#ngl I got got by my own agenda the other day

[emry-stars-art]

Hi i love your fat Andrew art insanely much. It's so cool. It helps me feel valid.

[megistusdiary]

𝙢𝙮 𝙜𝙚𝙣𝙨𝙝𝙞𝙣 𝙛𝙖𝙫𝙚𝙨 + 𝙢𝙮 𝙛𝙖𝙫𝙚 𝙠𝙞𝙣𝙠𝙨

𝘧𝘦𝘢𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨: 𝘥𝘦𝘩𝘺𝘢, 𝘺𝘦𝘭𝘢𝘯, 𝘢𝘳𝘭𝘦𝘤𝘤𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘰, 𝘻𝘩𝘰𝘯𝘨𝘭𝘪, 𝘳𝘰𝘴𝘢𝘳𝘪𝘢, 𝘸𝘳𝘪𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘴𝘭𝘦𝘺, & 𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘨𝘶𝘢𝘯𝘨

i was bored and thinking about some of my faves...so i put together a list of my favorite kinks and sorted my faves into them <3

this is quite long, a bit of a doozy, and very self-indulgent

i am also open to discussion or any thoughts on these or other things...teehee

warnings: 18+ content (mdni), dom and switch characters only, no implied reader gender!

mentions of: asphyxiation, size/strength kink, bondage, praise, degradation, marking, breeding kink

𝘢𝘴𝘱𝘩𝘺𝘹𝘪𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯

giving

arlecchino, yelan, wriothesley, rosaria

i think arlecchino likes to have complete obedience. but, she also just loves the feeling of her hand on your throat, feeling every little sound through the vibrations, every swallow and gulp. and, of course, all the trust you put into her when you let her grip your throat.

yelan...especially with leashes and collars. she's wrapping it tighter around her fist and yanking. hard.

wriothesley's got big, beautiful hands perfect for your neck. he's also one of the ones who really appreciates how much you trust him with this.

rosaria would probably like the feeling of power ngl. her claws leave little indents or scratches in your skin, unless she is merciful and removes them beforehand.

recieving

wriothesley, zhongli

sorry, i'm on my switch zhongli/wriothesley agenda here guys.

wrio probably loves being controlled just as much as controlling so wrap your hands around his neck and he is gone

zhongli would probably worry too much about hurting you to go as far as putting his hand on your neck...but he would love it if you did it to him (if you really did hurt him, he's an archon, and he will just move you)

𝘴𝘪𝘻𝘦/𝘴𝘵𝘳𝘦𝘯𝘨𝘵𝘩 𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘬

zhongli, wriothesley, dehya, arlecchino

dragon zhongli loves feeling big compared to you, i think.

wriothesley is huge, as we all know. he would love to just drape himself over you, completely covering you and pressing you down with his weight.

dehya's a merc who wields a claymore constantly. i just KNOW she's buff and has abs...idc what the in-game model says, they lie!! and she loves to use her strength to her advantage

arlecchino is a harbinger, and was ready to take down an archon, so i just know she's strong

𝘣𝘰𝘯𝘥𝘢𝘨𝘦

giving

yelan, ningguang, zhongli, wriothesley

once again...yelan with leashes and collars

ningguang i could see being really into shibari and tying you up super pretty like a little gift for her on her bed/desk

zhongli would also probably be into really intricate bondage on you, makes his dragon brain think of you like some treasure for his hoarde

wrio and handcuffs...come on

receiving

wriothesley, dehya

wrio and handcuffs...it goes both ways

dehya gives me switch vibes, too. she would LOVE it if you tied her hands down while you took control

𝘱𝘳𝘢𝘪𝘴𝘦 vs 𝘥𝘦𝘨𝘳𝘢𝘥𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯

likes to give praise

arlecchino, zhongli, wriothesley, dehya, ningguang

arlecchino 100% treats you so well...i know they say she's crazy, but she's only crazy because she would do anything for her own reasons...and if you are important to her, she would do anything for you!!! (i'm delusional)

zhongli definitely likes to give praise...you're just so sweet to him, how could he not?

wrio seems like the type to praise you often. he deals with horrible people and criminals all day, and it gets so exhausting being so tough all the time

dehya likes to praise, but also be teasing about it. she likes it when you get embarrassed over her being sweet on you

when you behave, ningguang will shower you with gifts and praise for being such a good partner

likes to recieve praise

wriothesley, zhongli, dehya

just call wriothesley a good boy...i know he likes it

zhongli was definitely used to all the praise he received for years as an archon, and even now, people talk him up. they respect him, obviously. but you're the one he seeks for respect from the most. give it to him, and he will melt.

i just think dehya likes to be told how much you love her. tell her every little thing you love about her.

degrader

rosaria, yelan, ningguang

oh, i just know rosaria's calling you a bunch of names, saying filthy stuff while she has you doing exactly what she wants. she knows you love it, and it gives her an outlet to release her stress and frustration. she might be so so mean, but you're guaranteed to be a fucked out mess at the end

yelan just wants to see you break before her very eyes. the sky is the limit, and she will push past it into space just to have you all embarrassed and falling over yourself to please her

remember how i said she likes praise when you're good? well when you're bad, ningguang pulls out all the stops. no gifts, no nice words, no nice treatment; that's only for when you behave appropriately. when you're naughty, she's probably taking you right over her desk, and all of her degrading words are said so loudly everyone can hear it and she loves it

degradee

wriothesley

i know wrio is all alone here, but i just think he's that type of switch!! he would love it if you hold him down (even if you're much smaller/weaker than him) and just call him filthy names. bonus points if you put a 'my' before anything you say...

𝘮𝘢𝘳𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨

giving

rosaria, yelan, wriothesley, zhongli, arlecchino, ningguang, dehya

rosaria likes leaving lipstick marks, scratches, hickies, bruises, you name it. she loves seeing them on you the next day. she wants everyone to see, but nobody should dare ask any questions~!

yelan leaves lipstick marks all over you...she loves leaving hickies all over your neck and shoulders too. you're all hers.

wriothesley is a big guy, unless he's treating you like glass, he's probably gonna leave some bruises. once you tell him you like it though...it's all fair game. definitely a biter too!!

as we know, zhongli and his dragon thoughts...you are his, just as he is yours, but he just can't help the thoughts of biting into your shoulder, leaving deep marks that you see every morning when getting dressed, and every evening before bed.

arlecchino is definitely strong...i think she's hiding some muscles under her fancy coat. she holds you down so firmly, she's gonna leave some bruises. she gets busy with leaving hickies everywhere, but strategically placed ever so slightly below your shirt collar or waistband..

while ningguang prefers her skin to be completely and perfectly unblemished, you're not leaving without some marks on you. she likes leaving them in places nobody can see, but she's all too aware of exactly every spot she left hickies...

dehya just loves seeing her marks all over you. she'll leave hickies anywhere you let her: neck, shoulders, chest, thighs, you name it. and, yes, she wants to see them. she wants everyone to see them and have no doubt in their minds who was responsible

receiving

wriothesley, zhongli, yelan, dehya

wriothesley wants you to leave hickies on his neck, purposefully having you put them where everyone can see! also scratch down his back. he's already got scars, but these ones are special to him. you'll catch him admiring them in the mirror

zhongli likes it when you mark him right back. you are his, but he's yours too, so please bite him back!! his fingers subconsciously rest over your bite...even if it doesn't last as long as the one he leaves on you...you'll just have to keep remarking him! oh, and yes, he also wants you to scratch your nails into his back

i would venture to assume that while yelan loves marking you up, she wants you to do the same. she has a claim on you, so you better fight to show her your claim on her. if she ever acts annoyed by hickies you leave, she's secretly so enamored by how much you want everyone to know she's yours

dehya wants your marks on her, duh. she's got scars, sure, and they carry stories. she wants your marks so she can carry you with her everywhere.

𝘣𝘳𝘦𝘦𝘥𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘬

zhongli, wriothesley, arlecchino

for the final time i will repeat it: dragon zhongli. it's in his primal instincts to fill you up. while he has matured much since his youth, he still holds some of those innate desires. you just awaken them in him...he loves watching his essence drip from you before pushing it back in. almost like another form of marking for him.

for wriothesley, it's all about the intimacy between you two. he likes mumbling to you about filling you up with him. he wants you pressed as close to him as possible. it's just how you're full of him, dripping with him, you know?

arlecchino runs an orphanage, she's constantly around kids. she's literally called father all day. she raises kids, and if she could give you some of your own, well...regardless of whether she can fill you up with her essence or not, she likes to talk you through it as if she is. she'll certainly fuck you like that's the goal.

well...if you made it this far into my dump of thoughts, let me know of yours in my askbox xoxoxo

i need more people to discuss with :(((

[pinetrees-in-the-water]

hiiii, can you do Tim/masky as a father figure to emo/scene kid teenagers??? C:

Oh my god of course!! This is so wholesome, as an emo myself and former scene kid I approve of the Dad Tim/Masky agenda <3

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

◇Masky/Tim Wright as a father figure to emo/scene teenagers◇

-He never thought of himself as the fatherly type considering all his addictions and his past with the Operator, but he found out that he WANTED to try his best to be a role model after meeting these kids.

-Actively doesn't abuse any substances around the kids as he doesn't wanna normalize it for them.

-He is so supportive. (Even if he can be a little aloof sometimes)

-Tim listens to some emo bands (I think he'd like Good Charlotte and Three Days Grace most) but overall never got super into the style side of the subculture.

-So he's completely facinated when the kids show up with racoon tail hair and gel spikes, hed seen kids back when he was a teenager with the style and is a little amazed kids are still dressing like that.

-If any other kids were bullying his kids he'd scare them, Tim's an intimidating man normally so him appearing behind them or yelling usually does the trick.

-Now if any adults decided to be dicks.....

-He wants to be a good influence and despises what the Operator made him do in the past so nothing TOO bad would happen but they'll certainly get a bit "roughed up".

-Gets the kids old 2000s magazines to go through so they can learn more about what the subculture was like at its peak.

-Tim would absolutely dig up all his old CDs for ANYTHING relevant and play them on car rides. He struggles sometimes when the nightmares or intrusive thoughts hit hard so sometimes a car ride with loud music and singibg teens is just what he needs.

-Road trips and stops by Gas station fast food places are a VERY common occurrence.

-Asks them to do his eyeliner (It becomes a regular occurrence since it hides his bags a bit and he pulls it off VERY well)

-Cannot dye hair, will offer to help if the kids are struggling but its a bad idea.

-Constantly reminds the kids to wear heat protectant when straightening their hair, will even buy them wigs if their hair is getting too damaged.

- "You can't dye your hair green if you have no hair left kid"

-Fucking despises shopping because of the crowds. He's been wearing the same old jackets for forever because "They work".

-Despite this he'll still try and come along for the kids, maybe stand a little suspiciously in a corner of the shop until they're all done.

-Takes the kids out to all the concerts in the area (mostly sneaks them in ngl hes not a bad influence but hes not the best one either)

-Likes how colorful scene clothing can be but does not get all the memes and subculture norms, dude doesn't have a social media.

