cool girl exterior you’ve maintained since high school, there’s something different about this situation. You guess it’s impossible to brush off such hateful words when they come from someone you love and adore so much.

Were you too childish? You had always believed that side of you was what made your relationship with Jungkook so perfect. The two of you meshed well because of your differences, like yin and yang. So how had he been able to so easily deconstruct every inch of that balance in a matter of a few seconds? Was this perfect reality all in your head this whole time?

You want to tell yourself it was just a heat of the moment outburst from Jungkook, give him the benefit of the doubt because he’s never snapped at you like this before. Of course you’ve fought a couple of times in the past year, but neither of you had ever stooped as low as you did yesterday. Furthermore, the insecure part of your brain says he obviously felt this somewhere in his heart to bring it up at all. What he had said to you wasn’t something someone could make up on the spot.

You don’t text him when you get home, partly to spite him, but mainly because you had left your phone at his place anyway. You know he tried calling you last night because the call log is synced up to your laptop. He called on and off for about thirty minutes before he probably found your phone in his room. Whatever, he can mope in his regret for all you care

—is what you wanna say, but the longer he goes without showing himself to you the more your insecurities and hurt fester. Was this it? Was this the end of what was probably the best year of your life? It’s too painful to think about, to even consider the possibility that Jungkook might have gained a new insight last night and decided, hey, maybe this is for the best after all.

You drown yourself in an ungodly amount of sugar for breakfast, your laptop blaring yet another episode of Phineas and Ferb on the dining table. Muscle memory has you making Jungkook’s favorite pancakes before you can stop yourself, and by the time you do realize, you’ve resigned yourself to the blueberry smell anyway.

There’s a pounding on your door a little past noon, so hard and rough, that you almost think it’s the police finally coming to catch you for all your years of illegally pirating Phineas and Ferb.

It’s not.

It’s just a really drunk boyfriend wailing for your forgiveness at the door. You open the door with a fright, jumping back when he slumps forward and almost crashes face-first into the floor. “You didn’t call,” Jungkook cries, leaning a little too much of his weight onto you when you reach out to steady him.

The thundering of your heart slows upon registering it’s him. “Kook?” you frown, nose pinched at the ungodly stench of alcohol wafting off his clothes. “Have you been drinking?” you ask even though the answer is staring you right in the face (and in the nose).

He groans, staggering deeper into your arms. You blindly push the door shut behind him, resigning yourself to this new situation while your pancakes grow cold in the other room. “Baaaby,” he slurs, letting you guide him into the living space. He’s unceremoniously dumped onto the couch, half-opened eyes gazing up at you. “Let me,” a hiccup, “explain.”

You won’t lie. There’s a very obvious sense of discomfort sitting in your chest, torn between two paths that you don’t wish to choose between. His skin is warm and flushed like he’s just walked all the way here in this morning sun. You step over to the window that faces down onto the street below. There’s no sign of his car; you would have killed him if he ever tried to drive in this state.

“Did you walk here?” you ask instead, deciding there’s no need for one singular path, not when you can walk straight down the middle, both cleaning him and grilling him at the same time.

Jungkook’s response is delayed, head lolling from side to side as you help him out of his sweater. His skin is sweaty beneath, scorching to the touch. “Uh-huh,” he groans. Jesus, you sort of assumed but him confirming it really set things into perspective.

By no means did you and Jungkook live on opposite ends of the earth. On a good day, a drive from your place to his took about ten minutes. But walking? Easily an hour. Had he walked all the way from his place, drunk on top of that?

You brush his hair away from his face, his eyes fluttering shut at your touch. His lips are pouty yet chapped, dehydrated from the sun and the alcohol he reeks of. “Sit up for me,” you instruct, scampering off to your room for chapstick and water.

“Anything for you,” Jungkook wheezes, throat probably dryer than a desert. When you return, he’s two seconds from face planting into the coffee table and breaking that pretty face of his. You catch him with a hand on his shoulder, keeping him balanced. “Tell me what to do,” he chokes out, voice hoarse.

“Just need you to drink some water,” you say, pressing a cup against his lips. He drinks it, but a drop still dribbles down his chin.

“No,” he groans, catching your wrist in his hand when you reach up to apply some chapstick on him. “Tell me what to do,” he stresses, “to fix this. Fix us.”

His words make you pause, the tube of chapstick hovering over his plush lips. “You don’t have to do anything,” you respond quietly, trying to finish the application so you can pull away.

Jungkook doesn’t let you go. You try to look away, but there’s something about him that looks off. Maybe it’s the raw skin under his eyes, red and swollen. Or the sad droop to those same eyes that hold you captive. Or maybe it’s the subtle tremble in his hands, the fingers that hold tightly to your wrist, not to keep you there but to ground himself. “I don’t wanna lose you,” he rasps out, shakily bringing your hand to his mouth, where he presses one airy kiss to your knuckles. “Tell me ho-how to fix this and I’ll do it,” he pleads, a vulnerable look in his eyes.

