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quicksilverownsmysoul · 4 years ago

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Can I please request headcanons of Peter (in witness protection because I'm in denial) getting to Westview and meeting reader who lives there? I'd love some smut but some good ol' fluff and angst are good too 🥰 happy 300 followers!

Thank you! I’m totally in denial too I’m like nitpicking the series now trying to find evidence that Ralph is Peter 😂 (he so totally is btw). Also last request from my 300 celebration!! I’ll post a Masterlist of them all soon!

Peter in Witness Protection

- The last thing Peter wanted to do was leave the mansion. But Xavier told him there was a threat to the X-Men and all current members needed to go into witness protection for their own safety.

- He watched as each of his friends got sent to a different realities for the time being. When it was his turn they sent him to a place called Westview. It was supposed to keep him safe.

- One little problem, the minute he stepped into Westview he forgot who he was

- It was like there was this force that made him follow this pre written script. His name was now Pietro and apparently he had a sister. At first he tried to fight the script but whatever the force was was too strong.

- So he gave in and followed along with the script, and after a while started to “enjoy” life in Westview. He loved his nephews and causing Wanda stress.

- There were times where he’d get a flicker of his old self but then it passed and he couldn’t remember it at all.

- One day was babysitting the twins when there was a knock on the door. He sped over to answer it and he felt his heart flutter. There was someone very pretty on the other side.

- You have him a smile and introduced yourself. You were a Mary Kay associate, you started to tell him about the products you offered and he nodded along mouth hanging open.

- About halfway through your speech realized he wasn’t paying attention.

- You pulled out a tube of lipstick and showed it to him with a bright smile. “And this lipstick is the exact same color as the blood of the man I killed yesterday.”

-“Uh-huh.” Peter muttered, smiling as he scanned you up and down

- You excused yourself to leave but Peter stopped you.

- “Wait I’ll buy whatever you’re selling!” Peter shouted out stopping you in your tracks. You turned to face him with a puzzled look.

- “You’ll buy some?”

- “Hell yeah. As soon as you tell me what it is you’re selling.”

- Your roll your eyes at him. “It’s makeup.”

-“oh.”

-“I’ll get going-“

- “No I’ll buy it.” Peter said. He leaned against the doorframe smirking at you. “You know I’m in a band.”

- “Is that so?” You responded a playful smile on your lips.

-“Mhmm, and I think your makeup would be just the things to make me look even more badass on stage.”

- You come in greeting the boys as Peter leads you over to the couch. You sit him down and start to take out your makeup. The twins come over to see what you are doing.

- You take out your eye shadow palette and apply it gently, explaining to him what color it is and how to apply it in the future.

- He asks you questions as your work, asking you why you’re selling make up, you tell him you took it as a side job to help pay for college.

- The entire time Peter’s heart is beating out of his chest and he’s pretty sure his whole face is red.

- You finish and pull back brushing his hair out of his eyes and tucking it behind his ear. He blushs at the action.

- You get the mirror out of your bag to show him. He loves it and is boasting about it to the twins. They tell him looks cool and beg for you to do their makeup too.

- You put matching eye shadow on the twins and they are overjoyed. Peter runs to get his Polaroid and takes a picture of the three of them. He also takes one with you in it, the boys insisted

- He’s pays for the makeup and you began to pack up to leave. The boys are tugging on his shirt and whispering to him. He pushes them away and they run off giggling.

- He turns to face you and asks you if maybe you’d like to go out sometime. You smile and agree, Peter walks you to the door.

- As he watches you as you leave a huge smile is still on his face. Maybe living in Westview isn’t so bad after all.

Kinda want to write a full fic about this

Taglist: @chiswritingandreadingcorner @enemy-of-wonkru @xxspqcebunsxx @coffeeandteaintheevening @kitwalkerangel @xmaximoffic @livingmybestfictionallife @evanmybeloved @kaismessiahbb @bugboy-and-icegirl

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olderthannetfic · 3 years ago

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Im the "spanish n word" anon sorry for calling it that 😭 i literally got harassed one time and told its as bad as the slur one and i didnt know how to say it hope you did have a good laugh at my expense though 😂

Lololol. Whomever said that was a fool.

Even in English, there are nuances. 'Negro' (in English) is dated, but it has been a preferred neutral term by some black people at some time. If someone asked me what UNCF's acronym stands for, I could tell them without feeling like I was violating some massive taboo, though like Wikipedia says, they've downplayed that part of their name in recent years. (However, going out of one's way to use this word as a white person is like those asshats who insist on using 'niggardly' because "tee hee, it isn't a slur, I'm allowed!" We all know they're just trying to be assholes.)

As a white person, I'm not going to say the one that ends in 'a', but I often hear people self-applying it, and the arguments over whether that's valid reclaiming or harming the community are none of my business.

The one that ends in 'r' makes me flinch.

When people say "the n word", they generally mean the last of those. That's the one that's a taboo, beyond-the-pale slur in English. The other two are more complex cases even if all of them derive from the same thing. Saying they're all exactly equivalent in English is nonsense even before we get to the stupidity of expecting Spanish to behave like English.

It sounds like the harassers were reaching. They wanted the moral high ground and went looking for something to nitpick.

There are only about ten billion debates about exactly how the -a version and the -er version differ, but here are some videos of people discussing it for The N-Word Project. Warning for... uh... a bunch of people talking about slurs, including some kkk assholes.

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todomitoukei · 4 years ago

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English vs. Japanese Shouto - A 298 Comparison

Welcome back to another comparison between the Japanese version and the official English translation. This chapter has caused a lot of confusion as soon as the spoilers came out, particularly in regards to the last line in Shouto’s monologue. Does he want to kill Dabi? Is he going to fight him?

Aside from the confusion, this chapter is important for both Shouto’s character, as well as his and Dabi’s storyline, moving forward.

The scene starts with a panel of Shouto in his hospital bed, surrounded by his classmates who by now are also aware of the situation. As we find out at the end of the chapter, Shouto’s throat is burned, so he currently can’t talk. Regardless, he has a lot to say or rather a lot to reflect on, starting with an obvious fact:

“His flames are stronger than dad’s.”

An obvious fact and a simple sentence. But what about the original?

「あいつの炎は親父よりも強かった。」

「あいつ ; aitsu 」-> he; that guy

「の ; no 」-> possessive particle; similar to an apostrophe

「炎 ; honou 」-> flame

「は ; ha 」-> topic marker particle

「親父 ; oyaji 」-> dad

「よりも ; yori mo 」-> in comparison to; more than

「強かった ; tsuyokatta 」-> was strong

= “His flames were stronger than dad’s.”

The difference here is the tense. While the original text has Shouto say that the flames “were” stronger, the English translation has him say they “are” stronger. It’s not really an important difference, but I think the past tense was him reflecting on the one fact he knew about Touya before all this. The first time we, the readers, heard about Touya in chapter 202 -

was during Shouto’s early training days, where Endeavor brought up Touya and the fact that “his fire was greater” - so this is a fact Shouto was raised with, someone he was essentially compared to. Touya set the bar high, but Endeavor expected Shouto to raise the bar even higher.

“I couldn’t win with firepower alone. So strong… Those flames full of hate.”

While Shouto had so far only been told about Touya’s strength, this is the first time he got to actually experience this himself. Now, Touya’s flames being stronger isn’t just something Endeavor said, but something Shouto knows.

「火力で勝てなかった強い。。。憎しみの炎だった。」

「火力 ; karyoku」-> firepower

「で ; de 」-> with

「勝てなかった ; katenakatta 」-> couldn’t win

「強い ; tsuyoi 」-> strong

「憎しみ ; nikushimi 」-> hatred

「の ; no 」-> possessive particle; similar to an apostrophe

「炎 ; honou 」-> flame

「だった ; datta 」-> was

= “I couldn’t win with firepower. Strong… it was a flame of strong hatred.”

Again, not a big difference, especially since the English translation made sure to split the text the same way as the original, but tsuyoi (strong) is an adjective that attaches to the noun, nikushimi (hatred). Sure, his flames are strong, but more importantly, his hatred is strong and that is the bigger problem here.

Not only does Dabi have a stronger flame, but his hatred grants him even more power as he’s not held back by any rational thought or feeling. Like a forest fire, you can’t just extinguish it. Instead, it keeps spreading and growing larger and larger.

“And he’s… been watching us all this time.”

Next, we get the flashback to the first time Shouto met Dabi back in the summer arc. Maybe Dabi’s “How sad, poor little Shouto Todoroki” didn’t mean that much to Shouto - who might have just assumed that Dabi knew his name from the sports festival - but now he understands that this had been planned for a long time. Touya “died” around ten years ago and during all that time, Dabi had been thinking about this moment.

「あいつはずっと見てたんだ。」

「あいつ ; aitsu 」-> he; that guy

「は ; ha 」-> topic marker particle

「ずっと ; zutto 」-> continuously; the whole time

「見てた ; miteta 」-> was watching

「んだ ; nda 」-> explanatory particle

= “He was watching the whole time.”

Again, not much of a difference except for the tense. Another thing that this is implying is that Dabi is incredibly patient. Instead of just being filled with rage and letting it out all, he waited in the shadows for years, even when being so close to Shouto he chose to keep his composure, even though he could’ve just killed him right then and there if he had wanted to.

Something that got lost in translation is the nuance of the nda at the end of the sentence, which can have multiple meanings. Here, it expresses reason and discovery, as Shouto understands his first encounter with Dabi now. Sort of like saying “Oh, so that’s why he knew my name. That’s what he has been up to the entire time.”

“All… to bring down dad. Wrecking his own body along the way… and not giving a damn whose lives get ruined in the process.”

「親父を貶めるためだけにその身を滅ぼしながらあらゆる人の人生を巻き込んで。」

「親父 ; oyaji 」-> dad

「を ; o 」-> direct object marker

「貶める ; otoshimeru 」-> to look down upon; to cause to fall

「ため ; tame 」-> purpose

「だけに ; dake ni 」-> being the case; precisely

「その ; sono 」-> that

「身 ; mi 」-> body; oneself

「を ; o 」-> direct object marker

「滅ぼしながら ; horoboshi nagara 」-> while destroying

「あらゆる人 ; ara yuru hito 」-> all kinds of people

「の ; no 」-> possessive particle; similar to an apostrophe

「人生 ; jinsei 」-> human life

「を ; o 」-> direct object marker

「巻き込んで ; makikonde 」-> involving; dragging into

= “For the purpose of causing dad’s downfall, he destroyed his body at the same time and dragged other lives into it.”

I find the additional “not giving a damn” in the official translation interesting (= I hate it)… since he literally doesn’t say that, but sure let’s just add this to make it seem like Shouto is judging Dabi here when he is not doing that at all. This is merely an observation, stating the fact that his older brother’s mind was so clouded by hatred that he involved other people’s lives in their family business. This isn’t to say that Shouto doesn’t see this as wrong, but it’s not the point and not something he is focusing on. He’s connecting the dots, making sense of the situation, and understanding the reasons that led to Dabi’s crimes rather than just stating the obvious of “this is wrong.”

On to one of my favorite lines this chapter: “He’s basically... me.”

「あいつは俺だ。」

「あいつ ; aitsu 」-> he; that guy

「は ; ha 」-> topic marker particle

「俺 ; ore 」-> I

「だ ; da 」-> be

= “That guy is me.”

So, I’m not sure why the “basically” was added in the official English translation since Shouto doesn’t say it like that. He just says “Touya = me.” It’s a fact. Obviously, Shouto isn’t actually Touya, but the “basically” isn’t needed unless you suddenly think that maybe Shouto hass two separate bodies at once somehow. This might be nitpicking, and there have definitely been bigger changes before, but to me the “basically” distances the two, even though the sentence is supposed to show that they are the same. Yes, one is on the hero side and the other on the villain side. Of course there are differences. But again, it’s not about the crimes Dabi has committed or how these two brothers differ. It’s about what’s going on in their minds, what feelings control their every action. They come from the same place, physically and mentally. The way they reacted to their pain is the same, with the big difference being what Shouto points out next:

“I was also burning with rage… up until that day.”

That day, as the panel shows, being the sports festival, the day Shouto began to see clearly. But Dabi didn’t have a moment like that (yet) and so he continues going down that path, while Shouto managed to leave that mindset.

「あの日までの俺がこの身を焼いたんだ。」

「あの ; ano 」-> that

「日 ; hi 」-> day

「まで ; made 」-> until

「の ; no 」-> nominalizes the preceding phrase

「俺 ; ore 」-> I

「が ; ga 」-> subject marker particle

「この ; kono 」-> this

「身 ; mi 」-> body; oneself

「を ; o 」-> direct object marker

「焼いた ; yaita 」-> was burning

「んだ ; nda 」-> explanatory particle

= “Until that day, I burned this body.”

As mentioned earlier, the nda is an explanatory particle. Here, it again expresses discovery. Shouto draws a conclusion here: Just like he used to burn his body, Dabi is still doing the same to his.

