#myself more... its fine... im used to this.. i so used to being everyone elses sound board and thats fine its okay.

[pumpkinnning]

this really does not feel like the kind of statement to throw out there without any sense of context or place. there's definitely sth to be said about how women are taught to live in a constant state of preyhood by overwhelming societal messaging - and yeah it's also people's responsibility to see past that but "self victimization" feels kind of umm. a shitty way to describe it. are you gonna tell minorities who have internalized shitty cliches about themselves they're self victimizing ?

also yeah there are A LOT of places on earth where these kinds of fears are at least a little warranted. personally i grew up in a place where i was sexually harassed very regularly by grown men in the street starting age 10. and not just the whistling and creepy petnames, im talking graphic descriptions. a random guy once told me he was going to put out his cigarette in my eye bc i didn't smile back. when i started going on there was a notorious rapist operating in the same area as the popular clubs. one of my friends got her life completely ruined by a stalker and nobody did anything when he would just hang out in front of her door with a baseball bat for hours every other day. etc etc i could go on for a long time. and yeah sure i didn't actually get physically harmed but that kind of psychological violence takes a toll. and i tried not to let it make me too afraid i still pushed myself to go out and walk in the woods at night and go out alone. but that didn't mean i then turned around and called my friends weak and crazy for being scared. i am older now less vulnerable and i moved to another country and it barely happens anymore and i feel so much freer and safer and that still does not mean im gonna go call women who do experience this shit crazy online

again. absolutely we have to look at the way female victimhood is constructed in a way that plays into racism, classism, transphobia, etc. this kind of post however, which i have been seeing more and more of, does not sound like that. it sounds like misogyny using woke terms, and victim blaming, and "haha if it hasn't happened to me it can't be true and everyone else must be making it up" and "why don't [marginalized group] simply stop whining about their oppression and suck it up and pretend its not happening and everything will be fine. if you're impacted by it it's actually your own fault" and just very very privileged.

i'm sorry the self-victimization of some women i see online is crazyyyyy, they're saying shit like "yeah being a woman is so crazy, if you go on a date you have to text his full name and picture to your friend, and also where you're meeting, and share your location throughout the date, and check in hourly" girl the only safety measure you need is meeting in a populated place. that man is NOT going to kidnap you from Popular Cafe on Well-Frequented Street in broad daylight at 2pm. i promise. do you go forest hiking as a first date or what the fuck.

[toytulini]

man the thing about beauty standards and being ugly and being pretty and being insecure is that ultimately you do just kinda have to Decide that youre pretty. like ultimately thats how you become pretty, or hot, or sexy. you have to just Decide that you Are. you have to recognize that its made up, its arbitrary, its subjective, and that people might disagree with you about it, and as much as you are able, you need to completely and utterly disregard their opinions on your appearance, and decide that youre pretty now. and THEN.

you need to find beauty in "ugly". you need to recognize that ugly is made up, that its arbitrary, that its subjective, and you need to be able to find the beauty in it all. and this means you cant bodyshame people. you cant body shame shitty celebs or politicians. you need to base your criticisms on the substance of their character and misdeeds and unhinged horrific opinions and not give a shit about what they look like. you cant go calling people ugly for being shitty. you cant go calling people ugly for looking A Way You Dont Like.

and then if you wanna really galaxy brain this shit you start using ugly as endearment. OBVIOUSLY do not fucking call other human beings ugly. that shit is far too loaded, its just Rude. Dont call specific features of people or even characters ugly cos thats also too loaded. as a term it has baggage. but you can see the ugly in tacky, loud, garish clothing, and it can be Good. you can see the ugly in a distinctive, horrible tiny car from the 90s, and it can be good. you can see the ugly in animals that have evolved to look the way they do, without a single thought of what humans find appealing. you can see the beauty and the freedom in "Ugliness". you can break out of this shit altogether and feel nothing but disdain for anyone who stoops to insulting your appearance if they disagree with you about shit. you can get completely out of the cave of these beauty standards. you can find it so freeing to revel.in letting yourself be ugly. in recognizing that the way you look and exist might be ugly to some people, and youre out of the cave enough to simply recognize. thats just your opinion and it doesnt matter. didnt ask.

you can look at ppl arguing about the correct amount of skincare products to use daily, the Correct Amount of makeup, and whether or not its radical to conform to beauty standards or defy them and argue about is it really conforming if visible makeup pisses men off, and you can say, well I dont care about any of that, I recognize the societal pressures of flawless skin and all that but you see,

I just want to look like a silly little clown :o3

[atomiclace]

who knew that some agere people would be the worst type of people to exist (talking about you spinny)

[muttsona]

i hope i die, you broke my heart

[nomairuins]

aww its kinda cute finding me complaining abt my dads whole lisa thing from 2017. honestly so overshadowed by everything else and also i was so annoying when i was 12 aw .

[phagodyke]

I SEE PEOPLE ON THE FLOOR SLIDE INTO THE SEA CANT STAY HERE ANYMORE WE'RE TURNING INTO FIENDS IF I STAY HERE TROUBLE WILL FIND ME IF I STAY HERE ILL NEVER LEAVE..... ‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️

[mngo-jii]

☆ 𝐝𝐚𝐧𝐢𝐞𝐥 𝐩𝐚𝐠𝐞 (𝐡𝐩 𝐦𝐚𝐠𝐢𝐜 𝐚𝐰𝐚𝐤𝐞𝐧𝐞𝐝) 𝐱 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫 CRUSHING HEADCANONS ! 🐚

✉️ : i guess ill write it myself then (p.s. i havent written in MONTHS but you have NO right to tell me this sucks because this is the most you can get for hpma x reader 😠 /j) I'm open to requests, I'm bored

Daniel Page, who accidentally messes up his potion from staring at you too hard—who, on the other hand, was too fixated and focused on trying to help him ferment the mixture with what he had teached you so far.

Daniel Page, who constantly, indirectly calls you pretty.

Lottie had asked for advice on who she should draw to practice anatomy on, adding that it should be someone who has relatively pretty features so it won't be too hard to captivate. On the spur of the moment, Daniel was the one who almost immediately responded with your name.

Daniel Page, who always offers to help you study for exams, of course without a remark on how you "always need him" first.

Daniel Page, who ironically always needs you, and goes to you for help even though everyone else is a 100% available and a lot more suitable for the situation.

Daniel Page, who's slowly getting used to sneaking out at night with you to explore Hogwarts even further. To the point he could almost feel a pang of disappointment when you decide not to go.

"Alright," he speaks through his usual accent, "It's better not to get hung up by Mr. Filch anyway." He wishes you a goodnight after you do and tries to ignore the way his shoulders slump and how his mood lightly drops.

Daniel Page, who randomly gets reminded of how pretty you are despite the light frown you have displayed on your face as a result of whatever he said.

Additionally, Daniel Page who can't help but halt his speech when he realises how pretty your pout looks and the way you sassily cross your arms at him, so out of patience yet ready to hear him out. Hence why he always ends up "reluctantly" complying with your plan instead of his.

Daniel Page who covers up the fact that he wants you to dance with him "as a favor."