Unable to withstand the sheer amount of agony on his expression, you look away. “___, please,” he chokes out, stumbling off the couch in his drunk and desperate haze until he’s kneeling in front of you. “I can’t… I can’t,” he sniffles, tears clouding those pretty eyes you’ve come to love so much. “I don’t know who I am without you.”

You clench your jaw. “You’re Jeon Jungkook,” you murmur, slipping your hand out of his hold to run through his hair. It’s knotted and a little too greasy, two things Jungkook would usually never allow. “This year’s Platinum Mobile Standard of Excellence Award recipient,” you remind him, trailing your thumb across his cheekbone when he turns to look up at you with those big Bambi eyes. “Sweet and shy, but you love being rowdy with your friends. You love movies and TV and organizing your shirts according to fabric type. You work harder than anyone I know and never complain. You date me, even though I’m a huge child,” you smile sadly.

“No!” he jumps, turning that frantic stare back into you. “Y-You’re not— it’s not,” he stammers, words still slurring together. “I’m a liar,” he cries, resting his forehead on your knees. His shoulders shake. “I don’t deserve you,” he weeps quietly. You place a hand on his shoulder. “Y-Y-You make my life so much better, ___, so colorful and fun. I-I wish I knew you in high school,” he admits, “maybe I wouldn’t have been so emotionally constipated now.”

“You’re not,” you reassure him softly.

He disagrees. “You bring out the best,” he hiccups, “the best in me.” Your heart skips in your chest. “I-I love you, you know that?”

You sputter, eyes wide at his sudden confession. “I… love you so much, y’know? I think about you ev-every night, ___,” he rambles, eyes dreamily gazing off into some miscellaneous spot on the wall behind you. “I can’t get you out of my head. Like you're a song, o-on repeat but it’s not annoying because it’s my favorite song, and I could listen to it for the rest of my life, y’know? My favorite song, I know all the words b-because it’s all I think about! I love... My love… I love you so much.”

“Kook,” you rush out, cheeks flaming as you try to pull him away from where he’s slumped over your legs. His passionate speech has you abuzz, body tingling everywhere until you feel overwhelmed, head spinning like you’re on a rollercoaster. “Let’s get you to bed.”

He nods sleepily, seemingly coming down from whatever alcohol induced rampage has allowed him to walk for an hour straight in this searing heat just to confess to you. “Y-You don’t have to say it back,” he continues to stutter as you guide him through the living room on wobbly legs. “I just-I just— can I?” he babbles. “Can I love you, ___?”

You pass through the kitchen space, where whatever you were watching on Disney+ is blaring loudly. It distracts Jungkook for about two seconds before his attention returns to you. When you don’t answer, he presses on. “Is that okay?” he asks, whirling around to face you, catching your shoulders in his hands. He towers over you by the entrance to your bedroom, dark curls tickling your forehead. His eyes are dark and glazed over, both in tears and an emotion so raw and unfiltered it squeezes around your chest until you can’t breathe. “Is it okay for me to love you?” he murmurs softly, knocking his nose against yours.

Your cheeks blaze. “Yes, th-that’s fine, Kook,” you blubber, placing a hand over his chest, where his heart is also hammering away. “Just need you to go rest now, okay?”

He nods sleepily, nudging your nose with his one last time, like a soft almost-kiss, before letting you push him into the room. “Yes, yes,” he breathes, his body finally crashing from his adrenaline spike. He flops down onto the bed unceremoniously, dark waves fanning across your pillows. You try to wiggle him out of his shirt, but it only gets about halfway up his chest before he blindly reaches for the covers. His legs stick out awkwardly, clad in the sweatpants you’ve come to associate with him.

When he’s all swaddled up in your blanket he finally goes limp, tiny snores leaving his lips as he dozes away from reality. You sigh, pressing a palm to his forehead. He’s still warm and clammy, but at this point, there’s nothing you can do but wait for him to sober up.

With a final kiss to his forehead, you leave the room, closing the door behind you before sliding against the wooden surface. There’s a trapped bird in your chest, wildly flapping its wings in an effort to get out, and it’s all stupid Jungkook’s fault in the next room. Stupid Jungkook who demolished and remodeled your heart all in less than twenty-four hours. It doesn’t calm down, even when you rush off into the kitchen for a glass of water, or when you try to immerse yourself in some other show on Disney+. It stays beating against your ribs and your chest until you’re forcing yourself to sit down on the couch and process.

He wakes up a little before dinner. You hear him from the living room, where you’re flicking through the options on Disney+ for the nth time that day. You’ve seen the first fifteen minutes of about twenty different series and movies by now, always growing antsy and abandoning them early on. The only reason you know he’s awake is because the shower turns on for a few minutes, and then his bare feet are heard padding across the hallway back into your room.

By the time he resurfaces in the living room, you’ve resigned yourself to just more Phineas and Ferb, nonchalantly watching the silly cartoon. (Except you’re anything but nonchalant, and your heartbeat rings in your ears.)

