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sinner-as-saint · 4 years ago

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I saw you and I knew.

Biker!Bucky x Reader AU

Run-through: You met Bucky unexpectedly at an unfamiliar bar one night - one of your last nights of freedom before your parents marry you off to some rich, young man. Bucky happened to be so different from all the men you had dated or you were used to seeing that it was a little bit of a surprise how reckless and open he was. You had been subconsciously looking for a way out of the situation you were in for days, so when Bucky makes you a rather unusual proposal; you accept immediately. And it ends up being one of the best things you ever agreed to.

Themes: smut, fluff,

a/n: remember this Bucky? Yeah, me too.

The moment you stepped into the bar, you felt all eyes on you.

Not in a bad way, more like in an intrigued way.

A couple of steps in and you realized why; there was no one but bikers in this club. Large, built, mean looking men. But judging by the sound of laughter and the bouncers scattered around the room, you felt oddly safe in the environment.

You went up to the counter and ordered yourself a drink. Once you found a seat in the less crowded area of the bar, you settled in next to the large window pane; looking out at the passing cars while sipping on your drink. The sun would set soon so the sky was all pink, and-

You felt a tap on your shoulder. “This seat taken?” A male voice spoke up behind you.

You placed your bottle down and turned to face him. You were aware that you did stare at him for a while. How could you not? Dark, slightly long hair, worn out leather jacket, and tattoos… a lot of them, peeking through his collar and around his wrists. And a perfect face. He gave you a slight smirk when he noticed that you were checking him out but you soon recovered, your heart racing.

“No, it’s not.” You gestured to the seat across from you, which he then walked over to.

You watched him, how he moved so confidently. You kept watching as he placed his own beer down, and took his leather jacket off to reveal a loose, ripped t-shirt underneath, as well as his muscular arms; one of them metal and glistening in the dimmed lights of the bar. He folded the jacket carelessly into a ball and placed it down on the table before taking a seat in front of you, leaning back and placing his muscular, tattooed arm over the seat of the booth. You noticed his pierced ears then.

It almost felt like a strip show. He had barely said enough to you and you were already feeling a little hot, with him staring at you.

“I’ve never seen you around here before.” He said, and something about his ease, and the softness of his tone, despite his rather mean and dangerous appearance, chased away the little bit of awkwardness which was forming in between you too. It soon vanished.

You licked your lips and answered, “It’s my first time here actually.” You gave him a polite smile which he returned, giving you the same look that everyone gave you for the first nanoseconds you walked in - an intrigued look.

He leaned forward, and gently toyed with your car keys laying on the table top. You got a whiff of his scent. You expected him to smell like cigarettes but he smelt like some fading, strong and expensive cologne. Very manly. “You’re a long way from home, aren’t you, Princess?”

You furrowed your eyebrows at him slightly, not minding the nickname. “How’d you know?”

He chuckled, and the sound echoed in your head. He sounded so boyish when he laughed, it warmed your heart for some reasons. Something about him screamed trouble, and recklessness and danger.

“You drive a Benz which no one here does, you’re drinking a martini while everyone is having cheap beers and you’re dressed like a classy lady in a place filled with leather and chains. So tell me, am I right?” He pointed out, his tone cocky and confident like one would expect.

You leaned back into your seat as well. “You’re judging me.” You pointed out. Funny, you thought you were somewhat blending in here with your little black dress - but clearly not.

He laughed again, making you crack a little smile. “Princess, look around. You don’t belong here. So tell me, what’s your story? How did you end up in a place like this?”

You sighed. “I was just… driving around, and I ran out of fuel not far from here. So I called for my chauffeur and didn’t want to wait by the side of the road until he arrived so I figured I could get a drink while waiting.”

He looked you dead in the eyes while you talked. Nodding at each bit of information. “I meant your real story, Princess. You drove a long way, why? I see it in your eyes. Something’s bothering you. What is it?”

He was reading you like you were his favorite book. And you found that quite… interesting because no one was ever able to do that normally. It felt intimate.

“And why should I tell you?”

“Because you want to. You need a friend, and I’m not half bad, am I?” Cocky, as expected.

You chuckled. “You won’t get it.”

He raised an eyebrow. A warning. “What is it? Your conservative and rich father won’t give you your pocket money in thousands this month?”

Despite the words, he managed to get yet another laugh out of you. “I earn my own money, thank you.”

“I’ll believe you. Then what is it? Your snobbish, rich playboy boyfriend is acting up?”

And yet another chuckle left your lips. “You seem to have issues with people who are well-off.”

He smirked. “Trust me, I don’t. I just want to figure you out.”

“Why?”

“Because your eyes are telling me that you’re sad. And that you’ve been contained for too long. You want to be freed. Am I wrong?”

Your lips parted at the accuracy of his words. “No, you’re not.” You lowered your eyes to the table, but he was quick to reach out with his metal arm and grab you gently by the chin. He tilted your head just enough so you could look at him.

“What is it, angel?” He asked softly.

“I… I don’t want to go home.” You whispered, your voice tired and low.

“Okay. Parents?” He spoke like he could relate.

You nodded and he gently let go of your face. “Parents.” You confirmed. “They want me to marry one of their friend’s son because according to them it’ll be good for the both of us. And you know, for each of the families’ businesses.”

He frowned. “You don’t like him, I assume.”

You sighed. “I don’t know him. He’s a good man according to my mother, who also hasn’t seen him since we were kids. Apparently I met him once or twice but I was too young back then to remember…” you sighed again, “It doesn’t matter anymore.” You shook your head, picking up your glass and taking yet another sip. “ Whoever he is, I can’t say no.”

He scoffed. “Yes you can.”

You chuckled, dryly. “You don’t understand. My dad will make my life a living hell if-,”

“Who cares what he thinks? He married the one he loved, didn’t he? Then why not let you find love on your own as well?” He did make sense.

You smiled sadly, thinking of your parents and their marriage. “I don’t think so.”

He stopped midway through picking his beer bottle up. “What?” he asked, then went back to picking it up again, bringing it to his pink lips.

“My dad. I don’t think he married out of love.” You let out a quiet scoff, “I don’t think my mom did either. They just realized that that would be the best for the both of them, I suppose. Now that I think about it, I don’t think they ever truly loved each other at any point.” You tilted your head while looking out at the passing cars out the window. “Mom always told me that marriage isn’t always about love, it’s about convenience.”

He let out a shameless chuckle. “I’m sorry, but what a bunch of bullshit! You believe her?” He asked in disbelief.

“It’s all I’ve ever been told all my life. Besides, I don’t have much of a choice anymore, might as well.”

He frowned at you, setting his bottle down to give you his full attention. “Come on, Princess. You can’t be serious. You can’t give up on love just because your parents did.”

That earned him a smile from you. “You sound like you know a lot about love.” You leaned forward, placing your elbow on the table, resting your chin on your fist. “It’s your turn, tell me, who has you under their unescapable love spell?” It was surprising how easy it was to talk to him. Almost felt like you had known him all your life.

He laughed again, that same boyish look on his face. “Nah, none of that. But I do know what it’s like to be contained, and I also know what it’s like to be finally free, with no worries about family pressure or expectations and let me tell you, Princess, it’s the best feeling in the world.”

That sounded exquisite. It sounded like… like everything you wanted right there and then. To not bother about what mom and dad might think and live for yourself for however long you wanted to.

“And what gives you that freedom? Riding down the highway at full speed on your mean bike?” You sassed.

You watched how his eyes lit up. “You’re right. And that’s exactly what you need, Princess. Come on, let’s go!”

Before you could process anything, he grabbed your hand and stood up. All you could do was quickly grab your purse and keys and you went along with him. You only realized what you were doing once you stepped outside.

“Wait! I- I…” You were stumbling over your words. A million thoughts rushing through your head all at once. And the piercing pair of blue eyes staring deep into yours weren’t helping at all.

He walked up to you. “It’s your life. They can’t tell you how to live it. You have every right to find love on your own, and if you don’t want to marry what’s his face then don’t. Parent or not, they can’t do that to you. Come on, let’s go before some old, broody chauffeur gets here.”

He tugged on your arm gently, walking towards the many bikes which were parked outside the bar.

“But, I- I’m supposed to leave tomorrow, to see the guy. I’m… I can’t just disappear. Where are we even going? I just met you and I- I don’t even know your name. Besides, you had alcohol. You can’t-,”

“Apple juice.” He stopped, and turned around to look at you. He repeated, “Apple juice. Don’t tell anyone.”

You looked at him like he was speaking another language. “What?”

“The bartender is a cool guy, I told him I don’t consume alcohol when I ride so he poured apple juice in beer bottles for me so that I can mingle with the crowd but also get home safe.” He explained.

You giggled uncontrollably at his answer and he lowered his blushing face. “That was funny, but I don’t believe you at all, I-,” you cut yourself off as you laughed; quite unladylike.

Without another word said, he circled his arm around you and pulled you into him, and his lips were on yours in less than a second. He kissed you deeply, thoroughly. Still gentle, but passionately. He held you by the neck with his metal hand and you melted in his embrace. You kissed him back and you heard a little moan escape his lips - sending shivers down your spine and making your heart flutter, and other places throb. He teased you by biting down on your lip, making you gasp as his tongue soothed it right after. He pulled you closer, pressing you against him even more, kissing you deeper if that was possible.

Your hands found themselves around his neck, your fingers sliding into his hair. He chuckled against your lips once he noticed that you were getting a little breathless. “Now tell me. What do I taste like, Princess?” He whispered against your lips, his voice sending shivers throughout your body.

Your face felt really hot at his question and only then did you realize that he did in fact taste tangy, and sweet. “Apple.”

He smiled against your lips before kissing you deeply again. “Told you. Now come on, trust me and let’s go. You can go home later tonight, or tomorrow morning. I’ll drop you wherever you wanna go. But right now, come with me.”

Fuck it.

“Yes.” You agreed. He gave you a big smile and tugged you along once again. You spoke up again. “And if you plan on killing me, just make it quick. Please. And don’t do weird things to me after I’m dead. Definitely do not feed me to animals, or humans for that matter. And don’t-”

He cut you off with another kiss once you reached his bike. “Shh.” He laughed. “I won’t do any of that. Now come on, put these on.” He handed you his jacket from earlier and a helmet.

You put those on quickly, not giving yourself the chance to overthink and prevent yourself from living a little. Once you climbed onto his bike, you realized that you would be pressed up against his back quite a bit. You didn’t mind it, it just made your heart race a little. His leather jacket felt nice and cool against your skin.

“Hold on tight, Princess. It won’t be that long of a ride. But it’ll be great, trust me.”

You nodded, and he chuckled at how adorable you looked with his huge, black helmet on. “Don’t kill us.”

“I won’t, angel.”

He kicked the engine to life. It roared so loudly that you couldn’t help but feel the adrenaline rush already. You giggled as he drove off, away from the pub, away from where you had left your car, away from where your chauffeur was supposed to pick you up. Away.

You felt the wind against your bare legs and parts of your face. Cold, rushing - making you forget. You wrapped your arms tight around his waist and tipped your head a little, looking up at the saturated, pink sky, the stars had started showing faintly and suddenly you realized how much of your life you had missed while chasing the dreams your parents had assigned you to chase.

Your friends would often talk of reckless nights back in university, but you never got to experience those because you were always busy studying to make sure your parents remained proud of you.

But you were now. You were on a mean bike with a drop dead gorgeous man, riding down the highway while the sun set in the background. You felt alive. Slowly, you loosened your arms from around his waist, lifting them away from his body. You lifted your arms upwards, feeling your hands tear through the icy winds and you let out a genuine laugh.

You noticed he slowed down a little when you did so. You let your arms up for some more time before you lowered them and wrapped them around his waist again. You inched closer and pressed your chest to his back, feeling his warmth seep through the many layers of clothing.

“Thank you.” You whispered close to his ear. You knew he heard you even if he didn’t respond right away.

“Wanna see the sunset better?” he asked, barely a second later.

“Yes, please!”

About ten minutes later, he pulled into the parking lot of what seemed like a motel. You got off the bike once he came to a stop and he did too. He helped you take the helmet off and immediately grabbed your hand and ran towards the motel.

You followed, giggling like a kid. “Where are we going?”

“The roof. Come on, quick.”

He answered and led both of you to what seemed to be some sort of fire escape. You climbed the metal stairs as fast as you could, not more than a few steps behind him until you reached the roof. It was filled with empty cans, cigarette butts and what not but it also gave you a view to die for.

The sky had turned orangish by now, the sun was halfway down the horizon and you were mesmerized. You couldn’t look away. The sky darkened with each second, and you felt too much at the same time. You wanted to run. And never come back. You wanted bike rides everyday. You wanted to take the time and admire each sunset like this. You wanted to not worry about anything for a while.

You felt strong arms wrap around you from behind. Then he placed his chin on your shoulder, pressing a sweet kiss to your cheek. “Don’t cry, angel.” Only then did you realize that you had a tear slowly falling down your cheek.

You wiped it away and kept staring at the sky, watched it change colors. Your racing heart calmed down and a certain body heat wrapped around you, comforting you better than any blanket ever could.

You turned in his arms, facing him once the sky turned a darker shade of blue when the sun had set completely. Another tear escaped your eye. He caught this one before it fell down your cheek. He looked down at you with a soft look in his eyes. It almost made your heart hurt.

“I don’t want to go home. I don’t want to marry him. I don’t want any of it.” You whispered, keeping your eyes on his neck, admiring his tattoos through your teary eyes. You couldn’t tell what they were just yet, but they looked incredible on his tan skin.

“Then don’t.” He answered, easily. “Don’t go home right away. Don’t marry him if you don’t want to. Stay.” He whispered the last bit, his metal arm reaching up to cup your face. “You might just be the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.”

You giggled through the tears. “So this is where you bring all the girls?” You asked, your tone much more playful and teasing.

He shook his head, laughing quietly. “I don’t. I don’t even live in this town. I have a family thing I need to attend in a day or two, so I was just passing by. I got a room for a couple of nights and boom, now here we are.”

You nodded slowly. “Here we are.” You whispered back, your eyes flicking down to his lips a couple of times before looking back up into his eyes.

He gave you a faint smile before leaning in for a kiss again, sighing once his lips touched yours like he had been craving it. You wrapped your arms around him, kissing him back. He kissed you recklessly, tugging and biting your lip, allowing his hands to slide up and down your side and he tilted your head to the side, stroking deeper into your mouth with his tongue.

“Let’s go.” He murmured against your lips before kissing them again.

“Where?”

“Downstairs.” He kissed along your jaw until his mouth reached your ear. He gave you a kiss and you visibly trembled in his arms. “It’s my turn to see what you taste like.” He whispered, blunt and hot.

Your face felt really hot, again. And when he pulled away, he had a handsome smirk on his pretty face. You got over the shyness and leaned in to kiss him again, aggressively. He chuckled into your mouth and pulled away before tugging you along as he took the stairs again, leading the two of you downstairs.

The night was properly dark by the time you got to the front of the motel, both of you unable to keep your hands off each other, stopping multiple times to push one another against the wall and make out like there’s no tomorrow.

There were not many people in sight. You could hear murmurs of muffled conversations coming from the restaurant which was attached to the motel, and a group of bikers were having a chat and smoking out in the parking lot but that was all.

He led you to his room, unlocked the door and pulled you inside, both of you giggling and moaning as you kissed like horny teenagers.

He pulled away again, “Oh and, my name’s Bucky. Remember that when you’re moaning later.” He whispered breathlessly against your lips as he slammed the door shut behind the two of you and wrapped his arms around you immediately, pulling you closer as though he needed you like he needed air.

“I’m Y/N. You remember that too.” You moaned into the kiss and shrugged his leather jacket off as quickly as possible, eager to feel his skin on yours. You helped him take his shirt off, tossing it aside carelessly. You briefly let your hands roam around his torso, feeling each indent and firm muscle, your heart racing with each inch of skin you explored.

He unzipped your dress while walking the two of you backwards, and by the time you made it to the queen sized bed you were both left in just your underwear.

Bucky pushed you down on the bed, it was surprisingly soft and comfortable. He was on top of you not even a second later. You whined when he moved to kiss down your neck, nibbling on your skin and leaving dark red marks behind. You wrapped your legs around him, moving your hips against him slowly, grinding on him out of desperation and he chuckled against your skin. “Eager, are we?” he whispered and peppered your neck with soft kisses.

You moaned when his hands reached up to wrap around your breasts, fondling and teasing you through the lacy bra. He moaned against your skin as your fingers slid through his hair and tugged at his roots.

“Bucky…” You dragged his name out, squirming under him as he took his sweet time kissing down your body.

“Hmm?” He acted oblivious as he took your underwear off and tossed them on the floor as he settled himself in between your legs properly. His handsome, perfect face just inches away from your dripping core.

You whined. “I want you, please…”

He chuckled, kissing your inner thighs. “I know, angel. I know.” His warm breath fanned your sensitive skin as he spoke, and he noticed the way the goosebumps erupted all over your skin. He looked up at you for a quick second, scanning your face.

You held your upper body up on your elbows by now, looking down at him with your bottom lip in between your teeth. He sent you a shameless wink before leaning in and kissing your wet folds, his tongue slowly circling around your throbbing clit and licking down, parting your wet folds with ease. He teased your entrance with his tongue and your body felt hotter than earlier.

A pressing need to release formed deep inside you as you felt his tongue stroked your most sensitive parts. “You taste better than I imagined…” Bucky chuckled as he looked up at you and found you with your eyes shut, head thrown back in pleasure.

He grinned to himself, glad that he was the one bringing you such pleasure. He wrapped his arms around your thighs, keeping you in place and close to him. He placed his mouth back on you again, and licked in between your wet folds, making you whine as he tasted you. His touch was slow, pleasurably agonizing. “Please…” you cried out, whimpering and begging.

“Oh?” He taunted. “But I’m not quite done, so don’t you come yet angel.” He whispered against your wet skin. He kissed down all the way to your core, and gently bit your skin, making you hiss in pleasure. You could feel your arousal trickling out of you, one drop at a time. But Bucky didn’t let none of it go to waste, he leaned in and latched his mouth onto your core, sucking and licking and teasing you. Your arousal coated the lower half of his face, but he didn’t mind it one bit.

He watched how you lost control under his touch; legs shaking as he teased your entrance with the tip of his tongue. His hands wrapped around your thighs, securing you in his grip as he pushed his face further into you, making you cry out loud. He had you coming undone all over his mouth in no time.

“That’s a good girl… cum for me, Princess.”

You were gasping for air in no time, your body squirming under his. Bucky kissed his way up your body again. He gave you a brief kiss on the lips then lifted off you for just a moment to get rid of his underwear and grab a condom from the drawer and put it on. Once done, he was hovering over your naked body again.

Bucky’s body settled in between your legs comfortably again, and he leaned in to kiss you on the nose and then down to your lips. You smiled through the kiss as he pulled you even closer. You could feel his thick and hard cock resting against your thighs. He touched you wherever he could; letting his hands linger at your breasts and taking his sweet time; caressing and kissing your skin. His hands slipped in between your legs with ease; caressing your inner thighs as he went.

You moaned into the kiss; his touch was slow, and gentle and enticing but also fiery. He ran his fingers up and down your folds, gathering and smearing your arousal around. He stared into your eyes, his face still dangerously close to yours. “You okay, angel?” he asked. His voice strained and deep, gravelly with lust.

“Yes… please, I need you.” You whispered against his mouth. You were burning up under him.

Bucky pushed his tongue into past your lips while he pushed his erected cock past your tight entrance. You immediately lifted your legs up to wrap them around his waist like earlier. You moaned quietly as he pushed into you. He grunted once he filled you up entirely, and gave you a couple of seconds to adjust. He grabbed both your hands, laced your fingers together with his and pinned your interlaced hands down on the bed, above your head.

He pulled out and pushed himself back into you, and watched in awe how you struggled to keep quiet. He lowered his face again, and leaned into your ear. “It’s okay, angel. Let me hear you.” He whispered, groaning by the end and let go of your hands to hold your body.

He gripped your waist and pushed deeper into you. You heard him gasp and swear under his breath as he rocked into you. Your nails sank into his skin, around his shoulders; which you held onto for dear life as he pounded into you. He kissed you, bit your lips, kissed your open mouth, and shoved his tongue past your lips while he rammed into you; and you never once complained.

Your legs trembled around his waist, he thrust deeper into you, and in the daze he was in, he mumbled right in your ear about how good you felt. The sound of his moans and grunts sent tingles dancing down your spine.

Never in a million years did you ever think that you would find yourself in a motel room, having mind blowing sex with a hottie you met about an hour ago, but here you were. And you loved each moment. Your back arched off the bed as you felt a familiar warmth washing over you. Bucky growled and bit down on your shoulder to keep himself from making any loud noises while he fucked you. He was relentless. And you loved it.

“Cum for me, angel. Come all over my cock…”

Your moans got louder as your walls clenched violently around him, your body shaking as the waves of pleasure washed over you. You gasped, trying to calm your racing heart but he wasn’t done with you yet. Bucky flipped you onto your stomach and pulled you onto your knees by your hips. He kissed the back of your neck.

“More.” He growled against your skin and pushed your face down against the pillows, making your ass stick out for him. He gripped each side of your hips, tightly. He pushed his cock into you without a word said; earning a sinful moan out of you. He groaned and grunted as he filled you up again; your butt cheeks pressing into his pelvic bone as he pounded into you.

You moaned out loud at the new sensation of him rocking into you from behind. Bucky’s hand found its way to your front and he pressed the palm of his hand against your lower abdomen. He liked the rush of excitement which coursed through him each time he felt his cock deep within you.

You felt him quicken his pace. “Fuck…” he moaned.

You tightened around him, and he groaned, pounding into you; growling and mumbling swear words under his breath. You felt the pressure in between your hips grow until you could barely hold back anymore. His other hand reached around and toyed with your folds; his fingers furiously rubbed the skin around your clit and made you tremble and whimper again.

“Bucky… please,” You moaned, craving more and more of him.

With a few more strokes of his thick cock, you felt his thrust becoming irregular, and felt his cock throb against your walls. You tightened around him, feeling the burning hot need to cum grow hotter and hotter inside you until it exploded. You came with a loud moan, gushing all around him. Bucky came right after you; buried deep within you – growling and mumbling swear words under his breath.

His soft kisses are the last thing you remember feeling before you snuggled up to his warm body under the sheets and drifted off to sleep without a single care in the world for the first time in a long time.

---

You laid your head on his bare chest, a thin white sheet barely covering either of you properly. The sun was coming up and you could tell that your phone would be blowing up by now if you hadn’t turned it off the night before. You quickly chased those thoughts away, you didn’t want to think about anyone this morning.

Just Bucky.

You lifted your head up slowly so as not to disturb him but when you looked up you found him staring down at you with a soft smile on his face. “Hi.” You whispered, your voice hoarse and strained.

He chuckled, pushing some of your hair out of your face. “Hey angel. Are you okay? Does anything hurt?” He asked, concern written all over his face for a moment.

You shook your head. “I’m okay.” You lowered your head again, placing your ear right on top of his heart. You let out a sigh. You knew you wouldn’t be able to escape your family forever and your father will track you down and you would have to explain yourself, possibly even marry whoever they ask you to but this right now, last night and this morning - you would cherish that forever.

You lazily ran your fingers up and down Bucky’s tattooed arm wishing for a different reality, while he played with your hair. You gently traced the lines and curves of ink on his skin, some were hard to decipher because they overlapped with the others. Some words you could make out, some you couldn’t. A few of the discreet, smaller tattoos looked like he had done them himself, and their messiness made you giggle. Like the poorly done smiley face on the inside of his wrist, and the fading initials next to them: j.b.b.

You froze. Hang on…

“Bucky?” You felt like you would explode with the amount of emotions and thoughts which rushed inside your head.

“Yes Princess?” You could hear the sleep in his voice.

“What’s your last name?” You asked, anticipation building inside of you and almost choking you. It couldn’t be… could it?

“Barnes. Why?” He answered, looking down at you with confusion all over his face meanwhile you looked like you had seen a ghost.

You closed your eyes and let out a shaky breath. “Let me guess, your real name is James. And your father has a very close friend and fellow businessman named Y/L/N?”

He furrowed his eyebrows at you. “Yes. How did you-,”

You got up and straddled him, pinning him down under you. He didn’t mind the nudity, quite the contrary actually. “Bucky! You’re the guy I’m supposed to marry! You’re James Buchanan Barnes!” You went on to tell him your full name and you watched how the realization hit him just as hard as it hit you.

“Oh…” His smirk faded for a moment as he processed what you had just said, before it formed again. “Well in that case…” He flipped the two of you around and pinned you down under him just like he had last night. “It’s nice to finally meet you, future wife.” He leaned in for another kiss.

#bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes smut #biker!bucky #bucky barnes au #bucky barnes

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falle-ness · 3 years ago

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I'm in the mood for philosophy and associations today. And you thought I'm just making gifs? Nah, I'm a pretentious fucker who loves adding the subtext and layers of meaning to everything.

Ressler is always pictured as someone who is essentially good, and whose strength comes from resisting the temptations.

“And lead us not to temptation but deliver us from evil...”

fits pre-Reddington Ress, and, well, Ress in general. Since that AA meeting in a church, I've headcanoned Ress as a strong believer in God (he never actually openly mentions it, so as I see it, his faith is a personal matter to him which is something I also relate to).

Ressler's relationships with Reddington and Henry/Mitchell are two turning points at which Ressler has been broken and reborn again to navigate through the gray world he's living in.

Mako Tanida episode can be considered a breaking point in between the two. Ressler is refusing to see the world in more shades of gray (pun not intended). But what happens next forces him to finally open his eyes and adjust his moral compass.

“Allies today, enemies tomorrow.”

Ressler has lost his best friend, and the love of his life. All because of a “fickle human nature”—greed. This episode proves Red isn't wrong to define our world as a complex and unpredictable.

Reddington and Ressler

Turning point one: Anslo Garrick

I see it as the only episode from the whole show where we've seen the real Ress behind his mask of tough and badass guy.

It's the only time he allows himself to be vulnerable, and though he's ashamed of it, ashamed of what Red will think of him, Red does what Ress doesn't expect—he accepts him. Regards him not as a [shitty] agent chasing him around, but as a worthy opponent, nemesis, and, finally—human being behind the [shield] badge and an allegiance to his Homeland. It's something Red understands and respects, once being such an ambitious, dedicated-to-the-cause-man himself.

I'm aware that not everyone will read into that, and that's fine; hell, it's pure speculation, even, but I've been sold onto that because of the acting. The chemistry and the subtext which has been born out of two equally gifted (*yes, for me James and Diego are equally talented though their methods of delivery are varied, yet together they complete each other) actors. Thanks to Diego's masterful acting which is slightly lost in the glory of James's, an attentive viewer can read it all in Ress' eyes—how his personal soul temple is in flames.

What makes this even more beautiful is the fact that Red has absolutely no reason to save him. None. He could've left him there to bleed out.

But he didn't.

A selfless act from a self-centered, violent man.

And it breaks Donald down.

Ressler is so proud, never asking for anything, never letting anyone to help, with “real men don't cry” attitude. Now—helpess like a child, his life depending on a criminal he's wasted his life chasing. It's a hard pill to swallow for such a man like Ressler.

“This criminal is saving my life, why, why he's doing it” conflict is growing into “why does he care?”.

Donald has no idea that Red also doesn't have a loving father, and that's why he knows what is going on in Ressler's heart.

Among many things he know, Red is aware of one thing Ressler, despite having a mother, is lacking—a father (guess how is it to grow up with a cop in a family and then lose him because of his job). A boy will always need a father; he'll seek his approval; he needs his acceptance—as a worthy man.

Red reads it in Ressler—because they're the same, two lonely boys deprived of father's love.

My dear comrade @yddraigwyllt once pointed out that the whole situation impacts Ress so much because Red takes Ress' father place (no, that doesn't impact me slash-shipping them, I have separate headcanons for that).

And all this time, since his father's death, Ressler—subconsciously—seeks for this love.

Hence the attitude, the desire to look tougher than he is. Basically, he's sublimating what he feels (and what he hadn't a chance to feel because his father was taken from him at the most tumultuous time of his youth) into his job—into Reddington. Reddington is a reminder of how his father's murderer got away (I disregard “Brothers” ep, sorry not sorry), and he's also an embodiment of everything Ressler loathes.