Daniel Page who gives you a flower because it was an "extra herb" he didn't need (even though he could have kept it for the next potion that acquired it), and makes up an entire potion when you asked what it was used for.

Daniel Page who suddenly distances himself from you when you start hanging out with another male student—

Daniel Page who says it was he who was "your first" and who has been on adventures with you more than anyone else and asks what's so special about said male student once you worriedly ask him what's going on

Daniel Page who's stuttering, awful lying, and flushed face never fail to give him away every time the others question him about you

Daniel Page who looks like a beaten-up puppy whenever you choose someone else over him. Notwithstanding it might be the smallest matter as to accompanying you to go back to your dorm to pick up something you forgot ☠️

Daniel Page who starts to stammer and sweat when you ask his opinion on how a certain outfit, accessory, or makeup looks on you— His response either being "It-it looks fine" or "uhhh um 🧍🏻‍♂️"

Daniel Page who feels guilty about the lack of solid answer he had given you, not to mention the pout on your face once you back away.

So he apologises afterward and straight up tells you that you're always pretty, and that he doesn't understand why you need to be told that when you'll always be the same or even prettier in anything you wear 🤷🏻...

Daniel Page who goes blank when he realises what he had just said ☹️

Just Daniel Daniel Daniel Daniel <3 he's a cutie patootie fr

a/n: GOD I ACTUALLY DON'T LIKE THIS ITS THE BEST I COULD DO IM SORRY

[cqaeluvs]

Hello can I ask for head canons for Trey/Sebek/Kalim confessing to male!reader after finding out that someone else had confessed to him? Thank you for your time!

A single book with an open page on a table had caught your attention, what story would you go on?.

Ahh! omgg anon this is such a cute resquest!, ill try my best to write them as good as i can (´▽`ʃ♡ƪ).

Now it was asked for a male reader, but it stayed neutral, i hope its fine anon! my partner also helped because i got stuck on kalim

(Reader can be interpreted as yuu or not.)

-- Now Trey was walking through the school, looking for you as he just had finish a small bag of freshly baked treats for you.

-- He couldn't help but overheard the certain confession his crush was getting he was very shocked but decided to leave, silently begging that you didn't accept the sugarcoated words of some guy.

-- Onto the end of the day, he made sure to make himself a bit more presentable, he asked you if you can accompany him to a certain place (this being were he is gonna confess), as he slowly turned around he was still very nervous, but it was now or never.

He cleared his throat as he looking at you nervously. "M/n, you are quite the charmer aren't you?, putting me and other people under some sort of love spell of yours. And if you let me, will you allow me and myself only to be the only one that who can wipe your tears away?" he said as you can see that there was an obvious blush across his face. After that he extended his hand to give you the bag that he's been holding onto from earlier. Inside, it was a treats that he already baked this same morning.

-- Kalim was doing his daily stuff (blinding everyone with such shine) and he happend to find across certain confession to his crush.

-- Now i don't believe kalim would be a 'jealous' type, but an oblivious type, so he would just straight up go and hug you by your back and give you a short squeeze interrumpting the confession without a single clue.

-- Kalim didn't undertanded why suddenly the other person left,but since your attention was on him now, he let you go and grabbed you by the wrist to his dormitory to celebrate something you didn't quite heard.

"Come on M/n-kun, we can have lots of fun when we reach the longue, i promise!" he exclaim while holding onto your wrist. Before you could say a word, he spoke again. "But promise me, this is only for the two of us, just the two of us, alright?" he said as he let go of your wrist before firmly grabbing your arm and pulling you more closer to him. "I can feed you all the food that you want, and im gonna hold onto your hand for the rest of our life, or even better to hold you for the rest of my whole life! isn't that sound amazing? just you and me!".

-- Shock. Pure shock.

-- Now what would our dear sebek do if he found out his crush getting asked out? many would say scream, which is right, but what if he wants his crush to admire him?.

-- Sebek was planing to confess himself to you this day,now he is not letting some low human get his human first, so he went straight to the point.

"HUMAN! I have been looking for you the whole day! Mmh? what is this?" Sebek knew what was happening but he needed to make sure, so he can properly humiliate such human. "That doesn't matter right now!" He cleared his throat and you could see the tip of his ear turn red. "So human, Malleus-sama has been waiting for you, and the only person who is worthy of walking by your side besides Malleus-sama is me! So allow me to take you there safely, and you need to look pretty, like you always do".

[electricsynthesis]

im not going to say its bad characterization or anything because ultimately my willful misinterpretation of canon isnt any more or less valid than anyone else's, particularly in this fandom, but i am so often left wondering to myself about like, is the fact that lance is a dick not what's likable about lance? is that not the fun? like he's insecure, of course, but hes a peacock. like a bird puffing his feathers up big to scare off predators. its all fake but its still all there. so often i read fics where lance is just cheerful or silly and excitable. and im like. is him being an asshole not the point ?!?

its really affected by canon of course. because vld is really irritatingly derivative of the surface level elements of atla, without any of the deeper writing work being done in atla, so lance is just sokka, but they wouldnt make him a misogynist because thats too complex of an arc so they just made him a flirt instead. and then he was sad. and everyone was mean to him. and then his girlfriend died. and now hes just SAD? thats his one character trait ? hes fucking sad? do they not see the wealth of directions they couldve taken lance??

you know what team voltron doesnt have? A LIAR. a charismatic infiltrator. the type of person who can ingratiate themselves into a group to pluck out information, with all of the worst intentions, and show none of it. team voltron has leaders and diplomats and scientists but it doesnt have someone who can trick a conman at a space bazaar into giving up vital information. someone who can trick and lie and flirt their way into what the team needs all with easy grace. lance is a peacock, so use that. take that flaw and have him hone it into not only a skill, but a finely-sharpened weapon that he can use to help the team.

[unagrancantidaddepanes]

ok i wasnt gonna do it i told myself no im just not gonna say anything on this drama but this is so MINDBOGGLING that i HAVE to make a post about this

i am gonna start by saying as someone on the arospectrum i personally see peridot as either fully aroace or arospec (i like headcanoning either one) and as in a qpr or plantonic friendship with lapis.

peridot has been confirmed to be intended to be read as aroace by a storyboard artist (maya peterson) that would focus on her character, i am not denying that,

however

she is also confirmed to be intended to be read as experiencing romantic attraction, by the OTHER storyboard artist who originally worked on peridot, jesse zuke, who has just as much authority to talk about peridots character, if not more since (to my knowledge) she was the original main storyboard artist for peridot

the intention behind what peridot is suppose to represent is fundamentally contradictory, there is absolutely no use fighting over it. this is so dumb to fight over YES both sides have been confirmed canon THATS WHY THIS IS DUMB </33

ive been trying to find as many actual sources as i can (which has been pretty difficult since A LOT has been deleted) but I finally found a transcript of one of jesse zukes posts that is deleted that everyone keeps referencing

from this reddit post https://www.reddit.com/r/stevenuniverse/comments/5q738i/lauren_zuke_speaks_of_her_intention/

(jesse was formerly known as lauren)

anyone posts something shipping peridot, u get a load of comments saying "this is aroace erasure, shes written as aroace, a storyboard artist said so", anyone posts something about peridot being canonically aroace, u get a load of comments saying "shes not canonically aroace, she was written as experiencing romantic attraction, a storyboard artist said so" everyone is either one or the other it seems like NO ONE is acknowledging that both is true and really this confusion is the fault of the crewniverse ????

these storyboard artists BOTH focused heavily on working on peridot and creating her character, and their intentions behind what she is are completely contradicting.

i would love for peridot to be aroace. to me she IS aroace, but im not going to pretend like this isnt the most confusing most unclear way of confirming that. even if maya peterson intended for her to be seen as aroace, jesse zuke wrote her as the complete opposite and it would be stupid of me to ignore that. harassing eachother over this is stupid. your both correct, now shake hands and make peace with eachother lol, good night.