Jungkook hovers by the door, clad in a pair of shorts he’s left here before, and a t-shirt you stole from him. “Hey,” he says quietly, lingering by the doorframe. You nod back in response. “Can I watch with you?” Again, another nod.  

Slinking over to the couch, he’s rather careful as he sits down, leaving a few inches of space between the two of you. You don’t even think he can see the screen of your laptop until he murmurs, “he’s my favorite character,” when Perry the Platypus appears on the screen.

You hum. “Thought you didn’t like these kids shows?” you ask. You don’t mean it to sound as petty and backhanded as it comes out, but that’s really no one's fault but his own.

Jungkook’s breathing tightens beside you. “No,” he admits, “I don’t. Only watch them because I know you like them.” You contemplate pausing the episode and engaging in a real conversation with him, but at this point, you’re very tired from the events of the last day. Jungkook doesn’t press either, just shuffles more comfortably beside you.

You get about five minutes in, quiet chuckles shared between the two of you, before he strikes. “I’m sorry about yesterday,” he says, so hushed you almost don’t hear it. His hand is resting in the space between you, pinky brushing against yours. “About… being late. And the presents.”

You inspire slowly. “That wasn't even the problem, silly,��� you brush off. From your peripheral, you see Jungkook’s slow nod. “I didn’t want any presents,” you mention, “I just wanted you.” You look away from the screen immediately after, pretending like the spot on the ceiling is actually really interesting.

The two of you fall into silence, the animated characters on your screen rapidly chattering away. “Oh,” Jungkook says after a moment.

You roll your eyes. They’re moist but you don’t want him to see. “Yeah, oh,” you parrot back softly, relaxing into the couch again. “Did you eat the food I left out?”

Jungkook shuffles beside you, the soft lull of the speakers soon being cut as he reaches over to pause Phineas and Ferb. A couple of seconds pass and then he’s leaning into you, head resting on your shoulder. “I’m sorry,” he apologizes again, placing a palm over the hand he had been teasing for the past few minutes. “I thought I knew what I was doing but I was wrong.”

His voice is so soft and sincere, it makes your chest ache. You try to burrow your face against your opposite shoulder, try to hide the stray tear that escapes out of the corner of your eye. “It’s fine,” you brush off, voice choked off and hoarse.

Jungkook leans up, pecks your cheek so tenderly it makes you go mushy. “No, it’s not fine. I acted like a know-it-all and said something way out of line,” he murmurs, raising his head to look at you. His hand feels warm over yours. It’s the touch you craved all day and yesterday, the warm feel of his body against yours. You’re embarrassed at how easily you melt into it. “You’re the best thing that has happened to me in a long time,” he tells you, holding your hand close to his chest. “I had no right to say those things to you.”

You sniffle, resting your head against his shoulder now. His heart beats loud enough for you to hear. “Was it true?” you mumble. “Do you really think of me like that?”

He shakes his head, his soft breaths fanning across your forehead. “No, never,” he answers. “I think you’re incredible. My brain was just trying to justify my dumb anger.”

You nod, even if you don’t believe it just yet. But that was a conversation for later, you suppose, sometime in the future when you aren’t on the verge of tears and threatening to crumble apart at the simplest word that leaves his mouth.

“I should have come home like you wanted, thought about my words before saying them,” he says, snuggling closer to you. “I’m sorry.”

“Stop,” you sniffle, covering your face with your free hand as he presses a kiss to the vein that runs over the back of the hand he’s holding captive. “Now it just sounds like I'm just being inconsiderate of your gifts and a crybaby.”

Jungkook kisses your temple softly, gently. “Don’t think about the gifts,” he says. “Just tell me what you wanted to do, doll.”

His voice calms you, has you like putty in his arms. “Watch movies,” you mumble, toying with a thread on your couch cushion. “Be with you.”

He hums. “Then we’ll do that,” he says, reaching for your laptop again. The screen nearly blinds you when it flickers back to life before you, Jungkook’s low breaths against your ear making it near impossible for you to process the titles on the screen. “You liked Disney+?”

Belatedly, you nod. “I like the animated movies,” you admit quietly, the anxieties of before slowly melting away, even more so when he slides his arm around you, pulling you close against his chest.

Unlike other times where he’ll critique the hell out of such childish films, Jungkook says nothing as he starts up the Zootopia movie instead, the same one you had wanted to show him before, right from the beginning. “That bunny looks like you,” you murmur when Judy Hopps first appears on the screen.

Jungkook snorts. “You say that about every cartoon bunny.”

You turn your head to glance at him over your shoulder. He meets your gaze with a small smile you return. “It’s because you’re so cute,” you say softly, lips twisting playfully when his cheeks grow scarlet.