-"What is XD and :3?"

-Asked if Invader Zim was a rat as a joke, this was followed up with all the kids and Tim binging all the episodes with the kids (he ended up enjoying it).

-The more time he spends with them, unknowingly he starts to see them as his own :)

[capsiicle]

[ Rook's Horny Shenanigans, FT. The Third Years ] : Vil Schoenheit

Contains: Vil Schoenheit/Rook Hunt, top AMAB Vil Schoenheit, bottom AFAB Rook Hunt, lots of smooches, lipstick stains, vil being the perfectionist he is, handjobs, brief blowjob, cum swallowing, making out, hickeys, brief implied asphyxiation

Note: this was kinda rushed i'm ngl. anyways, i am spreading the "rook is afab, a whore and has slept with half the school" agenda and you will have to pry it from my cold, dead hands.i also have like other 5 drafts, but i also have no brain cells to continue them as of right now. repetative, like everything else i write.

Rook hummed as he watched Vil scold dorm members, biting his lip with a smile. He walked up to him, clapping his hands together with a smile. He ushered him away from the dorm members, tutting.

"Roi du Poison, do you need some stress relief?" He purred out, batting his eyelashes at the dorm head. He got a short glare before Vil grabbed his wrist and pulled him along back to his room. Rook smiled, licking his lips.

"It's always so easy to entice you, dearest. Do you like me that much?" He whispered teasingly as Vil pushed him against the wall once they got into his room. Rook opened his mouth to speak again, but was quickly interrupted by lips pressing against his own and a hand sliding up his shirt.

Rook moved his hands gently into Vil's hair, doing his best not to pull on it. As much as he wanted to pull it, wanted to ruin Vil's perfect look so he would ruin him in return, the school day wasn't over yet and the dorm head would not be happy with him.

"How's your jaw?" Vil whispered as he moved his lips to his jaw, kissing it softly as Rook's hands moved to Vil's pants, tugging on the belt with a soft moan. Rook grinded his hips slightly against the other, whining when Vil stopped his movements with a harsh grip on his hips.

"It's fine, Roi du Poison, Roi du Dragons, hng, isn't as rough as you are." Rook teased, throwing his head back with a moan as Vil bit down on his shoulder. He chuckled at the possessive streak of the dorm head, knowing he only got like this during their sessions, and it was fun to tease him about it.

"But, if you're really worried, I wouldn't mind giving you a handjob... As long as you keep leaving lipstick stains on my neck, oui?" Rook purred, slipping his hand into Vil's pants and palming his boner slowly, watching in delight as the other shivered against him. A whine escaped him as nails dragged over the scars on his chest, a sharp bite on his neck as he grabbed the outline of Vil's cock.

"Just, hurry up." Rook let out a chuckle. He loved hearing Vil grow impatient, it was so rare after all. He was usually composed and calm, to an extent, and seeing him fall apart with a few touches brought undescribable joy to the vice housewarden.

Recieving another bite, Rook pulled Vil's pants and underwear down to his thighs, wrapping his hand around the hard cock. He slowly moved his hand, using the other to gently tilt Vil's face up, kissing him again. The housewarden wrapped an arm around his waist and pulled him closer, while Rook moved the hand on his jaw to his hair, tugging on it gently.

"Mhn, you should, hah, fuck me when school is over, Vil~" Rook purred as he moved his hand faster, rolling his thumb over the head. The housewarden rolled his eyes as he kissed him again, his lipstick smearing on both of them as he continued playing with Rook's chest.

"I can't, Epel has vocal lessons." Vil muttered as he littered bites and kisses along his collar. Rook shuddered as Vil thrusted into his hand, licking his lips as he nudged him gently with his shoulder. Vil grunted, and Rook laughed in his mind at how people would react to this side of him, and let the other get down on his knees.

Wrapping his hands around Vil's thigh, he opened his mouth wide and took his cock into his mouth, looking up at him through his eyelashes, purring as the other started thrusting roughly into his mouth, grabbing his hair and holding it tightly. Rook's eyes rolled back, putting his hand between his thighs and grinding down against his own palm as his housewarden fucked his throat.

Vil held him against his pelvis, Rook's body shaking as cum filled his mouth, moaning as he bobbed his head slowly, swallowing around the other. Vil pulled his head off, Rook panting heavily as he looked up at him.

"Gosh, you're so messy..." Vil cooed, wiping some cum off his chin and put his thumb in Rook's mouth. He sucked it off his finger, licking his lips before getting up, placing a kiss on Vil's lips. The man made a face and shook his head, a fond look in his eyes as he fixed his pants.

"Alright, get out, I need to fix my makeup." Rook nod his head and hummed happily as he walked out of the room. "Don't forget to clean up!"

Rook pretended not to notice the new first years staring at the state of his neck.

[bonesandthebees]

So Roses. First of all I love me some royalty au’s. Especially, with succession struggles. So when you do get around to writing it, it will eat that shit up. That’s also what instantly hooked me on Stars royalty + space.

Anyway, you are once again creating an speaking story simply by flipping the overdone dynamics around. I can’t speak for Techno or Tommy, but so far none of SBI are royalty. It’s very fun to see Phil as the royal advisor (who definitely has his own agenda with all the secret messages). I do think he has a lot more power than you would think. He got his way very easily with Sam. Like he basically got permission to make the decision.

I’m gonna be honest, I was expecting Phil to try and push Wilbur as a potential heir, but I think he’s more trying to set up a puppet king situation. Like he wants Quackity at the palace because if he does become heir he’s more likely to take Wilbur as his advisor if he already knows him. Also I feel like the tnt duo is going to be off the charts in this story. It feels like it’s going to be childhood friends/rivals maybe both.

And then there’s Sam. Sam who doesn’t want to get married because he has Ponk, even if he could get married and keep him. I do think that’s very sweet, but that action has consequences. We’ll enjoy the fallout.

-🌲

YEAHHH ngl spruce I was excited to post this partially bc i knew you were gonna be so game for it lmao

oh yeah phil's definitely got way more power than you'd think he would. the inspo for sandduo in this au came from house of the dragon actually, and while this won't make sense if you haven't seen it, at one point I was like "man what if Otto Hightower wasn't a total dick to Alicent and she was actually into his scheming and the two worked together when she was younger they'd be a very powerful father daughter duo" and then the idea of 'advisor to the king phil who has so many schemes of his own going on + wilbur his son working with him and learning from him' popped into my head. (that's where the inspo ends tho bc like. there aren't gonna be any marriage manipulation plots in this fic lol)

sam is not really a... forceful king to be honest. he relies a lot on phil for his advice, and the Consil's role also includes taking over for the king if he's sick or unavailable at a certain time. so the Consil is essentially the second most powerful person in the kingdom. also related to what you said at the end, he doesn't want to get married because he has ponk yes, but it's going to cause a lot of fallout. he doesn't really care though. when it comes to running the kingdom, he's more than happy to let phil do the hard stuff for him. but he has one line and he's gonna draw it there, succession crisis be damned

the thing is, wilbur as a potential heir would never work. because this is based (albeit loosely) off medieval royalty politics, which were all about blood. wilbur and phil don't have any blood ties to the royal family. wilbur could never be an heir because he's not blood-related to sam, unlike niki who is sam's cousin, and quackity who is his nephew. so yeah, that's off the table so what's phil gonna go for instead? second best option :)

ohhhh the tntduo is gonna be so fun in this fic. the main wilbur relationships I think I'm gonna focus on are (in no particular order): rainduo, crimeboys, tntduo, and sandduo (with a healthy dose of sweaterduo too)

you guys have no idea how much I've been brainrotting this I spent a ridiculous amount of time the other day figuring out what historical fashion trends are gonna be present in this hand wavy alternate universe medieval but not medieval era. I'm in DEEP

[uncommon-etc]

To follow up with a more positive post from my ‘top 5 dumbest criticisms debunked’ here’s a list of adorable and well-thought-out details from Thor: Love and Thunder, which, while not that difficult to spot, I appreciated even more the second time round.

- The costume department made Tessa Thompson at least four different perfectly tailored suits for approximately eight seconds of footage. Was it a waste of fabric? Absolutely not.

- Jane isn’t just a sci-fi nerd for reeling off films that explain wormholes well, her Halloween costume in the montage is Ash from Alien, post chest-burster scene.

- Thor has Nick Fury’s contact saved to his phone as ‘Nick Furry’ which will never not be funny to me.

- Was giving Dwayne a mustache when Kronans have absolutely no capacity to grow facial-hair an absolutely ridiculous decision that some poor vfx artist should have been sacked over? Absolutely. But it was also a really nice callback to Taika’s childhood Freddie Mercury obsession, so jot that down.

- That poor guy who got hit in the face when a certain cape was flung for dramatic emphasis has my sympathies.

- The little broken heart next to Thor’s ‘RIP Loki’ tattoo was hilarious and tragic at the same time.

- It was definitely ‘bring your daughter to work day’ on set, I’ve already seen plenty of people remarking on the adorableness of Chris Hemsworth’s kidlet, but both of Taika’s daughters were among the stolen Asgardian kids and were apparently really mean to Christian Bale.

- Despite having all the trappings of a family-friendly film you get multiple ‘oh shit’ lines, though it feels entirely appropriate to the tone of the scenes, there are also at least two references to a mass orgy held on a regular basis in Omnipotent City.

- All of the snacks in the vending machine Thor breaks are region-appropriate, which pleased me as someone who grew up only getting to eat that stuff in Finland or on family trips to IKEA and ngl, if I was having to pay like 2-3 euros for a pack of Marabou or some salmiakki, and I had super-strength, I’d probably just smash the thing too.   

- Glad to see independent theatre is still thriving in New Asgard, but the irony of Valkyrie being very done with the two actors while wearing a Phantom of the Opera t-shirt was not lost on me. Her being a closet theatre-kid seems pretty on-brand. 

- Sif still being a badass sword-fighter with only one arm (why is that such a common injury in the MCU?)

- Idk why, but the scene on the boat where the straight half of the crew are outside doing straight things while Korg and Valkyrie are propping up the bar, drinking and discussing being gay felt... weirdly relatable. If that isn’t how you and your friends end up at the tail-end of a house-party don’t @ me.

- It seemed a really odd choice at first to have a film with three semi-sentient weapons that have their own personalities and a fourth that’s just kind of there, but in hindsight it’s also hilarious. Stormbreaker’s got beef with Thor and Mjolnir and the Necrosword parallel each other beautifully (both are slowly killing the person that wields them, but the motives are polar opposites) so I kept waiting for the thunderbolt to have some whole hidden agenda of its own, but no, it was the only cool-looking god-level weapon that was... just a weapon.

I’ll probably think of more to add, because I love this film so damn much, but feel free to chip in if there’s any obvious ones I’ve forgotten.