As an arospec person I am completely fine with people shipping peridot and I do not think it is aroace erasure, because while I would love to see an orientation like mine depicted in a character like peridot, im not going to ignore that fact the she was ALSO originally meant to be read as experiencing romantic attraction AND the fact that many of the crewniverse ships peridot with people or supports others doing it. it is not aroace erasure to ship a character that was literally intended to be read as experiencing romantic attraction by some of the people who worked on her character. rebecca god damn sugar, the creator of steven universe has made fanart shipping peridot. peridots voice actor has said she likes and supports people shipping peridot. its just that different people working on the show had wildly different intentions when creating her character, and didnt clear up a solid identity for her with everyone working on her

jesse zuke said in her post "cant speak for anyone else! many people are writing those episodes". just like if maya peterson and anyone else working on peridot intended for her to be read as aroace, other people working on her character with just as much authority were writing her completely differently. people are not seeming to acknowledge that these two things co-exist. it is not one or the other. even though they are complete opposites, somehow theyve made it so that its both at once.

she was simultaneously written to be both aroace and experiencing romantic attraction by different people writing her character, clearly because of miscommunication within the crewniverse.

heres rebecca sugars ship art btw since the first 2 were really hard to find, in case anyone else wanted some sort of actual evidence of it

also just wanted to bring attention to jesse zuke saying "anyone who wants to see the narrative they want is completely, 100% allowed to". peridot and her episodes were written to have multiple interpretations. this was written with multiple intentions. some of those intentions were aroace, some of them, like jesse zukes, were not. you are all correct peace and love

update i found a slightly longer version of jesse zukes post in this video https://www.youtube.com/watch?app=desktop&v=oIl1sEQ4_iI

"I wanted to close the book on this - I am queer, and intend fully to write queer characters when I do"

this is pretty clear confirmation that peridot was fully written with completely different ideas in mind from completely different people. jesse zuke INTENDED for peridot and lapis to be read as having a queer relationship, in this post shes encouraging people to read it that way, meanwhile other writers had other intentions which are just as real and valid.

inconsistency and messy production in steven universe is not a new thing

[valdrift]

as the end of 2024 has been getting closer ive been both dreading and anticipating the new year and its a feeling tht i really dislike lol (more under cut bc my rambling got way longer than i thought 😦)

like i moved out 2022 and its been amazing for both my mental health and growth as a person since being away from my family gave me the space to figure out what i want to do and how to. idk. live ? got medicated, developed better coping mechanisms, made great friends, etc. i mean im living with my friends rn and theyre like family and i just got licensed to be an lvt and its all great ! but the thing is that my bio family need me and thts probably the root of the issue

cus my family is dirt poor, like living on gov aid, and none of them can work so growing up i was always told how i needed to be successful to take care of them even though i had plenty of rich relatives and i always wondered why none of them bothered to help and decided to put all that responsibility on a kid ?? and i was pretty much raised into being my family's eventual caretaker. from 13-17 i used to be so angry/depressed/resentful about it and hated my family bc it felt like they robbed me of my agency but now, i cant blame them. im not saying they should have done tht to a kid but i understand why. theres a bunch of complicated legal things and other stuff i dont want to get into and my family are either old, disabled, or both and god knows my relatives arent going to help so its up to me yknow ? its why im moving back in with them by 2025 to take care of them. and i love my family, i really do even if i dont tell them bc we dont talk like that and we all know it anyways. my mom is such a strong person despite how everyone looks down on her and i want her to have nice things, i want my family to live in a house that is clean and not falling apart, i want my mom to not have to ever worry about working and to have time for herself bc shes been stuck caring for kids for half her life. i love my family, i want to take care of them, and im angry i never got a choice. family is complicated and i wish it was as easy as just going "i dont want this responsibility" but i know its not

i keep telling myself that this is just how things are supposed to be and im going to spend the rest of my life taking care of them and i thought i accepted it but theres still some small part of me thats reluctant. i know im never going to have a partner or romance bc my family is and always will be my first priority and ig thats sad but i really dont mind. and im not just saying that, like genuinely im fine being single, i dont need companionship and have never felt that loneliness. im just fine with my friends and i dont need anything more, it just kinda sucks i dont get that choice. the whole thing is kinda sad and ive been told as much but these are the cards life dealt me and better me than someone else i guess

truth is im kind of scared, it feels like my life has already peaked and being away from my family has been so freeing but its selfish and damn if i dont want to be selfish for just a little longer. but its hard when i can see my mom getting older and the house getting worse and im angry that this isnt as easy as it should be. this country is awful and the systems in place are cruel and makes life as difficult as possible for people of color, the poor, and disabled. i know i'll get over it and i'll be moving back in and helping them like i promised but i'm only 22. my relatives are acting like i'm wasting my life every second im not helping my family or working towards making 6 figures or whatever and i won't lie it's put doubts in my mind. but im only 22!!!! i dont know. maybe im being dramatic because honestly it could be worse and we're even lucky to have a roof over our heads and to even have a steady source of income no matter how little it is. ive never told anyone the last bit abt being scared and all that, i think its easier to type it than say it, and it also helps i dont have a face to yall and i dont have to look you in the eye. i dont know if ive ever shared this much or anything like this on here either lol. i dont know

tldr; do it scared i guess

[hollowhearts-and-espresso]

on an outsiders kick so heres the main gang as things me and my friends have said

Soda: Your wish is my command. Be gay forever

Steve: I'm still straight but I'd fuck you now

Soda: Not that gay

--

Darry: I dont really like you. Why are you always hanging around?

Dally: I ask myself the same thing every single day

--

Pony: I know we're supposed to be saying embarrassing things about ourselves but before we talk about me i'm really upset Two-Bit didnt mention the fact that he was in love with thomas the train

Two-Bit: i watched ONE episode when i was FIVE go fuck yourself

Pony: You have a shrine by your bed

Two-Bit: irrelevant

--

Johnny: I'm not really scared of anything, no

Johnny: but cats freak me out. and so do dogs, sometimes, but mainly cats. and especially ducks. oh, and needles, and doctors in general. also loud noises, sharp objects near me, any sort of projectile, and stoves. but like, thats not that many things

Dally: I understand so much about you now

--

Pony: I'm going to write a novel and all of you are gonna have characters based off you. Any questions about it?

Two-Bit: Am I hot?

Pony: No. Next question

Darry: Am I going to regret reading this?

