#ngl most of the writing will probably be based on medias i love but like

[stvrlets]

ALSO i miss writing SO BAD. i keep saying i wanna start again but i don’t put time aside to do it 😭 i miss all my old tumblr writing blogs even if the content on each one of them was ATROCIOUS the writing community on here is always so nice :( and ao3 is always so fun too and ohhh i need to start partaking in hobbies that aren’t just solely media consumption again…

[infriga]

I convinced my mom to try the live action One Piece, because she's the type to like this style of show even though she isn't into animation and would never read manga, but I didn't think I'd be able to convince my dad because he's usually a stickler for more grounded and realistic stories (his favourite genre is war movies, his favourite movie is Saving Private Ryan, for reference). But, when I brought up with him how I figured it probably wouldn't be his thing because it was fantasy, he mentioned to me that he does enjoy some fantastical stuff if it has like an internal universe logic, like Star Wars, and the more I thought about it, the more I remembered that he also enjoys campy fun action adventure stuff that doesn't take itself too seriously like Indiana Jones or Pirates of the Carribean.

And One Piece has both that internal logic for why people can perform crazy feats (even if it isn't explained right away) which I mentioned to him (just that there is a reason why people can do crazy things in this world), as well as the campy fun action adventure thing going for it, especially in the Live Action (the fight against Morgan's base even has a major Indiana Jones vibes ngl). So I explained that to him and asked if he wanted to try it, and he agreed to watching the first episode with me to decide if he'd watch it with my mom and me.

AND HE ACTUALLY SAID IT WAS INTERESTING SO FAR!! Like, he is NOT the kinda guy to enjoy anime or manga or even western cartoons, always refuses to watch anything anime and doesn't show any interest when I talk about it (I've managed to convince him to watch a few movies like Sword of the Stranger but it's obvious that even when he's not bored or doesn't hate it, it still doesn't catch or keep his interest), and he's really picky about anything fantasy or SciFi, if it like sets off his bullshit meter too much he starts nitpicking the logic behind certain abilities, or decisions, or explanations, etc. I once tried to get him to try Gravity Falls and he wanted to stop after the first episode. He's THAT picky.

So the fact that he actually laughed several times while watching the first episode of OPLA with me, commented about Luffy's character positively several times (he seems to think Luffy is really funny which surprised me cause I thought he'd be the most entertained by Zoro but I mean I can't blame him it is Luffy after all), never cringed or criticised or said anything about how ridiculous it was, means a lot coming from him cause he's always really blunt and honest about his opinion on this sort of stuff (which is fine I don't want him to pretend to enjoy stuff when he doesn't). He actually watched the whole first episode without it losing his attention, and seemed to have fun! And he agreed to watch the rest with my mom and me!

This sort of thing is one of the reasons why I dislike when people just dismiss the idea of live action adaptations entirely. I get that people are jaded with past failures, and don't like when live action is treated like a replacement for or improvement from animation when it isn't. But it is a valid medium just as much as animation or comics or writing are, and can be used to produce some amazing things. And the fact is, there are people who have a hard time connecting with other mediums who will otherwise never engage with this media in its original forms. Live Action, when done well and done right, can reach new audiences and welcome them into the fold in ways the original formats never can.

One Piece didn't need the live action to be popular, obviously, and the live action cannot and will not replace the original, nor should it. But I love that we get to have it alongside the manga and anime. It's just more of what we love, it's the cherry on top of an already stellar multi-layered cake. It complements the original rather than taking anything away from it. And for the first time in over a decade I might be able to share One Piece with my parents, who would only ever have a chance of experiencing it and enjoying it in live action. There's just something so awesome about that for me personally. I just wish more live action adaptations would understand what the One Piece live action understood about the adaptation process, and that's how to keep the heart of the story in-tact, so more people from more fandoms could have a chance to share something they love with more people who it would otherwise not reach.

Anyway, thank you Oda and the OPLA cast and crew for doing live action right for once!

[superstitionangel]

ngl i kinda hate my English teacher

NOW DONT GET ME WRONG!!! i love english. ive been writing stories since before i could define what fiction was. i love reading, too, most of my time that isnt taken up by my social media addiction is spent reading.

which is why im so upset about this

i am 100% sure my english teacher put my writing through an ai tool to find what was wrong with it. why do i say this? oh, i dont know, probably because after i read her comment on my Google doc i put it through the grammerly ai assistant and asked what i could improve on - which, usually, would have affirmed to me that those parts of my story actually needed work.

if my story wasn't a single page long, and everything she (and the grammerly ai) had suggested i added either was obviously unnecessary details that would have torn readers away from the story, or something I'd literally. Already done.

"describe the fire crackling more! like its dancing!" why? this is a horror story set in a graveyard and your reading the first 5 minutes of the story. we have 4 more hours for the characters to suffer through. the fire was a small detail - all it did was added a cozier atmosphere to the beginning of the story so the change later was more abrupt, like i want it to be.

"describe the forest!" this is a horror story based in a graveyard... i added one sentence about gathering wood in the woods along the fences to highlight how isolated and difficult to escape the graveyard is, which matters later. the color of the wood and the wind shaking the leaves doesn't matter. the characters can't see it, and this part of the story is very focused on one specific part; the characters setting up for a cozy night reading ghost stories around a campfire together.

"develop the relationships between the characters more!" in the first page? the first 300 words? ive already given many hints to their relationships with eachother, such as the main character and another character being clearly familiar enough with eachother for the other character to poke fun at his choice in ghost stories. two of the characters are sitting directly next to eachother, and everything they've done so far has been with eachother. not to mention... it's the first page.

the first page! I'm not going to be adding unnecessary details to the first page! i am not going to overload the readers with information like that because, honestly, this part barely matters! it's later that the scenery is important, it's later when the relationships shine, its later when the horror and isolation develops. not the first, muthafuckin, PAGE!

sorry I'm just so annoyed. so many of the things she said I needed to add were in the story, if she'd just... read it. literally all she has to do to see some of the things she's complaining about it read the words I've written out for her and REMEMBER that not only is this the first draft ever, but also, ive been sick and unable to work or write, and....... ITS 300 WORDS SO FAR!

auuuugh. please no advice because im, like, so not up for advice or criticism right now. it'd be more obvious how silly this situation is if I shared the writing, but it's just so short it feels like a waste of time to share it. i'll share it when it's closer to done if anyone wants, im just.. so tired of teachers zapping my creativity by constantly commenting on my work, when it's so obviously clear that I'm still working on it and it needs time to flourish.

[nostradamus0]

20 QUESTIONS GAME

Thanks for the tag @bronzeagepizzeria!! :)

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

39 works

2. What’s your total AO3 words count?

111,601 words

3. What fandoms do you write for?

whatever i’m hyperfixated on lol. my more recent writing has been for Supergirl, Once Upon a Time, and Doctor Who

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

swing low, supernova, & come to carry me home

love me like you mean it

we'll still be here (when it's all said and done)

you remind me: that it’s such a wonderful thing to love

the other side (of a world without you)

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

yes, but sometimes it takes me a while because of the raging adhd. i love the community aspect of fanfic, talking about writing makes me happy, and i’m always so grateful when people leave comments and i want to say thank you!! :) 

i saw someone say once that they don’t believe in responding to comments because they think people who do it are just trying to “inflate their comment count” or whatever and that is so depressing. i hope they see the light

6. What’s the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

probably i couldn't say: i need more time. that’s a real depressing fic, ngl. i remember i got really invested in writing it, even though the plot goes against everything i want for the characters

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

most of what i write is stupidly fluffy and/or sappy as hell lmao. but if i had to pick the most fluffiest, i might say what kind of woman loves like this.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

not really? i’ve gotten a few rude comments, but nothing super mean

9. Do you write smut? If so what kind?

no lol

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

i’ve never written a crossover. i’ve written, and have in progress, fics based on other media, but no actual crossovers.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

not to my knowledge

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

yes! i'm sure they did a great job but i don't speak russian so i can't actually tell

13. Have you ever cowritten a fic before?

yes, a very long time ago, and it’s lost now. the internet is not always forever. save things if you don’t want to lose them, kids 

14. What’s your all-time favourite ship?

what kind of sick question is this

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

all of them lmao. seriously though, i started a Finding Neverland supercorp AU and i dream desperately of finishing it, but likely never will.

16. What are your writing strengths?

i’m first and foremost a poet, so i’m good with sentence-level things like diction and the way lines flow and sound. alliteration and i are besties. i’m also not bad with imagery/description.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

dialogue. endings. middles. beginnings. i struggle a lot with describing actions. did i mention dialogue?

honestly, when it comes to fanfic, i think my biggest weakness is my own anxiety. i have zero experience with romantic attraction or anything, so i’m always worried i’m doing a shit job portraying it and then i get caught up in my head.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

i wish lol. i know bits and pieces of Polish and Spanish, but i’m only fluent in English. i’d love to find an excuse to use Polish, but that feels unlikely. i have a wip (that i haven’t touched in ages) that’ll eventually be supercorp but starts during Lena’s early childhood, and i’d love to use some Irish, but i have zero knowledge of Irish

19. First fandom you wrote for?

either Doctor Who or Once Upon a Time, i think? somewhere around 2013–2014? all that stuff is long gone, though.

20. Favourite fic you’ve ever written?

your voice is the splinter inside me. i poured my heart into that fic, and i’m still pretty proud of the result. i started a part 2, but i’m not in a headspace right now to finish it.

no pressure tags! @mulderscully @sssammich @benwvatt @pretty-pony plus everyone who wants to because i'm sleepy and can't think all that good right now <3

[beesbeesdragons]

hi!! i know you love history so i wanted to ask if you want to share any special cultural headcanons about amestris that are inspired by the historical setting? i know that’s a super broad question but hopefully it makes sense :)

YESSSSS!!!!

ok first! Amestris is a military dictatorship, so it makes sense that it would have restrictions on certain activities or things such as education and the entertainment industry (film, radio, music, etc etc). it probably also has censorship, both in news but also in actual letter writing. i'm exploring the topic of censorship in From The Desk of Dorothy Mustang a bit, both in the media (specifically radio) and in letters.

second!!! fashion!!! Amestris is definitely the kind of country where you don't waste materials, not if you can avoid it. hence, most of their fashion styles are rooted in practicality. in my fics, i'm writing them as having 1940s fashion, so utility suits, patching clothes, revamping old out-of-fashion clothes, carpetbags, etc. Ngl will probably end up posting a work specifically about my research and with visual inspiration for the clothing i mention.

third, food. Amestris doesn't...have the best trade relation with most of its neighbours. hence, there's probably a fairly limited amount of 'exotic' foods, and it's probably SUPER expensive or limited to the military. You might notice later in my fics that the only sweets they really mention are all hard candies, such as rock or candy drops. They don't have chocolate, and probably not 'tropical' fruits like pineapple, banana and mango. This would affect the kinds of food people eat; most people would eat offal because it's cheap and you can get creative with it. for farmers or the folks in towns like Resembool, they probably all have small veggie patches and maybe chickens. Almost everyone in towns like Resembool would also know how to pluck a chicken, how to make sausages, etc. Just practical skills, you know?