[yesimwriting]

hiii, this might seem weird but do u have any head cannons for when the reader is pregnant and how the Darkling would react?

a/n love this concept,, it's not weird at all!! i feel like there's so much here!! also i leave for college this month and im lowkey starting to freak out so ive been watching star wars movies for comfort 😭and now i have half a mind to write for them, especially the prequels (cough, cough,, anakin) 😭 😭 that should tell you where i am mentally

anyways lets get into the headcanons:))

--

- okay so like most of my headcanons, this is probably going to be all over the place bc i feel like so many different things could change how he would react. Like if the darkling x reader have been trying to get pregnant, or an unplanned pregnancy with someone he really likes, i also think whether or not the reader is a grisha affects his reaction too

- in general though, i think he'd lowkey have a breeding kink he'd def find something about the thought of you having his child really attractive bc for one thing, he wouldn't have to worry about being left alone and now he has an excuse to be a real 'protector'.

- also if youve read my other headcanons i am 100000% convinced that he has this thing where if he really likes someone he needs them to need him (let's all remember the whole 'i will strip you of everything you know and love speech until I'm your only shelter' speech he gave to Alina)

- also i kinda want to write a fic or blurb series or something that's just the darkling being super toxic in super thoughtful ways LMAO if that makes sense, like he's being super sweet but it's to make sure the reader is dependent on him

- and he def wants to be the protector to give himself some sense of assurance bc he's so desperate to not be alone anymore and bc the reader is the only person he has/loves, he wants to feel in control and like he's the less attached one

- okay,, let's get back to the pregnancy thing, anyways, your pregnancy is most definitely activating all of those senses and this was meant to be a sub plot but it kind of became it's own thing lol

- so lets get to the actual pregnancy reaction

if you two have been trying to get pregnant:

- when you tell him, he kind of like, pauses bc it's not every day that he gets surprised so it takes him a moment to register that he's experiencing shock lol, so he tenses and goes islent

- and then after he realizes that he's surprised and that it's bc of a good thing, he manages to relax

- meanwhile you're kind of freaking out bc he got so quiet?? you start to wonder if he's regretting ever wanting a child with you? and you're like two seconds away from a downspiral and then he...

- he touches your cheek and looks at you in a way you've never seen him look at anyone,, not even you

- the look is so warm and strong and full of fierce admiration that you feel foolish for ever thinking he didn't want this. And then he says something about how you're carrying his child and how he didn't realize he could adore you more and then he kisses you and it's all :)) warm:)

- he doesn't want anyone to know that he's expecting a child as long as possible bc of how many enemies he has and how he has to worry about you enough when people just know that you're his 'lover' (a title you never really liked, but one he tells you is necessary to make sure no one realizes the extent of his attachment)

- if you really want to tell your mother or someone of that relation, he won't be mad about it, but he just needs to know

- Genya is the only exception bc the darkling basically instructs her to look out for you,, but when you tell her she's like oh?? you guys just found out?

- miss girl most definitely noticed like a day and a half ago after you cried bc she couldn't find you ice cream the other night 😭and she just assumed you knew but weren't ready to tell anyone

- okay so this what i think is his most problematic expecting father trait would be. So i just ranted about how important secrecy would be to him but he's also the most overprotective person in the entire world,, like he was bad before but once he knows your with child?? yeah, if a man asks you about the weather, he's done for

- he's next to you in a second, ordering either you or the man to do some asinine task

- if you get mad about this (rightfully so) or even just point out how nothing is wrong and you having a casual conversation with a man who isn't even looking at you sexually won't hurt you or the baby, he'll lose rationality

- it depends on how much you push, but it'd be super easy to make him super possessive bc like i said, being bonded by a child has made him so much more intense (and he was pretty intense before)

- and if you push too much he'll lowkey forget about how cautious he's trying to be with you and pin you against the nearest wall and say something along the lines of 'are you already forgetting you're mine? that i own you, body and soul--is my child growing in you not enough of a reminder? because i'll give you another one if you need it.' (AH--i want to write a whole fic based on this line)

- also if the reader is grisha, especially if she's a sun summoner/special grisha like him, he def talks about the power that they've created and how proud he already is and how he can't wait to train together and be the most powerful family in the world

- not everything is perfectly happy though, bc now he feels more pressure to complete his plan and establish the world he wants his child to be born into

- so sometimes when he's working extra hard or is extra aggressive for no reason, you have to work at calming him down and reminding him that the best thing he can do for his child is be there for them (and the child's mother,, lol)

- sometimes he'll respond by actually listening to you and trying to make up for his absence or his aggression by being extra soft until you finally forgive him

- you never last that long, it's hard to be mad at him when he's coddling you and whispering such sweet things about he's so happy to have you and your future child

- overall, his first reaction is to swell with emotion, which he isn't used to, and so he becomes super protective but also extra lovey and you know that his overreactions are just him trying to show that he cares about you and your future child more than anything

If the pregnancy was unplanned:

- the initial reaction is pretty similar, only his state of shock lasts longer

- like i said at the beginning, he's not used to being surprised and an accidental pregnancy is so much more surprising than a planned pregnancy

- this really sucks for you bc he's not exactly known for his patience so you just kinda sit there and genuinely wonder if you're going to be a single mom or if you're going to want to deletus the fetus or something

- but then he takes a step towards you and you see how he's looking at you and you just know that that fierceness has to mean something good

- and at this point you're scared and nervous and feel so alone so tears are pricking at your eyes,, so he wipes his thumb across your cheek to wipe away tears you won't let spill

- he then whispers something really sweet about how you two are now together forever, as you should be

- it's really relieving bc you felt so alone and uncertain and he's such a smooth speaker that by the end of the night, you feel like this is a good thing

- if youre still hesitant/weighing your options, he's not above trying to (gently) manipulate you into thinking that what he wants may be the only way

- by that,, i don't mean outright tricking you bc he means everything he says, but he def is pushing the keeping the baby agenda,, especially if you're a grisha,, and even more so if you're a grisha with similar power levels to him

- he won't get angry at first bc he's not so out of touch that he's unaware of how shocking a pregnancy is to a woman who wasn't planning one,, but his patience is limited and if you fight it too much he will get mad and yell

- but unless you really don't want to have a child, it won't get to that bc he makes the idea of having a baby with him sound so perfect?? like you genuinely don't understand how he did that

- he chases away all of your worries and assures you that youre not alone and that even though it isn't planned he wouldn't rather anyone else carry his child

- the initial conversation would probably end in you two sleeping together again bc he finds the fact that you're carrying his child so attractive and bc being aware of the pregnancy makes him more possessive

- it's also a good way to fight any of your doubts

- speaking of being possessive though,, i feel like he could be a little more possessive/protective of a reader who didn't plan on getting pregnant bc your relationship has been less established

- no one sees you as anything to him and he doesn't want to start rumors now bc it's important to him that his enemies don't find out about you or his future child so he doesn't want that to change

- but he almost forgets about all of those reasons each time he sees a man get a little too close,, especially if that guy is flirty

- it takes all of his will power to not just go 'she's mine and if i wasn't worried about the stress that witnessing something violent would cause our unborn child, you'd be dead already, but if you're not gone by the time i turn around, i'll forget about caution'

- lots of close calls ngl!! at one point youre like 'if it bothers you so much, maybe you should tell someone??' and he's like 'no,, maybe,, shut up' and then you raise one eyebrow and he just closes his mouth and is like 'i mean,, i'll kiss you to shut you up, haha--dont be mad'

- youre the one that's pregnant but sometimes you think he might be the one experiencing the mood swings i swear 😭

- so your little theory gets tested,, he's not the type to gossip with his besties and be like 'guess who's officially my girlfriend, i knocked her up but it's not like it sounds--'

- so he's like ig you can tell genya

- once again genya is like ?? yall thought you were keeping that secret? couldn't be me

- but having it a little out in the open helps ease him just enough that youre actually capable of consoling him when he becomes jealous

- still though,, he's quick to go into possessive/pregnancy kink sex

- youre most def not mad about it,, unless pregnancy has you particularly sore

- he's normally pretty understanding about that and def doesn't mind pulling his weight in the bedroom when he needs

- honestly he'd be really good at being a source of calmness at the beginning, but as time goes on he becomes more and more worried about finishing his plans bc he didn't expect to have a child right now

- so he'd be more adamant about working/becoming more tense and would be more difficult to console if it was an accidental pregnancy

- when you call him out on it--or on anything while your pregnant--it's frustrating for you both bc the number one thing everyone knows is stress is bad for baby, so he's trying to keep you calm without backing down

- these argument always end with one of you clinging to the other,, and then the more angrier of the two just like shuts up, rolls their eyes, and lets go of the argument...at least for now

- the main difference between an accidental and intentional pregnancy would probably be how you perceive him,, bc an intentional pregnancy means youve talked about things but since you havent talked about anything your shocked about how soft he becomes ??

[27emailsicantsend]

Season 3 Episode 6 Thoughts

WOW this episode was as Ricky put it “heart wrenching”

Like I know he’s been feeling it all season but I’ve been so well fed with the content. This episode I genuinely felt what Ricky felt. That was hard

But before we get too into rina I’ll make some other notes first

Ashlyn feeling the fireworks and pw not??? Oh sorry pw you’re bones but that was so sweet for Ashlyn

I have really enjoyed watching her discover herself and her sexuality this season. I remember season one thinking she was not super straight and so it’s cool really seeing her find her full identity this season (something she stated she had a hard time with). Which is an interesting insight to who she is at EH because she always has loads of clubs she’s in and stuff right? It’s like she could never settle on being one thing because maybe she actually didn’t totally know herself but now she does.

I also appreciate the Maddox and Jet storyline. I was team blue but very happy yellow won. It seemed like a really sweet victory for them and it was nice watching Jet try to restore that relationship

I kind of expected that storyline to resolve this episode so it was interesting seeing that Maddox still doesn’t feel totally resolved. I wonder what else will happen

I’m SO excited for Sebby to come back for prom 🥹 I miss him so much and I’m sure Carlos does too ❤️

The scene of Miss Jenn teaching EJ her directing tips 😭😭 pls it was so funny. When she talked about angrily shoving the papers in the binder. I NEED someone to gif Ej doing that so I can use it as a reaction meme lmao

I also LOVED her referring to herself as mommy or that they were her children, her son, etc. anyone else it is kinda weird but idk it works for her?