And this person, a stranger, and a criminal—the kind Ressler is taught to hate—not only offers him compassion he isn't supposed to have for the men like him, Ress; he comforts him at that moment—something a father would do for his child who is scared.

Finally, Red saves his life. Unconditionally. The way a parent would (or a lover, but that's up for interpretation).

What is interesting, Red doesn't mean to take Ressler's father place; it's just happens—it comes from Ressler, really.

The situation he's in brings him back into his childhood, to moments of loneliness; when he's helpless, incapable. Vulnerable. And the only person a kid can rely on at such moments of need, is their parent.

This is so psychologically loaded, and I'm not sure the writers have even thought about it. It's all Diego and James. And I have no idea whether it was on purpose or they just went with the flow and added that subconsciously.

With Red and Ressler's backgrounds in mind, their scenes become even more poignant.

We all know what happens next—Red shows that he can take as much as he can give. It adds more layers to their interaction and, ultimately, connection.

This is right here is why I love them so much: Red leaves in Ress not only his blood, but something a far more dangerous—doubt. Even a seed of doubt is enough to sow confusion and lead the saint astray. At the same time, if handled right, doubt can be helpful—

how does one go through life not questioning it?

Isn't it something a parent does?

And don't get me started on what happened in Mako Tanida. That was as personal as burning someone alive—only to protect the person you care for.

Ressler and Prescott

Turning point two: Laurel Hitchin and Henry Prescott

Let's fast forward to Henry Prescott.

Since I've started actually slash-shipping him and Don, I've reevaluated my opinion about Henry/Mitchell. Without my dear comrades, @randomprivateer and @yddraigwyllt I'd be the same pilot Ressler who sees the world one-way :)

First and foremost, an uncomfortable, but necessary truth—Ressler should've could've confessed and go to Cooper either the moment he kills Hitchin (the way he did it is something for another day; however, again, my dear comrade @yddraigwyllt once hinted at a very peculiar way Diego acted it, and the possible subtext behind his gestures and attitude, which brings a whole lot of questions and headcanons) or the moment Henry reaches out.

But Ress doesn't.

If we bounce back to the religious court, this can be interpreted as following: Henry is the “temptation”, the Snake in the garden. Red (I'd say it's not a stretch to take him as the God within the criminal world), or a God, is usually the one holding an apple of Truth, and as I see it, has all the answers Ressler wants. So he becomes a protector, a guide and mentor for Ressler whom he senses to have had lost his way.

*Tbh, I'm not quite sure how I feel about Red burning Mitch alive because... Hell, on one hand, it's an overkill, and as a resslington shipper I'm glad he did it, but... On the other hand, it's very, very, VERY personal (and we all know how personal Red gets in his revenge when someone he loves and cares for is hurt), and the only possible explanation for that could be that Red, er, was jealous. Yes, jealous as “in love” and “hurt by Ress choosing another”. Yes, you read it right. He was jealous of Henry. Not gonna elaborate. Try rewatching the Informant now, ahaha.

I couldn't understand it earlier, and thought Red is actually enjoying watching Ress suffer.

*tbh, a part of me hates Red for not helping him and considers Red a heartless motherfucker for breaking Ressler that much just to see if he can survive it, and I'm overall FUCK YOU RED FUCK FUCK FUCK YOU YOU FUCKING PRICK mood regarding this, but I digress

If I look at it through these lenses, it makes sense: one can't learn to swim without almost drowning at least once. Yes, it was cruel of Red to watch and not interfere the moment he knew—and he knew, that fucking bastard knew—Ressler is in too deep. And instead of forbidding him, Red watched—cautiously—whether or not Ressler can get out.

Tough [father's] love, huh?

The nature of Ress/Henry in-canon relationship is twisted. But is it, though? Yeah, Ress suffers, yeah, it's blackmail, but at the same time (and I had to accept it, even if at first I was totally on Ressler's side because I cared for him more), it's a fair (almost) trade.

Prescott does his job, and does it perfectly. Conscience isn't his problem. And, well, one could assume Ressler knew the conditions under which Henry operates since Red knows those—unless he specifically wouldn't share that.

Which, I think, is a blop from the writers—Red couldn't have predicted that Ressler would kill Hitchin. In any case, him not telling Ressler the whole truth how Prescott operates and watching Ressler doing his bidding while savoring a glass of wine, is... disturbing. Problematic content™ at its finest. But we love it in this house.

On the contrary, even if Ress didn't expect he would be asked to do something in return when already paid the money, it was naive to believe that someone from Red's world won't try to use an FBI agent. Donald probably thought he was protected by the alias Red's given him and the overall Concierge of Crime association (like a son protected by his father).

Truth is, Donald had underestimated Prescott—just like he underestimated Red, relying only on the image made up from investigations, photos, crimes.

Or first impression—don't forget, Prescott reluctantly assisted Red in his endeavors to help Ressler out, and this might have led Ress to perceiving Henry as some small fish in this business. While in fact, as it turned out, Henry and those like him, are essential to any criminal.

Donald had missed a person behind the image, behind the mask. Twice already—same with Red, too.

As a shipper, I'd say Henry considered Donald as a personal challenge in his line of work—never hurts to have a pet FBI agent on a retainer. A very stubborn agent, yet obedient and thorough nonetheless.

One could argue that Prescott pulls a carpet from under Ressler, but now I see that it's not really that. It's a sad truth, but Ressler brought this on himself.

He got scared. He got so terrified that his first thought was to call someone who doesn't know him at all. Someone who won't ask questions. Someone who, despite being a witness to his shame and guilt, won't act on it—or so he hopes in the hot moment, forgetting that Prescott will cost him more than just money.

Does it make Don a coward? Maybe. Probably, even. Either way, he's nothing without his job, it's the only thing which pulls him through all the shit he's been subjected to. And him doing anything to keep it is justifiable—at least, in my eyes. Yes, he mostly did it out of selfish reasons—he didn't care how many innocent lives he'd save if he's gonna get his job back. He just wanted “himself” back, his identity. He didn't want to become someone like those he's been hunting. Someone similar to the man his father was murdered by—which is something he keeps carrying with himself all this time.

It's a testament of how much more darkness Ress is hiding within himself. And that he constantly tries to fight it—that's why he knows exactly at what dark impulses Dr. Thrall is hinting at. Because he's felt them too.

He acknowledges them with conversation with Red earlier—both times he almost let those impulses guide him, lets the dark consume him, and both times Red was there for him. Yes, yes, we know Red said, “I did it for myself”, and all that. Again, truth is, there was no reason for him to save Ress (again)—TF wouldn't have been disbanded because of one agent. Yes, they'd be investigated, but only Ressler would have gone down. Red didn't need Ressler at all—another agent could have been on the TF, and things went on.

The doubt which was clawing at Donald since Anslo had found its way to him—Donald, blinded by his ambition, made a deal. Not with the devil, but close to that. He probably told himself it's a lesser of two evils.

And that's where the doubt given to him by Red comes into play.

One could think that from Mako Tanida Ressler had come out less damaged since Red took half of his guilt in a way; I'd like to think it was Red's attempt to help Ress to escape that self-destructive route he's well aware of (we know Don hadn't).

The doubt about what the world really is. About his place in it. About what's right and what's wrong. About crossing lines. About price and worth of one's oaths.

This doubt leads him to stay and do Prescott's bidding and regard himself as low as possible. With no possibility of making amends and getting absolution. In a way, Red becomes Ressler's priest who has forgiven him his sins. I find it symbolic, given how much Don places in faith and God.

Resslington vs Pressler

These two relationships, Red/Ress, Ress/Henry are both twisted in their nature, yet different in aftermath.

Red/Ress is about the disruptive influence, widening one's horizons beyond the frame of the precise black-and-white world; it's learning to embrace yourself as a whole and undivided. Embrace your identity.

Accepting faults, flaws, and dark impulses.

At times, there's no choice left but to lean to and embrace the dark impulses. Govern them, keep on a loose leash, but a leash nonetheless.

It's also about the ability to pierce into yourself, into the abyss of your soul. And be at peace with all you find there, both good and bad.

Darkness doesn't exist without light, and light—without darkness. Silhouettes in darkness are deceiving; the light is the truth, nothing escapes it.

And, of course, it's about the consequences to one's actions.

And—which is no surprise to realize after seeing the same already with Red/Ressler—it also teaches one to be aware of the price to pay for whatever choice they make.

Ress/Henry may be destructive in its nature, but after given it some thought, I'm associating the aftermath from it as the one from an arson.

It peels away the unnecessary, leaving raw remntants of one's soul. Often—ugly and repelling, the ones we don't show to anyone.

It's a pensive, unbiased look under a magnifying glass at everything one's hiding, everything one's terrified of.

Big thanks to my comrades, @randomprivateer and @yddraigwyllt.

Shoutout to my resslington fellas, @glowstar826, @cesar-hoe, and @bi-ressler.

This long-ass essay is inspired by @kiss-my-freckle posts about TBL.

#the blacklist #donald ressler #raymond reddington #henry prescott #meta #my posts

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thefanficmonster · 3 years ago

Text

Best Friend’s Brother

Conrad (The Dark Pictures Anthology: Man of Medan) x Reader (Male)

Warnings: Swearing

Genre: Fluff, Mild Angst

Summary: Having been invited to the boat trip by his best friend Julia, Y/N can’t help but wish he never accepted the invitation because now he has to deal with being stuck on a boat with the boy he’s had a crush on for years with no real way to avoid him.

Requested by @dark-pictures-until-dawn Hi hun! Thank you so much for your request, sorry to have kept you waiting for so long but here it finally is and I really hope you enjoy the read! (I used he/him pronouns but if you want them changed feel free to let me know!) Love, Vy ❤

I have no idea what I was thinking when I agreed to go on this trip. I don’t know what on God’s green Earth I was thinking but here we are now sitting on a boat, at open water with no land for miles. And I’m sitting here, face to face with him, but I’m completely frozen. Unable to say a single damn thing. Maybe that’s a good thing though, I’d probably embarrass myself if I did say something.

Let me give you a bit of backstory to how I found myself in this situation.

My parents are very close to Julia and Conrad’s family, given that our mothers used to go to high school together and have remained best friends ever since. That’s how I met the two siblings and was quick to grow a friendship with them both. Despite being Julia’s age, I found myself always gravitating towards Conrad but the girl is still my best friend - she’d probably kill me if I let her brother take that title from her. Truth be told, he could never take her title - I could never see Conrad as a best friend.

Not when my feelings towards him are anything but platonic.

No, I did not tell Julia about said feelings and no I don’t plan on telling her either. I’d never hear the end of it if I did tell her about it. She’d chew me up about it, making my romantic interest for her brother the main topic of discussion (read: teasing and mocking). Don’t get me wrong, I love Julia to death and there are never any secrets between us.

Well, there weren’t any until a few years ago when I realized my fondness for the dumbass she calls brother goes beyond just friendship and similarity. That it had more of a romantic nature that I was not prepared to have to deal with. And, in all honesty, I don’t think I’ve dealt with at all even now. I mean, it’s probably obvious thanks to the silence that’s taken over the deck of the boat where I’m currently sitting with Conrad, monitoring Alex and Julia’s dive while Fliss is tending to a seasick Brad downstairs.

“Hey Y/N, want a beer?“ When the comfortable but odd silence is broken, no one would be shocked to find it out it was done so by Conrad. I’m surprised he even managed to stay silent for so long.

“No thanks, I’ll keep the alcohol at bay until tonight when everyone’s onboard.“ It’s not a complete lie, that’s what I like about it.

You see, I’ve never got drunk with Conrad in the vicinity and I don’t wanna risk my drunk ass outing me and my silly and have neither him nor I remember it the next morning. So, to avoid getting carried with the drinking, I won’t be starting now and I’ll make sure to limit myself even tonight to three beers tops. I’m no lightweight but I’m no daredevil either.

“You’re oddly quiet.“ Conrad says when he returns with a beer in his hand, the glass bottle stained with droplets, suggesting he’s just taken it out of one of the coolers we brought. He presses the bottle to the side of his neck where he got a sunburn yesterday, some droplets trickling down his skin. He doesn’t seem to mind it as he keeps his focused gaze on me, a mildly concerned frown upon his face as he studies my expression, “Something wrong? You know you can tell me anything. That’s what best friends are for, after all.“ He smirks, putting extra emphasis on the word ‘best‘.

I laugh but I cringe inwardly. Something about calling him ‘best friend’ feels so unnatural and odd and out-of-place I can’t even describe it. I know it may sound ridiculous but if you’ve ever had a crush there’s a high chance that you can relate. “Don’t worry, if it were worth mentioning, I’d tell you.“ I blow off his concerns, using his own method against him.

He’s known to do that - sweep all his troubles under the rug and stand atop it to make sure they don’t try to escape and resurface while he’s keeping his bright smile on his face, avoiding showing any other expression. I’m no fool and neither is no one around him, at least the ones who know him well and are close to him. Us who he considers friends know that it’s not all smiles and sunshine in his life either.

Wish I could pull that rug from under him and see what’s really going on with him but not even Julia is allowed to do so, let alone me.

Thankfully though, before things could get any more awkward, Julia and Alex resurface with some rather exciting news - they went in as boyfriend and girlfriend and came back as an engaged couple.

And just like that, all thoughts surrounding Conrad were thrown out of my head. Ok, maybe not completely, but they were suppressed into some dark corner of my brain.

* * *

“You’ve got Connie worried.“ I yelp when my best friend plops her ass down next to me on the deck, her second bottle of beer half empty by now while I’m still nursing my first as though I’m trying to save more beers for the rest of the people on board. We already have plenty of beers in stock but even if we didn’t, considering the sickness he had to endure earlier, Brad isn’t drinking, leaving his share at our disposal. Therefore, Jules is quick to catch onto my slow drinking.

I tilt my bottle in her direction, “I want to avoid getting sick like Brad did, thank you very much. The last thing I’m looking forward to is kneeling by the edge of the boat, puking my guts out.“

Julia laughs, clinking her bottle against mine before taking a swig. I take one too, hoping it fuels my courage at least a tiny bit to try and lead this conversation properly, “Nah, that’s not what he meant - although, I doubt Brad’s sickness was an alcohol issue.” She shakes her head, pushing aside a few blond locks to be able to look at me better. That’s when I feel like her gaze is piercing into my soul and I wish I knew how to shield myself from that. There’s a big issue with having your crush’s sister be your best friend, especially when she has a sixth sense for when there’s something off with me. “But you have been avoiding him, don’t deny it.” My eyes widen against my will and my mouth falls open as I try to defend myself and deflect her argument, but she raises a finger to signal me to keep my thoughts to myself while she’s talking. “Did he say something inappropriate while we were gone? Just tell me, I’ll end him!”

“Relax, Jules, Conrad would never do such a thing. Especially not with someone he cares about.“ Alex interferes - God bless his soul - and takes a seat next to Julia, wrapping an arm around her shoulders.

“I’ve known Connie for as long as I’ve known you, J. You should know by now that, even at the odd chance he does say something inappropriate, I have a reply ready at all times.“ I shoot her a wink in an attempt to wipe away the concerned expression on her face.

Alex contributes, “See? Nothing to worry about. Now let Y/N enjoy his beer and you enjoy yours.”

I shoot Alex a grateful smile over behind Julia’s back, subtly tilting my bottle towards him - a gesture he understands perfectly and does so in return. However, his fiancée refuses to give up the argument.

“No, no, no. There is definitely something to worry about and I’ll get it out of him if it’s the last thing I ever do.“ She narrows her eyes at me, forcing me to instinctively back away as if that’s gonna help me at all. Then, this woman pulls a 180 on me, going from an angry detective to a disappointed and betrayed friend, “Damn it, Y/N! I always tell you everything and you are just a closed book! How is that fair?!“

It may or may not be a tactic but she’s got a point - I rarely tell her things. I’m the listener of the duo and she’s the talker: she shares, I absorb the info; she’s upset, I listen and comfort her accordingly; she has something troubling her, I’m the one she shares it with. It’s rarely ever the other way around. And I can see why it bothers her.

What’s a little truth to pay her back for all the ones she’s told me? Well, the problem is that this particular truth is far from little and it would be the equivalent of descending into my own grave willingly.

It could also help you, you know?

Yeah, sure it can. Sure it can....

“Ok fine!“ I cut her off because this woman can never run out of words to use against me when she wants to.

Her fiancée is quick to give me a sympathizing look, “No, Y/N, you don’t have to...”

“No, it’s ok, Alex. I owe her this much...“ I sigh, looking at the doorway leading to the lower level of the boat where Conrad went a while ago and doesn’t seem like he’s in a hurry to return, much to my relief. I sigh, succumbing to the inevitable, “Jules, I’m only gonna say this once and no, I won’t elaborate but I need you to promise me you won’t freak the hell out. Got it?“

The blond girl rolls her eyes, “Come on Y/N, are we in middle school or something?”

Oh she’s so not ready to hear this...

“Fine, then I bet you won’t be bothered by my crush on your brother at all.“ I huff out before I can rethink the words I’d use or how I’d phrase the sentence. It just left my body as though it has been waiting to do so for a while no. That wouldn’t surprise me though, it’s been one heavy weight to carry around.

There’s a long moment of silence. Alex and I both gaze at Julia who is pulling off the most impressive poker face I’ve ever seen but I have no time to dwell on that considering I’m too busy keeping my stomach from turning completely and forcing me to throw up the small amount of food I’ve eaten and the beer I’ve had to drink. When Julia opens her mouth to talk, I raise the bottle to my lips to shut myself up and calm myself down. “The only thing that bothers me is the fact you didn’t tell me sooner.“

To say I’m flabbergasted would be an understatement. I’ve seen Julia freak out over smaller things but she’s calm about this?! I’m impressed. But then again, I shouldn’t speak too soon - this might just be the calm before the storm.

“If I knew you’d be this chill about it I wouldn’t have waited so long.“ I admit sheepishly, fidgeting with my hands now that I’ve put the bottle aside. “It’s unlike you to be this calm about something....like this.“ I cannot find the right words to describe ‘this‘ but I know she gets me and that’s a relief.

“I’m a drama queen when I wanna be and a strategic player when I have to be, Y/N, how come you don’t know that?“ She smirks at me, all self-assured and whatnot. Wish I had at least a fragment of her self-esteem. “Speaking of strategic, leave it all to me. The two of you will be together in no time.“ She nudges me in the ribs with her elbow, giving me a wink that makes my blood run cold, my eyes opening wide as plates.

“No way, J! No fucking way.“ I feverously shake my head, the idea itself making me feel so terrified and unsure like I’ve never felt before. “You won’t do anything just like I won’t do anything. He doesn’t see me that way and that’s that, no room for negotiating.“

She scoffs, “Oh please. Have you known him all his life? Have you seen him through every darn moment of his life - from being a pathetic loser in middle school to the playboy in high school? No you haven’t. Well, I have and I can say with all the certainty within me that the way he looks at you is a dead giveaway of how he feels for you. He’s had many romantic partners, and I’ve never once seen him look at them the way he looks at you, Y/N.”

I narrow my eyes at her, “You do realize you’re contradicting your own point here - he’s never looked at me the way he looks at his romantic partners means he’s never seen me as a romantic partner!”

Julia shakes her head, “Goddammit, Y/N, you’re really trying to explain my brother to me? I’m telling you, the look he gives you is a lot more meaningful, a lot more special, unlike any look he’s ever given anyone.” The girl scans my face, looking for something I’m not sure she’ll find. “He adores you, Y/N. Perhaps even more than you.”

The words have no time to sink in an be processed by my spasming brain when I hear a familiar voice come from my right, “Wait, what?! What did I miss?”

If Conrad doesn’t have the best timing ever, I don’t know who does...

“Oh dear brother, we’ve been missing out on A LOT.“ Julia says, using every bit of insinuation she can to get me on-edge.

Conrad’s confused gaze darts between the three of us: Alex, who’s still in the processing phase, Julia who’s smiling widely and me who’s downright terrified. I now wish I had another beer bottle handy. It’d keep me occupied if nothing else.

Suddenly, the engaged couple arise from their seats and begin walking away - not without Julia flashing Conrad and I a big grin that says ‘Have fun, you two!’ as though she doesn’t know how much I’m sweating right now.

Conrad however doesn’t seem to notice the teasing undertones as he takes the seat opposite me, tightly holding onto his beer bottle when his gaze meets mine. There’s a smirk on his face but I don’t see even a trace of it in his eyes, leading me to believe it’s ingenuine and forced which is something I never thought I’d see on Connie’s face - a fake smile. It’s almost disturbing to witness.

“Well, well, well, has our boy scout found himself a significant other? Sorry if I’m far from the mark, I’m just shooting in the dark here. I didn’t get to hear much so I might be really inaccurate.“

I shake my head, “No, no, you’re pretty close actually.“ I was prepared to deny it to my grave but here I am confessing like a fool, “It’s a potential significant other. To be fair, there’s no potential whatsoever but a boy can dream.“

He quirks up a curious brow, “Why’d you be so sure?”

Well fuck, I didn’t think it that far through.

I attempt to play it off cool, shrugging my shoulder nonchalantly, “I’m not his type at all. I just know he doesn’t see me the way I see him. Hell, I’m not even sure he’s into guys and even....“

Conrad doesn’t let me finish though, shutting my up with his lips pressed against mine. I can’t recall when he closed the distance between us, I can’t even remember seeing him get up from his spot on the bench. Were my eyes closed? I have no clue, all I know is that they’re shut now and I’m afraid that this will all turn out to be a dream if I open them.

Therefore, I keep them shut even after we pull away, our faces still remaining inches away from one another.

“You still think he doesn’t like guys?“ The cocky fucker asks in a mumble, chuckling slightly.

I should probably feel timid, embarrassed or nervous or anything else that would fit well in this situation but all I feel is relief and all I can do is tilt my head back and laugh my heart out at the one thought that pops into my head:

I may have been the last person to know I had a crush on Conrad

Connie doesn’t allow me to spiral any further. He instead takes a gentle hold of the back of my neck, bringing me in for another kiss.

Man, is our story a cliché though - the story of how a dumbass (me) fell in love with his best friend’s brother.

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petersasteria · 4 years ago

Text

Love Documentary - Harry Holland

Harry || Main || Taglist

Pairing: Harry x Reader

Requested? Nah.

3,470 words

TW; one mention of death, heartbreaking

* * * *

“Hi everyone! I’m Harry Holland and what you’re about to see, are short interviews that I did with people as I ask about what great love really is. Sit back, relax, and enjoy this love-filled journey.”

“Are you ready?” Harry asked and the old couple looked at him and nodded with a smile. Harry smiled too and started filming them. “So, how did you two meet?”

“We were childhood best friends.” The old man smiled as he reminisced the early days of his childhood. “I was a hopeless romantic and she wasn’t, but it all worked out in the end.”

“He was really cheesy.” The old man’s wife added with a laugh, causing Harry to laugh too. “He recited lines from movies just to get me to be with him. It was like he knew that we’d end up together.”

“Did the lines work?” Harry asked.

“They didn’t, but look where we are now.” The old lady smiled at her husband.

“We’ve been married for 60 years.” The old man proudly said.

“Are you each other’s greatest love?” Harry asked.

“I’d say we are.” The old man responded as the old lady nodded in agreement.

“We are.”

“So, for you, what is great love?” Harry asked. That was the important question. He needed that to be answered.

“Great love is loving someone unconditionally. No matter what happens between the two of you, you’ll still love them.” The old lady answered. “Right?” She looked at her husband.

“Right.”

Harry sits behind the camera as he watches the old man sit comfortably in his seat. The old man nods at Harry, signaling that he’s ready to be interviewed. Harry smiled softly and started recording.

“Please tell me your name, sir.”

“My name is Henry and I’m 82 years old.” Henry, the old man, said. Harry nodded before looking down on his notebook to write Henry’s name and age. After doing so, he read the question that he wrote there earlier.

“Who is your great love?” Harry asked.

“That’s easy; it’s my wife.” Henry answered with a sweet smile. “She’s the loveliest person you’ll ever meet and she makes the most delicious pancakes from scratch.”

“She sounds lovely.” Harry smiled. “How long have you two been married?”

“55 years this year, but this will be the first time I’ll be celebrating without her. She passed away.” Henry shared. The sadness was evident in his eyes and it made Harry sad.

“How did you two meet?”

“We met at a car repair shop. She was the mechanic and I was there getting my car fixed. She was the only girl I’ve ever been with and I have no regrets. Everyday, she loved me like there was no tomorrow. No one’s ever loved me like that and I will forever yearn for it.” Henry said, not bothering to wipe the tears streaming down his face.

“And, what’s great love for you?” Harry asked.

“For me, great love is being an all in one person for your one and only person. You’re the best friend, the sidekick, the lover; everything. When you meet your great love, you wouldn’t find anyone else.” Henry answered.

“Hi! I’m Harry Holland and I’m just popping in to say that the elderly know so much about great love. So, I asked the youth what they think is great love.”

For you, what is great love?

“I’m Amaranthine LaSpina and I’m 21 years old. They say that great love is what Jesus did for us, but I don’t know about that since I don’t believe in things like that. But in my opinion, great love doesn’t necessarily mean ‘romantic love’. It can take on many forms like friendship, family, etc. The constant factor is that they are people who care for you regardless of the decisions you made and will make. They offer you their full opinions without bias, and still support you even though you go on a different path. In summary, they want what they think is best for you without being control freaks.”

“Hiii, I’m Jaemren and I’m 15 years old. For me, great love means having an instinct, of some sort, to treat someone as part of your family even though you’re in a relationship with them or if they’re just a friend or if they’re an artist who doesn’t know you exist. You will have the sudden urge to protect them at all cost because you don’t want them to get hurt. Because if they get hurt, you feel their pain; you feel like you’re getting hurt too. Of course, you will correct them when they’re wrong and you’ll be comfortable around them because you feel at home when you’re with them, y’know? Like, there’s warmth. Great love is treasuring someone you don’t want to lose in your life and in terms of feeling it, I think reassurance is the best way.”

“Betty Montefalco, here! I’m 20 years old now and great love will always be there. It’ll always fight for you- in fact, it never slept without an argument. It’s great, it’s explosive, it’s annihilating, it could be exhausting, but at the end of the day- it’s what you want and it’s what you go back to. Even when you’re not in that headspace or happenstance anymore, it’s yearning for someone for the rest of your life; consciously, subconsciously, or unconsciously. If you’re lucky enough, maybe you’ll get to see the greatness endure and eventually flourish in this lifetime. If not, I believe you get to have that love elsewhere. Maybe in another lifetime or in a mirrored universe. I believe the people we yearn for were put in our lives for a reason and none of these people go to waste. I try to remind myself that everyday and that not everything’s figured out yet.”

“I’m Lucas and I’m 18 years old. For me, great love just boils down to understanding a person to the deepest level. It doesn’t even need to be exclusive to a romantic kind of love. True love, for me, is knowing the person in every situation. I don’t mean that the person knows your favorites or knows your deepest, darkest secrets. Knowing the person in every situation is knowing how to talk to you in times of your happiness, knowing how to keep you happy, and knowing how to be there for you in tough times without being intrusive or anything. They can sense when something is wrong about you or if you’re feeling off and they really know how to help you. They don’t even need to be your lovers or even best friends. It takes a certain kind of empathy to be able to understand someone’s emotion so well and knowing how to help you with those emotions is what I believe to be the greatest kind of love one can show to another.”

“HAHAHA, great love??? I haven’t experienced that yet. I only have my firsts, but I don’t consider them my great loves. My expectation is that hopefully we’re in the same wavelength-ish. To me, it doesn’t matter how they will be. Hopefully no sacrifices will be made. You can get great love from your friends and family. Like, you do stuff for them just because you love them. Oh, I’m 21 years old and my name is Hebe. It’s pronounced like ‘Phoebe’.”

“I’m Alessandra; 21 years old. Honestly, I don’t know what great love is. But I guess it’s something that makes someone’s world meaningful. Crushes come and go, but great love stays.”

“I’m 18 years old and my name is Dash. Great love is where you can experience the good and bad without ever getting tired nor ever get sick of the person. It’s trusting the person who you experience great love with.”

