#mysterious chemical that can bring people back to life. Not even I know okay

[announzingforya]

the verge to create a set of ocs with the most gruesome backstories I’ve ever created

[yo by the way the tags are a little uh. Gruesome. Serious warning for that……..]

[punchdrunkdoc]

Part 3, Chapter 4

Summary: After the events of S3, Matt Murdock is trying to once again balance life as a lawyer and a vigilante. But he’s been scarred by loss and betrayal - will a mysterious new neighbour help him heal? Or will her secrets drag him back into the darkness?

Notes: This is a slow burn romance with an original female character, told in 3 (maybe 4??) parts. There is mystery, intrigue, action/violence and angst - all the good stuff!

Also available on AO3 and Wattpad

Masterlist

Reference pics

————–

PART 3

Chapter 4

I’m a good person; I’m worthy of love.

I’m a good person; I’m worthy of love.

Those eight words became Calina’s silent mantra. She recited them to the mirror as she brushed her teeth in the morning. She chanted them on her daily six-mile run. They were the soundtrack to her sparring matches with her sisters, and the echo she fell asleep to at night.

She hoped that if she repeated them often enough, the sentiment would start to penetrate.

And it was…maybe…starting to work.

Her guilt about Italy had definitely started to wane, at least - thanks to her talk with Katya. Somehow, the act of just voicing what she felt had helped lessen the sting of that particular emotion.

Which probably explained why so many people went to therapy.

Calina knew she’d probably benefit from a few sessions with a trained professional, but it wasn’t exactly practical in their current situation. So in the meantime, she’d continue with her mantra and try to believe the words.

I’m a good person; I’m worthy of love.

The task to bring down Volkov was also helping. She and the other Widows took shifts surveilling the footage from the cameras planted in the Jersey warehouse, and the mind-numbing hours spent watching the black and white footage provided a nice distraction from her negative thoughts. 

And then, less than a week later, they got the evidence they needed.

The whole group sat around the dining room table reviewing the scenes that Viktoria had alerted them to during her turn at the monitor. They watched as lab equipment and various chemicals were delivered to the property. They watched as men in protective coveralls sterilised volumetric flasks and set up distillation kits on newly constructed worktops. And they watched as soldiers in tactical gear started patrolled the site at night.

Volkov’s operation was underway.

The mood around the table was less jubilant than expected. Even though they had the confirmation they wanted, the tangible proof of Volkov’s plan for them was sobering.The chemicals being mixed and the serum being manufactured was meant for them. Meant to control them and subjugate them and turn them back into mindless killers.

“Can you turn it off, Anya?” Katya asked. “I think we’ve seen enough.”

“Yeah,” Sofia agreed. She rubbed her brow as if the footage had given her a headache.

Viktoria spoke up next, her voice equally as dispirited. “Okay, now that we know what’s going on, what’s our next step?”

Everyone looked to Yelena. She was seated at the head of the table, twirling one of her butterfly knives, her reaction to the video evident in the way she was flicking the dangerous weapon - as if imagining Volkov on the receiving end of the blade.

“I have an idea,” she said. “But I’m not sure you’re going to like it.”

“What is it?” Calina asked.

“We wait.”

“You’re right. I don’t like it.” Inessa replied. “We have our proof. We need to raid the place and-”

“And what? Kill them all? Take them hostage?”

“Either’s fine with me.” That came from one of the newer members of the group - Sanvi. She was glaring at the paused video, her jaw clenched in anger.

“There’s too much risk,” Yelena responded. “We’ll only get one shot at this before we lose our element of surprise.”

“So what’s the plan exactly?” Katya asked. “What are we waiting for?”

“We need Volkov. We need to wait until he’s on site before we go in. If we take him down, this is all over. We’ll be free.”

“How can we be sure he’ll show up?” Sanvi asked.

“Men like him are control freaks. They can only delegate for so long before they need to see for themselves that their plan is being followed. He’ll show up - I’m sure of it. And when he does, we’ll be there.”

“We’ll need to set up a base in Jersey,” Anya added, working through the logistics.

“Yes,” Yelena replied. “We’ll need a team close-by and on-call for when the moment comes.”

“I volunteer as tribute,” Katya said, raising her hand. A few of the Widows laughed at her reference to the movie they’d watched the other night. And a few other hands went in the air as well.

Including Calina’s.

Yelena eyed her critically. “You’re not just using this as an excuse to be closer to Murdock, are you?”

Calina shook her head forcefully. “No. I want to be a part of this. I need to be a part of this.”

She couldn’t explain why she felt so strongly about joining this mission. Maybe it was her way of atoning for leaving before. She’d been content to try to build a life in New York while her sisters did the hard work of freeing other Widows. Katya may not regard that as abandonment, but Calina did. And she wanted to try to erase that bit of red from her ledger. Balance the bad with something good - like backing up her team during the last stages of their battle for freedom.

“Even if that involves killing Volkov or his men?” Yelena asked Calina. “You told me you couldn’t take the violence anymore. I need to know the people on this team have the resolve to do whatever it takes.”

Whatever it takes. Yelena’s words were an eerie echo of Calina’s thoughts from that early morning on the pier six weeks ago. Back then she’d sworn to herself that she would go to any lengths to gain her freedom and get back to Matt. That vow had been sorely tested by Italy - and she still felt there were some limits to ‘whatever’ - but they had to do this.

Volkov had to be taken down.

And if that included killing again…so be it. She would live with the consequences.

For this - for her freedom, for her sisters, and for her future - she would take on one more stain on her soul. She’d never forgive herself if she sat this mission out and someone got hurt…or worse.

“I can do it, Yelena.” Calina held the other Widow’s gaze, and let her see the determination in her eyes.

Yelena nodded. “Okay. Let’s get to work.”

The mansion became a whirlwind of activity as they put Yelena’s plan in motion. A team of nine was selected to set up the base in Jersey. Anya found a property close enough to the warehouse for them to be able to mobilise in a hurry, but far enough away to give the Widows some cover. Weapons were gathered, transport was arranged, and gear was packed.

A few hours later, Calina stood in the doorway of her bedroom, a small suitcase at her feet and a bag slung over her shoulder. She surveyed the room, now devoid of any hint of her life here. There was no book on the bedside table. No running shoes shoved under the desk, and no necklace hanging over the mirror on the vanity table.

She’d miss this room, with its rustic charm and the view of the grey, churning water of the harbour. She’d miss the sound of the seagulls and the early morning calls of the fishermen.

She’d miss it…but she hoped she’d never have to return here.

She hoped this next mission would be the last, and that this would all be over soon.    

She grabbed the hoodie draped over the edge of the bed - the last of her possessions to be packed away. She brought the fabric up to her nose, breathing in deep. She’d stolen it from Matt at Christmas, wanting a tangible memento of their wonderful night together, and it still retained a hint of his scent. Instead of shoving it in her bag, she slipped the oversized sweater on and tucked her hands into the long sleeves, feeling surrounded by him again.

She would see him soon.

She hadn’t been lying to Yelena when she’d volunteered for this mission - it wasn’t just an excuse to be nearer to Matt. But it was a side benefit she was definitely going to take advantage of.

She needed to know if she could face him again. She needed to know if her mantra had worked, and she could stand to be in his presence without feeling overwhelmed by guilt and fear.

She needed to know if there was hope for them. 

-------------

Bang…bang.bang. Bang…bang.bang.

Matt stumbled out of his run across the rooftops as he picked up the sound of a familiar code.

Dash…dot.dot. Dash…dot.dot.

Calina’s code. Her message to him. The beacon that had brought them together two weeks ago on the crane above the Hudson.

And now he was hearing it again. He froze and cocked his head, trying to pinpoint the faint metallic noise.

But there was just silence.

Had he hallucinated it? In his desperate desire to see her, was he imagining the sound of her call?

Bang…bang.bang. Bang…bang.bang.

He smiled as the code rang out again. Nope. Not his imagination.

She was here.

He took off running in the direction of the sound. Not near the docks this time, but further inland and to the south. He flew across the skyline of the city until he ended up on top of a luxury spa, the night air around him perfumed by aromatherapy oils and hot wax.

And the subtle fragrance of sea salt and strawberries.

Calina

She emerged from behind a large ventilation shaft and he could hear a shy smile in her voice as she greeted him. “Hi.”

Matt didn’t hesitate. There was no crane between them this time. No metal barrier to keep them apart, so he strode forward, took her in his arms and kissed her.

His intention must have been clear on his face because Calina didn’t seem surprised by his sudden embrace. She just wound her arms around his neck and returned his kiss. It was a messy, hard and passionate kiss, with all of the frustrated longing of the last couple of weeks - the last couple of months - stoking the fire of it. 

Matt may have come to terms with their separation, but he still missed her with each and every moment that passed.

And now that she was back within reach, he wanted her as close as possible. He tightened his hold on her and buried his fingers in the braids of her hair and slid his thigh between hers. The contact caused Calina to moan, and Matt swallowed the sound as his own lust ratcheted up in response.

He hitched her up into his arms, and used the air vent behind her to brace her weight. Her back hit the hollow structure with a clang, but neither of them seemed to notice. Matt sank into the cradle of her thighs, and Calina tightened her legs around his waist, as they kissed and kissed and kissed, their movements as they rocked against each other frenzied and almost desperate.

It was amazing…but it still wasn’t enough to sate Matt’s desires. He wanted her naked. He wanted her in his bed again, with days to worship her body and explore every inch of her skin. He wanted her on her back, he wanted her moving over him, he wanted to spend hours between her legs, and bring her to climax a million times.

He wanted everything with her.

But all they had was this. Stolen moments in the dark, high above the city.

He tilted Calina’s head and deepened the kiss as he ground his hips against her core, unable to resist the sensation of the friction against his hardening cock. But then a harsh wail from a police siren rang out from the next block over, jolting Matt back to reality. He broke out of the kiss, breathing harshly in frustration.

This wasn’t their time. And Calina deserved better than this place - a dirty concrete rooftop exposed to the prying eyes of the neighbouring apartments.

He trailed his lips across her cheek to bury his head in his favourite spot beneath her ear. “I’m sorry,” he whispered into her neck.

“What for?” Calina answered, rubbing the exposed skin between his suit and his mask. “That was a hell of a welcome.”

Matt laughed and tilted his head back. “Hi,” he said, belatedly.

It was her turn to laugh. “Hi.”

He dropped a quick kiss on the tip of her nose and stepped away from the vent, letting her slide to her feet. Then he took her in his arms again, reluctant to let her go completely.

“How long are you here for?” he asked, dreading the answer.

She sighed. “Not long. In fact, I should probably head back.”

He looked away, trying to hide his disappointment. But she pressed her fingers to his cheek and turned his face back to her. “But I have good news,” she said. “We’re close to the end, Matt.”

“Really?”

She nodded. “We’ve set a trap for Volkov - we’re just waiting for him to walk into it.”

“That’s good,” he said, squeezing her tighter to him. “That’s really good.”

“And there’s more…,” she teased.

“I’m not sure I can take any more good news. It’s such an unfamiliar concept,” he teased. “But hit me with it.”

“The trap is…close by. So you’ll be seeing me around more often.”

“That really is good news.” He dropped a kiss on her lips, and they spent long, lazy moments exploring each other’s mouths, the world around them falling away as they basked in the luxury of being able to touch each other.

His duty to his city, the danger she was in being in New York, the possible prying eyes around them all vanished into insignificance as he held the woman he loved in his arms.

But inevitably - and all too soon - she ended the kiss and dropped her arms from around his shoulders.

“Time to go?” he guessed, catching her hand as she stepped away.

“Yeah,” she said, the single word infused with so much sadness.

Matt remembered his vow from a couple of weeks ago - to not wallow in the despair of their parting, but to cherish the moments they managed to steal together. So he smiled at her, and pressed his lips to the back of her hand. “I’ll see you around, then, sweetheart.”

His positive outlook seemed to help Calina. Her sad, downcast eyes lifted to him, and she met his smile with one of her own. “Yeah. I’ll see you around.”

With a final squeeze of her hand, Matt turned and ran towards the edge of the rooftop. As he raced across the concrete, he flung one end of his billy club across to the adjacent building, using the weapon as a grappling hook. In one flowing movement, he launched himself off the edge and swung across the gap to land on the fire escape.

“Show-off!” he heard Calina shout from behind him.

He laughed at the now-familiar tease and started leaping up the metal staircase, his senses split between concentrating on his climb…and following Calina as she travelled in the opposite direction.

She flowed across the rooftops, her movements quick and graceful. And he had to resist the overwhelming urge to track her all the way back to her new base. To find out where she was staying and what this mysterious trap was.

It went against everything that made him the man he was to let her head into danger alone. He wanted to protect her. Or, at least, be a partner in her fight.

But that’s exactly what it was - her fight.

Not his.

He had to trust that she could take care of herself. Trust that the other Widows would have her back. Trust that this would all be over soon and they would be together again.

It was a lot of trust for a man who struggled with the concept.

So he opted for a different concept - one he was much more familiar with.

Faith.

He had faith that she would come back to him - free and unharmed and ready for their life together.

--------------

“Three guesses where Calina was,” Inessa teased when Calina returned to the safe-house.

Calina just rolled her eyes and collapsed onto the soft worn couch in front of the bank of monitors. They’d converted the entire top floor of a condemned apartment building into their new base, and were watching Volkov’s warehouse 24/7 while waiting for his arrival.

The nine widows deployed to Jersey had decided to operate on a rotation system - alternating between surveillance duty, training, weapons maintenance and rest -  to ensure everyone would be at peak fighting fitness when the time eventually came to engage.

Tonight Calina had decided to use her few hours of downtime to visit Matt.

And she was so glad she had.

She’d been so nervous waiting for him as she tapped out his code. As the clanging sound seemed to echo in the night air, her heart had raced with a mixture of excitement and trepidation.

What if, as soon as she locked eyes on him, all the guilt and self-loathing returned? What if they were just an impossibility now?

But she needn’t have worried. The moment Matt landed on the rooftop and strode towards her, passionate intent evident in his every step, the trepidation disappeared. Everything suddenly felt so…right.

They were not an impossibility. They were an inevitability.

She was meant to be with him. No one could ever love him more. No one could ever want him more.

As he took her in his arms and kissed the life out of her, she felt nothing but an overwhelming sense of ‘home’. For the first time in her life she truly understood the meaning of that concept.

Matt was her home. He was her safe haven, and the place she belonged.

Being with him quieted all her doubts and insecurities and fears. When he kissed her, she did feel worthy of his love. When he caressed her cheek and called her ‘sweetheart’, she knew she could make him happy. When he held her tightly against him, reluctant to let her go, she believed that all of the darkness in her soul and the misdeeds of her past could be forgiven.

Being with him wasn’t the problem - it was the answer to everything.

It was only now, an hour later, when the heady warmth of their encounter had worn off and she was once again alone with her thoughts, that those doubts started to creep back in.

Which meant only one thing: she had to spend as much time with him as she could.

————–

Things are finally looking up for Matt & Calina. But that can't possibly last...right?

Chapter 5

Tag list: @hollandorks @stilldreaming666 @yanna-banana @chezagnes @tearoseart-blog​ @acharliecoxedfan @freckledbabyyy

If you’d like to be added - let me know!

[irvincosmetics]

Understanding Pigmentation Causes and How to Tackle Them!

Ever find yourself wondering why your skin has those random dark spots or uneven patches? Same here! Pigmentation—it’s one of those beauty mysteries many of us struggle with but rarely understand. The good news? You're about to become an expert in all things pigmentation. By the end of this blog, you’ll know what causes it, how to manage it, and most importantly, how to get your glow back.

And if you're itching for personalized solutions? Truly Permanent Beauty has your back!

What Exactly is Pigmentation?

Pigmentation refers to the coloring of your skin—a process controlled by a magical pigment called melanin. Melanin doesn’t just make your skin look fabulous; it also protects you from harmful UV rays. Think of it as your skin's built-in SPF!

But… things can go a little haywire. Sometimes, your skin ends up producing too much (or too little!) melanin in certain areas, causing uneven skin tone. This is when we see conditions like hyperpigmentation (dark spots) or hyperpigmentation (lighter spots).

Also read about: Top 5 Proven Treatments to Get Rid of Acne Scars

It’s perfectly normal, and you’re not alone—skin pigmentation is a common concern for so many people. But understanding why it happens is the first step to managing it.

Why Does Pigmentation Happen?

Now, this is where it gets interesting! Pigmentation isn’t caused by just one villain—it’s more like an entourage of possible culprits.

1. Sun Exposure – The Ultimate Melanin Trigger

Spent a little too much time basking in the sun without sunscreen? That golden glow might come back to haunt you. UV rays are melanin’s alarm clock, calling it to the rescue when your skin is exposed to sunlight. While it’s great for protecting against damage, it can also cause those unwanted dark spots (hello, sunspots!).

Pro Tip:

Always slap on some sunscreen—SPF 30 or higher—every single day. Yes, even when it’s cloudy or you’re inside!

2. Hormonal Imbalances – Blame It on the Hormones

Got melasma? Those larger, brownish patches often found on the face have a bff in hormonal changes. Pregnancy, birth control, and even menopause can flip your hormones and lead to pigmentation changes.

Fun fact? Melasma is often nicknamed the "mask of pregnancy" because it’s so common in expectant moms.

3. Acne and Scarring – The Aftermath of a Breakout

We HATE how unfair this is. You finally get that pimple to go away, and boom—a dark mark is left behind to remind you of its unwelcome visit. Post-inflammatory hyperpigmentation (PIH) happens when your skin heals after damage (like acne, cuts, or burns), leaving dark marks in its wake.

4. Aging – Not Just Wrinkles

Here’s the thing about aging—it brings along its own set of skin adventures, including age spots. These are a type of sun damage that has lived rent-free on your skin for decades before finally showing up in your 40s or 50s.

Quick Win:

Early pigmentation treatment can reduce the appearance of age spots—so don’t wait to address it!

5. Other Factors – Because Life Happens

Don’t underestimate the power of stress, pollution, genetics, or even your medication! Sometimes pigmentation is just out of your control—but don’t worry, solutions exist.

How to Fight and Fix Pigmentation

Okay, you know the causes. Now it’s time for action! Here are some of the top ways to tackle pigmentation and feel amazing in your skin again.

1. Sunscreen is Non-Negotiable

Hear us out—this is your best defense. No matter what treatment you try, it won’t be effective unless you guard against sun exposure. Repeat after us: "I will wear sunscreen every day."

2. Exfoliation for the Win

Regular exfoliation can help remove dead skin cells and fade pigmentation. Opt for a gentle chemical exfoliant (like glycolic or lactic acid) to brighten your complexion over time.

Warning:

Don’t overdo it! Over-exfoliating can actually make your pigmentation worse. Be gentle with your skin, boo!

3. Vitamin C to the Rescue

A nutrient AND a brightening powerhouse? Yes, please! Vitamin C serums can help fade dark spots, protect against sun damage, and give your skin a radiant glow.

4. Professional Skin Treatments

For stubborn pigmentation, professional treatments can do wonders. At Truly Permanent Beauty, we offer advanced solutions tailored to your skin’s unique needs, including:

Laser Treatments – Zap away dark spots with precision.

Microdermabrasion – Gently exfoliate and boost cell turnover for brighter skin.

Chemical Peels – Deeply exfoliate to reveal fresh, even-toned skin.

Our experienced team will create a plan just for YOU!

5. Hydroquinone and Retinol

Spot-correctors like hydroquinone or vitamin A derivatives like retinol can work serious magic. They promote cell renewal and block overactive melanin production. Just remember to use them under professional guidance.

6. Adopt a Pigmentation-Friendly Routine

When in doubt, keep it simple with a solid skincare routine:

Cleanser

Serum (Vitamin C or niacinamide)

Moisturizer

SPF (no excuses!)

Why Custom Solutions Work Best

Here’s the thing about pigmentation—it’s personal. What works for one person might not work for another. That’s why consulting with experts (like the team at Truly Permanent Beauty!) is so important.

We understand that your skin tells its own story, and we’re here to help you write the next chapter—with fewer spots and more confidence!

It’s Time to Glow

Pigmentation can be a confidence downer, but with the right knowledge (and a little love), clear, radiant skin is achievable! Whether it’s tweaking your skincare routine or exploring professional treatments, you don’t have to face pigmentation alone.

Looking for personalized solutions? Book a consultation with Truly Permanent Beauty today. Our experts are ready to help you take control of your skin and love your glow!

[thelittleboyfromloveactually]

Two Shorten the Road

part 1

joel dawson x reader

warnings: cussing? idk, bad writing.....fluff, cuteness, monsters(is this a warning), mentions of death, SPOILERS

word count: 2154

prompt: when your best friend decides to leave your colony to go find the love of his life, you decide to join him on his journey even if you aren’t so happy about where this journey is going

Welp I did it, I took it into my own hands. I am writing a joel dawson series. Because we👏need 👏more👏joel👏fics👏 it’s basically the movie, almost the same script but obviously slightly different…ENJOY! <3

No one in my generation or later had a typical upbringing, I mean some of us did but then the world ended. This type of thing sounds straight out of some apocalyptic movie, but we basically live in one now. Agatha 616, an asteroid heading straight for earth, I know, so original. So we all came together and did what we do best, blow things up. Yup, we blew up teh asteroid, and humanity was saved! We thought. But here’s the thing about rockets, they are made of a bunch of chemical compounds which eventually rained back down on earth. Suddenly there were these Aileen creatures that mutated and started eating us. Ants, lizards, roaches, crocodiles, you name it. Our president was even killed by a giant moth. Ya….not so original now huh? We suddenly need tanks to kill ants, oh man I remember the good old days when a shoe would do just fine. Sometimes even the tanks didn’t work. Eventually the really big ones and our military took each other out and we lost 95% of the human population in a year! Those of us who survived hid, bunkers, caves, panic rooms, all around the world. So for the last seven years I’ve been hiding in an underground bunker. It’s really not as bad as it sounds, and it’s better than getting eaten alive. It’s a great group of people and we all love each other.

“Are you sure they’re asleep?”

“Who?”

“Y/N and joel!”

“Oh ya I’m sure”

“Joel? Y/n?”

“He’s asleep”

Actually we are both awake. Me and my best friend joel have kinda mastered faking being asleep. Our beds are right across from each other so we normally just lie there and make stupid faces at each other. We are the only two single people in our bunker. Nice huh? Joel is my best friend. I met him when I joined the colony. He’s the sweetest. It’s funny cause everyone thinks we should just have sex already because that’s literally all everyone else does. But we are way above that. Anyway, joel is in love with his girlfriend from before the colony, her name is Aimee. With one “I” and two “e”s. He loves to talk about her, he writes her letters. So in reality, I am the only one who is not in love in this bunker. I’ve never had a boyfriend, ever, even before the world ended.

We don’t really get any sleep. The moaning kinda keeps us awake. I got up and out of my bed and headed for the kitchen. I heard Joel’s bed creak and then his footsteps as he followed behind me. Another annoying thing about being down here is that to get to the kitchen from my room, you have to walk though other people’s bedrooms. Oh shit, they are busy, why would they leave their door open. Me and Joel stopped.

“Oh” joel and I said in unison

“Hey Y/N! Hey Joel!” Ava said

“Oh hey Ava” Joel said, we didn’t dare look over to our left.

