#ngl i wish this. was not what it is.

[septembersghost]

Before I begin I must say I am a swiftie.

I love Taylor. Her music means a lot to me. It literally helped me in a lot of ways. But her recent actions have actually genuinely is upsetting to me(not saying she has to live the way I want her to but I feel really sad). Its just........he is a very disgusting person. He is someone who was literally m@********* in public and made misogynistic comments.

My biggest fury with him was when he called harry a queerbaiter. It was extra hard for me because harry's acceptance was what made me feel peace about my sexuality. I am still figuring out my sexuality and it's mostly fluctuating. He was the first person I saw say 'you dont have to tick every box'. He said that when I was questioning myself for the 100th time. Because if you want to come out to everyone you need a label right! He made me realise it's okay to not know everything and it felt like a warm hug from a friend. And watching M@** ***** call that person a 'queerbaiter' angered me to extreme and 'almost' destroyed my self esteem wondering whether everyone around me thought I was faking for attention too. I know him and Taylor have been friends for a long time but her being romantically linked with someone like that and being so carefree about it while he has been linked to 100th warranted controversy makes me feel sick in the stomach. It makes me wonder if she's like 'I know the things he said/did but I don't care ' and it hurts me so much to even think she feels that way. I know she is a good person and all that but.....the Taylor who made me feel accepted about being the odd kid in the school or the one who understood about my fear of growing up seems so far away. I feel so hurt by the fact that I am feeling this. I think I need to take a distance from her and her art and I don't know how long will that be.

Sorry if I bothered you with such a long paragraph but I feel you can understand this better than anyone here

hi love, i apologize it took me all day to answer this! so i'm going to be honest, i've been thinking about this specific situation ever since the first rumor surfaced, but i didn't address it since i know it sounds like fan-based bias, even though to me it's a larger issue than that.

let me digress for a moment - i've seen a lot of his fans try to defend the n*zi salute as "satire," and that it wasn't meant to be antisemitic, but as a jewish person, i find this deeply troubling, because, even as edgy ~performance art~, using such a direct symbol of hate is never okay (in conjunction with a lyric referencing someone who's been virulently antisemitic in public - and yes, the lyric itself is satirical criticism, but the combination of the two is unsettling, to say the least). it's concerning and it's hurtful and it's inappropriate, full stop. his non-apologies for his grossly racist and sexist comments are as well.

his antics onstage (i have to laugh at the raw steak thing somehow being a criticism of "toxic masculinity"...bro. what?) also cross a line from being performance art to being. ick. (UGH i'd forgotten that other incident you mentioned because it's gross and i blocked it from my memory. just. WHY!!!)

in truth, i had no idea who he was and had never even heard his name (though i was aware of the 1975, i never listened to them) until their album came out last year and suddenly he was spouting off everywhere and doing things and fans began to speak about the old rumors of he and taylor (which i dismissed out of hand, but now. idk). everything i've learned since has been against my will tbh.

which brings us to that awful queerbaiting comment. if you've followed me for any length of time, you know this is a particular hot button issue of mine, i just get incensed at the way that term is misused and weaponized against real people, and harry gets it in a particularly disgusting way because certain sections of the internet seem to feel a superiority complex in tearing him down for existing. never once has harry claimed to be a bastion of queerness or a trailblazer of fashion, and yet he's criticized for...what exactly? being himself? dressing however one chooses without being boxed in by gender expectations is exactly what we're meant to be aiming for, isn't it? not demanding someone's label and identity is supposed to be part of championing the community, isn't it? his choice to remain unlabeled matters. not only because it's no one's business but his own, but also because BEING an unlabeled/mspec person IS itself a whole identity. what matty said about this was appalling and WAY over the line, and particularly disrespectful since they're supposedly friendly. he had no right to make the comments that he did. he should've received more criticism for it than he did (and had he attacked anyone but harry, he probably would have).

(i wish what adam lambert said in response had gotten more traction. Automatically labeling looks and performances that aren’t cisheteronormative as queerbait is “almost underestimating the intelligence of gay people.”)

you feeling enraged and hurt by that is understandable, and you have every right to feel that way. it touches my heart to read that harry has helped you feel more at peace with your sexuality. i've mentioned before that i've grappled with what exactly mine is too and where i fall on whatever spectrum, and just the idea that we don't even HAVE to put a concrete definition on that, or that it's allowed to be fluid, is a relief. i also feel like there's a huge amount of bias where people forget that just because you haven't been in a relationship with someone of ___ identity/gender doesn't mean your own identity isn't real! you DON'T have to tick every box, and you ARE allowed to expand or change along the way, and you're still you and still valid! nobody has to have one set label forever, and nobody else is owed that explanation from you!