Although it didn’t work for Miss Jenn last season when Ricky got mad at her 😶 but I didn’t say that

I also wonder what the Miss Jenn and Mike agenda is? This cruise feels kind of out of left field for their relationship? It doesn’t seem like they were together that long for her to just hop on a boat with someone? But also what happened to Mozzarella Stick? Tbh I’m indifferent as of right now to both couples. I would be happy with her with either guy… I’m just confused because S2 left her relationships sooo up in the air so I’m curious to see if that gets more resolved S4

It was SO healing for my childhood to see Corbin perform again. I am actually sad he didn’t do the wildcats cheer too. It was a nice rina moment that came from it but I’m like 🥺

I also appreciate the implications of Corbin reliving his Disney games days. And then mixing dancing and basketball together after Chad made such a big deal about dance and baseball/basketball not mixing. Just loads of nostalgia 🥲

Carlos kept mentioning something about wanting a dressing room?? And they showed miss Jenn giving a little face that seemed like she was up to something with that? I wonder what that was about? What if she made him his own little dressing room before the rehearsal? 😭 she showed ashlyn how important her part is and she might do the same for Carlos 😭😭 oh that’s cute

Also miss Jenn finding the licorice at some random store was a shout out to the “big summer blowout” in frozen. I love 🥰

I made a separate post about this on my page but I think the pw canoe scene was very on the nose to The Little Mermaid? I kind of think it might be a hint at next seasons musical

I’ve been so-so about the jetney agenda but watching him cheer her on and the parallels of them having stuffed animals + some of the looks have been cute I’m ngl

I kinda got annoyed at Val this episode. She was very… pushy? Like pushy with Kourt, pushy with Ashlyn understanding “who she is”… idk something about this episode rubbed me the wrong way with her

Ok now for the best part RINA

MY SWEET BABIES I MISSED YOU (lmao am I miss Jenn coded??)

The HUG AND HAVING ONE EVERY EPISODE 6. So now they have massive parallels for each 5th and 6th episode of the seasons? Tim you better keep this up for future seasons

But really the hug was so sweet and watching Gina go to him first because she was proud of herself 🥲

ALSO the troyella basketball parallels??? Hello?????? That was so cute. I wanted to see him go behind her and help her shoot.

Also I wanted ricky to be the only one who helped her up after she fell but we can’t always win 😭

Isn’t it interesting that EJ ONCE AGAIN points out to Ricky something he can’t figure out as ginas boyfriend? (Why she hasn’t laughed at his jokes but is laughing at Ricky’s) oof the jealousy is strong in this one

But also Ricky made gina laugh 🥹

I LET COLOR WARS SLIP THROUGH MY FINGERS

Also watching Ricky’s crying was HARD. He hasn’t cried that hard for anything else, including his break up with Nini. (I pointed this out in another post). Like this REALLY affected him

AND THEY DID THE RINA CUE WHILE HE CRIED BECAUSE TIM IS EVIL AND LIKES TO WATCH RINAS SUFFER

Ngl I was a teeny bit disappointed with that scene in the cabin. I thought that we would get the flashback or even a little more around why Ricky was so upset but jet made things about him then Ricky had an idea and the scene was over. I just feel like the dialogue got cut really short and there could have been even a couple more sentences to make the scene feel a little more whole. I would have LOVED the flashback here too but we can’t always win

I will say though, I’ve had this theory that the characters that the kids are playing not on stage is Ricky being Kristoff and jet being Sven and this scene amplified that. Remember how annoyed in frozen Kristoff got at Sven when he tried to make Kristoff go back to Anna or keep going through the woods with her? Kristoff got snappy. Me thinks Mr Bowen is portraying that same quality

I loved watching Ricky cheer Gina on in all the events 🥹 you can even hear him in the scene where she is rock climbing. It’s just such supportive boyfriend material unlike SOMEONE 🫥👀

Also did you notice when Ej was telling gina all the reasons he needed the show to go perfect she was the LAST reason? It was like he was explaining all of his anxieties and stress and then it was like “oh yeah and you too so I don’t have to stress over that either”. It was just.. yikes

(I still really would love a Kourtney and Ej scene where they talk to each other about the anxieties they’ve been facing)

I would love to see some sort of parallel where Gina feels or hears the words or something about the fireworks when she’s with Ricky. It’s interesting how miss Jenn pointed that out and we clearly saw them with Ashlyn and we also clearly saw how pw waited and waited for them to show. It was very in your face that they wanted these fireworks to happen so badly and they were never going to come. Instead of showing pw watching the fireworks to show they came we just got Ricky crying to the rina cue. I think having some sort of parallel to the fireworks with rina is going to be our way of knowing rina are finally on the same page. Ricky knows his feelings and whatever feelings gina has swallowed or push to the side have resurfaced and she acknowledges them too. Their love will feel like fireworks 🎆

ALSO (someone on Twitter pointed this out can’t remember who so if you know pls comment so they get credit) the scene where ricky takes Ej to gina parallels the scene heavily where Kristoff takes gina to hans. It’s not what he wants but it’s putting the other person first which shows you love someone. (Which I pointed out was a direct quote from frozen)

And sorry not sorry I’m gonna say it: I don’t think Ricky is just crushing on Gina or just likes her. He even made this a point “on accident” last episode. Ricky is IN LOVE with Gina. His feelings are so much deeper than he or others may be willing to admit

Ok friends I’m sure I have more thoughts but it’s 3am so my brain is VERY tired. I will post more throughout the week because it’s going to be tough waiting to get to episode 7 😅

Please send asks talking to me about theories, questions, etc through the week. I would love them! I have one in my inbox right now I’ll get to tomorrow but I’d love to discuss more with ya’ll :)

Ok have a good night! ❤️ rina endgame

[nightswithkookmin]

Hi Goldy.

I PURPLE 💜 your blog so much. I was reading every single post like the little ALT shipper that I am. Fell in love with BTS and jikook 🐰🐥 after one video.

Anyway I’m here to ask. Have you seen the VLIVE from eight days ago when BTS won the artist award at the AMA? They sip champagne and eat pizza and cake, when the WiFi goes down and Namjoon shades them big time and then Jim comes in to save the day ‘we love our company very much’ and which Jhope goes ‘you said that very suddenly’. NJ hugs Jin and he says NJ, Jhope and him love the company loads / the most.

Jim in asks what about us? To which NJ replies ‘you can love them less’ and everyone looks confused 💀💀💀And Jungkook suddenly understands and shakes hands with NJ.

They look at the staff behind the screen (Jin in particular).

What in the conspiracy does it mean!?!

If you have an idea 💡 would love to hear. I genuinely can’t imagine lol I’m so new to what they’re hinting.

Saranghae 🥰

AS YOU SHOULD SIS, I ROCK 💜

If I say so my self

Lol.

I don't know if conspiracy is what I'd call it. Much like a shade gone wrong. An ironical situation exacerbated by the Joonie touch😫

Namjoon has a quirky sense of humor that often flies over people's heads and make things unintentionally and unnecessarily awkward most times😭😭😭

For instance, he just called himself a perv on national television which has sparked debates and threads about him watching too much porn or stigmatizing the BDSM community describing Masochists as Pervs.

Didn't see that one coming did ya🤣

While i got the porn/BDSM references off the bat i didn't make anything of his statement. Actually thought it was funny but here we are reporting and blocking user perky nipples in a harness.

In my opinion, when Jin says he loves the company it's funny and ironic because he has a reputation for giving the company grief hence Tae's reaction and let's not act like they didn't lowkey roast the company in there for five seconds. Lol.

Had vlive not been for hybe they would have dragged it for filth in that moment 🤣🤣💀

I love when they get messy and start throwing gang signs around 🙃

RM joining in with a subtext threw every one for a loop with their confused looks on their faces. Lol. Lost me there for a second too not gonna lie. But he does that a lot, in Run episodes, Seasons greetings with that whole JK is the leader of the Males and females comments- knocked the amusement right out of JK's eyes😭

Should have left it at 'Males'😭

NAMJOOONAH KIM NAMJOONNNNN!!!!! lol

His sense of humor is....

I don't know Hobi to be the rebel type- other than instances when he'd said he almost left the company. I think he is rather a model tanny. But Joonie can be a bit rebellious almost as rebellious as Jk or lowkey insubordinate like Jin but because he is a leader that gets mitigated most times💀

Ngl, I take Jin seriously when he throw shade💀 He's sneaky like that.

Suga checked out of the conversation and didn't participate in whatever the joke was- alright lemme cut the bull. The BTS x Hybe kumbaya agenda is as kumbaya as my two cheeks behind me. They try though. In my opinion.

The boys will throw shade like they are not throwing shade but they are throwing shade. FREE HYBE🤣🤣🤣🤣

I think what RM was implying was they finna simp and kiss the company's ass while the others can be more objective or subjective or not so blindly subservient to the company.

I think you should ask the Korean bloggers for their thoughts on it to reflect the nuances of that conversation as I don't speak or understand Korean.

Given as it was the poor streaming service and the app unable to handle that large number, I take it they would have segued into roasting the company for providing such poor services- but since it's their own company then it's like they can't do that so they powered down. But they didn't expect the others to power down too if you know what I mean.

Much like 'we love and respect the company so much we won't criticize them- but y'all feel free to tear them apart" kinda vibe.

It also felt like an inside joke or something. It felt as if Jin was shading some of the members or hinting at a possible friction between the company and some members- if it was shade to the members my money will be on JM, Suga💀

JM because he actually has 'reasonssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss' to love the company less- from the blatant disrespect not informing him his song which he produced was on a movie as huge as Marvel eternal. For him to have found out the way he did was just bad and reflects poorly on the company.

Like we know they don't own the right to their songs but STILL. You don't gotta make it obvious damn. Like did you not seek his permission first when Marvel called to ask permission to use the song? Sus.

Did y'all not give him a cut of the fee paid upfront whats up?! Jimin, my guy...

And if they really allegedly put him in Prestige class on that flight unwillingly whew them finna catch an ass whooping in the backyard at noon if I lay eyes on em🤺

I can let squeezing him out of Eternals slide, killing his flex on the gram- now that's where I draw the line!

They can't come embarrass me and my bias out here like that! Like what's that!

Bling bling on our wrist, gucci in our hair, first class is where we at.

And they shouldn't think we don't know Jimin don't have his own studio at hybe yet

Or may be he do. Don't know don't care. But I need him in the studio with a view of the pool and Jungkook glistening naked ass with a tray and a glass of Soju at his beck and call. His titties better sparkle.

Didn't even give him voice training when he needed it and constantly made him live in anxiety and fear of losing his Job.

PJMS DON'T FORGET

I'm telling jesus when i get to heaven.

The day BTS leave Hybe they will smell real chili peper from all of us🌶

Also that drastic change to his body is sus as hell given as the company tends to have body requirements of boys- it's a bit sus that JM will suddenly change his body "concept" out of the blue within a short while talking about all the health benefits when it's like but sir didn't you know all that before now??

And I love how, I talked about this way before it all happened- about him trying to build his muscles back, him lifting weights- he denied all that with that whole "I'm not trying to buff up" "I'm not doing crazy exercises" to now saying he works out with his boyfriend and actually lift weights💀

Seriously though, I think they love the company but won't miss a chance to shade the nonexistent edges off their Heads. To be fair to the company, they do be roasting themselves more than any artist I've seen on this planet so it's nothing personal💀

Jin... Jin is Jin.

It's all the times he's posted BangPD cooking for them or reiterated how amazing their company is whenever the company comes under fire for mistreating their artists for me🤣🤣🤣🤣

Also... Jungkook don't got it🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

He just likes to pretend he do.

Unless there's something I'm missing I don't think it was sus but I enjoyed talking about it hehehehe.

