#needless to say i have still yet to get over the season 2 finale

[historicallyaccuratecheese]

god I hate how brutal pipe murder is actually becoming funny to me now. …i’ve hit rock bottom. or ascended. I don’t know…

[tizeline]

1-I've fallen in love with your Tiz Sep AU, especially how you made Mikey the problem child with the hardest redemption arc out of the 4, because normally it's not Mikey who gets that role (Cause he'll always be a sweet kid no matter what dimension or universe or faction he's in<3), so I'm really interested to see how Sep Mikey and Sep Donnie finally reconcile and become closer<3<3<3<3

I'm glad you're enjoying the AU :D! And I'm still trying to figure out how the events of the movie is gonna go down in the AU, but so far this is what I've come up with (though keep in mind this is subject to change)

So it's during season 2 that all that drama between Mikey and... basically everyone else in his family gets really intense, but he does end up mostly reconciling with Leo, Raph and Draxum during the season 2 finale (don't know the details yet, just that it's gonna happen). With that character development, Mikey also grows more accepting towards humans, he still doesn't like them but he's also not trying to destroy them all so that's something!

But Mikey and Donnie just can't seem to get along, in the time leading up to the invasion they're just stuck in this constant state of animosity. Raph and Leo certainly try to mediate, but it's almost like Mikey and Donnie don't want to get along. It's kinda one of those situations where it doesn't really matter why two people started fighting, cuz now they're been fighting for so long and about so many things that it feels impossible to even try to make peace.

So then The Foot get the Key, which in the AU happens because Donnie and Mikey can't stop fighting for two fricking seconds and they screw up the mission. And then each of them blame the other for the mission going wrong, which just gets worse when Casey Jr shows up and warns them about the Krang and goddam these two are being annoying. STILL! Despite their less than ideal relationship, they have started genuinely care about each other, and they both feel guilty about losing the Key, so when Mikey sees an opportunity of getting the Key back he goes for it (like canon!Leo did). And when Donnie sees that Mikey is about to get fucking skewered by the Krang, he jumps in front of his little brother and shield him with his own body (like canon!Raph did).

The story from here on out is not as thought out, but needless to say Donnie gets captured and "krangified". I'm kinda thinking that instead of the Krang just making him a soldier like Raph was, they instead hook Donnie up to the Technodrome or something? And after being freed from the Krang's control, maybe Donnie can still take control of the Technodrome himself to pilot it back through the portal. Cuz ya know, they still need a way to send it back into the prison dimension and the other turtles can't connect to the TD because of their hard shells. I did have an idea of potentially making April pilot the thing lmao, but I also have a headcanon that the only reason Donnie could pilot the TD at all was because he has some Krang DNA in him (empyrean), which April obviously doesn't. So Donnie will still probably be the one to send the TD back into the prison dimension.

In the AU, I imagine that Leo and Raph are still kinda dealing with the whole leadership-issue throughout the invasion haha. It's not nearly as dramatic and hostile this time around, don't worry! But I love the idea of Leo and Raph becoming co-leaders, only problem is that they're still trying to figure out what exactly that looks like for them. It not a huge issue when they're doing small-scale missions, but with how intense and stressful the invasion is, they're kinda struggling figuring out how exactly their dynamic should look like.

But back to Mikey, he obviously feels guilty as fuck over Donnie sacrificing himself for him and he's not handling very well. Mikey having lost access to his mystic powers is also really getting to him considering how heavily he relies on them. Leo's drama with Casey Jr in the movie is in the AU replaced with Mikey's drama with Casey Jr. Mikey is initially pretty cold towards CJ just because he's human, when Donnie gets taken Mikey decides to direct his hurt and anger at CJ because... well... he's human! And he didn't properly warn them about the Krang! So obviously it's somehow his fault that Donnie got taken! Somehow! It's very weird for CJ to interact with pre-character-development-Mikey acting like a petty brat about the whole situation, he's hurt by it but also quickly just grows very annoyed at Mikey's hostility towards him. And then we get That One Scene where CJ yells at Leo to get his shit together, except of course this time it's him yelling at Mikey haha.

Anyway, then Mikey DOES get his shit together, and he manages to help Donnie break free of the Krang's control by giving this big heartfelt speech about how he's sorry about how he has been acting and he wants to befriend Donnie and become real brother, you get it. But Mikey still feels guilty about everything that has happened, and to add on to that he still kinda has main character syndrome lol. Point is when Raph, Leo and Donnie all get knocked out of the fight and it's only Mikey against Krang One, he pretty quickly decides to sacrifice himself if it means defeating the Krang. It goes down pretty similarly to how Leo did it in canon, Mikey can fly so he lures Krang One into the prison dimension and is able to restrain him there long enough with his chains to convince CJ to close the portal.

So then the question is - how the HELL does he get out of there??? Mikey opened up the portal in canon, which is gonna be hard for him to do in the AU if he's being beaten within an inch of his life by Krang One haha. But I do think I've figured it out, so Leo and Raph at this point in the story have unlocked their Hamato Ninpo but Mikey hasn't, because their Ninpo is fueled by like... the connection to their family, and Mikey doesn't feel very connected to his Hamato ancestry before this obviously. But what if this is the moment where he doesn finally unlock his Ninpo! After both Donnie and Mikey proved their dedication to each other through their sacrifices, Mikey finally feels connected to the Hamato family. The way I imagine this scene is that it's not just Mikey creating the portal, his brothers are reaching out to him with their Ninpo and Mikey is able to reach back, even while in different dimensions. They're able to establish a familiar connection and because of that a litteral connection is formed through the portal, and Mikey is brought home.

Lastly I wanna talk about Donnie, specifically the uh. Injury he gets from the Krang when he shields Mikey. I actually drew this really quick sketch of that moment a while back but I never posted it here so I might as well do it now! It's not super gory or anything, but Donnie's shoulder got a little but fucking impaled and also there's blood so I'm putting it underneath the read more thing

Haha remember when I said this this AU was gonna stay mostly silly goofy? Teehee!

Anyway, I can't really decide if I wanna make Donnie just lose his enitre arm after this because lol. Lmao. But the reason Donnie doesn't like die from blood loss right after this moment is because the Krang goop is sealing up the injury, both when he first gets captured and interrogated, as well as during the time when he's under Krang control. After he's freed, he's mostly only able to help in the fight by piloting the Technodrome up partway through the portal, maybe he's able to like act as support in the fight against Krang One by using his Ninpo? But yeah no he basically gets benched as soon as his brothers get him back because he's still quite injured.

But look on the bright side, Mikey and Donnie both being on bedrest after the invasion gives them PLENTY of time to bond! :D Like sure, they showed how far they're both willing to go for each other during the invasion, but they've still got a lot of bad blood to sort out afterwards and them both being stuck in medbay kinda forces them to deal with their problems haha. So yeah, while the invasion is the catalyst for them making peace, it's mostly during their recovery that they properly bond with each other. (Prepare for B-Team cuddles, it WILL happen!)

And you asked about specifially when Donnie loses his immunity towards Mikey's puppy dog eyes, and I'd imagine it's during their recovery. Not only because they're growing closer, but also because his baby brother is INJURED and SUFFERING and to Donnie's horror he quickly realizes that he is unable to say no to Mikey now haha XD

HOOBOY that's basically everything, I still have to figure out a lot of the details, but writing this all down made me realize that I've figured out way more of the plot than I initially thought, so that's nice!

[ineffable-suffering]

The Curious Incident of The Flaming Sword in Good Omens

Just like so many other Good Omens red herrings, hints and *Aziraphale voice* clues, the question of 'What the fuck ist the deal with Aziraphale's flaming sword' has been absolutely tormenting my mind ever since S1 dropped all those years ago.

And while many of my other questions about S2 (like 'What the fuck is the deal with the Eccles cakes' or 'Who the fuck made the Gabriel statue') remain unanswered and could, possibly, just not matter at all and I should just get the fuck over them– the unsolved case of Aziraphale's flaming sword in S1 has always seemed like a weirdly important blind spot to me.

So, in an attempt to finally solve this knot in my brain, I made a timeline for the bloody Flaming Sword because what else would I spend my Friday evening on. Here goes nothing, I thought:

Aziraphale gets issued the sword by Heaven to guard the Garden of Eden in 4004 BC, and gives it away to the humans.

God asks him about it right after they humans have left Eden, Aziraphale lies to her and before even finishing speaking, God just loggs off and doesn't seem to care anymore.

The sword seems to be lost for the next 6000 years to follow and, once again, no one really cares.

The first time we see it again is when the International Express Man delivers it to War in the present day.

The next time we see it after that, is when Pepper effectively kicks war in the shin, makes her drop the sword and proceeds to anihilate her with it.

Brian and Wensleydale do the same to Famine and Pollution.

Aziraphale then wields the sword once more, despite never having to really use it (but hey, it looks capital-B Badass).

Lastly, our Holy Delivery Guy then picks up the sword together with the other (now deceased?) Horsmen's artefacts and they once again vanish.

Needless to say, I found myself nothing the wiser after making this timeline. It seemed completely useless. I still had no idea why the sword even existed and why they kept making such a big fucking fuss about it all throughout Season 1. So, I decided to make another list, this time with all the random ass questions I had about this random ass sword:

Why was it issued to Aziraphale in the first place? Since when does an angel need a random flaming weapon to protect two (2) humans that are already being guarded by a hundred-meter-high wall, when he could very well just miracle away any and every threat to both himself and them?

Was he given the sword to defend himself against demons? If so, why would they give him a burning blade instead of, for example, a Supersoaker full of Holy Water? (Sure, I'm fairly certain Supersoakers hadn't been invented yet, but you catch my drift)

Is the sword actually burning with hellfire? If so, it would a) still be a pretty useless weapon against demons, but also b) possibly explain why Pepper, Brian and Wensleydale were able to kill or at least temporarily get rid of three of the four Horsemen of the Apocalypse (who, be they whatever they actually are, surely count as some sort of immortal entities just like angels and demons do)

Did the sword actually kill War, Pollution and Famine? After all, the World as we knew it did get reinstated by Adam again once they managed to stop Armageddon. Does that mean that the three Horsemen were revived again too? Unless Season 2 takes place in a war-less, pollution-less and famine-less world, they must have somehow made their return (or never really died in the first place)

Where. The Fuck. Is. The Sword. Now? And why does it bother me so much???????

Alas, just like so many other questions, these too seemed to remain unsolved. And since the fucking sword didn't make a comeback in S2, I guessed that it probably just wasn't more than ... well, a randomly flaming, randomly misplaced, randomly unexplained Flaming Sword.

Nothing more than a plot device.

Hmm, right. A ... plot device.

Hang on. (And that's when it finally hit me.)

It's a fucking plot device.

Most authors and consumers of media are familiar with the use of plot devices in story telling. However, I personally had only every seen characters be used as such, to merely bring an important point across or further underline or advance a story's or main character's development or plot.

It wasn't until I was about to simply give up because I couldn't see my way out of the seemingly unlimited sword-related questions anymore, that I realized: There are no answers to those questions. Just like there are no deeper meanings to any other plot devices. Their sole purpose it so shine some light onto another, more important thing, story or character.

And in this case, that character is Aziraphale. Or more so Aziraphale's choices and his relationship with and belief in God and Heaven. The Flaming Sword (or more so Aziraphale's giving-away of it) is the first way of showing us that Aziraphale:

doesn't always aka pretty much never obey God's will (even all the way back in The Beginning),

will lie to God about disobeying Her

and possibly, just like Crowley joked about, was the one who by trying to do a Good Thing, accidentally gave away something that would later somehow become a literal War weapon, lmao

It also tells us that:

God apparently doesn't always care or cast them out of Heaven when an angel actively disobeys and lies to Her. Or, for all we know, Aziraphale giving the sword away and not admitting to it was somehow part of Her Ineffable Plan anyway.

Heaven is apparently absolutely useless at keeping track of its very few ethereal belongings. That's what you get for outsourcing work, you capitalists.

Right at The End, the sword returns to its owner who had it right in The Beginning too: Aziraphale. And not just that: It actually ends up saving the humans. For the second time. First all the way back in Eden, when it was just Adam and Eve. And now, 6000 years later, at what would have been the end of the World. Very poetic, *wipes away tear*

So yeah, there you go. That's the big revelation I have come to. Would I have preferred to uncover yet another sneaky Gaimanian easter egg just so I could wave it in your face like some sort of a puzzle solved at a scavenger hunt?

Sure.

But hey, sometimes flaming sword plot devices are just that. And I'll make my peace (or War?) with it.

[arsene-inc]

A week in the life of a TTRPG addict (19/08 - 25/08)

Published a game

I publiseh another one page rpg : Chaos at Cosplay Con

Cosplayers have been taken over by their costumes, gaining their powers. The players are the only that are still themselves, despite gaining powers. For now...

I Played

This week, I played Knight. The end of the big, big campaign prelude. A big recurring boss. Its final battle to save Art itself ! Getting tired of the players rolling over some fights, not pulling punch. Then a player did 100 damge, counting the resistances and armor, a big 40% of the boss health in one go. needless to say, they saved Art. Now, due to how the ttrpg club is scheduled, the campaign is on pause for a season. Time plenty to modify every monsters and boost them. also read the rules, may be useful as the gm.

I was supposed to gm session 2 of a World wide wrestling mini campaign. Sadly a player out of 3 just didn't respond. Waiting for more news on them before deciding to continue with two or to search for additionnal players.

Receptions

This week, in the cart there was : Here, there, be monsters; Brave Zenith and Salamandur household, a setting supplement for Pacts & Blades that really needed it. Since I only received them Friday, I haven't read them yet. I started Brave Zenith cause i love a settting with playable jellies, and mixologist as a class.

I also completed my Knight collection with the Nodachi Supplement, instead of mecha-knight, here comes the mecha-samurai. And not ttprg, but tcg, since i published TCG oracle, I received my pledge for Altered TCG. Really Nice art, love the difference between common, rare and unique versions of cards. But I miscalculated. With the pledge came a display of boosters. So i thought Hey let's buy an album for al these cards. I too, the 360 cards version in the kickstarter. Except...the display is 37 boosters, each with 14 cards. This doesn't math. Luckily I had an other album with some place in it.

I read

I love the Shangri-La Frontier manga. Already reread it several time. So to check a rpg that could play this, I read DotDungeon remastered by snow again. I love the interaction between the real life of the plmayer and the mmo characters. Things based on how many piercings the player have, their tattoos. The goal of exploring a world. Really want to play this

[ibelieveinghost]

5/20/24

for whatever reason i've been avoiding posting on tumblr these days i don't know, but i made myself coming back to post something.

needless to say a LOT had happened. i magically got my interview back, so another chance to try my luck this Friday. what's more unexpected is that i hit my head really, really hard: 1.5cm laceration, a ton of blood, and 5 stitches. god damn. been trying to explain to people how this whole injury thing happened and it's so funny... because i was just sitting around working on my laptop, and casually fell over the chair+landed my head on the sharpest corner in my room which is that one end of my bed frame... like who just did that?? sober??? the nurse straight up asked me if i was drinking and i was like... no madam i was submitting my resumes in a really serious manner...

anyway. as a result i can't get my hair washed for 3 days now, and won't be able to do so for another few days. so things have been literal hell lately. u just can't get much done w/ dirty hair!!!!

beside the interview(more like the very idea of having in soon constantly on my mind) that has been consuming me and the stupid ass head injury, i am doing...decent! not super motivated and forever sleepy, but able to get most things done and stayed positive through some really shitty days.

dunno if i mentioned it here yet, but i finally watched twin peaks. i made it to the first few episodes of season 2, but it was too creepy for me just the way i thought. i love it so much tho... in another life i wish i'm not this easily startled. had to slept with my night lamp on the night i watched S2E1... the scene at the very end............................................🥺

...guess i'll get back to the prep now. still a lot more to do, but this time there's enough time. okay! not another word! moving on! get something done before bed tonight!

spirits, gods, dear ancestors--help a good gal with her earthly duties this time please? getting this full time/all ENG position means the world to me right now... and i been working my ass off for this since last November.

（ok i went back to the last entry and reread my rant. fine, yes. ultimately, this is not what i want. but it is what i NEED. i need that job to stay, to set my foot on a path that lead me where i ultimately want to be! so yes, yes i dislike shinagawa-area and corporate culture with a passion, but i am 100% whole-heartedly wanting/begging to work for a year or 2 so i can get the whole visa concern out of the way.)

ok peace out! really need to work now

[crystalelemental]

Sync Pair Retrospective - Winter 2022

It has been one year since Jasmine alt. The Magnezone that was her birthright has gone to a Variety Thorton alt instead. My crops are withering. The winter is bitter and cold. Let us forget the present, and reflect on a better past. "What about the Lodge alt?" She's shitty BP Clemont, let's not pretend this is satisfying.

I feel like this really kicked off the start of interesting seasonal picks. Jasmine and Whitney were great, and then Dawn and Lisia on New Years, into the Hoenn stuff. Palentine's was okay. Yes, I'm still mad about Appletun going to Mallow instead of Cheryl, I feel this was a tremendous missed opportunity. But for the winter picks, man, nothing was better than getting my girl Jasmine, and the first alt for another Johto leader.

Winter Jasmine Winter Jasmine came in as a defensive support that can boost crit rate, which is real fucking bold when following up Aura Cynthia. Yet fascinatingly, Jasmine...has a serious case against her. She mimics the Potion support and defensive backbone, option for Endurance and Gradual Healing effects instead of the immediate +6 to bulk, and drops the Fighting Zone for applied Supereffective Up Next. That's right, we finally got the second Support pair with SEUN after Classic Red. Needless to say, Jasmine's my second favorite character, Red is currently my least favorite, I have a preference, but I'm still gonna argue she's superior.

Crit is applied team-wide, Potion is better than Mini Potion, Stalwart/Unbending combo, ability to boost either offensive stat by +2 thanks to Mega Evolution, ensured paralysis compared to his baby bitch rate, and stupendous bulk that already outperforms him at base, but grows to over 400 in both defenses at level 150 EX. Jasmine's a monster of a tank.