He made me realise it's okay to not know everything and it felt like a warm hug from a friend. 🥺💕💕💕 this is so sweet and i feel confident he would be touched by it too.

i am SO sorry that what matty said hurt you the way that it did, it was a reckless, thoughtless thing of him to say, and you and every other person who is working out their identity or who feels confident remaining unlabeled deserves better than him cruelly running his mouth. (which i also think had a level of jealousy in it, because, let's be honest here - he's never going to be harry, success-wise, and he also admitted harry declined to perform at his show, so). matty has frustrated and upset me on multiple occasions since i became aware of his behavior, and you're allowed to feel that way.

regarding taylor, as i said earlier, of course we have no control nor input over what she does or who she associates with, and much as we may love her, she is just a flawed human being too and she has made mistaken choices, and has overlooked behavior from others that perhaps she shouldn't have, or that we wouldn't ourselves, but only she can make those decisions for her life. i've seen a lot of disgust and concern over this on my dash, and i'm with everyone on all of that, but at the same time i think it's a bit of a wake-up call that she is her own autonomous woman whom we do not know personally, and we have to find our own ways to approach that boundary. if that means ignoring this until it blows over, if that means taking space away from her for a while, if that means making silly jokes. i think as long as we're not harassing others (which you would never! <3 but the uptick in cruel anons/death threats that have happened this past month make me sad and i wish everyone could take a breath and...not do that!), however we choose to deal with it is the best we can do. i tend to suspect she's been going through it, and maybe this won't last long, but that doesn't make it a great look nor is it unconcerning. regardless, you should do what's best for yourself and look out for your well-being. if that means detaching for a while, i promise it doesn't make you a bad fan, even though i know that hurts ("the Taylor who made me feel accepted about being the odd kid in the school or the one who understood about my fear of growing up seems so far away." though i'm older than you, this happened to me in my own sense during my 1989 disconnect. i really do get it, and seeing a similar pattern here is a bit painful). i also want to say that i think, knowing what we do know about her and her character and kindness, she'd still want you to feel accepted and loved, and wouldn't align with the trashy things he's said and done, but i understand why willingness to overlook it hurts as well.

thank you for confiding in me and letting this out, i know it's hard to talk about and feeling distanced from an artist with such meaning to you is a specific ache. the only advice i can give you is to step back however you need to, for however long you need to. whether you feel comfortable still holding onto her music but separating from her personally (and/or from tour), or whether you need space from all of it for a while, remember that it's always going to be there, and you can always come back. in the meantime, you can also turn to places and artists that are continuing to give you comfort (like harry, and i'm so glad he is that for you).

for what it's worth, i love you and i know your identity is worthwhile, and YOU are worthwhile, and you deserve to feel safe and embraced and seen. anywhere you go, you don't need a reason. 💛💛💛

[rika-mortis]

Bonus:

[arnaerr]

Rellana, Twin Moon Knight & Rennala, Queen of the Full Moon

prints ✦ full process on patreon

[sforzesco]

DO NOT BE AFRAID

this is combining Ovid's Heroides and the Excidium Troie because I can't stop thinking of Hermes telling him not to be afraid. what the fuck!! Ares is wearing the crown that Paris gave him.

I have. thoughts. about Paris. he's almost got this Troilos parallel in my mind, that the event that defines him in detail exists in a lost narrative that we don't have (the Cypria), but everyone else knew. the event that defines Troilos is his death (murdered, butchered by Achilles, the violence of which haunts everything after. Achilles, child killer, you can't escape that!), and the event that defines Paris is the Judgement. what's a lost text but a kind of grave!!

idk I don't think that Paris before the Judgement would recognize himself after bc when you become god touched, it rearranges your guts. you become transformed in the worst way possible! how could you recognize yourself! but I also think that all the Parises after the Judgement would recognize each other because that event is so locked into the trauma of war and the scar it leaves on the land, it's like a scar on the narrative too. it exists like this forever, over and over again, so you exist like that forever too. Troy collects grief and despairs.