“I’m Jai and I’m 18 years old. Greatest love. As someone who ceases to exist, but lives by the quote ‘we accept the love we think we deserve’, I definitely have no idea what love truly is. In the first place, we shouldn’t even be rationalizing what it is. I once told a friend that I never believed in love. I was teased about it, but sometimes I just want someone to take me in their tender arms and cover me in dirt, cover me in roses. As gravity pulls me in their arms; I’ll feel warmth, I’ll feel safe, I’ll feel at home. Oh, to have someone be the mark of who I need to be, to have a blossoming reverie with, like the way they came in my life would feel so right. I think greatest love would make me want to twist and turn, cry and burn, but I’d like it.”

Harry sat in his room editing his ‘great love documentary’ and he’s frustrated. He couldn’t feel a thing from it. He felt as if he’s lacking some kind of passion, but he doesn’t know what it is; he can’t put his finger on it. So, he saved the video and went to the kitchen to fix himself a sandwich. While doing so, he took out his phone and called his mum.

“Harry!” Nikki happily said through the phone. “How are you?”

“I’m alright. ‘M just a bit stressed, that’s all. You?” Harry asked before putting his mum on speaker, so he can decently make a sandwich.

“I’m alright. I’m just editing pictures. How’s the documentary coming along? Is it like you pictured in your head?” Nikki asked.

“Yeah, it’s alright. It’s not finished, but it’s all coming together. The documentary isn’t the problem, though. It’s me. I feel like something’s lacking in me. Like, I don’t feel a thing while asking those ‘for you, what is great love?’ questions. When I asked old couples, I didn’t feel my heart swelling with joy and love. Is something wrong with me?” Harry explained.

“No, there’s nothing wrong with you.”

“Then, what is it? I want this documentary to work, I really do. I just want to be a great director. Not just for this project, but also in projects that I’ll do in the future. But I can’t do that if my feelings aren’t in the right mood or place. Am I making any sense, mum?” Harry sighed before taking a bite out of his sandwich.

Nikki laughed, “I definitely know what you’re talking about. Harry, darling, you’re not inspired. That’s it. You’re doing a documentary about ‘great love’, but you don’t have one yourself.”

“Do I have to find someone as soon as possible?” Harry asked. “I don’t want to put this documentary on hold.”

“You don’t have to find someone as soon as possible and you don’t have to put your documentary on hold. You’ll find someone along the way, I promise you that. Just do what you have to do.”

“How do I know if I meet the right one?”

“You’ll just know. Trust me.”

Harry sighed, “Okay. Thanks, mum.”

“You’re welcome. I love you.”

“I love you too.” Harry hung up and finished his sandwich before going back to his room to continue editing.

Harry took his time with the documentary. He needed the inspiration to continue, so he took a break from it. He was in the neighborhood with a small ball in his hand as he walked Tessa for a little bit of exercise. That’s when he saw you. You were painting a piece of cardboard as you sat on the grass. Your eyebrows were knit as you concentrated on what you were doing. He walked up to where you were and stood next to you. He removed the leash from Tessa’s collar and threw the ball. Tessa immediately ran off to find the ball and Harry finally gave you his attention.

You felt his presence next to you, but you didn’t mind him. After all, he was a stranger.

“Um, hi!” Harry spoke, causing you to look up from painting. You gave him a tight-lipped smile and said, “Hello.”

“What’re you doing?” Harry asked as he crouched down to see it better.

“I’m doing a miniature version of The Office. Right now, I’m painting the walls. So, when I put them together, it looks like an empty office. I already have the grey felt paper for the carpet flooring of the whole office. I haven’t sticked it yet because I have to cut out the exact shape of the floor if that makes sense.” You rambled as you continued painting.

“That sounds… tiring.” Harry said. He looked around and saw Tessa coming back to him. He pats her head before throwing the ball once more, making the dog leave again.

“It’s really tiring. I’m just glad that I have all the materials and the patience to make things like this. A few months ago, I did Rachel and Monica’s apartment. It was epic!” You grinned before looking at him. “What do you do?”

“Excuse me?” Harry asked, sitting down next to you to stretch his legs.

“Like, what do you do in your free time, or just in general? What are your hobbies? Anything.” You asked him.

“Oh! I, uh, I’m a filmmaker.” Harry answered. You looked at him for a while and nodded. “That’s interesting. I’ve never met a filmmaker before. I guess this’ll be my first time meeting one.”

“There’s a first time for everything.” Harry chuckled awkwardly. “I’m Harry, by the way.” He extended his hand to you.

“Like the prince?” You asked and he laughed, but nodded. “I’m Y/N.” You shook hands before you continued painting. Tessa came back with the ball and Harry took it from her before throwing it again.

“What kind of films do you make?” You asked as you carefully put the cardboard down on the spot next to you to let it dry. You grabbed another cardboard and started painting it.

“Just anything that comes to mind, really. Right now, I’m making a documentary about ‘great love’.” Harry said and you nodded.

“Why?”

“What do you mean why?”

“Why are you making a documentary about ‘great love’?” You asked. You paused painting to look at him with curious eyes. Harry looked at you and shrugged, “There’s no special reason, actually. I just want to experiment. It sucks, though. I don’t feel it and I hate that I don’t feel it.”

You nodded in understanding, “You need a muse, y’know, like an inspiration.”

“Funny. My mum said the same thing.” Harry chuckled which made you smile.

“Great minds think alike.” You giggled. “Your mum and I should hang out, then. We clearly have the same thoughts.”

“I’ll tell her.” Harry said. You both laughed and you looked at your watch. The sun was about to set and you decided it’s best to start packing up your materials. Harry helped you pack up and when you were done, you smiled at him.

“Thank you.” You said and he just grinned in return. “I have to go. It was nice meeting you, Harry.”

“It was nice meeting you too, Y/N.” Harry said. At that moment he realized that if he lets you go, he probably would never see you again. If he never sees you again, his mind will swarm with what could have been’s and what if’s. He didn’t like it already. He knew he had to decide now and he did.

“Can I have your number, Y/N?”

As cheesy as it sounds, Harry became motivated in his work again. He began to really feel things towards you and it made him soar. His mum was right. He’ll know when he meets the right person for him. Lucky for him, he found that person at 22 years old while others aren’t so lucky.

He never doubted you for one second. He knew that you were the right person for him. That’s why he confidently asked you on a date. He was delighted when you agreed to go on a date with him. Eventually, one date turned into multiple dates. You even met his family. You thought it was too soon, but he insisted on introducing his great love to his loved ones.

You and Harry didn’t have a label yet and you were still at the ‘getting to know’ stage of your ‘relationship’. Harry learned about your quirks while you learned about his likes and dislikes. It was truly an exciting experience for you because it’s different and new; it’s refreshing.

Harry was your breath of fresh air on a sunny day. He was your quiet life in the countryside. With him, you were peaceful and safe. Your life would come to a pause when you’re around him because you want to live in the moment. You were merely a passerby in this situation.

Of course, passersby come and go. People who pass through the countryside rarely stay because it would only be a matter of time until they make their way back to the hustle bustle of the city.

And it happened to you.

His name was Jack. You and Jack had a long history together, but you both went your separate ways for reasons you could barely recall. You know how people have something consistent in their lives? Jack was yours and you were his. Even if you weren’t together anymore, both of you knew that you’d have each other no matter what. You didn’t know how Jack found you, but he did. After all, that’s how fate works.

Then suddenly the life in the countryside didn’t seem as enticing as it was anymore. The air made you feel suffocated and the sun started burning your skin. Your quiet life in the countryside began to make you feel agitated. Your life desperately wanted to play, but it stayed on a pause and you feared that it would stay that way. You wanted to move on and go through the roads up ahead, but something- someone, rather, was holding you back.

You knew it was time to come clean. As much as you enjoyed and liked Harry’s company, you just couldn’t stay with him. It pained you to realize that the countryside wasn’t for you even if it seemed so perfect. But fate tied you to the city and a city person, you’ll remain. When you told Harry, he didn’t understand it. You didn’t expect him to understand immediately, but you knew that in time, he will.

And he did.

He didn’t let you go; you just left. Besides, he could never let you go. You were the best thing that’s ever happened to him. He was crestfallen for a long time, but his mum told him that things would get better. And she was right… again.

Harry moved on too, but he never forgot about you. To him, you’ll always be in his heart. He finally finished the documentary and he was happy with the outcome.

“Hi, it’s Harry! I’ve decided to add a little clip of me saying stuff that I’ve learned throughout this documentary.” Harry said with a small smile on his face.

“I’ve learned that great love is different for everyone. Great love is loving someone unconditionally and great love is also being an all in one person for your one and only person. Great love is or are people who care for you regardless of the decisions you make and will make. They also want what’s best for you. You have the urge to protect them at all costs and you treasure them because you don’t want to lose them in your life.”

“Great love will always be there; it stays. It’s what you want and will go back to, no matter what. It’s yearning someone for the rest of your life. Great love is understanding someone on the deepest level and you do things for them just because you love them. It’s something that makes someone’s world meaningful. Greatest love would make you want to twist and turn, cry and burn, but you’d like it. You’d like it because it comes with it.”

“During the process of this documentary, I’ve met my great love. I realized that all the answers that I’ve heard made sense when I met this person.”

“Unfortunately, this person isn’t in my life anymore. I used to curse life because of it, but now I get it. I was not their great love, but they were mine. What I felt for them was special and I will never feel that way for someone ever again. I now understand that just because I found great love for me, doesn’t mean that I’m their great love too. I will forever yearn for this person, but I will move on. I am moving on.”

Harry paused for a second and smiled at the camera, “Thank you for watching.”

* * * *

lol what do yall think??? i personally like how it turned out. feedback would be greatly appreciated. you are all my great loves 🤍

𝐍𝐄𝐖 𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐑𝐘 𝐇𝐎𝐋𝐋𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓: @thatforgottenangel @turtoix @givebuckyhisplumsnow @just-here-to-escape-from-reality @yourstrulyamour @euphorichxlland @thevelvetseries @buckymylove @more-like-reyna @aayaissaa

𝐍𝐄𝐖 𝐆𝐄𝐍𝐄𝐑𝐀𝐋 𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓: @holland-styles @trustfundparker @calltothewild @felicityparkers @hufflepuffprincess24 @tommysparker @justasmisunderstoodasloki @quaksonhehe @call-me-baby-gir1 @itstaskeen @theonly1outof-a-billion @lost-in-the-stars03 @justafangirlduh @piscesparker @speedymaximoff @miraclesoflove @lexirv @blairscott @getbywithasmile @pqrkerr @lavender-writer @blackbat2020 @hoodpankow @bi-lmg @emmastarz

+ @leafy-holland (oml why cant i tag u??)

#harry holland #harry holland one shots #harry holland x reader #harry holland x y/n #in-a-lot-of-fandoms-tbh

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aomineavenue · 4 years ago

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Homesick (Miya Atsumu x f!Reader) | 001. the unexpected.

Summary: Six years ago, L/N Y/N wouldn’t exactly say that she loves her life. It had always been problematic but her best friend, Miya Atsumu, since she was eight when she moved to Hyōgo, has always been there for her, and she wouldn’t change it for the world. However, things would always fall apart for her ever since, so she should have expected of such. Running away from her problems seemed like the easiest route to take at the time, so what happens when the past comes barging back into her life demanding answers? Will she be able to confront her demons?

Pairings: Miya Atsumu x f!Reader

Updates: irregular.

Genre: Angst, ANGST I LOVE ANGST, a lil bit of fluff here and there.

Warnings: Language, etc. (Will be mentioned once posted because I don’t want spoilers huehue)

Disclaimer: I do not own any characters except for the reader and my ideas. I do not claim any images used for content in this fic, everything goes out to their respective creators unless it is mentioned that it is mine.

Status: ongoing. | series masterlist

↩ intro | the unexpected | a mother’s nightmare ↪

mia’s speaks:

Okay, so before we start the story. I’d just like to explain that this may be a slow burn kinda thing because I fully want everyone to understand yn’s point of view after she ran away six years ago. We will eventually enter Atsumu’s point of view along the story, but for now, I hope you guys like this! Let me know what you guys think!

It had been six years and to this day, it still haunts you. Well, what they say is true anyway. Everything you run away from will eventually continue to haunt you until you decide to face it head-on. Needless to say, you were feeling pretty pathetic. Six years later, and that is still what you felt to this day. Pathetically sad.

The cool air emitting from the air conditioner set up in the living room, mixed with the early morning cold winter atmosphere that engulfed most of Japan with its beautiful white coat, brushes against the patches of exposed skin causing you to shiver slightly, silently cursing to yourself for forgetting to turn the appliance off during the night before. You had awoken too early for your liking, the sun barely peeking as you left the comforts of your bed to grab a cup of coffee. You were never a morning person, only because it was the time where you were often left with your thoughts as the time slot was usually unproductive.

During such unproductive hours, your thoughts usually consumed you. If it weren't about work or the handful of people you hold close to your heart, it often leads you to thoughts of your life six years ago. You wondered what it would be like if you hadn't opted to run away from reality a few years back during your high school years. Your train of thought often wandered to countless possibilities if you had faced your problems earlier on. To you now, running away seemed almost petty. Well, sorta.

Would you have been happy? Would they have accepted things? Would you have grown apart? Would they have pushed you away?

Sadly, you'd never know. This is only because you fear the truth so you refuse to return and seek certain answers that no doubt will only lead to ultimate disaster. You fear the consequences of your actions. To simply put, you were a coward.

You move your gaze away from the hot cup of coffee on the kitchen counter over to glance out of the window from your apartment, watching the dark skies slowly fade away to signal a brand new day on the horizon, the sun painting the sky a bright calming hue. Any minute now, your friends that had decided to crash at your place during the previous night are bound to wake up. Your tiny space had become some sort of safe haven for when they needed to hide away from their own problems, or when they needed you to nurse their drunken states.

Despite it sparking irritation within yourself, you could never bring yourself to deny them. The group had been nothing but a solid help for you the past six years when you fled from Hyōgo and where you settled yourself in the comforts of your late father's best friend back in Kanagawa, Suwa Riku, reconnecting with one of your childhood friends, Suwa Reiji. The loving Suwa family accepted you with open arms, practically calling you their own despite the situation you dug yourself in. Honestly, if they had turned you away, you would have probably ended up in the gutter somewhere in Japan as you had no other place to go. It wouldn't have even shocked you if they were to turn their backs at you when you had first came knocking on their front door, practically drenched from the pouring rain, it was barely enough to conceal the tears.

However, despite the past they barely knew, they accepted you with open arms without an ounce of judgment. If they were curious, they asked politely, and if certain questions were too difficult for you to answer, they respected your need for privacy.

When you had left everything behind in Hyōgo, you wanted to forget. You had deleted your previous profiles from any sort of social media platform that you had and changed your number when you had the chance. To everyone in Hyōgo, you completely disappeared, a mere ghost that residents either often gossiped about or have completely forgotten, it wasn't as if you were well known within the community, but—still, your disappearance had quite the impact. However, since no one has found you yet in the past six years, it probably meant that your mother didn't care. You assumed the same for your handful of friends. You stayed with the Suwa Family in Kanagawa for at least a year and a half, time for yourself and to get adjusted to your new life before you convinced yourself to get a job that will lead you to a somewhat peaceful life, you needed it for support, now more so than ever. Once again, you are in debt when your childhood friend Reiji offered you a job as a manager for their group. Of course, how could you say no? Despite the busy schedule, you managed enough, sometimes giving you the ability to be flexible.

Ah, yes. Suwa Reiji, the lead singer for the famous boy band, Galaxy Standard. The two of you had been friends before you had moved to Hyōgo when you were eight years old. Despite the distance between the two of you, when your father was still around since your fathers were close friends, the two of you did keep in touch. However, as you grew older and found new friends in Hyōgo, the need to keep in touch disappeared almost instantly. Thankfully, despite years of not having any contact with each other, the two of you reconnected, happy to be back in each other's lives.

The past six years, as you tried to find yourself and finally settle independently, Reiji was there.

And despite the exhausting job of managing a boy band, you adored it. It kept you occupied. Despite the boys being famous, you opted to keep your social media platforms private, or rather secret, only your friends and a few of Galaxy Standard's fans knew of it. Although the fans knew of your existence, you wanted your personal life private and thankfully, the management and fans respected that with the help from your friends who are aware of your situation. You wanted to stay hidden. Accompanying the boys in certain events, despite being a girl where it was typical for fangirls to grow upset because of the close contact with their idols, the fans respected you and often held polite conversations with you.

Yes, despite the troubles you have, you wouldn't deny the fact that you were indeed happy, but lately, something in the back of your mind has been irking you, making you feel extremely uneasy for not knowing what it could be. It frustrated you to no end.

"Someone looks like a vein in their head might pop," you hear Reiji tease as he approached. You roll your eyes before turning your attention over to the man that intruded your thoughts. Bless him, you were slowly becoming crazy with all the thinking. However, you weren't going to praise him or anything, despite Reiji's calm and humble personality towards others, he was a completely different person towards you; often teasing, most days very playful.

You snap back playfully, "Good morning to you, too." He occupies the seat across from you, despite stumbling to your apartment the previous night completely drunk from a party, the man before you showed no sign of a hungover, you were used to it by now. "Seriously, you and Shizuma need to find some other place to crash. I don't even know how you roped him into drinking, he was absolutely thrashed when the two of you arrived. Normally, he'd be the responsible one."

"Yeah, but once he starts drinking, there's no stopping him. And Nah," he chuckles as he leans against the counter, a yawn escaping his lips as he spoke midway, "Your place is comfy but also because I get to see the cute faces of my favourite nephews almost instantly, it's a bonus."

"Uncle Reiji!"

"Where's Uncle 'zuma?"

Speaking of the little devils. Both of your attentions snaps at the two identical figures that stepped out of their shared room and into the vicinity that you and Reiji occupied.

The sight of their sleepy states warmed your heart at just how cute they have grown. Ah, yes. Your two boys. One of the two reasons why you preferred to keep your personal life, private. Of course, there was also Atsuhiko and Atsuhiro to think about. Your precious boys, your utmost priority. Everything you could ever want and more. They were the two that you could finally call home. As much as you know that your existence wouldn't be much of a big deal to the fans since you weren't entirely famous, you refused to let your boys get caught into any unnecessary drama that your friends have often got themselves into, so despite having famous uncles, you kept them shielded whenever you can. Of course, the fans of Galaxy Standard were aware of the existence of your little boys, often swooning when one of their idols were photographed with one of the twins. Needless to say, it always made the fans crazy, but you were grateful that the fans were respectful and never crossed the line whenever your boys were included.

Of course, the main reason why you wanted everything to be kept private was that you didn't want certain people to know the secret you've worked hard to stay hidden, but Japan was big, wasn't it? You often reassured yourself that it was impossible for paths to cross.

"Why are you looking for your Uncle Shizuma when I'm here?" Reiji asks, feigning hurt in his expression as both six-year-old boys approach, yawning and sleepily rubbing their eyes.

Atsuhiro, or rather Hiro, as he liked to be called sighs as he shakes his head at his uncle, "But Uncle 'zuma is the best."

"Now you take that back young man!" He scoffs as he playfully places his hands on his hips, "Who do you think raised you?"

The little boy tilts his head to the side as he watches his uncle in amusement of his antics, "Uncle 'zuma helped too! Mommy says he even helped out changing diapers which you didn't do!"

"But Uncle Reiji's the best! He always plays with us!" Atsuhiko, Hiko, retorts as he rushes over to his uncle to give him a high five, "Mommy, Uncle Rei said he's going to teach us some tricks like he did back then in Stride! Isn’t that cool?"

You send a glare towards the man that was mentioned by your son, who only avoided your gaze as he ruffles your son's hair, "Maybe something else. You can ask your uncles to teach you how to sing and dance like they always do, just not that dangerous sport."

Atsuhiko groans in protest while the other twin approaches you, wrapping his short arms around your leg, "Do you think they can teach us volleyball?"

"Oh yes!" Atsuhiko yells out happily agreeing with his twin, his dismay for his mother's earlier disapproval flying out the window as he looks at you with hope in his eyes, "Volleyball is so cool! Can we mommy?"

Almost instantly, a lump formed in the back of your throat at the mention of the mere sport, a reminder. It wasn't as if you were against the sport, but what caught you off guard was the interests your boys clearly showed. How ironic.

As you raised the two, whether at times you were alone or had help, you often pushed the twins away from certain reminders of your past. What was that? Anything that reminded you of your past in Hyōgo was pushed aside. It was rather petty, you knew that yourself but as the twin boys grew throughout the years, it didn't get unnoticed how their features screamed of the one and only Miya Atsumu. Well, you expected that—he is the father of your twin boys, but you silently prayed during your pregnancy and as you raised them that their features would come from your side of the family instead of his.

But of course, somehow you've upset the Gods for your pettiness. This was your consequence. A daily reminder. There's no denying of your love for your boys. They were your life and you wouldn't change anything because then they wouldn't exist. However, you've grown hateful of your past as years gone by. Your hatred for the awful memories had made it more difficult to forget.

You expected the interest in volleyball before they even mentioned it to you today. The clues in their shared room were enough for you to pick up that they were most likely to take after their father in a sense, not that they know of such.

Earlier, about two years prior when they first started in kindergarten, it was inevitable for such to talk about your families, you remember experiencing such back then despite it being foggy. They returned home, despite being young, they were smart for their age and bombarded you with questions without holding back; wondering about who was their father and where he was, or if Uncle Reiji or Uncle Shizuma were their fathers. Back then, you couldn't bring yourself to tell them the truth or even utter a single word about the man missing in their lives.

You experienced a whole week of silent treatment from your two boys because you refused to answer, their stubbornness hard as a rock. You refuse to answer their questions? Well, they, of course, fight back by refusing to talk to you. Oh, children, right? Of course, Reiji and Shizuma were a big help because to the twins, the two of your friends were practically the only father figures that they had. Since Atsuhiko and Atsuhiro refused to utter a word to you, they tried their best to talk to the twins, avoiding certain parts that they were too young to know about, and explained that when they grew up and they were ready to know, you would eventually let them know.

Bless the heavens because, after that, your two boys returned to their loving yet sneaky nature, never asking or mentioning about their father again. However, the majority of the conversations about their father were kept in secret between the two. Atsuhiro wanting to know more while Atsuhiko pushing the idea away, but not wanting to upset his brother, he keeps his dismay of their missing father from Atsuhiro, who grew more eager to find his father as years go by.

"What's with all the excitement at such an early hour? You two always have so much energy. What's this I hear about wanting to play volleyball?" Shizuma saves you from answering and you share a silent communication to send your gratitude for the interference.

Atsuhiro breaks out into a grin at the sight of his favourite uncle and immediately approaches him, "Uncle 'zuma, do you know how to play volleyball? Can you teach me and Hiko? Please?"

Shizuma chuckles in response, ruffling the little boy's messy locks, "I'm not that good but if you and your brother are serious about wanting to learn volleyball, I know a friend that may be of help."

"You do?" Atsuhiko asks, excitement in his voice.

You repeat, arching a brow in curiosity, "You do?"

"Well he's more of Asuma's friend than mine but we're good acquaintances," he answers with a shrug of his shoulders, "I'll see what I can do for my two favourite nephews."

"Yes!" The twins exclaim happily at the same time before running towards each other to share their routine handshake.

"Now that's settled," Reiji starts, clapping his hands together to grab the attention from everyone in the room, "Aren't you two supposed to be getting ready for your day with Grandpapa and Grandmama Suwa? You wouldn't want to keep those two waiting, I heard they have a really big day planned ahead for the two of you."

Ah, Grandpapa and Grandmama Suwa. Reiji's parents, and well—your substitute parents and the twins' substitute grandparents. Despite not being biologically related, they treated the three of you like a real family. They helped you throughout your pregnancy and at the same time raising your two boys. They did what any grandparent would do, discipline and spoil them. You wouldn't change it for the world. The love they had for your boys was overwhelming, and Atsuhiko and Atsuhiro completely adored their substitute grandparents just the same.

Atsuhiro releases a gasp from his lips at the realization of the big day, he had been excited, to say the least, rushing to get prepared whilst Atsuhiko frowns and stays rooted in where he stood, "But today's Uncle Asuma's birthday! I want to go too!"

"No can do, kiddo." Shizuma shakes his head, crossing his arms across his chest; an indication the twins are familiar with that meant it was not up for any negotiation. "You know this party isn't for little boys, your Uncle Asuma already told you this, but he promised to take both of you out tomorrow to make up for it. You and Hiro can celebrate his birthday tomorrow, I promise."

Atsuhiko releases a dramatic sigh, throwing his little hands in the air as he stomps his way to get ready, knowing that if he were to argue, he would inevitably lose. Oh well, he thought to himself, Grandpapa and Grandmama are the best anyway.

"I don't know how you do it, 'zuma." You let out a laugh, shaking your head. "Those two have become spoiled to the core because of all of us, yet when it comes to you and their Grandpapa Riku, they suddenly become little angelic-slash-monsters who obey every command."

Shizuma lets a grin spread on his lips, "Some things can't be taught. Anyway, I'll get going. I have to help prep Asuma's party. I'll see you guys there."

"I'll get going too," Reiji declares as he stands up from his seat, "Don't back out of the party, I'll drag you there if I have to, I swear."

You roll your eyes at them, more so at Reiji than Shizuma, shooing them with your hands as you follow them to the front door, "Yeah, whatever. I'll be there. Stop worrying."

Dropping the twins at the Suwa Residence after eating lunch together was often smooth sailing as the twins always adored spending the day with their substitute grandparents. However, Atsuhiko expressed his dismay of being left behind once again insisting of wanting to attend his Uncle Asuma's birthday party, you had to pry his hands away from his grip on your leg. Thankfully, you had help from his Grandpapa Riku, and after waving goodbye to a smiling Atsuhiro and a scowling Atsuhiko, you were off to get a few errands done before heading to Asuma's apartment to celebrate his birthday, taking your sweet time to avoid your favourite, yet rowdy bunch of friends, only because they probably wanted you to help them set up the party, which you didn't want to take part in.

Honestly, you could have chosen otherwise but decided against skipping the errands that would most probably pile up despite the break Galaxy Standard was having. Plus, you may or may not have, forgotten to get a gift for Asuma and if you showed up empty-handed, well, you weren't going to hear the end of it.

Hours went by as you got through your list of errands, you were left with messages and certain phone calls that you ignored throughout the day, you were finally able to buy a suitable gift for your friend. All there was left to do was show up to the party that was apparently already in full swing. Thankfully, your friend's lavish apartment was around the corner.

You waited for the traffic lights to signal the safe journey across the busy streets, your grip on the neatly wrapped gift on one hand slightly tightening against you as you shiver from Japan's cool winter breeze bustling through the air, something you're still obviously not very fond of. For as long as you can remember, you hated the cold. It was a bitter reminder of the times you were utterly alone. You always preferred the warm temperature, whether it was from a fireplace or someone else, it kept you from going numb, made to remind you of reality.

The sound of your phone ringing startles you from your thoughts and you pull the device from one of your pockets, Reiji's name flashing across the screen. You grumble to yourself of his impatience before answering the call, bringing the device up to press against your ear. Before you could utter a word, he beats you to it in a demanding tone, "Where are you? You're late."

"Hold your horses, Rei." You answer in irritation as you look up ahead to check the traffic lights that still had the signal to stay where you were, "I'm almost there. Be patient." However, you couldn't process the words Reiji muttered next from the other line. Someone calling out your name catching your attention, your eyes widening slightly at the realization of who it was. Immediately, you cut off Reiji's rambling from the other line and ended the call, slipping the phone back into your pocket as you feel your shoulder tense at his presence standing next to you. "Osamu."

"So it is you," he blinks in disbelief, his eyes drinking your features bit by bit to check if he was dreaming or not, "You look different, I barely recognized you if it weren't for your voice, but it really is you."

You nod stiffly, "I suppose I would since it has been six years and all. What are you doing all the way here in Kanagawa?"

Suddenly, a memory flashes across your mind. A memory of earlier in your apartment, Shizuma mentioning a friend who knew how to play volleyball. No, it couldn't be, right?

"Ah, I'm actually checking a few spots around here for my business," he lifts his shoulders in a shrug, "So Kanagawa, huh? This is where you've been hiding all this time?"

Your lips press into a thin line, feeling uneasy under his gaze. Of course, you would, you're practically hiding a really big secret. "I'm sorry, I don't have time to chat. I have plans and my friends are already egging me on for being late."