Fourth, they definitely have some sort of 'youth group', similar to scouts. Gotta get the kids involved, right? it'd provide practical skills, for girls probably homemaking skills such as sewing, darning clothes, cooking, etc. It has the added bonus of, should Amestris be invaded or at war, they have an easy way of sending messages! (that is based off how the British army used girl guides as messengers during WW1 because boy scouts were considered too unruly). This also loops back to the control the military has on education; they control the curriculum, the examinations, the entire education system.

that's all for now but I have more!!!!!

[vrtlzmbie]

Based on this post I found

1. Song of the year?

Cosmic by Red Velvet or XYMPHONY by Xdinary Heroes

2. Album of the year?

LIVE and FALL, ofc

3. Favorite Musical Artist/Group you started listeing to this year?

Kiss of Life (I fucking LOVE Bye My Neverland)

4. Movie of the Year?

...Wicked

5. TV Show of the year?

Agatha All Along (I did however, start watching Young Justice and it's so fucking good)

6. Episode of tv or webisode that defined the year for you?

"Princes All" (S3E1) From Young Justice. I'm a Brion fangirl 🤷‍♀️

7. Favorite Actor of the year?

I'm a massive Austin Butler fan girl, but Katheryn Hann literally took the cake this year. Ily mother 💜

8. Game of the year?

I literally have only had access to Roblox while at college. So either that or Block Blast lol

9. Best month for you this year?

Probably July. Most drama free NGL

10. Something that made you cry this year?

I moved like.. 4-5 hours away from home 😔

11. Something you want to do again next year?

I didn't do it this year, it was the year before, but I'd really like to go to another concert. I've only done 1 so far but I loved it do much. (Here's to hoping Xdinary Heroes comes to Texas 🙏)

12. Talk about a new friend you made this year.

Met 2 girls in my building and one is in a similar major to me

13. How was your birthday this year?

It was actually really calm. My mom bought me the Trouble Shooting album!!

14. Favorite book you read this year?

I started "A Song to Drown Rivers" by Ann Liang. I haven't able to finish it because of my workload/finals, so hopefully I can get it done either this month or in January

15. What’s a bad habit you picked up this year?

Lol hiding in my dorm. I've become so badly detached from forming relationships with people, I really gotta force myself to be more social

16. Skipping this and 17 because trying to upload pictures on mobile is hell)

17. ^^

18. A memorable meal this year?

I tried the spaghetti from the main dining Hall.... definitely a memory....

19. What’re you excited about for next year?

I was finally able to get the classes I want in my schedule, so hopefully I get my license this break so I can actually attend some of them

20. What’s something you learned this year?

That I'm way more anti social than I thought

21. What’s something new about your place of residence (room, home, or general location) now vs the start of the year?

I MOVED!!! NEW ROOM!!! (That I'm forced to share 😔)

22. Favorite place you visited this year?

Olive Garden 🤤🤤 JK!!! I got to horseback riding during Spring Break w/ My sister and her other Bridesmaids

23. If you could send a message to yourself back on the first day of the year, what would it be?

Good fucking luck!! Also do NOT value yourself based of the "friends" you've had for past 4 years. The second you graduate, they WILL dip on you, and not even bother to reach out to make sure you actually have the information to attend the massive award show where you're actively nominated for an award it. Your tech teacher will totally reach out though!! Shout out to him!

24. Did you keep any New Year’s Resolutions?

I don't even remember it, or if I ever made one in the first place :P

25. Did you create any characters (in games, art, or writing) this year? Describe one.

No 😔 just fanart/writing blurbs of pre-existing characters in media

[grxcisxhy-wp]

𝖼.𝗁. | 𝗁𝖾𝖺𝖽𝖼𝖺𝗇𝗇𝗈𝗇

back to masterlist

pairing ; calum hood x bi!5sos!reader (MAIN), mention of previous harry styles x bi!5sos!reader, mention of unrequited/pining ashton irwin x bi!5sos!reader

summary ; Prequel ish headcannon of bi!5sos!reader based on this blurb

warnings ! my humor (so bad)

word count ; ~700

a/n ; guys, this is probably so bad, but bare with me. also, so sorry to anyone who is straight, but being bi is going to be part of the story later

I’m forcing you to be Australian, deal with it

When you were younger (about 11 years old) you moved into Calum’s neighborhood right across the street from him

And you know, puberty be hitting hard, so this man instantly gets a crush (cause you’re beautiful duh) and befriends you

But of course, he doesn’t say anything (for another few years)

You guys are each other’s closest friends, and you end up being each other’s first kiss (a classic)

The two of you will just play music together on the weekends or after Cal’s soccer practice

You play piano and guitar (and sing but we’ll get into that later)

The two of you meet Luke and Michael when you go into high school and you guys form the beginnings of 5sos

Luke and Michael quickly begin to feel like brothers to you

Then Michael Facebook messages Ashton

When you meet Ashton, you are a complete MESS

Like stuttering like an idiot because his humor just tugs at your heart strings and you’re crushing HARD

You tell Calum about it, obliviously hurting his feelings

poor fetus Calum :’(

but he still supports you

eventually your puppy love with ash goes away and you meet someone

someone that’s a GiRl (yes, you’re bi curious and we’re living for it)

you’re all confused that you feel this way about a girl and questioning your sexuality (as most do in high school)

nothing happens with the girl (nothing ever does… I’m not crying you are)

but you do confide in Calum that you find girls attractive

poor Calum is thinking you're gay, but you reassure him that you do still in fact find guys attractive too

Calum is super supportive and eventually convinces you to tell the rest of your band mates

they’re all supportive too

someone definitely makes a joke like “I don’t blame you. Girls are hot”

would probably be ash or Mikey

we love a good coming out story

anywayyyyy

you and the boys are making youtube covers and becoming quite popular

then the one direction tours

you practically melt when you meet Zayn and Harry (at least I would)

during the tours your management and 1d’s management decide to do a pr stunt with you and harry of a will they won’t they situation

ngl you and harry did hook up a few times after you turned 18 (sorry to those of you who do not like harry styles, which should be none of you)

calum is pretty much over his crush on you by the time the first album comes out (at least that’s what he says)

fans of the band kind of speculate that you might be bi when you sing lyrics like “you’re like the perfect mixture of megan fox and katy p” (greenlight underrated bop imo)

ofc the question comes up in interviews but you and the boys dodge ‘em like ninjas

you came out to the world on your terms during sounds live feels live tour

and this is frat 5sos era so just like them you’re pulling the ladies AND the gentlemen

you’re more discreet abt it tho cause we know how the media be about women who have multiple partners (the media is disgusting)

then there’s the hiatus

during this time, you get back to writing pieces with piano aka you’re the genius behind ghost of you and lie to me’s piano melody

during the writing process of youngblood is also when you and calum start becoming more than friends

you write why won’t you love me about him cause you’re oblivious that he likes you too

you show a demo of wwylm to luke (who is almost as close to you as calum now) and he convinces you to play it for the rest of band and put it on the album

this leads to feelings being confessed and you and calum end up together

you and calum date for about a year and a half before the unfortunate when will you be back blurb comes into play

and then you’re a mess, which is where I’ll be starting this series(??)

so yeah, lmk what moments you want to see like interviews and just relationship things and I’ll do my best to write them well

[kithmet]

4 31 & 43 for ask game :]

4. Link your three favourite fics right now.

i want us both to eat well by @stevebucky for sure, my favourite wip and it gets the characterization, banter, dialogue, dynamics so right. i can't wait for more :") it deserves so much love and i hope everyone is reading! :D

i guess i never see the signs by @alsoalison. this is complete, it's a top-tier fic and one of those in the fandom that i consider a comfort read. i've read this many times already and will probably continue to do so in the future. also i generally love alison's fic concepts, i find that they're thoughtful and nuanced and FUN and that's one of the most important things i need when i'm looking for fics.

after us, the flood by @twinklehowl is another fic which i read and just immediately knew it would have very beautiful writing and dynamics. it's another comfort fic for me too, i've been meaning to reread it (i probably will do this tonight actually). so deserving of love.

31. Of the characters you write for, which is your favourite? Has that choice been swayed at all by your followers/readers’ reactions to certain ones?

i love writing dream pov, perhaps because i find myself comfortable with understanding him and i relate to him... a lot, hahaha. but i love writing george through dream's pov as well, and i do actually think i gained more of an appreciation for writing george just simply based off of how people reacted to my george characterization (which was surprisingly positive! i didn't expect that). so i love writing them both. :") but i deeply love side characters too. and i'm ngl i absolutely am loving writing sapnap, both in the past and for sftws, it's really fun exploring his characterization as well.