Pony: For sure. Next.

Johnny: Please dont make me a crybaby

Pony: You shouldnt read this. Next

Steve: Can me and Soda date?

Pony: You already are. Next

Soda: Can me and Steve not date?

Pony: Too late. You know you love him. Next

Dally: You're going to make my character really deep, arent you?

Pony: Possibly. Havent decided yet. Anything else?

Johnny: Is Dally as hot in the book as he really is?

Pony: I'll no longer be taking questions because I'm extremely uncomfortable, but on second thought, you might really like this book

--

Two-Bit, upon walking in on Steve and Soda cuddling: I leave for FIVE minutes and i'm left out of fucking everything. all the fucking time. i hate everyone in this house

Steve: Do you want to lay with us?

Soda: Yeah, come lay with us

Two-Bit, practically dropping himself on them: I'm still mad at you

--

Dally: For some reason Ponyboy is really obsessed with the idea of me being really soft inside and just not showing it so I dont get hurt. I think he wants me to be narrative foils with our other friend too

Dally: How do i tell him i'd change the narrative doom him if i could and feel no remorse without crushing that hope in him

--

Pony: I like to think its a secret but me and everyone around me knows im writing a slowburn, hes only soft to him trope, slight enemies to lovers fanfiction about Johnny and Dally in my head

Dally: the term fanfiction implies i have fans

Johnny: i'm a fan of you

Pony, whispering: they practically write it themselves

--

Dally: Here, i stole this. dont ask questions, just take it

Darry, taking the sleeping pigeon that Dally just handed him with a mildly horrified expression: where did you get this?

Dally: i told you i'd bring back souvenirs from my field trip. no more questions

--

Johnny: Not many people like me.

Johnny: its probably because im kind of a pussy, but i like to tell myself its because i'm annoying because at least then im not calling myself a pussy

Dally: Wait, wait. Who doesnt like you?

Johnny: Huh? Why does it matter?

Dally: No reason. Just, like, give me an example

Pony, in the kitchen and hears all of this: *puts the knives in the cabinet where Dally wont look for them* I dont really want to have to bail anyone out again

--

Soda, to Darry: I think Steve is kind of in love with me, but I really dont want to have to break it to him that I dont feel the same

Steve, with Soda in his lap: *stops playing with Sodas hair* What?

Soda: Nothing, baby, you're fine

Darry: I will never understand you

--

yes, one of my friends did bring a live pigeon back from a field trip. it slept a lot, and we'd hold him all the time while he slept and he'd stay asleep when we passed him around because we had to move. i hope he wasnt sick and is doing okay

[my-castles-crumbling]

hi cas! i hoping you might be able to give me some advice?

my best friend and i have been friends our whole lives (i just turned 24 two weeks ago, she's turning 24 in two weeks) but ive been have some upsetting feelings about the friendship. i love her so, so much and i know beyond doubt that the feeling is overwhelmingly mutual and there's nothing in the world that could ever change that. i feel very lucky to have a relationship like that, and i feel bad for feeling unsatisfied in some ways with our friendship? we only ever hang out when i ask to which means i can usually count on one hand the amount of times i see her in a whole calendar year lol, we don't talk much and when we do its usually me initiating (again) about stuff about my life and i dont hear much about hers in return (to the point that, she's having a baby next month (!!) and i only learned their name from overhearing someone else's conversation, i only learned the baby room theme the same way, she didn't ask me to help with her gender reveal (nor did she tell me beforehand (which is genuinely so fine, but literally everyone in attendance was surprised that i didnt know so i ended upset about it anyways) or her baby shower (she also didn't include me in any plans or keep me in the loop about anything when she got married a few years ago). ive talked to her so many times about how im feeling about our friendship and how much id liked to be as close as we used to be, if you're claiming im your best friend how on earth am i not worth being told your babies name? she never even told me names they were thinking of. nothing ever comes out of talking to her about it, she expresses sympathy and gets better about things for a minute but then by the next week its exactly back to how it was. shes always been like this to some degree, even when we were closer, but its been getting unbearable now that were out of school and don't live in walking distance of each other anymore. i know having your friendships tested is just a general part of growing up and im just as a fragile age, but im really tired of feeling like i have to beg and plead to have a place in her life; but i don't ever want to completely cut her out of my life so im trying to adapt and content myself with this new dynamic. but since she's about to have a baby all i can think about is how that kid is going to grow up barely knowing who i am and i dont know how to get over that.

oh my god you are living my life lol

I honestly have been through something so similar.

I guess the thing I realized is that some people are able to give you different things at different times in their lives. And expecting them to give you more when they can't/aren't willing to is just hurting you, you know? It sounds like right now, this friend just can't give you more. Not in a malicious way, they just can't. So then the question is, are you willing to give them amount you are giving, only getting what you're getting, or do you want to put that effort into some other people too?

It's okay to decide to put less into a friendship if you're not getting what you need. (It's also okay to be the one putting more in RIGHT NOW, if you know they need that. Obviously, there are times in life (loss, breakups, pregnancies) when friends need more than they can give.) But since it seems like it is usually you putting more in, I wonder what it would feel like if you pulled back a bit?

Naming you 24 anon

[theshelteredbrat]

I'm so done

I don't wanna take care of myself anymore

I don't want to feel anything anymore bc anything I do for some sense of happiness ends badly, makes me feel worse (mainly due to my parents)

But I can't even fucking cry when I try. When I really need to?

But I hate feeling numb so maybe pain will work?

And of course my parents are just sooooo supportive (sarcastic voice). My mom keeps saying things that are basically calling me fat and sluggish. My parents won't let me do shit. Then they get mad at me for so many small stupid things.

They hate whenever I listen to music which is basically my only outlet.

school is fun bc I put on a mask and tell bad jokes and trip over myself to make sure everyone's happy and I'm not hated.

Whenever someone's mad or sad I feel its my fault even tho ik it's not but I feel horrible. And whenever I do share my true feelings they'll either laugh and dismiss it (which happens most of the time) or they get super concerned and I feel like I'm acting out for attention.

And idk I usually regret posting shit like this bc people are always rlly concerned but its sweet considering yall care about me a lot more than most ik irl but plz don't waste ur time over me. Im an attention seeking bitch whos not worth ur time and is js venting

Church and youth group is just great bc God don't care about me. I believe he exists bc I swear he has a grudge against me but he don't bother about me. And I feel like I'm getting preached at whenever I go. But I love the people there and can't really not go to church bc of my parents

And home is just SO MANY FUCKING CHILDREN

Like wtf I'm the oldest, then I get three siblings, which is fine, i love them they're js rlly annoying. Then they get into foster care. Then they stop. Now they're adopting someone. Now they're taking in six boys.

And ik the home is supposed to be a safe space and that's great but I feel so out of place and unwanted and useless. I literally take up a room, a drawer in the bathroom, I eat food. I shower, I use electricity, and tons of money

And I can't get a moment of peace, its literally do this, do that, and chores is good for taking responsibility but like wtf. I feed 1-8 children, get half of them dressed, help with brushing hair and teeth. Now I have to help them learn to read. Help them do their homework. Take them on a walk. Change the diaper.