The traffic lights save you from a painful conversation, signalling that it was safe to cross but before you could take a step away, you feel him grasp onto your shoulder to pull you back. You turned your head to face him, ready to fight him off but you halted your actions at the sign of sadness his features displayed. You took the time to examine his features, your heart practically leaping as you were able to take in everything unlike seconds ago where you were purposely trying to leave. Of course, back then when you were friends, you considered Osamu as handsome. I mean, why wouldn't you? You were practically in love with his twin brother who you found extremely handsome at the time. However, that wasn't what ran through your mind. You began thinking that Atsumu probably looked just as good, and suddenly you felt a shitload of bricks slamming right down on your shoulders, the feeling of panic surging through your veins, wondering if Atsumu was around too that you failed to notice Osamu pull out a small card from his wallet, holding it out for you to take. He seemed to read your thoughts as he spoke to reassure you, "Don't worry. He's not here, but..." He trails off, looking at you with hope in his eyes, "take this, it has my number on it. When you're ready, I'm here to listen. I always have been. I want to know what you've been up to. I want to catch up."

At Osamu's reassurance, you feel your shoulders slowly relax as you take the card from him, your eyes scanning the printed numbers and words, Ongiri Miya, making you realize that he hadn't pursued Volleyball like his twin often rambled on. You flicker your gaze up to meet his once more and he gives you a small smile. You slowly nod as you slip the card into one of your back pockets, "I have to go."

He watches you leave, the smile he had instantly morphed into a frown as he watches you walk away once more and eventually disappear from his line of sight. He silently prayed that you would contact him when you could, wanting to reconnect with you after all these years, to know why you left. He promises to himself that when you do decide to reach out, that you wouldn't mention anything to his idiot brother.

He noted the shift of your body, how your shoulders relaxed at the mention of someone not being around, he knew that you had thought about his brother. And it only confirmed his suspicion of you leaving because of what his brother had done six years ago, the last day people saw you in Hyōgo. However, something still was missing, he still craved an answer. You couldn't have left just because of Atsumu's actions. So what was it?

Either way, he was determined to find out. You may have not known it then, but Osamu cared about you a lot. However, due to you being blinded by his twin brother's light, you failed to notice. He wasn't going to let you go this time, he'll find a way to get you back in his life. His phone blares his ringtone, snapping him out of his thoughts. As he brings his phone up, he grumbles underneath his breath at the sight of his brother's incoming call. Speak of the devil.

"What is it?"

He hears his brother whine from the other line, "Can't I just call my brother once in a while?"

"You only ever do that when you're in trouble or need something," he retorts with a roll of his eyes.

Atsumu laughs in response, "How'd the shop searching go? Anything interesting so far? When you coming back?"

"Hold up, what's with the questions?" He laughs at the sound of his brother's enthusiasm. It's true, they often disagreed with each other but when it came to supporting each other's passion, they were always there for the other. He shifts his gaze over to where you stood moments ago, a smile ghosting his lips at the memory of the brief conversation the two of you shared. "Yeah, maybe something interesting here in Kanagawa after all." He listens to his brother speak excitedly over the phone causing him to shake his head at the ridiculous tone. "Oh? He's here? Maybe I can hit him up..."

After the encounter with Osamu, you practically quickened your pace to Asuma's apartment, your heart beating erratically. You hadn't even realized you were holding your breath until you were gasping for air. Luckily, the majority of Asuma's guests were preoccupied that they hadn't noticed your entrance. You were sure you looked embarrassing looking extremely flustered.

You hear your name being called and as soon as you caught your breath, you notice Shizuma calling you over, Asuma and Reiji along with someone you seem to recognize but can’t seem place in your mind. Walking over, your lips curl up to a small smile as you extend your arm to hand over Asuma's gift, "Happy Birthday, 'suma. Here's my gift."

Asuma's eyes instantly light up, retrieving the gift from you, "I was going to get mad at you for being late but since you have a gift for me, I'll let it slide. Did the boys pick this for me?"

"Gee, aren't I lucky." You drawl sarcastically, a laugh being shared within the group as you shake your head, "No, you think those two would let me give them your gift? They said they'll give it to you tomorrow when you take them out. Hiko was upset when I left him with his Grandpapa Riku, though. He had this cute little scowl." Your three friends laugh, imagining their nephew in their heads. You flicker your attention over to the person who was watching you interact with the others with amusement, you smile at him politely. "I'm sorry. How rude of me."

"Oh, right!" Shizuma speaks as soon as your name slips out of your mouth to introduce yourself, holding out your hand for a shake which he grabs, "This is the friend I was talking about that can teach the boys volleyball."

"Hey! Hey! Hey!" He starts with a grin as he shakes your hand firmly, his enthusiasm infectious. Releasing his grip on your hand, he sends a little wave, "Bokuto Koutarou I'm a friend of Asuma's. Shizuma here was just telling me about your boys and how they were interested in volleyball and I wouldn't mind helping them out."

Asuma adds, "He's a professional volleyball player for Japan's V.League in Division 1. MSBY Black Jackals was it?"

You watch as the man who you thought kind of resembled a horned owl nod his head towards Asuma's direction, something about him oddly familiar. You hum along, eyes widening slightly at the information. "Professional? Wow, colour me impressed. Wouldn't you be too busy to train two six-year-olds, then?"

"I'll speak for everyone who knows her two boys that they're absolute devils," Reiji chuckles with a shake of his head, "Fast learners though. We'd teach them how to run like in Stride if we could but their mother over here refuses."

You scoff, "Because that sport can be dangerous!"

"Stride, huh?" Bokuto butts in, interested. "But yes, I have some time to teach. I'm sure they'll be okay. I owe Asuma anyway. I don't mind."

The corners of your mouth twitch to an unsure smile. You didn't know if you were going to go through with this if you were honest, but it isn't exactly something you can reject as your three other friends were present, and they would do anything for their favourite set of twins, spoiled rotten those two were.

"Don't worry," Shizuma claims, nudging you with his elbow as he gives you a reassuring smile, "They'll be in good hands, one of us will find the time to attend their little training. We're not as busy lately due to our little holiday anyway."

You hum softly as you continue to examine Bokuto under your gaze before something in your mind clicks, eyes widening ever so slightly. “I think I know you! Weren’t you at the Christmas Party last year that Reiji held?”

He nods with a grin, “I was actually. Asuma invited me and I went along with a couple of friends. Funny how we’ve crossed paths before and yet we’re only meeting now, ay?”

“Ah, yeah. I think I remember now, sort of.” you laugh, nodding your head in agreement, “That party was crazy anyway. I don’t think anyone wants to remember that crazy night. Especially Reiji.”

The man mentioned scoffs, rolling his eyes. “That’s why whenever I plan parties it’s never at my place anymore.” He shudders at the memory, “Drunk bastards doing the nasty at my place. And that model’s awful moaning could be heard even when the music was blasting.”

You scrunch up your face in disgust, “Thankfully I left early then,”

An awkward laugh escapes Bokuto’s lips as he scratches the back of his neck sheepishly, “Yeah about that...”

“That was you?” you and Asuma let out a gasp, eyes widening while Shizuma bursts out laughing. Reiji on the other hand, obviously not amused at the information.

“Dude, what the heck!” Reiji exclaims, brows furrowing, “The least you could have done was choose a guest bedroom rather than on my own bed!”

“Oy!” he laughs, holding his hands out, “I didn’t say it was me. I was just saying I know who it was. It was one of my friends, but I’d rather not say who.”

Asuma joins his older brother Shizuma in laughing at the side while you try your best to calm down Reiji by tugging on his arm. “Anyway, Bokuto. I think we should talk about the schedule of your training with my boys. I’m sure they’ll be excited when they find out someone will be training them volleyball.”

Somehow, a part of you was screaming at you, telling you that this wasn't going to end well. Of course, you didn't realize at the time that you would come to regret such a decision, not like you had any say against it either. Your little boys were spoiled rotten and often got their way whether through innocent means or their sneaky tactics. It didn't help that their group of uncles were wrapped around their little fingers.

Ah, yes. You hadn't realized it yet, but it was the start of a roller coaster ride.

#atsumu x reader #atsumu x you #atsumu imagine #atsumu imagines #haikyuu #hq #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu imagine #haikyuu imagines #atsumu miya x reader #miya x reader #miya imagine #miya imagines

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stardustryewriting · 4 years ago

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New Year’s Revelation

When Marco and Ace talk about their respective crushes, they're both surprisingly mostly sober. They give Thatch a headache anyway.

Also on AO3: here

New Year’s Eve on the main ship of the Whitebeard Pirates - and on every minor ship, Marco was sure - has always been a big thing. While they couldn’t do the fireworks tradition, because of the safety on board, and because neither Marco nor Newgate trusted their drunk crew mates with it, they did virtually everything else. Which always included drinking like it was the end of the world, eating a banquet that seemed to get larger every year and just generally partying like the were no worries in the world. New Year’s Eve has always been a big event.

And then Ace came along.

Suddenly they didn’t only have to celebrate making it through another year, but they had a birthday on top of it. Well, it was Ace’s birthday, but everyone else ate and drank like it was theirs, too. Marco was torn between reprimanding them (some of them had to stay sober, in case they were attacked, but no one seemed to understand) and joining in as lively as they were, because Ace seemed to be truly happy. And Ace’s happiness was something to behold.

Not that it was a rare occasion. Ace was almost always seen with a smile on his face. (When he wasn’t sitting over a ton of navigation maps, his forehead wrinkling in concentration and he was cute then, too.) But usually there was some kind of darkness underneath it. Like Ace carried a secret big enough to be his doom, one day. He knew, in fact, that Ace did have a secret, he refused to tell them about. But he also knew, that Ace told Pops and Pops said not to worry about it. It was a big thing for Ace, but it wasn’t something that would impact the crew. Marco trusted Pops and he trusted Ace, so he wouldn’t be prodding. Even though he couldn’t help but be curious.

But on nights like these, when Ace once again proved that he could eat more than half of the crew together, and laughed with them like he’s always been a part of their big, weird family, Marco didn’t have the heart to try and coax something out of Ace. He was so happy, his smile so radiant, Marco could spent the entire night just looking at him from afar. In fact that was his plan for the night, until Thatch came along. How his brother could afford not being in the kitchen, with the rate their food was vanishing, was beyond Marco. But he hadn’t had a good talk with Thatch - that didn’t involve either of their divisions or the provisions needed for the celebration - in days, so when his brother took a seat next to him, he didn’t want to talk about the kitchen.

„You know, today would be the day to finally kiss Ace“, Thatch said, grinning like a madman - or like someone trying to get a raise out of his brother - and Marco decided he would much rather talk about what’s happening in the kitchen. Not that that was likely, now that Thatch has already started a conversation about Ace. Which seemed to be Thatch’s new favorite thing to talk to Marco about. (And Pops’, and Izo’s and Vista’s and even Jozu’s. They should find another topic to gossip about in Marco’s opinion.)

„Nah, with the amount of alcohol he’s consumed, I’d rather not“, Marco argued, in hopes Thatch would accept this better, than his usual argument.

(I’m twice his age, Marco would argue. We’re pirates, Thatch would shrug it off, like it gave them a free pass for everything. It didn’t.)

„You“, Thatch said sternly instead, pointing an accusing finger at Marco, „are just a coward. You know Ace can’t get drunk. His fire burns the alcohol. Or something.“ Or something. Even though Marco was the ships doctor, he never quite understood how the alcohol vanished from Ace’s body. He just knew that most of it did, in fact, get lost, so getting Ace drunk usually involved an amount of alcohol that would haven even killed Pops in his prime. Not that that ever stopped Whitebeard from trying to drink with Ace until they were both wasted.

„Alright, I’m a coward“, Marco agreed easily, because really it wasn’t as insulting as Thatch thought it was, „my point remains, I’m not kissing anyone tonight.“

„Who is Marco not kissing?“, Ace asked, looking at Thatch with a curiousity only someone as young as Ace could still possess. Marco really needed to stop drinking, he didn’t even feel Ace coming over to them. But also, other than Thatch he didn’t falter in surprise, he just tensed up. Unfortunately Thatch seemed to find his voice faster, than Marco could come up with some kind of coherent answer to Ace’s question.

„Someone he’s been having a crush on for a really long time.“

„Marco has a crush?“, Ace asked, sounding surprised and Marco would have liked to argue about that. Yes, he has feelings, too, thank you very much. But this talk was going into a dangerous direction, so instead of protesting Marco had to look to divert their attention elsewhere. Ace might not be the fastest on the uptake, but he was smarter than people gave him credit for, and Marco wasn’t really interested in finding out how fast Ace could come to a conclusion with minimal evidence. That was if Thatch wouldn’t spill the beans before that.

„Yeah, he’s been pining for so long, it would be funny, if it weren’t that pathetic“, Thatch answered dramatically and made a show of throwing his arms around Marco’s shoulder and giving him a look full of pity. He really did spend too much time with Izo.

„He thinks he’s not good enough, so instead of being a man and confessing, he pines. It’s the worst“, Thatch added and Marco had the sudden impulse to knock him into the ocean.

„That’s bullshit“, Ace protested rather passionately, „Marco is a great guy. Who wouldn’t think you’re great?“ And really, it warmed Marco’s heart that Ace would defend him like that. Especially considering that barely over a year ago, Ace’s goal was to kill Pops and effectively end the Whitebeard crew. But still Ace didn’t know what he was talking about.

„It’s not that. There is just an age difference that I can’t ignore“, he tried to explain. And reached deaf ears again. Ace really did fit in with them, all too well.

„So? We’re pirates“, he shrugged, not unlike Thatch always shrugged that argument off. Thatch looked entirely too pleased with himself sitting next to Marco, gloating as if he wanted to say I told you so.

„I’m twice their age. I’d feel like a cradle robber“, Marco tried to argue with Ace again and it was entirely too reminiscent of his usual arguments with Thatch, and Pops and Izo.

„There is someone else around my age on the ship?“, Ace asked excitedly and Marco felt like he messed up. Ace wasn’t supposed to know that. At the same time Thatch’s palm met his forehead with quite a lot of force behind it and he muttered to Ace: „Be glad you’re good-looking.“

„I am good-looking“, Ace answered with a confidence that he usually had to play, but that was entirely real this time, „it’s one of my few redeeming features. People especially like my freckles.“ Yeah, Marco could see that. They were cute and fit right onto Ace’s face, even though they made him look even younger. What was Marco even doing here? Prying on their youngest crew member, that’s what.

„Yes, you are“, Thatch agreed, „but you are also way too slow on the uptake.“

„Well, what’s the uptake here, then?“, Ace demanded sounding increasingly frustrated, whereas Thatch looked like he just lost all hope in humanity. Marco could admit that Ace was a bit slow-witted right now, but it still was adorable to him.

„Forget it. It could hit you in the head and you still wouldn’t see it“, Thatch announced and then stood up, „I’m going back to my kitchen.“ And suddenly Marco was alone with Ace, who still seemed determined to find out who Marco’s crush was. Curse Thatch, for bringing it up.

„Come on, we’re friends right? You can tell me. I promise I will take it to grave with me!“, Ace declared and while Marco believed him, there was still no way he could tell Ace. Not if he wanted to keep face in front of him, anyway.

„It’s not that important, go back to celebrating your birthday. I promise you’re not missing out on anything here.“

„Alright, I tell you about my secret crush and then you tell me about yours. That way it’s fair and you can be sure, I will keep your secret“, Ace declared and didn’t even wait for Marco to agree with him, before he continued, „My crush is someone, who is in love with someone else. Not that it matters, as soon as they find out who I really am, they would avoid me anyway.“

„They don’t know you’re a pirate?“, Marco asked surprised, because you would have to be really detached from the pirate world to not know Ace is a pirate. He was a notorious rookie, he was offered a place among the Seven Warlords and he fought Jinbei for five days straight. He also made a name for himself as Whitebeard’s Second Division Commander already and he only had the spot for a few months. If you were even remotely knowledgeable about pirates, there was no way you never heard of Ace.

„They know I’m a pirate, they don’t know the other big thing. The one only Pops knows“, Ace explained and Marco could feel the curiosity again. Damn Ace and his big secret.

„You think that’s big enough to make someone hate you?“, Marco asked, because he really couldn’t imagine it to be. Pops would have told him, if it was something that big.

„I know it is. People hated me for it all my life. It’s not even my fault.“

This secret of Ace just got more confusing the more information he got out of him. Luffy knows, Ace had told him once and it didn’t really surprise Marco. Ace loved his little brother to pieces. Luffy wasn’t mad about it either, I don’t know why I thought he would be. Which was the confusing part, because apparently Ace expected the entire world to him for this secret and Luffy was the singular exception to that. That must be some kind of brother Ace had.

„Honestly, I don’t think there is anything that would make me hate you“, Marco said to Ace instead, because he seemed like he needed it and because it was true. Ace was such a sunshine, with so much sadness lurking beneath, you just had to love him. It’s not like Marco had much of a choice in that matter and the rest of the crew adored him, too.

Ace seemed to think about something and it was quite between them for a long time, before he whispered: „Even if I was the Son of Gol D. Roger?“

„Even then“, Marco answered without hesitation, „It doesn’t matter where you come from, anyway, we’re -“

„- all children of the sea“, Ace finished, seeming somewhat relieved, „Pops said the same thing.“ And then he smiled that brilliant smile at Marco, that seemed to take his breath and Marco didn’t even have the time to consider that Ace really was the son of the Pirate King, because he was so beautiful, illuminated only by the dim lights on the ship and Marco really was smitten.

„So, you don’t hate me. Too bad you’re still in love with someone else“, Ace said, seemingly not catching the implications of his own words. But Marco did. And suddenly the only thing he could concentrate on was how soft Ace’s lips looked, and how his freckles brought out the sad look in his eyes - that really shouldn’t be there, Ace looked better smiling. And how much he desperately wanted to kiss Ace.

So he did just that.

And only mid-way trough, when his brain caught up with his actions he realized that never asked for permission So, interrupting their kiss he asked: „Do you want to do this?“ And instead of answering, Ace reclaimed his lips more passionately than before and made it into an even deeper kiss.

#marace #marco x ace #whats their ship name #someone tell me #marco the phoenix #marco the pineapple #portgas d. ace #thatch #pining #mutual pining #getting together #i literally have no idea #i just wrote that

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waystobuild-blog · 4 years ago

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Top 7 CN Shows That Would Work Better in Live Action than PPG

So I think everybody’s talked about why CW Powerpuff Girls doesn’t work, whether or not it’s a real thing or not? Who even knows. But while thinking about how this:

is kinda awful for Powerpuff Girls, I got thinking what shows that this style of a reboot would work for. In which it’s live action, the character is depressed and has sort of resentment towards their childhood now and that sort of thing.

So what are the top 7 shows that I think this

Number 7:

Foster’s Home for Imaginary Friends

At Number 7 we have Foster’s Home for Imaginary Friends. Seems fitting that we’d start the list with another one of Craig McCracken’s biggest hits. Why do I think the premise of “Oh, life sucks now and I kinda wasted my childhood” would work for Foster’s? For the plain and simple fact that for a few episodes of the show, there was a focus on Mac growing up and whether or not he should leave his friends at Foster’s behind him. You could play a lot with that concept combined with the live action reboot thing. Maybe an older version of the character is dealing with whether or not to let go of both Bloo and the past and move on with his life. Frankie being a young adult during the time of the original show could also be a pretty instrumental character since it was a matter of living there, caring for the friends, having that job and balancing this life with the life that she had outside of the house.

Not quite a coming of age story but a sort of “Hey, my life has gone nowhere and where could I go with this now? Do I keep the friends I loved and cherished as a child or move onto other things? Is there a way to do both?”

Only thing I wouldn’t want though is CGI monstrosity friends. Those would be kinda the worst…

Number 6:

Okay, let’s actually talk about a real superhero show this time around. Or would this count as a superhero show? Well, they certainly do a lot of cool time travelling so I’m gonna say it’s a superhero show. Of course, I mean Time Squad.

Now if you haven’t guessed, I don’t have the most experience with this show but I know enough to think that this is something that could actually work well. I mean, Otto was a kid who was basically running around all over history protecting the balance of time with a stuck up robot and a dude who is a little too into all of this. Imagine if he just sorta did this for all of his childhood and realizing as a young adult that “Crap, I didn’t really have a childhood.” With the dynamic of the squad, the potential to expand the greater organization as a whole and just all the time travel shenanigans that could happen, I don’t see a reason not to do it.

Plus, CW already has Legends of Tomorrow and that’s awesome so even less likely to screw it up if they’ve already got a model to do it off of right?

Number 5:

The Marvelous Misadventures of Flapjack

Yo ho ho, it is a sailor’s life for me. And in this sailor’s life we’re coming in with Number 5: The Marvelous Misadventures of Flapjack. Now this is a bit of an odd choice, right? But hear me out.

Flapjack as a child kinda had only Bubbie and K’nuckles as guides for his life. While they mostly spent their lives at Stormalong Harbor, they also constantly spent their lives looking for Candied Island. What if they never stopped looking and eventually, little kid Flapjack is a grown up now and he’s like “Oh wow. I wanted adventure but I was kinda manipulated to follow this creepy old man’s dreams of candy.” I think going heavy and hard on this sort of found family between them would be kinda fun. How K’nuckles wasn’t the best role model and how they’ve still only got each other in this world, that sort of thing.

Plus, a live action Stormalong would be sooooooo cool.

Number 4:

Ben 10

As the old saying goes, it started when an alien device did what it did, stuck itself upon his wrist with secrets that it hid, now he’s got superpowers he’s no ordinary kid, it’s Ben 10.

And unfortunately in CW’s Ben 10, he’s not a kid who just wants to have fun. Nah, he’s got a lot of emotional stuff to deal with and all of that depressing stuff. Isn’t it great? Now I do think that this could work especially if you work it in where maybe Ben enlisted into the plumbers after his summer vacation and it just kinda escalated from there to the point where here he is now.

Say what you will, but at least with Ben 10, we’ve seen it hit a more grounded and emotional place with Ben 10 Alien Force and Ultimate Alien so I don’t believe that this would be too far of a stretch with how that show worked and a lot of people happened to really like those iterations of the show.

Granted, I actually do want a CW styled Ben 10, but less edgy Arrow style and more along the lines of The Flash, but I’d still take this too.

And now before we get into the top 3, let’s get into a few honorable mentions.

First up, we’ve got Steven Universe. Now honestly, this could work really well, the only issue with that is that we’ve kinda already seen this story told and that was with Steven Universe Future. Good stuff and a lot of potential, but we’ve seen it and I don’t think we need to see it again with a live action coat of paint.

Next up there’s Codename Kids Next Door. Honestly, I think the only real spinoff we need for Kids Next Door is Galactic. That’s it. Anything else is unnecessary. Still, with this sort of concept an older KND who has been decommissioned and feels like there’s something missing in their lives that they just don’t understand would be really cool. Although maybe that would work as like a movie or special or somethin’ I don’t know.

And finally for the last of the honorable mentions we’ve got Teen Titans. While I am trying to keep this list to CN Originals, I couldn’t help but bring this one up. How Long is Forever is one of my all-time favorite episodes of the 2003 series so I think seeing a series taking place in that timeline or something similar would be a lot of fun maybe for like a miniseries or something. And honestly, anything’s better than Titans.

With those three out of the way, back to the list.

Number 3:

The Life and Times of Juniper Lee

In a world full of monsters and demons, June is the only one who sees them. This is the Life and Times of Juniper Lee and it makes number three on my list.

Now, like Time Squad, I didn’t watch much of this show. But what I do know about this show is that June is cool and she’s got this whole legacy and destiny by being the newest Te Xaun Ze, which are basically the magical protectors of her town. Only problem, and why I think that this direction for this show would actually be kinda cool, is the whole thing that the Te Xaun Ze is never allowed to leave the town at any point in their lives and oh boy, you could actually go really hard on that with this format since it’s literally built into the show.

Juniper Lee all grown up and just straight up depressed because she’s got the cool powers and grabs all the monsters but everyone around her has moved on in their lives. Friends have gone off to college and started all their lives and she’s got nothing but her family in Orchid Bay. You’d have a story of someone who once was big on their destiny who has accepted it but wishes that it wasn’t theirs anymore. I do know the show dealt with this a bit but with a new continuity and an older version of the character you really could just go in and deep on this.

I stand by that this would actually be pretty cool and kinda want it. Honestly, I like this idea so much that I wasn’t sure whether to put this in the number three or the number two spot, but y’know what? The next show told me a little secret that gave it the edge.

Number 2:

The Secret Saturdays

That’s right, it’s the Secret Saturdays.

Zak Saturday went all around the world with his parents discovering ancient cryptids, protecting the world and everything. He got some cool siblings in Fiskerton, Komodo and Zon. And then to add on top of that that he’s also the reincarnation of an ancient cryptid set to rule and control all the cryptids in the world? Yeah, that’ll do it. Definitely not the type of life he asked for and kid went through a lot because of it especially after losing those powers and apparently getting them back if we’re to count the Omniverse crossover TGIS to be canon.

But having parents like Zak’s, everything with the community of Secret Scientists and not really having many friends his own age or well, his own species will do that.

Exploring Zak and maybe Argost coming back for powers he might not want anymore and learning to embrace his destiny while also trying to patch up the Saturday family would be awesome.

Number 1:

Dexter’s Laboratory

Now while I know we already have a live action Dexter and it was an incredible hit, I- Wait, not the same show.

Ahem, Dexter’s Laboratory makes the top of this list. Partially because of it being PPG’s sister series but also partially because of the whole thing of there’s a lot you could do with Dexter’s character in terms of depression. If someone with such a high intellect were to somehow lose it all or just in some way, never really got forward in life, that would do it. Dexter could be a type of character that’s too stuck inside his own head in order to move forward. Alternatively, maybe Dexter is highly successful but has found there’s something missing in life or something. I dunno.

But whichever way you decide to go with Dexter’s character, you could have Dee Dee be pretty much the opposite of that. Maybe she’s found herself a place in life that she’s content with and Dex doesn’t understand why but wants it. I think going deep on this sort of emotional aspect of his life while also having all sorts of fun crazy science stuff would be a good watch.

All in all, gimme a Dexter’s lab show but we gotta make sure he keeps some form of an accent. No accent is a dealbreaker.

Although, I think that at the end of the day, animation should really just stay animated and that we don’t need to go live action for anything. All of these ideas I’ve presented, I’d of course rather prefer as cartoons with a more balanced tone more than anything but I figured with the announcement of a PPG show, this would be a silly but fun idea to talk about rather than ranting about it like most have. Granted, I’ve got some rants of my own since I still think it’s a bad idea. Haha. But you know how it goes.

At any rate those are all the shows I think would make better CW PPG style reboots than CW PPG. When it comes to the edginess and potential for drama, I feel these shows fit the bill better than the innocent, buttkicking action that was the Powerpuff Girls.

But what do you all think? Do you have any shows in mind that I haven’t mentioned? Do you think I’ve opened Pandora’s Box and given The CW more awful ideas?

Now, this was originally a YouTube video so you can probably see that in the way that this post, especially the ending was written, but I just still don’t really have the energy to edit stuff so have this post instead. It’s something I really wanted to discuss and just decided, hey, why not make it a Tumblr post?