Again, his focus is not on Dabi, the villain, but Touya, his older brother, and someone just like Shouto. While other people might just see a mentally unstable criminal, Shouto sees how self-destructive Dabi is. And because Shouto hadn’t realized how clouded his mind was, he understands that Dabi most likely doesn’t quite realize this either. Dabi ignores his own pain, all in order to destroy Endeavor. A cry for help that others aren’t capable of comprehending.

“Dad can’t do it…”

「親父じゃやれねェ。。。」

「親父 ; oyaji 」-> dad

「じゃ ; jya 」-> casual particle

「やれねェ ; yarenee 」-> can’t do

= “Dad can’t do it.”

[EDIT because this part originally had a different explanation: As pointed out by this anon here, the jya in this case is a casual particle to mark the topic/subject, and the nee part is the casual form of nai, which negates the verb. The translation is the same but the explanation is different!]

And now, for the last line:

“I have to be the one… to handle… my brother Touya.”

Handle him…

「燈矢兄は俺がやらなきゃ。」

「燈矢 ; touya 」-> Touya

「兄 ; nii 」-> suffix for older brother

「は ; ha 」-> topic marker particle

「俺 ; ore 」-> I

「が ; ga 」-> subject marker particle

「やらなきゃ ; yaranakya 」-> must do it

= “I am the one that has to take care of Touya-Nii.”

So this is the line that caused confusion and panic, due to the yaranakya part. As you can see by the meaning of the word, similar to how “must do it” can have multiple meanings in English, the same logic applies to the Japanese word. It’s also important to note that the word here consists of the two parts yaru (to do) and nakya (must do). Nakya not only expresses that you have to do something, but, in this case, also shows determination. Shouto really has to do it and will do it. But do what exactly? Again, the problem with yaru is that its meaning depends on context, but sometimes context itself isn’t super helpful. One of the definitions of yaru is “to kill” and that might be what some people think it means here? But context tells us that this makes zero sense. Why show how much he understands his brother only to turn around and decide “well, I got help but he hasn’t so I’m just gonna have to kill him, I guess” - no.

More importantly, right before this line, he says “dad can’t do it” - what can’t he do? If we were talking about killing him, then why would Shouto be able to do it and not Endeavor? Of course, there are the... funny people who suggested that only Shouto can fight/kill his brother because unlike him, Endeavor has an emotional attachment to Dabi (I’m just not gonna comment on this). Anyway, to answer the question of what Endeavor can’t do but Shouto can, we have to look at what Shouto said before that, which is talking about him also having burned his body until the sports festival. This is the key moment where Shouto’s and Dabi’s similarities end and only because someone was reaching out to Shouto. So obviously, in order to have Dabi stop being self-destructive and fueled by hatred, someone needs to reach out to Dabi. And that’s the thing that Endeavor can’t do. After all, Endeavor is the root cause of this, which in turn brings this scene to a full circle since right before Shouto’s monologue began, we got this flashback to what Starservant said in chapter 244:

“That one is the root cause,” accompanied by a panel showing Endeavor.

For reference, here’s the Japanese counterpart:

「其奴こそが元凶じゃ！！」

「其奴 ; soyatsu 」-> that guy

「こそ ; koso 」-> for sure (emphasizes preceding word)

「が ; ga 」-> subject marker particle

「元凶 ; genkyou 」-> culprit; main source

「じゃ ; jya 」-> sentence ender often used for old people in fiction

= “That guy is definitely the main source!”

Shouto remembering this is just stating an obvious fact that he hadn’t fully understood before: Dabi’s existence is Endeavor’s fault. His actions drove Touya to become Dabi, someone whose sole purpose for existing is to destroy Endeavor. So Endeavor couldn’t possibly save him. No matter what Endeavor would say or do, it would be meaningless. But Shouto is different because Shouto was Dabi. The big obstacle Shouto has to figure out how to overcome is making his big brother understand this, too. Regardless, Shouto is the only one that can reach out to him and the only one that fully understands him.

Another important to point out with this line, and many others have already talked about this, is that Shouto now refers to Dabi as Touya-Nii, whereas on the battlefield a few days prior, Shouto only called him Touya, without the “nii”. He is now actively acknowledging that this is, in fact, his big brother. He isn’t Dabi, the villain. And he isn’t just Touya, either - some abstract idea; someone Shouto has heard of but never met or talked to (not confirmed, but likely). This is now his big bro, just like Natsuo is, and just like Fuyumi is his big sister. They’re family.

Overall, this chapter was actually pretty accurate in terms of translation; though granted, Shouto isn’t a villain so the bias isn’t there… but anyway, this marks a very important turning point in the story and gives us a rough idea of what’s in store for Shouto from here on out.

He recognizes where Dabi is coming from. He doesn’t just see him as a villain, but rather someone who has been so full of hatred - for good reasons - that he ended up dragging innocent people into this. The focus, though, is entirely on that one fact: “That guy is me.”

Shouto understands that he could have turned out the same way, he understands hurting his own body just to spite his father.

The key concern with this chapter was that Shouto said that he’s going to kill Touya. I have no idea who started this rumor, but as mentioned, there is a possible confusion regarding yaru, which has multiple meanings. But although he doesn’t explicitly say “I will save him” it’s obvious from everything else he says during this chapter. If he recognizes that they’re the same, his conclusion won’t be “I have to kill him.” Especially when taking into consideration the fact that Shouto also pointed out that he couldn’t win against Dabi with his fire. And no, that doesn’t mean he can beat him with his ice or that that’s what he intends on doing. It’s not clear what he will be doing exactly, but that is partially due to the fact that Shouto is currently not in a state where he could possibly figure out the answer, either.

But he has a goal: saving Touya-Nii - not so much from Endeavor, but from Dabi.

Next week’s chapter will hopefully focus on the Todofam conversation about to take place and will maybe give us some more hints as to what to expect. So far, though, it’s very obvious that Shouto will try to reach out to Dabi and save him, much like he was also saved from his hatred during the sports festival. He might not have a relationship with Touya the way he has started to build one with Natsuo and Fuyumi, but they have a much deeper connection because they are the same person.

#298 #translation #shouto #dabi #todoroki #touya #bnha #meta

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bimbinis · 10 months ago

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I remember seeing this post circulating about a year ago or so and I'm surprised it's making the rounds again because back then I smelled bullshit and when I checked the notes I saw multiple people pointing out the exact kind of bullshit it was. the irony is that in order to substantially disagree with the article you have to be the kind of person who bothers reading articles people link on tumblr. if you do so while also applying some scrutiny you'll notice that it's pure and simple boomer circlejerking. the majority of it is Hari giving a negative Yelp review on his own vacation experience interspersed with paragraphs of him (allegedly, we'll get to that) citing scientists and academics that seem like they are echoing the same sentiment but are really just saying unrelated things. To start with the quote highlighted

as someone else already said in the replies, it's already concerning from the get go to operate under the assumption of the existence of a "normal brain" as a thing that means anything, but the concentration time estimates are also meaningless without anything to compare to from before whatever it is that Hari is estimating to be the "point of collapse". You can't draw an unfavorable comparison without having anything to compare to!

but beyond that, this one paragraph is the one time one his quotes actually constructs the problem as some type of measurable change to the brain (and even then the actual numbers he presented don't even show any kind of change at all because we have nothing to compare them to). every following expert he's supposedly quoting is simply discussing how concentration works and what might get in the way of it. one of them argues that multitasking isn't actually real and that what we're actually doing is changing focus really fast, which makes our performance at all tasks we're trying to perform in the moment that require concentration suffer.

but it cannot be extrapolated from these quotes that this is a long lasting change to the brain itself. the tests that are mentioned in this section are measuring attention applied to a single current task.

the following scientist is just describing how focusing works.

for the rest of the article he just talks about how the evidence seems to point towards the factors making it harder to concentrate being systemic conditions: workers are not being allowed to fully disconnect from work because we're accessible at all time from our phones, we undersleep, are constantly stressed, etc. and that all negatively affects capacity for concentration. this is all pretty uncontroversial, however its clear that the entire thesis of this article is hinging on the idea presented early on that this is a problem that profoundly altered your brain in a measurable, physiological way, which once again, has not been meaningfully substantiated!

this may seem like a nitpick because a lot of the rest of what's said (how attention span works, how it's bad that our bosses increasingly encroach on our free time, that we're stressed and tired and need a fucking break etc etc) is pretty uncontroversial and agreeable. dare I say, to the point that it doesn't even need to be said, perhaps.

which is where the problem lies to me. if it's an article that just says "you can't afford to focus on things that would take more work and be more fulfilling to you because the way the world is structured demands your constant attention for bullshit you don't care about" that would probably be more of a manifesto (probably one much more explicit about the names of the systems that cause this state of affairs, too, like the one about literacy going around a few days ago) and much less of a "scientific" article that also gets to promote your shitty book. it would have much less of the sense of urgency Hari is trying to invoke by gesturing in the direction of the brain thing because for some reason people are much more easily alarmed by the idea their brain is secretly being tampered with than the idea that their lives already suck and they can already tell, and we should do something about it, despite the fact that the article depends on you basically already believing all this in order to agree with it and not scrutinize it very deeply. that fabricated sense of urgency is what enables him to go

and this should ring like 1000 alarm bells to everyone because any time anyone writing a "science article" goes "some scientists say this, others say that, who's to say what's true or not? (but here's why you should definitely treat this side as the right one)" without elaborating on what really is the disparity between these two sides that are seemingly on equal footing, its probably because they're trying to deceive you. in fact the particular invocation of alarm to justify "acting without perfect evidence" reminds me of how the MMR vaccine scare was constructed in the same way (luckily Hari is just trying to sell you his shitty book and his proposed solutions are also quite benign, hopefully it doesn't segue into him asking for needless invasive procedures to be performed on children just to prove his theory or anything).

and keep in mind who it is that is trying to sell you said book bc this is what his wikipedia page looks like

and if you go in that last section here's what it says about the book in question

which is what I meant when I said he allegedly quotes the academics he mentions.

it's clear that this article continues to get spread around despite the fact that it doesn't say anything of substance because people already believe what's in it. it's probably not a very big deal, as I said the article is mostly not even wrong, just kinda trash, but there is something supremely ironic about people reinforcing their preexisting beliefs about shrinking attention spans by using an article they must not have read or paid much close attention to cuz if they did they probably would have been turned off by the sheer amount of privileged whining that his expensive vacation was ruined bc his godson watches too much porn

Your attention didn’t collapse. It was stolen by Johann Hari

#comment provided #in general i'm very wary of articles that seem to just be like #that thing you already believe ideologically? well we proved you're right about it with science!#and i mean this truly in the sense of things *I* believe. I'm very suspicious of things that just seem to be echoing my feelings back to me #in a way as to make me feel I'm objectively right and have been right all along and have to question nothing surrounding it #so the reason I quirked my eyebrow at this article was *because* it was so easy to agree with #also I'd be remiss to not mention the comparisons to the ''obesity epidemic''#which i'm mildly sure is a scam in the first place but not certain enough that i'll add that as a point in the main post #also can we kill the terf in this chain with hammers? why'd you people let her live this long

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sevenkittensinatrenchcoat · 4 years ago

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Flaws of Cats 1998

Cats 1998 is my favorite version of the show and it’s basically designed to be the most watchable version, so it tends to be the favorite of many. But, like every production, it’s not perfect, so I’ve decided to gather a list of imperfections. Some of these are objective problems with how something was done, while others are nitpicks or entirely about personal preference.

I’ll start of with the disclaimer that I love this version, I love the cast, and I don’t think anyone did a downright bad job. Most of the Bad Stuff is less Bad and more Could Be Better.

Anyway...

The continuity editing is comically bad. *Insert teleporting Pouncival comment here*

1998 Tumblebrutus is, and I’m sorry to say this, underwhelming. He’s not bad, and Broadway-based productions give the character more to do than London-based productions like this one, leaving him at a disadvantage, but compared to Pouncival, Plato, and even George, he often feels like “the other boy”. Out of the trio of Plato, Pouncival, and Tumblebrutus, both Bryn Walters and Karl Morgan had played their roles before, while Fergus Logan had not and you can tell. He didn’t seem comfortable with the role. His voice in Jellicle Songs is much deeper than it is later on, so he was experimenting with how the character’s voice should sound between these scenes, meaning that he was probably still figuring the character out throughout filming. It’s an opening night performance, rehearsed but not quite perfected yet, and there was really no time to fix that.

That said, Fergus nails the physical part of the role. He can tumble like a Tumblebrutus should and his ballet during the Jellicle Ball is just as good as Jacob Brent’s is. According to Jacob, Fergus actually had the timing right for the dance while he was slightly off. Fergus is generally at his best here when he’s doing something he would’ve been doing as Mistoffelees on stage.

Disclaimer: Fergus Logan was not the only actor playing a character he’d never played before and these sorts of problems could apply to anyone in this situation, but this is the example I found to be the most noticeable.