Wtf this is parenting stuff I shouldn't have to be doing this everyday. My mom doesn't even have a job, she just has two kids during the day and will have to pick kids up (we all go to the same school except for one who takes the bus) and I'm yelled at all the time for being incompetent? For not finding a mess to clean up in a room I haven't been in all day?

For not doing homework when I'd helped everyone else? For not having time to get myself ready bc I have to get kids ready? For not exercising when there's literally no time? For not reading when I don't have any freedom. For saying yes, for saying no, for not having anyextracurricular, for having one?

My mom yells at me that I don't talk to my family enough or spend enough time with them. Do you know how many times I've tried to tell a joke or a cool fact or something funny that happened at school and they yelled at me to be quiet? How many times I've tried to tell them about my friends or a project at school or a new interest I've picked up to be insulted by them? They never fail to point out some flaw or traits that they don't like. How I didn't do something correctly.

Do you know how badly I've wanted to hear "I'm proud of you" in a nondissmissive way? From my family? I heard that from a teacher once in my life. Best memory ever.

I'm so fucking useless and unwanted and numb and tbh i deserve the pain and suffering of life. The mask at school and youth group may crumble and hopefully they'll dismiss me but they almost might get rlly concerned and ill js be the attention seeking bitch like I always am.

Oh God please ignore me. Don't be concerned. Don't waste your time on me. I'm js being a dumb little teen. Sorry if you read that all

[starsinkpop]

what do you think if theres blogs that are not only deeply obsessing with finding out ateez members exact fs but they also discussing their potential body parts. I tried telling them how weird and gross it was of them but they tell me I was taking it too far. what the fuck? am sorry but this kpop tarot thing is what is taking ppls obsession with idols fs too far. its bordering on creepy rn and its not just one blog theres like several of them that mainly focus on idols fs.

some blogs be claiming they dont dig too much but then they still think it ok to even discuss idols sexuality or some other aspect of their personal life.

i’m not really on that side of tumblr or social media so i can’t really say much about it. i have clear boundaries. im fine with certain readings about ateez’s fs but i wouldn’t do more readings than i have online right now. we already know more than enough. i keep getting a crazy amount of asks in my inbox of people trying to fit especially san’s fs aspects. i’m deleting all of them because none of those people reading my stuff and also myself will be their fs. some people really need to touch some grass. when i see certain physical traits in a reading i point them out, however i focus on personality only. what’s bothering me is how almost everyone on here in my inbox assumes that the members are straight. making their fs a girl at all times. we don’t know their sexuality and it’s quite frankly none of our business. we don’t know if their straight or part of the lgbtq+ community. this is why i keep my readings gender neutral because we don’t know shit.

now in general i don’t want to spread any negativity because life itself is already a big struggle for most of us. i want my blog to be a place where people could just entertain themselves for a bit and. so i won’t say anything about other readers because i honestly just can’t. like i said, im not on that side of tumblr. i get your point but you have to remember you’re telling me this, im a kpop (well just ateez) tarot reader myself and i’ve done reading about their fs too so 🤷‍♀️🤣 like i said, i have my boundaries with readings, won’t do any sexual readings and i don’t focus on looks. being someone who was crazily sexualized since being a child, i really hate this side of any fandom. there’s too many obsessions going on. you wanna know what happened when i saw the most recent pool pics of the members, especially san and woo? as a gym girly i was like “woah i really need to know their routine so i can shape my body like theirs” i can just admire them. viewers here are a little too delulu and have a hard time sticking to reality and form an own opinion it feels like. and I’m sure some readers feed into that. it’s giving you a ton of likes and if that’s their main purpose for posting i guess i get it. that doesn’t mean i’m okay with that but i know many people need validation like that. whenever there’s people coming up and officially date like twice’s jihyo for example i always feel really warm around my heart. gives me the feeling they can still have a bit of a normal life.

i don’t really have anything else to say and only repeat myself. i don’t know if i’m the right person to talk to about that, i do readings and did fs readings like what you just complaint about, but i have boundaries and know what’s reality. none of us will be with any of them, ever and viewers should stop honestly believing “omg XYs fs is like this and that, i’m just like that it has to be me they have to do more detailed readings so i can make it fit for myself”.

on another note, and this is in no means anything bad or hate whatsoever, i love getting asks from you but those long asks are sometimes a bit much because im not your diary, love 🤣 no hate. but it just felt like a rant and i do really like rants but my inbox is maybe not the best place for that because i don’t want to spam any of my followers page with that you know?

edit: you can still send me longer asks, but please try fitting the stuff you want to say into one ask and not three or more 💖

[redrydersrequiem]

Reunited chapter 2

Previous chapter Next chapter

This is again for my own entertainment. I like to write even if im not the best at it. I like to use pictures and gifs in my stories it makes it more theatrical in my mind. I redo sentences and add stuff all the time cause I continuously reread my stuff and try to fix things. I hope everyone enjoys and i hope all of you have a good day. ❤️

Miles pov

Light blind my foggy eyes everything coming slowly into view when something big and blue takes up the most of my view

“Colonel, can you hear me?”. A blue savage is starring down at me and my first reaction is to punch the hell out of them.

Everything is jumbled as i dont know where i am or whats going on just that i have a hostile near me and i need to get the hell up out of here. More hostile show up all i can do is take swings at them as they try to grab me and hold me down. The first one from before is now infront of me again. While the others all hold me back.

“Hold him! Calm down colonel! Come on its me corporal wainfleet!

I finaly take a breath and focus on the face in front of me. Wait did that thing said he was corporal wainfleet. What. Squinting at the Navi in front i see it actually does look like Lyle but blue

“Lyle? Is it you?”

“Yes and Z-dog and Fig.” Lyle says gesturing to the two navis respectfully holding me.

I take a moment and collect myself

“Just let me go. I'm completely calm.” I can see they all slightly hesitate but do so anyway, still keeping their hand up just in case I start swinging again. But i don't care about them right now i'm looking down and finally notice my own two fists are no longer the tan skin I'm used to, instead they are blue. No it can’t be. I push Wainfleet aside and go toward the giant glass window in front of me. One of those savages stares back at me from the mirror. Hands moving the same as mine eyes blinking the same everything.

“Well ain’t this a bitch.” I say now realizing what has become of me.

After being checked out by the scientist I'm reunited with wainfleet and ordered to watch some video from my past or some shit like that.

“Attention two minutes until we hit the surface.”

I just ignore the soldier barking orders at me floating around trying to watch the video I've been told I have to. Once it starts my previous self shows up on the screen. All tan skin and gray hair. Tough guy military stance through and through

“ In case you were in doubt you are Colonel MIles Quaritch, just younger, taller, bluer and less pretty.”

I just huff at my former selfs gusto.

“In six hours I will attack the Navi fortress. It was thought advisable that I make this backup. Parker what the hell else do i need to say to this.”

“Just remind him how it works anything else you need him to know yada yada”

“ Freaking useless” I hear the former human say under his breath.

“Your memories and your personality are going to be sent back to earth where you are being cultivated just like the other lucky sobs of our team. You are a recombinant soul with my memories and my charm. You wont be able to remember my death because it won't happen.”