#Cartoon network #PowerPuff Girls #live action remake #cw powerpuff girls #Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends #time squad #The Marvelous Misadventures of Flapjack #ben 10 #steven universe #steven universe future #kids next door #codename kids next door #codename knd #knd #galactic kids next door #Teen Titans #The Life and Times of Juniper Lee #secret saturdays #dexter's laboratory

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companionship · 4 years ago

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okay one big post to get the finale out of my system! it's been lovely reading all of your analyses and reactions, and looking at all your amazing gifs and edits :')

fair warning: this is going to be so stinking long omfg

the things i enjoyed:

vincenzo remaining an anti-hero through and through, especially the fact that he didn't hold back at all when it came to myunghee and hanseok's death. he gave them a taste of their own medicine and then some forreal, their deaths were brutal but oddly satisfying, and i'm saying this as someone who usually hates violence/gore. throughout the show, they've always hinted at what he was Truly Capable Of and boy did we get to see it

vincenzo fumbling in hanseok's house and not being his usual self – a lot of people thought it was ooc, which i understand! i felt like that was the Point, to show that for once, he's not the invincible mafia consigliere that everyone thinks he is. what he did to the man who killed his mother and the army of security guards was a reaction, but this is the first time he's flustered, caught at a disadvantage, and faced with the very real possibility that he might lose somebody incredibly important to him. idk it made him more human to me

vincenzo literally not hesitating for even 0.1 seconds to fold his entire body around hers when he thought hanseok was going to shoot again – yeah that whole bit made my heart clench i feel like a crazy person i won't get over it

the chayenzo hospital scene... my god it was so tender my heart broke. the laugh they both shared, out of sheer relief that she's okay. the little joke about paying for the private room. the way not much was being said, but everything was being said at once. the way they looked at each other, as if it wouldnt ever be enough :( the quiet acceptance that this is their last night together, and that he's going to have to kill a bunch of people after this, but for now they have this. for however brief.

chayoung being chayoung – her big ass personality at the courtroom at the end after winning ms oh's case. her hopping around in those heels, looking elegant and sleek, mocking the hell out of rich conglomorates. she's in her element again and it made me so, so happy to see. i absolutely adore her, she's everything really. after all that loss and the whole ordeal, i'm glad she's able to return to what she does best: putting capitalists back in their place

mr lee being Very Much Not Dead – idk how i wouldve been able to handle it after witnessing hanseo's death like im glad he got the chance to be a dad

the kiss – my god....

the things i didn't like:

hanseo's death – lmao is it even a surprise... say what you will about his death being foreshadowed, but i really just hated hated it. i hate that hanseok won this one. i hate that hanseo worked so hard to redeem himself, only to lose it all. i hate that he was given a taste of what a real family was like, and then having it taken away so cruelly. even though i said above that i didn't mind that vincenzo was ooc at the mansion, i was still screaming at the screen because there were plenty of opportunities for the situation to be reversed. i don't necessarily blame vincenzo for hanseo's death, but i do wish that they had a funeral scene for him. i wish they acknowledged his sacrifice, and how pivotal he was in turning the tables. if not for hanseo, vincenzo really couldn't have pulled any of this off, from the interpol tipoff to the tracking device in the watch. idc idc hanseo is in malta rn, enjoying the sun and the beach, going to therapy, and teaching the local kids how to play hockey even though there's no ice :(

chayoung being bedridden the whole finale – like... NAH lmao this aint it chief... if things went my way, she wouldve gotten out of the hospital depite her injury and dealt with myunghee before handing her off to vincenzo. i loved their animosity for each other, and i wanted chayoung to be the one at myunghee's apartment waiting for her, rubbing it into her face. i wanted chayoung to verbally finish myunghee with that sharp ass tongue of hers and really dump a load of salt on her wounds. then vincenzo could do whatever the hell he wanted. you could argue that the show is called Vincenzo but i really dont care lmao it started with chayoung avenging her dad and she should've been able to strike the final blow. also what was her big second party? are we really just going to ignore her capacity for evil? after all that moral work done, after that time she spent coming to terms with using evil to combat evil, we're just going to... keep her bedridden? park jaebum u will pay for this

vincenzo losing his family – besides hanseo's death, i think this was what i hated the most from the ending. the start of the show showed us vincenzo's departure from the mafia with the very clear intention of Not Returning. the capo died, his loyalties lie with no one, paolo can suck it. throughout the show, we see him repeat over and over that he wants to get the gold and skip off to malta to enjoy a peaceful life there, while reflecting/repenting for the things he's done. vincenzo was gearing up for a lifetime of solitude. the whole point of the show was for him to find a real family and have a real chance at happiness. park jaebum really said FUCK THAT! we're gonna have him ditch the family that he built from scratch with the love of his life and then make him return to the family that tried to kill him AND make him the capo... pjb said we're gonna separate vincenzo from the family that accepts his past and sees it as a strength and not a weakness. the family that was formed out of solidarity, the family that he fought for and fought alongside with blood, sweat and tears. not to mention the goddaughter of his? sorry i would laugh if it didn't actually rile me up so bad

vincenzo not being able to come back to korea – i've said this in another post of mine, but given that he is The Vincenzo Cassano with all those resources at his disposal (guillotine file, mr ahn/mr cho/the chief etc.), the fact that he isnt even able to stay in korea for 30 fuckin minutes after finishing hanseok was ridiculous. the whole police chase was dumb as hell considering that the show has managed to stop politicians and mf presidential candidates from going after him like ? huh LMAO park jaebum had an on-demand pigeon army in this show and Yet he can't stop like 10 suddenly-righteous policemen. another big ass HUH

chayenzo (here we go...):

NOPE! i've reflected on the ending and decided that i'm going to be petty and salty for a while more before coming to terms with it

i can rationalise and try to be positive and tell myself that their love is enduring can transcend space and time and that in due time, they will find their way back to each other, and i have no doubt that they will because they're one soul in two bodies. it's quite literally canon that they're soulmates.

but let me wallow for a second

here we have two people who have done questionable and terrible things in their past coming together, growing together, grieving together, fighting together... you get the gist of it. you have two people who have found a home in each other. two people who, for all intents and purposes, were about to live in a whole lot of bitterness and solitude if not for each other and the life they built together (chayoung didn't have friends like that, and her family is gone too). to separate them like that at the very end is cruel. i know chayoung and vincenzo are mature and incredible and will be able to function without the other next to them. i know that they will still excel as lawyers and will defeat evil with their underhand methods the way they do so well but my god are they going to feel the absence and miss each other

my point is that they shouldn't have to. from what i could tell, they can't even communicate on a regular basis bc he'll be tracked and whatnot, hence the postcards. a postcard every month is a poor substitute for all those nights they stayed up drinking makgeolli and celebrating their wins. its a shitty replacement for coffee dates and fist bumps and all the moments in between. after everything they've been through, after literally fighting to death for their family, they don't deserve this. they don't deserve to meet up once a year for a couple of hours. they don't deserve pockets of time in malta or korea, their life in a perpetual countdown to when they're going to see each other next

they both deserve love and some semblance of peace (finally finally). they both deserve to have someone to come home to after a hard day of work, because doing what they do cannot be easy. they both deserve a family, deserve to have someone next to them that accepts their past and would embrace their future. they both deserve a hand to hold and a shoulder to lean on. i know they will still be It for each other despite the distance, i just wish the distance didn't even exist in the first place bc its stupid and cruel and their love shouldnt have to be proven or tested with time and space. let them stay together. let them grow together. let them be.

side note: song joongki and jeon yeobeen need another project together idc take it up with god

tl;dr: park jaebum u will be paying for my therapy bills

#vincenzo #tvn vincenzo #this was cathartic #if u made it to the end here's ur kiss #this is more for archival purposes than anything #also this is what happens when my best friends arent caught up yet and i have no outlet

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wiypt-writes · 4 years ago

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Stark Spangled Banner

Ch59: We Only Part To Meet Again

Intro: The team hold a memorial for Natasha.

Warnings: “Language!” Angst

Pairing: Steve Rogers x OFC Katie Stark

A/N: I’m STILL salty that Nat didn’t get a proper send off in Endgame so I hope I’ve done her justice in this one. We’re so near the end now… *cries*

Disclaimer: This is a pure work of fiction and classified as 18+. Please respect this and do not read if you are underage. I do not own any characters in this series bar Katie Stark and the other OCs. By reading beyond this point you understand and accept the terms of this disclaimer.

Chapter 58

Stark Spangled Banner Masterlist // Main Masterlist

Steve and Katie decided not to tell anyone about their news until both Natasha’s remembrance ceremony and Tony’s funerals were done. For no reason other than they didn’t want any of the attention being placed on them to detract from what the days were about- their friends and family taking time to remember together. In all fairness, it wasn’t too long time to have to wait. The only problem however, was that whilst it might have been easy to fool the kids, it was a little less easy to fool Bucky and Sam, especially when the morning of Nat’s memorial, Katie pushed Bucky and Sam out of the way as she ran from the kitchen and emptied her stomach into the downstairs toilet.

“She okay?” Bucky asked looking at Steve as he grabbed a bottle of water for her from the fridge.

“Just nerves, about the memorial.” Steve brushed off Bucky’s concern, and before he could be asked any further questions, he headed out into the hallway just as Katie was emerging from the bathroom. Wordlessly he handed her the bottle and gently cupped her cheek in his hand, and she smiled softly leaning into his touch.

“You were puking the last time we were on a jet together you know.” Sam quipped as they walked back into the kitchen “Maybe that says something about your flying.” Katie shot back at him, sitting down at the table.

“Nah ah, you’d eaten that dodgy chicken remember?”

Katie nodded and then Bucky gave a scoff.

“You know, you’re almost convincing.” He pointed at her. “You on the other hand,” his point moved to Steve who had reached to open the fridge, pausing as he was caught in his friend’s stare, “still can’t lie for shit. It’s written all over your face.” Katie and Steve exchanged a glance before they looked back to the two men who were both leaning against the counter, mugs of coffee in their hands.

“What’s he lying about?” Sam frowned, looking at Bucky. Bucky simply gave him an exasperated glance.

“Let’s just say it’s more likely to be dodgy sausage than chicken.”

“Buck!” Steve frowned as Katie glared at his best friend. Sam’s face rearranged itself into a look of comprehension and he turned to look at Katie.

“Really?” His eyes flickered from her to Steve. Before they could deny it, Jamie walked into the kitchen with Lucky, the pair of them having been in the garden with Emmy.

“When do we go see Auntie Nat-Nat’s tree?”

“Soon” Steve turned to his son noticing instantly his son’s shoes were filthy. “Do not move a single step more, pal.”

Jamie stood and saluted at his father, the way Tony had taught him to do whenever he was given an order and Katie snorted a laugh. With a roll of his eyes Steve bent down and undid the laces on his sneakers. Jamie kicked them off and ran over to his momma.

“Can I wear my Captain ‘Merica top Auntie Nat-Nat got me?” He asked.

“You can wear what you want today, baby.” Katie kissed his head. At that she looked around. “Absolutely no black.”

“Kinda ironic really seeing as she spent half her life being called Black Widow.” Sam mused.

“Exactly.” Katie nodded. “Today there is no black widow, only Natasha Romanoff.”

At that point Emmy stepped inside holding a ceramic pot which now contained a tulip plant she had dug up from her patch near the shed. “Will this be okay, you know, to plant under her tree?” “I think it’s perfect.” Katie smiled, standing up with Jamie in her arms. “And so would she. She liked tulips. Right young man,” she blew a raspberry on her son’s cheek and he grinned, “shower time.” “Want me to do it?” Steve asked.

“No, I’ll take him. You can deal with these two idiots.” She nodded towards Sam and Bucky. She glanced back at Steve and gave him a soft smile. “Emmy, you need to get ready too, honey.”

Steve watched as his family left the kitchen before he turned to look at Bucky. “You are a pain in my ass, you know that?” “Tell me I’m wrong.” Bucky raised an eyebrow as Steve ran his hands over his face. He looked at his friend and then couldn’t help the small smile that spread across his face.

“Yeah, she’s, we’re pregnant.”

“Fucking hell, punk!” Bucky moved to give the man a hug “That’s great news.”

“Thanks Buck.” Steve grinned, pulling back.

“Yeah nice one, Cap.” Sam beamed, shaking his hand.

“Thanks, but we’re keeping it on the low for the time being. We don’t wanna tell anyone till after Tony’s funeral, it just doesn’t feel right you know.”

Both men made affirmative nods and hand gestures, before Sam looked at Steve.

“How far along?”

Steve hesitated. “Well, we don’t know. It’s kinda complicated.”

“Complicated?” Bucky frowned “What’s complicated about it?”

“We lost one in the snap.” Steve rubbed the back of his neck. “We didn’t even think about it being a possibility, ya know, that it would come back, and we didn’t know Katie was pregnant back then until after. We’ve got a dating scan tomorrow so we’ll know for sure then.”

“So that time when we were on the low, and she thought she was sick…” Sam frowned, “she he was actually pregnant?”

Steve nodded.

“Not bad chicken?”

Steve shook his head.

“Dude you knocked up your Mrs whilst we were running from the Feds?” Sam’s eyes widened and Steve let out a sigh.

“It wasn’t exactly planned, Sam.” He rolled his eyes.

**** Steve watched his wife for a moment as she sat on the seat opposite him on the private Stark Jet, scribbling on a piece of paper. She was scribing notes for Tony’s Eulogy and her brow was furrowed as she jotted her ideas down, stopping every so often to wipe a stray tear away from her eyes. He leaned over to tuck her hair behind her ear whilst asking if she needed anything and she shook her head, tapping the pen lightly against her teeth. He dropped his hand to her neck, gently squeezed in a sign of affection and stood up to go and check if Bucky need rescuing from Jamie’s incessant chattering.

“You know it doesn’t seem right, any of this.” Katie spoke quietly, as she looked out of the window. Steve watched her for a second before he sat back down and leaned forward, resting his elbows on the small table between them. She turned back to him and sighed. “The world is mourning for Tony, yet the same people who are leaving candles and wreathes and flowers outside the tower don’t seem to give a shit about Natasha. She’s not been mentioned once in the media since the President’s address.” “Sadly, I’m not surprised.” Steve sighed “After we took down SHIELD and all her past secrets were thrown into the spotlight and, well, you know her history. It wasn’t well received. People made assumptions about her, questioned her loyalties, wrongly yes, but they did.” “It’s not fair.” Katie sniffed.

“You’re right, it’s not. It’s unfair and it’s cruel.” Steve nodded, gently reaching out for Katie’s hand. “She gave her life because she believed so firmly that we could succeed and she’s being given no recognition at all. But that’s what today is about. Those of us that did know her, and did care about her, getting the chance to say goodbye properly.”

Katie smiled sadly, her fingers tangling in Steve’s as their hands lay entwined on the table

“And I think she would prefer it this way.” He continued “She was a very private person, unless she was around her friends, her family after all.”

“Yeah.” Katie said, smiling gently. “Maybe you’re right.”

There was a loud yell from the other side of the jet and they both looked over to see Bucky giving Jamie a hi-five as Sam and Emmy leant back in their chairs, throwing their Uno cards onto the table in defeat. Bucky looked up and caught Steve’s eye, flashing him a small wink.

It wasn’t long before they were landing. Katie felt ridiculously queasy as the jet began to descend and no sooner was she on the concrete of the runway than she threw up to the side of the steps. Emmy gave her a suspicious look, but didn’t say anything as she made her way, her hand around Jamie’s, as they followed Sam and Bucky to the waiting cars, Steve patiently hanging back for his wife to compose herself before they set off on the 30 minute or so drive to Clint’s farm.

There were hugs, hand-shakes and a few tears as the group greeted each other. Banner and Wanda had already arrived before the Rogers-Barnes-Wilson clan did, and it wasn’t long until Fury and Hill walked into the large farmhouse. An hour or so later, Okoye and T’Challa landed shortly followed by Rocket, Nebula and Thor. And finally Lang, Rhodey, Pepper, Happy and Morgan. As Katie looked round as her niece shot over to hug her ‘Uncle Spangles’, she suddenly felt a warmth in her chest that where was still so much love in and amongst the grief.

They had an hour or so at the house, Jamie and Nathaniel instantly hitting it off and retreating to Nate’s room, emerging thirty minutes later each with a picture for their Auntie Nat. Katie had crouched down next to her son as he had showed her the picture of the woman with the shock of red hair holding a bar of chocolate because “she always gave me chocolate, Momma.”

“Yeah, yeah she did.” Katie smiled, kissing his cheek.

In the mid-afternoon sun, Clint and Laura, with their three kids, led the way down a worn path which led to a small pond not far from the line of trees that surrounded the farm. Clint explained that Natasha liked it here, she often came to visit and stay if there was a little too much going on in her life to cope with and this was her place which was why the tree was planted here. The tree was roughly six feet high at the moment but was already sporting the deep red leaves they had picked it for, and they all knew that over time it would grow and expand. There was a small wooden bench underneath it, with a brass plaque which sported Natasha’s Black Widow symbol, and they had also ordered a small head stone, but that would not be available for a while.

“It’s beautiful Clint.” Katie nodded, her hand falling to the place just underneath her throat and above her chest. “It really is.” “So,” Clint rubbed his neck, clearing his throat. “I thought, those of us that wanted to could just say a few words and,” he looked around and gave a watery smile as he took in the crowd of people, “you know, seeing you all here reminds me of how Nat came into my life. No friends, no family, no connections, and absolutely no desire to change any of that.” “You got that right.” Fury muttered, drawing a few smiles and soft laughs, including a chuckle from Clint.

“Yet here she is, being celebrated and remembered by all of you, all of us, the people whose lives she’s touched and impacted and I guess, well, she did change it after all.”

Steve gave the archer a smile as he turned to look at the tree, his head bowing slightly “Nat, your last name might have been Romanoff but you’ve been part of the Barton family for as long as we can remember. I watched you break free from the horrors of your youth and learn that life didn’t have to always be painful and cruel. You worked tirelessly to build yourself up and always strived to be a better person. I hope you know that,” he paused and looked upwards, taking a deep shaky breath, “you were worthy of being loved. And we did, we loved you so much, still do. Me, Laura, Coops, Lila and Nate. If it wasn’t for you my family wouldn’t be here, but whilst my heart may have pieced itself back together thanks to them coming home, there’s still a huge hole there where you used to be. And I know that Nate only met you briefly, but he’s gonna know…he’s gonna know all about the woman he’s named after, the bravest woman I have ever known.” He reached out and wiped at his face before his hand gently touched the bark of the tree trunk. “Goodbye, Nat.” At that point Laura stepped forward, her own tears trickling down her cheeks as she wrapped her arms round her husband, their kids all following before Nathanial turned and placed the piece of paper he was holding on the bench, Clint helping him tack it to the back part with a small pin before the stepped back into the crowd.

Almost everyone spoke. Fury and Hill went next, explaining how they had been there from the beginning and watched her as she had transformed from this lethal, master assassin into an Avenger, a leader. And whilst he may not have been so warm to her in the beginning, Fury had come to look at her as a protégée, the person who after Hill and Coulson he trusted the most. And Hill, who had become a friend, one of the first people to join Natasha’s slowly expanding group of confidents in the beginning. Natasha had exceeded any expectations they had of her as a colleague and had been a fiercely loyal friend until the end.

Okoye, Nebula, Rocket, who had only known Nat really for a short time, all respected the woman who was broken and shattered but never gave up wanting to make the world a better place and continually strived to find a way to fix what Thanos had done. They had all forged a friendship with Natasha as they picked up the pieces of a shattered world and strived to keep people safe through the chaos that ensured post snap.

T’Challa, who had seen the fierce loyalty and drive that Natasha possessed first hand, gave a moving short speech, commending her for her courage. “Even if that did mean she knocked me out with a hell of a sting.” He quipped, drawing chuckles from the group. “Her tenacity on the battle field in Wakanda, her strive to protect not only her friends, but billions of strangers, at all costs. An honourable trait.”

Lang, who again hadn’t known her wrong but had found an ally instantly willing to work on his ludicrous Time Heist idea, without whom, “I doubt anyone would have taken me seriously, including Steve” nodded around, and Steve gave him a small smile and a shrug because it was true.

Bucky, who had tried to kill Natasha on more than one occasion, but could empathise with what she had been through more than most, simply placed his metal hand on the bark of the tree and said something in Russian, which he later explained to Steve and Katie had been a simple thank you and goodbye, not being able to think of anything else to say.

Rhodey who had know Nat as long as Katie had, spoke about how he had watched as she stepped up post the snap, helping Steve lead what was left of their group as they tried to help who was left and “bring peace to a world that was in turmoil”.

Pepper who had also known her as long as Katie had, thanks to her infiltration of Stark Industries spoke about how she’d become a good friend over the years, sharing a “mutual annoyance at Tony’s ridiculous antics” and with Katie and later Wanda the women had joined forces in an otherwise male and testosterone swamped Avengers Tower or Compound.

Wanda and Sam, who had both spent years on the run alongside her. She had helped train them both, fought alongside them both, and saved both their lives more times than they cared to remember. They respected her, and counted her amongst their closest friends.

Thor, he trusted her, infinitely, watching her hold her own against opponents both bigger and stronger on many an occasion. She had never once judged him for the sins of his brother, and with a large clap of lightning he had declared her the “most noble and worthy warrior, one of the greatest I have ever seen”

Bruce, who had trusted her more than he had ever trusted anyone was up next, and he took a moment to gather his own thoughts, before he spoke simply and succinctly, but no less emotionally. “There’s a reason that lullaby never worked for anyone else, Nat, and whilst we never got the chance to explore the feelings we had for one another, I loved you. More than as a friend, and want you to know that my time away for those two years I was stuck as the hulk was not your fault, despite what you thought.”

And then, it was Steve’s turn. The soldier cleared his throat, his hand firmly grasped around Katie’s as they both stepped forward, their kids at their side. His chest was horribly tight as he took a deep breath and began to speak. “Clint’s right Nat, you were a pain in the ass. Specifically my ass for years. Constantly laughing at me for being old fashioned, trying to fix me up on dates until you realised that the person I wanted to be with just happened to be one of your best friends, which then opened up a whole other world of opportunity for your sarcasm and wind ups. You were one of the bravest, kindest people I have ever fought alongside, and we both knew that when we made you godmother to Jamie you’d guide him in the best way you could, even if you did take him for the day and fill him with enough e-numbers to make him bounce of the walls when you returned him.”

He sniffed slightly and Katie lay her head against his shoulder, fighting her own tears. “People often pointed to me as the leader of the Avengers, but I wasn’t. Not really. You were the one that held us all together on more than one occasion, especially when me and Tony were ready to rip each other’s heads off. Your ability to see the best in people is something I can only hope to emulate, and we’re going to miss you. We all are. More than you will ever know.” At that point, his voice cracked and Katie could see he was close to breaking, just as Clint had done.

“Emmy, Jamie why don’t you put your picture and your plant on the bench?” She encouraged gently, “Clint, can you?”

Clint nodded and stepped forward with them both as she took the opportunity to wrap her arms around Steve, pulling him in close.

“I drawed this for you.” She heard Jamie say as Clint helped him tack his photo next to Nathaniel’s before he promised Emmy he would plant the tulips in the ground once her headstone was there.

A silence fell before Katie stepped back and looked up at Steve who gave her a nod to assure her he was okay. Then, realising it was her turn she turned to the tree and looked at the shock of red leaves, smiling softly.

“There’s nothing I can say that hasn’t already been said.” Katie smiled gently “You were an amazing person, inside and out. I’ll never forget how you helped me pick an outfit for my first date with Steve and calmed me down despite the nerves that were flooding my entire system.”

“You never told me that.” Steve frowned, causing the crowd around them to laugh.

“Oh it’s true.” Katie nodded with a smile before she turned back to the tree. “All the ribbings and joking you would do, trying to get the ‘inside details’ as you called them on Captain America, but that’s what friends do right? And we were friends, best friends. I knew I wanted to be your friend the first time I met you when you were undercover in Stark Industries and your floored Happy after Tony insisted you ‘go a few rounds’”

“Thanks, Kiddo.” Happy grumbled, drawing more chuckles.

“You helped us so much when Jamie was a baby, taking him when you could see things were getting too much for me as a new mum, telling me that it was normal to feel a little overwhelmed when I simply thought I was doing a bad job. We couldn’t have done it without you and there’s no better friend I could have had by my side through everything we’ve been through together and done over the past thirteen years.”

Katie looked up at the sky, her tears falling now. “You know, on the jet on the way over me and Steve talked about how cruel it was that you’re not getting the recognition for your part in bringing everyone back that you deserve, but then I see everyone here and,” she choked a little on her words and felt Steve’s arm slide around her waist, “you know, it might not be a public mourning but this, this is the evidence that you were loved, and the people that mattered care and will always care and be thankful that you gave your life so that everyone who’s here could live theirs. You were so loved Nat, you always will be, and I can only hope you knew and felt that.”

With that her tears began to fall thickly and she turned to Steve, his arms wrapping around her, his large, strong but ever so gently hands held her close to him, one on the base of her back, the other on her head.

There was a soft breeze which ruffled the leaves of the trees in the otherwise completely calm clearing they were in and no one spoke for a moment, until Clint stated that there were drinks and food waiting at the house. With a last glance over her shoulder at Nat’s tree, Katie allowed Steve to guide her down the path, every so often pressing a soft kiss to her temple.

With drinks and full plates, the guests spilled out into grounds of the Barton farm as animated chat began on and around the porch. Katie stuck to apple juice topped up with lemonade in a wine glass, and when Steve had subtly arched an eyebrow in question at the fact she was drinking she’d flicked him off and shook her head gently causing him to snigger a little.

“So,” Pepper sidled up to her, looking at her, “when are you due?”

“What?” Katie asked, a little too quickly.“I don’t know what you’re-.”

“I know that’s not wine.” Pepper gently cut her off. “And I know that you lost a baby in the snap. Maybe I’m putting two and two together here, but…”

Katie sighed and looked at her sister-in-law. “We only found out the other day. We didn’t wanna say anything, not until the memorials and funerals are over. It doesn’t feel right, to be happy about it all. Even though I can’t help it.” “Are you kidding me?” Pepper smiled “Katie, its great news. Something positive to look forward to.”

“Literally” Katie mumbled causing Pepper to grin.

“I knew it!” Emmy’s voice spluttered and Katie groaned and turned to face her. “The baby, it came back?”

“Shhhh” Katie hurriedly quieted her. “We haven’t told anyone yet.”

“Why not?”

“Because we don’t know how far along we are or,” Katie pinched the bridge of her nose. “just not yet Emmy okay? And this isn’t how we wanted you to find out. We were gonna tell you tomorrow after the scan.”

Emmy cocked her head to one side and shrugged, draining the glass of ice tea she was holding before she smiled and wrapped her arms round her mother, the sixteen year old now being almost as tall as she was. “I think it’s great.” Katie smiled and lay her head against her daughters, squeezing her back. “Yeah, yeah it is.”

***** Katie was exhausted after the day’s events and so, once the kids were settled she left the men drinking in the kitchen and headed for a bath. Steve and Bucky had been drinking the Asgardian stuff all afternoon thanks to Thor bringing a load with him to Clint’s and both the soldiers had been feeling the effects before they headed home, and still were thanks to the stash Steve had in the cabinet and beer fridge.

“You know,” Sam leaned back in his chair, “when you find out how far gone Katie is tomorrow, we’re gonna be able to figure out a point of conception.” “Yeah that’s generally how it works.” Steve rolled his eyes.

“Well you better not have made that baby on my plane.”

“We never had sex on the jet.” Steve sighed.

“No, just dirty old warehouses in the middle of a mission.” Sam shot back.

“Did you have to bring that up?” Steve said exasperatedly.

“Oh now this I gotta hear.” Bucky grinned and turned to look at Sam.

“They left their coms on.” Sam mumbled “Trust me you don’t gotta…”

Bucky gave a loud bark of a laugh as Steve groaned.

“We just got caught up and…” He suddenly stopped, deciding he didn’t have to explain himself. Why the fuck should he? “You know what, I don’t care, have you seen her? I’d bang her every second of the day if I could, she’s fucking gorgeous.”

“Aww thanks baby, but five times in one night was quite enough thanks.” Katie said and all three men whipped round to face her as she quirked an eyebrow smirking, leaning in the doorway dressed as usual in a pair of shorts and one of his shirts. “It was one hell of a wedding night.”

“Five times?” Sam looked at Steve who flushed bright red, but couldn’t help but feel slightly smug.

“And that’s how many times we did it.” She continued as she walked to the fridge to pull out a bottle of water, turning to wink at Steve “Not how many times he made me see stars.”

Sam gave a loud laugh as Bucky grinned, a dirty snigger escaping from his mouth.

“I think I liked it better when you hated each other.” Steve said, glaring at them.

“Aww they picking on you baby?” Katie slid her arms round his neck from behind. He nodded, his hands rubbing over her forearms as they locked at the front of his chest.

“Big time.” He pouted.

“Come to bed and I’ll make it better.” She whispered into his ear and he turned as she straightened up and headed back out of the room. “Night boys.”

There was a pause as Steve looked at Bucky who was chuckling to himself, clearly having overheard.

“I’m gonna,” Steve watched Katie leave, and with that he drained his beer, stood up and headed after her.