Speaking of Tumblebrutus at the Jellicle Ball, the decision to give Tumblebrutus Pouncival’s track during the ball was a bit inconsistent. During the Boys Jump segment, Pouncival has his usual track, though it’s a Broadway-based version of the track. In London-based productions, Mistoffelees and Carbucketty/Pouncival usually have opposite roles in this part. Tumblebrutus comes out in what I usually see as Mungojerrie’s entrance. Then the tom kittens sort of switch out for the Boys Ballet. Having Tumblebrutus as Pouncival during the Cartwheels actually removed Tumblebrutus’ usual track in that segment. They should’ve either had Pouncival do his usual thing here, swapped the tracks completely, or had someone else, possibly Mungojerrie, cover Tumble’s track.

Exotica. They at least could’ve kept her in the ensemble consistently. Or kept a consistent character design. Or given her a better name.

Macavity’s design is too monstrous. It’s established that multiple queens, despite hating him, are attracted to him, so he should have at least a few qualities that the audience could see as attractive, in order for this to make sense. But he’s a big furball who lacks the more human face that the other cats have. He looks and acts like the monster that he is, so Demeter and Bomba’s thing for him, and him being described as “outwardly respectable” don’t quite make sense. He’s supposed to be unkempt and somewhat feral-looking, but they went too far with it.

Lastly, this is not a flaw as much as a personal preference for something other productions have done, but this one didn’t. When it comes to the Mr. Mistoffelees number, there’s a specific version of their dynamic that best highlights Misto’s character development. Throughout the number, though Misto is the center of attention, Tugger is the instigator. When things aren’t quite working, Misto turns to him. Tugger narrates everything.

Towards the end of the number, as Misto gets to work bringing back Old Deuteronomy, he directs a few other cats on how to help him, but he never directs Tugger. He interacts with Tugger as if he’s the one in control here. This is why Tugger can’t be his assistant in the trick. But, after bringing Old Deuteronomy back, Misto has confidence and has truly come of age.

In some productions, this is when he realizes that this is his musical number and he can decide how it goes, so he whispers to Tugger how he wants the number to end. The words Tugger says at the end of the song are at least partially Misto’s suggestion. He has enough confidence and authority to take charge of the number and Tugger does what he asks. He probably would’ve done that before, but Misto lacked the sense of confidence to try.

If you want to see a good example of this, look at the German Tent Tour.

The 1998 production has Tugger come up with the finale by himself, so the sense that Misto has come into his own as an adult isn’t quite as strong as it could be.

Also, they could’ve not removed every bit of choreography where Tugger and Misto touch. That was a bit lame of them.

#cats 1998 #criticizing the things you love #tumblebrutus #teleporting pouncival #jellicle ball #macavity #mr mistoffelees #cats german tent tour

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heartslogos · 4 years ago

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the executive assistant to the batman [62]

“Don’t talk to me. Don’t look at me. Don’t even consider acting like I exist in the same room as you,” Tam says. “Of all the times for you to — seriously! Right before the big restructure of our west coast branch and redistribution of our logistics pipeline across the states?”

“Tam. I know you must be feeling very negatively right now. But it’s for the greater good. If I took real sick leave then the entire thing really will be fucked over. At least this way I have some sort of…sense of control about it. I’m not actually leaving. I’m still around. Sort of. But this way I won’t have to turn the front half of Wayne’s office into sick room. How unprofessional is that, Tam? I’ve worked too hard for this. Years of my life dedicated to turning my job into something people actually pay attention to.”

“Greater good my ass,” Tam glares at him. “Who gave you permission to get a collapsed lung? Work from home? You? Work from home? What about the rest of us who have to work here while you’re not physically present? You think we can stop the Waynes if they’re about to do something stupid? If you’re work from home they’ll act like normal. You should’ve just taken sick leave. If it’s sick leave then they’ll attempt to behave until you come back out of guilt or something.”

“Shouldn’t you be nicer to me?” Tim scowls. “I’m the one who has a collapsed lung and pneumonia.”

“Speaking of, how did you get both of those? Does the universe hate you that much? Who did you piss off? Aside from me and the rest of this company?”

“It’s not like I’m asking for it to happen! I’m not happy about this either. I’m the one who’s getting my home invaded by my job. At least you get to go home and put your phone on silent and pretend like you have a life outside of work. I’m being forced to bring my work home with me for a few weeks.” Tim directs his glare at the several boxes that some poor interns are currently packing up to be transported to his apartment.

Tim had to fight to be present for this. Thankfully someone had seen reason about the fact that Tim can’t work from home if he doesn’t have the proper materials.

It didn’t stop any of the extended Wayne family from fluttering in and out of the room like anxious bats and birds.

The only reason they’re not here right now is because Tim said he was hungry as loudly as possible, sending the assorted family members scattering to every region of Gotham to procure their own versions of what a sick and convalescing person should be eating.

Tim expects to be laden down too much take out for one person to reasonably consume in a week. He might even have a grocery delivery waiting for him at his apartment right now.

He shifts uncomfortably on the sofa, headache slowly creeping up at his temples and carving out a space for itself behind his eyes.

Tam’s expression softens, just a little. “You need to take better care of yourself before that family decides that they’ll do it for you. I don’t think you could survive the Wayne brand of tender loving care, Tim.”

“Let’s never find out,” Tim replies. “I am sorry, though. You know that, right? It shouldn’t roll down to you whenever I’m out but — well. You’re capable.”

Tam shakes her head, running a hand through her hair as she rolls her eyes towards the ceiling.

“The curses of being capable in Gotham. Suddenly everything’s your problem. How come these things never get down to Li?”

“Because Li would collapse the economy if anyone tried to make her take on more than she wants to.”

Tam rolls her eyes.

“Tam, I’m being serious.” Tim’s eyes flick towards the door. As though saying Li’s name could summon her from the austere and perfectly coordinated circus of a department she runs. Like the devil but also Clippy or an extremely judgmental Alexa.

“No, I know you are,” Tam says, “But it’s funny how you think she’d stop at collapsing the economy. Li could probably cripple governments through sheer force of disdain if she wanted to. Let’s never give her a reason or a chance to try. I don’t know where you find these people, Tim. I really don’t. Mandy’s shaping up to be a terror. I’m still trying to get her to consider applying for management positions.”

“Agreed. Mandy’s still in school though, isn’t she?”

“Didn’t stop you from shooting yourself to the top of the corporate ladder at the tender age of — what was it, sixteen?” Tam checks her phone. “Just got a text from MeiMei. She was on the second floor of the lobby and she saw one of your Wayne’s coming back with an entire armful of take out containers.”

“Was MeiMei kind enough to say which Wayne?”

“Nope. Says that their face was covered by the stack of take out and tall with black hair doesn’t rule anybody out. Especially after Damian’s growth spurt. Is that kid ever going to stop? You’ve had that kid re-fitted for suits five times this year.”

“Tell that to Damian.” Tim slowly pushes to his feet. “Alright. I think that’s everything I’ll need. Let’s get this loaded for transport. I do not want to be here with every single take out option in Gotham.”

Tim can picture it now. They’d probably try to make him pick one to eat then and there. God. And they’d probably consider it as some kind of strange contest to see which one of them he likes best. They’d hold it against him and sulk for weeks.

“I need to find a different job,” Tim groans as he and Tam quickly head towards the elevators, interns at their heels with dollies and carts loaded with banker’s boxes of documents and equipment. “Or I need to find some sucker to throw at them so they can get attached to and fight over them instead of me. Half the work of this job is appeasement.”

“The curse of being capable,” Tam repeats, “Should’ve played stupid like the rest of us. Too late now. You could fake having aphasia and they’d still go to you for everything.” Tam pauses. “Don’t try to fake an aphasia. They’d turn over the entire medical research department and create a whole new set of gone-bad doctors with with some sort of weird language theme. The Riddler might shit himself over the sudden brand incursion.”

“I don’t think the Riddler is that kind of doctor.”

“Oh, yeah, Tim? That’s the detail you want to nitpick? What kind of doctorate the Riddler may or may not have?”

#heartsfic #c: the dreamer who always sees the stars

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elsi-bee · 3 years ago

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2021 Annual Writing Self-Evaluation

Thank you for tagging me @absoloutenonsense ! So happy to have gotten back into writing this year after some time off. :)

1. Number of stories posted to AO3: 2

2. Word count posted for the year: 65,634

3. Fandoms I wrote for: One Direction

4. Pairings: Harry/Louis

5. Story with the most Kudos/Comments/Bookmarks: It’s Been So Long

6. Work I’m most proud of (and why): I’m proud of both of the fics I wrote this year!

I’m proud of It’s Been So Long because it’s the first fic I’ve published since 2017. I took an extended break from writing after having a baby. I didn’t realize how hard it would be to carve out time for myself as a mom to eat... shower... meet basic daily needs... much less write! So writing took a back burner for a long time while I worked to figure that out (I still don’t have it fully figured out 😉). I had started writing It’s Been So Long way back in 2017/18, so actually finishing it and getting it posted was huge.

I was inspired to join the @1dchristmasfest in late November after seeing their open prompts, and can’t believe I managed to write 34k in a month! I don’t think I’d want to write at that capacity on the regular (it’s all I did every evening and toddler weekend nap time for a solid few weeks), but I had set an unspoken goal for myself to write two fics this year and I actually managed to do it! My Christmas fic Give It To Someone Special allowed me to practice writing without stopping in order to get the first draft done, instead of nitpicking every little thing I’d written previously over and over. And I’m proud of the end result!

7. Work I’m least proud of (and why): Definitely doesn’t apply. These days, I’m proud of anything I manage to get done!

8. Share or describe a favorite review you received: I was so touched after posting It’s Been So Long to receive comments from people who remembered me from my earlier works and were happy to see that I had returned to writing. Thank you @honestlytrulycompletelysteady, @allwaswell16, and @lululawrence to name a few <3

9. A time when writing was really, really hard: I had a different idea for a Christmas fic that I had started working on late summer/early fall that just wasn’t coming together. I also returned to work in-person full time in August after having some work-from-home flexibility since COVID had started, so adding an hour of commuting back into my day really cut into having extra time. And... my toddler was sick for 3 weeks as all of this transition was happening. 🥴 I had basically resigned myself to not writing a second fic this year until I was inspired by one of the Christmas fest prompts.

10. A scene or character you wrote that surprised you: (Tiny spoiler alert) but I didn’t set out to write a fic that involved cheating as Give It To Someone Special was coming together... oops! I had a very basic plot outline when I started to quickly write it and as I went the story just moved that way seemingly out of my control! I’m happy with the way it ended up though, even if that is a topic I would generally tend to avoid.

11. A favorite excerpt of your writing: From Give It To Someone Special. Harry and Louis share a tense dance at the wrap party for their film.

“Louis,” Harry said again. “Just please stop talking.”

“Okay, okay,” Louis said, trying not to take offense. He thought about commenting that it was virtually impossible for him to do so, but it was evident that any attempts at sarcasm were not going to pull Harry out of tonight’s funk.

So, he stopped talking. He focused on the weight of Harry’s arms on his shoulders, the way Harry’s clasped hands brushed against his neck as they moved back and forth. He focused on how their bodies swayed in step without any forethought or planning necessary.

He focused on the song blasting through the sound system.

He tried not to focus on all the things he wanted to say. On how if he started talking again, he might not stop. He had so many questions he wanted to spew at Harry in rapid succession, so many unknowns he felt desperate to clear up. Not knowing what Harry was thinking had evoked a constant thrum of worry in his mind.

But Louis had agreed to stay silent, so he did. He touched Harry’s waist, the small of his back, their sway slowing to a still as the song continued on. He tried not to wonder if this would be his last moment of having Harry in this way. He tried not to dwell on the fear that he wouldn’t even have the chance to put his thoughts out into the open. That this dance, this party would come to its inevitable end, along with his chance to become something more than Harry’s former co-star.

Louis didn’t speak, because he’d said he wouldn’t, but his mind was practically screaming.

12. How did you grow as a writer this year: I wrote. I carved out time to sit down and put words into a doc. I got better at writing during any free moments, instead of waiting to have a few hours in a row I could dedicate to uninterrupted writing like I had in the past. I wrote and kept writing until I had a shitty first draft, and realized it wasn’t so shitty after all as I molded it into what landed on AO3. I’m super proud of myself for getting back into it. :)

13. How do you hope to grow next year: I want to continue to give myself grace - not just in writing, in life in general. I might publish a fic or two this year. I might not. And I know either outcome will be okay.

14. Who was your greatest positive influence this year as a writer (could be another writer or beta or cheerleader or muse etc etc): So grateful to pick back up with @camiii this year and for her cheerleading and beta work. Working with @mindpalace-ellcrys during the Big Bang was a wonderful experience, and I encourage you to scroll right past my wordiness in It’s Been So Long just to sneak a peek at her incredible digital art! ;) Also grateful to @artsymisfitlover for beta reading my Christmas fic on such short notice. Writing takes a village, and I’m so glad for the help I’ve received!