“Y/N how’s it going?” Tim asked

“T-totally good tim, h-how are you doing” I asked

“Yeah, good” he responded

“I uh we couldn’t sleep” said Joel looking at the ceiling

“Ya we know the feeling” Ava said with a laugh

“Yeah probably not for the…..same reasons” joel said looking straight ahead

“Your guyses door was open, did you…did you know that?” I asked

“Yeah we know” they said

I shook my head and knitted my eyebrows together

“Okay” joel trailed off

Ever since Tim’s parents were eaten by a swarm of termites he and Ava have gotten really close, in every way.

“Okay, goodnight” joel said as we walked

Basically everyone is coupled up down here, a baby was born last winter! Welcome to the apocalypse kid. Ok if we ever get out of this, that would be an awesome story to tell your kids. “Oh ya I was born in an underground bunker doing a monster apocalypse” “yes exactly like World War Z but with bugs bigger than a 5 story building”. I mean come on.

So your probably wonder how the hell we get food, we’ll we have a cow. Gurdy. Gurdy is great. We also have a hunting party that brings back whatever they can from the surface. It’s gotten harder and harder, cause we ran out of bullets. And facing one of those things with a handmade weapon is just as hard as it sounds. It’s very very difficult. I go with them….sometimes. I still get scared. But I’ve been out quite a lot, especially compared to my man joel over here. I’ve been out maybe 30 times, he’s been out…maybe once, or not even. He’s the chef of the bunker. He makes super good Minestrone.

Me and joel like to hang out with Mavis. A robot. Yup. Not much for conversation, her batter is shot. Just like every other mavis I would imagine. When I’m not hunting we hang out with her. But sometimes I just go read. Reading and joel keep me sane. I mean sometimes joel drives me insane but I still love him. I have quite the collection of books too! I’ve got Emma by Jane Austen, a couple random ones that we found, all the hunger games and Harry Potter books, some mysteries that stopped being mysteries after a while, and then of course some smutty romance books for personal entertainment.

Joel likes to say that his thing is target practice. He has never hit the target but ya know, gotta entertain yourself. I think his thing is drawing though, he has this book that he draws in from Aimee. It’s really cool actually. He’s really good.

I sat watching Joel as he tried to hit the target, laughing a little every time he missed. It was cute how hard he tried.

“Shut up” he said shaking his laugh away

I laughed again, but then suddenly the lights started flickering. You could hear screeches and creeks echoing through the bunker. Joel turned to look at me. Worry and determination in his eyes. We both scrambled out of the room and into the kitchen where everyone was preparing.

“Hustle, hustle people we’ve gotta move”

I turned to look at Joel but then realized that he wasn’t next to me. Where did he go? Worry flooded through me. Suddenly the clanking of our weapon started behind me.

“Hey guys!” Joel said as he rammed into the railing, I shook my head. “Guys! I’ve got the weapons” he smiled at me

A few people walked over to him taking them out of his hands

“Stay” said Tim

“W-what?” Joel asked looking around in confusion

Everyone was talking and barking orders “grab what you need and let’s go! Y/N you coming?”

My eyes shot open “yes! Yup!” I jumped up and grabbed the bow and arrow from Joel.

“W-what's happening?” He asked innocently “what’s going on?”

“There’s a breach” said Tim

“What do you mean? Like inside the bunker breach?!” He asked

“Yes joel! Now come on!” I told him, patting him on the pack as I followed the others

He followed me and watched the plan get arranged

“Anna, Y/N and I will engage. Anderson and Tom plank him”

“Plank him, ya ok where do you guys need me? You want me to uh come through the rear or..?” Joel asked eagerly

“I don’t think your going to pass this joel” I told him

“Pass what? You guys need help, let me help” said clutching his crossbow

“You gonna make me say it?” said Sam

“Say what?!” God he was so adorably clueless

“You can’t handle it joel, your shook” said Sam, we all began getting into positions

“Ya ok, yes so you guys don’t get scared..ever?” He asked still getting ready to fight

“We get scared, we all get scared joel, but you get really scared” said Sam

“They are trying to make you feel bad joel” I said sweetly, trying to calm him down

“We love you joel”

“But your a liability”

“Ok why did that speech feel so rehearsed? And what about Y/N? She’s like…ya know?” He said bobbing his head

“Joel-“ suddenly the bunker shook and the lights flicked again

“Ok 30 meters out! Let’s move!” And we were off

Leaving joel and some others behind. You could hear the growling of whatever we were up against

I followed the others and listened carefully. I was freaking shaking. Don’t ask how I got sucked into becoming one the the hunters. Kinda just happened and I was just-

“OH SHIT!” I heard someone yell, it was too dark to see. Someone was gone, that thing took them. I couldn’t even see it. Oh fuck my life. Everyone began scattering, running away from the monster. I stopped running to take a breath, when I realized I was alone. Nicely done Y/N. The lights kept flickering. I heard something blow up in the distance.

“Conned? Conner?” I heard a whisper, one I knew all too well. Shit, joel. I ran toward the sound, and had no idea I was also running toward certain death. I stopped running. There it was, that thing. I’d never seen this before. I didn’t recognize it. I stayed silent, not moving at all. It slowly crawled over a shower curtain. Oh fuck. He was going toward joel! I quickly grabbed my bow and arrow and shot it. Right though the face. Next to its….eye I guess you could call it. Joel stood there, frozen.

I slowly walked over to him “Joel, hey are you ok?” I asked as I slipped my hand into his. He was trembling. Tears ran down his cheeks. He has a bad freezing problem, so I've been helping him work on it.

About an hour later I sat with Joel, still holding his hand as he stared out into space. We could hear everyone talking. How could this have happened?

“It ripped through steal”

“Anderson and I resealed the Breach point, nothings getting in that way again”

“But why did it happen?”

I tried to toon it out, and I hoped Joel did too.

“Joel, do you wanna talk about it?” I asked squeezing his hand, he looked so sad, which just crushed me

He shook his head

“Ok….” I nodded, I leaned into hug him but was interrupted by his voice

“How far away is Aimee's colony?” He asked

I pulled back, looking at him confused. The talking stopped and everyone look at him

“What?” Tim asked

“Aimee’s colony, how far away is it?” He repeated

“About 85 miles” he said as he furrowed his brows

“How long will it take to get there?”

“What do you mean joel?” I asked leaning closer to him

“Just humor me, how long?” He insisted

“7 days” said Tim

“Someone who’s armed and trained would hardly last 50miles, but you…joel” Ava said, I felt bad for him, he really didn’t deserve any of this

“Alright” Tim continued “now I need volunteers”

“I’m gonna go” joel said

No one said anything, they just stared

“It’s an impossible journey joel” said Tim, crossing his arms

Joel stood up, moving around my chair. “No im serious…I love you guys but there’s only one person in this world who ever truly made me happy and she’s only 85 miles away” he said strongly “I’m gonna go see her” I could see his mind was made up

God he was such a romantic, how could you not love this guy? Sure it hurts when your best friend tells you that you didn’t make him truly happy. Especially when you maybe sorta kinda have a crush on him.

He let out a breath “woah, that felt awesome” he said as he walked off to start packing

I stood there for a second processing and thinking, but then suddenly my mouth took over and well….

“I’m coming with you!” I said, he froze “I mean you can’t leave me here with these middle aged people, and your my best friend so” I shrugged

“I’ll come back for you I promise” he walked over to me “I can’t let you put yourself in even more danger” he said grabbing my arms

“I can’t let you put yourself in danger knowing that I could have helped protect you” I said, he stared blankly at me

I smiled “o-ohK…then I guess…” he trailed off

“Cool I’ll go pack” I skipped past him. Was I scared? Hell yes. But like I said, I needed to help joel and protect him in every way I can. And sure I wasn’t so happy that he was returning to his long lost love but if it made him happy then I would live. And anyway, two do shorten the road.

[sailordiavolo]

suicide prevention month 2021 - things that helped me stay alive

i heard that this month is suicide prevention month in the united states. as someone who’s struggled for many years with suicide myself, and is currently in the mystical “better place”, i feel it’s my duty to open this can of worms. i am unafraid of the stigma that comes with discussing such things.

i’ll go over things that helped me to cope during dark times. these may also apply to being depressed in general (?) because no offense but “drinking water” doesn’t help as much as google seems to think it does. note that these aren’t be all end all solutions, more like techniques that helped me to stay sane on some of my worst days.

1. get rid of everything that’s an immediate danger to your health.

if you’re actively a danger to yourself, safety-proof your home. don’t keep sharp objects lying around, or anything dangerous of the like. get rid of anything toxic or chemical, and don’t keep medicines in excess.

2. if you can’t make yourself happy, try to mildly amuse yourself instead

thinking “happy thoughts” doesn’t really work for me, especially if i’m in the throes of a depressive episode. i do have many things that make me happy, but i seem to forget about all of them in dark times. that being said, really dumb jokes get me every time. if i can make myself laugh, smile or chuckle, i’ve already made it 10 times easier for myself. and if i can do that, usually it’s easy to make myself forget about the original reason i was upset in the first place.

dear reader, i don’t know what would count as “mildly amusing” to you, but here’s some things that work for me.

i have a self care playlist on youtube. mine’s pretty dumb, but making a playlist like that of things that you find entertaining or amusing might help. another amazing one is distantcry’s worst beat ever collection.

very specific songs that really get me going include metrostation’s shake it, botdf’s bewitched, rm’s expensive girl, and she past away’s ruh.

3. do some self care activities

self care is very very important. when you feel like you’re absolute worst, that’s a free pass to be as selfish as you need to be until you feel better. no job, no person, no drama is worth dying over. all of that can wait until after you’re finished what you’re doing. if you’re not really sure what to do as self care activities, i’ll list some suggestions.

take a hot bath, if possible. if you have the resources, add bubbles, flower petals, bathe salts or candles. i did this the other day and sat in the bath and ate crumpets. it was amazing. if not, have a steaming hot shower. (i know it’s hard to find the energy, but it’ll help, i promise)

watch your favourite childhood show, or your favourite show at the moment, or play a video game.

sleep all day, or take the day off.

eat your favourite food, or the best food available to you right now.

spend some money if you have it. personally, i never spend all my money in a week, i save some in case i have a panic attack or something so then i can spend money on something totally random to make myself feel better.

change up your appearance. i usually end up cutting my hair short or randomly dying it, but this can also mean dressing in a way that makes you feel good, painting your nails, or doing your makeup.

4. know how to comfort yourself

this is related to the last one but knowing what brings you comfort is very important. it took me a very long time to figure out what things i find comforting. list the things that you find comforting, and you can use those to help yourself feel better. it might be music, interests, even something abstract.

if you can’t think of anything, then make sure to pay attention to things that make you feel nice/comforted, and list them down. it’s also important to know what will send you over the edge, so you can avoid it.

5. distraction topics

this may help with anxiety as well, but having distraction topics can help you to calm down and forget about what you were worried about. it’s good to have a few distraction topics up your sleeve in case of emergency. i’ll list a few of my favourites, but if you ever need one don’t be afraid to ask me directly, or send me an ask on my blog! i have a ridiculous amount of misc knowledge just floating around.

dinosaur fossils of mothers protecting their nest have been found, meaning that dinosaurs probably felt some form of motherly love. love on earth is billions and billions of years old. creatures have loved each other on this planet since before the dawn of history. imagine being the first organism to love on this planet and what that must’ve been like

some cave paintings were animated. they had different frames painted over each other, and the flickering of a flame in the cave would cause the images to appear as if they were moving. isn’t that extremely profound?

i saw somewhere, that scientists attempted to see what an electron was made out of, or something to that effect. it’s made of a pool of energy, which is essentially nothing. no form, no matter. everything is made out of nothing.

6. romanticise your future

a lot of us probably don’t have a concept of the future, or if we do, it’s something that sounds absolutely horrible. well, forget about that! think instead about how hot n sexy you’ll be in your 30’s, 40’s, etc. don’t worry about how you’ll get there for now, your future self can take care of that. think about your ideal life, and get excited like it’s absolutely going to happen. the more you think about it, the more it will become true.

7. romanticise your current self

nobody in your life understands you? that’s because you’re the hot brooding mysterious one. struggle with very dark thoughts? omg you’d be so powerful as a jujutsu sorcerer. people are staring? it’s because they’re in love with you. people whispering as you go by? also in love with you. no friends? the universe had to keep you humble because otherwise you’d be too perfect. hate the way you look today? you’re just a littel troll babie. the more amusing these thoughts are, the better. and if you think these things for long enough, eventually it will trick your brain into thinking it’s true. who’s gonna check you? the telepaths?

8. put things into perspective

i am prone to delusional thoughts when i’m panicked, and i have to remind myself to reel it in. think about it, you’re more afraid of answering the phone than you are of death? doesn’t sound very cash money of you, bro.

think about how many years you’ve really lived, especially if you think you’ve failed in life. take 12 years off your age, because childhood doesn’t count. also take off any other years which you were forced to live the way someone else wanted you to live, rather than for myself.

for example, i’m currently 23. my household was pretty strict, so i couldn’t really do anything before age 18. which gives me a grand total of 5 years of me trying to figure out life by myself. it helps me to remember how young i actually am in the grand scheme of things, and that i have plenty of time to still figure things out.

9. find a safe outlet for dark urges

for me, art and journaling really helped. music too, especially when i felt like i could relate to either the lyrics, or just the tone/mood/feel of the song. it might be exercise, or you may like to do creative writing or make oc’s. sometimes you may just need a friend or someone to listen.

if you don’t have anyone to talk to, you can message me or shoot me an anon

10. sleep it off

sleep is not going to cure anything, but if i’m pushed over the edge and am struggling with dark thoughts, going to sleep almost always helps. most of the time i still feel like shit in the morning, but no longer in the mood to try anything hasty.

lastly: suicide is not the easy way out

note: i’m gonna be discussing my own experiences with suicide in this part, so if you don’t want to see that, then don’t read past this point

suicide is not the easy way out. it’s messy and it’s ugly and it’s painful and it’s gonna bring out the worst in people. i’ve been struggling with it since age 19.

one particular attempt landed me in the hospital after i swallowed a bunch of painkillers. i couldn’t think or speak properly, i was slurring my words and tripping over myself. my doctor brushed me off and said that it “would probably get better” with time, but it never did. it improved, but my mind has never been the same as it once was, and one of my biggest insecurities to this day is when i struggle to learn new things or get things mixed up that i shouldn’t. i struggle to learn the simplest of things, and my reaction times tend to be very slow.

the point is, sometimes you don’t die, sometimes you just end up hurting yourself in a way that won’t get better. nobody needs that. if had’ve known how to calm myself down back then, i might not’ve tried.

i don’t mind talking about it now, since i’ve dedicated so much time in learning how to uplift myself. i may be in the “better place” now, but you don’t need to rush yourself to be better immediately. sometimes you need to be patient, use baby steps, or learn to accomodate yourself where you are. these things take time. that’s okay.

and remember, you are loved and very much needed to be here on the planet with us.

[crashingmeteorz]

post-war ba sing se bimbo headcanons

so zuko becomes the firelord, and jin and jet think it’s hilarious. he’s so good at it. he’s so charismatic. they’re like “who the hell is this guy? when did he get mature and responsible???” and song’s like “when zuko wasn’t doing stupid shit, he was stopping you two from doing stupid shit, i saw this coming a mile away.”

jin joins the kyoshi warriors, and is overwhelmed by all the pretty girls she’s working with, but for the most part it becomes a sisterhood. she will forever and always have a severe crush on suki, however, and really, can you blame her? so when suki reciprocates, jin writes song a four-page essay about it.

anyway, when zuko asks the warriors to come to the capital, obviously jin’s there, too. jet and song show up almost immediately after jin does.

“what, you two are hanging out without us now?” song asks them accusatorily. “it’s not fair that only you get to see jin, zuko.”

“yeah,” jet says. “and i used to see zuko shirtless a few times a week. and i thought i was lucky! now jin’s a kyoshi warrior and she gets to see it every day?”

“she does not!” says zuko. “yeah,” says jin, while shaking her head the opposite.

attempts on zuko’s life are about as common as rain showers, so song starts testing basically everything he eats with some of her chemicals. every time she finds something insidious, she tracks down every link in the chain that got the food to him, and finds a way to rectify the situation. she doesn’t trouble zuko with this, because he’s got enough going on. also, he probably maybe wouldn’t approve of her methods.

(song is not inherently violent, but when it comes to her family, she’s downright vicious).

jet wants to get in on the action, but between song’s disarming sweetness and the kyoshi warrior’s intimidation, zuko’s basically protected. what he isn’t, is good with people.

zuko can make grand dramatic speeches all day long, but when it comes to the council, or local government officials, or merchants, or literally even jet, he’s the same awkward kid jet met on the boat to ba sing se.

“you are never going to make it as firelord.” jet tells him from the couch he’s lounging on while he watches zuko practice a very basic interaction in the mirror.

“okay, fuck you, too.” zuko says miserably.

“sorry, i wasn’t clear,” jet says, standing beside zuko. “you are never going to make it as firelord without me.”

jet tries in vain to get zuko to lie better, to present himself differently, to deceive just a little bit, but it just isn’t happening. zuko doesn’t even want to lie, he doesn’t want to be like his father and azula, so they take a different approach.

instead, jet teaches him how to spot liars, and how to play the game. it’s basic stuff, like let silence linger because they’ll want to fill it if they’re afraid you don’t believe them. ask them bizarre questions so they overcorrect. if they’re complimenting you too much, they’re trying to deceive you.

to jet, it’s survival. to zuko, it’s like a whole world has opened up he never knew about. he hangs on to jet’s every word, and at the end, he asks that jet join him in council meetings, naming him an ambassador from the earth kingdom.

this is how jet discovers that he’s AMAZING at politics. he can’t believe how easy it is. he considers taking it up as a hobby when he gets back to the earth kingdom.

“you can’t do politics as a hobby,” zuko says.

“why not?” jet says. “it’s just fun. it’s not what i’m meant to be doing forever though.”

“do you have a mysterious job back in the earth kingdom none of us know about?” asks jin.

“yes,” says song, irritable from today’s batch of poison discoveries, “he’s working full-time as a little bitch.”

the more meetings jet attends, the more he wonders if politics really is for what he’s meant. arguing and debating delights him and, unlike the exhausted zuko, he leaves the debates feeling energized. but it just feels so bureaucratic, so useless compared to what he did during the war.

he’s so torn about it that he finally asks song for advice.

“i don’t know anything about politics,” she says tiredly. he’s playing idly with her hair after she’s had a long day of Keeping Zuko Alive. “why are you asking me?”

“because you don’t hold back,” jet tells her. “because you let me know when i’ve gone too far.”

song’s glad it’s dark in the lounge, because she can’t believe she’s blushing.

“well,” she says finally. “what would you be in it for?”

“what do you mean?” he says. “i just like it.”

“do you like the attention?” song asks. “are you just interested in the drama of it all? or do you want to make a difference?”

“i want to make a difference,” he says confidently. “i want to help the earth kingdom.”

“well, then, there’s your answer,” song says.

“yeah,” jet agrees. “no politics for me.”

“wait, what?” song asks him, because how did he reach that conclusion?

“it’s just smooth talking and paperwork. it’s not gonna help the earth kingdom,” jet tells her. “i’m not selling out.”

“is that what you think zuko’s doing?” she asks.

“of course not,” jet says, rolling his eyes. “but he’s also the firelord. that’s different.”

“and he’s your best friend,” she reminds him. “and you also happen to be on good terms with the avatar and the leaders of the southern water tribe, so you know you have influential people who will hear you out. if you want to make a difference, this is probably the best way.”

he’s quiet for a while. he almost looks disappointed.

“not every battle is on the battlefield, jet,” song says gently. “it’s not as glamorous, or as dangerous. it’s tedious and difficult and boring. but it’s what’s left, after the war.”

“i guess that’s the thing,” jet says sadly. “i don’t know who i am without the war.”

“i do,” song says with so much sincerity jet almost blushes. almost. he’s still, like, cool.

if they fall into a routine where song fixes his hair into something presentable for council meetings and jet forces her to take a break and enjoy the sunshine once in a while, zuko and jin don’t feel it’s necessary to comment.

for like three days.

“you stole my boyfriend,” zuko accuses song after catching her and jet kissing. the fact that sokka’s napping with his head in zuko’s lap as he says so doesn’t seem to faze him.

“you stole my ostrich horse,” she says, for the last time ever, “so now we’re even.”

“what’s with you and guys with weird facial hair?” jin asks as she stuffs her face with fire flakes, her new favorite treat. “first haru and now jet?”

“haru?” jet squeaks.

“i liked haru’s moustache,” song says thoughtfully. “i thought it made him look mature.”

“at least if jet grew a moustache i’d understand what everyone sees in him,” sokka says sleepily. “no offense.”

“you’re just mad i kissed zuko first,” huffs jet.

jet stops shaving that week. everyone notices.

when song and jet finally prepare to go back to the earth kingdom, jet privately asks zuko if it’s true that he and aang are considering founding a city that unites the nations. zuko tells him it is.

“well, i want in. whenever that is,” he says, and jet and zuko hug.

song and her mother open up a hospital and sanctuary that specifically caters to displaced families. jet reunites with longshot and smellerbee, and they drift around but tend to come back to the sanctuary. they often go out on missions to try and reunite families. it’s not quite fighting, and it’s not quite peace, so it’s a good transition for jet and his freedom fighters.

eventually, things slow down and so does jet. he starts walking around the village they’re located in without his weapons. a child asks song where she got the scars on her leg, and when she explains it was a firebender, the child says “oh, did he get in trouble?” song laughs and laughs, because for the first time in years, there are children who don’t know war.

jin doesn’t stay as a kyoshi warrior forever, but she does decide to settle down on kyoshi. she never really wanted the dangerous life, she just wanted some adventure and sort of stumbled into the chaos of jet and song and zuko. the quiet island is perfect for her. she still stirs up trouble once in a while though.

“COME GET YOUR IDIOT SHE TRIED TO RIDE THE UNAGI.” suki writes in two identical letters, one to jet and song and one to zuko.

“okay, whatever suki tells you, i want you to know she’s lying. i DID ride the unagi and it was SICK. sokka was here recently and said someone invented an image-capture thing is that true? because if it is i want you to bring one and come here ASAP so i can do it AGAIN.” says the fervent letter from jin that arrived three days after suki’s.

jet and song arrive promptly, song laden with medical supplies and a sternly-worded letter from her mother to jin. jet brings a camera.

zuko shows up a few days later with the latest in camera technology and a photographer, as well as his one-year-old daughter. he goes all-out because this is his and izumi’s first trip together. jet grumbles about being one-upped.

“you’re the firelord, you’re gonna encourage this?” song asks him, eyes furious but voice sweet as she plays with izumi. “excuse me, song, but the war is over, i have no jurisdiction here. if an earth kingdom citizen wants to exercise her right to be a dumbass she’s more than welcome to,” says zuko in his most diplomatic voice.

“and,” he adds more gently, “i missed you guys.” song still thinks he’s being ridiculous, but she gives him a big hug anyway.

zuko has to firebend at the unagi to stop it from eating jin and song is left to mend jin’s broken arm. jet takes pictures throughout the entire thing, from her climbing onto the creature, to getting thrown, to being bandaged up and laughs the whole time. song produces a second letter written by her mother which she was instructed only to give to jin in the event she rode the unagi.

all it says in neat hand-writing is, “i told you so. now come home so i can feed you, you ridiculous child.”

