#navigating hostility

[himmurf]

Can I get some comfort? I posted this to a local queer Facebook group to derision from an admin and a user. They act like I am a traitor to the community for even consider doing this for my safety in a private sector of my life...

For those people who need to hear it, there is nothing wrong with going back into the closet for your own safety. You aren't less queer because you can't be queer publicly. You aren't less trans because you have to act like you're not trans.

If you need to start going by your old pronouns or quietly go back into the closet to be safe - you are allowed to do that. Please do that if it means you're alive.

Your safety is important.

You are important.

And if you know someone who has to do this, don't push them. Don't out them. Follow their lead. People's safety is more important that grandstanding.

[sergle]

texas is hell oh god

[ghostzzy]

getting on HRT would likely improve or eliminate at least 3 of my debilitating health issues. and yet.

[ganymedesclock]

Any genre of game can have a disabled protagonist if you aren't a coward / willing to put the work in, but I'm currently batting around the concept of specifically point-and-click puzzle adventure games with a highly disabled protagonist.

Often, the pace of such games tends sedate and contemplative. Your character is seldom in a hurry; they are mostly faced by trying to figure out how to accomplish a particular task, and if a deadline is imposed, it's an extra thing to juggle.

This could be an interesting presumption to incorporate from a watsonian lens, through the viewpoint of a protagonist who may have limited mobility, pain and/or fatigue that make hurrying punitively inaccessible. It'd let the player familiarize themselves with early puzzles if the first thing they have to figure out how to do is say, get their player character out of bed in an environment where they don't have their usual fallbacks.

(also if this is also a walking adventure, it'd let you dodge accusations of the insurmountable waist-high fence- your intrepid hero MIGHT be able to climb over those bricks if they didn't have two bad hips and a walker to worry about!)

[gilfodile]

if i see this fandom get mischaracterized one more time

[obstinatecondolement]

Starting to crash really hard after burning the dirty fuel of hypomania and Making Myself Do It for the past few weeks with no mood stabilisers, no stimulants, not a lot of sleep (because hypomania and also because no PPI). Going to try to scale back so I don't tip into full burn out. Again.

[bogos-bint3d]

Messin around w/ perseverance stuff

[peachphernalia]

click for higher quality

do you ever see yourself ?

[alt ver. with different colors under the cut and ramble in tags]

[dream by joku]

[snugglesquiggle]

the juzi novice considers the possibility that nuzi works so much easier, so much more naturally on every level, and thinks this is an obstacle to shipping them, or worse, denies it.

the juzi adept understands this fact is double-edged, a key ingredient in the explosive chemistry, the faultline on which things can break

because it's not toxic yuri if no one gets hurt

[devilsskettle]

forgot how annoying it is to live in the college part of the city when all the students are back. it does settle down once the semester gets started but jesus

[captainsaku]

If your system makes me motion sick after turning off and tweaking all the camera settings I could find, it's a bad system.

[ace-and-ranty]

Just had a WEIRD social interaction with a man in my building's cleaning staff and I'm HONESTLY not sure if he's some flavor of autistic having trouble with a social rule or if he was being a creep.

[velvetjune]

One thing I hope control 2 does is lean even more into different mediums of art. The side missions for the jukebox or shum arcade machines are good for fighting practice and mods, but I wish they incorporated the altered item more, like how the ashtray maze replicates a specific aesthetic for a shifting hotel or all of langston’s runaways change their surroundings. Maybe make the arcade game all pixelated or add more music. Remedy has only gotten better and better with experimenting in their games, so I trust whatever they’ll come up with Control 2

[cultivating-wildflowers]

it’s too early but I’m gonna complain about staff real quick because I miss my friends’ avatars on desktop: purportedly this is to “save space” but we wouldn’t be needing to save horizontal space if they hadn’t moved all of the buttons to the left instead of leaving them at the top

[coweggomelet]

retail jobs are so fucking hostile to autistic people

like there's the obvious of all the sensory issues with the overhead music and the chatter of customers and the beeping of the registers and people's shoes and the crinkling and whatever other noises that the products themselves make when people pick them up and the lights and customers moving and whatever uniform you have to wear and sometimes multiple people are talking to you at once and you have to figure out how to listen to and understand both of them at the same time or everybody gets frustrated with you.

and everybody expects eye contact, most coworkers included, and i can't always do that so i have to either pretend to make eye contact, do very little of it, or do it none at all and for most of those it makes me seem weird.

and there's the masking, like even when i'm not fully masking because i'm already mentally exhausted i'm always doing it a little bit which takes a toll. and sometimes, because i've been masking less around my friends, i stop masking in public and all of a sudden forget how to Properly interact with other humans and start stammering or forget what i was saying or have no idea how to finish my train of thought and i seem weird.

and i have scripts i follow and programs my brain runs for how i interact with customers and coworkers in specific situations and those serve me really well but if i get interrupted in the middle of one, because customers often don't give a shit cause they don't see me as a person (which is a whole other thing with how so many customers view retail workers), my brain often short circuits and i get the forgetting how to interact Properly buff.

and how allistic people communicate is so wildly different to how autistic people in general communicate and they never consider different ways of doing that so we misunderstand each other constantly which always leads to them getting frustrated with me. or i get in trouble for doing something that no one ever told me i'm not supposed to do, they just assumed i'd know or instinctually figure it out.

and some of these things don't happen as often as it feels like they do, there's just so many things happening it feels like a lot cause it's so overwhelming. like the amount of times i almost have a meltdown at my retail job is insane. or i have to let them out in pieces so i have tiny outbursts i hide from coworkers and customers.

and then i have to be a functional person??? i have to go home and do chores? and go back to the retail job the next day without proper rest time? or go to my full time job for the next week where i'm required to be an Extra functional person? it's fucking exhausting

[divorce-enjoyer]

are you stupid?

I went to an exhibition on the history of migration and colonial rhetoric in Australia and it really helped me to pinpoint my exact issue with the way non-Australians (and. tbh. some aussies) talk about this country

this map is a piece of propaganda from 1921. honestly what shocked me about it was how little of Australia is marked out as “uninhabited”. I have seen maps shared around on this website that basically mark out the entirety of non-coastal Australia as “empty”. fucking colonialists from 1921 were more generous than some of you

the history of colonial Australia is a history of “taming the untameable land”. this has been reinforced through narratives that this country is:

inherently dangerous

uninhabitable

empty

this rhetoric survives in both the way Australia is imagined by non-Australians and in the self-image of Australia. the (white) aussie battler conquers the unconquerable. the outback is imagined as a post-apocalyptic hellscape. our fauna is categorised as uniquely hellish and unwieldy. so when non-Australians make joke after joke about how scared they are of this place. well you can imagine why it fills me with the kind of rage that can only be generated by the understanding that You Are Reinforcing Colonialism