💜💜💜💜💜💜😊

GOLDY

[hinac0lada]

I DON’T LIKE YOUR SHAMPOO

CHARACTER PAIRING | oikawa tooru x gn!reader

INFO | soulmate!au, fluff

WORDS | 1.9k 

NOTE | by the time i’m probably posting this, is one day before my beloved’s birthday FNKLFNGK ngl i’m pretty excited and i hope ya’ll are too (besides the fact that the manga is coming to an end but let’s not talk about that-) 

WARNINGS | NONE

more to see under the cut!

you live in a world where soulmate marks exist. everyone has different types of marks ranging from; timers, red strings of fate, roman numerals, half tattoos, etc. as you grow old, you watch people find their soulmates, and on some unfortunate occasions, lose them. 

each person had different views on the concept of soulmates, it wasn’t sunshine and rainbows all the time, but you stayed neutral after receiving every side of the spectrum that varied from the good side —  as well as the bad side of meeting their other halves.

you knew you were bound to meet your own soulmate either way, but you wouldn't get your hopes up just like that — until you received your soulmate mark on the morning of your 15th birthday.

it was a beautiful tattoo on your wrist. written were the words that your soulmate would say to you on your first encounter. your parents told you that the time and date of your encounter with them — along with their words to you, would turn golden as soon as you’ve said your first words to each other; just like how their soulmate mark worked. and although you were aware that every mark is different, you couldn’t help but raise a brow from confusion at the sentence that was permanently placed on your wrist.

‘well to be honest, i don’t like your perfume’

it read, an intriguing way to say to your soulmate, you thought to yourself. and that night, you couldn’t help but admire the pretty letterings on your wrist; rubbing your thumb against it, grinning from ear to ear like a fool. 

days went by from when you received your tattoo, you’d constantly wonder what your soulmate was like or when and how you were going to meet them. tracing your fingers along the tattoo turned into a habit whenever you’re bored or anxious about something. to add to that, the thought of their existence would sometimes consume you, and you’d be stuck in a loophole of questions and doubts. 

‘what if they don’t like me? or what if they don’t want to be my soulmate? what if they think i’m ugly? or a disappointment?’ 

regardless of the negative thoughts and worries you had in your head everyday, you were still eager to meet them — even if it takes a thousand years, a thousand hours, or maybe even if they are a thousand miles away, you can’t wait for the day that you’d get to meet them.

or what if it only takes a few months, or a few days? maybe even a few seconds? what if they were across the world? or just across the street? possibly next door? in spite of knowing not to get your hopes up, you can’t resist the anticipation of being face to face with the person you were promised to ever since the very beginning of your existence. 

and every day, you’d hold on to the wrist with your mark — the symbol of a promise to true love, hoping fate decides to take place sooner than expected. 

unbeknownst to you however, your true love was just within arm’s reach all this time.

it was the most awaited day of the academic year, the time where stressed out seniors get to relax for a whole day to indulge themselves in new sights and bond with their fellow batch mates before the dreaded era of finals — field trip day. 

everyone had their own plans, going to after school hang outs right after the planned trip, a handful bringing digital cameras to capture each moment , that one kid in class who has great taste in music providing the speaker, and the rest just going with the flow of today’s agenda.

while the majority of students did plan their seating arrangements on the bus, you, on the other hand, decided against it. in your opinion, it wasn’t a big deal. it was just a 2 hour drive to the destination so what could possibly go haywire? plus, it didn’t matter who was your companion on the bus, it’d open up the opportunity to get to know unfamiliar faces, being divided by classes and all, so what could possibly go wrong?

maybe, possibly everything.

who would’ve thought, out of all of your batch mates, you get to sit beside the grand king himself, oikawa tooru.

it wasn’t like his personality was completely intolerable, it’s the complete opposite, really. he was charming, greeting you with a close eyed grin before sitting down next to you. in the face of all the chaos his friends warned you the male would bring— plus the many chilling glares from his countless fan girls, his presence never shook you the wrong way at all.

you weren’t complete strangers, but you weren’t well acquainted either. you were in a different class and the only time you’d see his pretty face was when you’d pass each other in the hallways. but, what's there not to like about oikawa tooru? he was attractive, a gentleman, a charmer, a friendly being, and everything was as easy as apple pie.

“hey, just a heads up, shittykawa over here has a habit of sleeping on anyone’s shoulder. don’t be afraid to push his head aside when you’re uncomfortable.” iwaizumi hajime, his best friend and the hunk of aoba johsai, patted your shoulder reassuringly before taking his seat behind the two of you, alongside him was hanamaki takahiro and matsukawa issei - who were snickering at the flustered setter beside you. 

for some reason, you thought iwaizumi was just joking or he said that to make oikawa look bad — in which he failed. and so you didn’t take his statement seriously, disregarding it completely. and now you regret ever doing so, because it turned out to come true, eventually biting you back in the ass.

things took a turn when you suddenly felt the weight of the world on your shoulder  — idiomatically and literally.

it was exactly 30 minutes into the drive to your destination and you were on your phone to pass by the time, minding your own business when you suddenly felt pressure on your shoulder. you peered at your shoulder, only to be met with the sight of a sleeping oikawa, snoring lightly with his lips slightly parted.

you stayed still as a rock, not wanting to disturb his slumber - which he probably needed. although you didn’t plan to get him off your shoulder any time soon, you were clueless as to what to do if he doesn’t wake up. you glanced at his friends, who were expecting the whole thing to happen.

“do you need help with him?” hanamaki questioned, taking notice of your gaze at their trio. iwaizumi took your loss of words as agreement and got ready to shake his friend awake, until you stopped him.

“i-it’s okay.. i don’t mind really,” you reassured the three, giving a warm smile before focusing back on your phone, catching glimpses of the sleeping oikawa once in a while. you were far from annoyed. if anything else, you found it comforting for no apparent reason, his warmth that is. 

once you knew he was deep in rest, you shifted to a much more comfortable position for the two of you, one where you can almost smell his scent. which was a big mistake, because you remembered your allergies to this specific shampoo which was unfortunately the one he had right now. 

loreal shampoo.

oh the terror it gave you, you started to get war flashbacks to when you used it on your own hair as well, the horror of sneezing until your eyes were watery sent shivers down your spine at the cringe. 

and as much as you attempted to conceal your allergies, it backfired in the end and now you were left in a mess; sneezing profusely while scrambling to get your medications. you cursed your sensitive nostrils, seeing as you’ve woken up the brunette beside you, unaware of the situation at hand, his half lidded eyes looking around in a daze.

in the process of consuming your medicine, he asked if you were okay, rubbing the tiredness away from his eyes. 

“i.. don’t like your shampoo.” you managed to reply back in the midst of trying to calm down from the sudden attack of your allergies. oikawa, being clueless as to what you were trying to imply, took offense in your words. yet you couldn’t blame him, your answer was quite vague and it caught him off guard.

“well to be honest, i don’t like your perfume,” he retorted back with a pout embellishing his features, earning him an awfully painful smack on the back of his head from iwaizumi, accompanied with the eye rolls coming from hanamaki and matsukawa.

“dumbass, they have rhinitis. your shampoo triggered their allergies” iwaizumi explained to the setter, who was wincing in agony from the impact. You were on the verge of apologizing when the words that escaped his lips gave a sense of familiarity, as though you were accustomed to the sentence.

and then it both hit you. oikawa’s brown eyes dilated with realization, that look of his says it all. it was happening. how could you ever forget those words you were longing to hear, those words that you knew would bring you to your destiny someday?

it felt too surreal, you were immobilized with disbelief and shock. 

but then you felt an itch on your hand. and in a synchronized manner, you and oikawa looked at your own wrists, it was really happening. he was your soulmate. your promised lover. 

‘7/19/20.

2:20 PM’

the letters read in gold ink, a sight to behold. (e/c) irises clashed with one of chocolate brown, filled with bewilderment. your face heated up at the sight of his pink tinted cheeks. you’ve found your way home.

��what’s going on? they’re acting strange...” matsukawa whispers in hanamaki’s ear, baffled at the scene in front of him. iwaizumi then points a finger at their wrists, the distinct color of gold catching his attention.

after a while of literally staring into each other’s souls, a hearty laugh escapes your lips. the corners of oikawa’s lips tugged into a genuine smile, in which you reciprocated with one of your own. 

you were grateful that your first encounter was one of mediocrity - in a good way, of course. it was as if you were meeting an old friend, the warmth that his gaze holds gave you a sense of comfort. 

that smile of his was practically screaming ‘you’re home’. you’ve finally met your soulmate; face to face, and now your destiny rests in his hands, while his rests on your own.

the situation eventually calmed down and you two finally accepted the fact that you are soulmates. the bus was silent, light snores echoing, and everything was tranquil. you could see oikawa’s struggle from the corner of your eyes, his eyelids getting heavier for the nth time, trying not to repeat his mistake from earlier. 

“oikawa-”

“tooru, call me tooru please,” he corrected, a lopsided grin plastered on his face. his eyes fluttering, attempting to stay awake. 

“tooru, it’s okay, you can sleep on my lap instead,” you chuckled, hearing him mumble his gratitude, his head making its way to your lap. it was as if immediately, he was off to dream land once again, your hands gently running through his soft locks whilst trying to doze off as well.

“y’know, i think we should recommend each other products sometime.”

“good idea, maybe after this trip, tooru.”

“deal. well, good night.. my soulmate.”

“sweet dreams, my home.”

GENERAL TAGLIST : @pineapplekween​ @pyblos​ @some-oxymoron​ @kxgeyamasmilk​ @kunimwuah​ @kou-hakusei​ @rollingthundaa​ @ideshine​ @janellion​ @miyaosamoo​ @paripedia​ @bap-kingdom​ @rainyslvt​​ @inessawrr

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[violetnotez]

HC: BNHA Boys x Aizawa’s Daughter! Reader

Anonymous: Hello, Can I request headcanon for Todoroki, Bakugou and Midoriya who is dating Aizawa's daughter? She is in class 1-A but has a Quirk different from his

Hello anon! Im super sorry but I only did Shoto and Bakugo because of how long I made them- I hope you dont mind!

*Important Note: kinda backstory-ish so the HC’s make sense-basically y/n is adopted by Aisawa from a young age and she ironically has a quirk that intensifies other quirks

Alrightie thats all I wanted to add- hope you enjoy!

-----------------------------

SHOUTO

Aizawa totally saw that you two liked each other- you were his daughter, like of course he sees this!

Whenever Shouto would talk to you, your face would become a soft shade of pink and your nervousness would come out- you’d stumble over words, bite your lip, brush your hair behind you ears- the works

Shouto as well- it wasn’t as obvious, but he definitely acted different towards you

One time when Shoto was having a difficult time learning how to get out of zip ties (a strange little side lesson by Midnight- she wanted to show the class how to get out of a kidnapping situation in which Kaminari kept yelling out “this is sooooo kinky!” 