“i’m 24,” pouts jin, but since she’s the youngest, the group agrees heartily with song’s mother.

the five of them go to the sanctuary, where iroh is drinking tea with song’s mother and trading stories about their new respective lives.

zuko has to return to the capital in three days, iroh’s got his tea shop to run, and jin isn’t planning on staying long because her “super hot girlfriend is doing something extremely sexy” and she has to get back soon.

“jin, please, just talk normal for once in your life,” zuko begs her, bouncing izumi on his lap. “fine,” she says, “she’s being voted in as the leader of the island and i want to be there for the ceremony.”

jet realizes it’s not often he’ll have all the people he loves in one place, and quietly asks song something important.

they get married the night before zuko and jin leave, in front of jet’s freedom fighters and song’s mother and iroh. jin and zuko stand as their maid of honor and best man. zuko cries.

for the first time in almost two decades, all of them start to feel at peace.

ty so much for this au @azenkii writing about it is one of the most enjoyable experiences haha. is this update softer than usual? yes, of course, it’s what they deserve.

1  2  3  4  5  6  7  masterpost

[seungminotes]

Accident - Prone

enemies to lovers/ almost-lovers with Hwang Hyunjin

A/N: this took so long and I don’t think I’m even happy with the result. I hope you like it though, anon

Warnings: 1.5 k words | kinda slow | potential part two? | not proofread

Hyunjin is literally the worst luck charm ever. Everywhere he goes is just a natural disaster around you. 

No matter what, always end up getting physically hurt. 

Whether it was a flying soccer ball to your nose, that awful chemical burn in chem after you two were partnered together once, the spilled water on your favorite blouse... the list goes on and on. 

After so many unlucky occurrences, you had finally decided Hyunjin was just the equivalent of seeing a black cat

A warning sign of impending doom. 

Okay but, perhaps he was just dramatic and clumsy

 the thought never really occurred to you that this boy was just made like that. 

You only figured: you plus him in a room together was not the best of ideas. It just could never end well.

 You swore you two could’ve been mortal enemies in a past life or something. 

These occurrences had just become so frequent that at one point, you naturally despised the lanky boy. 

Though quite unreasonable of you, you simply wanted nothing to do with him. 

Hyunjin on the other hand, had no ill feelings towards you. 

No, those ill feelings were rather reserved for himself whenever he somehow managed to ruin your day over and over again.

 He partially blamed his lack of coordination, but then he remembers he’s a dancer and had rather impressive coordination in comparison to most other people. 

Maybe that was saved for dancing though, maybe somehow those skills dissipated offstage and outside the practice room.

Orrrrr just maybe... it was just around you that he became so flustered, the human embodiment of a hot mess, that he could not function or even move accordingly? 

Whatever it was, he felt utterly sorry for every encounter you’d ever had with him. 

At some point he had tried to very actively avoid you in hopes of sparing himself the embarrassment of yet another disaster. 

He always made sure he and his friend group were situated as far as possible from you in the cafeteria during lunch.  

If he saw you walking down a hallway, he’d always be sure to turn the other direction. 

Heck he’d run into you only a certain amount of times before he had memorized your routes and just avoided those altogether. 

He very secretly cared for your own safety… from himself.

Which wasn’t the most romantic of things 

Which was reasonable, right? 

You could probably never have a romantic connection with someone with which nothing could ever go right. 

But why did that notion disappoint him so much??? hmmm

Hyunjin probably shouldn’t want to get any closer to you, that’s exactly why he drew an imaginary boundary 

And his plan proved to be more than effective with time. 

That at least it was…

Until Kim Seungmin, his own very best friend, decided to befriend you after a photography project you’d both worked on. 

Ever since then, you two had been practically inseparable…

 leading many to believe in a  prospective couple. Oop

Hyunjin typically just annoyed the thoughts of other surrounding the topic of you and Seungmin though, not that it bothered him per say

Anywayyyy 

Seungmin now sat with you on the other side of the cafeteria. 

Even after his long protest for you to go sit with his other friends, you couldn’t quite bring yourself to be in harm's way that close to Hyunjin.

“They’re not mean or anything, y/n,” 

“I didn’t say they are, I just don’t know them that well, it would be awkward,”

“Well how  can you get to know them if you won’t even sit near them,”

Okay so maybe at this point your feeling a bit guilty towards Minnie who is sacrificing some time with his best friends to sit with you now 

But as you glance towards his group of friends on the other side of the room, you couldn't help but get nerves from the sight of Hwang Hyunjin

Seungmin notices the change in demeanor in your face after you take a peek over there 

He thinks he;s just uncovered the mystery of the century 

“I saw that!”

“Saw what?”

“That passive aggressive glare you just shot my friends, which one do you hate?

“Seungggg, it’s nothing,”

“I bet it’s Jisung, he’s so loud, not really your type”

“I think Jisung is nice, drop it.”

“Hyunjin?”

The very mention of his name makes your face drop

Seungmin of course catches it 

“Knew it” 

So this leads to a very detailed retelling of every horrible occurrence that has happened to you in the presence of his friend

“You’re being stupid, he just has butter fingers” 

“You must have a butter body to mess up that much”

“Never say that phrase again, I didn’t like the mental image”

“Oh shut up”

Luckily the bell rang just in time to bring the convo to a close 

but as you both get up to throw your trays away Seungmin ultimately gets the last word

“You're sitting with us tomorrow”

You may or may not have pouted all the way to English with him afterwards 

Nothing really works on Seungmin though

Snake

So the next day, you’re sitting at lunch with all these guys you don’t know very well

But Min makes sure to introduce you well and they’re all super inclusive of you 

He even made sure you and Hyunjin sat on opposite ends of the table

Not that it even mattered though because Hyunjin was unusually quiet 

He really didn’t even look at you … 

Which didn’t bother you that much

Though it did make the atmosphere a bit tense when he was spoken to and wouldn’t really listen

He seemed super out of it

At least until he completely knocked over his carton of milk onto Felix’s tray

He cursed under his breath, because trust me he knew something would happen in the time span of half an hour that you were sitting this near him

Your breath hitched for a second because you were lowkey scared something was gonna happen soon

One of his natural disasters

But oddly enough, nothing really came towards you

Hyunjin got up to go scavenge for some napkins 

And lunch was soon nearing its end 

Meaning, you had spent a full 30 minutes near Hwang Hyunjin and remained unscathed 

Who would have thought?

Seungmin, that’s who 

He made it very clear too

His little “told you so” as you were getting up to throw your trash away

Unfortunately for you though, the nearest trash can appeared to be directly behind Hyunjin

Who by now was trying to clean up the mess of milk he made on the table

Considerate guy huh

“Y/n, hurry up we’re gonna be late” Seungmin urged 

What could go wrong if you just ….

Walk behind Hyunjin for like 3 seconds??

A lot more than you’d expect to be honest

In those mere three seconds Hyunjin has managed to turn around, trip you, and hit you on the side of the head with his outstretched arm clutching wet napkins

Cue Seungmin cracking up

And mortified Hyunjin

“Are you ok? Shoot I didn’t see you, are you good?

Your head lowkey panged but his worry was kind of unexpected …

And kinda maybe very adorable???

Uh oh

You get up and assure him you’re just fine

He kinda just scratches the back of his neck awkwardly

“I think I hurt you a little too often.”

“I’ve noticed,”

“I swear it’s not intentional or anything though”

Seungmin can’t take this atmosphere, he dips quick

He also can’t afford a tardy which you are obviously gonna get if you keep standing there staring up at this guy

You of course take notice that this awkward moment is taking a bit too long 

But something is really keeping you glued to this spot and it may or may not have to do with the warm worried eyes staring down at you

“I think Seungmin left you,” Hyunjin nods his head to where your friend was previously waiting for you 

“Little snake”

The little sound that Hyunjin made trying not to laugh kinda made you giggle

And oh no 

Hyunjin found that way too cute for his own good 

He decides to walk you to English, he knew the route pretty well, go figure

He does keep his distance though

After he drops you off at the door, you’re already late and so is he of course

But he waits for you to go in before sprinting to his own class

Almost like walking you home after a date 

When you excuse yourself into class, Seungmin is smirking at you from your shared desk 

“And I thought you hated Hyunjin.”

A roll of your eyes didn’t make him any less smug though.

[magnolia-penn]

Future Vision Chapter 2

DIO? God?

Oop- sorry this took so long. It took me forever to write and I had no motivation to type it all from my notebook.

Also, brownie points to whoever finds the Avatar: The Last Airbender reference.

Warnings: Swearing (so much swearing), Spoilers (sorta), mention of death (no one important) lemme know if I missed anything

□■□■□■□■□■□■□■□■□■□■□■□■

"31 years!" Polnareff shouted in disbelief.

"Apparently." You shrugged, already over it.

The men were flabbergasted about your current predicament. Stands were a fairly new concept and to think that there was a Stand strong enough to pull you from the future, breaking all sorts of time and space laws? You'd have to be crazy!

Yet… There you were, completely adapted to the strange situation. You were thrown almost double the amount of years you existed and all it took was a quick scream session behind a sand dune for you to calm down? 

"You seem so startled. Stands have crazy abilities. My friend, Magnolia, works alongside a mafia boss with the ability to create infinite life and make it so you can never truly reach death!" You pumped your fist in the air in excitement. "Time travel doesn't seem that far out. My Stand isn't too terribly special, especially compared to some of the other Stands I've seen, but it's pretty cool."

The group's confusion settled deeper as you went on a tangent about future Stands that your friend has described from her time working at the Speedwagon Foundation. You used words that didn't make sense, phrases they didn't understand, but your growing excitement caused them to nod along with you.

"OH! And Stands can be upgraded! Although we do-" You cut yourself off suddenly, eyes zoned out.

You didn't say anything, just stared into the endless expanse of sand and heat. It was Kakyoin who spoke up first.

"Y/n? Are you alright?"

You snapped out of your trance with a start. "I FORGOT TO FEED MY FISH SHIT SEND ME BACK!"

Your sudden outburst sent Polnareff jumping back into Mr. Joestar, your attention dragged to him as his face dropped from confusion to somber defeat.

You picked up on the nervous weight shifts and glances away. You tried to look back at the man who brought you here, only for Mr. Joestar to clear his throat, bringing the attention back to him. He fumbled with his words a bit, trying to justify the shift in attention, but he ultimately failed.

"Oh ho no, I see what's going on," You said after Mr. Joestar gave up on trying to explain. "This fuck-" a pointed finger towards the corpse behind you, "was my only ticket back to the future?"

"Well no. Technic-" You cut the older man off.

"'Uh well no'," you mocked. "Lemme guess, he would've been the easiest way?"

"Now, Miss Y/n, there is no need to be so aggressive. I'm sure we can figure everything out. Our enemy, DIO, has a lackey-" 

You cut Avdol off as well.

"DIO? God? In Italian? What kind of narcissist names their kid 'God' in Italian?"

You gave a snort before falling into a fit of mocking laughter. Your humor was short lived, though, as Jotaro finally spoke up. Or shouted I guess.

"Can you shut up? Good grief, all you do is yap! God, all you women are the same."

You stopped your laughter to stare at the teen clad in black, sizing him up. It was a tense couple of minutes, an unstoppable force and an unmovable object locked in a stubborn standoff.

After a bit, you let out a chuckle and let your head fall back to face the sky.  You watched the clouds for a second before sighing.

"You know, Joots," You catch him visibly tense from the nickname. "I see why you become a marine biologist in the future. The ocean is powerful and terrifying. It's been like that from the beginning. My friend often describes me like the ocean, although, unlike the tides, who have decided to kill you millions of years ago," You bring your hand up near your face before clenching it into a fist, shimmering from the effects of your Stand. "I still haven't made up my mind."

Jotaro's face turns sour in fear for a split second before returning to the default steely glare. You watched in amusement as his Stand began to manifest, but the hesitation you saw in the purple being's eyes told you all you needed to know.

Jotaro was, at the very least, cautious of you.

But also curious.

You managed to make full contact with Hierophant Green, something no one can do unless a Stand is initiating the contact. Kakyoin also couldn't see you, so how could it've climbed up you? Stand don't act on their own violations.

You also mentioned the future Jotaro. He becomes a marine biologist? And one famous enough to be known by teenagers? Jotaro can't even name a famous marine biologist.

He figured killing you know would be disastrous, there was still much to learn from you. Maybe you held knowledge that once came with hindsight.

"Nice to see we're in agreement." Jotaro gruffed out, allowing Star Platinum to fully dissipate.

A small smile graced your features as you extended the same hand you threatened him with.

"Well then, a truce. Until we decide to kill each other." 

Jotaro nodded and took your hand, allowing a handshake to secure your mortalities.

For now.

"MON DIEU! I THOUGHT SHE WAS DEAD!" Polnareff wailed suddenly, startling the group.

Tension rolled off all of you as Avdol let out a sigh of relief. "I am quite surprised you are alive as well. Not many people can insult Jotaro and walk away intact, Y/n."

You chuckled and waved off the man's concern. "I may only have six brain cells, but I'm not stupid. He wouldn't do shit. Not without knowing what I can do."

"Is that so?" Jotaro let a small smirk slip out. It's hard not to grin when you were acting stupid.

You nodded and hummed in agreement. "I like to think I'm good at reading people."

Jotaro only scoffed and rolled his eyes, although there was an inset glimmer of amusement deep with those cerulean orbs.

"So what exactly does your Stand do?" Mr. Joestar asked the elephant in the room.

"Hmm? Oh, my Stand. Okay, so, here's the thing. My Stand is actually really weak." You confessed.

"My Stand, Chemical Romance, is only really good for getting info from people. I'm often called in to the Speedwagon Foundation to help with interrogations. My Stand allows me to talk to and understand other Stands. All those unintelligible noises your Stand makes are actually your soul trying to communicate, and Chem translates them for me. Even silent Stands or Stands with no humanoid form." You glanced at Mr. Joestar. "I can also touch and interact with them, like I did for Hierophant Green. Also, and we think this might just be a radius effect, but Stands become more sentient around me. They think for themselves."

And….. just like that you lost them. It's hard to understand  such complex Stands when all they know is Many Punch, Tasteful Nudes, French Sword, Fire Bird, and Shiny Rock.

"So… You can't actually follow through with your previous threats?" Kakyoin asked cautiously.

"Excuse you! Just who in the hell do you think you are? I am a whole ass person shaped can of whoop ass and no weak ass Stand or Death Parade wannabe looking ass is going to beat me!" You pumped your fist in the air again.

"Whew- That's the sort of can-do attitude our team needs." Mr. Joestar chuckled. "Wait, that wouldn't be a bad idea!"

"Oh ho? Does the great Joseph Joestar have an idea? Careful, Old Man, thinking can hurt ya." You joked.

"No no no no no hear me out. You need to get back to the future, we need to stop DIO from murdering everybody and taking over the world." Mr. Joestar explained. "We both have to get to Cairo for DIO! Join us! You and your Stand are really useful!"

Surprise crossed your face before slipping back to its usual cool façade.

"Nah, I was kind of digging the idea of shriveling up dead in the desert. Although~" you drawled. "I guess, if you're so desperate for my help. It would be immoral for me not to help you, you're so old, even thinking about fighting DIO is going to trigger a heart attack."

You snorted out a laugh and Mr. Joestar did chuckle a bit before you realized something.

"Sooo. Who exactly DIO? Other than some bitch who wants to take over the world." 

As quickly as a light flicking out of existence, the once humorous and airy atmosphere of the group became tense and tragic. The utter rage, disgust, and hatred for this mysterious man was palpable. Even the fun and boisterous Jean-Pierre Polnareff extruded murderous intent.

"DIO is a very bad man." Avdol broke the silence, but found himself unable to say more.

"Thanks for the life lesson, Dad," you spit sarcastically. "No. Who is he and what might he have done to sound so familiar."

"DIO is a monster that was created by greed and a lust for power. He is a vampire who ruthlessly slaughtered those who took him in when he was orphaned at the age of twelve." Mr. Joestar explained grimly. "He rejected his humanity to become something monstrous and immortal, but even now, that wasn't enough for him."

"He's notorious throughout the Speedwagon Foundation, whose founder fought him a hundred years ago. I wouldn't doubt it if his story still circulated in your years, Y/n." Avdol completed.

"All of us are here now because of DIO. Polnareff and I were under his control because of a flesh bud, Advol was almost conned into the same situation, and Jotaro's mother, Joseph's daughter, is under attack by her own Stand because it was forcibly awoken by him." Kakyoin said, then shot you a soft smile. "And I guess you as well."

"Oh yeah! Eli did mention they were looking for a girl who could strengthen DIO's Stand, so I guess he is why you're here!" Polnareff's smile returned to his face at the prospect of making a new friend who was in the same boat as them.

"Y'know, think back on it, I do vaguely remember my friend mentioning your mom, Joots." That damned nickname again. "Stand Sickness is what we call it now. That might be where I know DIO from." You shrugged like it wasn't a big deal. "Anywho, now that that's settled, can we get out of the desert? I'm roasting to death."

"Oh! Of course! We have to get to the next town before nightfall anyways. To the car!" Mr. Joestar cheered.

You all piled into the three rowed vehicle. Jotaro and Polnareff sat in the way back, you and Kakyoin sat in the middle, with Mr. Joestar and Avdol occupying the front.

The road to the next town was filled with fill ins. They explained how they came together and how they defeated their foes that found them at every turn. You spoke of how the world has changed and advanced. You showed them your music and all the apps on your phone. You found that you were still connected to your home wifi at full strength, but you couldn't comment or post anything. All true contact to those in the future was cut off, but you could still consume media.

As the dust and corpse was left behind, you could feel the newly forged bonds between you and the men around you strengthen and grow, becoming more entangled and intertwined. And you felt happy about it.

[x--daughters-of-darkness--x]

I TALKED TO AMY LEE OF EVANESCENCE ABOUT INSPIRING THE WORLD’S WORST FANFICTION

The singer of My Immortal (the song) has now read My Immortal (the fanfic)

If you mention the name “My Immortal,” you may mean one of two things. The first is the 2003 hit song from rock band Evanescence. The second is a Harry Potter fanfic so transcendentally, mysteriously bad that it’s transfixed the internet for years.

The fanfic My Immortal is about a time-traveling mall-goth teenage vampire wizard (named “Ebony Dark’ness Dementia Raven Way”) who is obsessed with Evanescence and a variety of goth-inflected rock bands. She’s supposed to look like Amy Lee, Evanescence’s lead vocalist, pianist, and songwriter. And to this day, nobody is sure who wrote the story or whether they were serious.

Back in the real world, Lee and the rest of Evanescence have spent months under stay-at-home orders during the coronavirus pandemic. They’ve used that time to film two music videos in collaboration with director P.R. Brown, each shot by band members and their families. The latest is a surreal video for “The Game Is Over,” a song from their upcoming album The Bitter Truth. In Lee’s words, it’s shot as a “psychological thriller,” full of imagery based on a specific fear or inner demon from each member.

These videos — filmed in living rooms, cars, and other personal spaces — give fans a new kind of look into the band members’ lives. But I was curious about a different kind of fan relationship: did the creators of “My Immortal” know about My Immortal? I spoke to Lee, and the answer is yes; in fact, it’s part of a long-running family joke. She’d never actually read it, however, until last week.

You’ve made two videos under quarantine, and they’ve taken very different approaches. What was the process behind each of them?

We really had to just think kind of quickly. We were working on another video treatment that would have been full-production, this whole deal with a big crew and things we could no longer have because of the pandemic — including the fact that we couldn’t even physically get together because we live all over the world.

We recognized that “Wasted on You” had a bunch of lyrical content that felt like all of a sudden where we were. So we went for that. I really wanted it to be real on a level like people hadn’t seen us before: in our own homes, in our real lives, not dressed up, not in makeup, just the real, raw us.

For the second one, it’s like “Okay, how do we take what we’ve learned and amp it up even more to make it look like a real video more than just us being ourselves?” We have all been very serious about the lockdown, so we have been completely alone for the most part during this time — and that is cool in some ways as a creator. But you really have to live with yourself all the time.

A few of us have gone through some difficult things in the past few years. [Bassist Tim McCord] and I both experienced losses in our immediate family. There’s just been a lot of hard. So you know when you’re finally forced to stop being distracted by all the things that keep us happy, there’s silence — and that stuff comes out. So each of us had a private kind of gut-spilling confession with [P.R. Brown] about what we’re struggling with.

We were just sharing deeply in a way that we don’t normally go all the way with when it comes to at least our visuals. When I pour my lyrics into my music, it’s always really raw. But in this, it’s like, we’re not going to hold back on the video side and just make it beautiful — we’re going to go for it and let it be ugly and share the dark parts of ourselves.

I think of a lot of your music as being open and vulnerable, and you interact with fans online. What does filming a video at home like this communicate that your normal social media presence and music don’t?

I hope it just shows more and more of that willingness to be vulnerable because as hard as it is, it always leaves me feeling more satisfied than just putting on a pretty face.

Social media’s such a weird world for me. I love it — I’m grateful for the idea that we can have a direct relationship with our fans. But it’s kind of a double-edged sword. It’s such an open platform for everybody to criticize everything about you. And when you go there, you’re going to see that. I think that’s true for everybody. It doesn’t matter if you’re a celebrity or not. It’s just a place where people don’t have to show their face to say things, and there’s a lot of ugly out there.

What’s your relationship specifically with fanworks? Do people send you things that were inspired by you?

Oh my god, it’s so wonderful. We’ve got so much art. I’ve got this huge collection of stuff that I’ve been hanging on to just from the beginning. There are so many talented people out there that pour their efforts into making a piece of visual art that is either of something in the Evanescence world or just something else that came out of them while they were listening to our music.

Then there are other things that you have to keep because they’re so hilariously funny. People will make a crazy poem that makes totally no sense but I’m a character within it, which is awesome. It’s like, I know this person’s like 12 years old and totally sincere, but this is so funny. I have a little studio, and I dedicated a little bit of time during our unexpected free time to cover it wall-to-wall in the bathroom with all the fan stuff.

Which brings me to my next question: had you ever heard of My Immortal?

I think for quite a while I was just unaware of it. And then my cynical, Reddit-loving younger sister who’s also an English teacher, somewhere during the holiday every year when the family’s all together, it’ll come up for some reason. And she’s like, “Wait — you still haven’t read My Immortal?” And I’m like, “No, what do you mean?” She’s like, “You have to. Okay, hold on. Let me read you an excerpt.” And then she’ll pull up her phone and read some awesome paragraph from the craziest, funniest thing ever that makes no sense.

It’s one of her favorite things that she thinks is the most hilarious thing in the world, and I still just kept not reading it. It’s been kind of this ongoing joke with us. And then I got a call a few days ago that you wanted to talk about it, so I was like, “Oh, crap. I have to read a little bit of it.”

I read I think not quite half of it, but it did have me in tears. I was laughing really, really hard at one point, just because of the nonsense. And then I started asking myself, is this real? I can’t quite tell. I’m totally undecided. Is it sincere? I feel like it started maybe as sincere, but they got in on it and started playing it up for the haters. I can’t tell! What do you think?