Troy as trauma: Reflections on intergenerational transmission and the locus of trauma, Andromache Karanika

and Paris is like. a miserable little god/corpse-puppet or something, like a match for the gods to throw onto gasoline.

The Excidium Troie + Ovid's Heroides:

Excidium Troie, trans. Muhammad Syarif Fadhlurrahman

Ovid, Heroides 16 (trans. Harold Isbell)

a collection of things regarding Paris that made me go 😬 but under a cut bc this is getting. very long.

The Divine Twins in Early Greek Poetry, Corolla Torontonensis

Iliad 24 and the Judgement of Paris, C.J. Mackie

Elegy and Epic and the Recognition of Paris: Ovid "Heroides" 16, Elizabeth Forbis Mazurek

Ennian Influence in "Heroides" 16 and 17, Howard Jacobson

Paris/Alexandros in the "Iliad", I. J. F. de Jong

[deadmothsketches]

My take on that one magazine these guys did.

[jannecapelleart]

anyway so this is something a bit more cheerful bc ngl his face was so funny in this scene. also someone said its the same face that one meme cat is doing and theyre right.

[cherrywhite]

Okay some of these I had written down before chapter 43 but I finally found the time to sit down and make a bingo sheet for the last few episodes. Ranging from Legitimate Predictions to Things I Want to Happen to You Know What? Sure 🤠

Template if anyone wants to make one of their own:

[r0semultiverse]

MOMMY SORRY MOMMY SORRY MOMMY-😳

my soul is all yours 😳👉👈

[dreamsy990]

something about the erasure of platonic love in fandom bothers me. maybe its just that im aroace, maybe i just dont 'get' the differences between loving and being in love. but it bothers me.

[priscirat]

it would be helpful to have a sign showing me the right way. would it show me the right way ?

[ganondoodle]

just saw more on twitter about the stupid book and apparently theres a "timeline update" and supposedly hylia made the stupid magic pebbles

yeah sure, say whatever you want, theres no saving this shit anymore, lore down the drain yeehaaawww

one of my biggest fears before totk came out was that it would screw not only botw lore up but also mess with existing lore, and i hate to be right on that part, id much prefer if theyd leave whatever shit they invent as being something new and not something that has "totally always existed", they clearly dont care about lore consistency, why do they keep trying to connect things afterwards anyway

....... if im being honest, i was surprised but glad that the game didnt actually end up killing my passion for the franchise even if it made me struggle for a good while

but

the stupid book might. and im being serious.

i really just want to throw everything zelda related i ever made or bought away right now, it will only get worse from here and the sooner i can stop caring the better

"that sounds unhealthy" oh you dont say?? i am mentally ill, in fact, the passion that an obsession like that brings with it can turn into some really ugly distress, i am aware of it, i do fucking wish i could just stop caring about lore and timelines and find something else, but i cant, thats not how this works, just bc i am aware of how stupid this is doesnt mean i can change anything about it, i feel what i feel

[sophfandoms53]

Nothing else matters except seeing Loona starting to embrace Blitz as a her dad🥹

[chocochiptrip]

ok hear me out

[gravitysoda]

Relief.

[moonchild-in-blue]

Guys.

So the other day I thought it would be fun (??) to go through Sleep Token's twitter (yeah yeah, I know, evil site) and I had to share this here.

Listen, I LOVE the way they talk so Cryptic™ and Eloquent™ - for some reason this one just made me laugh so, so much.

Man's really said VORE with his full chest, I love it.

[lopposting]

I have the feeling that originally, earlier in development, P was supposed to die at the end.

(Or, About more than a year after the official release,

the headcanon that changed everything for me.)

So the ending I'm talking about is this, the Rise of P ending.

But what really made me think this is this event in 2022. (people back then correctly guessed might be one of the endings or the ending of the game. Taking from this post here)

At G-Star Neowiz booth in 2022, there was a promotional statue of the Saintess statue in the game, except the figurine of the puppet is strangely suspended, as if it's literally ascending to heaven. The post writer also notes even then that the figurine looks like P. (The literal Rise of P)

There's also some footage of the figure here: (around 1:16)

The symbolism seems very very apparent, as though Neowiz were spoiling their own game two years before release. Not only is the figure literally ascending to a higher plane (imagery often associated with death), the statue itself is an inference to a famous statue of Mary mourning the death of her son. The writer of an article covering Neowiz's section at the event also notes that the ascending figure looks like P, and that it has a feeling of melancholy.

