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deepspacenova · 3 months ago

Text

for fear that you find out how I'm imaginin' you

sylus invites you to a valentine's-themed event in Linkon City to help him acquire a a piece of jewelry he'd been eyeing... or does he?

➻➻ ABOUT | 2100 words. sylus x gn!reader.

➻➻ TAGS | mutual pining. daydreaming. valentine's day. inspired by hozier lyrics.

NOTE: Happy Valentine's Day from my corner of the world! xx This one's dedicated to my kindred spirit and fellow lover of hozier, mutual pining, and good ol', sick-to-your-stomach yearning @mythblossoms <333

The heart of Linkon City beat like a hummingbird’s wings, a light but invisible force that made the air feel like a kiss against your skin instead of a bite. Made the bustle of the city sound melodic rather than cacophonous.

Funny, how one day in February could be a pair of rose-colored glasses — slipped on by even the most cynical, turning their surroundings soft and sweet, if only for a day.

You stepped out of the elevator, still debating why you’d agreed to this in the first place.

Or, more accurately, why you hadn’t found a way to decline before Sylus effortlessly maneuvered you into being his date for tonight.

The invitation had come in typical Sylus-fashion — a late-night call, his tone coy and coaxing as he relayed only the vaguest of details. He’d been hunting a rare piece of jewelry, his chance to acquire it would be at a Valentine’s Day event in Linkon City that required a plus-one. You were coming with him.

“And you can’t invite someone else because…?”

“You’re the only person I trust to have my back in Linkon, kitten.”

Matter-of-fact. Little fanfare. And yet…

“And… I wanted to see you in the dress I bought you — the one you still haven’t worn?”

And yet every ‘request’ of his was coated in a helpless, almost longing undertone. It dripped with yearning and tasted like honey.

And you, in turn, became helpless too.

Now, hands hidden within the pockets of his trousers as he stood near the event’s entrance — a rooftop greenhouse decorated in a garden of pink and red — you proved yourself to be the worst person to have Sylus’ back, unable to tear your focus away from him long enough to notice anything else around you.

Despite being possibly the biggest outsider in the room he carried himself like a man who belonged, like a man who owned the room. And as his eyes trailed from your black-heeled feet to your pink-tinted cheeks like two ruby spotlights, he straightened, stepped forward, and wrapped your hand around his bicep like you were the person who owned him.

“I was starting to think you’d stand me up.” His voice was low and warm and just a little teasing.

"And throw you to all these bloodthirsty wolves?" You gestured at the mellow cocktail party in front of you and arched a brow. “The way you made it sound, if I didn’t show up, they’d be scraping you off the dance floor by midnight.”

He quirked those deliciously full, infuriatingly symmetrical lips. “It’s a good thing I have a beautiful and fierce date here to keep me in one piece.” His gaze dragged over you once more, slower this time. And though nothing outwardly changed about his expression, his voice infused more warmth into your cheeks when he murmured, “I knew it’d suit you.”

You fought against the pull of yourself, cleared your throat as every drop of you ached to surge toward its moon, toward him, and entered the room with as much poise and aloof confidence as you could pull together.

The flowers surrounding them were bathed in the light of candelabra stationed around the room. The air was thick with the tang of their perfume and the sharp din of a room full of business-minded guests. These weren’t just wealthy socialites; these were people who knew the game — dealers, informants, fencers, smugglers.

And they were all watching Sylus.

He’d played with this crowd long enough to know exactly how to charm, how to influence, how to make people feel like they were the most important person in the room while revealing nothing of himself.

To them, he was an enigma—a man with resources and influence, yet no verifiable past. They would’ve loved nothing more than to pick him apart. Which meant that any crack in his carefully crafted exterior of ruthless corporate tycoon would draw their attention like blood in water.

He knew how to keep himself possessive but detached. Light touches at the small of a back, gaze wandering when he passed over a glass of wine, no part of his attention ever lingering too long.

But you were more than a crack.