If there's any hangup, it's...the same issue Classic Red faces: SEUN as your main contribution locks to on-type clears, which is painful when faced with off-type. She's harder to generalize to off-type clears in CS for fun, was a rough time in High Score outside of partnering with Marnie for Power Trip, and locks herself into particular partnerships with Gauntlet. And considering that fact, you have to ask...how much of a hit did she take from Dana being F2P and having this same trait? Dana having SEUN to apply at will, and being effectively free as a Master BP pair, means Jasmine faces stiff competition. Why pull on the horrendous rates these old seasonals get when you have Dana right there to cover that offensive niche? If you just needed defensive support, there are others that generalize better. SS Morty has better speed, Aura Cynthia offers insane Fighting-type utility. Then there's the ongoing issue of defensive supports that don't do much for offense, but cater to an offensive need like SEUN. Hope you like being locked to self-sufficient buffing pairs!

Jasmine's combination of traits are fairly unique, but they also leave her in a slightly awkward position. I still love her, I think she's fantastic, but it's hard to deny that she sometimes fails to stand out to me, as someone who really likes to off-type.

Winter Whitney The All-Terrain Sawsbuck is here, providing any of the three terrains with her trainer move, depending on the MP remaining on Move Gauge Boost: Grassy at 2MP, Psychic at 1MP, Electric at 0MP. With some fun team-wide buffs/debuffs depending on the field, as well as a nice 60% flinch rate in Headbutt and self-healing on Horn Leech, Winter Whitney is an incredibly fun pair.

That is super hard to work with. 2MP is her limit, and in order to manipulate terrain options, she has to use an otherwise useless move. Getting to Electric Terrain in something like Gauntlet is a fairly rough time. Her sync nuke is solid, but as off-type becomes harder and harder to achieve in CS, Whitney's falling further and further behind as an offensive threat. And it's not like there aren't other terrain options. We're getting eggmons with those effects now. Yes, she has her debuffs alongside them, those are nice, but it's...at least a little bit awkward.

Consider her best pick: Grassy Terrain. Having SS Acerola should be a godsend. She debuffs defense of all foes, while Acerola provides the Terrain boost and PMUN stacks! That's great! Well, except SC Steven can do everything she does but better. Electric Terrain gives speed control, but SS Hau gets Terrain up easier, extends the effect, and has double the speed control power of Whitney. Psychic is cute, I like the Sp Def debuffing/buffing, that's fairly unique, but Lucian exists for the debuffs and speed buffing is more valuable. It was always just kinda hard for Whitney to seriously stand out.

Whitney is a fun pair, but not an effective one. She has interesting traits that are a ton of fun, but is seldom the best pick for any particular job. I like her a lot, but I can't say that the additions in the last year don't just...do better than her entirely on the comps she'd want to support.

[tierneysodegaard]

Baby Pink - Max Verstappen x Reader - Part Two

Read Part One here

Max Verstappen x female!reader

Requested? Yes/No

Anon: omg baby pink part 2 where Max is learning to be a dad😍

Word Count: 3.7K

Warnings: Fluff, sexual innuendos, Christmas (yes I know it’s June but it fits), Christian Horner, swearing.

—

Max had moved in with you and Leia he had managed to win over Leia rather fast, she evidently was happy that she finally had a dad in the picture rather than just you. Now that the season had ended Max didn’t have work until March unless you counted the odd practice races and meetings. Needless to say, Max had stepped up to his role as a dad rather well. You told him about Leia’s schedule and her morning and night routine and for the first time since she was born, you didn’t have to wake her up or take her to day-care. She had one last day-care session before Christmas, normally she would stay there for a few hours in the day with other children so you could work and since Max had moved in with you he would take her. 

Max had left your shared room to get her ready before coming back to say goodbye to you. “Say goodbye to mummy!” Max held her hand as they entered your room. Thankfully Max had cleared away the mattress he was sleeping on. You had refused to share a bed with him when he moved in so every night he made sure to lock the door so Leia couldn’t come in and see her parents sleeping separately. She didn’t know what really happened between you and Max and hopefully, she wouldn’t have to find that out at all especially as you and Max had been working to get back to where you both wanted to be.

“Bye bye mummy!” Leia smiled as Max picked her up and placed her on the bed so she could say goodbye to you. With a smile, you sat up and kissed her cheek. 

“Goodbye darling, enjoy your last day.” 

“I’ll see you when I’m back.” Max leaned down and lightly kissed your lips before handing you a small box and a bag. “Breakfast is in the bag and there’s an early Christmas present in the box for you.”

“Max you didn’t have to -”

“Oh and these.” He handed you the biggest bunch of red roses you had ever seen. “I won’t be long.” He winked before picking Leia up off the bed, carrying her away in his arms as they both waved before shutting the door. 

You let out a soft smile as they walked off before turning your attention to the gifts Max had given you. In the bag was a number of pastries from the bakery just down the road from you. You smiled at the note he’d left. 

Be ready for when I get back, I have a day planned for us. I hope you enjoy your gifts. 

Max 

You moved to open the box that he’d also given you only to find a stunning Van Cleef & Arpels necklace. The clovers were all a beautiful red colour, the pair of you weren’t even official yet but he still bought you gifts that were worth more than your kitchen. 

“You’re doing good so far Verstappen…” You muttered as you bit into the pastries. 

You followed Max’s instructions and reluctantly pulled yourself out of bed to get ready for the day he’d planned. Who knows what he’d planned, knowing your luck he’ll just be driving you around in his car all day at stupid speeds but something told you otherwise. You set your thoughts aside as you got dressed just as you heard the front door unlock indicating that Max was home. 

“y/n?” Max called out for you.

“I’m in the bedroom.” You called back as you took the necklace out of the box. Max quickly strode inside the door, smiling when he caught you holding the necklace. “Can you put it on for me?”

“Of course.” He stepped behind you, taking the delicate chain in his hands before helping you move your hair out of the way. “Do you like it?”

“I love it Max, thank you…”

“Anything for you…” He whispered. You could feel his hot breath on the back of your neck as he brought the chain in front of you, placing it on your neck as he carefully fastened the clip, his fingers gliding across your skin as he did so. Once he’d done his task he let his hands fall across your skin as his lips pressed small kisses on your neck. “So beautiful…” 

“Max…” 

“Can’t believe I let you go for that long…” He started to move his lips up to your jaw. “God I’m an idiot.”

“Yes, you are.” You smirked as he lightly tugged on your hair, making your head fall back onto his shoulder. A sly grin spread onto his face as he watched how submissive you would become around him. “What are you smiling up?” You caught sight of his face as he loomed over you, his lips ghosting your skin. 

“After all these years you still go submissive for me -”

“Oh piss off -” You pulled away, scrunching your face up at his words which only made him laugh. 

“You didn’t deny it.” His hands went to your waist, slowly backing you up against the wall. “I’ve really missed you y/n.”

“So much so you left me and your daughter without you for years.”

“I know…” He rested his forehead against yours. “I’m sorry…”

“You’ve done a good job at apologising, so far.” You pressed a small kiss to his cheek. “Leia loves you -”

“And do you?” He cut you off. 

“You’re going to have to work harder than just buying me a necklace and looking after our daughter.”

“Then get your shoes on because we’re going out.” He stepped back, leaving your skin on fire at his touch. 

— 

Max had taken you to the local Christmas markets, there were only a few days to go before Christmas and the magic of the season was slowly taking over. You smiled as the pair of you walked past all of the stalls, your eyes going brighter at the sight of the lights on all the trees. 

“Have you ever been here before?” Max asked as he sipped on his hot chocolate. 

“Nope, I’ve walked past it with Leia before but I always thought she was too young to bring her in here, besides there are a lot of people here and I’d rather I didn’t lose her. Daniel and I took her to watch the Christmas lights last year.”

“Does he visit often?”

“Most weeks yes.” You looked over at him. “Why’s that?”

“Just wondering, I always asked after you but he never told me much.”

“Good lad.” You smirked. 

“Did he ever speak about me?”

“Not really, I always knew how you were doing because of the races.”

“You watched me?”

“Every single week. It hurt at first, I did it more for Daniel than for you but I knew I was lying to myself. When Leia got older she started to pay more attention to it and really liked it, probably doesn’t help that Daniel would come over and tell her all his stories and not to mention you’re her father.”

“Runs in the family.” He winked. “I already know what she’s getting for her birthday in May.”

“You do realise I have to have a say in what she gets as well this is a joint thing.” 

“Then we’re going to get her a go-kart.”

“Are we now?” You raised your brows. “If she gets hurt you’re the one that’s dealing with it.” Max let out a small laugh, wrapping his arm around you, pulling you into his side. 

“That’s fine by me although I won’t let her get hurt, her dad is a world champion, she’ll be learning from the best.”

“Learning from the best?” You smirked. 

“Yep.”

“Didn’t think you’d let Lewis Hamilton teach our daughter that -”

“I beat him in front of our daughter!”

“Just.” You smirked. As you tore your gaze away from him your eyes landed on a games stall, with a giant teddy as one of the prizes. Max followed your gaze and his smile grew. As teenagers, the pair of you would go to carnivals and Christmas markets and every single year you always tried to win the biggest teddy up for grabs but every single year you were unsuccessful… until Max stepped in.  

“I’ll win it for you.” Before you could say anything Max had already walked towards the stall. He was handed three balls and all he had to do was knock as many pins down as possible. In typical Max Verstappen fashion, he won you that giant teddy your eyes were glued to. “Could Lewis win you that?” He turned back to you to wink before taking the teddy from the stall owner. “For the love of my life.” He held it out to you.

“Very bold words.” You took the teddy from him despite it basically being the same size as you. 

“I mean them.”

“Good.” You smiled, leaning up to plant a kiss on his frostbitten cheeks. 

The pair of you walked around the rest of the markets, at a first glance anyone would have thought the pair of you were a couple on a date, completely in love with one another and maybe that was true. As much as you didn’t want to fall for Max this quickly you found yourself smiling at the small things. The way he stepped up to his role as Leia’s dad so naturally just made you fall in love even more. 

—

Christmas eve was here faster than you thought it would be. Leia was more than excited that Santa was visiting tonight. She had her Christmas pyjamas on as she was laying in Daniel’s arms with you and Max on the other side of the sofa. Daniel was staying with you and Max for Christmas as due to Covid rules he couldn’t fly home to Australia to spend the holiday with his family. The four of you were watching The Grinch, Leia and Daniel occasionally breaking the silence with a laugh. The tree was glowing as the fairy lights sparkled in the darkness. The house was decked out in decorations thanks to Max who helped you finish the house whilst Leia was at day-care. 

“You getting tired angel?” Max called over to Leia who was slowly drifting off. She nodded, looking over at her parents, even Daniel looked as if he was falling asleep. 

“How about we put out treats for Santa and the reindeers and then you can get some sleep? The sooner you sleep the sooner Santa will be here.” Her eyes lit up at her words, unlike Daniel who was slowly falling into a deep sleep. 

She climbed out of Daniel’s arms and ran into Max’s. Max picked her up as the three of you went into the kitchen. Max set her down and handed her the milk that was in the fridge. “Are you going to pour it in the glass for Santa?” Max asked. 

“Yeah!” She called back, slowly pouring the liquid into the glass. 

“That’s it…” Max steadied her hand as he watched her. “Well done.” He smiled as she finished her task. 

“Now how many cookies do you want to give Santa?” You asked. 

“Six!” She laughed. 

“Six?” Max laughed alongside with her. “Santa is a lucky man… how many can daddy have?”

“One!”

“One?”

“Yes for your one trophy!”

“I’ve won more than one trophy! You can see them around the house.” Max was almost offended at her words whereas you tried your best to hold back a laugh. 

“I’ve only ever seen you win one!”

“You watched daddy on the TV, mummy told me that.”

“I didn’t see you in person.” She shrugged. 

“How many does mummy get?”

“Three!”

“Why does mummy get three and I only get one?”

“Because it’s mummy!”

“Mummy does deserve more than three though.”

“But then they’ll be none for Santa!”

“I won’t eat that many!” You joined in. “Shall we go put them by the fireplace?” Leia nodded, holding her arms out for Max to carry her back to the front room whilst you balanced the plates and glass in your two hands before setting the treats down so she could inspect them before bed. 

“Are they good enough for Santa?” Max asked.

“Yes!” She yawned after she spoke which earnt her a small laugh from you and Max. 

“I think it’s time for bed princess,” Max spoke. “Whisper goodnight to Uncle Danny.”

“Night night Uncle Danny!” She waved despite the Australian being fast asleep. 

Max and you took her to her room at the end of the hall. You pulled back the covers so she could slide inside before Max put them over his sleepy body. He leaned down and kissed her forehead. “Goodnight baby.” He smiled as she attempted to speak back but sleep overtook her. You followed suit, kissing her forehead before turning on her night light. 

“Sleep well, angel.” 

Max laced his hand in yours as the pair of you left the room, shutting her door silently so she didn’t stir. “She’s perfect,” Max whispered. 

“She is a little star.” You looked up at him your hand still in his. “She’s happier with you here you know.”

“I’m happier being with the two of you.” Max turned his head slightly to catch sight of a sleeping Daniel. “And him I guess.” 

You giggled at his words. “He’s done a lot for us.”

“Oh I know, I owe him a lot.”

“You do indeed Verstappen.” Kissing Max’s forehead you headed back to your shared room and started to set the presents out, with Max’s help. He even left her stocking at the end of the bed so she had something to wake up to. Daniel was still fast asleep on the sofa as Max helped himself to the food Leia had left out for Santa meanwhile you placed a blanket over the Austrailan so he wouldn’t get cold in the night. 

“Are these the cookies you made?” Max asked as you made sure Daniel was comfortable.

“Yeah why?” You looked back at him. 

“Should open a shop.”

“Maybe I could of but I had a child to raise.” You smirked before turning the lights off, leaving him to follow after you. 

“You never lost your whit.” He smirked alongside you, following you through your bedroom door. 

“I’m aware, lets hope our daughter has it too.” You grabbed a shirt to sleep in, getting ready for bed. You were in the bathroom when you heard Max take out the mattress he’d been sleeping on. 

Fuck it. 

“Max?” You poked your head past the EnSite door. 

“Yes my love?” 

“Put the mattress away.” You smiled. “I think it’s time we start sharing a bed.”

His eyes lit up like Christmas lights. “Are you sure?”

“I’m sure.” Turning the bathroom light off you got into bed as Max started to get changed. 

He removed his clothes and was eventually just left with his boxers on. You shouldn’t have stared so long but you did. The last time you’d seem him properly was when the pair of you slept together. He was still as beaufutil now as he was back that. No wonder why you forgot protection. 

“Are you okay with me dressed like this?”

“Max we made a baby together I think I’m fine with you just in your boxers.” You smirked as he turned the light out, sliding into bed with you. 

“Thank you…” Max whispered as he wrapped his arms around your torso, pulling you into his chest. 

“For what?”

“Having me back so fast. After what I put you through I certainly don’t deserve all of this.”

“You’re right.” You replied, catching sight of his blue eyes in the darkness. “But Leia needed you here and so did I. You worked to get back to what we should have had. You’ve been a dad to her, you didn’t just lay about. You proved to me you want this -”

“I want all of this, I want to take Leia around the garages, I want her to sit in my car and cheer me on and I want you. I want us y/n and I’ll do anything for you back. Name whatever you want and I’ll give it to you.”

“I just wanted you Max. I wanted you during the entire pregnancy and when I gave birth to her. I wanted you to be there but you’re here now and if you plan to be here until the end then that’ll get me back.”

“I’m going to put a ring on that finger and I’m not letting you out of sight from now on, especially when I know Charles fancies you -”

“Fuck off does he?” 

“Told me if I didn’t worship the very ground you walked on then he’d make sure Leia saw him as a father.” You burst into laughter at his words, raising your hands to your mouth as you fell into his chest even more, trying to suppress the laughter. “It’s not funny!” Max pouted.

“Yes it is!” You looked up at him. “You know Leia actually liked Ferrari -”

“Yeah well she’d growing up a Red Bull fan from now on.”

“Daniel won’t like that.”

“Tough.” He winked as your clock signalled that an hour had passed. Max turned his head slightly, seeing that it was now midnight. “Merry Christmas darling.” 

“Merry Christmas Max.” You pecked his cheek before the pair of you fell into a deep sleep, not that you’d get much sleep with a three year old who was incredibly excited for Santa to arrive. 

—

“Mummy! Daddy!” A sudden loud voice and a jumping child on the bed woke you and Max up.

“Santa came!” An Australian accent also made the pair of you sit up faster. Daniel came strutting in with a Santa hat on, clearly not caring that the two of you were basically nearly naked in bed. 

“Look mummy!” Leia held out a small box.

“What did you get baby?” You held your arms out as she came and sat in your lap. 

“It’s from Uncle Lando!” She smiled, tearing the paper which revealed a miniature version of Lando’s helmet with a note attached saying 

Dear the future of F1,

Merry Christmas! I hope Santa brings you everything you asked for!

Don’t forget Uncle Lando when you start beating your dad at karting. 

Love from Uncle Lando x

“Little shit…” Max muttered under his breath.

“Max!” You nudged his arm as Leia continued to open her gifts. 

“What? He’s brainwashing her to like McLaren.”

“Maybe McLaren is the better team.” Daniel joined in. 

“You know that isn’t true.” Max glared his way. 

“Can we please not argue about Formula 1 at Christmas.” You looked between the pair of them. 

“Daddy! Look!” Leia held up a model of her fathers car. 

“Who did you get that from?” Max asked, smiling as he looked at her present. 

“Your boss!” 

“That was sweet of Christian, suprised he even knew who she was.”

“Belive me, he knows.” Daniel smiled. 

“Sweetheart should we go to the living room so you can open your other presents?” Max collected the paper from the sheets. 

“Yes!” She got up, giggling. Daniel picked her up, gathering that the pair of you needed to get changed before you came out to the living room. He took her out of the room but not before sending a wink to Max, knowing his plan. 

Max jumped up, grabbing a his grey tracksuits before throwing them on whilst you threw on some comfy shorts. You went to your bedroom door when Max grabbed your wrist, pulling you back into his body. With one hand on your hips and the other of your cheeks he looked deep into your eyes. 

“It might be too soon but if there is a God up there I hope he grants me a Christmas miracle…” He whispered as his lips grazed yours. “I want you back y/n please… y/n…” he took a deep breath. “y/n can I be your boyfriend?”