15. Anything from your real life show up in your writing this year: HAHA, yes! In a last minute addition to Give It To Someone Special, I added that Louis’ stepdad has a front yard full of Christmas lawn inflatables. That’s a shoutout to my husband (not that he knows/will ever read this), but he has become OBSESSED with Christmas inflatables over the past couple of years and our suburban display is quite a sight. 🤣

And just a minor detail but It’s Been So Long takes place near where I live. 😊

16. Any new wisdom you can share with other writers: Write for yourself. Write what you want to write instead of what you think people want to read. I am so much more satisfied writing works I truly like and am proud of instead of writing something that I think could be a big fic and then being disappointed by the result. ❤️

Also! This year I started reading my works out loud to myself during my final stage of editing. I find that reading it aloud helps me catch little words I’ve missed or realize when wording is confusing so much better than if I’m just skimming it over. Going to keep doing this moving forward for sure.

17. Any projects you’re looking forward to starting (or finishing) in the new year: I have two ideas in mind. Just completely realistically when I think about what 2022 could have in store for me, I’m not sure I’ll publish anything at all. But, never say never!

I had an epiphany for how I could rework the Christmas fic I abandoned a few months ago, so I might return to that.

I also have had an idea for a fic that involves a somewhat unconventional sport for YEARS. It would need some research, and I don’t have a story fully fleshed out yet, but the fact that it’s still circulating in my brain tells me I need to get it down some day.

18. Tag some writers whose answers you’d like to read: I would love to hear from @camiii @juliusschmidt and @artsymisfitlover if you would like to play along!

#annual writing self evaluation #this was fun!!

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bilbobagginsomebabez · 2 years ago

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not arguing with the post; it's correct. been trying to figure out what bothered me about it though and it's the "super fucking mad about queer acknowledged as slur" thing. because 'queer is a slur' discourse is FUCKED--that's what happens when it's started by bad faith actors (terfs). you have a lot of people yelling that queer isn't a slur because terfs popularized the idea that queer is a Special Slur that can't be used anywhere and everyone needs to be very careful about because it might Hurt Another Gay To Hear It, that queer needs to be tagged and isolated and warned about and Rarely Used. and we all know they did that because queer is the most broad and inclusive of our terms. we also all know it's bullshit because every single one of our words started as a slur.

but that nugget--that you have to be really careful about any community terms because of other peoples' individual trauma and the possibility they could have bad experiences about it--it got spread around. and now you have queers thinking that you can only freely use community terms that don't have a history of pain or oppression. which is LGBT. which can easily have the T cut off. which is what the terfs wanted.

and because all this started by trying to kill the community's use of queer, you STILL have the same LARGE group of people who are sick to DEATH of their ID getting isolated as The Bad Label You Can't Say whose hackles raise right away when you try to point at queer as a slur. and honestly! what the fuck else can we expect! for years it's been "queer is a slur don't refer to anybody as queer unless you have permission first." DUH we're all fuckin skittish. i specifically use queer because of its radical roots, i AM queer as in fuck you. and if someone starts a conversation with me about "queer is a slur" bullshit, i'm generally more ready to bite them than listen.

and like. a nitpick. queer HAS been reclaimed. seriously. the academic field for studying The Gays is "queer studies." we aren't still in the process of reclaiming queer, we're already done. we've been done for like 40 years. the idea that queer is a specifically Bad slur or needs to be specifically Recognized as a slur is ahistorical and about 10 years old. Queer Is A Slur is new (and fucking stupid) because everybody KNOWS queer is a slur! ALL OF OUR IDENTITY LABELS ARE SLURS. some of them are diagnostic terms that used to get people thrown in the sanitarium! so NO it is not about assimilation, it's not about wanting queer sold back to me on a t-shirt, it's terf bullshit we're all stuck dealing with! and it sucks!

anyway, the majority of people on THIS site are statistically likely have FAR more direct trauma over the word "gay" considering it was the insult du jour from 1995-2010 and queer hasn't been widely used since the fucking 70s when we started marching with "QUEER AS IN FUCK YOU" signs and used it as the name of our academic discipline to study ourselves which we named for ourselves.

and now I've figured it out. this post is assuming that intra-community arguments are supposed to be applied universally. "q slur" is a fucking insult to us, acting like our identity that we reclaimed 40 fucking years ago needs a Disclaimer to Protect Other Gays. like we ourselves are too radical for our own fucking community because the queers are too scary and they use a mean word. gonna go through and block every motherfucker on this post that tagged it q slur

christ i'm actually seeing people insist that dyke is not a slur now as if that's a necessary justification for wlw to be able to say it? why are people so fucking terrified of what reclamation actually means? the point isn't to make a weapon used against you so meaningless that target feels safe to sell it back to you on a shirt, it is transgressive and shocking to say "so what if i am that? i am the words that have been the last thing people have fucking heard before being bashed". don't insert yourself into a words history and then deny its weaponization, WIELD IT against your oppressors!!

#hate this shit.

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billcpher111fics · 4 years ago

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I̴̤̫̿̕ņ̵̺͔̱̮̈́̈́̋ş̸̠̠͍̈́̽̒̕͝e̷̔͌́͜c̷̫̗͚͛u̷̧̨̺͇̞̍̋͠r̵̫͑ì̷̡̳͔̓͜t̶̛̬͎̔̎y̵̹̬̥̒̍̃ ch1

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Fully detailed version on Ao3

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Roman wasn't doing too well after the most recent episode. He had locked himself in his room for the last several days and had been pushing himself to the edge with pumping out new content for Thomas. He didn't eat, he barely slept and he refused to talk to anyone or take a break. He couldn't help but heavily nitpick his work. If the idea wasn't perfect, then it was scrapped altogether. He was horribly stressed and couldn't stop the cascade of horrible thoughts bouncing around his mind.

It's not good enough...

You could do better...

It's not original...

Thomas deserves better...

R̸͙͂̊e̵̥͛́m̴̗̕ủ̷̼̙̚s̷̯͚͂̓could do better than you...

They'll never forgive you...

It was all your fault...

You're the one who decided to make fun of his name...

He had every right to defend himself...

The more he listened to these thoughts, the worse they got. Throwing around his worst thoughts and feelings back at him. The worst part? He knew that they weren't wrong. He was the one who messed everything up. He was the one who chose his actions. Those were his mistakes. He only hoped that if he worked hard enough and pumped out enough good content, that would at least give him the opportunity to try and make things right.

That will never work...

All he needed to do was work a little harder. It was the very least he could do after being such a pain for the other sides to deal with.

They're probably happy that you never leave your room anymore...

He would be able to apologize to J-... Deceit. For his actions and making him out to be the villain...

You have no right to say his name after what you did...

He would apologize to Patton for putting too much pressure on him.

You expected too much from him. Driving him to his limits. I wouldn't be surprised that he would have finally lost his patients to deal with you...

He would apologize to Logan for always being so uncooperative with him.

All you do is bother him with your nonsense and ignore him whenever he isn't relevant to your own selfish wants. How horrible does that make you? He does his best for Thomas and all you do is mess things up? How can you look him in the eyes after treating him so horribly?...

And he would apologize to Virgil. For... Everything. And he wouldn't expect him to forgive him.

You don't deserve forgiveness...

He didn't deserve Virgil forgiveness... Or anyones. But he had treated Virgil the worst, by far.

From the beginning, you gave Virgil nothing but a hard time. You made him into the bad guy for you to fight against to make yourself feel better. You're pathetic. He had never done anything wrong to you but you insisted on bullying and degrading him. Your probably the reason he ducked out. If not, at least a big reason why. All Virgil has ever done was try and keep Thomas safe. But you just had to put your own selfish desires above his. Didn't you?...

Then he would apologize to Thomas. He deserves so much more than...

A pathetic and self-centered Creativity who couldn't- Wouldnt stop thinking about himself for five seconds to see how much he was hurting thous around him? A Mistake? Someone not deserving of the title Hero?...

Him...

He also needed to apologize to... To...

You can even say it. How pathetic. After everything you've done to make everyone else the bad guy but your self, you still can't even say his name and admit you were wrong. You're always wrong. When have you never not been wrong!?

You were wrong about Virgil...

You were Wrong about Janus...

You were wrong about the wedding...

You were wrong about everything...

They're probably mad at you...

I wouldn't doubt it...

Your the one who had messed up...

You don't deserve them...

You don't deserve to be here...

They would all be happy if you ducked out...

Janus was right...

You're the evil twin...

All Remus has ever done was to do his job as intrusive thoughts...

Your the one who had hurt the ones you had 'cared' about...

Your no hero...

You don't deserve to be a hero...

Your not Thomas' hero.

Roman gasped and grabbed at his chest in pain. It hurt. Almost as if someone was stabbing him in the chest. He looked down to see that there was a small dark patch that was barely covered by his sash. It almost looked like a splatter of ink, staining his previously white and pristine princely outfit.

You don't deserve the title of 'Prince'...

Roman gasped in pain, not noticing that the spot had grown slightly at the hurtful comment that plagued his mind.

Then he had felt a slight pulling sensation. He was being summoned. By Thomas. Dammit!

Roman quickly ran over to his mirror, looking himself. He looked horrible. His hair was a mess, his eyes had dreadful bags underneath them, his clothes were terribly wrinkled. He was a mess. In a rush, he tidied his hair and quickly applied some concealer then with a snap he removed the wrinkles from his clothes. Another look in the mirror had him frowning. His hair still looked like a mess.

They were going to notice...

The concealer was sloppy at best.

They were going to know how tired he was...

His suit was looking... Better... But the black 'ink' blotch was still there and nearly visible from behind his sash. He could do better.

He felt another tug.

He didn't have time. He rushed to grab a stack of papers filled with his approved ideas and quickly sunk out.

"Greetings, plebeians!" Roman greeted, posing in his typical manner.

God. Could you go one day without acting like a pompous prick?...

He flinched slightly at the pain but dug his nails into his fists as to not react.

"Roman," Logan began, "It had taken Thomas calling you more than once for you to arrive. What were you doing?" He questioned. He didn't look mad, but he wasn't the one for flaunting his emotions.

He's mad at you...

You know how important punctuality is to him...

Roman forced a smile threw the pain. "My apologies, Dear nerd!"

You cant go 5-second without making fun of someone, can you?...

How pathetic...

"I was just a bit... Fashionably late! Tis all!" Out of the corner of his eye, he could see Janus staring at him. He felt dread pull into his stomach.

Logan hesitantly nodded, appearing to take that as an answer. "Alright, let's get back onto the current topic." Logan excepted that far too easily. Usually, he would ask for more detail or lecture Roman on showing up on time but he had just... Excepted his answer?

He didn't want to waste any more time on you than he already hast to...

You really do get in the way...

"As for the current issue...Patton? Do you mind addressing it? You're more suited to deal with more... Emotionally based issues?" He asked awkwardly. Clearly uncomfortable with the current topic that Roman was still in the dark on.

"Oh!" Patton started. "Well, Roman? We've been talking lately...and well..." He paused, trying to work out his sentence. Romans' stomach was in knots and his heartbeat raised.

They don't like you...

They're going to make you apologize for making their lives miserable...

They were going to ask you to take a step back and stay out of the way...

You're always in the way...

Romans' nails dug tighter into his palms. A trickle of blood making its way down his hand. Virgil was starting to look at him worried. Why on earth would he be worried about him?

He didn't deserve it.

You don't deserve it...

"Well... We've just been wondering... Are you-"

"Are you ok!" Virgil blurted out. Blushing furiously when everyone turned to look at him. "Sorry..." He muttered quietly. "The suspense was driving me up the wall... anxiety and all..."

"That's alright, Virgil." Thomas reassured calmly, "But that is what we're here to talk about. Are you ok Roman?" He asked, turning to the fanciful trait.

Roman was... confused, to say the least. His fists relaxed and unfurled and he looked baffled at the others. They were asking if he was ok? Why did they care? Weren't they mad at him? He had messed up big time and they weren't even going to comment on that? "Uuh... Sure?... Why?" He asked hesitantly.

"You haven't left your room in over a week, kiddo," Patton said, playing with the sleeves of his cat hoodie like he did when he was upset. "We were worried bout you."

They don't mean it...

They're only doing this to show face...

Why on earth would they worry about you after all that you've done...

"Well, I am fine, padre," Roman answered, ignoring the stabbing pain in his chest. "I have just been in my room working in some ideas for Thomas' videos. That's all." He answered. They all looked around at one another, clearly not believing him.

Why would they belive you?...

What have you done to make them believe you? Let alone trust you?...

In fact, they believe that lying snake more than you...

"Oh, Roman," A hiss rang out that sent chills down his spine. "For an actor, you are such a 'good' lier..." Janus said, looking at his gloves like he could examine his nails from underneath them.

"I have no idea what you mean," Roman said, doing his best to keep his mouth in check.

God, how horrible of a person do you have to be to have to try and not be an asshole...

No wonder they hate you...

Roman let out an involuntary flinch, doing his best to ignore the stares he was receiving from the others. "Seriously," Janus said softer, "Are you ok? You've been avoiding everyone."

Grate, now you've gone and upset them...

Roman's hands were back into tight fusts, trying to block out the pain. "A-and you look a mess," Virgil added quietly. "Your concealer is patchy and you look exhausted. Have you even slept?" He asked.