Bucky eyed the bottle of alcohol in his hand before he turned to Sam. “Wanna go for a walk, find a bar? I’m in the mood for exploring my old neighbourhood a little.”

“Damned straight.” Sam nodded, standing up “The night is young Frosty. Unlike you.”

“Fuck off.” Bucky shot back, grabbing his jacket and smiling as he felt the leather in his flesh hand.

“Buck, you got a sec?” Katie asked, just before they were about to leave for the airfield.

Bucky paused and looked at Steve who simply gave him a smile. “She’s got something for you.” he said, ushering the kids down the hall with easy commands and large hands.

Bucky made his way into the living room and his mouth turned into a smile as Katie held out his leather jacket, the one he had wrapped her in when he pulled her from the Hydra base in La Ronde what felt like a life time ago.

“I believe this is yours.”

“You kept it?” he said gently.

“Of course I did. I just never had chance to give it you back until now.”

He took it from her, gently running his hand over the collar.

“I also never got chance to thank you for that day, what you did.”

“Anyone would have done the same.” Bucky shrugged, rubbing at the back of his neck in an action that reminded her very much of Steve.

“You sure?” Katie gave him a soft smile. “You headed deep into a base full of people who had once hurt you because someone was screaming for help. Someone, and you had no idea it was me. And even if you did, you didn’t know me. Not really.”

“No, but I knew what those bastards were capable of.” Bucky eyed her gently. “I wouldn’t ever leave anyone to suffer at their hands. I just wish I’d gotten there sooner.”

“Did Steve tell you what they did?” She asked gently.

“He doesn’t need to.” Bucky looked down.“Like I said, I know what they’re, what they were capable of.” “You’re a good man James Barnes.” She gave him a soft smile and then stepped forward to give him a hug. “You saved my life. And for that I’ll always be grateful, and so will Steve.”

Bucky smiled slightly as she slipped on the jacket and headed after Sam as they gently left the house, the door closing behind them.

*****

Upstairs, Steve’s hands were already all over his wife, gentle, strong, loving as he softly caressed her stomach, the place his baby was growing. He nuzzled into her neck as she preened at his touch, arching her back. She moved slightly so he could pull the shirt over her head before he gently took her face in his hands, thumbs skating over her cheekbones.

“I hope it’s a girl,” he whispered gently, dropping a kiss to her lips, “and she looks just like her momma.”

“Charmer.” She grinned as he kissed her again, the kiss growing urgent, Steve flicking his tongue over his wife’s lips before he moved to gently trail his mouth down her neck to the spot in between her collar bone, giving it a gentle nip and a suck. It was a well-practiced dance between the pair of them. After ten years of being with one another they both knew the spots to hit, the places to touch, the parts to tease that would undo the other. It was a familiarity, but one that would never get old. Steve would never tire of the way her finger tips trailed down his back, nails gently biting his skin as she made those delectable noises by his ear. Katie would never tire of the way Steve would softly trail every curve of her body, his hands and strong arms cradling her as he lavished affection on her that drove into her very soul, his mouth gently nipping at her neck, his gentle praises that made her keen with affection.

“I love you baby girl, you’re so good to me, so good.” The soft sheets of the bed rustled around them as Steve gently rocked into his wife, causing her to sigh and lay her head back, gazing up at him with a love and lust so deep it almost hurt him to see. He had never been worthy of this love, and never would be. But all he could do was love her back, the way he did, with every single breath he had.

His movements were slow, his hand gently moved to hook her leg around him, finding a deeper seat as he rocked forwards and back again and again, driving deep against her spot as her hands hooked around his neck, pulling him down to kiss her, deeply, softly as she moaned into his mouth.

“Come on baby,” he said gently, his lips moving to her neck, “atta girl, come on.”

Her back arched and her nails dug into the skin of his biceps as she leaned forward slightly, burying her head into the crook of his shoulder to muffle her cries as she came, tightening around him. He upped his pace, ever so slightly, chasing his own release and he came, his lips pressed to hers, a deep, satisfied moan bubbling from his throat into her mouth as his hips stuttered and he rest his forehead against hers, gathering his breath. He suddenly realised he was led on top of her, his baby in her stomach and he went to move but she caught him softly, her hands straying to his shoulders as she smiled at him, her hands gently moving to rake up through his hair as she pressed a soft kiss to his mouth before she nipped his lip and he practically growled at her.

“Keep doing that,” he muttered “and I’ll be hard again in about five seconds flat.” “I’m counting on it.” She smirked, kissing him again.

*****

“I’m sorry, say that again?” Katie looked at Dr Kellet. The woman smiled and glanced back at her.

“Ten weeks.” She nodded “Give or take. Which makes your due date, roughly the 1st June”

Katie glanced at Steve who was frowning and she knew instantly what was bothering him. He was concerned about the fact she had been pregnant in the fight, and was worried that the snap would have done some lasting damage. Katie wasn’t as concerned, for some inexplicable reason she knew everything was okay and had instead diverted his attention to researching second pregnancies… which he had done with gusto.

The kids were in bed, Bucky and Sam were, actually, Katie had no idea where they were, not that it mattered, they were grown men. They were led on the couch, Katie down one side of the L shape, Steve on the other with his head in his wife’s lap as he glanced at the screen on his phone.

“It says here that you should feel them move sooner than the first time because you know what they feel like…” Steve said, grinning up at her. “Wonder if that means I’ll feel them sooner too?” Katie shrugged, smiling as she ran her hand through Steve’s hair. “No idea.”

“And you’ll carry it lower.” He continued. “Which according to this is a good thing as you’ll breathe easier and eat much more comfortably than you did last time. Although you might be doing the whole constant needing to pee thing sooner, but on the plus side labour is faster.” “Oh joy.” Katie sighed, her nails scratching his scalp slightly.

“And it says here you’re likely to start showing sooner.” A huge grin spread across his face. “I can’t wait!” He shifted slightly so that he was led on his stomach and his head crept under her T-shirt and his nose gently skimmed her lower belly. “Although last time when you started showing, it just looked like you’d eaten too many cheeseburgers…” Katie nipped his arm causing him to yelp out a laugh.

“Are you sure everything is okay?” Steve asked, drawing Katie out of her memories. “Because well, the snap and…”

Dr Kellet smiled and nodded “Your baby is perfectly healthy and normal, everything is perfect.”

Steve nodded, the worry he had instantly felt ebbing from his system and Katie gently laced her fingers between his and glanced back at the screen.

“Ten weeks…” she sighed “How on Earth did I not notice I was that far gone?”

Steve gently kissed the back of her hand. “Honey it doesn’t matter, don’t think on it. Don’t think on any of it.”

“I’ll get you a few copies of the photo.” Dr Kellet nodded.

“Have you had many others in, like this I mean?” Katie asked as the Doctor wiped the cold gel off her stomach “I mean, that have had babies back or…” “You’re the sixth one I’ve seen since everyone came back.” she smiled “Who knew?”

“Could be problematic,” Katie mused “I mean like, what if they are already pregnant again, or like, I dunno, dead against having kids now or…” “Katie…” Steve chuckled “Shut up.”

****

Armed with the two scan photos they headed home and were greeted by an excited Jamie who dragged the pair of them into the living room where he had been building a rocket out of lego with Bucky’s help.

“Everything okay?” Sam looked up from where he as prodding at Katie’s tablet, reading the news.

“Yeah,” Katie smiled, and she looked at Steve who grinned at his friends.

“Roughtly Ten weeks.” He answered the unasked question and Sam frowned.

“Ten weeks…” He mumbled as he did the same maths they had done in the car, a huge shit eating grin crossing his face. “So it was that time on the mission!”

“It’s kinda funny really.” Katie smirked. “Both of them were made through some pretty wild loving up against a wall.” Steve let out a sigh and he shot his wife a filthy look as both Bucky and Sam roared with laughed.

“What was against a wall?” Jamie asked, looking up at her and Steve let out a low groan.

“We’ll give you a minute.” Bucky smiled, standing up as he headed into the kitchen, followed by Sam, both passing Emmy who was returning with a drink for her and Jamie.

“Come here.” Katie settled on the couch and pat the seat next to her. Jamie scrambled up and ran over, jumping up beside her. Steve sat on the other side of him, and Emmy perched on the corner cushion. Katie looked over at Steve who smiled and turned so he was facing his son slightly.

“We have some news, buddy. Some good news.” He gently ran his hand over Jamie’s head “Your mom’s gonna have another baby.” “You’re gonna be a big brother.” Katie smiled as he turned to look up at her, his eyes wide.

“A baby?”

“Yeah.” Katie nodded.

“Isn’t that cool?” Emmy grinned and Jamie nodded before he frowned slightly before he looked back at his dad.

“Where is it?”

“It’s in your momma’s tummy.” Steve answered.

Jamie looked at Katie for a moment, before his frown deepened. “How did it get in there?”

Steve hesitated for a moment, his neck and cheeks flushing as he desperately thought about how he could explain this in a way that was suitable for a three year old’s ears. “Well, I…” “It got there because we’re a family.” Katie cut in, smiling. “And me and your dad love each other very much, so it’s kinda something that happens.”

“Oh.” Jamie nodded, and Steve shot his wife a smile as Jamie grinned. “So when is it gonna be here?”

“Not till early next year.” Katie smiled.

“Is it a boy or a girl?”

“We dunno yet pal.” Steve smiled.

“I hope it’s a boy.” Jamie nodded decisively. Katie smiled at Steve before Jamie quipped up again “But I’m not sharing my room or my toys. I don’t like people touching my stuff.”

**** O/S: To The Stars And Back

Chapter 60

**Original Posting**

#stark spangled banner #steve rogers #steve rogers fanfiction #steve rogers fic #Katie Stark #steve rogers x ofc #steve rogers x original female character #mcu #mcu fanfic #chris evans #chris evans characters

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papers4me · 4 years ago

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Fruits Basket, Se03. ep 5,(part 1)

In part 1 of this post, more than analyzing, I want to understand few confusing things first. I’m not annoyed or angry, I’m just confused & trying to piece things together, so, kindly don’t feel off with my usage of (!!!) & (???). lol. I’ll ONLY discuss two things here that confuse me a lot. ( Real ep review/ analysis will be in part 2)

1- Momiji’s romantic love for tohru (the real love triangle). What?!!!!!

I’m so shocked that momiji loves tohru romantically! So, in order to understand ( where did this come from!!) I re-visited his scenes with tohru since se01 & trying to see if I missed anything! Below is my speculations:

Is it love at first sight?!!! When Momiji first met tohru he kissed her on the cheek. I’ve always thought lightly that in the eyes of the reserved Japanese (bowing is greeting), all Europeans (kissing on the check is greeting). hence, Momiji’s kiss, he’s half Europea. However, perhaps it is a Kureno/ Arisa type of love at 1st sight/kiss?! kureno nearly kissed Arisa on the lips on their 1st official meeting. But Kureno/Arisa kiss was meant to be romantic/sexual with adult kureno’s “ I wanted to taste her lips”. but Momiji’s is a peak on the cheek & he was a child, so... I don’t think he’s struck by love before he’s officially introduced to us the audience.

Is it gradual growing love like kyo’s ? in all Momiji/ tohru eps, he always just wanted to play with her, visit places & spend time together. (hot spring & beach vacation) are his own ideas. But momiji didn’t want tohru exclusively. He intentionally invited both yuki & kyo to the hot spring & even was begging kyo to come. He invited all zodiacs to the beach & wanted all to spend time together. I believe that the hot spring ep especially showed momiji as this playful, innocent & naive kid, wanting to share tohru’s females’ hot spring section. I don’t think momiji was madly in love at that time. He was a child going “ waaaa~, kyo hit me” & jumping here & there.

So, summer vacation? but then again, Momiji slept with the children & tohru doted on them all. He defended tohru but they all defend her & love her. he said to kyo that he “selfishly wanted to be with tohru” but I didn’t catch any romantic hints from that. Was it really that time?? they all wanted to spend time with tohru. Yuki said “ I’ll kidnap you”, kyo agreed to go to the beach right away, kisa was glued to her to the point of annoying hiro! So, when? & why not let us as the audience know abt momiji’s feelings.

Is it related to opening up to tohru abt his family issues? He confessed to tohru abt his dad, mom & momo. She cried for him & hugged him. I never got the feeling in all those scenes that he was in love! it seemed to me like friendship love similar to hana’s/Arisa’s or siblings love substituting his nonexistent relationship with momo.

Is it just me?? I always saw momiji as this baby in toddler clothes, jumping, laughing & a ray of sunshine! A child but with the most mature heart & mind. Tohru didn’t help momiji, he was already helping himself first & reaching healthy conclusions abt how he should deal with his own traumas. So, perhaps (Me) not seeing him as a teenager stopped me from seeing his romantic love? but they showed me hiro/kisa’s love. Elementary school kids! so?

Regardless of when he fell in love or how, the point is, this is heart-breathtakingly tragic! cuz (a) tohru never saw him more than a child at first, then as a precious friend, (b) she’s intensely in love with kyo, which brings us to tohru’s core issues. (Tohru loosing yet another loved one). Tohru’s own issues aren’t fully explored yet, but her love for kyo has been blatantly hammered to us since se01 finale! this is because kyo being locked in the cat room equals (death) which parallels her mom’s (death). Tohru will be living her tragic trauma again but this time, kyo replacing kyoko! Thus, giving tohru a room for growth & character development.Tohru’s intense love for kyo was shown in by the drastic change in her attitude in se01, ep.24, chasing firmly after him even when he pushed her & refusing to let go until he’s back home cuz she wants to! then yuki blatantly saying “ she loves him, too, the way she looks at him“ im se02, ep22 & “don’t worry, tohru, he won’t accept (the other girls confession)” in se02, ep 17 & all her scenes with kyo in that ep where she’s scared he’ll let go of her & other scenes throughout the 3 seasons.

...so why momiji’s impossible & unrequited love is introduced?

I believe it is to push kyo to not let go of tohru. To throw kyo into this internal conflict between selflessly letting go of tohru so she could be happy (like hatori did with kana) & selfishly wanting her to be his lover ( like haru). Kyo himself expressed these two conflicting thoughts in se02, ep, 9 “ I hoped we could always be together somewhere far off (selfish love) & “ I don’t want to take anything from you (selfless love). So, momiji is challenging kyo in a way making him realize that selfish love might not be bad afterall & selfless love could be harmful! cleverly reversing the two concepts. So, I get why this love triangle was introduced. but whyyyy momiji! T_T.. choose someone else, Writer-San! poor Momiji we learned abt his love the same ep we learned it hopeless & he can’t pursue! T_T. couldn’t you at least put the two scenes far away, so I get time to grieve his broken heart! T_T.

2- Yuki/Machi ( Yuki is in a such hurry!!!!)

You could use the analogy of yuki’s starting the story as a (baby/child) taken cared by his mother (tohru) who taught him to be a person (all se01), Yuki took this knowledge as a (kid/teenager) & formed friendship on his own with (kakeru) in (se02). it is not after yuki became a true equal friend to kakeru, chocking him & equally teasing him, that Machi was allowed to talk abt her self as a real character with agency & thoughts (se02, ep24), now yuki must be a (teenager/Man) & fall romantically in love, hence (se03, eps 2 & 3). All this is amazing. So, I kinda expected the following:

yuki won’t take as long as kyo in confessing/ realizing romantic love since he/machi don’t have a shared baggage nor obstacles from the past.

he won’t be as fast as haru’s “ i love you/ kiss/ make love”. But then again, Haru & Isuzu have already known each other for years & are already in love, they just put a name to their desires & went on with it.

So, yuki should be in the middle, noticing, knowing abt the person, crushing, then realizing love & wanting a future together! Cuz yuki is this type of person who values taking time thinking thoroughly, right??

I’m confused as yuki wanted to confess the curse & to be with machi romantically right after the machi background scene? I know not everything should be on-screen & him falling slowly in love could be off-screen... the flower is a yuki/machi “ noticing her stage”, her fighting with him over the red leaf is “ noticing him stage” for her. but there’s only ONE intimate scene of them together! Her raw tears when he comforted her in her flat (the chalk scene is bonus). but.. I never expected that yuki is planning to confess his curse & feelings this early!!!!!! yuki! are you SURE she loves you? ( I mean we the audience know 100%) but how is HE sure?? yuki going this big stage so soon felt a bit un-yuki. but then agin, perhaps that’s part of the new changed confident yuki? I duno, I mean Machi was never given a proper time to prosper, but yuki was always given all the time there is to explore his feelings & even other ppl’s feelings! He’s there in kyo/tohru ‘s story to tells the audience they’re in love, he’s there in Isuzu/ haru to mend their gap. I mean yeah there gotta be more scenes abt them for sure, we’re in ep 5, but I never expected a the intruppted confession now & this soon!

perhaps it’s just me, again?! Maye I’m so invested in yuki & accustomed to him always taking time that I kinda expected more before he’s thinking of confessing. I really thought that confessing his curse/love is yuki/machi’s own story climax compared to kyo/tohru’s story climax with kyoko & Isuzu/Haru story climax after breakup, oh well. I’m positive we’ll see more of yuki’s journey with machi as yuki is rarely absent in any eps. More scenes to come!

That’s the end of my headache! XD. I apologize for giving you headache if you were kind enough to read all this. kindly, don’t spoil future scenes or sub-plots to me. I’m just expressing my shock at how fast the plot moved! just few eps ago, I was watching motoko love journey that survived 3 seasons! Hands down Motoko wins in furuba! XD. Jokes aside, Can I say we’re officially where “the plot thickens?” Is it going down? This ep felt like a bullet train!

Side Notes:

I never liked the “children in deep love theme” that hiro has as children shouldn’t suffer the romantic pining & suffering as teenagers & adult ppl, so, I really appreciated that Momimi altho was 15 when we 1st saw him, lived his childhood without the “oh my! I’m so in love~ pining~ suffer”.

The story introduced ( momoiji in romantic love) the same ep Momiji got tall, so making it as sth he expressed once he hit puberty like most boys his age. He even said it “ I’m a man now”, which is again sth boys feel once they get taller & experience other feelings.

Momiji never catches a break! T_T. My son is denied the types of love he wants (parental love, sibling love & now romantic love! ).

I don’t picture momiji/tohru together as a couple cuz it wasn’t built that way in the story & most of their moments weren’t romantic/sexual tension. to me it was the ultimate friendship!

I wish my son finds love on-screen! If Moyoko/Nao gets on-screen love, give my boy on-screen love, too!

Nah~ forget that~ I’m just sad for my son, I don’t want to see him paired with any character quickly to compensate him not having tohru. This is not doing momiji justice. So, I get the ED art of him with Momo.

If kyo has someone who loves him one-sidedly (Kagura), tohru now has someone who love her one-sidedly (momiji).

The kagura/kyo confrontation was heart breaking, but it had to happen cuz kyo knew she loved him & had to stop her. I hope Momiji never confesses to tohru, I wouldn’t be able to survive seeing tohru turn him down.Tohru & momiji are just too kind for such sad situation.

So, does this mean that the two characters with unrequited love are Kagura & momiji? they’re the only characters with no romantic partner in the ED.

Hana is without a lover in the ED, too! XD. Thank God! I love her crush on kazuma, cuz hello~ who won’t crush on this hunk! & teenage girls can crush on grown up men rather than boys (I know I did, but it was just my girlish crush). I’m thankful it is just a crush & teasing kyo tactics & not true romance! don’t give me another Arisa/Kureno, plz. lol.

#Fruits Basket #Anime Only #confused paper #momiji sohma

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supernatural-jackles · 5 years ago

Text

The Man on the Side of the Road - Part 8

Title: The Man on the Side of the Road - Part 8

Pairing: Dean x Reader

Word Count: 4,932

Warnings: Minor Angst, Lots of Fluff, Playing with their hair, did I mention Fluff?

Summary: Driving down the road, going well over the speed limit. You come across a man walking in the opposite direction with a bouquet of flowers in his hands. His head cast down as he walked. Your gut instinct is telling you to check on this man, no matter what your parents told you growing up. Little did you know just how much this would change your life.

The Man on the Side of the Road - Masterlist

Square Filled: Bed Sharing ( @spngenrebingo)

A/N: I think y’all are going to like this one! Lots of fluff to make up for the angsty last part! As always, feedback is incredibly appreciated ( seriously thank you for it!) Happy reading!!

“Alright, beef jerky?” Dean called out from the list he had in his hand.

“Check,” you shouted back.

“Potato chips?”

“Got it.”

“And finally, my best friend?” he smiled widely, looking over the top of the car to see you. You shook your head with a wide smile.

“I’m right here, dork,” you giggled. “I think we’re road trip ready, don’t you? I didn’t get up at six in the morning for nothing, Dean.”

“I think we’re ready too,” he nodded. “We’ve got a long road ahead of us today. We’re stopping later tonight. We’re staying in a cheap motel and we’ll be back on the road in the morning.”

“I like that plan,” you stated. “Let’s get this show on the road shall we?”

You and Dean were on the open road within minutes. All the doors to your home were locked. You had your security system triple checked. No one knew you were leaving town but Bobby, and he was going to check on your house every day. He was more than happy to let Dean have the week off to go with you on the road trip. You both needed it. You needed to have that breath of fresh air. You needed to get away from everything for a little while.

Since the night you had a full on breakdown, you and Dean had been closer than ever. You felt so much closer to him and it was a strange feeling for you. You never felt that way with Ketch. Not even in the beginning when everything was so fresh and new. You never felt like you fully knew who he was and what he was about. You knew things about Dean that no one knew. You shared things with him that you had never shared with anyone. It made you wonder if it was weird for him too. If he liked how close you had grown in the time you knew each other.

“I’m feeling pizza for dinner,” Dean brought up about an hour into the drive.

“I could go for some pizza,” you nodded. “With everything on it.”

“Everything?” he cocked his eyebrow. “Now you are definitely my kind of girl.”

“Speaking of girl,” you licked your bottom lip. You had to know. “When are you going to ask that girl out? You know, the one you told me about?”

“I don’t know,” he shrugged. “I don’t really know if I’m going to. Yeah, it’d be great to put myself out there again and all. I have no idea if she even likes me back, or if she’d ever go out with me in the first place. I don’t want to push myself back with all the progress I’ve made so far.”

“That’s a good point,” you nodded. “But you’re going to have to put yourself out there sometime. The girl isn’t going to wait forever if she does like you back. As soon as she thinks you’ve lost interest, she’ll move on. I know you said you’re not a long term kind of guy but it could be worth a shot.”

“I’m not. But I don’t know, maybe this time I should give it a try. I’m older now. The sounds of settling down don’t scare me nearly as much as they used to. I guess I have you to thank for that one.”

“Why me?”

“Because of the whole you thought you were pregnant,” he said nonchalantly. “The idea of having a kid of your own, and starting a family with someone sounds a lot better than it did years ago. But I want what you said. Two parents that love each other to raise the baby.”

“Sounds to me like you want a future,” you pointed out.

“Yeah. I do,” he agreed. “Something more, you know?”

“I say take a chance,” you breathed out. “You never know what could happen. Besides, I know you. Any girl would be lucky to be with you.”

“Thanks, Y/N,” he smiled. “What about you? I know you haven’t really been single for all that long, but have you considered putting yourself out there?”

“The more I think about it, I’ve been by myself for a lot longer. After all, Ketch and Jo have been fooling around for two years behind my back. We weren’t like most couples. People wouldn’t say oh you guys are so cute together and that shit. Ketch was and has always been closed off. He wasn’t open with me the same way I was him. We didn’t have a good solid relationship when I think about the kind of relationship I want to pursue in the future. It wasn’t even about sex for me. And to be honest, Ketch and I didn’t really sleep together all that often the more I think about it. Our last few months before our wedding was probably the most we were together. Probably because of Jo. As much as there was wrong with our relationship, I know it won’t be the same with someone else. I know that I’ll meet someone and things will just click,” you paused. “I’ll be able to have sex with the lights on, and I’ll be able to say no when I’m not in the mood and have him respect me. I’ll be able to cry and he won’t freak out, and I’ll be able to make him laugh when he needs it. I was so afraid of so many things when I was with Ketch, because I knew he’d leave me, and I didn’t want my mom to say the horrible things that she already has to me. I’ve accepted now that I’m never going to be good enough for her and I don’t care that I’m not. I would much rather be with someone who loved me for who I am. Someone who doesn’t care that I don’t get along with her and understands why. I don’t want that same unrealistic expectations the next time around.”

“Your mom really shouldn’t matter all that much anyways. No offense but she’s a bitch,” he chuckled.

“You’re not wrong about that one,” you let out a laugh. “Someday I’ll put myself out there again. I just want to be one hundred percent sure that I know the person I’m going for this time around. Someone that doesn’t have hidden agendas, or girls he likes to fuck behind my back.”

“Can I ask you who this Jo chick is?” he cocked his eyebrow, looking over at you for a split second.

“Jo Harvelle -”

“You have to be fucking kidding me,” he said loudly.

“Oh god, you know her too?” your jaw dropped.

“Yeah, I do. Quite well actually,” he stated. “When I was growing up, my dad brought me around the garage a lot so he could show me the ropes of a car. At the time, my Uncle Bobby was dating her mom so Jo was around quite a bit in the summertime. Her mom and Bobby didn’t last too long thankfully. Bobby met a really nice woman and he’s been with her for ten years, I want to say. When school started back up again, Jo thought we were friends and it stayed like that for awhile. It was fine for the most part. Awkward at best. When we were in high school, she made it known that she had a crush on me. Flirting in the hallway. Trying to sit with me at lunch. She forced herself on me at a party after she had too much to drink, and I had to leave. She and Ketch were pretty close in high school too from what I remember. Which is why I couldn’t understand why she was chasing after me. She’s younger, and I saw her like a kid sister. She was always looking for male attention.”

“Figures. She slept around a lot when we were friends. I thought it was her way of dealing with things after her mom died. Everytime we went out, she took someone home. Never thought it would be my at the time fiancee,” you told him. “The more I think about everything that’s happened over time, the more I wish I had realized what was going on. I wish I would have picked up on how poorly Ketch treated me, and done something about it. I wish I would have realized that Jo wasn’t really a friend to me. I wish I would have paid more attention, and knew my worth more than I did.”

“But you know it now, and you’re not in the situation with either of them anymore,” he reminded you. “You have me looking out for you now, and I’m not going to let you go through something like that again. And, I’m not going to steal your boyfriend either.”

“Haha!” you giggled. “Funny!”

“It was a little funny,” he smirked. “I mean it though. I’ve got your back, if you decide you want to try again with someone else. You seem to be doing much better since our talk last week.”

“I feel a lot better since we talked,” you admitted. “It’s hard for me to open up, I know that. I never wanted to be too much for you either. You are already going through so much as it is. Talking to you is easy. I like talking to you about everything. The big things. The little things too. You give me a sense of home.”

“You can always talk to me,” he assured you.

It wasn’t too long after that when your eyes began to grow tired. You knew that if you rested on the door, you’d feel every bump. You decided to take a chance. After all, you and Dean were close. You wouldn’t be able to sleep otherwise. He was a safe driver and the backseat was free for the most part.

“I’m going to see if I can get some sleep,” you yawned. “You mind if I crawl in the back?”

“If you want,” he nodded. “Or you can rest your head in my lap. My leg might be a little more comfortable than the bags back there.”

“You wouldn’t mind?”

“Nah. I’d rather you be comfortable,” he smiled. “‘Sides, I’ll play with your hair every once in a while. Help you relax.”

“Do you want to marry me?” you joked.

“In a heartbeat,” he winked. “I’ll change routes to Vegas.”

“It’d be the best wedding ever,” you giggled.

“Get some sleep, sweetheart. I’ll keep you safe.”

__________________________

You had no idea how long you were asleep for. What you woke up to was Dean running his fingers through your hair as he hummed along with the quiet radio. You couldn’t help but smile. You were more than content with your life at that moment. It made you wonder if there was a chance that you and Dean could be something more. More than roommates and friends. You got along well, and you had a good chemistry between the two of you. You could see yourself with someone like him. The real question was, could he see himself with someone like you? Did he like you in the same way you liked him?

You shifted in his lap, adjusting yourself a little. Dean still continued to run his fingers through the locks of your hair. It made you wonder if he liked it just as much as you did. If he would be okay with you doing the same to him.

“Sweetheart, are you awake?” Dean asked softly.

“Maybe,” you chuckled. “You need something?”