Jirou of course slapped him, which made Aizawa stifle a laugh)

Since you had always been around heroes most of your life, you were taught well in combat and self defense skills

Aizawa watched interested as you helped Todoroki, his face becoming tinted in red and his tone softer

After you had left to do your own assignment, Aizawa had caught Shoto just staring down at his hands in amazement as if he couldn’t believe what just happened

That’s when Aizawa knew you two liked each other

He really was okay with it though-most others would have thought the hero would be over the top protective, but with Shoto-he was a good kid, kinda quiet, had a darker past than most his age but-Aizawa knew Todoroki would never intentionally hurt you.

It took a few long,grueling months for Shoto to finally ask you out, and when he did, Aizawa could only feel relieved-because Jesus Christ he’d been just waiting for you two to just start dating already!

The only thing he was worried about was-well- Shoto’s father

He knew of Endeavor, never personally, just because of the fact that Aizawa never cared for the hero

He saw him as arrogant, rude, and blinded by his own personal agenda- he also knew of Shoto’s distatse for his father, which he knew had to be for a good reason

Shoto and Aisawa had both warned you of his father, with Shoto revealing his dark childhood to you and Aizawa warning you to not cross Endeavor’s path because of his entitled nature

You and Todoroki had no intention of telling his father of your relationship, until the day when you had mistakenly visited Todoroki’s house when his father was home

Was EXTREMELY awkward

Endeavor was not kind to you- in fact he was cold and unforgiving in what he said around you

Endeavor really was flabbergasted- how could his son be wasting his time over some girl? He was also disappointed in his choice- Endeavor found your quirk to be mediocre, since he had noticed you at the Sport’s Festival. He noted that your quirk was essentially only useful to others, nothing flashy about it at all- what a waste

Why couldn't Shoto find someone with more power to add to his family’s already strong gene pool?.

 Yes, he knew you were Aizawa’s daughter- but not even of blood- and even if you were, he wouldnt accept you two going out together

He also went on to say that Shoto should be focusing on his training, not on some little crush

 basically stated you weren't good enough for his family or son

Shoto quickly left with you, trying to reassure as much as possible that what his old man said was not true, and that he loved you no matter what

Did you kinda cry? Yes. And did Todoroki and Aizawa wanna kick Endeavor’s ass? Also a yes

You and Todoroki continued to go out with Aizawa backing you two up, even if Shoto got into a few arguments over you with his father

One day Aizawa was supervising a team building exercise, where it was pairs of two against two. You and Shoto were on one side, while Bakugo and Deku were on the other.

Endeavor had chosen to come to UA  that day to see how his son was improving, looking down at disdain that he was still courting you

Aizawa was not particularly happy having to deal with Endeavor- he knew he was judging your every move, every punch you landed, every mistake you made

You were very good at hand to hand combat though, even without a flashy quirk- as Bakugo and Shoto were sparring, you were taking Izuku head on, making him sweat a little, even with his own quirk against yours.

Endeavor still gave you the biggest dirty look ever

Aiszawa about to throw hands ngl

Then something happened- Izuku was able to finally land a hit on you, using his quirk to launch you back a few feet. You tumbled into the dirt, Todoroki running to see if you were okay.

“What is he doing?!” Endeavor grunted out in frustration, “Why is he-”

You strangely put out your hand, and Todoroki touched it. Endeavor was furious, seeing this as some form of weakness-

Todoroki then turned around, his quirk improving ten fold. Endeavor had never seen anything like it- Shoto had made an ice blast, larger than anyone he had ever seen- even from the Sports Festival.

It was-well- it was even better than his own quirk

 Aizawa looked at Endeavor’s clearly shocked face with a smug expression.

Hell yeah this scum bag now knows his daughter is freaking awesome

But then Endeavor’s mind started to race- clearly your quirk had some merit. If you and Shoto could produce a child with that much power on its own, hell, his family line would forever be the #1 hero!

He grinned at the thought, turning to Aizawa, a little too cheerful

“That’s your daughter, uh-” he searched for your name, “y/n, correct-”

“Dont even start,” Aisawa cut him off, making Endeavor pissed as he walked down to the training grounds quietly to go check up on you.

-----------------------------

BAKUGO

Bakugo at first was very intimidated by you and was kind of an ass towards you

He knew you had a really useful quirk and was kinda scared of that

He also was so terrfied because he was starting to get the first symptoms of a crush and was too stupid to even admit to it

Classic “I like you so Im going to be mean to you” situation

Wouldn constantly say you only got into UA because of your Dad’s reputation as a Pro Hero/ Teacher

Aizawa would hear about this and would be so mortified- he was worried this would happen when going to UA, and he was extremely angry at Bakugou

But he felt that if he intervened, it would make the situation worse and confirm the rude things Bakugo was saying

You also reassured him that you were okay (even though the rude comments hurt you slightly) but you’d get over it

It just made you upset that Bakugo didnt even want to know you- you thought he was kinda cute even though he could be rude

I fully believe Aizawa (in times of crisis) would consult Midnight and Present Mic for parental advice because its gotta be tough raising a child on your own

Midnight offered to put you and Bakugo together on the next training exercise, so Bakugo would be forced to talk to you and realize you weren't so bad

AIsawa thought about it long and hard and finally agreed- he was scared Bakugo would go and be a jerk to you, but he knew you were capable of dealing with his antics

When Midnight read off the pairings that day, you were both mortified- you because you would have to be stuck with the hot head that hated your guts, while Katsuki was freaking out inside

He was going to act like an idiot around you- what the hell was Midnight thinking?!

Once you two got in the mock city set up for the training exercise, you couldn't even say a word to each other

‘All Bakugo grunted out was, “Just stay out of my way.” and trudged off

“You idiot!” you called out, “we have to work together or we fail-”

Just then, the exercise started and a giant training robot was coming after you- Bakugo feebly tried to blast it, but his flames were too short to even reach the monster

‘Let me help!” you called out, reaching for his hands- you quirk only worked if you could touch the person.

He shrugged off your advances- Jesus Christ if you saw he was getting flustered-

“Hell no!” he yelled out in panic, “Im not letting a little prick like you-”

You grabbed his face between your hands, letting your Quirk transfer to him and making his cheeks bright red

You had never even seen Bakugo so speechless- he looked like a deer in headlights

“Use your quirk!” you yelled out, hiding behind him- you didnt know how powerful his quirk would become, but with experience, you knew it was about to become intense

He shook his head, trying to clear himself of the feeling of your skin on his- it was intoxicating, even though it was only for a few seconds- and why was your presence so irritatingly calming and distracting at the same damn time?! 

His heart was beating so fast, feeling your frame hiding behind him

He smirked, feeling you quirk course through is veins, and raised his arm to shoot a blast of fire at the machine

Instantly, a gigantic explosion of flames leaped out of his hands, shocking him

He instantly grounded his feet, trying to keep up with the power coming out of his hands

The blast went farther than anything he had ever produced (even his signature AP shot), licking up the side of the machine and burning it to a crisp

He looked at his hands and back at you, his heart thumping as you grabbed his shoulders in happiness and wrapping him into an impulsive hug

“We did it Bakugou!” you yelled out cheerfully

He just couldn't stop staring- why did you look so goddamn pretty?

“....Thanks...I guess your quirk is good enough for UA....”  he mumbled out, looking away from you as he said it

You stared at him in shock- did he just- compliment you?

You two instantly won the training exercise, and after that, Bakugo neve bothered you- in fact he kinda just ignored you, like you didnt even exist

He just still couldnt get over the fact that you had touched him, and how he felt when you touched you, seeing those pretty eyes of yours stare into his-

One day Kirihsima caught Bakugo staring at you as you sparred with Izuku, obvious fury in his eyes

“You okay man?” he asked, sitting next to Bakugo

All he did was grunt as the obvious blush grew 

Kirishima would not STOP bothering him to ask you out after that- it was so annoying to him

“Can you shut up? I dont like her?” slowly turned into “Okay you ass I get it I need to ask her out!”

You were always the last to leave class, since you always talk to your dad before you go off to lunch

And Bakugo took note of this

You had thought that the hallway was completely empty, only to see Bakugo resting against  a locker, his arms folded and his head slumped down

“Hey Bakugo!” you greeted kindly, a little nervous- you really didnt know where you two stood as far as relationships go- were you enemies, rivals, acquittances, friends? 

With Bakugo, who the hell knew.

 “Mr. Aisawa is in classroom if you needed help with something, sorry I took so long-”

“I actually-” he gulped slightly, stuffing his hands into his pockets, “I wanted to talk to you.”

Your heart started to pick up in speed- what was this all about?

“Uh, sure, what is it?” you asked politely, walking closer to him. You grabbed onto your backpack strap, gripping hard- you felt like you could float away at any moment, your nerves making your body go haywire.

“I know Ive been an ass,” he started, “and I havent talked to you much, but would you- maybe-uh...uhm..shit!” he cursed as he fumbled on his words, his cheeks a cherry red

You giggled, your face now too hitting up- was this really happening? Was he really going to ask you out?

‘Are you trying to ask me-” you started, but Bakugo instantly cut you off

“Shut up baka I was going to say it!”

“Say what, exactly?” Right at perfect time, Aizawa walked by, standing in front of your two blushing faces, asking in a colder tone than usual.

Bakugo instantly cursed everything in existence- why the hell did his teacher, your dad, show up right now?!

You two both stared at him, not knowing what to do- 

Aizawa was practically staring daggers into Bakugo- fear riddled in Aizawa’s stomach. Bakugo, the most arrogant boy in his class, liked you? He say you as his sweet, innocent little girl- would this hot head destroy that image of you? And a boy who was so cruel to you- you looked ready to even say yes to him after everything he called you!

He had vaguely remembered having a conversation like this with Midnight, in which she tried to explain that most boys who had crushes would react to them with anger in which to cover up their true feelings

To be honest, Aizawa thought it was a boat full of crap until now- now he realized this was why Bakugo had terrorized you so much- but he couldn't get over the fact of how rude he was to you so many weeks back

“Bakugo, I suggest you go to lunch before I send you to the principal’s office for using language like that on school grounds- especially towards my daughter,” he stated cruelly, his eyes cold and menacing. 

Bakugo stared at him, debating whether to yell something back at him- but thinking better of it, he merely just sulked, it taking everything in him to keep his mouth shut.

“Come, y/n, I’ll pick you up something up to eat from the teacher’s lounge,” Aisawa commanded softly to you, just wanting you to stay away from Bakugo for as long as possible.

As you were walking behind Aisawa, you caught a look of Bakugo sulking, looking absolutely defeated

Your heart broke for your crush, and right as your eyes met, you turned around, walking backwards slightly to mouth him a quick ‘Yes” and a smile, watching as a small grin form on Bakugo’s red cheeks

Yeah, your dad did not agree about it at first, but after he realized Bakugo loved you as much as he did and was ready to protect you with his whole life, Aisawa’s walls did melt - slightly

----------------------------- 

(RULES  | MASTERLIST| REQUESTS OPEN!!! :))

[catboyithaqua]

Ramuda and Doppo :0

OH MY BOYS LETS GO

Under a cut bc long

Ramuda Amemura

First impression

Baby boy baby. Very cute and sweet i love characters with ramudas aesthetic i tend to want to protect them, especially since its an aesthetic that i fall into myself and lo v e so kseidjsnfn YEAH this man is baby!!!