43. Talk about a positive experience with fanfiction or the fanfiction community that you will always remember.

i'm kind of shocked, in a positive way, that people enjoy my writing to the degree of talking about it on social media (like, places where i wouldn't even see). i guess i didn't expect that when i started writing; it's very rewarding and validating and i feel so good about my writing in this fandom because of it, but i genuinely only began writing because (1) i loved the pairing and wanted to attempt my own take on it, (2), i love writing, and (3) i wanted to write for ME and for my friends. and then people turned out to like it as well! which is. really fucking cool. and i appreciate it a lot :") i feel like 80% of the attention i've gotten on my fics is because people in this fandom or friends told other people to read it and i find that really heartwarming.

writing ask game

[fmdtaeyongarchive]

q3 2021 update & plot call !!

below the cut, you can find an update on ash’s current life, career (or rather absence of), and development for quarter three, as well as plot and thread ideas! if you see anything that you’d like to plot out or write with him, like this or message me, and we can get to it! i have a lot in mind about where ash is right now, so i might add more and expand later on!

mentions of ash’s continuing struggle with mental illness under the cut in case you don’t wanna read that rn

professionally

ash is on hiatus the whole quarter so... not much going on here.

uhh basically the first two days of july he was still trying to get bc to let him take a break so schedule threads could be set then if they cross paths at the bc building! he’s going to be participating in concert rehearsals for knight to a less intense extent since bc, as of the beginning of his hiatus, fully intends him to participate in the concerts. he’ll miss about the first half of the tour, but in july and august he’ll still be attending knight tour rehearsals some to keep up. schedule threads can also be done then!

(note that he’ll be missing the bc city concert as well — i don’t see him dropping by just to support either tbh, sorry bc ppl. white knight duo ver tho let’s gooooooooooo)

ash will eventually start writing music and finding his love of that again though and that’s pretty much the most work he can do during his hiatus, so it’d be cool to maybe have him write, compose, or produce for a few people that might be releasing later this year or sometime next year if anyone is interested? :) we can see if ash would work for it. there’s also opening for him to ask a few people he’s close to to sing some demos for him when he starts trying to write again!

personally + plot ideas!

explaining how he got to his hiatus would take me all day but he basically forced bc’s hand in letting him take time off (well, he wanted to leave knight and retire ngl but his manager was like... you know that’s not going to happen let’s try a hiatus <3). you can read my badly-written solos for part of it (i still need to write more) but generally, the most other muses might know is that they might have run into him acting kinda moody/down or impulsive/irresponsible lately, he made a very uncharacteristic post on social media that hinted at being unhappy with his life currently and losing passion/excitement for even the things he used to value most highly before his social media was deactivated by bc lmaaooo. the post would have probably conveyed Something was up it it wasn’t like genuinely super triggering-level content i promise !! bc released a statement shortly after stating he’d be going on hiatus without mentioning a definitive end date.

so there’s the possibility a muse might have checked up on him after that post / the hiatus news to see how he was doing?

tbh ash isn’t going to be seeking out meeting new people during his hiatus. he’s taking time to himself and is only going to make any effort to hang out with people he’s comfortable with. those he’s not close to, he’s going to have to interact with by running into unintentionally.

he’s getting a place in jeju in the early-ish part of his hiatus. he’ll be spending a lot of time there at first because he just wants to get away from seoul, so it’d be nice to set some threads there if your muse has the time to hop over to visit him if they have anything resembling a free day. (again a certain level of closeness would be necessary, but i think one good heart to heart conversation beforehand could bring someone closer to him enough for that rn! even over text tbh lmao). chuseok would be a really good time for this !! i imagine catching up over lowkey dinners or heart to hearts under the stars, that found family ash has actively fought having lol

(that place in jeju is also going to be where he starts to want to write music again too, so music based stuff there would be chill?)

heart to hearts in general anywhere would be really good for ash right now so please give me those! they can be in seoul too for sure.

he’ll be moving into a new apartment in seoul eventually, though that will probably be a little later in his hiatus? he had some bad fan/sasaeng run-ins right before his hiatus and having so much time off makes him realize he wants to move. someone can help him house hunt or if someone else is looking for a place, they can talk together about it. i want him to realize he wants to move into a smaller place that can feel more like home

once he does move, muses are free to come over and help him set up / be his one-man housewarming party. that’s a little down the line tho !! so we might not want to plot that as a thread to write right this instant

he may also be getting a pet ! muses can come look with him at a shelter or he can run into people there!

this would be a little later in his hiatus, but it’d be interesting if once he’s doing a little better, he gets the urge to dance and runs into a muse at the dance studio. idk that he’ll ever fall completely back in love with dancing, but he might rediscover some of what he did love about dancing and ash and this muse often run into each other as he visits that dance studio a little more often and they eventually bond over it / do some dancing together.

those who still really have that passion for making music ash has lost, talk to him about it <3 he misses it. he might cry but tbh he’s liable to cry in any thread

he’s cutting his hair short and dying it back to black this month, so it would be possible to run into him at the hair salon!

ash will want to be inside at home mostly at the beginning of his hiatus, but as it goes on, he’ll start to branch out and that will offer some more opportunities to hang out. he’ll try not to go to bars and clubs really, but small music venues or jazz lounges, small indie cinemas, galleries, those kind of things will be up his alley

idk that there’s much plotting to be had around this, but this long hiatus on top of the other hiatuses he’s had and his acting out before this hiatus is going to make some of the bc team realize it might not be super wise to keep pushing him hard as a cf model (and in the long run, just less of pushing him as a major idol star within the company in general tbh) so he’ll be able to get some more tattoos and piercings and will become more comfortable, hopefully, with presenting himself how he wants to be seen / having some development in that good ol’ lack of bodily autonomy aspect ash has always had going on. he’ll be coming out of hiatus living much more of his 2021 jk fc truth with the full sleeve and the eyebrow piercing .

uhhh ? pretty far down the line but i’ll mention it while it’s on my mind :) i think it’d be cool if ash did a collab (mini-)album (or two?) at some point after getting off hiatus. i’d want it to be someone he really clicks with creatively (though they don’t have to be a songwriter — i can see it working as collaborative songwriting or as ash feeling really inspired to write for them) and wants to work with since it’s not going to be something he’s letting bc push him into it at that point, and something that just happens organically. realistically, this would work with a female vocal best by far, maybe a male rapper just based on the songs ash does / i can see him doing. probably wouldn’t want to commit to anything fully rn unless it really clicks but i wanted to throw the idea out there :)

uhmmm?? ig i should also mention ash will be paying attention to his health both mental and physical he’s been neglecting for a while. there isn’t too much to say regarding plotting here because he needs to handle it himself with trying new therapy, medications, understanding there’s some stuff beyond “just” his depression going on. coming to accept nothing’s ever going to be perfect, but that self-awareness and effort can help more than denial can. not super plot potential-y but i’ll mention it since this is all the personal update section

basically, ash is taking time to recover mentally (and physically) and ultimately hopefully leave hiatus in a better place than he started where he can be more comfortable in his career, even if just a little bit, in himself, and in his life. if he can have some good, developing threads during the time, that’d be great!

[lowlypotatofarmer]

my thoughts on

julie and the phantoms

also now that i’ve finished the show, i will be tagging any future posts containing potential spoilers with #jatp spoilers for at least the next few weeks so you might want to blacklist that if you haven’t already?

spoilers under the cut

(it got kinda long and messy and chaotic i’m sorry in advance)

i have so many feelings about that show. it was genuinely so so good (i’m going to try to not harp on the gay rep too much but i will bring it up because as a gay, i obviously enjoy it)

julie: starting with julie because while i love her dearly, i have a lot more to say about the boys. julie is an amazingly well written character and all of her reactions to things feel so real, from the emotions behind her being unable to play piano at the beginning, to three guys just appearing, to playing for the first time. it’s tangible. and she doesn’t do that thing i hate, where something bad happens and all is immediately forgiven after a little ass kissing, she actually holds grudges and reacts like an irl person would to being stood up at the dance. i love her so so much. also she’s absolutely gorgeous (and by her i mean the actress ofc)

boys: anyway, the meat of this. the boys. words cannot describe the stupid amount of affection i feel for these absolute idiots. i’m always hesitant about the ‘pretty boys’ in media because 9 times out of 10, they don’t have personalities or emotions. mainly the emotions part. media is often still stuck in that idea surrounding toxic masculinity, that strong men can’t cry and have emotions and be affectionate and feel things deeply while still being strong. the second we are introduced to the boys you can tell that is not the case.

this fucking boyband. the passion in the songs, the meaning. something you don’t find everywhere. not to mention their friendship. i could write an essay on their friendship. god, i want what they have. they all just love each other so much and are so comfortable with one another. the thing i keep thinking about is how casual they all are about alex’s sexuality. obviously they had some time between when he actually came out and the story, but never once do they seem anything less than fully normal about it. it isn’t a big deal and it shouldn’t be. the point being, i don’t know how the 90s were, homophobia-wise, but i like to think 2020 is probably coming to the best it’s ever been but even now, most straight guys are still uncomfortable being around gay men. luke and reggie rib alex about his crush on willie the same way they poke fun at luke for the chemistry between him and julie or with reggie and any girl he ‘flirts’ with. i fucking love it so much.

also not to stray from my point but luke and reggie also have some chemistry when they share a mic. not necessarily romantic but it’s There and definitely gives their performances an extra something. and the scene where luke sings at reggie and “that was pretty hot” where he kisses his fingers and puts them against reggie’s lips was easily in my top 5 fav scenes it was just so funny

but anyway, back on track. none of them are afraid of being real with each other. alex’s constant anxiety and the jokes about him crying for 25 years (and him dancing with dirty candy? amazing scene), reggie being upset when his house had been turned into a bike shack, literally every song luke writes being a piece of his soul that he’s sharing with not only the others, but the world (i cried during that whole ‘unsaid emily’ part, ngl). they’re best friends, and maybe it’s just because i have no straight guy friends to base it off of, but the honesty between them is something i rarely see in friendships between guys, even though we should.

honorable mentions:

absolutely love that connection between julie and sunset curve via her mom (the waitress)....that was supposed to be the implication, right? rose was her mom, she was the waitress bobby flirted with, she mentioned the bands she’s been in, one of those was rose & the petal pushers (the ticket on the top of her mom’s trunk?)

also bobby being trevor who is carrie’s dad was also a fantastic connection, though i really wish we got a scene about the boys actually confronting him about stealing the music, or even just catching up. the reveal of trevor seeing the boys on youtube and then in person was 11/10 but i wish there would’ve been a bit more payoff there, just a personal point

and then finally i swear to god if caleb fucks with nick’s friendship with julie or turns him into an asshome i will personally murder a fictional character. i will find a way. nick is amazing i love him.

i like flynn as a character but it kinda annoyed me how, in ep3 before finding out about the ghosts, she was so quick to anger about julie hiding things from her (understable anger though) but IMMEDIATELY went to text julie’s dad when she forced julie into telling her what was actually going on. like if you want your friend to tell you things, maybe going directly to her dad the second she does confide in you isn’t the best way to go about it. then again, i’ve never had a friend lose a parent and start seeing ghost bandmates so maybe i would do the same thing.

willie and alex are so adorable and booboo stewart plays the slightly dorky skater perfectly. i am a SUCKER for a good fanfic type pairing and nothing says that more than the skater and the drummer. also alex’s “get woke” to luke was the fucking funniest thing he’s so dorky

anyway, if you read all that, big kudos to you. and if you didn’t that’s understandable, i would probably skip it too. yall should share your fav scenes, i’m really genuinely curious so like submit an ask or something, i want to know!