It would have to be so elaborate, but there are a bunch of cases that really make it seem like this person knows much, much more than the character they’re putting on.

I noticed a misspelling that was like, instead of triumphantly, it was “triumelephantly.” And I was like, come on, you don’t think “elephant” is inside “triumphant.” There’s no way.

At one point, the main character’s name is spelled two different ways within three words of each other.

I totally saw that, too! I’m torn because I want it to be sincere, kind of... but I don’t know.

There are things about it that aren’t cool to talk about. Like it’s not funny to talk about slitting your wrists. So it takes me a second to get past that joke, which is so recurring.

Yeah, if you go back to old internet culture, a lot of it is really ugly. And it’s weird trying to separate that stuff out.

Is it better now?

I don’t know because now I’m too old to know what’s going on. But kids do seem nicer. They often seem nicer.

I would like to believe we’ve grown up a little bit as a society from that. Maybe everybody having a little bit more of a microphone has taught us some things that we need to be aware of that are outside of our perception and our personal experiences. There are other people that are seeing that in a different way. I think it would be cool if that’s true.

I was a teenager around when My Immortal came out, and it feels like it describes a very recognizable “goths versus preps” rivalry. Did you feel that?

I think this thing is poking fun at that world — I mean it would have to be, come on — and that part of it really resonates with me in a real way. But I didn’t consider myself goth! Part of what’s weird and funny is like okay, this is describing hating the preps, and you’re the cool one, you’re the underground, you understand real life and the gravity of death, and I get it. But if you’re so depressed and everything’s so hard and you’re so real and they’re so fake, why do you put so much effort into your look?

That was what always turned me off about the word “goth” when that started being assigned to me in our early days. If I was 15 years old and you’d asked me what I was, I’m grunge. I buy all my clothes at garage sales, I don’t do crap to my look, I get ready two seconds before school, and all the preps are the ones who put all their focus on their looks and what party they’re going to go to.

But yeah, that part was funny to me. That part existed.

I love the idea of you knowing about this thing for years without having read it.

I kind of want to thank you because I did get a really good laugh out of it last night. It’s not like, when I have free time, I’m motivated to go read some horribly bad thing. But it’s actually pretty interesting.

And you’ve gotta love all the characters breaking into song to sing My Chemical Romance songs. It’s pretty great.

[sevsnapeoriginalfanfix]

Chapter 2: A Chemical Reaction

Tags: Severus x Hermione, Hermione as an adult/Professor, Enemies to Lovers, Fluff, Angst, Eventual Romance and Lemon

“Coffee?” he questioned, but it came out more like a demand. She cocked an eyebrow at him, but accompanied it with a soft smile. 

“That would be nice, thank you. Now, I was looking at the process for this...” As he made another cup of coffee, Hermione went through the instructions, asking an endless stream of questions. This, he knew, she had always done, much to his chagrin. Yet, today somehow he found it endearing. She truly was brilliant and he couldn’t deny that it was impressive- and rare- to find someone who could keep up with his intellectual abilities. For a brief moment as he looked across the table at Hermione reading and sipping coffee, he imagined a future life. Hermione was in pajamas from the night before and she sipped coffee as they discussed the newest article in Charms, Chasers, and Concoctions. Her smile was radiant as she excitedly went into detail about work of an up-and-coming alchemist. Severus kissed her on the forehead and she dreamily asked, “But should it really be stirred counter-clockwise 12 times?”

The daydream faded and Severus shook his head, realizing that Hermione’s question was in the present. 

“Yes, but do it rapidly,” he responded, a little aggressively. If he was annoyed, it was merely at himself for pondering a pipe dream.  An impossible- and until today, latent- pipe dream. 

“But it doesn’t say that,” she insisted. 

“You’re right. Forget years of Potions experience and the fact that I’ve made this and actually succeeded before. Let’s believe the directions that led you to fail this potion, how many times was it?” Although it was a typical Severus Snape response, Hermione could have sworn there was a mischievous twinkle in his eyes this time. She did as she was told, stirring the potion quickly instead of her usual careful pace. Only a few seconds later, the unfinished potion began to shimmer, just as it was supposed to. Severus put up his hands as if to say, “I told you so!” Hermione simply grinned. She knew he was right. Whether she like to admit it or not, he usually was...

Perhaps it was the coffee or the high of success, but as the pair continued working, Hermione began to shed her bossy exterior for a more fun-loving attitude. 

“Favorite food?” she quizzed. 

“Steak. Medium rare.” 

“You’re supposed to ask people the question back, you know. It’s called conversation,” she teased, gently elbowing his arm. 

“If you don’t watch it, I’m going to spill this potion and the only conversation we will have is if I cause you physical harm or merely kick you out.” The corners of his mouth turned up slightly into what resembled a smile.  “And your favorite food is?” 

“Raspberry tart, thank you!” “That’s not a food, that’s a dessert.” “Dessert is still a food, Severus!” The banter continued as the hours passed. At the completion of the sixth hour, they realized that neither had stopped to eat. As both were too tired to actually cook something, they moved to the couch and munched on an assortment of crisps and biscuits. 

“This is a very healthy diet you have here, Severus,” Hermione laughed. “However do you maintain your figure?” 

“I do think these buttons have gotten a little tighter as of late...” he confessed. 

“Okay, I just have to know. I’ve never seen you wear anything else. Do you have one outfit? Or is it the same and you just have several of them? Do you sleep in this?” 

“I couldn’t possibly tell you, it would give away my air of mystery,” said Severus with a wink. Severus moved his arm and mid-motion realized to his horror that he was instinctively putting his arm around Hermione’s shoulders. After a brief moment of panic, he extended his other arm back and pretended to stretch. He immediately put his arms back rigidly to his sides afterward and thought amusedly to himself how most men he knew would use that very move to achieve the opposite. Even he knew the old “stretch and yawn” trick was typically used to put an arm around a woman, not the other way around. 

What had made him do it? Was it her carefree laugh when he said something genuinely entertaining? Was it how she seemed to actually care about his interests and didn’t allow him to give his typical prudent, noncommittal answers? Certainly not, he reminded himself. It was the fact that they were making excellent, albeit slow, progress. It was the fact that he rarely enjoyed anyone’s company in the first place and he enjoyed intellectual conversation. It was the way her eyes pierced him and seem to know him even without using Occulumency. It was her sweet smile, the curve of her slender waist. The shapely way her thighs seemed to meld into her curvy hips and the swell of her breasts under that fitted, light blue sweater...

“Fuck,” he muttered aloud. The embarrassment he felt for accidentally swearing out loud was soon irrelevant as her saw Hermione’s eyes flicker to his lap, where his own body was betraying him by growing more erect by the second. Though her eyes quickly darted elsewhere, Severus knew she had seen. What will she think of me now? This morning, I was a curmudgeon that she resentfully asked for help. Now she thinks I’m a pervert. I much prefer the first...

A kiss on the cheek startled Severus from his spiraling thoughts. He turned to face her, as if to confirm that he hadn’t just imagined it. Hermione’s face was inches from his and as their lips began to draw closer, he cleared his throat and pulled away. 

“Well, we achieved what he needed to today. There is more to do, but we can work on that tomorrow. I’ll see you to the door.” He stood, thanking the gods that his surge of hormones had subsided. Hermione seemed undeterred and smiled as she stood in the doorframe. 

“I’ll be here tomorrow at 5pm. And I’ll bring wine.” 

[sanderssides-springfling]

The Frogman

For @space-mothman 

Synopsis- Analogical cryptid-hunting AU in which they search for the mysterious Frogman for a college documentary project.

Warning- Swearing + Minor wound

Note- Hiya!! I’ve had a lot of fun working with the wishes you asked for and I’m super excited to see what you think of it! I hope you’re doing well :D

.

.

.

Virgil held up the two near-identical hoodies in front of the mirror, deciding which to wear when a familiar head poked through the doorway. 

“Ooh, are you getting ready for your little date?” 

Virgil walked over to kick him out when Janus joined in. 

“Leave our darling little brother alone Remus, his boyfriend will be here soon. We have to find the baby pictures before he arrives.”

“He’s not my boyfriend! The teacher paired us up. I had no say in it.” Virgil said as he tried and failed to push the pair out. “And if either of you shows him any embarrassing pictures of me, you’re both dead.”

“Wow, how scary,” mocked Remus as Janus mimed a face of fear. He then added, “If I were you I’d go for the one on the left, it makes you look less…intimidating and murdery.”

Virgil swatted at him with the hoodie before putting it on reluctantly, huffing about how he was planning to choose it anyway because it was ‘warmer’.

Just then the doorbell rang. Virgil’s eyes opened wide as he ran down the stairs to get to the door first but he was no match for Remus. He shoved Virgil out of the way and opened the door wide. 

“You must be Logan. We’ve heard so much about you. Why don’t you come in?” He invited with a wild grin on his face.

Virgil stared daggers at Remus as Logan walked in, politely telling Remus he has a lovely home. He was wearing a jean jacket over an unbuttoned plaid shirt and a graphic t-shirt depicting Mothman. His soft-looking hair fell over the rim of his glasses, the eyes behind them taking in his new surroundings.

Before Virgil could tell Logan they should leave, Janus began his, rehearsed, warnings. “You better take good care of my brother, young man. I’m expecting you to bring him home with at least three remaining limbs and having gone through a maximum of one demon possession, preferably none, or else there will be hell to pay. I’m also expecting you to keep criminal activity to a minimum along with the use of venomous vipers, they’re nasty creatures.” 

To Virgil’s surprise, Logan had taken out a notepad and started to make notes, taking his speech seriously. Janus clearly wasn’t expecting this either as his expression softened towards Logan. “It’s obvious you’ll take good care of him. I’ll let you two go because I’m sure you have plenty of ‘work’ to do.” He winked at Virgil. “Just be careful.”

“But-”

“The baby photos and home videos can wait for their second date Rem, let’s give Virge a chance to embarrass himself without our help first.”

Virgil glared at his brothers as he dragged Logan outside, only mildly thankful Janus let him off that easy. What had he done to deserve being stuck with those two morons?

“Have fun!” Remus called out as the door slammed closed. 

“Come on, I parked down the road. It’s not far.” Logan set off walking away, Virgil joining him a moment later.

“I’m super sorry about them,” Virgil said. “Ignore everything they said, they’re not worth wasting energy on.”

“It’s quite alright Virgil, it’s clear they care for you. I have always admired the dynamic between siblings.”

“You’re an only child? Lucky.” He thought back to how embarrassing his brothers were. They took every opportunity available to tease Virgil, regardless of whether they were alone or with any of his few friends. In moments like that, it was hard to remember why he loved them. He reminded himself, trying to calm down.

On his worst nights, Remus would tell him a gruesome ‘bedtime story’ while Deceit badgered him to add a happy end. They would also take him to concerts of bands he liked and try to fit into the scene even though they hated the music and fashion. Seeing Janus in a My Chemical Romance shirt trying not to curse after jabbing himself in the eye with Virgil’s eyeliner was still one of his fondest memories.

“Although,” Virgil added, “It does have its advantages.”

Logan stopped in front of an old pickup truck. Despite the carefully polished hubcaps and fresh paint job, it had visibly been through a lot.

“Here we are, our ride for the evening.” Logan took hold of the passenger door handle. “The door can be a little tricky sometimes.” He rattled the handle, banging at a spot a few inches below it. The door sprang open. “Like to most things, there’s a trick.”

He pulled the door open fully, holding it for Virgil as he clambered up. “Uh…thanks.”

Logan proceeded to join him from the driver’s side. “It may not look it but it’s a strong and reliable vehicle, I spent all last summer fixing it up.” He said proudly.

“No, no, it’s nice!” Virgil reassured him. “Does it have a name?” 

“Why would my truck have a name?” Logan asked, appearing puzzled. He put his key in the ignition. The vehicle whirred to life.

“Nevermind. Are you excited to film our project?” 

“Incredibly so! When Mr Picani said we had to make a documentary on any subject I got super excited about the idea of cryptid hunting! Thank you for going along with it!”

“Whatever gets me to pass the class dude. Plus this seems like a better way to spend time than filming ladybugs walking on leaves and doing some boring commentary.” What Virgil didn’t add was that after seeing the excitement of Logan’s face when he proposed the idea, Virgil couldn’t find it in his heart to say no. 

He shuffled in his seat. “I’m also really happy I got partnered with you. I know we haven’t talked much but you seem a lot easier to get along with than the other people in our class.” Virgil smiled in Logan’s direction and despite the dim lighting, he could have sworn he saw Logan blush.

“Oh, thank you, Virgil. You too have ‘good vibes’ if I’m using the term correctly.” Virgil grinned, telling Logan he did. 