You were a fracture, an earthquake that threatened to shake him, split his chest open, and reveal the fragile, fluttering thing inside of him to the whole room with one glance. One blush. One breath.

Because tonight, you weren’t just a fixture by his side. You were something else entirely. The only scent in his nose, the only sound in his ears, the only sight in his dress.

He should have been focused on the man in front of him, the one he was here to meet, the one whose words he was supposed to be committing to memory.

Instead, his mind spiraled away from him, caught in a tailwind of hallucination.

One that captured the details of your rising and falling chest, your bitten lips, your shifting stance. Coalescing them into the feel of your hand is his when he’d lead you around the corner, away from prying eyes. When he’d feel the heat of your body flush against his own, your fingers branding the nape of his neck, the center of his chest, the waistband of his trousers.

When he’d taste your lips, your wine-tinged breath, the petal-soft skin of your neck beneath his lips. When he’d swallow your gasps and moans with panted, open-mouthed kisses.

When he’d press you into the low garden wall, hoard you in the corner to himself. Not like an object or possession, not you were something. But like you were everything.

Would you want that? Would you let him?

The man across from you both was still talking.

Sylus clenched his jaw, tried to redirect his focus. Forced himself to nod at something and offer a well-placed hum of interest.

But the words blurred as you pulled his attention taut like a rope, fraying it at the edges.

And Sylus wasn't sure he could keep it from unraveling completely.

The evening continued to pass in a blur of wine, small talk, and stolen glances. Sylus played his part perfectly, charming everyone he spoke to and keeping the attention firmly on himself.

But every now and then, you’d catch him looking at you, his eyes dark and unreadable, and you’d feel that same pull between you, the one that made it so hard to remember why this was such a bad idea. That you were a resident of Linkon City, not some anonymous figure who could disappear into the crowd if things went sideways.

If anyone from Linkon recognized you here, if they saw you with him—

Sylus leaned down, breath ghosting over your ear as the owner of Sylus’ mysterious piece of jewelry lead them to another group of tuxes. "Relax, kitten."

"You brought me here, remember?" you said under your breath. "If I get recognized, that's your problem."

"Hm." Sylus seemed to consider what you thought were very valid concerns, until he said, “It's a good thing you’re the only problem I don’t mind having.”

Though he kept his gaze forward, his lips quirked in expectation. Like he was trying to burn the paper-thin wall between you into wisps of smoke.

You didn’t want to give him the satisfaction of a reaction. You were already standing too close, already betraying yourself too much. In the way you had to keep forcing yourself to stop glancing at his face. In the way your palm kept tightening around his bicep. In the way your other palm itched to grasp his, which swayed gently between your bodies.

"You keep looking at me like that," he murmured, his voice a smooth, knowing drawl, "and I’m going to start thinking you enjoy spending time with me.”

Your amused scoff does nothing to banish the hot and fluttery thing that unfurls in your stomach. ”I’m looking at you like that because I’m wondering how much trouble you’re going to get me into."

His voice was all sand and gravel. “If I wanted you in trouble, sweetie, we’d be moving away from this crowd not closer to it.”

It was dangerous, how easy this was. How he always knew exactly what to say to keep the sound of your heartbeat echoing in your ears and make the rest of the world fade into the background.

"Besides there's nothing to worry about," Sylus continued, dipping his head just slightly, his breath warm against your temple. "No one here is paying attention to you."

You arched a brow, refusing to let him be the one to make you break character as the tuxes morph into men with voices and bodies and faces. "Except for you."

Again, no change in Sylus’ expression, but his final murmur before he greeted the new group was smug and wolfish. "You say that like I could help myself."

The conversation around you drifted in and out of your focus. A blend of polite pleasantries and measured negotiations that you only half-listened to, which, you supposed you should’ve been grateful for since it only strengthened your role as arm trophy.

Logically, you knew there were eyes on him—some curious, some wary, some openly hostile. Not everyone in this room admired Sylus. Some feared him. Some wanted him gone.