A chuckle occurs from over the humans shoulder, a female chuckle

“Miles are you guys just now doing your daily video logs cause if you are i'm gonna have to write you up.”

A woman appears behind miles, everyone else in the background looking sheepish until she fully enters the frame. She is gorgeous. Her smile breathtaking, making my heart pulse loudly a low pur coming from my blue chest.

“Hello there darlin. How’s the baby.?”

Baby? What baby? Is all i can think, attention directly on the video playing as my tail flags anxiously behind me. Stupid thing.

“Jr is fine he’s at his check up asleep waiting for the nurses to finish all the scans i thought i would check in on yall, what are you all doing all secretly up in here hmm”

“Nothing darlin, Parker just making us all catch up on our chores right guys. I hear yes and aye aye from the background”

“Well if you guys would just do what you're supposed to you wouldn’t get in trouble.”

“Your right darlin. Why are you in here though aren’t you tired.”

“I am but just because I had a baby doesn’t mean I can’t help out. The lab people are running around and I'm just making sure everyone is where they are supposed to be.”

“Well why don't you go back to our room and sleep darlin i'll make sure your job is all done ok and i'll pick up jr.”

“Miles, if I didn’t know any better I would say you're trying to get rid of me. Not at all mamas, I just want you and the little one to be all rested.

“Sure. Fine ill let you get back to your little video.”

The woman moves off my predecessor's lap but not before bending down to cup his face, planting a quick kiss on his lips. I notice a ring around her finger. So she wasn’t just a baby momma she actually meant something to him, to me. As she slips away the original faces back at the camera and measures it with a tight look

“That right there is something very important. She means the world remember that soldier with out her you ain’t got nothin. Now she doesn’t know whats about to go down. Or maybe she does i dont know, shes quicker than she looks. But remember she is to be protected. Whatever happens you as a clone have two objectives, the most important: take care of that beautiful thing you just saw. And secondly get revenge on the man who almost took her away Jake Sully. Remember that a marine can never be defeated. You can kill us but well just regroup in hell. Semper fi.”

“Ohrah” I hear Lyle say floating in front of me.

“Lyle, who was that?”

“Who was who, Colonel, the girl?

“Yeah”

“Oh that was y/n”.

“y/n” memories start flooding my mind I can hear her voice. Smell her scent. Feel her hands caress my face.

“She was important to me huh?”

“Yeah she was your fiancé. She was part of our team remember

“Yeah i think but i don't remember everything”

“It’s cool colonel give it a bit they said we'll get all our memories back in time”

“Wait you said she was part of our team right.”

“Yeah colonel she was a great field medic but also a great soldier”

“What happened to her?”

“I, I, actually don't know, I don't remember!, hey geeks were missing someone.” Lyle yells over to the scientist but before they can answer we hear the landing protocol go into effect. I guess we'll deal with this when we get to the ground.

After we get to the ground i half pay attention to what ever they yell at us. More focused on seeing my team and finding out what happened to y/n. I drop the subject for the Moment as i go over to the rest of my team to start our briefing

“Well lady’s we are definitely not in Kansas anymore. We’re on our way to pandora. I know you're all asking yourselves the same question: why so blue?”

Chuckles go around as the twelve sets of eyes focus on me.

“The sins of the past have made us reborn in the form of our enemies. We have their size, their strength and their speed, added to our training its a powerful cocktail”.

“We got a mission?”. Lopez asks from his set in the back

“We do. Our mission is to find and kill the leader of the Navi rebel army. They call him Toruk makto. We called him Jake sully.”

“But before we get to hunting I know you’ve all noticed we're missing a body here”.

“Yeah where is y/l/n.”

“I dont know yet zdarnski but trust me i'm going to find out so till then you all go about your business while i figure out mine.”

Lyle is at my six as we stalk through the base looking for the head a General Ardmore.

“Colonel there they are”, Lyle points over to a middle aged woman head bitch energy radiating from her. Emphasis on the bitch

“General Ardmore” i say standing at the ready in front of the small woman

“Nice to meet you, Colonel. I hear good things. But a lot has changed since you were last here. Come”

“She gestures walking through the bridehead”

“The new command center here has just been commissioned. The crowd fitters can erect a building in six days. We’ve done more here in one year than in the previous 30 years. No longer is our mission her to mine. It’s to tame. We are here to make pandora the new home of humanity. But before we can do that we have to pacify the savages, Sullys whims have become bolder and more frequent. His attacks are well executed. Good coordination between the troops. We only know that they are probably hiding out between the hallelujah mountains and we are still unable to flush them out. That is where your team will come in.”

“That’s all and well but I do have a pressing matter to deal with first.

“And what is that colonel?

“I seem to be missing an important member of my team.

“Ahh yes come with me”

She leads Lyle and i around to a lab looking sector. The ceilings were thankfully high enough we didn't have to crouch. It was just getting through doors that sucked. Taking sips of the co in my mask we come to a giant window, probably looking into a lab. The general presses a few buttons and the once dark glass now becomes clear. A Navi women who looked very much like y/n

“No.”

“Sorry general i know you had relations with this women when you where human is that correct”

“To my knowledge yes but none of the files said she had died.”

“Yes, well with what we found we were able to determine she died of blood loss during the battle of hometree. She and another soldier were both gunned down by the natives.”

My hands just clenched into fists as I continued to stare at the young women behind the glass.

“Since she was part of your unit and a capable soldier she was also made part of project phoenix. Although due to her health problems her backup was from a much earlier date then the rest of you. Like you all she went back to her twenty year old self with her memories being uploaded from the video logs she did before the battle. Like you all as well she doesn’t remember or know of her death. Unlike you though We had to take more liberties with some of her memories since she was very personable with the traitors during you time which is why i have a hard job for you colonel”

“And what would that be”

“I want you and your unit to keep a very close eye on Corporal y/l/n here to make sure she stays on mission. Got it”

“Understood general.”

“Good she should be woken up soon and the scientist think it would help for you to be there. They’ll contact you when they are ready till then im sure you both have other people to notify.

Your pov

Everything hurts. My body feels like I’ve never moved but over worked every muscle at the same time. My ears are ringing and my eyes sting. What is going on? Did I get sick overnight or something? Damn. I hear clapping and a few snaps next to my ears startling me, probably one of the others messing with me but I can’t bring myself to swat at the sound.

“Corporal can you hear us”

“Huh”

“Corporal i need you to open your eyes if you can

Wait am I in medical right now what happened?

“I slowly open my eyes, a bright light flowing into them

“Responses look good. Ok corporal y/l/n can you look at us please”

I finally turn my head and see a nurse. A tiny nurse. What the hell?I try to swing up quick but everyone goes on to try and calm me down, everyone is tiny looking and starting to freak me out. But suddenly blue flashes in my peripheral

“Darlin, I need you to calm down.”

Wait, that voice that's Miles, miles will help me. I quickly turn to look at the voice of the man I love when a male navi stares back at me. My jerk reaction is to push him away. Some unknown man staring at me while I feel like I've been drugged yeah that's a no go situation but the male grabs on hard to my arms. It’s not until I go to push again that I notice my arms aren't my arms

“Darlin, I need you to calm down and take a breath real quick, ok.”