[aloera]

The ask prompt is too long to fit into an ask TT_TT but here's the doc for it docs(.)google(.)com/document/d/1yDI7iFRhOJ8ENv_IwZAo3rDSUqj80EiJROS10RzRbj4/edit

the lengths u are going for this,,, much appreciated you're very sweet!!!

prompts + answers under the cut!!

INTRODUCTION

Name: aloera

AO3 account: aloera

Fandoms you write for: bnha

How many stories have you written so far: 19

FANFICTION PROFILE

What's your favorite fandom to write for? hmm,,, used to do pjo and eah (ever after high) and eah was fun as fuck i will say!!! i think bnha is my fav mostly bc i made the most friends in this fandom :D

What's your favorite character/person to write for? bkg and kirishima!! cannot choose do not make me <3

Fic you'd want to improve? probably what we deserve? i rushed the beginning and the confession is a bit stilted imo

Hardest fic you've written? between lion and men -_- bc there is so much canon compliant stuff i've gotta write out before i get to the divergence and its HARD

Easiest fic you've written? come home to me!!! it happened so easily,,, no second guessing no writers block just vibes <33 was lovely i miss it

What would you say is the most "famous" fic you've ever written? also probably come home to me? its got the most interaction

first line of the first fic you've ever written and published. [not including my 2014 ffnet fics] "The bell rings, class starts, and Katsuki and Midoriya are inexplicably absent." from come home to me

Have you ever done a collab with another writer? yes!!!!! on two separate occasions and its so fucking fun i highly recommend trying it out its the best

Do you beta? if asked but honestly im a shit beta lmao

Do you like joining fic fests/exchanges? depends on what i have going on irl but in general yeah!!

FANFICTION PREFERENCES

Fluff or angst? definitely fluff

"OCs" or "Reader" inserts? reader inserts!! have been going ham on them recently

Blurbs or drabbles? blurbs!!

One thing you love about fanfiction i just. i really love slice of life romance?? and most media doesn't give you that bc its dedicated to plot and action and that's valid!! but fanfiction fills in the gap which is really nice

One thing you don't like about fanfiction most of the stuff i don't like is less about actual fanfiction and more about how people behave about it

What is/are your favorite fandom author/authors? IVE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS ONE!!! TURN IT UP!!!

bnha: hiuythn, rae_tnub, Moniix, Ata_Lanta, wrunic, chezka, PurplePersnickety, surveycorpsejean, mahadevi, arxaris, deviance, Oceanbreeze7, MikeWritesThings, bonnia, wonhaebunny, dinosuns

voltron: hiuythn, Oceanbreeze7, DeerstalkerDeathFrisbee, arahir, dinosuns,

and honorable mention to loveclouds im not even in the haikyuu fandom i just love their fics So Much

these are just the ones off the top of my head i have so many favourites idc if i'm only supposed 2 have one!! die mad about it!!!

What is your favorite trope? secret relationship + relationship reveal til the day i die babie <3 <3

Least favorite trope? hm,,, probably just like. angst lmao i cannot stand 90% of it

A fanfiction cliché that you can't help but love? coffeeshop aus,,,, so good

Do you have a type when it comes to pairings? the otp where its like. piece of shit + himbo = love. ex. krbk, catradora, jade/beck

Favorite setting/au? hm,,, truly i cannot pick one KGKSJNHKj but i really like college aus!! and modern aus!! and roommate aus!!

Explain the meaning of your favorite line of dialogue you've written as if someone hasn't read it in context. “He doesn’t know,” Katsuki says, softly. “My timer stopped and nothing happened. He’s not mine.”

the line is from what we deserve!! it's a soulmate au where your timer counts down to the moment that you meet your soulmate!! bakugou's timer ends at USJ when he and kirishima attack kurogiri at the same time (impulsive kings <33) but kirishima's timer doesn't end until kamino because that's when he accepts himself as bakugous soulmate!! unfortunately, when bakugous timer has reached 0, he turned to see that kirishima's was still ticking and therefore believes that kirishima isn't his soulmate.

this line just,, idk. it's really sad. bakugou is such an action-driven character? if something doesn't go his way he Makes it go his way. he's got this insanely volatile quirk and he's got impeccable control of it!! but his love for kirishima isn't something that he can change and he's not going to ruin kirishima's chance of finding his own soulmate because he loves him and wants him to be happy. i really wanted to focus on how resigned he is? and how unusual that is for a character like him.

Favorite trope/genre to write? again, secret relationship with relationship reveals <33 fluff in general is my wheelhouse!!!

A trope/genre you haven't written but think would be a fun challenge? idk if this counts?? have been working on some dead dove concepts!! its super different from what i normally write so its a cool challenge

The one trope/concept you'll never touch and why probably cheating/infidelity?? it just looks,,, super difficult to write well and i don't have enough of an interest in it to try it out

Which do you prefer to write: longer or shorter fics? shorter!! low attention span gang <3

Ideal length to read? 5-10k?

Ideal length to write? 4-8k!!

How long was the longest fic you've ever written? control fraek is around 28k i think?

Have you ever written an AU? yeah!! i've done restaurant au's, soulmate au's, pro hero aus, and fantasy aus (general, not the bnha fantasy ending)

What's your favorite AU trope? hm,, probably when two people in authority are in a secret relationship? ceo's/uni professors/etc etc

Have you ever written smut? yeah!! was. difficult tho

What's your comfort genre? (the one you fall on most in writing/reading) fluff,,, hurt/comfort,,, fix-it fics with happy endings <3

If you were to start writing in other fandoms, which would they be? maybe jjk?? the characters are really cool!!!! fr i might go back to my ever after high roots i love the characters and setting so Much its so fun!!! idec if no ones into it anymore!!!!!

Is there a trope you think you could be easily recognized by in your writing? i've had people say they saw the mention of buff hagakure and recognized it was me so. probably that skdjhnksjd

WRITING STYLE

How would you describe your style? i tend to use shorter sentences and pretty simple words i think? and i gravitate towards lighthearted concepts that allow for ensemble casts and humour!!

Describe your style in three words romcom but fanfic

Favorite words to use when writing? the word reverent!! fuckin love including it!!

Dialogue tags or no dialogue tags? (she said, he said, they said, etc) dialogue tags!!!

Favorite dialogue tag (other than said, if you use them) again idk if this counts but "they said softly" is unmatched

Long sentences vs short vs a mix short <33

What colors would you use to describe your writing? hm,,, depends on the fic i would say?? control fraek is dark green to me?? kinda like a forest at night yk?? scary but there's still life there. sugar cookies is yellow like early morning sunlight, when it rains is yellowy-orange like a caution sign. not gonna list all of them cause theres a lot its just. do u get it? the colours change based on the vibe of the fic.

What song or music genre would you use to describe your writing? think. i am constantly trying to emulate that moment at the end of wasteland baby when hozier goes "im in love/im in love with you."

What kind of metaphors do you rely on? religious metaphors my beloved <33 they're just so pretty!!! i also love comparing stuff to water for some reason?? like that ocean vuong quote thats like "what are you now?/water." it goes hard!!!

What's something you'd say is experimental in your writing at this time? definitely action!! i have,,, no idea how to write it so anything i do is really just me playing around and seeing what works and what doesn't

Do you prefer to write by hand or to type? i've tried both!! personally i prefer typing because it goes way faster but i will say that writing by hand lets me get words down when i'm going through writer's block

What is your preferred place to write (notebook, laptop, cellphone, etc.)? laptop!!

What app/apps do you use to write (word, notepad, etc.)? google docs skjdnkjh its fine on desktop but mobile is,,,,, disgusting

Do you keep a notebook or file/notes page in your phone/device for notes on your writing? ngl i just have everything organized in my drive?? one folder per fandom and then sub folders for ideas+hcs, unfinished wips, and finished fics. multichaps get sub sub folders so i can organize outlines and drafts

Do you listen to music to help you write? yeah!! playlists organized by fic vibe :D

Where do you usually go to write (bedroom, living room, etc.)? mostly in my bedroom??? but moving around to different stops helps too i think!!

How long does it usually take for you to write? again this depends on what i have going on irl, how attached i am to the idea, my mindset at the time, etc!! i am,, the least consistent person skjnhdkjh.

What's your favorite font to use when writing? times new roman my beloved

Other writing habits? sometimes i'll write in the dark?? bad for my eyes but for some reason it gets the words flowing

CONCEPTUALIZATION

How do you conceptualize your ideas? (See specific moments like they're a movie, writing specific lines in your head, don't know until you put the words on paper, etc.) i tend to get inspiration from movies, books, poems, or other fics!!! sometimes one line just makes me go oh,, i want to write something like that,,, and then it helps me create an idea that makes me feel the same way?? i did this with control fraek!!!! i wanted a scenario where bakugou was cold and calculating and i was like hm. to do that he’d have to be focusing on something important. and from there i was able to flesh out the rest of the idea.