A small smile left your lips as you grabbed his face pulling him down so his lips could connect to yours. The kiss was long overdue. You always found yourself staring at him, wishing you could have him like you did now. Max swiped his tongue against your bottom lip, deepening the kiss as he pulled your hips into his. His grip on your body tightened as the pair of you kissed one another like it would be the last. 

“Mummy! Daddy!” Leia’s yells made the two of you pull back, Max looked down at you with a smug grin. 

“Is that a yes?”

“Yes it is.” You pecked his lips before calling back to your daughter. “We’re coming sweetheart!” 

Both you and Max quickly darted out of your room hand in hand, waltzing into the living room where your daughter was sat by the tree, holding a box bigger than her in her lap. “Who’s that one from?” Max asked. 

“Santa!” She yelled, tearing away the paper and pulling open the box. She gasped as her tiny hands pulled out what was in the box. “Mummy look!” In her hands was Max’s Red Bull helmet. “Santa got me a helmet! It’s just like daddies!” 

You and Max were sat on the floor opposite her, holding your arms out so he could fall into them. She handed you the helmet, watching you trace your hands over her fathers helmet he’d worn when he’d won the Championship. 

“Want to put it on?” Max asked.

“Yes!” 

You handed him the helmet as he slid it on her head, evidently it was far too big. “You’ll grow into it baby.” Max kissed the helmet. “You see this?” He pointed to the visor. “This protects your eyes, and this right here,” He pointed to just inside the helmet. “Is where I’m going to have a photo of you and Mummy so you’re always with me.” 

You smiled at the way he interacted with his daughter. Your family was whole again and little did you know she really did grow into the helmet and even wore it when she started her professional career. Max also kept his promise and put that ring on your finger and who knows, maybe the pair of you will have another little racer in the family. 

At least he’d be there for the entire journey this time around. 

[theroomofreq]

can you give me muggle jily recs pleaaseeee <3 :D

HOW MANY HIGH-QUALITY MUGGLE JILY FICS ARE THERE?? TOO MANY TO COUNT. *cracks knuckles* BUT I am here for the challenge. Jily AUs are my JAM.

Again, shoutout to our amazing @jilyarchive friends who tag every wonderful muggle jily au they come across. here is the link that will take you to their tags page. You'll find links to specific tropes and AUs :')

I've searched through my own AO3 bookmarks and history tabs, and I present to you 28 jily muggle fics that I LOVE. I am THRILLED thinking about all the good things in store for those that read these wonderful stories. This list took me ages to make because I went through and reread most of these brilliant fics. Happy reading !! xx

properly improper by @lizardcookie

“Marry me,” Mr. Potter repeats, closing the distance between them by striding back up towards the sofa, only to stop and crouch to one knee right there at her feet, looking up at her. Burning. “Pick me,” he elaborates. “Pick me, choose me, love me instead.”

- this fic is the reason why I comment the way that I do (spoiler it's because it's amazing)

The Wedding Ring by @mppmaraudergirl

What is undeniably worse than attending your sister's wedding looking as desolate and forgotten as a wilted houseplant? Drunkenly ringing your ex-boyfriend and asking him to be your date.

- SOBS UNCONTROLLABLY AT THE PERFECTION

Oh my god, they were ROOMMATES by @magic-girl-in-a-muggle-world

Silly one-shot, Muggle AU with Fem!Jily as pining roommates and Marlene as their matchmaker.

- the fic that brought me back to jily and inspired my deep obsession of fem!jily

Swipe Right, Swing Left by @downn-in-flames

The unspoken rule of using dating apps in D.C. is that you always start with where you work.

James Potter, it seems, never picked up on that one.

- giddy just thinking about this gem

'Tis the Damn Season by @petalstofish

It doesn't feel like Christmas for Lily Evans, not after losing her parents to COVID before the Holiday season. She anticipates spending Christmas all alone until a boy from her past shows up and offers her a mutually benefiting deal that has her calling him 'babe' just for the weekend. 'Tis the damn season, after all.

- cries in respect for lyrical writing

Watch Me Unwind by @maraudersftw

Lily Evans hates her job, hates the bigoted customers she has to serve as a bartender at the richest club in the city. But the one person who makes bearing all of it worth it has someone else in his arms tonight. (Rated: M)

- obsessed with the way the plot jumps around the time line in this

oil be there for you by @abby10fanfic

Texting/Social Media AU: Lily and James haven't spoken for 2 years. But that's all about to change thanks to Peter and his involvement in an essential oil pyramid scheme. Featuring boss babes, toxin-free lifestyles, binding contracts, and a very oily journey.

- YOU WOULD NOT BELIEVE HOW FAB THIS IS

a matchmaking mission by @downn-in-flames

James Potter has a mission: get Sirius Black and Remus Lupin to finally admit that they both fancy the pants off each other by Valentine's Day.

His partner in crime? Lily Evans, Remus' flatmate, who he also happens to be slightly in love with

- DOUBLE the amount of pining idiots in love :")

about time by @jilyss

'sure, yeah, I can accompany you to that black tie event for your work tonight. wait. why are we on a red carpet?'

- this is my emotional comfort fic, your honor

whiskey business by @elanev91

Sirius Black has a (bad?) habit of picking up hobbies that take over his and James' flat -- this most recent one? Homemade vodka that James now has to try and peddle to everyone in the building.

- hysterical! must read!

Fashion Disaster by @maraudersftw

James Potter is roped into an awful dare by his best-mate, which involves him wearing atrocious pieces of clothing for all days until Christmas as dictated by Sirius. If this wasn't terrible enough, he now has to contend with his maddening crush on the beautiful saleswoman at the clothing store.

- classic hijinks that I live for

it wasn't a pity invite by @elanev91

Part of the December "Winter Tropes" Jily challenge. Prompt: my family invites you to join our holiday meal as an obvious setup and omG i’m so sorry

- awkward Christmas date that owns my heart

spice and honey by @clare-with-no-i

tagging along with her food reporter sister to profile James Potter, London's hottest young chef, is not how Lily Evans pictured her Monday going - especially if he's anything like Petunia’s described.

needless to say, she's in for a whirlwind at Chez Maraudeur.

- I'm one re-read away from printing this out and putting it on my bookshelf.

Waffle Wars by @elanev91

There's only one waffle maker in the dining hall and it literally always breaks. So, naturally, the only reasonable course of action is to meticulously map out when it's working and, ultimately, do a heist.

- the witty narration in this fic can not be matched

You Can Hear It In The Silence by @alrightginger

Lily is non-verbal and deaf in a world where the things your soulmate says about you end up written on your skin. She has known about her soulmate since she was seven, but knows they don't have a clue she exists and possibly never will.

- exquisite, cue me sobbing forever

out the window by @displayheartcode

A new family moves to Ottery St Catchpole.

- everything I could ever want in a fic, forever in my mind rent free

The Christmas Guest by @thegodmachine

An Evans Family Christmas: Petunia is bringing her fiancé and Lily is bringing her…Friend…

- petunia pov that gives me WINGS

Football, Calculus, and Cappuccinos by @moonawrites

At eighteen years old, James Potter has a lot going on. He's a rising star navigating the politics of professional football, the pitfalls of sudden fame, the fallout from choosing his dream over his father's company... and a serious crush on the red headed new barista at his favourite coffee shop.

- I'm still working my way through this fic, but trust me when I say its a GEM

if u like pina coladas by @zephyrcove

Lily is desperate for a date to Petunia's wedding, James has been pining, and their friends meddle ;)

- explain to me how characters can be so perfect via texting fics?

Shelf Awareness by @ghostofbambifanfiction

It's too far out of her way and she's wasting so much money, but Lily can't help but return to the bookstore every weekend, where her passion for good literature has, perhaps, been unexpectedly reignited by the messy-haired, pun-making, rather handsome bloke who works there.

- you absolutely must know that I binge read this and then immediately REREAD it

How to win a witch in 10 days by @adenei

“She’s going to find some unsuspecting wizard, get him to fall for her, and then do all the things that turn men away to get him to break things off! Won’t it be the best way to see what witches do that drives men crazy?” But what happens when the man in question is a blast from Lily Evans's past? A Jily Magical AU based on the romantic comedy "How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days."

- fic based off of a rom com? YES PLZ :’)

The Fight Before Christmas by @ghostofbambifanfiction

The heartwarming Christmas tale of Lily Evans and James Potter - two plucky kids who hated one other, until the day they really, really didn't.

- complete sucker for this one

All This Time by @thejilyship

James and Lily grew up next door to one another. Their bedroom windows giving them glimpses into the others life, and also offering prime opportunities to argue with each other over every little thing. They never figured out how to be friends when they were kids, but now that they've graduated from college and are home for the summer, they have a second chance to get things right.

- one of my favvvv tropes

Let Me Love You by @thejilyship

With only a month until she's set to take the throne of Gryffindor, Lily is informed that she'll have to get married or choose to give up her throne. She never thought she'd have to even entertain the idea of an arranged marriage. Enter, James Potter.

- cries in princess diares AU

The Fabulous Baker Brothers by @frustratedpoetwrites

Lily walks a different route home from work and stumbles upon a cute little Bakery with an even cuter baker in the window.

- yes yes yes to embarrassed pining.

Marigold Mornings by @mppmaraudergirl

This is a fun game she thinks, as she removes her hand from his side and reaches up to run it down his chest.  He catches her hand in his own, takes a step forward so that her nose nearly brushes against his shirt. She can feel the heat radiating off of him—or maybe it’s from her. He licks his lips and her eyes are drawn to the motion.  She knows it is a bad idea, absolutely knows it.

- incredible storytelling featuring dynamic characters :') a favvv

Welcome to Pettyville by@women-inthe-sequel @alrightginger

When Lily Evans accidentally sends a text to the wrong number, she isn’t expecting to find the right person behind it. She can’t stop talking to Prongs. The only thing is, Prongs can’t stop talking about the girl in his class. What could go wrong, other than the number?

- LOVE SQUARE ANYONE

The Kiss a Stranger Project by @alrightginger

“What’s your name, then?” she asks, realizing they haven’t even properly introduced themselves yet. She nervously crosses her arms.

You shouldn’t kiss a guy without knowing his name first.

Right?

- THIS ONE WILL LIVE IN MY MIND FOREVER

[madfantasy]

Dear blogging

Gosh, feels like ages yet on earth, it been maybe a week or so? Disconnecting as usual

Hope your doing divine and cosily fine, I am well n5, I finally had the food, rest and sleep I sorly needed, I got fruits, the treasured rare treat I always craved, persimmon are in season, the naturnes sweetest jelly bean candy, got a yamani pomegranate,  and it was the sweetest thing I ever ate it made my eyes water a bit out of the intense gratitude for this heavily flavor. Or cuz of the stings of hurt in my back when I expressed joy, heh.

(Bruised fruits are always the sweetest and I like to take that as a metaphor)

Well, I think I have over did myself on the 24/7 non stop drawing routine, caused my back/shoulders to simply be SCREAMING of pain. I mean I wrapped my arm tight to my shoulder at the end in a way it would stop aching me till I finished commissions. And now I'm feeling well enough to be able to hold my phone, heh. I never gotten such extreme hurt while drawing before but somehow this one hit different. I kept wondering if its my chair mysteriously searing the pain, or was it my binder or my crossed legged wonky sitting pose? Drawing on the ipad certainly made me kneel down alot, so I thought maybe an ipad stand is in order, like this one! I don't know if it will cut it for me tho

https://europe.sketchboardpro.com/products/sketchboard-pro-for-ipad

But it's whatever, I never stopped drawing, ya know.

It started to get chilly here, the desert chilly ofc. When it's too hot to wear anything thick but nose, fingertips and toes are always frozen. In my case, at least, heh. I really hate the cold. Maybe not the weather itself but the gloom and drowsiness it inflicts on me. It was like boom one day I caught a weff of the cool air breeze and I couldn't find the drive to leave bed. It made me remember the dark night-like skies I seen at the school yard, having always arrived there the first, watching my breath rise before me, wishing that I have not wore 2 pajamas pants underneath my school robe, cuz it wasn't enough and only made me look ridiculous even more as I stuffed my hands in my paper thin pockets. The worst of it is when I was at the North, where it can actually snow in the desert, I was completely speechless with the constant teeth chattering still while wearing endless layers of pj's I put on to a point I can't move much and probably the most embarrassing thing that one students thought that I am an elder from walking behind me. I didn't have anything winter suited, I mean, they've always bearly managed to get me the school robe nd bag, and thats it.

And if you're curious about what winter stuff arab wear it's mostly just a Farwa (means like a fur... coat) on casual clothing, , like this

Found this fitting vid of snow in here! (https://vm.tiktok.com/ZSeMRHdfX/)

I remember wearing shoes that had a slight of heel knock to it for school cuz I didn't have shoes, and ofc I'm always taught to lie to ppl about our actual situation, so one of the teachers been horribly on my case everytime I was spotted, totally ignoring the loud mouthed students whose from head to toe actual walling dress codes, so I had to hide in the most coldest corners in the school at the mid term tests. I recall the steam of boiled corn and the cart of hot milk tea and other lunch-like goodies they had aligned near the school building entrance, from which students can buy from while they revised before and after test periods, and how I watched them enviously, book at my lap and mind too distracted to give a damn about the info before me trying convince my tummy that it will only be feasting on the smell alone or stop it from being too nauseated from it. I never wanted to unlive more at that time tbh. Needless to say I didn't thrive at anything in the years I spent there, cuz we were living in the mids of family X that we have spent decades running away from aand omg I just kept sidestepping I'm sorry

 

But it's okay, I'm finally starting to slowly get stuff for myself, and bits to my sibs, since I started commissions.. and look at this

its not much but the amount of how much I love this is unreal, this micky mouse hoodie, fulfilling my childhood's wishes to have him, so soft and makes me the good kind of drowsy ..

Moods r good tho, hasn't been not too much disturbed beside my guardian's ususal "tease" as they call it, but most of the time they are drowsy with us, too. The other day they have gone and made fun of my hair, that I was finally feeling in the depth of my core that I started to like and learn how to take care of, and threatening to cut it all off if I don't "take care" of it. I challenged them to do, making them angrier. Honestly I wish I can sheer it to something like this, tho I'd love to maintain it but it takes way too much efforts and hair cosmetics

And my wet wish is to have a star shaving on the sides and red layers of hair underneath Black toping idk how to say

Oki I troubled you enough thank you for your tolerance, now I'll be indulging myself in sleep, Harry potter games in bed and watching my sibs play checkers, wishing for the smell of roasted chestnuts hehe

Bless your days my dears, missed the lot of you, tightest hugs <\3

6.10.2021, 1 am, warm under a blanket

[shoichee]

teiko manager anon back ~ my juicy part 2 will disappoint bc guess what: we're skipping two years into the future. akashi never found out what happened, and by third year the gom were the epitome of cruelty. so reader picks a fight with them after meiko game, only to collapse out of stress after. they graduate, she follows kuroko to seirin and they train to defeat gom. but why is she so insecure and easily sad when gom is mentioned? they get their answer when they catch her overworking

oh teiko anon, so so bold.... really out here stirring the pot of chaos with this part 2 huh KEK alright folks BUCKLE IN YOUR SEATBELTS IT”S TIME FOR PART 2 and part 1 is right here ! part 3 will be here ! update: part 4 is here !

Akashi x Reader

Part 2

[Teiko!manager Headcanons]

remember how I said in part 1 how Akashi would find out sooner or later? this would normally be the case, but in this exception…

you came back to school pretty quickly and restored, only to be in shock when Akashi himself confronts you about where you’ve been… like hello? YOUR CRUSH?? is? talking? to you? about your wellbeing?

here’s the thing, Akashi can easily detect lies through body language because he has an extraordinary sense of kinetic vision and critical thinking, but he’s still a human, not to mention… a middle schooler, and he’s not a true mind reader as some teammates would wholeheartedly believe

still, after some easy sleuthing he easily drew out confessions from some teammates who badmouthed you, although every single one were some type of half-truths and inconsistent testimonies that didn’t really make sense in painting a big picture

instead of incorrectly assuming things, he wanted to hear what’s been going on from your own mouth (keep in mind, this is still Oreshi, the guy who’s still cordial and wants to confirm this with you out of respect)

when he asks you some questions, he doesn’t detect any physical signs of lying from you, which only makes him believe that there wasn’t anything wrong to begin with other than you being under the weather and the other teammates saying utter nonsense either out of fear in his presence or using you as a scapegoat to cover up other delinquencies that he may have yet to discover

“(l/n)-san, I take it that you’ve been resting well? I heard from Kuroko that you were absent due to the seasonal flu.”

“Ah, y-yes! I’ve actually gotten plenty of rest and proper meals, so I’m back on my feet quicker than expected.”

“I actually also wanted to ask you something, if you don’t mind?”

“What is it?”