He knocks his forehead against yours, eyes fluttering shut. “Not cute, just lucky,” he chuckles. “Lucky enough to have you.” Your heart turns over in your chest, threatening to burst out of your rib cage at his words. You try to turn in his arms. Before you can say the words that have been sitting on the tip of your tongue for months now, he’s beating you to it once again. “I love you,” he confesses in a hushed whisper, no alcoholic influence. 

Something inside of you blossoms, eyes wide as he chastely kisses you. He pulls away without you ever reacting, too caught up in surprise to kiss him back properly. He stays close, curls tickling your forehead as he leans over you. “You don’t have to say it back, I just wanted you to know. I love you,” he says again, long lashes blinking down at you. “So much. It makes me feel like a stupid teenager again, going to the mall to buy a gift for my crush.” He laughs sheepishly, reaching down to tangle your fingers together. “Is that okay?” he asks quietly, pressing a kiss to your knuckles.

It mirrors the confession he’d given you that morning, those slurred words and teary eyes. It had been difficult to pinpoint the legitimacy of it before, the meaning scrambled by his hazy mind. But with him staring at you like this now, like you single-handedly plucked the stars from the sky to put them in those sparkly eyes of his, it makes something inside you ache.

Still, you choke on your own spit. “I-Is it okay for you to love me?” you sputter incredulously, realizing the oddity of the same question he’d thrown at you earlier. But now, you’re both sober and you can really tear apart that sentence. Jungkook nods a little too seriously for your liking. “Are you crazy?” He blinks in confusion, brows pulling together as you slowly but surely lose the last bits of your sanity. “You’re an idiot, Jeon Jungkook,” you huff, “a stupidly handsome, rich, walking dream, idiot who goes out with stupid girls like me.”

“Not stupid,” he murmurs, closing in on you again as he finally understands the truth behind your masked insults. He smells minty and like his favorite body wash of yours.

“No,” you deny. “You’re actually, like, insane. You have a bachelor pad, make enough money to sustain an entire litter of kittens, look and talk like every teenage girl’s dream boyfriend— but you mess it all up by dating evil, conniving hoes like me who lose their shit over Disney cartoons.” He says nothing, watching you with an amused grin as you talk over yourself, basically regurgitating his statement from yesterday except it kinda seems plausible now that you’re over it. “It’s stupid. No, you’re stupid. No— I’m stupid.”

Jungkook chuckles, kissing the corner of your mouth gently. “Done?” he says, a dimple appearing on his cheek. You could kiss it away, but you need him to know the amount of stupidity in this room was astronomically high. “You’re not stupid, baby,” he says. You level him with a look. “Well. You have your moments.”

“Moments?” you repeat, standing up in a hurry that has him flopping down beside you. Your laptop is lost somewhere on the cushions, the voices faded as they grow farther away. “I am so stupid. I called Namjoon a whore for taking you out for lunch!” you cry. “I am the stupidest person in the world.”

Jungkook cackles, standing up beside you. “Yes, yes, you’re my stupid girl,” he teases, tapping the pout on your lips playfully. “So stupid she slanders herself instead of just telling me she loves me too.” He bumps your noses together, dark eyes staring at you almost daringly after his claim.

You fold soon enough. “I love you,” you mumble, “even if I’m too stupid to say it.”

He rewards your confession with a kiss, pulling you into his arms soon after. He sighs, almost wistfully. “Whatever shall I do with my very stupid girl?”

After exactly three minutes of feeling safe and loved in his arms, he abandons the living room in favor of leading you back to your room, where he pushes you down against your mattress. You cling to him, leaving him positioned over you at an angle. His chest presses against yours, arm curled around the back of your head. “Gotta get up, baby,” he laughs.

You shake your head, caging him in your arms. “Nuh-uh,” you murmur, legs wiggling when he places a hand on your hip.

Jungkook chuckles, pressing a kiss against the side of your ear. “Your movie is still playing in the other room,” he reminds you, thumb drawing soothing circles on your hip. You don’t release him, his mindless touch only encouraging you to keep him close. “Babe?”

You say nothing, relishing in the comfort of Jungkook’s presence. His hair smells good and feels even softer against the side of your face. The cotton shirt he found is crumpled beneath your fists, dark blue pattern wrinkling. Finally coming to terms with his new home, Jungkook eventually relaxes into your hold with a sigh.

“Alright,” he hums, patting your hip as he repositions himself more comfortably. “I get it. My pretty girl must’ve missed me, huh?” You nod, soaking in every detail about him in this moment. Jungkook shifts, the hand on your hip suddenly falling over your thigh instead. “Or should I say my stupid girl?” he purrs, hand slipping between your thighs. “My stupid, little girl?”

A gasp catches in your throat when he runs his fingers over the front of your panties. Your legs kick out wildly at the sudden touch, toes curling at the hands you dreamt about all day and night. “Oh,” you pant, each brush of his fingers feeling better than the last.

“What?” he says, mouthing against the side of your neck. His tongue feels warm, but the trails of saliva he leaves have you shivering. “Too dumb to speak?” he scoffs, biting down against a particular spot on your neck. You whimper, unsure if it’s because of his hands or his mouth.