Which comes first: the pairing or the plot? with krbk its always always the pairing,, i'll be sitting there like wow <33 i love them <33 what if one of them had amnesia <33 (which, yes, wip!!) otherwise it's usually the plot!! and i slot in characters that i feel make sense

Have you ever used a prompt? yeah!! used a prompt for wlw week 2020 and it was fun as hell

Do you write around the story around a specific scene you want to get to or do you start from a plot idea definitely the first!!!! i almost always write like,,, a super messy scene thats 90% dialogue, keep it in my head, and then write the entire fic around that one moment

Do you find that you include a projection of some part of yourself in the way you write a character? a lot of the time when i write love confessions or love in general i'll have one of the characters think or say that the other person makes their head quiet? and it's because that's what i feel whenever i'm in love?? a quiet mind. i project on characters yeah but i think most of the projection actually goes to the way that i write love

Do you research some of the things you write deeply, partially and kind of wing the rest, or play entirely by ear (in this case, go with whatever base knowledge of the subject you have)? most of the time if i do research it'll be about the setting (ex. the izakaya in to have and to hold) or if i'm having the characters interact with an object that they like. need to know how to use (me, in control fraek: google. hey google. does someone die if they get shot in the foot??? no???? awesome thank u <3)

Have you ever had an idea for a story and forgot about it? lmaoo yeah all the time i'll find like 500-2k words of concepts in my gdocs like i do. not remember this at all

Is there a trope you think you could be easily recognized by in your writing? probably krbk secret relationship lmao

Are there concepts you've tried that turned out better than expected? yeah!! i fully thought the action in control fraek would be awful but it turned out not bad??? which im happy with

Are there concepts you've tried that turned out worse than you expected? again, what we deserve, i personally think it would have worked out better if i'd paced it slower and drawn out the pining but i. do not feel like going back to fix it so its staying the way that it is. pining is so fucking hard to do AHHHH i get so tired with it!!! im like just date already!!!!

PROCESS

How do you come up with titles? in rare occasions (literally. all my multichaps for some reason) the title comes after writing like .5 words of the first chapter im like YES this is it!!!!! sometimes i write the whole thing and pick out one line that fits (what i did with come home to me) a lot of the time i just. steal from songs or poems that i like

What's your favorite emotion to cause on your readers? i like making people happy!!!! love when people comment saying they're cheered up

What's your favorite emotion to write? lovelovelovelovelovelove

Have you ever cried or felt any emotion while reading something you've written? never cried?? but sometimes i'll rereading my hurt/comfort fics 4. yk. comfort

Do you write in order or whatever comes to you? in order!! unless i have a scene that i Need to write and i'll quickly jot it down so that i don't forget

Usual way you procrastinate while writing? ...doing asks like this, making playlists, discord, watching netflix. what don't i do smh

Do you outline or free write? i am. so shit at outlines. i mostly free write and write lil notes for stuff that i wanna add later

Do you set word goals or scene goals (scenes you want to include)? yes!! like i said i'll write loose notes for scenes that i want to add later!! it gives me something to write towards :D

What do you consider when writing your scenes? what goes into making the atmosphere and mood you want? to set a scene i do two things? the first is like,, the five senses bc that always sets the scene really well and makes it feel Real. i'll visualize stuff in my head like its a movie and write out what i would want to tell the set designer?? if the lights are low, if the space is busy, if it's supposed to exude comfort or not.

for putting forward the character's mood one thing i've found that makes a difference is sentence length!! long sentences are good for making a character seem flustered and nervous or not really in control of their emotions? good for love confessions. short sentences are good for when the character is focused on something or short on time. good for fights!!

What's something you never considered to include in your writing that you can't leave out now? def buff hagakure,,,, once i thought of it i was like. if i don't include this at least once in every single fic how could i look at myself in the mirror!!!!!! how could i face anyone!!!!

How do you start a story? establishing a fact about the character or describing the setting! option a is one single thread of gold, option b is between lion and men

How do you end a story? either by tying it back to the beginning or doing like a funny kind of closing??? option a is sugar cookies, option b is a godless society

How do you get out of writer's block? change something!! move something!! i go from typing to handwriting, moving from my bedroom to my living room, switching wips to work on something else!! i do sprints as well?? give myself like fifteen minutes to write something and sometimes 200 words opens up the way for another 2k. sometimes i'll just delete like 500 words and start fresh

Do you edit? or do you toss your writing out there? i edit!!! i'll go over it myself then send it to one or two betas (bee my beloved <33)

How do you edit? do you use spellcheck, grammar checkers, etc? bee is my grammar checker bc he is So Good with grammar. i use grammarly as well for spellcheck stuff mostly?? sometimes my edit process is just like "am i tired of looking at this!! yes <3" and then i post it

PROGRESS

Do you usually like what you write? yeah!!! i post stuff that makes me happy and that i'm fine with rereading!!! i write stuff for self-indulgence reasons first and foremost and i think my writing reflects that sjhnksj

Have you ever written something you didn't like but posted anyways? nope!! even what we deserve i LIKED even if i see a lot of room 4 improvement!! if i don't like smth it's not getting posted

Do you find yourself rereading your writing often? yeah!! the reason i wrote so much krbk secret relationship is because i loved it but i'd read all that there was so i just,, wrote more,, ngl its kinda nice being in a place where i actually like my writing bc i can write stuff that i want to see and really enjoy it!!

Can you tell us anything about your current WIP? sure!! i'm currently working on when it rains which is a fic where bakugou gets hit by a crying quirk!! i'm gonna be using it to explore So Much of all might's character and his relationships with bakugou and aizawa (and i think some people from his past!!)

Can you give us a sneak peek on your current WIP? “You did something. What the hell did you do?” Kirishima sounds pissed off. It would amuse Katsuki if he wasn’t fighting just to stay standing.

“Nothing he didn’t ask for,” Shinsou replies.

“K’ri… shima,” Katsuki croaks out. “‘S fine. Not him.”

His chest collapses back into the familiar dry heaving after that but Kirishima shuts up. He doesn’t apologize to Shinsou.

Kirishima’s a good friend, stubborn and loyal. He stands by Katsuki’s side like an attack dog, blocking him from the view of anyone ogling at his tears.

The last line you've written Ochako knows more than she'd realized. She knows enough to keep her guard up.

It’s not enough.

Open a wip. what’s the first line?

Katsuki wakes up feeling like absolute fucking shit.

INSIGHT

What's your favorite thing about writing? touched on this before but it's mainly just being able to write the things that i want to see and actually enjoy them!!! actually reread them!!!! i thought "wouldn't it be cool if bkg and kirishima owned a restaurant together" and then i wrote it and i like it enough to reread it!!!! being able to create content for myself makes me. so happy

How do you keep yourself inspired? this is gonna sound narcissistic maybe but honestly i'm just really excited about my ideas and where i'm gonna take them and the idea of "i'm gonna get to That scene" keeps me going through the entire thing. also my friends!!!! i'll talk to them about fics and their reactions keep me hyped up enough to finish!!!!

What is your favorite thing to write? just,, slice of life romance,,, stuff thats silly and makes people laugh!!

What do you think your strengths are in writing? i'm good with dialogue!! i do lil voice acting sessions with myself to make sure everything sounds natural and like it's coming from that character skhjnskj

i'm comfortable with my portrayal of love as well??? i spend a lot of time thinking about what it is exactly that i'm trying to get across and i think it turns out well!!

What are things you wish you could practice more? on one hand i wanna get better at writing angst on the other hand i dislike writing angst. do you see my issue

One way you've improved your writing since you began? characterization!! i think i've gotten better at writing characters that are all Different and bring different things to the table!!! i used to project a lot more and it would compromise the characterization because the character was like 70% me and 30% them? not to say that projection is bad but if you do it too much it just,, doesn't read like the character and from a reader's standpoint the narrative can become less compelling

One aspect of writing you're still working on? writing action!!! i. literally hate writing it but i write for a fandom about superheroes so. Unfortunately i gotta learn.

A piece of writing advice you've learned while writing saw this on another tumblr post but they said sometimes if you're struggling with a scene, the problem is five lines back. i've found that to be true!!!! sometimes u gotta delete a chunk and start a little ways back!! i did this with too busy being yours because i was stuck for Weeks and i deleted like 25% of what i had but it helped me actually finish it :D

A bit of writing advice you can't stand when people shit on show don't tell for being overrated lmao bc when u read their writing you can Tell

Something you wish you knew when you first started writing? ,,,,honestly i kind of wish i could know some of the stuff that i used to when i first started writing?? technically i'm better now but creatively i was must better when i wasn't stressing about whether anyone would like what i was writing. so i guess i wish i knew that i should keep that confidence? i kinda wish that i wasn't as insecure about other people's writing styles because i never used to be!!

Something you've learned in life that you apply in writing there's no point in feeling inferior?? writing one genre isn't better than the other. being in one fandom isn't better than being in another. the kind of language you use or the length of your paragraphs- none of that stuff like. matters. what matters is that you're having fun and happy with what you're creating!!!! enjoy other peoples writing but don't let it make you feel worse about yours :D

[peonybane]

Hey there, soooo... I don't know whether you heard about VIXX and Hongbin, but just thought I'd check in, whether you had or hadn't yet. I feel quite bitter. I was very upset with what happened to Wonho last year when he left Monsta X, but with Hongbin it seems like he is quitting being a performer altogether 😖😢

So I am going to be answering this under the cut (both so people don’t have to read a long ask, but also because of the subject matter). Please let me know if you’d like me to remove this as an ask, I’ll repost my opinion as an original.

Disclosure: While I’m very into VIXX and other kpop groups, unless it ends up on my Tumblr dash, I know absolutely nothing about what’s going on. I don’t have most forms of social media. So if there’s are some factually wrong things down below, it’s because I’m only vaguely aware of certain details. Most of this is my own personal opinion and intuitions as well. I will also state here that I know very little about the twitch controversies except for hearsay so I’ll only be referring to one case, the most relevant one.

I was never into Monsta X as I am with my other groups, but I feel like this is worse than when Wonho left. I’m not disregarding that it wasn’t painful or upsetting for Monbebes. But... Wonho left to protect his group. But he’s continuing to do what he loves. I feel like Hongbin is leaving, so he can survive. While I hope that he’s not leaving as a performer entirely, I respect his decision if he decides to have nothing to do with being an entertainer ever again.

So, I’m ngl, I am a combo of a shit ton of things, but mostly, I am a combination of livid and proud.

I am livid at the people who started this shit. I am so fucking pissed because people forget that idols are human beings too. They have feelings, they have OPINIONS.