And yet. Despite knowing that keeping your distance kept you both safe, your thoughts grew increasingly more dangerous as you succumbed to the consequences of him.

You imagined Sylus’ hands in your hair, cupping your face and easing your legs around his waist. His voice a low murmur, you have no idea what you do to me, kitten.

You could almost see his shirt hastily unbuttoned and feel fabric bunched at your hips by rough, dominant fingers. You could almost feel his skin against your own, just as flushed, just as feverish.

His lips would descend upon yours, hot and insistent. Your eager fingers clutched at his nape, tracing the broad plains of his shoulders. Your chest could almost feel the expanse of Sylus’ chest pressed against yours until—

You clenched your fists, nails digging into your palms, desperately trying to detach yourself from the daydream. You had to push it down, lock it away, keep yourself in check. Because if you didn’t—

You might do something reckless.

Like, close the space between you. Let yourself forget what he was, what you were, and what it would mean to want him.

Your pulse pounded in your ears as you forced yourself to look away, to breathe. The heat in your skin, the ache in your gut — it was just the atmosphere, just the act.

At least, that’s what you told yourself.

And yet, as Sylus turned his head slightly, his gaze catching yours with something dark and knowing, you had a feeling he wasn’t fooled in the slightest.

The crisp night air did little to cool the heat still thrumming beneath your skin as Sylus led you outside. The sounds of laughter and clinking glasses faded behind you, replaced by the quiet hum of the city. A sleek black car idled at the curb, its glossy surface reflecting the glow of streetlights.

Sylus walked you to the back door and opened it, one hand resting on the door, the other slipping into his pocket.

“See? No troublemaking needed,” he murmured, his tone light, almost teasing. “We make a good pair.”

Before you could respond, something cool brushed against your skin. A whisper of metal sliding around your neck, the weight of it settling just above your collarbone. Instinctively, your fingers lifted to touch it—a delicate chain, smooth and fine, and at its center, a pendant that felt solid against your fingertips.

You look up at Sylus, brows knitting in question, but he only watched you with that same unreadable intensity he had all night.

“What is this?” you asked.

He reached out, his fingers brushing over yours where they rested against the pendant. “A gift,” he said simply. “I… hear you’re supposed to ask when you want someone to be yours on Valentine's Day.”

“You…” you exhaled in disbelief. “You planned this?”

“Silly questions don’t deserve answers, kitten.” His smile was all wicked amusement.

Something fluttered in your chest—part irritation, part something much more dangerous. “So, you didn’t actually need me to get this.” You gestured to the necklace, fingers still resting lightly against the pendant.

“No, that sale was made last week. Tonight was just a hand-off.” Sylus leaned in, close enough that his breath ghosted over your cheeks, his voice dipping into something nearly tender. “Like I said, I just wanted you to be mine tonight.”

A half-hysterical laugh bubbles up from your throat. “What if I’d said no? That I don’t belong to anyone?”

"It's alright," Sylus shrugged as if he’d already taken that into consideration, stepping back with one last squeeze of your waist.

“Wouldn't change the fact that I’m already yours."

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solifloris · 9 months ago

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xavier x mc hualiand coded u say......can you explain why im so curious

omg. omg anonie. are you familiar with tian guan ci fu (heaven official's blessing)..... hualian refers to the main couple of the book (hua cheng x xie lian) !!! in case anyone out there is trying to avoid spoilers for it i'll answer this under the cut 🥰 but they have a very very very beautiful love story, one that's been Ingrained in my head since the first time i read it. it's so whole and deeply rooted, and sincerely xavier and mc give off similar vibes. like SO. MUCH. probably more than any of the other LI's!

so this's going to talk about things like: the "fallen from grace" trope, the mirroring between xavier and mc, how xavier's love for mc transcends time, how all he thinks about is... her.

(i'm also going to talk a lot about xavier's myths (both lightseeker and lumiere) and maybe a lil bit of the no restraint card! so this'll be long...)

but so on the tgcf side: ESSENTIALLY the very basic explanation of hualian's love story is that hua cheng has loved and admired xie lian for more than 800 years. and it's a love that's very very deeply rooted. a love where xie lian becomes his everything.