"Of course I have! I-"

"Lies," Janus stated simply.

How stupid can you be to think you can just lie like that with Janus here...

Roman flinched back at the comment, his nails digging further into his palms and drawing out more blood. "Roman, are you ok?" Logan asked, "You seem to be in pain. Are you hurt?" He asked, moving closer to Roman to see if he could find any injuries.

All you do is cause problems for them...

Roman quickly backed away, "Of course I'm fine!" He insisted, continuing before Janus could interrupt him, " "But, yes, I haven't been sleeping too often because I've been working on these ideas!" Roman said, holding up his small stack of papers.

How pathetic...

A creativity who can't even come up with enough good ideas...

Are you sure you've earned the title 'creativity'...

Roman's forced smile flickered slightly at the pain. Blood lightly smearing onto the stacks of papers he held in his own hand. "You shouldn't overwork yourself, Roman." Thomas softly scolded. "I know that things have been stressful lately-"

All because you can't keep your stupid mouth shut...

"-But you need to take a break and go easier on yourself."

"I'll be fine!" Roman insisted, "I just needed to pump out a few more ideas and the ill take a break! I promise!"

You should no better than to make promises you can't keep...

He bit back a flinch, hoping the others didn't notice. But they did. They looked back and forth at each other wondering what they should do. "Well..." Thomas paused. "Then... Let's see your ideas."

"What?"

"Let's see these ideas you've been working on."

"Um- Well... Uh..."

They're not good enough...

They're going to hate them...

They will hate you if you show them these ideas...

You spent so long on horrible ideas...

What will that make them think of you?...

You should have done better...

They're not good enough...

You're not good enough...

Thomas would be better without you...

They all would...

Romans' hands were now lightly shaking, but he didn't seem to notice. "I d-don't think that's the best idea. They still need revised and worked on some more before there more... Presentable?" He said hesitantly.

"We can help you review them," Logan suggested. "You are far too overworked to have to handle them on your own."

Roman sifted from one foot to another, "Yeah... But like you said I am a bit overworked, so most-"

All...

"- of these ideas might not be so good. I still need to revise them and touch them up a bit before I can show you guys..." He answered.

"Just let us help you, kiddo." Patton insisted.

Virgil nodded in agreement, "You have been overworking yourself to the point of exhaustion. We can take some of the load off." He promised, "Just trust us..."

Roman still looked rather hesitant. "I'm not sure. The ideas are... Not so good at the moment..."

Janus spoke up, "Oh Roman. There is no reason to be so insecure about your work, I'm sure whatever it is we will all love it."

Insecure...

I̶̲͌n̵̨̓s̵̞͌e̵̛̱c̴̭͠ȗ̵͍r̷͎̀e̴̪͘.̷̛͕.̷̨̋.̶̣͒

"I am not Ḭ̴̧̡̧̟̥̮͓̥̜̪̯̭͈̬͍̔̉̈́͋͂̑̈́͒ṇ̶̭̙̼̭̭̱̦̽̉̂̓͊͌̍̍͐̈̔̄̃̚ş̷̡̢͙͔̦̙̳͙̖̪͖̲̝̥̪͂̆͗̇̊̾͛̔̃͐̊̏̕͝e̸̢̪̟̣͇̖̖̯̅̈̈̽̀̈́̂c̷̹̫̭̘̤̺̳͓̺̊ų̴͎̲̱͚̮̮̏̄̃̊̿̀̔̈́̑͛́̑͘r̶̹̳̘̤̟̙̬͓͙̩̭̟̫͇͖̦̲̍̉̀̃͗͊̏̿͊̋͋͛͜e̷̛̖̩̗͔͑͂͌̉̂̾̕!" His voice shook the room.

He let out a shocked gasp and slapped his hand over his mouth as the others looked on in startled shock. He felt like was shaking down to his very core. "Roman...?"

"I-i am sorry! I- I have no idea what that was...": he insisted softly. He looked confused when everyone looked at him even more concerned. Glancing down at his hand, he finally noticed the blood seeping out of the cuts made by his nails. He was stunned for a moment before quickly whipping the blood off of his face using his sleave.

Logan was quick to his side, examining his hands. Causing him to drop his papers and scatter them across the floor. Logan was talking as he cleaned Roman's hands before bandaging them. But Roman didn't hear anything. Just the ringing that echoed on his own ears.

You've really made a mess of things now...

That last comment tipped Roman over the edge, causing him to gasp out in pain. Nearly sinking to the floor if it wasn't for logan at his side, quick to help him keep steady. He tugged lightly at his sash, the pain quickly spreading like a burning fire.

The tug on his sash revealed the far larger black stain that had nearly filled the space behind his sash and was quickly spreading.

Janus and Virgil gasped. Horror seeping into there expressions as they realized what was happening to Roman. They were both quickly at Roman's side. The next thing he knew, Romans was sitting on the ground, struggling to breathe threw that pain. Virgil and Janus' hands held onto him comfortingly as they talked to him along with the others.

But Roman felt far-off at that moment. Like he wasn't in the room. Or as if he was a spectator, watching this unfold with an equally horrified expression. So he didn't hear a majority of what was said to him or the others.

"... Safe...ho-... Long..."

"...Roman?..."

"...-Breath Ro-..."

"...-man's falling..."

"...falling..."

Romans breathing grew more erratic once he looked down to see the black spot spiderwebbed out further, staining more and more of his once crisp white suit.

Then there was a hand in his hair and a few holding his hands and rubbing soothingly over his back and someone whispered calming words to him. Wanting him to follow there breathing. It was a struggle, but eventually, he managed to get his breathing slightly under control.

"-oman... Roman... You need to remain calm." Virgil said softly. Roman's head jerked as he nodded. Focusing on his breathing. "Do you know what's happening?" Virgil asked. Roman shook his head. "Your..." Virgil hesitated. "Your falling..." He said, "To the other side. So you need to keep calm and breath so we can help you..."

Romans heart figuratively stopped beating at the news. He was... Falling? Everything started to feel foggy and distant again. Like he wasn't there. He didn't want to be there. Sitting in front of the others. Vulnerable and in pain. Having the others watch his humiliating downfall. How low must they think of him now? How weak was he in their eyes? How pathetic was he in Thomas' eyes...

His chest suddenly shook as all the air seemed to leave his lungs. He couldn't breathe. He couldn't breathe. He could vaguely hear Virgil's voice become more panicked and others began chiming in. But he was far to gone to understand it at this point. He needed to leave.

He needed to leave.

He wanted to leave.

He couldn't breathe.

He just needed to leave.

Leave.

Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave.

A rush of airbrushed past him as he managed to force himself to sink out to a far side of Thomas' mindscape where they would never find him.

He curled up into a ball, squeezing his nails into his palms, and cried in pain.

#roman sanders #roman angst #insecure roman #sanders sides angst #thomas sanders #sanders sides fanfiction #my fanfiction

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plasticnightmaredoll · 4 years ago

Video

youtube

disclaimer: not my video and thankfully, I didn’t have anything to do with the performance.

I have just recently gotten into K/DA (no, I don’t play League of Legends as it’s just not my kind of game but it looks good from what I have seen) and am obsessed 😩

I stumbled across this video just today and omg...somebody probably got fired! 🤔

The animation quality was like someone went into the bargain bin at Wal-Mart and pulled out whatever looked decent and of course, got exactly what you’d expect from a bargain bin.

Kai’sa looked like a PS2 character.

Ahri’s warp-speed SWOOSH to the center of the stage like a Looney Tunes character. I did crappy animation warps like this in Adobe Flash, like, 10+ years ago.

Akali’s face here

Seraphine was a low-res .gif from the Internet.

Evelynn looked like a goddess, which I’m not complaining about because she’s a sexy demon chick 👀

The lighting was all over the place. I mean, they were never consistently shaded with the surrounding environment. I know they aren’t real people so, yeah, some lighting issues could be expected, but damn--it just looked so bad!

Sometimes the girls looked bored while dancing...for whatever reason. It was like they just gave up for a bit on animating the characters. “Yo, we don’t have the budget to make them dance too much so, like...just have them move around a bit.” - someone behind the animation for this performance

What is happening to Kai’sa’s arms?!

I know it may seem like I’m nitpicking and, “THEY ARE JUST CGI SO WHAT DO U WANT?” but as someone who is a fan and admirer of art and animation, a (new) fan of K/DA, the popularity (and 💰MONEYS 💰 ) of League of Legends, and the fact that they can do much better with animating characters outside of the game, I think this is just pitiful.

Yes, it was a dark arena, but that doesn’t excuse the poor-quality renders for everyone except Evelynn. I mean, Kai’sa got the short straw, clearly, as she just looked AWFUL. Why treat Kai’sa so terribly?

Also, I would think that they’d have spent time planning this event in advance, like, testing things out so they could make the animation look as good as possible. Studying the real world and applying what you observe to the animation is the name of the game, right?

And if it’s NOT important to get an animated performance to look great -- which you think iwould be important since it’s representing the company and League of Legends -- then...........why bother making the performance animated at all?

But hey, they did good with Evelynn at least. 🤷‍♀️

Regardless, I can say that, as a developer, if I turned in a project for a client that was a hot mess like this performance, I’d be out the door and looking for a new job 😮

#k/da #league of legends #kai'sa #ahri #evelynn #akali #seraphine #league of legends opening ceremony #animation #cgi

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mysterious-prophetess · 4 years ago

Text

Review: Red Shoes and the Seven Dwarves

It’s finally out in my region so I was finally able to get my hands on it to watch without risking my computer.

Not that I would resort to such....less-than-legal means... <.<

Anyway, I’m glad I did buy it officially. It was every bit as cute as I thought it would be after I saw the new round of trailers and comments by others on tumblr.

I’ll give my spoiler free thoughts now and go into more details under a read more.

So first, I have to compliment the animation. It is so beautiful. The characters all looked great and none of them looked uncanny at all. My favorite character design of the humans was Snow sans shoes, but Merlin in his normal form is a close second. It’s their eyes.

My favorite non-human character design was the magic mirror.

The magic effects were also nicely done.

The plot’s pacing was decent. There were times where it almost felt like they had built in commercial breaks for an eventual network airing from how some parts would cut to black and start a new scene. It wasn’t often and it didn’t really detract from the film.

The characters were all consistent and Snow White/Red Shoes was down right relatable for me. Merlin and the other six Princes were fun and played off one another, though the trio of Pino Noki Kio almost felt like they didn’t need to be three characters since they never acted independent of one another. Whereas Jack, Hans, Arthur, and Merlin all had their own distinct personalities.

Even the Evil Queen had some good moments.

Prince Average felt like an after thought.

The moral of the story, while done before and nearly to death, was given a fresh spin in this film.

Over all this film is charming and the marketing team that screwed them over with the fat-shaming like ad campaign should never be hired by these guys ever again. There is no fat shaming in this film directed at Snow White/Red Shoes.

The lesson is instead a good one.

I heartily recommend people watch this movie. There are some semi-Shrek like elements on occasion (like out of place pop culture references) but overall the film has its own identity.

Another nitpick aside from the weird commercial breaks that kept seeming to happen and that’s the over use of the movie’s main pop song. I liked it the first time but after a few other reuses it started to get a little stale.

Otherwise I loved the music of the film.

Snow White’s journey was one that I loved. She had one mission and one mission only: find her father. In fact her desire to be herself contradicted the shoes magic. She was perfectly happy as her normal self and not the magic enhanced version the shoes transformed her into. That’s a powerful message to send to girls who aren’t skinny or traditionally pretty. Though, Snow White is down right adorable as her true self.

I also liked that the perfectly pretty form wasn’t something Snow White necessarily liked but was willing to use to her advantage to help find her father. I also liked that it had drawbacks as Snow White in her normal state was actually a physically strong woman but as a dainty pretty girl all that strength she had and liked having was gone. Furthermore, the movie showed that Snow White was decently athletic as her real self, which was a refreshing take for a heavier character. Large doesn’t equal flabby, weak, or out-of-shape.

Snow White’s struggles with taking off the magical shoes were reflective of the times where she got insecure about herself. Despite loving who she was, she did sometimes accept the pretty dainty form because of how much nicer people were.

The Magic Mirror was surprised she could even take them off because it meant there was something she wanted more than being pretty. The first time, at Risky Rock in the Fearsome Seven’s house, it was her desire to be herself. In the alleyway, it was a desire to escape the goons. In the river it was her desire to save Merlin. Yet, whenever she wanted to take them off other times, things had happened to make her hesitate on giving up the conventionally pretty form that had made it so others would help her.

As someone who is not conventionally pretty and definitely not skinny, I really empathized with Snow White about this.

On no occasion was Snow’s true self ever treated like a joke. There was the scene after she’d taken the shoes off where guards were harassing her where it almost looked like Merlin and Arthur would ignore her peril because she wasn’t her Red Shoes form, but Merlin came back and helped her. He was even kind of nice to her.

Never even when Merlin finds out about the shoes versus her real form does he call her ugly or make comments about her weight despite being still kind of fighting his own ego while learning the lesson at this point.