I am so fucking pissed at the company(ies). I don’t know which company has greatest power in this or who this all happened under, but either way, I am pissed. Jelpi had been using VIXX as a cash cow for years because for whatever reason they could never recreate the same magical process of creating a group within a niche market. Despite VIXX finding a niche market within to thrive, Jelpi stopped giving them that support long ago. And we all know SM’s reputation (for those who don’t know, SM recently acquired Jelpi).

Something that both worries and pisses me off is that SM may not so subtly told him to leave voluntarily. But as far as I know, Hongbin decided to leave, himself. But we’ll most likely never truly know. 

I think SM could see the writing on the wall. It already happened twice under the label. After all...

Once is a tragedy. Twice is a coincidence. Thrice is a statistic.

Hongbin would have been that statistic.

And really, that’s what is really making me absolutely livid. Because based on what we’ve seen and heard as fans... I can’t fucking imagine what was going on behind closed doors.

Idols are by no means perfect human begins. But they still don’t deserve this treatment. Including Hongbin.

I am proud of Hongbin so many reasons. From the very beginning, Hongbin was considered one of the weakest vocally. What that means, I don’t really know, I’m not musically trained. But he put in the effort to grow and develop himself as an idol. I mean on EAU DE VIXX, he was a fucking vocal powerhouse! He put all this effort into bettering himself as an actor, as a singer, as a dancer. And yet his company did not pay him the courtesy of that work.

I am proud of him because throughout these years, he’s been very much himself from the beginning, even though that makes him surly as hell, confrontational, sarcastic. He gave us Meme-Bin. He made us feel his pain with the cringe. He worked hard on his dream. It was never a life long dream like it was for Jaehwan. Instead, it was almost spur of the moment. And to me, being able to succeed to some degree of that sudden dream -- that is one of the greatest inspirations anyone can give.

I am proud of him for his strength. He went through years of being put in awkward positions (the Error MV for instance: he was originally suppose to kiss her on the lips and he kissed her on the forehead instead because kissing her made him uncomfortable). Years of being cast in the wrong type of role despite his skills (always cast as the ‘Prince’ type when he could have become an amazing psychotic villain). Years of his hard work being disregarded in favor of being a pretty face.

And he seemingly went through that and probably more that will never know about for years, all with that big cheesy dimpled smile. I think on some level, he’s depressed and has been for a very long time. But for the most part, like most of those who fight with their inner demons, he hid it for everyone else.

I think that during their hiatus TWITCH was his safe haven. It was a place where he could do something he loved and still interact with his ‘fans.’ And when he was asked his OPINION on a REMIX, people decided that that was enough to call for him to be cancelled. And it seems like the company listened to loudest minority. His haven was no longer safe.

I don’t know what happened behind closed doors. I think we all hoped that the company was looking to take legal action against the slander. Now, I’m wondering, did they decide to use Hongbin as a scapegoat for something? I don’t know. I don’t think we’ll ever know. 

Hongbin is NOT perfect. He is not without flaw, the same as any other human being. But I do think he’s one of the strongest people I’ve seen. 

I don’t know for certain, but I hope leaving was something he decided for himself, and not because of my fear that I said earlier. And that’s why I think he’s so strong.

I think he realized that he was in trouble. And I don’t mean with the fans or the company. I think he recognized that there were somethings were not worth paying for with his life.

I truly think that without the other five being there to help emotionally support him (with the Hyung line scattered to the wind for military service and Ravi off being a workaholic with GROOVL1N), Hongbin would not have survived. I know Hakyeon is coming back soon, but could have Hongbin held out for that much longer? 

I don’t know. 

I truly believe that if Hongbin was fighting with the company for something behind closed doors, Hakyeon and Jaehwan would have fought for him when he emotionally couldn’t stand up for himself anymore.

I am proud of Hongbin because he knew his worth. He chose to live. Leaving something that I’m sure is all consuming, that takes a lot of strength. That takes a strong sense of self worth (maybe even self love) and the will to live. 

With the world going to shit this year, it’s hard to find the good in all this. I try to be forever the optimist. And in my mind, if Hongbin really did decide to leave of his own volition, in the long run, perhaps the world is still progressing to a better place. He decided to make the tough decision now, rather than waiting until it was too much; rather than waiting until he saw no other option than to make a decision that there is absolutely no coming back from.

I’m proud that he chose his health over everything else. Even if it makes me upset to see him go.

Because honestly, VIXX isn’t going to be the same without him. 

[mxgvmiii]

100 follower special event✨✨

Hello babies🌸🌸( tis the name I have dubbed thee)!

First and foremost I would like to thank you for liking my content enough to actually follow, let alone having me reach 100 followers. I hope you keep enjoying my content in the future and keep on supporting me. I make it my mission to make sure that everyone reading my work feels loved, included and happy. That is one of the main reasons I always try to write gender neutral stories and refrain from describing physical features unless requested. I hope that in the future I am able to write for female characters as well to broaden my demographic. I hope you know that I love each an every one of guys very much.

This is the post for my 100 follower special.It took some time to figure out exactly what I wanted to do since I really wanted to something special for you all. I hope you guys enjoy this special event and bear with me since this is my first time doing this. When the event is over I’ll upload a google form that I’d appreciate if you filled out so that I know what to change when I hopefully hit another milestone.

The event will be held from the day this is posted and will continue for the whole month. Which means 4th - 31st August 2020 according to the CEST time zone. I will no longer take request starting from 11:30 pm on the 31st, seeing as I most likely won’t be able to produce something I’m proud of while on a time crunch. I probably will close it early if there aren’t that many requests since I start school in a week and have many important exams. That’s why my requests are currently closed. Everything that has to do with the special will be tagged with #100 special. My guidelines still apply during the event.

If you would like to be added to a taglist for a specific group, person, anime, character, for questions only, prompts only or everything just send me an ask or a dm :)

BTW I started writing this post at like 5:30 pm and finished at 2:12 am. ngl I wasn’t writing between 8 and 10 pm since I was busy helping my parents. That’s still a long time tho...

When the event is done:

I will link this in my masterlist.

Every prompt that is written will have a list of names next to it. Every name will be a link to the post.

I will edit the layout of this post so that my legend, that I add to every masterlist to symbolize what kind of post it is, will be there.

n e wayz😗

For my 100 special I will be making a Prompt list, a Q&A and redraws + art 

Choose a location/AU and only one prompt from the following. Please specify a genre (ex. fluff, angst, slow burn, crack, etc.) and format (headcanon, oneshot). Any combination that has already been done will be linked in the ask.

Quotes:

ngl most of the crack quotes are things my friends and I have said.

- “will you marry me?”

- “I think we need a break”

- “Where were you?”

- “I was worried, you know”

- “ You slob”

- “AGAIN??!” sigh “ At least you’re not hurt, right”

- “You are a hazard to society ... and to yourself”

- “Do I need to supervise you now?”

- “They won’t care about your left pinky toe”

- “That’s it. We’re getting you a bubble wrap suit. Oh don’t worry it’ll still be (favorite color)”

- “Honey, I’m having a baby and it’s not yours. It belongs to Jungkook” (if requested with Jungkook, the name will be changed to someone else”

- “Honey, I was lying, it’s (favorite food)’s baby”

- “How did you fall down the stairs and get bitten by a dog in the same week?”

- “When I see that old lady it’s on site”

Actions:

- ice skating

- visiting a museum (you can specify what kind of museum)

- hanging out

- waking up

- going to sleep

- wearing his clothes

- buying matching items ( you can specify)

- cooking/baking

- cleaning together

- teaching you volleyball (haikyuu only)

- teaching you one of his choreography (kpop groups only)

- filming tiktoks

- pranking him (with his friends)

Locations:

- Park

- Water park 

- Pool

- Beach

- Aquarium

- Concert

- Home

- Supermarket

- School (classroom, hallway, cafeteria, rooftop, gym)

- Holiday (here you can specify a destination)

- On the way home (bus, car, plane, train)

- Doctor’s office/clinic

- Hospital

- A volleyball match (pre and post timeskip)

- Café/restaurant/fast food restaurant

- Mall/clothing store

AUs:

- social media (celebrity ver., non-celeb ver.)

- spy/mafia

- youtuber

- Warlord (haikyuu only since it saves me the energy when making alliances and rivals/enemies. This is also loosely based off of the otome game Ikemen Sengoku.)

Haikyuu:

Karasuno:

- Sawamura Daichi - Sugawara Kōshi - Azmane Asahi - Nishinoya  Yū - Tanaka  Ryūnosuke - Kageyama Tobio - Hinata  Shōyō - Tsukishima Kei - Yamaguchi Tadashi

Nekoma:

- Kuroo Tetsurō - Kai Nobuyuki - Yaku Morisuke - Yamamoto Taketora - Kozume Kenma - Haiba Lev

Fukurodani:

- Bokuto Kōtarō - Akaashi Keiji

Shiratorizawa:

- Ushijima Wakatoshi - Semi Eita - Tendō Satori

Aoba Johsai:

- Oikawa Tōru - Matsukawa Issei - Hanamaki Takahiro - Iwaizumi Haijime

Inarizaki:

- Ojirō Aran - Miya Atsumu - Suna Rintarō - Miya Osamu

Date Tech/Dateko:

- Futakuchi Kenji - Aone Takanobu - Koganegawa Kanji

Miscellaneous Characters:

- Terushima Yūji - Sakusa Kiyoomi

Boku no Hero Academia:

Class 1a:

- Kaminari Denki - Kirishima Eijiro - Todoroki Shouto - Bakugo Katsuki - Midoriya Izuku

Class 1b:

- Shinsou Hitoshi

Free!:

- Nanase Haruka - Tachibana Makoto - Hazuki Nagisa  - Ryūgazaki Rei - Matsuoka Rin - Yamazaki Sousuke - Shinigo Kisume - Nitori Aiichiro  - Mikoshiba Momotaro - Tono Hyori - Shiina Asahi - Mikoshiba Seijuro - Kirishima Natsuya - Kirishima Ikuya

NCT:

- Taeyong - Taeil - Johnny - Yuta - Kun - Doyoung - Ten - Jaehyung - WinWin - Junwoo - Lucas - Mark - Xiaojun - Hendery - Renjun - Haechan - Jeno - Jaemin - YangYang - Chenle - Jisung

GOT7:

- JB - Mark - Jackson - Jinyoung - Youngjae - Bam Bam - Yugyeom

Seventeen:

- S.Coups - Jeonghan - Joshua - Jun - Hoshi - Wonwoo - Woozi - DK - Mingyu - The8 - Seungkwan - Vernon - Dino

BTS:

- RM - Jin - Suga - J-hope - Jimin - V - Jungkook

Stray Kids:

- BangChan - Lee Know - Chanbin - Hyungjin - Han - Felix - Sengmin - I.N

ATEEZ:

- Hongjoon - Seonghwa - Yunho - Yeosang - San - Mingi - Wooyoung - Jongho

EXO:

- Suho - Xiumin - Lay - Baekhyun - Chen - Chanyeol - D.O - Kai - Sehun

Every question that has been answered will be crossed out and linked. In brackets are if you want to specify. Yes, you can also send in some of your own questions.