THE OFFICIAL SUMMARY OF TGCF READS—"Eight hundred years ago, Xie Lian was the Crown Prince of the Xianle. He was loved by his citizens and was considered the darling of the world. He ascended to the Heavens at a young age; however, due to unfortunate circumstances, was quickly banished back to the mortal realm. Years later, he ascends again – only to be banished again a few minutes after his ascension. Now, eight hundred years later, Xie Lian ascends to the Heavens for the third time as the laughing stock among all three realms. On his first task as a god thrice ascended, he meets a mysterious demon who rules the ghosts and terrifies the Heavens, yet, unbeknownst to Xie Lian, this demon king has been paying attention to him for a very, very long time."

now, two things to understand are—(1) hua cheng was born an unwanted child, and (2) xie lian, the crown prince, has always had a kind heart. these are important to the story. because eventually it goes that hua cheng, who was unwanted and discarded and overall regarded as a disgrace, disgusting to look at, bad luck, etcetc., found solace in xie lian's kindness—his warmth. his light.

chronologically, as the story goes, xie lian, as a very esteemed crown prince of his nation, ascends to the heavens and becomes a 'martial god' (this gives him things like immortality and the ability to use magic). but his nation falls into chaos, and the long story short is that he absolutely fails to save it. instead, he ends up turning his own people against him. he falls from the heavens as quite literally a fallen god. ridiculed, no longer worshipped, despite how much love and praise he always used to get. and for several, several years, he has to deal with coming to terms with his past. there's a lot of quite graphic trauma here.

and now, hua cheng... he's been there through all of that. he's stayed by xie lian for as much as he could stay with him. he fought as a soldier for xie lian, died in battle for xie lian—and the thing about his death was that,, he didn't want to rest in peace afterwards. and when that happens—if you have a strong enough reason to remain, you take on the form of a ghost, starting out as a little ball of light (a "ghostfire") to eventually getting a ghost form.

so he stayed.

even as a baby ghostfire, until he got his own ghost form... he stayed. he's seen him get beat up, and hurt, he's seen him make the wrong decisions, he's seen him manipulated, and trampled on—he's seen him at his worst. but he stayed, because he wanted to. that might have been all he did sometimes, and xie lian might not have particularly noticed him then, but he stayed.

of course; it wasn't enough for him to just stay, not when it was all he could do, so naturally—he'd get stronger, right? they separate at some point, and hua cheng loses contact with xie lian for several, several several years.... but he keeps looking. he literally becomes the most feared ghost (a "demon king"), while xie lian essentially has been banished from the heavens to redeem himself.

and, what's interesting to note is that xie lian—always kindhearted, always meaning to do the good thing—is a lot morally different in comparison to hua cheng. it's not that hua cheng is a bad person, but just that he's willing to do more extreme things for xie lian's sake, especially now that he's plenty powerful. he only thinks of xie lian, while xie lian, as a crown prince, tended to be selfless and think more of the betterment of the general people. it's like a balance, or sorts? xie lian is able to act as his moral compass, in a way, because simultaneously hua cheng's ultimate goal is to make xie lian happy, and he wouldn't do things that won't make him happy.

regardless, they only meet again after 800 years, in the first arc of the book. during this time, like the summary says, xie lian had ascended once more, but still not very well-liked in the heavenly realm, and hua cheng meets him as he's sent to investigate a case. it's at this point that they grow naturally closer through various book events (because right now, xie lian doesn't yet know that this is the same little ghost, that one soldier, from the past).

the point is, though—xie lian had really become hua cheng's everything. he's been looking for him for that long. he's remained a ghost still on this earth for that long. because xie lian showed him a kindness that no one else would when he was ridiculed... and now, hua cheng is returning the favor.

from the start, being by xie lian's side, hua cheng has always been promising "forever". and he's been keeping that promise. xie lian believes it.

at its core, tgcf has always been a story about a fallen god and his last believer.

and the following quotes really bring out how deeply rooted their relationship is! the book is very beautifully written, and hualian's relationship flourishes under this kind of writing. they're quotes that will stick with you a lot.