“I’m going to pull over at the next gas station. We need gas, and I’m probably going to pee myself if we wait any longer,” he admitted.

“Okay. How long was I asleep?” you asked him, yawning in the process.

“About three hours,” he revealed.

“Oh my god. I’m sorry!” you breathed out.

“Don’t worry about it. You’re a pretty sound sleeper. I’d rather you rest,” he half smiled.

“Thank you for letting me sleep in your lap, and for playing with my hair,” you told him.

“You won’t be thanking me when you see what your hair looks like,” he let out a laugh. You sat up instantly, looking in the rearview mirror. Some of your hair was sticking up a little. Nothing you couldn’t fix. You’d much rather his hand in your hair anyways. It was the most comforting feeling.

“I think this is a good look for me,” you giggled. “Why don’t I drive after our pit stop? Give you a chance to nap.”

“Yeah okay,” he nodded. “I trust you enough to drive my car.”

“Gee thanks,” you shook your head with a side smile.

Dean stopped at the closest gas and sip. He pumped the gas first before heading in to use the bathroom. You sat in the car, checking your phone to see how much further along you were until you arrived to Sam. It was still a long drive, and you wouldn’t be there until tomorrow night at the earliest. You knew all the travel was going to knock you out.

Dean came out of the gas and sip with a paper bag in his hand. You wondered just what he could have picked up in there when you had a lot of stuff in the car already. You slid over to the drivers side, allowing Dean to sit in the passengers.

“Alright, I’m hungry so I picked up a little something from the diner they had in there. I’ve got fries, pie, and two burgers. Figured you’d be hungry too.”

“Thanks Dean,” you smiled. “I am actually. It’s going to be a while on the road. We’re not pulling over until eight if we’re going to get there by tomorrow.”

You were on the road, eating your burgers and fries. Dean gave you a couple of bites of his pecan pie, feeding it to you from the fork while you drove. Eventually, he decided he was going to shut his eyes for a little while. That’s when you offered your lap for him to sleep this time. You took the chance to run your fingers through his hair, just like he did you.

Being on the open road with nothing but the soft sounds of one of his cassette tapes playing, and his head in your lap, gave you a lot of time to think about everything. Dean had been a part of your life for a little over two months now. The more you thought about it, the more you realized that time had flown by. Dean was a big part of your life, and you wanted him to be an even bigger part of your life. You wanted to wake up next to him everyday. He was the one you looked forward to coming home to, and spending time with. He saw sides of you that no one else saw. The sides you didn’t want anyone else to see. You just wondered if he saw you as more than a friend. If he ever could see you as someone he wanted to be with.

You knew more about him than a lot of people did. At least, you liked to think you did. Dean clearly didn’t share a whole lot, and he shared quite a bit with you when he became more comfortable with you. You knew he didn’t have many people in his life, and if he did, they clearly didn’t stick around long enough. You couldn’t quite understand why. Dean was easy to get along with, and he made damn sure he was there when someone he cared about needed him. Dean had been there for you more times than you could count. Maybe it was the same for everyone else, and they just never did the same for him. You had no idea what happened between him and his brother. You just hoped they could fix things on this trip.

“You’re comfortable,” Dean muttered, making you laugh.

“Thanks, Dean.”

“How long was I asleep?” he asked.

“Two hours or so,” you answered.

“Sweet,” he yawned, sitting up from your lap. He rubbed at his eyes a little, trying to wipe away the sleep. You had about an hour left to go before you were in Boulder. “You tired of driving yet?”

“Eh. It’s only three in the afternoon. If you want me to drive further, I can. The sooner we get to Sam, the better, right?”

“Yeah that’s true. I’ll let you drive for a couple more hours, then we’ll switch. Whenever you want to switch let me know,” he offered.

“Yeah I will.”

It was just after eight thirty when you pulled into the parking lot of a motel. If your mother could see you and where you were staying for the night, she would throw a fit. She wouldn’t be caught dead in a place like this. It almost made you smile to think about it. It reminded you of how much you weren’t like her. How different you were was one of the things you were proud of. This didn’t bother you one bit and that was because you were doing this with someone you deeply cared about.

Dean had gotten the key to the room while you ran to grab something to eat for dinner from the restaurant across the street. You managed to grab a pizza with a bunch of toppings like you talked about earlier, and some drinks. Dean was waiting for you outside the room with the keys in his hand.

The room wasn’t anything special. For eighty five dollars a night, it wasn’t the worst. There was only one bed and it was pretty small for a queen. If anything, it looked like a double. Not that it mattered all that much. You and Dean had shared a bed a few times before. It was nothing new. You were just going to be a little closer than you were at home. You were going to have to be more respectful of his space.

“When I was growing up, my dad liked to take me and my brother on road trips like this. Time for us to spend together. Since we lost our mom so young, he knew it was important to spend time together. Granted, my dad and my brother never saw eye to eye. I always had to share a bed with one of them, because they refused to look at each other until we moved on from wherever we were. But this just reminds me of those good times growing up. I’ve never really had anyone to do something like this with.”

“I know you said you’re not big on commitment, but did you ever have a girlfriend that you did little road trips with?” you asked.

“Nah, we stayed in town. The girls I’ve been with weren’t into seedy motel rooms and long trips in the car,” he shrugged. “What about you and douchewad?”

“Once thankfully,” you chuckled. “Spring break, freshman year of college. He thought it would be a good idea to head down to Miami. He also thought it would be a good idea to have six shots of tequila with no chaser and he passed out. He refused to go to the beach because he hated sand and he would only eat out of five star restaurants. On spring break, you would be lucky to find one. He complained the entire time that he was going to get an infection or disease. He wouldn’t be caught dead in a motel like this. He and my mother were more alike in that way.”

“And stuff like this motel room doesn’t bug you?” he furrowed his brows.

“No. Not really,” you shook your head. “I’ve never been that kind of girl. But if I see one bug, be prepared for me to freak out. I don’t do bugs of any kind.”

“Okay,” he smiled. “I have to say. I’m really happy you’re not with Ketch anymore. I don’t think you would have lived your life to the fullest if you married him.”

“Me either. I certainly wouldn’t have done any road trips like this. Or been allowed to talk to you. As upset as I was when I found out about him and Jo, and everything that happened. It’s given me a lot of perspective on what I deserve, and how poorly I was treated. The next time I date, I’m going to make sure its someone who isn’t a bag of dicks.”

“Good,” he smiled. “You look happier.”

The pizza was finished quickly. Both of you were pretty hungry, and you were actually surprised you could eat that amount. You both showered and brushed your teeth. You knew you had to get to sleep early. Especially if you were leaving in the morning, and early at that. You and Dean wanted to be at Stanford by tomorrow night, and that meant at least another thirteen hours of driving.

You climbed into bed first, adjusting the covers. Dean was out of the bathroom, wearing a fitted t-shirt and a pair of black boxers. You couldn’t help but stare at him a little longer than usual. You found yourself doing that lately. It wasn’t just when he was in his boxers. It was anytime. When he was helping you make dinner, or when he walked in the room.

He crawled into the small bed, settling next to you. It was just after ten and you knew you had to get to sleep soon or else you’d be grumpy come the morning. Not that you weren’t going to be anyways.

“This bed is super lumpy,” you chuckled.

“Tell me about it. I think my car would have been more comfortable,” he scoffed.

“Your car is more comfortable,” you pointed out. “Let’s just make the best of this. Tomorrow, we can get a nice hotel room with a hot tub and we’ll forget all about this room.”

“Good plan,” he let out a laugh. “G’night sweetheart.”

“Night handsome.”

Your body slowly began to wake. You could feel the light in the room, and you knew then you had to get up within the next couple of minutes. You nuzzled into the pillow a little more, only to find it a little harder than you remembered the night before. Your eyes shot wide open, realizing that you were no longer sleeping on your pillow, but on Dean’s chest. Your arm wrapped around his middle. No wonder you felt well rested. You fell asleep on your best friend.

He slowly began to stir beneath you, and you knew there was no way you were getting away with this one. He was going to find out either way. You may as well take the punishment for what it was. You enjoyed it, hell more than you should. You weren’t going to deny yourself that, not after everything you’ve been through.

“Sweetheart, you awake?” his deep, gruff voice muttered. That’s when you noticed it. His hand on the small of your back. His thumb rubbing circles on your spine. If he was uncomfortable, he certainly didn’t show it.

“Hmm, yeah,” you yawned. “Time to get ready?”

“Yeah. Long day ahead of us,” he reminded you. “Should arrive there tonight.”

“Hot tub,” you chuckled.

“Non lumpy bed. Although you seem to be pretty comfortable,” he teased.

“I didn’t keep you up, did I?”

“Nah,” he let out a little laugh, tightening his grip on you. “Bed was small anyways.”

“Definitely not a queen,” you stated. “We better get out of here. We’ll grab some breakfast on the road.”

“Sounds good.”

You were up and out of the motel room within fifteen minutes. Both of you had a coffee and a breakfast sandwich, ready to take on another long day of driving. Dean decided to take the first driving shift. You searched through his cassette tapes to find something different to listen to, but also something of his standards. You could only play certain things in his car.

Your mind was constantly on the fact that you had somehow fallen asleep cuddling him. He didn’t make a big deal out of it, but to you it was. This was Dean, your best friend Dean. The man you had strong feelings for, Dean. It felt so great to cuddle with him the way you did. It was great to feel safe in his hold, and to just be cuddled. It reminded you a lot of what you didn’t have with Ketch. He hated cuddling, especially at night. He slept as far away from you as possible on the nights you did share a bed. It was probably one of the many reasons why he didn’t want to live together until marriage. Personal issues, as he called it.

“What’s on your mind, pretty girl?” he asked after about an hour on the road. You turned to look at him with a soft smile. His eyes were softer than usual as he looked at you.

“Oh you know, stuff,” you teased, pulling your bottom lip between your teeth.

“Spill it,” he chuckled.

“Last night, I didn’t make you uncomfortable, or cross any lines, did I?” you questioned. Worry was evident in your voice.

“No. You didn’t,” he shook his head with a smirk. “I’m actually surprised it hasn’t happened before.”

“Why do you say that?” you asked curiously.

“Because you’re a really affectionate person, and you crave that very same affection back,” he pointed out. “You like it when I play with your hair, and squeeze you tightly when I hug you. You played with my hair for awhile yesterday. Since the first day I met you, you’ve been touchy and you probably didn’t even realize you were. You helped me get across the road, you hugged me tightly, you rubbed between my shoulders. You’re an affectionate person, and you shouldn’t have to hold back. I don’t mind cuddling, or hugs. Even when you kissed me on the cheek, it wasn’t weird. I accept you for who you are, Y/N.”

“You know you’ve basically just given me permission right?” you giggled. Dean let out a laugh, shaking his head.

“I know. I’m cool with it,” he assured you. “I like cuddling too.”

The day was spent the same as the previous day. One of you napped while the other drove. You stopped for lunch and a few bathroom breaks. You talked about little things that were insignificant to some, but not to you. You learned his favourite kinds of pie, and his favourite colour. You learned that he had his first kiss at sixteen and that he knew how to play the guitar. The little things that were common knowledge. You mostly wanted to know the things that only a best friend would know. He learned the very same about you.

You played a couple of games. One on your phone that was much like twenty questions, but this was a list of about one hundred. Some were completely random, others were strange. Either way, it killed about four hours.

“We’ll be there in fifteen minutes,” you told him. “You ready?”

“Yeah,” he nodded. “Hopefully he’ll want to see me.”

“At the end of the day, you’re his brother. He’d be crazy not to,” you reminded him.

“Where would I be without you?” he chuckled.

“Do you really want me to answer that?” you shook your head with a smirk. “We’re getting chicken for dinner tonight, just so you know.”

“Fine by me,” he smiled. “I could go for some too.”

“And pie,” you added in. “Need pie.”

You pulled into the apartment complex that Dean had pointed to. This was the last known address he had for Sam. If he didn’t live there, then someone had to know where so you could look next. You parked the car, cutting the ignition. You could tell Dean was nervous, but excited at the same time. He didn’t want his brother to turn him away.

His brother's apartment was on the third floor. Room fourteen. Dean glanced up at the building, taking a deep breath. You smiled at him, slipping your hand into his for reassurance. You knew he wasn’t going to move unless you forced him to. You were a little nervous yourself. You were meeting his brother for the first time. It was the only real family he had. Bobby wasn’t his blood, technically. You wondered if Sam looked like his older brother, or if he looked more like one parent and Dean looked like the other. Either way, you were going to find out.

“Here we are,” he breathed out, releasing your hand.

“You’ve got this,” you reassured him. “Time to see your brother.”

Dean raised his hand, knocking three times on the door before taking a step back. You placed your hand between his shoulders, much like you had done before. You could hear a little commotion going on from behind the door, which meant someone was definitely home.

The door unlocked, and opened up just a little. You swallowed hard, suddenly growing a little nervous yourself. You took a step back behind Dean, knowing you’d have him to protect you, in case Sam wasn’t the one living there anymore and it was some big drunk dude.

“Dean?” a voice called out from the doorway. You glanced up to find a taller man with longer brown hair. His brows were furrowed, and he was more surprised than anything. That had to be his brother.

“Hiya Sammy.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Part 9 coming Tuesday!

Did you like it? What was your favourite part? Share your thoughts with me via reblog, reply or send me an ask! Your response is what keeps me sharing stories like this!

654 notes · View notes

everyhowlmarksthedead · 4 years ago

Text

❛ FAMILY ❜

Headcanon.

with Neron ‘Creeper’ Vargas.

Request: Oooh yes yes yeah 😁 I show u take request 🙈 I would read something with Creeper dates a girl who already have 4/5 sons of a precedent relation. Maybe about how he create relationshion with their ? Like one love bike, another by playing football ? An the older is septic but one day he understand have Creeper for stepfather is having all Mayans for family. Sorry if it's sound to specific.

BY ANON

Warnings: none.

Word count: about 1.3k

Aurora says: this writing hasn't been edited, you may find some grammar mistakes, I'm sorry about that!

Gif credits: to the author, I found it on Google.

Masterlist.

Creeper couldn't believe you were alone in charge of three kids, when you moved onto his neighborhood. And he knew you didn't have a husband around because he had never seen him.

The problem was when he realized he was in love with you, with your scent, with the sweet tone of your voice and with that smile which could stop a war.

“Wait, wait! Lemme help you, mama!”

You hear a voice behind you, making you turn around from the trunk of your car full of bags. A man covered with tattoos and a helmet hanging from his forearm, is walking towards you.

“Oh, no, no. Don't worry. It's okay”. You mutter somewhat ashamed with a fleeting smirk on your lips.

“Nah, ain't nothing better to do”. He just shrugs his shoulders, grabbing three bags in every hand and greatly surprising you of his strength.

“Than—Thank you…” You just say, taking the three left, before closing your car.

Walking in silence straight to the porch, you open the door with some difficulties making you both laugh until it finally opens. Following you to the kitchen, he leaves the groceries over the counter, having one quick look but without wanting to look like a creepy stalker.

“I'm (Y/N), by the way”. You say then, raising a hand at him hoping it's enough for a formal greeting.

“Neron”. The man answers, narrowing it softly, a little bewitched by your touch.

“Can I… maybe offer you a coffee or something…?”

Whenever you two were free of responsibilities, you used to sit on your porch to share some drinks and talk about work, or about your lives in general. And only when he knew that it could be something serious, he just talked to you about what he really does, one bit at time.

After some months, more or less, hanging out, you two decided to introduce him to your girls. Two twins of six years old and a pre-teen of fourteen. You were aware that he wouldn't have any problem with Lia and Marta. But Carlota was another history.

Since Creeper has sat at the table, after helping you to settle the table, you can see the younger whispering and chuckling with that kind of gesture that they use when they want to ask something, but they're too ashamed. Narrowing your eyes, as the man does, you look at them.

“C'mon, girls, spit it out”. You say with a funny smile on your lips.

“Can we color your drawings one day?” Marta and Lia ask in unison, pointing at his bare arms.

You can't help but laugh rubbing your faces.

“Sounds like a cool plan”. Creeper nods pretty convinced.

“Fuck this shit”. From her silence, Carlota drags backwards her chair, getting up to step out of the living room.

“Hey, mama”. Neron says grabbing your left wrist, when you're about to follow her. “It's okay. Give her time”.

“I can't let her behave like that”. You grunt sitting down.

“She is fourteen, baby. We both know what her father did. And probably she thinks I want to replace him, but it's not. She will see it, okay?”

The months kept passing by, taking the next step when you decided to live together. At this point he has already introduced you to his brothers, being more kindly than you thought. At least, they didn't thought that Neron was fucking out of his mind, for getting related with a woman with three kids.

Lia and Marta were delighted having him at home, playing with them whenever he had five minutes, or cooking pancakes on Sundays. And of course, letting your girls color all his tattoos.

Carlota, by the other hand, started to be hard-nose. Always locking herself in her dorm when she was at home. And it was breaking your heart, trying to talk with her about what was bothering her, even if you already knew. But the worst part was when the principal of his highschool called you to tell you about a fight that involucred your daughter with another three girls.

“Hey, mama, I got this, okay?”

What you didn't know is that Neron was already conscious about what was happening. So he was to take care of that business.

Your daughter was sitting on a bench in the peak time of finishing classes, crying unconsolable with her hands covering her burning face. She wasn't expecting the loud buzz coming closer, raising her blurry gaze to the road. Nine motorbikes made their appearance, getting parked backwards next to the sidewalks. The whole student body with their parents and some teachers turned at them, mostly whispering about how good those nine men looked. Taking off their helmets, Neron's brothers waited for him, having some cigs, while he started to walk towards your surprised daughter.

As soon as he was able to kneel close to her, he knew by just one look who were the other girls. He didn't say anything, standing up to lead his steps to the three families with their eyes fixed on the man.

“I know that your daughters are teasing my kid about me, about my club and about what we do. So, lemme tell you something, as parents you are, the only thing you want is the happiness of them. Keep it in mind. Because next time my kid comes back home crying, I will not be this… polite”.

The girls were trembling, hiding behind their parents who were terrified too because of his words. Showing them a fake smile, Neron turned around to your daughter to make her a sign.

“I want you to say ‘sorry’ to her, and promise that you will never gonna fuck her up again”.

“Sir, yo—”.

“Shut the fuck up, man. I'm talking to your ill-bred kids”.

“We… We're so—sorry, Carlota”.

Your daughter looked at him, clinging to his arm, pouting a little and pulling him back.

“Good. Never forget to be kind”.

That night, Carlota didn't stop talking about how scared everyone was because of Creeper, totally freaking out too about when he appeared with his brothers in such cool motorbikes.

It was almost two am when your boyfriend came from the clubhouse, a little tired and needed for a cold beer. Taking off his boots at the entrance, to not be noisy, he walks straight to the kitchen to grab one from the fridge. Opening it with not much difficulty, he has a sip turning to the island in the middle of the kitchen.

“Jesus fucking christ, Carlota…” He whispers with his heart racing. “What you doin'ere?”

“I couldn't sleep”. She just says, having another spoon of ice cream.

“At least, turn on the lights… You're gonna gimme a heart attack, kid”.

She laughs low, shaking her head, before getting up from the stool. Walking towards him without saying a single word, your daughter hugs Creeper wrapping his waist with both arms.

“Thank you for today”. She mutters resting her cheek on his chest.

Your boyfriend doubts for a second, not knowing if it's real or an illusion, but it feels so good that he could help her somehow. Hugging her back, the man kisses her head, smiling like a fool. Being happy to see that she's finally accepting him in her family.

“Listen, Carlota…” He says then, pulling himself away to leave the beer over the counter. “I don't wanna replace anyone, okay? We don't have to play this dad and daughter game. I wanna be your friend, I want you to trust me and talk to me about your problems, if you have some, okay?”

“Okay”. She just says. “I'm sorry if I hurt you ever”.

“Nah, it's okay, kid. I just want you to be happy”.

“I am, Creep'”.

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lemystical-puffle · 4 years ago

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My A3 Sexuality Headcanons that no one asked for!

[These won’t include Gender, only sexual orientation or lack thereof(is that a phrase?)]

Color coordination

Gay

Pan

Aro

Hetero

Sakuya Sakuma: Pansexual! He doesn’t have any preferences, honestly after his childhood he just wants someone who will love and accept him!

Masumi: Bisexual. I feel like he would love the director whether they be boy, girl, other, all, he just wants someone to give him attention, and that person just happened to be out beloved Izumi Tachibana.

Tsuzuru: okay this ones me projecting but whatever Aro/Ace Tsuzuru. He doesn’t feel romantic attraction, and instead just feels a family-brotherly kind of love towards his friends and fellow actors. He doesn’t really want to romantically be with someone, and yet instead just wants to be there for them when they need it and love them the same way he loves his family at home

Citron: Also pan!! But Pan-Romantic specifically. Citron literally just wants to love everyone ever because he’s just awesome like that, but won’t go pass kissing someone. It just makes him uncomfortable which is perfectly fine because he is Citron Lastname! But yeah, also no gender prefermance

Itaru: Bi with a male preference. I can’t really explain why I think this, I just do. Maybe because most of the woman he has ever shown interest in are his 2D anime waifus. Also I mean come on he totally had a whole thing for Lancelot he thinks knights are hot and that is so valid.

Chikage: he is a gay cabbage. Listen the only time he has said he liked a woman it was because he said they weren’t like his mom and I am just- I’m sorry I don’t trust that. This man is a gay, he is never had a boyfriend but he has definitely thought of hooking up with his boss for a raise, thanks for coming to my Ted talk.

Tenma: Also bi! Bi-Ace specifically. I wasn’t really sure where to put him because on one hand I feel like he has a lot of MLM energy but on the other hand his solo song so I just, bi. I feel like his gay awakening came when he played the token gay best friend in a romcom because gay actor erasure but Tenma didn’t really understand, but later he was in a scene where he was with his boyfriend who shows up for one second to remind the audience he’s a homosexual and Tenma was just: crap he’s not

Yuki: okay at first I didn’t know what to put for Yuki cause on one hand sexuality erasure Yuki has specifically said he likes girl and he defies stereotypes and stuff but on the other hand he never said he didn’t like boys so he’s bi with a female preference. I feel like Yuki is the kind of guy to just happen to fall in love with whoever and just go “oh crap did I just fall in love?” And while he likes girls more sometimes it just. Happens.

Muku: Surprise surprise he’s Pan! Muku totally reads shoujo manga with all sexualities and is very livid about good representation, will write a “negative review” (and in Muku terms that’s him being very polite, 4.5/5 stars and linking research resources) about how inaccurate a sexuality was portrayed. I feel like at first he just thought he was a very active ally and now he is just: “oh crap boys. And girls. And enbys. And genderfluids. And everyone.”

Misumi: Misumi is very homosexual, which at first he was sad about because homosexual has 2 o’s which are circles but then he realized he can just say gay but spell it like: G🔺Y so he got happy again. I feel like it was one of the reasons he was kicked out of his home, he just likes boys Jeez Ikaruga parents no rights. (I also Headcanon him as autistic but that’s not what this post is about).

Kazunari: In Kazunari Miyoshi’s world he never has to make a decision in his life and that includes sexuality. Show him a guy and a girl and tell him to pick one and he will simply overload until he picks the person who knows the most trivia on classical art or smthing. Kazunari just: adores everyone ever, and that’s okay! After a lot of internalized homophobia and fear, he was able to come out to first a small group of college friends and eventually felt comfortable with the label and was able to express it openly, now he wears it with pride!

Kumon: I really don’t have any explaining to go here, Kumon just feels gay to me. My head can’t wrap around him wanting to be intimate with a girl. I do think there was this big moment of him coming out to Juza and Juza just going “s’okay.” Then they hug and get ice cream

Banri: Banri is bisexual with a straight pride flag and a Juza Preference. Catch him at the straight pride parade telling “those Homo’s that they’re going to burn.” While making out with Juza against a wall. That’s canon I don’t take criticism

Juza: Also Gay, I feel like Kumon came out first and Juza did research and was like “oh me too.” And just thought about how he’s never actually liked a girl and thought boys were kinda pretty and oh crap Settsu slicked his hair back oh crap oh crap pretty men.

Taichi: Taichi is bisexual, with his preferences being as random as his hair. Except no weird 1/4 quarters going on. Idk where I was going with that analogy I’m sorry. Taichi just likes the humans and wants to go kiss kiss with them all, and then bring them along on his journey for fame and popularity!

Omi: Listen, Omi is the mother of Mankai, and as the mother he loves everyone unconditionally. He also totally wanted to kiss Nachi I’m sorry. I feel like Omi has a male preference, but only by a bit as he loves everyone! He is a good boy and brings all the snacks and water to the pride parades so his friends stay healthy :)

Sakyo: Sakyo is the straight~ supportive dad who doesn’t care if you’re gay straight bi pan anything as long as you pay your taxes. Was probably a little confused at first just because. Probably said “LGBT? Isn’t that a sandwich.” But he got informed did research and is now a huge ally! After more research he identifies specifically as graysexual/romantic as he feels rarely any romantic attraction at all unless under certain circumstances aka Izumi Tachibana. I akso think he suspected that Azami was LGBT for a bit before he came out so he wanted to do research so that Azami would feel comfortable coming out when he was ready. Also he can’t like, not support Sakoda (who I Headcanon as gay :) )

Azami: Azami is bi-aro. Sex? Nah he won’t even hold your hand before marriage, however he will love you no matter your gender. I also see him with a female preference just from his straight upbringing and it’s the title he feels most comfortable with after some internalized homophobia, especially with how his dad shamed him for liking makeup. He is still getting used to the LGBT community and I feel like he is still taking baby steps, learning about different identities and wanting to do all he can to support both himself and his fellow actors due to simply not knowing where to start. Don’t worry Azami take you’re time! There is no rush, you are trying to figure yourself out and we all love you so much for it, there is no shame in changing your mind later. We adore you all the same. (If you couldn’t tell, I wasn’t only talking to Azami. If you are still questioning yourself it is 100% okay, because honestly I am too. There is no rush to figure yourself out, and I hope you know that we are all here for you!)

Tsumugi: Tsumugi is gay, but I feel like he also had a lot of internalized homophobia. I feel like when he was younger he really liked Tasuku but didn’t really understand the difference between platonic and romantic, and it took some time before he was able to really discover himself and come to the identity he has currently.

Tasuku: Tasuku is gay and homophobic.

Hisoka: Hisoka is homo-demi-romantic asexual. I feel like it won’t want to date anyone without really earning their trust and feeling safe around them, and after that point he still will be pretty shy romantically, but it is very much understandable and we all still love Hisoka

Homare: Homare is pan. He doesn’t really care about gender, he just wants someone who will love him and his poetry without seeing him as broken. I feel like after his last relationship he was hesitant to date again, but after some time and help from the rest of winter troupe he was able to rediscover himself. (Also autistic Homare go brrrr)

Azuma: Azuma is an old gay man who just thinks boobs are neat. That’s it that’s the post sent tweet turn off replies.

Guy: New color who this? This is because I didn’t know what to put for Guy, so he simply doesn’t identify as anything. I don’t know a lot about Guy but I know enough to feel like relationships would be very awkward and touchy for him due to his problems with emotions and expression. He isn’t straight, but he doesn’t really identify as anything either. He’s just: Guy. Which is more than valid

[oh also all of winter is Poly and they’re boyfriends thanks for coming to my Ted talk]

Hope you all liked these! Of course they are all my own opinion and you don’t have to agree with all, they’re just how I feel!! Feel free to reply or reblog with your own opinions or Headcanons!!

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arigatouiris · 5 years ago

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was it a coincidence? // shinazugawa sanemi

Author’s Note: Soft Sanemi anyone? I enjoy writing soft sides of baddies because that’s how they areeeee. Anyway, ever since I got to know Sanemi in Kimetsu Academy is a math professor, I knew this was coming. So here it is! Tell me what ya’ll think!

Word count: 4412

Pairing: Modern! Sanemi Shinazugawa x Reader

Warnings: fluff, mutual pining, soft nemi

❝

For as long as you can remember, your interactions with Shinazugawa Sanemi have been strange. You weren’t one to abruptly jump and exclaim that it’s meant to be or the mere cinematic aspect of him popping up everywhere would actually amount to something. Nah, Sanemi as a person gave you very little to fantasize about. But, it was true and some close to you were noticing it after years.