1. How do you get inspiration?

2. What are your favorite genres? (music, film, books/writing)

3. Who is your bias from all of the groups you write for? 

4. What is your favorite anime? (as a ranking, why?)

5. Who is your favorite character? (Haikyuu, Bnha) 

6. When did you get into Anime / Kpop? (show, group, in general)

7. What is your favorite food?

8. Who are your favorite writers on tumblr?

9. How did you start writing?

10. What happened to make you and your friends say this?

~ 10a. “You are a hazard to society ... and to yourself”

~ 10b. “Do I need to supervise you now?”

~ 10c. “They won’t care about your left pinky toe”

~ 10d. “That’s it. We’re getting you a bubble wrap suit. Oh don’t worry it’ll still be (favorite color)”

~ 10e. “Honey, I’m having a baby and it’s not yours. It belongs to Jungkook”

~ 10f. “Honey, I was lying, it’s (favorite food)’s baby”

~ 10g. “How did you fall down the stairs and get bitten by a dog in the same week?”

~ 10h. “When I see that old lady it’s on site”

Questions you asked:

... nothing yet lol ...

This category is for Anime only.

For this portion you send me an official picture from a manga  or a scene from the anime that I redraw via dm so I can draw the right picture, if you don’t wan’t to be tagged I’ll send you the post via dm to let you know I finished it. Or if you want to see a specific character with a specific hairstyle but in the official art style.

All items will be linked below.

... nothing yet ... lol

[wildefluorescent]

ten for ten for ten

answer 10 questions, come up with 10 questions, tag 10 people to answer them

1. What was the last piece of media that made you cry? Why (optional)?

i think it was when i rewatched the episode of queer eye where they guy proposes to his girlfriend and spells her name to mean love.......

2. Do spoilers actually bother you or not? Do you ever seek them out deliberately?

lmao yes and no. now i'll elaborate. it's not as much about spoilers as it is that sometime when i consume some media where i had an idea what would happen (like the raven cycle for lack of a better example) afterwards i'll always wish i had gone in with no idea what will happen. the thing is i usually seek out the content myself before i start a book or sth which is like. marta why do u do that. but also i'm not really bothered, i can and do enjoy things even when i know how everything will turn out. i'm only really bothered when it comes to like mystery novels cause that's kind of the whole point to me. the one thing i can't get over that was spoiled to me (in the most bizarre way) is everything about sirius and peter in the prisoner of azkaban cause my librarian told me the goblet of fire was the third book and my 10yo self believed her so i read it before i read the prisoner of azkaban lmao. this was unnecessarily long fjdkfkdk

3. If you were to describe yourself using a colour palette, which colours would you use?

different shades of yellow, orange, baby blue and navy

4. If you were a fictional character, which songs would you want people to associate you with and which headcanons about you would the audiences probably make, based on your life so far?

ohhh this is an interesting one, like idk i feel it would be fun to give off vibes that could get me gifsets or moodboards of me with mcr quotes on them

5. If you were to design a card or a tarot deck, what pattern or motif would you put on the back of the cards? Would there be anything special about the deck? What would be your inspiration for the motifs?

now i'm sorry in advance cause i don't know anything about tarot. but i'd want them in the palette from question three plus some reds

6. Are there any songs that you can't listen to anymore because they remind you of someone or something too much? Would you still choose to associate the song with them if you had the chance not to?

it's not that i can't listen to it but helena by mcr and fall out boys entire discography remind me of a former very good friend but i don't really listen to it anymore so it's okay

7. Do you have any piercings? If no, are you planning on getting any? If yes, are you planning on getting more?

i have a septum piercing, also used to have four in my ears but two of them wouldn't heal so i took them out and two just disappeared cause i didn't wear earrings for almost a year and i just noticed that last week. i want one more nose piercing, am planning to do some more in my ears, and would love a lip piercing but i don't think i'm gonna get one anytime soon

8. Which/what kind of noises do you find the most soothing? Which/what kind od noises annoy you the most?

most soothing is water, most annoying is cutlery on plates and whatever sound styrofoam makes

9. Do you like reading poetry? If yes, what kind? If no, why not? (Optionally, add a poem recommendation)

i definitely enjoy writing poetry more than i enjoy reading it but i do like to read some poems from time to time. don't really have a preference ngl, nor a recommendation sorry

10. Which fictional characters would you say influenced your personal development the most, if any?

david from druck lately, piglet from winnie the pooh ron and hermione when i was a kid

my questions:

1. If you had the chance to reconsume any book, film, show, poem, anything, without knowing anything about it, what would it be? Why?

2. What is something you’ve learned in the last couple of years that’s most enjoyable to you?

3. Describe your ideal day off/weekend.

4. What’s your favourite scent of a candle?

5. If you could  see one thing behind your window every day after waking up, what would it be?

6. What is something special about someone you love?

7. Do you prefer lined, checkered, dotted or plain paper? Why?

8. Do you have any tattoos? Do you want any?

9. You publish the book you’ve always dreamed of publishing. Did you imagne it with hardcover or paperback? What colours do you see on the cover? Do you know what kind of book it would be?

10. What song do you have stuck in your head now?

thank you for tagging me @see-it-all-so-clear <3 

i’m tagging @vlindervin7 @nbronan @jewishdavid @amiras-bitch @247-series @dana-song @muscosus @losojitos @imalmostmeagain @floraflorenzi but no pressure yall <3 

[janiedean]

11/11/11 meme!

tagged by @aviss ty!

1. Favorite OC to write?

That I’ve done in fanfic? The guy I hooked jon c. with in and give all the love you have in your soul, but I liked doing the theater company in the amnesiac jaime fic as well.

2. Dialogue or Descriptions?

... neither/midway bc my favorite thing to do is writing people being crushed by their own feelings so I guess introspection? anyway if I have to pick dialogue but bc describing shit in another language takes a lot more effort than dialogue xD

3. Favorite plot twist?

in other people’s writing/movies? for books prob. lady stoneheart, for other media... THE CASABLANCA ENDING GUYS I mean it’s not a plot twist but you feel me

4. Favorite Cliche?

you know those old 30s/40s romcoms where the two leads either start bickering or stare at each other from second #1 and it’s obvious they’re Meant To Be but it doesn’t happen until the last five minutes and they spend all the time trading actually good banter and/or one of them flirts and the other doesn’t quite get it? that. but I like the old movies flair of it more than recent romcoms tbh.

if you meant to write... that’s probably the same lmao

5. Favorite season?

summer. which is why I’m devastated it’s ending xD

6. Writing by hand or on a computer/phone?

I hate writing on the phone, longhand is okay and better to figure things out but computer is more efficient/faster so I’ll take computer.

7. Music while writing?

yes absolutely. guys 90% of what I write is music-based anyway so I’ll listen to whatever’s inspiring me at the moment, if not if I don’t have background music I can’t do shit. like at all.

8. Weirdest thing you’ve ever been inspired by?

.... brexit, probably.

or very OOT online description of sex toys, but I haven’t written that fic yet.

9. Biggest no-no for a book? What will immediately make you put the book down if you see it?

unless it’s like an adult book written by adults for adults I’ll dislike 90% of any child/teenager POV especially in YA which is a genre I avoid as much as I can - I have a few exceptions but I can’t read stuff aimed at teens most of the time and when I was a kid I hated books with people my age being the pov anyway. also i have a... very specific taste for humor so if I read something that’s supposed to feel witty or be witty and it doesn’t line up with my concept of it I’m out.

10. What titles grab your attention in bookstores?

idk I grab from most sides XD lately I’ve ended up with more nonfiction than usual but ngl if I like the cover or the title or if it looks like a thing I’d be interested in I’ll check it out.

11. Can you describe the color purple in one sentence?

... the color of the sky just before the sun is completely set?

tagging hmm @randomingoftherandomness @lordhellebore @aliveanddrunkonsunlight and whoever else wants to :)

[dokidokiliteraturegirls]

 Hello everyone! Yui here, with today’s special feature, DDLitG Behind the Scenes: What’s the deal with Ako?

In this special update we’ll talk about her character in general, design, her place in the story, and more! So get comfortable in your seat, get yourself some good snacks, and let’s delve into the background of DDLitG’s 1st-ish original character~

Who is Ako?

Ako, formerly known as “female student”, was originally one of the many NPCs used by the game’s engine to fill its world with nondescript background characters, so as to make it feel less empty. However, Sayori took a special interest in her, and decided to befriend her, following the steps of a young MC who befriended Sayori in a similar situation and ended up saving her life. This would in turn allow Ako to grow as a character beyond her 1 line of coding and get her own sprites, as well as being able to interact with the world. She would later go on to fall in love with Sayori and shenanigans ensue.

Ako was created with the purpose of telling the story of the Friendship arc.

Designing Ako.

Let me make one thing clear: I’m not a character designer. I don’t know jack about it besides the very basics. But I did try to make someone who looked mildly original and, most importantly, different from the other girls.