“If you don’t know the meaning of your life, then make me that meaning, and use me as your reason to live.” (xie lian, in the past, to the hua cheng who wanted to give up)

“To die in this battle for you is my greatest honor.” (in the past, soldier hua cheng to xie lian)

"i pray to never rest in peace.” (hua cheng to xie lian, when xie lian finds out he is a ghost)

“I have a beloved who is still in this world, I want to protect them.” (in the past, ghostfire hua cheng to xie lian)

”To watch with your own eyes your beloved be trampled on and ridiculed, yet be unable to do anything. That’s the worst suffering in the world.” (hua cheng to xie lian)

“To me, the one basking in infinite glory is you; the one fallen from grace is also you. What matters is you, and not the state of you.” (hua cheng to xie lian)

“If I could, I would have you use me as your stepping stone, the bridge you take apart after crossing, the corpse bones you need to trample to climb up, the sinner who deserved the butchering of a million knives. But, I know you wouldn’t allow it.” (hua cheng to xie lian)

“If your dream is to save the common people, then, my dream, is only you.” (hua cheng to xie lian)

“Only after having met you did I rediscover that it’s such a simple thing to be happy.” (xie lian to hua cheng)

“There’s no banquet in this world that doesn’t come to an end, but I will never leave you.” (hua cheng to xie lian)

“I will be back. Your Highness, believe me.” (hua cheng to xie lian)

“‘Forever’ exists. There’s one person who can truly achieve it. I believe.” (xie lian about hua cheng)

“He believed that this man would die for him again and again, and would be reborn for him over and over. Even if he fell into the depth of hell, he would break through the abyss for his ‘belief’.” (xie lian about hua cheng)

“Last time, they spent eight hundred years running towards each other. This time, it only took an instant to fall into each other’s embrace.” (about hualian)

“I am forever your most devoted believer.” (hua cheng to xie lian)

so how does this relate to xavier/mc?

WELL I'M GLAD YOU ASKED! 🥰

(1) in relation to xavier's lightseeker myth.

i talk a lot about this in more detail here! but a lot about xavier is very deeply rooted into his past, as the prince of philos.

in this sense we can compare him to xie lian—princely duties, tasked to care for a nation, a lot of responsibility on his shoulders... but unlike xie lian, these are duties that he doesn't want. he doesn't accept them. he'd rather not, thank you very much.

however—what exactly did his experiences as the crown prince give him? xavier, like i've talked about many times before, was forced into a role he didn't want to be in, essentially having his identity chosen for him. it's identity foreclosure. and this leads to: (a) difficulties with commitment, (b) weaker sense of self, (c) lack of confidence, (d) weaker mental fortitude, (e) self doubt and low self esteem issues. this is where he's comparable to hua cheng; both of them had identities forced onto them that lead to an onset of insecurities. it's where you have no choice but to ask yourself questions such as: who am i, really? who do i want to be? am i doing enough? am i enough?

because you never feel enough.

and combining both factors with xavier—the pressure to do his best and be the best, all that burden of responsibility that he never wanted... with all the insecurities that manifest as a result of that?

just like hua cheng found solace in xie lian's kindness towards him, xavier finds solace in the freedom that mc grants him.

(2) ”To watch with your own eyes your beloved be trampled on and ridiculed, yet be unable to do anything. That’s the worst suffering in the world.”

this is hua cheng's quote!

but doesn't it remind you of how upset he was over philos mc being labeled as the sacrifice? so much that it tore his relationship with his father more than it had already been torn? so much that it would be the breaking point for him to step back from the throne entirely?

xavier, in that moment, had to make a choice. he felt the need to do something; he couldn't just sit back and watch his beloved be treated that way. he was aware they weren't seeing mc as a person anymore, and he didn't like that—that's his beloved.