Speaking of Merlin (and the others of the F7).

Merlin being the main male protagonist does get the most screen time. Arthur get the second most. Then Hans and Jack, and then the Pinocchio Trio.

At first their dynamics were all clashing and Arthur seemed like a bully and Merlin seemed like a very shallow impulsive jerk. Let’s be clear, all the guys are shallow. Even the trio who are more obsessed with their inventions half the movie. It’s what got them cursed by the fairy princess in the first place. Considering it was a fairy they pissed off, being turned into green dwarves when anyone (who isn’t a magical creature) looks at them was actually getting off mild.

I was surprised that each Prince actually has to break their curses one at-a-time. It’s not a “break the curse for one and you save all” which was a new take on a collectively applied curse. Which was why they were every-dwarf-for-them-selves when it came to trying to woo “Red Shoes” and get a kiss from her.

Merlin’s character journey was one that is usually reserved for the curse breaker in fairy tale movies where a curse indeed is in play. In that he was the one who had to learn to look past appearances. I love that Snow White calls him out on that at one point in the movie too.

Merlin learning to let go of his obsession with looks (his own included) was what allowed him to see Snow White as the most beautiful woman in the world (in his eyes) which was what let her second kiss at the end break his curse. Because he saw her inner beauty which mattered more than any physical appearance she had.

The characters grew and them ending up together at the end felt natural and not forced because the time they spent together always felt like they had chemistry which is hard to pull off.

Moving on to other things: Regina, Magic Mirror, and Average.

Honestly? Average felt like a real waste of time. It was through his lines we got the most Shrek-like throw-away references, it was he who had the least impact on the plot, and he who could have been written out of the flick almost all together. Yeah, Merlin recognizing his tree-i-fied form did hint at what Regina had done to others (and it was after he and his two not-the-Stabbington-brothers-goons became evil ents that I figured out King White was that wood bunny because it was large and cute and that was the White Family’s designs overall).

Average was a throw away character. In many ways he wasn’t even mediocre let alone average.

The worst thing about him is he can be easily written out of the movie.

As the stepmother of Snow White, Regina is queen of the kingdom and all the scenes where soldiers go after Snow White and the F7 could have been her sending people to do her dirty work to spare her magic usage.

Average’s two goombas? Hired thugs who’d never seen Snow White before. Take him out, shuffle a few things around, make a captain character be his replacement in the attack on Risky Rock scene, and nothing of value would be lost in his removal. Average is the film’s only major mistake. He was a dead end that could have been easily written around and the screen time would have been better spent on Snow White and the F7 or maybe fleshing out Regina a little more.

Magic Mirror and Regina both played well off one another. Patrick Warburton as any character will always be an excellent casting choice.

Regina’s schemes made sense from a shallow perspective.

I saw someone compare her to Mother Goethel from Tangeled in a youtube comment on one of the trailers and kinda?

They had the same sort of vanity-wanting to keep their youth and maintain their beauty-and their penchant for cloaks was the same but, Regina to me....was more like Mother Goethel and Triss Marigold from Witcher 3′s fusion. Her younger form reminded me WAY more of Triss than Goethel as did her gown. Plus, it’s canonic in the Witcher-verse that sorceresses use magic to keep young. Also, she’s not the first evil queen of a Snow White retelling to even be obsessed with youth to the point she goes to extreme lengths to maintain it. See Snow White and the Huntsman’s queen.

Regina stands out as her own character despite sharing a name and role with Regina of Once Upon a Time. She’s ruthless, and able to manipulate others with either her words or illusionary magic (though it costs her like the witches from Stardust). She’s also absolutely cold. She just kind of falls flat compared to the Magic Mirror.

No offense to the voice actress or the writers, but up against Patrick Warburton’s Magic Mirror/tree character, Regina is a little less memorable to me. He has more sass and more pure threat to him than Regina does. Sure, she has magic that can turn people into strange tree monsters, but it’s the mirror that gives the F7 the most trouble throughout the movie, and they fought off something that looked to be a whole platoon of guards/soldiers armed with heavy artillery (canons). Granted, it was a close call that relied on their wits and other skills, but they still had less trouble with that fight than they did against Magic Mirror.

Some More Things:

The humor was nearly overplayed but they managed to tow the line between going too far and just right. Mostly this was seen with the F7 and their attempts to get Snow White to kiss them and break their spells, especially Arthur.

They did give him more of a character beyond loud bully, which was that he had a sensitive side and a lot of pride (which was easily bruised). In fact, only he and Merlin felt like they had characterizations compared to the other five. Hans was obsessed with cooking and Jack with jewels and the trio with tech but that’s all they got beyond having their friends’ backs whenever it really mattered and being awesome badasses. Since these other five were mostly side characters, this is more of a nitpick than an actual problem since the film was setting up Arthur vs Merlin for Snow White’s affections.

The fact that Snow White brushes all the attempts of flirting off so easily was very amusing to me and a nice way of showing how she was focused on finding her missing father throughout the whole film (despite the fact that she had already found him). Hilariously, in hindsight, she really had seen him in the woods. If she’d been herself, who knows if he’d have even attacked her.

Finally, I’ll end on what had seemed like an inconsistency but now I realize is a loophole because the fae have those in everything. The guys have to be alone or have the person they’re with close their eyes to be their true selves, except Merlin is still his true form even though he’s not alone with the Magic Mirror or the wood rabbit/King, or the three wood bears/children.

Turns out, once I thought about it, the fairy’s curse was if “people looked at them” which meant, the ones doing the looking had to be people and the wood creatures-despite formerly being people-were considered to be people no longer. The Mirror was probably never a person, which mean he’d never counted as a part of “people” so he could look all he wanted (which was his thing as a mirror). It’s an interesting loophole.

Long story short, I really enjoyed this film. It was very cute and it was done so dirty by its marketing three years ago.

Good film. Good messages. Go watch it! It’s not like we’ve anything ELSE to do at the moment (and it’s not like there are any other worthwhile films coming out right now). Support this film, and this studio.

#red shoes and the 7 dwarfs #rsat7d #red shoes and the seven dwarves #red shoes and the seven dwarfs #review #it's a good movie

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belleandkurtbastian · 4 years ago

Text

Okay, more awake now. Time for thoughts on Skam France Season 5.

(Note: I will be translating “personnes en situation de handicap” as “disabled people”, the term preferred within my social spheres over “people with disabilities”. I will also be translating “sourd” and “surdité”, as they relate to Arthur, as “deaf” and “deafness” respectively. I understand that these terms have social and community meanings that some may or may not consider as applying to Arthur, but the translation is already fuzzy due to different community boundaries cross-linguistically.)

Background: I’ve watched Skam S3-4, and Skam France S3-4 before this.

Of the those 5 seasons, I think Skam France S5 is the best-constructed. The tone, pacing, and content is the best-realised. I think Skam S3 will always be the favourite in my mind, for personal reasons, but I find it hard to say that Skam S3 is “better” than Skam FR S5.

So, getting into it:

First: the Skam France writers clearly do well unshackled from the expectation of imitation. They don’t have source material to adapt here, so it’s a wholly new series, and they take that to their advantage. My problems with S3 and S4, where they were changing and moving things from the original in ways that I considered a pure downgrade? Not a factor here.

Okay, the actual content: it’s pretty rare to see later-in-life disabilities represented. Like, you’ll get people who are terminally ill, and you’ll get people who were disabled from birth or since early childhood, but it’s so rare that media actually follows the story of someone BECOMING disabled, and I really appreciate that.

And my God, they packed a lot into those 10 episodes. They have the entire “between two worlds” thing, brief discussions of language around disability, treatment of the differing needs of different disabled people and communities, medical interventions, pressure around medical intervention from parents and medical staff, the use of a variety of assistive devices (two different types of hearing aids, cochlear implants, live transcription apps), Arthur learning LSF, Arthur getting his sign name...

And that’s all just kind of peripheral stuff to the overall story of Arthur accepting and owning his deafness.

I want to talk in particular about the point where Arthur tells Noée “je ne suis pas entendant” (”I am not a hearing person”), because that scene has me a little conflicted. I get that rhetorically, it’s a powerful scene, and he then spends the next several clips without his hearing aids in. But it bugs me a LITTLE, purely because Arthur had already been owning the label “sourd” for a couple of episodes before this, at school, and socially in general. The way that the declaration is played as this Big Thing™ doesn’t really fit with the way that Arthur had been describing himself before.

But I guess it’s a community thing. I’m not sure if Arthur had owned his deafness to any other D/deaf people before that. And that “pas entendant” and “sourd” are different nuances.

I don’t know. I like the arc overall, even here, it just felt a little... muddied. Maybe the intent came through better to others, and to D/deaf/HoH people.

Briefly, the D/deaf characters within the show. We only really get introduced to two. There are several background characters, but we focus on Noée and Camille.

First of all, Noée. I like her. I think she’s a very realistic character, and she’s clearly there to guide both Arthur AND the audience into the community, but without a full hand-holding lead. The romantic subplot... Eh, the whole “cheating on Alexia” part makes me uncomfortable, but the actual development felt very organic and earned, and it really sold the “entre deux mondes” concept well. I think that the lack of a firm resolution at the end of the season is fine. It works narratively and rhetorically, with Arthur still feeling somewhat “entre deux mondes”.

And then Camille. Honestly, I’m surprised that Skam France introduced an LGBTQ+ deaf character. Arthur already had Alexia, his bi girlfriend, and it would have been SUPER easy for the writers to justify not adding any more queer characters around Arthur. I am *not* objecting to this turn, though. While most of the disabled characters I know on TV are queer, that’s more to do with the media I watch, rather than some grand representation win.

Anyway, Camille is a fine character. I think he’s the most... “we need a character who fills this role” character (a go-between for Arthur/Noée and the designated “you’re an idiot” guy for the season) that the show has had so far, but I think he’s a fine character. His relationship with Mika? We don’t see much of it, at all, but I think that works considering who those characters are in relation to the rest of the main cast. Camille’s sexuality and relationships aren’t important to Arthur’s story, but they’re still *there* in the show.

And then all the social stuff with Arthur’s friends. I think this was handled... well, by the show. Less well by the characters...

But the tension between them, and the overall discontent... It felt less dramatic than Lucas’ and Imane’s seasons’ tension. And I know some people wouldn’t like that, but I do. I think that they played into the “well-meaning friends don’t know what to do” thing well, without excusing Arthur’s friends’ actions, and also without the absolute feeling of despair and emptiness that Lucas and Imane got into at a certain point in their seasons (ditto, Isak and Sana).

They draw that weird parallel to Lucas’ secrets, too. And like... first of all, the whole “We don’t keep secrets” thing is laughable considering that Lucas’ season was only a year ago. But secondly, is this just going to be a thing now? Anything after an Isak’s season will be compared to the Isak’s problems? Like with the Sana/Isak (Imane/Lucas) conversation in S4?

Anyway, that’s kind of a nitpick.

I really liked Skam France S5.

Oh, and I finally figured out how to watch it: French subs, English transcript. Only took me three seasons :P

#.n #.text #skam france #skam fr

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rutilation · 5 years ago

Photo

hi I have some theories about the Problematic Rock

In my essay for chapter 82, I said that I had settled on a theory of What The Deal Is With Cairngorm. My thoughts on the subject are a bit all over the place, so in the hope of presenting things in a coherent manner, I’ve laid out my thought process from the past eleven months or so in roughly chronological order, beginning with the nitpick that started it all. Welcome to my twisted mind, and all that.

For the most part, the way the series applies fantasy concepts to actual geology has been fairly sound. For example, tourmaline generates an electric charge when heated, so Melon radiates electricity when upset. Cinnabar the rock often comes out of the ground covered in native mercury, so Cinnabar the character is surrounded by magical floating mercury. Alexandrite turns red or purple in incandescent light, so the light the Lunarians give off changes Alex’s color and gives them a mood swing to boot. It’s exaggerated and fantastical, but it’s nonetheless grounded in some nugget of geology trivia which one might find on the back of a Snapple cap. But, Ghost and Cairn’s condition in the story does not line up with how phantom crystals work, even within the science-fantasy framework we’ve got going here. At first, I just filed it away next to other inaccuracies such as Antarc shouldn’t be able to trudge through snow without dissolving in a puddle of their own brine, much less dive into the ocean unscathed. However, if my theory(s) is correct, then this apparent lapse in the internal logic of the story might have in fact been deliberate foreshadowing. But I’m getting ahead of myself.

First, some context. Phantom crystals form by way of two distinct but related processes:

During a crystal’s formation out of a solution, its growth is temporarily halted for one of any number of reasons. During this time, dust falls onto the surface of the crystal. As the crystal begins growing again, these tiny debris become trapped within, and if the rest of the crystal is sufficiently transparent, the included material appears from the outside as the outline of a crystal within a crystal.

The other process to which this term applies involves color zoning, and is a bit easier to explain. During a crystal’s formation, the chemicals that make up the solution change slightly, and these impurities cause one part of the crystal to become a different color from another part. If the color zoning is concentric, and the different colors in question are visible from outside the crystal, it can be labeled a phantom crystal. Ghost and Cairn appear to be this second type.