“N-No,” you try to sneer back, fingernails digging into his skin through his shirt. His hands are getting braver now, the pad of his pointer finger dancing over your engorged clit. The sheer material of your panties certainly doesn’t help, each touch feeling like it’s being magnified three times over. And if it felt this good with underwear, you can’t even begin to imagine how it’d feel without.

You don’t have to ponder for long, because soon after Jungkook is slipping his hand beneath your waistband, touching your sensitive pussy head-on. “Kook.”

He uses your momentary vulnerability to ease himself from your hold, finally recoiling enough to smother your mouth with his. You moan in surprise, thighs quivering as he gets to work circling your hardened bud sans your panties. Jungkook isn’t the least bit kind as he kisses you ruthlessly, likes he’s trying to compensate for something with his movements. When he finally pulls away it’s with an obnoxious pop and cherry red lips. He huffs, glancing down to see where he’s got his fingers pleasuring you.

Your thighs are squirming back and forth, closing around his hand every few seconds. Jungkook snorts. “Huh, look at that,” he mutters, trailing down until his fingers are gliding over your quickly sopping folds. “Stupid girl is good for something.”

Your cheeks burn. “Kook, I’m not—“

Jungkook levels you with an unimpressed glare. “Not what? Not stupid? But I could’ve sworn you just spent the last few minutes saying you were,” he drones meanly, landing one light slap against your cunt that makes your hips buck.

You bite down a whimper. “I was just…” you trail off, eyes rolling back when he teases one finger against your opening.

“Kidding?” he supplies. “Well, I wasn’t.” Your heart stutters in your chest, eyes growing wide as he finally pushes himself off of you, propping himself up with an elbow beside your head. His gaze is dark and unrecognizable. “I think you’re so fucking stupid, doll,” he sneers. “And what are you gonna do about it?”

You should have seen this moment coming, the manifestation of that shiny side of the coin finally reaching its full potential.

While Jungkook wasn’t exactly shy about his interests, he certainly wasn’t tripping over himself to tell you every new kinky thing he wanted to try. You sort of guessed he had some interest in this sort of play a few weeks ago when you watched the Barbie movie at his place. A lot of that night had branded itself into your three am wet dreams, but there was one particular moment that stood out to you. That was you, on your knees, with him condescendingly patting your head. Or just last week, you vaguely remember the term slipping through his lips as he pleasured you with The Bullet Bestie.

The thing about Jungkook was that, until last night, he would have never admitted, or so much as even thought, that he was better than you. That was fine because you would say it enough for the both of you anyway. Did you think Jungkook was amazing, an absolute diamond among these measly rocks? Absolutely. (Were you slightly biased because you were his girlfriend? Skip.) However, you also had this insane evil villain complex that made you want to brag about everything you possibly could, especially if that meant bragging about your boyfriend.

Realistically speaking, he was better than you, that much you could look past yesterday’s anger to admit, and not even in a stuck-up, conceited way; he had a really good job, an architecturally amazing house, and a hot girlfriend. Meanwhile, you had a mediocre job, an okay apartment, and an insanely sexy Calvin Klein boyfriend, half of which he had pointed out yesterday. Regardless of how powerful that third factor was, he still outnumbered you three to one.

Sue you, Jungkook was amazing. Anyone could see that! Except, maybe, himself.

And if the only time Jungkook would openly brag about his greatness or establish how much better than you he was, was in a post-fight, sex-induced setting, then you were more than happy to be his punching bag. So long as it was on your terms, and not as a result of his weirdly bottled up feelings.

(Yeah, you would have a long talk about that tomorrow.)

But for now, you pout up at him, clamping your thighs shut purposefully. “You’re stupid too,” you defend, “stupid and mean.”

Something in his expression changes. Suddenly, he’s moving at superhuman speed as he snatches his hand out from where you had previously trapped him between your legs, yanking you up by the front of your shirt. “Mean?” he mocks. “Isn’t that what you always wanted?” You shiver, fingers wrapping around the wrist that holds your sweater. “Wanted me to be mean and push you around like a little rag doll?”

Jungkook looks at you for another two seconds, before he’s slowly pulling away from you, leaning back on his knees. His tongue is pressing against the inside of his cheek, jaw tightening from the movement. “Baby,” he says so quietly it instills a prickle of fear in you, tainted with delicious excitement.

“Yeah?” you whisper, sitting up tentatively as you watch him, He was a bit frightening, like a wild animal about to devour you whole.

Jungkook rolls his neck, the joints in his spine cracking as he begins tugging off his shirt. You salivate at the sight, too focused on the sinewy muscles of his body to catch the dark gaze he levels your way. He throws it off to the side, his sleeve of tattoos that wraps around his bicep and begins to crawl down his chest wonderfully unobstructed now. “Eyes up here,” he says and you quickly meet his gaze. He leans forward, muscled arms coming to cage you against the headboard. “Stupid little sluts don’t have the room to make such comments,” he rasps out, unamused expression adorning his normally soft features. “Don’t you think so?”