(3) "No matter how many times it takes, and no matter where you are, I'll find you."

pretty self-explanatory, right?

we're all familiar with this. that anecdote broke our hearts. we know that xavier is willing to wait for mc, to look for mc, to love her in ever universe and in every timeline—

he'd wait for mc for 800 years, too, if he had to. just like hua cheng.

it's a promise for forever—that his love for mc transcends the bounds of time and space, that... his forever belongs with her. he wants it to belong with her. and he hopes that she wants that, too.

(4) Fallen from grace.

similarly to xie lian's situation, in a way!

I feel that this is not necessarily a topic talked about a lot regarding xavier, and i may or may not make a separate post about it in the future... but his storyline is definitely some variation of this trope.

maybe it's not outright obvious; xavier isn't a god, after all. but... he is a prince.

he was a prince.

he was the crown prince of philos, set to inherit the throne, set to lead his people.

he's not anymore.

and maybe that was a title that meant little to him, and one that he definitely intended, wholeheartedly, to relinquish, but—at this point, he doesn't have the favor of his people, whether it be the general philosians, or even the (majority, it seems?) team of backtrackers that he's lead to earth. and with losing that title, like i have talked about before, again—means losing his identity. an identity so strongly associated with being a prince, with being a leader... it's gone, now, because that isn't who he is. it might not have been who he wanted to be, he might have been so averse to it, but it's always been part of him. losing the title means losing a piece of himself he can't really go back to, only that it sits there with him now at an awkward angle.

unfortunately for him, this was always the xavier that he's known mc to love—all of him, all of his identity that he's shaped around being the prince of philos, that's the xavier he knows mc loves. he's not quite sure if this mc will love the xavier he's changed into. so "fallen from grace" to him refers more to the fact that—will mc love me like this?

(5) MC is his everything.

and this point goes across virtually all possible cards of xavier's, and all possible events, and all possible moments—any interaction that he's had with mc.

mc is his everything. just like to hua cheng, xie lian is his everything.

he doesn't think about anything else. he doesn't care about anything else.

even our previous point—about the fallen from grace trope—is centered more on mc herself, than the rest of the people he's dealt with.

we can legitimately go through all of his cards and pinpoint how this is.

precious bonfire. he joined the camping trip for mc. he notices mc prioritizing the rest of the team more than herself. he plays the game because she's playing it. he'd drag mc away to rest with him instead of joining the bonfire event. he's only thinking of her. fluffy trap. we know how this unfolds—he legitimately let her do whatever she wanted. he saw what kind of booth she intended to drag him into; the setup, the costumes she wanted... and he let her. for her. to make her happy. fragment of time. less obvious, maybe, but it's still there—he had her on his mind when he wanted to complete those 100 steps, too.

heartstring symphony, unique aftertaste... prime examples of how he'd virtually let mc do whatever she wants, whether it be to reprimand him for getting injured again, or drag him around fo a little holiday. he's basically freely indulging her in her whimsies? and heartstring symphony quite touches a lot on his promises to her to take care, and how he misses her when he's away... etc. it's still... all about her.

romantic afternoon. he generally helps her with her sleeping problems—again, centered around her. faint sensation. he's trying to get her heartbeat to rise because of him—again, still centered around her. even tender nights. he's attentive to her needs, notices her heels aren't comfortable. that conversation they have by the bay proves meaningful; he wants to share that special moment with her, and he wants to reassure her somehow that he does—that he's thinking about her. that he always does.

then some more obvious ones, like 21 days (which i also kind of talk (yell) about here), and no restraint (which i talk about here).

and we get to the myths—the lightseeker myth. how he's willing to go to the ends of the earth just to find a way to ensure she won't be sacrificed. how he's willing to completely abandon his post... for her. not for the people, but for her. the lumiere myth, and the whole essence of lumiere being lumiere. how it's lumiere who saves mc not once, but twice. how in this myth, xavier pushes his limits to the point of exhaustion multiple times, all for mc.

and that's just the five-star cards. but in every single one of them... he's always thinking about her. centered around her. that if he's the stars, the moon, the planet—she's his sun. and he would gladly orbit around her. she's all he needs.