“How about some music?” Logan asked before turning on the radio. Pop music crackled out of it, gently playing for the rest of their journey.

~~~~

A cold wind blew through the dense, gloomy woods. In the clearing before it, stood a teenager speaking to a camera, visible in the dying light of the sun.

“There are many legends about the Sanders Wilds, however, most revolve around the same being. A creature said to lurk in the depths of these woods, waiting for unsuspecting victims. 

He has been described as a slimy beast with incredible jumping abilities, his hind muscular legs able to propel him forward metres at a time. He most often appears by the many bodies of water found in this forest.

Although no-one has ever disappeared in the woods, most locals swear they’ve met one of the unfortunate souls chased by the being whose very existence is in question.

He goes by many names. The Shadow, the Beast of the Sanders Wilds and recently he’s been referred to as ‘Scary Todd’ by a youngster from a neighbouring Elementary school.”

Virgil raised his eyebrows from behind the camera when he heard ‘youngster’ but Logan brushed it off and continued.

“The most common name of the cryptid we will be investigating today, inspired by its many characteristics, is” Logan stopped for dramatic effect. “The Frogman.“

“That’s quite the speech you prepared there” Virgil called out as he put down the video camera and rubbed his forearm. His arms had begun to stiffen during Logan’s monologue 

“Are you ready to go in?” Logan asked.

Virgil froze. There was only one problem, something he hadn’t told Logan- He was scared. 

Virgil knew that technically there wasn’t anything to be scared of. The frogman was nothing more than an urban legend, mere shadows and reflections mistaken for something, however, it was the what if’s that plagued Virgil’s mind. What if the frogman was real? What if he appeared? Worst of all… what if he caught them? Virgil wasn’t sure if he was willing to risk his life to pass a college class he didn’t even like that much.

“Virgil?” Logan looked concerned. “Are you alright?”

Great, Virgil scolded himself. This was exactly why he hadn’t wanted to tell Logan in the first place. More than anything he didn’t want Logan to think he was a nervous wreck, scared of a fake monster. Now he’d have to tell his handsome partner he was a chicken and he would totally think less of Virgil. Oh why does Logan have to be so handsome, Virgil thought to himself as he looked towards his cryptid hunting companion. 

He was tall, with a sturdy frame that was perfect for giving supportive hugs and his hair was unruly in all the right ways, looking good for running your fingers through. It was very difficult to focus on anything else, Virgil had to admit. Good looking people never failed to make things more difficult.

“I- I’m just… a little scared.” Virgil mumbled reluctantly. “As controversial as it is, I’m not too keen on the whole getting captured by a forest monster thing.”

“Oh.” Logan looked disappointed. “Don’t worry about it, it’s not too late to change the project. I can drive us to the library and we can get started in something different. All that matters is that you feel comfortable.”

Virgil felt touched. Logan was willing to give up something he wanted to do for his well being? It wasn’t often that happened. That’s why he was determined to go in anyway. “No way. We’re going in there and finding that frogman. Just… promise to protect me from any monsters?” Virgil managed a smile as he held out his pinky, holding the camcorder in his other hand.

“Pinky promise,” Logan answered solemnly, hooking his finger around Virgil’s. Then, he smiled wide. “Now, let’s go say hi to The Beast. And…” He paused apprehensively as if he was trying to pick out the right words. “If you’re alright carrying the camcorder with one hand, maybe I could hold your hand? So you feel safe?”

Virgil laughed, slipping his hand into Logan’s. It felt warm compared to the cool evening. “As long as you’re okay with shaky footage.” He joked.

Logan led them into the forest, pulling out a flashlight from his pocket while Virgil switched the camera back on. There was an eerie quiet only broken by the crackling of leaves and snapping of branches under their feet. 

“Hey, Logan, you know you can talk, right? We can edit everything out of the footage later.” There was still no response. 

Virgil glanced towards Logan, seeing him staring intensely at a spot in the direction they were walking. “Make sure you get this.” He murmured before rushing up, tugging Virgil with him. He crouched down next to an animal print in the muddy ground. Virgil let go of his hand so he could step back and get a better angle. 

“This right here is an animal footprint however it belongs to no regular being. While it seems to belong to an amphibian creature as is indicated by the pattern and the indentation from webbing, it is bigger than any regular amphibians could produce.” Logan splayed his hand above the mark to demonstrate. They were around the same size. “This must be the footprint of the Frogman.”

Yay, Virgil thought to himself. Evidence of a creature that might kill them. How wonderful. 

He walked to Logan and helped him up, keeping hold of Logan’s hand afterwards because there was no way he was going to risk getting separated from him now. He also enjoyed the feeling of Logan’s hand in his, it made him a feeling of joy that he couldn’t quite place.

They continued when there was a sudden rustling a few metres in front of them. Instinctively Virgil squeezed Logan’s hand harder, holding onto him for safety. They both froze. Logan’s torch turned to the source of the sound, a bush. A moment later a squirrel scampered out of the said bush, disappearing into the darkness as quickly as it appeared. Both Logan and Virgil sighed in relief.

“That sure was one terrifying squirrel,” Virgil said as they continued to walk deeper into the woods. 

Virgil attempted to strike up small talk again, not wanting things to become awkward. “I like your Mothman shirt.”

“Oh, thank you, Virgil.” Logan beamed, the way he only did when he was speaking about something he was passionate about. “I had a really big cryptid phase as a child, so big my parents decided to take us to Point Pleasant for the summer break one year. That’s the hometown of Mothman, they have a statue of him and everything. It was incredible. That’s when I got the shirt! It’s been a good luck charm. Not that I believe in luck but it never hurts something else on your side”

“You got it as a kid and it still fits? You must’ve been a tall kid.”

“It was the middle of their tourist season so they were sold out of all the youth sizes. According to my mother, it made a very fashionable dress.”

Virgil held back giggles as the thought of a smaller Logan wearing that shirt going down to his knees with a pair of fashionable red heels crossed his mind. For whatever reason, if Logan were to wear a dress, Virgil believed he’d wear it with stunning red heels. He seemed the type.

“Did you spot The Mothman?” he asked, only half kidding.

“Unfortunately not, although it was probably for the best as I was going to ask him for an autograph. I doubt that would have gone down well with Him.“

The idea of a smaller Logan wearing an oversized Mothman merchandise shirt going down to his knees and a pair of fashionable red heels walking up to the Lord of the Shadows himself, at least double his height, and asking him to sign his autograph book was so funny to Virgil that he stopped in his tracks wheezing, his eyes brimming with tears. 

Seeing Logan’s bewildered expression, he tried to calm himself. After a few moments catching his breath trying to keep a straight he was able to regain his composure. “Sorry Lo, I’m fine now.”

“Can I ask-”

“No” Virgil interrupted him. “It’s really for the best you don’t.”

“Alright Virgil, I’ll trust you on this one.” He hummed a song Virgil wasn’t familiar with for a few moments. Then, he said, “I had an idea for while we’re either walking towards the Frogman or further into the depth of woods we might get lost in.” Virgil wasn’t sure if Logan was kidding and frankly he didn’t want to know. 

“Yeah L, what is it?” Virgil’s mind started to race when he realized he had called Logan a nickname. While only a shortening of his name, it still seemed very personal and friendly. What if it bothers him? What if he thinks it’s weird? 

“Well Vee,” Logan paused to see Virgil’s reaction, looking smug. Virgil stuck his tongue out at him. He wouldn’t admit it but his heart would flutter whenever he got that self-righteous expression on his face, seen often when he corrected the teacher or had got full marks on a test. It was cute. Very annoying, but cute.

“We could directly target your fear of the Frogman. You would have to trust me though.”

“I trust you,” Virgil answered with no hesitation. He squeezed Logan’s hand in his.

“Oh…um…” Logan appeared flustered. “This is going to seem scary but there’s a very low possibility of a negative outcome. Now…repeat after me.”

Logan took a deep breath before yelling “Fuck you Frogman!”

Virgil startled, not expected Logan to be so brazen. Yelling was a common occurrence for Logan however such vulgarities? Directed at a possibly supernatural creature who was reported as dangerous? He shook his head in disbelief.

Logan looked at him pointedly. “Oh no Logan, there is no way-” He stopped realizing there would be no convincing Logan. “Fine.” He grumbled.

“Frick you Frogman.” The words sounded uncertain. 

“That was a good first attempt, Virgil. If you want to try again, you should really try to metaphorically shake off any inhibitions and really go for it. I did promise to protect you, the Frogman won’t hurt you.”

“Are you sure?”

“Absolutely.”

They had come to a stop next to a running stream of water. Virgil slipped his camcorder into his hoodie pocket and let go of Logan’s hand, freeing both his arms. After running his fingers through his hair trying to build up enough confidence and jumping where he stood for a moment getting into an energetic mood, he felt ready. Or as ready as he could be. 

Angling his head to the sky he screamed at the top of his lungs “Fuck you Frogman!”

He laughed in exhilaration, adrenaline running through his veins. Virgil felt invincible. “And fuck your Frogmother too!” He raised his hand for a high five.

“Yes!” Logan exclaimed. As he stepped towards Virgil, he must have been too excited to look where he walked because his foot caught on a tree branch. 

Instinctively Virgil went to grab Logan’s hand to keep him up, however, Virgil started hurtling towards the creek as well, knocked off balance. He gasped as he hit the cold water, a moment later crashing into Logan.

The stream had been quite shallow, a foot deep at most. Virgil, quite luckily, didn’t experience the brute of the fall, having fallen on top of Logan. He rolled off and tried to stand. He would definitely have a couple nasty bruises later, he thought to himself. 

“Hey Lo, are you okay?” Virgil looked for the torch that fell out of Logan’s hand during his fall. It wasn’t far and within seconds he was shining it directly at Logan’s face. Logan didn’t appreciate it.

“I’m fine, I assure you but please get that out of my face. The light is blinding.” Virgil muttered a few apologies while helping Logan to his feet. Overall, whilst cold and mildly pained, Logan appeared to be okay overall.

The two were both standing up in the middle of the creek. Although their feet were still submerged in the freezing cold water neither seemed to notice nor care. Instead, they were both looking directly at each other. 

They inched closer and Logan began softly “Virgil, I’ve been meaning to tell you-” however he didn’t get to finish that sentence.

There was a raucous splashing sound from further upstream. Then there was another, this time louder. Whatever was making the noise was approaching. 

Virgil shared a look of terror with Logan. He grabbed the camera and started recording as a shadowy figure started to form. Its form was unclear, however, it moved forward the way a frog might, leaping up and forward. Virgil was sure, it was The Frogman. 

“What are you waiting for, Vee? Run.” Logan urged him to come however Virgil was frozen in fear. This was the end for him. He’d never see Janus and Remus again. He’d never tell Logan how he feels. 

Logan snatched the torch from Virgil and took his now-free hand into his. Glancing back to the shadowy figure a final time, he muttered a few profanities, irked, then started to run, dragging Virgil with him. This was enough to snap Virgil out of his state, as he started running alongside Logan as fast as he could. The sound of the Frogman thudding behind them, hot on their trail, motivated them to keep going.

Virgil would never consider himself particularly athletic, which paired with the fact his legs were quite short created a challenge as he attempted to keep up with Logan, however, Adrenaline paired with the fact Logan wouldn’t have let him fall behind if he wanted to keep him as far from the Frogman as possible.

The journey out the forest was a blur. Virgil remembered stumbling however he got back up immediately. Logan shined the torch in front of them so they didn’t run into any trees. As a few minutes passed the sound of the Frogman following them faded away but neither would risk stopping. They continued forward and by some miracle, they had returned to the clearing where they had started, Logan’s pickup truck only a few yards away.

Logan slowed down to a stop outside it. “It’s alright, he won’t follow us out here.”

“That’s… really… great… Lo.” Virgil panted. He could feel his heart pounding in his head as he breathed so heavily he thought he might cough his lungs out. “How…are you…back to normal…so fast?”

“Oh, I did track in high school. Now you stay there while I get something.”

Virgil leaned against the truck as Logan rummaged around in his glove compartment. He pulled out an emergency foil blanket. He wrapped it over Virgil’s shoulders. “I only have one so you better keep that on. That water was freezing and I don’t want you getting hypothermic. You’re still soaking wet after all. Are you injured anywhere?” 

Unsure, Virgil checked. Sure enough, he had a cut on his shin. Damn, it must’ve happened when I tripped, he thought to himself. Only as the energy from the run wore off, he started to feel it sting.

“Is it okay if I clean that cut for you? I have a first aid kit in the truck’s cargo bed.” 

“Thanks, dude, I would really appreciate that. You better get under this blanket right after though, you’re not allowed to get hypothermic either.”

Logan smiled then pulled out a first aid kit from the back of the truck. “You can have a seat on the grass.” Once Virgil did, Logan joined him. “How are you feeling?”

“Still in shock and denial. It’ll probably only sink in later tonight that we got chased by the actual Frogman. How about you?” 

“Honestly…I feel incredible. We saw the Frogman! The Frogman is real” Logan grinned. “Also, this might hurt a bit” he warned Virgil as he disinfected the cut. He was right. Virgil’s eyes pricked with tears.

“It’s a good thing my jeans were already so ripped, that way people won’t even question this one.” he joked. 

“Did your camera survive that? I hope it’s not water damaged.”

“Nah don’t worry, it’s been through a lot. A little fall and water aren’t going to be the thing to break it.” He inspected the camera. “Unfortunately…I can’t say the same for the footage. The memory card looks completely fried.”

Logan’s smile fell. “That’s a shame, although maybe it’s for the best. The Frogman can continue living his best life in the forest with no scientists looking for him since there’s still no evidence.”

“Really?” Virgil asked incredulously. “You. The smartest person I know. Is against scientists?”

“Well… I’m not against scientists but having watched E.T. as a kid, I wouldn’t trust them with any rare or unusual beings.” He put a plaster on the cleaned injury then looked at his handiwork proudly.

Virgil was bemused by this. “You do know that’s a fictional movie, right?” After Logan did not answer he decided it was best to change tact. 

“C’mon, join me under this blanket so you can warm up before we drive away. I’m thinking we go to mine? I can make us some hot chocolate and we can decide what to do with the assignment. I can also lend you some dry clothes if you don’t mind being dressed Emo.” 

Logan moved so he was sat next to Virgil, their shoulders touching as the blanket covered them. “Sounds great Vee.”

“It’s a shame we wasted the evening though.” Virgil moped, but then Logan turned to face him. Their faces were mere inches away.

“Actually, I wouldn’t call it a wasted evening. I had a lot of fun spending the evening with you. “ 

Virgil was more taken aback by that than he was by him cursing at the Frogman. “I enjoyed spending the evening with you too. You’re really kind and surprisingly easy to talk to. I hope we could maybe spend some time together after this assignment is over if that’s something you’d like?” 

Virgil felt the tips of his ears burning as his face flushed completely. He knew he was being obvious now but it seemed worth it. Putting himself out there didn’t seem as scary with Logan.

Logan spoke as gently as he had when they were standing in the creek together.

“About that. I wanted to tell you something before we were rudely interrupted earlier.”

“Mhm?” Virgil murmured, not trusting himself to say any proper words.

“I believe I have romantic feelings for you, Virgil. I highly enjoy speaking with you and when you’re around my heart begins to beat faster. If you were to feel the same way I would love to take you on a date perhaps? With fewer cryptids, I assure you. If not-”

“Me too,” Virgil said, in disbelief, cutting him off. He didn’t want to hear the ’If not’ because he liked Logan back. A lot. He took hold of Logan’s hand. 

“If it’s okay with you Logan, can I kiss you?” He was surprised by his own confidence, but it felt right. Everything felt right.

Logan answered not with words but by closing the gap between the two of them. It was short and sweet. According to Virgil, it was perfect. Perhaps the evening wasn’t a waste after all.

[mychemicalficrecs]

Hiya! Not sure if you do this, but would you be able to suggest some non-ao3 finished frerard fics? It seems I've read ao3's entire collection 😅 Thank you so much, you're honestly my favourite blog on here xx

Thanks for your kind words, Nonny! And... congratz on reading the entire ao3 tag, there are a lot of works there :D

Frank/Gerard is such a popular ship that I was actually able to find quite a lot from outside ao3.

Non-AO3 Frank/Gerard

Thing-Thing by sinsense, 43k, NC-17. When Gerard signed the admissions paperwork for the Fordhaven School for Boys, he knew he was signing up for four years of sexual frustration. No one was gay at Fordhaven. Gerard was all-too-aware that he would be a virgin until he graduated. In his senior year, though, this stupid gay freshman disproves Fordhaven's straightness, and throws Gerard's entire world off-kilter. Now, in between drawing, avoiding bullies, running an incredibly serious tabletop RP game, failing out of math, and hanging out with friends, Gerard is also busy kind of falling for this asshole who's way too young for him. It's not what he planned on, but it's what's happening. In conclusion: high school sucks.

I Think I Thought (I Saw You Try) by thatsfinewithus, ~3,000, NC-17. Welcome to some weird AU world in which Gee only does awesome comics and Frank is a vampire.

They Came From Outer Jersey! by thatsfinewithus, 25k, R. New London Fire is an elite fringe government force assigned the task of protecting the earth from some of its more interesting threats: those from beyond the atmosphere or even the universe. They've handled dangerous cases before, but they've never seen anything like...ZOMBIES FROM SPACE. Vampires, long hunted in lore and legend, are now the earth's only saviors. There is little information as to who sent the creatures until Mikey Way, head of the NLF, finds out more by being abducted. Is it too late for him? Is it too late for the earth? Find out how six vampires, one government general, and one frustrated comic book artist save the earth in...THEY CAME FROM OUTER JERSEY!!

I never told you what I do for a living. by not0_fuckin_kay, 60k+, PG-13 to NC-17. Frank Iero, male nurse at Pete Wentz's private hospital and possibly more to one new patient he can't keep his eyes off of. When a new pateint is brought in with amnesia, just days before Christmas, and with nothing but the clothes on his back and a strange drawing, it's left to Frank to find out who he is and what happened to him. When he does, it changes Frank's life forever, as he's thrust into love and health scares he never thought would complicate his life. This is the story of how he tries to make it through, juggling his job and his love-life and just trying to make things better. With Patrick the doctor, Bob the ward supervisor, Travis the unlikely therapist, and Mikey, the sometimes wannabe homicidal geek.

Of All The Hidden Corners by moneyes, ~44K, PG-13. An epic, adventurous tale filled with alternate universes, lords, mischief, magical powers, snark, boyfriends, and luck of the bad kind.

All We Are by lightisbreaking, 21k, R. Set in the future, where humans are on the brink of evolution. For the select few born with a special awareness of their own minds - an awareness which gives them abilities beyond the norm, life is suddenly a very dangerous thing. Frightened of what this could mean, the government set out to make this new race of humans extinct, telling the public that these people are mentally unstable defectives and must be kept under observation for the safety of the public. All of this brings together a rather odd troupe of people, hiding from the government and eventually having to protect one of their own when he's taken into custody. Superpowers AU!

Tell Us a Story by bexless, imogenedisease, 32k, NC-17. The world as these kids know it is ending, and Gabe Saporta is throwing the party. High school AU based on the movie Can't Hardly Wait.

Stay Right Here by idktbh, swagneto, 28k, R. Frank is involved in an accident which renders him paralyzed from the waist down. When Frank begins to withdraw into himself, his relationship with Gerard crumbles and the band faces the hardest decision they'll ever make: whether to continue playing or not. This is a story about how MCR copes with the biggest obstacle of their career so far.

Return to Spirit Lake by inpurity, 22k, R. Gerard Way has left Spirit Lake when he was eighteen to study to become a veterinary surgeon, and with no intention of ever coming back. Twelve years later he is back, carrying secrets of a life spent away from his family and friends, and the weight of a dark, painful sorrow. His old home town has not changed, but his life, and the lives of the people he will meet along the way, will never be the same.

These Friday Night Lights by faux-disco-sins, 21k, PG-13. Gerard is the head cheerleader and wears the cheer skirt, Frank is on the football team, Pete is the school mascot, Ryan is the school’s hobo journalist, Jon does photography for the yearbook, Spencer and Patrick are in the marching band, Gabe and Ray are AV techs who do a ESPN spin-off for the school, Bob is the big scary lineman, and Mikey tries to fit in while ignoring the fact that his older brother is wearing a skirt in public.

Of Love And Superpowers by mcrnut, 20k, NC-17. Seventeen year old Frank Iero is in his last year at Mutant High. He has a couple of good friends, is doing okay in school and even though he has some issues with his Mother, life is pretty great. That is, until one day, when he overhears some of the professors talking about the well-known Anti-Mutant organization HSA and how they have already broken into two Mutant Academies and are heading their way. Frank and his friends have to stick their heads together and try to solve the mystery, and as if Frank didn't have enough to think about already, he finds himself falling for his friend's older brother, Gerard.

Cypress Grove by slashxyouxup, 24k+, NC17. My Chemical Romance fight off a town of sperm hoarding, men hating, PMSing maniac women in order to save themselves from certain doom! Also, Frank and Gerard get closer than close while pretending to not be completely in love with each other. Mikeyway is not amused.

Sleepwalker by lyrical_tragedy, 73k, NC-17. Frank Iero is one of the best cops in New Jersey so it’s only natural that his boss dumps a seemingly unsolvable case on him and his colleague Bob Bryar. With no leads whatsoever Frank enlists the help of Gerard Way, a reclusive young man who experiences strong visions and dreams of events from the past and visions of the future. However, none of them could ever begin to expect the terrifying chain of events that come into play once they delve deeper into the unknown, questioning Frank’s very beliefs on what the world actually holds. A story of visions, sacrifices, over protective brothers and love all in the midst of the attempted destruction of the world. The devil’s got your number and he will come calling, until it’s nothing more than hell on earth.

Patience Is A Virtue (You Might Be Good Looking, But You Can’t Sleep With Yourself Tonight) by eflorentino, 22k, NC-17. Frank Iero’s biggest hero is Gerard Way; the outspoken, obnoxious lead singer of the multi-platinum selling band My Chemical Romance. His world changes completely when he finds himself suddenly shoved into the limelight, playing sell-out shows every night and earning more than his usual $6 an hour. However, the infamously homophobic frontman isn’t what Frank expects, and after mixed signals and unsolved revelations he learns that, with Gerard Way, things are never simple.

But Nobody Cares If You're Losing Yourself by red_ones_fly, 16k, NC-17. It took me a while to work out that there was something wrong with Gerard, he kept it hidden well and, really, he didn’t even know something was wrong with him. To him it seemed like normal, everyday stuff. He never found any of his behaviour out of the ordinary. To him it was just reality.’ After Gerard's grandma passes away his behaviour becomes strange. He becomes less outgoing and more paranoid. As Frank tries to work out what’s going on with his friend/love interest, between school, learning psychology and dealing with the jocks, he doesn’t realise just how bad it is.

Parks and Recreation by vinvy, 35k+, PG-13. Gerard Way is an art school drop out with no prospects, student loans to pay off, and a dead end job. His mother works too hard and his little brother Mikey is keeping secrets. His boss runs shady contracts and smiles too much. It's nothing special and he tells himself that he'll learn to make peace with that- in the meantime he's got to carve out a living that doesn't involve artwork. Really, he's going to be okay. Then a crazy homeless kid comes along and screws up Gerard's Adventures in Normal Employment with his hippie magic and soulless eyes. Gerard can't shake the feeling that this guy "isn't quite right" but he's too busy fending off the freak accidents that are following him around to worry about that particular winged freak.

Empire Boys by noctecaelum, 30k, NC-17. In the city that never sleeps, it's tough to get your foot in the door. While Gabe Saporta may find it easy to blend into the socialite scene; Gerard Way spends his day blending eyeshadow at Bloomingdales. As newcomer Frank triumphs in Women's Lingerie, Gerard sparks a bitter rivalry in the vicinity of Lexington and 59th; but there's no use crying over spilt coffee because things are about to fire up. Meanwhile, on the Upper East Side, Gabe Saporta is none too pleased to read a socialite-bashing article, but when confronting the writer, he doesn't expect to meet fresh faced, pretty-boy William Beckett, who turns out to be the biggest tease this side of the Downtown Dunkin' Donuts.

The Evolution Index by theficisalie, 32k, NC-17. In a world where superpowers are just another thing that can get you sent to boarding school, Frank Iero and his friends know what it's like to operate under heavy levels of stress. After all, they did spend their formative years under the wings of the United States Government's most widespread and successful initiatives; a program that was created to protect and train young Americans with superpowers to become functioning members of society. And, as a side-benefit, the government realized that not only were telepaths great at taking drink orders, but they could also be trained to be highly successful secret agents. Under the guidance of Frank's volatile and (literally) power-hungry boyfriend Gerard Way; Frank, Mikey Way, and Ray Toro are an accomplished team of super spies. When a handful of people from Frank's sordid past crop up during an investigation of rash Superhuman disappearances across the country, the team finds themselves challenged both on and off the field as they fight to solve the mysteries plaguing their beloved nation. Frank knows all too much about uncovering things that he'd rather keep hidden, but can he and his team unravel the intricate web of crime and kidnapping surrounding Chicago without losing themselves in the process?

A Good Ocean Gone Wrong by xoxxblitz7, 32k, NC-17. Titanic AU - The Way's are one of the richest families in America and sometimes being an artist requires the need to travel. On the doomed maiden voyage of Titanic old friends are found, new love is formed and put to the test and the most luxurious crossing of the Atlantic ocean becomes a fight for survival.