“I-I don’t know,” you stammer, leaning away as he comes closer and closer, eventually just turning your head to the side to avoid that emotionless look. It’s the wrong move, and Jungkook lets you know as much by forcefully digging his fingers into your cheeks and turning your face back around to meet his gaze.

A hand grabs beneath your knee, tugging harshly until you’re flopping down onto your back with a squeal. You settle with his knee pressed hotly against your core. Jungkook stays towering over you. “Dumb little girls who make me watch cartoons,” he spits, tracing a hand over your chest, molding your breasts beneath his hands roughly enough to make you gasp. “And watch little animal movies on Disney+. Aren’t they just so stupid?”

“So stupid,” you concede, subtly shifting your hips for some desperately needed friction. Jungkook snorts, finally granting you your wish with one rough slide of his thigh against your core.

“I agree,” he says, and surprises you with a hand around your throat as he leans in to properly grind his thigh into you. “All they’re good for is being dumb little sluts with good pussy,” he murmurs darkly, thumb pressing into the side of your neck forcefully. “Sometimes, they don’t even do anything,” Jungkook continues, his other hand on your hip hauling you higher up his thigh. You mewl, soaked panties rubbing roughly against your folds. You miss the soft swirl of his thumb, the gentle prod of his fingers. Even so, you can’t deny this change in Jungkook is doing something to you, riling up a part of you that you hadn’t known existed. Maybe it’s the horniness from yesterday that was left unfulfilled, the one year anniversary sex that was put on pause. “Just lay there and take it, too fucked out and dumb to say anything.”

His fingers loosen for the briefest of seconds and you gasp for breath. “That’s terrible,” you whimper, rolling your hips up into his thigh, so close to his swollen cock.

Jungkook chuckles without an ounce of humor, pressing your foreheads together as he helps grind you to completion. “Isn’t it? I think that stupid little girl is cute though.”

“I’m sorry,” you blurt, vision spotting as he tightens his hand back around your throat. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” you moan, stomach tight from all the stimulation.

Jungkook hums, slowing you down with a tight grip on your waist. “Hm, what are you sorry for?” he croons, pink lips pulling into an evil smile. “You said you weren’t that stupid girl, __.”

You shake your head, trying to roll your hips up again but he’s holding you too tightly now, rendering you immobile beneath him. “I am,” you choke out shamefully, grabbing at the hand on your hip in a feeble attempt to remove it. “I am a stupid little girl.”

Jungkook smirks, leaning down to slot his mouth over yours. “That’s right,” he murmurs, “nothing but a dumb little slut.”

You shiver, opening your mouth when he slides his tongue against your bottom lip. He’s not the slightest bit nice, and more messy than usual. He pulls away with a bite to your lower lip, meeting your trembling gaze with that same unrecognizable glint in his eyes. “Come on, dummy, keep up,” he snarks before devouring you again. You try to, you really do, but he’s moving like an animal today, despite his slow and drunken movements from that morning. So you end up with his saliva dripping down your throat, clinging to the corners of your lips as he begins slowly grinding you against his thigh again. He flashes you a wicked smile, pearly teeth on display for you as he glances down at your messy appearance.

“Are you gonna touch me?” you ask, lower lip trembling at the thought after your desperate rutting. Jungkook purses his lips together in thought.

“Mmm,” he hums. “Don’t know yet.”

You whine. “Jungkook, please,” you whimper, wrapping your legs around his waist. “I need you.”

Jungkook chuckles, running his hand up your waist and taking your shirt with him. He slips his fingers beneath your bra, pushing the wire over your chest as he mouths at your neck. “Cute,” he says. “Can’t do it yourself?”

You tremble, chest arching into him as he rolls your nipple between his fingers. “I-I can,” you gasp. “Just feels better with you.”

Jungkook follows your statement with a nip against your skin, tongue soothing over it right after. “Why? Because I do everything better than you? Even make you cum better than you?”

Your cheeks heat up at his blatant ego rearing its head, hands carding through the hair at the nape of his neck. You say nothing, and that only eggs Jungkook on. “Come onnn,” he teases, finally, finally rolling his hips down onto your core. You squeak, head falling back against the pillows as you’re granted the one thing you’d been chasing. “Say it.”

“Say what?” you ask, voice wobbly as he continues to slowly rut against you, the front of his shorts pressing against the soaked crotch area of your panties. “Oh, oh, Jungkook,” you whine.

Suddenly he bites down harshly, teeth digging painfully into your skin. You yelp in surprise, pussy throbbing at the pain that shoots throughout your body. Jungkook pulls away and doesn’t bother soothing over it as he leans up to capture your jaw this time. “Say you’re a stupid little slut who can’t do anything without me,” he purrs, kisses too soft for the words he says.