Sanemi and you shared a fateful relationship that forced you to enter each other’s lives unexpectedly.

It began with middle school. You never knew Sanemi before middle school, but it was when you joined did you understand that your senpai was someone no one could mess with. He was apparently very kind before—but something had happened that changed him.

You were in your first year of middle school when Sanemi was in his last, and despite not interacting with him at that time, you knew of him. He was brash, would amount to teasing every single person he came in contact with and would pull pranks on other students. Sanemi was a force as a child, and you started to believe that it would never change.

It didn’t.

Strangely, you joined your first choice of high school—again, where Sanemi was your senpai. This time, as luck would have it, he noticed you. He gave you a mean glare—the meaning of which you had no idea about—that caused you to whimper and look away, not wanting to run into him. You didn’t know Sanemi was part of the high school you chose, which had a fairly decent reputation. Considering his brash self, you never pegged him for a well-achieving student.

Your interactions were scarce—your ‘senpai, I’m sorry’ whenever you bumped into him (you were part of the newspaper club, you really loved writing and editing, some teased that you’d become the English teacher someday). Sanemi wouldn’t even utter your name, you didn’t even know if he knew your name to begin with, but would click his tongue and ignore you. You took that as a good sign because he normally yells at people who bump into him.

What caused your fascination with Sanemi-senpai was a small yet brief incident during the school festival. His face, at the time, was scarless, so there was a line of girls who wanted a piece of Shinazugawa meat, not considering the fact that he wasn’t interested. Which was weird, you thought, because he could have any man or woman he so desired. But, that was the thing—he didn’t desire.

Sanemi was criticized during the festival by a faculty member that he wasn’t taking part in the events his classmates were working so hard for. Begrudgingly, he decided to be the cashier for an event—a cat cafe event—and since Sanemi was good at math, he was asked to count and collect the revenue that came in. You and your good friend decided to pop into the cafe just to see what your attractive senpai was doing. You wondered if you were the only one who found him intimidating, whereas the whole population of girls believed his bad attitude was attractive. You wondered if they found him attractive for the wrong reasons.

“Look at him!” Your friend cooed, and you did look at him, only to spot him doing absolutely nothing and staring blankly ahead of him with no emotion.

Clearly, he was bored and didn’t want to be there. You turned to your friend and felt several sweat drops on your forehead at her wasteful enthusiasm. You didn’t understand what she was trying to do, was she trying to impress him?

“I’m going to ask him if he wants to join us for a cup of coffee.”

Your eyes widened. You put your hands forward and shook your head.

“I really don’t think that’s a good idea—”

“Why not? You have your eye on him or something?”

You blushed at the accusation, only wishing for your friend to know that Sanemi isn’t someone who can be impressed so easily. You always believed he’d want something else, a wistful type of want where you desire after something you can’t have—Sanemi had a deep aura embedded underneath all that menacing outwardly appearance, which was clearly not who he was. And here was a girl, your friend, who was completely infatuated with his demeanor.

“N-No, I don’t think he can stop or pause midway—”

“No harm in asking!”

Sometimes, you wished you were as upfront as your friend was. You let out a squeak before praying for your friend. Sanemi would yell at her and it would break her heart and you’d have to do all you could to console her and tell her that it wasn’t her but him. However,

“Would you like to join us for coffee?” Your friend asked with a smile.

Sanemi looked at her with a blank expression, “No,”

He turned and looked at your bewildered expression and for some reason, you felt so sad. There was nothing menacing about him right then, there was absolutely nothing scary. In one moment, all your apprehensions about Sanemi flew away, and there was no way you were ever going to be intimidated by this guy again.

He looked down at the counter and muttered, “If you’ve got nothing to buy, leave.”

Your friend giggled and came back to you, but you stood up this time and approached your senpai. Sanemi grumbled before noticing it was you. You, whose face he remembered since middle school, whose name he kept forgetting, whose only reactions were once whimpers when you saw him, which had gradually changed to softer and hesitant greetings to now this,

“I’m sorry if she was too forward, senpai.”

Sanemi merely looked at you, reactionless.

“It’s fine.”

And that was that. You were impressed, and the blooming of a crush was formed. The more you thought of it, the more it didn’t make sense, and the more it didn’t make sense, the more you liked it.

You’d smile at Sanemi whenever you saw him now, a soft smile reserved just for him, which he’d ignore obviously. You’d often bump into him on the terrace, completing his homework on his own. Your heart went out to him, you knew of his large family and how his father walked away and how he managed two more jobs alongside school to take care of his family.

You wouldn’t say anything, because that would make you friends. Whatever it was that you shared, you enjoyed it.

Wordless, silent, and comfortable.

You felt your heart shatter at the mere thought of him graduating, but you knew he had to go. He was selected in a college in Tokyo, for mathematics, and you knew he was going to excel in it. You wanted to give him something, you wanted to take something from him before he left, but it was strange—you knew there was no possible way you could feel something so strongly for him considering you were a mere 15-year old and he was close to being 18.

But, here you were, tearing up on his graduation day, trying hard not to show how much you grew to like the person he was hiding behind the aggressiveness he normally displayed.

On his graduation day, you rushed over to him—he was again, avoiding people while being on the terrace.

“Shinazugawa-senpai!” Sanemi turned to you with a scowl, which you’d like to believe reduced in intensity upon the mere sight of you, “I... I want to give you something!”

He’d thrown out an entire box of buttons the day before and if you were also giving him a button, he knew he’d lose it. There was no way he was going to—

His eyes widened. You were giving him a pen?

“I know you like pens. I always find that you have a new one every month... Whenever you complete homework. I just... I want you to have it for college—”

“Ridiculous.”

You knew he didn’t mean it and giggled at his expression. He took the pen from you and shoved it in his pockets. You knew he’d give it a good long look when you weren’t there. He was looking at you now, his intense glare directing at you, wordlessly.

“Aren’t you scared of me?”

You shook your head as if you were expecting this question.

“Why? I haven’t been nice to you in my life.”

He was right. He was rude, brash and arrogant. He hadn’t been nice to you.

“But, you haven’t been mean either.” You said, smiling widely.

You heard him scoff before coming forward and ruffling your hair. You felt your stomach flip at the contact, but that was all you could expect now anyway. A second later, you felt him hold your hand, your eyes widening at his action—a gasp exiting your mouth as you felt something cold being placed there.

“It’s a button...” Sanemi was struggling with this, “From my shirt... The second button.”

It was a gold button—big enough as a small pendant for a chain. You already knew what you were going to do with it. You smiled before accepting it, bowing down and wishing him good luck, saying goodbye hurt but this was nice—you were acknowledged, and so were your feelings. Sanemi Shinazugawa was your first love, and that was that.

When Sanemi looked at you for the first time, he thought you were an idiot.

It was a fleeting gaze, you see a person as you pass the corridors, never to spot them again or remember their face. Some faces you remember because they were prettier than the rest or uglier than the rest. Some you remember because they had a weird hair color or a big nose. Sanemi remembered your face because it looked like an idiot.

Who smiles like that anyway? Like a dumbass with no care in the world? Oh, so birds like you? How childish. He couldn’t waste his time looking at someone like you. You were three years younger than him, you were practically no one.

When Sanemi looked at you properly for the second time, he was confused. You were once again his junior in high school. It confused him, how you—of all people—you had turned up as his junior in this school. It made no sense. Funnily enough, he didn’t think you were an idiot this time. You were kind of cute but were shyer than before.

You would whimper whenever he scowled at you, which again, he found a tad bit cute but also insulting. He wasn’t a ghoul for you to look so afraid of him. But, something had changed—he couldn’t quite put his finger on it, but things had changed after the school festival.

You voluntarily walked over and spoke to him about your dumbass of a friend hitting on him. He realized that there was no use yelling at girls who found him attractive, because 1) he knew he was attractive, and 2) he really wasn’t interested in them and 3) they approached him more when he yelled at them, and this last point made no sense to him whatsoever.

But, you approaching him made no sense either. In fact, it confused him more. You would greet him whenever you saw him, sending him a soft smile or a wave, whatever was appropriate at the time.

Around this time, when Sanemi looked at you, he thought you could be someone he could talk to. You could sit in silence for hours and he wouldn’t feel uncomfortable. You wouldn’t try to fill the space with awkward conversation or small talk—two things Sanemi hated the most. You were just comfortable with him when he completed homework, and you read a book or did something else he didn’t quite pay attention to.

He paid attention to the fact that he didn’t pay attention to you, which meant he was paying attention to you. When Sanemi understood this, he wanted to be around you more but his graduation was approaching and it was as if reality was letting him know that it was either too late or never going to happen.

However, he had always been a weird sort of fighter. When Sanemi gave you the second button on his shirt, he took a good long look at you. It was the third time he had allowed himself to give you a long, customary Sanemi-look, which took a mental picture of you for him to remember when you were not around.

When Sanemi looked at you, that third time, he knew for a fact that you would one day become his wife.

There’s no way... You were bewildered, and it was as if fate wanted you to fail in the subject you hated the most. You were excelling in English and that was what you wanted to study. You didn’t want to study anything else, you were, in fact, very happy that you had your entire life sorted out at the young age of 18. You were going to attend college and get an English degree and you were going to teach.

How good is math in your life? Not very.

How good is math in your life if your first love, senpai from the past, senpai from middle school, was the one teaching you?

You were definitely going to fail.

The aura he brought into class as he was introduced as your new class’s assistant faculty was menacing. You had actually almost forgotten what this feeling was—but as soon as he stepped inside, you were reminded of it brutally, as if the aura had never walked out on you at all. He had scars on his face now, a story you knew you’d probably never know. Sanemi didn’t even look at you, you believed he forgot about you; but you stupidly still wore his button around your neck—people often teasing you about a long lost senpai you were crushing on from the past.

Everyone remembered Sanemi, everyone was scared and no one knew that the button belonged to him. It was a secret you were sure were to take to the grave, but now the chances of that were slim.

“This is why I think fate is modulating your interactions with Shinazugawa-sensei!” Your friend exclaimed.

“It’s nothing like that... I think he just got a job here and it’s paying well—”

“What if he came back for you?”

You rolled your eyes. There was no way he’d have come back for me, you thought, your heart flipping at the mere thought. You watched as Sanemi walked into another classroom, hearing rumors about how he was incredibly strict with his students. That didn’t surprise you at all, and in fact, you liked how serious he was about the subject he liked. A soft smile sat on your lips and you were lost in thought until—

“Thinking about Shinazugawa-sensei?” Your friend teased you before you growled and pushed her away playfully.

Once you were alone, your fingers traced the texture of the button he gave you, which was still around your neck like a small charm. You’ve worn it for two years now—the two years he wasn’t there. It wasn’t as if you never had crushes after that, you did. You even had a relationship in school, the cute and fleeting glances, hand-holding and the first kiss. You had your first heartbreak as well when you caught your then-boyfriend sticking his tongue down your junior’s throat.

In two years, you believed you had moved on from Shinazugawa-senpai, no, -sensei, but turns out, your feelings returned tenfold with him just walking into your class.

“Is there a problem?” Sanemi growled at one of your classmates, who was asked to solve a question on the board.

You gulped and thanked the heavens it wasn’t you. You definitely didn’t know how to solve the question, and you didn’t want his wrath falling down on you. However, you knew of him and you knew him. You knew he just wanted his students to learn. You watched as he loudly explained how to solve the question, and you unconsciously took down notes, actually paying attention.

“Any questions?” He snapped at the class, which was dead quiet.

Your hand went up in the air, bringing down a deathly aura around you. You looked so intrigued, your eyes closed and your hand in the air steady, your lips curved into a soft smile.

“I have a question.”

You were sure your classmates were fully intent on killing you and hiding your body, but since the class time was up, no one had the obligation to wait.

“Get out.” Sanemi told the rest of the class, and you assumed was the rest of the class because you didn’t budge, as the class exited the room, relieved.

“Sensei, my question—”

“What is it?”

You stood up and brought your book over, asking him the question. Calculus was very hard, and you weren’t very good at it. Sanemi took one look at your notes and knew you were struggling, but you were trying. He normally hated it when his students were bad at his subject, but then there was you—you, who were really, really bad, but was also trying very hard.

He explained calmly and you kept asking him to repeat—annoying him, making him yell at you, but you patiently listened, looking bashful. When you finally understood, you thanked him, and bowed, causing the button pendant to slip out from inside your collar and dangle. You hadn’t noticed it was showing, but Sanemi had. His eyes widened just a bit before noticing you walk away, causing him to stare at the pen he was using to explain a math problem to you.

The pen you had given him.

He knew of his shortcomings, but it was rare to find a person who wasn’t appalled with his attitude. He was sure of it, though. He’d looked at you properly for the fourth time and thought the same thing he thought when he looked at you properly for the third time.

During your graduation, you missed meeting Shinazugawa-sensei, but luckily for you, he gave you a smirk when the assembly was about to begin. You didn’t know what the smirk meant, but on the rare times you had seen it and your heart flipped, this had managed to do the same once more. You unconsciously touched the button necklace, something Sanemi noticed you do (and he knew what you were doing because he had given you the damn button).

You attended Tokyo University, Sanemi’s alma mater, for English. It was only for a year, luckily for you, and you knew you were going to have to come back home for your family. You’d look for a job there, but what you didn’t know was one of your old faculty members was teaching in Tokyo.

“You should join Kimetsu Academy!” He said, patting your back.

Your heart flipped at the thought of your old school, the school where Sanemi teaches still. He had been your senpai, your sensei, and if you were to join Kimetsu Academy as a TA, he’d be sensei again, but so would you.

Although part of your motivation in joining Kimetsu Academy was teaching in your old school, you couldn’t deny joining Kimetsu for Sanemi. You weren’t sure if he was married now—you were 22 years old, which meant he was 25. You were hyperaware of him and what he was doing and you knew he would be surprised with this move.

On your first day, you took your time walking through empty corridors. You remembered the locker you used back in school, where you’d place your outdoor shoes and your indoor shoes. You let out a sigh as you walked past your old classrooms, feeling warm on the inside.

“How long do you plan on wasting time?”

You jumped and turned around to spot Sanemi, leaning against the opposite wall, looking at you as if you were crazy. Your eyes were wide and you felt like you were going to have a panic attack. Your heart was beating erratically, and your mind was blank. You were not ready to see him yet, you wanted to see him surprised and yet, here he was, surprising you!

“Shinazugawa-senpai...” You voiced, placing a shaky hand against your heart. “You... You scared me—”

“You still wear it?”

You blinked, “Eh?”

Sanemi pointed to his own neck and your eyes widened. Your face reddened and you let out a soft squeak before earning a throaty chuckle from him.

“H-How did you... I mean—I... It symbolizes the essence of my childhood, it’s... it’s not what you—”

“Shut up,” Sanemi said, sighing. “Didn’t really think it’d be goodbye for real, did you?”

You blinked, confused.

“What do you mean?”

He took one good look at you. The fifth time. And when Sanemi smiled at you, you thought you’d actually die.

“Life keeps throwing you back to me. Didn’t think it’d be a fucking coincidence, did you?”

“What did you think it was?”

You weren’t sure why you were so nervous. You weren’t sure why this felt like he was confessing to you. He merely shrugged and walked away, leaving you there with more questions than answers.

A month passed, with bare minimum interactions. You had made new friends, and you were getting better at teaching and handling a noisy classroom. You wore your button necklace with pride, flaunting it almost, sending secret smiles to Sanemi who sent you secret glances in return. Soon, the secret glances were late-evening interactions, when the two of you would stay back to correct answer papers.

It was one particularly long night when you realized you were utterly and irrevocably in love with Shinazugawa Sanemi. You still had four more sheets to go, and the time was over 8 p.m., in the night. Sanemi was still in the staff room as well, correcting his own bunch of papers—cursing here and there about how terrible kids were at math. You’d generally interrupt with a mild conversation, but Sanemi noticed how you hadn’t uttered a word in over an hour. He paused, noticing how he had one more paper to go, and turned and looked at you.

You were engrossed in reading the students’ papers. You had a stern look on your face, the sternest you could conjure, and you were chewing on the back of your pen—a habit Sanemi hated, but found adorable when you did it. He took a good long sixth look at you right then, your hair messy, your eyes having heavy bags underneath them, your fidgety fingers, and he thought the same thing he thought when he saw you for the fourth time and the fifth time.

He was so sure you would become his wife. He was so sure.

But perhaps, the sixth time he looked at you was a bit different. Sanemi felt a strange nostalgia upon seeing you, wearing his button around your neck with pride, remembering how the first time he saw you he thought you looked idiotic even. He hadn’t realized he was watching you for a couple of minutes now, in utter silence, and enjoyed the whole while.

Oh shit, Sanemi’s eyes widened. Oh, fuck.

His mother had warned him about how Shinazugawa men fall in love. They fall rock hard and it would most often kill them. The realization hits them at a young age, they were sure of what they wanted and Sanemi was sure as well.

But for the first time in his life, he was floored.

“Oi,” He let out, a serious expression sitting on his face. “(y/n).”

He had resorted to calling you by your first name, not that you complained.

“Hm?”

You were paying the papers more attention than him. You really were a good teacher.

Sanemi stood up and walked over you, you weren’t even aware that he was approaching you, and stood by your side. He looked at the papers, the long answers and the amount of red pouring into them. He looked at your head and leaned down, his mouth right next to your right ear. You shuddered when you felt a breath on your ear, but you didn’t move.

Slowly, Sanemi pressed his lips to your cheek and stood there, waiting for a response. He didn’t want to scare you—he hated scaring you, but he did enjoy flustering you.

You were frozen like a rock when he pulled away. Sanemi wasn’t one to casually give off affection like that, but there were times you knew he could be gentle. You turned slowly, to meet his gaze, his hand supporting him as he bent down to your level. Your face was bright red, but your eyes were intense.

“Shina—”

“No.”

You gulped. You understood him too well to know what he meant.

“Sanemi-san.”

He grinned before looking at your lips once, twice and then into your eyes before noticing your hands reach up to his cheeks. The sexual tension was palpable in the air, and just as soon as your hands touched his cheeks—he took the plunge. He kissed you, like Sanemi would, rough and passionate—his hands buried themselves into your already messy hair and he kissed you some more. He captured your lips into his own, before pulling out and kissing your jaw, your neck, and your eyes, before plunging and kissing you again.

You gasped when he brought you to a standing position, pulling you closer to him and kissing you harder, but also softer—a compassionate side of Sanemi’s most people were not allowed to see.

When he pulled away, it was as if you would die if you didn’t tell him.

“Sanemi-san, I... I love you.”

He knew. He knew it from the third time he had seen you. He grinned before laughing, confusing you, offending you—but you had seen it.

Your eyes widened a tad bit when you saw the adoration he had in his eyes as he looked at you.

The seventh time Sanemi Shinazugawa saw you, he was floored; he was deeply, and devastatingly in love with you.

And while people relied on words to express their feelings, there you were. You were fluent in Sanemi’s own internal language. You had always been. And it had always, always been you.

“For... For how long have you—”

The question was left hanging in the air for a bit before Sanemi answered how Sanemi would.

“Shut up.”

❞

#sanemi #sanemi x reader #shinazugawa sanemi #shinaguzawa sanemi #shinazugawa #sanemi shinazugawa #shinazugawa sanemi x reader #sanemi shinazugawa x reader #wind hashira #Kimetsu no Yaiba #kimetsu no yaiba spoilers #kimetsu no yaiba manga #kimetsu no yaiba x reader #kimetsu no yaiba sanemi

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cloveroctobers · 4 years ago

Text

• TALIA NASCIMENTO•

IG info/bio: @/callmetalia333 | 524k followers | Journalist | TALIA. but u may have formerly known me as user: brdf0rdsvasquiff—rip!!!1! so don’t even think about it 😌

(23) 25 going on (26) years of age

I’ve read a canon that her name is just Talia and not short for anything & I agree with that + she’s always quick to correct someone if they get it wrong too

Her hometown is Watford, England

but she was originally born in Maidenhead in the backseat of a car during a severe rainstorm

Nonetheless watford taught her all she needed to know when it came to music

She found her first love when she heard the sound of music soundtrack for the v first time as a young girl but is often nervous to admit that?

her father is Brazilian and is a firefighter

her mother is Bulgarian and works as a secretary in a elementary school

her mother is more traditional than her father when it comes to their cultures

I originally felt like she gave only child vibes but I can deff see her giving off big sis energy since she did mention she has a younger brother

V protective over her little brother

there’s a three year age difference

her parents have separated multiple times before which caused a riff in the family dynamic

The constant coming and going from her dad became quite irritating

And Talia was the most vocal by wanting them to figure it out and NOT get a divorce

Which led to talia’s commitment issues when it came to relationships herself

was born with blue eyes yet they shifted to brown once she grew

“Tom-boy” growing up & still is

netball was her sport and man was it something to see her play?! She was quick on her feet and can definitely shoot far-range with ease

Always down for contact sports too

She lost count how many bruises and scrapes she would come home with much to her mother’s horror but she would always brush it off—it was never that big of a deal to her

yet she takes time in healing her scars with homemade treatments or purchases from beauty stores when she wants to show her legs off

she didn’t get into “girly” wear until recently, she never thought too much of her body or when she started to get curves...she always hid that behind big tee’s, fitted jeans, and kicks—that’s what she was used to

she’s got broad shoulders and toned arms

had thick bushy brows that almost formed a uni brow growing up

her mother used to have her hair always plaited since she is very superstitious, believing that “the devil lives in the woman’s hair”

yet talia’s hair texture was much different than her mother’s, maybe due to the fact that her mother always had her hair up and out of the way? Talia’s hair is much bigger, heavier, and naturally curly

+ her mother used to say some harsh things in Bulgarian about her hair — that says a lot when you’re taught to hate your hair trust!!!

when she got a little older and able to manage her own hair + afford it, She learned how to love it herself and that’s all that mattered. Her hair became v important to her, it was her source of comfort

that’s the only thing she’s high maintenance about tbh

she spends a lot of money on her hair but devacurl can still piss off

diffusing is one of her fav things to do to her hair—besides washing it, and deep conditioning, after a night of letting her hair air-dry

loves rose jam

has a embroidery machine, along with a collection of her work but only one piece is showcased in her flat. She didn’t want her place to look completely like her bába’s (Bulgarian: grandmother)

her closet is filled with many Havaianas, they’re all piled up in a wicker basket and ready to tumble over on her top shelf... if she moves one of the ceramic pots her mother left in her flat for luck, that whole shelf might come crashing down

Swears drinking guaraná the next morning cures any hangover you may have

commonly sleeps in big t-shirts and panties or not or booty shorts depending on her time of the month—it’s freeing to her

Has torn her achilles due to whatever contact sport she decided to join in on during a beach vacation with her mates

has a touch of arthritis in her shoulder

this is where her love for massages came from due to injuries she’s faced

+ It’s always a good sign when you can make someone else feel better ya know?

She’s been told she’s great with her hands ;) it all takes practice

bi mami *cringe* but she likes what she likes, and feels what she feels

she kinda has a type but doesn’t want to admit that

her mother doesn’t understand this but her father easily accepted her preference/orientation

her little brother was the first she came out to, “alright!...you still suck”

always wants to fix situations WHEN it comes to HER friends but is oblivious when it’s come to her own issues whether its in relationships/friendships +

was called out by one of her friends who she often argues/butts heads with from time to time “you’re always sticking your nose in people’s business but can’t solve your own shit!”

maybe it’s the journalist in her? she’s not afraid to ask questions or look at things from a outside perspective

her group of friends are all from different ethnic backgrounds to Indian to Ethiopian

has been in and out of relationships...maybe had one stable relationship? Outside of mc but that relationship failed after a year and she feels it has something to do with her parents and how she watched their relationship unfold but won’t openly admit that

Doesn’t like to argue in relationships and often is a little undermining with how she responses to her partner’s feelings...she’s trying to be better at being understanding and listening, her mother is like this with her father

Aquarius girl + Scorpio moon + Taurus rising

loves the water + watching water sports rather than playing them since she almost drowned once by letting her confidence get the best of her

used to be a directioner and isn’t ashamed to admit that!

take me home album stan 100% bitch there’s no point in arguing!!! Buh bye!!!

She is ashamed however to admit that she used to write for them, mostly ziam fics with a touch of Harry thrown in the mix as well...take that how u will

has a few merch pieces as well, they’re mostly loungewear + that powdery perfume they dropped. YES she still has it, no she won’t sell it to u

still supports them on the low since you know, she’s a music journalist and reviewing songs is what she makes a living for so why the hell not? They will always hold a special place in her heart. She grew with those boys

she’s not in denial like Hannah that they’re get back together

If someone wants her to film a reaction vid to zayn’s new album or release a written review? She WILL. Her top 3? 1. When loves around ft Syd 2. Outside 3. Unfuckwitable

If someone wants to hear her thoughts on Harry’s mv’s + breaking down his lyrics, she’ll tell you what you NEED to know whether U agree or not she don’t give a damn lol

Can throw hands and stomp a bitch out if she needs too. Has gotten kicked out of clubs/bars for defending her friends mainly not because someone chatted shit to her, that’s whatever but once you cross her friends? It’s on

Allegra got lucky 🦶🏼☕️ and Lucy

remained super close with jake and tim as expected...Rohan’s cool too ofc! but she’s not here for their rapping shit sorry. She’ll hit them both with a quick side eye and snarl if they start or if jake wants to recite some poetry. She’s outta here

Talia hardly had issues making friends easily with the boys it was always harder with the girls :/

they hang out all the time!

she actually became close with sammi as well, which was nice to have another girl friend around even tho they weren’t together in the house long like the others. She’s spontaneous, cute, resourceful, and kind so talia had no issue reaching out to her first to see what she was about outside of the show

don’t even ask her about what she thinks of the new seasons, she’s not here to chat shit and have her words twisted like she’s watched many of the cast deal with. If you want to talk about the over kill use of pop as the soundtrack for each season, then yeah she’ll talk to you about that

doesn’t use social media much, she finds it funny how whenever she does pop back in people are begging her to post SOMETHING so that they know that she’s alive

Pretty private

she also can’t grasp why they want her to do the bussit challenge? Lmao like hey don’t get her wrong, some of them were pretty great but she’s barely got a bum to bounce and little booties matter ofc!!! but she can’t see herself doing it unless she’s drunk off her arse!!!

maybe mc can convince her...for the fans duh!!! “Give the ppl what they want! Talia! It’s not like you won’t be around music!” “I’ll think about it...nah.”

she’s been busier since the show, able to tour more and WRITE which is what she loves to do

Her secret pleasure is watching those nurse shows and firefighting shows in her free time and those singing shows you already know that’s a given

Wanted to be some form of a nurse growing up but knew she could help people in another way

*inserts* “music Is The best Medicine” overused but true quote here!!

I feel like she’s a r&b lover

listens to those hour long rain sounds on YouTube to help herself fall asleep

she‘s not the best cook but she’s a foodie and she’s down to try new food always

occasionally her and Tim are jake’s Guinea pigs when he’s whipping something up for his menu

and hates eating the same things all the time unless it’s breakfast! There’s not too much more you can do with that

that’s also her specialty, making breakfast for u in bed

Morning afters with her are intimate but humorous. She’ll poke fun if you’re both looking crazy, always joking and in the best mood whether things got physical or not she’s just happy to have you here 🥲

I think her love language is quality time

if you’re playing her route and Lucy is the ex, and you’ve decided to fully commit to each other I deff see Lucy still trying to pull some shit outside of the show just because she feels like she can but once Talia see’s that it’s really starting to get to you despite how much you try to brush it off or snap at Lucy or even Talia!!! Talia is on Lucy’s ass in seconds! She doesn’t need a ex to ruin her possible future , “you’re not gonna fuck up this good thing I’ve got just cause you’re flimsy at relationships babe, so go be a cunt somewhere else or you’ll be sorry. I promise.”

anthem: Snow Tha Product — Shut up

#litg #litg talia #litg jake #litg Tim #litg Rohan #litg mc #litg oc #litg Hannah #litg3 #litg2 #litg moodboard #litg headcanon #litg headcanons #she’s my fav along with sammi and this is my first time getting to know sammi since I’m in talias route #I’m going to try and reduce these to not making them as lengthy lol #this has also sat in my draft for about a week now #litg sammi #litg Allegra #litg Lucy

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