“If your dream is to save the common people, then, my dream, is only you.”

xavier might as well have been saying that to mc herself.

he doesn't care about anything else.

(the event is proof of that too!)

(6) Mirroring.

I mention this first here!!

and there is so, so, SO much of it throughout all of his cards and interactions with mc too, because it's founded on his love for her... and the love she returns back to him.

xavier who is willing to do anything for her. xavier who would prioritize her, think of her, love her—at the cost of himself. he would love her in every universe. he would love her no matter who or what she becomes.

he doesn't know how to receive the same in return.

yet, we know that mc does exactly that.

she does return it.

in regards to the lumiere myth, i talk about it a lot, too: "i think what's most beautiful about the lumiere event is like? she's not even trying to belittle his feelings of jealousy? she'd tease, yeah, but i think the gist of this event, and the myth, was mc still trying to convey that—she'll love him no matter what, even if it's lumiere, even if it's the him that he isn't fond of, himself."

and you realize that the entire theme of their storyline is "i will love you no matter who or what you become"—they say it to each other. they convince themselves of it.... that they love each other just that much. that they're willing to do whatever it takes.... for each other.

that they mirror it.

“To me, the one basking in infinite glory is you; the one fallen from grace is also you. What matters is you, and not the state of you.”

doesn't it sound like a line they would repeat to each other?

(7) Moral compass

this goes back to, again, how MC is his everything—and, conversely, how “If your dream is to save the common people, then, my dream, is only you.”

for a prince, xavier isn't one who necessarily prioritizes others—he's not a hero, he's not the chosen one, he's not.... someone who would sacrifice the world for his people. he's not like that.

i think that there's a lot of selfishness that's embedded into him because he precisely does not want to be a prince, and he's always been extremely averse to this role—that kind of aversion sticks with you. it's hard to take things seriously when the hatred is all you can think about.

but like hua cheng, it doesn't make him a bad person.

it just means he has other priorities, which—happen to be mc. because everything he's ever done, again, is for mc. everything. always. and sometimes they're selfish, sometimes they're a little extreme or hard to understand... but the fact is that, well—everything is about her.

it goes without saying, then, that xavier isn't the most morally-aligned person out there.

because mc, as we know, is founded on justice. on protecting the people she loges, protecting thevpeoole around them—she became a hunter for that purpose. she took on the throne for that purpose. she helped the backtrackers for that purpose.

“If your dream is to save the common people, then, my dream, is only you.”

it's starkly different for them.

mc would act on the behalf of others, xavier would act on her behalf. all he's ever looked at was her.

yet at the same time, it means that—like hua cheng and xie lian—xavier's ultimate goal is to make mc happy. he won't do anything not to make her happy. he doesn't want to upset her.

so he'll go along with her wishes, enough so to genuinely think positively of his actions too—because it's what mc wants.

and i think that's it—it is all i can think of—but xavier and mc's relationship perfectly capture the essence of hualian that i've always associated them with each other, and perhaps that's why mc and xavier also mean so incredibly much to me ... because hualian does, too.

and granted all of the LI's have aspects that reference hualian as well—not to mention, sylus being incredibly hua cheng coded—but imo xavier/mc truly comes closest

and maybe it has to do with the sheer devotion that comes with xavier and mc

that it feels really... close

BUT ANYWAY THIS WAS LONG 🥰 AND UH 🥰 YEAH 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰

#i got this ask yesterday and had this whole thing drafted LMAKFNSNFB #anonie i hope you enjoy...........😭😭😭😭😭#xavier/mc never beating the hualian allegations 😭😭😭😭#xavier #lnds xavier #lads xavier #l&ds xavier #love and deepspace #love and deepspace xavier #love & deepsoace xavier #lndthonks 🌹

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