“Has anything odd happening to you lately? Anyone who has given you trouble or has been uncooperative with you as head manager as of late?”

at the question, you only frown in genuine confusion before you answer no; you genuinely believed that these teammates weren’t in the wrong for “speaking their mind” and if anything, you felt like you were the problem in not being capable enough in managing your own job and your health in the process (despite being knowledgeable in health yourself)

because Akashi saw that you weren’t lying, he dropped it completely out of respect and asked you that if there was anything troubling you that you could reach out to him

oh how he was so, so close to finding out the truth

this wouldn’t be brought up ever again because you and Akashi only continued to grow busier and busier with your own duties; eventually, your fears came true when the Generation of Miracles had in fact “left” you behind when their talents blossomed too fast and left unchecked

honestly, you developed a horrible habit of overworking despite Kuroko’s and Kise’s constant checks on you

what do you know? of course the coaches and faculty members would ignore your opposition against putting the GoMs in every game; after all some of them had been quite dismissive of you already

it’s kind of ironic because if Bokukashi was the one interrogating you back then, he would’ve either easily (correctly) assume based off of the teammates’ testimonies alone, or he’d be a lot more insistent in discerning the truth of the situation and nipping it right in the bud to stop the “nonsense”

but at the same time, Bokukashi has a lot more pressing priorities than a few poor-attitude teammates when he has the entire reputation of Tekio’s legacy on his shoulders; anything pertaining to you never crossed his mind ever since his domineering side emerged

you were really excited for Kuroko since he was gushing about playing against his old friend, since his friend couldn’t make it to finals the first time // needless to say, you were also Kuroko’s mental support when he felt really down at that time

after Kuroko sustained an injury in the game before Meiko, you immediately accompanied him to the infirmary

there, Kuroko requests you to go watch the game and you only reluctantly agree because you wanted to see the game just to relay back to Kuroko just in case if he couldn’t make it, and you were still a manager with a job to fulfill; you’d figure leaving Momoi to watch over was sufficient enough

when you walk out the door though… you bump into Akashi, which is the first time in a while where you two were face-to-face like this; your heart sank when you realize that you had to accept the fact that he’s changed and allowed the distance to grow between you two

but a small part of denial makes you quickly turn and flee out the hallway, but you really begin to evaluate your crush on him as you scurry away; Akashi just stares at you for a moment before he enters into the infirmary where Kuroko is

you’ve distanced yourself from other people (GoMs in particular) in basketball out of denial of the fact you were really left behind (plus, you already dread attending to their games because it’s always a cruel reminder that you’re not working hard enough to achieve results of the same level), which is why reality slapped you in the face after the aftermath of the Meiko game… when you witnessed the full extent of their cruelty on the court

you were really hurt—in fact, you looked more distraught than the Meiko teammates themselves

especially, since the fact that Kise himself, who you thought of him as someone you can trust in, partook in this as well (this is actually your first time in seeing his cruel side in action, since he’s always been very sweet and helpful to you because he respects you)

you first confronted Kise when he was alone for a bit, sounding absolutely heartbroken and on the verge of tears; you shocked him out of his cold side and he immediately becomes a mother hen and asking if you needed water or a seat to calm down before you overexert yourself

after telling him your feelings about the game and your growing distance in the friendship, he sincerely apologizes for making you feel in such an awful way and tells you to let him know next time before a game, so that he wouldn’t suggest this type of entertainment for the game again.

you were in complete disbelief… the fact that your best friend suggested this himself? You dumbly asked for his reason, and he only says that you wouldn’t understand it because no one ever gives the GoM a proper challenge

even though he didn’t intend anything bad when he said this, it just made you feel worse, but you still accepted the apology to get it over with

the other GoMs come and you immediately become angry again and tension just skyrockets; Midorima simply looks away and says nothing, and Murasakibara and Aomine do most of the talking back/arguing… and Akashi only impassively stares at you

later, when Kuroko himself confronts them while everyone was walking in the hallway, you completely lagged behind on the group, tearfully staring at the backs of the GoMs and how you felt really alienated and unmotivated to continue being a manager for a team you don’t even recognize anymore

you grew dizzy again, and you knew your body was dealing with too much at once but you willed your body to at least last the trip

at least you gave a warning when you assumed that you were away from the GoMs at Teiko before you went unconscious; Kise happens to catch you before he brings you to the school infirmary

he does stay with you the entire time, knowing the reason for your collapse was all the extreme emotional and mental toll accumulated in such a short time; he feels absolutely guilty, and when you were about to stir awake, he simply leaves a lighthearted note and a cutely shaped bread before he leaves, knowing that you’d be stressed again if you saw him (around this time is when Kuroko confronts Akashi to quit the team, which is why he was nowhere near you at the time of your collapse/rest)

you felt better that at least Kise still sees you as a close friend when you see what he left behind

you still feel awful, to say the least

it felt wrong of you to quit mid-season, since you felt that you were simply giving up and further perpetuating the fact that you weren’t doing the most that you could

but you didn’t feel like staying for the rest of the season, so you decided to overwork yourself again to get the rest of the paperwork and training plans out of the way for the remainder of the games; you even left detailed instructions to Momoi in how to relieve certain pressure points and muscles for instant relief in case someone hurts themselves

a little timeskip where you decided to tag along Kuroko in attending Seirin High, but you were more reluctant in joining basketball again because you didn’t want to re-experience the stress and burdens in Teiko

well, until you made friends with Riko, and her story in how she was skeptical about basketball at first too inspires you to give it a try again

Kuroko feels really happy that you’re at ease again for the first time, but he definitely notices how you grow gloomy when the Seirin teammates praise the GoMs

you slowly relapse into the habit of overworking to “compensate” for your lack of contributions to Seirin’s team, but this time, every member DROPKICKS you to stop working and relax sometimes (Riko and Hyuuga are the main culprits)

even though you never tell them the reason for your poor habits, the Seirin team members just SENSE and KNOW what to say to make you feel like you’re doing more than enough to support the team in their own unique ways (Mitobe giving really cute shoulder pats and thumbs-ups… Koganei giving you slaps on the back and high-fives… Riko bluntly telling you to relax and giving you encouraging winks… Hyuuga being a roundabout in his praises… Teppei openly praising you… and Kagami telling you that you were doing too much LOL)

Kuroko gives you the SOFTEST SMILES (everyone freaks out every time he does that, it’s hilarious)

however, wounds slowly reopen more once again every time Seirin goes against schools that the respective GoM plays for

after every win Seirin achieves against the GoM’s respective school, each GoM would eventually learn a little tidbits here and there about your tendency to overwork and collapse and possible speculations of why, but you never confirm anything with them

even though you easily forgive Kise after the Seirin vs. Kaijo match (seeing how he interacted with Kagami and Kuroko in the park), for the others… you weren’t so ready to confront…

… particularly with Akashi

[black-coffee-and-sugar]

Listen, I actually couldn't finish this episode. Like I lost brain cells, got ingestion and finally KO-ed because I could NOT grasp the plot. Not even seeing Lena again made this enjoyable for me. But here's what I got:

- I wonder how many takes Thomas took to say Nxyly's full name without biting his tongue off

- also I am so sorry Thomas that they had you sing. And yet somehow that wasn't the most cringe thing to happen in this episode

- Nia and Kara desperately assigning blame to themselves instead of just, idk, working together to fix the problem. Who cares who's fault it is??

- Alex jumping in front of kara when mxy brandishes the PZ projector is the only thing I liked

- Kelly's absence felt so odd after 2 back to back episodes of her front and centre

- Nia thinking that Kara would drag her for making a mistake makes me wonder if these characters even know each other

- kara: "I should've told you guys about Nxyly". Yes you idiot you absolutely should have! Like I get that they don't wanna bring it up but like how is ignoring what happened to her any better? Do they not do any Intel sharing?

- the fucking zookeeper is still here?!?!?

- look I wasn't expecting Lena to be talking to kara on the phone, I know better than that, but I had hoped it would at least be Nia considering that Lena and her have been bonding over their moms and it just makes sense??

- andrea's titty window sans kara or Lena to see it. What was it all for?

- I understand Lena using Andrea's resources to help her out and shit and I'm actually surprised the writer's remembered she doesn't have access to the LuthorCorp jet anymore. I honestly wouldn't have batted an eye if she did tho.

- the way we haven't had ANY scenes of dialogue between kara and lena aside from 6x01 and only ONE line from kara to Lena since then. Like are they actually going to brush everything under the goddamn rug? We heard from Alex that they've forgiven each other and it seems that way too but we haven't actually had the chance to judge that as an audience and it's (checks notes) 11 episodes already???

-Kara is back and yet Lena doesn't seem full. Kara is back and yet she hasn't been vulnerable with lena or with anyone really. Or was that all a lie?

- Nxyly is actually kinda hot in this episode. Interesting development there

- the team actually fighting a giant pussy cat and more brain cells have died. If they were hoping it would be amusing like the Legends fighting a giant Beebo, spoiler alert - it was not

- mxy and Nxyly and even the king has some keysmash names but one imp is actually named Jared? Just fucking Jared. Christ

- Lena being bullied by a bunch of Canadians is hilarious and I say this as a Canadian. Like Lena has stood her ground against Lex, Lillian, SG, an interrogation room filled with judgemental pricks, fucking Reign and yet, she looked two seconds from crying when denied her hotel room by some fucking Newfies. Get the fuck outa here.

- not a single Tim Hortons run in this entire episode. Are we sure she even went to Canada???

- at one point, I was rooting for Nxyly to win.

- so not only did they bring back that god awful wig that they actually had the audacity to make footage with it? That thing needs to be snatched and thrown into the sun like the trash monster.

- Katie looked so done in this episode and I don't even blame her. I suffered second hand embarrassment on her behalf. Those lines, her behaviour. It's like what the fuck happened to the Lena from the past 4 seasons?

- the mean bartender says "I've seen you on the news running arm in arm with a bulletproof alien" and the places my mind went is probably why I didn't pay any attention to the rest of the episode.

- so lemme see if I have this right. Lena's mom visits the cave lady in her dreams but never once thought to visit her traumatized little daughter?

- am I supposed to be upset that they killed an abuser? Because I'm not

- so much porn shots of the town car driving up and down some sketch and lonely road

- did Google maps really lead Lena to some random cave?? Bruh

- Lena's scenes felt so disconnected for a minute I thought I was watching a completely different show.

- aluminum foil on the props lord did they just say fuck it and made a Dollarama run for the cheapest 200ft roll they could buy?

- Kara being a mentor to Nia for the first time since that Nia centric episode last season. God I hate it here.

- they do remember J'onn is a shape shifter right? Why do we need an image inducer? I get the little Lena is still with the team crumb but it's stupid.

- still no word on M'gann huh

- yo since the Luthors are technically perceived on Earth-Prime as "good", what trail of bodies is this bar lady talking about? This isn't public knowledge and Lena's mom only killed 1 dude who frankly deserved it.

- sigh. We're really doing this witch Lena thing then.

- kara stop trying to reach the good in people! Just stop. When has this bullshit EVER WORKED? Some people are just too far gone. Accept it.

- stronger together has truly lost meaning on this show

- Alex and Kara being so willing to hold much less use the PZ projector is utter bullshit. Also they just have that thing lying around for any grabby hands to take?

- what the actual fuck is Kara's arc this season? Or Alex? Or poor J'onn. The man has been seriously neglected.

- kara is supposed to be the most powerful being on the planet and yet this show continues to nerf her abilities. God I missed the days of S1 when Kara looked like she could fuck shit up.

- also when is kara going to be the focus of her own show again? Are we ever going to properly address Kara's issues? We got two episodes of James processing his trauma and only 5 mins of flashbacks in 6x08 for Kara and a few fleeting moments sprinkled across the last 5 seasons. Ridiculous. Like it won't diminish her as a character to seek professional help, it won't make her any less of a hero. Think of how impactful that would be and the message that could send about the importance of mental health.

- glad to see a promo for this important episode next week (I honestly can't wait - Kelly in a head wrap is so personal to me y'all) but please I'm begging you, do not make the issue of race come at the expense of kara's intelligence and awareness. She's a journalist, she's seen xenophobia and written about it, she's been friends with James for years. Kara knows about racism. Please show that.

Needless to say I did not enjoy this episode at all. I was happy to see Lena again but all her scenes were just hard to watch. I feel like so much of their very limited time is being wasted and there's still so many things they haven't touched upon yet. When exactly are we gonna get to it? Better question, will we ever get to it? Probably not.

Like I wanted to see the super friends communicating, leaning on each other, character growth, being truly stronger together but no. They're giving us literally anything but that and it's frustrating.

[imnotgrimimjustagrumpyreaper]

Everything you never thought to ask and never wanted to know about my Josépan playlist/history with and opinions of the ship.

Intro:

The journey of this playlist has been a long one, starting on Amazon Music and my old, janky and now defunct Ipad.

STRAP IN, CHILDREN AS I TAKE YOU BACK TO A MAGICAL TIME WHEN NEITHER LEGENDS OF THE THREE CABALLEROS; NOR THEIR CAMEO IN DUCKTALES HAD BEEN ANNOUNCED YET, MY BLOG ON TUMBLR DIDN’T EXIST (THOUGH I WAS LURKING) AND PANCHITO WAS STILL THE LEAST POPULAR CABALLERO, otherwise known as around late 2017.

A word on the origins of the playlist:

The playlist was not initially Ducktales focused because the two didn’t exist in Ducktales yet. I was rather unenthusiastic back in the day about this ship (oh how the times change) but I had stumbled across a song that didn’t fit them and Donald but fit just them very well and wanted to make an animatic of it. So, I cobbled together some songs I thought fit the vibe and made a playlist.

The history behind the story that inspired it:

I’ll spare you from starting at the very beginning. But, when “The Town Where Everyone was Nice” premiered I was already thoroughly and utterly obsessed with the cabs; I remember how beyond ecstatic I was for the episode. My hype for the Ducktales versions of José and Panchito continued far beyond what seems to have been normal for the average cabs fan. I found myself drawn to the ideas put forth by those versions of them. I don’t really remember what the tipping point was for me to break down and make my own college AU but eventually I did. It was affectionately dubbed “The TV Show That Will Never Happen AU.” José and Panchito were enemies to lovers or at least to friends. And it was around that time I began to go CRAZY with the headcanons as I got more active in the fandom. While my ideas for the Ducktales versions of them grew and grew, so too did the time between them appearing in “The Town Where Everyone was Nice” and their alleged next appearance in the show. When fans noticed the distinct lack of José and Panchito in the season two finale of Ducktales, Francisco Angones, @//suspenderofdisbelief on Tumblr answered these two separate asks that I might have engraved on tombstone one day:

I was GONE for the ship after that. I developed another AU for them based around their time in Baia trying to get people to fund their attempts to become famous musicians. Also, slowly falling in love... It was affectionately titled “The Fan-Comic that Will Never Happen” but not yet connected to my college AU. I don’t have much of a timeline for it after this point, but with that AU I really hit my stride for interpretations of the two characters and their dynamic. The version of them I hold dear in my heart and headcanons came to be. Then “Louie’s Eleven” came out and absolutely destroyed a lot of my headcanons (just kidding, just kidding). Since the new canon material didn’t really jive with a lot of the wholesomeness I had built up I was left with a lot of something else: angst. I LOVE angst, but the two’s bitterness and arguing...It was hard to accept at the time. Me and @cartoon-lizard on Tumblr, my IRL best friend, wound up writing a Josépan fic fueled on a bit of that angst and by her grace, a lot of my headcanons. I titled it “My Reverie is Being Haunted by That Ass.” In it Panchito makes an ass (rimshot noises) of himself by running off with a producer he met by chance during a visit in Duckburg to try to become famous. And doing so without so much as a second thought to the person he’s been living with/sort of dating for over a year. It took me a while but eventually I figured it out. These weren’t three separate AUs, these were three separate pieces of the same AU. And so my masterpiece never meant to be made came to be: “The Trilogy: College/Baia/Reverie.”

“The Trilogy” Itself:

The story will never be written for a variety of reasons, personal and practical. But if it ever were to be written it would be three separate fics, aka: College, Baia and Reverie.

College encapsulates their college years (duh).

To set the stage:

Panchito: A friendly, arrogant and easily excitable musician with big dreams, good grades and a whole lot of anxiety and insecurity. He has complicated feelings towards his identity as both trans and pan and how that might affect his dreams of becoming famous, but is overall bright eyed and innocent enough.

José: A lazy (depressed), charming, pessimistic, tbh kind of a douche and deep in the closet gay man. He tends to push forward a very “Manly man” persona to make up for his own deep seated internalized homophobia brought on by a shitty upbringing. He just got away from said shitty upbringing and doesn’t really have any hopes for his future...Maybe to travel a bit?

José and Panchito start as enemies, both fearing losing their one real friend, Donald, to the other. Despite this the three start a band and the two’s rivalry becomes far more friendly. They get particularly close during the trip down to Acapulco for spring break where the general feeling of being disconnected from life and reality leads to several rather romantic moments between the two...They almost become a thing several times but never quite do. However, they are very good friends by the end of college. The three stay in contact for a while after college but eventually lose touch…

Baia timeskips forward 13 years later (I know it's only 10 canonically, I always say 13 for reasons) to a conversation between Panchito and José on the Sunchaser at the end of “The Town Where Everyone Was Nice.”

Panchito: Life hasn’t been kind to Panchito...His need to be famous, to be something in order to be someone has led him to push a lot of people out of his life so he can better focus on “Work.” Or drive them out by constantly asking for their support, financial or otherwise. He has no friends and even his relationships with his loving and supportive family are strained. Currently, he’s working freelance as a performer at childrens’ birthday parties (in his eyes: a clown) and goes home to a sad, empty apartment every night to stare at a notebook full of half written songs and muster enough energy to eat cereal for dinner for the third time in a row. Needless to say, his optimism is wearing thin.

José: A lot of hard work on his part, some good therapy and mmm; drugs have put him in a pretty good place. He’s more or less got his life together now, is way less of a douche and is more of a realist than a pessimist. He’s also pretty much completely comfortable in his identity as a gay man. He’s been trying to explore romantic relationships, but unfortunately (likely due to the loveless marriage between his parents making him strive so hard to believe that love is real that he puts the unrealistic goal of true love above all else) feels incomplete without one and double unfortunately has a tendency to be drawn to toxicity and abusive situations. So other than a string of (short lived) bad relationships, he’s actually doing great!

Panchito has already asked Donald to drop everything and stay with him down in Baia to try to get funding for the band. Donald said no. José has a steady job, a decent apartment and a supportive friend group back home. He's also long since lost interest and hope in their college dreams of being famous...José says yes. The two have a bunch of wild and wacky shenanigans trying to get funding and both dance around their growing feelings for each other until it explodes and overwhelms them. They rush into a romantic relationship head first with no real ground for it to be built on and unrealistic expectations of what the other can give them. Despite all this, things seem quite happy...for a while…

If you've made it this far, <3, CONT. in pt 2.

[rosaliepostsstuff]

Little steps | pt 1 - Admiration - George Weasley

Pairing: George Weasley x Reader (though very subtle in this one)

Summary: You’re friends with the golden trio (you might even say golden four in this one) and you join them when they go to the Quidditch Cup final.

Word count: 1,5k

A/N: ok, so, it’s my first ever fic, so I’m not sure how it came out, but I couldn’t help myself to not post it and find out what people may think. It’s pretty slow I think, but just because I didn’t feel like diving head first to the good bits I have in mind, I needed the sort of intro, and if it’s generally any good, hopefully there’ll be more?? looking forward to feedback, the good and the bad. And english is not my first language so sorry if anything sounds funny

1994 Saturday, August 24th

You arrived at the Burrow in the afternoon, along with Hermione. It was the day before the Quidditch Cup final, Ireland vs. Bulgaria. Although your brothers were also going, you decided to accept Ron’s invitation as it would be more exciting and give you a chance to do something new with three of your best friends. You had to admit, you didn’t expect Hermione to come, as she wasn’t the biggest Quidditch fan, but the idea of such a huge event, gathering wizards from all over the world must’ve been too tempting.