Impression now

Ohhh my god i love this man i love the way he is characterised he is so incredibly interesting as a character and tbh so realistic and honestly i adore him!!! I alarmingly see a lot of myself in him tbh, were incredibly similar and that isnt necessarily a good thing!! But still i love this man

Favorite moment

Oh man where tf do i BEGIN there are so many ngl, but mostly all of the moments where we see ramuda's humanity. There is still a sweetness left under the darkness, there is still a man who wants to cling onto everything he has - his emotion, his internal battles, his morality vs his desperate need to survive - oh fucking man so much.

Idea for a story

CAN WE FUCKING. HAVE RAMUDA TALK HIS SHIT OUT PLEASE can we just have others actively helping ramuda cAN THIS MAN PLEASE BE SHOWN THAT ITS NOT TOO LATE FOR HIM,,, PLEASE,, i just want ramuda to finally talk out everything and have people on his side. Please.

Unpopular opinion

This probs isnt unpopular by any means, but idk what else to put here so take this:

I dont really see it often discussed that yknow ramuda is an abuse victim. Like, its very clear that chuokhu uses and abuses him, and his life is constantly being hung over his head. No wonder the dude is doing anything he can in order to survive, he has no choice in that regard. Before i get told this in the notes yes i know this doesnt excuse the things hes done!!! But tbh i really think that like the trauma that ramuda is living with kinda needs to be addressed.

Favorite relationship

I am a huge multishipper and have found a way to ship ramuda w just about most people (that are adults and not in chuokhu lol) so this is pretty tough

Id say either fling poly or jkrm and these are my reasons lets go:

Fling poly: HAVE YOU S E E N THEM do i really need to say more here all three of them have such good chemistry together, theyre all clearly on the same wavelength and have such a wonderful dynamic,,, they found out about the clones and shit and they STILL chose to protect ramuda and to fight for him and with him and to stay by his side aND BLACK JOURNEY TOO I-- IM GONNA START SOBBING,,,

Jakuramu: this one is not based on canon too much i am sorry this is mostly hc but i am a huge sucker for enemies to lovers ok also, i feel like out of TDD these two would be the ones to reconcile. After all, jakurai is a rather empathetic man and he probably would def understand the situation that ramuda was in. After all this dude was an ex assassin, if ramuda was to tell him everything, im sure that he would be able to relate to yknow the time he took others' lives, people with families and friends that he killed because he was ordered to and most likely had no other choice. Of course, jakurai is well within his right to not forgive ramuda for what happened to yotsutsuji, but i feel like he would and would help him get out of the situation hes in,,, and also im soft for the TDD era ok like how jakurai WANTED TO KNOW THE REAL RAMUDA AND LIKE,,, even when ramuda snapped at him he was GLAD HE WANTSD TO KNOW HIM FUCK MAN,,, i just really like these two ok

Favorite headcanon

I have quite a lot of hcs! Here are a few and like some explanation as to why:

- hes trans - i personally believe this bc personally itd make sense. Ramuda has a very feminine appearance and build, those that are like typically common in asian countries. As well as that, he has his own autonomy unlike the other clones. It wouldnt surprise me if chuokhu orignally wanted to make a girl to keep the other divisions in check, but when he decided personally that he didnt want to be such a way, they said sure, more room for us to treat you as we want to. Hes got money, getting T wouldnt be that difficult for him either, so thats why his voice is. That way fiaudjsnfnd anyway i think it makes sense!! Idk--

- he has bpd - projection probably but the biggest inspiration for this headcanon is how he is emotionally. His swings are violent - he feels and expresses such a diverse range of emotions and its so easy for him to change his emotional disposition - whilst also mostly feeling totally empty. Relationship wise also, given how he was genuinely really close to jakurai and then completely splitting on him, h a t i n g him. Yeah that sounds like bpd to me chief i know i have it!!! Theres more ik there is but i cant pull up examples rn

- hes neurodivergent - again mostly projection honestly and like there isnt much of a canon basis in his behaviour, just little things, but i like to personally hc that aside from eating candy to stay alive duh, that he chooses lollipops bc they serve as a sort of stim?? Also ik that fashion is his job but hes also so so clearly passionate about it that its a special interest for him, and thats partially why he took it up as a job in the first place, so he could do something related to his special interest lol. Idk i know there isnt any basis for this but just let me have autistic ramuda iaiesjdnsnfn

Doppo Kanonzaka

First impression

Now THATS what i call a tired mf!!! This dude has yves saint laurent eyebags also he really reminds me of aggretsuko somehow??? Im really not sure what it is

Impression now

Yeah i was def right with the aggretsuko comparison siaishsnshfb BUT I LOVEEE HIM i love him very much and i think this man really needs a break and is also very relateable i love

Favorite moment

As much as i love fp i absolutely adore the badass koments that doppo has including when he absolutely fucking obliterated fling posse sksjxnxncn also!! All of his little moments with hifumi i genuinely enjoy their dynamic its so cute

Idea for a story

Honestly i wanna see him slowly recover from the teauma that he has experienced because this king absolutely deserves it, and also from a practical point of view itd make this mf s t r o n g e r i also just.... long to see doppo happy honestly he deserves to smile!!

Unpopular opinion

I dont really have an unpopular opinion but saving like leaving this blank: as much as i absolutely adore jakurai and hifumi and their music (jakurai is my fave out of every hypmic character and i WILL drive this home), to me doppo just has the best music. Like, i love tigridia and BLACK OR WHITE so fucking much its absolutely unreal and all of doppos verses in every song are juust so fucking good. As much as i listen to you are, therefore i am on repeat every day of my life doppos music is just the best ✨

Favorite relationship

Again i am a huge multishipping bitch and i habe a few ships with doppo but in ahll honesty my fave is very clear - i absolutely adore his dynamic with matenrou as a whole and especially hifumi - his relationship with hifumi is clearly so special and it really shows how strong their friendship is, and in a ship sense i find it to be realy cute bc theres such a clear need for each other and that even if they clearly come at odds sometimes, at the end of the days theyre still clearly so close and i just,,, god doppo reallt deserves someone like hifumi in his life and im so glad that he has it!!!!

Favorite headcanon

Honestly i dont really think i have too many for doppo but given his general demeanor and his attitude, i personally hc him as demi. Yeah i know that sexualities dont have like typical personalities and such but i feel like given his anxieties around new people and how he clearly only really sticks to those that hes very close with, it makes more sense for him to be demi than any other sexuality to be quite honest - and this is also just pushing my hifudo agenda aiqiauansnssn but yknow!!!!

[abundanceofnots]

Ok so, I’m European which means when I wake up the new episode has been out for a few hours already so when I go on twitter or tumblr it’s already full of spoilers. This morning I decided to spoil myself because I couldn’t watch until after lunch and first thing first I saw people complaining about Ian not / physically / comforting Mickey on the bed scene and ngl I went “oh no, Ian, you had one job😞” BUT then I watched the episode and... why are some people so adamant on hating on Ian for no reason? First of all I think it’s pretty normal that Ian couldn’t genuinely understand why Mickey was crying over the man that made his life a living hell for years (he SAW and in part experienced what Terry put Mickey through) but then he sat on their bed to get closer to him and he was going to reach for Mickey (probably his foot/leg/thigh) for comfort and that’s when Mickey exploded and it was Ian’s clue to back off because it wasn’t what Mickey wanted in that moment. Why are people complaining when Ian stood beside Mickey all day, supporting him and comforting him, helping him out with things, hugging him and kissing him on the head, starting the singing because he saw in their bathroom scene that Mickey enjoys it and thought that it could have probably cheered him up in that difficult and emotional moment. You can see a little tear on Ian’s chin in the fire scene, probably because in part he knows what Mickey’s feeling because no matter what your parents puts you through, there must always be something, even just o n e little thing, that they did right and that for a second made you hope that it could all be normal. Ian was alone when Monica died and he had also just said goodbye to Mickey for what they thought was forever. But Mickey? He’s not alone and Ian’s making damn sure Mickey knows that. (And may I remind the bed scene that we haven’t seen yet of Ian tugging Mickey in a hug and Mickey acting all grumpy?). Sorry for the rant, I’d like to hear your thoughts as well :), it’s just that Ian has been an absolute dream this season and an amazing emotional support for Mickey and he doesn’t get enough credit for all he has done

Hello, fellow European! Staying off social media before watching the episode is such a struggle, I'm so with you.

I'm not on Twitter that much (look at me monaghaning my way out of this) though and only follow a handful of people here, so I don't see a lot, but I'm still curious what I'm in for, you know? Can't say it's always the best idea...

So yeah, I don't really see people complaining about Ian, but I do see people complaining about people complaining about Ian, if that makes sense. But if I did, I would for sure join the latter group because Ian's been nothing but sweet and supportive (and sarcastic, okay, but that's because other than being a husband, he's still got his own agenda--and that's good) for the last couple of episodes.

I'm actually so proud of them because they've clearly been working on their communication skills and you can see how well they know each other and can read each other's emotional cues. It's so wonderful to see.

(Sidenote: I've talked about my feelings re the bed scene here, and it's basically what you said, only in so little words ❤️)

[wonderlandandotherplaces]

so it’s six am, ive been awake for the last twenty four hours internally screaming at my dissertation (believe it or not from this absolute trash of a post & the six (now seven am) grammer, but i am months away from getting a degree in english lit/creative writing) so here is my first & last contribution to this fandom because im probably gonna get murdered for this absolute garbage.

okay so this all happened because i saw that caleb wore this cool ring on his ring finger & whilst it’s probably costume jewellery he wore it in several scenes so i kinda assumed that caleb either is or was married. i personally don’t think this dude is a straight & yes, his actual backstory in the show is probably gonna be quite tame (& better than this) but i headcanon that he has a ghost partner out there in the world. (or trapped somewhere its caleb, he inslaves souls his relationship probably isn’t a functional one)

so his ‘ghost’ partner in my headcanon is a dude for starters.

probably met doing something to do with entertainment, caleb was definitely some kind of performer & his partner could’ve been some kind of writer for a show/wrote songs possibly.

they were discreetly together before they died i doubt he was from a time where it was accepted because, from his outfits mans either really into the idea of looking as dramatic as he possibly can like an evil ghost gatsby (bitch, he probably was gaytsby) or he died a long ass time ago).

it wasn’t exactly an ‘official’ marriage, but they wore rings & they knew.

they either died together or separately. they could’ve been murdered, could’ve been killed by a plauge or they genuinely could’ve just died of natural causes (people died young back in the olden day’s, my ma said that if someone got to their late forties in the 70/80’s it was considered an old age)

they were ghosts for a while before the devil showed up. let’s say they were active ghosts with nothing much to do other than haunt people.

probably haunted all the new owners of their home because caleb & his husband didn’t like how new owners redesigned their home.

there’s different levels of haunting from them both: caleb’s husband ‘lightly haunts’ but caleb goes to the extreme then goes further.