A Fanfiction (In Which Gerard Has A Secret Stash of Star Wars Fanfiction) by sparklefap, 10k, R. Frank finds Gerard's bizarrely erotic Star Wars fanfiction, and is both disturbed and aroused by it. Those feelings won't do for Frank. He seeks revenge.

[exkernal]

Philosophy Class for Rock Bottom Demons: 3/3

Every morning starts the same. After his shower, he takes Jason for his morning walk, rain or shine (though it's usually shine in Arizona). He always stops at the pet-friendly coffee shop just a few blocks from his apartment complex.

It's got nothing on Friends, but Michael finds it charming in its own way.

The early morning patrons are a cross section of humanity. There's the bleary-eyed students with their green hair and nose rings, cramming or killing time with surprisingly affordable coffee. There's the elderly regulars, including the couple who always argues in Spanish, yet at the same time, he always remembers to pick up her extra sweeteners and she always dabs away his espresso-stache. There's the dog walkers in their jogging pants, happy to have a place to relax with their pooches.

Then there's Michael, who's a bit of all three.

To his fellow patrons, Michael Realman is friendly if slightly eccentric, with an equally friendly dog. He can't help himself from talking to whoever will listen. He loves to weave together the story of his human life, sprinkled with embellished little half-truths, like the disapproving, stern father or the love-hate rivalry with his actress sister.

One day his favorite barista, Kelsey, asks if he's married.

Michael tells them that he met his wife a lifetime ago, when he was in a "bad place." He was practically a different person then, one he's not proud of. He can tell they don't believe him--that they can't see him as anything but an enthusiastic and kind old man--but he insists all the same. He says that his wife brought out the best in him, helping him to become the person he is today. She was his partner in crime, who'd gone with him to hell and back, and he's been a little lost since she died.

When Kelsey asks her name, she says, "Eleanor."

Since Chidi left, Micheal's spent his evenings at the clown house. Eleanor has other distractions during the day, like visits with Mindy and Tahani, or strolls down a Senegalese street, but the evenings are for them. The only two non-Janet members of Team Cockroach left in the Good Place. Sometimes he brings chips and queso, and sometimes he brings tubs of Chunky Monkey. Sometimes their watch list is Chidi-approved and cerebral, sometimes it's pure reality TV trash.

"How is it," Eleanor says, scooping a dollop of sour cream and pico, "that crap like Love is Blind is still addictive in Heaven, where I can literally spend my days soaring on a freaking eagle? I keep thinking that I'm going to, like, lose twenty points or something."

"Love is Blind isn't that bad," Michael says. "Okay, the Messica stuff is, but I for one think Cameron and Lauren's relationship is precious. They're love is so pure--" he catches himself, wincing. "Sorry, Eleanor."

"Dude, what are you sorry for?" she says through a mouthful of nachos. "I'm not some fragile little girl who'll collapse because other people are in love. Does it suck that Chidi's gone? Fork yeah it does. But I'm dealing with it."

"Okay," he says. "Then I'm sorry for making it weird."

"You are making it weird by apologizing so much!" Eleanor says, laughing a little. She grabs a throw pillow and whacks him in the chest. It feels like nothing. "So knock it off. We can gush about our feelings and shirt another time. Right now, I just want to unwind with a classic Eleanor and Michael trash bag hangout. That cool?"

"Completely," he says. "Let the trashiness commence."

They sit with his arm around her shoulder and her head resting on the crook of his neck. Michael's relieved they still have this. Though he feels guilty for the thought, he can't help his relief that out of all the humans, she's the one still with him. He misses Chidi and Jason and Tahani every day, but he'd gladly trade them if he can still have Eleanor.

As the episode credits roll, Eleanor peers up at him. "You know, there is something I've been missing since Chidi left, that I think you could help me out with."

"Oh?"

"I've got a certain itch that needs scratching, if you're picking up what I'm putting down."

Michael snaps his fingers excitedly. "Yes! I actually think I am!"

She laughs. "Dude, reign in the adorkableness, or I'm not going to be able to contain myself. But seriously," she adds, voice going low. "Are you interested? Because I know it might be more...complicated for you, and I don't want to ignore your feelings."

Oh, right. In his excitement at finally mastering human coyness, he brushed right past the actual implication.

"It wouldn't be weird for me," he says, stammering a little. "If it's not weird for you, I mean. I just want you to be happy."

"I can think of a few ways you can make me happy," she says, running her fingers through his hair.

He bends down, crashing his lips to hers. He's become quite good at kissing over the Bearimys, or at least, at kissing Eleanor. While the old Michael would've been disgusted by the mere thought, the new Michael craves every touch, from the pressure of her teeth around his lip to the way her thumb glosses over his cheek bone.

"It sounds like you really loved her," Clare says, near the end of their guitar lesson.

"More than anything," he nods.

"You never completely get over loss," she says. "I had the hardest time accepting it when my Frank died. I kept expecting to find him drinking his coffee at the kitchen island or pulling up weeds in the garden. It was a struggle, coming to terms with the fact that I'll never see him again."

"Oh, I think you might," Michael says. He knows that she's heard these tired platitudes ad nausea, but it's true. She will see Francis DiSandro again, once they both pass their Good Place tests. They have that to look forward to. Whereas he knows that he will never, ever see Eleanor again.

He tries to push that thought aside. He doesn't want to think about that now, not here in his friend's dining room, surrounded by her potted plants and twin grandkids' scattered possessions. He spots Ben's open book and Abbie's solitary discarded sock and wonders, fleetingly, what it's like to be a child. That's one human experience that will always be a mystery to Michael.

"That's a lovely thought," she says diplomatically. "Same time Thursday?"

"I wouldn't miss it."

He wonders what it's like to sleep, as he watches Eleanor lying naked under the covers. Eleanor certainly looks peaceful. Innocent, too. The way the sunlight hits her hair makes it almost seem to glow.

She murmurs a happy little sound. Her blue-green eyes flash open.

"This has to be so boring for you," she yawns. "Watching me sleep. I wouldn't be offended if you left."

"I want to stay," he says, stroking her hair. "Besides, what's the rush? I have an eternity of time on my hands."

Eleanor sits up a little. "Are you sure this is okay? I mean, don't get me wrong, the sex is way better than okay--you can it get, demon buddy." His chest swells with pride, despite himself. "But you'd tell me if there were any issues right? Like if it's not cool with you?"

"Of course," he says, smiling at her worried expression. "But you don't have to worry, because I'm way more than cool with it."

He's not sure how she can think that it's anything less than bliss for him.

Dreams are some of his favorite human things (at the very least, they're in his top 200 favorite things) but he could do without the nightmares.

Sometimes he's in the Bad Place during his apprentice days. He hears the familiar soundtrack of screams as he tortures his assigned human, only to realize after he's ripped off its fingernails that it's Jason or Chidi or Tahani or Eleanor. Sometimes his friends are being tortured by Shawn, Trevor, and Vicki while he watches in helpless horror. They beg him to save them, but try as he might, he can't reach them in time.

He wakes up in the dark, panting. It's just a bad dream, he tells himself. He saved his humans, and all of them lived out their best existences in the Good Place.

But it's not enough to stop the flood of bad memories. Michael at his desk, mapping out his grand neighborhood scheme. Michael cackling evilly in Eleanor's face. Michael gleefully tossing humans into the lava pits. Of all of the souls that he tortured, how many actually deserved it? Maybe ten. Ten, out of millions. The kindly, harmless Michael that his friends and neighbors know has tortured more people than any human war criminal.

He remembers what Jason said about guilt versus shame.

Gingerly, Michael gets out of bed, careful not to disturb Jason (the dog) curled up at his feet. He puts on his slippers, stubbing his toe in the process (an experience that's both delightful and painful). He pours himself a glass of water because that's what they always do in the movies whenever they have a bad dream.

He's had so many human experiences now, the kinds he could only dream of before. That peculiar chemical tang in his hair after swimming in a chlorinated pool. Waiting forty minutes on a customer service call. Feeling his stomach rumble with pesky hunger pains, his bones ache whenever he was exhausted yet couldn't sleep, the sweet release of a pee break after a two-hour road trip. Some days it's enough to make him forget that he was ever anything but human, until nightmares like this remind him that he was a demon once, too.

Maybe one day he'll come to terms with being both.

"Eleanor?" Michael asks.

"Sup, demon bud?" Eleanor flashes him a classic Shellstrop smile. "Or should I say, soon-to-be-human bud?"

"That's what I want to talk about," he says quickly, licking his lips. They're in the clown house, waiting for Janet to escort him to the portal. In fifteen, maybe ten minutes time, he's going to leave the Good Place. Who knows when (or if) he'll ever be back? "How do I know this is the right decision? What if I go to Earth, realize it's a mistake, and then it's too late to go back?"

"Having second thoughts, I see. How very human of you," she says. "Let's talk this out. How are you really feeling?"

"Nervous," he says after careful thought. "But also excited. It's an equal mix of both."

"Michael, that's like the most human combo ever," she says, patting his back. "I don't think we ever go through any major change without feeling both nervous and excited at the same time."

"Really?"

She nods. "That's just how it is. Look, I arranged this whole thing because you deserve to be happy. If you really don't want to, don't. But if you're just grappling with the whole all-change-is-scary-even-good-change deal, than I say take that leap."

A leap into faith. That's what this is, isn't?

"You're right," he says. "I'm just being silly."

Her smile is so bright. He wishes he could freeze this moment forever, so he can always see her smiling like this. "You're just being human."

The door opens.

"Michael?" Janet says. Her voice is as pleasant as always, but something's a little off. "They're ready for you now."

The finality hits him like a runaway trolley. He looks into Eleanor's eyes into a momentary panic, because they both know that this is it. Unless he's hit by a truck the second he gets to Earth, Eleanor will have already walked through the door by the time he dies. This is it for them.

Without breaking eye contact, she cups his face into her hands.

"I love you, Michael," she says.

He knows it's not the same kind of love that she has for Chidi, or that Michael has for her, but it means everything to him that she said it.

"I love you, too," he says. His eyes sting. There are tears in her eyes, too, threatening to spill over.

"Look at us saps," he sniffles. "Getting all weepy."

"Pretty pathetic, huh?" he says, dabbing at his eyes.

"Michael, promise me that you're going to live it up down there. That you'll be the most adorkable, bad ass, awesome silver fox that you can be."

"I promise."

That's his last image of Eleanor: her standing in the doorway, rubbing the the tears off of her face.

Today's lesson is on Clare's front porch. It's a warm, breezy day after a week of blistering heat, so they're savoring it together. From the window they can see Abbie and Ben in the living room, watching cartoon dinosaurs. From what Michael gathers, the little T-Rex is friends with the group of herbivores, though they don't all trust him yet.

"Congratulations, Michael," Clare says. "You've officially made it to intermediate level."

He might not be selling out stadiums any time soon, but he's flustered with pride at how far he's come since his first artistic fumbling. If only his friends could hear him now.

"We'll still have lessons, right?" he asks, plucking at the guitar strings.

"Well, I certainly won't refuse if you want to continue paying me," she says. They chuckle.

"You know," Clare says, as Michael strums along to a half-remembered tune. "We could always see each other outside of lessons. We can have dinner sometime, if you want. I know this Italian place I think you'd like, if you're free this weekend."

He looks at her and smiles. "I'd like that."

[the-omni-princess]

Frozen Heart [Chapter 13]

Author: @the-omni-princess

Summary:  After the war against Hydra, King Bucky comes home to take what has been promised to him since he was young, you. But he is not the same person as the young boy that you grew up with. Can she break through his tough shell and bring back the young man she once fell in love with? Or will she be forced to marry the monster everyone thinks he’s become?

Word Count: 3.7K

Pairing: King!Bucky x Fem!Reader (Royalty Au!)

Warnings: Mentions of injuries/torture, fluff, a smudge of angst, mention of a panic attack

A/N:

Here it finally is, lol, I’ve been sick so oof.

Beta by the absolutely amazing @annaloveloki

-

-

[Series Masterlist]  [Masterlist]

----

There were a few things you knew were certain. That every day the sun would rise in the East and set in the West. That every night, if the skies were clear, you could name the constellations set in the sky. That your favorite constellation, secretly, was the same one that was around your neck until Rumlow broke your necklace. That your favorite flowers were the ones Bucky helped you first plant in your greenhouse. That you didn’t mind the cold because it meant Bucky would hold you closer and wrap you in blankets while drinking hot cocoa. That no matter what, you absolutely loved Bucky. And that that insistent beeping you could hear was utterly annoying.

Just on the edge between consciousness and unconsciousness, the beeping sped up faintly, and you realized it echoed the beat in your chest. You groaned softly, the dull pain registering as your body starting to connect with your mind. Straining to open your eyes, you felt the furs of your favorite blanket wrapped around you, you could smell your favorite oils that Wanda would use in your hair. Then the scent of Bucky’s cologne surrounded you, making you unconsciously smile weakly. Bucky’s bed. You were in Bucky’s bed.

The shuffling beside you captured your attention, your eyes struggled to focus on the figures beside your bed. Bucky caught your attention first, you numbly realized his hand was laced with your right hand. Steve was sitting on your other side, his hand laid on top of your wrist lightly, a bandage wrapped around that hand. They both didn’t look away from you for a second, scared that if they looked away you would disappear again. They both still looked grimy and tired, dark circles and longer hair then when you last saw each of them. At least they both looked like they took a shower.

“You two look like hell,” you joked in a raspy voice. The tension was thick in the room, your comment making the men relax ever so slightly; you squirmed faintly, uncomfortable as you attempted to sit up.

Bucky shot forward, his right hand pressed to your stomach, his left on your shoulder, “No, no, you shouldn’t be sitting up now, y/n/n.”

Groaning, you shook him off, sitting up, ignoring the pain shooting through your body. “I feel like I was hit by a train,” you mumbled, before your hand flung to your stomach, the past two weeks flooding into your memory.

Steve saw the panic rush your face, “You’re home, and the baby is okay. Dr. Cho gave you an ultrasound to check and everything.” His clarification calmed you, before you gently laced your hand with Bucky’s.

“I want to know everything, don’t keep me in the dark about what happened,” your voice was clearer now, locking eyes with Bucky.

“My Dove, you don’t want to know everything we did-“ He started, but you promptly shut him with a glare.

“I killed Rumlow. I know of everything those monsters did to both of you, I want to know everything else. Is Pierce dead? Is Zola dead? What will happen to the people of their kingdom? How long was I asleep? Is Aura okay?” You started to ramble, your dry throat decided to close up, making you cough. Bucky rushed forward and helped you drink water, soothing your throat.

“Stubborn,” Steve teased, smiling sadly at you as his thumb rubbed circles onto your wrist. “We’ll tell you, but please relax.”

You sighed softly, nodding as you laid back down. “Well? Go on,” you squeezed Bucky’s hand.

He gave you a small smile in response, “You’re incredible, y/n/n,” he spoke softly, hesitant to speak towards you. He looked like the man he was a few months ago, scared to tell you his nightmares, afraid you would run away from the monster he was. The truth was, he was petrified of what you would think. He broke his promise. Nevertheless, he continued. “Your messages were the reason we could even find you. Zola’s dead, Pierce is in a cell until he signs off his kingdom, which will be renamed, and we are trying to find a new ruler for it, and you’ve been asleep all night and most of the day. Aura is fine.” You spared a glance towards the clock, seeing it was almost 3 in the afternoon. “You were given an IV,  bandaged, and your wounds cleaned. Luckily nothing got infected, I don’t know what we would have done if we didn’t notice your codes. You were gone for two weeks! And gods, you’re a genius for the codes, and it took me so long to realize it, and it’s my fault you were even taken, and-“

“Bucky,” you interrupted, squeezing his hand. “I chose to be taken.”

It was apparently Steve’s turn to interrupt, “Why would you do that?”

You sighed softly, worrying your bottom lip, “He cornered me in my room, he said there was already an assassin who could hurt Bucky, so I sent Aura. Then at the balcony, there were more guards behind the doors. If you came closer, they would have taken you too. I made a choice. I don’t blame you for my own decisions.”

That seemed to satisfy Steve, who stood, “Well, you’re home now, so I’ll let you two catch up then.”

You tugged on his sleeve weakly with your injured hand, halting his movements to leave. “I missed you, Stevie,” you gave him your best ‘I’m your baby sister’ voice.

He turned back around, letting you tug him into a careful hug. He held you close, making sure not to put any pressure on your still injured body, careful of the wires attached to you. “I missed you too, y/n/n,” he murmured softly, sighing softly before pulling away from your arms. “Catch up, I’m staying until after your coronation anyway, so I’ll be around,” he teased, kissing your head. You gave him your best reassuring grin as he walked out the door, leaving you and Bucky alone.

“I also missed you, every day,” you whispered, looking back towards Bucky. You let yourself take it all in, the past two weeks felt like a blur.

“You did it to protect me?” his voice broke, making your heart drop. “Why would you do that?”

“Because I love you. I’d do anything to protect you, especially from those monsters.” You gently cusped his jaw in your hand, and despite the voice in his head, he leaned into your touch, desperate for the comfort.

“I’m not worth your life, My Dove, I’m not worth anything.” You gasped softly, tugging him closer.

“James Buchanan Barnes, you don’t need your father’s name, or to slay every dragon to be worth something. You’ve done enough, you are enough. You deserve some happiness of your own, My Love.” You finally had him close enough to kiss him. He keened for your kiss, not hesitating to push himself closer to you. One more tug and he found himself practically on top of the bed; you deepened the kiss, sucking on his lower lip, proud of yourself as he groaned softly. He held himself at an angle to not hurt you as he kissed you senseless.

You both broke the kiss, breathless, and he grinned like an idiot. “I think I’ve found it in you, My Queen,” he whispered softly, letting his eyes close as he pressed his forehead against yours. “I was so scared, watching you just being taken, and how were you so brave?”

“I was terrified,” you admitted, letting yourself finally feel everything you were ignoring for two weeks. Tears started to prick at your skin, your sniffling made him open his eyes. Disregarding his own problems, he held your face gently, frowning as he wiped your tears away. He got into the bed with you, letting you bury yourself in his arms, the flood gate opening. “I felt so helpless, but I didn’t focus on them, or the pain. I focused on coming back home, coming back to you.” You smiled, a wet giggle escaping your lips. “You’re my Northern Star, Bucket,” he felt his heartbreak at your words; only wanting to see you smile, he showered you in kisses as he murmured pet names and sweet nothings.

“My strong, intelligent, beautiful, amazing Queen,” he murmured. You buried your head into his chest, letting yourself break down.

“They made me feel dirty, used,” you closed your eyes, blocking out the painful memories, “They barely touched me, and yet…” you shuddered, “I couldn’t stop them.”

“None of that was your fault, My Love,” he gently pushed a strand of hair out of your face and behind your ear, tenderly holding your face in his hands. “You did absolutely wonderful. You’re absolutely wonderful.” He smiled sadly, sniffling as he let his own tears fall. “I missed you so much.”

You held yourself even closer, desperate for his comfort, “I missed you even more,” you smiled faintly, letting yourself finally break down in the only place you felt safe. He simply held you tighter as you cried into his shoulder, kissing your head lovingly.

“I’m never letting you out of my sight again,” you smiled warmly.

“I don’t doubt that for a second,” you teased, relaxing in his arms. You let the moment pass, the two of you silent in each other’s arms, just wanting to reassure yourselves that you two were really there, that this wasn’t some dream. “Steve said you guys did an ultrasound?” you whispered softly, moving your head slightly to look at him.

He nodded, picking up an envelope from the bedside. “Dr. Cho said the baby was perfectly healthy, that the mysterious blue liquid they kept giving you was a mix of hormones and chemicals to keep you weak, sluggish, as the opposite of an adrenaline shot. It didn’t hurt the baby though, and she told me not to open this until you were awake and responsive.” He handed you the envelope, which you opened quickly. “Didn’t give me much hint as to why,” he mumbled, watching you open it.

You pulled the small picture out, an ultrasound. The baby was only a small dot on the grainy picture but that’s not what caught your attention. You gasped softly, looking up at Bucky, how just look plain confused. “Do you see that, My Love?” you asked gently, squeezing his hand lightly.

He shook his head, “Dots? And numbers?”

You giggled, smiling up at him as you took his hand. You pointed at one small circle, “Baby 1,” then you moved your hand to another small circle beside the first. “Baby 2,” You spoke softly, pulling the small parchment that was also in the envelope, Dr. Cho’s writing simply telling you what you already figured out. “Twins, Bucky. We’re having twins.”

Amused, you watched his eyes widen, taking in the new information. “Twins?” he whispered softly. You nodded, grinning as you saw his smile grow. “We’re having twins!” He launched at you in a hug, setting you off in a fit of giggles. “Gods! Twins!” He mumbled against your skin, and you buried yourself closer.

“Definitely going to need some help. We’re going to have two mini-us running around soon enough, and I could barely deal with you and Steve when we were younger. How can I deal with two us?” you started to ramble.

Bucky simply placed his hands to cup your jaw, effectively shushing you. His smile crinkled his eyes, and you couldn’t help but get lost in his eyes like you had wanted to for weeks. “I’ll be there to help, My Love. We can do this. They will be absolutely perfect,” he kissed your nose playfully, chuckling as you scrunched your face up in response.

“You’re going to spoil them rotten, aren’t you?” You teased, smiling up at him as you leaned into his touch.

The hand that you weren’t leaning against moved to your stomach. “Without a single doubt,” he teased back, his fingers tracing patterns into the fabric above your stomach. “And you are also getting spoiled rotten, My Love. I have two weeks to make up for, Courtship-wise, and it starts the second you are clear to leave this bed.” His mischievous smile was back, and you were a bit nervous as to what he was planning.

You buried yourself into his arms again, yawning faintly as you closed your eyes, nodding. “Can’t wait,” you teased, voice dying as you easily fell asleep in his arms. Safe, content. Home.

-

Turns out, it was about a week and a half until Dr. Cho let you leave your bed for more than small exercise or bathing or food. Most of your bruises were faded, almost completely gone; the smaller cuts only had pink scars left to heal; the small fractures in your bones were almost completely healed over; and the worst of your injuries, the stab wound to your hand, was only a bad scab still healing over now. It was more for the babies’ health and keeping you hydrated and well-fed than anything. You were dehydrated, and malnourished, all your vital nutrients going directly to the fetuses growing in you for the two weeks you were held captive. But now you were alright, and finallycleared to roam the castle again.

You noticed the difference immediately. Bucky, most likely with some help, had been upkeeping the flowers in your greenhouse, as well as the rest of the castle. The only guards near you anymore were the ones you’ve trusted for years, no more new guards. Aurora and Raine and Dermot were all excited to see you – Raine having practically tripled in size since the last time you saw the pup.

Life wasn’t perfect right now, and there was more than one slip up, including the other day when a loud noise outside your room that sounded so similar to your former cell door being slammed shut caused you to have a panic attack. Despite both you and Bucky having backward steps in your mental health, you always leaned on each other. The more you confided in him with what Hydra did when the cameras were off, the more he was upset he killed them all so quickly.

But it was over now. The former King Pierce signed away his kingdom, and after much debate, it was given to Lady (now Queen) Brunnhilde. Formerly of Asgard, and one of the Valkyrie warriors that fought in the War, the Avengers council thought she would be a good Queen for the masses. Tough, yet with a gentle heart. Plus, she would have the help of Asgard and the rest of the Kingdoms, whenever needed. Once that was official, the executioner, Nick Fury, took great pleasure in killing Pierce. You found that a bit archaic, the idea of the South’s favorite executioner killing the man, but it was a more humane death than the one Natasha told you Bucky had suggested. Release him into the woods and let the wolves hunt him down. With Hydra dead, your own people joyful for your return, and everything set for the winter, you and Bucky focused on the wedding as well as your coronation. And that’s where you currently found yourself.

A new snow storm had settled into the mountains surrounding the castle, and you were in the kitchen, sitting on the counter, waiting patiently and reading. Bucky looked a mess, covered in flour and icing, trying to perfect another Southern cake for you. He wanted to make the cake for the wedding, although you knew despite his best attempts, he wouldn’t be able to make a cake for the hundreds of royals, nobles, and commoners that were planning on attending. He wouldn’t let you see the cake, quite yet, very adamant that he wanted to perfect it first before he let you try it. His brows were furrowed, eyes crossed in concentration as he frosted his latest attempt. He groaned in frustration, tossing the icing bag aside. “What’s wrong, My Love?” you put down the book you were reading, now focused on the upset king in front of you.

“I messed up,” he murmured in a soft voice, looking closer to a kicked puppy than the 6-foot man he was.

“Aw, that’s alright, My Love, I’m sure it’s fine,” you coed softly, tugging him closer, ignoring the mess of flour on his apron. He leaned his head onto your shoulder, wrapping his arms around your waist, standing in between your legs. You wrapped your legs around his hips, locking your ankles together, running your fingers through his hair. “You’re doing wonderful, Buck, I’m sure it’s a barely noticeable mistake.”

“I want it to be perfect though,” he whined softly, making you chuckle.