You had to admit that evening was filled with excitement, you and your friends tried to casually hang out like you have many times before, but your thoughts always seemed to look forward to waking up Monday morning and heading out for the event.

The next day at five o’clock the boys – Ron, Fred and George went to pick up Harry from the Dursleys’ place. You wondered to yourself whether all of them going was really necessary, or how bad could it go. But there was also a part of you that was just curious what would come out of it. And so, you were currently sat at the table, talking to Bill and Charlie. Pretending you’re not waiting for the party to come back.

You didn’t have to wait long. First, it was Fred, along with his smug expression. You couldn’t help but look at him curiously. He caught your eye and understood, but didn’t say anything. He just smirked, gave you the smallest nod and looked away, as if telling you to wait. So you did. A minute later came George, carrying a trunk which you recognised to be Harry’s. The moment he appeared, he was grinning, stumbled out of the fireplace with the trunk. He left it on the floor and high-fived Fred, now both twins already laughing. Then arrived Ron, his reaction similar. Your curiosity almost overflowing at this point. Soon, Harry fell out of the fireplace, Fred reaching out a hand to help him up. -Did he eat it? – he asked Harry. Who could he be asking about? And what did he eat? -Yeah. – Harry answered, getting up. -What was it? -Ton-Tongue Toffee. George and I invented them, we’ve been looking for someone to test them on all summer…

The boys started laughing, and you couldn’t help but chuckle too. -What exactly happened?! – you asked, looking between them, your eyes stopping on George for no reason at all. He grinned at you, then looked at Fred and they chuckled. You might’ve gotten an explanation if it wasn’t for Mr. Weasley’s arrival.

-That wasn’t funny, Fred! – he shouted. He looked angry, and you’ve never seen Arthur Weasley angry before, even with twins’ antics. It led you to wondering how often it happened. - What on earth did you give that Muggle boy? -I didn’t give him anything -  said Fred, with another evil grin. – I just dropped it… It was his fault he went and ate it, I never told him to. -How big did his tongue get? - George asked eagerly. -It was four feet long before his parents would let me shrink it! - Harry and the Weasleys roared with laughter again. You were starting to put the pieces together. -It isn’t funny! -  Mr. Weasley shouted. -That sort of behaviour seriously undermines wizard–Muggle relations! I spend half my life campaigning against the mistreatment of Muggles, and my own sons- -We didn’t give it to him because he’s a Muggle! - said Fred indignantly. -No, we gave it to him because he’s a great bullying git, - said George. -Isn’t he, Harry? – You were almost certain they were talking about Dudley, Harry’s cousin.

-Yeah, he is, Mr. Weasley, - said Harry earnestly. Pranking people wasn’t new to Fred and George, and you had to admit, you didn’t always find it funny. But the fact that Harry never asked for any type of revenge on the git, yet the twins simply listened to his - sometimes subtle, sometimes not so much – complaints, gave you a new portion of admiration for the lads. Or maybe it just reminded you how much you already did admire them, even if you never said it out loud. -That’s not the point! -raged Mr. Weasley. - You wait until I tell your mother- -Tell me what? - said a voice behind them. Uh oh. Mr. Weasley didn’t know what to do, after all he didn’t really want to tell Molly. She inquired further. Hermione came in to the room behind her, quickly sensing what was about to go down. And so – you, the girls, Harry and Ron bolted upstairs with an excuse to settle Harry in.

You walked downstairs to help with dinner after the fight seemed to have stopped. Molly asked the girls to set the tables outside, so you did it, but while you were still close enough to hear, you listened as she complained about Fred and George, maybe more to herself than to Harry. How disappointed she is, how they’re wasting their brains, and how they’re not going to achieve anything or where things had gone wrong. You listened, and couldn’t help but feel a tiny pang in your heart – and the voice in your head that started to defend them. But after all, it wasn’t your problem.

The next morning, you were woken up by Mrs. Weasley while it was still dark. You definitely did not get enough sleep, but thanks to the adrenaline, you didn’t notice, though you’d certainly notice it later in the day. Your friends were all groggy, and after having breakfast you left – but not without Molly confiscating some more of twins’ Ton-Tongue Toffees they were surely hoping to get away with and sell.

The walk wasn’t too long. You were supposed to take a portkey on one of the hills near Ottery St. Catchpole. You weren’t the only ones, though. Amos Diggory appeared with his son, Cedric. -Hi -said Cedric looking around the teens, and all except for Fred and George (who were holding grudges after being defeated by Hufflepuff quidditch team the previous season) replied. -Hey, Y/N/N – he said, smiling kindly at you. You didn’t miss the look Ginny and Hermione exchanged. You knew Cedric. He was tall, handsome and smart – the golden boy, and the two of you shared a friend circle.

When you arrived at the campsite, you were all positively overwhelmed. You took in your surroundings, met some Hogwarts friends and settled into your tent. Inside, waiting for the match, you were hanging out in smaller groups. You got up from the chair you were sitting in to grab some water for yourself. Walking into the small tent kitchen, your thoughts still in the conversation you had with Harry, you bumped into someone’s chest. You looked up to see the face of your victim -Oh, sorry George! my bad - you said quickly and were about to pass him, when another long-haired ginger appeared behind his shoulder. -You so sure about that, love? – said Fred, smirking. -What, that I’m sorry? I mean it’s not like I knocked him off his feet but… - you said, well knowing where he was going with it. You knew damn well which was which. The three of you rarely spoke directly, often hanging out with the rest of your shared friends. But you always saw them. In the very beginning, when you started being friends with Ron and met his older brothers the young girl in you was excited for attention from boys who were two whole years older than you – which seemed basically adult at the time. You liked them both and couldn’t decide which one more. Through the years, needless to say, you calmed down a bit. You also got to know their respective personalities and although your childish crush never got serious, you were still happy to receive any kind of attention – from one of them this time, George. They gave each other the look and both stepped to the side to let you pass, which you did. -Didn’t think you’d be so sure about telling us apart, is all – said George. A slight disappointment. You decided to turn the funny on. You feigned hurt, put your hand up to your heart and looked back at them -That’s sad! I know you don’t talk to me as much but I still know you – you turned more serious. With a small smile, you said -And I like to think we’re friends. It clearly took them a bit by surprise. -Yeah.. Yeah, we are, of course. -Said Fred, nodding. George nodded too, with a kind smile on his face. With that, they left.

It wasn’t long before the match began. The events that followed. Now, you were just looking forward to being back at Hogwarts and find out what kind of surprise everyone was whispering about.

Part 2

[marriedmormon]

Tami

Posted April 2021

Sorry for not posting the last few months. COVID is still killing any opportunities to have fun. Still stuck at home. Still not out playing the field. I have had a few chats on FB that in time may lead to something but as of right now still just using my right hand.  Here is a fun little story about Tami.  There was one week about 6 years ago that really stands out. My wife and kids were out of town for the week. I had a football away trip planned, and I took the opportunity to be a little man slut.  I slept with 5 different women in 7 nights. Kasey, Alyssa, Monica, Mindy, and Tami. I have introduced you to all these women except for Tami (see other post). If it wasn’t for Tami’s looks, I’m pretty sure I never would have slept with her. She was stunning to the eyes but to the ears she was quite annoying. Tami was the definition of MILF. She was knocked up at an early age (15) and by the time we met she had 4 kids, all of which were nearly adults. She also had a 20-year-old daughter who would have been an amazing fuck but never got a chance. Needless to say, this woman was in her late 30’s, had a little bit of a “mommy makeover” work done, and had been divorced about 2 years when we met. Tami was also Mormon but in no ways actively practicing. In fact, after her divorce she really went the opposite direction. The story of how we met is kind of unreal and happened a few months earlier. At the time I was working for the same company where I met Elise and Monica at. There was a third girl there that I was pursuing (a lot more than 3 actually but…), and we were at a company party. I was spending a lot of time talking with this target of mine which apparently went noticed. Tami and I were briefly introduced while in casual conversation, but she could tell my shenanigans. Tami was literally on a date with someone from my work (someone I didn’t know). Anyway, long story short she asked a few people there who I was and one girl she asked knew me and had assumptions that I was game. Later that night I got a Facebook friend request from Tami and she started immediately with the chats. She asked me if I was a swinger or if I was just trying to fuck that girl I was talking to all night. I honestly felt like it was possibly a spy or setup that maybe my wife was behind, so I carefully probed and responded. Not tipping my hat at all as to what I was about. I honestly was really hoping that she was for real and not a sting setup by someone. Tami was always taking the lead and trying to get me to do or say things that were naughty. Even though I had reservations about this woman, I really REALLY wanted to take it to the next level. This went on for weeks and (for some reason I can’t remember) she was talking about how the pool at her condo was closing down that weekend for the season and I felt comfortable enough to ask her for a pic in the swimsuit she was in. I got dozens of pics. All very sexy. Very seductive. I got brave enough to say things like “I want to see what’s underneath that suit”. My subtle, yet conservative comments were all that it took for her to escalate the conversations. Once in, I couldn’t stop, nor could she. We started sexting and skyping all the time. I even mentioned my upcoming football road trip and that the family was doing a different trip the same time. She totally took the opportunity to schedule her kids to be with their dad the same time and had a date for me to come over. When I got there, she opened her door in this tight tank top and some PJ shorts that were just asking to come off. For some reason we didn’t start right away but started talking. She wanted to know about my trip and somehow, I let it slip that I fucked Mindy just the night before. She loved the fact that I was this man slut player and told me about her latest fuck(s). Almost like a competition. She told me that she was a “well fucked woman” and wanted to prove to me that she would please me. In my mind, I had to please her better than her other conquests. I grabbed her and threw her on her kitchen counter and slid my fingers under her PJ shorts. Our little verbal foreplay had made her soaking wet and as soon as my fingers touched her pussy, I knew I had to feel it with my dick. As I started taking off her top and she jumped off the counter and started leading me upstairs. Playfully, she was moving faster than I was but I managed to grab her shorts on the stairs and I pulled them down. I climb over her naked body on the stairs, reaching around feeling her shaved pussy with one hand and groping her fake tits with my other. She couldn’t move with my weigh on her but she said “Are you going to fuck me?” I pulled down my pants and went in her from behind. She was so wet that my dick just glided in. It felt so good but I tend to not last very long going doggie so I flipped her over so I could see her full naked body. I watched my dick slide in and out of her pussy as she kept telling me to fuck her hard. Of course, the stairs got uncomfortable quickly and I needed to pause because it was my goal to make her cum first. So I suggested we move to her bed. We got to the bed and she kept telling me to fuck her hard. It was like one of those porn stars you think are told to keep saying things that people don’t normally say. I finally moved her body to the edge of the bed as I stood on the side. I was able to use my arms to pull her toward me with each thrust, fucking her as hard and deep as I could. She kept screaming “DEEPER! HARDER!” until finally she said “FUCK! I’M CUMMING!” She held her breath until her face turned nearly purple and let out the best vocal orgasm I have heard. I made it this far without cumming myself, but I was close. I moved my hands to the bottom of her thighs and pushed her legs up to her chest and just pounded as fast as I could. This little adjustment made her pussy so tight and the angle to me felt like I was going even deeper. As I was about to cum, I took her example and decided to hold my breath as I came. I didn’t turn purple, but it felt AMAZING (so much so that I do this nearly every time now). For about 3 months, Tami and I fucked several times when we could. Because she was single, she fucked a lot more than I did and she kept with the competition and would tell me about all of them. It got a little annoying and frustrating that I couldn’t get there as often as I could. She even talked about setting up a group fuck that I couldn’t break away to join. I think she finally got bored of waiting for me and stopped texting. We are still FB friends and she is in a relationship, but I still think she is fucking every man she can. The pics I have of Tami are somehow missing. I have them on an old phone or flash drive somewhere, but I don’t know where. I guess you will just have to picture a short haired blonde with fake boobs, perfect hips, and a shaved pussy.   

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My Problems with the Pokémon Journeys Anime

Pokémon Journeys as an anime has divided the Pokémon community in so many ways but in particular last week’s episode has sparked a lot of debate and personally, I had mixed feelings about the end result. So, I thought I would write down my opinions on the Pokémon anime in its current state and comparing it to some of the previous anime.

I feel the need to say this: these are my opinions I am just as entitled to my opinions as you are to yours, so you don’t have to read this if you don’t want to. Secondly, this will probably be a long post but I’m going to split it into sections so it’s hopefully not too overwhelming.

But these feelings have been building up and up and I think I’ll feel better writing them all down and getting them off my chest to some extent.

Introduction:

So, I’ve essentially been a fan of Pokémon for as long as I can remember particularly watching the anime when I was very young. The anime didn’t really begin to stick with me though until around AG and DP in particular. The first Pokémon game, I played was DP which is why I have a particular fondness for that series and that cast of characters and Pokémon.

I didn’t watch the series as intently around the time of BW because I found Iris’ character rather annoying and I understand she developed and grew as the series went on but that initial characterization of her kind of ruined the series for me. But I did dip in and out of the series mostly for Ash’s Snivy.

My friend recommended that I watch the XY series and I fell in love with the cast and the storytelling that the series provided as it reminded me of DP. Sun and Moon was a good series as well providing fans with some of the most heart-breaking and tear-jerking episodes to date. (And Rowlet).

When they announced that Journeys was Ash travelling around the world instead of staying and travelling in a specific region, I’ll admit I was sceptical. To be honest, I kind of preferred the old formula particularly as I’m a creature of habit myself but I decided to give this new series a chance as the premise did sound interesting and there was the potential for Ash to reunite with some of his old travelling companions.

With the benefit of hindsight, I realise this was one of the problems: the series kind of relies heavily on the nostalgia provided by older fans.

The Premise:

The whole premise of Journeys was Ash and his new friend, Goh travelling the world and there lies one of the series biggest problems. For a series that is meant to be about travelling around the world, a bulk of the series has been set in Kanto in particular Vermillion City where Sakuragi/Cerise Lab is situated. Now that shouldn’t be a problem as Ash and Go need a place to stay and go home to. The problem is we are nearly 60 episodes into the series, they hardly seem to leave Vermillion City or Kanto for that matter.

I went through all the episode synopses released so far to see how many episodes Ash and Go travelled to an alternative region. In this case a visit to a different region only counts if Ash and Goh (and Chloe) visit the region therefore episode 32 wouldn’t count:

Johto – 2 episodes

Hoenn – 4 episodes

Sinnoh – 2 episodes

Unova – 2 episodes

Kalos – 2 episodes

Alola – 1 episode

Galar – 11 episodes

Arguably, as this is meant to a Gen 8 anime, its not particularly shocking that they have visited Galar the most especially as Ash hopes to battle Leon someday. Nevertheless, the initial premise and selling point of the Journeys series is travelling the world and yet only 2/5 of the series so far has been set outside of Vermillion City. They promised the world (no pun intended) and are kind of falling flat…

 Goh and his goal:

Now Goh is certainly a character that has divided the community some love him and some definitely hate him. Personally, I’m in the middle, I like Goh’s personality I thought his rational and logical personality made him a great counterbalance for Ash. The problem I have with him is: his goal, his rapid character development, and his status as a protagonist.

1)   His Goal:

Goh’s goal is to catch every Pokémon in existence and considering there over 800 Pokémon that is a lofty goal to begin with. Initially, I thought it was an interesting goal as we never had a character wanting to catch every Pokémon as there are some trainers in the anime universe who only specialise in a specific type, some who catch only cute Pokémon, some who only catch evolutionary lines etc. Therefore, I thought this was an interesting goal and wondered how they would execute its portrayal and there lies the problem…

Goh was named after the game Pokémon Go and is essentially being used as a walking advertisement for Pokémon Go and the Let’s Go series as his gimmick is throwing a Poke Ball at a random Pokémon which can get pretty old very fast. I honestly didn’t understand the need to create a character to promote these games as it has been 4 years since the release of Pokémon Go. Arguably, they could be trying to re-ignite the hype around Pokémon Go as after the initial excitement a lot of people stopped playing or uninstalled it as it was taking up a lot of space on their phone.

One of the things, I particularly love about the anime series is not only the human cast gaining character development but their Pokémon as well. Around the AG series, the writers really begun improving on giving each Pokémon their own unique personality traits as well as traits of their species. It gave the Pokémon more depth and made them memorable for example there’s Dawn’s prideful Piplup, Brock’s weird and wonderful Sudowoodoo who would salute every time he came out of his Poke Ball, Clemont’s gluttonous Chespin and Serena’s shy Eevee to later a confident Sylveon. The list could go on and on but I think you get the point. Therefore, this gives me my second issue with Goh’s goal.

Goh’s goal is to catch every single Pokémon currently in existence, with so many Pokémon, there is difficulty feeling any attachment to them. Cinderace and Sobble (and now Grookey) are the Pokémon Goh is most seen with, needless to say, Cinderace underwent a lot of development and was interested in battling which to be honest I found a little strange as Goh’s goal doesn’t particularly align with Cinderace’s interests. Nevertheless, it is clear that Cinderace is Goh’s ace and utilises him when he does need to battle. Sobble didn’t receive any development until 26 episodes after his capture. However, aside from Cinderace and Sobble we don’t feel any particular attachment to his other Pokémon, one strength is that anime does give each of his Pokémon some spotlight like Goh using his Goldeen to teach Jinny’s Feebas how to swim elegantly but aside from that.

My final issue with Goh’s goal is development, from a story-telling point of view his goal isn’t that engaging like with some of the other goals we’ve had in the series. Take Dawn for example her goal is to be Top Coordinator in order to do that she needs to win 5 Ribbons, participate in the Grand Festival and win the Ribbon Cup. On paper it sound simple but it’s not, we have Dawn’s arc where she lost twice in the Performance Stage fell into depression, lost confidence in her abilities and was uncertain as to whether or not she was a good coordinator. It wasn’t until she befriended May and competed against her that Dawn found a renewed sense of confidence in her abilities, even after that Dawn still lost a few contests before being able to compete in the Grand Festival where even then there were a few rough moments like her battle with Ursula.