Beginning and End

Around the time of the release I think what was going around was that Rise was being considered as the "true" ending. It's interpretably the best possible outcome of the game, but I feel like it's also because it made the most sense thematically (the puppet -> Human ending, and the saintess statue being foreshadowed earlier). But P's collapse at the end was also widely (mis)interpreted as his death. And I think that's also because, in a way, it makes the most sense thematically. Puppet awakens in the train, goes on an adventure, and then sacrifices himself for who woke him up in the first place, it's just narratively a very classic and might I say standard thing to do in that very traditional, circular sort of storytelling sensibility.

However, we know that the truth is that P has fallen asleep (a human act). It is still his death in some sorts - but he's leaving a past behind and it's his "rebirth" that is being emphasized now.

And then it hit me.

I don't know if P knows that he will survive reviving Sophia.

Keeping in mind that if P was originally supposed to die - I think the entire end sequence of ROP and the overall tone of it makes SO MUCH sense to me now.

Sophia brings a lone puppet to life in the train, he is animated, listening, fighting. At the end of his journey, so much has changed - but to return her favour perhaps, truly human at heart, he returns her life to her, and then - returns to back to stillness. It’s just a narratively very tight and circular thing to do in a traditional storytelling sense, especially when you consider a kind of tragic korean media sensibility that might have influenced the country in which this studio is based out of. (Film critic Roger Ebert once suggested that he had not yet seen a happy korean film.)

I am not an expert on the Korean cinema, which is considered in critical circles as one of the most creative in the world (“Oldboy” won the Grand Jury Prize at Cannes 2004). I can say that of the Korean films I’ve seen, only one (“The YMCA Baseball Club”) did not contain extraordinary sadomasochism.  "Oldboy" review (2005)

Not to mention... Since release, I've always felt like there was this strange feeling of sadness, of melancholy, permeating throughout the entire game. Of course, we're walking through a destroyed city, but still. And I was glad that that didn't seem lost on other people:

We know that Sophia is able to turn back the clock for our main character, but turning back time is Sophia's ability, and it's possible that she can't just revive anyone once that part of her that animated him was returned back to her. Okay, maybe it's a little contrived - but that hardly matters when audiences can often overlook these things for the sake of a story making a statement. Besides, remembering that P could not even wake up without Sophia's help in the first place, it's possible that for whatever reason, he cannot sustain life on his own. In his POV this might very well be his final act.

Another thing to keep in mind is that P has just lost his father. He's witnessed Polendina's death, Antonia's death, etc., in a string of major losses throughout the game's final arc. We see him mourn over his dad but in the ROP ending it will then cut straightaway to the balcony scene. Regardless of how much time has actually passed, Geppetto's death is the scene right before this one. I don't mean to suggest that this act was one of pure self-destruction, but it is something that we as the audience can't help but feel affects him and the decision we are seeing now.

There's a certain gravitas to the way he's walking towards her that in the released version isn't unjustified, but the tone of the entire sequence has so much conviction and sombreness that it came across as a little odd to me in retrospect. And I also think this is why others might have (mis)interpreted the ending as "he died", because of the tone of this scene. But in line with the game's themes - I remember that often, it's the intent that matters. And if he doesn't know that he's going to survive this, and this is what he chooses is his final act, for all intents and purposes, it IS him sacrificing himself to save Sophia.

Re-contextualizing it this way, I think the balcony scene was maybe originally meant to be him choosing to look at Krat one last time. I definitely think that was the implication now.

P's blue butterfly flying away (his spirit leaving him). I used to think this blue butterfly represented Sophia, but now I feel like it represents P ? as I don't think we ever see this specific blue butterfly anywhere else in the game. [maybe a reach I dunno]

To be honest - when LOP first came out, up until about a week, I really did think he was dead. I was honestly pretty sad about it, but in equal parts I was sort of really impressed that Neowiz would have the guts to kill off their breadwinner straight away [I WANT TO WRITE ABOUT THIS TOO AHH]

So if this ending was originally written to be P's demise, I wonder why the powers that be would have rolled that back. Presumably they need him alive for some sort of future franchise instalment? Maybe they genuinely thought it was just too sad? But there is one thing that doesn't change, and it's what P doesn't know.

The truth is what you make it, I suppose.

Who are you? Are you a puppet or a human being?