Your mind blanks, torn between the humiliating phrase he wants you to say and properly checking him in his place. In the end, it’s with a twisted need to please him that you’re repeating the words back to him. “I-I’m a stupid slut,” you whimper, fingers digging into his shoulder blades as he continues pushing you right along the edge. The rope pulled tightly in your core is slowly being pulled apart, threads hanging on for dear life. “Can’t... can't do anything without...”

“Without who?” he asks, reaching down and untying the front of his shorts. “Can’t do anything without who, baby?”

“Without you, without you,” you cry, bucking your hips up against his, the combined movements of both your bodies making you shake like a leaf. “Ah, K-Kook,” you wail, hips stuttering as your orgasm finally swallows you up. Your panties quickly grow wet and icky from your own arousal that pools between your thighs. Jungkook lets you writhe beneath him as you chase your high, mouth sucking a pretty blossom against your jaw.

You know better than to expect the night to end here, especially after seeing the glint that had been in his eyes as he watched you unravel.

He leans close, let’s his nose brush against yours as you catch your breath. “So perfect for me,” he groans, slotting his lips against yours. You can barely keep up with him, languidly going along with his hot tongue. “Perfect, perfect girl,” he murmurs, a stark change from the less than friendly adjectives he used just moments before. “Tell me you love me?” he says softly.

You nod, mind fuzzy as you wrap your arms around his neck. “Love you,” you exhale, letting your fingers knot in his hair. Your proclamation does something to him, makes him grind the front of his cotton shorts hard against you. For someone that was often rough and brutal with you in bed, he sure was sensitive to the mushiest of things.

“Don’t deserve you,” he huffs, hot breath fanning across your skin. He switches gears fairly quickly. “Tell me you hate me,” he begs hoarsely, rutting against your soiled panties. “Tell me I’m a piece of shit and you could do better without me,” he pleads, voice too airy to be another one of his usual sex-induced thoughts.

You shake your head, pressing a kiss to his cheek as he rolls his hips. “It’s not true,” you whisper, “I love you more than you’ll ever understand.”

Jungkook groans, suddenly winding back and tearing your ruined panties down your legs. You gasp in surprise, letting him haul you about in his blind, self-inflicted rage. “Stupid, stupid,” he huffs, though at this point you can’t tell who it’s directed at. With your underwear out of the way, he wastes no time plunging his fingers back into your cunt, bypassing the tight ring of muscle around it without any of his usual care. “You should hate me,” he snarls, lips pressed against your ear.

You moan, back arching at the sudden pleasure that blossoms between your thighs. “I-I don’t,” you gasp, toes curling.

Jungkook groans, the sound traveling down your spine and straight into your pussy. “Stupid girl,” he huffs, slipping an arm around you to pull you so close until you can’t breathe, chests lined up together. His skin is warm to the touch, scorching almost. “Fuck,” he groans, curling his fingers inside of you. You whimper and moan, incapable of staying still beneath him as he tortures you with a thumb to your clit. “Tell me you hate me,” he seethes again.

Despite the fog that’s settled over your mind, you still manage a resolute shake of your head. “N-no,” you cry, digging your nails into his back. They run dark red lines over his skin, making him hiss at the sting.

Whatever punishment he’s trying to put himself through is falling through with your refusal to admit such a thing. It aggravates him even more, your adamant stance on loving him so, and he’s retracting his fingers before you can cum again. “Please,” he chokes, face tucked into your neck. He’s sloppy with his movements; as he pulls his shorts down and kicks them away, he nearly suffocates you with his weight. “I don’t deserve you, ___, please.”

“I love you,” you whimper for lack of explanation. Jungkook leans back, that same madman gaze in his glossy eyes. He’s looking at you in disbelief almost, pouty lips puckered and swollen. Your hands slip from around him, falling on either side of your head.

Like a cobra he strikes, collecting your wrists in one hand he pins above your head. The sudden movement has him leaning in close, lips brushing over yours. His lashes are coated in a wetness he refuses to acknowledge, looking at you like you drive him insane. “If you ever try to leave me,” he whispers, jerky breath fanning over your skin, “I’ll lose my mind.”

He loves you so much it aches.

“I won’t,” you whimper, feeling your own eyes well up with an emotion that consumes every inch of your being. “I’ll never leave you, you stupid, stupid boy.”

A faint smile crosses his features at your words, lips quirking to the side. You relish in it for all of two seconds before he’s ramming his cock into you, your sensitive walls spawning around him. You sob loudly, eyes rolling back into your head. Your legs instinctively hook themselves around his waist, digging into the base of his spine as he rolls his hips into you.

You feel full and complete like he belongs there in this moment and every moment after this. It makes your heart constrict painfully. Jungkook’s soft groans follow your more unraveled noises, the vulgar slapping of skin on skin the underlying melody to it all. “Ffffuck,” he spits, greedily swallowing your moans up. You whine, arms bucking in an effort to hold him close. But he’s determined in his act of restraining you, long fingers tightening around your wrists until they hurt. “I warned you, didn’t I?” he huffs, snapping his hips into you.