at first, his husband is mildly annoyed if caleb somehow ends up killing someone because that blood is not coming out of the mahogany floors & just why are we murdering people now.

but after a decade or so he just goes a long with it because they just want to do everthing they can do as ghosts.

they just like some excitement in their existance & sometimes murder will be on the agenda.

they’re just living their best ghost lives & probably racking up quite a body count which is when the devil decides to pop by.

idk what he offers caleb but caleb’s partner isn’t there when this happens (because the devil has been keeping tabs & knows that caleb’s husband 100% reigns him in & would be skeptical of a deal) & if he was offered extreme ghost power, new digs (which he could choose the style of i always kinda picture the ghost club as a pg hotel cortez ngl probably because caleb reminds me of a pg version of will drake), infinite new outfits & just a lavish existance, i think he’d like the idea & agree.

the devil explains the terms (putting stamps on souls & keeping them inslaved, probably feeding them to the devil over time (idk how dark we want to go here) & caleb probably wasn’t even that fazed (he’s still a bastard)

so, husband returns & caleb explains that they’re being given this wonderful opportunity & just decides not to tell his husband the price (deep down he knows that his partner wouldn’t agree)

yes his husband is skeptical & is like ‘how did you do this, who did you murder now? & actually I don’t think I want to know.

let’s say that, partner actually thinks that they’re slipping away from this plane of existance & seeing as they don’t know what is after being a ghost, he’s willing to try something new.

so they get the ghost club. caleb has a hundred & one flamboyant name suggestions ‘to make a statement’ & it’s his husband who names it ‘the hollywood ghost club’

they fill it with entertainment, making sure it goes with the times but also honours ghosts of entertainment past.

whilst haunting (sometimes murdering) people was a decent pastime, this is their calling & they love it.

his husband writes some snazzy musicals whilst caleb keeps to his deal & does the less than snazzy soul inslaving work (discreetly)

his husband is of the impression that they’re just helping lost souls & that when they disappear it’s because they’ve found what they were looking for or were at peace.

caleb’s husband actually cares about the souls that pass through their club & finds joy in helping them learn how to haunt, how to use their powers etc.

he tries not to actually adopt the sad young ghosts he comes across.

it’s when he actually does want to adopt some ghosties that shit goes down.

because caleb tries to discreetly warn him that it’s not good to get attached because they’re inslaving these poor unfortunate souls & it blows up in his face.

because his partner wants to adopt some ghost kids because he thinks it would be great for all parties involved.

however, caleb is not into that idea & it becomes painstakingly evident that it isn’t just because he’s not that fond of the idea of raising/trying to dad kids/teens.

idk how, but caleb’s husband would find out (via willie???) & it would get ugly.

he knew that caleb probably did something dodgy but not something on this level.

caleb would be like ‘so you can excuse dabbling in murder but you draw the line at enslaving souls’

his husband would be so angry & disappointed.

they keep a distance from each other after that.

either his husband gives into the pull to the unknown & eventually vanishes into the void leaving caleb heartbroken.

or he starts trying to tear what they’ve built apart & the devil takes him out.

or he tries to take the soul stealing buisness out & the devil tells caleb he’s gotta take him out & because he absolutely could never destroy his own husband has imprisoned him.

or he’d either leave caleb & set up his own place somehow where he could care for & nurture innocent souls & that’s what he’s been doing, trying to ignore what his husband has been doing all this time.

until somehow someone (probably willie or someone willing to destroy caleb’s entire career) finds out about him & figures he could help take caleb down because he’s still hurt by what happened.

or if he’s imprisoned & julie is ready to slap caleb into the other side after everything he did to her himbos & nick, somehow frees caleb’s husband from where he’s been imprisoned.

despite his ‘bitch plz, like i care’ attitude, caleb does care & he is heartbroken without his other half.

probably wears his wedding ring from time to time (caleb does wear a ring on his ring finger during ‘the other side of hollywood’ i know it’s just costume jewellery but this is where this bullshit began)

either way, it’s angst all around & despite the fact that caleb thought that he’d at least be able to spend eternity with his husband, he’s ended up destroying it & now despite his facade the idea of eternity isn’t as exciting as it once was.

[sureuncertainty]

6, 8, & 20 for the ask game? :^)

aw hell yeah thanks!

(this got super long so i’m going back and making it more ADHD accessible sorry y’all)

6. What character do you have the most fun writing? 

Hhhh this one is so hard because I love writing everyone??? So it’s close, and changes depending on the day and my mood, but I’m gonna go with Kat, I’ve been really enjoying writing her lately, and I’m SO excited to write her more in my sequel.

Also as of now, Nyx is the least fun lol, their chapters keep giving me aggravation since they just. don’t think/talk like me at all, and it’s really hard compared to Avery’s chapters which just flow so easily (and end up ten times too long whoops)

8. Is what you like to write the same as what you like to read? 

Yeah pretty much although I haven’t found anything really much like The Silence Agenda, but I do like to read a lot of thrillers/mysteries and queer romance! I also read a lot of YA which makes sense since Sure Uncertainty is also a thing so overall yeah! I try to specifically seek out books that are similar to my writing so that I can be inspired! (and like. i write what I wanna read so)

20. Tell us the meta about your writing that you really want to ramble to people about (symbolism you’ve included, character or relationship development that you love, hidden references, callbacks or clues for future scenes?)

OH MAN SO MUCH.

let’s see... I’m including Sure Uncertainty Easter eggs in this draft of Silence Agenda which is really fun, but they’re like. deep lore lol. like for example, Avery’s supervisor at the library they work at on campus is named Mrs. Durham, and Durham was one of Emma’s old surnames i tried out before settling on Alldridge. I changed it though so most people wouldn’t get it. but i lOVE the idea of finding subtle stuff like that to tie my stories together, even ones that take place in totally different universes. 

also like. idk i feel like themes of identity have been emerging a lot more in this draft of Silence Agenda, specifically with Nyx and figuring out who they are, how they feel like they’re barely a person bc they’ve spent so much of their life just trying to survive, and especially at the ending, they don’t know how to move on because they don’t even know like... what they like???

like there’s this scene where Avery asks them about their favorite music/books/movies and they just draw a total blank because they don’t know?? they’ve never even had the luxury to figure that stuff out, so they’re trying to figure out what kind of a person they are, and it’s cool bc i feel like I’VE been figuring them out alongside them. ngl they were a really simplistic character when I created them, and they’re STILL one of the hardest characters to write/flesh out because I’m still getting to know them, even now. which is weird since they’ve always been a protagonist but it’s true

also like. can we just talk for two seconds about the way that Nyx and Kat are two sides of the same coin and how that’s going to be explored in the sequel because oh my god i could write for hours about that and i’m so excited to look at it. they basically just both deal with the same trauma in very very different ways, and I’m so excited to explore that and how they clash but then ultimately help each other heal in the second book (and third) and figure out how to communicate with each other.

idk communication is also just such a theme. it’s ALSO really interesting how my own experiences have so clearly shaped this draft, specifically in relation to drafts before it. like. idk after i was in a really unhealthy abusive housemate situation with people who did NOT fucking know how to communicate like regular people, it became even more of a big thing for Nyx and Avery. Because before they can move into anywhere even close to being together (romantically or not, the story is about their emotional growth and closeness)  they have to figure out how to communicate with each other. and they have these barriers (a lot of them informed by their neurodivergencies since they’re both autistic and Avery has ADHD) to communication bc of competing access needs and stuff (i.e. Nyx needs their space to be clean or they can’t think well, and they get anxious and stressed, but Avery can’t always clean bc of their executive dysfunction and the other stress in THEIR life). and that’s all such a reflection with my own communication barriers to people in my life and yes, a reflection of my relationship with my amazing partner @drama-dick who i’ve been able to like. figure that out with.

there’s just something so intimate about someone taking intentional steps and work towards figuring out how to communicate with someone, and how to understand them and where they’re coming from. ESPECIALLY from two people who have spent a long time on their own, who have both felt abandoned and rejected and alone (also hi again projection), and have decided just not to trust other people or even TRY to invest in relationships. for Avery it’s because they’re afraid of getting hurt again and for Nyx it’s because they’re afraid of hurting someone again (even unintentionally) but for both of them it’s bc they see themselves as intrinsically unworthy of love and that’s something that even just them being in a relationship by the end of the book can’t be a magic fix to. which is why i’m SOOO excited to explore them being together in the second two books, and how they continue to help each other grow (and how other people in their lives help them as well!!!)

okay that got super long i am so sorry. tl;dr - communication as a theme with Nyx and Avery relevant to my own experiences is really fucking cool. also identity as a theme with Nyx specifically and how Nyx and Kat are two sides of the same coin. all cool stuff

[firespirited]

hey i was just wondering...have you talked to detransitioned people & a variety? im not trying to be all "DEFEND YOUR ONE LITTLE TUMBLR POST!!!" but you posted specifically to say ""most"" people reidentify as nonbinary, and from the spaces ive sought being detransitioned myself & myself included that...has not been the case in what ive seen. again, just trying to open information up if youre interested in the topic! have a nice day!

Yeah, terf have their own detrans folks they trot out (usually titled "detransition + regret" or "I detransitioned and why you will too"), but there's a whole bunch of others. Actually the last detrans video i watched was promoted by a terf as "female without social pressures in quarantine realized she's been conned by the trans agenda" but when you actually watch the video it's a woman who transitioned socially and with T for 6 years but the acceptance she received from her family and friends and the push from the medical community to get surgery to pass helped her understand she was female but gender non conforming and that's OK. The sad thing about the video and another I saw this last month was that they felt the need to beg for almost 5 minutes to not be used as a case against trans people getting medical care. They just wanted to say that it's complicated and untangling your feelings about gender is a journey. The other thing i'm seeing a lot is people who say they're "Detransitioning" when they're socially transitioned but refusing to go further surgically or medically but i don't see how that applies since what they needed was community support, they got it and now they're doing fine or don't want to go through any pain to alter their body.

The youtube algorithm is designed to love conspiracy videos so it makes searching for 'detransition' a minefield of scaremongering about other people and a few 'I cured my autism/found jeebus and now i'm not trans': try "non binary + transition" instead, unpolished videos of just individuals just chatting to the camera. Look for non white people in the recommended videos and click around, look for stuff that isn't sensationalized with music and editing: you know real people.

I am not an expert but i’ve done an awful lot of reading about gender, rad fems and trans people over the years. If you’d like to share your journey that’s fine, if you want to tell people they’re wrong about something they’ve agonized about,  considered very carefully and will probably have to work for very hard... that’s a whole other thing. And yes most of the detransitioners from long term hormone or surgery chose non binary or gender non conforming or something appropriate to their culture. Some because that’s what they were all along and a few said it was because they didn’t want to pretend that they hadn’t been through a gender exploration, pretend they are fully cis and that box fits just fine. NGL you then end up in a whole new field of masculine and feminine identities with new names like neutrois and masculine of center and a whole new rabbithole awaits.