I'm just frozen in shock

“ Quartich?”

“Yeah l/n it’s me”

I then turn and see the other avatar that tried to grab me looked familiar as well

“Wainfleet?”

“Hey sweet cheeks.”

Miles just growls out at Lyle and that when I know for sure it’s my miles that’s standing in front of me. The boys get me to calm down as the doctors now look me over. I myself am too busy staring in the Mirror at my new body to pay attention to anything they say. Wainfleet had taken up a spot along the wall in my view to give me some reassurance. While miles had gone off to speak with someone I just continued to stare. It was me that looked in the mirror but it wasn’t me that looked back.

After getting my bill of health, some fresh clothes and a run down on the co2 mask and where i have to use them. Miles and Lyle escort me to our new quarters. Entering everything is gigantic. It would probably be comical if any normal humans saw it.

“L/N” I hear called out loudly as a body comes crashing with mine.

It’s Z-dog with lopez and mansks not far behind her behind all the others also standing to come greet me

“Wow zdinarsk it you i'm so glad to see you again.”

I grab and hug z much to her jargon.(she’s not really a hugger) Lopez and Mansks also come over and pull me into a quick hug, everyone else nodding at me with a smile on their face.

“Look At you all. It’s kinda weird everyone being blue.”

“Don’t you know it” Hear ja call out from the back of the group

Everyone just laughing as miles and Lyle rejoin everyone now that i've been reintegrated

“Well would you look at that, the whole squad together again.” Lyle says tucking me and z in each arm squeezing us into his side. We both just exchange a glance before brushing him off onto the floor, everyone else laughing.

“That's enough ladies. I hear miles shout into the room”

“You all know you rooms we'll meet back here tomorrow morning o700 hours”

Roger colonel. Everyone just salutes and goes back to goofing around or going to their designated quarters. I kind of just stand there like a deer in headlights watching it all. Taking in everyone’s new faces and body’s. My family is back together again and right now that's all I can find it in me to care about.

The next couple of days are very tiring. Training to get back into shape and familiar with our new body’s strength and size. Miles is a constant by my side, us practically going right back to where we left off. But it feels like i'm forgetting something, something important, it's on the tip of my tongue but it wont come out.

I see Miles get particularly more on guard whenever the general comes around to visit, always throwing quick glances at me. I have to admit the woman rubs me the wrong way but I'm grateful to her and the rda for bringing me and my family back together again. But thats where my loyalties end. The others all go back into their roles in the group, no one really focusing on the past or what happened to them more inclined to stay in the present and think of the future. We’re finally given the go ahead to search the area, while i don't agree with trying to capture anyone i have no choice but to follow our orders to find a person called toruk makto.

We get into the Forrest everything is beautiful. I always thought pandora was beautiful but being able to experience it with out a mask is crazy. Walking under gigantic leafs i just take my hand up and spin under it filling its soft texture. Lyle laughs at my childishness but I can’t tell he thinks its cool out here judging by the look on his face when a bunch of helicopter lizards Kenten if i remember correctly start flying around us.

Miles stops and gives the order to fan out in the clearing. I see its an old shack. But why is it out here and why is it so familiar?.Before i can think more miles tells me to survey the surrounding area.While he and two others go survey the field I do as he says not wanting to question things in a possibly hostaile invironment

Miles pov

We make it the last known location of Jake sully. Not wanting to compromise y/n i have her survey the surrounding area as myself Lyle and zdog approach the old shack. Z and Lopez scope the shack as Lyle and i survey the ruins of an old amp suit.

Scrapping the moss off the side i see it was my old amp suit. There’s no body inside just the remnants of broken glass and a old arrow sticking through the seat.

“Lyle see what you can pull of this thing.”

I stand up taking a breath my eyes finding y/n looking at some plant growing on a tree. A smile wide on her face. It calms me to watch her be at peace.

“Here you go sir.” Lyle hands me a screen to watch the amp final moments

On the screen i see jake in his avatar form all dressed up for war.

But then i see y/n. Human y/n stumbling into the clearing and standing between us.

What the fuck are you doing there darlin. I say to my self my eyes still glued to the screen.

She’s trying to talk us both down. And i can tell by my former selfs body posture falling that whatever shes saying is working. That is until i hear her scream at something behind me. The angle turning quickly to be meet with the female savage jake had found. And a very familiar arrow coming straight toward me

The screen changes once more to y/n above me tears in her eyes and thats where it all stops

That bastard killed me. But wait y/n was there I thought the general said she was with another soldier when she was gunned down. I have so many questions im unable to process as a crunching noise comes from the brush off in the distance

Your pov

The old battle ground makes me unsteady like an impending dread that fills my heart

Miles and the others have all made sure I’m not really part of whatever they are doing I’m just perimeter surveillance I know miles is having the same issues I am but he’s pushing through

I see something white float through the sky. It's an Atokirina, it's beautiful almost like the seeds of a dandelion, It floats peacefully towards me. I hold out my palms as it grows closer and closer gently landing in my outstretched hands. Just as the seed setteles in my hand i hear yelling form the group behind me. I run back to the group gun ready to some face to face with Navi children being manhandled by the others

Hey wait they’re just kids. I try to get out but the others ignore me. I try again but the words stop when i see a human boy as well. Covered in blue strips with a mask on his face.

Miles pov

Three Navi children and a human are all captured in a second. I look over them all seeing they look somewhat like us. The young male has eyebrows and a very familiar looking face. Lyle points out that he thinks we have half breeds on our hands holding up the older girls hand to show five fingers. Now that got my attention

“Show me you hands kid” The kid just flips me off. Now i know there’s no doubt why the kid looks familiar. He looks like his father

“Your his”

I can hear y/n calling out to us to calm down and that they where just kids but I force myself to ignore her. It’s not till I go towards the youngest one that I see the human that was with them closely.

His hair is matted into dreads and he has blue stripes painted on him

He also looks familiar

“What’s your name kid?”

“Spider, spider l/n

“Miles?”

No one calls me that.”

Before I can say anything else I hear a sharp gasp from behind me. Y/n pushing through us to go towards the boy.

Your pov

“Wait your name is miles.” I say staring at the young boy. The longer I look the more the pain in my head and heart grow, I can feel myself starting to hyperventilate. The longer I stare into the child’s blue eyes. Eyes that reminded me oh so much of the man I love.

“But that's impossible the rda wouldn’t have left you here. They were supposed to take care of you” I can’t even make a complete thought as my hands gently try to reach out to the boy ghosting over his arms and face

The tears are blurring as the child just stares at me in shock

“Mom?”

“My baby” is all I can choke out before the ringing in my head turns up to a thousand

Spiders pov

The female is looking at me with tears in her eyes as she crouches down to be height level with me. It’s starting to freak me out but I can’t look away from her. Like there’s a string pulling my to go to her and giver her a hug but that’s stupid she obviously just another soldier just like quartich. But…..Wait it can’t be. The more I look at her the more familiar she becomes. She looks just like the photo I have. The slope of her nose and cheeks. The shape of her face and as she smiles at me is when it hits me

“Mom?”