“You made it and you tried your hardest. That’s what counts,” you pulled him back enough to tilt his head up to look you in the eye. “It doesn’t need to be perfect to be marvelous.” He smiled faintly, looking up at you as if you hung the stars in the sky. “There’s that smile I love so much,” you teased before leaning the last inch in and kissing him soundly on the lips. Firm yet gentle, everything yet never enough. You smiled against his lips, pressing your forehead against his. Recently your kisses always ended like this. Wrapped in each other’s arms, Bucky’s hand protectively on your stomach, and you two grinning like idiots.

“I think I should leave the baking to the professionals for the wedding,” he whispered softly, his breath fanning across your lips as you stayed close to him.

“That sounds like a smart decision, My Love,” you teased, unable to wipe the smile off of your face. “Wouldn’t want you too worked up before the ritual.” You kissed him chastely, before he was the one to smile.

“That reminds me, I have something for you.” He pulled away, that charming smile back on his lips. He reached into his pocket and pulled out two velvet boxes, a longer rectangular one, and a small cube shaped one. You gave him a playful look, having told him hundreds of times that he didn’t have to get you anything, but after the whole Hydra deal, you decided to let him pamper you for the next few weeks. “Don’t give me that look, this one I already know you’ll love,” he teased, opening the rectangular box. Inside was the constellation necklace Rumlow had ripped off of you, the one you thought had been lost forever. “Thought you might want it back, My Love,” he whispered softly.

Smiling excitedly, you tugged him into another kiss, more passionate and hungrier than the last. You broke away for a second, “I didn’t even know you had found it, I thought it was gone forever, lost in the snow.” You admitted softly, leaning against him as you let him put the necklace in its rightful spot around your neck.

“When you were gone, it was one of the few things I could look at of yours without going crazy. Took me a while to fix it, the clasp and some parts of the chain were broken, but here it is,” he grinned, and you noticed the ticks he had when he was nervous start to flare up as he fiddled with the smaller box in his hand.

“And what’s that, My Love?” You asked softly, tenderly running your thumb across his cheek.

“Well, I know our cultures are different, but there’s one tradition that we haven’t quite done, and I know it’s less important in the South, but I still wanted to do it, though here in the middle of the kitchen looking like a mess is hardly the way you deserve-” you could practically see the cogs turning in his head, the rant spilling from his mouth.

“Bucky,” you whispered softly, pulling his attention back to you. “Just show me.”

He nodded, hesitantly pulling away from your arms. He tugged you to your feet, tenderly pushing a strand of hair behind your ear, making you blush. “Y/n,” he started, taking a deep breath to calm himself. “I’ve been in love with you since we were children, before I even knew the meaning of forever, I knew I wanted to be by your side for the rest of my life, for forever. Whether that was as your friend, a confidant, or as your husband, I knew I wanted to desperately be with you in any way you would allow me. Now, I know how right younger me was. I crave you in every sense of the word, your very touch grounds me to this world yet sends me to heaven every time. You are my guide, my way back home because you are my home. My Love, My Queen, My Northern Star, will you do me the absolute blessing of being your husband, and marry me?” By now he had opened the box as he sunk to one knee, showing you a diamond ring in the velvet box. It was a starburst floral diamond, surrounded by a halo of diamonds as well.

You felt your breathing hitch, your hand covering your mouth. You couldn’t think of a proper reply, so you let your first thoughts be your response. “I thought I had already agreed to that, My Love?” you mumbled, letting a smile overtake your lips.

“Is that a yes?” he shot back, his responding nervous smile made your heart flutter.

“Of course, it is!” You lunged at him, attacking him in a hug, which sent both of you tumbling to the ground. You were both laughing, grinning at each other like idiots as he placed the ring on you, before eagerly kissing you again. And again. And again. Covered in flour and icing, on top of each other on the kitchen floor, smiling at each other. It was perfect. It was home.

-

Tags:

Frozen Heart Tags:

@jsmith509 / @lumar014 / @littlemissporter / @kaylaphantomhive  

@damnbuckyishot / @aveatquevale- / @booksbeforebois  

@marvelgirl7 / @minetticatinwonderland  / @irreplaceable-spacexual / @mallorydoesstuff / @heartislubbingdubbing

Bucky Tags:

@cassandras-musings  / @darkness-doughter / @novaddictx / @thedancingnerdmermaid

For a tag, just reply/comment, if I don’t see it, just message me. Tell me what you think! Literally, any comment makes me happy! Like, comment, reblog, interact <3

[invertedfate]

Random Ask Dump - Anniversary Edition (50+ REALLY OLD ASKS!)

Going through OLD AND CRUSTY ASKS to try and chip away at the inbox. HERE WE GOOOO...

That’s an interesting idea, and I could run it by Cake, but I think it would honestly be a LOT to track from a programming perspective. Especially ‘cause killing Sans is gonna result in a “bad ending,” so to speak.

An attempt was made by Undyne to have all three hang out at the same time. Papyrus was SUPER EAGER. ...but one thing led to another and there were many messy explosions of chemicals and lots of smoke. Alphys had to step in before things got out of hand. It was all very daunting for her. Pap and Undyne are VERY LOUD, VERY AMBITIOUS PEOPLE.

I actually have some ideas of some side comics I may do at some point! :o It’s just that right now there’s a lot going on.

I need to poke Carni about that at some point. He’s just been very busy with other projects!

Clearly he’s standing on the “out to lunch” sign.

I wanna say that it’s very possible in theory. :o It probably affects them differently since monsters’ emotional state affects their magic and their physical state.

I do like little easter eggs like that, though I’m not sure where I’d fit it in atm just ‘cause I already showed Pap’s room, haha.

I made the chase theme for Mad Dummy as well as Mad Mew Mew’s battle theme. @pinewsun​ made the battle theme for Mad Dummy, and @thomasthepencil​ made the Season Dude battle theme and MD’s overworld theme. :o

That’s a really fascinating conundrum! You’re absolutely right- if IF was a standalone game, then from a writing standpoint, having more subtle implications would make sense! The reason I chose a different approach for IF is because it’s set after Flowey’s already known to be evil and I like to give different POVs rather than stick to just Frisk’s.

That’s an interesting thing, actually- both fights lean heavily on the fourth wall. Both are treated as climaxes for their given routes. It’s funny because Asriel’s fight is a lot more straightforward and less meta by comparison.

I agree! The thing with Papyrus is that he’s extremely powerful- he just doesn’t want to kill. But it’s a deliberate choice not to kill- he’s able to force his attacks to do next to no damage. He’s also pretty darn crafty, as he made the Gauntlet himself. It really is just a case of Undyne’s personal biases and concern for him.

That was a deliberate choice. :O Papyrus is very influential toward Frisk. He is best skeleboi.

Papybot loves you, anon! He just wants to feed you WHOLESOME SPAGHETTI!!!

It is possible to whistle through teeth. ...alternatively, magic. As for the music, Undertale implies that the music is heard! Maybe it’s just... a thing that exists in this world. Or it’s just meant to be a silly meta joke. I try to keep it somewhat ambiguous other than occasional nods to it. Chara’s pants are lighter because I just... felt like it, I guess? Haha. I wanted their feet and pants to stand out more from each other, so they have khaki pants. As for the Undyne fight being animated, well, this ask is old by now, but Sparks was the one who was down for it.

Well, the teaser’s been out for a long time now, but that’s the idea! It’s also why this has been in production for so long. The Determinator has some really over the top attacks (that weren’t even shown in the teaser), and Sparks animated in Photoshop. That’s how hardcore he is.

Shhhhh. Don’t give me ideas. I’m already slacking on Tem Village. :P

Sometimes I do have slumps and burnouts (see Antipode’s lengthy hiatus), but breaks lead to me being refreshed and coming back with even more enthusiasm than before!

Oh, there are a lot of these throughout the comic. For instance...

Flowey appears in a few background shots in the Ruins!

When Sans says “or maybe...” he looks at the empty flower pot. This was one of the earliest bits of foreshadowing about who created Flowey, and nobody noticed it at the time!

The MTT vending machines initially look like this but have helpful items.

And then they look like this, with an angry face and pose- Mad Dummy has possessed them!

As of Part 38, it’s been revealed that he did first meet Asgore as “Santa.” As for whether or not he knows the truth, time will tell. :o

Oh, these are excellent suggestions for calls! I’ll try to keep these in mind.

So, I believe Glyde uses the Mysterious Door motif. Jerry uses the motif in its battle theme- I believe it’s a mix of original motif and Wrong Number song?

Sans is a master of power napping. He probably gets a decent amount of sleep, though.

There are a lot of ways to interpret Pap’s lack of sleep! In IF, he can get by without it, but he also has a lot of reasons to avoid sleeping. Some reasons include productivity but also due to a looooot of heavy baggage. More on that later.

I think sleep can definitely make monsters healthier. Rest = better mental health as well as physical health, and with how important mental and emotional help is for monsters, that’s very important!

They just really like socks. Socks are warm. Socks are slinky. And googly eyes are the best. So they took on the form of a really eccentric sock puppet and sock collector. Scandalous.

It also has Alphys’ motif, as the two are the leaders of the royal guard!

I would say the lack of Asgore as an influence has left Undyne slightly less grounded? Like, she had Toriel and Gerson in her life, but her relationship with Toriel is... definitely not quite as close? Like, Toriel by that point kept people at an arm’s length due to losing multiple children (including one from old age). So, while they were on friendly terms until the aftermath of the DT experiments and the tapes’ release, it was more like mutual respect and a sorta professional relationship with Undyne admiring Toriel and wanting to spare her from more heartache.

That is a really interesting idea. While that didn’t happen, I do need to maybe revisit the grumpy dog at some point or another. He’s still a lil’ salty.

I think in terms of layout it won’t change much, but there will be new/different content for sure. :O

Mad Dummy’s base design is mostly original, but she has a wig + headband from DIO from Jojo Part 3! Fun fact: While MTT has Kamina shades, Papyrus’ goggles are loosely based on Simon from Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann in terms of color. :O

So basically, when Asriel defeated Frisk, he had the power over the timeline to reset it as he pleased- in theory. However, that power was overwhelming for him, and due his lack of understanding OF said power and one last ditch attempt at resisting from Chara, things went wrong.

There is a track that takes some inspiration from Rage Awakened. It’s not released, and it’s not exact, but it won’t be released for a WHILE. Like until the part comes out.

I think it’s just the fact that tacos are so random. Like, my biggest beef in that regard was that OG Underswap had a lot of arbitrary replacements for things in UT and not all of them made sense. Like, if Sans was to make a foreign food, ramen would’ve made more sense due to Alphys being weeb trash, haha.

Okay, so the rough timeline iiiis... Falling: - Cyan - Green - Orange - Blue - Purple - Yellow Dying: - Cyan - Orange - Blue - Purple - Yellow - Green

You know, it’s funny because this ask is super old, but that’s basically sorta what happened. :O It became a beach-themed resort.

Never forget MTT fangirl Temmie’s pool escapades.

I think Forgespring for me because I had to make the tileset myself (it took a few months, I think?), but Aquarius was definitely in the works for a while. But once I had the tileset from Fours, the rooms were very easy to design!

That woulda been pretty rad! Maybe I can find another spot for it one day, haha.

I think for Dohj, I’d have to check with Fours, but I’m certainly not opposed at some point? Right now, the following chars can take questions: - Frisk - Papyrus - Sans - Undyne - Alphys - Napstablook - Mettaton - Asgore - Chara - Flowey

Cyan appears in Part 45! :O No answer about orange for now, tho.

I do have vague ideas for Tem village. I just haven’t had time to go back and do it.

Stay tuned and you may find out! :O

Hmmmm... I had a lot of fun with MTT SPIRAL and the Determinator, tbh. They were both very time consuming, but I love how they came out! Also, buff Jerry.

Turnabout Storm. :)

It’s a really awesome fan crossover that works way better than it should. :P

None taken! We know that with headcanons, everyone is gonna have their own interpretations. These are just the voices we liked for Fireglobe Production, but everyone has their right to their favored interpretations!

Yeah, Knight Knight is one of the coolest CORE mercs in the original game. It was fun to repurpose them for Inverted Fate as royal guards. :o It made room for unique encounters in the CORE in the form of them robots- as Undyne would rather use machines than other monsters to do her work.

Personally, I see it as an Asriel motif, but I also acknowledge that at one point it WAS gonna be an Asgore motif. Toby has a habit of just using whatever music works for a scene (see sans. at the snail farm.)

I do have a few ideas, though I won’t say for what yet. :o

He’s likely made blueprints for that train. :P

It probably would just have different flavor text/progression!

So basically, I treat the starting motif for BAaTH/Power of NEO is just a “true hero” motif.

MTT is definitely major in IF! As for whether or not he’ll have a hangout, time will tell. There’s definitely more to resolve with him, though.

I’m gonna remake at least a few of the older tracks, including Regret. My goal is just to bring the OST to a similar standard of quality.

So, animated parts coming up: Part 47, Part 49, Part 50. There may be some other parts, but we’re gonna wanna scale things back for a little bit for the sake of all our sanities.

I go with both. ;)

Honestly, probably fairly similar to the bully fight in the Ruins- which is why I ultimately decided not to do one. Both fill similar archetypes, though I think if I did do a battle, I woulda still had Flowey interrupt at the end and scare them off.

It’s a very emotional scene. Far more tragic than her geno death, IMO.

Well, the main goal in that regard is the remasters (Part 9 is in progress). Otherwise, I do think these hiatuses are good for working ahead. I’ve still gotta do more work, though, because my buffer this time around is a lot smaller from the trial-hiatus buffer. Alas!

Honestly, the website is the best thing to happen to IF. It’s allowed us to do so much with the comic’s presentation that would be impossible with imgur. NORIX IS THE BEST...

[omnifalls-10]

Omni Falls Chapter 3: Headhunters

It’s been rather quiet at the Mystery Shack today. That doesn’t seem much of a problem  for Dipper and Mabel, who were in the living room watching a show on television called Duck-tective. While watching the television program, Mabel knits a new sweater and Dipper eats popcorn from a bowl. She reaches for some popcorn, only for him to slap her hand away.

“I'm afraid your services won't be required here, sir.”, the constable taunts, with a condescending smile on his face.  “My men have examined the evidence, and this is obviously an accident.”

“An accident, constable?”, Duck-tective quacks, his webbed feet paddling across the crime scene. “Or is it...Murder?”

“What?!”, the constable yells as the logo of the titular character comes on the screen as the commercials starts. 

“That duck is a genius!”, Mabel gasps as she drops her sweater.

“Eh, it's easier to find clues when you're that close to the ground.”, Dipper shrugs.

Mabel puts her hand on her hip, skeptical. “Dipper, are you saying you could outwit Duck-tective?”

“Mabel, I have very keen powers of observation. ”, Dipper explains, sitting up. “For example, just by smelling your breath, I can tell that you have been eating….” He sniffs the air, looking confused. “..an entire tube of toothpaste?”

“It was so sparkly...”, Mabel pouts, her mouth covered in toothpaste.

Soos arrives, running end with a look of excitement. “Hey, dudes, you'll never guess what I found!”

“Buried treasure!”, the twins say simultaneously before looking at each other, laughing.

“C’mon, follow me.”, Soos tells them, leading them to a mysterious door that’s been cut off. “So, I was cleaning up, when I found this secret door, hidden behind the wallpaper. It's crazy bonkers creepy! ” He unlocks the door and shows them what’s inside. They look around and see a collection of wax figures. But not any wax; these wax statues are historical figures, from Robin Hood to Shakespeare to Coolio.

Dipper shines his flashlight on the statues. “ Whoa. It's a secret wax museum.”

“They're so life-like.”, Mabel notes as she pokes the wax sculpture of Sherlock Holmes.

“Except for that one.”, Dipper critiques with his flashlight shining on a wax figure of Stan. Except it moves.

“Hello!”, Stan greets, making the twins scream and Soos. “It's just me, your Grunkle Stan!” His response doesn’t make it better because they still run out of the storage room, screaming their heads off.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

After regathering the Twins and Soos back into the room, Stan introduces his prize collection of wax figures, “Behold the Gravity Falls Wax Museum! It was one of our most popular attractions... before I forgot all about it”, he admits before showing off the individual statues. “I got 'em all! Genghis Khan, Sherlock Holmes….”, he pauses to see a statue of Larry King. “some kind of, I don't know, goblin man?”

Dipper shudders. “Is anyone else getting the creeps here?”

“And now for my personal favorite: Wax Abraham Lincoln, right over--”, he stops his sentence to see said statue melted in the summer sunlight.“Oh! Oh no! Come on, who left the blinds open? Wax John Wilkes Booth, I'm looking in your direction!” He bends down and puts his finger in wax, huffing in annoyance. "How do you fix a wax figure?”

"Cheer up, Grunkle Stan.", Mabel livens up her grunkle. "Where's that smile?" Stan grunts.

"Beep, bop, boop!", she cheerfully pokes Stan in the face, only to poke him in the eye. "Ow."

"Don't worry, Grunkle Stan.", the young Pine smiles. "I'll make you a new wax figure from all this old wax!"

“You really think you can make one of these puppies?”, Stan rises up. 

“Absolutely, Grunkle Stan! I'm an arts and crafts master. Why do you think I always have this glue gun stuck to my arm?”, she holds up her arm, which has a glue gun glued to it and tries to shake it off. “Eugh, eugh!” 

“Huh, I like your gumption, kid!”, Stan acknowledges with a grin

“I don't know what that word means, but thank you!”, Mabel gives one of her own.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Dipper’s been deeply invested into his journal. He just found a page talking about Methanosians, plant-like species that are able to emit flames. It’s very interesting to think about: how are they able to achieve this? Are they able to move so fast that they ignite the air or is it chemically triggered? Perhaps the chemical is-

“Dipper!”, Mabel drops down in front of his startled brother, who almost drops his journal before putting back in his jacket. 

“What do you think of my wax figure idea?”, she shows Dipper a drawing that she sketched in her sketch-book. “She's part fairy princess, and part horse fairy princess!”

“Maybe you should carve something from real life.”, Dipper suggests, feeling creeped out by her picture.

“How about a waffle with big arms?!”, Mabel turns another page, showing the aforementioned waffle.

“Okay... Or, you know, maybe, something else.”, Dipper clarifies, hoping to get his point across. “Like someone in your family.”

“Kids, have you seen my pants?”, Grunkle Stan asks as he poses on a briefcase, trying to find his piece of clothing. This makes Mabel gasps as a surge of inspiration courses into her mind. She turns around, her eyes becoming big as she looks upwards.

“Oh, muse. You work in mysterious ways.”, she beams with excitement.

“Why's your sister talking to the ceiling?”, Stan asks Dipper, clearly unaware of the young artist’s creative breakthrough. The next couple hours revolve around Mabel crafting the new wax figure. She works thoroughly on making the statue’s structure, working on the small details of her grunkle, and painting the right colors. It is rigorous and time consuming but she manages to get half way done. She moves back to admire her work with Dipper and Soos next to her. “I think... it needs more glitter.”, she muses.

“Agreed.”, Soos nods, handing the young Pine a bucket of glitter. She tosses the entire bucket onto the statue. “Perfect!”, Mabel exclaims in joy.

Stan walks in with his pants on but missing his shoes. “Ok, I found my pants but now I'm missing my--” He stops and notices Wax Stan. “Ahhh!” He falls over and crawls away in shock by witnessing the wax’s lifelike features. 

“What do you think?”, she asks, anxiously.

“I think... the Wax Museum's back in business!”

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

A bustling crowd has gathered at the Mystery Shack, they arrive in droves to see the latest attraction. What the attraction was, they don’t know but it must be worth the price of admission they paid to be here.

“I can't believe this many people showed up.”, Dipper comments as he watches the crowds arriving at the event.

“Yeah, I bet your uncle bribed them”, Wendy replies with a sarcastic grin. 

“He bribed me.”, he smiles, showing the 5 dollar bill that his Grunkle gave him in exchange for working in the ticket stand. She pulled out her own 5 dollar bill that conman bribed her with, making them both snicker. On stage, Stan walks on stage towards the podium. He taps on the microphone, ignoring the ear-piercing feedback it emits from the crowd. 

“You all know me, folks!”, Stan smiles, attempting and failing to charm the crowd. “Town darling, ‘Mr. Mystery.’ Please, ladies, control yourselves!” This garners no response from the women in the crowd. “As you know, I always bring the people of this fair town novelties and befuddlements, the likes of which the world has never known. But enough about me.”, Stan continues, getting to the point of the congregation. “Behold….me!” He removes the tarp, revealing the wax duplicate to the whole crowd. This receives a lukewarm welcome with two people clapping and another coughing. “And now a word from our own Mabelangelo!”, the conman introduces Mabel who takes the microphone from him before walking in front of the crowd.

“Thank you for coming!”, she greets the crowd. “I made this sculpture with my own two hands!” She throws up her arms into the air for a brief moment.  “It's covered in my blood, sweat, tears, and other fluids!” The implication makes the audience cringe in disgust.

“Yeah.”, she laughs it off. “I will now take questions! You there!” She points her hand to Old Man McGucket.

“Old Man McGucket, local kook.”, he introduces himself before asking. “Are the wax figures alive? And follow-up question, can I survive the wax-man uprising?”

“Um...Yes!”, she answers with a confused look on her face before pointing to a staunch man holding a turkey baster in his left hand instead of a microphone. “Next question!”

“Toby Determined, Gravity Falls Gossiper.”, he begins. “Do you really think this constitutes a wonder of the world?”

“Your microphone's a turkey baster, Toby.”, Stan shoots down his question.

“It certainly is…”, he retracts with a look of self-pity.

“Next question!”

“Shandra Jimenez, a real reporter.”, the female reporter says, holding a real microphone and a camera crew. “Your flyers promised free pizza with admission to this event. Is this true?” She holds up the said flyer in front him. This, in tow, makes the crowd erupt in indignation over the fact that there wasn’t any pizza around. Stan looks at the crowd with a nervous frown as they demand for pizza and glare at the conman.

“That was a typo.”, he gives a short answer, not really explaining anything. “Good night, everyone!” He drops a smoke bomb running off the stage before taking the admission cash box before anyone would notice. To say the crowd is upset would be an understatement, they are furious that they were swindled by the “Man of Mystery” as they all leave the Shack. No significant damage is caused save for the decorative pole that’s punched by Manly Dan.

Mabel leans on the admission table that Dipper and Wendy are sitting with a smile on her face. “I think that went well.”

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

“Hot pumpkin pie! Look at all this cash!” Stan smiles in pride as he counts the money in the evening. “And I owe it all to one person, this guy!” He points to his wax replica of himself to which Mabel punches her grunkle in the arm playfully.

“Yeah, you too, ya little gremlin.”, he laughs, giving her niece a noogie. “Now you kids wash up. We got another long day of racking cash tomorrow.” He starts pushing the twins out the living room. They head upstairs, smiling, as they run upstairs to brush their teeth and go to bed. Once they had gone upstairs, Stan decides to hang with his wax counterpart to watch Ducktective.

“Well, duck-tective, it seems you've really quacked the case.”, the constable jokes.

“Don't patronize me.”, Duck-tective quacks, clearly annoyed by the tasteless joke.

“Stupid duck!”, Stan can't help but laugh as the show goes to commercial. “Well, I'm gonna use the john. You need anything?” His wax counterpart’s grin doesn’t waver, but that doesn’t stop him from laughing. “I love this guy! Don't you go nowhere.”

He leaves to go to the bathroom for a few minutes. That’s all the time that’s needed for something sinister to occur. Like a thief in the night, the figure appears out of nowhere but their intention remains obvious and so, the terrible act is committed in such swift fashion that it’s almost like it never happened. The figure disappears as they hear the footsteps of Stan coming back into the den, leaving no trace.

When he comes back into the living room, Stan's face turns into horror as he screams as his eyes lay upon a devastating sight. “No!... No!... Noooooo!” His yells cause the twins to run downstairs to their grunkle on his knees with his hands holding his horrified face.

“Wax Stan! He's been...murdered!”, Stan points to the headless body of his wax counterpart on the floor. This shocking revelation makes Mabel faint with a gasp with Dipper catching her. While he isn't as emotionally torn about it like his sister and grunkle are about this, it’s still a scary sight to behold. 

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

An hour passed by, the cops arrived when Stan called. The living room is turned into a crime scene with Sheriff Blubs and Deputy Durland questioning Stan about what transpired. “So, I got up to use the john, right?”, he explains, even though he’s still shaken by seeing his wax counterpart beheaded. “And when I come back, blammo! He's headless!”

“My expert handcrafting... besmirched.”, Mabel cries dejectedly as she looks at her masterpiece beheaded.“Besmirched!” Dipper puts a comforting hand on his sister’s shoulder as he looks at the wax figure. The way the head is cleaved indicates that it wasn’t an accident. But one question remains in his mind. Who would do something like this?

“Look, we'd love to help you folks, but let's face the facts.”, Sheriff Blubs confesses after Durland finished taking notes on the murder. “This case is unsolvable.” Everyone, besides the cops, gasp incredulously. This makes Grunkle Stan very furious

“You take that back, Sheriff Blubs!”, Stan growls. 

“You're kidding, right? There must be evidence, motives. Anything.”, Dipper insists, there must be something that the police officers are missing to figure out the murder.“You know, I could help if you want.”

 “He's really good. He figured out who was eating our tin cans!”, Mabel vouches for her brother.

“All signs pointed to the goat.”, Dipper proudly declares.

“Yeah, yeah! Let the boy help.”, Stan adds on. “He's got a little brain up in his head.”

“Oooh! Would you look at what we got here!”, Sheriff Blubs taunts the young Pines, making him annoyed by the patronizing of the officers. “City boy thinks he's gonna solve a mystery with his fancy computer phone!”

“City boooy! City booooy!”, Durland eggs on with his partner. Blubbs just laughs on before smiling at the young  Pine, condescendingly. “You are adorable.”

“Adorable?”, Dipper pouts, aggravated by the patronizing cops, who just keep on laughing at him.