My point is even though Dawn (and May’s) goal looks simple on paper they had a lot of struggle to get there. Whereas, with Goh’s goal and the current execution of it, I don’t get that same sense of story-telling especially when he’s already caught a Legendary Pokémon, there just isn’t that same level of struggle. The most I could see Goh struggling at this moment is not catching a Pokémon the first time round.

2) His rapid development

One of the biggest issues I have with Journeys is pacing and development, and this issue isn’t just exclusive to Goh. In the beginning, Goh is a rookie trainer after catching Scorbunny and as we saw in the Flute Cup his lack of battling experience caused him to be eliminated very quickly and yet 29 episodes later, he’s defeating a Flygon with a Fire-type and using a technique Ash had once used himself in his battle against Grant. I understand Ash and Goh are close friends and understandably their traits are going to rub off on one another for example Goh’s logic and caution has rubbed off on Ash to the extent Ash had his Dragonite use Dragon Dance in his battle with Korrina. Before this, we’d never seen Ash use these types of moves in his Pokémon battles. I have no issues with Goh developing as a character, everyone loves good character development, my issue is with how rapid it is.

I’ll use Dawn’s arc as an example again, I loved it because it was well-paced, in the first season of DP Dawn was overconfident in her abilities which led to some losses particularly towards the end of the first series and Dawn didn’t fully recover from this until nearly midway through the second series of DP. Arguably, Ash’s influence has caused Goh to develop an interest in battles but I feel like we haven’t seen him go through enough battles to justify the level he is at.

3) His status as a Protagonist

To be honest, I didn’t realise Goh has a protagonist status until someone pointed it out to me, I just saw him as another one of Ash’s travelling companions. This is one of the biggest issues Goh haters have with him and that’s feeling as though Goh is taking the spotlight away from Ash and there are a lot of episodes focusing on Goh. Arguably, Ash has taken on the role of mentor like Brock had done once for him. However, my issue with Goh’s protagonist status is that I don't feel like Goh's goal justifies him having it, even in episodes focusing on Ash and his participation in the World Coronation Series, Goh still manages to catch a Pokémon which as I mentioned before it got old pretty fast. I can understand some people would see this as a good thing they are both closer towards their goals but if an episode advertises its going to focus on one character, I want it to focus on that character.

In some of the previous series when May, Dawn and Serena were participating in Contests or Showcases, Ash would generally put his training the back burner and support his friends. Likewise, his travelling companions would support him during his gym battles. In some cases, Ash would even get ideas for his own battles from watching them compete like the Counter Shield from Ash watching Dawn and Ambipom.

Sometimes, I feel like Goh is there for the sake of being there like in Episode 56, I honestly felt like him and Scyther/Scizor didn’t need to be there. The episode did focus on Ash and Farfetch’d relationship improving but I felt like the only reason Goh was there was to have his Scyther evolve their presence at the training camp didn’t really contribute anything to the story.

Ash and his Pokémon:

Whenever Ash starts a new journey, he always starts with a clean slate leaving his most recent Pokemon with Professor Oak or Kukui. One of the things that excites fans the most is guessing which new Pokemon from the new generation Ash would catch. Arguably, since Sun and Moon, certain traditions have been turned on their head. Some of these traditions included:

Ash catching the regional bird e.g., Starly, Pidove, Fletchling etc.

Catching at least one of the region’s starters

Although, in Sun and Moon, Ash never caught the regional bird and it was one of the first series with Ash not having a water-type either. However, in this current series, Ash only has 2 Generation 8 Pokémon being Farfetch’d (which will evolve into Sirfetch’d) and Dracovish. This is kind of understandable as Ash isn’t based or travelling around Galar but to be honest it’s still disappointing.

As many of you know, in the most recent episode Goh caught Grookey completing the Galar starter trio (which I’ll cover later), however, a majority of the fandom wanted Ash to have Grookey as they felt personality-wise Ash would be compatible with the Chimp Pokémon and it would continue the long-held tradition of Ash catching one of the new region’s starter Pokémon which is why this latest capture has sparked a lot of controversy with some people calling Goh a thief.

Personally, I would have liked Ash to catch Grookey but in one of the earlier episodes like when they first visited Galar. The reason for this being the storyline development and I know many will argue Ash is a Champion he doesn’t need a starter at this point but Leon in the Sword and Shield games took on and trained the starter that was left over after the Protagonist and Hop had chosen theirs. However, as I mentioned earlier one of the things, I love about the anime is each Pokémon having their own personality and character but also their own traumas and trials to overcome alongside their trainer this can be particularly reflected in the case of Ash and Infernape.

I am not trying to suggest they re-create the Ash and Infernape storyline with Ash and a Grookey but one of the ways a Pokémon develops as a character is through evolution or in some cases like Pikachu and Bulbasaur choosing not to evolve and finding strength in staying the way that they are. Pokémon when they evolve can go through personality-changes whether that be good or bad but having a Pokemon at its first evolutionary stage allows us to go through that development and journey with them.

Which is one of the issues, I have with the series, Ash caught two fully evolved Pokémon being Dragonite and Gengar. Before anyone gives me any grief, I love Dragonite and Gengar’s personalities but as they are fully evolved, we don’t get that same sense of development as we’ve had with some of Ash’s other Pokémon. The only development I could see for these two is potentially learning a new move or overcoming a stronger Pokémon alongside Ash. But having two fully evolved Pokémon makes it difficult to go on a journey of development alongside them. There is also the fact, Dragonite and Gengar are meant to be incredibly strong Pokémon and yet Ash hardly uses them.

Another one of the biggest issues in Journeys as previously mentioned is Ash not fully utilising his team. Whenever, a battle occurs Ash either uses Pikachu or Lucario, the others are kind of pushed to the side and that annoys me so much particularly with Farfetch’d and Gengar. I’ll start with Gengar, Gengar was abandoned by its previous trainer and told to wait in an abandoned building that would later become Cerise Laboratory and in the earlier half of the series (before Riolu) Ash utilised Gengar a lot like in his battle with Visquez and Team Rocket but after Riolu came along Ash used Gengar less and less. In Episode 57, Gengar was taking its anger out on Renji, Chloe and Chrysa and Chloe pointed out that it may have been angry Ash left it behind. This is what I found frustrating; Ash is kind of repeating the behaviour of Gengar’s previous trainer.

Next is Farfetch’d, personality-wise Farfetch’d reminds me of Ash’s Buizel and Hawlucha, with how prideful and aloof it is. I feel like the writers thought they couldn’t flesh out Lucario any further so they decided to focus on Farfetch’d and after two Farfetch’d-focused episodes I can’t help but feel that Farfetch’d is going to evolve in the next episode and that’s what annoys me, that is lazy writing, they haven’t given time to develop Ash and Farfetch’d relationship although it has definitely improved since Episode 56, I feel like it’s too soon. Farfetch’d has so much potential to grow as a character before evolving as I previously mentioned evolution in the Pokémon universe can contribute towards development and I feel like for Farfetch’d they’ll use it in a positive light as Sirfetch’d are noted for their fighting spirit and noble personality. But, as I mentioned before, I would have liked to have seen more development before an evolution.

Then there is Dracovish, this was a completely unexpected capture, however, many fans were surprised by how strong Dracovish was in the games. However, Dracovish was captured in Episode 50 and nearly 10 episodes later, we haven’t seen it… On the other hand, many of Dracovish’s Pokédex entries state that it can’t breathe unless its underwater, therefore, applying that logic to the anime world, may make battling with it difficult...

Team Rocket:

One of the biggest complaints’ viewers have is the series use of Team Rocket. Particularly, using their use of the Gacha machine and using them to create easy conflict. I love Team Rocket; they are basically lovable idiots to me. They’re meant to be “bad guys” but we’ve seen on many occasions they’re kindness and compassion such as rescuing a bunch of wild Ekans and Koffing from a Pokémon hunter and releasing their Arbok and Weezing to protect them whilst they distract the hunter, Meowth sympathising and trying to cheer up Litten following Stoutland’s death are just two examples of their kindness.

Nevertheless, the Journeys series has been utilising them poorly using them as convenient plot device and in my opinion Team Rocket deserve so much better than this. Initially, a lot of viewers may have found the Gacha device interesting but much like Goh throwing a Poké ball at a random Pokémon it got old fast. Similar to one of my issues with Goh, we don’t feel any attachment to the Gacha Pokémon they use unlike other series where they had their own Pokémon which I’ll get on to in a minute.

I feel like the writers missed a huge opportunity, as one of the initial selling points of the series, particularly to the older fans was nostalgia. Team Rocket keep some of their old Pokémon in Team Rocket Headquarters and as the series seems to like staying in Vermillion City, Team Rocket could have collected their old Pokémon and use them similar to when they brought some of their Hoennian Pokémon to Sinnoh. I loved some of Team Rocket’s Pokémon like James’ Mime Jr. and Inkay and Jessie’s Gourgeist and her Yanmega was noted to be strong.

Moreover, in series such as AG, DP and XY they expanded on Team Rocket’s role outside of trying to steal. Jessie showed a promising career in Pokémon Coordinating (particularly in DP) and Pokémon Performing, I loved how she became a rival for Dawn and Serena and particularly in XY, Jessie showed maturity in her loss in the Semi-Finals much to Meowth and Gourgeist’s surprise compared to when she begrudgingly congratulated Dawn on her victory. I just loved the fact in these series they expanded on Team Rocket, showed their friendship and support for one another whether it was cheering each other on from the side-lines or willingly helping Jessie in her pursuits of fame and glory. I realize in Journeys, it’s a bit difficult to expand on Team Rocket’s role in this way but they way they are currently using Team Rocket is to be honest kind of insulting to them as characters who we’ve watched grow over the years.

Chloe, Yamper and Eevee

I’ll get this out the way, I honestly love Chloe, and I’ve loved her development so far, I think they’ve gotten the pacing right for her when they’ve given her focus. I think many people like Chloe because she is similar to Serena, in the sense, she doesn’t have a goal and is discovering what she wants to do in life which is something a lot of people find relatable. I think what would be interesting for Chloe’s character if she does decide to be a Pokémon Professor after initially feeling as though the idea was being forced on her by her peers. Anyways, one of the biggest issues with Journeys is pacing, it takes ages before they actually decide to give a character development and ever since Chloe got Eevee, I feel as though Yamper has been pushed to the side (which is kind of ironic as Chloe calls Ash out on this) and I know Yamper is Professor Cerise’s Pokémon but Yamper acknowledges Chloe more than his own trainer. I feel like a great way to use Yamper was for Professor Cerise to actually give Yamper to Chloe when she was old enough to have a Pokémon, as a lot of Chloe’s earlier development was a result of her bond with Yamper.

Next is Eevee, I love Eevee it is one of my favourite Pokemon, but I also feel similar to Goh, she’s a walking advertisement for the Let’s Go Eevee game as she is unable to evolve. However, the fact that Eevee is unable to evolve makes her a good match for Chloe who is uncertain of her own dreams. Nevertheless, what I don’t understand is why they are trying to promote one of their older games in a new generation (especially when Lana’s Eevee (which don’t get me started) should have filled that role). Also, with Chloe catching Eevee, arguably, she should be joining Ash and Goh frequently, this could allow for Chloe and Eevee to develop and find their own path but aside from joining them twice in Galar, they’ve hardly left Kanto. Which is frustrating because I love Chloe and Eevee and I don’t want it to be another 20 episodes before we get any development from either of them.

Structure

I’ve realized that above I’ve kind of been focusing on the characters and some of the issues surrounding them. Arguably, one of Journeys biggest issues is structure or lack of it for that matter and pacing. Everything is all over the place but I’ll cover each section.

Pacing:

One of my biggest gripes with the series is pacing, lately we have been having back-to-back filler episodes and I don’t mind having filler every now and then to give us a break as you don’t want a show to be too content-heavy. And I don’t mind when the filler is at least entertaining but that Gulpin episode from two weeks ago was absolutely pointless, I’m sorry. So much stuff has taken place off-screen and Ash went up by 500 ranks to Rank 415 they could have taken out some of the filler episodes and used it to show Ash training at least or put it towards actual development for characters like Chloe and Eevee or Farfetch’d.

Another issue, I have with the pacing and I think a lot of you will hopefully agree is the pace of Goh catching a legendary Pokemon (which I’m in the middle about). Normally, around the end of the series, all of the respective characters have found or are closer to their goal like Dawn and Serena coming Runner-Up in their respective competitions or having confidence to keep pursuing their goal. This is normally, in the last series of that generation’s anime adaptation but Goh’s already achieved such a huge milestone towards his goal in the second series. I can’t help but feel as though this has been completely rushed.

Continuity:

Continuity in Journeys is strange, I can see it as a strength and a weakness. I’ll start off with the positives, continuity-wise I like the fact that Journeys at least references to past episodes and characters for example episode 57 Chloe’s younger brother says he’s going to a sleepover at his friend, Jinny’s house, the girl with the Feebas from episode 31. Or episode 47, Goh uses his prize from winning the Pokémon Eating Contest to have a dessert tour around Unova’s Castelia City. These small examples of continuity are something I can appreciate. But I can’t help but feel some of the past characters returning are merely fan-service for the older fans, so far, some of the character returns haven’t really contributed to the series’ narrative aside from the Alola episode contributing to Goh’s development.

A good example of utilising a past character is the Wallace Cup arc, with May and Dawn helping each other out of a losing streak and allowing Dawn to renew her confidence. I think no matter the outcome, both Coordinators gained something from the tournament even if Dawn lost to May, I think she would have had a regained her confidence but winning the Aqua Ribbon allowed her to re-affirm her self-belief and skills.

Episodic vs Linear:

Now I’ve watched a few videos on this to have a better understanding, the reason why Journeys feels so unstructured is that for some reason the writers chose to go down an episodic route instead of linear. The best example I know of episodic storytelling is Phineas and Ferb where characters and elements are introduced and can come back. But utilising episodic storytelling in a series like Pokémon feels like an unnatural choice we’re meant to be following these characters and their journeys towards achieving their goals whereas in a linear narrative this would be a lot clearer.

The Setting:

A lot of people have an issue with the fact that a series, that promises travelling the world, it really fell flat. As I have previously mentioned, so far only 2/5 of the episodes have taken place in other regions, most of the time Ash and Goh end up staying in Vermillion City. With the way things are currently being executed, I honestly would have preferred a Sword and Shield anime, with Ash at least travelling around Galar, it would allow for the Galar story to be more fleshed out instead of shoe-horned into a four-episode arc and with the announcement of the Sinnoh re-makes, I feel as though they are going to promote that in some way in the anime later on. (Perhaps with a Dawn cameo).

As I’ve been writing this, I’ve kind of realised one gripe I have with the anime that has become rather blatant as of late. That is the commercialism in the anime, I understand the anime is utilised to promote the game and re-makes of games but with this latest series the commercialism is blatant and honestly annoying. An early example of using the anime to promote a game was the Johto arc in DP to promote HeartGold and SoulSilver. Whereas, currently we have Goh, the human advertisement for Pokémon Go and Chloe’s Eevee promoting Let’s Go Eevee (which I honestly don’t see the need to advertise older games).

The controversary with Grookey…

Needless to say, the latest episode of Pokemon Journeys has sparked a lot of debate and anger particularly from Goh haters who have declared him a thief and are dropping the anime. There are some people who don’t mind Goh catching Grookey, they may have disliked the storyline they used for Goh to catch Grookey. I’ve made my feelings clear, that I would have preferred for Grookey to have been introduced much earlier and for Ash to have caught it.

However, I do have an issue with the way Goh caught Grookey as I can kind of understand why people are calling Goh a thief, I wouldn’t go that far maybe immoral at the most. The initial concept of Grookey belonging to Team Rocket was interesting but the whole story falls flat when they don’t give us any backstory like how did Team Rocket catch Grookey? why was Grookey so desparate to stay with Goh? was Grookey being mistreated by Team Rocket?

Honestly, if Grookey was being mistreated by Team Rocket, I’d understand why it’d want to leave them but this is Jessie, James and Meowth, the trio that released Mimikyu and Mareanie since they didn’t want them to be left in Team Rock Headquarters because they’d thought Mimikyu and Mareanie would be unhappy. So, I honestly can’t see the mistreatment storyline.

Also, the fact that Grookey smashed its own Poké Ball to gain its freedom kind of undermines other storylines that have seen Pokémon being abused by their trainers as they could have arguably smashed their Poké Balls to gain their freedom. Although, you could argue there is an element of fear in these cases.

I feel like if they built up the story more, I may have been more accepting but I kind of find it hypocritical in the sense Goh wants this Pokémon that belongs to someone else and it smashes its own Poké Ball to be with him. Whereas, its bad when Team Rocket try to steal someone else’s Pokémon but its okay for Goh because he’s the protagonist. Considering this is a kids anime that kind of sends the wrong message. I honestly would have found it more interesting if Grookey decided to stay with Team Rocket that would have been an interesting twist with Team Rocket having a starter Pokémon on their side. Plus, we know, James loves his Grass-types.

Conclusion:

Basically, I needed to get this off my chest and honestly, I feel much better for it. No Pokémon anime series is perfect by any means but lately I feel as though the writing has taken a huge dip and it has taken the enjoyment out of the series. I’m still trying to give the series a chance and hopefully I can warm to Grookey under Goh’s ownership, I think if the episodic formula has taken away the storytelling element that I love about the Pokémon series.

I have honestly never seen a Pokémon anime divide the community so much but I’m hoping that things begin to improve particularly if Ash’s Farfetch’d evolves in the next episode.

[popculturebuffet]

Ducktales: The Treasure of the Lost Lamp Movie Reviewcap! (Patreon Stretch Goal)

Hello all you happy people! And we have a special review today for two reasons. The first is that this is my second patreon stretch goal review, having hit the 15 dollar goal back in march thanks to my wonderful friend Emma, the same patreon whose responsible for the Green Eggs and Ham Reviews,  who helped me hit the 15 dollar goal.  As a result you fine people are getting three movie reviews each based on a Disney Afternoon Movie with Treasure of the Lost Lamp today, a goofy movie at the end of the motnh for  a weeklong tribute to my favorite dogmandadguy.  Extremley was going to be part of it but the length of this review convinced me otherwise, but I will be doing it this summer so keep an ear out. If you want to help me hit my next stretch goals do yourselve a favor and zip on over to my patreon YOU CAN FIND MY PATREON HERE. My next stretch goal at “OH Look 20 Dollars” would give everyone patreon and not, a monthly review of Darkwing Duck as decided by my patrons, reviews of BOTH season 2 mini series from Ducktales 87, introducing Fenton to the world and blighting it with Bubba before the 2017 series fixed him, and as a brucey bonus added last month a review of Danny Phantom the Ultimate Enemy. And if that wasn’t enough if you help me get to the goal after that at 25 unlocks another trilogy of disney film reviews, this time for the proud family and recess movie and the best kim possible movie, and dcom period, so the drama as well as Bryan Lee O’ Malley’s two stand alone graphic novels, lost at sea and seconds for you Scottaholics in the audience.