Originally, she was going to be the image of a shy, fragile girl who Sayori befriended out of pity, more than anything. Based on this initial idea, I made this beta Ako design on one of my copybooks when I should’ve been working:

As you can see, her very first sprite was the one where she’s shyly looking away to avoid eye contact (and to seem annoying, but more on that later). I was happy with the pose but not with her face, as it looked super unoriginal. She resembled Ochako Uraraka from My Hero Academia a bit too much, so I tried to change her hair to make her stand out more. Here is her second iteration:

This time, I felt like I cranked it up too much to the other side. Now she stood out TOO much. Her hair felt like it came more from a protagonist than someone who’s supposed to be a background character. I adopted a new philosophy after seeing this result: she had to look as bland as possible. She had to be the kind of character you see all the time in the background of an anime - those simple, unassuming designs you’d never look twice at because you’re too focused on the protagonists with candy-coloured hair. In DDLitG’s canon she’s a filler NPC brought to the forefront, and her design had to reflect that more than my desire to make her look “cool”.

With this in mind, we come to Ako v0.3

As you can see, this is much closer to her current design. But this was still a sketch (even the drawing above is very much unfinished). As you can see, I got closer to her 0.1 version with the hair, but changed the eyes to make them look more unique, giving her that more neutral, “nothing” expression. Having finally found some ground I was comfortable with, I redefined her design a little further, gave her some more details around the hair and clothes, adjusted the proportions of her body (because apparently I draw heads huge), and made her finalized design.

I was happy.

What’s with this sassy... monochrome child?

If there’s one constant to be found in the pictures above, is that she was always meant to be black and white. There are plenty of reasons, which I’ll list because, honestly, there are a lot.

1. I didn’t want to look her like the rest of the cast at fucking all. She is an OC introduced in a story with already established characters made by a much more talented writer. She’s an outsider, someone who doesn’t belong with this cast of colorful characters, and I wanted readers to be able to tell that at first glance. No, she’s not like the other girls. They don’t belong in the same place. She is not a member of the original DDLC cast, and it shows.

2. I know I can’t draw as well as Satchely, so trying to copy DDLC’s art style would just end up looking awkward and wrong. I had no choice but to do my own thing. And if I’m doing my own thing, why not take it all the way? I already gave myself artistic freedom, I might as well go crazy with it~

3. I just adore characters in a fictional universe that look different from the rest of the cast or have some strange design choice for literally no reason. Like Krillin from Dragonball, with his eyes that make him look like he belongs in an entirely different manga...

...or even Jotaro Kujo, whose hat merges with his hair because why not!

I live for dumb crap like that.

4. A huuuuuge inspiration for me while writing (besides my own uninteresting life) is music. Many times I listen to a specific track or imagine situations with specific background music to make them seem more real, and be able to better portray the feelings of a scene when writing [For example, I listened to My Chemical Romance’s Welcome to the Black Parade a lot while writing Monika’s Death].

Ako’s creation was no exception. Her appearance was partially based on the cover for not only one of my favorite Vocaloid albums of all time, but one of my favorite albums period: Wowaka’s glorious Unhappy Refrain.

I’ve been writing stuff based on this album alone for years because it’s just so damn striking to me. The picture of the faceless schoolgirl falling into the unseen abyss, the background uninterested characters that imply they are used to seeing fellow girls suffer, the distorted world they live in, the album’s way to explore teenage depression, the freaking name of the album, EVERYTHING! IT’S SUCH A GOOD EXPLORATION OF THE DIFFICULT LIFE TEENS FACE THAT OFTEN GOES UNNOTICED!! AAAAAAHHHH IT’S SO GOOD.

5. Ako was also based on a previous design I made for another character meant for an original visual novel I was writing and I’m probably never going to finish, who was also going to be monochromatic to reference this album (in that context it made more sense though cuz every character was a musical reference).

This character, in turn, was based on Monoko from Yume Nikki, which is more obvious because of her crying eye and extra arm.

So basically at this point it would’ve been weird if I hadn’t made her monochromatic.

Naming Ako

This was one of the most difficult parts, ngl.

As I mentioned, Ako was originally going to be a fragile, shy girl. Based on this, her original name during the design face was Moromi, which is one more letter than “Moroi”, which Google translate promises me means “Brittle” or “Fragile” in Japanese.

However, after the philosophy change that happened during her conceptual stage, “Fragility” was no longer at the core of her character, as it was now “Nothingness/Blandness”. Because of this, I changed her name to “Ako”.

Many people have submitted their interpretations of the name, ranging from its meaning “To teach/to learn”, and “To yearn for”, which all fit better than the original tbh.

The intended meaning is for “Ako” to be read as “A-Ko”, which is a way by which Japenese media often refers to filler characters, as it translates to “Girl A”.

Examples of this can be seen in Super Danganronpa 2, where a character in a videogame is called “A-Ko” to hide their identity...

...and in a movie called “Project A-ko”, which was a parody of the anime tropes from the time, so they gave the protagonist the most generic name ever. The antagonist and side character, by the way, are called “B-Ko” and “C-Ko” respectively. This movie is fucking awesome.

This name also made sense in the context of the story, because we already had a character named “Student A”, so this goes to show that the game just gave Ako the default name it had stored for female NPCs.

Blinded Ako, or How I Learned to Convey Emotion Through Ahegao

When I came up with Ako, she was meant to have most of her character revolving around her infatuation with Sayori. She was, after all, written in the story with the purpose of falling in love with her, and nothing else. Her character, personality, likes/dislikes, and hobbies came afterwards. As the story progressed, however, I decided that she should have a personality separate from just being in love with another character. So to separate the actions she committed under the influence of her passion, I did a little design change in the middle of the arc: Blinded Ako.

In this version, Ako has been literally blinded by love and stops being rational. This is represented by the hearts covering her eyes, and clouding her judgement. This was done not only with the purpose of representing she was past her breaking point, but also to differentiate the Ako that makes mistakes with the Ako that was introduced in the beginning of the arc. Almost so as to make them two different characters, so when she is reintroduced as a regular character after Friendship, readers could think “oh, she’s not going to do dumb stuff again, she’s not blinded by love anymore.”

Many people compared the above panel with “ahegao”, a trope in hentai manga where a character does a silly face to represent them breaking from enjoying themselves so much. This was done partially on purpose. The main idea was to represent Ako being blinded by her infatuation for Sayori, not to equate her sate of being with anything sexual. It DID end up looking more hentai-esque than I expected though, as, well, Ako is in black and white, and the heart eyes are also a trope in ahegao. And she’s sweating. And she’s saying that she’s about to break....

.....

....well at least I drove my point home.

Ako’s musical influences

Above I mentioned how music was a big part of my inspiration, and how I listened to Welcome to the Black Parade while writing Monika’s Death, so the question in no one’s mind is: what music did Yui use as inspiration for Ako’s character and the arc? 🤔

Well, hypothetical reader, the answer is that since Ako was meant to be bland and flavour-free, her original depiction is not based on a song or anything. Her desperation towards Sayori and Blinded Ako, though, are based on TRONICBOX’s 80′s style remix of Ariana Grande’s Into You. And yes, this 80′s remix in specific. Not the original song. I highly encourage you to give it a listen and pay attention to the lyrics if you want an insight into how Ako was feeling during her breaking point.

Also, as a side note, no one has asked me this, but I imagine Ako’s voice to sound like the vocals of Panty and Stocking’s ending, Fallen Angel. It’s a truly beautiful song, and once again, I highly encourage you to give it a listen and pay attention tot he lyrics if you want an insight in Ako’s current feelings towards Sayori.

Ako’s reception

This is more something personal than an explanation of the character, but it’s something I want to share nonetheless.

Remember when I said Ako was meant to be annoying? Yeah... xD

When I decided to add a new character I did so under the idea that everyone was going to hate her, because it’s a purposefully boring OC made by some insane person with the sole purpose of being added to an already interesting and loved cast of characters just to fuck everything up.

The first scene I ever wrote for Ako was the part where Monika asked if she had hurt Sayori, and she said “Not intentionally...” while looking away, which is why her first sprite ever was in that position. She was meant to make people feel frustrated over this girl just looking away from her problems and avoiding responsibility, while also telling Monika to her face that she had done something bad to Sayori. Readers were expected to hate her. That’s why in the beginning she says she doesn’t like literature, to assure you that she’s not joining the literature club. That’s why there’s a scene where she gets punched in the face. That’s why she looks so extremely out of place.

YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO DISLIKE HER!! omg I’m still surprised at how warm the reception was, you guys are just too nice for me~ ❤️

Because of the unexpected reception I had to change some parts of the arc, which were originally going to be much crueler towards her [I even questioned adding the punch at all, but it was an important part of Monika’s development so I felt it]. I also established her as a recurring character in spite of her dislike of literature, and did my best to make her less hate-able than she was originally going to be, even cutting some planned lines of dialogue that made her pretty irredeemable. Looking back, I am glad I did those changes, we ended up with a well-liked and pretty nice girl because of it~

Final thoughts

The introduction of Ako and writing Friendship in general was a very intense experience for me. It was very difficult to balance Ako as being both relevant to the story and moving the plot forward, but not make her the sole focus of everything and have her obscure everyone else, because OCs in established pieces of media tend to do that.

This arc also got a LOT of mixed reviews, some people liking it, some hating everything I did. This made me really question what I was doing and at many points even regret I was writing Friendship at all. At a certain point I lost almost 50 followers in a single update.

I also had trouble writing some parts because they were too sad. And that’s not my style! I like writing happy people being good friends, damn it, not everyone crying and hating each other.

But when all is said and done, I’m happy I wrote both Friendship and Ako into the story. I’ve received many wonderful, supportive messages telling me how much readers enjoyed it. Even some people saying they had been in a similar situation to the one depicted in the story, and were glad to see a story that showed a positive outcome.

Will I write more OCs into DDLitG?

Meh, who knows. I love writing more original stuff and expanding the world of DDLitG, but I also feel like if I introduce yet another OC, people will crucify me and hate me for flooding the story with too much stuff that’s irrelevant to the DDLC they’re used to. That being said, writing this blog is my first, and very possibly last chance to expose my stories to such a large audience. And seeing people like what you do not only because you’re riding the coattails of a recognizable brand, but because they like what you do with it, makes me pretty darn happy. Being completely honest, I’d like to add another character. But just one. And only if it’s something that will push both the story and the girls’ character arcs forward. Not just adding OCs for the sake of it.

Thanks for sticking until the end of this BTS, and I hope you found it an enjoyable read, or at the very least I made you a little bit less bored~ ❤️

Next time, in DDLitG Behind the scenes: What’s the deal with The Perfect Yuri?