So here’s what I’m getting at: a phantom crystal is not two separate crystals, in much the same way that the rings in a tree trunk aren’t a bunch of separate trees. Therefore, it doesn’t make sense for Ghost and Cairngorm to be two separate people, and if they are actually intended to be examples of this phenomenon, it raises some questions. For one thing, watermelon tourmaline forms via the exact same process of concentric color zoning I described in example number two; since you usually can’t see the pinkish part from outside of the green layer of crystal, it’s not often labeled a phantom crystal, but it’s the same phenomenon nonetheless. So, why is it that Cairn and Ghost are two different people, but the green and red parts of Melon aren’t? For that matter, why aren’t the two halves of Euclase two separate people? There’s certainly more of colorless-Euclase than there is of Ghost. If mere color zoning were enough, then why are Ghost and Cairn the only examples of highly-conjoined-twins amongst the cast? Unless of course, we weren’t given an accurate picture of how these two came to be, and there’s something fishy going on.

Of course, whether or not this little contradiction is actually meaningful wholly depends on if Ichikawa was even aware of the distinction as she was writing. As I recall she once said in an interview that she wasn’t very familiar with geology in the first place before she started writing hnk. But, like I said at the beginning of this essay, this is what got me started down the rabbit hole. From this observation arose two different trains of thought. One came to me pretty quickly, but the other took a few months to materialize.

The first idea that popped into my head when I realized that this inaccuracy could have been deliberate was that Ghost and Cairngorm might not be separate people, and there was some split-personality shenanigans going on. I’ll quickly list the things I think this theory has going for it with some bullet points.

Remember that one time, when Cairngorm referred to Ghost as their “former self?” And that other time, in the official translation of volume 6, when they referred to Ghost as their “other half?” That is rather curious terminology for referring to one’s sibling.

That one time in chapter 39, where Cairn repeated Ghost’s sentiment about being “tired of praying” verbatim, and the composition of the panels seemingly called attention to it.

It would serve to explain a certain contradiction in Cairn’s personality: despite their aggressive—and at times violent—demeanor, they nonetheless act like a total doormat in all the ways that really matter. They live their life according to someone else’s wishes, they’re quick to pass off decision making to others, and they fold under pressure pretty easily. What if Cairngorm is, in fact, Ghost’s idea of what being assertive is like, without any understanding of what it means to actually be independent or confident?

A common critique of the story is that Ghost’s character was rather perfunctory, and their death felt like a second-rate retread of Antarc’s fate. Well, if Cairn and Ghost are the same person, then they weren’t actually unceremoniously dropped from the story after all. Come to think of it, right before they were supposedly taken, Ghost said they wanted to change; what if they actually did?

As many of you have noticed, Ghost is one of the few characters who isn’t ProblematiqueTM . Doubtlessly, Ichikawa now regrets killing them off before they could do something kinda nasty. Even Antarc got the chance to cluelessly trample over Phos’s self-esteem before getting turned into road salt. But, if it were revealed that Ghost was actually the same character as creamed corn, then Ichikawa could drag their good name through the mud with one fell swoop. (I’m just trying to think from her perspective, guys! Her cruel, sadistic perspective…)

But ultimately, when I got around to wondering why on earth they would have a split personality in the first place, I found that this line of inquiry raised more questions than answers. Unlike my second theory, which mostly just raises answers.

(I know I just dumped a big tinfoil hat at my readers’ feet like a cat gifting its owner a decapitated bird, but please keep bearing with me, I’m not even halfway done.)

The idea that I’ve found to be the most fruitful came in the weeks following chapter 75. I’ve brought up this line from Aechmea multiple times (probably to the point of redundancy,) because it’s the biggest hint we’ve gotten so far that there’s some Cairn-related context we’re not yet privy to. And the more the narrative keeps reminding us of it—usually by way of Cairngorm bringing it up with varying levels of anxiety—the more it seems to be alluding to something important. So I got to thinking that whatever my little plot twist was, it would have to account for Aechmea’s cryptic bullshit. I put forward a couple preliminary ideas in my essay for chapter 75, but I’ve since discarded those in favor of my second theory.

So, somehow Aechmea knew Cairngorm before they came to the moon, and neither Cairngorm, (nor Ghost for that matter,) remembers meeting him. When I tried to think of how this could be possible, while also keeping in mind my little bugbear about phantom crystals, I developed a theory that’s much more pedestrian by the standards of the hnk fandom. I am of course, talking about the mysterious artificial gem experiments that the Lunarians conducted. That sure is a plot element which has been left dangling, huh? And since no one, least of all myself, believes Stinkmea when he claims that the experiments were a complete failure, it has been a favored pastime of people who write walls of text to speculate on who amongst the cast might have been planted on earth by the Lunarians; e.g. Obsidian, Antarc, new Morga and Goshe… I imagine someone at some point has even postulated that Phos themselves is from the moon. But, if you pay close attention to how Aechmea, and later, Barbata describe the process by which they attempted to create artificial gems, it lines up strikingly well with what we know about Ghost and Cairngorm, and it also serves to explain the geological inaccuracy I was talking about earlier.

Aechmea describes how the Lunarians tried to create their own gems by grafting pieces of gems they had captured from earth onto artificial bodies, and that they were dumped on earth before being retrieved after they showed no signs of life. Barbata also mentions it later, in more oblique terms. He’s speaking vaguely, but his warning to Phos feels a bit odd in its specificity. The use of the phrase “emotionally delicate” also raises my eyebrows a bit. I may be reading too much into this, but I feel that his hypothetical example is less hypothetical than he’s letting on. Perhaps, he is in fact referring to a certain someone in particular, who is emotionally fragile, and subsequently lost their sense of self after being subjected to this experiment. Hmmm…

So here’s what I think went down: once upon a time, probably before the current generation of gems had been born, there was a gem on earth who was just plain old colorless Quartz. I’m going to call them OG!Quartz. One day, OG!Quartz is captured by the Lunarians, and Aechmea uses them for his little gem experiment, probably with Barbata being the one to carry it out. He shaves off the outermost layer of OG!Quartz and discards the rest of them. Then, he grafts those pieces onto an artificial body made of black Quartz. The inclusions from OG!Quartz permeate into the artificial material, and thus Cairngorm is born. The Lunarians subsequently dump them on earth, at which point Kongou, who may or may not realize what’s going on, picks them up and names them Ghost Quartz, despite the fact that they didn’t come about via that process.

This would explain a lot of things. If so little of OG!Quartz was used to make Ghost Quartz, they would likely be unable to remember their previous life, or the ensuing events on the moon, for that matter. And since Cairngorm would be a newborn at the time, they wouldn’t be able to remember Aechmea either, thus solving the riddle of how Aechmea knew Cairngorm before they came the moon.

It would also clue us in to what Aechmea meant by love, why he was quick to swoop in and take advantage of Cairn, and why he kept Cairn’s original arm around. If they were the one success after a series of failed experiments, it’s possible that Aechmea feels a sense of ownership over Cairn, as if they’re his accomplishment. (Yikes.)

It would also explain another thing that has stuck in mind. The way Ghost was taken was kind of weird, wasn’t it? At the time, the Lunarians were being oddly particular about nabbing Ghost instead of Cairn. Usually, the Lunarians try to shatter the gems and be done with it, not shave a bunch of little pieces off the outside. Furthermore, Cairngorm was thoroughly wrecked by the end of that fight. The Lunarians could have easily grabbed them both and gotten away before help could arrive, but instead, they pushed Cairn off of the vessel and only took Ghost. If we assume though that Ghost and Cairn are the result of one of those gem experiments, the Lunarians actions during that battle start to make sense. Perhaps the Lunarians wanted to see if Cairngorm was alive in their own right, or if the pieces of Ghost were just dragging the rest of the body around. They wouldn’t be able to tell the difference from their distant vantage point. So, they nabbed Ghost and intentionally left Cairn behind in order to further observe their experiment.

(I should point out that when I say “the Lunarians,” assume I’m referring to Aechmea, Barbata, and perhaps a handful of other unnamed extras. Aechmea probably doles out knowledge of his obtuse schemes on a need-to-know basis, and I doubt people like Cicada, or Quieta, or Goshe’s gnarly skater friends know anything about this.)

Going back to this page, Cairn’s expression has stuck in my mind. They’re trembling, and have a fearful look on their face. By all accounts, even if what Aechmea just said was confusing, it should still be something Cairn would be happy to hear. But their immediate reaction is one of understated horror. It’s almost as if they intuited that there was something very wrong with that statement, even if they can’t put their finger on why. This leads us into another question that’s been on my mind which this theory might serve to explain.

In my very first essay about Caringorm, I ran into a bit of a wall when trying to figure out why Cairngorm’s personality is the way it is. I figured at the time that Cairngorm’s issues arose from having no agency for most of their life, and that their relationship with Ghost was perhaps much less amicable than we were lead to believe. And while it’s hard to argue that being a prisoner in their own body for most of their life hasn’t messed them up, I don’t think that’s the only thing going on here. Furthermore, as far as Cairn’s relationship with Ghost was concerned, we haven’t heard anything about it since, which leads me to believe that it’s not where the trouble lies. While I still stand by most of what I said in that essay—particularly about how Cairn’s dependency complex compels them to treat themselves as a vehicle for someone else’s desires—there’s a major aspect to all of this that I overlooked at the time. During their brief tenure in the series, Ghost exhibited a lot of the same issues that Cairngorm does now.

The way they talked about living life following Lapis’s orders—as if they were Lapis’s lackey rather than their partner, the way they latched onto Phos so strongly after they showed them the barest hint of interest, their abysmal self-esteem… It all seems eerily similar to Cairn’s issues, even if it manifested in a more muted fashion. So, why is it that Ghost exhibited some of Cairngorm’s maladaptive coping mechanisms, despite the fact that Cairn should have been the only one of the two who needed to develop them in the first place?

I haven’t exactly put too fine a point on it since I don’t live with the condition myself, and thus don’t want to risk putting my foot in my mouth, but I can’t really elucidate on this in a concise manner while dancing around the subject. Ever since chapter 68, I’ve been looking at Cairngorm through the lens of borderline personality disorder. Since they seem to check more and more boxes off the symptom list with each new chapter, I think it’s a useful lens through which to view them, whether or not it’s one that Ichikawa had in mind. But, BPD generally arises from trauma, to the extent that many psychologists see it as an alternate manifestation of PTSD. So, for the longest time, I’ve wondered how it was that Cairn and Ghost ended up the way they did. There’s no clear answer in the narrative at this point.

This brings us to what Barbata alluded to, that the process of trying to create an artificial gem was damaging to the minds of the those who were subjected to it. If Ghost and Cairn were (re)born as the result of something terrible, something that destroyed their sense of self, it might explain why they both have mental issues that are indicative of past trauma, despite those issues not having any obvious source. The only other possible source of trauma I can come up with is that the relationship the two of them had with Lapis might have been an abusive one. But if that were the case, then there should have been some buildup for it in the chapters following 67. And while Lapis and Ghost have barely been mentioned in the interim, there’s been a whole lot of incremental reminders that Aechmea’s a shady bastard who’s hiding something from Cairn. Where there’s smoke, there’s probably a fire.

Well, that’s about it. Thanks for sticking with this to the end; hopefully, I didn’t make too many flagrant leaps in logic. Ichikawa, if you would be so kind as to confirm my theories, and also let Phos peacefully live out the rest of their days with their snail friends, I would really appreciate it. See you all in the essay for chapter 83.

#houseki no kuni #land of the lustrous #im kind of nervous about posting this #but if we want the rewards of meaningful engagement with art #we must subject ourselves to the mortifying ordeal of posting crack theories

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sciencelings-writes · 4 years ago

Text

The Golden Birdcage

A quick fic of my ocs in my fantasy au type of thing - This one features Rose and Adisa mainly but if there is any interest at all, I’ll write in more of my ocs

***

Rose dreaded the coming day, more than she dreaded any normal day. Today she cemented her place in the monarchy of the high fae. Before she was just a princess, an heiress, a disappointment. But today she was forced to step up to start taking power over the people she was destined to rule.

She was sure that she wasn’t the only one to dread it, she’d never really been popular among her people. She wasn’t born with a power that was seen as honorable or anything. While her mother could create massive crystalline spherical shields that protect the thousands of miles of their kingdom and her father could harness the power of their sun with powerful blasts of energy that could decimate armies, Rose could only heal. Sure, healing was an important and necessary power, but for a royal sunborn fairy? It was incredibly weak for the royal line, which was known to be the most powerful of the fae. There were rumors of her not being a true heir, being adopted, or a product of infidelity, but they were false, and there was no conceivable reason that she was born the way that she was.

For years she held her head up high and ignored those who looked at her like she was less than anyone else. She could not retaliate or express how she felt about it to anyone, not even her family. But it got so tiring. The only time she could rest was after she was dismissed for the day and could be herself alone in her room without any serving fae. She would take off her corset and release the tightest parts of her elaborate braids. She would let out the pent up emotions that she had been keeping inside all day, usually by writing which would be promptly burned with a candle or she would release her frustrations by sparring with a dummy. She always felt better with a sword in her hands.