“Look, P.J.'s.”, Blubs begins, grinning at the aggravated Pine. “How about you leave the investigation to the grown-ups, okay?” Just as he said that, his walkie-talkie sounding off. Attention, all units. Steve is about to fit an entire cantaloupe in his mouth. Repeat, an entire cantaloupe!

“It's a 23-16!”, Durland squeals in excitement. 

“Let's move!” Blubs proclaims as both officers run off, laughing as they get to their car in quick fashion.

“That's it!”, Dipper declares, determined to prove those officers wrong. “Mabel, you and I are going to find the jerk who did this, and get back that head. Then we'll see who's adorable.”

“Aww, you sneeze like a kitten!”, Mabel gushes with a beaming grin, to which he glares at her for making him sound cute. It’s going to be a long process for him to get through in order for him to be taken seriously.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

The morning arrives and the Pine Twins begin their investigation. Dipper suggests finding clues in the last spot where the crime occured, which is the living room, where the wax statue still lays on the floor since last night. Mabel wraps the police tape, which is basically toilet paper with “Do Not Pass” in marker, as Dipper shoots a picture at the “corpse”.

“Wax Stan has lost his head”, Dipper explains in a tone reminiscent of a detective. “And it's up to us to find it.” He looks at the bulletin board with pictures of suspects. “There were a lot of unhappy customers at the unveiling and the murderer could be anyone of them.”

“Yeah! Even us!”, Mabel adds on.

“In this town, anything is possible.”, Dipper continues as he looks at the journal for some clues. “Ghosts, zombies, it could be months before we find our first clue”.

“Hey, look! A clue.” Dipper stops what he’s doing and looks at where Mabel’s pointing at. He walks to where she is and finds the first clue: shoeprints in the shag carpet. 

Mabel looks at the clue closely and notices something about them. “That's weird. They've got a hole in them.”  

“And they're leading to…”, Dipper stars before he and Mabel follow the trail to see their second clue: an ax behind the reclining chair. The twins look shocked at what they find. “The murder weapon!” He picks up the heavy axe and examines it.

“Who would know about this?”, Dipper thinks aloud.

“Maybe...”, Mabel thinks for a moment before getting a lightbulb. “Maybe we should ask Soos about this.”

Dippers hums before nodding his head.

They head to the gift shop to see Soos doing his usual tasks around the shack. After a few minutes of greeting the handyman, the Pine Twins explain what they’ve been doing and give him the murder weapon to inspect it.

“So, what do you think?”, Dipper asks, hoping Soos can give some additional clues. He keeps staring at the ax with the same analytical expression he had beforehand. 

“In my opinion, this is an ax.” Soos concludes, stating the obvious. 

“And is there anything else?”, Dipper asks, hoping to get an answer from the handyman. “Something weird? Something that can help us?”

“Uh...”, Soos thinks for a moment. “It’s sharp?” Dipper only sighs in minor annoyance. 

“Wait a minute.”, Mabel snaps her fingers. “The lumberjack!”

Dipper realizes for a second. “Yeah, that’s right. He was furious when he didn't get that free pizza.”

“Furious enough, for murder!”, Mabel adds on dramatically.

 “Oh, you mean Manly Dan?”, Soos clarifies the lumberjack’s identity. “Yeah, he hangs out at this crazy intense biker joint downtown.”

 “Then that's where we're going.”, Mabel declares with a fist pump.

“Dude, this is awesome.”, Soos chuckles, sharing some of Mabel’s excitement. “You two are like: The Mystery Twins!”

Dipper frowns at the name the handyman offered. “Don't call us that.”

After getting the information they needed, the Pine Twins walk outside about to the downtown area to where the biker joint. Before they reach it, Dipper and Mabel see their grunkle pulling a coffin out the trunk of his car. “Hey, give me a hand with this coffin, will ya?”, Stan asks. “I'm doin' a memorial service for wax Stan. Something small, but classy.”

“Sorry, Grunkle Stan.”, Dipper apologizes. “But we have got a big break in the case!”

“Break in the case!”, Mabel echoes. 

“We're heading to the town right now to interrogate the murderer.”

“And we have an axe!”, Mabel shows off the axe, waving it a bit with a gaudy smile.

“Hm, seems like the kind of thing that responsible parents wouldn't want you to do…”, Stan thinks for a moment. “Good thing I'm an uncle. Avenge me kids! AVENGE ME!!”

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Skull Fracture is the only biker bar of Gravity Falls, fitting for the most masculine of individuals to hangout. The outer appearance is enough for the normal person to steer clear from, especially with the large bouncer at the front. It’s why Dipper and Mabel are peering around the corner of the tavern, measuring the difficulty of their current situation. 

“This is the place.” Dipper examines, still feeling a bit nervous on getting caught. He turns his head to Mabel. “Got the fake IDs?” She gives him an ID card for him, but he’s not sure that this would work because the card looks hooky at best. It’s made by unlamented cardstock along with crayons and glitter.

“Is this the best you can make, Mabel?”, he asks, still looking at the ID with uncertainty. 

“C’mon, Dipper.”, Mabel pouts. “It’s gonna work.”

“Here goes nothing.”, the young Pine sighs, bracing himself for the worst as they both head to the front of the tavern's entrance, where the bouncer is standing.

“We're here to interrogate Manly Dan, the lumber jack for the murder of wax Stan.”, Mabel speaks with a level of professionalism that it’s a bit jarring.  “I believe our ID’s can provide proof for you, good sir.” They present their ID’s to the bouncer who stares at them, before shrugging.

“Works for me.”, he responds stoically as he opens the door, though Dipper is a little surprised that it worked. As they head inside, they understand why this tavern is called Skull Fracture. Men are either throwing fists at each other, arguing with each other, smoking, or sitting at the bar drinking some beer. Dipper and Mabel walk inside, looking around before motioning for his sister to follow him.

Mabel almost trips over an unconscious body and steps over it. She stops at a moment to stare at the body. “He's resting.”, she reassures to herself before catching up with her brother, who looks around and finds Manly Dan at the arm wrestling machine.

“Alright, let's just try to blend in, ok?”, Dipper asks as he heads towards the lumberjack. “I’m going to interrogate the suspect.”

Mabel gives him a thumbs-up before climbing onto a chair and talks to one of the patrons. “Hey there, fellow restaurant patron!”, she greets the gritty man with a cheery tone before patting him on the arm, ignoring his growl of aggravation. Dipper, meanwhile, passes through the patrons before reaching Manly Dan.

“Manly Dan, just the guy I wanted to see.”, Dipper speaks with nonchalance. “Where were you last night?”

“Punchin' the clock.”, Manly Dan grunts, holding on to the mechanical arm with veins popping. 

“Oh, so you were at work?”

“No, I was punchin' that clock!”, Manly Dan growls as he points to a broken clock outside, which appears broken and at an odd angle.

“10 o'clock, the time of the murder.”, Dipper hums, looking at the time on the broken clock, which is at 10, in consternation.“So, I guess you've never seen this before?” He pulls out the axe from his bag and shows it to the lumberjack.

 “Listen, little girl!” Manly Dan starts.

“Hey, actually I'm a--”

“I wouldn't pick my teeth with that ax. It's left handed! I only use my right hand, the MANLY HAND!!”, Manly Dan rips the machine's arm off and beats the machine with it.

Dipper looks at the axe. “Left handed.” He decides to go and catch his sister before they both head outside to assess what he learned.

“It's a left handed ax.” Dipper confirms as he shows Mabel a list of possible suspects from Stan’s unveiling. “These are all our suspects. Manly Dan is right handed, that means all we have to do is find our left handed suspect and we've got our killer.”

 “Oh man, we are on fire today!” Mabel exclaims with a lot of zeal.

“That we are.”, he responds, feeling some of her excited energy. “Now let's find that murderer.” He shares Mabel’s look of confidence as they share a fist bump. They start out looking around town to find their ideal suspects: they first start at the junkyard, where they see Old Man McGucket wrestling with a baby alligator. Mabel waves and the old kook waves  back with his right hand with the baby gator biting on it. Afterwards, Dipper, wearing a fake mustache,  delivers a package to Pizza Guy's house. Pizza Man signs Dipper's form and gets excited, only for Dipper to take the package and leave. On the other side of the road, Mabel notices the angry lady  and whistles to get her attention before throwing a baseball at her. She catches it with her right hand and crushes it. Later on, the twins find another suspect who was at the unveiling. They knock on his door, only for him to  come out with both hands in casts. So far most the people on the list were all right-handed. It seems like they aren’t close at all.

Except for one suspect.

Dipper gasps as looks for the final suspect on the list. “Mabel, there's only one person left on this list.”

 “Of course, it all adds up!”, Mabel realizes as well.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

It's nightfall as the cops and the Pine Twins head to the front door of Gravity Falls Gossiper. It took some convincing but Dipper were able to convince them that their number one suspect was responsible for the murder.

"You kids better be right about this or you'll never get the end of it.", Blubs warns them, hoping to be right so he could tease the city boy.

“The evidence is irrefutable, officers.”, Dipper responds.

“It's so irrefutable.” Mabel adds, waving her hand.

“I'm gonna get to use my match stick!”, Durland giggles in excitement as he waves his batton around.

“You ready? You ready little fella?”, Blubs askes, sharing his partner’s zealous energy as they hit each other playfully with batons, barely able to contain themselves.

“On 3!”, Dipper starts, before counting. “1, 2…” 

Before he can finish, the officers break down the door, barging in with a unified shout with the Pine Twins behind them. “Nobody move!”, Blubs shouts with authority. “This is a raid!”

As his office gets invaded, Toby slips and falls down, yelling in surprise. “What is this? Some kind of raid?”, he asks needlessly.

“Toby Determined, you're under arrest for murder of the wax body of Grunkle Stan.”, Dipper declares confidently.

“You have the right to remain impressed with our awesome detective work.”, Mabel adds on, smugly grinning as she high fives Dipper.

“Gobbling goose feathers! I don't understand!”, Toby exclaims, flustered by what’s going on.

“Then allow me to explain.”, Dipper starts with a confident smile on his face as Mabel holds a newspaper with a picture of Wax Stan's head. “You were hoping that Grunkle Stan's new attraction would be the story that saved your failing newspaper. But when the show was a flop, you decided to go out and make your own headline. But you were sloppy, and all the clues pointed to a shabby shoed reporter who was caught left handed.”

“Toby Determined, you're yesterday's news.”, Mabel concludes as she crumples up the newspaper.

Toby Boy, your little knees must be sore…”, the journalist starts, frowning. “From jumping to conclusions.” He finishes his proud remark before doing a little dance at the kids detective work. “I had nothing to do with that murder.”

“HA! I knew it-wait, come again?”, Dipper exclaims before realizing what he just said. “Nothing? D-did you just  say nothing?” He’s genuinely confused about what Toby just said. How could he not be the suspect when all of the evidence points to him?

“Huh? What? Could you repeat that?”, Mabel asks, sharing her brother’s confusion.

“Then where were you at the night of the break-in?”, Blubs asks, wanting to know the truth as well as Deputy Durland.

 “Ehh…”, Toby tugs on his shirt collar nervously before inserting a tape into a TV. It opens with him looking around, hoping no would notice what he’s doing before taking a cardboard cutout of Shandra Jimenez out of his closet. “Finally, we can be alone, cardboard cutout of TV news reporter Shandra Jimenez!”, he swoons affectionately before he kisses it, making everyone cringe in disgust from what they’re witnessing.

“Welp, timestamp confirms it.”, Blubs concludes. “Toby, you're off the hook. You freak of nature.”

“Hooray!”, Toby cheers, even though the tape is still playing.

“But, but it has to be him!”, Dipper argues, hoping that his hard work doesn’t end in failure.“Check the ax for fingerprints!”

The cops do so, dusting the weapon for any fingerprints, except there isn’t any on it. “Sorry, kid”, Sheriff Blubs shook his head. “No prints at all.”

“No prints?”, Dipper is confused by what he’s heard. There’s no prints on the ax?

Durland “Hey I got a headline for you: city kids waste everyone's time.”, taunts making the adults laugh, making Dipper and Mabel feel more embarrassed than they already are. They put so much effort into finding the culprit and from what they gathered, it seemed like the evidence was pointing to Toby Determined. But, they were wrong.  It feels like the case itself is unsolvable.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Later on today, Grunkle Stan arranges a funeral for his wax counterpart in the parlor. He is standing on a stage with a bunch of chairs set up with Dipper, Mabel, Soos, and the wax figures as the audience.

“Kids, Soos, lifeless wax figures, thank you all for coming.”, Stan thanks, solemnly before continuing. “Some people might say it's wrong for a man to love a wax replica of himself.”

“They're wrong!”, Soos exclaims as he stands up.

“Easy Soos.”, Stan responds, he understands the handyman’s sentiments. He looks at his headless wax replica, feeling a sob coming up as he continues. “Wax Stan, I hope you're picking pockets in wax heaven.” The conman sniffles, wiping his eye. “I'm sorry, I got glitter in my eye!” He runs out, not able to finish the eulogy without feeling grief.

“Ohhhhh duuuude…”, Soos cries out as he runs after his, trying to console him. There’s nothing but silence as it’s just the Pine Twins and the wax figures left in attendance. Dipper and Mabel look solemnly at the casket the headless Wax Stan is in, reminding them of their failure at finding the murderer. This realization makes Dipper slump into his seat, sighing.

“Those cops are right about me. About us.”, Dipper mutters in disappointment and defeat.

“But Dipper, we've come so far, we can't give up now.”, Mabel encourages as she gives her brother a smile.

 “Mabel, we’ve considered everything: the weapon, the motive, the clues.”, he insists as he stands up and walks to the coffin. “We looked at every perspective and there was nothing but dead ends.” When the case first started, Dipper thought he and Mabel could solve this easily. They had the clues, the potential candidates for the murderer, and the solid idea for a motive of the murder. But now, he’s not so sure anymore and can’t reach any conclusion. There are too many loose ends to this mystery.

That is until he notices something, something he didn’t see during their investigation. “That’s weird”, Dipper notes, as he stares at the wax rendition’s shoes. “Wax Stan's shoe has a hole in it.”

“Well, yeah. All the wax guys have that.”, Mabel answers, following her brother to the casket with the ax in her hand. “It's where the pole thingy attaches to their stand dealy.”

“Wait a minute, what has a hole on its shoe and no fingerprints?”, Dipper mutters to himself. He slowly realizes something. Despite the fact that his previous suspect had a hole in his shoe along with being left handed. But there’s an additional piece of evidence that’s to be considered: There’s no fingerprints. And there's someone or, something, that has none.

“Uh...Dipper”, Mabel asks, confused by her brother’s silence.

“Mabel.”, Dipper starts as he looks at his sister. “The murderers are--”

“Standing right behind you?”

The Pine Twins gasp in surprise as they turn around and see something that defies logic: all the wax figures rise up, either scowling with hatred or smiling in malicious intent as they creeped closer towards the stunned children until they’re blocked off from any escape. The lineup of wax figures include Shakespeare, Edgar Allen Poe, Genghis Khan, Larry King, Coolio (?), and Sherlock Holmes, who is holding up the decapitated head of Wax Stan. A wax replica of Lizzie Borden takes the ax from a terrified mabel before Wax Sherlock begins.

“Congratulations, my two amuetur slueths”, he patronizes as he tosses Wax Stan’s head up and down like a ball. “You've discovered our little secret.” He turns towards his wax comrades, who sneer at the Pine Twins. “Applaud, everyone. Applaud sarcastically.”

The wax figures collectively do so, mocking the children with sneers etched onto their faces, but Sherlock admonishes him. “Uh, no, that sounds too sincere. Slow clap, please.” The figures slow down their clapping so it may appear prominently more sarcastic. “There we go. Nice and condescending.”

“H-how is this possible?”, Dipper asks, baffled by what’s going on. “You're made of wax.”

“Are you magic”, Mabel gasp, curiously.

“Are we magic?” Wax Sherlock laughs with a sneer. “She wants to know if we're magic!” He keeps chuckling before slamming his fist down on the casket, jolting Dipper and Mabel. “We're CURSED!”

“CURSED!”, the wax figures repeat.

“Cursed to come to life whenever the moon is waxing.”, Wax Sherlock explains, walking near the fireplace.“Your uncle bought us many years ago at a garage sale.” 

“A haunted garage sale, son!”, Wax Coolio adds.

“Quite.”, Wax Sherlock agrees before continuing. “And so, the Mystery Shack Wax Collection was born. By day, we would be the playthings of man.”

“But when your uncle went to sleep, we would rule the night.”, Wax Coolio interjects again.

“It was a charmed life for us cursed beings…”, Wax Sherlock speaks, with a tone of reminiscent before turning cold.  “That is, until your uncle closed up shop. We've been waiting ten years to get our revenge on Stan for locking us away. But we got the wrong guy.”

“So you were going to kill Grunkle Stan for real”, Dipper asks, completely shocked by what he’s heard.

“You were right, Dipper.”, Mabel says. “Wax figures are creepy.”

“Enough!”, Wax Sherlock silences them. “Now that you know our secret, you must die.” Wax Sherlock, along with the rest of the wax figures, rolls his eyes to the back of his head. The wax figures growl intimidatingly as they get closer to the Pine Twins.

Mabel looks at her brother, who activates the Omnitrix. Dipper tries to select the right alien as the wax figures get close while Mabel attempts to distract them by throwing items from the small refreshment table. It does little to no effect before she throws a pot of coffee at the face of Wax Genghis Khan, who screams in pain.

“That’s it. We can melt them with hot, melty things”, Mabel realizes.

“Hot, melty things”, Dipper repeats before an idea pops up into his head. “That’s it!” He turns the dial to get his designated alien. In a flash of emerald light, stunning Mabel and the wax statues, Dipper’s body begins to morph: He feels his body developing chlorophyll as his feet become roots, his oxygen molecules shift to methane, easy for ignition. His shoulders develop red flowers.

Dipper becomes a Methonisian: a humanoid, plant-like alien that has an overall green and black colored body, mostly with a red flame-patterned head and root-like feet, seemingly holding black rocks. His eyes are oval-shaped with points at each end with pupils copying the shape but are smaller. Also, his shoulders and head have red petals and his elbows and legs have green frills sticking out. This alien is taller than an average human and has a distinct rotten stench that worsens with heat.

“Swampfire!”, the altered Pine shouts. Mabel looks at her brother in awe, he finds a new transformation that looks very cool but she notices something when she smells him.

“Ugh. Dipper you stink.”, Mabel holds her nose in disgust.

“That’s because my body is emitting methane fumes.”, Swapfire answers.

“Just take a shower when this is over.”, she begs as she grabs two decorative candles.

“The stink would probably go away when I transform back but okay.”, he answers, igniting his fists which causes the wax figures to step back even further. “Any one of you moves and we'll melt you!”

“With some fire and decorative candles!”, Mabel declares.

“Do you really think you could beat us with candles and by becoming a giant flaming weed?”, Wax Sherlock asks, his tone incredulous at the idea of these kids defeating despite them having the advantage.

“I mean….I can make flames outta my hands and she's got candles. So...”, Swampfire shrugs. 

“Yeah, it’s kind off a no-brainer.”, Mabel points out.

“So be it.”, Wax Sherlock answers before shouting. “ATTACK!” The wax figures and the Pine Twins charge, ready for battle.

Wax Lizzie Borden swings her ax at Mabel, but accidentally decapitates Wax Robin Hood. Mabel walks around her, but Wax Shakespeare sneaks up behind her. Mabel cuts off his hands with both candles, and he runs away in cowardice. Wax Shakespeare's hands, however,  move and begin strangling Mabel. She grabs a door and repeatedly smashes it on its fingers.

A couple of wax figures tackle Swampfire to the ground before dogpiling him, but since he has the strength advantage, he’s able to get them off of him through powering out, making the wax figures fly across the room in different directions. After doing that, he avoids being grabbed from behind by Wax Larry King before delivering a fiery chop that decapitates his head. “Interview this, Larry King!”

“My neck! My beautiful neck!”, Wax Larry King cries out, running away.

Wax Groucho growls as he charges towards Swampfire, but the altered Pine is ready as he blasts the wax figure in his stomach with a massive fireball causing both halves to slowly slip off.

“Jokes on you, Groucho!”, Swampfire quips.

“I heard of an empty stomach but this is ridiculous.”, Wax twiddling his fingers a bit as the top half of his body slid off of the lower half. “Hey, why is there nothing in my hand?”

Swampfire turns around to see Wax Genghis Khan charging at him and simply sidesteps him, making the wax figure run into the fireplace.

“Ha, Genghis Khan! You fell harder than the... uh... ”, Swampfire declares before getting confused. “I don't know, uh, Jin Dynasty? Heh. Yeah. Alright. ”

Mabel swings around Wax Coolio's head while getting overwhelmed by wax figures.

“Dipper! Watch out!”, Mabel calls out to her transformed brother. He blasts Wax Richard Nixon out the room before turning around to Wax Sherlock Holmes behind him.

“Alright. Let’s get this taken care of.”, Wax Sherlock says, putting Wax Stan's head on the horn of a rhino on the wall, and grabs a sword hanging on it. He then swings the blade and it slices Swampfire’s off. The wax figure seems pleased before his eyes narrow in annoyance and confusion as the altered Pine grows another arm. Swampfire ignites his fists and starts swinging at Wax Sherlock, who in turn uses the sword defensively while delivering more hits to the alien. This continues until they reach the attic.

"Once your family is out of the way, we’ll rule the night once more!", Wax Sherlock declares, raising his sword planning to slice Swampfire’s head clean off.

I can't deliver a massive fire attack in this area, Swampfire thinks. The best course is….He quickly turns to see the window. There!

"Don’t count on it!", Swampfire retorts, kicking Wax Sherlock down the stairs before opening the window to get outside. He climbs up to the top sign of the Mystery Shack and waits near the edge to hear Wax Sherlock Holmes coming up to finish him off.

"You think you can outwit me, freak?!", Wax Sherlock asks in aggravation as the figure climbs up. "I’m Sherlock Bloody Holmes!" He looks ready to slice up the alien boy until he reaches the top sign. But he realizes his mistake as Swampfire holds both hands out to deliver an attack.

“Burn.”, Swampfire declares before blasting a stream of flames that seems to have melted the wax figure. He moves forward to the spot where Wax Sherlock was standing. He looks from his left and his right, hoping to find any evidence that he melted the wax figure. Honestly, where did he-

Out of nowhere, Wax Sherlock appears between the top and bottom sign to deliver a hard elbow strike to Swampfire’s face. This causes him to tumble on the other side of the roof, rolling on the surface and grabbing onto the edge of it to prevent himself from falling down. He looks down at the ground below before gulping, he knows that these aliens are tough but he still doesn't feel comfortable at the aspect of falling. 

The sudden sound of scraping alerts the altered Pine to see Wax Sherlock Holmes, despite having one arm that’s mostly melted off, brandishing the sword with a hateful scowl on his face. He stops on top of the chimney and for additional cruelty, steps on Swampfire’s hands, eliciting a grunt of pain from him.

“Any last requests”, Wax Sherlock asks as he holds the sword, ready to finish the job of killing this freak.

Swampfire turns his head slightly to see the sky brightening up a bit, making him have a small grin of victory. “You got any sunscreen?”

“Sunscree-?”, Wax Sherlock looks confused before he realizes his hand is melting. “What?!” He gasps in horror at the sight of the warm, summer sun rising up.

“No.”, Wax Sherlock says placidly, despite his wax body melting in the heat.

“Yeah, it really wasn’t very sharp of you to let me lead you out here.”, Swampfire replies, confidently.

“Outsmarted by a child in short pants! No!”, Wax Sherlock exclaims in frustration and agony as the sun reaches even higher. “Fiddlesticks! Humbugs! Tiiter, total kerfuffle. Butter hallabaloo.” He continues cursing until he becomes a puddle with only his head holding some shape. Swampfire climbs up on the roof before sighing in relief. A certain ring from the Omnitrix emblem on his indicates that he’s going to turn back and in a flash of red light, Dipper becomes normal again.

“Case closed.”, Dipper declares in satisfaction, wiping the dust from his hands before he sneezes.

“You sneeze like a kitten!”, Wax Sherlock laughs, mockingly as his remains slip off the roof. “Those policemen were right, you're adorable! Adorable!” He declares his final word before falling down at the ground below in a splat.

“Ew.”, Dipper mutters in disgust.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Just as the battle on the roof is finished, so is Mabel’s in the parlor as she scoops all the remaining pieces of the wax figures with one more, Wax William Shakespeare’s living head.

“Though our group be left in twain, the men of wax shall rise again!”, Wax William declares though it reaches deaf ears as Mabel picks him up.

“Y’know any limericks?”, she asks curiously.

“Uh... there once was a dude from Kentucky…”, the wax figure attempts, weakly.

“Nope!”, Mabel concludes throwing his head into the fire before noticing her brother entering the parlor. “Dipper! You're okay! You solved the mystery after all.”

“I couldn't have done it without my sidekick.”, he says as he pulls up a chair and takes Wax Stan's head off the wall. 

“No offense Dipper, but you're the sidekick.” Mabel informs him. 

“What? Says who? Have people been saying that? Have you heard that?”, Dipper asks nervously before coming down.

“Eesh, which one of you broke wind-”, Stan comes into the parlor before screaming incredulously. “Hot Belgian Waffles!! What happened to my parlor?!” He sees the room cluttered with various wax parts on the floor.

“Your wax figures turned out to be evil, so we fought them to the death!”, Mabel answers, jovially.

“I decapitated Larry King.”, Dipper adds.

Stan stares at them for a minute before laughing at their ridiculous claim. “Ha ha! You kids and your imaginations!”

“On the bright side, though, look what we found.”, Dipper shows his grunkle’s wax replica’s head.

“My head! Ha ha! I missed this guy!”, Grunkle Stan beams happily. “You done good, kids! Alright, line up for some affectionate noogie-ing.” Dipper and Mabel try to protest but he just noogies them, all of them sharing a big laugh before a police car drives near the broken parlor window, Sheriff Blubs and Deputy Durland on the inside relaxing.

“Solved the case yet, boy?”, Sheriff Blubs asks, condescendingly. “ I'm so confident you're gonna say no, that I'm gonna take a long, slow sip from my cup of coffee.” He holds up his coffee and starts drinking really slowly to mock the Omnitrix-user.

“Actually, the answer is yes.”, Dipper answers, casually as he holds Wax Stan’s head. This causes Sheriff Blubs to choke on his coffee before spitting it in Durlands face, which leads to him screaming in pain and spitting the coffee back at Blubs’ face, making him scream in pain . This continues on until the drive away in pain from the scalding coffee before ending up crashing.

The Pines laugh at the spectacle, enjoying the catharsis of solving the case. “They got scalded.”, Stan quibs, chuckling.

“So, did you get rid of all the wax figures?” Dipper asks.

“I am ninety-nine percent sure that I did!”, Mabel answers with a confident grin.

“Good enough for me!”, Dipper concludes.

Little does she know, Mabel missed one. A headless Wax Larry King chuckles before chasing off after a rat that steals his ear.