The other reason now the shilling’s done. is that the plan WAS to review this back to back with Treasure of The Found Lamp, to the point the orginal review had a whole thing about that, why it was delayed etc... but now that review’s been scrapped all together as something sudden and wonderful happened. After just kinda giving up someone came through with a translation of Della’s first apperance so presumibly i’ll be doing that as part of the build up to mother’s day, and since I still want ot do maternal instincts too, and already had to let the Floyd Gottfredson birthday special slide away as well... it had to go as I want to leave the only open space on the schedule for the lovely person who found the story for me. But this review is still done, i’m very proud of it so join me under the cut won’t you?

Behind The Scenes: Before I get into it i’d just like to note this article from SyFy Wire. It , along with articles I found via wikipedia citations, was an invaluable resource. 

The film was an experiment: It was an experiment to see if one of their tv properties could bring in theatrical money, to see if a movie made on a cheaper budget and still rake in decent money, to see if a film could be made being outsourced to several diffrent places, and to see what one of those places, their recently aquiried french stuido, could handle this kind of work. 

The film, if succesful would be the first of Disney’s MovieToons line, a series of films based on their shows. As you can tell by the fact only this movie and Goof Troop happened and the Movie Toons label wasn’t applied to that one it very much failed. While the film was warmly recevied by people who liked the show general audiences didn’t turn out for it. As a result the MovieToons label was scrapped, future projects with it were canceled.. but the stellar work put in by the french stuidio lead to it perserviering for several more decades and lead to them working on the Goofy Movie, which we’ll get to later this month but needless to say was a MUCH bigger hit with a much bigger budget. 

As for why the film failed... I have two theories. THe first is that parents were stupid back then and didn’t want to pay to see something on the big screen they could see on tv’s. This is a stupid mentality to me as generally a movie of a tv show puts in a ton of extra effort and usually goes bigger and dosen’t go home. It’s a likely theory given most liscened films of the era didn’t do quite well, with all three hasbro films tanking. And look I get Transformers the Movie is cheesy and killed a lot of people’s childhood toys, but damn if it ain’t aweosme.. and also something I need to cover at some point. Thankfully this died out by later in the 90′s with Rugrats getting a hugely succesful if flawed film, a better sequel and a third one that was also a crossover with the wild thornberries. 

And even now in 2020 we’re getting the Loud House and Rise of the TMNT movies sometimes this summer, we were SUPPOSED to have gotten the bobs burgers movie this summer but arne’t because Disney is being a dick about it.

And we got a phineas and ferb movie last year. With this trend hopefully thsi means we’ll get a Ducktales 2017 movie at some point since season 4 left a huge sequel hook laying right there to grab for a feature film.  One final note: The film was conceptually thought up as a 5 part serial like “Treasure of the Golden Suns”, “Catch as Cash Can”, “SuperDucktales” and “Time is Money, something that DOES show as the movie weirdly has act breaks. In a feature film. Yup. 

The Guest Cast:

I won’t go into the full cast since I’ve sung Alan Young and Russi Taylor’s praises PLENTY on this blog before, and I plan to go into Beakly and Launchpad’s actors when they show up in the pilot movie. But i’d be remiss if i didn’t talk about our three guest actors for our three new parts. 

First up is Merlock voiced by legend and if I had a hall of fame, hall of famer Christopher Lloyd.. I need to get me one of those. Lloyd is of course known for playing Doc Brown in back to the future but has done countless other films, voicework, and other good stuff. Among his MASSIVE filmography includes The Back to the Future Trilogy (Already mentioned it but it bears repeating), Star Trek III, Who Framed Roger Rabbit as the pants destroyingly terrifying Judge Doom, The Addams Family duology as fester, a role rip torn would ironcially play for the animated series made to captalize on said movie, Hey Arnold! The Movie, The Oogieloves in The Big Ballon Adventure (Look everybody needs money sometimes okay?), and Art of the Deal: The Movie, which was not, thankfully an ego filating nightmare made by trump himself but a film made by funny or die parodying his terrible book and having Llloyd return as Doc Brown. TV Wise he’s known for Taxi, Back to the Future the Animated Series, Cyberchase and he most recently popped up on Big City Greens. How I missed that ep I.. do know as I haven’t watched season 2. Gonna fix that later this month. Lloyd is utterly awesome, a great guy and thankfully still alive at the time of this writing, so I was happy to have him here. 

Less familiar to me but still known is Rip Taylor, a comedian known for his flamboyant unique way of speech and his marvelous mustache. He showed up in things occasionally and always seemed like the nicest guy and his passing in late 2019 truly is sad. He does a terrific job here but more on that in a moment. 

Finally we have Richard Libertini, a comedian I never really saw in anything besides this who according to IMDB was most famous for his ablility to do a foreign accent. I REALLY hope all of them aren’t as horribly racist as this one. We’ll.. get to that in a sec as it’s time for the plot!

A Treasure Uncovered:

We open our film gorgeously. The animation is great in the film, having some rough edges I chalk up to the film’s hectic production, the studio being new at working at disney properties, and the film not being meant for HD. That being said a few rough spots here and there aside.. the film looks ungodly gorgeous. Like most theatrical films based on a cartoon it takes an already great style and makes it look great. It feels like a more fluid evolution of the cartoons look and it’s a shame we didn’t get more movies in this style for both this show and others, ESPECIALLY Darkwing Duck. Can you imagine a Darkwing Duck movie with this lush animation? Hopefully we’ll get one eventually. 

So our heroes are going to somewhere in the Middle East. That’s.. that’s all wikipedia gives me and all the film gives me. As usual Scrooge is after treasure in this case the Treasure of Collie Baba, the greatest thief there ever was based obviously off Ali Baba from 1001 nights and that one Beastie Boys song. 

It’s here we find the WORST thing about the film, the thing that makes this a hard one to watch depsite otherwise being pretty good, and that makes my skin crawl knowing i’m a white man and a BUNCH of white guys, Ducktales series creator who did the voice casting for this character, the writers who wrote him, the direector disney them fucking selves who thought this was okay. 

The film has some horrible steroytping. It starts with a bunch of backgorund guys surronding Scrooge, with crooked teeth and steotypical voices. This on it’s own is odious. 

It somehow gets worse. Then we meet one of our antagonists. We meet Dijon. 

This Fucking Guy 

Djon is horribly offensive reminding me of other such luminaries in being ungodly offensive yet somehow getting put to film as Jar Jar Binks (With all respeect to his poor actor Ahmed Best, this is not his fault), Rob Schinder as a Sterotypically asian preist, Skids and Mudflap, Rob Schinder as a sterotypically mexican bandit, The Whitewashed cast of The Last Airbender, and Rob Schinder as a stereotypically asian preist. What i’m saying is Djon is an AWFUL, horribly offensive character.. and that Rob Schinder should be shot up into space, not to watch cheesy movies, he’s not funny enough for that, but instead to be sent to a satlitie that’s liveable, but also filled to the brim with spring loaded boxing gloves. Just tons of boxing gloves that feel like getting punched by a heavewight boxer all hidden... they could hit his legs, his face, his nuts, his face and his nuts, the point is he’s in constnat pain unless he moves carefully. 

And lest you think i’m exaggerating for starters this is his design. 

It just screams “vaugely but sterotpyically middle eastern” along with cowardly. The fact he’s also a literal rat is just the icing on the cake made of broken glass, shrapnel and broken DVD’s of Transformers; Revenge of the Fallen. They say if you eat a reveng eof the fallen dvd John Tutoro appears at the foot of your bed and watches you while you sleep.. and by they I mean me. It was a bad bet. I got rid of him with some insese and a bribe of five dollars. 

Oh but that’s just design.. when he talks it’s MUCH worse. His voice is like if they took Apu from the simpsons and said “This but MORE offensive”, and his perosnality is WORSE. He’s a thief.. and not in the endearing loveable rogue way but he’s a pick pocket and a running “Gag’ is that he’ll often grab eveyrthing within reahc. As the deisgn shows he’s a coward running at every opportunity. Oh and to top it all off he’s the willing servant of the white coded, given all ducks in this series are white coded and voiced bby white actors, big bad. And the actor is naturally VERY white to make this cocktail of offensivness so complete that if Disney ever got rid of this film I GUARANTEE the republcian party would be running in with accusations of cancel culture gone amok and never shutting up about this like they did the muppets. Which for the record THEY DIDN’T CANCEL THEM, YOUR POINT IS ILLEGITMATE, THEY JUST WANTED TO BE SENSTIVE YOU GHOULS. 

I do have a reason for bringing up Disney’s content warnings... most damming of all given just how DEEPLY uncomfortbale this character is.. there isn’t one for this movie. I double checked: There isn’t even wanring notes on the website. It’s just.. on there. And given just how ghastly a sterotype Djon is.. that’s not right. Seriously they DID put them on certain episodes of the show, theyk now this sort of thing is wrong and they done wrong.. but for NO reason they haven’t done so for a film released 31 years ago. Around the same time as the series and just offensive as that show at it’s worst if not more so. This is flatly inexcusable.. par for the course for Disney’s incompetence but still horribly furstrating, disgusting and shameful.. which has been the theme of the last three days really. I expect better because when it comes to putting that warning label on this stuff, they usually are better. First the scheduling mixup and now this. You already do a handful of things wrong Disney why add this to the list?!

It’s just draining not only to run into another Disney Fuckup after a weekend of dealing with one of their worst in recent memory, but just to watch Djon. To see this horrible caractrure saunter onto the screen and go on with his harmful schtick, to see that THIS is what Ducktales 87 reduced non white people to more often than not.  It’s remarkable just how throughly and awesomely Frank and Matt completely and totally reversed this. Instead of horrible sterotypes in the reboot, we got TONS of loveable people of color, an endearing latino hero, a smart african american buisness woman who takes no shit but is still a consumate professional, and an egyptian HERO with an intresting story and a strong moral code instead of this horrible reminder that racisim in media was such an afterthought not ONE person brought this up during the scyfy wire stuff or in any inteview i’ve seen. No one cared. Djon was POPULAR enough that he got three episode sin the series. THREE FUCKING EPISODES. This film could be GOOD.. but it’s just so bogged down EVERY FUCKING TIME this artists interpreitation of what Tucker Carlson sees when he looks at a middle eastern person I had to pause to compose myself and had to take a break writing this review to avoid tyiping this in all caps and using the phrase YOU RACIST MOTHERFUCKERS every other sentence. And again i’m white, I get this is second hand offensiveness.. I do... but it dosen’t mean I can’t be offended other white people were so callous about other cultures behaviors this happened.

And what makes me feel worse.. is that I just sorta... never thought about white people voicing non white characters. Things like this I noticed sure, I realize now part of the reason I didn’t like this movie the first time I saw it was this alex jones version of a looney tune, but I do feel shame for not noticing or caring long before this. Sure I loved it when a character of color got played by a person of color.. but I didn’t realize just how deep that problem was and how LONG it went on for before the outcry post george floyd and the call to action lead to most shows still going course correcting. It’s why stuff like this extra botehrs me: because THIS was just as okay at the time. No one blinked twice about this and odds are the creators involved still haven’t. And that.. that’s just terrible and it hurts to think about and  I still have most of the movie to go.  

The Pyramid of Peril:

So we do get a gorgeous unvewling scene of a box Scrooge found out about from Collie Baba’s horde that should lead them to the treasure. This scene reminds me of Indina Jones.. and I bring this up because the poster was specifically made to mimick an indinia jones poster, to the point of getting drew struzan to do it. THe creator of Ducktales objected..l but I do not get WHY. While I”m not sure if he had yet, Speilberg flat out admits the Carl Barks comics were an inspiration for Indina Jones, with the iconic bolder chase coming from a similar scene in one of Barks Stories. Gotta cover that too. So yeah I don’t get not wanting an indina jones style poster when both were inspiried by the same work and it’s just simple logic and it looks so neat. Thank you. 

Scrooge finds seemingly just clothes.. and a map. Jeff Dunham’s Most Racist Puppet reports to his master, Merlock. Merlock is a.. meh villian. Christopher Lloyd does try.. but Lock is your standard evil overlord wants to take over the world type. He dosen’t have much depth, or personality and only his style saves him from dragging the film down along with Dana Carvey’s most racist disguise in master of disguise. He does have a deent shape shifting gimick and being played by Christopher Lloyd means he’s acted TREMENDOUSLY. Alan Young was apparently in awe watching him work and that’s wonderful to hear. The guy did his best. Weirdly Merlock would show up in tons of other works, mostly video games.. but even weirder he NEVER showed up in ducktales 2017. Both Djon and Gene would, Djon thankfully renamed we’ll get to all of that tommorow thank god. I need it after this. But Frank has outright said they didn’t use Merlock because there simply wasn’t anything they could do with him they couldn’t dow ith magica. My likely guess is the might of found a way to revamp him EVENTUALLY, it’s not like radical revamps weren’t there thing come on, they just had way more stories with Magica and didnd’t get around to it before the show was canceled. Just make him some sort of evil god or something. it’s what I might do. There’s a lot of angles with him. Though I would’ve still gotten christopher lloyd back. I mean most of the recasting is good but he’s still alive and deserved a better shot at things. 

So Merlock sends Djonn to go with scrooge as his guide to find the treasure, as there’s something of imense power within it. And I gotta ask WHY does Merlock need a minon. No really. This isn’t a situation like reboot magica where he’s trapped in another realm. He can shapeshift into any animal. We only see him use falcon, rat, cockroach and bear but theoritically he can become anything and bear alone is still a LOT. Why does he need this sterotype even other sterytopes ar eashamed of? The film dosen’t NEED Djonn. Just let Christopher Lloyd monologue and leave this post 911 propogranda cartoon at home. 

So our heroes nad rejected jar jar prototype head into the desert, and seemingly find nothing before finding a small pyramid all while Merlock follows desecretley as a mighty hawk. 

Scrooge makes the boys and Djon dig... because they clearly forgot the “work hard” part of his ethos. 

Our heroes unveil the pyramid... and while Merlock SAYS he searched the desert and I get it’s hard to see thourgh all of that.. the dude is immortal, had decades to search and had Mickey Rooney there on standby to force him to go comb the desert. I have an artist rendering of that hang on

So our heroes enter the pyramid and it goes.. really how you’d expect: there’s a bunch of traps our brave explorers have to pass, the boys minintpret a juinor woodchuck saying about loosing your marbles to mean using the ones they actually have which geninely comes in handy as they trip the traps and Rob SChinder as a carrot stumbles into one. Also launchpad is wearing a hawaiin shirt and shades. This has no baring on the plot, but it does bring the movie up a notch in my book and I question why the reboot never used this outfit. Then again they also never properly used Donald’s Quack Pack Outfit (Which bad show or not, is objectively awesome), or his Quack Shot Indiana Jones Riff Outfit, so  it’s not like there isn’t a presdecnt for not giving a character a cool costume change from a previous medium. I really should do a top 12 missed opportunities list for the 2017 cartoon.. the ideas for stuff are really piling up. 

OUr heroes eventually find the treasure which has insidiously clever security the more I think about it: at first I thought it had none, just a pit with some... scorpions? I mean their supposed to be but they look like they crawled out of the same stygian hole in the sky Doofus crawled out of. And if your asking me “wait which Doofus” the answer is both. Both these abominations crawled out of a stygian hole in the sky.

But the treasure is on a platform surrounded by scoprions with the only way out being the trap filled way they came in. Unless someone comes in with a full team and a bunch of lootin sacks, they aren’t getting out with EVERYTHING. They can steal SOME of the treasure but there’s no way to get any signifigant portion... and the team thing itself is an issue, something Collie defintely predicted being a thief himself: while some thieves can work well as a team, hence why we have four oceans movies 3/4 damn good, and for the record 12 is the bad one, 8 is how you do a soft reboot and a female led reboot right, a good chunk of professional crooks will turn on each other or try and swinldle... and tha’ts dangerous in a trap filled temple but hey some criminals ain’t so smart.  If they all were Rudy Gulliani wouldn’t have two razzies for preparing to pull his pants down, and have waved his phone around on tv like a dare for future adminstrations to arrest the shit out of him would he? 

But Scrooge has his family so they get loading. But not before Webby finds the lamp. Not knowing about it Scrooge has no intrest in it, but Webby does. We also get a really simple but hilarious gag where SCrooge dickers over the idea for a second.. before Webby picks up a Jeweled tiara to possibly take instead. The best gags to me are often the ones that just let the character’s perosnalities take the lead and bounce off each other. It’s why when I reviewed the four lilo and stitch crossovers recently I harped on character interaction as their biggest weakness: it’s what MAKES a good work for me. It’s why my faviorite comics and shows often follow a loveable group of disfunctional misfits. I like a group of big personalities who despite in theory should NOT be able to work making it work anyway. And it’s honeslty what’s made Scrooge last so long: Scrooge on his OWN is awesome.. but iwth the boys, donald, and in the case of this series and the reivival Webby and Launchpad, with people to bounce off of who he contrasts heavily with, from Launchapd’s buffonery to Webby’s inehrent sweetness in both versions, to the boys genuine honesty and sense of adventure.... it makes him truly stand out. He’s a great character on his own, don’t get me wrong.. but it’s the people around him that give him chances to show WHY. A good character on it’s own is fine and dandy.. a good character with other good characters around them is where it gets truly special. 

Merlock naturally bursts in and in a VERY Black Heron move needlesly outs what micheal bay sees when he closes his eyes as a bad guy... no really he grabs the guy with his talons as he captures the treasure and reveals he’s a bad guy. I don’t even get why keep Djonn alive. He’s done all Merlock possibly could’ve needed and Merlock is ruthless... this makes no sense and only happens because they need Djonn for later in the plot.