Your walls clench around his hard cock, the drag as he exits sending shivers throughout your body. Jungkook’s body towers over you, glistening in sweat as he nails you into your mattress. “Remember what I said?” he asks, voice but a shuddery exhale. You shake your head numbly, overwhelmed by the rough drag across your walls. “All those months ago, when you first came over,” he adds. The hand on your hip abandons its post to cup you beneath the jaw, palm pressing sinfully against your throat enough to block the tiniest of airflow. “I’ll fuck you and keep you forever,” he murmurs, voice deeper than the pits of hell. He licks a fat stripe over your cheek like you’re nothing but a sweet for him to devour. “Do you remember that, pretty girl?”

You nod jerkily, hips arching up into him when he thrusts into you again. It’s a memory that replays in your mind every so often, your first night with the man you had planned to humiliate over a mere misunderstanding, now your boyfriend of one year. “Want that,” you gasp, tears blurring your vision when he begins picking up the pace. “Wanna be y-your pretty girl forever.”

Jungkook groans, kissing the corner of your mouth. His thighs are some magnificent beings, keeping his pace consistent even as he loses himself in his overwhelming need to kiss you. “Always,” he manages, soft lips pressed against yours. “I won’t ever let you leave.”

A shriek tears itself from your lips as he picks up that harsh piston, releasing your jaw to hold both wrists above your head. It makes his curls dangle in front of his eyes, covering that beautiful dark gaze. It makes his thin little necklace swing back and forth too, though it’s too small to actually touch your face. The rhythmic swing has you hypnotized, just like everything else about Jungkook.

With the length of his hair, you’re left staring at his lips, pulled taut between his pearly white teeth. The word from before sits heavy in your chest, begs to drip from the tip of your tongue. But he’s moving too fast and too hard, scrambling your thoughts until all you can think about is the cock plunging into your heat. His name falls from your mouth like mindless blubber instead, arms thrashing as your second orgasm swallows you up. It sends you crashing, body spasming as the sheer euphoria waves over you slowly and then all at once.

“Perfect,” he grunts, leaning down to slot his mouth against yours, “my perfect girl.” Your cum makes the sound of his hips erotic, the loud squelching following your panting. Still sensitive from your high, your body unconsciously tightens around him, keeps his cock from fully leaving. It brings a soft whine out of Jungkook, one he tries to muffle against the side of your face.

“Inside,” you whimper, even though your body feels like jelly beneath him. “Cum inside, Kook, please,” you beg.

It only takes a few more thrusts into your leaking hole for him to finally reach paradise, hips stuttering when that first shot of pleasure hits him. “Fuck, fuck,” he growls, wildly snapping his hips into your achy cunt. You moan, feeling just about brainless at the overstimulation. His cum leaves you full, almost makes your belly bulge from it. When he’s done he doesn’t bother pulling away, simply slumping into your limp form. His cock, though quickly softening, serves as a plug for the cum threatening to spill out of you.

There’s a muted noise coming from the other room, the faint sound of the mail slipping through your letterbox, the quiet chattering of the street outside. And of course, the loud blaring of your laptop playing the Phineas and Ferb theme song. Jungkook registers it at about the same time as you, a soft chuckle leaving his lips.

He pushes off of you soon after, leaning on his palms over you. He’s got that molten look on his eyes, the heat of a thousand suns burning behind those irises as he looks at you. Like he can’t get enough, even though he’s just about taken everything there is to take. “Love you,” he murmurs quietly.

A drop of sweat rolls over his forehead, clinging to the end of his eyebrow. You reach up and brush it away, let your hand trail down his face to cup his cheek. Immediately he leans into the touch, eyes falling half shut. “Love you more,” you respond.

“Impossible,” he scoffs.

Soon after you’re both stumbling out of bed, clothes haphazardly shrugged back on as you drift through the living room. There’s a thin, hot pink package sitting at the door, just having slipped through the letterbox; the stark Sexuality Unleashed logo is printed on the visible side, so you have to wonder what Doyeon could have possibly ordered this time that could be so thin. The laptop is awkwardly sandwiched next to a throw pillow, barely open a crack. Jungkook retrieves it, sets it on his lap as you scamper over to the couch.

“More Phineas and Ferb?” he asks quietly. He hates it, you know he does. And still, he wants to watch it with you.

You nod. “Please.”

He isn’t so concerned with the plot as you, clicking some random episode to start. You snuggle into his side, quietly singing along to the opening. After a moment, Jungkook speaks again. “Phineas and Flirt?” he offers cheekily.

You roll your eyes. “That might’ve been your worst one yet,” you sigh, trying to drown out his indignant huff by focusing on the screen.

“I don’t exactly see you coming up with these,” he points out, obviously feeling wronged.

Without missing a beat you say, “Disney+ and bust.”

epilogue

commercial break one ; the resolution

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