But today would be worse than any of the days before. Not only would she not be alone for a single second, but it was one of the biggest days of her life and there was a lot of pressure on her. She had spent weeks preparing herself. Writing and memorizing a speech that she would have to recite in front of thousands of very important people, rehearsing the ceremony a dozen times with her mother pointing out a flaw every time. Sometimes it was something small like a hair out of place or a break in her facial expression, or a wrinkle in her dress, and sometimes it was detrimental like when she forgot a word or she stuttered causing her mother to yell at her. A stutter meant weakness and a mistake in words meant a lack of preparation, both of which were not a good sign in a new leader. Rose had always been sick of the perfection demanded of her.

Since the moment she woke up, she had been attended to with a handful of her servants focused on different parts of her appearance. Three doing her hair, two doing her makeup, and two more working with her clothes. She didn’t love being crowded at the best of times but this was definitely not comfortable for her in the slightest. She could barely breathe, her skin was covered in golden paints and powders, and the heeled shoes she had to wear everywhere was just the tip of the iceberg. She already deeply anticipated the end of the day when it would all be over and she would be free.

What made the day more bearable was that she was friendly with her servants. She wouldn’t call them friends but they respected each other and gossiped about anything that was going on in the palace. They were some of the only people who talked to her like she was a person and not a princess under the protection of the most powerful fae in the lands. They learned not to be afraid to joke around with her and be upfront with her as they were fully aware that she had no plans to punish them for not agreeing with her at every point. She knew that not all of them were on board with her becoming the queen but they still encouraged her and let her be at least slightly open about her feelings about things like food and music. She wouldn’t dare let their conversations stray close to topics she was more passionate about where she might let something more unsavory slip.

They arrived early in the morning when the shields were still dark. They were much more excited about the day than she was. Their excited chatter echoed throughout the pale stone halls enough to wake her several minutes before they even arrived. She relished her few moments alone before she was to be swarmed with familiar faces.

The handful of assorted fae scrambled in, a man adorned in indigo who was in charge of her dress and was the best at tying up her corset all nice and tight with barely enough room to breathe, a few older women in orange and violet respectively who would weave her hair like it was a decadent tapestry to place in the throne room to be showed off to prestigious guests, a young woman and a young man tasked with turning her face from pale and freckly to a work of art.

Rose was embarrassed to say that she didn’t know their names, not because she didn’t care to know but because she was just horrible at that kind of thing and had forgotten. Now after years of service, she was too afraid to ask. She remembered that the older women had grandchildren that worked in the kitchens and at the market and that one of them used to sing as the castle bard but pairing them with names was harder for Rose to remember. She was pretty sure that one of them was named Hesta but she could never remember which one it was.

“Good morning!” One of the elder fae sing-songed, “Today is the day!”

“It sure is isn’t it…” Rose said less than enthusiastically.

“Well now, don’t be nervous!” The serving fae collectively dragged her to get to work. She did her best to follow along and work with them but with all the chaos, she had a bit of trouble. Within seconds there were brushes passing through her orange and white hair and powder already being applied to her face. She rested her hands on the poles on both of her sides in anticipation for when the corset was to start its asphyxiating process.

“I’m not nervous…” She gained a few trivial stares when she said it, “Okay, yeah, I’m a little anxious this isn’t exactly a small thing.” She sighed.

“Of course, but you’ll do fine. You’ve prepared so much, I’d frankly be surprised if you managed to breathe at an imperfect moment.” The older fairy chuckled.

“Yeah, I know…” Rose took a couple of deep breaths, it didn’t help but it made her look more in control. She gripped the posts tightly and planted her feet on the ground as the white corset started to squeeze her organs. “It won’t all be bad, I guess I’m going to have to start to get used to being stared at.” She grunted at a particularly violent pull of the threads.

“You’ll do fine princess. You’re much stronger than they say that you are. Believe me.”

***

After several painstaking hours, Rose emerged for the pre-coordination ball in the ceremonial flowy iridescent white and gold gown. Her pearlescent pale segmented wings emerged from the openings in the white drapery that trailed behind her. She wore her small gold winged crown that would be replaced with a bigger more elaborate one during the ceremony. Her hair was braided tightly in a beautiful if a little painful bun style with ribbons coming from a flowery hairpiece made of pink and gold lilies and full white roses. Her makeup was filled with warm pinks with gold details framing a golden sun painted on her forehead. Her pointed ears were adorned with gold earrings linked with chains and dangling white opals.

She had to admit, the look was impressive. She looked like a celestial sun goddess and it made her feel better from how painful it was to achieve. She fluttered through the air to the dark chamber for the hour of meditation before the first ball. She was only left alone to wait for a few seconds before a voice broke through along with the sudden sounds of muffled crowds from the nearby rooms as the door opened and closed.

“You’re slouching.” Roses mother announced from behind her.

“I don’t think it’s possible to do so your highness. This corset feels like it’s made of steel and melded to my body.” She said bluntly.

“Your posture includes your neck darling.” The red-haired queen of the sun fae walked around her daughter as if she was inspecting her for a single piece of lint.

“If I had my neck any more vertical I wouldn’t be able to see the floor.” She sighed. When her mother looked satisfied she placed herself in front of her.

“You look…” Rose waited for her mother to nitpick something, saying that she looked like a golden pig or a crane in a dress. “Like a queen.” Rose raised her eyebrows in shock. That was probably the most positive thing she had said in weeks.

“Don’t mess up your makeup!” Her mother demanded, back to her old attitude again, nothing good could last for very long apparently.

“I could sit through a hurricane and my makeup wouldn’t even smear.”

“It’s almost time. I have guests to attend to, do not be caught off-guard.” Her mother demanded, “We have practiced this a hundred times, you would have to be an idiot to get something wrong.” Rose tried not to feel hurt from the comment.

“Thanks.” She grumbled.

“Do not miss your cue!”

“How would I miss it, Someone literally yells my name.”

“I’m sure you’d find a way.” And with that, her mother traded places with a guard in golden armor.

Rose closed her eyes to start the hour of meditation. Others in her place have claimed to see visions or deceased members of the royal family or even the sun herself. For the first half-hour, she just saw the back of her eyelids. Pure darkness. She had to let her mind wander or she would fall asleep or worse, get bored. She focused on the warmth of her magic through her veins, it was the warmest at her palms, like she was holding hands with someone. The comforting warmth combated the unnatural darkness around her.

After an eternity of all-encompassing silence, she heard a voice. It was quiet but in the impossibly silent room, it was as clear as day.

“You’re being wasted here.” the voice was deep and female. Blunt, like she was stating a fact. “They can’t help you. This place is killing you.”

Rose wanted to answer out loud but she knew the voice was in her head and she was acutely aware that she wasn’t alone in the room. She didn’t expect the things she would hear in there to be so… real.

“She’s suffocating you. You were meant to be free.”

‘I want to be free.’ Rose tried to manifest the pure yearning through her thoughts to whoever was speaking to her.

“You will be freed. Are you willing to pay the price?”

‘I’m going to be free if I have to do it myself. I’m sick of not having any control over my own life! I don’t care about your price.’ Anger started to bubble in her chest, the normal heat generated from her powers was amplified by the years and years of rage that had built up.

“I like you, princess,” The voice chuckled, “I feel like you’re going to be a great ally.”

Rose heard something beyond the voice, like in the world outside of her mind. She opened her eyes and the dark room was no longer dark in the slightest. Glowing gold and pink clouds swirled around her and she emitted a golden light from her skin and eyes. The guard was huddled in the corner with his eyes wide. He looked afraid. For some reason, this gave Rose a powerful sense of euphoria.

Unfortunately, as soon as she had realized her power around her, it started to regress. The swirling clouds started to slow and her skin started to fade. Not before the door opened though. The chamber’s main door opened to the ballroom, filled with every important fae in the Dawn and Dusk kingdoms. They all saw the thick clouds exit the room as she did and even more bazaar, she was smiling. Not like the polite smile she had practiced all her life but one of true genuine delight. Even her mother was staring.

Rose walked out of the dark room and to the balcony for all to see. The room was quiet. The music had stopped playing. Not out of respect but out of shock. After a long enough moment, someone very familiar spoke. The voice front the dark chamber.

“Now that was quite the entrance, Princess.” A fairy approached from the crowd dressed in black and green wearing a white mask that featured a long beak.

“What’s the meaning of this?” Rose's mother announced as she stood up from her golden throne.

“Don’t interrupt your majesty.” The strange fae spat. “I’m sure you’ll want to hear me out.” The queen managed to control herself and she sat back down. The dark room fairy waved her hand which caused a green intricate witches circle to appear at her feet and dark black clouds to swirl around it. Gasps erupted from the room. This wasn’t a fairy at all. A witch had snuck into one of the most important fae places. The natural enemies of the fairies were the magic folk and one had managed to slip into a major fae event.

The witch’s dark thunder clouds expanded throughout the massive room and her glamour faded. Her green butterfly wings turned into huge black feathered wings. Her curly brown hair cascaded off of her shoulders from their hiding spot and a black cloak waterfalled from her shoulders. A black staff topped in a birdlike skull appeared in her hands. Rose thought that she was so incredibly beautiful in the most unorthodox way.

“Relax relax,” The witch bellowed. “I’ve come bearing a gift for the princess. Better than any gift the fae could hope to offer her.” She disappeared in black smoke and appeared right next to Rose. But she wasn’t afraid in the slightest. Both the king and the queen stood abruptly at this action.

“I have a purpose for you. The lost Fae Princess needs to be found, and who better to find her than her sister! The caged bird will be trapped no longer.” The witch grinned. “Oh, and if you refuse-” she pointed her staff at the king and queen and they were covered in smoke. Once the smoke lifted it looked like nothing had changed but by the look on the monarch’s faces, something certainly had. “Your kingdom will remain unguarded and unprotected by the most powerful among you.” Surely enough, when Rose looked out the glass windows, the crystalline shielding around the palace was gone, without the shields, there was no night and day. Only the eternal light of the sun blazing onto the lands. “I’m sure my kind would be enthused to know of your newfound vulnerability.”

Rose stayed silent. She wasn’t afraid of the witch, she had been taught that the magic folk were wicked and scheming. But though the appearance of this witch was sinister and destructive, she was giving Rose exactly what she wanted under the guise of it being to lift a curse. She wasn’t just giving Rose a way out, but also a purpose, a quest, an adventure, a sister? Rose had only heard rumors of a lost princess but she thought they were just that, rumors. Like she was not her father's daughter despite having his white hair woven through the red she had inherited from her mother.

“You won’t even be alone on your journey. For a price, I will give you an object that summons me whenever you need me. I am nothing if not giving.”

“What kind of price?” Rose raised her eyebrow, speaking for the first time since the witch appeared.

“A small price for my help. All I ask for is a kiss.” The witch smirked, as if she didn’t expect Rose to take up the offer. The crowd had gasped, a kiss from a witch was said to be cursed. It was like signing a contract with the devil. But Rose didn’t need the promise of help from the woman, she would’ve kissed her anyway for freeing her.

“Deal.” The witch looked a little surprised but she laughed as all the onlookers looked horrified. Rose however was not remorseful in the slightest. The sooner she could leave her mother's presence, the better. Rose knew the corrupt nature of the fae more than anyone and she was sure that they wouldn’t even miss her.

“Wonderful. Now, you can’t go on a quest looking like that!” The witch spoke directly to her instead of projecting to fill the whole room. She gently lifted Rose’s chin with a dark claw-like finger and their lips met.

Around her, the decadent white gown started to get covered in smoke and changing dramatically. Rose felt the corset loosen and the skirt tighten and wrap around her legs to form pants. The smoke rose to her hair where the tight braids fell around her shoulders and unwove into freshly curled locks. She felt weight on her back of her small assortment of weapons that were forged by the fire giants for sunborn royalty. A sword with a golden hilt adorned with a triple set of feathered wings, a matching bow and a quiver full of arrows and a golden dagger to finish the set. Her heels were replaced with practical laced up boots that were a hundred times more comfortable. Even her makeup was affected. The layers and layers of powders and paints lifting in an instant leaving only the flaked remains of the sun imagery on her forehead and her golden lips.

Throughout her transformation, her lips were still firmly planted on the witches. She probably lingered for too long as the kiss made her heart flutter and she tried her best to preserve the feeling.

They parted, and the witch held out a dark metal object. A razor sharp knife with the imagery of a white bird skull carved to it’s hilt.

“Point it to the sky and say my name and I will come to you.” The witch assured.

“What is your name?” Rose took the knife and examined it before looking upwards at the witch.

“Adisa. Adisa Crow.”

#This is basically a first draft of a few scenes in my original series that im working on #at least the fantasy one #Rosalia Scarlett Dawn #Adisa Crow #Doctor Plague #my ocs #my writing #original writing #original content #original character #original characters #oc #ocs

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