Our heroes barely escape, rafting out on the platform itself in a thrilling sequence.. but it’s the one right after that catches my attention. Scrooge utterly defeated, having searched for this treasure for forty years and unresponsive to everyone else. The anmation, coupled with the incomprable Alan young’s acting makes this the highlight of the film for me. Beneath the armor of wealth and skill.. is only a poor old man who just lost something he’s been chasing after most of his life. Scrooge tries his hardest not to be vunerable and both shows and the original comics all use that so when he truly is devistated like this, and i’ts belivible since this treasure is a personal goal of his and as someone who has had things that they seek out specifically, loosing them always hurts. It hurts to ALMOST reach a goal only to have it crumble out under you

But while this alone is good.. what’s next makes it great. Webby sweetly offers up the lamp. Scrooge turns it down, and her genuine gesture reinvgorates him and reminds us of who he is “I’ll find it if it takes another 40 years”> Scrooge may be bitter, mean and selfish a lot of the time.. but deep down, he’s a good man and one who will not give up, and a momentary setback can only stop him so long as long as he has his family to remind him of who he truly is.. and what’s truly important. It’s genuinely sweet and to me is also a reminder of why 87 Webby is a good character: Shes’ not perfect, her main personality trait is often Girl Sterotype”.. but she’s a genuinely sweet small child with a huge heart. It’s telling that while 17′ Webby is almost completely diffren,t and far better, that heart remains her biggest strength. Sure her reboot self could kill a man nad no one would ever find the body, but it’s her heart and empathy that makes that possible and makes her Webby.  That inherent loving nature is what makes Webby webby wether she’s a toddler having a tea party or a tween getting ready to intergoate a guy with a meat tenderizer while saying ‘Cute girl stuff”. 

Gene Genie Let’s Himself Go:

It’s a few days later and this is the point where it REALLY becomes obvious this was written as a bunch of episodes. Though to the film’s credit while it does ake this feel like a compliation movie as a result... it dosen’t hamper the film’s quality, condiment from Rush Limbaghs’ hot dog stand does that just fine, but once you notice it it’s impossible to unotice it. Weirdly though it seems chunked up into four episodes rather than the usual five, likely cutting down an episode, though I can’t see where they cut out material frankly if they did and i’ts just as likely they woudl’ve had to make one to fill in the space.

So Scrooge is in a mood, being grumpy with his secretary Mrs. Featherly, quackfaster in all but name, and having to be sent home. So while Duckworth goes to fetch him Webby polishes her treasure at long last readying for a tea party, something the boys roundly reject because their sexist little twits and swo were the writers or executies who assumed all little boys act the same. It’s easily my biggest pet peeve with the series as a whole: anytime this crops up with the boys it turns them into the worst dicks imaginable. It’s telling this, being mean about her wantin ga tea party with her surrogate brothersi s TAME. Normally they’ll say she can’t do things because she’s a girl or mock her hobies outright instead of just be mildly dickish. And while she dosen���t look much younger Webby is VERY CLEARLY, in this series anyway, supposed to be say 5 or 6 to the boys 8-10. 7 at most. SHe’s a small child and while it is realistic for older kids to bully younger ones, it’s not fun to watch. It’s why I get annoyed at all the big sibling bully characters.. some work, but most aren’t fun to watch because there’s nothing funny or intresting about it. It’s the same deal here. 

Thankfully that quickly goes away as the lamp moves when Webby rubs it and does so again to prove it did move. Huey finishes it and we’re introduced to Gene, the best part of the film.  Gene is a Genie and he takes a second to dart around before messing with the appliances in the kitchen, as he was last around during the time 1001 Nights Came About. Cleverly though, and so we thankfully don’t have 80 dozen fishout of water jokes that have already been done before. As you can probably guess i’m not a huge fan of time travel fish out of water stuff. Now from another dimensoin or planet, i’m on board with with Star Vs, Steven Universe and Sym-Bionic Titan being great examples of this, as is the comic resident alien. (Despite having the wonderous Alan Tuduk the show sounds way more mean spirited and misses the entire point of the comic as given by the author in the credits, i.e. that the alien is supposed to NOT be a threat and just be gently waiting for a ride) The inverse is also good with Amphbia and owl house, taking a human and plopping them into our world. But time travel stuff just usually runs the same beats of “look at the shiny thing” and what not. The only time i’ve sene something SIMILAR work is with thor where their society is SIMILAR to vikings time but still it’s own thing.. it also gave us a classic gag in..

So yeah i’m glad they dropped this and instead had a clever way around it: Gene reads the encylopedia at the mansion. Granted it’s Scrooge so I don’t know how current it is and given this came out in 1990 thus HOW racist it is. It’s not a questoin of IF it was, but how much.

But having caught up the kids confront him with the fact he has to grant wishes. This lamp runs on what I now realize are Aladdin rules: Whoever currently holds the Lamp is the Genie’s master, they only get three wishes, and that dosen’t reset if it changes hands. The only big diffrence from the usual is Gene dosen’t have to TELL them about the wishes like Genie did, and Gene very begrudginly agrees to it. He also seem’s phsyically pained when doing so. 

So since all 12 know about him, each of the kids gets a wish though it seems unfair with HDL. Their one person, they shoudln’t get 9 wishes just because their brain is spread out over three bodies. 

This film continues the weird simliarties to Aladdin by attaching rules though they instead come up as a result of our heroes talking rather than the Genie just flat out tleling them: both share the “you can’t wish for more wishes” thing, a common rule in these stories and usually only broken nowadays as a clever twist as the rule is SO common place, not having it is a twist. But it is there for a reason: to limit the sheer power of a reality warping wish. The wishes can also only go so far. In a nice line, when Huey, Dewey or Louie suggests wishing for peace one earth, Gene says “No pipe dreams’ He can’t bend people or reality on THAT scale. He can bend reality as we find out, but it’s smaller scales like turning someone’s possesions over ot someone else, warping the bin into a castle, or bringing inanitamte objects to limited life. Still HUGE feats worth of a genie, so Gene’s power isn’t so nerfed it’s unusuable, but it does explain why his evil pervious ownder Merlock, more ont hat in a bit too, didn’t just wish to have eternal dominon over the earth or something. Gene can do just about anything but he can’t change the world on a fundemental level. 

And I do LIKE having rules in wished based stories like this, I chalk it up to growing up with Fairly Odd Parents... though they eventually went too far in the oppsoitie direction, pulling rules out of their ass to suit the episode, instead of simply having some very standard, very understandable rules that still pose challenges but don’t outright cheat so the episode can happen. 

So Webby does her first wish.. and wishes for a Baby Elephant, something Gene is against as he prefers they keep the wishes small: otherwise he gets found out, and the fight over him begins. So one of the boys wishes him away. Or Webby does. Point is it’s gone though not before Beakly sees it and Scrooge smells something is up. Our heroes try to hide gene, but gene thankfully simply dresses up like a modern kid and thus is able to pass as a friend of there staying for the night. 

So with the rules established and what not the kids find a clever solution: they simply go a ways away from the mansion into the woods, far enough from town to avoid any suspcion, and same iwth the mansion and just wish for all kinds of stuff: a giant bunch of ice cream toys, standard kid wish fufillment but it’s nice... in part because the kids treat Gene like one of them. Wihle they STARTED asking him about the wishes, this starts the bonding process. Soon he will be part of the hive mind.. SOON. 

Until then though after using another wish to make scrooge not mad at them for coming home late and missing dinner, that night we find out Gene’s backstory.... and it’s an utter tearjerker. As it turns out Merlock wants him back because he’s Gene’s former master and as you’d guess.. it was NOT a happy existnace, used contstnatly to do horrible things with no power to stop himself. Pompeii and Atlantis were both directly Merlock’s fault and it was only Collie Baba stealing the lamp that put an end to his hell. He also answers the two obvious questions botht he audeiince and the boys have: How the hell is Merlock still alive and shoudln’t he be out of wishes then? The first is simple. Unlike pretty much every DBZ Villian whose WANTED to do so, Merlock wished for immortality first chance he got, taking the Zamasu route instead and thus leaving him free. 

As for the wishes thing it turns out his amulet, in adition to shapeshifting, also gives him extra wishes becuase fuck it. 

But the boys sweetly offer to protect him. 

The next day, Apu’s Cousin let’s Merlock know the maps in the mansion and Merlock has him help sneak in with Merlock taking rat form. This backfires as Mrs. Beakley notices the form and chases after him with a broom

Meanwhile Webby has her tea party with Gene after he and the boys played cops and robbers earlier, and he’s bored.. though nicely not because it’s a girly thing, but because the stuffed animals aren’t alive and she naively has him fix that. This leads to 

Which sadly is jsut scrooge vs a duck toy but admit it, you want that movie for Disney Plus yesterday. Call Charles Band Disney. CALL CHARLES BAND! 

Whelp Scrooge Still Sucks:

Scrooge takes for a turn for the obnoxious in the next part, but i’ts fine by me as it’s part of the plot. Naturally this reinactment of Cult of Chucky has lead to Scrooge finding out about the Genie. To his credit, Scrooge is tactical about his wishes. As said by the Duck himself “I could wish for a diamond, no the world’s biggest dimaond, no ten world’s biggest diamond, no a diamond mind, no the MINING INDUSTRY!”

The sheer power this gives him is TERRIFYING, both because of his status.. and because unlike the kids who all wished for simple kid stuff and used up their wishes quickly, he both gets how much he can do with this and could conquer the world economy if he truly wanted to. 

The obnoxious part comes in as he treats Gene as not a person, figuring he’s just there and forces him into the lamp despite the kids protests after Gene grants his first wish: Collie Baba’s treasure. It also dosen’t feel like the wishing nor him using the lamp to get the tresure back goes against his hard work ethos: for the former while he is getting all this magically, he’s still having ot use his wits to get the most out of it, and he did earn the lamp itself square. For the latter, he already earned the treasure square too and had it stolen. He’s onlyg etting back what’s by all rights HIS. Granted he plans on giving most of it up for a tax break but still it’s his by right. 

However the reason his assholery works is twofold: first it’s Scrooge. While he’s not a TERRIBLE person, in the comcis and this cartoon he isn’t a GOOD person either. He DOES have a good heart and will usually do the right thing, but his first instnct is always to get more money and to be a cantakerous old bastard to eveyrone and everything. While he’s subtly grew out of “I hate eveyrone and everyone hates me” as his guiding principal, it’s still his defualt reaction to most situations. But he first relents by letting Gene attend the party, part of why the Collie Baba thing stung so bad was that he’s told the historical society he’d get the treasure for years only to come back empty handed, if shrunken. But he still manages to have a good time while Asok and Merlock infiltrate.. well I’mRunningOutofINsultingNIcknamesCanYouTell steals the silverware. Yes... that.. that really happens. 

Look we’re almost done, i’m almost free of this racist mummies curse. Let’s continue. Gene sees melock and freaks and drags SCrooge with him and while at First Scrooge is cranky...

No but now I want a Donkey Kong Country crossover too dammmit. And to talk about those games. Another thing for the list. But Scrooge is righ tot be a bit surly...

Okay now your just pushing it. As Gene whisked him away without telling him anything other than vauge worries... but then he gets a full idea of why Gene’s so terrified when Merlock shapeshifts into a bear and starts breaking the door down. Eh, could be worse. 

Gene shrinks them to escape and Merlock leaves thinking they fled but leaves Skids Minus Mudflap to go look for them. Scrooge sneaks out but bumps into a cart running from the photo you see when you look up stereotype on google. I mean I assume.. let’s try it. 

Huh you know I HOPED but I never expected... 

So Google Proving My Point plans to give his lamp to the master because of his weird Torgo-Esque obession with helping a man who clearly wants to murder him but takes his sweet time doing so because plot, and Gene figuring this COULDN’T POSSIBLY go as bad as Melock getting him urges the dummy to keep him and make his own wishes.

This goes about as well as you’d expect....

Wiped Out With A Wish:

Scrooge returns home to find Watto has wished to take his poessions, fortune, everything and Scrooge gets thrown in jail for breaking into his own house. We get two great moments back to back. The first is Scrooge lamenting loosing his fortune in jail, and realizing the sheer power and risk of the lamp, especially since he worked hard to earn it, every bit of it.. and Sam Wilson’s 70′s Backstory came in and took it all in an instant. 

The second is Scrooge’s family coming for him, including Launchpad , Beakly and Webby obviously and bailing him out. Though Beakly is UNGOLDLY annoying in this scene, sobbing hysterically and adding nothing and it’s not nearly as funny as the  film thinks. Turns out Goliath getting buried wrapped in chains threw them out. 

Scrooge takes a bit to rebound from all this.. but eventually realizes something: he knows the security of the bin inside and out. He had it put in after all. So it’d be easy enough to break in. So they gotta break in to break out the lamp, undo this nightmare, and END THIS MOVIE. Seriously this review has taken two days  as is I do NOT want to miss my invincible review. 

So they break into the bin, and it’s a tightly paced Scene, scrooge going in one way while the kids go the other and we even get a nice callback as the marbels come in handy to get past one of the traps. It’s just a good scene. it’s only real flaw is that Launchapd just sorta disappears as does Duckworth despite the fact their in a plane, and the bin later gets turned into a floating castle. Kinda a plot hole to not have Launchpad crash in to save htem just saying. 

Scrooge eventually does get to Djonn, whose been ignoring the imminent threat of Merlock while Gene sweats it out... and this backfires horribly as Merlock hitched a ride as a roach (Though there was a hilarious scene of him getting fried constnatly by lasers when Louie went through a laser hallway, as while Louie had the directions, it dind’t take into account passengers on your head. 

So Merlock remanifests in full gets the Lamp and unleashes his wrath on Tin Tin in the Congo and turns him into a wild pig. 

Not you sweetie. He then forces Gene to turn the castle into a fortress and float it back to his home in parts unknown. It’s a DAMN cool scene with impressive and horrifiing animation as the bin melts and crumbles into thte castle and the kids barely make it up the stares as they shift and disolve. Really top notch stuff.

Scrooge stands up to Merlock... and this naturally goes poorlyw ith Gene begging Merlock not to respond.. and Merlock having him blow scrooge off the top of the forgtess storm eagle style, though scrooge understands. And this is the true reason why scrooge being a dick didn’t bother me so much. Because it helps create a great contrast between him and Merlock. Both thought of Gene as a tool rather than a person.. but Scrooge grew to realize he was wrong and what he was dealing with wasn’t some magical goodies creator.. but a child forced to constantly grant wishes, in sheer agony to do so no less, likely so sick of it because again and again and again people used him as a slave to get what they wanted and to hell with what Gene wanted. He realized he was terrible for making this poor boy into his slave simply because that’s his job. In contrast Merlock could give no shits and is a malevolent monster who glefully uses Gene despite the pain the wishes put him through and his protests. It’s why Gene is the best part.. he’s  athroughly likeable, throughly inncoent character with tons of personality and a truly tragic and horrifying backstory and Rip Taylor acts the hell out of every scene with the guy. 

Thankfully the marbles come in handy one last time and Huey, Dewey or Louie snipes the lamp away and a struggle for it insues between Scrooge and Merloc mid air. it’s fucking awesome.. and it get sbetter in how scroogewins. He simply gets rid of Merlock’s amulet, taking it then throwing it. Grante dhe COULD’EVE used it for unimited wishes.. but it was too risky to do that and as we’ll see in the ending , Scrooge realized the Lamp was too powerful to keep around for much longer and too much of a tempting target for his rogues.. not that we see them this movie as the crew wanted it to bea ccesaible and thus kept hte cast to the main cast from season 1 and just made new vilians and a new supporting character, but still. 

He does use his second wish though to undue the damage Merlock had done and the bin and clan mcduck are returned to duckburg in good condition.

Time for our ending, which is genuinely and wholly touching. With the lamp too dangerous to use Scrooge considers just sending it to the earth’s core, which horrifies the kids as it’d mean Gene would be trapped there forever... if the molten lava iddn’t just outright destory the lamp and probably kill him. But Scrooge.. isn’t the bastard he likes to potray himself as. Instead he makes Gene into a real boy. He gives the poor kid HIS wish, which designrates the lamp and undoes all the spells... so Merlock is PROBABLY dead but he does return for some games so maybe not? 

And so we end on two things: Gene happily playing cops and robbers with the boys finally free.. and Birth of A Nation grabbing all the loot he can in his patns and running off. Ha ha ha thank god i’m done with this prick. And no I will not be looking at his ducktales episodes unless I have to. 

Final Thoughts:

This movie is OKAY. It has a solid plot, gene is a wonderful chacter, the animatoin is pretty prettay pretty good, and the voice acting as usual is excellent, with Rip Taylor being the standout. 

But as my paragraphs of rage shoud’ve made Clear Djonn is just BAD. Easily the worst character i’ve encountered in my year of reviewing and some of the worst writing i’ve ran into. And that writing includes a goblin man voyerstically forcing two teenagers to make out, making jokes about santa renaming himself Clem the sceneafter he tearfully confessed to letting the elves and ms. claus die, accidental transphobia via the u-men, and Bryan Lee O malley thinking we needed more than one volume of Julie Powers being around.  This was disgusting, even by 1990 standards and especially by 2021 standards and it drags the film down considerably. Without it the film is okay.. with it the film is just VERY hard to watch any time he pops up.  He made getting through the movie a nightmare and while I pause a lot becaue it’s a bad habbit I did so more simply because as I said earlier in the review I could not stand him. 

It makes it a hard film to recommend. If you can stomach the racisim, then it might be worth it, but be aware of what your putting up with going in. But if you can’t.. there’s no shame in that, it’s carbombya levels of bad. Which yes was a real fictoinal country. It was so bad Casey Casem quit transformers over it. True story. So yeah, it’s an okay film, on par with the series at it’s best for the most part.. but Djonn just spoils it for me. 

If you liked this review, like it, share it around that sort of thing and if you want MORE disney movie reviews, in addiiton to the goofy movie one later this month, if you help me hit my 25 dollar stretch goal on patroen.com/popculturebuffet, i’ll do reviews of the Recess, Proud Family and Kim Possible MOvies (Well so the drama anyway), so help me out would you and i’ll see you at the next rainbow.