Miles pov

I can tell she’s shocked seeing the kid. I know I should pull her back before something bad happens but my body won’t move my mind not wanting to take this from her. It’s not until she yells out that I finally move

“Y/n.” I just charge over to her grabbing and pulling her away from everything back into the opening field.

“Y/n,Y/n look at me what’s wrong “

“My head miles I.”

“Shh it’s ok just breath lyle come here”

Lyle bounds over and takes my silent command to look after y/n while I go and speak with spider

The sully kids pov

Why is that lady on the ground and what’s going on?, are all the kids can think as they continue to struggle against the people holding them. It’s not until they hear the words “my baby come”from her is that they realize the avatar in front of them was none other than the y/n l/n spider's mother. Come back from the grave just like quartich. It is impossible, wait till dad sees this. A broken yell breaks them out of their silent conversation as they see y/n no longer in front of spider but now on the ground clutching her head, Quartich and the bald one next to her. All of the others look at them and her with worry evident on their faces. She obviously means something to all of them

Miles pov

Taking in the surroundings I go and radio to the bridge head our location and how I need a pickup when getting a confirmation i walk back over to the sully boy.

“Ok kids here’s what’s going to happen you All are going to deliver a little message to you dad for me.” I slap a com link in the boys hand and stare him down

“Your daddy needs to give himself up while I’m still being nice. And if he doesn’t there’s going to be an all out manhunt for him and your family got it.

The kid just hisses at me.

“And to make sure you all deliver my message spider here is coming with us”

“What no let us go the older female screams”

All of the kids are struggling to protect their friend. I have to admit I was glad he had such loyal friends.Shaking my head a squashing those feelings down

“Let the kids go”

“What but sir “

“Just do it we need to leave”

The others toss the kids away from them guns raising to make sure none of the little shits attacked us while our backs were turned

Taking spider in hand I shove him towards Lyle. Exchanging the struggling teen for the hurt women. Holding y/n close as the chopper starts to come into view. The rain has started casting the clearing into darkness. My team continues to watch my back protecting me and y/n from the sully kids and the danger that may lurk behind them. It’s not till I hear a clear yipping sound call through the air and see the children all react to it. That I know he’s out there. Him and that she demon he married. The sound comes again and the children book it out of the clearing back into the safety of the trees. Ordering the team to load up and placing y/n in Mansks arms I decide to turn back surveying the trees. That’s when a shadow in one of the large trees catches my attention. It moves slightly as another one comes into view just below it.

“Jake!!!” I yell out. “I know you're out there sully. I hope with this I’ve gotten your attention. Tell you boy there to relay my message. I’ll be seeing you again real soon.” I hop into the chopper and we quickly make our ascent back towards the bridgehead.

Back at the bridgehead spider is taken to a holding room per the general's orders now while I don't agree I had more pressing matters on my hand.

Y/n looked exhausted, her eyes sunken and ears and tail twitching everywhere.

“Darlin how you feel?”.

“My head is killing me.”

“The science pukes said it would pass. Everything will be ok

“No, everything will not be miles. I'm so confused about what is going on. Why are we after Jake? I thought Jake was our friend

“Well that’s a long story. Here what's the last thing you remember.

“From when I was human.?”

I just nod tail flicking behind him worriedly

“I remember you proposing and I remember being assigned to help Jake and the science group, I remember having our son and being so happy. but after that nothing…. Now you tell me what am I missing.

“A lot happened darlin. While Jake was on our side he and the others decided to turn their backs on humanity. They…

“What do you mean turn their back on humanity Miles, you i both know the rda didn’t and still doesn’t care about the Navi. What every they did they were probably in the right.

“How does killing everyone we love as a family make them right.

“They were protecting themselves and their homes just like we would do if the roles were reversed. This is all once again the RDAs fault.

“Darlin you and I both know we owe everything to the rda. Now I'm sorry this situation is not what you want it to be hell i don't want it to be but we have to do what we're told ok. Just focus on yourself for once in your life i beg of you

“Miles that's not how life works

“Well i'm gonna need it to cause i don't need you giving the general any ideas”

“The general, what does she have to do with this?”

“She knew you were close to the traitors in the past. They didn’t want that becoming a detriment to their current mission. Our current mission may remind you. So they have me watching you. And if you slip up im supposed to hand you over.”

“Understanding comes to my face as I see now why miles was always so closed off to me recently.”

“So for my own sanity and your survival i need you to continue with the mission do you understand”

“Miles im not going to”

“Y/n i'm not asking i need you to do this until we can figure something else out please.

“God this situation is so fucked” All i can do is pace around while miles sits on the edge of the bed.

“Fine I’ll pretend if it keeps you and the others safe I’ll pretend but I refuse to hurt anyone miles. You have to realize this isn't the same as then, now we are the navi and I know without a doubt the rda does not care about any of our blue ass’s.”

“Your right darlin, we all know it but”

“But, we have to come up with a plan. I don't want to lose everyone again and I refuse to lose my son again. Ok.”

“Ok”

“Now speaking of we have a very alive problem staying in this room right now that we need to take care of first please i want to see him”

“Darlin I can’t let you do that.. i see he's staring at me but his cute little ears are drawn back and his eyes hold guilt”

“Miles where’s our son”

“Darlin hes not your son”

“Where is he miles” I yell out at the marine now blocking my way

“The general has him darlin’

“WHAT!”

“Wait! Goddamit!” She storms past me despite my best attempt to block her into our room. She always was quick and make it seem all to easy getting passed me to make her way to the interrogation wing. Running after her I stop quickly grabbing z dog and Lyle who just stood watching me storm past them. They follow after me quickly. I’m already trying to come up with what to say for damage control

Shit!”

Your pov

I get to the room and my blood boils. There he is ,little miles or spider as he kept calling him self earlier. Hes standing strapped to some sort of machine as the general yells out where’s Jake sully?" I can’t even begin to think straight taking in the scene in front of me. All I know is that my son is screaming with blood now slowly falling from his nose. Oh hell no. I immediately rush over stopping the machine before Ardmore can stop me and just as miles,Lyle and z-dog all come into the room.

“And what the hell do you think you're doing?”she screams, stomping over to me but Miles quickly grabs me by the back of the neck and pushes me towards z and wainfleet.

“Colonel is there a problem here?” she asks eyeing my struggling form

“No ma’am.” Miles say signaling to the others to fully haul me out of the way

Miles pov

“Colonel I thought you said l/n wasn’t acting out “

“She’s fine we’ve been able to sidetrack and subdue her from thinking of the past to long

“Good now explain what the hell that was just now”

“Simple general we just found our in”

“Excuse me”

“You know how they say never get between a mama lion and her cub. That’s what just happened l/n’s outburst just proved to the kid he can trust her and with that well be able to get him to trust us and give up sullys operation. “

“He’s not your son colonel this is not the time to play happy family is that understood “

“Yes sir”

“Good I will warn you once again do not let l/n compromise this mission or she will be put down is that understood “

“Understood general . I salute to the smug women in front of me though it takes all my will power and walk out to find y/n and spider”